The Indiana Daily Student Magazine | Volume 9, Issue 4 | Spring 2015
THE BUCKET LIST ISSUE
NO. 22 FALL IN LOVE
Kissing at the Rose Well House is only the start. Our guide for the end of college.
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VOLUME 9, ISSUE 4 | TABLE OF CONTENTS | SPRING 2015
The bucket list issue
OUR MUST DO’S FOR YOUR FOUR YEARS AT IU
EDITOR’S NOTE Here they come…the final days, the closing hours. On May 9, freshmen will pass beyond first-year status, sophomores and juniors will look toward a less-hazy future, and seniors will stand as undergraduates in Memorial Stadium one last time. But forget all that depressing crap.You still have weeks to enjoy all that Bloomington has to offer before school’s out (forever). Overwhelmed? See our bucket list that’s separated by your year at IU. Ready for a more off-beat but quintessentially collegian experience? Read our feature on house shows in Btown. Desperately searching for a job post-graduation? We’ve got you covered. Whether you are a new reader or been with us since the beginning, we’ve been honored to serve you as your IU student magazine. Enjoy Spring, Hoosiers!
1. Complete INSIDE’s bucket list
17. Get Baked!
What you should be doing on campus, by the year, page 2
18. Follow your passions after graduation
2. Get Pizza X at 3 a.m. 3. See the Gutenberg Bible at the Lilly Library 4. Play Sink-the-Biz at Nick’s 6. Master the art of social media Make the Internet your best friend and advocate — at least for the job hunt, page 4.
7. Attend the Bloomington PRIDE film festival 8. Try all the restaurants on 4th street 9. Kiss in the Rose Well House
11. Nail a job interview Tips to make you an outstanding candidate for any career path, page 5
12. Sneak into a black tie event 13. Live by yourself for a while
Our starter guide to Btown’s boisterous bar scene, page 6
16. Be someone’s maid of honor
21. Learn about the sex research at the Kinsey Institute 22. Fall in love Two writers try to discover the secrets of the heart, page 12
23. Go to a sporting event besides football or men’s basketball 24. Go skydiving 25. See Rod Tuffcurls and the Bench Press perform at the Bluebird
10. Get back stage at a concert
15. Do a bar crawl
19. Try all the Long Island flavors at Kilroy’s 20. Move somewhere new for a summer
5. Get a tattoo
14. Read as many Classics as you can
How young dancers balance making art and making a living after college, page 8
26. Go to a house show An introduction to Btown’s music scene where free is the key, page 18
27. Get Ken Nunn to buy you a drink 28. Eat one of those massive pancakes at the Village Deli 29. Study abroad Get inspired to take the road less traveled with these travelogues, page 20
30. Do whatever makes you happy
KATHRYN MOODY — EDITOR-IN-CHIEF C OV E R P H O T O I L L U S T R AT I O N B Y L AC E Y H O O P E N G A R D N E R A N D B E N M I K E S E L L April 14, 2015 Vol. 9, Issue 4 www.idsnews.com/inside Inside magazine, the newest enterprise of the Office of Student Media, Indiana University at Bloomington, is published twice an academic semester: October and November, and February and April. Inside magazine operates as a self-supporting enterprise within the broader scope of the Indiana Daily Student. Inside magazine operates as a designated public forum, and reader comments and contribution are welcome. Normally, the Inside magazine editor will be responsible for final content decisions, with the IDS editor-in-chief involved in rare instances. All editorial and advertising content is subject to our policies, rates, and procedures. Readers are entitled to a single copy of this magazine. The taking of multiple copies of this publication may constitute as theft of property and is subject to prosecution.
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What would Herman do?
Here’s our list of what to do to make the most of each of your years at IU. We think the former pres would approve. BY FEYI ALUFOHAI
The snow has melted away, the sun pierces through the clouds, and flowers begin to bloom. Spring is here, and for students that means the end of another school year. For some this is the last school year ever and soon to be the start of a whole new adventure. Before heading off to begin a new life, finish off this semester with INSIDE’s year-by-year Bloomington bucket list.
SOPHOMORES
FRESHMEN You have almost four years ahead of you to enjoy IU!
the Art Museum wall. Take a selfie with Herman, Hoagy or Ernie.
Nervous freshman days are behind you. Let the party begin!
Start by exploring the best spots on campus and in town.
Shake hands with the Herman B Wells statue in the Old Crescent.
Throw a themed party with food entirely from the campus C-stores.
Join a club strictly for fun, whether that’s hosting a show at WIUX or joining an intramural team at the SRSC. This is a good time to explore your niche interests outside of class.
Pose so it looks like you’re holding the Sample Gates in the palm of your hands.
Get a group of close friends and plan a road trip. It doesn’t have to be far. Even a day aimlessly wondering around Indianapolis still counts.
Take as many tourist-y photos around town as you can. Put your legs up on
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Go to the IU culture fair to see the different cultures represented on campus. If you’re from the U.S., get to know an international student.
Be a mentor and take an awkward worried freshman under your wing. Don’t forget, you were once there.
Tell a stranger they look absolutely gorgeous. Everyone needs to hear it once in a while. Donate blood. Giving a little can help a lot. Go camping at Blackwell Horse Camp or Hoosier National Forest. Or go hiking in Brown County. Lets move those hips! Take a Zumba or Cardio Hip Hop workshop class at the SRSC.
A selfie with the Sample Gates is a quintessential bucket list item for every year. Just don’t use a selfie stick.
JUNIORS You have two years left to take it all in. No pressure. Since you’re probably done with your GenEd classes by now, use a couple credit hours for an odd class like human sexuality or beginner’s ballet. Eat vegetarian or vegan for a week. Curious about the world around us? Study abroad!
Make a free hug sign and go out on Kirkwood to hug strangers. Spend a wonderful spring night gazing at the stars at the Kirkwood Observatory. Go bowling. You will be surprised how many people have never gone bowling at the IMU.
SENIORS Go out with a bang, dude.
Confess your true feelings for someone before leaving.
Do a bar crawl once you’re 21. See our guide on page 6!
Create your own signature drink.
Re-create all those photos you took freshman year so you can feel nostalgic before you even leave.
Swim in the fountain. You’re almost a graduate. What could go wrong?
Watch the Little 500 race, if you haven’t already!
Take a weekend road trip. College friends are forever, but you won’t always have this much free time to spend with each other — take advantage of it!
Thank your favorite professor.
Where does that FYE bucket list come from? B Y TO R I FAT E R
INSIDE talked to Melanie Payne, senior director of First Year Experience (FYE), who says it’s been about five years since the office started printing the bucket list and handing it out to freshmen. “It came out of a project by a couple of our interns, who wanted to create something to promote some of the traditions at IU,” Payne says. “Something that we could engage them in starting early on at orientation and they could participate in as they want.” It’s changed probably twice from the first version, Payne says, because a listed event didn’t exist anymore. There aren’t any rewards for finishing – except
PHOTOS BY BEN MIKESELL
the fun of exploring campus – but Payne said the office is working on a way to help people share their progress and possibly get prizes for checking off every item on the bucket list. “We would love to develop an interactive app for that,” she says. “We’ve started to explore that.” They also take suggestions, Payne says. The list isn’t a marketing tool and it needs to be appropriate for all ages – nothing like “play Sink the Biz at Nick’s”. “We want to be really careful not to show favoritism,” Payne says. “We don’t change it randomly but of course we would [take suggestions]. The next time we do tweak it we would consider some of those things.”
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CHECK YOURSELF BEFORE YOU PROMOTE YOURSELF Tips for maintaining a fun but professional persona on social media BY PAIGE HUTSON
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romoting yourself online and through social media is essential to scoring a job in today’s society. It’s important to develop the right skills to catch the eye of potential employers. IU instructors and lecturers who know their stuff spilled their secrets to earn you that job. It all starts with simply having accounts. “You have to start somewhere, so you have to exist, first of all,” Carrie Ritchie, adjunct instructor of Social Media in the Newsroom, says. This is the first step to marketing yourself online. Many college students already have a Twitter and Facebook account. These are the accounts that most employers will look at when making hiring decisions.
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Ritchie also recommends being on LinkedIn to market yourself as a professional. “If you have your accounts set to private, go ahead and go into your privacy in account settings and make those public,” Ritchie says. There is no such thing as privacy on social media, Ritchie says. Employers are still able to find you as well as the things you post. When your account is private, employers might wonder what you’re attempting to hide when most likely you aren’t hiding anything. Use social media responsibly by being mindful of what you post, as potential employers could see it. You can even promote yourself for the job you want by posting links to work you’ve done related to your field.
Ritchie emphasizes developing a social media persona based on career goals and interests. Good ways to do so include posting content related to your dream job and modifying the biography section to reflect career goals. “Adjust your profile to reflect who you want to be,” Ritchie says. Social media is a great tool to search for and connect with prospective employers and others applying for the same positions. By searching a company, a related topic or hashtag, it’s easy to find other users interacting with the company’s social media accounts. “Follow other people who share content about those topics CONTINUED ON PAGE 5
INSIDE’s guide to nailing that interview B Y AV E RY WA LT S
It’s all happening. The end of the best four years of your life is coming to a close and the adult world is knocking heavily on your door. The easiest option would be to stay in bed with Netflix and pretend nothing is happening, but the kind folks over at the Career Development Center (CDC) have given us some tips on how to conquer the job world. Take a look at what Patrick Donahue, director at the CDC, has to say to heal all your woes. Where can students find resources for job postings? “We have created 25 industry career guides that have simplified the career planning and job search process for students,” says Donahue. “We
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because you’re wanting to establish yourself as an expert in that field,” Ritchie says. “You’re going to want to seek out other experts in the field. Draw their attention and see what they’re posting. See if you can share some of what they’re posting.” LinkedIn is also a great tool for reaching a company’s current employees. “You can see what their education and experiences are so you can understand what they’ve done to get where they are and get this dream job,” Ritchie says. “You can model yourselves after them and if you want you can send them an invitation to connect.” Ritchie also stresses professional social media etiquette. Profiles need a first
COMMON INTERVIEW QUESTIONS
Students who have experience that is related to the position they are seeking are going to be the first ones employers interview.”
Tell me about yourself. Why are you interested in working with our organization? What is one of your greatest strengths/weaknesses? Some questions you may not be expecting:
What’s one piece of advice you would give to students wary about entering the job market?
What is the most creative work-related project or presentation you have completed? What song best describes your personality? How would a person who doesn’t like you describe you?
“It’s simply the best job market since 2007,” says Donahue. “After holding onto their cash during the Great
“Depending on the industry, it usually takes 3 to 6 months to find employment,” he says. “A student’s major is NOT the key factor in finding a job; relevant experience is.
“The best piece of advice I can give to seniors is to visit the career services offices affiliated with the College or your respective School and set up an hour long appointment with a career advisor,” he says. “The Career Services offices have a wealth of information, programs, and job postings to help students find a career they will love. I advise students to follow the Five “P”s of Interviewing and be polite, persistent, patient, positive, and to practice through mock interviewing at the career services office.”
and last name in the given field as well as a middle initial if you have a common name. “Make sure, on Twitter particularly, that your handle is as close to your full name as possible and that it’s not something completely goofy,” Ritchie says. Keep handles professional to make sure employers don’t wonder what your real name is. It’s also important to be sensible when choosing a profile picture. “No beer cans, no illicit drugs, no goofy hand gestures,” Ritchie says. “Something of your face, people can tell its you and you’re smiling and look nice, not disheveled from a night of partying.” Header photos can also promote you as a job candidate by choosing a photo advertising your work or something job-
related, Ritchie says. If you have a personal website or portfolio, you should add a link in your bio. A website or online portfolio can give you an advantage. Journalism Lecturer Andrew Koop steers students towards Wordpress.org as a means to create an online website. “One can download open source files to create an individually hosted portfolio,” Koop says. “This gives the individual a lot of control and ownership over content and structure.” Koop’s class, Building an Online Portfolio, teaches students to create their own website from the ground up, an experience he finds to be empowering. “One of the most exciting things to me about portfolio
building is the number of choices that are available to cheaply host a website if you have the proper sense of adventure, curiosity and motivation,” Koop says. Keep your website up-todate by writing a new blog post or uploading a photo from the iOS Wordpress app. In an increasingly mobile world, marketing yourself online through social media and personal online portfolios will make yourself known to professionals and even excel above other applicants. “Social media is this great tool when used correctly, and these days, all employers are looking at it,” Ritchie says. “It can be an asset or it can be something that sets you back. Make it the reason you get a job and not the reason you don’t.”
To find more information, check out the Career Development Center’s website: (www.cdc.indiana.edu) Online job bank: http://cdc.indiana.edu/possibilities/index.html
have compiled industry specific information on where to look for jobs in a particular industry, including LinkedIn and other networking groups” What does the job market look like for 2015 graduates?
Recession, employers are hiring more employees and investing in human resources.” What is the average time before students land their first job?
IDSNEWS.COM/INSIDE • INSIDE MAGAZINE 5
C O N F E S S I O N S
The Back Door
HOW TO BAR CRAWL (AMONG OTHER THINGS) Bloomington’s bouncing bar scene is loud, proud, and sometimes a little overwhelming. On the fateful night you turn 21, you may feel like you’ve got all the time in the world to experience the nightlife. But as senior year winds down, some are scrambling to see the sights before May 9. We spoke to bar owners and bartenders at a number of popular Bloomington establishments to create a starter checklist of bar crawl must-dos before you jet off into the sunset of adulthood. A S TO L D TO K AT H RY N M O O DY A N D A V E RY W A LT S
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THE BACK DOOR — SMOOVE GARDNER, CO-OWNER What should students experience at your bar before graduation? “They should come see a drag show and come dance their asses off. And have a fabulous cocktail while they’re at it.” Signature drink? “We have several, around eight signature drinks. It depends on time of year what we’re serving. The Social Life is pretty popular. The Dark and Horny is good. Tropical Fabulous is fruity.” Tips for those on bar crawls? “Don’t order 50 complicated drinks and expect them to be ready in five seconds. Shots are usually good for bar crawls. Don’t come in and order a Mojito or Old Fashioned or something that takes forever. And tip your bartender.”
NICK’S ENGLISH HUT — TERRANCE AMOS, BARTENDER What should students experience at your bar before graduation? “Everybody’s gonna want to play Sink the Biz, a Nick’s tradition. Everybody should also definitely watch a big IU basketball game here.” Signature drink? “We got a lot of old fashioned type drinks, a lot of cocktails and martinis.” Tips for those on bar crawls? “Here’s some things: Flashing money in our face won’t get us to you any faster. Everybody thinks they are special. A bar crawl 20 people deep sometimes expects to be served right away. Respect everybody else at the bar and you will get served just fine.”
PHOTOS BY BEN MIKESELL
THE BLUEBIRD — DAVE KUBIAK, OWNER What should students experience at your bar before graduation? “Come see their favorite band. For sure.” Signature drink? “The Dirty Bird. It’s a big, blue surprise. We don’t tell what is in it.” Tips for those on bar crawls? “We try to make weekends in April pretty bar crawl friendly by keeping cover fairly low. But we don’t want whistleblowing or anything that will disturb other patrons. Don’t disturb anyone else’s time. Anything destructive toward the bar is generally not a good idea, either.”
UPSTAIRS PUB — CHLOE KESLER, BARTENDER What should students do at your bar before graduation? “Drink an AMF, pin their panties on the ceiling, dance with the dancing door guys, make a bullseye on the dartboard, and sign their name in the bathroom.” Signature drink? “The AMF.” (Also, we presume, a secret recipe.) Tips for those on bar crawls? “Tip us!”
WANT A BAR CRAWL ALTERNATIVE? TRY THE VIDEO SALOON. We talked to Mike Black, The Vid’s manager
BROTHERS BAR AND GRILL — JEREMY WATSON, MANAGER
What should students do at your bar before they graduate? “We have plenty of things to do. Play a game of Hoop Shot before you graduate—it costs 25 cents. We have seven pool tables and about seven or eight dart boards with regular steel pit darts.”
What should students experience at your bar before graduation? “Definitely come for a Thursday night and check out our patio. It’s kind of a secret. Nice, quiet, and chill.”
Signature drink? “Our guys come up with drinks all the time. Girls all seem to love Sweet Tarts by one of our bartenders, Jeremy.”
Signature drink? “We have six different ones—three on Friday and three on Saturday. Some names: The South Beach, Cherry Lemonade, and Swamp Water.”
Words for bargoers? “Don’t whistle, don’t scream, or yell. If you are doing something that interrupts someone’s experience, don’t do that. Tearing up stuff in the restroom or whatever is on the points lists for bar crawls—don’t make your bar crawlers do anything stupid. We’re more of an adult establishment. We get a lot of the people who work in bars because they don’t have to deal with the crap they deal with on a daily basis here.”
Tips for those on bar crawls? “We never complain when a bar crawl comes in. They’re a good time. We only hate it when they do graffiti.”
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BEYOND THE STAGE When art is your life, how do you make a living? BY HANNAH FLEACE
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lack scuff marks line the bottoms of the walls in the racquetball court. A dull, fluorescent light flickers and a faint odor lingers from a previous game. The small court in the School of Public Health is hardly a stage for art and expression. But in court No. 3, Ode to Joy tumbles out of an iPhone speaker. “You’re going to use your head as an initiation point,” Savannah Serban instructed from the far wall. “Then twist around.” Charlotte Twitchell spun on one foot and wound her body like a cinnamon twist, arms rotated around her body. The once white bottoms of her socks were black from floor dirt as she moved across the racquetball court. “If that’s weird, don’t do it,” Savannah said. “No, I think I kind of get what you want,” Charlotte said. “Like a meltdown.” To an untutored eye, the dancers were standing in a white-walled room leaping and Left Charlotte Twitchell is performing in Professor Iris Rosa’s choreography titled “Earthbound.” ES I D S N E W SC . COOUMR/TI N S IYD EP •H O I NTSOI D E M A G A Z I N E 9
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Charlotte Twitchell runs through her routine with her choreographer March 24 at the School of Public Health.
twisting and bending in ways that should be impossible. The translation from the song to Savannah’s choreographic vision to Charlotte’s exhibition is just the beginning of what will hopefully be a statement, an art, and a dance. Charlotte is a solo dancer in Savannah’s senior independent project, which hopes to combine technology and contemporary dance. The goal is for Charlotte to dance with her own shadow on a screen by the end of the project. “With the music?” Savannah asked. Charlotte breathed deeply and squared her hands on her hips. Then an orchestra poured out of the speaker and she leapt into dance. • • • or most college students, senior year is a checklist of items in preparation for graduation. For the seniors
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in IU’s department of contemporary dance, the stakes are higher and the competition is rigid. While art classes are cut from schools across the nation and art exhibitions are seeing a decline in attendance, seniors in the contemporary dance program wrestle with finding meaning and a future. After years of dance at the Erie Dance Conservatory in Pennsylvania and an audition that lead to the wait list at IU, Charlotte was in limbo. The letter came while she was in Economics, and her mom texted her the news. Accepted. Four years later, Charlotte is in limbo again. She is getting a Pilates certification and a massage therapy certification, two things she hopes will provide some income while she dances. She has plans until the end of July: teaching at home
and then an intensive study in Maine. The dream is in Europe. But doing what she loves while not starving are also part of the vision, and like many dancers, achieving those goals means a job on the side. “The reality is that a professional dancer does not have the income that a doctor or someone has,” said Elizabeth Shea, the department head. “Often our students have to get very creative in earning a living and we have to help them do that.” The seniors take a course called senior selection that helps determine what they’ll pursue after graduation. Most students will go on to do a combination of teaching, choreographing and performing. Others go on to physical or occupational therapy. “We even have a dancing librarian,” Shea laughed. “You’re prepared to do many, many
things with dancing.” • • • o other major runs from its history like contemporary dance. At least that’s what Shea likes to say. Her program’s history was a glitch in design. Originally IU had one dance program in the physical education part of the College of Arts and Sciences that began in 1927. Decades later, when Jacobs needed ballerinas for their operas, a second track of dance formed and the programs split in two. Today the contemporary dance department is part of the Theater, Drama, and Contemporary Dance department in the College of Arts and Sciences and is the second oldest in the nation. But what is contemporary dance? Images of gyrating hips and sweaty grinding come to mind. But it’s not so simple as
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the words with conviction. All around her desk and scattered across the walls are silhouettes bending and twisting. In their photos the dancers are frozen like paintings, suspended for a moment in art. “Whether it is popular or abstract, art is the essence of human expression,” she says, “People that are dancers – that is their artistic medium.” Charlotte always had the support of a devoted Italian family, Sunday dinners and all. Her grandfather financed piano and violin lessons and her grandmother was the encouraging keystone. Proud family and small successes make every grueling rehearsal or bleak tomorrow a triumph. “Some days I literally hate dance, but I would never leave it,” she said. “Ultimately the hate is fueled by the love. Sometimes all it takes is two seconds to remember. I get one triple turn in class and it’s all worth it.” • • • harlotte sits on the floor, legs spread, fanning a bright red face. The Charlotte’s Web shirt she is wearing is spackled with dots of sweat, and a few escapee hairs curl out of a smatter of bobbie pins. “I want to do something with a little more boom.” Savannah says. Charlotte stands, runs across the floor and throws herself into a grand jeté, a long, horizontal jump starting on one leg and landing on the other. “Yes, I like that,” Savannah clapped. Charlotte the did the routine again, a minute and a half marathon of defying gravity and finding balance. “What do you think?” Savannah asked. “I think that’s enough for the day.” “Yeah,” Charlotte said. “For today.”
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that. “Modern dance is a concert dance form like ballet; it is meant for the stage,” Shea said. “But it is also an experimental art form.” A large part of the program focuses on reinventing the traditional perception of dance. A few senior students each year spend six weeks preparing a dance for a two-hour session. One composition class last semester performed a dance in the Jordan River. Savannah’s senior project represents ingenuity. Another senior just broke her foot and is working on performing an entire solo from a chair. • • • veryday, dancers stare into magnifying mirrors and wear leotards that accentuate fat deposits and imperfections. Shortly after puberty, Charlotte’s once stick-like figure filled out. She would never be a ballerina. She’d been told to diet and try cardio, but she didn’t have the genetics. Her thighs and butt didn’t match the long and lean look ballet requires. “You want to be defined, muscular and lean so you can fit into the lines and shapes and look aesthetically pleasing,” Charlotte said. “It’s a weird balance because on one hand it is your art, but there’s also the mental health aspect. Are you crossing borders?” Body image is just a slice of the struggle. A degree in the arts isn’t always a practical or stable route. Shea said she grappled with it in college, trying to justify something she enjoyed so much. Why does dance matter? Sometimes the answer is simple, that art is a microphone to hard topics like politics, sexual abuse and war. But most often, dance plays at the heart of the human experience. “Art matters.” Shea says
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1. Given the choice of anyone in the world, whom would you want as a dinner guest? • 2. Would you like to be famous? In what way? • 3. Before making a telephone call, do you ever rehearse what you are going to say? Why? • 4. What would constitute a “perfect” day for you? • 5. When did you last sing to yourself? To someone else? • 6. If you were able to live to the age of 90 and retain either the mind or body of a 30-year-old for the last 60 years of your life, which would you want? • 7. Do you have a secret hunch about how you will die? • 8. Name three things you and your partner appear to have in common. • 9. For what in your life do you feel most grateful? • 10. If you could change anything about the way you were raised, what would it be? • 11. Take four minutes and tell your partner your life story in as much detail as possible. • 12. If you could wake up tomorrow having gained any one quality or ability, what would it be? • 13. If a crystal ball could tell you the truth about yourself, your life, the future or anything else, what would you want to know? • 14. Is there something that you’ve dreamed of doing for a long time? Why haven’t you done it? • 15. What is the greatest accomplishment of your life? • 16. What do you value most in a friendship? • 17. What is your most treasured memory? • 18. What is your most terrible memory? • 19. If you knew that in one year you would die suddenly, would you change anything about the way you are now living? Why? • 20. What does friendship mean to you? • 21. What roles do love and affection play in your life? • 22. Alternate sharing something you consider a positive characteristic of your partner. Share a total of five items. • 23. How close and warm is your family? Do you feel your childhood was happier than most other people’s? • 24. How do you feel about your relationship with your mother? • 25. Make three true “we” statements each. For instance, “We are both in this room feeling ...” • 26. Complete this sentence: “I wish I had someone with whom I could share ...” • 27. If you were going to become a close friend with your partner, please share what would be important for him or her to know. • 28. Tell your partner what you like about them; be very honest this time, saying things that you might not say to someone you’ve just met. • 29. Share with your partner an embarrassing moment in your life. • 30. When did you last cry in front of another person? By yourself? • 31. Tell your partner something that you like about them already. • 32. What, if anything, is too serious to be joked about? • 33. If you were to die this evening with no opportunity to communicate with anyone, what would you most regret not having told someone? Why haven’t you told them yet? • 34. Your house, containing everything you own, catches fire. After saving your loved ones and pets, you have time to safely make a final dash to save any one item. What would it be? Why? • 35. Of all the people in your family, whose death would you find most disturbing? Why? • 36. Share a personal problem and ask your partner’s advice on how he or she might handle it. Also, ask your partner to reflect back to you how you seem to be feeling about the problem you have chosen. • 1. Given the choice of anyone in the world, whom would you want as a dinner guest? • 2. Would you like to be famous? In what way? • 3. Before making a telephone call, do you ever rehearse what you are going to say? Why? • 4. What would constitute a “perfect” day for you? • 5. When did you last sing to yourself? To someone else? • 6. If you were able to live to the age of 90 and retain either the mind or body of a 30-year-old for the last 60 years of your life, which would you want? • 7. Do you have a secret hunch about how you will die? • 8. Name three things you and your partner appear to have in common. • 9. For what in your life do you feel most grateful? • 10. If you could change anything about the way you were raised, what would it be? •
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11. Take four minutes and tell your partner your life story in as much detail as possible. • 12. If you could wake up tomorrow having gained any one quality or ability, what would it be? • 13. If a crystal ball could tell you the truth about yourself, your life, the future or anything else, what would you want to know? • 14. Is there something that you’ve dreamed of doing for a long time? Why haven’t you done it? • 15. What is the greatest accomplishment of your life? • 16. What do you value most in a friendship? • 17. What is your most treasured memory? • 18. What is your most terrible memory? • 19. If you knew that in one year you would die suddenly, would you change anything about the way you are now living? Why? • 20. What does friendship mean to you? • 21. What roles do love and affection play in your life? • 22. Alternate sharing something you consider a positive characteristic of your partner. Share a total of five items. • 23. How close and warm is your family? Do you feel your childhood was happier than most other people’s? • 24. How do you feel about your relationship with your mother? • 25. Make three true “we” statements each. For instance, “We are both in this room feeling ...” • 26. Complete this sentence: “I wish I had someone with whom I could share ...” • 27. If you were going to become a close friend with your partner, please share what would be important for him or her to know. • 28. Tell your partner what you like about them; be very honest this time, saying things that you might not say to someone you’ve just met. • 29. Share with your partner an embarrassing moment in your life. • 30. When did you last cry in front of another person? By yourself? • 31. Tell your partner something that you like about them already. • 32. What, if anything, is too serious to be joked about? • 33. If you were to die this evening with no opportunity to communicate with anyone, what would you most regret not having told someone? Why haven’t you told them yet? • 34. Your house, containing everything you own, catches fire. After saving your loved ones and pets, you have time to safely make a final dash to save any one item. What would it be? Why? • 35. Of all the people in your family, whose death would you find most disturbing? Why? • 36. Share a personal problem and ask your partner’s advice on how he or she might handle it. Also, ask your partner to reflect back to you how you seem to be feeling about the problem you have chosen. • 1. Given the choice of anyone in the world, whom would you want as a dinner guest? • 2. Would you like to be famous? In what way? • 3. Before making a telephone call, do you ever rehearse what you are going to say? Why? • 4. What would constitute a “perfect” day for you? • 5. When did you last sing to yourself? To someone else? • 6. If you were able to live to the age of 90 Two intrepid reporters put their hearts old and retain either the mind or body of a 30-yearfor the last 60 years of your life, which would you want? • on the line for the sake of journalism. 7. Do you have a secret hunch about how you will die? • 8. three B Y E L I S A G R O S S A N D J O E W E B E R Name things you and your partner appear to have in common. • 9. For what in your life do you feel most grateful? • 10. If you could change anything about the way you were raised, what would it be? • 11. Take four minutes and tell your partner your life story in as much detail as possible. • 12. If you could wake up tomorrow having gained any one quality or ability, what would it be? • 13. If a crystal ball could tell you the truth about yourself, your life, the future or anything else, what would you want to know? • 14. Is there something that you’ve dreamed
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I’m nervous for what’s about to happen, but I’m glad that it’s finally going to be over soon.
In 1996, Dr. Arthur Aron created 36 questions that made couples in his lab fall in love. Two INSIDE writers, Elisa Gross and Joe Weber, bravely took part in the experiment. Here is their collaborative back and forth. Joe’s words are in bold, Elisa’s are unbolded. 14
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’m as ready as a guy will ever be. I decide to go with a button down shirt. AND I even shower. It may be a little rainy out to smell the love in the air, but hey, this is college. Anything could happen. As you could imagine, I decide explaining this whole experiment to my friends in the fraternity house isn’t even worth it. I’m the only journalism major in our chapter, and they usually just assume I’m off putting myself in potentially uncomfortable situations. I’m as ready as I’ll ever be. Dressed, hair done, makeup finished. I glance in the mirror one last time. “Breathe. It’s all going to be fine.” I walk
out of the room and down the hall. “Here Comes The Bride” begins. My roommates, Laura and Brianna, snicker as the wedding march continues to play and I walk into the living room of our apartment. “Today’s the day!” Brianna says. “The sun is shining. You’re going to fall in love.” Elisa and I were sitting next to each other when Kathryn asked for volunteers to participate in this love experiment. At the time, she seemed as open to it as I did. Besides, I wouldn’t have to worry about sources calling me back or a story falling through. Unless, however, Elisa decided to ditch me on Friday night.
When I mentioned this column and study to my fellow editors and writers at INSIDE, I never imaged that I would soon be recreating the experiment with my co-writer Joe and then writing about it for thousands of people to read. But I am. When I share my anxieties with my roommates, they offer up no sympathy. Only telling me, between laughs, that I’m going to come out of this having met and fallen in love with my future husband. “There’s a 1.5 to 2 percent chance that this guy is your soul mate,” Laura jokes. “Do you really want to close that door before it’s even open?” “Yes,” I think. “Yes, I do.” I’m chronically late, but compared to my usual PHOTOS BY BEN MIKESELL
This “date” or whatever you’d like to call it, started better than 99% of my usual rendezvous with the opposite sex.
tardiness record, I feel like I’m making good time on the drive over. I wasn’t necessarily trying to be fashionably late. But hey, it’s never a bad way to make an entrance. I sit at a small table by the door and wait for him to show. I’m as at ease as I can be under the circumstances. But as the minutes tick by I start to get frustrated. “Where the heck is he?” I think to myself. After waiting for about six or seven minutes, which I assure you felt twice as long, I frantically texted my roommates. “OMG GUYS HE’S NOT HERE YET. THIS WAS A MISTAKE. WHAT AM I DOING? HE’S NOT EVEN GOING TO SHOW UP.” After my roommates assure me that
everything will be fine and that he’s going to show, Joe walks in almost ten minutes late (not that I was counting). This “date” or whatever you’d like to call it, started better than 99% of my usual rendezvous with the opposite sex. Elisa was sitting at a table waiting for me when I walked into a crowded Buffalouie’s. I hoped she hadn’t been waiting too long for me, but she seemed less than frustrated and actually happy to see me, so no complaints. When I see him coming in the door a few minutes later, I’m instantly filled with anxiety and relief. I’m nervous for what’s about to happen, but I’m glad
that it’s finally going to be over soon. We get in line to order our food and make small talk. We ask each other about our weeks. I learn that he, too, is an Ernie Pyle Scholar. I’m a senior. He’s a junior. We both studied in London on the School of Journalism’s “Summer in London” program. We both are interested in public relations and magazine. The whole time he seems really at ease, and I just pray that I’m exuding that same confidence. After we sit down, Joe asks if we should wait for our food or go ahead and get started. “Let’s just get into it,” I say. “Let’s get started.” The first question is easy enough. “Given the choice of anyone in the world, whom
would you want as a dinner guest?” I chose Jon Stewart, she chose Mindy Kaling. I’d say that’s a pretty good start Even with the added pressure of preforming a love experiment, there’s something about the fact that we’re both at Buffalouie’s to ultimately write a story and please our editors that’s more relaxing than a true “date.” So far so good. I learn that he is really close to his family, as am I. We both share a love for TV. He talks about “The Wire.” I talk about “The Mindy Project.” On another question, I mention that I play guitar
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and that I’ve always wanted to play piano. She says she plays piano but always wanted to learn guitar. Straight out of your favorite romantic comedy. Maybe we’ll start a band?
There is no winning in this situation.
His most embarrassing moment is a drunken make out session with a random girl in a bar. My most embarrassing moment is a time when I confused Christopher Columbus and Marco Polo and loudly exclaimed in a Chickfil-a that Marco Polo was dumb because he thought he had landed in India when really he was in North America. I think I can speak for the general population of IU students when I say I wish my embarrassing moment was a historical mix-up instead of, well, you get it. He tells me about his worst memory, a head injury he received during his freshman year. I tell him about the moment I learned that my grandpa had died during one of my band competitions in high school. Joe shares that the last time he cried was when he found some of his great grandfather’s poems and read them to his sister. I tell him that I can’t remember the last time I cried because it has been so long. I am probably emotionally inept. Another question asks us to recall the last time we cried. Mine was pretty recent. Hers, less so. I’d like to blame my head injury for why I’m so prone to crying, but I’ve always been that way regardless of cranial damage. Maybe it’s because I’m still fighting the last hours of my Thursday night hangover, but the compliment section of the experiment is actually 16
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kind of fun. Luckily, Elisa is equally as open and positive about the whole thing as I am, and it’s easy for me to point out the traits that clearly make her a great person. I definitely dish out compliments faster than she does. In fairness, I kind of did it on purpose. But I can’t take offense. I could almost hear Elisa’s inner monologue telling her not to say the wrong thing. I’m completely conscious of the fact that if I wait too long to answer these questions, it’s
going to seem like I can’t think of anything to compliment. But if I blurt out the first things that come to mind, I will probably embarrass myself and give superficial answers. There is no winning in this situation. We also have to make three “we” statements about each other. Joe starts. “We are both here not feeling awkward,” he says. “We were both, maybe, feeling a little apprehensive about tonight?” I pose as a question. I’m relieved when he agrees, turning my question into a statement. A lot of things surprised
me about Elisa. I never would have guessed she’s a pastor’s daughter, or that she grew up in Colombia, South America and her first language was Spanish (even though she remembers none of it). I ask her if she’d ever marry an atheist, and proceeded to have a really great conversation about how beliefs and faith play into love and relationships. We should have our own talk show. It is now time for the dreaded four minutes of uninterrupted eye contact.
I’m surprised Elisa remembers what we talked about during those four minutes, because I remember her saying “I literally have no idea what we were just talking about.” She must be a true journalist at heart.
We should have our own talk show.
And then, it’s over. I admit to him that I don’t remember most of the conversation we just had during the eye contact because I was trying so hard to focus. “Now, we’re staring at each for so long before breaking eye contact and it’s not even weird,” I say. “I knew that would happen,” Joe says. I don’t really know what else to say. It’s weird for this to be over after being so nervous about it before. In a way, it’s an anti-climatic ending to a surprisingly fun and enjoyable evening. I thought there would be some overwhelming emotion or sign of where to go from here. That’s what I thought this experiment was about. I quickly realize this is not the case. After it’s over, I feel this odd sense of calm and introspectiveness. Kind of like finishing a session on a therapist’s couch. I can tell Elisa is way more nervous for this portion of the experiment than I am. I’ve already told her about a bar make out and me crying at a book of poetry. Things probably won’t get any worse. I ask if we should go somewhere else for this, feeling self-conscious about staring into someone’s eyes in the middle of Buffalouie’s, but Joe puts my fears aside saying we should stay. We decide, unlike in the experiment and the column, to talk during the four minutes
instead of staring in silence. Joe sets a timer and we start. Looking back, I kind of wish we just stared in silence. Watching Elisa get more and more uncomfortable was pretty funny. (Sorry Elisa). I’m immediately surprised that I don’t feel awkward or self-conscious once we begin, but this confidence is quickly squashed by the realization that it’s just ridiculously hard, even if it’s not awkward, to maintain uninterrupted eye contact for four minutes. I try to avoid looking away
my focusing in on one of Elisa’s eyes. After she loses focus once or twice I give her the same advice. We both look away multiple times and by the end of the four minutes have moved our faces considerably closer together to try to stay focused on each other. We talk about plans we have once our date is over, how we both want to go to a trivia night sometime. I’m shocked by how hard it is to pay attention to our conversation while maintaining eye contact.
We gather our things and leave the restaurant walking towards our cars. We talk business about our story, when we’re going to send each other our rough drafts and how we’re going to write. We come to a street corner. Joe’s car is one way. Mine the other. We hug before parting ways. The hug was the least awkward part of the night. I’d consider that a success in itself.
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SCOTT TENEFRANCIA
House shows are an integral part of the college experience in Bloomington.
Music for all Btown house shows — small, but free in every sense of the word BY MERCER SUPPIGER
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There’s a noise you can hear after dark as you walk the streets that surround campus. Listen closer, and you’ll realize this sound has a rhythm. You start to notice the muffled thumping of a drum set, an amplified voice shouting indistinct lyrics, and the low drone of a rumbling bass guitar. The noise stops abruptly, and cheers and applause erupt from inside a house. This is not the sound of a typical college party. This is the sound of a house show. Nothing says “freedom” like a house show. They are a quintessential part of college town life. But it didn’t start here. Folk, country, and blues music all have long histories of performances being held in people’s homes and back yards. House shows can trace their origins all the way back to
the Renaissance and Baroque periods, when chamber music was played exclusively at the home of a nobleman or a lord. Before the debut of recorded music, house shows were the only means for most people to experience music in their lives. This tradition continues to evolve today. Musician Alex Molica is one of the people carrying on this tradition. He and his band mate Jared Coyle decided to transform their south side home into a live music venue almost a year ago. “We wanted to have a venue to call our own, and also to be able to trade shows with other touring bands when we went out on tour,” he said, “It was a sort of ‘we’ll get you a show if you get us a show’ type of deal.” Alex and Jared’s idea grew into the borderline professional live music venue that exists
today, officially known as Crush Grove. Bands from all over the country play in Alex’s kitchen, while fans watch from the adjoining front room. The people that help Alex run Crush Grove proudly refer to it as an “upstairs venue.” The space is no larger than your average Bloomington front room, but Alex estimates that almost 100 people crammed in for a concert a few months ago; their biggest turnout yet. “[Owning a house show venue] is a great way to open your musical horizons,” Alex said. “It’s also great to see how everyone on the circuit consistently helps each other out. Why spend money on big shows when you can have more fun at a house show for practically free?” It’s customary for house show venues to suggest a small donation for the touring bands.
At Crush Grove, 100 percent of the donations are given to the traveling musicians, usually to pay for gas and beer. Not all house shows are lucky enough to book touring bands. The quality of house shows around Bloomington range from practically professional to cringingly awful. But therein lies the thrill of the college town house show. Your night of live music could turn out incredibly thrilling and memorable. Like all loud college town get-togethers, there’s also a chance that the police, usually citing noise complaints from neighbors, could interrupt the show. “They’re every Bloomington house party’s least invited guest,” said one anonymous house show-goer.“They never RSVP and they always drop by late at about 1 or 2 AM.” At Crush Grove, Alex has learned by trial and error how to throw the best house shows possible. “You want to start the night’s lineup with a local band, then put the touring bands in the middle, and finish with another local band as the headliner,” he said. This way, people start the night with something familiar, then discover new music from the out-of-town bands, and finish with another local favorite, most likely the most popular act at the show.
MERCER SUPPIGER
A donation jar sits at the Crush Grove.
Typically, Crush Grove puts out flyers advertising a concert two weeks before the night of the show. But most of the real advertising is done online. The Internet has become essential in the modern house show circuit. Facebook plays a very important role, since anyone can create an event page and invite hundreds of people. Bands coming through Bloomington as part of their tour can check Facebook groups such as the “Bloomington House Show Network” or “Lets Go! Bloomington” to connect with house concert venues and fans alike. Your average Bloomington house show will most likely feature indie, garage or punk bands. However, other genres have started to gain popularity at house shows, including metal, industrial, and hip-hop.
Acoustic shows aren’t unheard of. Neither are shows featuring folk or jazz. Crush Grove has hosted progressive rock bands, experimental bands, and even puppet shows. In addition to being a house show venue, Alex and his Crush Grove associates plan on becoming their own record label. Their first release, a tape by another band Alex was in called The Brown Bottle Flu, will be released this April. College towns like Bloomington have the advantage of having numerous young, ambitious music lovers that are driven to put on a great show for friends and newcomers alike. If you’re interested in attending a house show, check the numerous house show Facebook pages or ask your one friend that plays bass in that one band. He’ll know somebody.
Recycle your style and receive cash for your gently-used, trendy clothes. What’s more, browse our racks for the one-of-a-kind finds at an everyday value.
“Why spend money on big shows when you can have more fun at a house show for practically free?” Musician Alex Molica
1145 S. College Mall Road 812-333-4442 PlatosClosetBloomingtonIN.com @platosclosetbloomington
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The road less traveled Four students put a unique twist on the average study abroad experience When you came to IU, did you ever think that during your four years, you could find yourself on a safari in East Africa? Or in a petting zoo in the middle of Argentina? What about a cooking class in Jordan? Or a fertility festival in Japan? The answer is probably no, but it could, and has, happened. Thanks to the vast amount of overseas study programs at IU, a few adventurous students were able to check these items and more off their bucket lists. Most students select a European country or a place where they can speak the language. We talked to four IU seniors who veered off the beaten path and experienced some amazing things in return. AS TOLD TO DEVYNN BARNES
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COURTESY PHOTO
Above Molly poses with a lion at Lujan Zoo during her time studying abroad in Argentina. Left Molly after climbing a mountain in Argentina.
MOLLY ZWEIG | ARGENTINA Basics Major(s): International studies, Spanish and Portuguese, minor in marketing Year: Senior Hometown: Fort Wayne, IN Duration of study abroad period: Semester in Argentina, winter in Brazil, another term in Argentina Why did you choose Argentina? For international studies you have to pick a regional concentration, and with Spanish and Portuguese, picking South America was the logical way to combine those two. I wanted to study abroad somewhere that had a big city, that had a lot going on, and where I could take classes with other local students, and the best place for that to happen was Buenos Aires. I thought the time of my life to go to South America is when I’m young and speak the language and don’t mind not showering for several days. So it kind of fit all of those criteria for me and I have family that live there, so it was cool to kind of reconnect with them. What was the hardest thing about living abroad? Initially, the hardest thing was getting
used to living in a big city. I’m from Fort Wayne, and I go to school at IU, so I did not know how to take public transportation… all that kind of city stuff was really challenging. On a personal level, it was really hard to sometimes explain why something was bothering me and solve it in a way that was respectful to other people. For example, nothing in South America is efficient — it takes forever to do anything. As an American, that drives me crazy, but efficiency is a cultural value, and it’s not universal. For them, it’s more important to talk with the person who’s checking out your groceries than move people through the line more quickly. And that’s not a good thing or a bad thing, it’s different. What’s your favorite memory from your time in Argentina? The World Cup was really fun. Class is cancelled, the busses aren’t working, if the game’s at 1, the stores will close at 12:45… it’s nuts. Argentina made it to the final game, and I didn’t know if I wanted them to win or not, or which would be the least dangerous outcome. And Brazil is Argentina’s arch nemesis
in all things but particularly soccer, and they lost the semifinal to Germany. Everyone in Argentina was freaking out. It was this crazy game, Germany won by a ton of goals, and I remember people in the streets being like, “Brazil lost!!!” Someone lost and everyone was out and screaming! Everyone is watching it, and everyone in the country is yelling at the TV at the same time. It’s like if you’re in a residence hall here and everyone’s watching basketball. Like that, but times a whole country. Why should a trip to Argentina be on everyone’s “bucket list”? It’s a way to do something out of the ordinary without going crazy. Buenos Aires in particular really wants to be European, and it is not, and it’s very interesting to see. Additionally, it’s crazy cheap; if you want to go somewhere, and not have to spend a lot of money and see a whole bunch of things and pretend like you’re in Europe, Buenos Aires is the place to do that.
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JACKSON DOERING | JORDAN Basics Major(s): International Studies and Arabic, Spanish minor Year: Senior Hometown: Portland, OR Duration of study abroad period: Spring Semester 2014 Why did you choose Jordan? I’m an Arabic major, and the only real way I saw for me to learn Arabic the best way I could was to go abroad to the Middle East. That being said, the options for studying Arabic are very limited, so I found this program on the Council on International Education Exchange, or CIEE website, and it looked like everything that I really wanted out of a program. What’s your favorite memory from your time in Jordan? CIEE organized a couple excursions for us, and one of them involved taking a Jordanian cooking class. It was after classes right when the weekend started (weekends were Thursdays through Saturdays). We made what’s called Maqloobeh, which literally translates to “upside down.” It’s basically rice, potatoes, chicken, cashews, and nuts. You put that all in a pot and cover it, then you flip it upside down and tap on it a bunch of times to get everything to fall off the bottom of the pan.
Jackson Doering studied abroad in Jordan during the spring semester of 2014.
What was the hardest thing about living abroad?
of town. I was given a curfew, and I didn’t have a house key so I definitely had to abide by that curfew, otherwise I wouldn’t be let in the house.
I would say adapting culturally. With my program, we were required to do a homestay with a Jordanian family, and so I lived with a Catholic family in what would be one of the richer sides
[There were] a lot of cultural differences that were a bit of a shock to me. People would say, ‘Oh you’re from America? Are you with the CIA?’ We got that question all the time with the pro-
gram, because we’d say ‘Oh I’m with CIEE,’ and they misheard it and thought it was CIA. But they were always joking. Jordanians have a great sense of humor. Why should a trip to Jordan be on everyone’s “bucket list?” There are so many places within that
are just incredible. Petra, I personally think, should be one of the 7 Wonders of the World, Wadi Rum is a huge UNESCO heritage site, and there are just so many places you can see that have a lot of beauty to them that you wouldn’t think of. The people are incredible. It changes your perspective about the Middle East when you’re there.
MEAGHAN HUTCHINSON | RWANDA Basics Major(s): SPEA Management, Minors: Spanish and human resources, business certificate Year: Senior Hometown: Schaumburg, IL Duration of study abroad period: Summer of 2014 (May-June)
to poor areas here. So while the rest of the country is progressing, they’re still getting left behind. We went to this village and just hung out with [the people] for a whole day. It was very traditional-- East African dance, food, and we saw what they’re living like in the mountains.
Why did you choose Rwanda? A lot of it was logistics- if you’re a SPEA major they’ll cut your tuition in half for any program you want to do through SPEA. But also it kind of came off of catching a travel bug from going to Spain a semester prior. I knew I wanted to do another one, but I knew I had to have it kind of cheap, and I also knew I wanted to do something very outside the box. You don’t vacation in Africa really, and if there were a time when I was going to go it would probably be right now. What was the hardest thing about living abroad? While Rwanda is super stable, it’s still very evident that they had a genocide. So a lot of their propaganda is about forgiveness and resilience and ‘we are 22
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Why should a trip to Rwanda be on everyone’s “bucket list”?
Meaghan Hutchinson, bottom row third from right, studied abroad in Rwanda during the summer of 2014.
all one country’ rather than different ethnic groups. So seeing that this only happened 20 years ago, and we were alive, it’s just weird to see it on the surface. Also, while it’s very stable, it’s very clean, it’s still a third world country. You see what you’re taking for granted here.
What’s your favorite memory from your time in Rwanda? We were mostly in the city, and it’s very progressive, but one weekend we took a trip to a rustic resort area near the border of the Congo, and we went to this village that kind of got removed during the genocide. It was very similar
Rwanda, specifically, had a genocide, and lot of what they’re doing now is to pick their economy back up. There’s a lot about parliament and picking up the government, but also the private sector, so if that’s what you’re interested in, it’s like a case study for how you rebuild an economy in a broken country. They’re really focused on tourism right now. Their tourism is insane. Safaris, gorillas, genocide memorials if you’re interested in history… they really have something for every age. They’re a really good model of resilience and turning your economy around to incorporate the whole world. It’s a trip for everyone; their tourism and hospitality are amazing. COURTESY PHOTOS
KELSEY LECHNER | JAPAN Basics Major(s): East Asian languages and cultures, international studies (human rights focus), Minor: Second language studies Year: Senior Hometown: Fort Wayne, IN Duration of study abroad period: Full year (2013-2014) (Taiwan summer of 13) Why did you choose Japan? I’m a Japanese major, and I had never been abroad to Japan. I really wanted to get that experience, because you can’t really improve your language skills without direct immersion experience. I mean, I don’t feel right graduating with a degree in Japanese without ever having experienced it. You learn so much more about the language, so much about the culture, and you’re also able to talk about your own culture a little bit better. What was the hardest thing about living abroad? I think when you’re abroad for that long, it’s the culture shock. If you’re there for a short time, it may come at the beginning, and then you have to come back before you feel culture shock again. There’s always ups and downs there. I tried to adapt to Japanese culture, but no matter how hard I try, I will always be the foreigner. I will never look or be Japanese. People were just so impressed I spoke Japanese, and
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sometimes it got to an annoying point. Even if I was speaking Japanese to a person, they wouldn’t realize it, and they’d be like ‘Oh my gosh, I need to speak English.’ It’s very hard for a lot of people to register my face with Japanese. What’s your favorite memory from your time in Japan? Traveling. It’s really easy to travel, the transportation is pretty good, so I was able to go to all sorts of different parts and see all types of different local cultures. For example, up in the North where it snows a lot, there is always a yearly ice or snow festival, and they have these giant snow sculptures that people are working on forever. When I went to Hiroshima, we saw everything with the nuclear bombs and the peace museum. But something that’s a little less known is an island kind of off the countryside that served as a poison gas factory during World War II, that’s now, for some reason, infiltrated with bunnies. Why should a trip to Japan be on everyone’s “bucket list”? There’s a lot of things you would never find in America. Travel and food. They also have some very interesting “fertility festivals.” There’s a lot of interesting candy in interesting shapes that everyone is eating. In America, you wouldn’t see anything like it.
COURTESY PHOTO
Kelsey Lechner studied abroad in Japan for two semesters and spent a summer in Taiwan.
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ELISA’S REFLECTION It’s now almost a week after our experiment. The only communication we’ve had since our date are a few emails. I sent him the link to a video we talked about that night and we both thanked each other for a fun evening. At first, the only thing I could think about after our experiment was our experiment. I wondered what he was telling his friends, if he was even telling his friends. I wondered if it lined up with what I told my friends. I wondered what he would write about. I thought about our conversations, thought of ways I could have said things better or more eloquently. I quickly realized that I had thought after this experiment it would be clear and obvious how we both felt, what we were both thinking. I couldn’t have been more wrong. I got frustrated when I realized that this was like any other potential dating situation I had been in, over-analyzing everything and understanding nothing. Now, as I’m writing this, however, I don’t really care as much what Joe is thinking or writing. I mean, am I curious? Obviously. But I’ve realized that my feelings about this experience aren’t dependent on anyone else’s feelings about this experience, even Joe’s.
BEN MIKESELL
Did they fall in love? Not exactly. But their friendship totally evolved.
My feelings about this experience are that, no matter the outcome, it’s going to be weird. If something more happens between us, that in itself will be strange. And if nothing happens, that might be even stranger. Knowing that this guy will forevermore be walking around somewhere knowing the deep, intimate parts of my life after this one random evening is a really strange feeling. Am I in love? No. But I’ve realized that Aron never set out to make people fall in love. He just wanted to foster closeness. Love was an occasional side effect.
JOE’S REFLECTION More than anything, I came away from that night with the satisfaction that I had made a friend. I could tell some of the topics we covered weren’t part of Elisa’s usual friendly conversations. So in that sense, I felt lucky I had the chance to see a side of someone not every one gets to see. I stopped by a friend’s house on the way home from Buffalouie’s, and I found myself going on and on about our experiment. I wanted to ask everyone the same questions. I wanted
to get to know them as well as I had just gotten to know Elisa. I’ve always been an open, honest person, so I guess I can’t speak for everyone. But working through Aron’s experiment was an incredibly satisfying experience. It’s a challenge, yes. But once you jump the hurdle of initial awkwardness, it can be one of the most relaxing and easy-flowing conversations of your life. No, Elisa and I didn’t fall in love, but if that day ever came, at least I would know what I’m getting myself into.
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