Parents - April 2021

E A S T E R I D E A S F O R A LL YO U R P E E P S

D E E P B R E AT H S ! F R E S H WAYS T O C O P E W I T H B I G F E E LI N G S

G R E E N C LE A N E R S T H AT GET THE JOB DONE

S PE C IAL PE T S ISSUE

w i t h h u s b a n d J o s h Ke l l ey, kids Joshua, Adalaide, and Naleigh, and rescue pup Sarge

E NJ OY TH E LI T TLE M O M E NT S

APRIL 2021 PARENTS.COM

R AI S I N G T H E F UTU R E

CONTENTS

APRIL. I N E V E RY I S S U E 6 Editor’s Note

73

9 Playbook 108 Giggles

With new spins on old-school crafts and games, Easter will be hoppin’.

15 / Special-Ed Strategies

20 / Infection Fighters 101 Everything you ever wanted to know about antibiotics and kids

That Work for All Kids Game-changing approaches to daily behavior issues

26 / Health News Keep kids’ allergies and back problems at bay.

KIDS

30 / 10 Highly Subjective Reasons to Get a Pet One mom (of both kids and cats) makes the entertaining and convincing case for adding a furry sibling to the family.

38 / Take the Cake!

Banana cream cake made with simple ingredients 42 / The Book Nook The latest book in Alyssa Milano’s series has an Earth Day hook.

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R AI S I N G T H E F UTU R E

CONTENTS

APRIL .

57

46 / Starring ... Vegetables!

With their faves like pasta and cheese in supporting roles, kids will be enticed to enter veggie territory.

54 / Animal House!

Monroe, 5, shines a spotlight on her fabulously f luffy cat, Abe.

YO U

57 / Natural Beauty Stars Four moms with a green bent share their top products across makeup, skin care, and hair care.

64 / Katherine Heigl Finds Her Happy Place The Grey’s Anatomy alum, her musician husband, their three kids, and multiple rescue pets are a tight-knit crew thriving far from Hollywood.

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70 / Welcome to My World A new column on how real-life moms juggle work and parenting

LIFE

73 / Let’s Hatch Some Fun Up in Here!

Cool and creative egg-dye ideas, basket add-ins, and twists on the hunt to make the Easter magic happen 80 / Green Cleaners That Shine For our annual Best Green Cleaners awards, parents tested laundry detergents, sanitizing sprays, and more.

88 / Best-in-Show Decorating Tips Home design with pets in mind, from stylish litter boxes to fur-camouflaging throw pillows

80

94 / Brunch on the Bright Side Spring-inspired waff les, carrot cake, and quiche

A G E S + S TA G E S

105 / 0–12 Months Start reading early and your baby will reap the benefits later.

105 / 1–2 Years Learn the skills to help get your toddler to sit still.

106 / 3–4 Years Handle rude or demanding behavior.

106 / 5–6 Years Get your kid to help around the house.

107 / 7+ Years Learn effective ways to motivate your child in any given situation.

On the Cover Katherine Heigl and Josh Kelley with their children, Joshua, 4 years, Adalaide, 8 years, and Naleigh, 12 years, and their rescue dog Sarge.

Photograph by Mark Williams + Sara Hirakawa. Katherine’s wardrobe styling by Nola Singer. Josh’s and children’s wardrobe styling by Jennifer Smith. Makeup by Meredith Baraf using Armani Beauty. Hair

by Dominick Pucciarello using Kevin Murphy. On Joshua: Sweater and pants, Gap. Shoes, Vans. On Adalaide: Jacket, Gap. Sweater, Crewcuts.

On Josh: Sweater, John Varvatos.

Pants, Billy Reid. On Katherine: Dress, LoveShackFancy. Sweater, Missoni.

Earrings, Jenny Bird. On Naleigh: Jacket, Gap. Pants, Zara. Lettering by McCandliss and Campbell.

TELL US ABOUT YOUR PET!

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Contributing Editors ANNA HELM BAXTER, DAPHNE de MARNEFFE, Ph.D., CATHERINE HONG, JOY HOWARD, TAMEKIA REECE, ERIN ZAMMETT RUDDY, VIRGINIA SOLE-SMITH D I G I TA L

Digital Content Director JULIA DENNISON Deputy Editor MELISSA BYKOFSKY Senior SEO Editor LIZ LASHWAY Features Editor ANNA HALKIDIS Social Media Editor GILLIAN NIGRO Associate Editor LIBBY RYAN SEO Writer NICOLE HARRIS Associate Producer FRANCESCA SPATOLA ADVISORY B OARD PEDIATRICS Ari Brown, M.D., Antwon Chavis, M.D., David L. Hill, M.D., Yvonne Maldonado, M.D., Terri McFadden, M.D., Kimberly Montez, M.D., M.P.H., Natalie D. Muth, M.D., M.P.H., R.D.N., Cara Natterson, M.D., Irwin Redlener, M.D., Michael Rich, M.D., M.P.H., Darshak Sanghavi, M.D., Jennifer Shu, M.D. NUTRITION Jill Castle, R.D.N., Maya Feller, R.D., Sally Kuzemchak, R.D., Dalina Soto, R.D. MENTAL HEALTH AND BEHAVIOR Lisa Damour, Ph.D., Wayne Fleisig, Ph.D., Becky Kennedy, Ph.D., Eileen Kennedy-Moore, Ph.D., Harold S. Koplewicz, M.D., Laura S. Olivos, Psy.D., Silvia Pereira-Smith, M.D., Adiaha Spinks-Franklin, M.D., Timothy L. Verduin, Ph.D. ENVIRONMENTAL HEALTH Aaron Bernstein, M.D., M.P.H., Philip Landrigan, M.D. DENTISTRY Lezli Levene Harvell, D.M.D., Maria Velasco, D.M.D. WOMEN’S HEALTH Tamika Auguste, M.D., Yamel Belen, R.N., C.L.C., Marjorie Greenfield, M.D., Marta Perez, M.D., Laura Riley, M.D., Alexandra Sacks, M.D. EDUCATION AND LITERACY Patricia Edwards, Ph.D., Jennifer Serravallo, Colby Sharp ALLERGY Michael Pistiner, M.D., Hemant Sharma, M.D. EMERGENCY MEDICINE AND SAFETY Khama Ennis, M.D., M.P.H., Mark Anthony Griffiths, M.D., Wendy L. Hunter, M.D.

“My fur baby, SLEEP Maida Chen, M.D., Jodi Mindell, Ph.D., Judith Owens, M.D. a husky named Olive, is DERMATOLOGY Anna Bruckner, M.D., Jody Alpert Levine, M.D., super-sassy and Kim Nichols, M.D. does these SOCIAL JUSTICE Traci Baxley, Ph.D., Nayeli Y. Chavez-Dueñas, Ph.D., hilarious little Ibram X. Kendi, Ph.D., Julie Lythcott-Haims pig snorts when excited.”

“Lucky has brought so much joy to my boys during quarantine. They bought him a toy skateboard in hopes of teaching him to ride.”

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COURTESY OF STAFF.

JULIA EDELSTEIN Editor-in-Chief

EDITOR’S NOTE

The Tricky Business of Advice I WA S S E V E N

Wisdom Squad I asked three of our new advisors to share the best parenting advice they’ve ever received.

“Our kids raise us just as much as we raise them. We’re all learning through this experience of parenting.”

—Khama Ennis, M.D., M.P.H., emergency medicine advisor

humor, compassion, and, most important, insights into how to raise kind, healthy kids.

Our highest calling as editors and parents ourselves is to deliver on this promise—and we wouldn’t dare do it alone.

For decades, Parents has depended on the wisdom of an esteemed advisory board (see page 4) populated by, no exaggeration, some of the greatest minds on child development, parenting, health, and ethics in our nation. Over the past year, as we came to grips with a changed world, we realized that our parenting needs had transformed a bit too.

To reflect the most current thinking and perspectives on childhood and parenthood, last month we added a socialjustice category, along with 30 new advisors in categories like pediatrics, sleep, and mental health and behavior.

I hope you’ll take a moment

to peruse these names, as each individual brings expertise that will be instrumental in shaping our content in the months ahead.

Parenting today is arguably more challenging than it’s ever been, but with this outstanding advisory board in our corner, I know Parents is equipped to meet the moment.

“When I was on leave with my first newborn, my mentor told me that although my daughter needed me then for obvious reasons, I should prepare for her to need me more as she got older.

I’ve found this to be true.”

—Jennifer Serravallo, education and literacy advisor

“My mom still reminds me to pick my battles. It’s okay to sometimes give in to your child, especially if it’s more about ego than parenting.

Give yourself grace too.”

Visit Me on Instagram Simply hover your phone’s camera over the smart code to catch my feed.

—Kimberly Montez, M.D., M.P.H., pediatrics advisor

We’re here to help. Email JuliaE@parents.com to tell me about the topics you’d like to see in future issues of Parents.

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JULIA AND SONS: ZOE ADLERSBERG. WARDROBE STYLING BY CONNIE BERG. MAKEUP BY MAKE UP FOR EVER. ADVISORS: COURTESY OF THE SUBJECTS.

months pregnant the first time I was on the receiving end of unsolicited parenting advice. A smiling woman in my apartment building congratulated me on my bump—then reminded me that a mother belongs in the home and said she hoped I’d be quitting my job.

(Thanks, neighbor!)

Right away I realized that when it comes to parenting, everyone has an opinion, and if you want to take in the golden tidbits that will help you on your way, you’ll also have to listen to a lot of “wisdom” that drives you bonkers.

Seven years and many brilliant (and questionable) tips later, I’ve developed a thicker skin than the armor on my 4-year-old’s Iron Man action figure. In a typical day, I consume dozens (sometimes hundreds) of parenting tips. Granted, it’s my job to curate advice, but I think this stat would hold true even if I didn’t work at Parents. Scrolling through my social media feeds, where I follow mom and dad influencers and am in dozens of parenting groups, feels a little like creating one giant momming “should-do” list.

Our generation has been blessed with an infinite supply of suggestions, yet advice that’s good—and by that, I mean nuanced, heartfelt, sensitive, smart, and timely—can be hard to find and to remember.

That is why we at Parents are grateful and humbled that you come to us for information, inspiration,

© 2020 The Caldrea Company. All Rights Reserved.

PLAYBOOK Your guide to making the days easier and the journey sweeter

PROP STYLING BY KATJA GREEFF. FOOD STYLING BY HADAS SMIRNOFF.

LET THERE BE DELIGHT!

Ear’s a cute way to enjoy the star of the Easter basket. (Wait, what did you say?)

Milk Does a Bunny Good Your kid is gonna bite the ears off first anyway—so after they chomp, fill the body of a hollow chocolate bunny with milk, add a straw, and then present them with the most adorbs chocolate milk ever, an irresistible hack from the blog All for the Memories.

photograph by K AT E M AT H I S

(The bunny shown here is from Jacques Torres, $9.50; mrchocolate.com.) Pro tip: If you peel back just the top of the foil wrapper or simply wrap the bottom half in cellophane, those kid hands won’t get gooey. It’s a legend—wait for it—dairy way to top off the holiday.

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P L AY B O O K

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/ TA K E 5 /

N OT E TO S E L F

APPROVED

2021

Dinos go full color when wet.

5

6

/ THE ESSENTIALS /

SLAY A R AINY DAY Whether the skies are cloudy or bright, we all need some fresh air. These picks for you and your kids make stormy weather no big deal.

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/ TA N T R U M O F T H E M O N T H /

It was the best of times, it was the accidentally-pushedthe-elevator-buttonbefore-offering-tolet-your-toddler-pushit of times. @HenpeckedHal

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The Joules Molly Welly boots come in 23 patterns bursting with personality (from bees and blossoms to ducks and dachshunds), so there’s bound to be one that playfully suits yours. $80; zappos.com 2

You won’t sweat the phone getting soaked with the waterproof, drop-proof LifeProof FRĒ phone case.

It’s worth the investment anyway if your toddler

tends to manhandle your device. $90; lifeproof.com

under that rainbow. $50; store.moma.org

3

5

The ReNew Anorak’s fabric comes from recycled plastic bottles. In a downpour, it’s a waterbeading, hooded lifesaver in a stylishly oversize fit. $88; everlane.com

Parents swear by Kids’ Handle It Rain Boots, made of one piece of lightweight, watertight material that’s easy for “I do it” little ones to pull on. $35; crocs.com

4 The super-sturdy Color Wheel Umbrella provides a wide 45 inches of coverage—and it’s hard not to feel a little sunnier

6 For your mini: The Color Changing Raincoat is better when wetter, with characters that become more vibrant in the rain. $55; hollyandbeau.com

WOMAN: CATHERINE DELAHAYE/GETTY. PHONE CASE, UMBRELLA, AND CHILDREN’S RAIN JACKET: JEFFREY WESTBROOK. BOOTS AND ANORAK: COURTESY OF THE BRANDS.

Toddler threw themself on the floor and is wailing at full volume? Tween stormed up the stairs and slammed the door?

When you’re face-to-face with a tough parenting situation, you may not have a life coach in the wings. But it turns out you have someone closer, and cheaper!

You. It’s called distanced selftalk, says dad and psychologist Ethan Kross, Ph.D. “I talk to myself, in my head, like I’m walking someone else through a problem. I say, ‘Calm down, Ethan. You can manage this’ or ‘Ethan, chill out. This will blow over,’ ” says the author of Chatter: The Voice in Our Head, Why It Matters, and How to Harness It. Separating yourself from the issue can help you relate to it as if it’s another person’s, which makes it easier to give yourself advice—and actually take it.

TRY TELLING OUR FARMERS IT ISN’T REAL MILK. All the goodness of real milk, just without the lactose.

©McNeil Nutritionals, LLC 2021

100% real milk, no lactose.

P L AY B O O K

THE SHORT LIST

Alyson Hannigan The comedic actor from How I Met Your Mother — and before that, Buffy the Vampire Slayer— has spent her pandemic days overseeing schooling and crafting with daughters Satyana, 11, and Keeva, 8. In fictional family life, she stars alongside a squirrel (of the CGI variety) in the Disney+ film Flora & Ulysses, based on the Newbery Medal–winning book, playing mom to the squirrel’s pal, Flora.

Recent parenting win I think I’ve really made this incredibly hard time as fun and positive for my kids as I could. We act silly and we’ve gotten creative with remote learning, and I remind them it that will be something they can tell their grandkids they lived through.

Recent parenting fail I tend to interrupt them during school.

Yesterday, I was trying to adjust a curtain that I’d hung up to block the sunlight from my daughter’s desk, and the entire thing fell down! Rod and all. Oops.

My parenting superpower I do holidays and birthdays really well. I basically do what I would have loved as a kid!

My parenting kryptonite I’m not great with planning playdates (although I’ve gotten out of that one for the last year!).

I forget that the kids probably want to go to someone else’s house.

themes! For example, for the first day of school I made everything look like school supplies.

Sandwiches were books, bell peppers were rulers, a cheese stick was a pencil, stuff like that.

Meal I tried that the family rejected They are pretty great about trying things, but my younger daughter was not into my egg frittata. :(

Hannigan and her kids are so into crafting that they’ve set aside a whole room to glue, scissor, and create away.

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Meal I make that my kids love I make fun food, usually for lunchtime. I love

GPS isn’t just for helping you find your way. The Fetch pet ID tag secures onto your pup’s collar and connects to an app that stores your contact info. When someone finds your lost pet, the directions on the back of the tag instruct them to retrieve the details. You’ll be instantly notified of the GPS location—a step up from a microchip, which requires someone to take your dog to a vet to locate you. $25; lifekey.co

Best trait my kids got from me Seeing the bright side of things Unfortunate trait my kids got from me Starting projects and not finishing them

Activity I love to do with my kids We love any and all types of crafting! It’s wonderful to see how creative and imaginative they are.

If you’re hosting a virtual seder with family and friends this Passover (March 27 to April 4), you can still hide the afikomen and have it be a fun hunt.

Think of a hiding spot, write it down to ensure no cheating, and let people guess where the matzo is, 20 questions– style, whether it’s under the couch cushions or somewhere more fantastical (say, Cinderella Castle at Walt Disney World).

Activity I hate to do with my kids I also hate to craft with my kids because the cleanup is big!

Best time of day Anytime my kids want to snuggle!

Worst time of day Right before dinner, everyone gets hangry.

This month’s lineup of what’s new, novel, and nice to know

Scroll Her Feed Simply hover your phone’s camera over the smart code to see Hannigan on Instagram.

Your Euro vacation may be on hold, but you can take a few culinary trips in your kitchen with Milk Street: Tuesday Nights Mediterranean, by acclaimed cookbook author Christopher Kimball. Expose your kid to tastes from places such as Italy, France, Greece, Israel, and Morocco and get yourself out of a rut with dinners (mercifully) focused on pantry staples that you can whip up fast. $35; out April 6

HANNIGAN: E! ENTERTAINMENT/CONTRIBUTOR/GETTY. FETCH: COURTESY OF THE BRAND. MATZO: RUSLANDASHINSKY/GETTY. MILK STREET: COURTESY OF THE PUBLISHER.

/ THE HIGHS AND LOWS /

Surprise & excite your cat with over 100 varieties at Friskies.com

Trademarks owned by Société des Produits Nestlé S.A., Vevey, Switzerland.

“It’s Flavor Fill’d & Flavor Grill’d!”

If you can believe this, baby, your skin is 5x thinner than your parents’.

But don’t worry, we’ll help keep your skin clean and healthy with Huggies Special Delivery™ diapers and wipes made with plant-based materials.* *Diapers 20%+ by weight.

The clean + healthy duo.

KIDS.

H E L P T H E M T H R I V E I N E V E R Y WA Y P S S T: H AV E YO U R KI D U S E A S E C R E T C O D E

WHEN THEY’RE FEELING FR A ZZLED.

Special-Ed Strategies That Work for All Kids Whether your child struggles with outbursts, focus, or fidgeting, educators say these researchbacked classroom techniques can make a real difference, right in your own home.

The tricks teachers rely on for children with learning disabilities can help most kids.

by C AT H E R I N E RYA N G R E G O RY

photograph by MEL ANIE AC EVEDO

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K I D SÑB e h a v i o r

F O R W H AT S E E M E D

like ages, my then 3-year-old daughter, Edie, freaked out whenever we tried to wash her hair. She screamed. She cried. Her pixie-like frame shook with panic. “Oh, you know, it’s just bathtime,” I imagined myself explaining to the neighbors, who could surely hear the nightly screechfest.

I tried everything to get her hair clean without the hysterics, from letting her pick out Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles shampoo to folding my 5-foot-10 self into the tub with her. But it was my husband, a special-education teacher, who was finally able to help our typically developing daughter get over her phobia.

He sat down next to the bathtub one night and asked Edie why she was afraid.

He listened and then asked what would help her feel better. Together, the two of them came up with a plan: They’d watch an episode of Daniel Tiger’s Neighborhood about getting clean, and then try it out themselves. I peeked into the bathroom.

“I’m CPS-ing,” Eric whispered to me.

That acronym wasn’t an attempt to hide something from our kids (“Where’d we put the d-o-n-u-t-s?”). Rather, Collaborative Problem Solving (CPS) is an approach he uses to help students in his class work through their own obstacles.

Special education, broadly defined, means providing the tools, environment, support, and instruction that kids with diagnosed disabilities need in order to learn. However, CPS isn’t the only special-ed approach that benefits children of all abilities. “Applying some basic principles of learning can create a happier and more productive environment for everybody in the family,” says William Heward, Ed.D., professor emeritus at the College of Education and Human Ecology of Ohio State University and author of Exceptional Children: An Introduction to Special Education.

If you’re regularly challenged by your kid’s garden-variety issues like having meltdowns, getting impatient, or kicking the back of your seat, consider nine beyond-the-classroom skills.

Cue what’s on deck.

Special-education teachers rely heavily on routines and visual cues of what’s coming up next so that students won’t be

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BY G I V I N G

A P L AY - B Y - P L AY O F W H AT ’ S C O M I N G

U P N E X T, Y O U C A N B U I L D PAT I E N C E .

surprised and then act out. You can adapt this tactic outside the classroom, says Roberta Dunn, executive director of the disabilities advocacy group FACT Oregon. For example, if your kid constantly asks, “Are we there yet?” even if you’re just driving across town, Dunn suggests breaking up the trip the same way teachers break up the day. You might say, “First we’ll pass the used-car lot with the balloons,” and your kid will peer out the window. Once you pass the dealership, tell them the next landmark, and so on until you arrive. Boom—you’ve turned a chore into a super-fun scavenger

hunt. “Breaking down a day, a schedule, or even a car ride into units establishes targets where children can direct their energy,” Dunn says.

Use DIY tricks to fight fidgeting.

Educational supports are all the rage (remember fidget spinners?), in part because research shows they help some students sharpen their focus and improve memory. But impulse-buy gadgets aren’t the only supports that work. You can raid your closet or even your utensil drawer to MacGyver a support—aka anything that

helps your child’s attention or burns up energy, Dunn says. For example, if your child constantly stands up on their chair during meals, they’re probably holding in extra oomph that needs to go somewhere.

You can wrap a bungee cord or a physicaltherapy band between the legs of their chair that they can kick all they want.

ANNA WOLF.

Avoid using the word but.

How many times have you had this argument, or one like it: Your child is building with LEGO bricks and it’s time for bed. You point out that the timer went off and they need to leave their project until tomorrow. They protest.

You say you understand, but it’s bedtime, end of story. You might feel like you’re being empathetic—after all, you listened to and repeated back their objections—but saying but actually undermines the common ground you’re trying to build.

“The word but belittles your child’s voice because it signals their opinion isn’t as important as yours,” says Meagan McCarthy, a special-education teacher in Tucson. Instead, try a CPS technique called the Plan B Conversation, which McCarthy uses in her classroom. When you and your child want different things, paraphrase their concern. Say, “I hear that finishing your LEGO castle is really important to you.” Then state what’s important to you. Try, “My concern is that you get enough rest so you’re ready to learn at school.” Then ask them to suggest a Plan B—like finishing one tower now and the rest tomorrow before breakfast.

McCarthy says, “The idea is to work together to find a solution that meets both of your needs, not to enforce Plan A, which is all about the adult’s will.” If you and your child come to an impasse—say, they refuse to turn off the TV to get ready for bed—try to find out why they feel so strongly. (Maybe it’s their favorite show or they didn’t get any other screen time that day.) Try to use that intel to come up with a compromise (make sure they get to watch tomorrow). If you truly can’t make a deal, let the issue go (they can experience the natural consequence of being tired the next day), and come back to it when you are in a better headspace.

A key exception: Matters of safety are always nonnegotiable.

Tune in to emotions.

Some special-education classrooms are called life-skills programs because they help children with disabilities learn fundamental skills—like listening instead of interrupting, tying their shoes, or washing their hands after using the bathroom—in order to thrive in the wider world. Emotional literacy is a huge component of these lessons.

“Helping kids be aware of what they’re feeling offers them an opportunity to own what is going on in their body,”

Those out-of-control feelings can be scary for children, so it’s up to you to teach them to de-escalate, McCarthy says. One of her favorite tools to use when this happens is the push/pull technique. Face your child, clasp both of their hands in yours, and let them push into your palms while they breathe out. Then have them pull on your hands, leaning back, as they breathe in. They can also do this on their own: Encourage them to push as hard as they can on a closed door, then hold on to the doorknob and pull back with the door closed. “This gets their aggression out in a safe way, and they can do it anywhere,” McCarthy says.

Give purposeful praise.

I F YO U A N D YO U R CHILD COME TO A N I M PAS S E— SAY, TH E Y

REFUSE TO TURN OFF THE TV TO GET

R E A DY F O R B E D —T RY T O FIND OUT WHY THEY

F E E L S O S T R O N G LY.

Dunn says. You can make abstract concepts—such as embarrassment, anxiety, or excitement—more concrete by doing a simple exercise that Dunn recommends. Ask your child to check in with their body by placing a hand over their heart. Is it beating fast or slow?

What’s their breathing like? Is there tension in their shoulders or belly? Then you can help them match the name for a feeling with how their body is reacting.

That’s the first step in learning to manage their emotions, Dunn says.

Find a safe outlet for big feelings.

Sometimes, in spite of their best efforts, your kid will spiral into a tantrum.

We’ve all heard about the moratorium on telling your child “Good job”: The antipraise camp asserts that too much positive feedback can make kids less independent and even turn them into “praise junkies.” However, strategically recognizing the behavior you want your children to repeat—like sharing with a sibling or putting away their toys—is precisely what encourages them to keep at it, says Dr. Heward. Positive Behavior Interventions and Supports is a specialeducation system that recommends using a ratio of five compliments to one criticism (or exasperated shout of “For the last time, stop teasing the dog!”). This ratio can reinforce things like taking turns, walking safely in a parking lot, or setting the table without being asked.

Studies show that when teachers and parents ratchet up their praise, children stay on task more, act out less, and even make faster progress learning to read.

Instead of fretting about going overboard with praise, Dr. Heward suggests focusing on varying the type of praise you give, mixing in a verbal thumbs-up (“Thank you for finishing your homework before using your tablet”) with other positive attention (“When you’re done with your book report, will you tell me about it?”). To remind yourself to praise more often, Dr. Heward offers this technique: Put ten pennies in one pocket at the beginning of the day.

Each time you catch your kid being good, say so (“I love that you and your sister

K I D SÑB e h a v i o r

are playing so well together!”) and move a penny to another pocket. The physical reminder prompts you to look for everything they’re doing right.

If you move all ten pennies, reward yourself with something nice.

Write the right kind of cooperation contract.

Have you ever created a strategy—say, a sticker system to encourage your kid to clean their room—that flopped? Chances are it failed because your kid’s idea of completing a task (bed made, toys stored) doesn’t match your own, Dr. Heward says.

The remedy: a behavioral contract between you and your child. It’s derived from Applied Behavior Analysis (ABA), what Dr. Heward calls “the science of behavior change” that is behind the most

effective education programs for children with autism and other disabilities.

Behavioral contracts specify each step or component of a desired task or activity, as well as the reward for accomplishing that step. The contract must be fair—the reward neither too big nor too small—and signed by both of you. (For prereaders, you can draw or use clip art to visually represent the task and the reward.)

You’ll want to make sure that the reward is immediate (say, a sticker), the prize is motivating (like a mini Hatchimal or a bottle of bubbles), and your expectations are age-appropriate. “Contracting is a research-based strategy to help kids and parents succeed,” Dr. Heward says.

In my household, for example, we laminated morning and evening routine checklists, then signed them as contracts.

D O N ’ T W O R RY

ABOUT RAISING A “PRAISE J U N K I E .” O F F E R KUDOS OFTEN!

Even my 5-year-old, Maxine, recognizes the pictures that I drew illustrating everything she needs to do before bed (wash her face, put dirty clothes in the hamper), and she knows she gets a sticker when she completes her jobs without being nagged. And since both my girls know they get a prize from the goodie bag after they earn five stickers, we don’t have to constantly negotiate about when they’ll get a new tiny toy.

Create a secret code.

Kids of all abilities don’t always have the words to ask for help when they’re getting “emotionally dysregulated” (psychologist-speak for having an outsize response to daily problems).

Dunn recommends coming up with a signal your kid can use when they’re starting to get amped up, like rubbing their hands together.

That’s your cue that your kid needs help calming down. Test out strategies (cuddling, taking a walk, belly breathing) until you find one that works. A friend of mine who’s a social worker sings the alphabet song to her 6-year-old. Without fail, that familiar tune soothes her firstgrader and prevents epic meltdowns.

Eventually, your child may learn to do the same thing to soothe themself.

My husband could predict with stunning accuracy what would set off each child in his classroom, and chances are you know what triggers your child as well. So identify—and then plan for—situations that may spark an outburst.

For example, Edie panics if she’s in a loud environment for long. So before a family wedding a few years back, we created a detailed blueprint for what she could do (draw in her coloring book) and where (on the sofa next to the women’s bathroom) whenever she needed a break from the party. “Empower your child to own what they need to do,” says Dunn. “That alleviates the anxiety of going into a situation they know can be triggering.”

In fact, Dunn recommends that parents do the same, like finding a quiet corner of your house the next time lockdown fatigue sets in. Turns out we grown-ups can learn a few lessons too.

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What are antibiotics, anyway?

Some antibiotics, like penicillin, work by killing bacteria directly—they’re dubbed bactericidal. “This type of antibiotic prevents bacteria from forming their protective wall or making the components they need to live,” says Stacey L. SchultzCherry, Ph.D., an infectiousdisease expert at St. Jude Children’s Research Hospital, in Memphis. Other antibiotics, like erythromycin, work more indirectly by causing the bacteria to stop multiplying without outright killing them.

These are called bacteriostatic antibiotics (often prescribed for ear infections). “They can work with the immune system to fight the infection,” explains Dr. Schultz-Cherry.

Infection Fighters 101 While you may think of antibiotics as a cure-all, they aren’t the answer for every illness. We asked experts to weigh in on your top questions about these meds.

by N I C O L E B L A D E S / photographs by T R AV I S R AT H B O N E

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What can antibiotics cure?

Even though we’re staying home more, kids can still pick up run-of-the-mill illnesses, and these prescribed meds can be the magic pill you’re looking for to help them feel better fast, says Lisa Stern, M.D., a pediatrician at Tenth Street Pediatrics, in Santa Monica, California. But there’s a big catch. “Antibiotics fight only infections caused by bacteria—they have no potency against viruses,” Dr. Stern explains. Bacteria are pretty sneaky, because they’re living, replicating, and dividing in your body all the time, says Dr. Schultz-Cherry.

How do doctors know if your kid has a viral or a bacterial infection?

The truth is, sometimes it’s tough to differentiate between the two. “The

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dosage, timing, or effects, says Yvonne Maldonado, M.D., Parents advisor and professor of pediatrics, global health, and infectious disease at Stanford University School of Medicine.

“Yucky!”

If your kid hates the taste of medicine, some pharmacists can add flavoring.

ever-so-slight variation of mucus color could determine what your kid is sick with. Viral pneumonia, for example, may come with clear mucus and a mild fever, whereas a bacterial infection may bring yellow or green mucus and a high fever,” Dr. Schultz-Cherry says. However, a viral infection can also develop into a secondary bacterial infection while your body is trying to recover from a virus like a cold or even influenza. “The most common types of secondary bacterial infections in children include ear infections, sinus infections, and pneumonia,” explains Kimberly Montez, M.D., M.P.H., a Parents advisor and assistant professor of pediatrics at Wake Forest School of Medicine, in WinstonSalem, North Carolina. The good news is that kids are great at letting their bodies do the talking, Dr. Montez says.

“Children with bacterial infections may not want to eat and will appear tired

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or will sleep more than usual.” Or if they’re not peeing as often, they may be dehydrated, another sign that something is amiss and that you should take them to the pediatrician’s office.

Certain tests help your doctor figure out whether your kid’s infection is bacterial or viral, says Mason Gomberg, M.D., a pediatrician at White Plains Hospital Physician Associates, in New York. “They might include blood work, cultures taken from your child’s throat, urine, or blood, or a chest X-ray.”

These results, along with an exam and a health history, will help determine if your child has a bacterial infection.

How do doctors know which antibiotic to prescribe?

Your provider will know which antibiotic will be effective for the infection your child has, but you can always bring up any concerns about the antibiotic choice,

Why do some kids get upset stomachs from antibiotics?

Antibiotics not only kill or alter the bad bacteria, but they can also disrupt the gut’s normal flora, or good bacteria, that help keep our digestive tract healthy, says Amna Husain, M.D., a pediatrician and founder of Pure Direct Pediatrics, in Marlboro, New Jersey. This unfortunate side effect usually shows up as nausea or diarrhea. “Taking a probiotic while on antibiotics will help restore your child’s good gut bacteria,” says Dr. Husain.

When your child is prescribed an antibiotic, ask their pediatrician about which probiotic might be most effective.

Physicians also often recommend that kids take certain antibiotics with a meal.

One reason is that eating while downing an antibiotic can help mask the not-sogreat taste. But the bacteria can also mess with the normal balance of your kid’s digestive tract, so it’s often easier to tolerate medications on a full stomach.

“Even if your kid is feeling under the weather or says they’re not hungry, encourage them to take the meds with

5 MOST COMMON ANTIBIOTICS GIVEN TO KIDS 1. Amoxicillin Prescribed to treat ear infections, strep throat, sinusitis, and pneumonia 2. Azithromycin Used for pneumonia and pertussis, and for kids with a penicillin-related allergy 3. Cephalexin Typically given to tackle skin or urinary tract infections 4. Clindamycin An oral antibiotic for skin infections, and for infections in kids with a penicillin-related allergy 5. Trimethoprim-sulfamethoxazole An alternate med for skin or urinary tract infections Source: Yvonne Maldonado, M.D., Parents advisor and professor of pediatrics, global health, and infectious disease at Stanford University School of Medicine.

All It Takes Is A Shake™ ®/™ Trademarks © Mars, Incorporated 2020. TEMPTATIONS™ Cloud design is a trademark.

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a banana or a cracker,” suggests Suzanne Soliman, Pharm.D., founder and president of the Pharmacist Moms Group.

Can antibiotics do more harm than good?

Some antibiotics are what we call broad-spectrum, meaning they kill a wide range of bacteria. “When we don’t know the exact bacterium causing the infection, we prescribe one of these,” says Dr. Gomberg. “The unfortunate thing is, a broad-spectrum antibiotic, such as doxycycline, will kill the good bacteria along with the bad. This can lead to an increase in bacterial antibiotic resistance and is one reason why antibiotics should be used only when absolutely necessary.”

If antibiotics change the intestinal flora and get rid of good bacteria in the gut, Dr. Gomberg explains, an invasive gastrointestinal bacterium called Clostridium difficile (or C. diff) can take over in the colon and cause nausea, belly pain, fever, severe diarrhea, and, in rare cases, life-threatening inflammation of the colon.

What exactly is antibiotic resistance?

Through repeated use and misuse of antibiotics in the general population, bacteria can change, mutate, and become resistant to a specific medication. “It’s scary because it means that someday an antibiotic may stop working,” says Grace Averitt, D.O., a pediatrician at Austin Regional Clinic. “We can help prevent antibiotic resistance by taking antibiotics exactly as prescribed, not taking other people’s, and taking them only for bacterial illnesses.”

If your child is being prescribed antibiotics frequently, Dr. Averitt strongly suggests that you ask why they’re needed and discuss this concern with your pediatrician, who can help you find other fixes for the problem. For example, if your child has frequent strep-throat infections, “they may need to be referred to a specialist to evaluate possibly removing their tonsils,” she says.

Why do some taste so horrible?

You can blame the chemical structures of certain medications for that terrible taste,

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says Megan N. Freeland, Pharm.D., a pharmacist in Atlanta. If you ask, some pharmacists may be able to add flavoring to your child’s medication to make it more appealing. “If it’s a liquid form, try using a syringe to squirt the medication into your child’s lower cheek in short bursts instead of directly onto the tongue all at once,” Dr. Freeland says. If your child absolutely refuses to open up and take the medicine or cannot keep down a liquid antibiotic, Dr. Freeland suggests asking your doctor if there’s a better-tasting alternative, a chewable, or an injection option (if your kid tolerates needles, that is). “My 3-year-old recently

refused to take his amoxicillin for an ear infection, even with the bubble-gum flavoring,” says Parents senior features editor Katie Arnold-Ratliff. “Our pediatrician recommended getting a shot of antibiotics injected into each of his legs instead. While my son didn’t enjoy the shots much, either, within two days his earache was gone.”

Teach Your Kid How to Swallow a Pill Simply hover your phone’s camera over the smart code for tips to make taking oral meds easier.

When Are Antibiotics Helpful?

These are some of the most common illnesses your kid might encounter and how docs typically treat them.

Ear infection “Some ear infections can be caused by viruses,” Amna Husain, M.D., says. In those cases, antibiotics wouldn’t help. Instead, docs might recommend putting a warm cloth on the affected ear or taking acetaminophen or ibuprofen to deal with the pain. The routine Hib vaccine can also protect against Haemophilus influenzae, a bacterium responsible for ear and other more serious infections.

SOMETIMES HELPFUL .

Strep throat

sinusitis.” Some toddlers might also have swelling around one eye. A runny nose can be a symptom of COVID-19, so if you think you or your kid may have been exposed to the virus, get tested.

Acute upper respiratory infection (URI) You’ve seen it before: runny nose, nasal congestion, sneezing, coughing. Basically, it’s a common cold, one of the most typical illnesses in kids. Since it’s a virus, antibiotics won’t help.

NEVER HELPFUL .

Icky but true: Most kids walk around with strep living dormant in their throat, says Michael B. Grosso, M.D., medical director at Huntington Hospital, Northwell Health, in New York. While most sore throats are caused by viruses, pain shouldn’t go ignored, especially if it comes without cold symptoms (like a cough or a runny nose) or if your kid also has a headache or a tummy ache. If strep is not treated, it can lead to rheumatic heart disease (permanent damage to valves in the heart), so you should go in for a test.

Pneumonia can be caused by bacteria or viruses and comes with symptoms such as a cough that produces mucus, as well as vomiting, diarrhea, or fever. If your child is recovering from a cold, they might develop a secondary bacterial infection, such as bacterial pneumonia. Walking pneumonia is very common in kids and typically stems from the bacterium Mycoplasma pneumoniae. A lab test can determine which one your child has.

Sinus infection

Urinary tract infection (UTI)

Most runny noses are due to the common cold, Dr. Grosso says. “However, if your child has a runny nose and day-and-night coughing, and is not getting better after ten to 14 days, it could be bacterial

“These are fairly common in the first year of life,” says Dr. Grosso. Symptoms can include vomiting, poor feeding, or diarrhea.

Pain while peeing because of a UTI generally happens later in childhood.

A LWAYS H E L P F U L .

SOMETIMES HELPFUL .

Pneumonia SOMETIMES HELPFUL .

A LWAYS H E L P F U L .

K I D S Ñ H e a lt h Ne w s

Check the pollen count before you plan your day.

Go to pollen.aaaai.org, or google “pollen count” and your zip code.

“Dad, My Back Hurts!”

Three common kid back problems, and how to fix them

Midday S U N G L A S S E S . They can reduce

Ease Allergies All Day Cool fact: Allergy symptoms may be less severe this year because of—drumroll, please—masks! Wearing one means your kid will inhale less pollen than usual. Practice these other strategies to reduce seasonal sniffles and sneezes.

Morning LI M I T O U T D O O R AC T I V I T I E S .

Pollen counts are usually highest between 5 and 10 a.m., so save playing outside for later in the day, if possible, says Stanley Goldstein, M.D., director of Allergy & Asthma

NEWS TO SMILE ABOUT

Care of Long Island, in Rockville Centre, New York.

KEEP WINDOWS CLOSED.

Shutting them reduces the amount of pollen inside your home and keeps it from settling on surfaces. If it’s hot, flip on the air conditioner.

the amount of pollen that gets into your kid’s eyes outside.

W I P E ’ E M D O W N . “When your child comes inside, wash their face and around their eyes to remove pollen,” says Robert Wood, M.D., director of pediatric allergy and immunology at Johns Hopkins Children’s Center.

Also, brush off their shoes, change clothes, and wash their hands. If your pet goes outdoors, wipe it down, too, so it doesn’t track pollen throughout the house.

Evening Have your child bathe or shower and wash their hair to shed any pollen before getting into bed.

G I V E M E D S . Go for a 24-hour antihistamine. They take time to kick in, so giving them before bed means they’ll be in full effect during the morning hours and school activities.

W A S H U P.

—Tamekia Reece

1 / Extra feeding help for

2 / Fewer kids are drinking

new moms is now here.

sugary beverages. Only

Hospitals are better at assisting parents with breastfeeding and formula education, shows the CDC’s 2020 Breastfeeding Report Card. The average national score was 92 out of 100. Breastfeeding moms, for example, are learning how to recognize feeding cues, and formula-feeding moms are learning more effective feeding techniques.

3.3 percent of kids slurp more than 500 calories of sugarladen drinks like soda per day, according to the Journal of the Academy of Nutrition and Dietetics. That’s down from the 10.9 percent seen in data from 2003 to 2004. The number likely dropped because of media and public awareness, publichealth policies, and healthier options offered at restaurants.

—T.R.

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BAD POSTURE

Hunching over homework or digital devices can cause a dull ache or tightness in the neck and upper back. Have your kid take breaks to stretch and run around. Make sure their schoolwork space is set up for proper posture too: They need a supportive chair with a backrest and a desk that places their screen at eye level.

S P O RT S I NJ U RY

A sudden increase in activity or repetitive movements done with bad form or not enough rest can take their toll. Even a little kid can experience pain during or soon after playing a sport. Take a break for five to seven days or until they can perform normal daily tasks without pain. Massage or a warm bath may provide some relief. If not, contact your pediatrician.

WONKY SLEEPING

Some kiddos may wake up in the morning with a mild ache or soreness in their neck or upper or lower back after snoozing in an awkward way. No worries: The pain usually improves once they get up and stretch a bit. If it doesn’t or if the pain persists or comes with a fever or other worrisome symptoms, call your child’s doctor.

Sources: Michael Breneman, a physical therapist at Dayton Children’s Hospital, in Ohio; Michelle Caird, M.D., a pediatric orthopedic surgeon at Michigan Medicine C.S. Mott Children’s Hospital, in Ann Arbor.

—T.R.

THIS PAGE, FROM TOP: PANSFUN IMAGES/STOCKSY; NASTASIC/GETTY IMAGES. OPPOSITE: STEPHANIE RAUSSER.

H AV E YO U R K I D W E A R

Boost Their Brainpower In the first year, your cutie goes from depending on you for everything, to babbling, moving, and even feeding themself. That’s all thanks to your marvelous mentoring! Nurture their growth even more with these activities.

sound does the car make?

Vroom!”) Really get into it!

Point at objects on the page and change your voice for each character. Board books in bright colors that make noise or fold out are great for young babies. By 6 to 12 months, they’ll like books with images of faces, shapes, or animals.

Talk their little ears off.

The more words your baby hears, the easier it will be to learn how to produce sounds needed for language. Talking to your baby also teaches them about the rhythms of conversation. (“Should we put on socks?” “Gah!” “Yes, we should!”) Your child might have less interaction with adults and kids these days, but you can fill in the gaps by narrating your routine. (“It’s bathtime now!”) Imitate your baby’s sounds and encourage them to imitate yours. Playing social language games, like peekaboo during that bath, also builds early talking skills.

PROJECT B A BY Your Guide to Infant Basics

Be their cheerleader.

Get that tummy time on.

Bust out the books.

It’s your baby’s warm-up to sitting, crawling, and walking; it builds upper-body and core strength; it exercises fine motor skills; and it exposes your little one to new sights.

If your baby is uneasy at first (most are), lay them on your chest while you recline on the floor. Pick a time when they’re alert—a tired baby and tummy time do not mix. Once your baby has transitioned fully to the floor, set out toys for them to grab. Your sweetie can begin tummy time pretty much from birth. Start slow with just two to five minutes a few times a day. By a year old, they should be able to handle up to 20 minutes.

Reading exposes your baby to new words and language sounds, and engaging in backand-forth reading makes them an active participant. (“The car goes vroom! What

Holding your baby, smiling at them, and reassuring them when they’re trying something new helps them feel cared for. This important emotionaldevelopment milestone enables them to take risks, explore, and learn. Babies

with a secure attachment (the strong bond that forms between a baby and guardian from consistent care) have been shown to develop at a more appropriate rate because they’re more willing to be independent, like taking a first step. Steady routines during the day (like bath and rubber-duck time every night at 6 p.m., followed by pajamas and stories) can also help this attachment grow, as your baby can anticipate what will occur.

Make fun number one.

Playtime helps your baby learn about their environment, understand cause and effect (picking something up and dropping it), and see how things work (raising their hand to check out the rattle in it). You can even encourage pretend play. Keep it low-key by giving them a cup and seeing if they try to sip from it. Simply learning about new things helps their brain build important connections.

Sources: April A. Benasich, Ph.D., director of the Infancy Studies Laboratory at the Center for Molecular & Behavioral Neuroscience at Rutgers University, in Newark, New Jersey; Nia J. Heard-Garris, M.D., a physician-scientist at Ann & Robert H. Lurie Children’s Hospital of Chicago and Northwestern University Feinberg School of Medicine; Prachi Shah, M.D., a developmental and behavioral pediatrician at Michigan Medicine C.S. Mott Children’s Hospital, in Ann Arbor.

—Amaris Castillo

3 Facts About Brain Development 300

¼

MOMMY

The approximate number of words kids can say and use by 24 months old, according to a report in MacArthur-Bates Communicative Development Inventories. By the time they graduate from high school, that number will skyrocket to 60,000 words.

The average relative size of a newborn’s brain compared with the average size of an adult’s.

By their first year, a baby’s brain doubles in size.

Babies’ most common first word in 11 of 15 languages studied by MacArthur-Bates Communicative Development Inventories, including American English and Mexican Spanish. The second most common word in ten of those languages? Daddy.

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PREP THE ROOM Whether he’s sleeping at home or napping at his grandparents’ house, we like to keep Sascha’s sleep environment consistent.

I think having a dark room is really helpful, especially for daytime naps, so we start by closing the blackout curtains.

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KI D SÑA dv i c e

10 Highly Subjective Reasons to Get a Pet You worry about the commitment, the cost, the chaos. You wonder, “Do we really need an extra creature to care for right now?” Yes, you definitely do, says this veteran mom and pet lover—who has some science to back her up.

by C AT H E R I N E N E W M A N / illustrations by VA L E R I A P E T R O N E

WHEN THE KIDS

were little, I craved an extra body in my lap like I craved another hole in my head or more applesauce in my hair.

We didn’t have a pet and didn’t want one. We couldn’t deal with anyone else demanding to be fed or entertained or not bathed; we didn’t feel like fretting about another creature; and we didn’t want to hear more noise coming out of anybody, even if it was just the happy chuffing of another well-loved animal. Our cups were full. Full to overflowing.

To be honest, what we needed was not a fuller cup but a mop.

But we might have been wrong. Our pussycat Craney Crow—who we got when the kids were 10 and 7—changed our lives completely and for the best.

Likewise Snapper Cat, who came to us seven years later. Both of them give us all so much more than they have ever taken. “What if we’d never gotten the cats?” we like to ask each other rhetorically, our eyes wide, just to scare ourselves for fun. Or “What did we even do before the cats?” Because the cats are still our main activity.

It is not uncommon to be summoned urgently to a room where you are instructed to behold this or that cat peacefully sleeping. “Have you ever seen anything cuter in your life?”

You don’t respond by getting out the human baby albums and saying, “Well ...” You just say, “Never.”

There are about 90 million pet dogs and 94 million pet cats living in the United States right now—maybe more since the pandemic. And while each

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Real strawberries. one of those animals brings something unique to its people, here are some of the recurring benefits.

1

Pets are furry.

Okay, that’s not always true and it’s not an advantage in and of itself.

But it might be related to the fact that petting soft animals makes us feel better—and that is a fact. Shelby Wanser, of the Human-Animal Interaction Lab at Oregon State University, Corvallis, says, “There’s an oxytocin feedback loop between pets and owners.” Studies show that oxytocin—the relaxing hormone we associate with falling in love and breastfeeding—is increased by being with a pet. Plus, playing with your pet can increase your levels of endorphins, more happy-making brain chemicals to add to the lovepotion cocktail your pet-loving brain is mixing up for you. Despite their standoffish reputation, this is true even of cats. The kids pet the cats; the cats purr; the kids feel happy and relaxed; the kids pet the cats some more. Full disclosure: Before the cats, we had a fish, Arthur. He and the kids were in more of a dullness feedback loop. No offense to your gecko, but fur might be key.

2

washing his face! He licks his stripy little paw and then uses it to clean his perfect little whiskery face!” Exactly.

This is a person who actually kept an illustrated “Craney Observation Journal” when Craney was a kitten, which resulted in reams of her perfect, agonized handwriting. (“He does not like being shooken around.” True!)

Studies of classroom pets show similar advantages, including improved literacy.

Says the Human Animal Bond Research Institute, “Children have reported liking the animal and enjoying reading to them, increasing their motivation

TH E CAT U N ITE D TH E M I N TH E IR D OTI N G. LOVIN G C R AN E Y FRE E D TH E M FRO M S IB LIN G RIVALRY, TH E SAM E WAY THAT HAVIN G A BABY HAD MAD E TH E IR FATH E R AN D M E C LO S E R AS A C O U PLE .

Pets make kids smarter.

One study suggests that kids with pets might learn language more quickly and end up with better verbal skills.

The pet functions “both as a patient recipient of the young child’s babble and as an attractive stimulus, eliciting verbal communication from young children in the form of praise, orders, encouragement, and punishment.”

(Anyone who has witnessed a child chastising an animal or whispering into its ear will understand this.)

This is my favorite part of that same study: “The pet may also serve as a subject of conversations that stimulate vocabulary building, when caregivers and children talk about what the pet is doing.” I just read that quote aloud to my daughter, Birdy, who is 18 now, and she laughed and said, in her own little-kid voice, “The cat is washing! Look, look, he’s

to read.” If you’ve ever walked in on the scene of a rapt dog (or bored cat) listening to a child read aloud to it from On the Banks of Plum Creek, this will not surprise you. And as animalbehavior expert Zazie Todd, Ph.D., author of Wag: The Science of Making Your Dog Happy, says, “If pets reduce children’s stress, then the children can learn better, since stress interferes with learning.” (Weirdly, my own childhood cat’s name was Zazie.)

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Pets can help you heal.

Long after we’d finished deliberately enlarging our family, I got pregnant again by accident and had a miscarriage.

Then I got pregnant again, this time on purpose, and miscarried again.

My obstetrician had shaken her head

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sadly and cited my tragic old-lady uterus, sitting deflated on the floor of my pelvis. There would be no more babies. The kitten we had just gotten helped heal me: the furry smallness of him in our bed; his needy little self; his kneady little paws with their inexplicable corn-chip smell. Plus, the cats will likely be here with us still after both kids are gone from our home, off at college, out into the world, living their own lives. It makes me understand why my own parents got a puppy after my brother and I left for college. (Although my mom admits now that the dog lying under the dining table after we’d returned to school, sighing and inconsolable, with her heartbroken eyebrows pulled up, really amplified her own sadness.)

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Pets give kids experience with grief.

Do what’s

I almost wrote “practice with grief,” except it’s not practice—it’s as pure and profound as almost any grief they’ll experience. (Although when Arthur went belly-up, we read poems at his fishy little graveside, and it was definitely more performance than anguish.) After Zazie (the cat) crossed over to the great litter box in the sky, I cried for a week. My eyes would well up just looking at the poster for Marley & Me because it was so obvious where the story was headed. As the novelist Carol Anshaw once put it, “Taking on a pet is a contract with sorrow.” Whether this actually constitutes a benefit of pet ownership is debatable, of course. But great loss is twinned, always and forever, with great love; our kids have to learn this eventually.”

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Pets keep kids healthier.

Studies suggest that pets reduce anxiety and depression in kids, and that spending time with a cat lowers kids’ heart rate and blood pressure.

Walking a dog has particular benefits: exercise, I believe this is called. And according to an infographic I didn’t understand, cats purr at a frequency of 20 to 140 hertz, which is supposed to be healing and therapeutic, and it’s even supposed to mend broken

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bones. Whatever the hertz rate, I know that when one of the kids is sick, the cats come and curl around their legs like little vibrating hot-water bottles, and the patient feels better.

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Pets let kids be their zaniest selves.

Early on, we developed a personality for each of our cats—Craney, the crotchety old grump, and Snapper, the baby who says naughty things—and have spoken in their voices ever since. But, like, constantly. “Craney, smell my butt,” Snapper says. (He’s so bad!) Craney responds, “Snapper, leave me alone.

You’re disgusting.” We can do this all day. I described this to Wanser, of the Human-Animal Interaction Lab. I was wondering if there’s something about these conversations that allows the kids to express stuff as the cats—certain kinds of crassness or crankiness—that they would be unable or unwilling to express otherwise. Wanser confessed that they and their roommate also talk to each other all the time in their cat’s voice. “I try to avoid anthropomorphizing animals in my research,” Wanser explained. “But that really doesn’t stop me from developing personalities for my pets at home.” I felt totally validated by science.

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Pets bond people.

Related to our cat conversations, I’d wondered if there was research about pets successfully triangulating relationships among the people in a household. We got Craney when the kids were little and often bubbling over with mutual irritation. (“Can you please not talk about potato chips in a baby voice?” “Well, can you please not speak to me so meanly, especially when I am wanting to play with your LEGO castle?”) And the cat united them in their doting. Their common purpose—loving Craney—freed them from sibling rivalry, the same way that having a baby had made their father and me closer as a couple (except in the night, when they were newborns). Even now, at 21 and 18, the kids send each other cat TikToks and cat memes and videos of our own cats sleeping, and the kids are

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simply more connected to each other because of the cats. This made sense to Wanser, who speculated, “If there’s a tangible being shared between individuals, it would make sense to me that the shared interest and shared experience would promote a bond between those individuals.”

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Pets cultivate empathy.

Dr. Todd puts it this way: “You learn to observe the dog’s and cat’s body language, and it gives you insight into what someone who’s not you is feeling.”

She cited a study of young adults in the U.S., ages 18 to 26: Those who’d been involved in caring for a pet were more inclined to help neighbors and friends.

One study of child development concluded, “Companion animals can help children learn to express and

understand nonverbal communication and decipher intentions, which leads to improved emotional understanding and expression.” In other words, the pets can’t talk, so you have to pay close attention to what they’re trying to tell you, which, the logic goes, teaches you to pay close attention to other beings—like people, for example—and their needs. “Does it seem like he likes that?” I’d ask Birdy when she ruffled the cat’s fur in the wrong direction.

And she’d look at his glowering face and admit, “Not exactly.” That’s rudimentary empathy.

Pets teach kids responsibility.

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While it’s true that kids are famous for making myriad promises before getting a pet—“I’ll walk it!” “I’ll

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scoop the litter!”—and then falling mysteriously off the planet when it comes time to, say, scrape a hair ball from the carpet or give the lizard his midday meal of live crickets, kids do rise to the occasion of care.

And the advantages of that rising are enormous. As Wanser described it to me, “One of the developmental benefits of having pets in the home is that children gain more of a sense of capability and independence. And a greater concept of their ability to make a difference—to improve the life of their pet by taking them for a walk, by feeding them when they’re hungry, by playing with them when they’re bored” and by pulling back the cat’s lips so you can see their microscopically tiny front teeth.

(Okay, I added that last one.) And, Wanser said, “Kids get to recognize their impact—on pets and maybe, by extension, on people too.” This might be why (in addition to the besotted doting of a dog), pets are associated with generally higher self-esteem in children.

Pets help ease the tough teenage years.

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You might not believe it, if they’re still skittering underfoot, but it’s true: Someday your child will be a teenager.

Maybe they will still cuddle in your lap, but probably not. You know who they will still cuddle, though? The pet. (And when your kids are even older, they’ll come home to see those pets too.

Pets can be a kind of glue.) Dogs are accepting, nonjudgmental sources of unconditional love, which is just what teenagers need when the world can feel so harsh and unjust. Pets forgive, share their feelings authentically, and offer calm, grounding support. Over the past year, while my daughter and her friends have not been able to gather and loll around all over each other like a litter of puppies, our cats—and the physical affection they offer—have been more important than ever. “Come lie in my arms forever,” Birdy says, dragging the cats up to her face so she can kiss their cheeks and striped foreheads. And I want to say the same to her—but I know better.

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Honest Advice for Prospective Pet Owners What to consider before deciding it’s time to start caring for a creature

Pet ownership isn’t for everyone. Pets are expensive and potentially allergenic, and they require steady, long-term care and supervision—and inviting an animal into your home does come with risks.

Dogs have been known to bite small children, and some pets can have health or behavioral issues that make their care challenging, according to Dr. Zazie Todd. “People shouldn’t feel guilty if a pet turns out to be a bad fit for them,” she says. “It’s much better to recognize that and find the animal a better home.” If you do choose to get a pet, Dr. Todd recommends locating a responsible, small-scale breeder or rescue shelter and avoiding, at all costs, large commercial breeders—“mills”—in which the pets haven’t been properly socialized in a home environment.

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F U N F O R T H E F A M I LY

S P E C I A L PA R T N E R S E C T I O N

After a day building sand castles, searching for seashells and exploring Captiva Island, park yourselves in front of the firepit for gooey s’mores at South Seas Island Resort.

Afterward, kids can run and play on the beach while parents watch from the tiki bar.

FOR FAMILIES EYEING A TRIP IN THE FUTURE, WE HOPE YOU FEEL SAFE AND INSPIRED TO JOIN US ON THE BEACHES OF FORT MYERS & SANIBEL.

Families staying at this sprawling sanctuary (it covers nearly half of Captiva Island) will feel free as a breeze. Bike paths pass the marina, private beach, pools (with waterslide and tiki bar), golf course and tennis courts. Don’t miss the nightly Sunset Shellebration event!

SIX MILE CYPRESS SLOUGH PRESERVE All ages can take this walk on the wild side.

A 1.2-mile boardwalk traverses the slough— a long, narrow wetland that’s home to alligators, turtles, otters and wading birds. Delight in the Rock and Stroll Garden, a haven for native butterflies, before you hit the road.

G R E AT B L U E H E R O N

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U Y n the menu: uthern tastes like chees grits r buttermilk biscuits and sausage grav Y u ll l ve the un dec r t — retr -ins ired tables and chairs stri ed wall a er and a “curtain” b ttles K Y K G U Paddle thr ugh mangr ve tunnels and shall w ba s teeming with wildli e like d l hins turtles manatees s re egrets and her ns as the sk bursts int lames c l r

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Take the Cake!

Kids will go bananas for this light and festive confection from pastry chef Zoë François’s new cookbook, Zoë Bakes Cakes.

It’s fruity, creamy, and totally a-peeling for Easter celebrations. photograph by Z O Ë F R A N Ç O I S

Banana Cream Cake Active Time 30 minutes Total Time 1 hour 10 minutes, plus 1 hour cooling Makes one 9x13-in. sheet cake

I N G R E DI E N T S Butter for greasing the pan 3 cups all-purpose flour 21⁄4 cups granulated sugar 21⁄4 tsp. baking powder 1⁄4 tsp. baking soda 3⁄4 tsp. kosher salt 2 cups mashed very ripe bananas (about 4 large), plus 3 bananas, sliced (7 bananas total) 3⁄4 cup vegetable oil 1 Tbs. pure vanilla extract 3 large eggs, at room temperature 1 cup heavy whipping cream 1 cup chopped walnuts (optional) 1 recipe Pastry Cream, chilled (see page 40) 1 recipe Perfect Whipped Cream (see page 40) MAKE IT

1. Preheat oven to 350°F. Butter a 9x13-in. pan, then line with buttered parchment paper.

2. Whisk together flour, sugar, baking powder, baking soda, and salt in a large bowl until well combined.

Now that your family has perfected banana bread, here’s your next challenge! The whipped cream looks just like bunny tails.

3. Whisk together mashed bananas, oil, vanilla, and eggs in a medium bowl.

4. Add banana mixture to flour mixture and stir together until just combined.

5. Using a whisk, whip heavy cream to medium peaks. Fold whipped cream into batter, then fold in walnuts, if using.

6. Pour batter into prepared pan and spread evenly using an offset spatula. Gently tap the pan on the counter several times to release air bubbles.

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dinnertime is family time

Chicken-Bacon-Ranch Crescent Ring me o h t ea mad

Visit Pillsbury.com for recipes and inspiration.

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7. Bake until a wooden pick inserted into the center comes out clean, 40 to 45 minutes.

Let cool completely before removing from pan, then invert it onto a platter.

Pastry Cream, Step by Step Master this rich, luscious pudding that you can use in all kinds of desserts, from tiramisu to Boston cream pie.

8. To assemble, stir Pastry Cream until smooth, then fold in 1 cup Perfect Whipped Cream.

Spread Pastry Cream mixture over cake, then cover with sliced bananas. Spread with an offset spatula or pipe (Zoë uses Ateco star tip #869) remaining whipped cream over bananas.

Store, covered, in refrigerator for up to 24 hours.

Pastry Cream Active Time 20 minutes Total Time 35 minutes Makes about 21⁄2 cups

I N G R E DI E N T S 2 cups whole milk 1/2 cup granulated sugar 1⁄4 cup unsalted butter 1 pinch kosher salt 2 tsp. pure vanilla extract 3 Tbs. cornstarch 1 large egg, plus 4 egg yolks, at room temperature

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MAKE IT

1. Combine milk, 1/4 cup of the sugar, butter, salt, and vanilla in a medium saucepan over medium heat (see Photo 1). Bring to a gentle boil, then remove from heat.

2. Whisk together cornstarch and remaining 1/4 cup sugar in a medium bowl. Add egg and egg yolks and whisk into a smooth paste (see Photo 2).

3. Whisk enough hot-milk mixture, a little at a time, into egg mixture until warm to the touch. Once eggs are tempered, pour mixture back into remaining milk mixture in pan.

4. Return saucepan to mediumhigh heat and bring mixture to a boil; continuously whisk for 3 minutes more or pastry cream will separate once it cools.

5. If there are any lumps in your pastry cream, strain it through a fine-mesh strainer into a shallow container (see Photo 3).

Cover with plastic wrap pressed directly onto surface to prevent a skin from forming (see Photo 4).

6. Place enough ice cubes and cold water in a large bowl to create a bath for the container

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3

to sit in without water breaching the sides.

7. Set container in ice bath or place in freezer until chilled, about 15 minutes. Or transfer to an airtight container and store in refrigerator up to 3 days.

Perfect Whipped Cream Active Time 5 minutes Total Time 5 minutes Makes about 3 cups

I N G R E DI E N T S 2 cups heavy whipping cream

4

2 Tbs. confectioners’ sugar 1 tsp. pure vanilla extract MAKE IT

Beat cream, confectioners’ sugar, and vanilla in a stand mixer fitted with the whisk attachment, on medium speed, until just thick—it will start to leave marks from the whisk in the cream. Remove bowl from mixer and, using whisk attachment, continue whipping by hand until cream reaches desired consistency.

Best used immediately.

Reprinted from ZOË BAKES CAKES: Everything You Need to Know to Make Your Favorite Layers, Bundts, Loaves, and More, to be published on March 16, 2021, by Ten Speed Press, an imprint of Random House, a division of Penguin Random House LLC. Copyright © 2021 by Zoë François.

Pastry Cream process photographs by Sarah Kieffer.

©2018 Wm. Wrigley Jr. Company. STARBURST and all affiliated designs are trademarks of Wm. Wrigley Jr. Company.

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THE BOOK NOOK Your monthly guide to making the most of storytime and raising forever readers

3. My Father’s Dragon: Deluxe Illustrated Edition

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The keepsake version of the 1948 fantasy about a boy who runs away to rescue a baby dragon gets a glow-up from Perez Garcia’s gouache and watercolor paintings. (Ruth Chrisman Gannett’s original drawings are still included.)

Filled with warmth and whimsy, the story holds up so well that Netflix has commissioned a film adaptation. Ages 6 to 9

5 New Titles to Pick Up Now 1. Blue Floats Away Written by Travis Jonker, illustrated by Grant Snider

4. Billy Miller Makes a Wish

Who would have thought that learning about the water cycle could give you all the feels?

And yet our hearts tug for Blue, a glacier that breaks off from his parents, shrinks until he transforms into a rain cloud, and (spoiler) eventually makes his way back home as snow. A genius metaphor for growing up and a relatable climate story at the same time, the book strikes an emotional chord that might just inspire kids to take action.

Ages 4 to 8

Written and illustrated by Kevin Henkes

gem still has it.

Written by Annie Barrows, illustrated by Sophie Blackall

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Lazy-day good times

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5

When Billy turns 8, he wishes for something exciting to happen, but his wish comes true in a way he never intended.

Masterful storytelling has readers riding Billy’s emotional roller coaster: guilt over making the wish, frustration with his younger sister’s behavior, and redemption after a wonderful thing happens. Though this story stands on its own, kids who want to spend more time with Billy can pick up the 2014 Newbery Honor winner The Year of Billy Miller. Ages 7 to 10

5. Summertime Sleepers Written by Melissa Stewart, illustrated by Sarah S. Brannen Hibernating in the summer is a thing for some animals, and Stewart, a science writer, hooks kids on the concept of estivation from page 1. Fun facts about the sleeping habits of a dozen animals like spotted turtles and desert hedgehogs help kids realize that nature is so cool. Brannen’s watercolors depicting the species while active and at rest add to the wow factor. Ages 6 to 9

COURTESY OF THE PUBLISHERS.

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This 1940s

2. Ivy + Bean Get to Work!

Second-grade besties and neighbors Ivy and Bean get their last hurrah in the final installment of this 12-book series that captivates beginning readers with the girls’ mischievous antics.

In true Ivy and Bean fashion, their last adventure together—searching for buried treasure—starts off on the wrong foot but ends spectacularly. Young fans come away with food for thought about what really makes something highly coveted. Dare we say these stories qualify? Ages 6 to 9

Written by Ruth Stiles Gannett, illustrated by Ruth Chrisman Gannett and Helena Perez Garcia

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K I D SÑR e a d i n g

PR E S S PL AY !

Turn car time (or anytime) into reading time with these three podcasts.

The Story Seeds Podcast

Alyssa Milano Plants a Seed The actor and activist inspires budding environmentalists in the fourth book of her middle-grade series. about their day and get quiet time.

As they go to their rooms, I’ll spend a few minutes with each of them, talking or reading stories. The kids love books by Mo Willems like Don’t Let the Pigeon Drive the Bus! and Shel Silverstein’s The Giving Tree, which they call “the crying book” because we all have a big cry when we read it.

She might always be Phoebe from Charmed to you, but tweens know Alyssa Milano as the author of the popular middle-grade series Hope. The fourth installment, Project Go Green, focuses on how sixth-grader Hope Roberts can help protect the planet, and it aptly comes out two weeks before Earth Day. Milano took inspo from her family’s eco habits. “We’re dedicated recyclers,” says the mom of Milo, 9, and Elizabella, 6. Parents asked Milano about her family life and writing career; she has also penned a book about baseball for adults and a graphic-novel series for teens.

How did you develop the character of Hope Roberts? We rarely talk

about middle school in a positive way.

We think about kids being mean to each other and the strife that comes with transitioning into adulthood.

I wanted Hope to be someone kids look to and see something different, someone who is positive and taking charge of her own power, but who still looks like she could live in their world.

What’s bedtime like at your house?

Oh, I love bedtime. Usually, the kids bundle into bed with me, and we talk

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How have you diversified your kids’ home library? My husband, David,

and I try to make sure every bookstore trip ends up with books for each of us that are written by someone who doesn’t look like us. We’ve recently gotten into Kwame Alexander’s work.

If you could voice a children’s book character, who would it be? I mean,

who wouldn’t love to be Coraline? I read somewhere that Neil Gaiman said Coraline was an adventure story for kids and a horror story for adults, and I totally get why. She is fearless, creative, and so, so smart.

Julie’s Library The familiar voice of the original Mary Poppins soothes the family. Julie Andrews and her daughter, literary expert Emma Walton Hamilton, read one or two picture books in each segment. There’s music too!

FAV E E P I S O D E Kids will get the rhyming bug from “Poetree & The Panda Problem.”

Ages 4 to 8

Good Night Stories for Rebel Girls Notable women narrate the podcast of this book series about female role models.

FAV E E P I S O D E Scientist Emily Calandrelli (producer and host of Emily’s Wonder Lab on Netflix) introduces listeners to Mae Jemison, “the girl who dreamed of flying through the stars” and became the first Black woman to travel in space. Ages 8+

R AISING THE FUTURE BOOK CLUB

What childhood book made you a reader and a writer? Shel Silverstein’s

The Missing Piece has stuck with me.

It’s minimalistic but beautiful, funny, and sad, and it carries a message that being independent and on your own is worthwhile and fulfilling while it still celebrates a search for togetherness.

I love it so much.

Milano’s storytime regulars

A TEEN WHEELCHAIR USER TAKES CENTER STAGE The first actor in a wheelchair to win a Tony Award, Ali Stroker writes about a musical-theater kid much like herself in the novel The Chance to Fly. Nat Beacon, the 13-year-old main character, is cast in a local production of Wicked, but not everyone is cool about her getting the part. Stroker will read the first chapter and take questions on @Parents Instagram Live on April 17 at 2 p.m. (EST). For more details, visit parents.com/BookClub. Ages 8 to 12

ALYSSA MILANO: DIRK FRANKE. ALI STROKER: BRIGITTE JOUXTEL. BOOKS: COURTESY OF THE PUBLISHERS.

BOOK CRUSH

Kids and well-known authors collab on original short stories, read aloud by the author. A creative workbook ($25) offers bonus content for all episodes.

FAV E E P I S O D E Jason Reynolds, coauthor of Stamped, pairs up with a middleschooler on a tale about an earthworm that turns into a human. Ages 6 to 12

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K I D SÑD i n n e r

Starring ...Vegetables!

These delicious dinner ideas don’t sneak in the healthy stuff— they put it center stage. recipes by A L A N A C H E R N I L A / photographs by J E N N I F E R C A U S E Y

Spring Vegetable Pie With Dill Biscuits This steamy, biscuittopped celebration of spring vegetables is like chicken potpie minus the chicken, and it’s satisfying in every way. For recipe, see page 52.

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Spinach Polenta With Eggs Tips to win over any veggie skeptic: Spinach and cheese is a comforting combo, and roasted tomatoes are naturally sweet. For recipe, see page 52.

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Broccoli Mac ’n’ Cheese Active Time 20 minutes Total Time 1 hour Makes 6 servings

I N G R E DI E N T S 3 Tbs. unsalted butter, plus more for the dish 1/2 tsp. kosher salt, plus more for the pasta water 8 oz. penne pasta 2 broccoli crowns (about 1 lb.), cut into bite-size pieces 3 Tbs. all-purpose flour 2 cups whole milk 1/2 tsp. paprika 1/2 tsp. dry mustard 1/4 tsp. black pepper 2 cups cheddar cheese, grated (8 oz.), divided MAKE IT

1. Preheat oven to 350°F. Butter a 10-in. square baking dish. Bring a large pot of salted water to a boil.

3. While pasta cooks, melt butter in a medium saucepan over medium heat. Whisk in flour to make a thin paste. Continue to cook, whisking constantly, until paste darkens in color and smells nutty, about 3 minutes. Gradually add milk, whisking to incorporate.

Raise heat to medium-high, and cook, stirring often to prevent scorching, until sauce thickens, 3 to 5 minutes. Stir in paprika, mustard, salt, and pepper.

Add twice as much broccoli as pasta and you may expect an uprising. But thanks to melty cheddar goodness, your fam will gobble up every bite.

4. Add 11/2 cups of the cheese to pasta-broccoli mixture. Fold in sauce, stirring gently to coat.

Transfer mixture to prepared baking dish, and top with remaining 1/2 cup cheese. Bake uncovered until cheese fully melts and mixture bubbles around edges, about 30 minutes. Let stand 10 minutes before serving.

NUTRITION PER SERVING 436 calories;

19g protein; 22g fat (13g sat. fat); 41g carbs; 4g fiber; 7g sugar; 2mg iron; 399mg calcium; 468mg sodium PA R E N T S

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FOOD STYLING BY RISHON HANNERS. PROP STYLING BY AUDREY DAVIS.

2. Add pasta to boiling water and cook according to package directions until al dente, adding broccoli for last 1 minute of cook time. Drain pasta and broccoli in a colander; return to pot.

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*Germs that cause bad breath and early gum disease. Use as directed. ©Johnson & Johnson Consumer Inc. 2021

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As fun to say as it is to eat, gado gado means “mix mix” in Indonesian—fitting, since the platter offers up a bunch of veggies for nibbling.

All those colors in ROYGBIV order (or close to it!) just may entice your picky eaters at home.

Rainbow Gado Gado Active Time 45 minutes Total Time 45 minutes Makes 4 servings

1 14-oz. pkg. extra-firm tofu, drained and cut into 2-in. pieces 1 tsp. lower-sodium soy sauce Kosher salt, for cooking veggies

I N G R E DI E N T S For the dressing: 1/2 cup creamy peanut butter 1/4 cup water 3 Tbs. seasoned rice vinegar 2 Tbs. lower-sodium soy sauce 2 Tbs. fresh lime juice 1 Tbs. toasted sesame oil 1 Tbs. granulated sugar 1 garlic clove, sliced 1 1-in. unpeeled piece fresh ginger, sliced

MAKE IT

For the salad: 1 lb. small red potatoes 2 Tbs. grapeseed oil, sunflower oil, or other neutral oil

1. Prepare the dressing: Process all dressing ingredients in a blender until smooth, about 30 seconds. Set aside.

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8 oz. green beans 8 oz. fresh asparagus, woody ends snapped off 2 carrots, peeled, quartered lengthwise, cut into 2-in. pieces 2 cups coarsely chopped purple cabbage 1 cucumber, quartered lengthwise, cut into 2-in. pieces Lime wedges, for serving

2. Prepare the salad: Place potatoes in a medium saucepan; cover with water by 2 in. Cover saucepan and bring to a boil over medium-high heat. Reduce heat to medium, and cook until potatoes are tender, 15 to 20 minutes.

Drain and let cool for 5 minutes.

Slice potatoes in half.

3. While potatoes cook, heat grapeseed oil in a skillet over medium-high. Add tofu, and cook, stirring often, until browned, 6 to 8 minutes. Add soy sauce, and continue to cook, stirring often, until tofu absorbs soy sauce and crisps up, 1 to 2 minutes. Remove from heat.

4. Once potatoes are finished cooking, fill the same saucepan

with generously salted water and bring to a boil over mediumhigh heat. Add green beans, asparagus, and carrots; cook until just tender, about 2 minutes. Use tongs or a skimmer to transfer vegetables to a colander, leaving water in the saucepan. Add cabbage to water; cook until tender, 3 to 4 minutes. Transfer to a colander and drain.

5. Arrange cooked vegetables, cucumber, and tofu by color on a platter. Serve with lime wedges and peanut dressing.

NUTRITION PER SERVING

561 calories; 24g protein; 32g fat (5g sat. fat); 50g carbs; 9g fiber; 17g sugar; 5mg iron; 157mg calcium; 696mg sodium

K I D SÑD i n n e r

until mixture is softened but not cooked through, about 10 minutes. Add fennel and salt, and continue to cook until fennel has softened slightly, about 3 minutes. Add artichoke hearts, asparagus, peas, parsley, tarragon, and several grinds of fresh pepper. Cook just until asparagus is bright green, about 2 minutes. Remove from heat.

FRO M PAG E 4 6

Spring Vegetable Pie With Dill Biscuits Active Time 20 minutes Total Time 45 minutes Makes 6 servings

I N G R E DI E N T S For the filling: 2 Tbs. olive oil 2 cups chopped leeks (white and pale-green parts only, from 1 or 2 leeks) 1 cup diced carrots (from 2 carrots) 1/2 cup chopped celery (from 2 stalks) 2 cups coarsely chopped fennel bulb (from 1 bulb) 1/2 tsp. kosher salt 1 14-oz. can quartered artichoke hearts in water, drained 1 bunch asparagus (about 1 lb.), woody ends snapped off, cut diagonally into 1-in. pieces (2 cups cut) 1 10-oz. pkg. frozen green peas (do not thaw) 1/2 cup chopped fresh flat-leaf parsley 1 Tbs. chopped fresh tarragon Freshly ground black pepper 3 Tbs. unsalted butter 3 Tbs. all-purpose flour 3 cups lower-sodium vegetable broth For the biscuits: 11/2 cups all-purpose flour 2 tsp. baking powder 1/4 tsp. kosher salt, plus more for sprinkling 6 Tbs. unsalted butter, cut into small pieces 2 Tbs. chopped fresh dill 3/4 cup buttermilk 1 large egg

2. Melt butter in a medium saucepan over medium heat.

Whisk in flour to make a thin paste. Continue to cook, whisking constantly, until paste darkens in color and smells nutty, about 3 minutes.

Gradually add broth, whisking to incorporate. Increase heat to medium-high, and cook, stirring often to prevent scorching, until sauce thickens, 3 to 5 minutes. Pour sauce over vegetables in skillet.

3. Prepare the biscuits: Whisk together flour, baking powder, and salt in a medium bowl.

Add butter and rub it into the flour with your fingers until mixture resembles crumbs.

Gently stir in dill.

4. Vigorously stir together buttermilk and egg in a small bowl. Stir buttermilk mixture into flour mixture with a few swift strokes until there are no dry pockets in the bowl. The dough will be loose and sticky.

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NUTRITION PER SERVING

490 calories; 14g protein; 24g fat (12g sat. fat); 56g carbs; 9g fiber; 10g sugar; 6mg iron; 345mg calcium; 859mg sodium FRO M PAG E 47

Spinach Polenta With Eggs Active Time 40 minutes Total Time 40 minutes Makes 4 servings

I N G R E DI E N T S 2 pts. cherry or grape tomatoes, halved lengthwise 11/4 tsp. kosher salt, divided 4 Tbs. olive oil, divided 6 cups water 11/2 cups polenta 2 oz. goat cheese, crumbled (1/2 cup) 5 oz. fresh baby spinach, roughly chopped (3 cups) 1/4 tsp. black pepper, plus more to taste 4 large eggs MAKE IT

1. Preheat oven to 375°F. Line a rimmed baking sheet with

parchment paper. Arrange tomatoes on the baking sheet, cut side up. Sprinkle with 1/4 tsp. salt, and drizzle with 2 Tbs. oil. Roast until tomatoes begin to collapse, 35 to 40 minutes.

2. While tomatoes cook, bring water and 3/4 tsp. salt to a boil in a saucepan over high heat.

Whisk in polenta. Cover pan, reduce heat to medium-low, and cook, stirring often, until polenta loses its graininess, about 30 minutes. Stir in cheese.

Fold in spinach in batches, allowing each batch to begin to wilt before adding the next batch. Continue to cook until spinach is fully cooked, 3 to 5 minutes total. Season with pepper to taste.

3. Heat remaining 2 Tbs. oil in a skillet over medium.

Crack eggs into skillet, and sprinkle with 1/4 tsp. pepper and remaining 1/4 tsp. salt.

Cover and cook until eggs reach desired doneness, 2 to 4 minutes.

4. Divide polenta mixture among four bowls. Top each serving with 1 egg and about 1/4 cup roasted tomatoes.

NUTRITION PER SERVING

504 calories; 17g protein; 22g fat (6g sat. fat); 62g carbs; 9g fiber; 4g sugar; 4mg iron; 99mg calcium; 772mg sodium

S PA R K S O M E V E G G I E LOV E Here are a few surefire ways to get kids into greens and more.

1

Follow their lead.

Whether you’re at the supermarket or the farmers’ market, let kids check out the produce, ask them for their input, and even act on it.

Try, “What looks good? Should we get that and turn it into dinner?”

MAKE IT

1. Prepare the filling: Preheat oven to 450°F. Heat oil in a 12-in. ovenproof skillet over medium. Add leeks, carrots, and celery, and cook, stirring often,

5. Using wet hands or a large spoon, scoop dough into 6 mounds that you place on top of vegetable mixture in skillet.

Sprinkle biscuits with a pinch of salt. Bake until biscuits are brown and cooked all the way through, when a toothpick comes out clean, about 22 minutes

2

Cute things up.

Sometimes a fun presentation

is all it takes to encourage a kid to get on board the cucumber (or bell pepper) train.

Line up vegetable slices to form a caterpillar, arrange salad ingredients in rainbow order, or present sugar snap peas in a cool cup.

3

Ixnay on the health benefits.

That’s an instant buzzkill for kids.

Instead, talk up how carrots are so

sweet that bunnies are obsessed with them or even how they have a crazy-loud crunch when you bite them—anything but about vitamins.

4

Model good veggie vibes only.

So often we might say things like, “I should really have a salad for lunch,” as if greens are a punishment. Your kids are picking up on what you are

putting down, so talk up those arugula leaves.

5

No need to get uptight about it.

Offer veggies at the table, but don’t make a big deal if kids refuse—that will only fuel their resistance further. After all, many kids have lived on buttered noodles for years, only to grow up into adults who adore brussels sprouts.

K I D S Ñ Pe t s

Animal House!

Monroe, 5, shines a spotlight on her fabulously fluffy cat, Abe, 8. photograph by P R I S C I L L A G R A G G

1

“ H E ’ S P R E T T Y H E A V Y. B U T I H AV E

2

STRONG MUSCLES, SO

He once modeled for a cat calendar.

He was Mr. July!

I C A N C A R R Y H I M .”

4

Abe does love to chase a laser dot, but not after dinner. He is lazy after dinner.

5

He sometimes sleeps with his eyes open.

He must be watching me.

3

He doesn’t like to read.

I’ve tried it with him.

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WARDROBE STYLING BY JILL ROTHSTEIN FOR THE WALL GROUP. HAIRSTYLING BY CLELIA BERGONZOLI FOR UTOPIA. GROOMING BY THORA FOR WALTER SCHUPFER. PROP STYLING BY JOJO LI FOR HELLO ARTISTS. CHILD WRANGLING BY KAYSH SHINN. ON MONROE: JACKET AND JEANS, PIUPIUCHICK. SHOES, MOMINO FROM LADIDA.COM. CURTAIN, QUIET TOWN.

We brush Abe’s long hair twice a week to keep it under control, but it still gets all over my clothes.

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T E N D T O Y OU R S E L F, B O D Y A N D S OU L GREENING THE MEDICINE CABINET? W E ’ R E H E R E F O R I T.

Cheek tint, hair mask, deodorant: Clean options can now cover you from head to toe.

CATHERINE SERVEL/TRUNK ARCHIVE.

Natural Beauty Stars An easy way to do yourself and the planet a favor?

Upgrade your routine with a few plantbased, sustainable products. We asked four beauty-obsessed moms for the latest and greatest clean offerings to smooth skin, shine up hair, make cheekbones pop, and more.

by S H A N N O N M . B AU E R PA R E N T S

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YO U Ñ B e aut y

“Mom life means my skin-care routine is the time I get to be by myself. I prioritize using my Follain Firming Serum, which has bakuchiol, a natural retinol alternative, and niacinamide to target fine lines.” $38; follain.com

“Best-seller Innersense Organic Beauty Hydrating Hair Masque is full of luxe oils like tamanu and monoi, and free of silicones and synthetic fragrances.” $30; follain.com

Shani Darden @shanidarden

“The Honest Beauty Extreme Length Mascara + Primer is by far the best I have ever tried. It makes my lashes long and full but still keeps them looking natural.” $17; drugstores

Tara Foley @tcofoley

Founder of clean-beauty retailer Follain and mom of two, Foley is working to make the world of green beauty more understood and accessible. Her top tip: “Rather than completely overhauling your routine, switch one product at a time as they run out.”

“The most important thing you can do for your skin: sunscreen.

I love Supergoop! Play Everyday Lotion SPF 50 With Sunflower Extract because it’s hydrating yet doesn’t clog my pores.” $22; sephora.com

“Vitamin C and pineapple extract in Garnier Green Labs Pinea-C Brightening Serum Cream help even out skin tone.

The formula also has an SPF of 30 and biodegradable packaging, and it’s dye- and paraben-free.” $22; drugstores

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“Ilia Super Serum Skin Tint SPF 40 is a must-have: It provides mineral sunscreen and a hint of coverage, with no silicones, oil, fragrance, or dyes.” $46; follain.com

“My Shani Darden Cleansing Serum has a low lather, so it cleanses deeply without leaving skin dry or tight. It also contains oat-bran extract to bolster the skin barrier and hyaluronic acid to plump it up.” $38; shanidarden.com

“The 100 percent natural Saie Tinted Dew Balm leaves a rose-gold sheen on my cheekbones that looks really beautiful, even on minimal makeup days. Plus, the tube is made of sugarcane.” $18; follain.com

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YO U Ñ B e aut y

“Before I apply my signature red lip, I scrub off dead skin and create a smooth surface with the plant-based, food-grade Bite Beauty Agave+ Weekly Vegan Lip Scrub.” $24; sephora.com

“When I have time at night, I double cleanse. First, I apply a cleansing oil to my dry skin and wipe it off, then I wash with this sulfate-free Glow Recipe Blueberry Bounce Gentle Cleanser.” $34; sephora.com

Kate Sandoval Box @updatekate

As Parents’ beauty director, Sandoval Box’s job is to test products. “The ones that stand out work really well, contain proven ingredients, and strive to protect our planet,” she says. “All four of these have been in my rotation for months.”

Kahlana Barf ield Brown BARFIELD BROWN: NYKI ELLE. SANDOVAL BOX: DAVIS FACTOR. PRODUCTS: COURTESY OF THE BRANDS.

@kahlanabarfield

Scroll through the fierceness that is her Instagram feed and you can see how Barfield Brown, a mom of two, has built a community of fellow beauty fanatics.

“To me, great clean-beauty products embrace effective natural ingredients,” she says.

“If you have acne, try Kinship Self Reflect Probiotic Moisturizing Sunscreen, a reef-safe SPF 32 mineral that contains a probiotic to clear and soothe skin.

It’s so easy to blend too.” $25; ulta.com

“My strands are noticeably less damaged thanks to vegan, plantpowered Aveda Botanical Repair Strengthening Leave-In Treatment, which comes in recycled packaging.” $37; aveda.com

“Milk Makeup Hydro Grip Primer keeps my foundation in place without causing it to get dry or cakey. It’s superlong-wearing, vegan, and parabenfree.” $30; milkmakeup.com

“I love supporting Black-owned businesses! Organic Bath Co. Zesty Morning Organic Body Butter contains orange, lemon, and grapefruit essential oils that have the most gentle scent and leave my skin feeling so nice.” $29; organicbath.co

“The aloe in Herbal Essences Eucalyptus + Potent Aloe Sulfate Free Shampoo is sustainably sourced in Mexico and makes my hair silky and manageable.” $6; drugstores “Look at the iPhonelevel sleekness of this Dove 0% Aluminum Refillable Deodorant.

I plan to refill mine with Dove’s moisturizing formula for life.” $15; drugstores

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YO U Ñ C o v e r S t o r y

KATHERINE HEIGL

FINDS HER HAPPY PLACE The actor and her husband, Josh, are raising their three kids on a Utah ranch where they can foster dogs, keep horses and chickens, and live far from the spotlight (and down the road from Heigl’s mom). It’s here, miles from Hollywood, that they’re inspiring their kids to be kind, compassionate, and grounded.

by C AT H E R I N E H O N G / photographs by M A R K W I L L I A M S + S A R A H I R A K AWA

K AT H E R I N E H E I G L

has met hundreds of fans over the years, but there’s one exchange, she says, that surpassed them all. It was about four years ago, not long after the actor had given birth to her youngest child, Joshua. Heigl was out doing errands near her home in Utah when she was approached by a teen girl.

“Oh my God, hi,” said the girl, blushing.

“Do you know the show Grey’s Anatomy?”

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The actor smiled and responded that yes, she did.

“Do you know the character Izzie Stevens?” asked the girl, hardly containing her excitement.

Heigl—who won an Emmy in 2007 for her portrayal of the beautiful young surgeon—nodded again and prepared for that inevitable moment of shriekpunctuated celeb recognition.

“Are you her mother?”

As Heigl shares this story over Zoom, she laughs so long and hard that she has to wipe tears from her eyes. The horrifying (yet hilarious) moment of hearing she looked old enough to be her own mother isn’t something most actors would readily reveal. But Heigl, one of the biggest rom-com stars of the aughts, has a willingness to laugh at herself that

Group huddle on the couch!

From left: Adalaide holding rescue cat Checkers, Josh, Naleigh, Joshua, and Katherine, plus Sarge, who was saved from an abandoned puppy mill.

YO U Ñ C o v e r S t o r y

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Before we get into your experience as a parent, I’m dying to ask you about your own mom, Nancy. She’s been your manager since you were a teenager, and you call her your mentor and also your best friend.

What’s your secret?

Well, it wasn’t always like this. When I was a kid I was pretty terrified of her.

But I was a very good girl, and I followed the rules as a kid. I never snuck out, I never drank. Later, in my 20s, we started clashing, and that’s when I realized that

now, which blows my mind. But one task she will not do is babysit. She loves the kids, but that is not her thing. She says, “Don’t call me to take care of your children unless the first words out of your mouth are, ‘Help, I’m bleeding.’ ” Your three kids are at such distinct stages. Naleigh, your oldest, is a tween. How is she doing?

She’s only one of two kids in her grade who doesn’t have their own phone.

So she’s been sneaking my iPad and creating TikTok videos without my permission.

I know she thinks I’m being a tyrant, but I worry about the effect of social media on kids her age. I watched The Social Dilemma. So I’m like, “Go ahead and hate me. I’m trying to save you!”

Of your three children, I’ve heard your middle child, Adalaide, is the one who loves riding the most.

Yeah, thank God somebody on this whole horse ranch does. She’s my pistol, all piss and vinegar. She is fearless.

She actually wants to start barrel racing [a rodeo event where horseback riders compete to weave through barrels at top speed]. And she loves to make Naleigh laugh.

if we were going to keep working together, our relationship had to shift.

It evolved into what I would call a respectful friendship. I always knew that my mother clearly adored me, clearly supported me, and would do anything for me.

And what about your youngest, Joshua?

Right now he’s obsessed with Spider-Man and the Hulk.

Before that, it was John Deere tractors, cement trucks, and dinosaurs. He’s a clichéd study in boyness, I guess.

Our nickname for him is Stinkews.

My mother has told me on more than one occasion that he’s totally spoiled. Not wrong. I’m working on it.

It says a lot that you choose to live so close to each other.

Yeah, she’s just five minutes down the road. We speak twice a day. We get our nails done together, we go to the grocery store together. Sometimes we have lunch or coffee or cocktails together. She’s 77

It must have been a relief when you found out you were having a boy, just for the fact that it might dampen the sense of competition with his sisters.

Yes, I was so relieved. It was actually a big reason why I was vacillating between

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makes it impossible not to fall for her, even over a webcam at a distance of more than 2,000 miles.

Just like almost everyone else in the nation, the 42-year-old married mother of three has been hunkered down at home since the pandemic hit. Her very lively household includes her musician husband of 13 years, Josh Kelley (his latest album, My Baby & the Band, dropped last year), 12-year-old daughter, Naleigh, 8-year-old daughter, Adalaide, 4-year-old son, Joshua, five dogs (Bubba, Flora, Tambor, Sarge, and Poppy), and three cats (Checkers, Coco, and Mr. Woo), all rescues. Heigl’s actual mother and producing partner, Nancy, has a house on the family’s sprawling ranch, where they keep horses, donkeys, goats, and chickens.

The ranch also includes Heigl Hounds of Hope, an adoption center for vulnerable dogs rescued from high-kill shelters. It’s one of many animal-welfare initiatives supported by the Jason Debus Heigl Foundation, a nonprofit that Heigl and her mother established in 2008 to honor Katherine’s late brother, Jason, who was also a passionate animal lover.

“Animals are so much easier than children,” Heigl says.

“Far fewer demands!” Instead of being on the road right now promoting her latest project, the Netflix drama Firefly Lane (based on the best-selling novel by Kristin Hannah), Heigl has been doing laundry, battling tweenage Naleigh over cell-phone privileges, and spending an estimated two hours every day picking up “apple cores, wrappers, and other stuff left on the floor and on the tables and on the sofas.” And while she acknowledges her privilege in being able to quarantine in comfort, she voices the same fatigue afflicting so many parents. “This is the longest period I have consistently spent with my children,” she says. “At first I loved cooking inspired meals, but now I’m like, ‘Kids, just make yourself a sandwich.’ ”

Production of the friendship tale Firefly Lane, now on Netflix, wrapped a year ago, just before lockdown. Heigl stars in it with Sarah Chalke and is also one of the executive producers.

YO U Ñ C o v e r S t o r y

Another aspect of their upbringing has to be growing up with parents who are both in the public eye. How do you think it’s affected them?

The other day, Adalaide came home from school and acted out what she heard from her friends. Like, “Omigosh, your dad’s music! Your mom’s movies!” She’s like, yeah, I know.

My parents are famous, I got it.

And for Naleigh, I think it’s a little bit embarrassing. But the nice thing is that we’ve been a part of this community for 12 years, and our kids get to see us live just like everybody else, away from the hoopla and the paparazzi.

trying to get pregnant or adopting again, since with adoption you can specify the sex. I just thought, another girl could mean lifelong therapy for all of us.

You’ve often spoken about how you always knew you wanted to adopt a child, in large part because your parents adopted your older sister, Meg, from South Korea. So you and Josh adopted Naleigh from South Korea when she was 9 months old, and then adopted Adalaide at birth here in the U.S. Now that your girls are 8 and 12, am I right that they probably have deeper questions about their birth stories than they had when they were little?

They do have more questions as they get older. We have said to them, this is your story. We don’t have any information about your biological fathers, but we do have a bit about your biological mothers. If you guys want to talk more about them, you can have as much or as little information as you want. Tell us what you’re comfortable with knowing.

Parents’ Lightning Round HOW WE CHOOSE NAMES FOR OUR RESCUE PETS

Your kids are lucky to be growing up in a household surrounded by so many animals.

Caring for animals is a great way to teach children compassion, kindness, loyalty, and responsibility. I think dogs, especially, are the perfect companions.

All they live for is to love you and to be loved in return. It’s so heartbreaking to see a dog who’s been abandoned.

Old dogs, especially, are my thing.

Divine inspiration!

You’ve spoken openly about your own recent growth of understanding about having white privilege, or as you put it, living in your “white bubble.”

Because I was raised with adoption, looking beyond skin color was the norm for me, and I just believed that love is love—it doesn’t matter what we look like. But then when I asked my sister, Meg, if she had been treated one way when she was out in public with our parents and a different way when she was out by herself without them, she said, “Oh yeah, all the time!” That made me realize that I had been so naïve.

At first, I got very angry. But I had to calm down and realize, okay, this isn’t about how it makes me feel. It’s about how I need to protect my daughters and prepare them for the world, because I can’t change society in one fell swoop.

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THE KIDS CARE FOR O U R P E T S B Y . . .

Helping to feed them every morning and give them fresh water twice a day.

ZANIEST PETS WE’VE EVER HAD

Ferrets E A S I E S T WAY T O M A K E M Y KIDS L AUG H

Tickle them, plus Josh’s dad puns always get Naleigh to giggle L E A S T FAVO R I T E PA R E N T I N G TA S K

Disciplining M O S T FAVO R I T E PA R E N T I N G TA S K

Nighttime cuddles and check-ins S H O W W E WAT C H TOGETHER

The Baby-Sitters Club on Netflix

Have you guys thought at all about adding one more child to your family?

Before the pandemic, I thought that we needed one more child to complete this home. I wasn’t sure if we would go the foster-care route or adoption or maybe another pregnancy. But now I have completely changed my mind. I am very content with my three!

After the first few months on lockdown with their kids, I think a lot of parents probably came to the same conclusion.

Yeah, but you know, I could see myself fostering one more dog. There’s one sweet old girl now at the shelter named Olive who was used for breeding and then abandoned. I’d love to let her live out her last couple of years here on a soft bed. I just have to convince Josh.

A DV E RT I S E M E N T

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YO U Ñ B a l a n c e

New Column!

Welcome to My World Being a working mom means wearing many hats: caretaker, career woman, chef, cleanup crew. On this page, we’ll track a day in the life of a parent balancing life and work—starting with Kindra Hanson-Okafor, mom of two and a small-business co-owner. as told to K AT I E A R N O L D - R AT L I F F

I CA M E T O New York to work as a model.

6:45–7 a . m .

I get Amara and we all go to the park. While they play, I’ll answer gym emails, order cleaning supplies—but often I just relax. Multitasking doesn’t work for me. I’m a Virgo, I love a list. But now I’m like, screw the list. Nobody’s going to die if I don’t get this email out.

N OON

KINDRA HANSON- OKAFOR Age 38, mom of Chioma, 5, and Amara, 20 months; wife of Ngo, 46; Co-owner, Iconoclast Fitness, New York, NY; iconoclastfitness.com

Amara and Chioma wake up, eat breakfast. This is often the only time Ngo gets with them, so I hang back. Which is hard, because Amara is a clinger—she has serious separation anxiety from me. If I want “alone time,” I have to set her up with some crackers and run to the next room.

Distance learning and baby watching: a perpetual juggle

8 a.m.

Ngo goes to our gym. It’s like WeWork for trainers—they rent the space from us to see clients, and Ngo also sees clients there. He’s at the gym from 8 a.m. to 6 p.m. on weekdays, 8 a.m. to 3 p.m. on weekends. Honestly, it’s hard. We never get a break, no ma’am. He’s all in at the gym, I’m all in at home. I also do the billing and scheduling, which I try to squeeze in during the day. (Try is the operative word.)

9:30 a . m .

Chioma, a kindergartner, has his first class, before he goes on “brain break”: He’ll grab a toy, play on the iPad, watch Netflix. (Anything with dinosaurs!)

I finally eat breakfast or hop onto the Peloton. It’s sweat therapy for me, and it’s the one thing I make sure I do.

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Lunch! I meal prep so at lunch I can just heat stuff up. They’re not cheffy meals—we’re talking hot dogs, meatloaf. Amara is picky, so if she wants an ice-pop and puffs, that’s fine by me.

2 p. m .

Chioma has another lesson, and Amara takes a nap. (A real one this time.) I do client intake, social media, and website inquiries. I’ll Zoom with a client, and it’s chaos: Chi barging in, me doing hand signals to say, “Get out … “ It’s a lot.

I get Amara out of her crib, and the three of us run errands: Target, Trader Joe’s, the pizza place. Sometimes we just need to get out of the house.

6 p. m .–8 p. m .

Ngo comes home. We eat dinner, put Amara to bed. Finally, I have help! We have no family nearby, and the days are long. In the height of quarantine, I really leaned on Chioma. It was like, “Okay, you grab her stuffed animal, I’ll use the bathroom, and we’ll meet in the living room—go!” Thank God he knows where his granola bars are and can wipe his own butt.

Time for Amara’s “nap,” which she rarely takes. I put her in the crib and let her and her stuffies sort it out.

My friend Sarah arrives. She has a 7-year-old son she’s home with, so we’re mom tribing it two days a week. It’s been so nice. I get to talk about something other than Daniel Tiger, and she never asks me for snacks. We had a nanny before the pandemic, but she has a son at home too.

1 p. m .

4 p. m .

9 a.m.

9:15 a . m .

Chioma has his next session.

Amara clings to my leg, literally. It drives me nuts. I walk around the apartment with a hand on her back, dragging her. I’m sweating even talking about it.

Amara at the park doubles as email catch-up time.

9 p. m .–11 p. m .

Ngo takes Chioma to the gym some days.

Chioma goes down for the night. Ngo and I live for these hours. We’re still figuring out how to stay connected amid all this time crunch. We text during the day, and in the evening we watch an episode of something—lately, Curb Your Enthusiasm—and unwind. (A little tequila helps.) For a while, I’d tackle unfinished work before bed, but it made me bitter—I’m not staying up until the wee hours making sure we have enough treadmill lube. I want to be with my husband. It’s never enough time, but we do what we can.

COURTESY OF THE SUBJECT.

I had great success but knew I needed a steadier income. I chose the fitness industry as my next direction, and I spent more than 12 years running a top gym.

My husband, Ngo, is a two-time Golden Gloves boxing champ and a trainer, so having our own gym made sense. We opened Iconoclast Fitness in 2018, and I’m proud to be a Black female business owner. I’m someone who’s drunk in love with her kids—and also tired as hell.

But mothering begins with mothering yourself, so I try to give myself grace.

11 a . m .

new!

Even when all your garbage is all gross. New Glad® with Clorox bags TM

eliminate food and bacterial odors to keep all your trash all under control.

This product is bleach-free.

LIFE.

ENJOY THE JOURNEY TOGETHER TIME TO FIND ALLLL THE EGGS.

TRUNK ARCHIVE.

Let’s Hatch Some Fun Up in Here!

Even if a few beloved events—the town egg roll and the festive parade—may be tricky to pull off this Easter, there are plenty of ways to get the bunny-loving, pastel-perfect good times going for your kids. From egg art to cool games, here are 20 ideas to keep those little rabbits hoppy, er, happy.

by M E GA N B R A D E N - P E R RY

Get a peep at the best basket fillers on page 79.

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L I F E ÑTo ge t h e r T i m e

Craft Some Epic Eggs!

2

Stamp With Fingerprints Dye eggs a pale base color to start. Then have your kid lightly press their fingertip onto a nontoxic ink pad and roll their finger on the eggshell to create dots. You can layer colors of fingerprints for a confetti-like look (just remember to let the ink dry).

When it comes to Easter eggs, spotty coverage is a very good thing (zing!).

Try Color Blocking Have your kid submerge a portion of each egg in a fairly concentrated dye of any shade and hold it super-still for a few seconds. Let dry, then repeat using a different portion of the shell and a new color of dye. Experiment with different combos, overlapping portions of the egg and also leaving some parts of the shell free from dye. Let dry after adding each new layer of color, then voilà—egg pop art.

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TARA DONNE. CRAFTS BY SARAH CAVE.

1

Farmer-Owned.

They’re more than just words on our packaging. Our farmer-owners are everything to us. And being farmer-owned is just the start.

We’re Farmer-Built. Our foundation is strong. Our purpose is clear.

We care for our animals and land as we make dairy products people love.

We’re Farmer-Inspired. Our farmer-owners’ work ethic drives us, and their enduring optimism fuels us.

We’re Farmer-United. As a co-op, we know the power of working together. Sharing. And each of us doing what’s best for all.

Our more than 1,700 farmers don’t just own the company — they make everything we do better.

All Together Better ®

Meet some of our farmer-owners at www.landolakes.com/our-farmers

© 2021 Land O’Lakes, Inc. LAND O LAKES, the LAND O LAKES logo, and ALL TOGETHER BETTER are trademarks of Land O’Lakes, Inc.

L I F E ÑTo ge t h e r T i m e

MADE TO

HELP FILL

YOU UP

3

Go Wild With Watercolor Dampen a boiled egg under water, then let your kid apply washable watercolor paint to the wet shell using a small brush so that the colors bleed slightly on the damp surface. If you’d like the design to spread out more, lightly brush on more water. Set the egg’s color by using a hair dryer on the lowest setting; move the dryer in small circles and hold it at least 6 inches from the egg for about ten seconds.

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10 LAYERS

4

OF WHEAT

Get Graphic With Tape

IN EVERY BITE

Help your kid snip rectangles, squares, and triangles from strips of electrical tape and stick them to the shells.

Dye the eggs and, once they are fully dry, remove the tape to do a big reveal of the cool geometric designs.

You can remove that vinegar smell from dying eggs by dipping little fingers in a few teaspoonfuls of lemon juice and water.

Whip Up Some Wonder

OPPOSITE: TARA DONNE. THIS PAGE, FROM TOP: TARA DONNE; TED + CHELSEA CAVANAUGH.

5 D E C K O U T B R E A K FA S T.

Oh, the magic you can create with a mere cookie cutter. All it takes is a rabbit shape to bunny-ify egg-in-thehole. Or you could use a simple oval one to make Easter egg pancakes. Serve them with a spread of sprinkles, fruit, whipped cream, even different jams in squirt bottles so that your kids can decorate them to their heart’s content.

6 GROW A LOLLIPOP GARDEN.

The day before Easter, plant “lollipop seeds” (aka jelly beans) with your kids in the yard or in a flowerpot—a playful ruse Kierste Wade, of the blog Old Salt Farm, does every year with her six kids.

The next morning, she sticks lollipops in the dirt, then shows her kids how they miraculously sprouted overnight.

7

Have your kids wake up to clues that the Easter Bunny paid a visit. Toni Slessinger, mom of three from New Orleans, leaves Easter grass in the hall leading to her FA K E TH E E VI D E N C E .

Chive whiskers are optional, particularly if your kid side-eyes anything green.

kids’ baskets. Sprinkle cotton balls as rabbit fur, or take a bite out of a carrot “accidentally” left out. And any potty humor–obsessed kid will be stoked to discover that a trail of chocolatecovered raisins is “bunny poop.”

L I F E ÑTo ge t h e r T i m e

A CEREAL FOR

CINNAMON

ROLL LOVERS

TO LOVE

Balloons always make it a party!

Blow up a bunch of balloons and, if feeling ambitious, paint them like Easter eggs. Then overstuff a cabinet with them, and watch your kid light up as the pastel avalanche tumbles down when they open the door.

9

Use up dyed eggs with this tapping game, a tradition in many cultures, such as Greek, Cajun, and Polish. Two players each choose an egg, then try to smash their opponent’s shell at the pointed end by knocking the eggs together. Whoever’s egg stays intact wins. Play a family tournament: The last one standing is the champ.

F I G H T FA I R .

10 B E A J E L LY J U D G E .

Hold a blind taste test of Jelly Belly jelly beans, and the one who correctly guesses the most flavors wins. Kinda Andrews, mom of six from Baton Rouge, says, “One year we played the Jelly Belly BeanBoozled game—it might be a great flavor or a doozy. Is it popcorn or rotten egg?”

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11 S M A S H C O N F E T T I E G G S .

“Cascarones keep my kids connected to their Mexican-American heritage,” says children’s book author Jennifer Torres.

“It’s all joy and mischief. There are few opportunities to shower parents with confetti.” Start saving eggshells before Easter. Tap thumb-size holes in raw eggs, pour out the contents, then rinse and dye shells. Fill with paper confetti, and glue tissue paper over the holes. Head outside and go crazy throwing the cascarones at each other.

12 P L AY W I T H C A N D Y.

Have kids use Peeps candy to move as many jelly beans as they can from one pile to another in a minute. The catch: They can’t use fingers to release jelly beans from the Peeps, says Jen Smith, of the blog Grace for Single Parents.

13 P A I R U P.

Little ones can have fun too. Mandisa Watts, of the blog Happy Toddler Playtime, asks her kid to color match eggs to dots she draws on paper.

LUCY SCHAEFFER.

8 I N F L AT E A S U R P R I S E .

APPROVED

Awesome-er Egg Hunts

2021

20

Build the Coolest Basket For Little Kids 14 “ S I M O N S AY S ”:

Slip silly commands, like “Quack like a duck” or “Sing really loud,” inside each plastic egg.

When an egg is found, crack it open and read the message aloud. Let the goofiness ensue.

15 “ C H I C K , C H I C K ,

Play it like “Duck, duck, goose.” When “it” (chasee) escapes the bunny (chaser), they get 30 seconds to hunt for eggs on their own.

B U N N Y ”:

For Older Kids 16 J I G S A W :

BOTTOM LEFT: SOLSTOCK/GETTY IMAGES. RIGHT: COURTESY OF THE BRANDS.

Stuff puzzle pieces inside each plastic egg, suggests Autumn Baldwin, mom of five and blogger at It’s Always Autumn. Once the kids have found all the eggs, there’s puzzle fun to be had.

17 A H O Y :

Draw a treasure map of your yard or house with X’s that mark the spots where the eggs are hidden.

For Mixed Ages 18 H I G H / L O W :

Tell little kids to search for plastic eggs on the ground, while bigger kids look everywhere else.

19 E G G - X A C T M A T C H :

To level the playing field, assign each child a shade to collect. For an added challenge for older kids, Marie LeBaron, a Seattle mom of three who blogs at Make and Takes, mixes up plastic egg halves and has kids search for that specific color combo.

S TA R T W I T H A B O O K

ADD A PLUSH

Amuse your kid by using your thumb and index finger to operate the grown-up’s arms in the Hug Me Little Bunny: Finger Puppet Book. $10; chroniclebooks.com

A new little critter to clutch will really make their morning.

Jellycat’s 12-inch Bashful Bunny is supersoft with floppy, pettable ears. $22.50; jellycat.com

M Y C A R RY I N G CASE IS JUST AS CUTE.

TO S S I N A TOY

Get onboard the happy train! The new DUPLO Unicorn looks adorbs in or out of its box. 18 months+, $10; lego.com

DON’T FORGET

INCLUDE A PROJECT

TH E CAN DY

The layered, sparkly dough is eco-friendly with plant-based dyes and compostable glitter. 3 years+, $15 for 7 ounces; landofdough.com

With both chocolate and jelly beans tucked inside, this filled egg has you covered. See’s Candies Easter Treasure Egg, $16; sees.com

Printable Easter Coloring Pages Simply hover your phone’s camera over the smart code to download them.

L I F EÑ C l e a n i n g

Green Cleaners That Shine

At a time when we’re hanging at home more than ever, a tidy space feels like a big accomplishment. For the second year in a row, we tested eco-friendly formulas to find out which ones get surfaces clean and leave the planet intact too.

Roll out the green carpet for the winners.

by K A R E N C I C E R O

BEST GREEN CLEANERS 2021

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Germ Fighters The EPA has approved several botanical products to kill COVID-19 on surfaces.

They don’t need to be used in conjunction with bleach or other products. But following the directions is crucial: Leave the disinfectant undisturbed for five to ten minutes (depending on the brand) and allow it to air-dry.

Wipe down your surface with soap and water before using a disinfectant.

How We Chose The Winners

OPPOSITE: BJÖRN WALLANDER/OTTO. INTERIOR DESIGN BY REBECCA ROBERTSON. HOME REMODELED BY ARCHITECT JOHN BERG. THIS PAGE: PRODUCTS: JEFFREY WESTBROOK. INTERIOR: GAP PHOTOS/DAVID GILES.

Best Disinfecting Wipes (Tie) There’s an antiviral component in thyme oil (who knew?), and that’s what makes CleanWell Botanical Disinfecting Wipes germ blasters on toys, sinks, doorknobs, and whatever else you’re sanitizing these days.

“The wipes have a good amount of moisture without being too wet,” said one tester, who enjoyed the lemon scent. $4 for 35; thrivemarket.com Citric acid gives germ-fighting oomph to Arm & Hammer Essentials Disinfecting Wipes. Testers noted that they’re thicker and more textured than other brands they’d tried. $5 for 80; supermarkets nationwide

Best Scented Disinfectant

Best Fragrance-Free Disinfectant

The lavender-vanilla Seventh Generation Disinfectant Spray has a slight edge over the fresh citrus. But you do you. What matters is they both contain the herbal-based germ fighter thyme oil—yep, the same active ingredient that’s in the CleanWell wipes. $5.50 for 13.9 oz.; target.com

Quite the multitasker, Honest Disinfecting Spray doesn’t just wipe out invisible germs. Unlike many brands, it contains ingredients that cut through grime so your baby’s high chair is legit spotless. At least for a few minutes. $7 for 32 oz.; honest.com

We started with more than 100 products that are free of ammonia, hydrochloric acid, petroleum, phthalates, and sodium hydroxide (except in small amounts for pH balance)—the five chemical ingredients that Parents advisor Philip Landrigan, M.D., a pediatrician and director of the Global Observatory on Pollution and Health at Boston College, cited as most concerning to the environment. Families rated the products’ effectiveness on kid stains (think bibs and muddy clothes) and routine cleanup (such as washing dishes and disinfecting countertops).

To pick the winners, we also factored in the price and the sustainability of the packaging, a suggestion from Surili Sutaria Patel, director of the Center for Climate, Health, and Equity at the American Public Health Association.

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Kitchen Essentials

Best Liquid Dish Soap Made with several plantderived cleaners, Thrive Market Dish Soap cut through grease on our testers’ pots and pans. They were split on whether they preferred the lavender or the fragrance-free version. $3.50 for 24 oz.; thrivemarket.com

Best for Countertops In an easy-to-spray bottle, Boulder Clean Natural Granite + Stainless Cleaner is the bomb for wiping up baking messes, pet slobber, and sticky fingerprints, keeping counters streak-free. (You can also use it on marble, sealed stone, and chrome.) The company donates 1 percent of its annual sales to nonprofits focused on helping the environment. $7 for 28 oz.; boulderclean.com

Best Dishwasher Pods Standing up to the likes of dried pancake batter and utensils with caked-on mac ’n’ cheese unearthed from a teen’s room, Boulder Clean Dishwasher Detergent Power Packs leave no spots or residue. “Everything dried to a sparkly clean,” raved one tester, who preferred the Citrus Zest scent. The secret sauce: a patented sugar-derived ingredient. $16 for 48 pods; boulderclean.com

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Best Dishwasher Cleaner We’re not judging, but when was the last time you deodorized your dishwasher? Use Lemi Shine’s Dishwasher Cleaner monthly to remove mineral buildup and other gunk while infusing a lemon scent. $7 for a pack of four; target.com

Best Powder Dish Soap A surprise hit: the Blueland Dish Soap Starter Set, with a reusable silicone shaker bottle and a mineral-based powder that foams up when you sprinkle it on a wet sponge or wet dishes. Said one tester: “It cuts through grime on dishes you left in the sink too long.” $20 for the set, starts at $10 for refills; blueland.com

Best Baby-Bottle Soap Dealing with cloudy milk residue inside bottles and sippy cups? The baking soda and the cleaners derived from tree oils and coconut in Dapple Baby Bottle & Dish Soap cut through film from milk or formula. Buy a pump bottle the first time and use pouches for refills. $5 for 16.9 oz., $8 for 34-oz. refills; target.com

PRODUCTS: JEFFREY WESTBROOK. INTERIOR: GAP PHOTOS/COLIN POOLE.

Germs can linger in sneaky spots like your cabinet hardware and appliance handles.

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L I F EÑ C l e a n i n g

Hit the Spot!

A little bit goes a long way.

Testers tried about half a capful per load.

Laundry Essentials Best Laundry Pods Smaller than most pods and filled with clear liquid, the Brandless Laundry Detergent Packs dissolve well in the wash. “They cleaned like a champ, and the lavender version left a great scent,” one mom said. Psst: There’s a fragrance-free option if you need it. In either case, each jar comes with a child-resistant lid and contains 50 pods. $17; brandless.com

F O R M E A LT I M E M E S S E S

“I literally forgot to put soap in the machine—mom life!—while washing my daughter’s high-chair cover, and all the food stains were gone with just the Disney Baby ECOS Stain & Odor Remover that I’d applied.” $8 for two 22-oz. bottles; amazon.com

Best Baby Laundry Detergent Milk stains are no match for Babyganics 3X Lavender Laundry Detergent thanks to a blend of plant-based cleaners and enzymes. Said one tester: “My 6-month-old’s clothes are pretty nasty because she has reflux. This brand removed the stains and odor without irritating her sensitive skin.” $15 for 60 loads; target.com

FOR SPILLS ON THE GO

“Using this little tube of Babyganics Fragrance Free Stain Eraser, I have blotted away pasta sauce, chocolate ice cream, and purple grape juice from my son’s clothes. It lightens the stain as you’re working on it, and the rest comes out in the wash.” $10 for three; amazon.com

With a combo of gentle foaming cleansers—including one made with coconut oil—PUR Home Laundry Detergent removes grungy stains on the first shot. As one tester, who tried the lavender-grapefruit scent, put it, “I usually wash my son’s soccer jersey twice to get out all the dirt. But with this detergent, it didn’t need a second round.” More good stuff: The bottle is made completely of recycled materials; you can even toss the exterior cardboard shell into the compost bin. $13 for 50 loads; shoppurhome.com

Best Fabric Softener The perks of using Mrs. Meyer’s Clean Day Fabric Softener, according to our testers: Just an ounce of the biodegradable liquid removes static, reduces wrinkles, and leaves towels fluffy.

Testers were also impressed by the selection of scents. $9 for 32 oz.; mrsmeyers.com

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Recycled plastic makes up 30-plus percent of the bottle (minus the cap).

F O R S E T- I N S P O T S

“The Kids ‘N’ Pets Instant All-Purpose Stain & Odor Remover got out old mysterious brown stains from my son’s plush blanket while preserving the preprinted design.” Other testers swore by it to clean up accidents from real and furry babies. $5 for 27 oz.; walmart.com

JEFFREY WESTBROOK.

Best Liquid Laundry Detergent

L I F EÑ C l e a n i n g

Bathroom Essentials Does Your Cleaner Kill COVID-19?

Simply hover your phone’s camera over the smart code to check if the product meets EPA standards.

Best Scrub Hailed as a “miracle worker,” Mrs. Meyer’s Clean Day Surface Scrub tackles trouble spots you might think are hopeless.

“This powder did wonders for my bathtub, which had grit and grime on it for a long time,” said one tester. Another raved about how it easily removed dried toothpaste from the sink. $4.50 for 11 oz.; mrsmeyers.com

Best Mop Set

Floor Essentials

PRODUCTS: JEFFREY WESTBROOK. INTERIOR: DAVID TSAY/OTTO; DESIGNED BY ASHLEY GOFORTH.

Best Toilet Bowl Cleaner The citric acid in Method AntiBac Toilet Bowl Cleaner kills germs while the spearmint scent neutralizes the odor. The bottle’s narrow shape is also easy to handle, according to testers. $4 for 28 oz.; target.com

Best Bathroom Cleaner With lime and lavender essential oils, AspenClean Bathroom Cleaner helps you get the job done faster. As one tester mentioned, “It dissolved thick scum in my soap holder.” $9 for 22 oz.; aspenclean.com

Best All-Purpose Floor Cleaner

Best Disinfecting Floor Cleaner

The organic vinegar–based Squeak Floor Me Floor Cleaner loosens dirt on wood, stone, and tile. “My softwood pine floors, entryway tile, and floating cherrywood floors didn’t look particularly dirty, but the water was gross when I was done cleaning,” said one tester, who also noted that the product filled the room with an amazing earthy scent. $14 for 32 oz.; getsqueakywithus.com

Spritz Bona PowerPlus Antibacterial Hard-Surface Floor Cleaner on your germy hot spots, like near the bathroom sink and under the high chair. The hydrogen peroxide kills bacteria without leaving a residue. Shout-out for the nozzle’s dual setting, which makes spot cleaning a potty accident less annoying. $8 for 22 oz.; target.com

Truly a game changer, The Maker’s Mop “feels like it was designed by someone who wanted to make mopping pleasant so you don’t put it off,” one tester said. Features such as a lightweight extendable handle, a U-shaped mop head that gets into hard-to-reach spots, adhesive strips that grip eco-friendly washable pads, and a rubber ring that prevents sliding when you lean it against the wall are about as exciting as it gets these days. $49 for the mop and four washable pads; makersclean.com

Best Spray Mop The Libman Freedom Spray Mop one-ups similar systems because you can pour your own eco-friendly cleaner (rather than a specific solution) into the refillable compartment.

A battery-free trigger and a washable microfiber pad also give it an eco-edge. $21; walmart.com

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L I F EÑD é c o r

Pet-Proof Your Furniture

INVE ST IN TH E RIG HT FAB RIC S

To survive the antics of a terrier, a tabby, or a toddler, durability is key. Choose pillow covers, couches, and upholstered chairs with care. “My living-room sofa is made with Sunbrella’s outdoor fabric. It’s superstain-resistant and still looks beautiful,” says Sabrina Soto, HGTV host and mom of a 5-year-old and a labradoodle.

“You can even find outdoor fabric that mimics linen or leather.” Speaking of, leather (real or faux) is tough, it can be wiped, and it repels hair. Other sturdy picks are solution-dyed acrylic, canvas, and cotton bull denim. (Skip velvet, suede, and loosely woven fabrics.)

Best-in-Show Decorating Tips You can have nice things (fur real!). With a little ingenuity, your home will hold up—and look stylish—no matter what your pet or kids throw at it.

by C AY L I N H A R R I S

Pillows, throws, and curtains can attract fur like crazy.

“Solids show hair more, so try a pattern instead,” Soto says.

If you’re shopping for a new sofa or upholstered chair, you may want to take along a lock of Fido’s fur. It’s a smart idea to choose a tone that’s in the same color family as your pet’s hair so it will blend in between lint rollings—and steer clear of any colors that will make it stand out (think black hair on a tan couch).

G O WAS HAB LE WH E N YOU CAN A regular spin in

the washing machine cuts

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LUCAS OTTONE/STOCKSY.

C O N S ID E R C O LO R

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Create a Kids’ Corner

Discover how to organize and personalize a special activity space for your child to draw, play, read, and more.

See how Command Brand can help it come to life. ™

1

TRY THESE DIY PROJECTS MAKE AN ART WALL

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Put your little artist’s masterpieces on display by clipping them to a piece of baker’s twine with mini clothespins. Then, secure the twine to the wall with Command™ Clear Medium Hooks.

2

3 2

SET UP A CREATION STATION Inspire creativity by keeping art supplies organized and within reach. Hang small buckets above your child’s desk with Command™ Clear Large Hooks and fill them with crafting essentials.

3

BUILD A BOOK NOOK

Encourage recreational reading by curating a cozy area. Mount Command™ Picture Ledges to the wall like floating bookshelves and add comfy seating.

Scan the code with your phone for step-by-step instructions and visit command.com for helpful products that can be applied easily and removed damage-free.

L I F EÑD é c o r

down on stains, odors, and pet-hair buildup. Buy accent pillows with removable covers and throws that aren’t dry-clean only. A slipcover that detaches for a thorough cleaning is also convenient.

(Air-dry or dry on no heat to avoid shrinking.) Or DIY your own to protect against puddles of fur: Drape a boldly patterned sheet or blanket over the furniture and tuck it under the cushions.

PRETTY UP YOUR ANIMAL HOUSE

by C A S S I E H U R W I T Z

technology, indoor-outdoor rugs aren’t that plasticky texture you might expect, and you can pick up a large one for a fraction of the cost of wool. “They’re soft, and you can spill practically anything on them and stains come off with soap and water,” Soto says. Other advancements to check out: stylish, washable cotton rugs by Lorena Canals, Flor carpet tiles that swap out if there’s a stain, and Ruggable rugs (shown on the floor in the photo, below), which include a washable rug cover and a nonslip base.

KE E P PAWS OUT O F PL ANTS

“We learned the hard way after our puppy, Patches, destroyed several plants,” says Shira Gill, organizing expert and author of the upcoming book Minimalista.

“We keep them on higher surfaces like mantles and console tables instead of on the floor.” A plant stand with legs that lifts plants up removes some of the temptation. You can also put smooth stones over the soil to play interference.

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DISH IT OUT

PAM PU R R- I N G

For the pet that likes to play with its food, the Wild One Bowls have silicone bases to ensure they’ll stay steady during even the rowdiest of chow times.

They can be personalized (with emojis too) for $10. $25 each; wildone.com

The Pawsome Couture Calming Pet Bed is like an ultra-cushy beanbag chair. The raised rim is what gives this a cocoon feel, soothing anxious animals right to sleep. $46 and up; pawsomecouture.com

SWEET DREAMS

C AT- S C R AT C H F E V E R

Larger pooches will love the roomy plushness of the Design Dua Bear Dog Bed, while pet parents will adore the fetching basket that’s handwoven by artisans in Ghana. $120 and up; designdua.com

Save your surfaces with the heightadjustable Alpha Paw ScratchyRamp 2.0, designed to groom long claws without tipping. The feline-enticing carpet panel is replaceable once it’s worn out. $160; alphapaw.com

S PAC E SAV E R

DOUBLE DUTY

Store less-than-appealing chew toys and such in these Rivet Modern Tall Geometric Wire Baskets that keep things contained gorgeously. $91 for a set of two; amazon.com

Keep kitty litter on the down-low with the Unipaws Litter Box Enclosure. It masquerades as a bench, an end table, or a nightstand. $150; wayfair.com

FINE DINING

SNEAKY SNACKS

Serve up daily meals on the wipeable Brklz Bon Appetit Food Mat. Protecting your floor has never been cuter. $24; brklz.com

If flashy food packaging is ruining your feng shui, the Waggo Dipped Color Ceramic Dog Treat Jar will neaten things up without sacrificing your interior aesthetic. $38; waggo.com

BOTTOM LEFT: @WAFFLENUGGET FOR RUGGABLE. PAWSOME COUTURE BED: JEFFREY WESTBROOK. ALL OTHER PRODUCTS: COURTESY OF THE BRANDS.

O P T FO R FU N CTIO NAL FLOO RIN G Thanks to fancy fabric

Love them back™ © 2021 MARS OR AFFILIATES.

L I F EÑD é c o r

Organize All the Pet Stuff

water away from foot traffic, such as in the corner of the kitchen or in a laundry room, so your pet can eat in peace. This minimizes clutter, eases your animal’s anxiety, and may protect your kid from getting nipped. “Pets should eat in a safe space. It’s important that children leave them alone when they’re eating,” explains Terri Bright, Ph.D., BCBA-D, certified applied animal behaviorist, and director of behavior services at Angell Animal Medical Center, in Boston. Decant kibble and treats from

bulk bags into glass or ceramic canisters with a tight seal so food is presentable on a shelf and stays fresh, Gill says.

M E D IC IN E C H E ST: Choose a

lidded container with dividers to neatly

store pet meds and first-aid supplies.

“Make sure to toss anything that has expired, and minimize packaging to keep it from feeling cluttered,” Gill says.

“I tuck mine into a utility cabinet out of reach of my kids.”

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FE E D IN G ARE A: Set out food and

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A row of child-height wall hooks in the entryway is a streamlined way to corral collars and leashes. Stash poop baggies, a travel water bowl, and outdoor toys in a hung-up tote bag that kids can grab if they’re taking the pup outside. Hide an old towel in a separate tote or bin for easy cleanup when they return.

G ROO MIN G CAD DY: Store your

pet’s shampoo, brushes, and nail clippers in a portable basket stowed away in a closet or a cabinet that’s convenient to carry to the bathroom, garage, porch, or wherever you use the supplies most frequently.

TOY B IN S: Nice-looking baskets

placed on the ground or on low shelves give pets better access to playthings and make it much easier for kids to pick up after their animals, Gill says.

Either way, “there’s going to be stuff on the floor, so let go of the idea of things being immaculate.”

RETRAIN YOUR PET TO STOP ... ... SHREDDING UP FURNITURE.

... TAKING OVER YOUR BED.

Whether you’re trying to save an existing sofa or protect a new piece, there’s hope. “Focus your cat’s attention on something it should be scratching,” says animal behaviorist Terri Bright, Ph.D. Look for a cat scratcher with a wide base that won’t tip. To attract your kitty to it, shower the pet with praise and treats. If your dog is clawing the couch, call it and ask for a quick down-stay without a reward, says Dr. Bright.

“Don’t redirect it to another activity or you’re rewarding the act.”

Give your pet a new hangout of its own. Lay down a pet bed or mat and lure your dog or cat over to it, Dr. Bright advises. Once the pet is on the bed, reward it with treats.

Remove the pet and then call it back, offering more goodies.

Repeat this process over a few days (or weeks), setting out the pet bed only during training.

Soon your animal will learn the perks of having its very own spot, and you can leave the pet bed out full-time.

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L I F EÑ C e l e b r a t e

Brunch on the Bright Side This Easter, serve your family one or a few of these cute and colorful recipes, a reassuring sign of sunnier days to come. recipes by A N N A H E L M B A X T E R / photographs by J E N N I F E R C A U S E Y

Yolk’s on you!

The “egg” is actually made of yogurt and lemon curd.

Easter Egg Waffles For recipe, see page 102.

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Carrot Loaf Cake Active Time 15 minutes Total Time 2 hours 10 minutes Makes 12 servings

I N G R E DI E N T S For the cake: Nonstick cooking spray 1 cup all-purpose flour 1/2 cup whole-wheat flour 1 tsp. ground cinnamon 1 tsp. baking powder 3/4 tsp. baking soda 1/2 tsp. kosher salt 1/4 tsp. ground ginger 1/8 tsp. ground nutmeg 2 large eggs 3/4 cup packed dark-brown sugar 1/2 cup vegetable oil 1/3 cup unsweetened applesauce 11/2 cups shredded carrots (from 2 large carrots) For the glaze: 3 oz. cream cheese, at room temperature 3 Tbs. confectioners’ sugar, sifted 1/2 cup heavy whipping cream 1/2 tsp. pure vanilla extract Chopped pistachios and edible flowers, for garnish (optional) MAKE IT

1. Prepare the cake: Preheat oven to 350°F. Lightly coat an 8x4-in. loaf pan with cooking spray. Line bottom and sides of pan with parchment paper, leaving a 1-in. overhang on the long sides. Set aside. Whisk together flours, cinnamon, baking powder, baking soda, salt, ginger, and nutmeg in a medium bowl.

2. Whisk together eggs, brown sugar, oil, and applesauce in a large bowl. Fold in carrots and flour mixture until just combined. Pour batter into prepared loaf pan. Bake until a wooden pick inserted into center comes out clean, 55 to 65 minutes. Transfer to a wire rack; let cool completely, about 1 hour.

3. Prepare the glaze: Stir together cream cheese and confectioners’ sugar in a medium bowl. Gradually whisk in cream until combined.

Whisk in vanilla.

4. Using parchment overhang as handles, remove cooled cake from pan, and transfer to a platter. Drizzle with glaze. Garnish with pistachios and edible flowers, if using.

NUTRITION PER SERVING

269 calories; 4g protein; 16g fat (5g sat. fat); 29g carbs; 1g fiber; 16g sugar; 1mg iron; 37mg calcium; 251mg sodium

L I F EÑ C e l e b r a t e

Raspberry Ripple Cheesecake

MAKE IT PRETTY To create those white-chocolate curls, microwave a bar of white chocolate for about 15 seconds, or until just slightly warm but not melted. Then use a Y-peeler to create tiny shavings.

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FOOD STYLING BY RISHON HANNERS. PROP STYLING BY AUDREY DAVIS.

For recipe, see page 102.

BUNNIES ON CUPCAKES? NO PROBLEM. YOU GOT THIS.

IT’S GONNA BE GREAT ™

Scan the code to hop over to this fun and festive recipe for Bunny Butt Cupcakes.

L I F EÑ C e l e b r a t e

Mini Flower Quiches Active Time 15 minutes Total Time 50 minutes Makes 8 servings

I N G R E DI E N T S 1 tsp. olive oil 4 green onions (white and pale-green parts only), finely chopped (1/4 cup) 1/2 14.1-oz. pkg. piecrust dough All-purpose flour, for work surface 2 large eggs 1/2 cup whole milk 1/4 tsp. kosher salt 1/4 tsp. black pepper 11/2 oz. Gruyère cheese, finely grated (about 1/2 cup) MAKE IT

1. Preheat oven to 350°F. Heat oil in a small nonstick skillet over medium. Add green onions; cook, stirring occasionally, until softened, 3 to 4 minutes. Remove from heat; let cool slightly, about 5 minutes.

2. Roll piecrust out on a lightly floured work surface into a 12-in. circle. Stamp out 16 shapes using 3-in.flowershaped cookie cutters, rerolling scraps as needed.

Place 1 dough flower in each of 16 cups in a 24-cup mini muffin tin, preferably silicone. (If using a metal tin, lightly coat with nonstick cooking spray first.) Press a dough flower into bottom and up sides of each cup.

3. Whisk together eggs, milk, salt, pepper, and green onions in a medium bowl.

Spoon about 1 Tbs. mixture into each dough shell in muffin tin; sprinkle with cheese. Bake until quiches are puffed and just set in centers, 20 to 25 minutes.

Remove from oven; let cool 10 minutes.

NUTRITION PER SERVING

(2 quiches) 165 calories; 5g protein; 10g fat (4g sat. fat); 14g carbs; 0 fiber; 1g sugar; 0 iron; 84mg calcium; 239mg sodium

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©2020 Tyson Foods, Inc.

L I F EÑ C e l e b r a t e

Garden Fruit Salad Active Time 15 minutes Total Time 15 minutes Makes 12 servings

Using a melon baller, scoop cantaloupe flesh into balls; discard cantaloupe rind.

I N G R E DI E N T S 1 small (about 21/4 lb.) cantaloupe 2 kiwis, peeled and cut into 1/8-in.-thick slices 1 banana, sliced 2 cups seedless red grapes, halved 1 mango, sliced (about 11/2 cups) 1 8-oz. pkg. fresh blueberries (about 11/2 cups) 1 6-oz. pkg. fresh raspberries (about 11/2 cups) MAKE IT

1. Cut cantaloupe in half; remove and discard seeds.

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2. Stamp out shapes from kiwi and banana slices using mini-size butterfly- and flowershaped cookie cutters.

3. Gently toss together cantaloupe balls, grapes, mango, blueberries, and raspberries in a large bowl. Top with fruit butterflies and flowers.

NUTRITION PER SERVING

75 calories; 1g protein; 0 fat (0 sat. fat); 19g carbs; 3g fiber; 14g sugar; 0 iron; 17mg calcium; 7mg sodium

A D V E RT I S E M E N T

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L I F E Ñ C e l e br a t e

T N

H

egg. Garnish with mini chocolate eggs or blueberries, if using.

pan about 15 minutes.

Reduce oven temperature to 300°F.

NUTRITION PER SERVING

3. Process raspberries in a food processor until smooth, about 30 seconds.

Pour through a fine-mesh strainer into a small bowl; discard solids. Whisk 1 Tbs. of the sugar into strained raspberries; set aside.

475 calories; 17g protein; 23g fat (12g sat. fat); 40g carbs; 3g fiber; 18g sugar; 2mg iron; 217mg calcium; 455mg sodium F RO M PAG E 9 6

Prep Time: 30 min.

Total Time: 4 hours 35 min. (incl. refrigerating) akes: 12 servings WH T Y U N

D

15 vanilla creme-filled chocolate sandwich cookies, divided 1 Tbsp. butter, melted 2 pkg. (8 oz. each) PHILADELPHIA Cream Cheese, softened 1/2 cup sugar 1/2 tsp. vanilla 2 eggs 1 pkg. (4 oz.) BAKER'S White Chocolate, broken into small pieces 1 Tbsp. each miniature candy-coated chocolate pieces and multi-colored sprinkles 3/4 cup thawed COOL WHIP Whipped Topping T H

T oven to 325°F. U H 10 cookies into fine crumbs; mix with butter. Press evenly onto bottoms of 12 paper-lined muffin cups.

Bake 8 min. Meanwhile, chop 4 of the remaining cookies; save for later.

B T cream cheese, sugar and vanilla in large bowl with mixer until blended.

Add eggs, one at a time, mixing on low speed after each just until blended.

Stir in reserved chopped cookies.

Spoon evenly over crusts.

22 to 25 min. or until centers B of cheesecakes are almost set.

Cool completely.

F G T cheesecakes 2 hrs.

Meanwhile, cover baking sheet with parchment. Microwave white chocolate in microwaveable bowl on HIGH 1 min., stirring every 30 sec.

Then, microwave and stir in 10-sec. increments just until chocolate is completely melted when stirred.

(Don't over heat.) Spread chocolate into thin layer on prepared baking sheet.

H P remaining cookie; sprinkle over melted chocolate along with the candy-coated chocolate pieces and sprinkles. Refrigerate until firm.

T P cheesecakes with COOL WHIP just before serving. Break chocolate bark into small pieces; place over cheesecakes.

Raspberry Ripple Cheesecake Active Time 25 minutes Total Time 10 hours, including 6 hours of refrigeration Makes 12 servings

F RO M PAG E 9 4

I N G R E DI E N T S 1 cup all-purpose flour 1 cup whole-wheat flour 1 Tbs. baking powder 1 Tbs. granulated sugar 1/4 tsp. kosher salt 2 large eggs 13/4 cups buttermilk 1/4 cup unsalted butter, melted 11/2 cups plain whole-milk Greek yogurt 3/4 cup lemon curd Mini chocolate Easter eggs or fresh blueberries, for garnish (optional)

I N G R E DI E N T S 1 cup graham-cracker crumbs (from about 9 whole graham crackers) 2 Tbs. unsalted butter, melted 11/2 cups fresh or thawed frozen raspberries (6 oz.)

1 cup plus 1 Tbs. granulated sugar, divided 3 8-oz. pkgs. cream cheese, at room temperature 1 tsp. pure vanilla extract 1/2 tsp. kosher salt 3 large eggs 1/2 cup sour cream Boiling water, for a water bath Fresh raspberries, fresh strawberries, and white-chocolate curls, for garnish (optional)

MAKE IT

MAKE IT

Easter Egg Waffles Active Time 35 minutes Total Time 45 minutes Makes 6 servings

1. Preheat oven to 200°F. Preheat a 7-in. round waffle maker to medium-high.

Whisk together flours, baking powder, sugar, and salt in a large bowl. Whisk together eggs, buttermilk, and butter in a separate bowl until combined. Pour egg mixture into flour mixture; whisk until combined and no large lumps remain. Let stand 10 minutes.

2. Pour 1/3 cup batter into preheated waffle maker; close lid. Cook until golden brown and crisp, 4 to 5 minutes. Place waffle on oven rack in oven to keep warm. Repeat process with remaining batter to make 5 more waffles.

3. Arrange a waffle on each of six plates. Spoon 1/4 cup yogurt onto the side of each waffle; drag the back of a spoon through yogurt to create a swoop effect.

Dollop each yogurt swoop with 2 Tbs. lemon curd to look like a sunny-side-up

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1. Preheat oven to 350°F. Wrap exterior of a 9-in. springform pan (including base) in a double layer of aluminum foil; set aside.

2. Stir together cracker crumbs and butter in a medium bowl. Press mixture firmly in an even layer onto bottom of pan. Bake until crust begins to brown, about 10 minutes. Transfer to a wire rack; let cool in

4. Beat cream cheese with a stand mixer fitted with a paddle attachment on medium speed until fluffy, about 3 minutes. With mixer running on low speed, gradually add remaining 1 cup sugar. Add vanilla and salt; beat until well combined, about 15 seconds. Add eggs, 1 at a time, beating until just combined, about 1 minute. Beat in sour cream until incorporated, about 30 seconds.

5. Pour half of the creamcheese mixture over cooled crust. Dollop half of the raspberry mixture over cream-cheese mixture in teaspoonfuls. Using a skewer, swirl raspberry dollops into creamcheese mixture. Repeat process with remaining cream-cheese mixture and raspberry mixture.

6. Place cake in springform pan inside a large roasting pan. Transfer to oven. Pour boiling water into roasting pan to reach halfway up sides of springform pan.

Bake until cake is set but slightly wobbly in center, 60 to 65 minutes. Turn oven off and prop oven door open using a wooden spoon. Let cool in oven for 1 hour.

7. Transfer cake in springform pan to a wire rack; let cake cool completely, about 1 hour.

Refrigerate, uncovered, at least 6 hours or overnight.

8. Run a knife around edge of cake in springform pan; remove sides of pan.

Garnish cake with additional raspberries, strawberries, and white-chocolate curls, if using.

NUTRITION PER SERVING

363 calories; 6g protein; 25g fat (14g sat. fat); 30g carbs; 1g fiber; 23g sugar; 1mg iron; 81mg calcium; 284mg sodium

©2021 Kraft Foods

A D V E RT I S E M E N T

OUR FAVES AND RAVES M

J E N N Y,

HEIDI

W

MO S E’

ALICIA, M AG

,E SM

IE

MOM S ’

IN

N

(PET MOM EDITION)

Pet moms weigh in on the brands they trust to nurture, nourish, and delight their furry companions.

G

I

S E’

MOM

FAVES:

FAVES:

FAVES:

HILL’S SC IE NC E DIET

CESAR® S I M P LY C R A F T E Dª

CA N I DA E S U S TA I N

RAVES:

RAVES:

RAVES:

“Winnie is our first-ever furry family member, and I’m smitten! We feed her Hill’s Science Diet because it’s made from natural ingredients that fuel her energy and keep her healthy.”

“Everyone’s happy when I pull Cesar Simply Crafted out for a special treat.

Esme practically dances to her food bowl, and I’m thrilled because I can SEE the colorful veggies in every serving.”

THE DEETS:

Our science-led nutrition helps create differences you can see, feel and trust so we’re always a step ahead for your pet.

HillsStepAhead.com

THE DEETS:

Lots of love in a little package.

That’s what’s so special about your pup and CESAR® Simply Crafted.™ Cesar.com © 2021 Mars or Affiliates

“We choose healthy, quality food for ourselves— and we want the same for Maggie! I love Canidae Sustain dog food because it uses real ingredients with no icky fillers and it’s eco-friendly, too!”

THE DEETS:

Nurture your pet and the planet with Canidae Sustain, featuring sustainable packaging and responsibly sourced, premium proteins like cage-free chicken.

Canidae.com

Ages + Stages ADVICE AS YOUR CHILD GROWS

0 –12 MONTHS

HOW TO

Start a Reading Habit

by J E N N I F E R R A I N E Y M A R Q U E Z

Create a routine.

Even though your little one may be too young to understand, reading to them as early as possible has a huge impact on brain development and academic performance later in life. In a study published in Pediatrics, researchers gave educational materials and children’s books to low-income parents of babies ages 5 to 11 months, and found that by the time the kids were 18 to 25 months old, they had significantly higher vocabulary scores than children who weren’t given books. So try to make reading a daily affair, even if your sessions last only five or ten minutes. The single biggest predictor of a child’s vocabulary size at age 3 is the number of words that were spoken to them up until that point.

Reading every day also offers less tangible benefits: It teaches your kid that you value books, creates a positive association with stories, and provides cuddle time with you.

Keep them captivated.

Babies love bright, contrasting colors and images of familiar objects or people.

Pictures of faces help your baby start

Get More Age-Specific Tips Simply hover your phone’s camera over the smart code to subscribe to our daily newsletter.

to comprehend emotions. Try “reading” a photo album of images of family, friends, neighbors—even the dog.

Point to people and say, “Mommy looks happy here,” or “That boy seems a little sad.” At around 4 months or so, when your child is able to point and grab, they’ll be drawn to books that they can manipulate. Look for soft fabrics, reflective pages, crinkly sounds, or flaps and tabs to lift and pull. Try Wee Gallery’s Good Night You, Good Night Me or Play Tabs’s Baby Animals. Interactive books will hold their attention and can help with motor skills too.

Repeat again and again.

You may inwardly groan when your baby points to the same Sandra Boynton book ten times in a row, but experts say all that repetition is both exciting and comforting.

It’s a big developmental milestone when your baby can anticipate what’s coming next. Plus, when they hear the same word frequently, they’re more likely to store it in their little memory bank once talking starts. Consider the upside: There’s no need to invest in a large library of books, at least in the beginning. You’ll be fine with a handful of choices that your baby can enjoy over and over.

Have fun.

Shake up your book time a bit by singing the words on the page or acting out the story’s plot using funny faces or voices.

Try to engage in what is often called serve and return: Encourage them to mimic what you’re saying or doing, then copy the sounds they make back to them.

This can be especially fun once babbling starts, usually at around 5 or 6 months.

“Did you say ‘bee-bee’? That’s right, this car in the book does go beep-beep. This is a blue car, just like the one we have.”

Bringing in funny vibes and conversation will enhance bonding time while further developing your child’s vocabulary and enjoyment around reading.

Sources: Rahil Briggs, Psy.D., national director of Zero to Three’s HealthySteps program, in Washington, D.C.; Jill Kelner, an infant-development specialist formerly at La Rabida Children’s Hospital, in Chicago.

1 –2 Y E A R S

HOW TO

Get Kids to Sit Still

by TA M E K I A R E E C E

Be patient.

Toddlers are hardwired to move. Your kid isn’t trying to drive you crazy by getting up out of their seat seemingly every few seconds. (Really!) Developmentally, they’re discovering independence and working to master physical skills like walking, running, climbing, and jumping. This makes it tough for them to remain seated for longer than a few minutes. Getting them to sit still is going to take time and patience, but it’s doable.

Make it worthwhile.

Consider this: Usually, when a toddler must sit, that means they’re missing out on something else, like running around, playing with toys, or investigating the thing under the couch. Show kids that good stuff happens when they’re seated too. Try interesting activities that require focus and make your child want to sit, like tacking stickers onto paper, building with blocks, finger-painting, or banging on pots. And don’t forget that you are actually your child’s favorite toy.

They may be inclined to sit longer if you’re right there beside them or if you place them in your lap while you sing songs or read to them.

Set them up for success.

When your toddler holds still for a few minutes to do a fun activity, praise them: “Alex, you’re doing a great job sitting quietly while Mommy reads you the story.” As your child’s self-control gets better, extend the time by switching to

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A G E S + S TA G E S

another exciting activity while they’re still sitting. Work up to longer periods over time. Also, get toddler-size furniture.

A small table and chair that your child can manage without help will encourage them to sit by themself.

Do some prep work.

If you know your kid will have to sit for a while, say, during a haircut, make sure they aren’t tired, hungry, or thirsty, and they’ve used the bathroom. If you’re venturing to a salon or a barber outside of the home (no more bowl cuts), stash some fun but quiet toys and a few snacks in your bag, and give them a heads-up about what will occur and what you expect of them.

In either case, you might say, “You will be getting a haircut. You need to sit still so whoever is cutting your hair can do a good job.” Then let your child burn off some energy by dancing or running around before they get the new do.

Sources: Stacy Haynes, Ed.D., a counseling psychologist at Little Hands Family Services, in Turnersville, New Jersey; Florencia Segura, M.D., a pediatrician at Einstein Pediatrics, in Vienna, Virginia.

3–4 YEARS

HOW TO

Deal With Bossy Behavior

by M I C H E L L E C R O U C H

Offer choices whenever possible.

Listen and acknowledge your child’s demand and then restate it in language that is more acceptable.

that is more acceptable. You can say, “I know you want Mommy’s attention.

So you’d really like me to get you some Goldfish crackers? I think you meant to say, ‘May I please have some Goldfish?’ ” Explain to your child that it’s okay to ask for what they want, but it’s important to think about how and when they say it.

Be a good role model.

Tone matters. It’s tough for kids to learn to ask for things nicely if you boss them around and get annoyed with them when things don’t go your way. Make sure to say “please” when you ask your child to do something and “thank you” afterward.

If they are in the middle of a sentence, instead of abruptly interrupting them to say that they need to hurry and wash up because it’s time for bed, let them finish and then say, “I hear you. Thank you for stating your thoughts so clearly.

Now I’d like you to please clean up so we can get ready for bedtime.” If your child sees you setting a good example, they are more likely to model your behavior.

Try a “redo.”

Don’t take it personally.

Preschoolers know what they want, and experts say it’s normal for them to experiment with power and test boundaries by being mouthy and demanding. Try not to get upset when your child demands a snack “right now” or rudely orders you to “stop talking” when you’re on the phone. Instead, be patient and work on teaching them an appropriate way to express their needs.

Restate their request politely.

Listen and acknowledge your child’s demand and then restate it in language

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When your child makes a rude demand, instead of getting angry and reacting with a quick retort (which turns the moment into a power struggle), smile and say something like, “Can you say that in a kinder way?” Then wait and give them a chance to come through.

Remember to pour on the praise, and consider saying “yes” when they ask politely the first time, even if the request is a bit inconvenient for you. This reinforces that good things can happen when they ask nicely, and they’ll be more apt to do so in the future.

Barking orders is your child’s way of trying to grab some control in a world where they feel they don’t have any. So turn over some power to them on a daily basis by offering choices: “Do you want to wear the red shirt or the blue one?” “Do you want trail mix or an apple for your snack?” Giving kids some agency builds confidence, and over time, it may lessen their need to be in charge. With your help, the bossiness will transform into leadership skills and assertiveness that will help them find success down the line.

Sources: Richard Bromfield, Ph.D., a psychologist at Harvard Medical School and author of How to Unspoil Your Child Fast; Tamar Chansky, Ph.D., a psychologist in Philadelphia and author of Freeing Your Child From Anxiety.

5–6 YEARS

HOW TO

Introduce Chores

by B E T H H O WA R D

Choose the right words.

If you’ve never expected your child to do chores before, they’re going to wonder, “Why is Daddy making me empty the dishwasher or set the table now?” So appeal to their desire to be more grown-up.

It can be as simple as saying, “Now that you’re 5, you’re stronger, taller, and more careful. I bet you can sort the forks and spoons.” To make your child feel like a useful member of the household, ask them to be a “helper” rather than to “help out.” Remind them of other skills they’ve mastered, like completing puzzles or finding lost objects, and link that to tasks you know they’re capable of doing. This approach boosts their self-image and might even inspire them to look for other opportunities to assist you.

Try teamwork.

Sure, you’re not always going to want to do your chores at the same time that

your child does theirs. But saying “Let’s straighten up the house together” will help get a reluctant kid started. Young children often respond better when tasks are presented as a shared family responsibility. While it’s fine to coach them on the right way to do things, expect imperfection. Praise their efforts rather than criticizing the result, and they’ll continue to improve.

Have some fun.

Chores don’t have to be boring. Put on music and encourage kids to sing or dance while cleaning. Or create contests to keep them interested, such as, “Let’s see how many toys we can put away before the kitchen timer buzzes.” Kids may also enjoy chores more if they can choose them. Provide a list of things that need to be done (sweep the floor, sponge off the counter, or dust the tables), and let them pick one.

Reward your child.

Offer your kids a special activity when the job is done; tell them, “When all your books are put away, we can go outside and play ball.” To track their daily responsibilities, create a chore chart. This will allow them to check off their work. At the end of a productive week, perhaps they can pick their favorite movie to watch. Letting your child know that you’ll have time for an activity they like if a chore is completed is much more effective than offering an allowance for doing it. Once you reward your child monetarily, it becomes difficult to persuade them to help without giving them money.

Sources: Meg Akabas, founder of Parenting Solutions, in New York City; Deborah Gilboa, M.D., author of Get the Behavior You Want Without Being the Parent You Hate!

To make your child feel like a useful member of the household, ask them to be a “helper” rather than to “help out.”

7+ Y E A R S

HOW TO

Motivate Your Kid to Keep Trying

by AVA B R A M S O N

Encourage experiential learning.

Your child has been figuring out how to conquer challenges since they were a baby. In order to help them stick with things that aren’t easy, look for ways to emphasize the relationship between effort and achievement. Keep in mind that children need lots of experiences in putting in a little effort and having a little success. Find activities that may be difficult for your kid in the beginning but will make them feel proud when they’ve mastered them. Earlier on, that may have been riding a bike without training wheels, but now it could be hitting a trick shot in the basketball hoop or putting together a toy or a small piece of furniture by themself.

whole picture. For example, it’s easy to jump to the conclusion that everybody else understands what’s happening in math class and they’re the only one who doesn’t. Steer your child away from making comparisons with others by explaining the importance of focusing on the progress they’ve made over time. Doing so can help kids take ownership of their hard work. If you keep reminding your child of this when comparisons come up, they’ll notice how far they have come and be motivated to push forward.

Source: Eileen Kennedy-Moore, Ph.D., Parents advisor and author of Kid Confidence: Help Your Child Make Friends, Build Resilience, and Develop Real Self-Esteem

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Send your funny story to kidquotes@ parents.com. Include your full mailing address, phone number, and your eligible child’s name and date of birth.

Subject to Terms and Conditions at parents.com/gigglespromotion. Open to legal residents of the 50 United States and the District of Columbia, 21 years or older. One submission per person per email address per day. Void where prohibited. Sponsor: Meredith Corporation, 225 Liberty St., New York, NY 10281.

Put it in perspective.

Keep your eyes open for situations in which your kid struggled and then triumphed, and be ready to whip those stories out when they need motivation: “Do you remember when you were first learning to ride your skateboard and you’d be so upset when you fell down? Now we can hardly get you off it!” Kids this age are starting to come up with a sense of who they are as people. They are likely to come to the conclusion that they’re either “good at” something or “bad at” it.

Reminding them of their past successes builds confidence and helps them move past the fear of trying something new.

Help them make realistic comparisons.

By now, children are starting to see how they relate to their peers; with virtual learning, their view may be all the more distorted because they’re not seeing the

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Iris, 4 I was teaching my daughter that it’s important not to say unkind things, even if the other person says something unkind first: “Two wrongs don’t make a right,” I explained. Iris thought about it for a minute and then asked, “What about three wrongs?”

Scarlett, 7 While drinking from a bottle of spring water, my daughter remarked how delicious it was.

“Do they make summer water too?” she asked.

Chris Aguirre Phoenix, CA

Erin Maltbie Framingham, MA

Simon, 3

This morning, I asked my son if he wanted his sandwich cut in triangles or squares. He replied, “Pentagons.”

Lea, 3 My daughter recently got a necklace and an Elsa watch as presents.

I explained to her that they were “big-girl gifts” and she needed to treat them well, especially because the necklace was real silver. Lea responded, “And because the watch is real purple?”

Ariel Eckstein Astoria, NY

Elise Hay Seattle, WA

Scarlett, 2

Got a Funny Kid Quote to Share?

Cora, 4

Simply hover your phone’s camera over the smart code for a chance to be featured.

Or email kidquotes@ parents.com. See the abbreviated terms on page 107.

After watching The Polar Express, I suggested to my daughter that we go on The Polar Express Train Ride someday.

She frowned and said, “I think I want to go to the panda one.” My husband and I were confused until we realized she was talking about ... Panda Express.

Anna Cummins Ava, MO

PA R E N T S

108 A P R I L

2021

I told my daughter that Daddy was “picking up our new car,” and she asked, “It fell over??”

Taryn Sarnoff Los Angeles, CA

PAUL THORBURN. PARENTS (ISSN 1083-6373); April 2021, Vol. 96, No. 4, is published monthly by Meredith Corporation, 1716 Locust Street, Des Moines, IA 50309-3023. Periodicals postage paid at Des Moines, IA, and at additional mailing offices. Subscription prices, $15.98 per year in the U.S.; $27.00 (U.S. dollars) in Canada; $49.00 (U.S. dollars) overseas. POSTMASTER: Send all UAA to CFS. (See DMM 507.1.5.2); NON-POSTAL AND MILITARY FACILITIES: Send address corrections to Parents, P.O. Box 37508, Boone, IA 50037-0508. In Canada: mailed under Publications Mail Sales Product Agreement No. 40069223; Canadian BN 12348 2887 RT. © Meredith Corporation 2021. All rights reserved. Your bank may provide updates to the card information we have on file. You may opt out of this service at any time. Printed in the U.S.A.

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