SHE HUSTLES TALKS SPECIAL INSERT

Featuring: - THE DIARY OF A FASHIONISTA WITH SHERIDONNA WILSON - CNY RED CARPET

Enjoy

- UNSTOPPABLE WOMAN WITH DR. PAM DENTON

HUGE SPECIAL CREATORS FILM FESTIVAL INSERT

- ALL ACCESS FEATURING SHANELLE BENSON-REID

QUEEN OF ARTS - “QUEENS” COME IN WITH A ROAR

- SO MUCH MORE!

Vanessa Richards FORECASTING THE WEATHER FOR CNY

COVER STORY 16 METEOROLOGIST

VANESSA RICHARDS

oct/nov

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164

v edition { TABLE OF CONTENTS }

REGULARS

108

WOMEN WHO INSPIRE Roberta (Rosie) Hurtado

222

MANIFESTING YOUR TRUE PURPOSE

LITTLE BLACK BUDDHA

228

COACHING WITH KRISTIN B

300

TAMMY’S TIDBITS

ALL ACCESS

278

ENERGY RESET

104

UNSTOPPABLE WOMAN

292

LITTLE BLACK BUDDHA

244

306

SEEING INTO THE FUTURE

LOCAL BUSINESS SPOTLIGHT Scalp NY

QUEEN OF ARTS

288

KARMA SPEAKS

216

WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT IT?

316

TRACY TALKS

152

PLATTER CHATTER

284

ANIMAL CARE SANCTUARY CORNER

232

CNY RED CARPET

234

FROM THE EYES OF A CHILD

238

WHAT TO DO IN UPSTATE

250

A WOMAN’S PERSPECTIVE

252

TEEN TALK

258

SAVON SPEAKS

296

INNER LIGHT

308

TRAVEL WITH AGNESS

322

LOVE FOR WORDS

SPECIAL FEATURES 99

SHE HUSTLES TALKS Fashion Rescue 911 Syracuse Silhouette KL Storyography CNY Gym Centre The Bee Hive Voice of Impact The Grace of Hannah The Role Model Way Craven Beauty

CREATORS FILM FESTIVAL

140

112

NEW YORK AMERICA PAGEANT WINNERS

FASHION & BEAUTY 198

FASHION FORWARD

272

DIARY OF A FASHIONISTA

HEALTH & WELLNESS 210

ASK THE DOCTOR

130

HEALTHY WOMAN Nutrition Fix NY

266

SEXUALLY SPEAKING

312

WELL TRAIL

320

WELLNESS 360

326

MENTALLY THINKING

112

{ FROM THE PUBLISHER }

“The only time your should ever look back is to see how far you have come.”

T T

ON OUR COVER

On the cover of our October/November Edition of Central NY Woman Online we have Spectrum News meteorologist Vanessa Richards photographed in Syracuse by Michal Lepore. Hair by and makeup by

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: OCTOBER/NOVEMBER EDITION 2020

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CONTRIBUTING WRITERS

Kelly Breuer Michelle DiBernardo Kelly Breuer Michal Lepore Laura Marino Charlene Mann Photography Michele Ashlee Kelly Breuer Michelle Dibernardo Shanelle Benson Reid Kelli Lapage Dr. Pam Denton Alana Cahoon Tammy Vreeland Tracy Simone Kristin Bauer-Gross Sonia Conlin Angela McGhee Sheridonna Wilson Bonnie Floyd Ahlia Kitwana Beth Parry Jennafer Kelly Kristin Bauer Gross Jamie Lynn Garner Jarrod Schoomaker Ellen Feldman Beth Lynch Gabby Koenig Jennafer Pascarella Roberta Hurtado Shannon Marie Shannon Fleming Bre Morris

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Network Rochester

Rochester Woman ONLINE is the premier professional woman’s online publication in the greater Rochester area. Our feature articles address major topics that interest local women. Each issue includes articles on health, fashion, fitness, finance, dining, lifestyle and personal perspectives, as well as a spotlight on local area women. The electronic magazines are distributed freely through your favorite app store and will be in your inbox electronically by the first week of every month. The publication is available free of charge. Please feel free to contact publisher Kelly Breuer at 585.727.9120 or you can email us at networkrocqueen@gmail.com. Download our current media kit at www. rochesterwomanonline.com. The magazine is published 12 times a year by Rochester Woman ONLINE. Copyright © 2017 Rochester Woman ONLINE. No part of this magazine may be reproduced or republished without the consent of the publisher. Rochester Woman ONLINE is not responsible for unsolicited submissions, manuscripts, photos or artwork. All such submissions become the property of Rochester Woman ONLINE and will not be returned.

Save the Dat e

Around the Table â€” Food from Your Family Tree

Friday, November 6, 2020 Live at Comedy at the Carlson OR Virtual Gala Experience With Live Emcee Celebrities Scott Spezzano & Sandy Waters Food, music, videos, silent auction, awards, and more Our 2020 Home, Heart & Harmony gala offers a choice of in-person attendance or enjoying the gala virtually from the comfort of your home. During this pandemic, CAP's waiting children are in even greater need of a permanent family. Please support us by attending the gala! Generous sponsorship packages are available. Call (585) 232-5110

childrenawaitingparents.org

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YOU ARE RICHARDS ENOUGH. VANESSA BY NICOLE HEROUX I PHOTOS BY RICHARDS NSP STUDIOI PHOTOS BY MICHAL LEPORE BY MICHELLE DIBERNARDO, STACY MITCH OFWILLIAMS SPECTRUM AND MATT

Meteorologist Vanessa Richards of Spectrum News was born on Groundhog Day in Moravia, NY; studied meteorology at SUNY Oswego, lives and works right here in Central New York (CNY), supports local animal welfare shelters, and teaches the next generation of broadcast meteorologists. It’s fair to say she has devoted her life to not only watching the weather and seasons change here in CNY, but also making the region a better place. We couldn’t think of a better set of reasons for her to be our cover story for Central NY Woman Online. Va n e s s a k n e w weather was her passion at a young age. She was about 10 years old when she watched the movie “Twister,” which she was (and still admittedly is) obsessed with. The tornadoes found in this cinematic classic played a huge role in fueling her desire to become a meteorologist. She fulfilled her dream to see a tornado in person when she spent a few weeks in “Tornado Alley” chasing twisters with her fellow classmates from SUNY Oswego. Richards received her bachelor’s degree in meteorology from SUNY Oswego, graduating 16

alongside only three women that year. When Vanessa began her professional broadcast meteorology career, she was the only female on the team at NBC 3 Action News – now known as CNYCentral. It was her dream to stay in the CNY region, and felt incredibly fortunate to work alongside the very people she grew up watching on the

news. After working at the NBC affiliate in Elmira, NY (WETM-18 News); Vanessa was happy to make her way to YNN – now known as Spectrum News. At that point – 10 years ago – more women were beginning to make inroads into the industry.

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: OCTOBER/NOVEMBER EDITION 2020

At Spectrum News, Vanessa wakes up early to provide Spectrum’s viewers the detailed forecast they need to know as they are about to begin their busy days. She typically spends her days in the weather center preparing the forecast, but you can see her out and about in the area as well covering everything from storm damage, to heavy snowfall, to even just having some fun at local parks or sporting events. The local Spectrum News footprint extends across Central New York, the Southern Tier, Mohawk Valley, and North Country. While Vanessa was always passionate about animal welfare, she became professionally involved in the local animal welfare community three years ago with the launch of her segment on Spectrum News titled “Your New Best Friend.” She and her husband Matt – a former broadcast meteorologist who now works in marketing and communications – currently have four rescue animals themselves, one of which was the first animal to ever be featured on her segment. Over 150 successful adoptions later, Richards continues to host a rotating cast of shelters

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“While the percentage of female meteorologists in general is increasing, as of this writing, only 8% of chief meteorologists at television stations in the United States are female. Richards says the next goal in her career is to become a chief meteorologist. ”

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COVER STORY } } { {SHIFT+CONTROL “She and her husband Matt – a former broadcast meteorologist who now works in marketing and communications – currently have four rescue animals themselves, one of which was the first animal to ever be featured on her segment.”

on her segment including the CNY SPCA, Helping Hounds Dog Rescue, Second Chance Canine Adoption Shelter, Hunter Hollow Bunny Bed and Breakfast, and more. The shelters bring an adoptable pet to be featured on the segment each week in hopes of finding them their forever home.

many meteorologists to provide a weather forecast from her home. While Spectrum’s newsrooms are uniquely set up to produce quality news and weather reports outside the newsroom with four animals running around the house, she’s happy to be back in the studio.

When the COVID-19 global pandemic struck, it fundamentally changed how broadcast meteorologists across the country conducted their forecasts. Vanessa was among the

Richards has also taught for five years as an adjunct professor of broadcast meteorology at SUNY Oswego. She teaches the very class she was a student in 13 years ago when former

WSYR-TV Chief Meteorologist Dave Eichorn was the adjunct professor. The class – which has 20 spots and is open to Sophomores, Juniors, and Seniors – was initially intimidating to Vanessa. However, the three hourlong night class ended up being one of the best things that has ever happened to her. It has afforded her the opportunity to help people start their careers in the competitive – and quite frankly cutthroat – broadcast television industry, even hiring some of them at Spectrum News. It wasn’t

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“While Spectrum’s newsrooms are uniquely set up to produce quality news and weather reports outside the newsroom with four animals running around the house, she’s happy to be back in the studio.”

long ago that former WSTM Morning Meteorologist Chris Brandolino took Vanessa under his wing and helped start her career, so Vanessa feels great fulfillment doing the same for others. A recent example of this can be found in former CNYCentral Meteorologist Molly Matott. Richards found her college demo reel on YouTube, knew she was going to be a superstar, and helped her make the right connections locally to kick start her career at a competitor’s station, nonetheless! One of Vanessa’s career highlights was the opportunity to work with famed TV weatherman Al Roker of NBC’s “Today Show.” Roker – a SUNY Oswego alum himself – re a c h e d o u t t o SUNY Oswego to pitch the idea of him teaching a class similar to Vanessa’s. The college decided to create a new class that he and Vanessa would co-teach, along with former WSYR-TV Anchor turned SUNY Oswego professor Michael Riecke. The trio taught students the ins and outs of the current television industry, and where it is heading. Richards, along with Roker and Riecke, truly feel that the future of news revolves heavily 22

around adapting the presentation to be consumed online and via mobile apps. Al and Vanessa remain in touch to this day. In fact, much to the delight of her students, Roker made a surprise Zoom appearance in Vanessa’s broadcast meteorology class this past semester.

Being from the Finger Lakes, I asked Richards if she has been up to Seneca Falls. She mentioned she loves being close to where the women’s movement started. She found herself in a maledominated business at the start of her career, which in certain regards, remains that way. While the percentage of female meteorologists in general is

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: OCTOBER/NOVEMBER EDITION 2020

increasing, as of this writing, only 8% of chief meteorologists at television stations in the United States are female. Richards says the next goal in her career is to become a chief meteorologist. When Vanessa is not forecasting the weather for CNY and beyond, she can be found hiking, running, or biking. She and her husband find themselves heading to Delmonico’s as their local go-to favorite restaurant, h a v i n g celebrated almost every major life event there. Her favorite getaway is right here in our own backyard – the beautiful Finger Lakes Wine Tr a i l s ! S h e enjoys spending much of her free time with her husband Matt and their small farm of adopted pets: two cats (Fergie and Stewie) and two dogs (Ralph and Sysco). Be sure to watch for Vanessa’s “Weather on the 1s” reports weekday mornings and her “Your New Best Friend” segments every weekend on Spectrum News.

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“It’s fair to say she has devoted her life to not only watching the weather and seasons change here in CNY, but also making the region a better place.”

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YOU AREFILM ENOUGH. CREATORS FESTIVAL BY NICOLEBY HEROUX WILLIAMS I PHOTOS BY NSP STUDIO MICHELLE DIBERNARDO & JAMIE LYNN

Here at Creators Film festival, we recognize how difficult is it to get your creation on platforms where your project can reach the right audience. That is why our festival was founded to support and promote independent short films from all over the world and aim to promote and provide exposure to these films while organizing fun and culturally diverse night of indie cinema for all.

first year, we went worldwide. From the United States, United Kingdom, Belarus, Sweden, Germany, Iran, India, Iraq, Romania, Mexico, Brazil, Ukraine, Portugal, Australia, Canada, Italy and Hong Kong! Although things

A LETTER FROM MY DANCE TEACHER A lady’s sharing about her love to her teacher KINGDOM OF STARS This is a story about distorted ideas, forgiveness and humanity, our desire to be better.

We have a soft spot for movies and films produced in Upstate NY and Western Mass. To help promote and highlight local filmmaking we created special categories reserved just for them. We also want to promote filmmaking from a young age and want to recognize talents still in High School as well as College, and that is why we reserved special categories for those films created by students of BOTH. Our program will reflect the diversity and opportunities within the short film genre, and our goal is to show films that the audience would otherwise have not seen and leave a lasting impact, meanwhile offering the opportunity to network and create new lasting relationships and new opportunities for collaboration among the participants. Creators Film Festival presented by DiBernardo Productions is proud to announce their finalists for 2020 online film festival. With a total of 69 submissions for our

TO P 3 A N I M AT I O N FINALISTS:

did not go as originally planned and we did have to postpone a month due to covid-19 and go online, things are still very successful. We hope you will check out some of these amazing filmmakers from across the globe.

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: OCTOBER/NOVEMBER EDITION 2020

THE L AST PAGE OF SUMMER The film is a period piece which shows the sunny side of the 60s through the eyes of a local Sunshine Pop band who have songs on the radio, but have never broken out of the local scene. This starts out as a “day in the life” view of the band as they prepare for the biggest day of their career (a nationally televised gig at their local fairgrounds). Their carefree antics gradually become overshadowed by the Music Elitists, who are the worst parts of the 1970s personified and will take any measure to rid the world of all things “groovy”. They creep in simultaneously with a literal approaching storm, at first being comically menacing, but giving a more frightening undertone as the film progresses.

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{ SPECIAL FEATURE } “In Their Shoes is a documentary film about a year in the lives of four men whose stories intersect in a Writers Without Margins prison reentry and addiction recovery creative writing program.”

TOP 4 DOCUMENTARY FINALISTS THE BEE FARMERS A short doc profiling a one-of-a-kind program based in the Pacific Northwest that rents bees to residential customers which in turn are used to pollinate farms around the US. IN THEIR SHOES: UNHEARD STORIES OF REENTRY AND RECOVERY

In Their Shoes is a documentary film about a year in the lives of four men whose stories intersect in a Writers Without Margins prison reentry and addiction recovery creative writing program.

Mayor Marty Walsh, Congressman Joe Kennedy III, Sheriff Michael Bellotti, Author Randall Horton, Professor James Pennebaker, Dr. Bertha Madras of Trump’s Commission on the Opiate Crisis, and more.

In these complex portrayals of both hope and heartache, we learn, from their own words, what led each person to commit their crimes, and we witness the challenges of their ongoing stories on the outside, interspersed with interviews and appearances by Boston

James Wahlberg and Wahl St. Productions have signed on for postproduction and distribution.

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: OCTOBER/NOVEMBER EDITION 2020

{ SPECIAL FEATURE } “Samson film discusses Canine joint diseases history, and also gives hope to all pet owner’s with paralyzed dogs.”

SAMSON Category: Documentary Title: Samson Synopsis by: Chandra Vandry Length of film: 66 minutes, 58 seconds Chandra Vandry and her husband William, a couple from Austin Texas are researchers and own a non profit research foundation searching cures for Chronic pain diseases, Traumatic Brain injuries, Eye diseases, and PTSD. Samson documentary gives hope, and deals with Canine paralysis. They are also filmmakers of the award winning documentary, Got pain? Samson Documentary faces the dark issues of paralysis with dogs, and few solutions other than fusion surgery which does not reverse paralysis, main or euthanasia. William and Chandra Vandry faced a challenging issue with their own dog Samson, who had suffered from Canine ‘stroke’, or FCE (fibrocartilaginous embolism). The neurological Veterinarian report read a lesion was localized to the C1-T2 spinal cord segments related to Myelopathy, which is an injury to the spinal cord due to severe compression that may result 36

from trauma, congenital stenosis, degenerative disease or disc herniation. Samson had stage five or full paralysis.

dog’s health. She also discusses how FCE is treated in Veterinary science. Veterinarian neurologist’s diagnosis in the film discussion on Samson’s paralysis was not positive. Ninety-six percent of recurrences developed within 3 years after surgery. Samson film discusses Canine joint diseases history, and also gives hope to all pet owner’s with paralyzed dogs. SOCKEYE SALMON. RED FISH Sockeye Salmon. Red fish Sockeye, a species of wild salmon, is born in Kamchatkan waters and spends its entire life in the Pacific Ocean. Only once does it return to fresh waters - to give offspring, start the circle of life, and die. It is an inexhaustible resource that feeds billions of people on the planet, restored every year! But soon, we may find ourselves facing the unimaginable: humans will exhaust the inexhaustible!

In the film, Chandra speaks about Pottingers cat study, animal nutrition, and cheaper grade dog foods regarding

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: OCTOBER/NOVEMBER EDITION 2020

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{ SHIFT+CONTROL SPECIAL FEATURE }} “Francine, a beautiful woman left her husband and daughter for a more handsome/richer man. At least that’s what she thought.”

TOP 2 FEATURE FILM FINALISTS

outer space by the US “Genesis 1491” space mission.

THE ASTRONAUT OF GOD 1962. An unprecedented quest in

CHANTAGE Francine, a beautiful woman left her husband and daughter for a more

handsome/richer man. At least that’s what she thought. The con man was after her money.

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: OCTOBER/NOVEMBER EDITION 2020

{ SPECIAL FEATURE } “He wrote a letter before committing suicide as his last wish which stated , “ To make the world a better place to live.....AMEN”.

TOP 4 MOVIE POSTER FINALISTS: I WORK AT THE CEMETERY Forgiving the mistakes, learning to love and stop being afraid of life – it is rather difficult to cope with at the cemetery, but it is quite possible. Even though it sometimes seems that the cemetery is not outside, but inside of you. Sasha - a man of about 35 – manager of a firm that installs tombstones at the cemetery. He has a lot of customers, each of whom experiencesv a personal tragedy. However, Sasha is full of cynicism and irony. One day his 14-year-old daughter appears to return her father into her life. Sasha also meets a young business lady who has just buried her son and a lonely old man who has ordered a tombstone for himself. Sasha becomes involved in the struggle for power between the “eminence grise” of the cemetery and the new manager. And in this whirl of personal tragedies and criminal clashes, it gradually becomes clear that Sasha has severe psychological trauma because of what happened in his past. 40

KANKE MENTAL ASYLUM Kanke Mental Asylum was shutdown by the Indian government back in British times due to unethical practices that were followed there The Kanke Mental Asylum is the crumbling husk of a mental institution that was closed due to cruel treatment of its patients, one of whom left a mysterious work of epic scale etched into the plaster of the

walls that imprisoned him. It was started by british officer Mr Wattson in 1918.Perhaps one of the earliest forms of treatment for mental illness, trephination also called trepanation which involved opening of the skull using a bore or even saw. They said removing a small section of skull eased headaches and even cured demonic possession.

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: OCTOBER/NOVEMBER EDITION 2020

Today it stands as a testimony to the inhumane practices once used in mental health. Mr. Wattson promised employment to people and lured them to work at asylum and used his practices to cause them severe mental breakdown, as he wanted to try out his new invented methodology and at same time his asylum to be the biggest in the world. Once upon a time it had a strength of 2000 patients. Government was forced to shut it down due to unethical practices. Mr wattson could not take this loss and hung himself inhis home the same night leaving behind his wife Shikha who was from Tamil Nadu and their new born child and all his research about human Ps y c h i a t r y. He wrote a letter before committing suicide as his last wish which stated, “ To make the world a better place to live.....AMEN”. Now if they find patients enough they are on a quest to reopen the asylum.

CREATORS FILM FESTIVAL

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SHIFT+CONTROL { SPECIAL FEATURE }} “Need is a visual narrative, a psychological thriller exploring the mind of a killer who thinks he got away with it.”

NEED Need is a visual narrative, a psychological thriller exploring the mind of a killer who thinks he got away with it... But blood does not wash away. SUBFERATU

TOP 2 MUSIC VIDEO FINALISTS: GOOD THINGS WILL COME h t t p s : / / w w w. y o u t u b e . c o m / watch?v=1f799lkEHq8&feature=emb_ logo (Preview) This is the story of the water, as it moves through the Earth, nourishing life. This is the story of a healing river finding its true self again, after being freed from impenetrable damming. This is the story of the strong and enduring salmon, as they fight for survival, bringing hope and nourishment into the land. This is the story of a drum, and a song, and a prayer, carried on the back of a woman, on a journey to honor beauty and to discover herself, her strength, her belief and her celebration. This is all of our stories, as we overcome what’s blocking us, and find ourselves once again in the true flow of the great river of life. Exalting, joyful, and gloriously loving of our Mother Earth, this music video is a cry of triumphant gratitude, for healing. THE LAST MACBETH h t t p s : / / w w w. y o u t u b e . c o m / watch?v=geiOrYIp6l4&feature=emb_logo CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: OCTOBER/NOVEMBER EDITION 2020

{{ SPECIAL FEATURE }} SHIFT+CONTROL “We follow Mary in her thoughts and actions as she questions karma, and we are forced to ask ourselves what’s right and what’s wrong, what’s true and what’s fiction.”

ALICE A new proprietary smart home device, ALICE, is always listening to make life easier. When a naive Annabelle searches for romance via a new dating app, she finds an unearthly attractive and peculiar lover. Is luck the matchmaker or is ALICE? CAROL CRAWFORD A struggling young actress is cast in a film by a mysterious production company; as she prepares for her role the character’s fictitious narrative starts to bleed into her reality. 1971 In a small croft on the Swedish countryside, 25-year-old Mary lives in her quiet and self-chosen solitude. On a hot late summer day, her precious silence is disturbed by a knock on the door. It’s Jack, a handsome man in his 30s who needs help with his car. We follow Mary in her thoughts and actions as she questions karma, and we are forced to ask ourselves what’s right and what’s wrong, what’s true and what’s fiction. THE DISTANCED Across time and space, an unlikely romance forms between two star crossed lovers, each trapped in a quantum bubble of isolation. When Manny, a sarcastic video blogger, wakes to find himself in Quantum Isolation, his only companion is Heather, a vibrant single mother who can only communicate via video chat. Through their communications, we see the joy of love in bloom, and despair as that love is tested. Can Manny and Heather make it through this isolation... or will they remain. THE DISTANCED. 44

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SHIFT+CONTROL {{ SPECIAL FEATURE }} “Across time and space, an unlikely romance forms between two star crossed lovers, each trapped in a quantum bubble of isolation.”

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CREATORS FILM FESTIVAL

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{{ SPECIAL FEATURE }} SHIFT+CONTROL “He wrote a letter before committing suicide as his last wish which stated , “ To make the world a better place to live.....AMEN”.

TOP 3 TRAILER FINALISTS THE DISTANCED Across time and space, an unlikely romance forms between two star crossed lovers, each trapped in a quantum bubble of isolation. When Manny, a sarcastic video blogger, wakes to find himself in Quantum Isolation, his only companion is Heather, a vibrant single mother who can only communicate via video chat. Through their communications, we see the joy of love in bloom, and despair as that love is tested. Can Manny and Heather make it through this isolation... or will they remain. THE DISTANCED. THE FIX A man (Marcus) who once had everything, now struggles with addiction, stemming from a tragic loss in his family. His purpose in life dissipates after losing everything important to him. Despite Marcus being so far gone, his best friend (Bobby) is his only hope to salvage 48

what is left. This film raises alcohol / substance abuse, domestic violence and

mental health awareness. “The Fix”, encourages friends and family to do

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: OCTOBER/NOVEMBER EDITION 2020

all they can to help, while their loved one is still alive. PATRICK

A charismatic mortician finds love when he meets David, a shy southern boy attending his grandfather’s funeral. Their brief romance is cut short when Patrick’s old flame tries to rekindle a relationship, and a crowded house party quickly turns violent. Emotionally shattered, David must confront his feelings of betrayal and loss, while also learning to accept his sexual identity and reconcile it with his family’s faith.

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SHIFT+CONTROL {{ SPECIAL FEATURE }} “Through flashbacks we follow the events that led to the accident while in Italy a mysterious epidemic is spreading.”

TOP 3 TRAILERS: MYSTERIA AND THE VILLAGE SPELL In a village where everything seems to be normal, certain tales and fantastic stories are told. A crossroad of stories where monsters, witches, princesses and kings want to mess up the life of Franquelim, who is a young father who does not believe in any of these things. A film that promises to have everything from fantasy, drama, fear, love, comedy, songs and not so easy ending. CHOKER As a girl drops from the sky onto a crowded beach, a mysterious man drives at breakneck speed towards her. CHOKER is a unique narrative take on one of the biggest challenges facing our planet. Due to its ‘no dialogue’ nature, it is a film that we hope will resonate with audiences around the world. We believe that there needs to be more environmentally focused narrative fiction that will both entertain and educate in equal measure. CHOKER will be the first of a number we plan to make here in Cornwall. Each with an unexpected twist. STOP INVASION! A man wakes up stuck inside his car following an accident, near to him lies his wife, unconscious. Through flashbacks we follow the events that led to the accident while in Italy a mysterious epidemic is spreading. There are those who think that it’s happening because of the vaccines, who are ready to swear that it is the fault of a meat-based diet, but until now the most accepted hypothesis is that the disease has started with foreigners. CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: OCTOBER/NOVEMBER EDITION 2020

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“We saw a need in the Rochester’s LGBTQ+ com playing, so we decided to try and do something our showed us the space that is now Roar that we actu the pushing of our husbands

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mmunity and neither of us were ready to stop rselves… it wasn’t until Danny from Photo City ually decided to move forward, and it was from s that we actually did it.”

QUEENS

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DEEDEE DUBOIS BY CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE I PHOTOS BY CHARLENE MANN FORD & MICHELE ASHLEE

Recently Rochester Woman Online got to have some fun with some of the fabulous “Queens” of ROAR Nightclub. From getting to see behind the scenes, to the hysterical conversations and laughs, to chatting about what got them started and keeps them going, we are proud to bring you 4 of Rochester Woman’s favorite Diva’s starting with Roar’s owner and creator and veteran drag queen himself, DeeDee Dubois.

to buy things and such… remember, back then there wasn’t Amazon or the internet for you to order things… it was harder to find the stuff you wanted/ needed to actually look good in drag! Tell us a little about yourself...where did you grow up? married? kids? what type of business are you in? I grew up in Brockport, NY and spent many weekends even further west in

Who is DeeDee Dubois? DeeDee is an outgoing, fun character that doesn’t take things too seriously. How did you come up with your stage name? From the RuPaul Book of Drag! But it’s fitting cause my first name and middle name both start with D’s… and Dubois is French and I have a lot of French in my ancestry! How long have you been performing and how did you get started? I’ve been performing for like 23 years… after coming out at 18 and going to LGBTQ+ establishments my friend group and I started playing with makeup and looks when we’d go out on Saturday nights. It became a fun escape from my week day job. Eventually I started hanging out with some other people that performed and did drag and they helped me learn the tricks of the trade and where 58

Albion with my cousins and family. I loved riding motorcycles and three wheelers (those aren’t even around anymore), I’m the oldest of like 13 cousins on my dad’s side and we were all very close growing up. At the ripe old age of 21 I met my now husband Matt, we lived in the City of Rochester for 12 years, then moved to Irondequoit and we got married in 2013. I always thought I wanted kids, but I actually wanted to be a kid so we never adopted or explored that very seriously. Matt

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and I have had two dogs, Pride, who died at the age of 14, and then we got Buoy and he’s currently 5 years old. Type of business? My professional job is in the HVAC industry, I’ve worked for the same company since I was 19 years old… I do finance and accounting. What is your most favorite performance of all time? My most memorable performances… they’ve changed over the years. It used to be when I was asked to perform at the Miss Gay Rochester pageant… the reason that’s so special is because I’ve never entered the pageant or won any pageant, yet I was still asked to perform, which to be honest, I’m not sure many (if any) have had that honor of performing without having won a title before. The last performance at TILT was pretty memorable and sad… it was exciting to see so many people there, it was a hard last performance for me cause I didn’t know what the future would hold and I had bottled up a lot of emotions and things related to TILT for many years. Now my favorite and most memorable performance would be the opening weekend performances at Roar…. My perspective on stage is totally different now when you are performing at a venue that you co-own and created.

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{ SHIFT+CONTROL QUEEN OF ARTS }} “David and DeeDee are pretty much the same person these days. I used to have two totally separate lives, but since Roar, it’s become pretty much the same!”

If you could take 1 thing you liked best from each of the other cover “Queens” what would it be? Um… well Eva… she doesn’t sweat… like literally she doesn’t and I’m jealous of her for that! HAHA. Deelicious: I’d love to steal her rhythm, no one moves like Deelicious! Vega: I wish I had the drive that she has, always recreating and working on her craft, sometimes it makes me feel lazy. Tell us about ROAR and how it was started... Roar was started c a u s e T I LT kicked us out so they could “change formats” into the “New Tilt” which wasn’t going to have drag, and it was obvious it didn’t care much about the LGBT community. Things didn’t go as planned when the community expressed it’s outrage, and Tilt ended up changing their name and reopening. DJ Mighty Mic and I had worked together for 20+ years at different venues, we’ve always had a mutual respect for each other. We saw a need in the Rochester’s LGBTQ+ community and neither of us were ready to stop playing, so we decided to try and do something ourselves… 62

it wasn’t until Danny from Photo City showed us the space that is now Roar that we actually decided to move forward, and it was from the pushing of our husbands that we actually did it. How long does it take you to get all ready for a performance? If I’m rushing I can get ready in about an hour and 15 minutes, but usually it take about an hour and a half.

What are you like outside of the persona of DeeDee? David and DeeDee are pretty much the same person these days. I used to have two totally separate lives, but since Roar, it’s become pretty much the same! Where do you see yourself, and DeeDee in 3 years? 5 years? Well it’s funny cause 3 years ago I would have never seen me co-owning

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an establishment! So who knows what the future will bring…. I mean 2020 brought us COVID… so I guess I’m just along for the ride… I’m having fun, and proud of what we are doing at Roar. I enjoy my day job and I try and balance it out all with a little personal time with our friends and family. What is one thing that no one really knows about you? Wow… I think I’m kind of an open book, especially these days… up until Roar, not many people knew what I looked like out of drag. Who is your most favorite Drag Queen of all times? It will seem cliché to say this since we both wear a lot of glitter, but I’ve always admired Ambrosia Salad… bright colors, big costumes and always humble and kind. What is your signature song, color, and pose? Signature artists would be Pink and Kesha… signature color, no such thing for me, ALL the colors! Signature pose… that would be my right foot kick and sometimes it appears like I’m performing in a box (it’s hard to explain).

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COVER STORY }} { {SHIFT+CONTROL “Wow… I think I’m kind of an open book, especially these days… up until Roar, not many people knew what I looked like out of drag.”

If there was 1 thing you could do over, what would it be and why? If I could do it all again, I think about 5 years ago I would have started looking at opening my own place… I’m not sure if it would have happened, but having done it now I wish I had done it sooner.bright colors, big costumes and always humble and kind.

What is your signature song, color, and pose? Signature artists would be Pink and Kesha… signature color, no such thing for me, ALL the colors! Signature pose… that would be my right foot kick and sometimes it appears like I’m performing in a box (it’s hard to explain).

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“If I could do it all again, I think about 5 years ago I would have started looking at opening my own place… I’m not sure if it would have happened, but having done it now I wish I had done it sooner.”

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{ QUEEN OF ARTS } “My favorite performances have been when I competed (and eventually won) the Miss Gay Rochester Pageant. The process of preparing for competition is very fulfilling: creating costumes, choreographing, rehearsing with friends and chosen family.”

I know that we discussed that you make a lot of the costumes, how did you get started with that? My first swing at that was in my early days of drag I would purchase things at the thrift stores, and then “Liberace” them. Add feathers, rhinestones, sequins, beads, etc. A few years into our friendship DeeDee gave me an old sewing machine they had found at her husband’s grandma’s basement. “I want you to have this, but you have to make me stuff.” I had 72

never touched a sewing machine in my life, but my drag mother Sabrina Daniels started teaching me, and here we are today making pageant-winning gowns, and drag costumes for performers across the state. What are you like outside of being “Samantha Vega”? I am shy, but outgoing. An extroverted introvert, if you will. Always looking to serve my community in whichever way

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I can. Always looking for new things to learn. Who has been your biggest influence and supporter in your life? My parents absolutely were a big influence in me pursuing an education and being goal-oriented. In their own way they also encouraged me and my siblings to be ourselves. Over the years I will always praise the power of CHOSEN FAMILY. Those not related to me, but

DELAVAN

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QUEEN OF ARTS }} { {SHIFT+CONTROL “Now I am more confident in and out of drag, but Vega is still a different persona who is constantly reinventing herself and not at all like her male alter ego.”

we’ve been there for each other through the years when “true family” was not.

Most people don’t know that I was once married to a woman and had a kid.

Where do you see yourself in 3 years? 5 years? I dont even know where I see myself next week! In all seriousness, I would probably go to school to formalize my background in non-profit management and actually get a paying job in the field.

Who is your most favorite Drag Queen of all times? Erica Andrews(RIP) is to me the perfect blend of theatre, glamour, beauty, dance and sass. She also always celebrated her hispanic heritage. Her legacy has created so many other legendary drag performers. Always an inspiration.

What is one thing that noone really knows about you?

Graduating college. All my worlds came together to celebrate me, my hard work, my struggles and my successes. If you could be another “queen” for a nite who would it be and why? Cher! I would want to experience what that kind of money could buy, the adoration of her fans, and her eternal youth!

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MISS DEELICIOUS BY ROCHESTER WOMAN ONLINE I PHOTOS BY CHARLENE MANN FORD & MICHELE ASHLEE

Who is Miss Deelicious? Miss Deelicious is a festive ball of enrgy, love, fire,glamor, laughter, kindness and an honest pageant “Diva/Queen” who’s rough around the edges, but polished at the same time.

moment. I have had lots of kids through my life that I’ve made for myself, and love them more then they could ever know. Performing and entertainment is my job and still to this day the love of my life.

How long have you been performing and how did you get started? I have been performing for off and on for 16 + years and still truly love everything about it even to this day.

What is your most favorite performance of all time? My favorite perfomance is hard to pick

I got started watching the Queens on stage at the SweetHearts Ball and was pulled up on stage by the owner of Muthers Night Club, Naiome. After she pulled me up on stage and that was it, a monster was born! AFTER THAT ... I did a youth show and then got gigs at the local bars/clubs in town and got welcomed in at GQ night club by Dee Dee Dubois. We have been working together off and on ever since.

just one, but if I had to choose, it would have to be when I perform Beyonce and Pattie Labelle on stage.

Tell us a little about yourself...where did you grow up? married? kids? what type of business are you in outside of performing? I grew up in the suburbs in the Bronx during holidays and summer vacations. I’m not married, but engaged at the

If you could take 1 thing you liked best from each of the other cover “Queens” what would it be? If I could take one thing from each of the amazing Queens that graced along side me for the cover it would be Eva’s resilience, DeeDee’s focus, and Vega’s

intelligence. You seem very outgoing, fun and completely comfortable in who you are in and out of drag... Has that always been the case? In all honesty, yes it has always been the case. I’ve learned in life that it is a choice, and no matter how difficult or hard life gets, or how much that the odds are stacked against you, it’s your choice to not let that break you down and discourage you. Besides, who wouldn’t want to be outgoing, fun and completely comfortable with who they are. It’s your life, enjoy it. You only have one chance. I know that we discussed that you make a lot of your own costumes and also the ones for the other queens, how did you get started with that? Yes, I do make my costumes and even some for other girls. I got into it once one of my favorite entertainers that I has befriended became my seamstress. She relocated so I stepped up to do it myself. Then, I have also ordered a couple of things that I just did not like the way that they fit or it didn’t come out how I wanted to so I asked my seamstress to teach me the basics and I figure it out from there.

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COVER STORY } } { {SHIFT+CONTROL “Miss Deelicious is a festive ball of enrgy, love, fire,glamor, laughter, kindness and an honest pageant “Diva/Queen” who’s rough around the edges, but polished at the same time.”

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COVER STORY } } { { SHIFT+CONTROL “In all honesty, yes it has always been the case. I’ve learned in life that it is a choice, and no matter how difficult or hard life gets, or how much that the odds are stacked against you, it’s your choice to not let that break you down and discourage you.”

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EVA FLOW BY ROCHESTER WOMAN ONLINE I PHOTOS BY CHARLENE MANN FORD & MICHELE ASHLEE

Who is Eva Flow? She is a very humble elegant talented professional artist character What made you become a drag queen? The makeup, lights, theater, the glam, heels, dresses, and of course the crowd. How long have you been performing and how did you get started? Very soon it will be 19 years performing and I started by accident in a theater scene 18 years ago at Francisco oller theater in Bayamón Puerto Rico Puerto Rico. Tell us a little about yourself...where did you grow up? married? kids? what type of business are you in outside of performing? I am a very simple person. I am a humble, sincere Catholic with very strong family values. I love to see the bright side in everything and love to smile, laugh, dance, etc. I grew up in between Honolulu, Hawaii and Puerto Rico. I am not married and do not have any kids. Out side of my character I am a certified cosmetologist and theatrical makeup artist, a teacher, secretary manager and am in retail. I am much more as well, but these are the important things right now. What is your most favorite performance 88

of all time? One of my favorite performances when I was hired by a very famous artist and producer in Puerto Rico was for the closing performance of Las Fiestas De La Calle San Sebastian back in 2010. I was in front of a crowd of more than 3,000 people. It was an amazing experience for my drag career and for me personally.

If you could take 1 thing you liked best from each of the other cover “Queens” what would it be? Lol....well that’s easy. I will take the sassiness, the quirkiness and the humor... just guess from what three of my sisters belongs to! I know you are from a different country, where is it and why did you decide to move here?

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I am originally from the middle of the Pacific Hawaii Honolulu, but mostly raised in Puerto Rico. I decided to move to Rochester, New York because of hurricane Maria back in 2017. You are an amazing artist and have done much of the artwork and murals in ROAR. How did that get started? It’s funny to say I’m a good friend of the owners of Roar and one day we went to see the venue as it was and in front of the owners I told them that I was an artist and I just grabbed a piece of wood and start drawing the logo in front of them.That’s how it all started. They gave me the opportunity to just channel my art into the venue and as a result there’s two murals now. A glow in the dark bar top and a glow-in-the-dark bar edge and I think there may bemuch more to come. What do you do for your day job? I am an ASM assistant store manager. I am proudly part of a cleaning team in charge of receiving deliveries. I am also a makeup artist and cosmetologist/ beauty consultant and a painter as well.

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COVER STORY } } { {SHIFT+CONTROL “I am a very simple person. I am a humble, sincere Catholic with very strong family values. ”

Who has been your biggest influence and supporter in your life? Well this one is a tough question because I don’t have her anymore by my side. My biggest influence and supporter was my mom (RIP) and of course I can’t not mention my brothers. They are my supporters as well, plus my good friends. Love you guys. Where do you see yourself in 3 years? 5 years? Wherever God needs me to be and be useful is where I will be, not only for myself, but for others. Plans are just a thought in your mind that can easily be changed under circumstances. With

that said, I hope I will be on a good path and working as hard as I always have to live the dream. What is one thing that noone really knows about you? That I love to eat LOL... How have things changed from when you started until now? OMG very much because for us female impersonators and drag queens the starting point it’s more as a costume then what we are achieving now in the present day just watch some pictures of us 10 years ago LOL

What is your very favorite memory of performing? Always always always!!! What I remember is it’s the fantasy of the illusion on stage with all the lighting, the song, the makeup, hair, and dress. That wow from the crowd every time we step on stage... love it!! If you could be another “queen” for a nite who would it be and why? Maybe my co-workers will hate me for this answer, but I will gladly be RuPaul for one night... I just love the way she channels drag or female impersonation.

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{ SHIFT+CONTROL } “I am shy, but outgoing. An extroverted introvert, if you will. Always looking to serve my community in whichever way I can. Always looking for new things to learn.” - Samantha Vega

I am shy, but outgoing. An extroverted introvert, if you will. Always looking to serve my community in whichever way I can. Always looking for new things to learn.

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THE C.L.E.A.N. METHOD BY DR SHANELLE BENSON REID I PHOTOS BY MICHAL LEPORE

“We need to welcome all human experiences, from the secretary to the CEO, all stakeholders contribute to overall success of the organization.” Dr. Shanelle R. Benson Reid As we wrestle with high rates of unemployment and underemployment, please consider a complete overhaul of the workplace. Start by creating a new normal; a normal that values all members of the professional and corporate communities. Be proactive about addressing perception, performance and production through diversity, inclusion and equity. Creating environments that focus on the needs of all members of the organization can be a perplexing process that requires broad thinking and deliberate actions; at the very least, these organization must begin buy valuing all representatives and based on this notion, the C.L.E.A.N. Method was created. THE C.L.E.A.N. METHOD The C.L.E.A.N. Corporate Training Method is based on perception, performance and production. The program focuses on a holistic approach to building the corporate community by addressing the needs of all members. Diversity, inclusion and equity are vital to establishing a thriving workplace and building community, especially when it comes to employee engagement and group cohesion. Furthermore, creating equitable environments cultivate

creativity and innovation because team members, from executives to employees bring a variety of backgrounds, experiences and perspectives to the organization. However, environments that embrace diversity, inclusion and equity require comprehensive training and persistent adaptability. When it comes to eliminating discriminatory practices, we tend to focus on leadership, promotions, and hiring practices while

discounting organizational perception, performance and production. Identify the skills, knowledge and experiences each stakeholders needs at every level and determine whether these stakeholders have equal opportunities to meet these needs. Often times, disparities occur or are magnified because 1) individuals do not perceive their thoughts and or ideas are valued, 2) individuals do not have the necessary skills to perform the required task and 3) individuals are ill equipped to meet organizational production

standards. The C.L.E.A.N. Method emphasizes an inclusive approach to building organizations by addressing the needs of all members (C-Level, Leadership, Employee, Apprentice and Novice) from cultural, social and equitable perspectives. CEO (CHIEF EXECUTIVE OFFICER) Chief Executive Officer, the highest-ranking person in a company or organization, is primarily responsible for making major decisions. These individuals select and choose managers and heads of departments as well as observe the organization’s budget and financial activities. The CEO also supervises other activities within the organization in order to identify ways to cut costs and improve programing and productivity in an effort to remain in alignment with the mission and meet or exceed annual goals. The roles of an excellent CEO include but are not limited to, creating strategies, overseeing the leadership team, designing the organization, being the face of the company to external stakeholders, working with the board, and managing their own time and energy. Therefore, when a CEO recognizes her value in the organization, has the aptitude to lead and the ability to complete the required tasks, perception, performance and production are in alignment.

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“We need to welcome all human experiences, from the secretary to the CEO, all stakeholders contribute to overall success of the organization.”

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{ ALL ACCESS } } { SHIFT+CONTROL â€œThe C.L.E.A.N. Corporate Training Method is based on perception, performance and production.â€?

LEADERS The primary duty of a leader is to lead by example. A leader must demonstrate a strong work ethic. Effective leadership impacts the organization as well as the members. Organizational success is heavily dependent on competent leadership. Effective leaders prioritize people over profit and community over individuality. They understand how to maintain motivation without jeopardizing relationships. Leaders are able to build on strengths and address limitations without criticizing efforts. Great leaders connect with their team by facilitating open and honest dialogue, promoting growth and development, and giving and receiving feedback. These individuals are also willing to adjust their leadership style to meet the needs of an ever-evolving organization. Thus, when a leader recognizes her worth in the organization, has enthusiasm to serve and the capacity to foster organizational growth and development, perception, performance and production are in sync. EMPLOYEE Employees are people hired for wages or salary, especially at a nonexecutive level to perform assigned duties. These duties are typically created for tasks completion and skill improvement. Employment roles and expectations are outlined in the employerâ€™s manual and are reviewed and agreed upon when the employment term initiates. There are moral and professional requirements in most organizations that employees must adhere to in order to maintain employment. That being said, individuals are valuable members of the organization and critical to success. The organization 98

cannot function without talented, capable employees. Organization must ensure the needs of the employees are met; from personal to professional, from abilities to deficits, employees must be accepted, understood and respected. Hence, when an employee recognizes his significance in an organization, has the experience to function effectively and the option to develop and advance, perception, performance and production are harmonious. APPRENTICE The duties of an apprentice are to learn how to become specialized in a job by going through training, under the guidance of an experienced employee. A role of an apprentice involves tasks such as adhering to workplace procedures, following health and safety guidance, updating training records, and completing tasks to gain desirable skills and abilities. A good apprentice demonstrates responsibility, reliability and a willingness to operate with other members of the organization. Apprenticeship positions lead to permanent employment and are critical to creating a skilled and diversified employee pool. Apprenticeship programs are charged with adhering to and surpassing the latest industry standards and keeping up-to-date with advancing technologies and innovations in training and human resource development. Apprenticeships help organization develop highly skilled employees. Programs that support apprenticeships also reduce turnover rates, increase productivity and lower the cost of recruitment. Consequently, when an apprentice is viewed as an asset to the organization,

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is coached on the latest advances and innovations and has the tools to fulfill position requirements, perception, performance and production converge. NOVICE A novice is person who is inexperienced or new to a field or situation. A good novice follows the protocols and guidelines given by a potential employer. These individuals understand the importance effective communication, time management, problem solving, team building, work ethic, flexibility, adaptability, motivation, stress management, and confidence. The novice is one of the most important components of the employee ladder. The novice; a skilled person, prepared to embark on new opportunities is vital to organizational success and sustainability. So, when a novice decides to take a leap of faith ad seek new endeavors, she must realize she is a benefit to the organization, she has the skillset to begin her new opportunity, training, growth and development are necessary and it is the duty of the organization to help her be effective, which leads to synergy in perception, performance and production. SUMMARY In conclusion, employers seeking professional development and corporate training typically think in terms of black and white when hearing about the C.L.E.A.N. Method but in actuality, the C.L.E.A.N. Method is a process of addressing cultural responsiveness and social awareness by acknowledging and appreciating the entire, human experience.

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MAKENNA 99

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HOW WE FEEL INSIDE OUR BODIES BY DR. PAM DENTON

Weight loss, body image, how we feel inside of our bodies - it can become a chronic issue and mental drain for many women. Many of us spend our days trying to find solutions for our bodies, jumping from this workout to that, and from diet to diet. Or, we just give up and surrender to living in a body that we don’t feel good about. This causes mental drain and fatigue as we constantly search for the long-term solution to a lifelong issue. The truth is, our bodies and minds simply do not have enough energy to tackle this constant question. When you want to lose weight and feel good inside your body, it is important to know how your body works. Simple as it sounds, breathing is the #1 way for your body to achieve lasting health, weight management, and stress release. In fact, breathing could just be the NEW form of fitness for accomplishing weight loss while eliminating a ton of stress. Designed for everyBODY, Breathing Fitness can be done just about anywhere and at any time. It is the jumpstart you need to find more alternative solutions to your weight management - and it will help you rev up your engines for greater results to your current fitness routine! How does breathing fitness work?

1. We create energy from oxygen. Yes, it’s that simple. Learning how to breathe longer and deeper will help you eliminate the mental and emotional fatigue of searching for the next best diet or fitness routine. By breathing deeply with a conscious practice, you will give your body the

It’s almost so simple that we tend to overlook it. 3. Breathing is the path to detoxification. One of the quickest ways to begin to move the toxins that are holding you in a weight pattern is conscious breathing. Breathing eliminates the need for excess fat cells by getting rid of the bad stuff your body no longer needs. Recovery, Reboot, Reset. This is what we need the most right now. Through a positive fitness regimen of breathing exercises designed for today’s demands, you can COME ALIVE. What happens when you have energy and oxygen to come alive and feel amazing?

energy it needs to make the right decisions.

Well, you lose weight! And when you lose weight, you have more energy. When you have more energy, all those items on your to-do list get checked off and you are the ringmaster of your own show. You are the manifester of wealth and health. You feel great, you look great, and you have the POWER!

2. Breathing is the fastest way to reboot your metabolism! It energizes, metabolizes, and eliminates waste. Breathing consciously and deeply feeds your cells the energy they need to renew and re-energize by eliminating waste and stoking your metabolic fire.

Breathing fitness is not about achieving “perfection” but rather empowering your health and weight management so you can do amazing things in your life - no matter what is going on out there. Your journey begins with #onebreathstronger. You can

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do amazing things in your life no matter what is going on out there. Your journey begins with #onebreathstronger. You can win in this life and embody amazing vitality, even when it seems the world has been turned upside down. Youâ€™ve got this! Weâ€™ve got this!

Every cell in your body wants to dance and be happy! Breathing Fitness will detoxify your cellular body and it is as SIMPLE as it sounds, with breathing exercises, intentional movements, plus nutritional support you can begin to reverse the effects that stress has on your body. Put on the oxygen mask with us and take a deep breath to

clear out the old and call in the new. Your body will thank you! Join us for a SuperCORE FIT Consultation and Bootcamp and start to be unstoppable! www.supercorefit.com

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ROBERTA (ROSIE) HURTADO BY ROBERTA (ROSIE) HURTADO

I am an Assistant Professor of Latina/o Literature and Culture in the Department of English and Creative Writing at SUNY Oswego. I earned my Ph.D. from the University of Texas-San Antonio. My book came out in 2019, entitled Decolonial Puerto Rican Women’s Writings, and I also have several articles out. I’ve lived in Syracuse since 2015. 1. Where are you from? If not here, what brought you to Upstate? No, I’m not from CNY/Upstate NY. I moved up here from New Orleans, and before that, I was in San Antonio, TX. But I’ve also lived in the Northeast (Massachusetts) and in the UK. I moved up here after being offered a job at Oswego. The English and Creative Writing department created a tenure-track position in the Literary Studies program that focuses on Latina/o Literature and Culture. It was really exciting because the position had not existed before, and I would be able to create so much in terms of curriculum. I earned my Ph.D. in Latina/o Literature, and after that, I had moved to New Orleans to work at an arts academy, where I had constructed the curriculum for the junior level of students. I love being able to create things from scratch, to think through what it means to learn something new from a variety of angles. Oswego offered me the kind of work that I enjoy doing in an environment that appeared to be, and since then has been, really supportive. 2. Where is your favorite place to go in Upstate? I have a couple of places When I first moved up here, I lived downtown and would spend free afternoons going to the Central Public Library. Especially the floor 108

with all the fiction novels. I loved moving through the stacks and then sitting by one of the windows with Syracuse passing by me while I lost myself in reading. I also love going to Chittenango Falls—it’s not as intense as the ones on the finger lakes in terms of the hike, but it’s such a beautiful location. And then…food. How do you not talk about food, right? Haha-I have a couple of places that I think are amazing, but Rise and Shine Diner—the space they just opened up in Wescott—I mean, yeah, that’s where it’s at for breakfast. 3. Who would you want to work within Upstate as a woman that you haven’t? I’ve honestly been really blessed to come across a range of intelligent, compassionate, and dedicated people—specifically women—since moving up here. People who care about their community and want to make Syracuse a better, more equitable space. And these women have been engaged in a wide variety of activities, such as animal/dog rescue, art galleries, youth education, higher education, women’s reproductive rights, and more. I’ve also had the opportunity to meet a lot of wonderful people through the YMCA, as well: before the pandemic, I was a Body Combat instructor at the Southwest YMCA and also took classes there. The environment was so friendly, and the instructors are great at what they do—you never know who you will meet, but every one I got to interact with made my day better. There are organizations that I would like to work with more, such as La Liga (the Spanish Action League), and get to know the women who work there more. I ran a workshop with a grant coordinator at La Liga a few years back, and the students who were there were flat

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out brilliant. The opportunity to talk with them and hear their voices is inspiring. I would look forward to doing that again. 4. What would you tell other women who want to go into your field? Do it! Seriously, Latinas make up a singledigit percentage of tenured/tenure track faculty in the higher education system across the country. Although it varies, it’s usually somewhere around 2-4%. So many brilliant young women have such bad educational experiences early on that it makes it really hard to keep going. If this is their dream, please go after it. And, find good mentors—they are out there. I was beyond fortunate to have great feminist mentors both as an undergraduate student and in graduate school. These women helped me become a better scholar and person. They helped me discover so many things about myself because of their own genuineness. So, I guess, if this is what you want to do, know that you are better than the messages telling you that you cannot do it, and find the people who will have your back, the people who will challenge you to be your best self, the people who believe in you to become your best self. 5. Where can our fans follow you? I have a website, www.robertahurtado.com. You’ll find links for articles, information about classes I teach or have taught, and information about my book. There’s also a link where people can contact me.

“If they didn’t want us to talk about it, they never should have done it.”

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MRS. NEW YORK AMERICA 2020 PHOTOS BY GOOD KNEWS PHOTOGRPAHY & KING PHOTOGRAPHY

YASMEEN GUMBSBREAKENRIDGE Yasmeen Gumbs-Breakenridge is a Corporate Attorney, admitted to the New York State Bar, United States District Courts for the Southern and Eastern Districts of New York. Yasmeen is an advocate for academic and professional development programs for children and young adults who are experiencing economic hardships or homeless, the Victoria’s Voice Foundation and she is our Mrs. New York America!

high exposure cases against corporations in court and during mediation. She also volunteers her time as an American Bar Association Law School Division National Appellate Advocacy Competition Judge.

Yasmeen was born on the beautiful island of St. Thomas, United States Virgin Island. At a young age, she relocated from St. Thomas to New York City with her family. Growing up in New York City, Yasmeen developed the grit, which contributed to the hardworking academic achiever, and successful litigator she is today. Beating the odds, she attended college on a Division I Track & Field Scholarship. Yasmeen is a National Collegiate Athletic Association (NCAA) Leadership recipient and Sunbelt Conference Track & Field finalist in the 100-meter dash, 4x200 and 4x400 meter relays. Yasmeen furthered her education by attending law school in Virginia. She was recognized as Who’s Who Among Law School Students, Vice President of the Black Law School Association and winner of the Appellate Advocacy Competition. Yasmeen has defended 110

Yasmeen has partnered with Madison Square Boys & Girls Club, where she serves as a Council Member. “The Madison Square Boys & Girls Club provides after-school and summer youth development programming to young people between the ages of 6-18 in under-resources neighborhoods in New York City.” As a Council Member, she dedicates her time and talents to positively impact the lives of over 5,000 New York City youth. Yasmeen is actively involved in raising awareness; serving as a Madison ambassador, direct contributor and attendee to fundraising events. She is engaged in the direct mentorship of clubhouse activities and a frequent guest speaker reader for the literacy program. Yasmeen also partnered with the Salvation Army of Greater New York for “Camp in a Box” and the “Back-To-School Campaign.” She and her family are active volunteers with Hunters Point Parks Conservancy and New York Cares.

In addition to practicing law, Yasmeen is a published bridal model for Jana Ann Bridal Couture and you can see her modeling during the Knot Couture Show in New York City as well as during New York Fashion Week.

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Through her platform #ConfidenceComesFromWithin, she commits to dedicating her time to serve the great state of New York and the United States Virgin Islands. Sharing her personal story continues to have a direct positive impact on the future of many inner city youths experiencing economic hardships and homelessness. As a result of her commitment to serving the state

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“Yasmeen is an advocate for academic and professional development programs for children and young adults who are experiencing economic hardships or homeless, the Victoria’s Voice Foundation and she is our Mrs. New York America! ”

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{ SPECIAL FEATURE } “As a Council Member, she dedicates her time and talents to positively impact the lives of over 5,000 New York City youth.”

and tremendous impact, the governor has recognized her contribution to the community. Yasmeen feels blessed for the opportunity to serve as Mrs. New York America 2020, because it gave her a larger platform to advocate for a cause that is near to her heart. She

will be competing for the title of Mrs. America 2020 on October 31, 2020. The Mrs. New York America 2021 pageant will be held at the RIT Inn and Conference Center at 2:00pm. To follow Yasmeen’s reign, please visit:

http://mrsnyamerica.com, Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/ mrsnyamerica/, and Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/ mrsnyamerica.

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MRS. NEW YORK AMERICAN MARJORIE VAIL Marjorie Vail is a native of Brooklyn, NY., born to Haitian parents. She is a die hard Brooklynite and New Yorker. Marjorie is a Literacy Coach as well as a licensed Esthetician.

times of a couples’ lives---becoming parents. Sadly, during the delivery of their child, the unspeakable happened… Marjorie and Roman’s son, Aleksei was born still. This tragedy… so unexpected, rocked their worlds. With a lack of resource and support,

In high school, Marjorie was knee deep in school spirit. She was the Mayor of her high school (equivalent of Student Body President), played varsity basketball and softball. She was amongst the leaders in steals in her basketball division, while also making the newspaper several times for scoring. She ultimately was offered a basketball scholarship to play for SUNY Buffalo State which she declined due to her mother’s ailing health. Marjorie received a Bachelor’s degree from Hunter College in English Language Arts. While she was at Hunter college, she met her college sweetheart, Roman Vail. Two years after receiving her Bachelor’s degree Roman and Marjorie got married in NYC and made a life together. It was during the first few years of their marriage that Marjorie began her teaching at an exclusive private school in New York City as an assistant teacher. At this school, Marjorie’s pedagogy grew stronger under the mentorship and guidance of some great teachers. In 2004, Marjorie and Roman were preparing for one of the most exciting 116

with not-for-profit and schools in all five boroughs. Something clicked for Marjorie and Roman, they attended a volunteer orientation. Marjorie began to volunteer tirelessly. She realized, the more she volunteered, the more joy and peace she felt. Not that volunteering made her forget her tragedy, but volunteering gave her purpose and joy knowing she was helping someone else. Since then, Marjorie has devoted her time to volunteering. Her faith kept her hopeful but servitude gave her life again. After teaching for several years, Marjorie was accepted to one of her dream schools, New York University and their accelerated master’s program. When she was about to embark to graduate school, Marjorie and Roman found out they were expecting again. Marjorie decided that she would go on with her studies. She started balancing graduate school while pregnant and received her degree by the time her son Amaelian was nine months old.

Marjorie fell into a deep depression. Especially after all of her friends who were pregnant at the same time as her all delivered their babies. Then one day, while Marjorie was watching the news, she saw a news segment about New York Cares. New York Cares is one of the largest volunteer networks in New York City. They offer thousands of volunteer opportunities

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This was a poignant time in Marjorie’s life because it taught her several things about herself. Marjorie learned that she was brave--brave to have another baby after her first loss, she is resilient---it was not easy writing papers when you have a human being moving around in your belly and screaming to be fed. Lastly, women are amazing--she’s amazing! We’re scholars, incubators of humans, and rocking wives!

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PAGEANT WINERS

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“Lastly, women are amazing--she’s amazing! We’re scholars, incubators of humans, and rocking wives!”

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SPECIAL FEATURE SHE HUSTLES TALKS {{{{SHE SHIFT+CONTROL HUSTLES TALKS { RECOVERX } }}} “Pageantry was a life-long dream of Marjorie’s which she thought had escaped her, having been married so young; however -- after years of research, she was able to find the Mrs. New York America pageant, which also heavily leaned on community service.”

Giving birth to Amaelian did not stop Marjorie’s community service. As a Haitian-American, when hearing of the devastating earthquake in Haiti had occurred, it was an easy decision for Marjorie to return to do missionary work in Haiti. Yet, she yearned to do more. Educate Haiti Now’s annual Teacher Summer Institute is held in Haiti with much success, making it a great platform for Marjorie. As an educator, this was a huge attraction in Marjorie’s decision to volunteer for EHN. Being the recipient of the Woman of Excellence Award as well as a Citation from the Borough of Brooklyn for her community service has fueled Marjorie to keep up her work in service.

New York America pageant, which also heavily leaned on community service. This was a win-win; combining community service and pageantry. She grew from her first participation in the

In her free time, Marjorie loves to dance; she’s a self-proclaimed dance-a-holic. Marjorie enjoys traveling with her family and friends--especially to Europe. She enjoys getting all dolled up and brunching with her girlfriends. Marjorie loves to read and is a life-long learner having earned two Master’s degrees and about to earn her third. Marjorie is also a public speaker and is currently the Vice President of Education for L.AC.E. Toastmasters. She has been invited to speak at several events as a motivational speaker, inspiring others to push past their adversities to reach their greater selves. Marjorie is enamored with the Victorian era---enjoying all things from that era, especially afternoon tea. Mostly, she loves to spend time with her boys-husband Roman of 18 years and her 14 year old son Amaelian.

After years of searching, Marjorie finally found an organization that is devoted to supporting families who have suffered a stillbirth---Star Legacy Foundation. Star Legacy Foundation is dedicated to increasing awareness, supporting research, promoting education, and encouraging advocacy and family support regarding stillbirth, pregnancy loss, and neonatal death. Marjorie is determined to give to families in a way she never received. Pageantry was a life-long dream of Marjorie’s which she thought had escaped her, having been married so young; however -- after years of research, she was able to find the Mrs.

York American, a new division in the Mrs. America organization. She looks forward to going to Las Vegas, NV this fall to compete with 50 other women across our nation to be the first ever Mrs. American. The winner will have a chance to compete for the Mrs. World title in Sri Lanka. Marjorie is excited to raise awareness of her platform and for the experience.

Mrs. New York America pageant, not having won but learning so much and meeting so many fabulous women. Marjorie competed again this year and was crowned the first ever Mrs. New

Marjorie is looking forward to next year’s Mrs. New York America pageant on May 21-23 at the RIT Inn & Conference Center, Rochester, NY.

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Letâ€™s

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MISS NEW YORK FOR AMERICA 2020 GABRIELLE WRIGHT Gabby is a quintessential New Yorker. She grew up in the Capital Region, hiking trails of the Adirondacks and picking apples at her favorite orchards. Now living in Manhattan, she is busy completing her Masters in Business Administration, with a focus on Healthcare Administration, and working full-time as a Human Resources Coordinator at Omnicom Health Group. Gabby has always been an advocate for people with special needs. Her best friend’s brother has special needs, so growing up, Gabby learned first-hand about caretaking difficulties, social obstacles, and of course, the joys of having a special needs person in her life. She participated in her school’s Best Buddies program and continues to attend events and enroll in programs run by the Centers of Disability Services. Gabby is dedicated to protecting and supporting those with special needs. Some fun facts about Gabby is that she played college Lacrosse, she was born on midnight on New Year’s Day, and she’s a huge animal lover. In her

spare time she loves to hangout with her close friends and discover new places in New York City. She has always had an interest in Art, and enjoys attending various different Art Galleries and events. Gabby’s friends and family would

describe her as incredibly caring, positive and generous. She is always lending a helping hand to those in need and does so with a smile on her face. When faced with adversity in life, she has always maintained a positive outlook on life. Her positivity shines through to every new person

she meets. Gabby loves to travel and jumped at the chance to study a semester in England. During her time abroad she spent time touring Europe with her Nana and Aunt, which is still one of her favorite memories! But Gabby will, also, travel to beautiful beaches for pure relaxation, especially when she visits her grandparents in Florida. If she could offer one piece of advice to the next titleholder, it would be to always believe in yourself unconditionally. It’s e x t re m e l y important to know your worth and remind yourself that you are capable of anything if you put your mind to it. Be the best version of you at all times, and don’t let anyone tell you that you aren’t enough. We are all queens. Gabby will compete in the National Pageant on January 22nd-29th. She will also crown her successor on May 23rd 2021 at the RIT Inn and Conference Center.

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SPECIAL FEATURE }} {{ SHIFT+CONTROL “Gabby has always been an advocate for people with special needs. Her best friend’s brother has special needs, so growing up, Gabby learned first-hand about caretaking difficulties, social obstacles, and of course, the joys of having a special needs person in her life.”

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NUTRITION FIX NY BY JULIE LIVESEY

WELCOME TO THE CLUB –owner, operator, and head barista Julie Livesey is here to serve you a most satisfying meal replacement shake. Our shakes will make your taste buds come alive. Our beautifully crafted cup of PositiviTEA, packed with energy and soothing aloe, is the perfect complement to your shake. The shakes and teas can be enjoyed individually but are best when combined as a combo.

very own personal wellness coach who can help you work towards your health and nutrition goals. Our shake bar provides you the convenience of eating healthy on the go. We can also provide you a plan to use these products in the comfort of your own home. We call the store a “nutrition club” and customers “members” simply to let you know that

The community has embraced Nutrition Fix as a “Happy Place” since we opened in May of 2020. During these challenging business times, the community has enjoyed the unique concept the club has to offer and has helped spread the word through their social networking platforms. I am genuinely enjoying getting to know the community and embracing their individual health needs through the club.

As an ambitious and driven individual, I thrive on challenges and find gratification in constantly setting goals for myself. My biggest challenge recently is introducing a community to the new concept of a nutrition club in the middle of a pandemic. As crazy as it sounds, I enjoy these challenges and working hard towards the goals that I have implemented for myself and this amazing new business that I am deeply passionate about. I strive to always do more than I think I can because settling is not an option for me. What is Nutrition Fix? Nutrition Fix is a nutrition club designed for literally anybody, young an old. Our colorful, energetic, and positive vibe club is located in Liverpool, New York. We provide healthy meal options to our community, as well as a variety of daily nutritional needs, free body composition testing, community events and you can even get paired up with your

meal replacement shakes. The traditional shake is a Perfect Protein Membership with 24 grams of plant-based protein and 21 vitamins and minerals and an average of 250 calories. It certainly is a must come and try, for breakfast and/or lunch or at one of our Shake Sampling Parties or just for relaxing at the bar with friends.

when you order a tea, aloe and shake you have full access to everything else that we have to offer including our wellness profile. Ordering is simple: 1st choose your tea for energy then a shot of aloe which soothes the digestive system for your first drink which will compliment your full meal replacement shake. We have over 100 flavorful options for our

My motivation for working so hard and my “WHY” in life is simply for my family. I am a loving wife of 17 years and proud mother of two ambitious young men. I always strive to improve the life and minds of my young teen boys. They are my driving factor and the reason I chose to open the Nutrition Club. I wanted them to be a part of the process of learning how to build their own future through experience and mentoring. When my boys look back on life, I want them to say “I worked hard side by side with my parents and that has contributed

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to who I am today”. Since they were born, they have been involved with the family owned restaurant Rudy’s Lakeside Drive-in, Oswego, NY. Nutrition Fix has given them the experience and knowledge of developing a business from the ground up. Our club, has offered them firsthand experience at what it takes to locate the perfect site, the process of demolishing and working with contractors to construct a functional exciting space from a vision, to shaking shakes side by side with each other. It all has immense value that will be instilled in them as they continue to grow into young entrepreneurs themselves. 134

What value do I contribute to the world? I have been described as outgoing. I go above and beyond to ensure that all those that surround me feel special and important. My inspiration comes from those that I have impacted in life and the the smiles I bring to others. Being a volunteer Zumba instructor at my local YMCA for over 11 years has allowed me to contribute to improving the lifestyle of other individuals as well as my own. Being a part of several nonfor-profit organizations over the years, has had significant personal growth and awareness in uncovering my strengths and weaknesses in life. One of the greatest qualities a person can obtain

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is to inspire others. I hope to influence others to be motivated and inspired to realize their dreams are waiting for them through dedication, commitment, and hard work. Waking up in the morning with a smile on your face and knowing you are exactly where you were meant to be is truly satisfying to me. I wake up with a smile and go to bed with a full heart. I am truly blessed for the love and support from my family and community. My family’s support and inspiration are what drives me to be better every day. I know I was put on this earth to bring others together, to inspire and support and to witness the strength we have in each other.

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SPECIAL INSERT WOMEN OWNED BUSINESSES

FEATURING:

- COVER: FASHION RESCUE 911 BOUTIQUE & FASHION TRUCK - VOICES OF IMPACT - SYRACUSE SILHOUETTE - THE BEAUTY ROOM - KL STORYOGRAPHY - THE GRACE OF HANNAH - THE BEEHIVE - THE ROLE MODEL WAY AND MORE!

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FASHION RESCUE 911 BOUTIQUE BY ANGELA ANTONELLO

“Who ever said you can’t buy happiness simply doesn’t know where to shop .” Local entrepreneur Angela Antonello founded Fashion Rescue 911 in 2017 offering customers in Syracuse the first ever full service fashion truck. Her motto is “We Stop , You Shop “ she often jokes that great style doesn’t fall off the back of any truck!

her . With the recent boom of the food truck industry her search for the perfect truck was on ! Angela bought her 1990 fire rescue truck within an hour after finding and drove it directly to her brother’s shop, where he transformed her vision into reality — the Fashion Rescue 911 Street Boutique Her first season operating the street

Antonello said following grew quick and her clothing was in such high demand she saw the need to expand her business. The Boutique was open shortly after and is located in heart of Baldwinsville . But this mover and shaker doesn’t stop there , she has-recently launched an online store and a pop up shop will soon be coming to Destiny USA for the holidays . Angela was born with the love for fashion. She knew at an early age she wanted to be a hairdresser and loved putting makeup on and dressing up. After spending 30 plus years in the salon industry she was destined to go after her dream of opening a Boutique with a twist. She recalls seeing the concept of a traveling Boutique on the west coast over 10 years ago, that concept began brewing in her head. Some call it determination , others call it drive but she said once she puts her mind to something, there’s no stopping

boutique ran from September to late November. She developed a following pretty quickly but once the snow started flying, it became difficult to operate in the colder months . Over the winter months, she rented space in Baldwinsville and held popup shopping a few days a week. Her original intent was to get through the winter and start the truck season back up in early spring. Listening to her customers, she quickly learned they

enjoyed having The Boutique as a go-to location along with the truck. The search for her storefront began . She quickly fell in love with the Baldwinsville community and loved how welcoming other local businesses were. Within days she heard the space she had her eye on was available and she enlisted her brother once again . With opening The Boutique she wanted to fill a void in the women’s clothing market. Her goal was to create a place that would bring confidence and happiness to a woman’s day. “Shopping is jokingly compared to therapy , that one fantastic new outfit can turn your day around , it can hold the power to give the confidence you need going into an interview or give that stay at home mom a reason to smile after that rare moment she treats herself.” When curating lines shes began asking her customers what they wanted to see in store and online . It wasn’t something that was the norm in the industry and became a great way to really get to know her “girl“ and add more value and exclusivity to her boutique . When sending online orders she often includes a handwriting note in hopes that it brought an extra smile to her

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{{ { SHE HUSTLES SHE HUSTLES TALKS TALKS}}} SHIFT+CONTROL “Who ever said you can’t buy happiness simply doesn’t know where to shop .“

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customers day . The Boutique offers private sip and shop events too as it’s always fun to shop with your girlfriends!

balance , the support she has from her family , friends and the community is immeasurable.

Fashion Rescue 911 strives to offer a more personal experience, there is something very comfortable about running into the store and seeing the same faces . Whether her customers come in once a week, once a month, or once a season, she says it her job to remember what they like, bought, and have in their closet.

You will find lines such as Liverpool Jeans, Z Supply, Six Fifty, Commando, Kut From The Kloth , Mystree, Yummie, Haute Shore, Gemelli Jewerly and more. It remains a top priority to promote and support local businesses, you will find local vendors in the shop as well as several collaborations with others around town .

Angela values her team , her independent associate adds immense value and creates

Community and giving back is important to her , she serves on board

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of the Greater Baldwinsville Chamber of Commerce and participates in the Hope for Heather Charity’s Fashion Show every year as well as supporting many local charities. Shop online at www.shopfashionrescue911. Visit The Boutique 52 Oswego St. Baldwinsville, NY 13027 Wed-Fri 12-5 , Saturday 11-3 Book the Truck 315-857-6690 April -Oct Follow us on Instagram & Facebook

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SYRACUSE SILHOUETTE BY ALLISON E. HANDWORK

At Syracuse Silhouette we have over ten years of combined experience in an array of skin and spa treatments, including CryoSkin, Vacuum Therapy, Microblading and Plasma Skin Tightening. We pride ourselves on providing personal attention to our clients in our safe, clean and comfortable studio. Get the youthful look youâ€™ve been looking for, shape and sculpt your body and treat yourself to a new you at Syracuse Silhouette!

anywhere on the body. Larger cups are used to stimulate the gluteal muscles, leaving you with a more voluptuous, plump rear! Microblading is the implantation of pigment in to the secondary layer of skin, thus creating hair strokes in

Here is a brief description of the services we offer: C r y o Sk i n i s a revolutionary treatment from Europe that permanently destroys fat cells. The technique uses hot and cold massage to shape and sculpt the body. Results can be seen immediately and continue to improve over the course of two weeks. Vacuum Therapy is a non-invasive body sculpting treatment that uses ultrasound waves to stimulate the muscle and mobilize fat. The result is smooth firm skin. Vacuum Therapy can be used to reduce cellulite

the same results as traditional surgery, without the cost or downtime. The most popular areas to treat are the eyes, crows feet, jowls, neck, creepy or wrinkled skin and much more. We a r e c u r r e n t l y o f f e r i n g complimentary consultations and would love to welcome you to our beautiful studio, t o l e a r n h ow these incredible treatments could help you achieve your goals! Locally owned and located w i t h i n Ro o t s Salon, Syracuse Silhouette is licensed, certified and insured for all our skin treatment services. Youâ€™ll get the personal, oneon-one attention you deserve with confidentiality at your discretion.

the eyebrow. The result is beautiful, perfectly shaped brows. Plasma Skin Tightening is a revolutionary treatment used to tighten and lift skin anywhere on the body. The Plasma treatment is a nonsurgical procedure that will produce

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“Available here at Syracuse Silhouette, CryoSkin is a revolutionary treatment from Italy that uses hot and cold massage to permanently destroy fat cells, while toning and tightening skin.”

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8400 OSWEGO RD. STE 1 I LIVERPOOL, NY I SYRACUSESILHOUETTE.COM I (315) 848-6020

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KL STORYOGRAPHY BY KATRINA LYNNE

What is your story? What makes you feel passionate? What do you want to feel each and every day? What parts of you do you share with the outside world and which parts do you hide?

me that that I sometimes didn’t recognize or connect myself to. I was going through the motions, getting the “must-dos” accomplished, but not the “need-tos” (these are definitely different that the “musts”) or the “want-tos”. Those latter two seemed selfish and didn’t fit into what I thought my life entailed. That is how I spent a lot of my life in a fog. I can go on and on and talk about how I

How can I help you make all of those parts come alive and make you proud of each and every one? These are questions that I began to ask myself, completely subconsciously, over the last 5 years or so, and they are what have helped me evolve my life and my business into what it is today. These questions have given me purpose and fire to be who I am, so that I am able to give what I can to others. These are questions that I will ask you, and allow you to answer in any way, without any judgement; and I hope that you do so without any apologies of who you are. This is the premise of both Katrina Lynne StoryOgraphy and KL Branding StoryOgraphy. Being a woman, a divorced one at that, a mom of three kids (from 9 to 21), and someone who never intended to be a business owner, are all aspects of 152

realized that I want to feel free to by myself, to feel alive in exploring and enjoying the people and world around me, to feel that I can provide others with the same gifts, that I am ready to share all the imperfect parts of me (I am a terrible bookkeeper and lose track of time too easily!), but that I am so proud that the parts of me that mean the most are those that are driven to help others share and honor their own stories. I didn’t realize at first that creating this business meant that I was designing it for me too. But that is what happened. This is my why.

always wanted to be a mom and a wife and to keep the house looking like this, our lives living like that….and I can go on and talk about the reality of it all. I’m not going to do that. What I will share is that I finally came out of that fog. How I am finally able to give others so much more because I have given to myself. I have rewritten my story, found what makes me passionate,

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I want women, no matter what they do each day, to feel that being a woman is just as important (if not more so) as being a partner, a parent, an employee, a business owner, a volunteer….. because being true to herself allows her to be so much more to those around her. I want couples, no matter what they do when together or apart, to feel love, passion and respect for each other as partners, as well as individuals….because having someone love you like you’re meant to be loved is absolutely priceless

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HUSTLES TALKS } } } { {IN { SHE SHIFT+CONTROL HER OWN WORDS “I could go on forever about this, because it is what gives me that fire and passion. I can attest to all of this because I have gone through it myself. ”

I want businesses, no matter what service they provide or sell, to feel that what they do is directly connected to who they are and that they can connect with their clients or customers in ways that speak to their own passions and purposes….because having a job isn’t the reason you started your business, it was to have a life that meant something to you.

active business owner and you need to be ready to jump in and help a client and ties can get get in the way). I care that you are true to yourself, so that you can create meaningful connections to everyone around you, starting with yourself.

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Our stories, our testaments to who we are, are the legacies that we leave behind in every photograph. StoryOgraphy session experiences are what I created from my heart – to guide people in feeling that fire and passion for themselves, towards their partners and families, and for their business and what they gift to their clients.

So, how does any of this relate to photography? You can’t deny what seeing a photograph does to you; what it makes you think, where it takes your mind or your heart, when it can trigger an emotion or a memory that you didn’t realize you longed for, why it makes you laugh with joy, or who it makes you connect to. These connections start with you. Photographs are your memories, your emotions, your story, recorded. Forever. This is why I use the term StoryOgraphy, not PHOTOgraphy. To me, it’s more than having a picture. It’s a whole “worth a thousand words” thing. I take photos of your story. I could care less if your hair is perfect (when is it ever really perfect?). I don’t care if you don’t wear a tie in your bio photos (because you are an

Whatever it is that makes you you, that’s what you need to be. That’s the story that you should tell. I’m just here to help you do it.

I could go on forever about this, because it is what gives me that fire and passion. I can attest to all of this because I have gone through it myself. I have reconnected to myself, as a woman, as a mom, and yes, also as a business owner (who would have thought?!?).

It’s completely different when you can witness something in a photo that gives you a look into someone’s personality, their spirit.

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I’d love to connect with YOU anytime! Thanks so much for listening and I hope that something I said resonates with who you are and how you feel. I’d love to hear about it if it did! XO, Katrina

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CNY GYM CENTRE CNY Gym Centre is one of Central New York’s best gymnastics facilities. With two locations, one at the Great Northern Mall and the other on Erie Boulevard in Dewitt, CNY Gym has the capability to serve a large portion of the community. Co-owners Michelle Gregory and Lauren Tassini make it their goal to provide a high-quality gymnastics program in a safe and fun environment. CNY offers recreational gymnastics classes for all ages, starting as young as 6 months. CNY also has a competitive team program for both men’s and women’s gymnastics. Many team gymnastics have been with the gym for the majority of their school-aged lives, achieving developmental milestones through the curriculum and learning the value of hard work, perseverance, and dedication. Creativity is the cornerstone of working with children; it was exactly this that allowed CNY Gym Centre to not only survive the statewide shutdown in March, but to continue to offer gymnastics instruction during the physical time away. Via a combination of live YouTube instructional videos, an online learning platform, and copious amounts of Zoom meetings, the gym was able to offer distanced instruction to all age groups and levels. Coaches had to get fairly inventive with the activities to be done at home since the average

gymnast does not own a bar set, rings, or other apparatus. Despite the challenges of online learning with such a physical sport as gymnastics, the gym received an immense amount of support from their families. Everyone was itching to get back into the facilities to be able to practice gymnastics together again. Gregory and Tassini worked tirelessly as New York State published guidelines and subsequent revisions

for the re-opening of child sports and recreation. Staff were trained in the new policies, cleaning procedures, and social distancing measures. Finally, in July both locations were set to open their doors again to their students. Gregory and Tassini decided to mirror the state’s phased approach to reopening and began with no-contact practices for their team gymnasts. Next was adding recreational classes starting with the older groups and trickling down to pre-

school gymnastics. With the addition of spotting, gymnastics is practically back to normal. At CNY, safety is always the priority and each staff member is well versed in the new routine. Throughout both locations are colored dots that clearly indicate where each child should stand. The dots are 6 feet apart to ensure proper social distancing. Each class or “pod” occupies a space within the gym that is only theirs; classes and pods do not overlap with each other so that each gymnast only comes into contact with their own group. Instructors sanitize their hands between each child they spot. Gymnasts are often told to sanitize their own hands via the many dispensers placed throughout the gym. All mats are wiped down between each group to minimize contact with others. Common areas such as the lobby and restrooms are periodically sanitized throughout the day. At the end of each night, the gym receives a full wipe down, ensuring cleanliness daily. Not only are the staff at CNY hard at work teaching gymnastics, the facility also offers eduCAMP. Gregory and Tassini saw a need for working families who desired something a little extra in their childcare for their children participating in online learning this fall. EduCAMP includes time for synchronous

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{{ SHE SHE HUSTLES HUSTLES TALKS TALKS }} “Co-owners Michelle Gregory and Lauren Tassini make it their goal to provide a highquality gymnastics program in a safe and fun environment.”

learning, independent work, crafting, and gymnastics. Gregory and Tassini always aim to offer a clean, safe space to bring children during the cold winter months; this year they are doubling their efforts to fulfil the needs of CNY families. As the months cool and outdoor activities become scarce, gymnastics is a great choice for an indoor activity. It’s structured fun, teaches children social skills and motor development, and increases strength. For parents who would like to enroll 162

their child in gymnastics but do not wish to attend a full class, CNY is also providing pod classes (smaller classes to be scheduled with multiple children of the same family or families who are choosing to be together), and private lessons. It is truly a testament to the dedicated families of CNY Gym Centre to see their tremendous support through all the changes that we’ve all been facing as we’ve been going back to normal in all areas including sports. CNY has never

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had such high enrollment and Gregory and Tassini are both overwhelmed by the positivity of the families and the high demand for gymnastics classes. CNY Gym Centre will continue to grow under their leadership, no matter what comes next in 2020.

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THE BEE HIVE BY ANNETTE FILMER DEAN

The Bee Hive Apothecary is your favorite local road-side stand. Born from a childhood dream to someday own a little hobby farm and produce stand, Annette, the creator and sole proprietor of The Bee Hive Apothecary, officially opened the doors to this dream in July 2018. Here you will find a variety of Local Raw Honey and CNY sourced Maple Syrup with an ever-expanding honey/maple based, uniquely formulated lip & body balms, essentialoil infused soaps, pure beeswax candles, elderberry syrups, and seasonal garlics & vegetables, and more. She has always been insprired by her father’s contagious passion for learning bee-keeping skills and preserving and appreciating the wonders of natures beauty, as well as the family’s legacy of processing Maple Syrup that the grandchildren have enjoyed ever since they can remember. Annette’s main store front is located in Chittenango, NY. She since has expanded into working with other small local businesses, such as Wildflower Armory in downtown Syracuse, and Koinonia Juice Bar in Dewitt NY, who offer her products on a regualr basis. Since the current pandemic hit, 164

Annette and her daughter Julia, were inspired to shift with the changes by developing a online website, all whilst creating more wellness products from home. Annette says, “All of the

that worked and thus began her own personal journey to recover from what was once undiagnosable, the extremely difficult to overcome, chronic lyme disease. She also believes that her personal journey from that dark night of the soul, when she was bedridden and in a wheelchair, served a larger purpose as she found answers that worked to heal herself, inside and out. “The Bee HIve is my “fun, inspiring creative outlet” but is is also a very solid piece of the puzzle when it comes to serving my community, helping others who have known suffering and appreciate the value of properly sourced health & wellness products, or who intend to substitue processed sugars with a daily spoonful of delicious raw honey or a drizzle of real maple syrup!!”

products at The Bee Hive are very thoughtfully and intuitively derived with our client’s health and wellness in mind.” After suffering for years with a “mysterious illness”, Annette was determinded to heal her body fully. She dug deeply until she found answers

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With the holiday season fast approaching, you can find all the buzz, updates & live events of The Bee Hive Apothecary on Facebook and Instagram pages. Our website will be updated as our holiday gift sets become available. Contact information: https://jdean3733. wixsite.com/thebeehive TheBeeHive2018@gmail.com 3153915486

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HUSTLES TALKS } } { {INSHE HER OWN WORDS “All of the products at The Bee Hive are very thoughtfully and intuitively derived with our client’s health and wellness in mind.”

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VOICES OF IMPACT BY: DANIELLE MENSING

My name is Danielle Mensing, Founder of Voices For Impact, a new podcast and brand gaining momentum in Central New York. Voices for Impact is bringing local and globally recognized thought leaders together to share new ways of thinking about life, business, and leadership. I am writing this article after learning of the passing of Supreme Court Justice Ruth Bader Ginsberg. RBG persevered through challenging personal and political times. Despite the gender inequality she experienced, RBG went on to change the world for the better. One of her many empowering quotes has stuck with me, “Fight for the things that you care about, but do it in a way that will lead others to join you”. She was a trailblazer and embodies so many of the qualities I want to strive for in my work as a fundraiser for a local nonprofit and my work as a social entrepreneur creating a movement that empowers others to persevere through adversities while making a positive impact on their communities. Voices For Impact’s mission is to help people THRIVE by creating content that encourages a growth mindset and reimagines how people can find their purpose. Started during the Covid-19 pandemic and Made in ‘Cuse, Voices For Impact gives people tips on overcoming challenges and keeping a positive mindset by sharing real stories of leaders in our local community and 174

from around the world that have made significant accomplishments in their lives and have gone through their own adversities but have made it through those challenges and made positive impacts through their work. Voices For Impact is full of conversations with entrepreneurs, artists, educators, athletes and changemakers. They are people who have built a business, started a movement, or impacted communities.

• Kyle Mecca - Writer, Director and Producer of the movie Dwelling available on Amazon Prime.

A few of the thought leaders on Voices for Impact episodes: • Latavius Murray - NFL Running Back for the New Orleans Saints

I ask them about the stories behind their success and the tools and tactics these individuals utilize that have helped them succeed. Viewers can listen and learn from our conversations and can use the information and apply it to their own lives. I wanted to create a platform where thought leaders could share their stories and give advice that would resonate or provide value to people during the challenging time our community and around the world is facing.

• Eric Devendorf - Former proBasketball player • Julia Goodwin - Singer/songwriter (on Season 9 of Americas Got Talent) • Kristin Duquette - Political appointee to the Obama administration, globally recognized disability rights activist, currently works as an analyst for afederal agency. She’s spoken at the UN and has been featured in Forbes. • Amanda Hughes - Local business owner of The Ice Cream Stand and Jaynes Collective • Ben Conard - A human rights activist, and Founder of Five North Chocolate snacks. Five North has been featured by Forbes, President Clinton, Donna Karan, Entertainment Weekly, Bank of America, Ernst & Young, Goldman Sachs, KPMG, Google, and Cornell University.

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• Michael Sgro - Business and Leadership Coach • Eve Van De Wal - Regional VP of Excellus BCBS • Dr. Esther Ngumbi - Entomologist and Educator

What is my WHY? Investing in my community and giving back to me means showing up and taking action. I think it is important to become aware of what is happening around you and what others are experiencing. Empowering others to make a positive impact is another reason I started this podcast because even if you start small you can cause a ripple effect on what happens tomorrow. Changing the world can seem like a job that’s too big to take on by ourselves and that we don’t have the time or resources to make a noticeable

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difference. But the real truth is that you do have the power to make a positive impact. I’ve also learned it’s so important to create a network around you that you can learn from, is confident in themselves, supportive and empowers you to go after what makes you happy.

midst of challenges. Lastly, and I think the most important point is the importance of emotional intelligence and empathy. While EI has been a major buzz word in the professional

E m a i l voices4impactcuse@ gmail.com if you would like to get your message out to a new audience by sponsoring an episode or sharing your story to help encourage people to find their passion and purpose. I’m always happy to meet up for a (socially-distant) coffee!

I close most episodes with this one question: How do you define success? And everyone I’ve asked this question to has responded pretty much the same way but in their own words. The response: Being happy equals success. For me, one of the best ways to find happiness is to help improve the lives of others. It gives me a sense of purpose and fulfillment. Making your mark on the world in a positive way is a noble goal. There have been many “impact moments” or takeaways I have learned from the thought leaders on my podcast. I want to share a few of them with you… First, overcoming fears. Fears hold you back and once you overcome your fears (whatever that may be to you) you can truly be at your optimal level. Second, appreciate the blessings you have and practice gratitude. A very simple statement yet sometimes it’s hard to practice when you’re in the 178

and for more daily inspiration and teachings listen to Voices For Impact on the go on Apple, Spotify, and iHeart Radio podcast platforms. Subscribe and stay connected on Instagram, Facebook, YouTube and LinkedIn @VoicesForImpact.

world as of late, when it comes to happiness and success in life improving your EQ matters just as much, if not more than intellectual ability. I hope you feel motivated to take on the day after reading this article

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Danielle is a Nazareth College alum and is pursuing her MBA. Currently she works as the Development Director for the Foundation of the Roman Catholic Diocese. In this role, she oversees the Annual HOPE Appeal campaign which raises $4.5 million to fund programs that assist over 200,000+ individuals and families in a seven county area. In addition, she volunteers for several organizations in the community and is a Board Member for Association for Fundraising Professionals and a Central New York Business Journal’s 40 Under Forty honoree.

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THE GRACE OF HANNAH BY TIFFANY LEWIS

Hello my name is Tiffany Lewis-English.... I am a Nurse, Wife & Author đ&#x;’› On July 17,2017 My life changed in way that I never possibly imagined. It was four months before my wedding â€œThe English Projectâ€? & I was diagnosed with endometriosis & Infertility. Endometriosis is where the normal tissues that lines the inside of your uterus, is found growing on the outside, causing scar tissue to form on the ovaries, Fallopian tubes & uterus. It was threw an intense & invasive procedure that this was discovered. I was told that I had stage 4 endometriosis & that I needed to seek further treatment from a infertility specialist, if I thought I wanted to build a family. My OBGYN assured me that if having children wasnâ€™t apart of my plan, a total hysterectomy would be the move. That wasnâ€™t what myself or my husband visioned for our lives. I had 2 surgeries in 2017. It was overwhelming and unbearable, collectively my the fiancĂŠ & I decided that we would hold off until after the wedding. In January 2018 we began treatments with a fertility Doctor & the more appointments I attended, the more hurt I became. I trusted God but I 182

needed to understand WHY? I had gotten married & was ready to start a family & I couldnâ€™t. I remember sitting in different support groups feeling completely out of place. I was sitting with groups of individuals who didnâ€™t know what this journey meant to me. A round of IVF (in vitro fertilization)

was anywhere from $13,000-$20,000 & we didnâ€™t have that. The people who joined us in this group didnâ€™t have that same issue. They had it, had spent it & was ready for a second round. That made me feel defeated. I couldnâ€™t relate to them & they couldnâ€™t relate to me. I made up in my mind that I would stop attending these â€œSupport Groupsâ€?â€źď¸?

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There was no support for someone like myself & Husband. I started to pray even harder asking God â€œWhat are you teaching usâ€?? â€œWhat are you trying to get through usâ€?? I received a text message from a friend & it read â€œHey girl, you are the modern day Hannahâ€? I was confused but said â€œOh hey... ok girlâ€? a few hours later I walked into my grandfather church & he was preaching about Hannah & my aunt yells to me â€œHey Hannahâ€?. I went home that night & I researched Hannah from the Bible & read the scripture. I smiled closed my Bible & went to bed. A few nights later at 4am God woke me up with the vision. â€œYou shall create what it is that you were looking for during this journey. You will create a support group for people like YOU.... The same Grace that I gave Hannah I shall give to you & the families connected to youâ€? ! March 2018, I became the Founder of â€œGrace of Hannah (IN)Fertility support groupâ€? And August 2020 The CEO & Founder of Hannahs Heart Fertility LLC Many families deal with (IN)Fertility. To be exact 1 in 8 couples. Hannahs heart

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“You shall create what it is that you were looking for during this journey. You will create a support group for people like YOU.... The same Grace that I gave Hannah I shall give to you & the families connected to you!”

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HUSTLES TALKS } } } { {IN { SHE SHIFT+CONTROL HER OWN WORDS “Many families deal with (IN)Fertility. To be exact 1 in 8 couples. Hannahs heart fertility LLC is an safe haven for men and women to come and seek holistic care.”

fertility LLC is an safe haven for men and women to come and seek holistic care. There is a trained Holistic fertility Doula who will encourage families with healthy lifestyle changes that will assist or aide in getting pregnant naturally. As we do not guarantee pregnancy, we do not diagnose or give a prognosis, however we do educate on different steps to assisting with pregnancy. We offer 3 month segments to help prepare your body for motherhood. In the event that that pregnancy does not

happen, Grace of Hannah steps in and assist with locating the proper fertility specialist for you. Our main objective is to help in a holistic, healthy, Spiritual and financial way. I have formed a number of platforms to help educate on the importance of healthy living & preparing our bodies for what we are praying for. I published my first Journal “SpeakLife 31 Day affirmation Journal for women dealing with infertility & Infant loss” July 2019 because I am a firm believer that “What we speak out of our Mouth shall come

to pass”... I am on a journey to help HeAl(HeR) You can follow us on fb @The grace of Hannah (IN)Fertility Support Group IG: Hannahsheart_infertility Our office is Located 550 Latona Rd suite 413D Phone:(585)470-8621

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{ { SHE {HUSTLES SHE HUSTLES ENTREPRENHERS TALKS } }} SHEHUSTLES ENTREPRENHERS

ROLE MODEL WAY My mom loves to remind me that she always knew I would be a teacher. Of course, when she used to say this to me, she meant a traditional K-12 public school type of teacher, not a teacher of adult business owners, career seekers, entrepreneurs, and intrapreneurs. My dad, on the other hand, jokingly told everyone I was going to be a brain surgeon. The problem with both of these, as Carol Dweck, one of the leading authorities on growth mindset for kids, points out in her book Mindset, neither one of these methods is a healthy way to encourage a kid to find their passion or their confidence; they certainly weren’t role modeling behaviors that were going to help me figure out what my goals were or how get there. Growing up, most of my role models were on MTV. Like many other Gen X kids, both of my parents worked and me and my 3 siblings, and one cousin, went to an after school program. As the oldest, I was always the protector and the responsible one. I was proud when one of my little sisters wrote an essay about how she wanted to be like me, her cool big sister. This is likely where the Role Model Way™ was first ignited even if I didn’t know it at the time. By high school, I had figured out what was important to me in life and it wasn’t grades. I loved music, having fun with my friends, learning new 188

skills, and creating art. I played cello, spent many a long night crafting, drawing, painting, and writing poems after everyone else was asleep. I wrote books, screenplays, I designed websites, and taught myself how to program. What does one do with all of this talent and no direction? They bounce around life like the shiny silver ball in a pinball machine. Until, finally,

they get exposed to something that reveals itself as a passion. For me that was problem-solving. Problemsolving in the business world allows me to combine all of my talents into one giant tool-box for helping others solve their problems. The one man who was a great role model for me was my grandfather on my mom’s side. He started a plumbing supply company in Michigan that is still in operation today. He was always dishing out advice and praise.

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He was a man’s man, a great investor, storyteller, poker player, and the like. In that world, women were expected to be sugar and spice and everything nice; a thing I thought sounded awful. That said, even though my grandfather was a great role model, he wasn’t the best fit for a mentor to me. As I mentioned, aside from my grandfather, most of my role models in my younger years had been rock stars and actors and actresses, a thing that is still all too common in today’s society. If you search the term “role model” on the web, your results will be full of celebs and sports figures, alas, not many down-to-earth, within reach, leadership role models. Especially when it comes to women. Hence, why I opted out of the 9-5 to start teaching business owners, career seekers, entrepreneurs, and intrapreneurs a better way to bring their visions to life. I created a framework and philosophy called, The Role Model Way™. As a business framework, it provides a standard for evaluating performance and a set of fundamentals to teach from. As a philosophy, we believe that we are all role models; either good or bad. We may be good role models in some aspects or areas in our lives but not in others, after all, no one is perfect. However, if we can look through the Role Model lens, we’ll

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{{ SHE HUSTLES TALKS} } SHIFT+CONTROL “What does one do with all of this talent and no direction? They bounce around life like the shiny silver ball in a pinball machine. Until, finally, they get exposed to something that reveals itself as a passion.”

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see those who are in our circle of influence whom we care about and do more to lead by example.

family, friends, colleagues, neighbors, bosses, etc. is an opportunity to be the example.

Look back to what I wrote in the beginning of this article, did you flinch when I said I didn’t have any role models? I had many, I had hundreds, maybe thousands but we’re trained to think that role model is synonymous with “positive”. But in reality, every person and their every action that is seen by a person they influence,

I’m now on a crusade of sorts to encourage people to wear their Role Model hat with pride. Be the responsible big sister or big brother, be the office manager who listens and leads by example rather than telling and tracking, be the business owner who goes above and beyond standard health and environmental

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regulations because it is the right thing to do. Finally, SHARE the CHANGE you want to see in THE WORLD. Being role models is a form of peer pressure but it’s the beneficial peer-pressure we need to create contagious positive change. You can learn more about the Role Model Way™ and our academy at www.therolemodelway.com.

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CRAVEN BEAUTY BY: MICHELLE DIBERNARDO I PHOTOS BY: ANNA CRAVEN

This month I had the absolute pleasure of being lashed by Anna Craven of Cravens Beauty. Craven is located in Vanity Salon 8097 Brewerton Rd in Cicero, New York and is super convenient for our Central New York viewers. Upon arrival I was asked to text before entering the salon due to Covid-19. I text her and instantly I was told to come on in. Very cute, clean salon as I’ve never been there before. It is actually right next to the Exotic Pet Store and Jreck Subs across from Walmart. She offers a variety of different lashes ranging from classic to hybrid up to volume. As we chose together, we quickly decided that volume would work for me. Craven was absolutely amazing with helping me choose the right length for what would work with me. Not too long, but not too short... Just right, like the classic “Three Bears” story. I had let her know that I had gotten them done a couple times previously and that I had been poked in the eye and even had one of my eyes glued shut. So, I wasn’t too amped to get this done again, although I knew the result 192

would look absolutely phenomenal with it being done by Anna. Anna went on to assure me that it wasn’t like that and she was gentle the whole time. It even kind of tickled. Craven also did not glue my eyes together. Phew!!! The appointment overall took 2 hours which she made me very aware of from the start. Anna

is not only professional but very on top of everything being in the pandemic that we are currently in. She explained everything as she was doing it and even asked numerous times if I was comfortable. My legs even had a nice little pillow to lift them up for comfort. Not only would I recommend Craven’s Beauty with 5 out of 5 stars but I would go back to Anna. Lashes are not the only thing

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she does so if you’re interested in a body treatment, waxing or a brow tint Anna is your lady to go to. Even her scheduling process was so easy to follow and made me feel safe before arrival. Confirmation email along with easy to follow directions. Craven was also sure to mention the aftercare of the lashes. Anna has been doing lashes for a little over a year but took the leap of faith to go to Vanity Salon in February 2020 right before Covid-19. A bit nerve-wracking but I’ll leap of faith that she is now happy that she did. Since the reopening of the salon Anna has been booked solid with 12-hour days. She mentioned to me that she likes to take 2 days off of work to spend with her daughter. Craven is always looking for new clients. You will see my lashes with Anna’s before and after photo. Michelle: What inspired you to get into being an esthetician? Anna: I became an esthetician because I always had skin issues myself. It was a huge hit on my self-esteem so on top of wanting to learn how to properly take care of my skin, I also want to help others that are in

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the same boat I was. I got licensed through the Continental School of Beauty. Be sure to check Craven’s Beauty out at: www.Instagram.com/Craven.Beauty.1 194

https://www.facebook.com/ cravenbeauty1 Anna can be booked at https://squareup.com/appointments/ book/NZ3RBZ4J89CJ2 315-657-1801 or cravenbeauty1@ yahoo.com NOW!

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If you would like your Central New York *business reviewed* contact Michelle DiBernardo at Cnywomanonline@gmail.com for more information.

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THE TERESA COSTA COLLECTION BY ROCHESTER WOMAN ONLINE

H I G H FA S H I O N W I T H COMPASSION Teresa created her collection based on her passions for design, fashion, function and being a voice for animals, the environment and promoting compassion and charity. All shoes are made with synthetic materials and are vegan friendly. N otable positions from her professional career have included working at Chanel, Bergdorf Goodman and Bloomingdales. 198

Teresa works with and donates to the country’s leading animals rights organizations for education and rescue. 5% of profits are donated to charities like Peta, Farm Sanctuary and North Shore Animal League. In her free time she loves to be with her family, friends, visit new places and eat good food. Visit Teresa on Instagram or Facebook, links below.

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Timeless Classics Teresa Costa Is Inspired By Classic Designs That Are Timeless And Current Treads That Sizzle With Fun. Meaningful Choice When You Shop For A Cause You Walk With A Purpose. 5% Of Profits Go To Human & Animal Charities Check them out at tcostacollectionnyc.com

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ASK THE DOCTOR {{{ SHE HUSTLES TALKS }}} SHIFT+CONTROL

MEDSPA SOLUTIONS LLC. MedSpa Solutions, LLC opened their doors in February 2019. The three award-winning doctors and business partners at MedSpa Solutions are Dr. Dorothy Kassab, DDS, Dr. Norma Cooney, MD, and Dr. Derek Cooney, MD, FACEP. The doctors and their team are making a huge impact on the industry. They are committed to a customized and individualized approach to beauty and wellness. They believe in bringing out the best in everyone by helping them achieve their personal aesthetic and wellness goals. MedSpa Solutions recently partnered with the luxurious and elegant Mirbeau. They started providing services at Mirbeau Inn & Spa in Skaneateles and Mirbeau Spa in Albany in February 2020. The collaboration with Mirbeau and MedSpa brings the perfect combination of the spa experience and medical aesthetics at the world renounced Mirbeau. Drs. Derek & Norma Cooney and Dr. Dorothy Kassab have created the perfect partnership. They are brilliant and creative and most importantly care about each individual patient. They are quoting in saying, “the patient is all that matters.” MedSpa Solutions 210

aesthetic services are established, supported, and supervised by doctors. All providers, including the doctors, personally evaluated, studied, and received the anti-aging, corrective, and maintenance treatments offered at MedSpa Solutions during the treatment selection process. The

of TMJ disorders, and neuromuscular dentistry in the world-renowned Las Vegas Institute for Advanced Dental Studies. She received her facial aesthetics training in New York City and provides care focusing on the oral and peri-oral regions. Dr. Kassab’s expertise and experience adds unique depth to the MedSpa Solutions team. Dr. Kassab also leads our outreach and resources group, assisting other aspiring aesthetics practitioners. Dr. Norma Cooney has been practicing medicine for over 15 years and is board certified in Emergency Medicine and Undersea & Hyperbaric Medicine.

services are thoughtfully selected by the team of doctors based on quality, safety, and results. Dr. Kassab has been practicing for over 15 years and is one of the few dentists in the State of New York who has been trained in dental aesthetics, smile design, treatment

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In addition to possessing expertise in healing modalities and resuscitation, Dr. Cooney has held a number of key leadership roles at local, regional, and national levels. Dr. Cooney has an academic appointment as Assistant Professor and has authored a number of articles in medical journals as well as a number of medical textbook chapters. Dr. Cooney received her aesthetics training in New York City and focuses her work on ensuring

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DOCTOR { ASK SHIFT+CONTROL }} } { {IN HERTHE OWN WORDS “They are committed to a customized and individualized approach to beauty and wellness. They believe in bringing out the best in everyone by helping them achieve their personal aesthetic and wellness goals.”

total client assessment to ensure a multidisciplinary approach to meet the specific needs of every client. Dr. Derek Cooney has over 15 years as a practicing physician with board certifications in Emergency Medicine, Undersea & Hyperbaric Medicine, EMS Medicine, and an academic appointment as an Associate Professor. He has his own textbook, numerous articles and book chapters, awards, and honors. Dr. Cooney also has experience in local, regional,

and national leadership positions. Dr. Cooney graduated from Texas A&M College of Medicine and completed residency and fellowship at the prestigious Scott & White Memorial Hospital in the Baylor Scott & White System. Dr. Derek Cooney possesses a wealth of experience which he brings to the team at MedSpa Solutions. Dr. Cooney is an expert in resuscitation and fluid management and received his aesthetics training in New York City.

Me d Sp a So l u t i o n s o f f e r s a comprehensive array of medical aesthetics services; here are just a few: • Invisalign - Teeth Whitening - Massage Therapy - Microneedling/ SanguiFacial - PDO Threading/Thread Lift, Non-Surgical Facelifts - Body Sculpting / Fat Reduction/Facial Rejuvenation - Botulinum “Botox” Treatment - Dermal Filler - Laser treatments - Facials/Chemical Peels - Fibroblast Plasma Skin Tightening “Plasma Pen” – HydraFacials - IV Infusions and IV/IM Injections.

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MEET DEBRA MARCOWITZ BY SONIA CONLIN

Overcoming COVID19, thriving and succeeding Debra Markowitz serves as the Director of the Nassau County Film Office. During the four administrations she served in her her 32-year tenure, Ms. Markowitz has steadily increased production of movies, television programs and commercials that are shot in Nassau County, logging over 1000 production days and over $150M in positive economic impact per year. Ms. Markowitz also serves as Vice President of the Long Island Film/TV Foundation, Long Island’s most established and largest not-for-profit agency dedicated to the support and promotion of Independent filmmaking. Under her directorship, the Foundation spawned the Long Island International Film Expo (LIIFE). Heading into its 23rd year, LIIFE enjoys enormous popularity, attracting short and featurelength independent films from around the world, spotlighting films made on Long Island and concluding with a star-studded award celebration. The Foundation also runs the Scared for Your LIIFE short horror festival. An enthusiastic filmmaker herself, Ms. Markowitz, an award-winning writer and director, has acted as Casting Director, consultant, writer, director, actor and producer on movie, television and commercial projects. Her projects include My Cross to Bear (Producer/Casting Director), which screened at the prestigious Academy Award qualifying Rhode Island International Film Festival, Chosen (Director/Producer/ Casting Director) which screened at the Academy Award Qualifying, LA Shorts ,Living with the Dead (Executive Producer/ 216

Casting Director), BIRR (Casting Director/ Producer/Actor),as well as many others. Her personal projects which she wrote, directed, cast and produced include awardwinning short films, The Last Taxi Driver (starring Robert Clohessy from Blue Bloods), Leaving (starring Sal Rendino of Blindspot) and By Blood (featuring Jackie “The Joke Man” Martling) which are all available for viewing on Amazon Prime and have screened on DirecTV. She has two award-winning films on the festival circuit (The Choice and The Waiting Room), one about to hit the festival circuit (Gem and the Photo Op), three films in post (feature film, The Only Woman in the World, pilot, Couple of Guys, short film, Confidant (starring Eddie McGee from 911), and short film, Living Like Kings. She is in pre-production on short film, Just Look Into My Eyes (starring AbigailHawk from Blue Bloods, and Lukas Hassel from Limitless). Debra teaches actors workshops as both director and casting director at the New York Conservatory for the Dramatic Arts and has been a judge on the LaGuardia Arts panel for potential incoming drama students and the Locust Valley High School Student Film Festival. Debra was also a past recipient of the Town of Hempstead’s Woman of Distinction Award. Ms. Markowitz is a proud member of New York Women in Film & Television and Women in Media, is an ex-officio member of the New York Production Alliance and is a member of the Association of Film Commissioners International. She is also a member of the LaGuardia Performing Arts High School Drama and Technical Theater Advisory Board (the FAME high school), a former member of the Discover Long Island Tourism Board and a member of the Westfield International Film Festival.

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Debra is also a freelance writer and novelist. You can find her name on the Long Island Press’ Power List, 50 Long Islanders Who Control Our Lives (2006 and 2012); Beverly Fortune’s, Fortune 52 (2006); as the recipient of the prestigious George M. Estabrook Alumni Award for Distinguished Service (Hofstra University, 2011) and the 2012 Long Island Arts Council honoree as its Outstanding Advocate for the Arts. Debra was one of the originators behind The Master Shift Global Meditation event, which now has over two million followers on Facebook. An avid yoga practitioner and a Reiki healer, Debra lives in Merrick with her husband, and co-manager of Intention Films and Media, John Marean and their faithful rescue dog, Gracie. Debra thank you so much for taking the time to talk with me about your career and your accomplishments. You are a very well acclaimed producer/writer/director/novelist and an inspiration to all women. But let’s start from the very beginning. What inspired you to step into this line of business, the entertainment, and start writing and directing? I always knew that I wanted to be a writer, and wrote my first book when I was six years old. It was never published, but I always felt that I was a writer in my heart. I wrote a few awful feature screenplays, but never did anything with them. I wrote the first novel in my Karmic trilogy, Naked in the Rain, in 2001, and I loved the feedback I got. I know the other two novels in the trilogy (Sarah and Caleb and then Karmic Wind) were written better, but the story still stands. About eight years ago I started casting and producing for others, but then I wrote a little zombie comedy called The Last Taxi

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{ WHAT YOU THINK ABOUT { {INDO HER OWN WORDS SHIFT+CONTROL } } IT? } “An enthusiastic filmmaker herself, Ms. Markowitz, an award-winning writer and director, has acted as Casting Director, consultant, writer, director, actor and producer on movie, television and commercial projects.“

Driver, and I let my friends talk me into directing it. I was a nervous wreck, but once it was over, I never stopped writing screenplays or directing, both my own work and for others.

deals, and we had a great sense of being of service in a field we loved.

To work in the arts, it has to be because you love it, and because you HAVE to do it. You can’t assume you’re going to get fame or fortune, but know that it fills your soul like nothing else.

We were surprised the very first year, and by the third year, we saw a dedicated audience coming to see the films. We also attracted films and filmmakers like Michael Cuesta and his film, LIE. Steve Guttenberg contacted us to show his directorial debut, PS Your Cat is Dead, Ralph Macchio had us screen a couple of his shorts, Love Thy Brother, being the first. Rick Bieber of Radio Flyer and Flatliners fame sent all his indie films to us to screen, proclaiming us his favorite indie film festival.

You are also one of the founder, through the Long Island Film/TV Foundation of the Long Island International Film Expo (LIIFE) which is a very renowned and sought after film festival for independent film makers and that attract every year very known name guests in the entertainment industry and help open the doors to many new and upcoming talented filmmakers and actors. What inspired you to start the film festival and what were your motivation and inspiration behind it. I created the Nassau County Film Office in 1989, and continue to run it today. In 1998, I was approached by Robert Hansen, then the chairman of the Long Island Film-TV Foundation, and he wanted to know if the Nassau County Film Commission wanted to hold a film festival in Nassau County. He introduced me to Anne and Henry Stampfel, who owned several independent theaters in Nassau County, and said we just needed to put our names to it, that he had a team who would do the rest. That didn’t happen. Anne, Henry and I worked like crazy to pull off the first year with only a few months notice. It was more successful than we ever thought it would be, and 23 years later, we’re about to head into the 2020 Long Island International Film Expo aka LIIFE. We just loved the filmmakers and seeing all the incredible independent films that came our way. Back in the day, we helped several filmmakers get distribution

When you first start did you imagine it would become such a great festival?

Did the film festival, during the years, has been all you thought and were hoping for? I’ve been working with Anne and Henry Stampfel since the beginning, and then the man who would become my husband, John Marean, came in 15 years ago, and it has been great to have such a dedicated team. Our closing nights became more elaborate with showing nominee and winners’ clips and having celebrity presenters as well as honorees. We had to make the decision on whether to keep getting bigger, or just try to do what we do well so that we could cater to the true indie filmmakers. We’ve accomplished that. What are the biggest satisfaction and memory and the biggest hurdles about running such a big festival? Our festival team is truly important to me. Our board members are all volunteers, and it has always been our goal to make it about the filmmakers and not about us. When filmmakers come back year after year with new projects and refer others to us, it means we’ve accomplished what we’ve set out to

do. And when a filmmaker has success partially due to having screened at LIIFE, there’s nothing better than that. Stevan Mena, the director of the Malevolence trilogy of films, said he got an important meeting with Lion’s Gate because of having screened at and winning at our festival. Things like that, matter! This year due to COVID\19 the festival had to be moved. Is it still in the plan to have a live festival? And do you expect less affluence due to the current event or do you think people is just ready to get finally out and about? All great questions. We were planning to have a live festival, but the theaters are still not open. We were also planning to hold a drive-in, even booking the location and a company to run it for us, but now new guidelines have been put in place, and while I know that we can adhere to them, we just don’t know if it will happen in time. Because so much is up in the air, we’re finalizing our virtual venue where people can watch the films online if all else fails. Just like the show must go on, LIIFE goes on. People can find out about tickets and venues at www.LongIslandFilm.com I’m pretty certain that attendance will be down, but we know filmmakers are excited to go to a live event, if we can make that happen. We’re continuing to try. Let’s get back to you. If you look in the mirror, who do you see? Who is to you Debra Markowitz? I’m someone who is always looking for balance. When I focus on something, usually writing, or the festival, it’s hard to tear me away from it. There was a year or so that I worked on a new film every three weeks. I’d work on my own projects, and those of others, and while I loved what I was doing, I exhausted myself. I try to space

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{ WHAT YOU THINK ABOUT { IN HER OWN WORDS { DO SHIFT+CONTROL } } IT? } “I always knew that I wanted to be a writer, and wrote my first book when I was six years old. It was never published, but I always felt that I was a writer in my heart.“

out things more these days. I’ve learned to say “no” a lot to practice self-care and get my own work done. I’m also a very spiritual person. I’m a Reiki healer and am studying Native American healing with The Good Medicine society. There’s so much I want to learn, but only so many hours in the day. I try to be a healer with my words, and with my writing and with my movies. I’m someone who cares about the planet and my fellow humans, deeply. And I LOVE dogs!! Is there a movie that you directed or produced that is particularly close to your heart and why? They are all special in different ways. I suppose my two most emotional movies would be my favorites. From Leaving (now on Amazon Prime) and The Waiting Room, which just finished its festival journey, they are the two movies that people come up to me after and tell me how much they meant to them. My job is to touch people, and if I can make people cry, I’ve done that. What are your current projects? I’m currently in post production on my feature film, The Only Woman in the World, and my series, Couple of Guys, of which we are finishing up the third episode. I have two shorts that are bouncing around the festival circuit, Gem and the Photo Op, and Confidant. Information about all of my movies are on my site, www.IntentionFilmsandMedia.com I just finished directing a short for another writer, casting a short for another director and am negotiating with three feature projects to write and/or direct for others. Talk to us about your novels, The reviews are riveting. The stories hot and steamy.

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Where did the inspiration came from? When did you know you had a story to tell? Was the inspiration for your novels coming from your experience or from the myriad of movies that went through your festival? As I said earlier, I knew that I was a writer at heart, but I was working so hard and putting myself through college, and then raising children as a single parent, and then a parent to my daughter and my step-children, and all of the stuff of life just didn’t give me time to write. At one point, I was in danger of losing my film commissioner job due to lay-offs, and I was trying to decide what to do next. I was going to take an intensive paralegal certificate program, but I realized that if I did that, then I would never, ever become the writer that I wanted to be. So I decided that I had six months until I had to sign up for the program, and if I didn’t write before that, that I never would. While vacationing at our small trailer on a nature preserve in Montauk, I started to write, Naked in the Rain. In three weeks, I had the first draft. I was consumed with it. I’d wake up and write notes, grab a pad at lunchtime and write more notes. When I put the kids to bed and before my ex-husband got home (he worked nights), I’d write straight through. Sarah and Caleb came much the same way, though since it took place during the Civil War, I needed to do a lot of research. Once I’d done that research, same thing. Three weeks later, and I had the draft. Karmic Wind took much longer since I was going through a difficult, unanticipated divorce, and I found it very hard to concentrate. It took me years to come up with a story I felt good about. The Karmic Wind trilogy is a present, past and future life story about souls that dance through time to teach each other their karmic lessons. I just invented the characters, fell in love with them, and

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created entire personalities with the stories revolving around them. Do you plan to turn your novel into movies? And why? I completely plan on making the novels into screenplays when time allows. Because they’re relatable, because they touch people, because I believe that the characters deserve to be brought to life and have their stories told How is it different writing a novel and writing a script? What is your routine when you decide to do one or the other? That’s a great question, and I’m not sure I know the answer to it. I’ve been writing screenplays for quite a while now, and I love the medium, but had I not written the Karmic Wind trilogy as novels, no one would have been able to read them. I wrote a novella called Porter’s Way, but decided to change it into a screenplay and look for producers to get it done. My last novel, Damaged, but Not Broken, is probably the most commercial out of all of my work. I have to complete it, but the story is so rich and spans hundreds of years on a journey from Ireland to Italy to Tahiti to all over the United States. I can’t wait to get back to it. I believe that it needs to be a novel first, and then I will turn it into a screenplay. It’s been on hold for quite a while since I started making movies, but I also think that there’s some information that has to hit me that is going to be a special element to the story. I don’t know what it is, but I’ll know when it passes my way. I just listen to my heart, and that tells me what each should be - novel or movie. Which of the two satisfy you the most? I love them both, but I’m going to say movies.

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{ IN HER OWN WORDS }

{ WHAT YOU THINK ABOUT { {INDO HER OWN WORDS SHIFT+CONTROL } } IT? } “To work in the arts, it has to be because you love it, and because you HAVE to do it. You can’t assume you’re going to get fame or fortune, but know that it fills your soul like nothing else.“

What suggestions do you have for a woman or a young girl that would like to follow into your footstep?

If you were to do it all over again, what would you do different, knowing what you know now?

Just do it. If you want to write, write. If you want to direct, direct. But keep your ego out of it. It’s a hard balance when to accept feedback from others, and when to listen to your own heart. An experienced writer you can trust, can give you great feedback, but it doesn’t reflect your personal voice. You also have to understand that humans can do anything. ANYTHING. No one is more special than you, and you are not more special than anyone else. Be prepared to do the work. Work, learn, work some more, find great music to write to, and write, write, write.

Not a thing, lol. I could have started writing earlier, or taken writing and filmmaking in college, BUT, I wouldn’t have had the life experience to have told the stories that I’m able to tell now. I would not have tapped into my spiritual core where a lot of my work is guided by. I believe we come here with contracts and guidelines and we are where we are supposed to be, when we’re supposed to be there. So, I wouldn’t go back in time and change anything, but I’ll make whatever decisions in the future based on what I know now.

You can find Debra in the following social media: http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0548713/ www.IntentionFilmsandMedia.com www.twitter.com/debramarkowitz www.debramarkowitz.blogspot.com www.longislandfilm.com Instagram - @debramarkowitzfilm @ longislandfilmexpo Her books are on sale on Amazon and some of her movie are on Amazon Prime

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THE REMARKABLE LIFE OF RUTH BADER GINSBURG BY KRISTEN BAUER GROSS

Key Learning and Our Next Steps Known as the “Notorious RBG”: A real life superhero! The changes Justice Ruth made in gender and racial equality, advocacy for women’s rights and her trailblazing grit to never give up on things you care about, will live on in our hearts! Ruth Bader Ginsburg: - 2nd woman + 1st Jewish woman to become a Supreme Court Judge. She held her seat longer than any woman 1993-2020.

none would hire her (same situation happened to 1st woman Justice Sandra Day O’Connor who ended up convincing a law firm to hire her for free & to add her to the payroll if they found her work valuable). Ruth accepted a clerkship with a federal judge, and later pursued a career in law through academia. -Ruth’s been heard saying she was determined to do all the things her mother wanted to accomplish but could not. Ruth’s mother, then top of her

- She became a lawyer when women were not wanted in the legal field. Her Harvard Law School class of 550 included just 9 women.

-She transferred to Columbia Law School as her husband graduated a year sooner and got a job in NYC and they moved. She graduated #1 in her class at Columbia! -She applied to every law firm in Manhattan for a job as a lawyer and 228

-Known for changing the way modern American women experience life. RBG is famous for many statements. Three that we can relate to in this moment in history: 1.) “Fight for Things You Care About but Do It in A Way That Will Lead Others to Join You.” 2.) “If You Want to Be A True Professional, You Will Do Something Outside Yourself. Something to repair Tears in Your Community. Something to Make Life A Little Better for People Less Fortunate Than You. That is What I think A Meaningful Life is – Living Not for Oneself, but for one’s community”. 3.) Women Belong in All Places Where Decisions Are Made.

-1st woman to make the Harvard Law Review! -At Harvard her husband fell ill with cancer; she completed his homework nightly so he’d stay on track to graduate all while taking care of their 2 yr old daughter + often starting her own homework at 2am to then sleep just a couple hours.

ever teach at any American Law School.

class, was forced to drop out of school to help her brother complete college. -Never missed a day on the bench even through her 1st 2 bouts of cancer & returned to work day after death of her beloved husband Marty of 56 years. -She hid her 2nd pregnancy in fear she would be let go from her teaching position at Rutgers (she was let go from her first job during her 1st pregnancy as a typist). She was the first woman to

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Ruth spent her life working to progress women’s rights, workplace equality, racial equality and so much more. When asked in her 80’s if she would retire, she is noted saying that she has no intention to retire, her work still excites her and that there is still so much work to be done! We cannot count ourselves as successful unless we are also working to help pull others up along with us. There is room for all of us at the top. Working as a model coach and long-time model and talent (a rare female dominated industry) yet I still witness so much cattiness. I’d love to

{ COACHING WITH KRISTIN } “Known as the “Notorious RBG”: A real life superhero! The changes Justice Ruth made in gender and racial equality, advocacy for women’s rights and her trailblazing grit to never give up on things you care about, will live on in our hearts!”

see the model and talent industry (and women in all industries) continue to move to a “room for all of us at the top” mindset. I work to infuse that motto into my coaching and programs. Everyone is needed to continue Ruth Bader Ginsburg’s work, and the work and progress of countless women and men who have progressed gender and racial equality, kindness, and community development. • VOTE in Elections: Susan B. Anthony, Elizabeth Cady Stanton, Harriett Tubman, and countless other women devoted their efforts to women’s suffrage so we might have the right to own property, right to own ourselves and make decisions about our bodies, right to keep our earnings and right to vote in elections – so let’s make use of our rights and vote. Plan today. Will you attend early voting? What date and what time? Will you vote by absentee mail in voting- send it in ASAP? Are you registered to vote in your current state of residence? • Be Informed, Get Clear on Your Values, and Become Knowledgeable in Community and National Current Events: It is easy to feel overwhelmed and ambivalent or like one person’s actions and vote do not matter. Ruth’s life inspires me and reminds me what one tiny 4’11” woman from modest beginnings can accomplish so much, simply by not giving up.

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• Vote with Dollars: We can each ‘vote’ for what matters to us by spending our hard-earned dollars on products and services important to us, that stand for the change we want to see in the world. This can mean supporting local businesses, family owned businesses, sustainable businesses that pay fair wages, women owned businesses, minority owned businesses. • The Women’s March Starts in Our

Kitchen: I think the pandemic has left many of us re-prioritizing what matters and doing things locally from where we are. We do not have to drive or fly across the country to make change. Small changes build up over time. We must stand up for ourselves. We must share our voices and stories. One of my coaches Sarah Jenks, follow her on Instagram @sarahjenks reminded us in a program she leads called ‘Whole Woman’ that so often we as women, have been brainwashed to be people pleasers, to bend over backwards and not rock the

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boat. But if partners, husbands, and boyfriends in your household are not acting like capable, responsible adults and parents, it’s a big problem. And in the words of Sarah Jenks: “It’s time to stop making excuses and fix this problem. It’s ruining your life. It’s ruining your kids’ lives. It’s ruining his life. Men will not respond to meek requests. They will respond to Standards. Having Standards is the same thing as having a code of ethics one is required to abide by in order to be in your presence.” Kristin Bauer-Gross is a Rochester. NY based Model Coach, Commercial Model and Actress, Speaker and monthly columnist for Rochester Woman. Kristin’s mission “Courage to Dream” motivating women and girls to find the courage to go after their goals and dreams even in the face of naysayers. As a model coach, she has a private coaching practice and also teaches an online program called ACTION which is a career development program for small market models and actors to learn, connect and succeed. RWO readers get a special offer 50% off their first month with code “HALFOFF1STMONTH” at www.KristinB.com/action-program Learn more about Kristin and the ACTION program at www.KristinB.com Follow Kristin Bauer-Gross on Instagram, Facebook, and TikTok @ KristinBauerGross

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WHO IS “BIG VEGG”? BY MICHELLE DIBERNARDO

Sound Engineer | Photographer | Videography | Radio Personality | Correspondent | Humanitarian... Eric “Big Vegg” Sullivan is that guy to go for almost everything you need to get done. From doing Internet radio to running a recording studio to running an interviewing web series to doing photography and videography. He’s that go-to guy for what you need. With 16+ years deep into entertainment, he’s had the chance and honor of working with artists of all genres including; Papoose, Vado, Raekwon, Troy Ave, Sean Price(R.I.P.), Chris Rivers, Droop pop, Cheezey Dior and Coke Boy Brock of French Montana’s Coke Boys group... and then interviewing creatives like Rakim, Brian Angel(Formerly of Day 26), and even Producer extraordinaire Focus. Dj Self, Angela Yee, Super Producer Amadeus, actress Donshea Hopkins and so many more. Eric has even gone to interview pageant winners like former Miss Jersey USA 2018 Chhavi Verg and many up and coming artist of the world. During his venture in getting a Diploma with honors at the now-closed “Institute of Audio Research”. He acquired an internship at Interscope records becoming a member of there street team called The Bombsquad NYC. During this time he was sent out to promote artists such as Carl Thomas, 50 Cent, Common, Daddy Yankee and more under the label. In January 2018, Eric had acquired an internship at New York City’s prime spot for Hip-Hop & R&B “Power 105.1” doing camera work for radio personality “EmEz”, but that venture ended in August of 2018. You can find much of Big Veggs video has contributed to the Power 105’s website.

He’s also been recruited by Paterson’s New Jersey’s own Damian Emile to become one of the prime hosts for the Independent music video show “Music Monday Videos” shining light on independent artists & industry professionals. More recently in December of 2019 he was also recruited by Sirius XM Host Mike Muse to be one of his primary shooters for his Mike Muse show platform. Eric also manages up and

“Big Vegg”:I’ve always been a creative soul through hip hop so that led to me running my own recording studio to starting an Internet radio show to Doing videography & on camera correspondent work. Michelle: What advice would you give people going through hard times? “Big Vegg”: Don’t give up because you could be so close to your break. Plus most times when hurdles are being thrown at you, you bounce back from your setback. Usually that bounce back is something serious and you evolve. You go through things for a reason. So why quit… Michelle: How did Covid-19 affect you? “Big Vegg”: Covid-19 affected me heavily because I’m a freelance videographer so I’m always at the events, the parties, the get togethers etc. Once NY got shut down I was gone for 3 months but that also gave me time to not only rest but get my things in order and regroup on my marketing and promotion of interviews and media so it was a blessing in disguise.

coming Hip-Hop artist “Stillamess” getting him performances all over while also landing him placements in Hip-Hop Weekly, The Source, Thisis50.com and more. He has the drive, the ambition, and the hunger to make a name for himself in entertainment and beyond. Michelle: What inspired you to get in the business or “biz” ?

I met Eric Sullivan “Big Vegg” on the red carpet in NYC years ago and he has such a positive attitude. Very experienced in his field of expertise. If you are looking for anyone to do celebrity interviews in the NYC area, “Big Vegg” is your man! Follow “Big Vegg” on all Social Media Platforms YouTube - Facebook Twitter - Instagram

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THRU THE EYES OF A CHILD BY SHANNON MARIE

The past 6 months have brought about many changes in our world and we have been faced with many difficult decisions. Throughout this time, I began to wonder if anyone ever really took the time to talk to a child and get their insight on what they thought of the situation that they were thrown into, and to hear a child’s viewpoint on how they feel in the world today. A year ago, if you were to sit down and ask a group of students their thoughts and feeling about the start of school, they would have responded with excitement. Maybe one or two would be anxious, or a bit nervous, but most of the students would be looking forward to seeing their friends and the start of a new school year. Hugging teachers from years past, hugging friends that they have not seen in weeks. Sharing stories at lunch or snacks and playing together at recess. Getting your class schedule was always exciting and discovering who else was assigned to your classes. The schools had field trips planned and football games. Homecoming dances and parades. This all seems as of now in New York to now be in the past. We hope temporarily. But for now, this is not in the cards for our upcoming academic school year. I was able to sit down and have a genuinely nice conversation with an upcoming 4th grader. She admitted that she had some concerns about returning to school this fall. This young lady had heard on the news about the different school year plans 234

being set up for different districts. I asked her specifically how she felt about this. Her response froze me. In the words of a 4th grader, “ I feel lost,” Adults are so concerned about the CDC Guidelines that they are forgetting that school is supposed to be a FUN environment where we want to attend and want to learn. I asked her to explain to me a little more about this. She said, “Downtime with your friends is an important part of being a kid. If the same group of kids is together all day long, then why are not allowed to have a bit more freedom within our classroom?” “I understand COVID can be dangerous, but we are kids, we get sick, we are supposed to build our immune systems and get stronger.” I know as adults the concerns and guidelines surrounding COVID change constantly. It is difficult enough for adults to stay on top of the new guidelines and updates, I truly can not imagine a child trying to understand the same. When I was meeting with this student her family was still trying to decide which type of school program she would be enrolling in this fall. They had just returned from touring their school and viewing all the changes. I asked her if she was excited to see her school again. Her response. “At first, I was, then I wasn’t. I could see the cafeteria tables were gone. Desks were in their place. Stickers lined the steps and the sidewalks reminding us to not get close to our friends. Sanitizing stations are everywhere, the constant use really

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dries out my hands, then they hurt. I walked into what should be my classroom for the year, I sat down at my desk and wanted to cry. The desks were all spaced apart, not in groups facing each other as in years past. No fun rugs on the floors, or game areas, no reading lounge, no community art place. I spent about 25 minutes in the classroom with my mom. No air conditioning, no fan, no windows allowed to be opened, and in a mask. I hate these masks. You can’t see smiles on people’s faces, and it is hard to breathe. It got hot in the room fast. I felt hot, dizzy, frustrated. I wanted to cry, I wanted to leave. When we got outside the school, my mom hugged me and told me it would be okay. I told her it’s not okay, I feel TRAPPED.” Trapped. The words of a 4th grader. In reading this article please take a minute and think about how our children are feeling during this pandemic. Education and going to school is their job. There is no changing this for them. As adults, if we do not like the job we are in, we look for another and eventually change jobs. Students do not have that option, as education is essential. In ending my conversation with this student, she asked that I remind everyone to be kind. Children have bad days too. Everyone needs to be more understanding and patient this year as we all head into new and uncharted territory. This has definitely been an eye-opening experience as I listened to the point of view from the eyes of a child.

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CHECK OUT NYSIFF BY MICHELLE DIBERNARDO

Are you looking for something to do Upstate during Covid-19? Who loves a good film? Then you should definitely check out NYSIFF. I have personally been to this film festival and can tell you that they have had an amazing variety of films to choose from. Not only do they showcase amazing films from all over the world but they also offer a pitch past. This helps aspiring and professional filmmakers pitch they’re amazing projects to help them further their goal of making their films happen. Good critique can never hurt someone but will only help them grow. The 5th Annual New York State International Film Festival in conjunction with the Upstate NY Women in Film & TV and Haydenfilms Institute is taking place Virtual, September 25 through October 9. The festival will be screening on the All Abilities Live online platform https://www.allabilitieslive.com/newyork-state-international-film-festival This year’s sponsors include Moda Pictures, Price Chopper & Market 32, Stewart’s Shops and Chronogram Magazine. This year the festival will screen 50 short films that are local, national and international. Some of the New York films include “Selfish” a comedy by Chris O’connell from Albany, NY

and “Here You Are, You Here” an experimental film by Masal Gibson from New York City and “It’s Sunshine” a drama from South Korea film by Kim Seunghwan. The festival will offer different educational panels hosted by the Upstate NY Women in Film & TV, which include: How to Pitch your projects, An Evening with Actress Yolanda Ross of the Chi, Casting Workshop, Screenplay Workshop

and How to get Publicity for Your Film. There will also be a Pitch Fest where filmmakers will submit their projects and during the festival will pitch them to producers. The Film Festival was founded by Nico Altekin based in Albany, NY the festival director in 2016. Nico was a filmmaker before he launched the festival. The festival producer Eric Vollweiler based in Saratoga Springs Area, has been producing and marketing film festivals and entertainment events for over 15 years. His new company www. ffsponsors.com is launching this fall.

Tickets are $14.99 to screen all 50 short films and $75.00 for an allaccess pass, UPWIFT members get %25 off their pass which includes all 50 short films and all panels. The Pitch Fest is a separate event which has an application fee which is $20 and UPWIFT Members can apply for free. https://www.indieshortsmag.com/news/ film-festival/2020/08/new-york-stateinternational-film-festival-goes-onlin e/?fbclid=IwAR3a sbaBc5vbKLYX5 XVHGL6phTR 5G4PWzlpWI5 3MG_N6VXu-_ EmOnBhX5hA Eric Vollweiler helps with so many different projects and now has his business helping with film festival sponsorships. Some other things Eric does are: Producer of the New York State International Film Festival www. nysiff.com Producer of Check the Gate One On One with the Northeast Filmmaker Lab http://www.cinemaexchange.org/ check-the-gate/ https://www.film-fest-report.com/ home/how-to-get-sponsors-for-yourfilm-festival Eric’s direct line is 1- 818-445-4659.

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{ WHAT TO DO UPSTATE } “The Upstate New York chapter of Women in Film & Television (UPWIFT) is a nonprofit, volunteer-based organization that supports women calling the shots in film, television and digital media, energizing the careers of women in entertainment by illuminating their achievements, providing training and professional development, and advocating for equity.”

inspiring place for student filmmakers. They Empower independent and student filmmakers across the globe and our 501(c)3 nonprofit organization. Their vision is to create and Foster an online network of independent and student filmmakers. Provide the support and resources necessary for them to succeed in the film industry. Wow isn’t that pretty amazing. Be 240

sure to check their website at www. HaydenFilmsInstitiute.org. The Upstate New York chapter of Women in Film & Television (UPWIFT) is a non-profit, volunteerbased organization that supports women calling the shots in film, television and digital media, energizing the careers of women in entertainment by illuminating their achievements,

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providing training and professional development, and advocating for equity. Reaching from the base of the Hudson Valley to the crown of the Capital District Region. Interested in becoming a member in something phenomenal for Women in Filmmaking locally? https://www. upwift.org/

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SCALP NEW YORK BY JAROD SCHOONMAKER

Hi my name is Jerod Schoonmaker, Founder of Scalp New York. It’s been my experience that there are few things more damaging and devastating to a persons confidence than hair loss. Whether it’s thinning, balding, or receding hairlines… It s*cks! But unfortunately, the reality is that majority of us will experience some kind of hair loss or thinning at some point in our lives. Androgenetic alopecia or common male pattern baldness (MPB) accounts for more than 95% of hair loss in men. By the age of thirty-five two-thirds of American men will experience some degree of appreciable hair loss, and by the age of fifty approximately 85% of men have significantly thinning hair. A different survey suggests that by age 40, approximately 40 percent of women suffer from hair loss. ... By age 60, approximately 80 percent of women suffer some degree of noticeable hair loss, according to the survey by the International Society of Hair Restoration Surgery. Unfortunately we are living in a society, where who you are – your identity – is closely related to how you look and present yourself. And your hair is a big part of that. So if you’re like most people experiencing

thinning or balding, you might feel that your confidence is being effected on a daily basis. That it’s getting out of your control, because hair loss makes you feel self conscious and insecure. I started loosing my hair at a pretty early age. At first, I tried to cover up my bald spots with different

especially since the result is neither guaranteed nor permanent. So another transplant could be necessary later. Then I researched hair loss reversal drugs, like hormone injections. But quickly discovered how hair loss reversal drugs affected the lives of men. Those pills and treatments come with a risk of severe side effects, like erectile dysfunction, loss of sex drive, loss of energy, and lack of motivation. Some of those side effects are irreversible and can go on even after you stop taking the pills or getting the injections. As I am dedicated to keeping a healthy lifestyle and taking care of my body, I didn’t want to put chemicals into my system. Why would I risk my health, sex life and well-being for a fix with no guarantee it would it solve my issues?

hairstyles and by wearing hats. But as my hair got thinner and thinner it became increasingly difficult to disguise, and my receding hairline was difficult to mask. So I started researching alternative solutions. The first thing that came to mind was a hair transplant. But transplants are excessively expensive,

I asked myself: Is a few extra strands of hair worth those consequences? Just as I was trying to come to terms with my balding head and looking much older than my birth certificate indicates, I discovered Scalp Micropigmentation. SMP is the fastest growing solution to hair loss, because it comes at a much lower price, than transplants, taking pills or applying creams every single

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SHIFT+CONTROL } } { {BUSINESS SPOTLIGHT “Unfortunately we are living in a society, where who you are – your identity – is closely related to how you look and present yourself. ”

day. And it’s the only treatment with a guaranteed result. After not discovering any noteworthy side effects, and reading tons of personal experiences of men who had had success with this solution, I decided to try it myself… To be completely honest: At first I was afraid I would get negative comments. That people would tell me it looked fake or that I looked ridiculous… But I didn’t receive any negative remarks – I actually got compliments! People who don’t 246

know me, think it’s my natural hair. Getting a scalp micropigmentation has been one of the best decisions I’ve ever made. It changed my life for the better, making me more happy and confident than I had been for years. “I suddenly felt free. I felt less controlled by my look. I didn’t have to worry about how people perceived me anymore.” And because I believe SMP has brought me to where I am at today; freed of my insecurities, and made me much more confident as a man. I decided to try to make this long

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term sustainable solution available to as many people as possible. I believe that everyone have the right to be comfortable in themselves and have the self-esteem to achieve what they want from life. So if we can help with that through providing a safe and permanent solution to recreate receding hairlines and restore the appearance of a full set of hair, my mission is accomplished!

SHIFT+CONTROL } } { {BUSINESS SPOTLIGHT “Getting a scalp micropigmentation has been one of the best decisions I’ve ever made. It changed my life for the better, making me more happy and confident than I had been for years.”

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HELPING MEN AND WOMEN WHO ARE SUFFERING FROM HAIR LOSS, SCARS, AND FORMS OF ALOPECIA BECOME BETTER VERSIONS OF THEMSELVES THROUGH SCALP MICROPIGMENTATION.

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JUMPING FOR JOY? MAYBE NOT THIS YEAR. BY SHANNON HOLMES

With the start of the new school year closing in, so many of us have different views, opinions, and concerns. Bottom line. It’s okay. As parents, we are all in uncharted waters. Unanswered questions, new schedules, new concepts, and new guidelines are going to all be all around us this school year. Before you let the stress of all of this consume you, PLEASE, count to ten. Breathe. Remember your reaction to the situations being presented will be seen and heard by your child(ren). Your emotions and how you speak about people, (teachers, classmates, staff, etc) will be absorbed by your child(ren). They feed off, of our emotions. Shower them with positivity. The education and growth of our children is the common bond we all have as parents. Let’s keep that in mind as we brace ourselves for a unique year of learning and new experiences. Keep an open mind, we may be surprised, and in a good way. If you have decided on in-person learning, virtual, homeschool, or hybrid, Congratulations. You have 250

made the best decision you can for your family. As a parental community, we need to pool together our resources and HELP each other to overcome these new challenges we face. My grandmother used to say, “It takes a village to raise a child.” In today’s world, I believe it takes a full community. Thanks to the use of social media we are lucky to have help

at our fingertips. A few suggestions: 1. Create/ Join a community Facebook support group 2. Moms of students in (school district grades) create a private page to help with assignments 3. Community Activity Boards

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4. Youth Activity Groups (small groups can social distance easily) At the end of the day, everyone needs to remember that COVID-19 has affected people differently. For those that have lost loved ones, prayers. For those that have recovered, stay healthy. People that have been unaffected, stay safe. Everyone is entitled to their own personal thoughts and feelings on this pandemic, and with that being said; being RESPECTFUL of that thought will help in moving us forward as a society united. It’s okay to agree to disagree, but still, do it with respect. As we move forward into this school year, remember to breathe, be respectful, and understanding. Ask for help when you feel overwhelmed. It’s okay to ask for it, it doesn’t mean you are any less of a parent, guardian, or teacher. We are not perfect, we are only human and yes, we all make mistakes.

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TEEN TALK WITH GABBY BY GABRIELLE EDEN

Hello, let me introduce myself, my name is Gabrielle Eden. I am a teenage actress, singer, and writer. I love performing on stage and working on movies in Syracuse, New York. I sing Broadway show tunes for concerts and Nursing Homes of my local area (Obviously before the quarantine), and I was writing poems for my school newspaper before the schools were shut down. What I want to accomplish in my life in the future is getting the role of “Christen Daáe” from my favorite show “The Phantom of The Opera” and maybe publishing a few fictional books of my own. Anyway, welcome all to Teen Talk! As a teenager in a pandemic, one thing has been on my mind ever since we were locked inside our houses: School. Back in March, I was at my Grandparents house when we got the call that school was closed and we would not go back until May. But what would happen then? How would the teachers know we were doing our work? Would anyone care to do homeschooling? So many questions came to my head. I was so glad our teachers told us to bring our supplies home. They told the students about their plans for homeschooling. Some would give us a ton of work, others would take it easy on us. But my main 252

concern was “how am I going to do my music through Homeschooling?”. I later learned that some of the teachers were going to teach through video chat. I’m going to be totally honest, I am not great with technology and I had no idea how to do a video chat. In fact, I never thought I was ever going to use it!

My very first video chat was at eleventhirty with my algebra teacher the following Tuesday. I was very nervous, I had no idea how to use it. I had not cleaned my room, so I did it on my bed. I put my hair in a ponytail so I didn’t give the impression that I wasn’t sleeping instead of doing my work. The minutes ticked by, I was getting

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more nervous that no one cared to show up. Finally, eleven-thirty: time for algebra. I clicked onto the “join” button and (surprise, surprise) I was the first one to join the class. It was really great to see my algebra teacher safe in her home. Slowly but surely, the students came to class (Most of them anyway) and it went on like normal. After class ended, I said to myself “That wasn’t bad at all!”. A wave of relief that I finished my very first video chat swept over me. After a while, I got the hang of it, I even taught my little brother how to use it! Every day before she started the lesson, she would always fill us in on what was happening with the schools during COVID. As we reached May, they closed school yet again into the next month. I could hear myself thinking “What the heck?!” (I say “heck” because I don’t like swearing). I was really excited to see my teachers again for when we did go back, especially my chorus and music teachers. They were talking about a virtual concert where we record our songs and edit them together. I really hoped that was not the case, but it was. Not going to lie, it was really cool to hear ourselves on recordings like that. After a month, the school finally closed for the rest of the school year. It didn’t come as a shock, but I was not happy about it either. I’m sure I wasn’t the only one not happy

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“ What I want to accomplish in my life in the future is getting the role of “Christen Daáe” from my favorite show “The Phantom of The Opera” and maybe publishing a few fictional books of my own.”

{ TEEN TALK } “As a teenager in a pandemic, one thing has been on my mind ever since we were locked inside our houses: School.”

about it either. I’m sure I wasn’t the only one not happy about it either. My brother was really going crazy not being able to talk to his friends. But rumors started to form about school after the summer. One rumor was that some of us will go to school on Monday through Wednesday and the others went to school Thursday through Saturday. First reaction: absolutely not! No one wants to 256

go to school on Saturday! Another rumor was that some of us would go to school while others did video chats with the class in school. But honestly, I stopped listening for two reasons. One: I want to find out by the school what’s going on. Two: I don’t want to panic about anything to do with school. But needless to say, I really didn’t want to hear any more rumors. Personally, I just want to go back to

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school with my music teachers and do my music lessons again. I’m sure we just want to go back so we can do the activities or subjects we love the most. Thank you all for joining me today on Teen Talk.

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INTRODUCING SAVON SPEAKS BY SAVON HOLT

My name is Savon Holt. I am from Rochester, NY, been here all my life. I am a single mother of one. I have worked in healthcare for over 16 years. I am gradually navigating my way through the healthcare industry. After my son was born. After my son was born, I worked as a Direct Support Professional for two years. A short time after I received my certification for Certified Nursing Assistant (C.N.A). However, still navigating through the healthcare field, I went back to school in 2010 to attain my license as a Licensed Practical Nurse (LPN). Today, I have been working in this career field as an LPN for ten years now, providing skilled nursing to nursing facilities all over Rochester and residential care settings. I hold an associate degree in / Liberal Arts and Science. While, currently working in the healthcare field, I put myself through college for a second time, now a graduate of Roberts Wesleyan College with my Bachelor of Science in Healthcare Administration. My goal is to become a Healthcare Attorney while still pursuing Entrepreneurship. I feel my purpose is to help take care of individuals in need, hence is one of the main reasons I became a nurse. My dedication to my clients shows how serious I take my role. I consider my task to be a sacred trust in protecting and caring for my patients even without any personal attachment. Outside of the clinical setting, I felt there were many ways 258

to help others, which is why I became a mentor, certified Life Coach, Founder of Graced by Wisdom Foundation Inc., and launched SavonSpeaks. Graced by Wisdom Foundation Inc. is a 501c (3) organization in upstate New York that uses civic leadership, community investment, and philanthropy to improve life quality in low-income areas. Our

life they deserve. We encourage ladies who have experienced adversities and life setbacks to rebuild and get back to their destined lives. We offer Speaking Mentoring and Coaching Services. We recently partnered with the Rochester City School District to mentor several high school girls to work on confidence building, personal development, college and career preparation, and much more. As a Licensed Practical Nurse, podcaster, mentor, life coach, entrepreneur, author, and mother of one wonderful son, I had a life full of obstacles to overcome, just like many women. Being a teen mother has benefited me more than what I have expected. I know how it feels to be a woman that wants to strive for more but is scared of her past.

mission is to help low socioeconomic status African American families access needed cardiac and diabetes medications to improve health disparities while decreasing financial stress. Graced by Wisdom will relaunch in 2021. SavonSpeaks organization is established to motivate and empower women in finding their purpose. We aim to help them find their purpose and live the

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I was once in their shoes. My limiting beliefs had several negative effects on me. However, after rebuilding myself and separating my present from my past, I had to relearn myself through my brokenness to create a brighter future. I had faced different troubles, such as: • Molestation • Passing of mother at 15 • Teen Mom • Absentee Father • Failed relationships • Low Self-esteem

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“I believe providing the opportunity for other women to share their Blueprint to success will motivate and empower other women experiencing similar challenges. However, I want those facing adversities and setbacks to know there is light at the end of the tunnel and not give up.”

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SAVON SPEAKS SHIFT+CONTROL { {{SHE HUSTLES TALKS}}} “On my podcast, I encourage other “successful” women to tell their stories of past challenges they have overcome on their journey to success.”

• Verbal abuse • Suicidal Ideation • Depression • Bereavement & Grief However, I knew that life would get better if I were loyal and obedient to myself. Like me, having a tunnel vision, surrounding yourself with positive people, and knowing the importance of perseverance helped me create the peaceful life I needed. On my podcast, I encourage other “successful” women to tell their stories of past challenges they have overcome

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on their journey to success. I believe providing the opportunity for other women to share their Blueprint to success will motivate and empower other women experiencing similar challenges. However, I want those facing adversities and setbacks to know there is light at the end of the tunnel and not give up. People often associate success with monetary things. But I let women know success can be simple as learning how to master keeping your inner peace. Success is merely a goal you set for yourself that you successfully achieved. The material things are a reward to

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yourself after achieving something you’ve completed. Society has misconstrued the true definition of success. In my book that I will be releasing this year called My Truth, it is a Memoir of my past challenges that I turned into my purpose, which has allowed me to feel and be successful. However, hopefully, my book My Truth will help inspire someone to allow their hurt to be the fuel to starting their success story. It’s all about changing your mindset and stop focusing on the “Why” things happen to you but “What” can you do to change it so that the cycle is broken.

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SELF-CARE, SELF-LOVE AND SEXUAL SATISFACTION BY MADILYNN RUTHERFORD

Historically, as women, we have often been the caretakers for the people in our lives. We are not just sisters, daughters, wives, friends, employees and bosses, but often we are also mediators, “therapists,” schedule keepers, housekeepers and more. We care for the people in our lives in a variety of ways on a daily basis, but how much time do we spend caring for ourselves? I am talking about a term that has become quite popular: self-care. People usually imagine face masks, bubble baths and glasses of wine when someone mentions selfcare, but true self-care goes beyond relaxing activities. Self-care is the act of building a life and relationship with yourself through daily actions and choices that prioritize your health and wellbeing.

Physical care is the component of selfcare that focuses on our physiological needs. These needs can include drinking enough water, incorporating some form of physical activity into your weekly routine, and eating a balanced, nutritious diet.

Dr. Cook-Cottone and Dr. Guyker, authors of a 2018 paper in Mindfulness, define self-care as the process of being aware of and taking care of your basic physiological and emotional needs. They developed the Mindful Self-Care scale, a tool for measuring self-care behaviors across six domains: mindful relaxation, physical care, self-compassion and purpose, supportive relationships, supportive structure and mindful awareness.

SUPPORTIVE RELATIONSHIPS The domain of supportive relationships concerns being aware of the health of your relationships and the amount of support you’re receiving from the people in your life. Are you spending time with your loved ones? Are you feeling supported and respected by your loved ones?

MINDFUL RELAXATION The first domain, mindful relaxation, seeks to assess how you are relaxing your mind and body with presentmoment sensations on a weekly basis. You might self-soothe by meditating, or possibly through reading a book and listening to calming music at the end of a busy work day. PHYSICAL CARE

S E L F - CO M PA S S I O N A N D PURPOSE The domain of self-compassion and purpose examines whether you are treating yourself with kindness and finding a greater sense of purpose in life. Are you engaging in compassionate self-talk? Are you allowing yourself to feel your feelings, even when they are difficult? Are you experiencing meaning and purpose in the different areas of your life?

SUPPORTIVE STRUCTURE The next domain is supportive structure which concerns the environmental and structural factors of your daily life. Are you maintaining a comfortable living environment and work environment? Are you maintaining a schedule that is manageable for you? MINDFUL AWARENESS Lastly, there is the domain of mindful awareness. This entails being presently and calmly aware of your thoughts, feelings and bodily sensations and

using them to guide your daily actions. Now t h a t we h a ve a g re a t e r understanding of some of the domains that self-care can encompass, how does the care we provide for ourselves impact important life factors, such as our sexual satisfaction? Improving selfcare has been shown to reduce stress and burnout, increase wellbeing and leads to more positive daily moods, which are all factors that can impact our sexual satisfaction. Taking care of ourselves is an act of radical self-love. As women, it’s also an act of radical self-love to cherish and accept our bodies. Starting at a young age, women are bombarded with messages about their bodies. From social media to marketing campaigns, to relatives obsessively talking about new diet trends during holiday dinners, the message is clear: Your body is only acceptable if it looks a certain way. This leads to women feeling insecure and ashamed of their bodies when they deviate from the thin “ideal” body type so often described. Both research and clinical experiences have shown that body image impacts women’s sexual satisfaction. If you are overwhelmed with negative thoughts about your body during sexual activities, such as “I hope they don’t notice my cellulite” or “I look terrible from this angle,” you are no longer focused on feeling and enjoying the present mental and physical sensations of sex. This idea was coined as “spectatoring” by Masters and Johnson (1970), which is the process of focusing on yourself during a sexual activity rather than focusing on the sensations and your partner (if a partner is present).

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{ SEXUALLY { SHIFT+CONTROL SPEAKING} } “We are not just sisters, daughters, wives, friends, employees and bosses, but often we are also mediators, “therapists,” schedule keepers, housekeepers and more.”

So, how can a therapist help someone struggling with self-care, self-love and, consequently, sexual satisfaction? To demonstrate this, let’s imagine a client. Lisa is a 38-year old lawyer. She is the mother of two young children and has been married for over 10 years. Between a consuming career and raising her children, she does not spend time focusing on herself. She is often overwhelmed and stressed, which she believes has impacted her ability to enjoy and crave sex with her partner. She also expresses feelings of insecurity towards her body. Whereas she once felt confident about her perceived sexual attractiveness and was often excited to have sex, she now avoids it. When she does have sex with her partner, she keeps the lights off and usually is too consumed with thoughts of work, family and bodily insecurities, which impact her ability to be present with her partner and enjoy the sexual activities. In order to help Lisa regain sexual satisfaction, a therapist might focus on helping her find a more balanced lifestyle where she is able to practice self-care. This might start with teaching Lisa about the different aspects of self-care and then helping her navigate ways in which she can incorporate these into her daily routines. The therapist should also focus on helping Lisa develop selfcompassion and love towards her body at its present state. Through the lens of feminist therapy, this could mean helping Lisa deconstruct her learned cultural narratives about what women’s bodies should look like and instead develop a compassionate outlook on the beauty of all bodies, no matter what size or shape. 268

Lastly, a therapist could help Lisa develop tools such as mindfulness in order to be more present during her sexual experiences and able to focus on the wonderful sensations and her partner. With time, patience and support, Lisa may begin to notice a boost in her daily moods, a reduction in stress and an improvement in her emotional and sexual connection with her partner. Madilynn Rutherford is a Counseling Psychology PhD student at the University at Buffalo and an intern sex therapist at the Rochester Center for Sexual Wellness. She believes that your sexual wellness is an essential component of your holistic self-care. Madilynn works with clients from all walks of life to navigate their way to a happier, healthier state of being. If you would like to see Madilynn yourself, please contact her at the Rochester Center for Sexual Wellness at 585-865-3584 or Madilynn@ rochestercenterforsexualwellness.com. Citations: Castellini, G., Sauro, C. L., Ricca, V., & Rellini, A. H. (2017). Body esteem as a common factor of a tendency toward binge eating and sexual dissatisfaction among women: the role of dissociation and stress response during sex. The Journal of Sexual Medicine, 14(8), 1036-1045. Cook-Cottone, C. P., & Guyker, W. M. (2018). The development and validation of the Mindful Self-Care Scale (MSCS): An assessment of practices that support positive embodiment. Mindfulness, 9(1), 161-175.

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Masters, W. H., & Johnson, V. E. (1970). Human sexual inadequacy, Boston (Little, Brown & Company) 1970. Pujols, Y., Meston, C. M., & Seal, B. N. (2010). The association between sexual satisfaction and body image in women. The journal of sexual medicine, 7(2), 905-916.

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SEX* *NOW THAT WE HAVE YOUR ATTENTION...

Announcing Western New Yorkâ€™s first comprehensive resource for sexual and relationship wellness and menopause medicine.

Introducing the Rochester Center for Sexual Wellness where sexual medicine specialists and certified sex therapists offer a holistic approach to sexual and relationship wellness. Offering confidential and open-minded care to people of all genders and sexualities that is specifically designed to help YOU meet YOUR GOALS. Also, featuring a nationally certified menopause medicine specialist to help make mid-life your BEST LIFE

CALL US AT 585-865-3584 FIND OUT MORE AT WWW.ROCHESTERCENTERFORSEXUALWELLNESS.COM

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SO YOU WANT TO BE AN ENTREPRENEUR HUH? BY SHERIDONNA F. WILSON

Have you decided yet ? If you are reading this article let’s say you decide Yes! Ok then let ‘s dive deep. First things first, what will you sell ? Products or service or both? Why? What problem are you solving? What makes you want to start your business? What makes your business special? What is the name of your business? What structure will your business have Sole Proprietorship, LLC, Incorporation, B-corps S-corp etc? Will you have a brick and mortar or e-commerce or both? Who are you? What are your expertise? Who will you serve? What is the value of doing business with your brand ? How will your audience work with you? How will you tell your story?

is a lot. You are exactly right. It is a lot. An Entrepreneur’s mission is to “Illustrate their Vision” Your job is to build nothing into something that is valuable to the world. Do you have what it takes to create from nothing? Do you have something in your heart that must be shared with the world? Remember during your journey of Entrepreneurship focus on your transformation to becoming your greatest version. There will always be

Will you use traditional or nontraditional methods to reach your audience? Will you be the face of your brand or nah? Will you have a team? Can you afford a team when you first start out? Will this be a one person race when you first start? Will you get funding from your friends or family or will you fund yourself ? From my experience It is very rare that entrepreneurs get help from friends and family, so don’t hold your breath, and it is ok if they don’t. Everyone plays a position in your life, just put them in the correct category. The people who are supposed to support you will come to you when you put in the work, so on your journey get used to having your soul tribe support you. A wise man we call TD Jakes once said there are only three types of supporters: one is a “Distant supporters”, two “Designated Supporters”, and three “Devine Supporters”. You will need all three, because they are equally important to you. I will break this down at a later time. I know what you are thinking wow! this

lessons, learn from them and grow. Everyone is not your family. Don’t get caught up in other people’s drama. How people treat you is their karma, how you respond is yours. Remember to always give yourself value even though you will be in the dirt. Focus on you. Never let anyone take away your smile. My mentor Ralph Smart told me don’t allow a temporary situation to be a permanent feeling. Wow! repeat this statement twice. This too shall pass.

You will rise after adversity, then create your peace. I said all that, because on your journey to greatness people will TRY, to mistreat you. Remember, I said TRY. You must have tough skin, no one can do anything until you allow it. Never allow anyone to take away your smile. If you are a chosen star seed you came to shine bright. No one can break you if they never made you. Stand tall for your rights and vision. “You have the power to say NO’ to people who try to make you feel bad. This is the information that they don’t teach you in entrepreneurship or business school. I know because I went to Syracuse University Martin Whitman School of Business and Management. This is life changing information that I have learned from real life experience that I am now sharing with you. So let’s talk about what to expect. Now let’s talk about when you start to manifest your vision of what will happen. You will start to become enlightened. Remember in my last article I mentioned a baby takes nine month and to be patient. So when your baby finally arrives how amazing you feel, but just like a mom has issues understanding and learning about motherhood. Entrepreneurs have to learn how to manage, nurture, groom, love and your baby (Your Vision). New moms don’t allow strangers to hold their baby, same things apply: keep your baby in good hands at all times. You have to look out for vouchers and people that don’t care for your well being. Life can be very unpredictable. I have learned going slow is a privilege if you want to have sustainability. I don’t want a microwave career. I want a home cook meal.

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{ DIARY OF A FASHIONISTA } { SHIFT+CONTROL } “Remember, people buy into the person first, than the brand. So you must know who you are.”

Remember when you are preparing a delicious home cook soup it takes time and great preparation. You must cut up all your seasonings, ingredients, and put it in the pot one at a time to have everything just right. One bad judgment like turning up the fire when it’s supposed to be on low will cost you your whole meal. When you are hungry you cannot afford to start all over, two you cannot afford to start all over lol. What I am saying is take your time with your vision like it’s your baby. Be gentle and careful when handling your vision. Don’t allow other people in your kitchen to cook your original vegetarian soup you created when they never Don’t allow other people in your kitchen to cook your original vegetarian soup you created when they never cook this meal a day in their life. Other people will not know what it’s supposed to taste like, or what ingredients to use or how to cook it. Only YOU THE HEAD MOM CHEF knows that. You are the HEAD MOM CHEF! lead with grace, style, precision, confidence, and most importantly be humble on your journey. Your baby, and your soup will be magnificent. How do I know all this information, I have been growing in the dirt. I am like a plant. I was planted years ago and now it’s 274

time to share my harvest with the world. My community from New York, Jamaica, Maryland, Washington DC and all over the world has selected me to grow, because I was a promising seed from the germination stage. I am happy, blessed and highly favored that I can write this article to share my

love and support from the universe. To become a successful Entrepreneur one must work on oneself from the inside out. I have done a lot of soul searching, self reflection, and self-preservation. Yes, your success is determined by you. Think positively about yourself. Good thoughts will start reflecting back to you.

thoughts, ideas, experiences, and knowledge with the world. The universe has nurtured me, water me, fed me, and pruned me, to become a beautiful andfruitful tree, so I can feed others in a time of need. Even though I have received a tremendous amount of

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Remember, people buy into the person first, than the brand. So you must know who you are. The Entrepreneurship journey can be very lonely, nevertheless this is one of the sacrifices that has to be made to find out who you are and why you’re doing this difficult, crazy, challenging, thought provoking, thrilling, fulfilling, unpredictable journey. Only a true star seed can handle the rocky road of entrepreneurship. Like I said in my last article Entrepreneurship is not for everyone. You must be passionate, consistent, diligent, patient about when you are fighting for what you want. Yes, you have to fight for what is yours at all times. A great man that goes by the name Kobe Bryant once said don’t stop when you are tired, stop when you are done. To be continued!!!!!

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ENTERTAIN. EDUA

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O N N A ' S HIONISTA !

CATE.INSPIRE.

RTISE WITH US?

DAY

Sheridonna @youtube

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WHAT DOES ENERGY MEAN TO YOU? BY JENNAFER PASCARELLA

What does energy mean to you? This is a question I asked my social media platform. Where I received a lot of different answers, not one of them wrong. Most of the parents stating their lack of energy or that their child has all of it. Some answers were solar energy, National Grid and then there was the answer that I felt Divine Feminine Energy. There are all sorts of energies lingering around us and within us, good, light, bad, dark, and everything in between. The divine feminine is the one who finds the path of freedom within loving oneself. Have you ever w o n d e re d w h e re your child got all their energy? Really truly thought about when you lost yours? Did you lose it or do you think maybe it’s just taking a break like you are? Children are resilient, sometimes naive, yet very intelligent and I don’t think we truly understand how much our energy or lack of effects their childhood. Think back to when you were a child and try to remember a time where you were full of love and life; then think about a time where someone tried to steal your light. How did it make you feel? Did you allow this person to make you feel 278

bad? Did you allow fear to change you? Or did you push through and tell yourself to keep going? We all have a choice every minute of every day to allow the negative to take over or to push throughout in the work and create more positivity. We happen to lose a lot of people at

and allowed people to walk all over me. I allowed the people around me to talk down to me, to make me feel less than deserving. I allowed them to take my energy, my light. I guess I didn’t mind sharing, nor did I realize my light was being stolen. Every day I was a little dimmer; until one day my light was out. I was lost alone and had no idea what I was going to do. Twenty years young with a 2-month-old baby girl and an abusive boyfriend. I knew for my daughter I had to find my light again. I truly believe we are groomed to become who we are by everything we go through. We can choose to fade away into the darkness using drugs as a crutch or we can do a total energy reset and find the light we lost.

“push through and put in the work” it becomes too hard for them. They do not believe in themselves. They become so comfortable in the dark and cannot see to get out. Which is usually when someone falls into addiction. For years I repeated the same cycle

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You see for those of us who are the light it never goes out all the way, there is a little flame in the heart like a pilot light ready to ignite at any minute. Every day is a new chance to create the life we love. New situations don’t deserve old energy! Cut off anything that holds you down. We only have one life to live, why struggle? Why not use all the resources around us to make the best of every day!

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{SHIFT+CONTROL ENERGY RESET {{ SHE HUSTLES TALKS} }} “Wake up every morning with a positive outlook. Drink a glass of water, Meditate, set goals, and find time to exercise. Be in nature, PUT IN THE WORK.”

“Earth, water, fire, wind where there is energy there is life.” Suzy Kassem, Rise Up and Salute the sun: There is energy in everything. I’ve been researching crystals and carrying them with me or I will wear them to help filter the negative energies that surround me. I make sure to cleanse myself and my house with my palo santo and I spend a huge amount of time in the water, whether its the lake, ocean, pool or even taking a bath so I can recharge. I will run around barefoot to ground

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and become one with the earth. Being an empath is not easy, especially trying to deal with grounding, shielding, and protecting your own energies and not trying to take in others. Be willing to learn and try new things so that you can take care of yourself. Understand that sometimes less is more. Wake up every morning with a positive outlook. Drink a glass of water, Meditate, set goals, and find time to exercise. Be in nature, PUT IN THE WORK. Make

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the changes you want to create a better life. Don’t just settle and be mediocre because it’s easy. follow your heart, reclaim your energy, and become the best you can be with everything that you go through. Find your divine feminine energy, look deep within love yourself and the life you manifest.

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JOJOâ€™S

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THE MIDDLE OF THE ENDLESS MOUNTAINS BY JOHNNY WILLIAMS

Atop a secluded hill in the middle of the Endless Mountains – and across from a Weis Supermarket – sit two animal shelters, both sharing the Animal Care Sanctuary name. Unassuming, modest, maybe even lonely, these two locations are quiet and barely noticeable to the random passersby – save for the signs at the base of each driveway.

a dog meat farm in South Korea, who finally found love two weeks before passing away from an inoperable tumor. There was also Bullitt the cat, who was with ACS for over a decade before finding his forever home, as well as sweet Maria, who was rescued from a hoarding situation and also waited over 10 years to find a loving home.

But these two locations – the “shelter on the hill” in East Smithfield, Pa. and the Victorian-stylehome-turned-shelter in Wellsboro, Pa. have a web of connections that spans the world. We’re on the brink of finding 1,000 animals their forever homes this year alone, and while all of these cats and dogs as well as their new families are unique and special, Animal Care Sanctuary has had many truly amazing stories this year. Readers of Rochester Woman Online are probably familiar with several these stories already. There was Jolene the super dog mom, who was found pregnant and stricken with cancer on an abandoned farm in upstate New York. She not only defeated her cancer, she had six healthy puppies and insisted on nursing them herself, and they have all since found happy, forever homes. Then there was the bittersweet story of JaBee, the sweet canine rescued from

These are stories that have happened only in the last six months, and there will certainly be many more stories to tell. ACS has rescued animals from natural disaster zones and areas of animal crises all over the country, including Rochester, Philadelphia, New Jersey, Texas, Tennessee, Louisiana and even Puerto Rico and Saint Martin. ACS has also had adopters come from as far away as Canada just to take home that special furry friend.

While our paw print across the country continues to grow, we’re excited to begin a new chapter in October as we open our new state-of-the-art kennel and clinic to both the local community and all the rescues that are taken in from all over the United States. This new facility will greatly improve our quality of care and efficiency for our rescued animals. The canine runs will be separated by concrete walls instead of fencing, which will better separate dogs and reduce noise – leading to decreased stress and happier canines. The kennel will also feature meet-and-greet rooms where individuals and families can meet with dogs privately in a home-like setting to better gauge whether the canine could be the right fit for them. Meanwhile, the clinic, which has been operating out of a cramped trailer since it was started, will massively improve the working conditions of our vet staff. In addition to simply having much more space, multiple operating rooms will ensure quicker, more efficient procedures and improved care for both our rescues and our community seeking spay/neuter surgeries, wellness exams and vaccine administration. This new facility has been 10 years in the making. Chief Executive Officer Joan

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{ THE ANIMAL CARE CORNER { ANIMAL CARE CORNER } } “Atop a secluded hill in the middle of the Endless Mountains – and across from a Weis Supermarket – sit two animal shelters, both sharing the Animal Care Sanctuary name.”

Smith-Reese recognized the exceptional need for the building since she joined

begin, as the new kennel and clinic – at long last – be open and operating.

making the world a better place for all of our furry friends.

ACS, and it has been her main mission throughout her decade of dedication to the sanctuary. Through donations, grants, hustle and hard work, SmithReese spearheaded an organization-wide effort to make this vision a reality.

We are beyond excited to start this new chapter at ACS, and we are even more excited by what it means to our animals and our communities – both locally and abroad. We have never given up on our animals and our supporters, and our supporters have never given up on us. Thanks to all of us together, we’re

While the new facility is on the cusp of completion, we would still greatly appreciate any donations towards the cost of the building. You can learn more at www.animalcaresanctuary.org.

And on Oct. 10, this new chapter will

Make a Gift Tax-Free with an IRA Donate to Help Animal Care Sanctuary and Save On Taxes at the Same Time If you are 70½ years old or older, you can take advantage of a simple way to benefit Animal Care Sanctuary and receive tax benefits in return. You can give any amount up to $100,000 per year from your IRA directly to a qualified charity such as ours without having to pay income tax on the money. This popular gift option is commonly called the IRA charitable rollover, but you may also see it referred to as a qualified charitable distribution, or QCD for short. The most important stipulation of donating from your IRA is that you must not withdraw your gift into another one of your personal accounts. Your gift must be transferred directly from the custodian of your IRA to Animal Care Sanctuary. SECURE Act of 2019 Although the SECURE Act of 2019 raised the age for the required minimum distribution from 70.5 to 72, the rules regarding the Qualified Charitable Distributions have not changed. An IRA owner at age 70.5 or older can still give by making a qualified charitable distribution from an IRA. In other words, a 71-year-old IRA owner can make a qualified charitable distribution from an IRA even though a distribution may not be required at that age. Tax Benefits For those who are eligible (age 70.5+), a qualified charitable distribution from an IRA is a tax-wise giving strategy. The QCD amount is not counted as income, which means no tax is due. How to Get Started •

Contact Trish Callahan Murzyn at 610-331-4421 or tcallahan@animalcaresanctuary.org for more information on an IRA gift to ACS.

•

Seek the advice of your financial advisor.

•

Ask your IRA administrator about making a direct transfer to Animal Care Sanctuary or have the administrator send a check from your account to us. To be tax free, the donation must go directly from your account to ACS without passing through your hands.

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AMIDST THE CHAOS BY DENISE “KARMA” CLIFFORD

Over half my life has been about taking care of someone else, my conversations seemed to revolve around how to raise my kids. I can not deny that in the thick of things you think you’re doing most everything right. You feel like raising them is a job that will never end. That is until you wake up the week your middle child is turning 18, your youngest 16. And you wonder even what the oldest one who is 23 and adulting 12 hours away is doing right now.

a child myself, yet I always had more to learn. I was too wrapped up in thinking I needed to make sure my own children’s future would be adults who had the skills in life they needed. Self control, a sense of pride, empathy, a multitude of traits I decided I personally would be able to instil, because I choose to. I decided when my second child was on the way to drop out of the program I was in at a local college, to slowly step away from the career in the health feild I

What used to be days filled with waking up to cook breakfast for 10 kids, sending 4 off on the school bus, and not only keeping yours alive all day, but the others who came to know your home as theirs five days a week, to now sitting alone in a house filled with silent laughter buried deep within the walls I hear no more. The glitter and glue spots from crafts I have kept as the treasures I sometimes rummage through and shed tears for, have worn away. No more of a reminder that tomorrow I’ll wake up and do it all again. Amid the chaos is where we learned our best lessons. “He won’t share with me” or “she hit me” we’re daily reminders that I had to instill the personality traits for self awareness and self control. My days were overwhelmed with controlling the environment to teach the young minds how to wait for a turn. That sharing isn’t about just giving away your turn, it’s also about waiting. We had to learn that emotions shouldn’t be acted on in anger, and look for ways to express our anger that didn’t hurt someone else. It was within these lessons I also tried to teach myself. I learned a lot about the things I had no control over as 288

was pursuing, and open my own in home licensed daycare. I spent the time I wasn’t at work, getting licensed, and when my second child was 5 days old and my oldest was just stepping onto the bus for half day kindergarten, I opened my doors for daycare. I opened my house for years of children who would become family. To me, my children and even our neighbors. I still remember the first four children who began this

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journey with me. I remember that my oldest would nap after school on a mat alongside the other kids. I still remember thinking how bad of a mom I was because I had to put Roan upstairs in his crib and close the door. Because he cried, and he just never stopped. I remember two years in, and I brought Ella home to the daycare. This time the baby fit right in. Roan wasn’t crying anymore and Jake was off to school all day, and would ask to go play down the street when he wasn’t out back in the yard with us. I’d tell him, make sure you use manners, don’t eat all the neighbors food, come home for dinner and be nice. Above all, be nice. The street back then had about four homes with kids. They rode bikes, power wheels, they swam in pools and jumped on trampolines. But at dinner time, you came home. I taught the kids how to ride bikes, spell names, learn colors and shapes. But I also set boundaries and we made rules. I still have a copy of the rules, and kids as young as two could tell you what they were. They were simple, and if broken had consequences. Rules such as: we walk inside the house, we wait our turn and we eat and drink at the table. The last rule on the page was highlighted. It was the golden rule. We treat others, as we want to be treated. We talked about this one, and shared ideas and when someone else here in my home and daycare went against this rule, life amongst the swings and slides and watercolor paints came to halt. We all needed to learn this lesson, and so we would come together and talk about what happened, why and how it should be handled. And so kids learned to problem solve real life situations. Learned to see the effects behavior had on others and learned

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KARMA SPEAKS }} {{ SHIFT+CONTROL “Amid the chaos is where we learned our best lessons. “He won’t share with me” or “she hit me” we’re daily reminders that I had to instill the personality traits for self awareness and self control.”

to fix what they had wronged. To me in the midst of all this, I felt it is just what we do. As a caretaker a parent and a human. We instill the lessons we want our children to grow up and have these innate qualities to rely on. Now, years later I am left no more with a houseful of sticky fingers touching my walls, and runny noses on the couch, or even my own pants as they disguise a hug as a chance to wipe their face. No more kids swinging out back, or a pool with waves splashing right out of the top. I have no more kids crying to stay here with me a little longer, or notes handed to me the next day. Because a child broke a rule and felt the consequences of their own actions, so they wanted express to me how sorry they

are. My kids no longer say how much they wished I didn’t run a daycare one day, and then on the other when no kids are here tell me how much they miss it and wish the weekend was over. My kids too, are mere shadows of existence. In and out like the tide. Too busy with a life wrapped around friends and games and jobs to recognize how quickly they have already grown up. How easy it is to leave the mom who once had to hold two hands at a time and push a stroller and have eyes on each side of her head to take a walk anywhere. A trip to the store not only included my kids, but most times a few others. Never left without another person to keep safe, to watch out for and to make sure when left to making divisions out and about, they made the right ones.

The best compliment was the one where old ladies would come over out of their way to compliment you on the manners of all 7 of your kids. To tell me how brave I was to wander out in public with them all and how they all reacted to society and people and the self control contained. Because every moment, every child, every situation, was a learning tool. The children are now grown. But the rules still remain. Buried in the box of old memories and photos and painted handprints with glitter. But not forgotten. Amidst the chaos is where we learned our best lessons. And now, the chaos is gone.

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{ LITTLE BLACK BUDDHA }

TAKE IMPERFECT & DECISIVE ACTION BY AHLIA KITWANA

You feel like you’re ready for a change, but are you really?

that it’s okay to take a step without feeling like it’s the perfect time.

Questions pop up like - is it the right time? Are you ready to make the change? Have you done enough preparation? Can you make a move?

Feeling nervous and uncertain are normal feelings. It means you care deeply about what you are about to endeavor. If you are entirely confident in everything you do with no butterflies or hesitation, you’re not

Within a few minutes, you easily talk yourself out of making a change because you do not feel ready. Here’s the secret to knowing when you’re ready - you never will.

Then you can rest easy in your vehicle with no worries. Then you’ll know you’re ready. This may be true, but if you wait until the cars are clear, you’ll be putting off reaching your ultimate destination. But even if you spend all that time waiting, there’s a chance a deer or another animal will run onto the road, or something might fall from an overpass just as you’re passing by. You will never be completely ready or in control. Sometimes, you just have to do it

There is no perfect time There is no perfect time to be ready for anything in life. You can spend 3 years in law school, but when you step into the courtroom for your first solo case, you likely won’t feel ready. You can complete an extensive student teaching program, but the day you walk into your own classroom for your first day of school, you likely won’t feel ready.

off the interstate. Maybe then you’d feel more comfortable. There’s no way you can have an accident if no one else is on the road.

That’s true in life as well. Instead of waiting until you’re ready, take decisive and imperfect action in your life. stretching yourself enough.

Only with action will you determine whether you are truly ready or not. And even if you’re not, do it anyways, make it happen!

You can train as an athlete for years, but when you walk out in front of the crowd to complete in your first professional event, you likely won’t feel ready.

Sink into the fact that there are no perfect times in life and make a move. What to do instead of waiting until you’re ready

Only with action will you prove that you can do what you’re determined to do.

If Beyonce can feel nervous before she goes on stage to perform, then know

Imagine waiting to merge on to the highway until all of the cars cleared

You might find the journey to be easier or more difficult than expected. Either

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{ LITTLE BLACK BUDDHA { SHIFT+CONTROL } } “There is no perfect time to be ready for anything in life.”

way, you learn by taking action, not by waiting for the right time to move. Otherwise, you could find that you’re talking yourself out of moving forward in life due to the belief you have to wait for the sign that you’re ready. 2 Things to remember on the road to taking imperfect action There are some common thoughts and ideas that come to the forefront when wondering if you’re ready to take action. However, the truth is that these thoughts can hold you back from achieving your goals. So, if you remember nothing else, keep these 2 ideas in mind as your transition from pondering to taking action. Information overload is real Sometimes in a desire to be prepared, 294

you’ll research, research, research. Take a class, read a book, go back to school, get a certification, take another class, enroll in a course, interview others who are where you want to be, read another book, you get the point. While there is nothing wrong with being informed, information without a plan of action is just information. A goal without a plan is just a dream. Instead of spending so much time learning more and more, take the time to learn AND act. Learn a little, take a step. Learn more, take another step. Learn, act, move forward, grow, repeat. Because otherwise, you can fool yourself into believing you’re closer to taking action when really, you’re

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just procrastinating, yet disguising your actions as learning. Imperfection action is better than perfect pondering Doing something new can be scary - you’re not sure what the outcome will be. It could be imperfect. But that’s okay. Imperfection action is better than perfect pondering. Take decisive & imperfect action today. If you are considering a bold career change, join us for the next cohort of Your Next Chapter. Start today in moving towards a life and career you’ve imagined for yourself.

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{ INNER LIGHT } } { SHE HUSTLES TALKS

SPIRITUAL-RE-ALITY BY BETH LYNCH

A SEPARATION OF A SPECIES Should we start by taking a deep breath…Yes take one! Many are asking what the “bleep” is going on in the world today? It comes down to, S E P A R A T I O N and communication (or lack thereof ). Take another deep breath. Begin with separation. It seems separation is all around us and when we look at history it always has been. Seems it is getting more hostile, from race to religion and of course politics. The closer to November I imagine it will get quite heated. Mountain top anyone? Not an option for most. Like many I do not know what to think, but I do know what I “feel”. I trust my feelings maybe more than most. I do know how important it is to trust those feelings because it is how our intuition works through us. Sending signals daily through us, to help guide us in all decisions, choice and challenges. The trust you build with this inner compass will give a sense of security that no other can give you. If everyone would trust their intuition there would be a lot less searching for it outside of the self and more trust and less fear would be felt. One would not need to rely on another person, system, or leader for a sense of security and balance. Its within our Spirit. Face it everyone “searches” for a sense of security and it is clearly creating a breakdown in families, communities and globally. Look around, it is on 296

the news, over and over, again we are bombarded with all the chaos. Now I am not saying we should put our head in the sand and ignore but we must start to open our perspective to a higher standard of existence as a species. Yes, big statement but clearly nothing else has worked and a Spiritual foundation needs to be considered. The mental and emotional well being of so many is compromised and this creates fear, anger and outrage. Whether we are talking about a person, career, money, religion, race or politics we are seeing separation in ideas being expressed violently. What and who does it help? No one. Sadly, there will always be bad seeds, in families, races, religion and again politics. But there are so many good and that deserve as much attention in not just media but in the mind of every one of us. We have a responsibility to our children and their future to educate them on communication, healing, and community. The connection is more important than ever. Begin with yourself! Thoughts are energy, creating emotional vibrations running through the nervous system. All of which will be expressed from personality via the body. Just for the record this is not my opinion, this is the Law of Attraction, sacred, natural and oh so powerful. Every thought you have is precious. Children learn energetic patterns that form foundation in personality. They are feeling your every perception.

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Many have lost the ability to even believe they can think in a way that can make themselves secure, strong willed, happy, and abundant. How can this happen? Through separation of our spirit, the aspect of consciousness keeping us connected to a Source that supplies us all we need, mentally, emotionally, and physically. We must as understand we are Spiritual and physical beings if balance in our species will ever take place. It is a big realization in a time where so many have lost faith. Now communication, well we definitely need some adjusting here. First and foremost, how do you communicate with yourself every day? Reflect on the energy or emotional feeling the thoughts give you. All of us have thoughts of different emotions. There will be happy, sad, angry and confusing thoughts. Being aware of how you feel in thought can shift you from active to reactive in your thinking. Which in turn downloads into your emotions, then nervous system. That is the frequency your personality expresses out. Interesting isn’t it. From a Spiritual perspective you are becoming a disciple of your thoughts. . This brings them to a higher frequency, where you now create your reality from your Spirit. The highest aspect of who you are, an intuitive, creative, compassionate, and timeless human being. Imagine all the anger and fear in the consciousness of so many healing and beautiful minds working together instead of

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{ INNER LIGHT } “Should we start by taking a deep breath…Yes take one! Many are asking what the “bleep” is going on in the world today? ”

f hurting one another. Imagine all we see being truly peace filled in protest. We must if we want to shift the energy of what is happening in our homes, communities and world. Ask yourself, how do I communicate with myself? Am I nice to myself or am I judging and criticizing? “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you” if we reverse will create a natural energy exchange. How we do unto ourselves, we will naturally 298

do unto others in the same vibration. Remember the Law of Attraction is working no matter what our thoughts are. So take a moment to slow your breath, be aware of how you feel, acknowledge and if it is unsettling or not the reality you want to live and create from, believe you can change it. We are thinking, feeling beings and we create from our perception.

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Take a breath, another, smile, pay it forward. In Peace. Beth Lynch NEXT MONTH SPIRITUALALITY & POLITICS!

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{ TAMMY’S TIDBITS }

NO RHYME OR REASON BY TAMMY VREELAND

We start the first day of September with a National ‘No Rhyme or Reason’ Day. Setting the tone for a ‘no rhyme or reason’ article. We all know what September usually brings for us… Labor Day, Back to School, 9/11, etc. Since those topics are usually tried and true with rhyme and reason, let’s delve into something else September can offer us. Let’s start off with the obvious, the beginning of Fall. Or perhaps you prefer to call it Autumn? Or even, Harvest time? Did you ever wonder why this season can be called different things? Or did you think there was ‘no rhyme or reason’? In England, the third season of the year was referred to as Harvest. For obvious reasons, a time for farmers to bring in their crops and prepare for the winter. Actually, the word Harvest comes from an Old Norse word haust which means to gather or pluck, making it appropriate for this time. But how did we go from Harvest, to the term Autumn or even Fall? In the 1600s, people began leaving rural farmlands. For these city dwellers, harvest no longer applied. Therefore, Autumn was introduced. Autumn meaning the passing of the year. A term, our fellow Europeans still use. Whereas Americans use the word Fall. Likely because of the falling of leaves. Whatever you call this time of year, what do you like to do to enjoy it? One of the easiest things to do is get in your car and look at the beautiful scenery that is just beginning to change. Sure, we can plan a breathtaking mini vacation into a popular Fall Foliage area. Or simply take a moment to glance

over at the side of the road. On the way to work or even the grocery store, for Fall is being all around us! The actual date for Fall in 2020 starts on Tuesday, September 22nd and lasting all the way until Monday, December 21st. Since we are talking about foliage, let’s touch upon the September birth flower, which is Aster. They symbolize faith, wisdom, and valor. Purple Asters can symbolize royalty and wisdom. September has quite a few other things to offer. It is National Honey Month and also the Peanut Harvest. Mums are growing and apples are becoming abundant. It is a perfect time to take a hike, go to the park, or even go camping. There doesn’t have to be a rhyme or reason to enjoy this season. Oops sorry didn’t mean to rhyme! And yet, we cannot overlook the obvious “literal” sense of the ‘no rhyme or reason’ saying. Which are ... words that cannot rhyme! Let’s look first at our non-rhyming colors such as orange, purple and silver. Don’t lie, as soon as you read them ...instantly, you are trying to rhyme something with them! Have at it - no reason not to.

other word can match us! The last non-rhyming word I have for you is ‘month’. Which brings us to our Monthly National Holidays. Let’s see what days will fit our ‘no rhyme or reason’ theme: September 4th – Lazy Mom Day – Ok, so maybe there is a reason for this one, but does there need to be one? Poor Mom needs a day just to be lazy for no rhyme or reason. Probably having more reason than any of us, to have a lazy day. Enjoy - you earned it! September 5th – Be Late For Something Day – This is a hard one for me because I am so structured. But I admit, it would be nice to have someone have to wait on me for a change and today can be my excuse! But wait! If everyone is late, won’t that make all of us on time? Hmm… best not to think too hard on that one and just chalk it up to a ‘no rhyme or reason’ thing.

Next, let’s measure in with more nonrhyming words such as ninth and pint. And for no reason, I will randomly throw in the words spirit and chimney, which are also non-rhyming words.

September 8th – National Ampersand Day – Seriously, do we really need a National Ampersand Day? Is there no rhyme or reason to this thinking? Do we need to celebrate being lazy and using an ‘&’ instead of spelling out ‘and’? However, I have to admit the ‘&’ not only is shorter but has a nicer look to it than ‘and’ spelled out, sometimes, don’t you agree? So, there you have it… you & I can celebrate National Ampersand Day - for no rhyme or reason!

But do you know, the non-rhyming word, I find the most interesting? “Woman” is this not appropriate? For are we not, ones that sometimes have ‘no rhyme or reason’ for what we do? And yet, isn’t that unpredictability one of our greatest strengths? How appropriate it is that no

September 19th – Talk Like A Pirate Day – Aye Matie, it’s true! Yet another classic example for ‘no rhyme or reason’ to why we have this as a National Holiday. Although, I suppose it gives everyone the excuse to go around mumbling ARRRGG all day while saying - Aye

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{ SHIFT+CONTROL TAMMY’S TIDBITS }} “Autumn meaning the passing of the year. A term, our fellow Europeans still use.”

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what better way than to celebrate with a night out with your girls?

fun’ no rhyme or reason you have to admit, you can deal with them the same.

And there you have it, some of our September National Holidays. In closing, I would like to add that although ‘no rhyme or reason’ can be fun, it can also have its downside.

September 22nd – National Girls’ Night – A night that never needs a ‘rhyme or reason’ or a National Holiday. Just grab your friends and go out for the night! But if you feel you need an excuse, use this day. It is a National Holiday and

The whole year of 2020 has felt like there is ‘no rhyme or reason’ to what is happening to us. The not knowing can make us frustrated, bitter, even sad and confused. And yet, if we compare our ‘fun’ no rhyme or reason to the ‘not so

Point is, sometimes there isn’t a rhyme or reason, it just is. I think the key is how we look at it, deal with it and conquer it that gives us back the control we are comfortable with making it rhyme with reason.

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{ SEEING THE SIGNS }

OCTOBER 2020 BY ANGELA MCGHEE

ARIES FOR OCTOBER 2020 This month Mars your ruling planet, turns retrograde.You will be questioning everything in your life. You will be assessing and reassessing what or who is important and who and what deserves your signature passion and energy. Not the best of months. Try not to push issues and desires as you will feel the resistance. You may lose that fiery ambition for a while but you must realise this is a process which you will have to learn from, to stand you in a better position when your verve returns. TAURUS FOR OCTOBER 2020 A month where you feel so connected to your home environment, you will not want to wander far. Chilling out or being a bit lazy becomes a wanted pastime. If you have been chasing the affairs of the heart, someone does not live up to your expectations, this is giving you second thoughts. The emphasis this month is in your romance sector; it will be improving or developing new love interests. Domestic and home life is well starred. GEMINI FOR OCTOBER 2020 Considering you are one of the vivacious socialites of the zodiac. This month will find yourself pulling back from invitations. You seem to have less need for friends and groups.The want to be alone and find your own space is paramount. Communicating from the heart is made easier and crucial in a romance or close relationship. It is a month 304

where you may find yourself in the spotlight when it comes to a much wanted career move. Surprise news from a relative is welcomed. CANCER FOR OCTOBER 2020 Mars is in retrograde from the 9th lasting until mid November. It’s not a good time for considering career changes. Your energy levels seem to take a bashing, as you feel you have put your all into projects which now seem to reach a plateau and had left you wondering what next? Those looking for love, it may be a good idea to take things in your stride and evaluate exactly what level of relationship you really want. Don’t rush into things whilst Mars is in retrograde as you may end up having regrets. LEO FOR OCTOBER 2020 You have an air of captivating magnetism about you this month and your love life is well starred. You will get noticed by the right people. if your single you will be spoilt with a choice of potential partners. Money matters flourish this month with some unexpected cash from an overdue situation. Maybe a backdated pay rise. Or someone in your past finally repays sums owed. In this period of Mars retrograde it leaves you less motivated to achieve your goals. But you will soon be back on track. You can’t keep a star down!. VIRGO FOR SEPTEMBER 2020 It’s time to look at your finances and recognise how much is being wasted

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on trivial things. Time to take stock, not only of the monetary situation but examining yourself as a person too. There seems to be a lot of time to reflect on how the world sees you. You are crying out to make positive steps towards a new you. Expression and creativity in your style and looks is a beginning. If there are problems in your love life, now is the time to heal and seek a compromise- discovering some things are well worth holding on to. LIBRA FOR OCTOBER 2020 There is a great focus on your relationship. You may come to a realization that all your time and energy that you have put into the one, that you have revered for some time. It may feel that all your efforts are not being reciprocated. Time to make that big decision and finally, walk away. Also time to examine your well being and take up some sport or recreation to help reduce your stress levels. Don’t let your emotions rule your level head. Balance and logic will prevail once more. SCORPIO FOR OCTOBER 2020 Opportunity Knocks on your door. There are rewards for your talent this month. Your efforts are being recognised by a hierarchy of VIPS. You will be surprised by who will ask you to join them on a project. Although a joint project, it will seem you are doing all the work. Your natural passion and focus will pay

{ SEEING THE SIGNS }

“ Great to connect with you once more. Here is the September 2020 Psychic Astrology.”

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{ SEEING THE SIGNS } “TAURUS for OCTOBER 2020 A month where you feel so connected to your home environment, you will not want to wander far. Chilling out or being a bit lazy becomes a wanted pastime.”

natural passion and focus will pay dividends in monetary terms.Time to treat you and your family to a bit of celebration. If you’re single, you need to let your love interest know exactly where they stand with you. Finances are looking better than they have for a while. Your left feeling Blessed. SAGITTARIUS for OCTOBER 2020 The focus is on your career this month, as you seem to be on the crest of a wave. Moving forward with a long term project that will be highlighted by the New moon on the17th. An overwhelming great sense of achievement is gained. Time to celebrate. Your love life may seem stale but making an effort to rekindle that first date attraction will work wonders. Laughter is the best remedy when you want to relax. So find time to replenish before the work stress levels start to rise. CAPRICORN for OCTOBER 2020 Financial gain is accomplished this month, maybe from a long term investment, inheritance or even from a gamble you once took. Monetary 306

terms are well starred. It seems you have the Midas touch. But not in the case of family and home. Home improvements are likely to go ahead but not without mishaps and as for family, you will need to prioritise who needs your attention the most, as demands are high. As for your love life, you may be left feeling vulnerable after opening up your feelings with someone close. AQUARIUS for OCTOBER 2020 You are feeling loved up, deservedly so. Your partner seems so in sync with your emotions. True love is in the air. Talk of wedding bells is on the horizon. If you are single, now is the right time to be looking for Mr/s right. The new moon on the 17th brings in a lucrative idea that will line your pockets for some time ahead. Take care of your homestead as repair and replacements are showing strain and well overdue. Asking for help does not sit comfortable with single minded Aquarius but help for a project turns up unexpectedly.

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PISCES for OCTOBER 2020 With Mars retrograde you seem to be going over old ground trying to sustain an income from some work venture that has had its day. It is time to rethink your goals and bring in new ideas. At the new moon on the 17th you are more emotional than your signature self. It is a time for cleansing and healing of past hurts. A chance meeting with someone new will light up your world. Don’t be afraid to take the first step. Those in a relationship may want to commit to a deeper understanding. Someone around needs your forgiveness. Love and light ANGELA McGHEE www.angelamcghee.com angelkm39@hotmail.com call +44 (0)7789 563 169 INTERNATIONAL TV PSYCHIC M E D I U M AU T H O R & ASTROLOGIST

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{ TRAVEL WITH AGNESS { SHIFT+CONTROL } }

DEALING WITH CHALLENGES BY RANDY AGNESS - WINEMAKER

I have been traveling to just about every corner of New York State – either living, working or traveling there. New York has so many different choices, but I’m here in the Saranac and Lake Placid region to provide some great reasons to tell you about why you should be visiting here. Any destination I believe it must have the essentials including stunning beauty and holy cow it doesn’t disappoint. The scenary georgous lakes, mountain peak, quaint cities, great eats and a four season get-a-way attitude. I can stay away for any period of time and I take different approaches to make the ride memorable too, yet any path will get you here. It’s approaching the fall season so a perfect time plan your exclursion. My path takes me thru Old Forge with a stop at Fulton Chain Craft Brewery as I’m a big fan of Pilsner – Lagers. These Brew Masters have in a few years more than double capacity stickly due to the superior quality and wide selection including rotating delious ten beers on tap along side their outstanding IPA Go Fluff ‘you’re bound to fall in love with at least one of them’, said simultaneously by the founder Justin and Rich. With a slogan “I live to play in the ADK” they have the funlovering additude that contragious. I had been encouraged by the welcome to the Adirondacks with “Take a chance of life and find your adventure canoe”so 308

I did. I’ll talk about that later. As you will gather the trip is as great as the destination with the next pause in Tupper Lake at Raquette River Brewing at the crossroads of the Adirondack Mountains to taste their offerings and pickup a few growlers with unique tastes as varied as the people enjoying them. “We like to experiment with local ingredients and small scale batches,” stated owner Mark

Jesse, “many local bars and restaurants sell our beers in cans / bottles and on tap across the ADK.” My favorites included the Raquette River Summer Ale and of course the Raquette River Light Lager among the eleven beer on tap. Try samples of the IPA’s, Ales and Porter before making your decision on who will be your travel partner and they are always open to new ideas from those who visit – very cool. So arriving in Saranac Lake I prefer staying at “Hot Sara” Hilton Curio Hotel Saranac. Part of the enjoyment

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is reading the vivid history of the hotel and the feeling of luxury right down to robes, rainfall shower head and fabulous views even the shopping inside the hotel will yield nice gifting ideas. Executive Chef Richard Brosseau has proceeded to further elevate the wine list and training the staff to prepare amazing food in the rustic décor of the Campfire Adirondack Grill + Bar. Hitlon spared no expense in beautifully restoring the Hotel Saranac. With several wine shops nearby there’s nice selection of Finger Lakes Rieslings to pick from for an daily exclusion such as a canoe ride on pristine waters of Saranac Lake or one of the many surrounding lakes, or maybe a hike among the 46 peaks. If you prefer mountain biking there’s an abundance to chose from. Depeding on the season, Lake Placid remains a central character in the region offering more an what could be covered in a single trip alone. Perhaps an evening of listening pleasure by the Orchestra of the the Adirondacks in the summer, skiing at the home of Winter Olympic at Whiteface Mountain’s challenging slopes, and always great fine dining venues such as the View at Mirror Lake Inn Restaurant and Cottage, the Upstairs Grill Steak & Seafood or the Hyatt Regency’s pictureques view can’t be missed as all don’t disappoint. In town, a brew or two can be enjoyed at Lake Placid Brewery and The Big Slide Pub and Public House with a full restaurant and great suds a short distance away. More time cross country skiing,

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{ SHIFT+CONTROL } } { TRAVEL WITH AGNESS “New York has so many different choices, but I’m here in the Saranac and Lake Placid region to provide some great reasons to tell you about why you should be visiting here.”

snowmobiling even ice skating on the Olympic Oval. Yes, and back to the canoe adventure magificant memories of paddling on a crystal clear lake waters and blue skies above. With significant help from Adirondack Lakes and Trails Outfitters, I was able to travel along the contours and open waters. The freedom of paddling at my own pace starting in the early morning was just the relaxation my 310

body and mind desired. I didn’t have enough time and the opportunity to pack my fishing gear this time,but did over hear the stories explained in great detail of the size and quantity of catches or enjoy a brilliant sunset dinner cruise outing. I did take the time to watch a group of sail boats effortlessly gliding about while sipping a delicious fruit smoothie looking out at the glissing sunrise. This is

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a must trip to Saranac and Placid with option of continually repeating various enjoyable endings as often as possible.

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{ WELL TRAIL } } { SHIFT+CONTROL

TAKE YOUR NEXT FIRST STEP BY KELLI LAPAGE

P R O G R E S S O N LY HAPPENS WHEN WE MOVE FORWARD Each week I am lucky enough to support dozens of individuals as they work towards their personal health, well-being and life goals. As I sit with each person and start our consultation, I am always quick to stop the individuals who immediately start the conversation with what they did wrong. Many begin with a complete confessional of everything they believe they did wrong in the previous week(s). And while recognizing how your actions, or lack thereof, affect achievement of ANY goals you have in life, focusing on the guilt, the shame, the judgement and the retribution of “making bad choices” does not get you anywhere.

know what happens? Almost every time, the person will launch into a very detailed, self-aware chronology of multiple action steps they took towards their goal, triggers they recognized, and lessons and new applications they learned. When they finish sharing all of this POSITIVE information, I ask how that makes them feel. And all of a sudden, they are smiling and proud instead of shameful and down trodden. Where we spend our energy is everything.

Yet it is human nature for many of us to lament on our perceived shortcomings and failures, and to point them out first before someone else can “catch us in the act”. This comes as a surprise to many people when I call them out. Even in the middle of their confessional they feel like they are “hiding” their perceived misgivings from the world – but all the while they are the first thing they share.

Why is it so much easier to focus on what we perceive as “bad”? Why do we spend so much energy beating up on ourselves instead of recognizing and celebrating how far we have come? Our self-worth is shaped by our upbringing, parents, teachers, coaches, religious leaders, peers – you name it. To have a conscience means that you will take to criticism to heart. But the dark side to this is that many of us become so fixated on those negative voices – most of which come from within ourselves – that it stops us in our tracks. All of the energy that it takes to live in a cycle of guilt and shame and self-judgement (and in the worst manifestations – self-loathing) are completely wasted, and could be spent on actual change and growth that would support moving forward.

When this happens, I immediately redirect the conversation. I’ll say, “we can talk about what you would like to do differently moving forward in a little bit, but first, let’s talk about what went well this week.” And do you

The thing about being stuck in that swamp of self-criticism is it feels like it will take so much effort to pull yourself out. But the truth is - it is always just one step forward onto solid footing. And once you get

moving, the momentum is on your side. When working with clients on their goals I always ask what one step can you take this week that will move you closer to that goal? Not the biggest step. Not the scariest step. Not the step your spouse or parent or son or daughter want you to make. And not even the step you think you SHOULD take. But what step are you willing, and able and confident you can make. Just for the next week. And ideally – taking that step will make you feel hopeful and excited and proud. The truth is, where we start isn’t the issue. Many of us never get started because we don’t know where to start, or we are afraid we will choose the “wrong” step ( btw – there is no wrong step, just steps that help us learn). We often get confused by all the steps others have taken and the pressure they may put on us to do it “their way”. And above all, we are afraid to take the first step because we do not want to fail. In our mind – that small step is so much more. If we stumble or fall then that is reinforcement that we are bad. None of these beliefs could be further from the truth. The secret to progress is just taking the next first step. Look at a goal you have for yourself. Have you been consistently taking steps to move forward – no matter how small you believe those steps may be? Do you spend time each day/ each week to acknowledge what you have accomplished? And do you take time to look back, not in judgement

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{ SHIFT+CONTROL { WELL TRAIL } } “Even in the middle of their confessional they feel like they are “hiding” their perceived misgivings from the world – but all the while they are the first thing they share.”

of where the stumbles or missteps happened, but to gain perspective on how far you have actually come? I challenge you to set one small step to take for the next week and at week’s end journal what you have learned and what you have accomplished. If that old familiar voice starts to chime in “ but you didn’t….” or “don’t you remember you did … (this bad thing)” you simply say to yourself, “Yes… AND look at all of 314

this that I did!” Stay focused on what you WILL do to achieve your goals, not what you haven’t yet done. Stay focused on the fact that you are capable and competent and complete just as you are – and each step will be another lesson learned and another step toward progress. Just take that next first step. Your goals are waiting.

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Kelli LaPage and WellTrail provide individual and organizational health and injury management consulting services throughout the state of NY, and surrounding regions. If you would like more information you can contact Kelli at klapage@welltrail.com

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{ TRACY IS TALKING }

YOU ARE STILL GREAT IN UNPREDICTABLE TIMES BY TRACY SIMONE

The reality is that no matter who you are, this year, you have experienced a lack of control. Even if you thought you had it all together at the beginning of the year, someone still told you at some point to stay in the house, wear a mask, maybe not work or go to school for a while, figure out how to do it online, etc. Then, we learned that the numbers were wrong and that something fishy was most likely going on. Still, we needed to keep pushing forward and seeing what might be next. Every single person on the planet has been a life disrupted. This is and has been the most fascinating year ever. Through all the fires, lawlessness, crazy politicians, chem trails, synthetic meat, vaccines, protests, blah blah blah, we must not lose sight of how fortunate we are to be alive at this particular time in history. Hopefully, we all have learned many lessons this year. This is a time for self-reflection and appreciation. The way we were living was not in alignment with nature, or how the world is supposed to function. Many institutions had to fall. Many world leaders and people we knew as icons had to be removed. We hear bits and pieces of excellent and terrible information all at the same time. Again, we need to reexamine things and make sure that we are doing the best we can to not only survive but to thrive. Always.

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Maybe some of us needed to learn to be better prepared for the future. Maybe toilet paper and pasta are not the only things we might need in an emergency. Hmmm. There is talk of a pending food shortage. Are we ready if that turns out to be true? Maybe we shouldn’t

think that our friends and family are ‘conspiracy theorists’ wearing tin foil hats when they try to tell us something. We can learn from everyone and some people stay plugged in better than others. So as we see people executing their version of correcting racism, taking over cities, injuring each other, destroying property and generally raising Hell, we need to acknowledge that there are others doing

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wonderful things like helping their friends and neighbors navigate these interesting times. As we figure out if we have 5G towers meant to harm us or Tesla towers that will provide us with free energy; or whether or not Prince, Michael Jackson, Princess Diana and JFK Jr. are really actually still alive while others who we think we are seeing on television are actually gone……we will have to wait and see. Maybe we were relying too much on the government and other citizens to tell us the truth and take care of us. Maybe, it is just our turn now to be under attack since our country had a bad habit of attacking others, imposing our will, and overthrowing their governments. Was this about a virus or an election? Was it about racism or trying to take over the country? Is it about a coin shortage or a global financial reset and revaluation along with the new block chain managed Quantum Financial System? Will there be a debt jubilee or a depression worse than the one in the 1920s? Are there really “med beds” and cures for diseases that were withheld from us? We still cannot get a straight story from the ‘fake’ news. They do not even cover the huge Save The Children marches that are taking place, even the one that broke into their offices in Los Angeles. They barely cover the peace agreements that are happening between countries that could never previously

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{ TRACY TALKS }

“It all works together for the good and in the end, we will be just fine.”

seem to get along. There are people sharing information online but that gets censored if it fails to line up with the agenda of the day. Do not forget that through it all, no matter who you are, you are beautifully and wonderfully made. You came to Earth to learn and to be the best that you can be. You have all the tools you will ever need right inside of you and no matter what else may come your 318

way, you can keep moving forward. So, whether there is an alien invasion or escalated violence after the election, YOU’VE GOT THIS. t Will there be more chem trails and GMO foods or more stories about how antifa.com goes to Joe Biden’s website and donations to Black Lives Matter go to his political party? Just remember, you’ve made it this far and you can continue to make it. Sure, it can be stressful trying to decipher all these crazy and unbelievable

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things, but it can also be enlightening, spiritual and even strength building. It all works together for the good and in the end, we will be just fine.

{ WELLNESS 360 }

STARTING A FITNESS PROGRAM BY BETH PARRY

How to be successful in starting a fitness program Starting a fitness program can be intimidating. However, it can be one of the best things you can do for your health and wellness. Beginning a program can be challenging, but sticking with an exercise program can be even more challenging. Remember those new year’s resolutions that start with good intentions, and then by mid-January, the plan has dissipated just as quickly as it started. So, what is the key to making an exercise program successful? It has to start with a change in your mindset, and then it will transition into your lifestyle. SCHEDULE THE TIME: We all have 24 hrs in a day. Why is it that some can get in exercise, and others can’t? It is easy to pack our schedules to serve everyone else but ourselves. Let me tell you. No one is going to do it for you! You have to put yourself first. Try working out first thing in the morning. It is a great way to start your day. If you are not a morning person, write yourself on the schedule. Write it in ink, so no erasing! The current recommendations for adults are to reach at least 150 minutes of moderate activity per week. This can be done by exercising 30 minutes, five times a week. Don’t have 30 minutes? Two 15-minute workouts can be just as effective. It’s time to reevaluate where you spend your time. When you make yourself a priority, everything else will fall into place! SHOW UP FOR THE WARM-UP: “I do not have the energy right now!” Sound familiar? Guess what, the more you exercise, the more energy you will have throughout your day. It’s like filling up your tank. Having a regular exercise program will give you more energy throughout the day, improve your mood, and improve your quality of sleep. All of these components will provide you with 320

the energy you need to get through your day! If you are struggling to get motivated, agree to show up just for your warm-up. Sometimes the five minutes is all you need to feel more energized.

any new habit. You need to show up for yourself every week! It can take a few months to create a new habit, so be patient with yourself. Self-compassion increases the likelihood of your success.

CHANGE YOUR WORDS: “I should exercise, but…” How often do you find yourself using the “should” word? Using the word “should” uses a lack of self-acceptance to motivate our actions. It places unnecessary guilt and pressure on yourself. Maybe you see exercise as a chore you “need” to do. Let’s use the words that motivate us rather than filling us with

Start your program today, at any fitness level: “I am too out of shape to exercise.” Remember, you are an individual with a different body type and diverse health needs. Having the expectations that one size fits all is not the best way to approach an exercise program. Exercise can benefit your body, your mindset, and your overall health. There are a variety of ways to modify exercises to meet your needs. Start slow; fitness is not a race. It takes one step to move forward at any pace. Listen to your body, and if it does not feel right, it probably isn’t. If you are just starting out, work with a specialist. This will ensure your needs are met and decrease the likelihood of injury. Wellness 360 would be a great way to start. Each program is designed and led by Physical Therapist to ensure safety at any fitness level. Remember, moving forward at any pace is still moving forward!

guilt. When talking about exercise, link your words to priorities in your life. For example, instead of saying, “I really should exercise, or I will feel terrible.” Change your words to, “I want to exercise to feel good.” Start changing your word choice to words that empower. Notice how your drive to exercise will start to shift.

Wellness 360 offers fitness programs based on your health needs. All of our programs use evidence-based exercises and are designed and led by physical therapists. Our M.O.V.E. program is designed specifically for the bariatric diagnosis to support all aspects of your lifestyle.

MAKE IT FUN: There are multiple ways to exercise. You do not have to follow the crowd. If it is something that you love to do, then you are more likely to continue. Experiment and try something new. Figure out what you love to do to make your exercise time enjoyable. Consistency is needed to form

Our online M.O.V.E. subscription program comes with a FREE lifestyle wellness consultation to make the program a success. We will support you in changing your perspective, changing your habits, and providing modifications to suit your health needs. You can get your FREE 2-week subscription at www.wellness360fitness.com.

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{ CNY INSPIRING WOMAN }

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{ {LOVE FOR WORDS } }} SHE HUSTLES TALKS TALKS

PERSONAL WRITING BY CATYRA POLLAND

Not all writers want to be published authors. Some writers keep their writing private. If you want to write, but not publish, here are a few options: 1 . Jo u r n a l i n g : Wr i t i n g y o u r thoughts, opinions, experiences, or other information by hand or electronically. You can have a private blog, a Google document, Word document, or a physical journal where you document whatever your heart desires. Keeping a journal can be therapeutic, eye-opening, and reflective. Your journal includes your personal accounts, most people keep their journals private, others share occasionally. Some writers incorporate their journal content into material that is later published. Journaling is an excellent option for writers who donâ€™t want to be published authors. 2. Poetry: an artistic writing style that includes thoughts, feelings, experiences, and observations of the writer. Writing poetry like journaling,

can be therapeutic. You can write free form or choose a specific poetry style. You can write as much or as little as you like. You are not obligated to share it with anyone.

3. Monologues: a one-person speech. This one is for the talkers. This is your chance to speak without input from anyone else. Is there a topic that resonates with you? Need to

get something off your chest? The monologue could be your solution. You can even recite the monologue when itâ€™s finished. 4. Letter: a direct or personal written or printed message addressed to a person or organization (Merriam-Webster dictionary). You can write a letter to yourself or another person. This can help you deal with emotions and release stress. The letter can be a keepsake. On the other hand, you can burn the letter, this is often done to release or overcome pain, frustration, anger, sadness, or another undesirable feeling. It often creates a sense of relief and satisfaction

helpful.

There you have it. If you want to write but not publish, try one, several or all these writing styles or techniques. Write for yourself. I hope these recommendations are

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{ LOVE OF WORDS } “Not all writers want to be published authors. Some writers keep their writing private.”

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{ MENTALLY THINKING }

NEW COUNSELING POSITION WITH BETTERHELP BY BONNIE FLOYD

I have recently accepted a new position with BetterHelp, an online counseling platform. I was surprised to find out that only 15% of applicants are accepted for this position. Although I have been licensed as a clinical psychologist for nearly two decades, I’m actually new to providing online counseling. Subscribers to BetterHelp have several options for how their counseling sessions are conducted. They can choose from live chat, messaging, phone calls, or video sessions. Sessions are typically thirty minutes in length, but they can be extended to fifty minutes if clients so desire. Clients also have flexibility regarding how frequently they prefer to schedule a counseling session. There are a variety of counseling packages from which to choose, based upon one’s financial resources. I really believe that BetterHelp makes a sincere effort to meet client’s individual needs. Online forums such as BetterHelp have seen an explosion of their services this year. Dealing with the multiple consequences of COVID-19 has significantly increased nearly everyone’s stress level. There have been significant changes for many of us, including radical changes in employment. Some individuals have lost their jobs, whereas others are transitioning to working remotely. In addition, parents are confronted with the myriad challenges of providing online instruction for their children.

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As a licensed clinical psychologist, I always inform clients that I seek it as a tremendous sign of strength to request professional assistance, as opposed to a reflection of personal inadequacy or weakness. Thankfully, there is currently less stigma associated with seeking counseling. I believe that nearly everyone, including counselors themselves, can benefit from receiving

therapy. We’re all familiar with having an annual physical. I wish that it were possible to have annual mental health check-ups be strongly recommended, in addition. In this way, difficulties such as anxiety, depression, and substance abuse could be addressed at earlier, more treatable stages. Consequently, clients would be expected to receive more favorable results.

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Participating in online counseling has several advantages for clients. It eliminates the need for traveling to meet with a counselor, as well as the need to receive a COVID-19 test, or to need to wear a mask. These represent significant advantages for most clients. Similarly, as a counselor I eliminate the time spent commuting to a job, I don’t need to have a COID-19 test, and I don’t have to wear a mask. Attempting to provide psychotherapy has proven to be especially challenging with having to wear a mask for several hours. It creates difficulties for clients to understand what I’m actually saying. Personally, wearing a mask soon becomes very uncomfortable! I quickly become overheated, which always worsens my MS symptoms. I’m also suffering from hot flashes, which doesn’t mix well with becoming overheated after a relatively brief period of time. I’m still continuing to see residents in two nursing homes, on a weekly basis. I really enjoy working with geriatric residents. Nevertheless, I admit that I have been looking for greater diversity in my clinical caseload. To date, I’ve already met with clients who are dealing with a very diverse range of issues: compulsive nail-biting, recent break-ups, job loss due to COVID-19, increased anxiety, heightened depression, marital tension, difficulties associated with remote instruction for children, eating disorders, increased alcohol consumption, strained relationships with parents, juggling work and parental responsibilities, financial

{ MENTALLY THINKING } “Online forums such as BetterHelp have seen an explosion of their services this year. Dealing with the multiple consequences of COVID-19 has significantly increased nearly everyone’s stress level.”

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{ {RWO’S MENTALLY MENTAL THINKING HEALTH} } “As a licensed clinical psychologist, I always inform clients that I seek it as a tremendous sign of strength to request professional assistance, as opposed to a reflection of personal inadequacy or weakness.”

problems, workplace conflict, anger management, looking for a long-term relationship, relocating back home after a job loss, low self-esteem, inadequate social support, poor decision-making, poor eating and/or sleeping habits, alienation from adult children, recent divorce, inadequate financial resources, post-traumatic stress disorder, compulsive shopping, and juggling work and home responsibilities. My doctoral training, previous work experiences, and personal experiences have combined to create expertise in working with such a wide range of clinical concerns. Dealing with such a wide variety of 328

clinical issues has certainly been most challenging! Thankfully, BetterHelp counselors retain a lot of control over their weekly schedules; they can choose to have their caseload remain stable, to increase it, and to decrease it if needed. Since I continue to deal with the challenges of chronic illness, this is a critically important benefit. Admittedly, there is a steep learning curve for BetterHelp counselors. There’s much to learn, in a brief period of time. It’s been a significant transition to meet for thirty-minute sessions, as opposed to meeting for full fifty minutes. Clients often have a lot to say, especially during

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their initial sessions. I’m very thankful to have recently been hired by BetterHelp. I already feel like I am using clinical skills that have remained somewhat dormant for a while. In addition, it’s been extremely gratifying to have had clients tell me that they’ve benefited from discussing their concerns with me. I’m looking forward to continuing to grow as a counselor through this new position.

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Rochester Woman Online

Published on Oct 10, 2020

Central NY Woman Online Oct/Nov Edition 2020

Check out the latest edition of Central NY Woman Online featuring meteorologist Vanessa Richards as our amazing cover woman for this edition...

Central NY Woman Online Oct/Nov Edition 2020

Published on Oct 10, 2020

Check out the latest edition of Central NY Woman Online featuring meteorologist Vanessa Richards as our amazing cover woman for this edition...

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