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HEY, HEY LADIES BY CHERI REED-WATTS
Hey ladies! Happy New Year and welcome to 2022! I don’t know about you, but I’ve been tip toeing into this new year being a bit more cautious than last year. I was so relieved to say goodbye to 2020 and welcome 2021 with open arms and excitement. But then, a few days in, 2021 started acting like the guy who suddenly looks at his buddy, wild-eyed and ready to go and says, “Hold my beer!” Oh no, here we go! Just when I thought there may be some kind of relief, or return to normalcy. Then I thought about it some more and laughed to myself. What is it about flipping the calendar to a new year that makes me believe that something is going to change, the world is going to change or I’m going to change suddenly, just like that? If it was that simple and actually worked there wouldn’t be so many people who make those New Year’s resolutions tossing in the towel by February or March. And yet, we all need to believe and hope that things are going to get better, right? Well, my honest answer is I don’t know. While I really hope 2022 is better than the last couple of years, I refuse to sit around and wait and see, because here’s the thing: whether the world, the community, Covid, friends, family, (insert whatever else you like) get better or not, I can choose and commit that I AM GOING TO GET BETTER AND DO BETTER despite what may be going on around me. If I focus on changing outside circumstances to be “right” before I can do anything, chances are it’s never going to happen. 358
ROCHESTER WOMAN ONLINE : JANUARY EDITION 2022
So, what will be your focus for 2022? How about uncovering and becoming more of your beautiful, authentic self?! Sound interesting but don’t know where to start? The good news is you don’t have to search very far. Everything you need is already inside you! You may just need to take time to review your life and where you are right here, right now. If you find yourself feeling like something is missing, you’re not happy, you often wish all or part of your life were different, dissatisfied with your job, relationship, you are questioning or disagreeing with beliefs you were taught, you use drugs/alcohol to cope; these can all be signs that you are not living an authentic life or being your authentic self. What is the authentic self? It is when you fully express your values, beliefs, needs, desires, thoughts and emotions. The key word being YOUR. How many of us spent the first part of our lives expressing what we thought were our values, beliefs, etc.? Or better yet, maybe it wasn’t even a question you thought about. When you were born you were assigned a name, social security number, gender, possibly a religion and you were raised by a family, community, and/or system, all of which told you stories, shared their beliefs, traditions, and norms. Most likely, you took on some of these or they had an influence on you. If all these beliefs, traditions, stories, etc. ring true for you and are a good fit, then chances are you are already on a good path to being your authentic self. But what if they don’t fit; they
don’t feel right for you? For example, maybe you grew up in a family where your parents were doctors and the expectation was you would follow in their footsteps, so you did. Now you have been a doctor for a few years but are unhappy, and your career doesn’t bring you any satisfaction. You would rather open your own business and sell your artwork because that is your passion, what energizes you and brings you joy. What do you do? You could keep doing what you’re doing and go along to get along, or you could start making a plan of how to transition into focusing more on your artwork and opening your own business, which would energize you, fulfill your purpose, ignite your passion, and allow you to live a life of joy and meaning. Staying a doctor is the safer, more familiar route, right? While going for something unfamiliar and riskier can be incredibly scary. Will you let fear stop you? Or will you allow yourself to feel the fear and do it anyway, having faith that if you take steps to live your truth and be your authentic self, that it will work out? Only you can answer that question about any parts of your life that you would like to change or don’t seem to be working for you anymore. Here’s the thing: you can take your time and figure this out one small step at a time. Becoming your authentic self is a journey, a lifelong process, and not something that happens overnight. It’s a continued trip of going within to get closer each day
