FamilyLife - October 2020

Thanksgiving Feast

Organizing a playroom

Homework Help

FamilyLife

Giving Thanks

October 2020

October Contents

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33

58

ADVICE

ORGANIZE

FOOD

ON THE COVER

11 Not So Scary Treats

33 Do You *Really* Need To Rake Up Leaves?

58 Giving Thanks

Photography by Maya Visnyei

15 Fun Once the Turkey’s Done 19 Embracing Failure 23 The Quiet Place 7 The Art of the Apology

39 Little Playrooms

FEATURES 45 Welcome to kindergarten 48 Homework Help

IN EVERY ISSUE 8 Editor's Letter 74 Last Look

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FamilyLife EDITOR IN-CHIEF Pamela Hayford EXECUTIVE EDITOR Suzanne Moutis CREATIVE DIRECTOR Karen Paddon EDITORIAL OPERATIONS & ASSISTANT BUSINESS MANAGER Olga Goncalves Costa TEST KITCHEN FOOD DIRECTOR Soo Kim SENIOR FOOD ASSOCIATE Stina Diös CONTRIBUTING FOOD SPECIALISTS Donna Borooah, Cara Tegler ART DEPUTY ART DIRECTOR Lena Diaz ASSOCIATE ART DIRECTOR Sarah Big Canoe CONTRIBUTING ART DIRECTOR Leanne Gilbert PRODUCTION SPECIALIST Genevieve Pizzale EDITORIAL SENIOR FEATURES EDITOR Megan Howard FEATURES EDITOR Mary Levitski COPY EDITORS Debbie Madsen Villamere, Stephanie Zolis EDITORIAL ASSISTANTS Marianne Davidson, Sarah Dziedzic HOME & GARDEN HOME & STYLE DIRECTOR Ann Marie Favot DESIGN EDITOR Morgan Lindsay NATIONAL ACCOUNTS MANAGERS, TORONTO David Lawrence, John McDowell, Nicole Rosen, Roberta Thomson NATIONAL ACCOUNTS MANAGER, MONTREAL Ingrid Barfod NATIONAL ACCOUNT MANAGER, VANCOUVER Renee Wong BRAND OPERATIONS MANAGER Terry Smith

VICE PRESIDENT, CORPORATE SALES & DIRECTOR, CLIENT SOLUTIONS Brandon Kirk DIRECTOR, MEDIA SALES Mike Lambe ST. JOSEPH COMMUNICATIONS CHAIRMAN & CEO Tony Gagliano VICE CHAIRMAN John Gagliano PRESIDENT & PUBLISHER Ken Hunt VICE PRESDIENT, OPERATIONS & TECHNOLOGY Sean McCluskey EXECUTIVE VICE PRESIDENT Sarah Trimble DIRECTOR, LIFESTYLE CONTENT Sasha Emmons DIRECTOR, CONTENT OPERATIONS James Reid DIRECTOR, CIRCULATION Allan Yue MANAGER, CIRCULATION Lisa Rivers DIRECTOR, BRANDED CONTENT, AUDIENCE & EVENTS Nadine Silverthorne PROJECT MANAGER, BRANDED CONTENT Milena Boskovic EXECUTIVE EDITOR, BRANDED CONTENT Meaghan Yuen DESIGNER, BRANDED CONTENT Leo Tapel Family Life is published by St. Joseph Communications, 15 Benton Road, Toronto, M6M 3G2. Contents Copyright 2020 by St. Joseph Communications. may not be reprinted without written permission. Article proposals and manuscripts must be accompanied by self-addressed envelopes and sufficient postage; otherwise they will not be returned or acknowledged.

While the publishers will take all reasonable care, they will not be responsible for the loss of any manuscript, drawing or photograph. ISSN 0128-1839. Single copy price $5.99 + tax. Full subscription prices: Canada, 1 year (6 issues), $15 + tax. In the U.S., 1 year $45 + tax; Other countries $75 + tax, Indexed in the Canadian Periodical Index. Printed in Canada. Family Life, it's affiliate and assignees may use, reproduce, publish, distribute, store and archive such as unsolicited submissions in whole or in part in any form or medium whatsoever, without compensate of any sort.

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Editor's Letter

Trick or Treat?

We discovered this when she was 2, and it made Halloween and trick-or-treating a bit difficult. When she would go around the neighborhood, she would say, “Trick or treat! No peanuts, please.” For the most part, she was given treats without peanuts. There were times someone wouldn’t hear her, and she’d end up with a Snickers or Reese’s. After trick-or-treating, she and her friends would trade candy so she could get rid of the peanut products.

When her kids would get home from trick-or-treating, they could eat a few pieces of candy, but then they’d leave out the rest for the candy fairy. Overnight, the candy fairy would visit and take the candy and replace it with a toy. Whether you’re dealing with a food allergy or just too much candy, check out ways to deal with all of those treats.

October brings not only fall fun, but also the season of grade cards and parent-teacher conferences. It’s a good time to check in on your child’s grades.

Pamela Hayford Editor In-Chief

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Advice

Not So Scary Treats

By REGAN LYONS

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Advice Halloween is a time for tricks, treats, haunted houses and spooky costumes, but it can be an extra scary time for parents who have children with food allergies. Much of the candy handed out door to door contains the top eight food allergens, including peanuts, wheat, milk, eggs, tree nuts and soy. Here are a few ways to make sure this year is full of treats for your kids, and no scary tricks.

FoodAllergy.org says 5.6 million children or nearly 8 percent have food allergies according to results from a 2015-2016 survey. That’s equal to one in 13 children or roughly two in every classroom.

Take the Relative Route

Follow the Teal Pumpkins

One way to make sure your child doesn’t come in contact with foods he’s allergic to on Halloween is to only trick-or-treat family and close friends who are aware of your child’s allergies. Kim and Travis Lawson, parents of three from Country Club, MO, say when their son with a peanut allergy was younger, they simply visited their parents for trick-or-treating. “It’s really scary at Halloween, because he can’t have a lot of the candy,” Kim says. “When he was younger, we just went to our parents’ house.”

In 2014, Food Allergy Research & Education created the Teal Pumpkin Project, a campaign to raise awareness of food allergies and provide safe options for food allergic trick-or-treaters. Participants in the project place a teal pumpkin outside their home to let trick-or-treaters know they’re offering safe non-food treats, like small toys. Keep your eye out for the teal pumpkins and let those homeowners know how you appreciate their participation. If you’d like more information about the Teal Pumpkin Project, visit FoodAllergy.org.

Candy Swap As soon as your kids return from trick-ot-treating, help them look through their candy and check the ingredients. “We make two different piles of candy.

One for things he can eat and one for things he can’t eat. Then we explain why he can’t have them,” says Kim. If you are trick-or-treating with friends or siblings, let them trade candy for things they are able to eat.

Swaps can help ease their disappointment about the candy they aren’t able to have.

Bring Your Own Treats Kids always look forward to their fall parties at school, but school can be a dangerous place for kids with food allergies. “The first day of school I was a nervous wreck,” says Kim. To ease your mind, talk to your child’s teacher and the volunteers organizing the party so they are aware of your child’s allergies. Offer to bring the treats for the whole class, so you know exactly what the ingredients are and your child doesn’t feel left out by not having the same treat as his classmates. “If Ben goes to a party and can have the same cupcake as the other kids, he’s ecstatic because that doesn’t happen often, and he doesn’t understand why,” says Travis.

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No Snacking on the Go Before you leave for a night of fun, make sure your child knows no snacking on candy is allowed until you’re home and have gone through what candy is safe. While out trick-or-treating, your child may be tempted to let down her guard, reach into her stash and grab a piece of candy to snack on without checking the label, which can be extremely risky.

Change Your Trick-orTreat to “No ______ Please” One way to try to avoid a certain allergen would be to say, “Trick-or-treat, no (fill in the allergen), please!” at each door. This is a nice way to let the neighbor know about your child’s allergen. However, be aware this still might not weed out all candies without that allergen.

Many people don’t realize how many foods may contain peanuts, milk or soy, so your child still might end up with off-limits candy.

Advice

Fun Once the Turkey’s Done

By EMILY MORRISON

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Advice It’s no secret the highlight of most everyone’s Thanksgiving holiday is the big meal. You probably dream about your favorite side dishes the week before (or maybe that’s just me). Sure, greeting Aunt Martha after months apart is exciting, or catching up with Grandma Susan is sweet, but the food sure helps bring families together.

To maintain that engagement and socializing after the plates are cleared, you may need some fresh ideas before guests slowly sneak out the door. We’ve compiled a list of activities to help you continue the fun after the turkey’s done. Make the most of time with your loved ones this year.

Mad libs This is a family favorite for all occasions on my dad’s side, so you might give it a shot this season.

Each silly story usually brings the family to tears from laughing so hard. You can find printables online, but writing your own can be entertaining.

Outdoor Scavenger Hunt This would be fun to set up right after eating (in case you’re already thinking about a nap). A scavenger hunt gets the kids up and moving around if they’re antsy after the meal.

Set Up the Christmas Tree I don’t know about you, but immediately after Thanksgiving I am in the Christmas spirit. A good reason to start setting up is that your whole family is already over to help, and it’s a great way to continue the holiday spirit.

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Guess How Many

Thanksgiving Charades

Fill a jar with candy corn, place it in the center of the table and have guests take a gander. The person who guesses correctly gets to take the whole thing home.

This, at least, could serve as a nice icebreaker.

You may start out with Thanksgiving themes, but favorite movies or TV shows might soon take the spotlight. That’s okay, because anything that entertains your in-laws and the kiddos is a win.

Browse Through Photo Albums

Make a Hot Chocolate Bar

In an era of selfies and Snapchat, sifting through old photo albums can fascinate. I enjoyed browsing through the same two photo albums at my grandparents’ house each time I visited. Sit down with your relatives and take some time to ask questions about each photo’s unique story.

A hot chocolate bar is another great opportunity to mingle. Set up a table with add-ons like marshmallows, whipped cream, chocolate chips and candy pieces. Have a crockpot full of homemade hot chocolate ready to go after your meal.

Take a Family Photo You have plenty of random selfies on your phone, but it’s not often the whole family is in one spot. Humor your mom and take a group photo, a photo with just the siblings, any and all shots. You will be happy you have these to look at later.

Advice

Embracing Failure

By CHRISTIAN BARNES

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Advice Ready, set, ... fail? So often, in the course of raising children, we keep our gaze looking toward the next milestone, achievement or success. But did you know that failing needs to be a lesson on the road to maturity? And it’s just as important as achieving success Perhaps the most important work that needs to be done when embracing failure is defining it. What does failure mean to you? For some people, it’s the end of the world. For others, it’s simply a mistake, a learning and growing experience. One of those perceptions inspires dread, the other gives hope. But the question is a valid one, because what you believe as a parent will be passed down to your children. Your fears will become theirs if you aren’t careful.

“Kids need to learn how to fail so they know they can survive it. When they fail and overcome, they learn that failure doesn’t define them,” says Kansas City teacher Sheri Thompson, who has spent 23 years with children. She has a degree in early childhood education and has taught kids from kindergarten to high school. She is a big believer that parents need to learn to embrace failure in their children’s lives and not try to avoid it at all costs. “When you’re young, you learn the coping mechanisms to overcome failure,” she says. “It’s important because as you grow older, the consequences of failing become greater.”

If children never fail, they never learn they can get past it. This is a huge stumbling block that can develop into a fear of failure and result in kids’ being afraid to try new things. Unless kids deliberately work through this, the fear can continue into adulthood and limit opportunities.

As a parent, you can help your child overcome a fear of failing by focusing more on the effort put into achieving something than the actual goal. Sometimes your child will go into a situation as a top contender.

Other times, she may be the underdog. Both of these situations can hold equal victory if you recognize and applaud the fact that she’s giving everything she has toward reaching the goal. Of course, coming out on top, getting the grade or winning the prize is more fun, but recognizing the effort over the outcome gives her the courage to go after the goal again if she falls short.

Thompson says failure teaches persistence, a key to a successful life. “It’s healthy development to learn how to persevere. We want our kids to keep trying. It inspires creativity and tenacity,” she says. It also keeps doors open.

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Let’s face it. Everyone fails at something. In fact, the first time you try something, there’s a good chance you will fail. But do you really? If you are stepping out and trying something new—a sport, a hobby, a career— and you don’t come out on top, should that really be counted as failure? Or should it be applauded as going after something new? As having courage?

It’s unrealistic to think your children will be an immediate success at whatever they try. Some kids are natural athletes and hit every shot they shoot or ball that’s pitched. Others have to work hard just to keep their eye on the ball. Some kids seem to be born reciting multiplication facts, and others have to battle through math each step of the way. That’s just the reality of abilities and aptitudes, but they have nothing to do with whether your child is a success or failure. In raising whole and healthy children, help them learn that giving everything they’ve got, no matter how talented they are, should count for more than anything that comes naturally.

We also need to be realistic in our efforts to encourage our children. Not every Little League player is going to make the MLB, nor is every gymnast going to make it to the Olympics. We parents need to manage our expectations and help kids manage theirs. Dr. Kate Roberts says in her article “When Parents Lie,” the words we use are very important. “Researchers at MIT have found that children are not gullible and can, in fact, sense when parents are lying to them, causing them to distrust the very people who are their caretakers. Children also know when parents are withholding information.”

Instead, work on giving children a healthy perspective of self. You can start by telling them what you aren’t good at. Share a time you tried and failed or when you realized you weren’t going to be the Broadway star or the next Albert Einstein. Laugh at yourself and teach your child to do the same. Sign kids up for sports because you want them to exercise and socialize instead of wanting them to get a scholarship. It lessens pressure and allows events to take their course.

Advice Thompson recounts a group outing where a boy walked into the room and said, “Okay, I’m going to be the worst bowler here.” He then proceeded to bowl poorly—but he was able to laugh at his inability and still have a great time with his friends. His lack of skill did not hinder his enjoyment.

Embracing failure doesn’t mean kids give up on their dreams or settle for less than they can be. In fact, it means just the opposite and can be extremely important in achieving success.

Thompson says, “It’s okay to have high expectations, just help them recognize they’re going to have setbacks along the way. Help them to be realistic about what they can achieve and encourage them to go for it.”

And if you’re looking for a way to introduce the concept to your kids, I highly recommend the movie Meet the Robinsons by Disney. It focuses on a boy genius named Lewis who spends most of his time looking back at the past and his failures. This quirky movie has an awesome message about focusing on the good that can come out of bad and celebrates the lessons that come from failure. It’s a great way to open the door for your child to see the value of the journey to success.

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Advice

The Quiet Place Finding Peace in Your Own Home

By KIM ANTISDEL Our home has its own soundtrack.

During the weekdays, the house is alive with giggles and squeals and the occasional scream as our son prepares for, and arrives home from, preschool. The dogs are constantly barking—especially if FedEx is making a visit—and the smoke detector is likely to go off at least one or twice because I burned the chicken. Again.

The weekend brings its own special audio mix of swinging hammers and electric saws slicing into 2x4’s as my husband works on his latest home reno project. The Moana soundtrack likely blares from Alexa as she entertains my son during his bath.

The refrigerator diligently hums along through it all.

There’s always noise. Not most of the time. Not a great deal of the time. ALL. THE. TIME. In more recent months, the sound has seemed to swell even more. For this we can thank COVID-19, which has forced our family of five to stay within these walls for what I can only describe as an insurmountable length of time. We seem to have no escape from the constant barrage of clamoring throughout this space.

We’re many months into this journey of constant togetherness, so we made some adjustments to help tune out the crazy clatter. Here’s what we’re trying:

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Advice

Give permission for quiet.

Get out–literally.

Our family is a mixed bag of introverts and extroverts, but the fact is, we all need a little time to ourselves. We’ve made a priority of giving our kids—and ourselves— permission to be alone. With our teenage daughters, this is a foregone conclusion. A fully charged phone and a subscription to Netflix are just the ticket. With our 5-yearold son, it’s not so easy. We recently began turning off the “boob tube” (for you youngsters, that’s slang for “television”) and requiring that, for at least one hour, he do something on his own. He can play in his room, take a nap, read, build a city with his trains. But he must do it on his own, quietly. He fought the decree initially but caught on quickly when he realized we were serious. Now, it’s not so hard to convince him.

Speak with your partner and preserve one hour of “no talk zone” for each of you per day. Just like the parameters we gave our son. No one can bother your partner while he’s in his hour zone, and vice versa for you. And if I can make a suggestion, use the time for a long walk alone. You will be amazed at how much better you feel after an endorphin boost while birds sing your praises. Or Ozzy Osbourne screeches in your headphones. To each her own.

Establish a no-phone zone.

Our phones are easily one of the biggest sources of noise.

Even if our phones are silenced, we can still hear the vibration or see the light from a notification. Did someone like our Facebook post? Did I just get an interesting notification about a stock I invested in? The sound may not be audible, but phones create mental noise that’s not healthy. Consider taking a few hours a day to turn off your phone. Power it down or put it in airplane mode and leave it alone. Take that walk or go out to the garden. I promise, your notifications will be there when you get back.

Read. Read. Read.

Spoiler alert: It doesn’t matter what you read. It can be gore. It can be a dishwasher manual. It can be dark psychological thrillers where people get axe murdered left and right (but that’s just me). Find a quiet corner in your house for 20 minutes a day. Tell yourself you won’t stop reading until you’ve finished two chapters. Reading quiets our minds so we can process the words and make room in our imaginations for the content we’re consuming. It’s one of the best activities you can do to better yourself, your mood and your outlook on life. Also, get yourself a library card and download the Libby app. You can check books out using your library card and have them delivered to your phone. Life changing.

Three Quick Ways to Cut the Noise: 24

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Hear healthy noise: Hundreds of apps and white noise makers are available that help drown out the sound of leaky faucets, crickets and neighborhood parties. Get one today and sleep better tonight. White noise is the best noise.

October 2020 - Family Life

Get up earlier than everyone else.

Okay, you probably already do this to get a jump on the dishes, laundry or lesson plans for home learning. But if you can swing it, get up an extra 30 minutes before that.

Grab a steaming a cup of coffee and just sit … in silence.

No phone. No TV. No distractions. Take deep breaths in and let them go. Then get going on the dishes.

Strip down social media.

If you’re like me, you love seeing your best friend’s family photos with cute captions about bubblegum smiles. You get your daily dose of news from Facebook and cheap entertainment from Tik Tok. But guess what? Social media is not real life. The whole intent of Instagram and similar sites is to show a life that isn’t attainable. And real research shows we actually feel worse about ourselves when we see others in their chosen reality. So do yourself a big ol’ favor and set limits on the amount of time you spend on these sites. A quick Google search will show you how to limit your time consumption on apps; you won’t even have to think about it.

Truly connect.

We’re always hearing, but how often do we really listen? Try an experiment. Ask your spouse or partner a question that requires true thought one night over dinner. For example: “What was the first movie you went to? Tell me about the whole experience.” Then sit back and focus on nothing but the answer. Tune out everything else and intensely listen. Believe me, your partner will be shocked that you care so much about this very ordinary question. As humans, we’ve been trained to all the noises except those that are most important. Really listen; chances are, you’ll be asked the same question in return.

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Noise cancelling headphones: If you’re working from home, consider purchasing some high-performance noise canceling headphones. Your concentration is only as good as the noise you’re letting in.

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Tap into the positive voice in your head: Download some meditation apps that help you to hear the good things in life.

You have a spectrum of things you can listen to; focus on the ones that fill your heart and soul.

Advice

The Art of the Apology

By JULIE COLLETT

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Advice We all know as adults how hard it is to admit wrongdoing. But don’t you think that apologizing for that wrongdoing is even worse sometimes? Why is apologizing so hard?! According to PsychologyToday.com, apologizing “requires humility and temporarily reduces one’s self esteem.” For some people, apologizing simply feels too close to humiliation … and no one likes to feel humiliated. Some even see apologizing as a sign of weakness. Sometimes our pride gets in the way of an apology, and other times we may not really be sorry for our behavior, so the apology may not be heartfelt. Regardless of whether you like to do it, learning to apologize is a skill that everyone should know. Let’s find out more about what apologizing can look like for our children.

As parents, we need to understand there is a developmental continuum for apologizing—meaning you need to have the age and stage of your child in mind when teaching apologies. Although very young children can repeat the words “I’m sorry,” they have no actual understanding to accompany the apology. In effect, the exercise is pointless. Parents.com suggests focusing on teaching children 2 and under what the rules are, because by learning them, they will have less to apologize for later. By nature, 2-year-olds do not care or understand how other people are feeling. In this situation, you can simply make an apology for your child and move on. Children ages 3-5 are developmentally all about “me” and have a hard time putting themselves in someone else’s shoes, but parents still need to point out how others might be feeling based on their actions. Around the age of 6, children start to better grasp the idea of right and wrong and how their choices can impact others. They may not jump for joy about apologizing, but the reasoning behind it will sink in a bit more. Older children often have more invested in relationships so are more apt to make amends. They’re also capable of offering other ways to make a situation right, ways young children can’t come up with.

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Apologizing doesn’t come naturally to children, so be available for specific coaching and helping your child find the right words. Children need language and guidance on how to accept an apology too. I can remember a counselor explaining to my first-grade class that when a person apologizes to you, you do not have to say, “That’s okay.” Oftentimes, what happened is not okay. What you can encourage children to say instead is “I accept your apology” or “Thanks for telling me.”

Children take in so much of what they see and hear around them, so remember, we must set the example.

Do not be afraid to apologize to your own children. This both sets a good example and shows kids that making mistakes is part of being human—and it shows kids how to handle it when they do. Katie, an Overland Park mom, says, “I think teaching children the art of apology comes from modeling it yourself. If I say something to hurt my children's feelings or raise my voice if my son is not behaving, I always go back later and apologize to my child. It is important to show vulnerability and admit to your child that you have made a mistake.

Apologizing teaches your child to take responsibility for their actions and also models empathy by realizing you hurt someone and need to make it right.”

When it comes to helping children learn to apologize, parents must remain patient and committed because it is a gradual learning experience that will take time.

Rome wasn’t built in a day … and staying the course will only add to the amazing little (or big!) person you are raising!

Organize Do You *Really* Need To Rake Up Leaves?

Why you should switch up your fall yardwork routine.

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Organize Fall used to be the time for articles about which rakes to use and how to protect your back as you gather all the leaves on your lawn and send them to the curb. But over the last few years, there’s been a shift. What if you knew that you didn’t have to rake up and bag all those leaves? These days, organizations from the Nature Conservancy of Canada to the Audubon Society are recommending that you leave your leaves.

Find out why it’s beneficial to have a more laissez-faire attitude towards raking in your yard—and what you need to do to keep your neighbours happy.

Why are gardeners being told not to rake up their leaves?

So, wait—if I don’t rake my leaves, what should I do with them instead?

Leaves offer free nutrients to your lawn and garden as they break down into healthy organic matter for the soil, so there are lots of uses for them that benefit the soil on your property.

It’s important to note that in most cases you can’t just leave the leaves where they fall and call it a day. However, your property’s leaves can be put to very good use in multiple areas—and they can even be saved for later. One great use for them is as mulch: “A great tip for using leaves is around plants in late fall,” says McKeown. “Our winters now are causing trees, shrubs and perennials to become weakened in our gardens. I spend time in late fall putting a large amount of leaves over my favourite plants, to help insulate them for any winter thawing conditions. Leaves piled around roots will help maintain a more even soil temperature, which helps plants survive where alternating periods of freezing and thawing don’t provide consistent snow cover.” In the spring, when you tidy up your garden, you’ll want to clear some away from the plants if they haven’t broken down. You can spread the mulch around the soil, or move them to your compost pile to break down even further.

“We call leaves Mother Nature’s gold,” says Karen McKeown, a horticulturist and the Outdoor Water Efficiency Program Coordinator for the City of Guelph.

“Residents reach out to us for advice on how to have lowmaintenance, water efficient and cost-saving lawns and gardens.” This means educating homeowners on why it’s a good idea to keep the leaves and emphasizing their role in building your soil. “Healthy soils make healthier plants that are more low-maintenance and need less water to survive,” she says.

Leaves can also provide shelter on your property for beneficial insects and amphibians over the winter, and help birds by creating a place to forage for food in cold weather.

Besides being used as a winter mulch, leaves can be used to keep the weeds down in spring, summer and fall. Run them over with the lawnmower in the fall to break them up into tinier pieces to spread throughout your edible and ornamental gardens. You can also leave those bits in the grass. “The leaves will settle into any bare spots in the lawn, which will help stop weeds from germinating and add nutrients to your soil for the lawn to grow better,” says McKeown who recommends mowing the leaves when they are dry. (The small pieces should break down over the winter.)

Leaves can also be turned into DIY compost. If you have the space, McKeown recommends setting up an area in your yard to store them, perhaps in a chicken-wire cage or a protected corner where the wind can’t reach them. “In just a year, your leaf pile will break down a lot and be reduced to a fraction of its original size. When you need some compost, dig down to the bottom of the pile for some great material,” she says.

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Organize

What if you have, say, a giant maple tree? Do you really want to leave thick mats of leaves on the lawn?

How can you tell if a tree’s leaves are diseased? Can they be left on the lawn?

Big heavy piles of leaves will smother the grass, which is great if you want to create a new garden area. Simply rake a layer over your proposed site, and it will be ready come spring. Otherwise, give them a good mow to cut them up into tiny pieces, as mentioned above.

If you see big black polka dots on your maple leaves, you’re looking at tar spot, a fungal disease that doesn’t really harm the tree, but that you want to avoid spreading.

Those leaves should be cleaned up and not saved for the garden. Composting them is not recommended, as most home compost piles don’t generate enough heat to kill the spores.

Landscape designer Candy Venning of Venni Gardens has several huge maples on her property, but no grass. That means she can allow leaves to be left where they fall in the garden to break down over the winter. “We also tend to stockpile some and invite people to help themselves to free mulch in fall or spring,” she says.

McKeown says it can be hard to clean up every single leaf, so a good approach is to try to keep the plant as healthy as possible so that it can fight infections. “Water, prune and fertilize properly to keep the tree in good health, so that it can withstand these disease and pest attacks,” she says.

What should you tell your neighbours who think your leaves are just going to blow into their yard?

Do I need to keep ALL the leaves from my tree?

You may find this modern approach to fall cleanup isn’t universally accepted. There will still be those who want to adhere to their annual routine. And that’s okay—if they’re sending their leaves to the curb, in many Canadian municipalities they’re going somewhere to be composted!

However, if you keep them, McKeown offers a few tips to try and appease your neighbours:

McKeown says she’ll put leaves into an old garage container and then use her weed whacker to chop them all up. Those wee pieces will be put in the garden in the spring. “It makes a great, free mulch, especially for my vegetable garden,” she says.

• Wet down the leaves when you rake them into your garden—or put them all in a pile and cover with a tarp.

• Mow them a few times to make the pieces really small.

• Rake the leaves onto your driveway or a tarp and mow them, then rake up the pieces into your garden or into a container.

If you think you’ll have a use for them, then yes! However if you want to scoop the ones you don’t need into a yard bag and send them to the curb, that’s okay, too.

Are there any other plants you can leave be until spring? And should you clear them up then?

You can further extend your yard maintenance break in the fall by saving your plant-cleanup to-dos for late spring (end of May). As McKeown explains, beneficial and pollinating insects overwinter in plant stems and plant debris on the ground and do not emerge until it is warm enough for them.

“Previous years’ leaves and plant stems will help fertilize your soils and make the soil healthier, which results in less water needed to keep plants healthy,” she adds. “Healthy soils can also hold water longer for plant use.” (Seed heads left on perennials can also offer food for birds.)

Aside from any root or cool-season crops, like carrots, beets and kale, that are still in the ground, you should, however, clean up your veggie garden, sending spent tomato plants, cucumbers, etc. to the compost.

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October 2020 - Family Life

Organize

LITTLE PLAYROOMS Calming the chaos of all those toys might be easier than you think—we asked an expert to share her tips.

By SIMONE OLIVERO

Tired of craft supplies on your kitchen table and action figures underfoot? Rebecca Simon of Toronto-based kids interior design firm Maison Ellie shares her tips for finally getting that playroom organized.

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Organize

1. Purge and sort

2. Create designated areas

Studies show that a less-is-more approach to toys encourages autonomous play and creativity. Make time to purge—I do this four times a year! You can include kids in the process, letting them help decide which toys they’ve outgrown that can be donated to a local charity or school.

Once you’ve cut the bulk, sort and organize what you’ve opted to keep. This will help you assess how each type of toy should be stored. For example, smaller figurines in a small clear bin and larger trucks in a floor bin with a lid.

Every toy should have a home to return to. When the whole family knows where each toy goes, it makes cleanup time a breeze.

A playroom will function best when it’s broken up into individual zones, so take the time to plan everything out.

Creating purposeful areas within a playroom or your living space will encourage your child to play more independently and for longer periods of time. Not sure what the zones should be? Think about what your kid is interested in, such as Lego, reading, or arts and crafts, and make a specific space for it.

3. Pick storage that works Closed storage is great for maintaining order in any space.

Labelled see-through bins that are stackable are a fantastic option for toys you want to be easily visible and accessible. If space is limited, make use of a smaller shelving unit or tall bookcase and fill it with little open baskets and bins.

4. Personalize the space Showcasing your kid’s artwork will make the space feel like their own. Create a framed gallery wall or string a curtain wire across one side of the room to hang masterpieces that can be easily rotated.

5. Be cohesive with your decor pieces Playrooms are already filled with tons of toys, so be selective in choosing additional decor pieces. I like to add impact with wallpaper or decals on a feature wall. Textiles, like throws, area rugs or fun cushions and pillows, help create a comfortable and cozy space where kids will love to hang out.

1. Wooden kitchen, $120, cocovillage.ca 2. Kid’s table and cricket stools, $399, threepears.ca 3. Moroccan Diamonds rug, from $224, potterybarnkids.ca 4. Tiger pillow, $49, crateandkids.ca 5. Storage basket with lid, $30, hm.com 6.

Bloomingville White Cloud Pillow with Eyelashes, $34, amazon.ca 7. Blue Ochre Ivory flag bunting banner, from $38, minilogie.com 8. Trofast toy storage, $99, ikea.ca

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“If you think about a Thanksgiving dinner, it’s really like making a large chicken.” – Ina Garten, Food Network's Barefoot Contessa Family Life ‐ October 2020

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10 things your kid should know how to do before kindergarten starts Illustrations By MEAGS FITZGERALD

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Congratulations! Your little one is starting school in the fall. And even though you know this day has been coming for a while, it’s normal to feel a little anxious about whether they’re ready— especially with everything going on this year. Here’s a checklist of things most kids starting school should be able to do (and some things you may want to work on over the next few weeks.)

1. Get dressed

6. Letters and numbers

By now, kids should be able to pick out weatherappropriate clothes and put on shoes, boots, coats and other gear for going outside without assistance.

More than just singing the ABCs, your kindergartener should recognize different letters and some simple words.

They should be able to count and do basic math, like “I ate one of the five Cheerios, so now there are only four left.”

2. Drop their nap Say bye-bye to that midday snooze. Your kids will need to have a solid sleep routine established so they don’t tire out by lunch.

3. Bathroom skills While some classes have toilets in the room, kids will still need to know how to go to the washroom on their own— this includes knowing how to wipe their bum and properly wash their hands.

4. Name recognition

7. Shapes Before kindergarten, kids should be able to identify basic shapes, like a circle, square, triangle and rectangle.

8. Fine motor skills Your kids should do things like trace, colour and use kidfriendly scissors.

9. Story time

Can your kid spot their name? While most kindergarteners still aren’t able to read, they should be able to identify the letters of their name so they can find things like their cubby, artwork and personal belongings.

Can your kid sit still and pay attention when you read them a book? Do they understand the concept of stories having a beginning, middle and end? At this age, they should understand the proper way to hold a book and how to turn the pages—and that it’s the words that tell the story, not just the images.

5. Lunchtime

10. Independent play

When you’re shopping for lunch gear, make sure you pick containers your kid can open and close on their own. They should also be able to properly feed themselves with utensils.

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Unlike with daycare, ratios are bigger in kindergarten, so kids should be able to play on their own without constant support and attention.

Homework Help

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Whether your kid will learn in person or from home this school year, they’ll inevitably have homework. But how much is too much? Should you help your kids with it? What happens if they can’t get it done? Here are answers to your most pressing homework queries.

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Raise your hand if supporting your kids over four months of distance learning earlier this year showed you sides of them you’d never seen before. “One positive thing a lot of parents told me is they now know much more about their kids—their strengths and weaknesses, as well as their attention span and perseverance,” says Lisa Kaul, senior vice-president at Kumon Canada, an educational enrichment company with centres across the country.

These insights are helpful, but even after playing teacher for a few months, parents still have a lot of questions about how to best support their kids’ at-home learning.

This school year could look different, depending on where you live and your personal decisions. But whether your child spends every day in class or is distance learning (part time or full time), they’ll inevitably have some work to do at home, be it traditional homework or projects assigned after Zoom school. Here are some answers to your biggest homework questions. Parents, take notes.

Q:How much homework should kids be doing?

A: Homework guidelines vary across the country and between school boards. The Toronto District School Board, for one, recommends homework for elementary students after a day spent in class but doesn’t prescribe a set amount of time. Other boards are more specific. The Calgary Catholic School District, for example, recommends occasional five- to 10-minute blocks of homework for kids in kindergarten to grade three, and a maximum of 30 minutes per night for students in grades four to six. That said, the amount of homework assigned depends on the teacher more than the school board, says Kaul. And the amount of time it takes depends on your kid.

The types of assignments given also varies by grade level.

In general, kids in kindergarten and grade one tend to get reading assignments (to do with their parents), and by grade four or five, it could be book reports or group presentations that require at-home internet research.

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Q: My kid begs for help with their homework. Should I comply?

A: “In elementary school, parental support should be more about setting students up to do their work successfully rather than actually helping them do the work itself,” says Kaul. Put otherwise: Parents will need to organize their kid’s homework, at least to some degree, but doesn’t mean you have to sit with them the whole time or correct their work.

In fact, Amal Boultif, a professor in the faculty of education at the University of Ottawa, says to leave the corrections to their teacher so they get a sense of how your kid is really doing. It means you need to make sure your kid is organized with their assignment, ensure they’ve read it clearly and know what to do. By around grade two, in most cases, you should be able to do this and then walk away for 10 or 15 minutes while they work, checking in from time to time to see if they’re still on track. If they have a question that you aren’t sure about it, simply say, “I don’t know. Let’s make sure you ask your teacher tomorrow.” If you try to figure it out or complete the question like you remember from your own schooling, it might create more confusion, since your method could be different than the teacher’s.

Learning responsibility and time management are as important as mastering geography and math. Start giving them the tools early on by empowering them to call some of the shots. Even a first grader can decide whether they work before or after dinner or which book they want to look at for reading time.

Q: If my kid is procrastinating, should I force it or let them deal with the consequences?

A: Little kids will definitely need support, encouragement and frequent reminders to get their work done. This is not a failing on their part. It’s really not until middle school that kids should be taking over their homework entirely, and you shouldn’t feel the need to ensure that each assignment is done (although a quick reminder doesn’t hurt). “The goal is to gradually release the responsibility of learning to our kids,” says Boultif.

If you are struggling to support your kid with their school work at home—due to a hectic work schedule, the demands of your other kids or for any other reason—your family might benefit from the help of a tutor (if that’s an option for you). “Tutoring isn’t just for helping kids who are falling behind,” says Kaul. Some parents hire a tutor to help tackle projects and prioritize assignments to give their kids extra support.

Q: My kid insists on doing homework in the living room with their noisy siblings around. Is this a bad idea?

A: It depends on your child. For some, having a quiet, dedicated spot where they always go to work can help encourage good study habits. But other kids are as productive on the sofa or in the kitchen, and they may not feel comfortable being alone in their room, says Boultif.

You don’t need to be rigid here. There’s nothing wrong with having your kid work at the kitchen counter while you make dinner so you can keep an eye on them while cooking and maybe watch younger siblings, too. The main thing is that they are relaxed and aren’t struggling to concentrate on the task at hand.

Q: My kid’s teacher says she doesn’t believe in homework. What’s up with that?

A: Some teachers don’t, and kids are usually pretty game to go along with it (unsurprisingly!). Truthfully, there’s scant research to prove homework is essential to a kid’s overall academic success. But as kids head into grades three and four, there could be a long-term benefit to helping them create a predictable homework routine, since the workload will increase dramatically in the higher grades, says Kaul, and it’s good to get kids used to the idea. “At Kumon, we advocate daily homework, or the idea of doing something daily, to establish the expectation and routine,” she says.

So if assignments are really sporadic and you’re concerned, you could consider implementing your own homework schedule.

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Q: What if my kid and I decide there’s just too much?

A: If your kid can’t get it all done, prioritize reading.

“Literacy is the essential skill,” says Boultif. “First kids read to understand, then they read to learn math, science and all other subjects, so it’s really the most important in the elementary grades,” she says. You can help them establish a strong foundation by always reading to them at bedtime, encouraging them to read to you, and also by asking them questions about the materials they’re reading, to gauge comprehension.

Q: Do little kids really need a laptop or a tablet for homework?

A: When COVID-19 first arrived, many parents had to take stock of their child’s access to, and relationship with, technology. Clearly, to participate in a live video class from home, they need to be online with a computer or an iPad (along with an internet connection). In the younger grades, parents often have control over how much learning and homework happens online. Many assignments can be done with a pencil and paper, and you can often opt in, or out, of online math games or reading apps, which is helpful if you have two or three kids sharing a computer or tablet for school work.

Q: Can we opt out of homework?

A: Consider your motivation. Are you thinking of scrapping it because of the demands of a hectic home life? Because you don’t personally think it’s worthwhile? Because your kid is struggling with the workload or the work itself? If your student is consistently complaining about the work, start by having a straight talk with your teacher. Maybe the difficulty level needs to be adjusted for your kid’s pace of learning or they simply can’t handle the load right now.

Either way, you and the teacher can likely arrive at a compromise, like swapping math worksheets for increased reading time at home, for example.

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Q: My kid complains about homework. Every. Single.

Day. Will this ever end?

A: Kids moaning and groaning about school work is a tale as old as time. How you react is the key. “This idea that homework is something that has to be endured is such a missed opportunity,” says Kaul. “Making it positive will help them later on—and us, as parents, when we don’t have to go to battle about homework every night.”

Food

Thanksgiving Feast Gather your family and friends and flex your cooking skills on one, or all, of these delicious holiday recipes.

Photography by MAYA VISNYEI

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Giving Thanks

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Gather your family and friends and flex your cooking skills on one, or all, of these delicious holiday recipes.

Photography by MAYA VISNYEI

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Roasted Squash and Coconut Soup

Roasted Beet and Apple Salad

Pan-Roasted Brussels Sprouts and Parsnips

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Make-Ahead Mashed Potatoes

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TripleCranberry Maple Compote

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Rustic Kale and Bacon Stuffing

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Lemon-Thyme Roasted Turkey with Cider Gravy

Mini Pumpkin Pie Tarts

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Food

Roasted Squash and Coconut Soup

Roasted Beet and Apple Salad

PREP TIME:10 MINS

PREP TIME:10 MINS

1 1/2 kg butternut squash , halved lengthwise, seeded 3 tbsp unsalted butter 1 1/2 cups chopped onion 1 tbsp chopped garlic 1 tbsp chopped ginger 6 cups sodium-free chicken broth 1 400-mL can coconut milk 1/2 tsp salt 2 tbsp maple syrup , mixed with 1/4 tsp chili oil

2 cups flaked hazelnuts , (filberts) 1 lb. beets 1/3 cup olive oil , divided 1/4 cup white balsamic vinegar , divided 1 tbsp finely chopped shallots 1/2 tsp honey 1/2 tsp salt 1/4 tsp coarse black pepper 6 cups torn crisp lettuce , such as romaine or little gem 2 Pink Lady apples , quartered, cored and thinly sliced 1/2 cup flat-leaf parsley

1. Preheat oven to 425F. 2. Line a rimmed baking sheet with aluminum foil. Place squash on baking sheet cut-side down and roast for 50 min, or until cut side is browned and squash is tender when pierced with a fork.

3. Let cool slightly, then use a spoon to scoop out all the flesh. Set aside.

4. Heat butter in a large pot on medium-high. Add onion and sauté, stirring for 5 min, or until onion is lightly browned. Add garlic and ginger and sauté 1 min longer.

5. Add squash and stir to combine.

Add chicken stock and coconut milk and bring to a boil. Turn heat to medium-low and simmer gently for 10 min.

6. Purée soup with an immersion blender until completely smooth.

Season with salt. Drizzle servings with about 1⁄4 tsp maple chili oil.

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1. Preheat oven to 350F. 2. Place hazelnuts on a baking sheet in a single layer and bake for 8 min, or until lightly toasted. Set aside.

3. Turn oven up to 425F. Place beets on a sheet of aluminum foil, drizzle with 1 tbsp olive oil, then fold foil over top and pinch ends together to fully enclose. Bake for 50 min to 1 hr,or until tender when pierced with a fork. Let cool to room temperature.

4. Trim stem end and rub skins from cooled beets. Cut into thin wedges and sprinkle with 1 tbsp vinegar.

Set aside.

5. Combine remaining 3 tbsp balsamic vinegar, shallot, honey, salt and pepper in a small bowl and whisk in remaining 5 tbsp olive oil.

6. Combine lettuce, apples and parsley in a serving bowl; drizzle with dressing. Add sliced beets and sprinkle with toasted hazelnuts

Pan-Roasted Parsnips and Brussels Sprouts PREP TIME:10 MINS 3 tbsp unsalted butter , divided 3 tbsp olive oil , divided 3 small red onions , quartered through the root 1 lb. Brussels sprouts , ends trimmed, halved, large leaves peeled and reserved 1 tsp salt , divided 1 lb. thin parsnips , peeled and cut into 2-in. sticks 3/4 cup sodium-free chicken broth 2 tsp honey 1 tbsp chopped garlic 1 tbsp chopped thyme 2 tsp lemon juice 1. Heat 1 tbsp each butter and oil in a large frying pan on medium-high.

2. Add onions and sauté for 4 min, or until tender and lightly browned.

Remove from pan and set aside.

3. Add 1 tbsp oil, Brussels sprouts and reserved leaves and 1/4 tsp salt to pan and sauté for 2 min, or until browned. Cover pan, shaking occasionally for 2 min, or until softened. Remove from pan and set aside.

4. Add 1 tbsp each oil and butter to pan with parsnips, and sauté for 2 min or until browned. Add chicken stock, honey, garlic, thyme, lemon juice and remaining 1 tbsp butter, turn heat to high, cover and simmer 2 min until parsnips are tender and lightly glazed.

5. Return sprouts and onions to pan, season with remaining 3/4 tsp salt.

Food

Make-Ahead Mashed Potatoes

Rustic Kale and Bacon Stuffing

PREP TIME:10 MINS

PREP TIME:15 MINS

4 lb. Yukon Gold potatoes , peeled, quartered 1/3 cup unsalted butter 1 tsp salt 1 cup sour cream 1 tsp smoked or regular ground paprika 1 green onion , finely chopped

1 loaf Italian bread , (about 400 g) 3 tbsp unsalted butter , divided 170 g double-smoked bacon , chopped (about 1 cup packed) 1 cup chopped onion 1 large tart apple , peeled, cored and diced (about 1 3/4 cups) 1 tbsp chopped garlic 1/2 tsp hot-pepper flakes 1 bunch kale , stems and mid-rib removed, coarsely chopped (about 8 cups packed) 1/4 cup chopped parsley 1 tbsp chopped rosemary 1 1/4 cups sodium-free chicken broth

1. Preheat oven to 400F. 2. Place potatoes in a pot with enough cold, salted water to cover.

Bring to a boil over high heat and cook for 15 min, or until potatoes are tender when pierced with a fork.

3. Drain and return potatoes in pot to the stove over low heat for 2 min to evaporate any excess water.

4. Add butter and salt and mash with a potato masher until smooth. Add sour cream and stir to incorporate.

5. Scrape potatoes into a buttered 8 x 10-in. casserole dish and use the back of a spoon to smooth top.

Sprinkle with paprika. Cover and bake for 30 min or until top has begun to brown and potatoes are heated through. Sprinkle with green onion just before serving.

1. Preheat oven to 400F. 2. Use a serrated knife to trim most of the crust from the outside of loaf, then cut into 3⁄4-in. cubes (you should have about 14 cups).

Place bread on a baking sheet in a single layer and bake for 15 min, tossing occasionally, or until dry and lightly toasted. Set aside to cool.

3. Melt 1 tbsp butter in a large frying pan on medium heat. Add bacon and sauté for 3 min, or until fat has rendered. Add onion and apple and sauté for 2 min to soften. Add garlic and chili flakes and sauté 1 min longer.

4. Turn heat to high and add kale to pan in batches, sautéing for 3 min, or until wilted. Remove from heat.

5. In a large bowl, combine toasted PREP TIME:5 MINS bread with kale mixture, parsley and rosemary, and add enough 3 cups fresh or frozen cranberries chicken stock to soften bread 3/4 cup cranberry juice , (100% juice slightly. blend) 6. Use 1 tbsp butter to grease an 8 x 1/2 cup dried cranberries 10-in. casserole dish. Transfer 1/2 cup maple syrup dressing into pan in an even layer and dot with remaining 1 tbsp 1. Combine fresh or frozen cranberries butter. and cranberry juice in a heavy pot over 7. Bake for 30 min or until dressing is medium heat. Cover and cook for 4 heated through and top is crispy. min, or until cranberries have begun to split open.

2. Add dried cranberries and maple syrup and cook, stirring, for 5 min, or until compote has thickened

Triple-Cranberry and Maple Compote

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Food

Lemon-Thyme Roasted Turkey with Cider Gravy PREP TIME:10 MINS 1 14 lb. fresh or defrosted turkey , at room temperature 1/4 cup unsalted butter , softened 1 tsp lemon zest 1 tsp chopped thyme , plus a few sprigs 1 tsp chopped marjoram , plus a few sprigs 1 1/2 tsp salt 1 tsp coarse black pepper 1 lemon , pierced all over with a skewer 1 onion , quartered Cider gravy 1 cup unsweetened apple cider 3 tbsp all-purpose flour 2 cups sodium-free chicken broth , divided 1 cup turkey juices , mostly defatted 1-2 tsp low-sodium soy sauce , optional 1. Preheat oven to 325F. 2. Pat turkey dry. Tuck wings under turkey and tie legs together with kitchen twine.

3. Combine butter, lemon zest, 1 tsp each thyme and marjoram and spread all over turkey and under the skin on the breast.

4. Season turkey all over with salt and pepper. Tuck lemon, onion, and extra sprigs of thyme and marjoram inside the cavity. Place turkey on a rack inside a roasting pan, cover with a sheet of parchment paper and then cover pan tightly with aluminum foil. Roast for 2 hrs, 45 min.

5. Remove foil and parchment paper, turn oven to 425F and roast for 45 min or until skin is golden brown and a meat thermometer inserted into the thigh reads 170F. 6. Remove turkey to a carving board.

Cover loosely with foil and let rest 30 min. Drain pan juices into a gravy separator or measuring cup and spoon off most of fat.

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7. Straddle roasting pan over two burners set to medium-high. Add cider and bring to a boil, scraping up any bits stuck to the bottom of the pan. Simmer for 4 min, or until reduced by half.

8. Whisk flour with 1⁄4 cup chicken stock and set aside. Add remaining chicken stock and turkey juices to pan and bring to a boil.

9. Whisk in reserved flour mixture and boil for 2 min, or until thickened. Add soy sauce to taste and let simmer 4 min. Carve turkey and serve with cider gravy.

Mini Pumpkin Pie Tarts PREP TIME:20 MINS 2 cups all-purpose flour 1/2 cup sugar 1/2 tsp salt 3/4 cups unsalted butter , cut into pieces 1 egg yolk Filling 1 1/4 cups canned pumpkin 1/3 cup sugar 1/2 tsp salt 2 tbsp packed dark brown sugar 3/4 tsp cinnamon 1/2 tsp ground ginger 1/2 tsp ground nutmeg 1/4 tsp ground cloves 2 eggs 3/4 cup 35% whipping cream

Food 1. Preheat oven to 350F. 2. Combine flour, sugar and salt in a bowl and stir until blended. Add butter and work with your fingers or a pastry cutter until butter is the size of small peas. Add egg yolk and work with your fingers until dough begins to come together. Knead dough in bowl until it becomes a ball.

3. Transfer to counter, shape into a thick and uniform rope of dough and cut into 12 equal pieces. Flatten each piece with your fingers, transfer to a well of a muffin tin and press with your fingers to fill the muffin well with an even layer that comes all the way up the sides.

4. Combine pumpkin, sugars, salt and spices in a bowl. Add eggs and whisk until uniform. Add whipping cream and whisk until fully combined. Transfer to a liquid measuring cup. Pour filling into prepared shells until almost full.

5. Bake 28 to 30 min, or until filling is set and edges of crust are golden.

Cool completely in pan then run a knife around the tart edges to loosen, gently tip pan on its side, and use knife as a lever to remove tarts.

A few Thanksgiving Questions What do you know about Thanksgiving?

Do you celebrate Thanksgiving in your country?

What foods are associated with Thanksgiving?

What is your favorite Thanksgiving food?

Did You Know?

The Pilgrims celebrated their first successful harvest in the fall of 1621 by firing guns and cannons in Plymouth, Massachusetts. The noise alarmed ancestors of the contemporary Wampanoag Nation who went to investigate.

That's how native people came to be present at the first Thanksgiving, says Ramona Peters, historic preservation officer of the Mashpee Wampanoag Tribe, which suggests that paintings depicting Native Americans sitting down for a bountiful and harmonious meal with colonial families is basically a lie.

What was actually eaten at that first Thanksgiving is far different from the turkey, mashed potatoes and stuffing that grace many holiday tables today, according to experts at Plimoth Plantation, a living history museum in Plymouth, Massachusetts.

Who cooks Thanksgiving dinner in your home?

How do you cook the turkey?

What time do you start eating?

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Last Look My family, who has always been there, and my experiences.

-Evelyn Krasnik, Chicago, IL

My family all woke up together, at home, this morning. ❤ -Jennifer Field, Alexandria, VA For the Peace, which exists in some countries, to be a world wide reality.

-Marlene M. Moon, Asheville, NC

A “happy songs” playlist on the YT Music App. I was near tears.

-Ima Maia, Seattle, WA

Thankful for family and 5th year of “our kidney transplant” -Joe Kalinowski, Greenville, NC

I live in a technologically advanced society.

-Kason Kendall, Bountiful, UT True friends who stay in good and bad times.

-Becky Van Niel, Norton, MA To be alive!

-Gary Marks, Toronto, ON

What are you thankful for?

I’ve been thinking a LOT lately of how grateful I am to be a fluent speaker, reader, and writer of the English language.

-Lauren Collinson, Philadelphia, PA

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Being retired means I am as free as I've ever been. The universe has been kind. The life journey has been easy, and no matter what comes next, it will all be fine and dandy. I won the education lottery by just doing what I like to do. Wow! Thank you, America.

-Carmela Chavez, Albuquerque, NM

On this Auspicious day, as it's janma jayanti (Birth Anniversary) of God Parshvanatha for having such capability to give warm clothes & blanket to such people,who don’t have to wear proper clothes to cover their body in such a cold morning and demanding food for their children in front of jain temple near to my home.

-Caroline Stanfield, Atlanta, GA My connection with and love for animals !

-Adrienna Holland, Vancouver, BC That I know Jesus and I’m born again!!!

-Kayode Ayeni, Toronto, ON I am thankful for the people around me -Daniel Gnow, San Francisco Bay Area