RS - June 2017

realsimple LIFE MADE EASIER

Get It Done!

100 beauty and style finds under $100

Genius shor tcut s to che ck of f ever y thing on your list

Finish tasks in a flash (laundry included) p. 124

E L E G A N T, EFFORTLES S R ECI P E S T O E N J OY ALL SUMMER

+ H AV E F U N O N VACAT IO N FOR LESS MONEY

+ MAKE E V E R Y D AY MORE R E L AX I N G

JUNE 2017

©2017 P&G

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This page: La Blanca One-piece, $128. Opposite page from top left: Miraclesuit One-piece, $174.

Gibson & Latimer Tankini top, $52; Bottom, $42. Miraclesuit One-piece, $166. Kenneth Cole Reaction Hankini top, $70; Bottom, $56.

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10

“You can’t be that kid s tanding at the top of the waterslide, over thinking it.

You have to go down the chute.” ― T I N A F E Y, B O S S Y P A N T S Photograph by Graham Dunn

J U N E 2017

T H E L I C E N S I N G P R O J E C T. C O M

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12

Editor ’s Note

GET IT DONE!

from the bedroom closet as if sadly wondering whether today might be their big day. But it wasn’t. Not that day or any other, because while I’d fallen for them in the store, I’d never found tops that looked good with them. So there they hung, unworn and judging me each harried morning. The skirts had become less a wardrobe dilemma than a tiny failure.

I had written “skirts” on the to-do list on my phone months ago, which brought about zero action. I would see the word “skirts” on the list and think, “Really, this is still on the list?”

I needed to do it or delete it.

All of us have something we’d like to get done, whether it’s a room that needs painting, a new plan to get our finances in order, or a tricky conversation with a loved one. Sometimes we transfer these to-dos from list to list, and they start to feel like a weight on our shoulders, always there in the background.

That’s why I came up with the Real Simple Get It Done Challenge. Our team is here to help you tackle your project with ideas throughout this issue. Sometimes it’s just hard to find the time, the energy, or the motivation. We tackle all of those starting on page 124. Why now? Because this month is the perfect moment to check things off your list so you can have a more relaxing summer!

Oh, and about those skirts: I took some advice I had read in Real Simple a few years ago—that if you’re procrastinating a task, it’s great to enlist a friend or a professional.

I’m lucky to have both in personal shopper and stylist Alyssa Dineen. We spent a morning culling my closet and then swinging through a few Brooklyn, New York, boutiques for tops. She helped me understand that I was choosing the wrong shapes (I was wearing tighter tops when the skirts had some volume, but needed a boxier look to balance the silhouette) and defaulting to basic white when a neutral, like pale denim, was both on-trend and more interesting.

Now when I look in my closet, I see outfits ready to grab and go with. Can a skirt smile? Maybe.

Follow me on Twitter @lyazel

and Instagram @leslieyazel

JUNE 2017

SHOPPING SOLVER Why do I have “nothing to wear”?

My stylist friend Alyssa, left, called it: too many statement pieces, nothing to wear them with.

Her rule: 80 percent basics, 20 percent wow items. We found both at Bird (birdbrooklyn.com).

P H OTO G R A P H S BY J E S S ICA A N TO L A ; FA S H IO N ST Y L I N G BY A LYS S A DI N E EN ; H A I R A N D M A K EU P BY M EL PA L DI N O W I T H N A R S F O R EN N I S I N C.

E

ACH MORNING , the skirts would stare out at me

All month long, Real Simple editors will be live on Facebook teaching one another how to tackle projects ranging from cooking to organizing to mastering beauty techniques. Check us out! #getitdone

Where will color take you? ® Ask Sherwin-Williams and discover a whole new world of color with the very best paint. Your neighborhood store is just around the corner.

Download our ColorSnap® app for color inspiration in the palm of your hand. © 2017 The Sher win-Williams Company

15

Contents June 2017

ON THE COVER Get it done! Genius shortcuts to check off everything on your list 124 Elegant, effortless recipes to enjoy all summer 136 Have fun on vacation for less money 105 Make every day more relaxing 117 100 beauty and style finds under $100 144

124 A well-ordered life

117

136

85

Healthy ways to unwind

Fresh seasonal feasts

Eye-catching shades

COVER PHOTOGRAPH BY JAMIE CHUNG PROP STYLING BY ALEX BRANNIAN

SOFT STYLING BY MARIANA VERA

J U N E 2017

16

Contents Thoughts Editor’s Note Real Simple 24/7 Your Words The Short List

Balance

10 12 20 23 26

Cash-Saving Hacks for Every Vacation 105 How They Do It Five VIPs on starting the day right 112

What We Love

Productivity Primer Tips for a happy-making work space 114

DIY Plant Hanger And more cool stuff to enjoy this month 29 The Staple Dill pickles

32

Little Helpers

34

175

Pretty Smart Beauty buys to simplify your routine 36 My Favorite Piece L.A. designer Kelly Wearstler

Things Cooks Know

46

Tastes Like Summer Six recipes starring the season’s freshest produce 136

144

The Hot 100 Warm-weather fashion and beauty under $100 144

Does It Really Work?

Self-tanners 49 Organize This Junk drawer

55

Pretty Practical Easy ombré eyes

56

Now What?!?

59

Road Test Sunscreen Trend to Try Bold stripes Real Simplifier Ace that triathlon

60 62 67

The Right Gift for Everyone From dads to grads

69

Summer-Proof Your Skin

77

Sunny Delights Fun sunglass trends

85

123

It Feels So Good to Get It Done Your everything guide to the tasks you avoid 124

The Realist 41

117

Ahhh

Features

38

How to Care for Your Swimsuit

The Trouble with Me Time Think self-care, not self-indulgence

The Woman Who Made Me Who I Am What fictional character inspired you most? 154

Relating 5 Questions You Should Ask Your Dad 91

Food

Good Read Homesick in Barcelona, Ilana Manaster finds a community in an unexpected place 94

5 Easy Dinners

Modern Manners Catherine Newman on your stickiest etiquette issues 100 What’s Selling at the Pet Store?

Peek inside a high-end puppy boutique 102

77

162

Road Test Lunch boxes

171

Make It Yourself Barbecue sauce

175

Big Batch Lemonade concentrate 178

The Struggle Is Real Rituals

180 184

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J U N E 2017

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18

TIME INC. CHIEF EXECUTIVE OFFICER Rich Battista CHIEF OPERATING OFFICER Jennifer Wong CHIEF CONTENT OFFICER Alan Murray EDITORIAL DIRECTOR Nathan Lump EDITORIAL OPERATIONS/FINANCE DIRECTOR Clare McHugh GENERAL MANAGER, LIFESTYLE Regina Buckley

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RESEARCH CHIEF Westry Green CONTRIBUTING RESEARCHERS

PREMEDIA DIRECTOR Richard Prue PREMEDIA MANAGER Claudio Muller

ASSISTANT BEAUTY EDITOR

Molly M. Ginty, Maya Kukes

Lisa DeSantis

CATEGORY SALES BEAUTY Lauren Newman ENTERTAINMENT Ellie Duque FINANCE Mike Schneider HEALTH CARE Heidi Anderson HOME Alex Desanctis FASHION AND RETAIL Matt Rice

MARKETING

Lindsey Burgess, Jenny Hedges, Heather Kimoto

INDUSTRY/GOVERNMENT/TOBACCO/ GOLF Nate Stamos TECHNOLOGY/ TELECOMMUNICATIONS Scott Kelliher TRAVEL Joe Messer

PRODUCTION

SALES OPERATIONS

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TIME INC. ADVERTISING SALES GROUP PRESIDENTS Karen Kovacs, Greg Schumann DIGITAL STRATEGY Andrew Reedman, Thu Phan Rodriguez BRAND SALES VP, LIFESTYLE BRAND SALES Ann Gobel VP, BRAND SALES DIRECTOR Lori Fromm BRAND SALES DIRECTORS Kate Brower,

Rosemarie Iazzetta PRODUCTION MANAGER

George Woods Jr. ADVERTISING PRODUCTION SPECIALIST Swarna Priya

J U N E 2017

SVP, ADVERTISING AND BRAND MARKETING Susan Parkes VP, BRAND MARKETING—LIFESTYLE, LUXURY, AND SHELTER Vildia

DESIGN DIRECTOR, BRAND MARKETING, LIFESTYLE Colleen Lennon SENIOR DESIGNER, BRAND MARKETING, LIFESTYLE Carolyn Marks

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SVP/GENERAL MANAGER Patty Hirsch VP/GENERAL MANAGER, LIFESTYLE

Lindsay Jerutis SENIOR DIRECTOR, LIFESTYLE DIGITAL PRODUCT Maura Charles PRODUCT MANAGER Kerri Lynn SENIOR DIGITAL MERCHANDISING MANAGER

Contessa Schexnayder

Shift You

HGTV, HGTV Smart Home, and HGTV Smart Home Giveaway logos are trademarks of Scripps Networks, LLC. Used with permission; all rights reserved.

©2017 VELUX Group

It’s time to take a fresh look at your ceiling. With added design space, it’s more than a roof over your head.

It’s your fifth wall. With the touch of a button, VELUX skylights transform spaces with fresh air and daylight from above, so you can aim higher than the average wall. Learn more at whyskylights.com.

o o l k t . u O r

20

Real Simple 24/ 7 Follow us online F O R E XC LU S I V E

I D E A S , T I P S , A N D WAY S T O M A K E L I F E E A S I E R — E V E R Y D AY. C H EC K I T O U T

From cleaning to entertaining, we have a checklist for just about everything. Cross items off your to-do list with ease! Find them at realsimple .com/todo.

MEET

DANIELLE JONES D E S IG N DI R ECTO R AT R E AL S I M P L E

Where do you find design inspiration?

Everywhere. I’m inspired by what’s around me.

Summer plans?

Lots of outdoor time with my fiancé and my dog. Beach days!

What’s your “Get It Done” project?

Finally organizing my closet. Shoes everywhere! @DANIELLEJONES713 ON INSTAGRAM

#

#GETITDONE

Not your ordinary ice cream cone Look closely: There’s a sneaky reason this cone isn’t melting. The “ice cream” is actually cookie dough that’s safe to eat. Try it—fool the kids and thank us later. Get the scoop at realsimple.com/ cookiedough.

This month, our editors are tackling projects they’ve put off.

Join us and share your own progress on Instagram and Twitter with #getitdone.

PINTEREST @REALSIMPLE

TWITTER @REALSIMPLE

FAC E B O O K @REALSIMPLE

J U N E 2017

S N A P C H AT @REALSIMPLEMAG

I N S TA G R A M @ R E A L _S I M P L E

C LO C K W I S E F R O M TO P L E F T : C O U RT E SY O F DA N I E L L E J O N E S ; P H OTO G R A P H BY G R EG D U P R E E , F O O D ST Y L I N G BY C H E L S E A Z I M M E R , PROP ST YL ING BY CL A IRE SPOLLEN; GET T Y IMAGES; COURTESY OF RE AL SIMPLE.COM

S AVO R S U M M E R Subscribe to our “Best of Summer” newsletter, and each week we’ll send travel tips, recipes (veggie tacos, anyone?), and more straight to your inbox.

Sign up today by visiting realsimple.com/summer.

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THE REALIST

23

Yo u r W o r d s

What long-procrastinated task did you finally cross off your list?

Estate planning.

So impor tant but so easy to procrastinate.

KRISTIN PEREZ , W A LT H A M , MASSACHUSET TS

#WOMENIRL

@ K E A R YA N N B I X B Y S AY S , “ S O M E D AY I ’ L L H A V E T O P AY A L L O W A N C E . . .

BUT UNTIL THEN #MOMMASHELPER.”

It had been almost 10 years since I had cleaned out my linen closet.

I was amazed at the sheets I found that we no longer had beds to fit, including crib sheets and twin sheets adorned with princesses and dump trucks!

With two kids in college who demand twin XL sheets in all cotton and two in high school who can’t get enough of the jersey ones, I was bittersweetly reminded of how life has moved on, but I’m loving my clean closet nonetheless.

STEPHANIE BE AT TY, WHITEF ISH BAY, WISCONSIN

I refinished the midcenturymodern dining table that had been sitting in our garage for the past three years.

I’d bought it on Craigslist one day while pregnant, but I could never find the energy for such a project while I took care of four kids. I did the research on using Danish oil and took a huge leap of faith while I sanded and stripped it, and it turned out beautifully!

TATYANA MARTSENYUK , MERIDIAN, IDAHO

I finally went through all my jewelry.

I sold the gold and silver that I wasn’t wearing to a local jewelry store. I felt really good donating costume jewelry to a local beading group that refashions jewelry for disadvantaged teens who are going to prom.

SHERRY HATCHER, SAN ANTONIO

Curating our bookshelf!

We rem ove d s o m e books to make space for framed photos and display-wor thy knickknacks. @ S O C I A L LY F O X

J U N E 2017

24

THE REALIST

Yo u r W o r d s What long-procrastinated task did you finally cross off your list?

For my 90th birthday, I got my long-desired ankle tattoo of a beautiful butterfly on a lavender daisy.

Yes, friends and family gasped.

I love it!

Throwing away all those unmatched socks.

I kept them around thinking I would someday match pairs and feel frugal and mindful. But they were clutter and a constant reminder of imperfectness. Releasing myself of those little frayed pieces of unmatched cloth made me smile.

JEN WORTH, DERWOOD, MARYL AND

JOYCE BL ADES, BALTIMORE

I had several seams in my leather couch that needed to be repaired.

I knew if I got upholstery needle and thread, I could fix it myself. It is a slow and tedious task, but I am almost finished with the repairs.

J U N E 2017

I was raised in California and have always loved the ocean and being in the water. I certainly knew how to swim well enough to stay afloat, but not much more.

When I grew older and moved to Maine, I was embarrassed about flailing around and how I looked in a bathing suit. But this winter, I signed up for adult swimming lessons. It hasn’t taken long to learn some basic skills that make me feel much more at ease in the water and, surprisingly, also more comfortable with my body.

#WOMENIRL

@ S TA R T H A R P I N G S AY S O F T H I S S H O T, “ S O H A P P Y I S P E N T MY FREE TIME ORGANIZING THE KIDS’ C LOT H E S BY S E A S O N A N D S I Z E . ”

Finding a doctor in my new hometown.

ANNA B., ST. LOUIS

I’d had the same doctors since childhood, but when I married, I moved hours away. I let my prescriptions expire and went way too long without checkups. I studied my insurance plan, learned about eligible providers, and called several offices before I found the best fit for me. I’m so proud of being proactive about my health!

Cleaning out my spice cabinet.

AMY CROSL IN WRIGHT, LOUISVILLE, KENTUCKY

DE IDRE HA AGE BL ACK , TUCSON, ARI ZONA

I finally invested my Roth IRA. For two years, I was putting money in but never told my financial adviser how to invest it, which meant it really wasn’t earning any gains.

The women behind the Instagram accounts featured here will receive a set of Real Simple’s new cleaning products.

Get 20 percent off at realsimpleclean.com until June 30, 2017, with the code J U N EEDI TO R .

I learned to swim.

Instead of two very cluttered shelves, I have one organized shelf.

(No one needs three jars of ground mustard!)

MARY HANSON CULLEN, MEDFORD, WISCONSIN

LESL IE GOODE, BLUE HILL , MA INE

UPCOMING QUEST ION How do you turn around a bad day?

Go to realsimple .com/yourwords and let us know your answer to this question.

Your response could appear on these pages.

Shredding junk mail that’s piled up!

M A U R A F I T Z G E R A L D , B R O O K LY N , N E W Y O R K

©2017 Pepperidge Farm, Incorporated.

$ 1(: &22.,( 675$,*+7 )520

%DFN LQ RXU IRXQGHU 0DUJDUHW 5XGNLQ SXW KHU IDLWK LQ VLPSOH NLWFKHQ SDQWU\ LQJUHGLHQWV :H VWLOO GR WRGD\ 5HDO FKRFRODWH FUHDPHU\ EXWWHU DQG FDJH IUHH HJJV PDNH RXU 3HSSHULGJH )DUP )DUPKRXVH70 7KLQ &ULVS\ FRRNLHV VLPSO\ GHOLFLRXV $YDLODEOH LQ 0LON 'DUN DQG 7ULSOH &KRFRODWH

26 Great for book club

The Short List F I V E B O O K S T H AT W O N ’ T D I S A P P O I N T

In The Gypsy Moth Summer, a prodigal daughter of Avalon Island’s most powerful white family returns with her African-American husband and their children to a community divided by race and social class. With vivid imagery, Julia Fierro immerses readers in this fractured world and the irreversible consequences of the daughter’s return.

Delicious explainer Why does eating off a blue plate make food taste saltier?

Charles Spence has set out to explain how our eating experience affects our meals. In Gastrophysics: The New Science of Eating, Spence explores the sensory research that proves the environment we eat in can transform how we taste our food.

Riveting memoir Souad Mekhennet has reported on some of the most wanted terrorist organizations in the world. In I Was Told to Come Alone: My Journey Behind the Lines of Jihad, she brings the reader along on her harrowing travels through war-torn corners of the world, giving a human face to people often lost behind the headlines.

Fun summer read An estranged family flies en masse to London for a wedding complete with fancy hotels and trendy restaurants. What could possibly go wrong?

Grant Ginder’s The People We Hate at the Wedding hilariously brings to life the troubles of families that are stuck together, for better or worse.

You may relate.

In this memoir, published posthumously, Nina Riggs asks: How do you make life meaningful when you know your time is limited? With humor and honesty, The Bright Hour: A Memoir of Living and Dying chronicles Riggs’s diagnosis of metastatic breast cancer and the moments shared with her school-age sons and her husband before her death at age 39.

For more book recommendations, visit realsimple.com/books.

J U N E 2017

T E X T B Y N O R A H O R VAT H

P H O T O G R A P H B Y M AT T H E W Z A C H

PROP ST YL ING BY JOJO L I

Tissues required

When was the last time we did something for the first time?

If we go looking, we just might find that we can still surprise ourselves.

Get the guide at Co olora ado.c com

See Beautiful Design

Do Beautiful Work

The new Zura™ Pendant Showerhead combines stunning design with the innovative H2Okinetic® wave pattern to create a powerfully drenching shower unlike any other.

See the full range of what Delta can do at deltafaucet.com.

29 EVERYTHING OUR EDI TORS ARE BUZ Z ING AB OUT THIS MONTH

what we love DI Y P L A N T HANGER RECAPTURE THE not-a-care-in-theworld sensation you had at summer camp with this modernized macramé kit. Follow the easy instructions to create a plant hanger from soft jersey yarn in under an hour.

PROP ST YL ING BY JOJO L I

TO BUY:

WRITTEN BY STEPHANIE SISCO

P H O T O G R A P H B Y M AT T H E W Z A C H

$25; woolandthegang.com.

W H AT W E L O V E

STARTING JUNE 30, the Seattle Art Museum will host a special exhibition featuring 65 years’ worth of Kusama’s installations― a sensory extravaganza. It will then travel to Los Angeles, Ontario, and Cleveland over the next year. Follow along using #InfiniteKusama.

THIS ANNUAL 5K FUNDRAISER BENEFITS DRESS FOR SUCCESS, WHICH SUPPORTS WOMEN AS THEY WORK TO BECOME FINANCIALLY SELFSUFFICIENT. GO TO DRESSFORSUCCESS .ORG TO FIND OUT WHEN THE WALK COMES TO A CITY NEAR YOU OR HOW YOU CAN DONATE.

more to love

THE POWER WA L K F O R DRESS FOR SUCCESS

THE INAUGURAL EVENT will take place at Sterling Vineyards in Napa Valley on June 24, showcasing wines from some of the nation’s top rosé producers. Want in on the fun but can’t make it to California? Pick up a bottle of 2016 Sterling Vintner’s Collection Rosé ($12; sterlingvineyards.com for info) to get a taste of the experience.

WONDER WOMAN

IN THEATERS JUNE 2, this Warner Bros. flick will satisfy everyone in your household with epic battle scenes and showstopping World War I–era costumes.

J U N E 2017

ROSÉ FEST

Q UA R T E R L A N E

BUSY BOOK LOVERS, THIS IS FOR YOU: SUBSCRIBE TO HAVE THE MOST TALKED-ABOUT SEASONAL FICTION DELIVERED TO YOUR DOOR. EACH BOX INCLUDES AT LEAST THREE BOOKS, ALONG WITH A PIECE OF CUSTOM ART AND A SMALL GIFT. CHOOSE FROM THREE SUBSCRIPTION OPTIONS, DEPENDING ON HOW OFTEN YOU WANT TO RECEIVE THE PACKAGES. TO BUY: FROM $85 PER BOX; QUARTER LANEBOOKS.COM.

YAYO I KU S A M A : INFINITY MIRRORS

L’ O F F I C I N E UNIVERSELLE B U LY L A I T N E T T OYA N T

TAKING OFF MAKEUP has never felt quite so luxurious. Cornflower water and argan oil leave skin super supple, while the 19th-century Parisian packaging of this cleansing milk is a treat for the eyes. TO BUY: $57; at Bergdorf Goodman.

R O S É F E S T : C O U R T E S Y O F S T E R L I N G V I N E YA R D S ( 2 ) ; K U S A M A : C O U R T E S Y O F O TA F I N E A R T S T O K Y O / S I N G A P O R E , V I C T O R I A M I R O L O N D O N , D AV I D Z W I R N E R N E W Y O R K , © YAY O I K U S A M A ( P H O T O G R A P H B Y E I K O H H O S O E ) ; C O R N F L O W E R S : I S T O C K P H O T O / G E T T Y I M A G E S ( 5 ) ; B U LY L A I T N E T T O YA N T : J E F F W E S T B R O O K ; W O N D E R W O M A N : C L AY E N O S / D C C O M I C S

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©2017 P&G

VISIBLE RESULTS INVISIBLE FEEL OLAY ULTRA MOISTURE BODY WASH Infuses skin with NEW Lock-In-MoistureTM without leaving a coated feel. Clean, smooth skin that feels truly naked.

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W H AT W E L O V E

Quick ideas

The Staple It’s time for d i l l p i c k l e s to come out of hiding―from underneath your burger bun or tucked next to your turkey wrap. Let the spears take a stab at the spotlight! Chop them up and, much like capers, they’ll add savory zest to salad dressing, compound butter (that’s just butter with mix-ins), and even pan sauce. We love Claussen Kosher Dill Spears for their crisp crunch and balanced salty flavor; find them in the refrigerated section at the grocery store. Better stock up―it’s still pretty tempting to eat them straight from the jar.

1 PIC K L E C O M P O U N D BU T T ER

Pulse cup softened butter, 3 Tbsp. chopped pickles, 1 Tbsp. chopped parsley, 1 clove chopped garlic, and tsp. each lemon zest, kosher salt, and black pepper in a food processor until mostly smooth.

Refrigerate for up to 2 weeks.

Makes cup.

2 DI L LY BU T T E R M I L K DRESSING

Process cup each buttermilk and mayonnaise, 6 Tbsp. chopped pickles, 2 Tbsp. chopped dill, and tsp. each kosher salt and black pepper in a food processor until smooth.

Makes 1 cups.

Cook 4 chicken cutlets in oil in a large skillet until cooked through; remove.

Add 1 chopped shallot and 2 Tbsp. chopped pickles; cook for 1 minute. Add cup chicken broth and cook until reduced by half. Whisk in 4 Tbsp. butter until melted; spoon over cutlets and garnish with chopped parsley.

Serves 4.

WRITTEN BY H E AT H G O L D M A N RECIPES BY KAREN RANKIN

J U N E 2017

P H O T O G R A P H B Y M AT T H E W Z A C H

PROP ST YL ING BY JOJO L I

3 C H IC K E N P IC K L E P IC CATA

WELCOME TO THE TEA HOUSE. PREMIUM ORGANIC TEA. EXQUISITE INGREDIENTS. EXTRAORDINARY TASTE. Also available in these flavors: Sicilian Lemon & Honeysuckle

• Valencia Orange Peel • Wild Blackberry & Sage

©2017 PURE LEAF and TEA HOUSE COLLECTION are trademarks of the Unilever Group of Companies used under license.

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W H AT W E L O V E

1 S C H O O LWO R K S C RA P B O O K

6 SOCK W RA N G L ER

Lost socks, you’ve met your match. This bungee-style gadget keeps 10 pairs together for washing and drying. Use one organizer for each family member and never sort socks again.

TO BUY: SockDock, $20 for 2; sockdock.com.

Endless boxes of kid creativity? This service binds favorites into a hardcover book. Pocket dividers hold mementos (like lunch box notes).

TO BUY: 4-Ever Bound, from $50; 4everbound.com.

Little Helpers

2 D RY B R U S H CLEANER

Sanitize natural and synthetic makeup brushes fast sans water or soap with this cleansing spray.

Spritz the bristles (they won’t feel damp), then stroke the brush on a clean towel.

TO BUY: Pure Brush, $20; pure-brush.com.

6 SMART PRODUCTS

5

3

GLASS-CLEANING C LOT H

D O G - WA S H I N G WA N D

This washable microfiber cloth polishes away smudges, dirt, and water spots without scratching. Just dampen with water (no need for cleaner!).

TO BUY: Casabella microfiber glass cloth, $5 for 2; containerstore.com.

JUNE 2017

4 HANDHELD PA I N T P A I L

Easily hold a quart of paint or stain in this container with an adjustable hand strap.

A built-in magnet keeps a brush or roller in place.

TO BUY: Handy Pro Pail, $13, and liners, $5.50 for 4; amazon.com.

This clever wand attaches to a showerhead or spigot and creates a comblike spray to thoroughly rinse Rover. Use the pause mode to stop the water flow when it’s time to lather up.

TO BUY: Waterpik Pet Wand Pro, $49; amazon.com.

WRITTEN BY BRANDI BROXSON

P H OTO G R A P H S BY J E F F W E ST B R O O K

TO G E T I T D O N E

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W H AT W E L O V E

PRETTY SMART

Pretty Smar t

Blush & Glow

PROP ST YL ING BY JOJO L I

A believable b r o n z e r is hard to come by. Some are too light (why bother?); some are too heavy (ew, Oompa Loompa). Lancôme Belle de Teint Bronzer and Blush Palette ($45; lancome-usa .com) is just right: two tones of bronzer for warmth and definition, plus two blushes for a healthy flush. Swirl all over your face and collarbone for balanced, beautiful color―without a vacation.

JUNE 2017

W R I T T E N B Y H E AT H E R M U I R M A F F E I

P H O T O G R A P H B Y M AT T H E W Z A C H

1

2

1 ST. T R O P E Z S E L F TA N E X P R E S S B R O N Z I N G FAC E SHEET MASK 6

Leave on for 5 to 15 minutes, depending on how dark a tan you want, then peel off, massage in the residue, and in eight hours streak-free color will appear.

TO BUY: $9; sephora.com.

3

Swipe, then press lips together for bold, semimatte color that stays all day. In 16 shades.

TO BUY: $28 each; bobbibrown cosmetics.com.

7 S T. T R O P E Z M A S K : S H A N A N O VA K ; R E M A I N I N G P R O D U C T S : J E F F W E S T B R O O K

2 B O B B I B R OW N A RT ST IC K L IQ U I D L I P

3 PACIFIC SHAVING SINGLEUSE SHAVING CREAM MINIS Genius for travel, these water-soluble pods form a luxe lather so you get a great shave anywhere.

TO BUY: $8 for 40 shaves; pacific shaving.com.

5

4 AVEDA PRAMASANA SCALP CLEANSER

ment removes buildup with wintergreen-derived salicylic acid.

TO BUY: $35; aveda.com.

5 P H I LO S O P H Y RENEWED HOPE IN A JA R S K I N T I N T The water gel hydrates skin while the elastomers and pigments blur the look of lines. In five shades.

TO BUY: $39; sephora.com.

6 FRAGRANCE WI TH BENEF I TS NOMO E AU FRAÎCHE With the look and scent of a fancy fragrance―Sicilian lemon and French lavender―and the benefits of insect repellent, this spray is key for outdoor parties.

TO BUY: $85; fragrance-with -benefits.com.

7 FRESH ROSE D E E P H Y D RAT IO N FACI A L TO N E R Stressed skin?

This rosewater and hyaluronic acid tonic soothes dry patches and redness.

TO BUY: $44; fresh.com.

Like Altoids for your scalp, this preshampoo treat4

J U N E 2017

38

W H AT W E L O V E

My Favorite Piece LOS ANGELES DESIGNER Ke l l y We a r s t l e r S H E D S L IG H T O N T H E

A C C E S S O R Y S H E A D O R E S M O S T. M Y TA B L E L A M P by artist Jacques DuvalBrasseur looks like an abstract flower made of mixed metals, with stainless-steel petals and a curved bronze base. It’s a limited design from the 1970s that I fell in love with when I first saw it in vintage magazines, but it was expensive and rare. Then, about four years ago at a flea market in Paris, I saw the lamp peeking out at me from one of the stands. I brought it home and put it on the desk in my oice so I could enjoy it every day. Nearly two years ago, I moved it onto a console in my dining room.

It doesn’t give of a lot of light but rather glows, so we keep it on all the time to light the way to the kitchen. A lamp like this may not be highly functional, but with a distinctive shape and a warm glow, it gives a room a sexy vibe. It makes me happy to look at it. As with any art form, there are sculptural lamps that will resonate with just about everyone. You just need to go treasure hunting and seek one out!

J U N E 2017

F LO RA L

L AY E R E D

Dahlia pillar tea-light-holder set, $25; cb2.com.

Tiered-shade table lamp, $149; westelm.com.

G EO M E T R IC

U LT RA G L A M

Haley lamp, $250; jaysonhome.com.

Garvey lamp, $840; arteriorshome.com.

WE ARSTLER: NICK HUDSON; L AMP S: COURTESY OF VENDORS

GET THE LOOK

Her science camp, his playdate, your family reunion.

No sweat.

With everything you need in one shared place, Cozi helps your family avoid summer meltdowns.

Shared Family Calendar Shopping & To Do Lists Meals & Recipe Box

Plan the perfect summer with Cozi, the #1 family organizing app!

BONUS: Join now & get the 2017 Summer Planner at cozi.com/plan-your-summer

P R O P ST Y L I N G BY M EG U M I E M OTO F O R A N D E R S O N H O P K I N S . H E I DI K L E I N CA P R I S CA L LO P B A LC O N Y B I K I N I , $ 2 8 0 ; H E I DI K L E I N . C O M

U N C O M M O N S O L U T I O N S T O E V E R Y D AY P R O B L E M S

the realist

41

H OW TO CA R E F O R YO U R SWIMSUIT THE TRICK TO keeping your summer MVP in tip-top shape starts before you even set foot in a pool, says swimsuit designer Heidi Klein. “Prior to swimming, saturate the suit with fresh water, which will make it more difficult for damaging chlorine to soak in,” she says. When you get home, turn the suit inside out and hand-wash in cold water with a mild detergent meant for delicates (try Delicate Wash, $19; thelaundress.com). Then lay it on a flat surface to dry. Give your suit a day off before wearing it again to ensure that it returns to its sleek shape.

Get five expert tips for finding the perfect bathing suit at realsimple.com/swim.

WRITTEN BY BRANDI BROXSON

PHOTOGRAPH BY CLAIRE BENOIST

J U N E 2017

46

THE REALIST

Things Cooks Know S T R AT E G I E S , T E C H N I Q U E S , AND TIPS―FROM THE RE AL SIMPLE TEST K I TC H EN TO YO U R S

ABOUT FROZEN PRODUCE

ABOUT CORN KERNELS

How to Freeze Fresh Summer Produce Freezing is great for those times when you overpurchase at the farmers’ market—and way easier than canning.

Follow these steps and ta-da: sweet summer peaches (and snap peas and strawberries) in the middle of January.

1. Wash and prepare produce however you plan to use it (slice stone fruit and melon, pit cherries, trim green beans). Blanch and shock veggies; let dry.

2. Freeze items in a single layer on a parchment-lined baking sheet to prevent clumping. Once the produce is frozen, pack it into freezer bags, squeezing out excess air, and return to freezer.

(It’ll taste best if you use it within one year.)

J U N E 2017

PRO TIP! All fruit will be soft when it defrosts― great for topping pancakes, not for fruit salad― but packing it in sugar syrup keeps it firmer. Mix 3 cups sugar with 4 cups lukewarm water until clear.

Chill, then pour over washed and prepped fruit in a freezer bag, just until covered.

Freeze.

Go to realsimple.com/ freeze for how long you can store (almost) anything in the freezer.

We asked Nicholas Coleman, the “oleologist” (that’s an olive oil‒tasting expert) from Grove and Vine, for his tips on selecting a good one. First thing: Ignore the color. Evaluate on smell and taste alone. If the store doesn’t let you sample, you may have to endure some trial and error at home. Freshly pressed olive oil will have a plethora of aromas, from cut grass to almonds to tomato vines.

Avoid oil that smells like wax, wine, or vinegar. Opt for extra-virgin, which has passed both a chemical and a sensory test, and avoid “light” olive oil― typically a blend of inferior and virgin olive oils. Store in a cool, dark place away from the stove, and be sure to use within three months of opening.

No More Flying Kernels!

A smarter way to cut them off the cob. Finally.

Shuck corn, removing all the silk from the cobs.

ST EP 1

ST EP 2 Lay cob flat on a cutting board and cut kernels from one side.

WRITTEN BY GRACE ELKUS

ST EP 3 Rotate a quarter turn so cut side is flat on the board; repeat with three other sides.

PHOTOGRAPHS BY COREY OLSEN

F O O D ST Y L I N G BY H E AT H G O L D M A N ; P R O P ST Y L I N G BY A N G EL A CA M P O S ; I L LU ST R AT IO N S BY J O E M C K EN D RY

Choosing the Best Olive Oil ABOUT OLIVE OIL

the perfect smile is

bright

& strong.

Cleans Repairs Strengthens Enamel Safely Whitens with Baking Soda SWITCH TO ARM & HAMMER™ TRULY RADIANT™. Check out our full product line at TrulyRadiant.com

THE REALIST

49

Does It Really Work?

T H E S E S E L F - TA N N E R S P R O M I S E T H E M O S T B E L I E VA B L E B R O N Z E F R O M A B O T T L E .

W E D I D T H E L E G W O R K T O F I N D O U T.

1

2

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JA M E S R E A D C O C O N U T M E LT I N G TA N N I N G B A L M

ST. T R O P E Z S E L F TA N E X P R E S S B R O N Z I N G M I ST

TA N - LUXE H Y D RA M O U S S E

With organic coconut oil and DHA (the sugar that reacts with proteins in skin to create color), this clear balm smooths on like butter and gives you a streak-free tan in eight hours, no rinsing required.

EXPERT TAKE: “It smelled sweet, more like Almond Joy than coconut, but it’s subtle,” says Anna Stankiewicz, a celebrity spray-tan artist in New York City. “It’s hard to know if you’re rubbing it in evenly— use the sheen as your guide.

Wait 20 minutes before getting dressed, since it takes time to absorb. It took two applications before I noticed color, which is typical of gradual formulas.”

BOTTOM LINE: If you have dry skin and want a natural, buildable tan, this is your balm.

TO BUY: $35; net-a-porter.com.

The company’s fastest formula now comes in a mist with a nozzle you can spray at any angle (even upside down). Leave it on for one to three hours, depending on your desired color, then rinse. Eight hours later, you’ll have a tan.

EXPERT TAKE: “When spraying it, you have to keep moving the can to prevent splotches and use a blending mitt to avoid streaks,” says Stankiewicz.

“I like that you see the color as you’re applying it, so you don’t miss any spots. I left it on for three hours before rinsing, and in eight hours, I had a natural-looking tan.”

BOTTOM LINE: If you can’t stand the lingering smell or feeling of lotions, this mist gives results—but you need to be meticulous when applying.

TO BUY: $40; sephora.com.

T H E L I C E N S I N G P R O J E C T. C O M ; P R O D U C T S : C O U R T E S Y O F M A N U F A C T U R E R S

THE CLAIM:

W R I T T E N B Y H E AT H E R M U I R M A F F E I

THE CLAIM:

PHOTOGRAPH BY CLAIRE BENOIST

Available in light to medium and medium to dark, this clear whipped foam packs nourishing raspberry seed oil and vitamins B5, C, and E and delivers a believable glow in four to six hours. (You can shower after four.)

EXPERT TAKE: “It has a slight grapefruit scent and is easy to apply. Mousse is my favorite formula because it blends into the skin evenly,” says Stankiewicz. “It dries quickly; I was able to get dressed in two minutes. In about seven hours, I noticed a subtle glow one shade darker than my natural, fair skin tone. It took a few applications to develop a darker tan.”

BOTTOM LINE: If you’re a selftanning novice, a foam is the most foolproof way to prevent orange zebra streaks.

TO BUY: $54; tan-luxe.com.

THE CLAIM:

J U N E 2017

©2016 P&G

EYES THAT WON’T SHOW YOUR AGE Olay Eyes. A collection to fight the look of every eye concern: Brighten, Depuff, Li , Smooth, or Ultimately, all of it. #AGELESS

ADVERTISEMENT

DEEPICA MUTYALA ON

WHY IT WORKS On-air beauty expert Deepica Mutyala launched her social media channel to make beauty more accessible. She now shares her trusted tips and tricks with a legion of loyal fans.

Deepica always knew that she wanted to work in the beauty industry to help women feel more confident. When her tutorial for eliminating dark under eye circles went viral, she quit her job to devote herself to her social media channel full-time.

Followers regularly ask for her number one beauty tip. “I tell them to take care of their skin,” she says. “That includes getting enough rest, staying hydrated, and focusing on the most important part of the face: the eyes. Dark circles can really age you before your time. An easy way to take age of is to tighten and hydrate the skin around the eyes.”

“The first time I used it, I was surprised that I immediately noticed a lifting and plumping of my skin.”

Deepica relies on Olay Eye Lifting Serum to do just that.

“The first time I used it, I was surprised that I immediately noticed a lifting and plumping of my skin,” she says. “And the results continued to improve after two weeks. I now use it every morning and night!”

THE DETAILS DEEPICA’S PICK Olay Eye Lifting Serum is formulated with advanced amino-peptide complex to hydrate and firm the skin around the eyes in just two weeks.

HOW TO USE Apply morning and night on cleansed skin along the whole eye area, including the brow, outer corners, and under the eye. Smooth until completely absorbed.

THE REALIST

55

Organize This Y O U R j u n k d r a w e r D O E S N ’ T H AV E T O L O O K , W E L L , J U N K Y. P R O O R G A N I Z E R B E T H P E N N S H A R E S T H E K E Y S T O A S M A R T E R S E T U P. 1 MODULAR MIX Acrylic bins let you Tetris a drawer to max out the space. Add some fun with a few creative “containers,” like a doughnut eraser to hold pushpins.

TO BUY: Linus organizers, from $3 each; containerstore.com.

Desk doughnut eraser, $10; papersource.com.

1 2

2 R EC E I P T WRANGLER Use a small pouch to keep all those little papers (plus coupons) from taking over. It holds about a week’s worth; when it’s full, it’s time to toss the ones you no longer need.

TO BUY: Snap pouch, $1; containerstore.com.

3

4

3 B I RT H DAY K I T

6

PROP ST YL ING BY RANDI BROOKMAN HARRIS

5

Corral candles, matches, and spare balloons in one spot and—voilà—you’re that pulled-together person who’s always party-ready.

4 P O P O F PAT T E R N A decorative background (like adhesive wallpaper) makes this spot instantly look better. The pretty print is your keep-it-neat prompt every time you open the drawer.

TO BUY: Misty Marble removable wallpaper, $40 per panel; chasingpaper.com.

5 GRAB-AND-GO ROW The front section is prime real estate, so save it for the items you reach for most often: hand lotion, bandages, paper clips, lip balm. If you designate that part of the drawer as your essentials area, you’ll be less likely to jam it up with random stuff.

6 D R O P ZO N E Leave a little open space for storing oddshaped items (scissors, rubber-band ball) and miscellaneous ones (twine for newspaper bundling, ribbon for rushed wrapping jobs).

Ready to revitalize the other drawers in your space? Find more organizational tips at realsimple.com/drawers.

PHOTOGRAPH BY ALPHA SMOOT

J U N E 2017

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THE REALIST

2

R U N WAY I N S P I R AT IO N Models at the Alice + Olivia Spring/Summer 2017 Presentation showed off the look: lilac on lids and purple on outer corners and lower lash lines.

1 G I L D YO U R L I D S

Pret ty Practical

Prep your eyelids with a dab of concealer. It will neutralize any discoloration and double as primer, giving shadow something to adhere to (no creasing or fading).

Dip a brush into a copper shadow, like NYX Prismatic Shadow in Liquid Gold ($6; nyx cosmetics.com), and apply it to the middle of the lid, sweeping it toward the inner corner of your eye.

Ombré Eyes O N E T W E A K TO YO U R E YE - S H A D OW P L AC EM EN T W I L L MAKE YO UR W H O L E F A C E L I G H T U P. F O L L O W THESE THREE E ASY STEPS.

For makeup tips customized to your eye shape, visit realsimple .com/eyeshape.

J U N E 2017

WRI T TEN BY L ISA DESANT IS

Unlike a traditional smoky eye (lighter shade on the lid, darker in the crease), this twotone technique puts lighter shadow on the inner half of the lid and crease and darker on the outer (lightening inner corners makes eyes pop).

Using a chocolate shadow―try L’Oréal Paris Colour Riche Eyeshadow in Quartz Fume ($6; target.com)―blend from the outer corner of your eye toward the center, stopping where colors meet.

3 WAV E A M AG IC WA N D

Since there’s no eyeliner involved (woo-hoo!), adding definition with mascara on top and bottom lashes is key. Any mascara will get the job done, but we love Julep With a Twist Mascara ($22; ulta .com), which has an adjustable wand.

Use as is for volume or twist the dial, which extends the brush for more precision and length.

P H O T O G R A P H B Y M O L LY C R A N N A

TO P L EF T P H OTO G R A P H : M A K EU P BY K AT I E JA N E H U G H E S U S I N G L A N C Ô M E ; H A I R BY JA S O N M U R I L LO AT K AT E RYA N I N C. U S I N G K E V I N M U RP H Y; ST Y L I N G BY R O M I N A H ER R ER A M A L AT E STA AT S EE M A N AG EM EN T; E A R R I N G S BY N E T T I E K EN T; D R E S S BY K A R O L I N E L A N G ; RU N WAY I N S PI R AT IO N P H OTO G R A P H BY A ST R I D STAW I A R Z / ST R I N G ER / G E T T Y I M AG E S ; ST I L L L I F E S BY J EF F W E ST B R O O K .

T H R OW S H A D E

© 2017 Time Inc. MONEY is a trademark of Time Inc., registered in the U.S. and other countries.

No Heavy Perfumes, Aerosols, or Dyes

WITH

Refills Available

No Heavy Perfumes

For Fabric & Air

©2017 P&G

59

THE REALIST

Now What?!?

Smar t solutions FOR L IFE’S L IT TLE DISASTERS

My wedding ring went down the sink drain!

R.T., VI A EMA IL

Stop running the water immediately to prevent flushing the ring farther into the pipes.

Then locate the U-shaped pipe under the sink. “It’s called the P trap and is likely holding your ring,” says Scott Archibald, manager of The Pink Plumber in Atlanta. Place a bowl under the pipe to catch any water; then, using your hands or a medium pair of pliers, remove the pipe fittings.

If the ring is not in the pipe, try sucking it out with a wet vac (place the vacuum hose in the pipe under the sink that goes to the sewer).

If that doesn’t work, call a plumber.

THE FIX:

Something bubbled over in the oven.

E.E., VI A EMA IL

Once the oven has cooled, remove any loose debris with a brush. Then, to soften stuck-on gunk, place a sponge on top of the burned spot and pour a little boiling water over it, says Donna Smallin Kuper, a certified housecleaning technician and the author of Cleaning Plain & Simple. Remove the sponge and repeat to treat other dirty spots.

Make a paste with a little hot water and a few tablespoons of baking soda, apply to the spots with the wet sponge, and let it sit overnight.

In the a.m., pour a little more boiling water on top and use a scrubby sponge to loosen any remaining gunk. Last step: Add a sheet of aluminum foil to the bottom of the oven to catch any future spills.

GBRUNDIN/GET T Y IMAGES

THE FIX:

Have a crisis that needs solving? Email your problem to askrealsimple@ realsimple.com.

WRITTEN BY BRANDI BROXSON

I have a painful blemish on my eyebrow.

$:$< 2'256 :,7+

D.H., VI A EMA IL

If you recently had your eyebrows waxed or tweezed, it could be an ingrown hair, says Janet Prystowsky, a dermatologist in New York City and the founder of the skin-care line Livad. Try tweezing out the hair, then apply a pimple cream that contains salicylic acid (avoid benzoyl peroxide, as it might bleach brows). If it looks more like a red bump with no visible whitehead, it’s probably a papule, says Renée Rouleau, an aesthetician based in Austin, Texas. To treat, apply ice to decrease inflammation and redness. Then apply cortisone cream to help with the pain. Keep hands off the area to avoid infection.

THE FIX:

J U N E 2017

1R +HDY\ 3HUIXPHV

k 3 *

60

THE REALIST

R o a d Te s t

Sunscreen OUT OF 60 TESTED, THESE HEROES HAD OUR B AC K S ( A N D L EG S A N D FAC E S ) .

1

scars, this waterresistant balm is a beach bag essential.

TO BUY: $16; aveneusa.com.

6

4 B E ST LOT IO N Isdin Eryfotona Actinica Ultralight Emulsion SPF 50+

1 B E ST C O M PACT Amorepacific Sun Protection Cushion SPF 30+

5 B E ST T I N T

Press the puff onto your face and neck for weightless protection; toss it into your bag for midday touch-ups.

TO BUY: $40; sephora.com.

2 B E ST S P RAY Kate Somerville Uncomplikated SPF 50 Makeup Setting Spray

realsimple

ROAD TE ST

In three shades, this formula creates a waterrepellent layer so you can sweat and stay protected.

TO BUY: $38; shiseido.com.

6 B E ST P R I M E R

A mist that won’t mess up your makeup or add shine. Spritz eight inches away from your skin.

4

Shiseido Sports BB Broad Spectrum SPF 50+

TO BUY: $38;

sephora.com.

Coola Dawn Patrol Primer SPF 30 Think of it as cucumber-scented, invisible, undermakeup sun armor.

(Pow!) TO BUY: $42; coolasuncare.com.

3 B E ST ST IC K Avène Sunscreen Balm SPF 50+ Ideal for nose, ears, lips, eyes, and even

For sunscreen mistakes even smart people make, go to realsimple.com/SPF.

3

J U N E 2017

WRITTEN BY CHELSEA TRABER BURNS

P H O T O G R A P H B Y S H A N A N O VA K

PROP ST YL ING BY RACHEL ST ICKLEY FOR BERNSTE IN & ANDRIULL I

2

5

This zinc oxide sunscreen contains photolyase enzymes that help repair existing sun damage.

TO BUY: $50; isdin .com/us.

miracle leave-in product perfect hair begins with healthy hair

h a i r c a r e

After 20 years behind the chair, there’s not a hair type I haven’t touched... No product met my standards. I then created my Miracle Leave-In product that does 10 miraculous things in 1. It’s the third step to every woman’s morning routine. It’s a 10 Haircare... Always a 10 and sees no color. Pick your flavor!

Carolyn Aronson, CEO, It’s a 10 Haircare

itsa10haircare.com

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2 1

Trend to Tr y 3

Bold Stripes GET IN LINE FOR THIS FRESH TA K E O N A C L A S S I C T R E N D : P A R T R E T R O , PA R T R E F I N E D .

1 KNIT TEE An unexpected color combo lends a sophisticated air to this lightweight top.

TO BUY: Striped top, $60; anntaylor.com.

6

2 BA N D E D BA N G L E S 5

4

3 S P O RT Y S ATC H E L A roomy tote embellished with a racing-inspired emblem holds all the essentials.

TO BUY: Simple tote, $495; clarev.com.

4 F L A S H Y F O OT W E A R Eye-catching slides toe the line between laid-back and fashion-forward.

TO BUY: Sedona espadrilles, $99; kaanas.com.

5 SW I N GY S K I RT

Elevate your ensembles with even more striped styles (all under $100!) at realsimple .com/stripes.

Ultra-flattering, thanks to leglengthening vertical stripes.

TO BUY: Tech-Knit pinstripe skirt, $250; torysport.com.

6 C L A S S IC S H E AT H Summer-ready sailor stripes in a crisp silhouette you can dress up or down.

TO BUY: Martha dress, $150; bodenusa.com.

J U N E 2017

W R I T T E N B Y R E B E C C A D A LY

PHOTOGRAPHS BY PHILIP FRIEDMAN

S O F T ST Y L I N G BY M A I T R A N ; TO P L EF T P H OTO G R A P H BY M A R C O L A M B ERTO / E Y EEM / G E T T Y I M AG E S

These graphic bracelets add ’60s appeal to a simple shift.

TO BUY: Vibe large, $128, and small bangle, $98; furla.com.

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THE REALIST

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Real Simplifier

How to Train for a Triathlon 1 PICK THE RIGHT RACE For your first race, opt for a sprint triathlon, which is half the length of the standard Olympic distance, says Ryan Bolton, founder of the Santa Fe coaching group Bolton Endurance Sports Training. And if possible, “sign up for an all-women race, which often has a lot of first-timers,” says Dana Anello White, USA Triathlon Level 1 coach.

First-timer? Follow these essential tips from the pros.

4 SWIM, A LOT Becoming efficient in the water can save you time and energy for the rest of your race. But it can be hard to teach yourself proper swimming technique, says White. To master your form, look to your local Y for triathlonlevel lessons with a coach.

5 GET READY FOR THE BIG DAY The best way to prep is to watch a race from the sidelines. Also, practice transitions to make sure you can unzip your wet suit on the run and switch your shoes when your legs are like Jell-O. Attend the pre-event meeting (often held the day before) to get tips about the course.

2 TRAIN FOR 3 TO 5 MONTHS You’ll need at least 12 weeks to prepare, but 20 is ideal for your first triathlon. Following an online training program is easy and relatively affordable, but if you need more flexibility, work with a coach to personalize your program.

3 GEAR UP No need for a pricey racing bike―a hybrid will work fine.

Running shoes, a helmet, sunglasses, good goggles, bike shoes, and a wet suit are also on the must-have list. Try everything out well before the race, especially the wet suit, says Christine Giacopelli, a mother of two in Ridgewood, New Jersey, who recently completed her first triathlon.

6 FINISH STRONG You did it! Stretch afterward to prevent soreness, then “hydrate, eat, and party,” says Giacopelli.

W R I T T E N B Y K AT H L E E N M U R R AY H A R R I S

I L L U S T R AT I O N S B Y J A N N E I I V O N E N

J U N E 2017

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INDUSTRY-BEST WARRANTIES covers all parts and in-home labor.

THE REALIST

The Right Gift for Everyone F R E S H I D E A S TO D EL IG H T H O STS , DA D S ,

69

Handmade napkins From a company renowned for its handcrafted and universally loved aprons come these linencotton beauties for your table. Napkins, $12.50 each; hedley andbennett.com.

Statement piece When your host has gone above and beyond, a sleek, sculptural accent conveys extreme gratitude— and ensures a repeat invite. Links in resin and wood (18 in.), $365; noblegoods.com.

N E W LY W E D S , A N D G R A D S

Gifts for

THE HOST

Book of wonder This coffee-table tome is filled with satellite photos of our planet. The patterns revealed from above are mesmerizing. Overview, $40; dailyoverview.com.

Color-block basket Add warmth to your host’s brunches and more with this handwoven serving piece, made of organic-dyed sisal and sweetgrass.

Woven bread basket, $64; thelittlemarket .com.

Luxe wine tote

Marbleized vases Made in Istanbul, these eye-catching creations elevate a bookshelf or console. Ebru marble ceramic cylinder vases, $105 (medium) and $95 (small); bazaarwest.com.

WRITTEN BY STEPHANIE SISCO

MARKET EDITOR RACHAEL WEINER

PHOTOGRAPHS BY JEFF WESTBROOK

For a sophisticated twist on everyone’s go-to gift, present a bottle in this chic, reusable carrier.

Market Tote Small, $95; maharam.com.

JUNE 2017

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SUMMER GIFTS

Sleek drone A man-powered vehicle for his GoPro camera: Throw this lightweight launcher to get aerial images on hikes, at soccer practice, or even while lounging by the pool. Aer, $54 each; aervideo.com.

Timeless manual

Gifts for

DADS

This collection of commentary is filled with 19th-century thoughts on dress, food, and exercise— some of which are still applicable today. Walt Whitman’s Guide to Manly Health & Training, $15; amazon.com.

Air guitar hero Give his imaginary jam sessions an actual soundtrack with the help of this app-connected pick, which plays music along with his motions. Airjamz electric air guitar toys, $5 each; play airjamz.com.

Indestructible icebox Head outside on Father’s Day with this colorful cooler (choose from four fun shades). It holds up to 14 cans of Dad’s favorite drinks and plenty of ice to keep them frosty. Yeti Tundra Roadie, $250; yeti.com for stores.

For the dad who continually struggles to find a matching pair, this service sends a shipment of the same style sock every four months. Classic calf socks, $89 (for 3 deliveries of 3 pairs); blacksocks.com.

Game roll This dual-sided game board folds up so you and Dad can play backgammon or checkers anywhere.

Canvas and leather game roll, $175; aemcateer.com.

JUNE 2017

A ER , A I R JA M Z , G A M E R O L L : C O U RT E SY O F V EN D O R S

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THE REALIST

SUMMER GIFTS

Nesting bakeware

Gifts for

NEWLYWEDS

A set of seven speckled dishes that are oven, dishwasher, and microwave safe gives the couple the tools they’ll need for dinners in.

Fluted stoneware baking-dish set, $110; leifshop.com.

Metallic stamp Make an impression with a custom copper stamp featuring their monogram or new address. Self-inking rubber stamp in copper, from $160; wmscoink.com.

Double shot This dual-cup pour-over coffee brewer will give their mornings a steamy start.

DoubleDouble Canadiano, $99; canadiano.co.

They’ll fall in love with this simple, made-for-them soy candle. Choose from 12 scents. Customlabel mason jar candle, $30; brooklyn candlestudio.com.

Pillow talk These sweet embroidered pillowcases say it all (and remind couples never to go to bed angry). Lovey Dovey organic pillowcases, $49 for 2; elsiegreen.com.

JUNE 2017

Instant art For an everchanging art wall, this digital frame offers access to thousands of famous images or lets the couple display their own. The picture quality is impressive.

Meural Canvas, from $595; meural.com.

STA M P, D O U B L ED O U B L E , CA N D L E , M EU R A L : C O U RT E SY O F V EN D O R S

Personalized candle

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SUMMER GIFTS

Compact gadget For first-apartment fixes, this 36-in-1 tool corrals anything they might need (level, screwdriver, corkscrew) within one handy instrument. Kelvin 36, $50; kelvintools.com.

Bookworm bling

Gifts for

GRADS

They may be done hitting the books, but they’ll certainly enjoy showing off whimsical enamel versions of their favorite classic titles. Choose from 38 designs.

Book pins, $11 each; idealbookshelf.com.

Fabric-wrapped speaker Use this sleek little speaker with big-time sound capability to fill a small space, or wirelessly connect it to a second one for multiroom audio. Choose from six colors. Stammen speaker, $349; urbanears.com.

Insta-cam They can snap a graduation pic, add frames and filters, then print a copy directly from the camera. So fun. Polaroid Snap Touch instant digital camera, $180; amazon.com.

These sunglasses offer a handsfree way to take 10-second Snapchat videos and instantly upload them to the social media platform. Spectacles

by Snap Inc., $130; spectacles.com.

Suspended tent

For more gift ideas, visit realsimple.com/summergifts.

JUNE 2017

For the postgrad heading out on an adventure, this lightweight solo sleeper hammock comes with bug- and rainrepelling covers.

REI Co-op Quarter Dome air hammock, $219; rei.com.

S P E A K ER , S P ECTAC L E S , T EN T: C O U RT E SY O F V EN D O R S

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Cooking Light is a food and recipes magazine focused on living a healthy lifestyle. These products are developed under license from Cooking Light magazine. Cooking Light is not intended as a nutritional claim. Cooking Light is a trademark of Time Inc. Lifestyle Group. All reference trademarks are the properties of their respective owners. ©2017 Time Inc.

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Summer-Proof Your Skin

T H E L I C E N S I N G P R O J E C T. C O M

These six women face the sun all day long to get their jobs done. Who better to share strategies for keeping skin healthy and beautiful?

W R I T T E N B Y C O L L E E N S U L L I VA N

P H O T O G R A P H B Y J O H N M I C H A E L F U LT O N

J U N E 2017

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THE REALIST

Professional soccer player KIM REYNOLDS, 29, MOUNT DORA, FLORIDA

Growing up, I was told that people of color did not need to wear sunscreen. After I was at the beach for a tournament one year, my forehead became itchy, and it burned. My teammates pointed out that my skin was turning pink and insisted it was a sunburn. I called my mom, and she just laughed it off.

But once I got home and she saw my skin, her mouth dropped and she said, “Wow, I guess it’s true—we can get sunburned.”

ME + THE SUN:

Hor ticulturist B R I E A R T H U R , 3 8 , F U Q U AY - V A R I N A , NORTH CAROLINA

There are days when I’m in the garden from early morning until sundown—I’m always sweaty, dirty, and exposed to the sun.

MY JOB:

ME + THE SUN: I didn’t take care of my skin when I was younger; I would cover myself in baby oil and use reflective screens to intensify the sun’s effect. Now I try to position myself under the trees and garden in the early morning and early evening, when the sun is not high. I often say I have chlorophyll in my veins and need sunlight to photosynthesize, just like a plant. However, I’m aware of how dangerous the sun’s rays can be to my skin.

Gardeners rely on sunscreens that won’t wipe off. The two I love are nonsticky and reasonably priced: Trader Joe’s Refresh Face & Body Sunscreen SPF 30 for my face and Trader Joe’s Nourish Spray Sunscreen SPF 50 for my body ($6 each; at Trader Joe’s). I’ve been using them for five years and have never been sunburned. For moisturizer, I apply vitamin E as an oil to my legs, arms, and face, particularly under my eyebrows.

SUNSCREEN:

J U N E 2017

I’ve applied sunscreen every day for 16 years. My favorites— Coola, Banana Boat, and Neutrogena—don’t leave my skin oily.

After showering, I apply organic coconut oil or a lotion containing aloe vera or shea butter to my face and body or my skin becomes really dry and flaky. I like Fruit of the Earth’s Shea Butter ($12 for 2; amazon.com).

SUNSCREEN:

Cruise director BECCA NE W TON, 34, CUBA AND THE DOMINICAN REPUBLIC MY JOB: I work on a cruise ship where my backyard is the ocean and my “home” alternates weekly between ports. I’m always facing a hot and humid day.

I would classify myself as a “tanorexic” in my 20s— I had a membership to a tanning salon and rarely used sunblock.

I have changed my ways, but it’s hard to tell how much damage I did—I definitely regret it.

ME + THE SUN:

In the morning, I apply a moisturizer with SPF for sensitive skin— Clinique Smart Broad Spectrum SPF 15 Custom Repair Moisturizer ($54; clinique.com).

It’s creamy but not greasy, and it soaks right in. During the day, I also use an SPF mineral-based powder that comes with a self-dispensing brush, so it’s easy to apply (Susan Posnick Brush on Block SPF 30, $32; susanposnick.com). For my body, I love Neutrogena Ultra Sheer Body Mist Sunscreen SPF 30 ($10; neutrogena.com).

In terms of repair, my crow’s-feet have gotten smaller since I started using Neutrogena Rapid Wrinkle Repair Eye Cream ($21; neutrogena.com).

SUNSCREEN:

F LOW E R : I STO C K P H OTO / G E T T Y I M AG E S ; R E M A I N I N G I M AG E S : C O U RT E SY O F S U B J ECTS

MY JOB: In addition to being a midfielder for the Orlando Pride, I oversee a girls’ soccer program. When I’m on the field, I can feel the sun constantly beaming down on me, and I count the minutes until it goes down.

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Letter carrier G AY E I B A R A , 4 6 , HONOLULU

Golf instructor

I’m out every day delivering mail to my customers. My route takes place from 9:30 a.m. to 3 p.m., when the Hawaiian sun is at its strongest.

MY JOB:

M E G H A N M A H O N E Y, 3 2 , N A N T U C K E T, MASSACHUSETTS, A N D W E ST PA L M BEACH, FLORIDA MY JOB: As an LPGA instructor, I’m on the golf course from sunrise to sunset. I often feel the sun’s rays radiating off my hands and knees and find myself compensating by instinctively holding my hands behind my back.

I think it’s the story of every girl in Hawaii from my generation. We would lie on the beach covered in baby oil to make our skin dark. We didn’t know any better back then, and I think we all shudder at the thought of it now.

ME + THE SUN:

As a child, I didn’t wear a lot of sunscreen, and I never wore a hat or sunglasses. Now I see the effects, including freckling on the tops of my shoulders and wrinkles on my face brought on by squinting.

ME + THE SUN:

I apply sunscreen three or four times a day: morning, lunch, midafternoon, and often another round. I love La Roche-Posay Anthelios 60 Ultra-Light Sunscreen Fluid ($30; laroche-posay.us)—the lotion feels light on my skin and has almost no scent. To protect my lips, I wear Aquaphor Lip Protectant + Sunscreen ($5.50; at drugstores). I always pop my collar to help shield my neck, and at night I use an anti-aging regimen of Murad Essential-C products ($28 to $95; murad.com), including cleanser, toner, eye cream, and moisturizer, which have helped with wrinkles.

SUNSCREEN:

G O L F : I STO C K P H OTO / G E T T Y I M AG E S ; R E M A I N I N G I M AG E S : C O U RT E SY O F S U B J ECTS

I’ve found that the best way to apply sunscreen is to dispense it onto my palm and warm it up by rubbing my hands together to liquefy the product before smoothing it over my skin. I’ve been using Shiseido sunscreen for 16 years, as long as I’ve been a mail carrier. Right now I like Shiseido Ultimate Sun Protection Cream Broad Spectrum SPF 50+ ($36; shiseido .com). I’m devoted to it because of its high SPF and because it adheres to my skin, even if I perspire. The moisturizer I use is expensive, but it has an SPF 30 and erases dark spots: RéVive Perfectif Even Skin Tone Cream sunscreen ($275; revive skincare.com).

SUNSCREEN:

Winemaker D E N I S E S H U R T L E F F , 5 7 , S A N TA M A R I A , C A L I F O R N I A MY JOB: I oversee operations for a winery, which requires me to spend a lot of time in our 1,600-acre vineyard. During harvest, I’m outdoors all day.

I’m a California native, so I’ve always loved the sun for its warmth and comfort and the sense of relaxation.

The sun keeps my grapes happy and never fails to brighten my mood, but I know it’s important to stay protected.

ME + THE SUN:

I’ve been using Neutrogena Ultra Sheer Dry-Touch Sunscreen SPF 55 ($7; neutrogena.com) for over a decade.

The smell isn’t overwhelming—you can’t have olfactory interference when you’re relying on your sense of smell. In the morning, I apply Neutrogena Ageless Intensives Anti-Wrinkle Deep Wrinkle Daily Moisturizer SPF 20 ($20.50; neutrogena.com) right out of the shower—it keeps me moisturized without feeling greasy.

I wear long-sleeve shirts with built-in SPF protection and a wide-brimmed hat.

SUNSCREEN:

J U N E 2017

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Sunny D e l i g ht s

2

FROM PINK-TINTED L EN S E S TO F R E S H W H I T E F R A M E S , T H E TO P TRENDS IN sunglasses ARE ANYTHING BUT O R D I N A R Y. 3

Translucent Tints With a rainbow of options, there’s no clear winner (we love ’em all).

1 T E D BA K E R Yellow can be a tricky color to pull off, but this barely there golden hue looks lovely on all skin tones.

TO BUY: $179; lordandtaylor.com.

PROP ST YL ING BY RACHEL ST ICKLEY FOR BERNSTE IN & ANDRIULL I

4

2 WA R BY PA R K E R

5

W R I T T E N B Y R E B E C C A D A LY

P H O T O G R A P H S B Y S H A N A N O VA K

Need prescription shades? This company can switch out the regular lenses for your Rx. TO BUY: Ormsby, $95; warbyparker .com.

3 CI R C U S BY SAM EDELMAN The palest purple adds a pop of color to any outfit and flatters without clashing.

TO BUY: Wayfarer, $36; lordandtaylor .com.

4 SALT Made from premium acetate―which is more durable than low-priced plastic―this sturdy, polarized pair is lightweight and super comfortable.

TO BUY: Tavita, $430; at Bergdorf Goodman (888-774-2424).

5 R O B E RT M A R C Even the hinges on this vaguely vintage pair, handcrafted in France, are works of art.

TO BUY: Fiji, $495; at Robert Marc (212-799-4600).

J U N E 2017

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1

2

Bright White

3 GUESS

Metallic accents and modern shapes make this trend summer’s sharpest style.

This pair is petitely proportioned― perfect for those with smaller faces.

TO BUY: Top Bar, $80; shop.guess.com.

4 A M I C LU BW E A R

1 REISS Oversize frames like these can complement wide-set faces.

TO BUY: Monokel Cleo, $190; reiss.com.

2 L.A .M.B. F O R T U RA Gilded edges add just a touch of glam―and don’t feel over the top.

TO BUY: Gigi, $229; tura.com.

A square lens shape provides balance for oval faces.

TO BUY: Retro Square, $25; amiclubwear.com.

5 MCM

3

Futuristic and a little ’80s all at once, thanks to the angular shape and playful mix of white and gold.

TO BUY: $345; mcm worldwide.com.

4

5

J U N E 2017

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2

3

4

Metallic Pink See the world through rose-colored glasses—literally.

1 N E W YO R K & C O M PA N Y

5

If the brow-bar trend feels a little overwhelming, you may find this subtler take easier to wear.

TO BUY: Shield Brow Bar, $15; nyandcompany.com.

3 P E RV E R S E Glasses for good: This company donates 1 percent of sales, inventory, and employee time to charitable causes.

TO BUY: Elaine, $55; perversesunglasses .com.

4 ST E V E M A D D E N A rosy glow softens these metal statement-making aviators.

TO BUY: Rosegold, $36; stevemadden.com.

5 H A DI D E Y E W E A R

2 SONIX Blush-toned frames and mirrored lenses make a menswearinspired style more ladylike.

TO BUY: Bellevue, $98; shopsonix.com.

The sharply angled shape gives the illusion of higher cheekbones.

Instant face-lift!

TO BUY: Jetsetter, $149; hadideyewear .com.

See which frames might look best with your face shape at realsimple.com/faceshape.

J U N E 2017

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5 Q U E ST IO N S YO U S H O U L D A S K YO U R DA D W H AT I S YO U R F I R ST M E M O RY A S M Y FAT H E R ?

I T ’ S G R AT I F Y I N G to be told what you can’t possibly recall. My sons, both still young, laugh hysterically at tales of their infancy—their refusal to nap, their reliance on a pacifier.

I hope someday to explain to them why I still have the blue shirt I wore the day my husband and I sat in a conference room and met our oldest for the first time. It conjures for me that warm October afternoon, our dumbstruck silence in the cab heading to the meeting. Memory is not a record but a theory—a story we tell ourselves, close to the truth but not quite true. But this shirt is proof that my life changed in an instant; it helps me order my story.

Asking your father what he remembers may help you tell your own.

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RUMAAN ALAM IS THE AUTHOR OF THE NOVEL RICH AND PRET TY. HE L IVES IN NEW YORK CITY.

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J U N E 2017

R E L AT I N G

W H AT S H O U L D I LO O K F O R I N A PA RT N E R ?

WA N N A G O F O R A WA L K?

MY DATES USED to have to come over and “meet” with Dad before we went out. He’d make them play pool with him and answer questions (not intimidating at all). I always cringed and just prayed that Dad would let us leave sooner rather than later.

Still, I’ve always known how important it is to get my dad’s opinion. My mother is fiercely independent: Her advice is often along the lines of “Make sure you’re able to support yourself so that regardless of what happens, you have yourself to fall back on.” Fathers tend to be protective. Because Dad considers Mom his equal, and because he knows I’m my mother’s daughter, he was able to offer another perspective. His biggest wish for me was that I’d find a partner who wasn’t threatened by my shine and who was confident enough to not be intimidated by any success. Someone who would proudly walk by my side, defend my honor, and encourage me to achieve my dreams. Thankfully, I did.

R E S E A RC H T E L L S U S that exercise is the most powerful tool to prevent many diseases, including Alzheimer’s. Along with maintaining a healthy diet, moderate daily activity—a brisk, 30-minute walk is all you need—is a proven intervention that can help increase how long we live and improve how well we live.

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Find out what wisdom readers’ fathers have passed on at realsimple.com/dadadvice.

J U N E 2017

PINCHAS COHEN, MD, IS THE DE AN OF THE UNIVERSITY OF SOUTHERN CAL IFORNI A LEONARD DAVIS SCHOOL OF GERONTOLOGY IN LOS ANGELES.

W H AT WA S I T L I K E D U R I N G T H E WA R ?

W H AT D O YO U T H I N K YO U R L AT E R Y E A R S W I L L LO O K L I K E ?

W H E N M Y DA D was taking care of his older relatives, he thought a lot about what he was looking for when he got older. He forced me to have a talk about it. At first it was awkward—he drew up a contract, and one part said that when a medical professional says it’s time to live in an old-age home, he and my mother will go. I’d always thought he’d want us, his kids, to take care of them at home, but they don’t want to be a burden.

I can’t change his mind, and it’s nice that we’ve settled it so there’s no guilt. Frame the question positively: “What is your vision for your retirement and later years?” Open the dialogue early so you don’t have to guess.

JULIE AGNEW, PHD, IS AN ASSOCIATE PROFESSOR AT THE RAYMOND A . MASON SCHOOL OF BUSINESS AT WILL IAM & MARY AND A RESE ARCH ASSOCIATE FOR THE CENTER FOR RETIREMENT RESE ARCH AT BOSTON COLLEGE. SHE L IVES IN WILL IAMSBURG, VIRGINIA .

E V E RYO N E L I V I N G in the last century has some kind of wartime memory, whether of Vietnam or the first Gulf War. You’re bound to get some stories, even from a man who didn’t serve.

(It would still have been an impactful moment in his life.)

If your father is stoic, asking this question can be a good way to break the ice. He may say, “I was in this battalion in such-andsuch a province.” From there, you can ask, “Would you mind telling me about it?” If he doesn’t want to say much, he can have the out. But if you have a father who’s been under actual fire, you are likely to learn something new and interesting.

MEGAN SMOLENYAK IS A GENE ALOGIST AND THE AUTHOR OF WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE? THE ESSENT IAL GUIDE TO TRACING YOUR FAMILY HISTORY. SHE L IVES IN ST. PETERSBURG, FLORIDA .

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R E L AT I N G

Good Read

WA N D E R I N G T H E A I S L E S O F A F O O D M A R K E T I N A S T R A N G E C I T Y, I l a n a M a n a s t e r F O U N D H E R C O M M U N I T Y … A N D N E W EYES FOR THE DISPL ACED SOUL S ALL AROUND HER.

J U N E 2017

PHOTOGRAPH BY CHRIS SORENSEN

G A L L E RY STO C K

One of the Crowd

R E L AT I N G

“

J U N E 2017

WOR R I E S M E to hear that you aren’t cooking,” a friend wrote in a text after I moved to Barcelona with my husband and toddler. Admittedly, there was cause for concern—not because I wasn’t cooking but because of what I was doing instead: sitting at a desk in a small room in the furnished apartment we’d rented, writing and thinking longingly of the place we’d left, New York.

We came to Barcelona for an adventure, before our son got old enough to make that impossible. It’s a beautiful, warm, culturally alive city—a food city. I’m fluent in Spanish, and I’d expected to find excitement and inspiration in the charming streets of my new surroundings. Instead, I found myself in a muck of downheartedness verging on despair. Leaving behind the city I’d moved to in my starry-eyed youth, and all the relationships I’d built over 12 years there, turned out to be much harder than I had expected. I felt nothing so much as unseen, as if, when I left the people I knew and loved, I’d actually vanished. Lonelier than being alone is being completely surrounded by strangers who have plans for the weekend that don’t include you.

“What’s the point of putting on an outfit?” I thought, staring into my closet. “I don’t know anybody here.”

Homesick, friendless, I had to adjust to a completely new way of doing absolutely everything. New York has its own processes, which I knew as well as I knew the streets of Manhattan. Barcelona seemed to have an even stricter set of rules and rituals, but I didn’t know what they were and had nobody I could ask to help me make sense of them. This was especially true when it came to eating and cooking.

Just about every Barcelona neighborhood has its own municipal market. Ours, Mercat de l’Estrella, was steps away, at the end of our block. Small compared with other markets in the city, it was chaotic and intimidating nonetheless, with endless rows of stalls snaking across two floors. Lines of elderly women with overflowing grocery carts extended in every direction. Vendors sipped espresso beneath dangling cured pork thighs and fire-red chorizos. Fish pulled from the Mediterranean mere hours earlier lay on ice. There were stalls of seasonal vegetables and bins of nuts and dried fruit. All of it looked delicious, but how was I supposed to buy it? How to ask for it, measure it, purchase it here, in this community that functioned as it always had, while I was an outsider?

Upstairs I discovered a cansaladeria, or delicatessen, where a vast array of remarkable things could be purchased fully cooked. Rejoice! Only I still wasn’t clear on how to proceed. I hesitated in front of the case, unsure of what to get or how, but the women behind the counter kindly offered to help. They explained the things that I had never eaten before, regional classics that were as standard for them as

IT

I n n o t i m e , I wa s a r e g u l a r a t t h e m a r ke t . T h e l a d i e s b e h i n d t h e c o u n t e r g r e e t e d m e wa r m l y, a s ke d h o w we we r e a d a p t i n g t o o u r n e w s u r r o u n d i n g s . I f e l t l e s s l i ke a g h o s t a n d m o r e l i ke a c i t i ze n .

they were new to me: salty artichokes with fava beans, sepia stuffed with ground meat, spinach with raisins and pine nuts, country sausage and white beans, roasted rabbit. There was no expectation, as there would be in New York, that I hurry. Slowly, with guidance, I chose what I wanted. That night, on our balcony, while looking out at the hills on one side and the sea in the distance, we feasted.

And so began a daily ritual. After I dropped off my son at his wonderful neighborhood preschool, I went to the market to pick up dinner. In no time, I was a regular. The ladies behind the counter greeted me warmly, asked how we were adapting to our new surroundings. I felt less like a ghost, haunting the streets of my neighborhood, and more like a citizen, contributing to its vitality through participation. Conversation mattered here, I discovered. To stay, to choose carefully, to discuss and gossip was how things were done in Barcelona, and I began to enjoy myself.

Over time, emboldened by my growing familiarity with the place and its customs, I branched out to other stalls. The gruff, bearded fishmonger turned out to be warm and helpful. Parboil some potatoes and slice them thin to roast under the fish, a little cava in there, too, don’t forget, he said as he used an enormous cleaver to slit a dorado so I could tuck in lemon slices. Parsley was free with purchase. He wore gloves to prepare the fish but didn’t A B O U T T H E AU T H O R take them off when we exchanged Ilana Manaster is the money, so euros came to me speckauthor of the young-adult led with fish blood. This was how it novel Doreen. Her nonfiction has appeared was done, and I did it, too, hauling in Cosmopolitan and everything home in my rolling cart Blunderbuss. She lives to cook like a real Catalan lady. in Chicago.

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R E L AT I N G

The staff at the vegetable stand I liked always kept cookies behind the counter for my son when he was with me.

“Hola, guapo!” they said (“Hi, handsome”). We liked the spinach tortilla from the nut stall and the tortilla de patatas from the chicken stall downstairs. I learned that one of the chicken ladies had a son a year older than mine who attended the same preschool. We asked after each other’s children as she wrapped my tortilla or, if it was Friday, scooped paella into a carton.

When my pregnancy became obvious, the women at the cansaladeria inquired about my health and comfort, adding a ladleful more rice or sauce after they’d metered out the price. My daughter was born a year into our time in Barcelona, and we stayed six months more before the distance became too much and we moved again, to Chicago, where our families lived.

On my last day at the market, the women at the cansaladeria fawned over the baby girl I wore wrapped tightly to my body and wished us luck. For family, of course, you must return, they said. They referred to Chicago as our tierra, our land, a funny notion for America, where we believe that earth

can be bought and sold but does not belong to anyone. I thanked them and, somewhat wistfully, said goodbye.

In Chicago we started over yet again. Again we found an apartment, a pediatrician, childcare. We figured out where to shop, to eat. As I had in Barcelona, I engaged with the fish guy at my favorite supermarket, the butcher at the German meat store. But these everyday interactions are fundamentally different for me in Chicago, not only because it is a different kind of place but also because I don’t hunger for them in the same way. I grew up here. Many of my oldest friends live in the area, as do my entire family and most of my husband’s. But because of my experience in Barcelona, I have become attuned to people who do not have the connections to this place that I have. I hear their yearning when they describe the home they left and the bewilderment they’re experiencing in their new town. When I encounter these disoriented newcomers, I try to make myself available to them, to let them know that despite all they left behind, they are not alone.

To a neighbor who was eight months pregnant with her second child, I offered our house as a safe place for her

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J U N E 2017

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2-year-old son during labor and delivery. Neither she nor her husband knew many people in Chicago, and I remembered the intricate childcare plans I had made for my son when I gave birth far from home.

Friends in New York connected me to a writer with three kids who had just moved here. “Who will be my emergency contact?” she asked the third time we hung out.

“Me,” I said, because of course.

At the playground, I struck up a conversation with a woman from France who has not been able to work here since her partner was transferred. I made sure to ask how she felt, having given up her career.

“It’s been hard,” she said.

I nodded. I know how it is to be far away and out of touch with the person you were.

Displaced souls roam every city in every country. Having been one, I see them clearly, and I can provide for them what I received from the vendors of Mercat de l’Estrella—a bit of warm contact in an unfamiliar place. This is my tierra, after all, and I want those who come to love it as I do to be welcomed and feel seen. Q

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100

R E L AT I N G

Modern Manners Catherine Newman, OFFERS HER BEST ADV ICE

M . B . A S KS . . .

O N YO U R S O CI A L Q UA N DA R I E S .

My in-laws want to babysit all the time.

In fact, they are offended if we want to pay a babysitter. This seems like a win-win: They get to see our boys, and we get free babysitting! But my in-laws are super messy. The last time we came home, I found stains on my carpet and counters from the sauce they served with dinner. They leave indoor toys outside, where they get ruined. They leave milk out. I feel like I’m cleaning up for days after they’re here. I am a clean freak, and I know I need to compromise.

But some things are unacceptable.

How can we nicely ask them to clean up? Or do we just need to start using a babysitter?

E . G . A S KS . . .

My husband and I recently attended our godson’s wedding. During the rehearsal dinner, my husband gave the groom a card from us and told him it contained a nice monetary contribution to the new couple’s honeymoon.

We have not heard anything from them about the cash. We did, however, receive a timely thank-you note for a shower gift we sent prior to the wedding. Given that, I’d assume we’d have gotten some sort of acknowledgment of the money by now. Should I ask our godson about it? How? If he somehow lost it, we don’t plan to replace the money, so should we just let the whole thing go?

ALAS, I FEAR that no good can come from such an inquiry, however well intended. Assuming they used your generous gift to pay their honeymoon bar tab, the newlyweds are likely to feel scolded―or, at best, guilty―about not thanking you already. And if they did somehow misplace it? What then? Calling the tuxrental company all these months later does not feel like a promising course of action. (“Hi. Did you happen to find a hundred dollars in a vest pocket a few months ago?”) But I honestly don’t think your godson lost the cash, especially given your sensible caveat. I imagine, rather, that the pair are dealing with a much bigger backlog of thank-yous than they were for the shower and are taking advantage of the classic yearlong window for getting them out. I’m not a huge fan of the one-year etiquette rule for wedding-gift thank-yous―it drags out something that is better accomplished in that first flush of energetic gratitude―but it’s still widely practiced. Trust that the money was spent and enjoyed and that you’ll soon be hearing exactly that.

J U N E 2017

ABOUT CAT H E R I N E The author of Catastrophic Happiness and Waiting for Birdy, Catherine Newman has shared her wisdom on matters ranging from family and friends to happiness and pickling in numerous publications.

She gets advice from her husband and two opinionated children in Amherst, Massachusetts.

I’M GUESSING THAT there’s a deeper issue here, one about control or general in-law annoyingness― or about how your partner does or doesn’t communicate with them. But let me stick with the issue at hand. My first solution would be to minimize the opportunities the grandparents have for trashing your house. Take the kids to their house instead, especially on occasions when they don’t need to go to bed; feed the kids beforehand; send everyone to the pizza place down the street; or prepare or order in some nice, tidy meals (sandwiches, foil-wrapped burritos) that will be less likely to end up on the furniture. My second solution would be to use the money you’re saving on a sitter to pay someone to clean up the next day. Only as a last resort would I give up and hire a sitter. The relationships you’re facilitating are so much more important than clean countertops, and it’s probably a nice balance for the kids to spend time with people who are less fastidious. Use this as an opportunity to temper your neatnik impulses as best as you can―and know, as irritating as it is to have to drag the beanbag chairs back in from the yard, that at least you’ve got your priorities in order.

T H E M A C X / G E T T Y I M A G E S ; I L LU ST R AT IO N BY U L I K N Ö R Z ER

R E A L S I M P L E ’ S E T I Q U E T T E E X P E R T,

K . T. A S KS . . .

M . H . A S KS . . .

H . A R M ST R O N G R O B E RTS / C L A S S IC STO C K / G E T T Y I M AG E S

My daughter just learned that two friends are having their sweet 16 parties on the same day. One is a longtime friend who now goes to another school, so although she and my daughter stay in touch and are still close, they are in very different social groups. The second birthday girl goes to my daughter’s school, and most of the teens coming to her party are current classmates. She is now very conflicted about which party to attend.

She doesn’t want to hurt the first girl’s feelings, but I know she’s leaning toward the second party. What are your thoughts? Go to both parties?

PARENT QUESTIONS ARE always double-pronged: What is the proper etiquette? And what am I teaching my child? Ideally, a good solution overlaps with the desired message.

In this case, there’s a lesson about loyalty. “Make new friends but keep the old; one is silver, and the other’s gold.” Given that this old friendship is a treasured one, your daughter should maintain it―even when it becomes inconvenient to do so.

If she can make even a brief appearance at the old friend’s party, that’s ideal. Another option is to attend only the schoolmate’s party and send a card to the old friend that recognizes both the milestone and the long-standing significance of the relationship. “I’m so sorry not to be able to come!” she can write.

“Let’s make sure to find a time to hang out soon.” Time alone together, without navigating the complex terrain of new social configurations, might be the happiest option for both of them.

I am in my early 30s and on Facebook, as are most of my friends and family.

Sometimes when they have parties or informal get-togethers, they invite everyone through a Facebook post.

There is an option to RSVP and to reply with information on the “wall” for the party or event. I hate the fact that everyone can see if I am going or not.

I also find it lazy. I don’t need a mailed invite, but a phone call would be so much fun to get! Is there anything I can do about this trend?

I HAPPEN TO love having a houseful of people over, but I am more likely to scratch an invitation in the dirt with a stick than get around to calling everyone individually. That said, I am sympathetic to your dismay― both over the loss of old-fashioned traditions and over the increasingly public nature of our online lives.

So the short answer is that people get to invite you however they like.

(And lucky you to have this problem!)

But that doesn’t mean you have to RSVP in kind. If you don’t want everyone to see your intentions, call the host or pop him or her an email or private message. Or quit Facebook altogether, and people will be forced to reach out to you via a different medium―assuming they remember to include you.

Better still, throw your own party and mail out the exact kind of invitation you wish other people would send you. Maybe you’ll start a trend!

H AV E A N E T IQ U E T T E Q U E ST IO N ?

Submit your social conundrums to Catherine at realsimple.com/modernmanners. Selected letters will be featured on these pages every month.

102

R E L AT I N G

MEET THE MUTTROPOLIS OWNERS Georgia and Steve Goldberg live in Rancho Santa Fe, California, with their two pooches, (from left) Benny, a terrier mix rescue, and Teddy, an Airedale rescue.

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J U N E 2017

W H E N I N T E R I O R designer Georgia Goldberg couldn’t find pet products stylish enough to blend in with her home decor, she took matters into her own hands—and those of her husband, Steve, a restaurateur and nightclub owner. In 2002 the duo opened Muttropolis, an emporium of elevated dog and cat essentials, in Solana Beach, California. Today, with a second location in La Jolla and an e-commerce site, Muttropolis is a go-to for high-end supplies, from gear made by local artisans to natural treats from a neighborhood baker. Georgia gave us a look at the shop’s most popular pet goodies.

All products shown are available at muttropolis.com.

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ITINERARY 1: ROAD TRIP

PIC K LO D G I N G T H AT D O E S DOUBLE DUTY

“Look for accommodations that are destinations,” says Sarah Waffle Gavin, a travel expert at Expedia. “The more time your kids spend in the pool, the less you’re spending on expensive activities.”

Properties like Great Wolf Lodge— a chain with 14 locations in North America—cater to family sleep needs (think: tent-themed privacy partitions and bunk beds) and feature on-site water parks. And if your family does well in warm climates, you could save big this time of year. “The general rule in the summer is the hotter the destination, the hotter the deals are to stay there,” says Gavin. “Places like Las Vegas and Palm Springs are fantastic, and you can save as much as 50 percent by going when it isn’t their peak time.”

GET T Y IMAGES

PUT A LIMIT ON P I T STO P S

“Eating out for every meal is the hugest road trip no-no,” says Kara Williams, co-owner of The Vacation Gals lifestyle website. “Pack a cooler that you can refill with stuff like snacks, sandwich fixings, hummus, yogurt, bagels, and

juice.” Speaking of pit stops, for the cheapest gas around, check out apps like Gas Guru and GasBuddy, which will scan the area and do a price comparison for you.

DON’T ASSUME YO U H AV E TO PAY R E TA I L

Coughing up full price at the ticket window might not be necessary.

Your existing memberships at museums, zoos, and the like may have reciprocity in other cities, and many institutions offer free admission on certain days of the week. Research local chamber of commerce websites, Red Tricycle (redtri.com), and macaronikid.com for more info.

“Families with a fourth grader can get into all U.S. national parks for free with the Every Kid in a Park pass,” says Shelly Rivoli, author of Travels with Baby and founder of FamilyTravel411 .com. For more discounted fun, download the Groupon and LivingSocial apps for your destination, says Lissa Poirot, editor in chief of Family VacationCritic.com.

Just confirm that your purchase can be used on your desired dates.

ITINERARY 2: CRUISE

SURF THE MARKET

Prices can fluctuate widely, so request weekly fare newsletters from a site such as CruiseCritic.com.

When something catches your eye, don’t stall: “Large suites and cabins designed for families, such as those with connecting doors, sell out first,” says Carolyn Spencer Brown, editor in chief of CruiseCritic.com.

After you’ve made your reservation, sign up for a tracking service: Sites like CruiseFish.net and Cruiseline.com will alert you if the rate drops.

Depending on how far out you are from your sailing date, you can usually cancel and rebook to take advantage of the better deal or request a price match.

SHOP AROUND FOR SHORE THINGS

You’ll likely pay a premium by signing up for shore excursions through the cruise line, says Poirot. Instead, make your arrangements directly with local vendors or larger tour operators like Cruise Compete.com and ShoreTrips.com.

“Be sure to research the company thoroughly and leave plenty of time to get back to the ship. They won’t wait for passengers who are delayed on independently organized tours,” says Poirot.

some pirate-level boozing to get your money’s worth.

(Besides, if you do find yourself racking up a hefty bar tab, most lines will allow you to switch over to a package at any point during your voyage for a prorated amount.) On the flip side, nonalcoholic beverage packages—at around $5.50 to $10 per day—could be a no-brainer for the kids. “If it’s likely that they’ll drink three or more sodas or juices a day while onboard the ship—not including shore time—then you should consider it,” says Poirot.

PAY ALONG THE WAY

Prepaid alcoholic beverage packages can be tempting— but at an average daily cost of $50 per person, not to mention the added gratuity charge of 15 percent or more, you’d have to do

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PIC KY E AT E R S ?

PIC N IC !

Exposing your kiddos to the wonder of new cuisines is part of the travel experience—unless you have a picky eater. When nothing on the menu is speaking to your little ones, don’t force it: Let them fill up on healthy favorites like protein bars and trail mix, says Colleen Lanin, founder of Travel Mamas.com. You can also get plenty of low-priced—but still familiar—fare locally. “Purchase bread from a bakery and cheese, meat, and fruits from an open-air market or grocery store, then have a picnic in a park,” says Lanin.

T I M E I T R IG H T

“Booking plane tickets in advance— three weeks or more from your flight’s departure date—is still the biggest key to saving,” says Gavin.

(Once you’re inside that 21-day period, fares can jump by 50 percent.) Purchasing a ticket that includes a Saturday night stayover at your destination can reduce the price by up to 57 percent.

The least expensive time during the summer to visit Europe is August—in particular, August

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20–30—whereas June 1–30 and the Fourth of July holiday week top out at the priciest.

in it.) Purchase directly from the carrier to ensure you’re receiving the correct rate, says Rivoli.

FLY INTERNATIONAL

Foreign airlines tend to have more family-friendly fare policies than their U.S. counterparts.

Children up to age 11 can get a 33 percent discount on medium- and long-haul flights and a 15 percent discount on short-haul flights on Air France, for example. (On American, you’d pay full price for the seat regardless of who’s

TA K E C H A R G E O F M O N E Y M AT T E R S

While abroad, stick to using a credit card that has no

B U Y O N S U N DAY I t ’ s 16 p e r c e n t l e s s exp e n s i ve o n ave ra g e t o book a flight from t h e U. S . t o E u r o p e i f yo u make the re s er vation t h e n , s ay s G av i n .

foreign transaction fees. (Two to try: Chase Sapphire Reserve and the Capital One Venture Card.) If your home bank has a relationship with a bank overseas— Bank of America and Barclays are sister institutions— you can also avoid getting dinged for withdrawals at ATMs. Whatever you do, don’t exchange money at airports or train stations, where the rates are often notoriously high.

M I N D YO U R M O B I L E

All those GPS searches you’ll be doing could add up to beaucoup data usage. Keep it in check by switching your mobile to airplane mode and then manually turning on the Wi-Fi— which you may find more plentiful than it is back at home. “It’s amazing how many places in Europe have free Wi-Fi that you can use to connect for email and free texting options like WhatsApp and iMessage,” says Gavin.

GET T Y IMAGES

ITINERARY 3: EUROPE

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ITINERARY 4: DISNEY WORLD

ST E E R C L E A R OF PRIME TIME

“Disney considers summer peak season to be from the last week of May to the third week of July,” says Lauren Holt, a Disney Parks Moms panelist. (Yes, when it’s most convenient for families to travel based on the school calendar.)

“If you can wait and go at the end of July or in August, you’ll typically find it less expensive and less crowded.”

The old “Time is money” adage definitely applies here, since shorter lines mean you’ll be able to conquer the required territory in fewer days.

GET T Y IMAGES

CA ST A W I D E R N E T

Scoring a discount on a ticket to one of Disney’s parks requires some digging. But hey, at least you can more readily control what you spend on lodging, right? For the biggest bargains, “consider booking your accommodations a few miles away from the park, like the Chatham Park neighborhood,” says Ryan Rabideau, an analyst at Vacasa, a vacation-rental management company. “It’s only about a 15-minute drive, and you can find a threebedroom vacation rental there for

around $109 per night.” Determined to stay at a Disney property but still want room to spread out? Try renting a Disney Deluxe Villa through a third-party source like DVC Rental Store or David’s Vacation Club Rentals. They essentially serve as brokers between tourists and the folks who own Disney timeshares, renting out the same lodging at roughly half of what you’d pay by going through traditional channels.

SKIP THE R E N TA L CA R

“Many hotels, not just Disney properties, provide airport shuttle service, as well as service to and from the park,” says Poirot. Even without, it makes more sense to take a cab, Uber, or Lyft to avoid the rental cost and about $20 daily parking fee.

(The taxi drop-off/ pickup location for Magic Kingdom Park is located at the Transportation and Ticket Center, or TTC, near the monorail.)

E AT A N D D R I N K LIKE AN INSIDER

Before ordering a full meal for everyone, take a look at the portion sizes: “Some of the entrées are big enough to share, and plenty of the side items are big

enough for a meal and at least a few dollars cheaper,” says Holt. (Her most stretchable faves around $15 or less: the half chicken with baked beans, coleslaw, and cornbread at Animal Kingdom’s Flame Tree Barbecue and the steak-andchicken fajita platter with rice and beans at Pecos Bill Tall Tale Inn and Cafe in Magic Kingdom’s Frontierland.) Spring for the

$10 reusable bucket of popcorn on day one and then buy refills in assorted flavors for $1.50 each from kiosks across the park.

B R I N G YO U R OW N

Disney’s makeover stations—“salons” that can charge up to about $200 to transform children into characters via costumes, hair, and makeup—are irresistible to would-be princesses and

pirates. Head those pleas off at the pass by bringing your own costumes. “You should also bring personal misters or fans for when it gets hot and glow sticks for nighttime,” says Holt. “It’s hard not to gravitate toward those light-up souvenirs, but this way you’re prepared with inexpensive versions.”

For Real Simple editors’ best travel tips, go to realsimple .com/traveltips.

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1 N ATA L I E M AC K E Y, 33, COFOUNDER O F C O S M E T IC L I N E W I N KY LUX

1

How They Do It What is the first thing you do when you wake up in the morning?

“Mornings used to feel manic because the first thing I did was look at my phone. So I bought an alarm clock and now try not to sleep with my phone next to my bed. I wake up at 6:30 a.m. and visualize the three things I want to get done. I always try to do the toughest thing first, which helps me feel productive and proactive instead of reactive.”

5

“I find that my creativity is most fertile in the morning. I get up around 7 or 8, and while my eyes are closed, I set an intention for the day. There’s something about the metaphor of morning as being full of opportunity and possibility that I really identify with.”

3 KA R E N A I AC H , 45, FOUNDER AND C EO O F B IOT EC H C O M PA N Y LYS O G EN E

“I wake up between 6:30 and 7 and drink a large glass of water and a coffee in bed. I like to take 10 or 15 minutes for some breathing exercises after opening the windows to let some fresh air in. It’s crucial that I have that time for myself.”

4 C H R I STO P H E R G AV IG A N , 4 3 , C O F O U N D ER A N D CHIEF PURPOSE O F F IC E R O F H O N E ST C O M PA N Y

“My day can be hectic, especially with four children under the age of 9.

At least five days a week, before I walk out of my

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bedroom, I do a stretch routine at the foot of my bed. I go through a set of poses, flow, and breathing exercises for 10 minutes, then have at least two 16ounce glasses of kombucha to feel hydrated.

I try to listen to my body as much as possible.”

3

5 SA RA H R O B B O’ H AG A N , 4 5 , C EO O F F LY W H E E L S P O RTS

“First thing in the morning is a very efficient time for me. I have three kids, so I have to be mindful about when I get everything done.

I get up at around 5:45 a.m., but my day starts the night before. I plan by looking at my calendar and pack a bag with a change of work clothes.

I’m very disciplined about making sure I get to bed at the right time so I can get up, put on my workout gear, and have a high-energy start to the day.”

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WRITTEN BY JANE PORTER

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Productivity Primer

Easy Ways to Make Your Office Happier

ASK BUCKY

You spend a third of your day in that cramped cubicle or ho-hum home office. These design hacks will perk up your space and your attitude.

1 P L AY W I T H L IG H T

Many offices are riddled with abrasive fluorescent fixtures.

To combat this, Jana Bek, an Ann Arbor, Michigan‒based interior designer, suggests this trio of lighting as space allows: a floor lamp for warm uplighting, a table lamp for a flattering glow (try a pink lightbulb for even more ambience), and a small swing-arm lamp for detailed tasks. For an array of all three types, visit lampsplus.com.

2

3

4

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H AV E A N I N B OX ( A H E M , A REAL ONE)

INFUSE THE AIR W I T H CI T R U S

A D D A RT WO R K

BRING A PLANT TO T H E TA B L E

“Most people’s ‘inbasket’ is their entire desk,” says David Allen, author of Getting Things Done. “Having a single collection spot for action items clears mental and physical clutter.” And make your inbox a pretty one (Rustic letter tray, $13; staples.com): A 2012 study in Journal of Consumer Research found that selecting products with good design can improve your self-image.

“Lemon, sweet orange, and grapefruit essential oils are uplifting,” says Sharon Falsetto, chief editor at the National Association for Holistic Aromatherapy. Open floor plan? Forgo a traditional diffuser and instead sparingly spritz essential oil diluted with distilled water at your workstation.

J U N E 2017

Bek swears by actual artwork at a desk (versus the laminated motivational poster variety): “A piece of framed art instantly gives a space a finished, homelike feel.”

A beautiful piece like a painting or print, she points out, can relax and inspire. Plus, it creates far less visual clutter than a disarray of paper ephemera pinned to a corkboard.

(Here and There print pictured; minted.com for more.)

“Plants literally permeate life into a sterile workplace,” says Christopher Satch, head of plant science and education at The Sill, a plant retailer in New York City.

In addition to physical benefits (all that oxygen!), indoor plants may promote creativity.

ZZ plants and snake plants require minimal watering and sunlight.

(From $20; thesill.com.)

I know my coworker is making more money than I am for the same work.

Never discuss your salary with anyone at work but your boss or HR. Nobody wins in that conversation.

Before you go to your boss, do some research. Talk to male and female friends in your field and read industryspecific surveys from a site like salary.com.

If the number you find is different from your own, talk to your boss. Say how much you enjoy your job and that you hope your contributions are being noticed. Then tell her you know your salary is under market.

Be careful of using words like “feel”; this is about facts, not your feelings. Don’t compare yourself with others in your office. When you do, you immediately come across as unprofessional.

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The Trouble with Me Time

W O M A N : G E O R G E M A R K S / R E T R O F I L E / G E T T Y I M A G E S ; M O U N TA I N S : D E A / W. B U S S / D E A G O S T I N I / G E T T Y I M A G E S

It’s your favorite part of the day—and, we’re guessing, the unhealthiest. Make over your evening routine to get the relaxation you deserve without overdosing on sauv blanc, mint chip, Netflix, or your iPhone.

WRITTEN BY LESLIE GOLDMAN

I L L U S T R AT I O N S B Y E U G E N I A L O L I

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F OR Y E A R S , the story of my me time—those precious hours between the end of dinner and the beginning of sleep—has read like a handbook titled What Healthy People Don’t Do at Night.

Wine. Tube cookie dough. A laptop-tablet-TV trifecta of sleepsabotaging blue light. And, yes, part of this has to do with having children: Preschoolers and teenagers alike have a way of sending parents into a postbedtime roundoff, back handspring, double-pike tumbling pass into our vice of choice. But honestly, I engaged in these subpar evening health habits before kids, too. Because if you’re a woman and you spend your day doing anything other than lounging at a pool, you need some time at night to unwind.

Time to treat yourself. And, more often than not, time for all bad health to break loose.

“At the end of the day, we are full of emotions that need to be processed: anxiety from work, exhaustion from running around all day,” says Christine Carter, PhD, a sociologist and happiness expert at the Greater Good Science Center, based at the University of California, Berkeley. “But we’re so exhausted that we just want to zone out, so we turn to numbing behaviors like consuming social media, sugar, alcohol, and TV.”

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It’s hard to keep this behavior in check, because by the time we’re wrapping up the day, we’re fresh out of willpower. “Our brain is done making good decisions.

We did that all day at work, parenting, cooking, errand-running, exercising, and more,” says Rebecca Scritchfield, RD, ofWashington, D.C., the author of Body Kindness. “So we make irrational choices: eating ice cream straight

out of the container instead of savoring just one dish; two glasses of wine, not one.”

Not that scraping the bottom of the Nutella jar is the end of the world. “There’s nothing wrong with treating yourself to a big bowl of ice cream or a gourmet cupcake,” says Scritchfield. “But all too often, we’re mindlessly engaging in these behaviors night after night, not

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truly enjoying them and sometimes waking up feeling guilty about them, which is the opposite of how me time should leave us feeling.”

Your mom probably didn’t have these me-time issues— maybe because there hasn’t always been an expectation that women deserve time to themselves in the first place. In today’s world, where self-care is the buzzword du jour, we know better. But while we’re trying to carve out more time to decompress, modern life has become the opposite of a decompression chamber. There are emails around the clock, overscheduled kids begging for homework help, and panic-inducing politics all over your Facebook feed. (Where did all the cute babies go?!)

Look, we need time to relax; done right, it enhances our productivity, creativity, and concentration. Research from the University of Michigan shows that lacking enough me time can be more detrimental to a couple’s relationship than problems with their sex life. Try these strategies to make those postdinner, pre-bed hours a little less of a regretfest.

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S T R AT E GY 1

S T R AT E GY 2

JUST GO TO BED

PRES S PAUSE ON THAT TREAT

Y E S , W E K N O W it sounds crazy. But stay with us. When the National Sleep Foundation asked women how many days in the previous week they’d woken up feeling well rested, nearly one out of four said zero.

“Without the six to nine hours they may need each night, people become prone to irritability, exacerbations of depression and anxiety, increased appetite, and sugar cravings,” says Lisa Medalie, PsyD, a behavioral sleep medicine specialist at the University of Chicago. “Sleep deprivation even increases vulnerability to diabetes and hypertension.”

To help prioritize sleep, try reframing early bedtime as a treat. Experts call it “cognitive restructuring,” and it means switching from thinking “I don’t have time for sleep; I have too much to do” to “Sleep is the best thing I can do for myself. If I go to bed now, I’ll feel so much better tomorrow.” Your reasoning doesn’t even have to be that virtuous.

Alexandra Williams, a 58-year-old photographer and night owl from Santa Barbara, California, says she has motivated herself to turn in early by promising to bake Dutch baby pancakes for her son in the morning or “telling myself that it would make my eyes look good for a date I was going on.”

If slipping between the sheets during prime time seems unimaginable, schedule a bedcentric activity that satisfies your me-time goal. Been alone with the kids all day and need intellectual stimulation? Read a book in bed and obey your eyelids when they grow heavy. Got a partner you haven’t seen since 6 a.m.? Have sex or cuddle in bed and talk.

FO OD C A N B E an important part of self-care, as long as you enjoy it mindfully (e.g., savoring the taste and texture of that Girl Scout cookie, not devouring it while you zone out in front of the computer). But you don’t want what you consume at night to leave you feeling physically or emotionally uncomfortable the next morning. If it does, institute a short waiting period of at least 15 minutes, suggests Melissa Hartwig, author of Food Freedom Forever: Letting Go of Bad Habits, Guilt, and Anxiety Around Food. “Tell yourself, ‘I’m an adult; I can have these chips anytime I want.

They’ll be here tomorrow for me, too.’ You’ll be giving your brain time to evaluate whether you truly want the salt-and-vinegar chips or are just bored, stressed, or tired.”

S T R AT E GY 3

FIND NEW WAYS TO SOOTHE W H I L E YO U ’ R E in your waiting period, try options for recharging without snacks: a can of sparkling water or tea, a mud mask and 30 minutes of a tacky TV show, a gentle yoga routine. The key is to spend me time doing something you really want to do, says Ramani Durvasula, PhD, a psychology professor at California State University, Los Angeles. “While it’s important that it doesn’t turn into a wine-induced Cheetos-fest every night, it is important that it feels like an escape,” she says. “If you can’t stand how tea tastes, it won’t work.”

“ We s p e n d s o m u c h e n e r g y and time focused on p r o d u c t i v i t y t h a t we n o l o n g e r r e c o g n i ze f u n w h e n we s e e i t . ”

WO M A N : G EO R G E M A R K S / R E T R O F I L E / G E T T Y I M AG E S ; F LOW E R S : I STO C K / G E T T Y I M AG E S ( 2 ) ; B AT H T U B : I S T O C K / G E T T Y I M A G E S ; S K Y : A R N E PA S T O O R / S T O C K 4 B / G E T T Y I M A G E S

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a bedside table. Before you open any app, ask yourself, “Why am I doing this?” If you’re feeling lonely—a wildly common driver of late-night scrolling, says Durvasula—use your phone to call someone, or have a conversation with your partner or roommate…who’s maybe in another room on the phone, too.

S T R AT E GY 6

FIND OTHER T IME FOR ME TIME

S T R AT E GY 4

S T R AT E GY 5

FL IP YOUR WORK SCHEDULE UP SIDE D OWN

SWEAR OFF SURFING AND SCROLL ING

H O M E - D E C O R AT I N G B L O G G E R and mom of three Serena Appiah, 39, of Silver Spring, Maryland, used to stay up until 1 a.m., slogging through work projects with the TV on and convincing herself this was quality me time. “But the later it got, the less productive I became, so it took twice as long to write blog posts or edit videos,” she admits.

Plus, “I’d be so tired in the morning, I’d fall asleep at my desk or even at a stoplight.”

Her fix: Swap all-nighters for earlymorning work sessions. “I started waking up at 5:15 a.m. to blog for about three hours,” she says. “I’m insanely productive because no one else is up, and it’s far easier to avoid email, TV, and social media.” At 8 a.m., Appiah switches into mom mode, showering and getting the kids ready for school. Thanks to this giant head start on her day, her evening hours are freed up for watching This Is Us or Scandal, then hitting the sack by 10 p.m.

of a single sleep specialist who would stamp approval on looking at the news or social media before bed,” says Medalie. Blue screen light suppresses the sleepinducing hormone melatonin, and news reports can rev you up so much that your stress response kicks in. Some research shows that social media doesn’t necessarily leave us feeling happy; rather, “it confirms our feelings of ‘I’m not good enough,’” notes Durvasula.

Pare back using the Freedom app ($7 a month; freedom.to), which blocks websites and social media from your devices, or Unplugged (free; iTunes), which puts your phone in airplane mode for a prescribed length of time. Position your charging station somewhere in your home that is incompatible with lounging, suggests Melissa Gratias, PhD, a psychologist in Savannah, Georgia, who specializes in productivity.

A kitchen counter or cabinet is better than

“I CAN’T THINK

F O R L AT E R S A B L A K E LY of Holly Grove, Arkansas, me time takes place twice a week at Barnes & Noble, between 1 p.m. and 2 p.m.—after her part-time shift as a hotel front-desk assistant ends but before her kids finish school. “I order a latte or water, settle into a comfy window chair, and lose myself in motivational, spiritual, and business books,” says Blakely, 39, who also works as a life coach.

Gratias likes this idea because it pairs a relaxing pursuit with a time of day when your energy naturally tends to dip, so in general you’ll feel calmer. If you’re a stayat-home parent, you may want to slate your me time during the kids’ early-afternoon nap times. If you’re working, use your lunch hour to listen to a podcast, text with a friend, pick up a new lipstick, or take a walk near some water or through a park.

S T R AT E GY 7

HAVE FUN!

much energy and time focused on productivity that we no longer recognize fun when we see it,” says Scritchfield. Make a list of some hobbies you love but never seem to have time for. Then use your me time to dive in. If you enjoy baking, make some biscotti. If you miss playing basketball, shoot hoops in the driveway.

Appiah paints furniture she scored while thrift shopping. Scritchfield plays Cards Against Humanity with her husband. Anything that makes you laugh or brings you joy will turn me time into happy hour— margarita optional. Q “WE SPEND SO

© AS America, inc. 2017.

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Ahhh...

A good way to come back to yourself when stress overwhelms you is to pay attention to your senses.

Become aware of what your hands are touching right now: this magazine, each other, something else? Feel your skin against the other surface. Close your eyes for a while and focus on that sensation and your breathing. Then gently open your eyes and look around you. Notice the different colors you see, the furniture, pictures, or plants. Let your gaze linger on something you’re attracted to. What feels good about it? Is it calming, energizing, inspiring? How does your body respond?

Does your tension ease? Does your heart feel a little softer?

Whatever good feeling you are having, let your breath come to meet it and luxuriate in it for a moment. Rest and enjoy.

P H OTO G R A P H BY T R I N E T T E R EED / STO C K SY

B Y M A R G A R E T T O W N S E N D, T H E L I V I N G B R E AT H .C O M

JUNE 2017

PROP ST YL ING BY ANGEL A CAMPOS

It Feels So Good to Get It Done

J U N E 2017

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We all have those tasks that never seem to get accomplished, lingering on our plate like the last shrimp on the party platter. These pages will help you understand why you’re avoiding certain to-dos and cross them off your list for good. Now all that’s hanging over your head is blue skies.

Photographs by C o r e y O l s e n

Finally paint your bedroom 1 WE TEND TO put off painting a bedroom, because guests rarely visit it. But it’s the first space you see every morning and the last one you see at night. Break the project into four steps to make a color refresh a breeze.

Prep the space.

Wipe the walls with a sponge dipped in soapy water to get rid of dust and dirt.

Use painter’s tape to protect the ceiling and trim areas.

2

Using a roller dipped in a paint tray filled with primer, paint the walls vertically until evenly coated. Let dry completely (at least three hours).

3

Tackle the area near the trim: Dip the tip of an angled brush into the paint and run it along the edge of the wall, feathering it out about three inches from the tape.

4

Roll paint onto the wall in overlapping three-foot W shapes until it’s covered. Remove the tape while the paint is wet.

—STEPHANIE SISCO

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WHY WE DON’T

Just deal with that giant pile of mail already

$

10

0 $

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“ M A N Y P E O P L E AVO I D mail because they have an underlying

fear that if they go through the mail too quickly, they’ll throw out something crucial,” says Susan Bartell, PsyD, a psychologist in Port Washington, New York, who specializes in life balance. “But seeing that pile on the kitchen counter is anxiety-provoking. It’s a reminder of all the stuff you haven’t taken care of yet, which feels overwhelming.”

Discipline yourself to tackle mail sooner and it will be less stressinducing, says Bartell. Train yourself to go through it as soon as it’s in your hand and immediately throw out the obvious junk.

(Place a recycling bin in the garage or near the front door to prompt you.) “Very quickly, your pile will be less daunting,” she says. It’s easier to make quick decisions if you keep your sorting system simple: Bills go in one pile, invitations or anything else of value go in a second pile, and the rest gets tossed on the spot. Keep the “holding pen” from growing too big by sticking to a regular routine of responding to (or filing) those pieces. “Once a month works well for some people; others do it weekly—say, every Sunday night while watching TV,” says Bartell. “The more you can make it a routine, the better.” —B E T S Y G O L D B E R G

Decide on window 2 5 -W O R D T I P

t r e a t m e nt s

WINDOWS AS NAKED AS THE DAY YOU MOVED IN? GET UNSTUCK WITH IDEAS FROM DESIGNER ELAINE GRIFFIN.

I F YO U H AV E A B O U T $ 10 0 Ready-made curtain panels that are twice the width of your window give the illusion of a larger opening. Lowe’s and Bed Bath & Beyond have great selections.

I F YO U H AV E A B O U T $ 3 5 0 A custom Roman shade has a high-end feel without a high price. Try Smith & Noble for quality shades that arrive in about three weeks.

It’s worth it to pay $40 annually for an app (like Dashlane or 1Password) that keeps all your online log-in information in a secure place.

I F YO U H AV E $ 5 0 0 OR MORE Combine form and function with two layers of window coverings. To control light, use wood slat blinds from Lowe’s or motorized roller shades in a neutral color from The Shade Store. Then add curtains for decoration. Curtains should start one inch below the ceiling and extend 5 to 12 inches past the window on both sides. —S.S.

I L L U S T R AT I O N S B Y L E O N E D L E R

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0

Bring order to the cords “ I S N ’ T T H I S T H E cord to the PS2? We

don’t have a PS2 anymore. Or is this the cord to the photo printer?” I am in our home office talking to my husband, who has stopped listening. I don’t blame him.

We supposedly live in a wireless world, but we have a drawer full of cords. Most of the time I’m scared to look inside. The contents look back at me like cyber snakes.

There are black cords, white cords, a thin, clear cord with even thinner colored cords inside. That one’s actually kind of pretty, but what does it click into? No one knows, and yet we can’t make ourselves toss them.

My husband has more cord-based gear than I do, and I feel certain that the cord I threw away is the one he needs right now to do this important thing for work. This is one of those tasks that are doubly difficult because they can’t be done solo. It’s not just cord culling; it’s a conversation. So it’s easy to put off. Who wants to spend quality time talking about cords?

Sometimes I have the conversation in my head in advance and realize, eh, I don’t want to use my relationship currency to pin my husband down on this project. It’s

1

Control email YOU DON’T HAVE TO AIM FOR “INBOX ZERO,” SAYS JOCELYN GLEI, AUTHOR OF UNSUBSCRIBE.

Use Unroll.me to scan your inbox for e-newsletters and marketing messages, then unsubscribe or roll those you do want into a daily digest.

about as fulfilling as figuring out a new spice rack system. Sometimes I don’t want to have that conversation—or that marriage.

Sometimes I just roll with it and let the spices fall (literally) where they may. So we do what we can.

Recently we confronted the drawer, organizing and labeling the cords with painter’s tape and moving them into a pretty pink box from Ikea. It’s all very orderly—for now.

But I know the cords will multiply, and when I tilt open the pink lid they will stare back like mean spaghetti, their labels gone, daring me to do something. And we will break for wine and then start again. — L E S L I E Y A Z E L

2

Add the free Chrome extension Inbox When Ready: It temporarily hides your Gmail inbox so you won’t be constantly interrupted. (Most email can wait.)

3

Curb your cc compulsion. You can’t ban people from cc’ing you on everything, but you can shift expectations by stopping the cc’ing yourself.

2 5 -W O R D T I P

Been meaning to preserve your old photos?

Digitize all your printed images with a service like ScanMyPhotos .com and back them up on a cloudbased system.

4

Tackle email in the stray 10 minutes between other tasks. When you have 20-plus minutes, do a task that requires more focus.

—KATE ROCKWOOD

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Lose T h o s e L a s t F i ve Pounds

FIVE WOMEN SHARE THE TWEAK THAT TILTED THE SCALE IN THE RIGHT DIRECTION.

WHY WE DON’T

Get all the laundry done THE BIGGEST REASON we lose track of laundry

midway through the process can be summarized by the adage “Out of sight, out of mind,” explains Meg Selig, author of Changepower! 37 Secrets to Habit Change Success. “Once laundry is in the washer or dryer, it requires effort to remember it. So set up a cue to remind yourself that it’s in there, like leaving the laundry basket on your favorite chair. That way you’ll think, ‘Before I sit down, I should switch the laundry to the dryer.’ ” It also helps to find ways to make the task more pleasant, adds Julie Bestry, a pro organizer and productivity specialist: “Get rid of any clutter in the laundry room and install a valet hook, a rolling clothes rack, or a retractable clothesline. In your closets, move all the empty hangers to one area so you can hang up your clean clothes more easily.” — B . G .

E AT W I T H A N AU DI E N C E “I have a 2-year-old and a 4-year-old, and I cook pretty healthy meals. But I realized that whenever my kids would go down for bedtime or naps, I would crash on the couch with a ton of junk food. Instead of swearing off specific foods, I decided I wouldn’t eat when they’re asleep. Now I don’t eat nearly as much junk.”—Liz Prowell, Frederick, Maryland LO O K F O R S N E A KY S U G A R “I wanted to drop a few pounds for an upcoming girls’ trip, but I didn’t want to deal with counting calories or tracking food. At first I planned to just avoid chocolate, because I know the little handfuls of chocolate chips from the pantry or the afternoon cookie add up. But then I started looking at more labels and was floored by how many products have a ton of added sugar in them. I decided to skip anything with added sugar, and I could feel the difference in how my clothes fit within a week.” —Jamie Mummey, Minster, Ohio

P L AT E E V E RY B I T E “It’s crazy how easy it is to eat a small meal while you cook—a nibble of this here, a taste of that there. And then as I’m serving, I might have an extra bite or two.

I vowed to stop eating anything that wasn’t from my own plate at the table, and that one change made a real difference on the scale.”

—Mary Yarashefski, Chicago S EC O N D - G U E S S YO U R HUNGER “Slowly changing my mind-set around food has made the biggest difference. When I want to eat something specific, I’ve started asking myself, ‘Am I hungry, or do I just think that will taste good?’ If it’s a craving, that doesn’t mean it’s off-limits!

But I’ll have just a bite and really savor it, then pop in a piece of gum. I feel like this is something I can keep up.”

—Christine Michaleski, Virden, Manitoba, Canada C R A N K U P T H E F L AVO R “Just because a food is lowcalorie doesn’t mean I want to eat it. I started scouting the grocery store aisles for new foods that have a ton of flavor without many calories. Right now I’m obsessed with harissa, the North African hot chile spread. Adding a little bit to some crackers and veggies makes the perfect lunch.” —Clare Vickery, Chicago —K .R.

Bring your lunch Packing a midday meal doesn’t require waking up an hour earlier, provided you have the right supplies on hand.

B ROW N -BAG G I NG is one of those things we know are virtuous—thrifty, healthy, timesaving—and yet many of us end up eating takeout anyway. So try focusing less on being virtuous and more on making lunch delicious. Stock up on ingredients you know you’ll enjoy eating. There’s no point buying a ton of lettuce for salads if you’re more of a hot-lunch gal. If you like sandwiches, load up on your favorite bread and a variety of fixings over the weekend and cut up some vegetables the night before. Toss them into your lunch bag for a balanced meal.

Some lunches you can—and should—prep in advance. Hearty greens like kale will soften slightly if dressed ahead of time,

and leftover soup always improves with age. If you do assemble in the a.m., set yourself up for success before bed. Clear off the cutting board and lay out whatever equipment you might need, including the container you plan to pack your lunch in (see page 171 for some of our favorites).

At work, stash shelf-stable condiments— olive oil, hot sauce, salt and pepper—and use those to perk up salads, soups, or homemade burritos. You can grab lemon wedges from most delis or coffee shops if your office doesn’t have a cafeteria, and packets of honey, Dijon, and even chile flakes and Parmesan are available at many grab-and-go lunch joints. — D A W N P E R R Y

J U N E 2017

Brush up your baubles A professional cleaning can remove dir t, fix damage, and identif y loose settings. Don’t wait until a valuable stone is lost forever.

C H A NC E S A R E , you’ve got at least one nice piece of jewelry—whether it’s a wedding ring, a family heirloom, or a pair of studs—that could use a little more attention than it normally gets. Daily wear can result in dings and loosened settings, while contact with corrosive materials, like sweat, perfume, and other jewelry, can dull even the shiniest sparklers over time. Diamonds and gold are easy to clean at home with a few drops of dish soap dissolved in warm water, and specialty cleaning cloths for sterling silver are readily available. Costume pieces can be spot-treated with a damp cloth—avoid soap or cleansers, as they may cause discoloration or break down the glue used in settings.

At least once a year, a thorough professional cleaning is a good idea for fine jewelry. (And for some materials—like delicate gemstones and pearls, which can be ruined by homemade or commercial solutions—it’s necessary.) To keep yourself on track with this task, browse jewelers.org for a recommended professional in your area, then schedule a cleaning just before your anniversary or any other important annual event where you’d like your bijou to shine. That way, you’ll have extra motivation not to skip it. — R E B E C C A D A L Y

2 5 -W O R D T I P

To s s

I T EM

DI TC H I T A F T ER

Anti-aging or acne cream

Six months

Body lotion

Two years

Eyeliner and mascara

Three months

Foundation and concealer

One year

Masks and peels

Three months

Old Beauty Loot

—CHELSE A BURNS

J U N E 2017

To clear out unneeded clothes, print free shipping labels at givebackbox .com. Send the items off to charity and you’ll get a tax receipt in return.

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1. Grab a freshly sharpened creamy black eyeliner and draw a small wing, starting at the outer corner of your eye.

2. Make small dashes across your top lash line, working from the outer corner to the inner corner.

3. Goofed? Dip a cotton swab (the precision ones are great for detailing) in makeup remover and use it to erase any smudges, overly thick lines, or uneven wings.

4. To lock in and intensify the look, go over the cream eyeliner with a liquid one.

5. Apply a few coats of mascara on top lashes, wiggling at the roots to boost volume.

Part with gift cards W E C A L L E D I T the magic drawer: a spot in a bedroom bookcase where, instead of junk, my husband and I began stashing stuff that made us happy. Passports. Checkbooks.

And gift cards—so many gift cards.

The cards piled up so high that we could hardly pry the drawer open. We just never seemed to use them. I had iTunes cards, but no music ever seemed worthy of cashing them in. Not even Hamilton! Call it the Lord of the Rings effect: By imbuing the drawer with magical properties, we had made its contents feel too precious to part with.

It’s a fancy problem, granted, but also a common one. One estimate found that $973 million in gift cards went unspent in 2015, and a thriving online marketplace has popped up to help people buy and sell them. In the bottom of my drawer were discounts for Gymboree classes for my now school-age kids; a pass to the President’s Club of Continental Airlines, which merged with

United seven years ago; and an expired coupon for free Spanx. How could I have passed up a chance to get free Spanx? I vowed to clear the drawer out.

I started small, at Starbucks. I masked my embarrassment with a shrug and a smile—“I found this ancient gift card, and I have no idea how much is on it!”—and it turned out I had more than enough for an egg sandwich and a Venti. When I discovered $87 left on a partly used restaurant gift certificate, my husband and I booked a date night and toasted to the wine being free.

I’m thrifty (OK, cheap), but shopping with gift cards somehow made a mini splurge easier. I pooled my iTunes cards and got a membership to Apple Music. I spent some Pottery Barn credit on a faux-fur pillow that my kindergartner promptly adopted; then I used the remaining credit on another one so we wouldn’t have to fight over it.

I got a massage (thanks to an old friend) and a pile of Sephora products (courtesy of my mother-in-law). It felt great, and not only for greedy reasons. I realized that not using my gift cards had been ungracious.

Enjoying the givers’ generosity made me feel connected to them.

The magic drawer is a useful organizing technique because you never want to treat your blessings like junk. But the real magic lies in making its contents disappear.

—SARA AUSTIN

A Cat Eye

Learn the beauty basics you should have picked up at summer camp

An At- H o m e Mani

1. Remove existing polish, then put a dab of oil on cuticles.

2. Shape nails, filing in only one direction to avoid weakening them.

3. Push back cuticles with an orange wood stick.

4. Moisturize hands, then wipe nails with polish remover. This helps your polish adhere better.

5. Apply a base coat, two coats of color, and a topcoat, letting nails dry thoroughly between coats. —C.B.

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Contribute to your Roth IRA; contributions made up until the tax deadline are applicable for the previous tax year.

Return forgotten library books during National Library Week. Some libraries offer an amnesty day during the year when fines are forgiven; call your branch for information.

Make special reservations for Valentine’s Day well before the 14th so you’ll have your pick of a good table.

File the Free Application for Federal Student Aid (FAFSA) for college-bound kids if you haven’t already. The deadline for 2017 fall funding is the end of this month.

Book your summer getaway this month to avoid springtime price hikes.

JA N U A R Y

F E B R UARY

Plan health appointments for the rest of the year.

See “Schedule the Health Tests You Need This Year,” opposite page.

Start on your taxes now—typically, the earlier you file, the earlier any refund you’re due will arrive.

MARCH

Have winter shoes polished and reheeled before you pack them away.

Early spring is a good time to buy, service, or reinstall an air conditioner— before it gets hot.

Bring your bike in for a tune-up so you’ll be ready to ride on that first warm day.

APRIL

M AY

JUNE

Get your chimney cleaned and inspected. Doing so in the summer allows ample time if repairs are needed.

Clean and open a home pool, if you have one. Summer’s almost here!

Mark your

Schedule the Health Tests You Need This Year

Recommendations here, from the U.S. Preventive Services Task Force, are for healthy people at no increased risk of these conditions.

I N YO U R 2 0 s

I N YO U R 4 0 s C er v i c a l c a n c e r p l u s H PV: Every five years.

C h l a mydi a a n d g o n o r r h e a : Annually if you

have a new partner or multiple partners.

T y p e 2 d i a b ete s : Talk to your doctor about screening if you are overweight.

C er v i c a l c a n c e r ( P a p te s t ) :

Every three years.

I N YO U R 5 0 s A N D B E YO N D

C h l a mydi a a n d g o n o r r h e a : Annually if

C er v i c a l c a n c e r p lu s H PV: Every five years.

C h l a mydi a a n d g o n o r r h e a : Annually if you

you’re sexually active; after age 25, annually if you have a new sexual partner or more than one partner.

I N YO U R 3 0 s C er v i c a l c a n c e r p l u s H PV s c r e e n i n g :

Every five years.

C h l a mydi a a n d g o n o r r h e a :

C L O C K W I S E F R O M T O P L E F T : R O S E S , L I L I B O A S / G E T T Y I M A G E S ; P E N C I L S , C AT H E R I N E M A C B R I D E / G E T T Y I M A G E S ; C AT, K I P U X A / I S T O C K / G E T T Y I M A G E S P L U S ; VA N , F O T O V O YA G E R / G E T T Y I M A G E S ; P O O L , R A S S L AVA / I S T O C K / G E T T Y I M A G E S P L U S ; A L A R M C L O C K , B A O N A / I S T O C K / G E T T Y I M A G E S P L U S

Annually if you have a new sexual partner or more than one partner.

J U LY

have a new partner or multiple partners.

M a m m o g r a m : Every two years.

C o lo r e ct a l c a n c er : Start at age 50; consult your doctor about frequency of testing.

T y p e 2 d i a b ete s : Talk to your doctor about screening if you are overweight.

B o n e den s i t y te s t : Start at age 65; consult your doctor about frequency of testing. —K .R.

Call or write to an old friend to honor Friendship Day on the 6th.

Get your annual flu shot before winter germs begin to circulate.

Take Fido for his checkup.

If your furry friend has a microchip, August 15 is Check the Chip Day.

Start the FAFSA application (it’s time-consuming!) if you have a child starting college in fall 2018.

AU G U S T

SEPTEMBER

Turn off your sprinklers and winterize your yard before temperatures first drop below freezing.

Buy or order school supplies to avoid the latenight stampede at your local office-supply store.

O CTOBER

NOVEMBER

Make your final 529 contribution and charitable donations at the beginning of this month to ensure they’re deductible on your 2017 tax return.

Never got that flu shot? You still can—in the U.S., flu season can last as late as May.

DECEMBER

Take your car for its tuneup now to help prevent a breakdown during a long holiday drive.

If possible, sign your kids up for summer camp to take advantage of early-bird prices. Spots fill up fast.

Order custom holiday cards before the season is in full swing.

calendar Make a year’s worth of appointments…today!

—N O R A H O R V A T H J U N E 2017

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Declutter your kids’ art—3 ways

1

Pluck some from the pile to turn into abstract art.

Focus on just one part of the picture—say, a giant flower, the sun, or any interesting shape—and cut out that piece to hang in a smaller frame.

2

Create a rotating gallery wall in a playroom or your kid’s bedroom. Use washi tape to hang pictures in a grid, about two to three inches apart—it’s easily removable, so your kids can change up the composition and swap in new pieces.

3

File away favorites and keep the rest in a medium-size bin to use as gift wrap or repurpose as tags. (Cut into a tag shape, hole-punch, and insert twine to attach to the gift.)

—RACHAEL WE INER

Face down your future— fearlessly Most people find death too depressing to talk about. But that denial has a huge price, and it’s loved ones lef t behind who will pay.

T H E B I G G E S T L E S S O N I learned when my mom died unexpectedly was that we were equally unprepared for her demise. The daunting task of dismantling her life fell solely to me. When I was in this wilderness of grief, the last thing I wanted to do was figure out what bills needed paying. But my mom wasn’t there to answer the million questions that came up, like where was her car title? What was her iPhone lock code? How could I get into her bank account to pay for her cremation?

I knew I had to prevent others from going through what I went through, so I created an advance planning company—I call it Good to Go!—to try to change how we view death preparedness. With potluck dishes and cocktails (talking about the hard stuff means you need to drink the hard stuff), I guide people through the paperwork they will leave their loved ones, from medical directives to social media passwords. I now sell a “Departure File” ($55; goodtogopeace.org) that helps you compile personal information all in one place.

My healthy 71-year-old dad came to a Good to Go! party. A year later, he was admitted to the ICU and died after six days. During his hospital stay, I didn’t have to make a single gut-wrenching decision, because I knew his wishes. His willingness to face the uncomfortable topic of dying in advance allowed me the emotional space I needed to focus on his life and his love for me. He even wrote his own obituary.

My dad and I had a lot of laughs while we prepared for his death. As we went through his bills, listening to ’50s music and eating pizza, I asked him if there was anything in his house that he wanted me to keep after he died. He said, “Not really. You can get rid of it all.” And with that, he eliminated any guilt I might have faced about selling his home after he died.

Write down your own wishes. Talk about them with loved ones. No one regrets the decision to plan for their death. — A M Y P I C K A R D

2 5 -W O R D T I P

Paper person? Corral receipts on a spindle like the ones used in restaurants. App happy?

Slot scanned or electronic receipts into yearly Notebooks with Evernote.

For more Get It Done projects and advice, visit realsimple.com/getitdone.

J U N E 2017

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MELON WITH CITRUS, MINT, AND PINK PEPPERCORNS

TA S T E S L I K E S U M M E R

R E C I P E S B Y D AW N P E R R Y P H O T O G R A P H S B Y GREG DUPREE

JUNE 2017

CUCUMBERS WITH FRIED AND PICKLED SHALLOTS

The produce you’ve been waiting for is finally here: tomatoes, corn, zucchini, melons.

We’ve got the 6 essential recipes for showing it off.

GREEN BEANS WITH MISO, MUSTARD, AND WALNUTS

139

2-INGREDIENT CORN SOUP WITH BROWN BUTTER SEEDS

JUNE 2017

T O M AT O E S WITH RICOTTA AND HERBS

JUNE 2017

141

MELON

GREEN BEANS

WITH CITRUS, MINT, AND PINK PEPPERCORNS

WITH MISO, MUSTARD, AND WALNUTS

ACT I V E T I M E 1 5 M I N U T E S TOTA L T I M E 1 5 M I N U T E S SERVES 6

1 small cantaloupe, rind removed, seeded and thinly sliced 2 navel oranges

CUCUMBERS WITH FRIED AND PICKLED SHALLOTS ACT I V E T I M E 3 0 M I N U T E S TOTA L T I M E 3 0 M I N U T E S S E R V E S 4 TO 6

1 lime

cup rice vinegar

1 tsp. pink peppercorns, coarsely chopped Small handful of fresh mint leaves 2 Tbsp. olive oil Flaky salt, for serving cantaloupe on a platter.

ARRANGE

peel and pith from oranges using a sharp paring knife. Working directly over the platter, cut between membranes to release the orange segments over cantaloupe.

Squeeze juice from remaining membranes.

CUT

the lime over the cantaloupe using a microplane or the small holes of a box grater. Cut the lime in half and squeeze juice over fruit, tossing gently to coat. Sprinkle with pink peppercorns, top with mint, drizzle with oil, and season with flaky salt.

ZEST

For half a dozen more ways to dish up cantaloupe, go to realsimple.com/melon.

1 tsp. sugar 1

tsp. kosher salt, plus more to taste Freshly ground black pepper 3 medium shallots, thinly sliced into rings (about 1 cup), divided 1 lb. Persian cucumbers, thinly sliced Small handful of fresh dill sprigs, torn cup vegetable oil

vinegar, sugar, 1 teaspoons salt, and several grinds of pepper in a small saucepan. Bring to a boil; add half of the shallots and stir to coat them in the liquid. Remove from heat and set aside until softened, about 10 minutes.

COMBINE

cucumbers, dill, and pickled shallots with the pickling liquid in a large bowl.

Season to taste and set aside.

TO S S

oil and remaining half of shallots in a small saucepan.

Place over medium heat and cook, swirling occasionally, until shallots are golden brown, 8 to 10 minutes. Remove from heat and, using a slotted spoon, transfer fried shallots to a paper towel–lined plate; season with a pinch of salt. Reserve 3 tablespoons of the frying oil.

COMBINE

ACT I V E T I M E 10 M I N U T E S TOTA L T I M E 2 0 M I N U T E S S E R V E S 4 TO 6

cup walnuts 2 Tbsp. olive oil, divided Kosher salt Freshly ground black pepper 1 lb. green beans or haricots verts, stem ends trimmed 1 Tbsp. white miso 1 Tbsp. Dijon mustard 1 Tbsp. rice vinegar tsp. honey oven to 350°F. Spread walnuts on a rimmed baking sheet and toast until a shade darker and nutty-smelling, 10 to 12 minutes. When cool enough to handle, roughly chop and toss with 1 tablespoon of the oil; season to taste with salt and pepper.

P R E H E AT

bring a large pot of salted water to a boil. Add green beans and cook until bright green and crisp-tender, about 3 minutes. Drain beans and transfer to a bowl filled with ice water to cool; drain and pat dry.

MEANWHILE,

W H I S K miso, mustard, vinegar, honey, 1 tablespoon water, teaspoon salt, remaining 1 tablespoon oil, and several grinds of pepper in a large bowl.

Add green beans and toss to coat. Transfer to a platter and top with toasted walnuts.

cucumber mixture with reserved oil and top with fried shallots.

TO S S

JUNE 2017

142

2-INGREDIENT CORN SOUP

CREAMY ZUCCHINI

WITH BROWN BUTTER SEEDS

TOASTS

ACT I V E T I M E 3 0 M I N U T E S TOTA L T I M E 4 5 M I N U T E S SERVES 6 (MAKES 5 CUPS)

ACT I V E T I M E 10 M I N U T E S TOTA L T I M E 1 H O U R S E R V E S 4 TO 6

8 ears corn, shucked

2 medium zucchini, very thinly sliced (about 3 cups)

cup (1 sticks) unsalted butter, divided

1 tsp. kosher salt

Freshly ground black pepper

cup mayonnaise

T O M AT O E S WITH RICOTTA AND HERBS

1 Tbsp. sunflower seeds 1 Tbsp. sesame seeds 1 tsp. whole coriander seeds

ACT I V E T I M E 2 0 M I N U T E S TOTA L T I M E 2 0 M I N U T E S S E R V E S 4 TO 6

Flaky salt, for serving 8 oz. fresh ricotta with 1 cob at a time, lay corn flat on a work surface and use a sharp knife to cut kernels away from cob (see page 46 for illustrated steps); reserve cobs. Melt 1 stick of the butter in a large saucepan over medium. When foam subsides, add corn kernels and cook, stirring often, until beginning to soften, about 3 minutes.

Add kosher salt, several grinds of pepper, corn cobs, and 6 cups water to saucepan and bring to a boil.

WO R K I N G

heat to simmer and cook, stirring occasionally, until corn is tender and liquid is slightly reduced, 20 to 22 minutes; let cool slightly and discard cobs.

Using a slotted spoon, transfer corn to a blender. Add 2 cups of the corn cooking water to blender and puree until very smooth, adding more a little at a time to reach desired consistency. Set aside.

REDUCE

remaining 4 tablespoons butter in a small skillet over medium. When foam subsides, add sunflower seeds, sesame seeds, and coriander and cook, swirling often, until butter is brown and nutty-smelling, about 2 minutes. Remove from heat.

M E LT

soup warm or chilled topped with brown butter seed mixture. Season with flaky salt.

S E RV E

JUNE 2017

2 Tbsp. heavy cream 2 Tbsp. olive oil, plus more for drizzling tsp. kosher salt, plus more to taste tsp. black pepper, plus more to taste 2 lb. heirloom or other large tomatoes, sliced to inch thick Flaky salt, for serving 1 cup fresh tender herbs, such as basil, chives, and mint ricotta, cream, oil, and teaspoon each kosher salt and pepper in the bowl of a food processor; process until smooth and creamy, scraping down sides of bowl as needed.

COMBINE

ricotta cream in a thin layer on a serving platter and top with tomatoes.

Season tomatoes with flaky salt and several grinds of pepper. Drizzle with oil and top with herbs.

SPREAD

cup grated Pecorino Romano 1 clove garlic, finely chopped or grated 1 tsp. Worcestershire sauce tsp. hot sauce 6 scallions, thinly sliced, divided 12 slices thin pumpernickel, rye, white, or whole wheat bread Freshly ground black pepper

oven to 375°F. Combine zucchini and salt in a large bowl and toss to coat; set aside until salt draws out a decent amount of liquid from zucchini, about 15 minutes. Pour off liquid and transfer zucchini to a few layers of paper towel or a clean dish towel. Roll up zucchini and gently press to absorb as much liquid as possible.

P R E H E AT

C O M B I N E mayonnaise, cheese, garlic, Worcestershire, hot sauce, and 4 of the scallions and stir to combine. Fold in zucchini. Arrange bread in a single layer on a rimmed baking sheet. Spread zucchini mixture thickly and evenly over bread.

B A K E until golden and bubbly, 30 to 35 minutes. Top with remaining scallions and a few grinds of pepper before cutting into wedges.

F O O D ST Y L I N G BY C H EL S E A Z I M M ER ; P R O P ST Y L I N G BY C L A I RE S P O L L EN

1 Tbsp. kosher salt

143

CREAMY ZUCCHINI TOASTS

t h e

h o t 1

1 0 0 SUMMER STYLE GETS REAL SIMPLE WITH THESE 100 FUN BUYS—ALL FOR $100 OR LESS. PHOTOGRAPHS BY GRANT CORNETT

J U N E 2017

FA S H I O N M A R K E T E D I T O R F L AV I A N U N E Z

145

2

1 Maybelline New York Color Sensational Creamy Mattes in Craving Coral, $7.50; at drugstores.

2 Deux Lux clutch, $90; deuxlux.com.

3

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11

6 10 9

12

8

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P R O P ST Y L I N G BY B E T I M B A L A M A N . S M A L L P H OTO G R A P H S BY J E F F W E ST B R O O K ; P R O P ST Y L I N G BY J U DI T H T R E Z Z A F O R R J B E N N E T T R E P R E S E N TS

16 13

15

14

18 22

24 20

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mix in metallics 3 Lulus clutch, $33; lulus.com. 4 Milani Strobelight Instant Glow Powder in Dayglow, $10; milanicosmetics.com. 5 Dolce Vita sandals, $75; dolcevita.com. 6 RD Style top, $60; at Boutique La Lune (408-560-9951). 7 Guess sneakers, $69; macys.com. 8 Catrice Liquid Metal Eyeshadow in Under Treasure, $5; ulta.com. 9 Joico Blonde Life Brightening Masque, $20; joico.com. 10 Boohoo jacket, $44; us.boohoo.com. 11 Lemonhead Spacepaste eye shadow in Silverlake, $22; getlemonhead.com. 12 White House Black Market sandals, $98; whbm.com. 13 A.V. Max cuff, $70; avmaxnyc.com.

14 Lulus dress, $57; lulus.com. 15 Paddywax Verbena + Patchouli Candle, $15; paddywax.com. 16 Cape Robbin sandals, $40; lulus.com. 17 Sterling Forever earrings, $50; sterlingforever.com. 18 Butter London Glazen Eye Gloss in Frosted, $24; butterlondon.com. 19 Nine West bag, $59; ninewest.com.

20 Smashbox Cosmetics Be Legendary Liquid Lip Metal in Mauve Squad, $24; smashbox.com. 21 Sephora Ready in 5 Eye Brush Set, $20; sephora.com.

22 Caress Evenly Gorgeous Body Wash, $4; target.com. 23 Stila Magnificent Metals Glitter and Glow Liquid Eyeshadow in Smoldering Satin, $24; sephora .com. 24 Skylar Belle skirt, $48; shopskylarbelle.com. 25 Quay Australia sunglasses, $60; quayaustralia.com. 26 Make Up For Ever Star Lit Liquid face highlighter in Gold Champagne, $24; makeupforever.com. 27 Nails Inc Sweet Almonds Powered by Matcha Nail Polish in Mayfair Market, $15; sephora.com.

J U N E 2017

28

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34 37 42

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43 38 40

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49 51 50

46

add (allll the) white 28 Nine West mules, $80; zappos.com. 29 Pono bracelet, $55; ponobyjoangoodman.com. 30 Essie Gel Couture nail polish in Lace to the Altar, $11.50; essie.com. 31 Eva Mendes Collection at New York & Company skirt, $70; nyandcompany.com. 32 CL by Laundry sandals, $50; chineselaundry.com. 33 Ted Rossi earrings, $98; tedrossi.com. 34 Cuvée Beauty Champagne texturizing spray, $12; cuveebeauty.com. 35 Aerie sweater, $40; aerie.com. 36 Fresh Citron de Vigne Moisturizing Hand Cream, $14; fresh.com. 37 ADMK Jewelry ring, $48; admkjewelry.com.

38 Sanctuary shorts, $69; sanctuaryclothing.com. 39 Sephora Collection Microsmooth Baked Luminizer, $7; sephora.com. 40 Lancôme Juicy Shaker lip gloss in Snow-Tilly, $22; lancome-usa.com. 41 Julian Taylor dress, $70; sears.com. 42 Urban Expressions tote, $110 (use code SUMMERFLORAL25 for 25 percent off any bag on the site); urbanexpressions.net. 43 Ciaté London Makeup Melter, $20; sephora.com. 44 The Body Shop Almond Milk & Honey Cleansing Bar, $5; thebodyshop.com. 45 Metaphor flats, $30; sears.com. 46 La Roche-Posay Thermal Spring Water facial mist, $13; target.com. 47 Simply Vera Vera Wang top, $50; kohls.com. 48 Target earrings, $10; target.com. 49 Gap sandals, $45; gap.com.

50 E.L.F. Massaging Eye Wand, $25; elfcosmetics.com. 51 Marled top, $68; bloomingdales.com.

J U N E 2017

52

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go bold 52 Katy Perry heels, $99; katyperrycollections.com. 53 L’Oréal Paris Infallible Paints Blush Kit, $17; at drugstores. 54 Côte Nail Polish in Nos. 113, 115, and 116, $18 each; coteshop.co. 55 Thalia Sodi for Macy’s dress, $99.50; macys.com. 56 Tommy Hilfiger watch, $75; usa.tommy.com.

57 Old Navy pants, $35; oldnavy.com. 58 Cynthia Rowley bag, $95; cynthiarowley.com. 59 Stila Convertible Color for lips and cheeks in Petunia, $25; sephora.com. 60 OleHenriksen Pure Nurture Facial Water, $22; sephora.com. 61 Cooper & Ella top, $99; cooperandella.com. 62 Rebecca Minkoff clutch, $95; rebeccaminkoff.com. 63 Karl Lagerfeld Paris top, $70; dillards.com. 64 DG Luxsport by Diane Gilman bag, $70; hsn.com. 65 Keds X Kate Spade New York sneakers, $85; keds.com. 66 Echo panama hat, $79; echodesign.com. 67 Hollywood Fashion Secrets Stylette Kit, $12; hollywood fashionsecrets.com. 68 Kitsch Hair Coils in Crush, $6 for 4; mykitsch.com. 69 Goody Bright Boost Extra Small Round Brush, $3.50; at Walmart.

70 Tatcha Exfoliating Camellia Soap, $15; tatcha.com. 71 BZR at Moorea Seal sunglasses, $40; mooreaseal.com. 72 Gorjana earrings, $50; gorjana.com.

73 Jones New York top, $80; jny.com. 74 Entourage top, $26; entourageclothing.com. 75 White House Black Market clutch, $98; whbm.com.

J U N E 2017

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pile on the pastels 76 French Connection bag, $88; nordstromrack.com. 77 Physicians Formula Mineral Wear Talc-Free Cushion Corrector + Primer Duo SPF 20, $17 each; at drugstores. 78 Rumba watch, $65; rumbatime.com. 79 Forever 21 jacket, $30; forever21.com. 80 Jules Kae pouch, $95; juleskae.com.

81 Charles by Charles David heels, $99; nordstrom.com. 82 Lack of Color hat, $59; lackofcolor.au. 83 Morning Lavender dress, $75; morninglavender.com. 84 Paddywax Rosé and Stardust Candle, $18; paddywax.com. 85 L.L. Bean shirt, $45; llbean.com. 86 Westport 1962 for Dressbarn pants, $28; dressbarn.com. 87 Fashionest earrings, $29; fashionest.com. 88 Fred Perry sneakers, $65; modcloth.com.

89 Sol Sana slides, $95; asos.com. 90 Youth to the People Youth Duo Mini cream (not shown) and cleanser, $20; sephora.com. 91 Kitsch Ice Castle Hair Ties, $9 for 5; mykitsch.com. 92 Sephora House of Lashes Art Nouveau Liquid Liner in Green with Envy, $17; sephora.com.

93 Modcloth top, $40; modcloth.com. 94 E.L.F. Gentle Peeling Exfoliant, $10; elfcosmetics.com. 95 R.J. Graziano necklace, $75; rjgraziano.com.

96 Donni Charm headband, $66; donnicharm.com. 97 Cocofloss in Delicious Mint, $8; goop.com. 98 Club Monaco shorts, $90; clubmonaco.com.

99 OPI Infinite Shine nail polish in In Pursuit of Purple, $12.50; ulta.com. 100 Design History top, $80; designhistoryny.com.

J U N E 2017

155

R E A L L Y, T R U L Y L I Z Z Y

BY CURTIS SITTENFELD

THE

WO M A N WHO MADE ME WHO I AM*

*SHE’S FICTIONAL!

BEHIND EVERY STRONG, SMART WOMAN, THERE’S AN INSPIRING CHARACTER WHO HELPED M O T I VAT E H E R T O B E HERSELF AND

ERIC HEGL AS

BE HE ARD.

O S S I B LY T H E A L L -T I M E best compliment I’ve received was when two boys in high school told me I reminded them of Elizabeth Bennet. We were reading Pride and Prejudice, a task so delightful I couldn’t believe it was homework. I loved the book. Lizzy was funny, smart, stubborn, and down-to-earth. Did I possess those qualities? Maybe, if you overlooked my aura of awkwardness.

As I grew up, Lizzy Bennet’s influence on me was quite literal: In my late 30s, I wrote my own modern retelling of Pride and Prejudice, set in Cincinnati. Writing Eligible offered me the delicious experience of spending years sitting at my desk thinking about Pride and Prejudice (and it counted as work!). It also prompted me to analyze why the novel resonates so deeply. There are multiple reasons—the humor, the romance, the wise observations about class and gender, the deft character development and propulsive dialogue. But I suspect that readers adore Pride and Prejudice because of this above all: Lizzy gets Darcy! And their successful and swoony coupling sends a message about love that isn’t easy to find elsewhere: It’s OK—in fact, it’s critical—to be true to yourself, because if the man of your dreams is really the man of your dreams, he’ll love you for your mind.

There is, apparently, a lot you can get away with when that happens. After you traipse through muddy fields to see your sick sister, the man will find your disheveled appearance charming (chapter 7). When you mock him for judging women, he will be enchanted (chapter 8).

When he proposes (finally! in chapter 34) and you tell him he’s “the last man in the world whom I could ever be prevailed on to marry,” he will respect you but also forgive you when you change your (magnificent) mind.

Do these “lessons” hold true in real life? I’d say...sort of. I think my husband loves me for my mind; whether he’s as charmed by my argumentative, headstrong nature depends on the situation. But I’m grateful that I’ve had Lizzy to look to as a role model of wit and authenticity.

I’ve never been perfect, but I’ve always been me.

P

C U R T I S S I T T E N F E L D I S T H E AU T H O R O F F I V E N OV E L S .

E L I G I B L E ( R A N D O M H O U S E ) I S A N E W YO R K T I M E S BEST SELLER.

J U N E 2017

156

SWEET MARY

H E N I G R A D UAT E D from college in 1983, my first job was with a big company in Chicago, selling trainloads of raw materials used to make glass. I was the first woman sales rep in my territory. I was breaking new ground, though I didn’t think about that—I just thought, “I want to make money and live on my own, like Mary Richards.”

I watched The Mary Tyler Moore Show as I entered my teens. My own mom was a homemaker for most of my childhood; she became a real estate agent when I was in high school. Back then there were very few single working women, and a TV show about one was radical. To see this alternative life was exciting. Mary throwing her hat in the air exemplified the freedom I wanted so much, and she showed me I could have it.

I had a great boss at that first job—my very own Lou Grant. He basically said, “It’s up to you. You can make it or not.” And in the back of my mind I had that line from the theme song: “You’re gonna make it after all.”

Mary showed me you could challenge a boss, push him, question what he said, and have a discussion as equals in a way I welcome now that I’m a boss myself. She held her own, but in a way that was warm and often funny. Her humanity showed through. It taught me that I didn’t have to just be tough to survive as a woman in business; I could also be myself.

W

J U N E 2017

Now I manage 1,500 people at Save the Children.

And the way Mary cared about her coworkers sticks with me. I’ve tried to create an environment where people are encouraged to speak their mind, and I bring humor into the workplace, knowing that part of Mary’s ability to connect with others was being quick to laugh (most importantly at herself). Some of the issues we deal with take an emotional toll. Humor builds resilience and a sense of teamwork so we can face challenges together.

Looking back, I realize I never saw Mary try to balance work and family. But at the age I met her, I only wanted to have a job and be independent, and she showed me the way. I have two adult sons and an adopted daughter who is almost 16, and her female role models are more varied, global, and accomplished than my teenage self could have ever dreamed. Mary Richards blazed a trail for me, and my children will blaze a trail for the next generation—hopefully with a dose of Mary’s determination, inclusiveness, and humor to guide them.

C A R O LY N M I L E S H A S WO R K E D F O R T H E I N T E R N AT I O N A L H U M A N I TA R I A N O R G A N I Z AT I O N S AV E T H E C H I L D R E N F O R 1 8 Y E A R S , T H E L A S T S I X A S P R E S I DE N T A N D C E O.

I STO C K / G E T T Y I M AG E S ( 2 )

B Y C A R O LY N M I L E S

157

MY SISTER CELIE

BY GABOUREY SIDIBE

WA S B O R N R IG H T A F T E R The Color Purple came out, so I feel like Celie and I are the same age. I was probably 6 when I first saw the movie. There were no real rules in my house about what we could watch. Then, in junior high, I read the book. There was nothing easy for Celie.

She was struggling left and right, handed from one horrible man to another. And the whole time I was reading about her, I was dealing with depression. I didn’t realize it as depression at the time, but every time I felt really, really low, I would pick up The Color Purple and read about Celie’s pain and how her struggle made her who she was, and it made me feel better about my life.

Because at least my daddy didn’t sell me off to this man, Mr., who wanted to marry my sister. At least I didn’t have to lie under Mr. I wasn’t raising some mean, ugly stepchildren like she was.

When I was 21 years old, I worked at a phone-sex call center as a “talker.” The pay was $7 an hour. It was degrading. I can’t tell you how many times I read The Color Purple between calls. I looked to Celie when I couldn’t afford therapy. People think I have a sunny disposition, but I’m not the most positive person. Celie did her best to stay positive. She believed God would care for her, even when she thought about dying. It’s awful, but I get it. I relate.

I used Celie’s story to remind myself that there was something to live for. I knew that one day I was going to crawl out from under my depression the way Celie got out from under Mr. And like Celie, I somehow got my fairy tale ending. I found success. I figured out how to not tether my happiness to some other person. My fairy tale ending is me and myself, living out loud as who I am, and I didn’t have that before. Every day I am older, I understand more about Celie. Insiders who read the book or see the play know that Celie’s a lesbian.

She’s not obviously so in the film. I don’t connect in

I

Stock your bookshelf. Find 14 more favorite reads recommended by well-known women at realsimple.com/inspiration.

terms of my sexuality—I’m straight—but she reminds me to be who I am. Celie reminds me about freedom.

The Color Purple is also a huge part of the world I live in with my friends. Every time we are about to leave each other, my friend Kia and I cross our hearts and pitty-pat with each other like Nettie and Celie. I think about Celie when I get my hair braided or if I’m working really hard. If it’s raining, I say, “It’s gon’ rain on yo’ head.” I can meet a black person for the first time and say anything from The Color Purple and they’ll get it immediately. It connects us.

I just bought a house. I’m putting up lots of bookcases—I want the crazy-librarian aesthetic. The first book I put on my shelf was The Color Purple. I feel like the characters in it are part of my family. Celie’s still with me. The Color Purple surrounds me constantly.

G A B O U R E Y S I D I B E S TA R S I N E M P I R E A N D I S T H E AU T H O R O F A N E W M E M O I R , T H I S I S J U S T M Y FA C E : T RY N O T T O S TA R E ( H O U G H T O N M I F F L I N H A R C O U R T ) .

J U N E 2017

B Y R O X A N E G AY

F T E R R E A D I N G M Y WO R K , people often tell me I am fearless and assume I have a lot of confidence. In truth, I’m just a writer. On the page, I am opinionated and more than willing to share my perspectives. I’ll even share my life and make myself vulnerable if the work demands it. I am firm in my convictions, and I take risks. But without words, I wouldn’t be that way.

Most of my childhood memories are of books, and the fondest of these involve Laura Ingalls Wilder and

A

J U N E 2017

R OX A N E G AY I S T H E AU T H O R O F B A D F E M I N I S T .

HER MEMOIR, HUNGER, WILL BE PUBLISHED JUNE 13

BY H A R P E R C O L L I N S .

G A L L E RY STO C K ; O P P O S I T E : I M AG E S O U R C E / A L A M Y

L AU RA, M Y L E A D E R

the eight original novels in the Little House on the Prairie series. As an adult with an abiding commitment to social justice, I recognize how problematic these books are, particularly in their unabashed racism toward indigenous people. But I also recognize how remarkable it was for books published in the 1930s and 1940s to focus on a young woman, and one who was smart, willful, and interesting.

I loved how adventurous Laura’s life seemed, even though her family traveled by wagon and a trip to town was something of an event. The winters were harsh.

Sugaring maple and playing with corncob dolls was considered fun. None of this seemed to faze Laura much.

She was a tomboy and had the prairie to explore and chores to do, and there was school and the kids she met there. She was independent and opinionated and a daddy’s girl. Pa loved to call Laura “half-pint,” which made me yearn, desperately, for a nickname.

As Laura got older, she had a clear sense of right and wrong. She wasn’t perfect, but she was willing to stand up to bullies. She was also willing, with time, to love and allow herself to be loved. The details about Laura’s courtship with Almanzo Wilder were so romantic to me because she made him earn her affection. She argued with Almanzo instead of capitulating.

Throughout my childhood I read and reread the Little House on the Prairie books, savoring every detail, every character from Pa to Mr. Edwards to Nellie Oleson. Mostly, though, I savored Laura. As a girl from the plains, the suburbs of Omaha, Nebraska, I very much wanted to be Laura. I wanted to believe my life could be interesting and full. And I was shy, so I wanted Laura’s pluck and moxie. Sometimes I would stare at myself in the mirror and do my best to channel Laura’s spirit before leaving the safety of home to face the world.

I wrote as much as I read. I wasn’t shy in the stories I wrote. I allowed myself to be wild, free. I never reined in my imagination. I wrote versions of myself that were far braver and more interesting than I could ever be. I wrote about girls I hoped Laura would like and respect and maybe even befriend. She was always there on my shoulder reminding me of what was possible with words.

She’s there even now.

159

HARRIET AND I

BY GRACE BONNEY

OR AS LONG AS I CAN REMEMBER, I’ve liked to ask questions. Most of my childhood report cards included some mention of “talking too much,” but I remember one elementary school teacher telling me that it was always OK to talk, as long as I was asking a question and learning more.

But as I got older, the natural order of kid-dom kicked in, and I realized that being the girl who asked so many questions would also make me the girl people made fun of. So I learned to quiet down and blend in. I started spending lunch breaks in the library, in desperate need of a place where it was cool—or at least OK—to be curious. While the library didn’t turn out to be the hotbed of new friends I had hoped for, it introduced me to brave and inspiring characters who profoundly changed the way I saw myself in the world. Among them, one loomed largest: Harriet, of Harriet the Spy. Harriet was a girl like me who loved to observe and ask questions. She was always asking someone something, connecting dots and finding ways to better understand the world around her. I will never forget the feeling of kinship I had reading Louise Fitzhugh’s description. Harriet was smart and a hard worker; she always had a notebook in her hand and wrote down the things she saw around her. She wanted to be a writer.

It felt like Fitzhugh was in my head and understood how I saw the world. And most important, Harriet’s world included people who cared about her and sup-

F

ported her inquisitiveness. They encouraged her to write, to speak up, and to always learn more.

I checked out our school’s copy of Harriet the Spy over and over again for weeks, just to carry it with me and feel a little braver and less alone. Harriet was an adventurer, and she made me feel like I could be, too.

And slowly I regained my confidence to speak up, ask questions, and not be afraid of my desire to know more.

It didn’t always work out the way it did for Harriet (I was never promoted beyond photo caption editor at my school’s newspaper), but it reminded me that who I was, and what mattered to me, were important. It was a powerful example of a young girl using her voice and her skills (which weren’t things only adults had) to make a difference. I carry that sense of bravery Harriet gave me into the work I do today. I try every day to encourage people (of all ages) to find their sense of adventure and to never stop being curious about the world around them.

GRACE BONNEY IS THE FOUNDER OF THE BLOG DE S I G N * S P O N G E A N D T H E AU T H O R O F I N T H E C O M PA N Y O F WO M E N: I N S P I R AT I O N A N D A DV I C E F R O M OV E R 1 0 0 M A K E R S , A R T I S T S , A N D E N T R E P R E N E U R S ( A R T I SA N B O O K S ) .

J U N E 2017

Your new favorite snack isn’t just delicious; it helps increase organic farmland.

Introducing new Kashi Chewy Nut Butter Bars made with creamy almond butter and chocolate FKXQNV %XW WKDW·V QRW DOO ³ WKH\·UH DOVR &HUWLÀ HG Transitional. That means they are made with ingredients from farms in the process of transitioning to organic — no easy task. In fact, less WKDQ RI IDUPODQG LQ WKH 8 6 LV FHUWLÀ HG RUJDQLF So let’s do something about it. Every time you enjoy D SURGXFW ZLWK WKH &HUWLÀ HG 7UDQVLWLRQDO VHDO you’re not only supporting farmers in transition, you’re also helping to increase that 1%.

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161

food

FOOD ST YL ING BY CHEL SE A Z IMMER; PROP ST YL ING BY CL A IRE SPOLLEN

C O O K W I T H C OZ I Get Real Simple’s easy weeknight-dinner recipes in Cozi, a free meal-planning and organizing app from Time Inc. (available on iTunes and Google Play).

JUNE

Go to realsimple.com/ dailyrecipe to have new favorite recipes delivered to your inbox every day.

PHOTOGRAPH BY GREG DUPREE

THIS TIME OF YEAR ushers in high season for gorgeous, ripe produce, from slender, snappable beans to crunchy lettuce. Get more green in your life by packing a healthy salad for lunch (we road tested our favorite containers on page 171). Or cook through this month’s easy, vegetable-centric recipes to find a new favorite. Enjoy it with a glass of lemonade (page 178), then head for the nearest hammock.

J U N E 2017

162

FOOD

Easy Dinner 1

Pasta with chicken sausage, corn, leeks, and mushrooms ACT I V E T I M E 2 0 M I N U T E S

TOTA L T I M E 2 0 M I N U T E S

Quick Cooking

SERVES 4

Family Friendly

8 oz. casarecce or other short pasta 1 tsp. kosher salt, plus more for pasta water 3 Tbsp. olive oil 1 12-oz. pkg. Italian chicken sausage, sliced crosswise into -in.-thick pieces 8 oz. cremini mushrooms, thinly sliced 2

cups fresh or frozen corn kernels (from about 4 ears) 2 medium leeks, chopped 2 Tbsp. unsalted butter

cup chopped fresh basil C O O K pasta in a large pot of boiling,

salted water until almost al dente, 8 to 10 minutes. Drain pasta, reserving cup of the pasta water.

M E A N W H I L E , heat oil in a large skillet over medium-high. Add sausage and mushrooms and cook, stirring often, until they begin to brown, about 5 minutes. Add corn, leeks, and salt and cook, stirring often, until corn is tender and leeks are soft, about 4 minutes.

A D D butter, lemon zest, and reserved pasta water and cook, tossing, until liquid reduces and coats pasta, about 3 minutes. Add lemon juice and toss to coat. Serve topped with basil.

P E R S E RV I N G : 648 CALORIES, 31G FAT (11G SAT.), 97MG CHOL., 5G FIBER, 27G PRO., 70G CARB., 963MG SOD., 11G SUGAR

JUNE 2017

RECIPES BY KAREN RANKIN

PHOTOGRAPHS BY GREG DUPREE

FOOD ST YL ING BY CHEL SE A Z IMMER; PROP ST YL ING BY CL A IRE SPOLLEN

1 tsp. lemon zest, plus 2 Tbsp. lemon juice (from 1 lemon)

164

FOOD

Easy Dinner 2

Pressed roast beef sandwiches with caramelized onions AC T I V E T I M E 1 5 M I N U T E S

TOTA L T I M E 3 0 M I N U T E S

Quick Cooking

SERVES 4

Family Friendly

3 Tbsp. olive oil, divided 1 large yellow onion, thinly sliced 4 oz. goat cheese, softened 6 Tbsp. mayonnaise 2 Tbsp. chopped chives tsp. black pepper 4 8-in. hoagie rolls, halved lengthwise 12 oz. thinly sliced deli roast beef 1 cup packed baby arugula 4 medium tomatoes, cut into 8 wedges each tsp. kosher salt H E AT 1 tablespoon of the oil in a

medium skillet over medium-high.

Add onion and cook, stirring occasionally, until it begins to soften, about 3 minutes. Reduce heat to medium-low and cook, stirring often, until onion is very soft and deep golden brown, 18 to 20 minutes.

M E A N W H I L E , stir together goat

cheese, mayonnaise, chives, and pepper in a small bowl. Divide goat cheese mixture among cut sides of hoagie rolls, spreading evenly to cover. Divide roast beef, arugula, and caramelized onions among bottom halves, then sandwich with tops, goat cheese side down. Brush outsides all over with 1 tablespoon of the oil.

H E AT a large nonstick skillet over

medium. Place sandwiches in skillet and place a second heavy skillet on top. Cook, flipping once, until bread is golden brown and crisp, about 3 minutes per side.

TO S S tomatoes, salt, and remaining

1 tablespoon oil in a medium bowl.

Serve with sandwiches.

P E R S E RV I N G : 560 CALORIES, 40G FAT (12G SAT.), 75MG CHOL., 3G FIBER, 25G PRO., 23G CARB., 796MG SOD., 5G SUGAR

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FOOD

167

Easy Dinner 3

Salmon cakes with caper mayonnaise ACT I V E T I M E 2 0 M I N U T E S

Healthy Pick

1

TOTA L T I M E 3 5 M I N U T E S

Family Friendly

SERVES 4

Make Ahead

cup capers, drained and chopped

P R E H E AT oven to 425ºF. Place salmon skin side down on a rimmed baking sheet, season with salt and pepper, and bake until opaque, 8 to 10 minutes; let cool 10 minutes. Break salmon into large pieces, discarding skin, and transfer to a medium bowl.

cup chopped parsley

S T I R together mayonnaise, capers,

lb. skin-on salmon tsp. kosher salt tsp. black pepper 1 cup mayonnaise

1 cup panko bread crumbs, divided 2 Tbsp. olive oil 1 medium romaine heart, chopped 1 cup halved grape tomatoes cup chopped English cucumber (from 1 medium cucumber)

“look, i’m a balancing breakfast ”

and parsley in a small bowl. Add cup of the panko and cup of the caper mayonnaise to salmon and stir gently to blend, keeping larger pieces of salmon intact. Shape mixture into 4 4-inch patties. Press remaining cup panko evenly on tops and bottoms of patties.

H E AT oil in a large nonstick skillet over medium-high. Cook patties until golden brown, 3 to 4 minutes per side.

Serve over romaine with tomatoes and cucumber, with remaining caper mayonnaise on the side.

DI N N ER MAD E E A SY Get all the ingredients for this recipe, measured and prepped, delivered to your door with our partner FreshRealm! Go to freshrealm.co/rs24 and enter code RS35JUN17R for $35 off your first order of $70 or more, now through June 30, 2017.

P E R S E RV I N G : 791 CALORIES, 60G FAT (9G SAT.), 126MG CHOL., 2G FIBER, 41G PRO., 20G CARB., 986MG SOD., 3G SUGAR

CRUNCHY WHEAT. FROSTED SWEET.

FEED YOUR

INNER KID

“ding goin’ up

Easy Dinner 4

Italian vegetable fagioli with toasted couscous ACT I V E T I M E 2 0 M I N U T E S

Healthy Pick

TOTA L T I M E 3 0 M I N U T E S

Vegetarian

Quick Cooking

3 Tbsp. olive oil, divided 1 large yellow squash, chopped 1 medium yellow onion, sliced 1

tsp. kosher salt 1 tsp. fennel seeds 3 cups vegetable broth 1 15-oz. can cannellini beans, drained and rinsed 1 14.5-oz. can diced fire-roasted tomatoes cup couscous

Make Ahead

SERVES 4

Freezable

Family Friendly

M E A N W H I L E , toast couscous in a medium skillet over medium-high until lightly browned, about 3 minutes.

Add cup boiling water; cover and remove from heat. Let stand 5 minutes and then fluff with a fork. Transfer to a bowl and wipe skillet clean.

H E AT remaining 1 tablespoon oil

in skillet over medium-high. Add couscous and cook, stirring often, until crisp, about 5 minutes.

TO P with toasted couscous and basil.

P E R S E RV I N G : 305 CALORIES, 10G FAT (1G SAT.), 0MG CHOL., 11G FIBER, 11G PRO., 42G CARB., 1,531MG SOD., 9G SUGAR

cup basil leaves H E AT 2 tablespoons of the oil in a large

CRUNCHY WHEAT. FROSTED SWEET.

FEED YOUR

INNER KID

saucepan over medium-high. Add squash, onion, salt, and fennel seeds and cook, stirring often, until onion is tender, about 5 minutes. Add broth, beans, and tomatoes and bring to a boil. Reduce to a simmer and cook, stirring occasionally, until squash is tender, 8 to 10 minutes.

JUNE 2017

DI N N ER MAD E E A SY Get all the ingredients for this recipe, measured and prepped, delivered to your door with our partner FreshRealm! Go to freshrealm.co/rs24 and enter code RS35JUN17R for $35 off your first order of $70 or more, now through June 30, 2017.

FOOD

169

Easy Dinner 5

Spanish tortilla with harissa sauce ACT I V E T I M E 2 5 M I N U T E S

Gluten-Free

TOTA L T I M E 3 0 M I N U T E S

Vegetarian

6 Tbsp. olive oil, divided 1

lb. red potatoes, thinly sliced (about 4 cups) 2 large shallots, thinly sliced 2 tsp. kosher salt, divided

1

tsp. black pepper, divided 8 large eggs, beaten 5 oz. red leaf lettuce 4 tsp. sherry vinegar, divided cup harissa 1 tsp. sour cream 1 small clove garlic, grated

P R E H E AT broiler to high with rack

8 inches from heat.

H E AT 3 tablespoons of the oil in a

Quick Cooking

“splash down ”

SERVES 4

Family Friendly

R E D U C E heat to medium-low and

add 2 tablespoons of the oil to the skillet. Stir eggs into potato mixture and pour into skillet, pressing into an even layer. Cook, without stirring, until sides and bottom are set and edges begin to pull away from skillet, 8 to 10 minutes.

T R A N S F E R to oven and broil until

top is set and golden brown, about 3 minutes. Cover skillet with a large plate and carefully invert to release tortilla.

TO S S lettuce with 3 teaspoons

of the vinegar and remaining 1 teaspoon salt, tablespoon oil, and teaspoon pepper.

C O M B I N E harissa, sour cream,

garlic, and remaining 1 teaspoon vinegar in a small bowl. Cut tortilla into wedges and serve with harissa sauce and salad.

medium cast-iron skillet over mediumhigh. Add potatoes, shallots, 1 teaspoons of the salt, and 1 teaspoons of the pepper; cook, stirring often, until potatoes are tender but not browned, 12 to 15 minutes.

Transfer to a medium bowl.

P E R S E RV I N G : 463 CALORIES, 30G FAT (6G SAT.), 373MG CHOL., 4G FIBER, 17G PRO., 31G CARB., 1,257MG SOD., 6G SUGAR

CRUNCHY WHEAT. FROSTED SWEET.

FEED YOUR

INNER KID

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FOOD

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171

172

FOOD

2 B E ST F O R A S M O R G A S B O R D

3 B E ST F O R C O M PACT STO RAG E

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The plastic-free silicone lids form a leakproof seal.

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7 B E ST F O R K I D S

Herschel Supply Co. Pop Quiz Lunch Box

Hydro Flask 12 oz. Food Flask

Bentgo Kids Lunch Box

We love this compact, lightweight stainless-steel pick because it kept our soup steaming hot for six hours―longer than any other thermos we tested. And thanks to double walls, the outside never gets hot. A simply designed lid screws on tightly, so the jar won’t spill in your bag.

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J U N E 2017

F O O D S T Y L I N G B Y H E AT H G O L D M A N ; P R O P S T Y L I N G B Y A N G E L A C A M P O S

B R E A K FA ST BREAK

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FOOD

175

Make It Yourself A DEL ICIOUS ES SENT I AL T H AT ’ S B E T T E R H O M E M A D E T H A N S T O R E - B O U G H T. W E ’ L L P R O V E I T. T H I S M O N T H : Barbecue Sauce

S W E E T, TA N G Y barbecue sauce can be a (non-ketchup!) shortcut to making meals family friendly. Whether brushed onto grilled chicken, folded into meatloaf, or set on the side for dipping, it ofers big flavor in a snap.

But too often the bottled stuf is overwhelm-

WRI T TEN BY DAWN PERRY

PHOTOGRAPH BY GREG DUPREE

ingly sweet or distractingly smoky. Striking a balance between the two flavors is key.

That’s why we make it ourselves, and you can, too. Want more bite? Amp up the vinegar. Less heat? Omit the cayenne. It’s our recipe but your rules.

J U N E 2017

176

FOOD

MAKE IT YOURSELF

ACT I V E T I M E 1 5 M I N U T E S TOTA L T I M E 1 5 M I N U T E S MAKES 2 CUPS

2 Tbsp. vegetable oil 1 medium yellow onion, finely chopped 2 cloves garlic, finely chopped 1 cup ketchup cup lightly packed dark brown sugar 3 Tbsp. apple cider vinegar 1 Tbsp. Dijon mustard 1 Tbsp. molasses 2 tsp. Worcestershire sauce 1 tsp. onion powder –

tsp. cayenne, optional

oil in a medium saucepan over mediumhigh. Add onion and garlic and cook, stirring often, until soft but not brown, about 5 minutes.

Add ketchup, sugar, vinegar, mustard, molasses, Worcestershire, onion powder, and cayenne (if using) and stir to combine. Bring to a simmer and cook, stirring often, until slightly thickened, 5 to 7 minutes. Store in an airtight container in the refrigerator for up to 3 weeks.

H E AT

Brush onto chicken, shrimp, or pork chops during the last few minutes of grilling. Or use as a dipping sauce for potato wedges or french fries or as a topping for bacon burgers.

TO U S E :

J U N E 2017

178

FOOD

Big Batch

Lemonade concentrate TOTA L T I M E 1 5 M I N U T E S

M A K E S 5 C U P S SY R U P ( 1 6 S E RV I N G S )

F O O D ST Y L I N G BY C H EL S E A Z I M M ER ; P R O P ST Y L I N G BY C L A I RE S P O L L EN

ACT I V E T I M E 1 5 M I N U T E S

J U N E 2017

R E C I P E B Y H E AT H G O L D M A N

PHOTOGRAPH BY GREG DUPREE

2 cups sugar 2

cups fresh lemon juice (from about 15 medium lemons)

B R I N G sugar and 1 cups water to a boil and cook, stirring occasionally, until sugar is dissolved, about 2 minutes. Remove from heat and let cool.

C O M B I N E sugar syrup and lemon juice in an airtight container.

in the refrigerator for up to 3 weeks or in the freezer for up to 5 months.

STO R E

TO S E RV E , mix 1 part syrup with 1 part water.

Pour over ice.

P E R S E RV I N G : 106 CALORIES, 0G FAT (0G SAT.), 0MG CHOL., 0G FIBER, 0G PRO., 28G CARB., 1MG SOD., 26G SUGAR

TIP For easy freezing, divide the syrup and freeze in 4 smaller containers.

Dilute your concentrate with booze instead of water. Go to realsimple .com/boozylemonade for fun recipes.

180

The Pinterest Guide to a Perfect Morning

1. Wake up under the Broken Herringbone pattern quilt you hand-sewed (BROKEN

2. Get started on one of nine BREAKFAST

HERRINGBONE PATTERN QUILT PDF!) and

Almond butter! Eggs!

Pecans! Out of quinoa? Substitute buckwheat! No buckwheat? Toss in some millet! No millet?

Get it together―who among us doesn’t have millet? Hahaha-

cheerfully hop out of bed and into the ankle boot slippers you made out of dryer lint (SIMPLE FELTED DRYER-LINT SLIPPER TUTORIAL) .

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3. At this point, someone may need something from you emotionally.

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6. Walk past the liveedge red maple dining table (VIDEO: STAINING UNFINISHED FURNITURE, PART 39)

and your gallery wall of professionally matted photocopies of your children’s hands.

7. Crying is coming from your 11-yearold daughter, who is sitting in the wing chair you upholstered with your great-grandmother’s floral bathrobe (DIY NO-SEW WINGBACK CHAIR REUPHOLSTER) .

Why is she crying?

Would she like a periodic table of the elements temporary tattoo? Potassium?

Carbon??

8. Daughter looks up at you teary-eyed, still shaking. Please, please, how can you help? Throw your arms around her without even asking what’s wrong (THROWING YOUR ARMS AROUND HER EVEN THOUGH YOU’RE NOT SURE WHY SHE’S SAD TUTORIAL) . Her eyes

are swollen and pink.

Seeing her this way is breaking your heart because you can’t do anything

J U N E 2017

(WHO MADE YOU FEEL LIKE THIS? TELL ME AND I WILL CRUSH THEM PDF) .

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bubbly toddler whose problems were things like “getting splinters” (VIDEO: HOW TO POWER-WASH A DECK) .

10. Through her sobs, you glean that the problem has something to do with girls at school (MANAGING ANGER: 3 EASY STEPS TO NOT GIVING THOSE GIRLS A PIECE OF YOUR MIND) . But there is

nothing you can do, really. It is not something you can fix.

11. Shout to the other children to go wait for the bus.

12. Walk quickly upstairs and return, wrapping your daughter in the Broken Herringbone pattern quilt. You hold her tightly and begin to cry as well, ruining the effect of SIMPLE EYELINER TUTORIAL .

You smell her clean hair on your shoulder (NO-FRILLS APPLE CIDER VINEGAR HAIR RINSE) . Her breathing

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The two of you have so many wonderful things to learn.

W R I T T E N B Y B Y R A Q U E L D ’A P I C E

B L A I B AU L E S / STO C K SY

The Struggle Is Real

haha, that was a great joke, the “no millet” thing. Obviously, you will occasionally run out of millet because your kids literally can’t stop eating it, and in that case you can (obviously) substitute eggshells or crumbled pieces of barnwood. If one of them isn’t into the breakfast bowls, you can whip up pancake muffins with raspberry syrup, and if you can’t do that, what are you doing raising children?

by invitation :: tipsntrends, inc :: 323-525-1700

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184

Rituals

Every June, I look forward to visiting a berry farm in my town. I started the tradition of making strawberry shortcake for dinner (yes, dinner!) with the first few baskets when my kids were in elementary school. They’d come home not knowing the red gems were in season yet and would be so surprised when I announced what we’d be having.

These little breaking-the-rules sorts of ideas make our family who we are.

—Jodi Nylin, Puyallup, Washington

JUNE 2017

P H OTO G R A P H BY P E T E R B AG I / G A L L ERY STO C K

How My Family Welcomes Summer

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