Hat Trick Magazine May 2015

ISSN 2058-198X

Volume 4 • Issue 5 • May 2015 £3.00 GBP | $4.50 USD | €4

C A R RI E C ONTEY,

PhD

On Gro wing Your L ittle People

NEW !

JUNE ZODIAC PREDICTIONS Future of L&D

about Hat Trick (noun): 1. A sports metaphor for three achievements by a single player in a game. 2. A magic trick. We happily accept both definitions.

Hat Trick Magazine is a special project targeted at sharing spiritual and professional growth with like-minded people from around the world. We share strategies that truly will change your life, business and career (with a little help from some pro friends).

We’ve all been there: under/un/employed, in a bad situation, in transition, wondering what the options are and not knowing the skills we would need to get us there. We won’t lie to you. Coming out the other side isn’t easy, but we can show you what we learned along to way and help you get the confidence to turn that leaf over and pursue that which is your destiny. Knowledge is power.

Not everyone fancies themselves to be an entrepreneur but the truth is, even when seeking employment these days, pulling together your resume requires some sly articulation to showcase your skills, be keyword-optimised and with a strong, personable presentation to get noticed.

We feature inspirational people who have great careers, amazing businesses, tips and a host of amazing stories will inspire and amaze you. Our editors and contributors are some of the most connected in their industries and specialisms.

Hat Trick Strategies cannot accept responsibility for unsolicited coverage made by our contributors including reviews, articles, manuscripts or photographs of products, services. While every care is taken, prices, details or availability of items are subject to change and we cannot accept responsibility for omissions or errors.

We reserve the right to publish and edit letters or correspondence received via email, social media or other communication.

All advice is given in general terms or as a matter of opinion, for entertainment purposes only, and may not be exhaustive nor suitable for all situations.

Always seek specialized professional advice, specifically suited to you or your business needs.

Absolutely no part of this magazine should be taken as medical, professional or other advice - always seek the advice of a qualified practitioner.

Hat Trick Your Life! Take control of your lifestyle, your career, your dreams and your journey. We’ll share what we know and we invite you to join us.

If you or your business would like to be featured or simply would like to contribute a feature in an upcoming issue, please email us on: content@hattrickmagazine.com

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Hat Trick Strategies

Unit 4 Vista Place, Coy Pond Ingworth Road, Poole BH12 1JY, United Kingdom Registered in England and Wales Number 07819796 UK: +44 1383 279 879 US: +1 501 588 2248 clientcare@hattrickstrategies.com

Editor-In-Chief Michelle Fitz

Design & Illustration

Michelle Fitz Michael Thomas Hartley Eleni Sofroniou

Business & Tech

Andrea Sullenger Michelle Holmes Ucheki Ezurike-Bosse Nathalie de Ahna

Career & Learning Sandra Cunningham Sukh Pabial

Faith & Self Help Karen Salmansohn Mike Fisher Katie Clifton Gina Hussar

Joey & Michael Phelps

Style & Beauty

Shalanda Turner Rachael Pontillo Marina BerBeryan

Lifestyle & Wellness Charlene SanJenko Kate Spencer Ashley Jack

Food, Home & Family Tanya Jackson Cherie DeBurger

We love hearing from you‌ content@hattrickmagazine.com

From the Editor It’s Just Like Trapeze.............................................................................................8

Cover Story Carrie Contey, PhD: The Little People.............................................................10

Business & Tech Powerful Mastermind Groups to Increase Productivity.................................28 Dealing With Set Backs .....................................................................................32 Increase Your Facebook Page Likes...............................................................34

Career & Learning What to do When Crisis Strikes..........................................................................40 What’s Next for L&D?........................................................................................48

Faith & Self Help Karen Salmansohn.............................................................................................52 Four Little Words.................................................................................................56 Secret Rooms, Deep Wishes & Bieber Fever...................................................62 Lil Nipper Snapper Cartoon..............................................................................71

Style & Beauty Live Life in Style...................................................................................................72 Homeopathy: How Can Something so Diluted be so Effective?.................74 Confessions of a Hollywood Stylist...................................................................86

Lifestyle & Wellness Feel More Powerful This Spring.......................................................................106 NEW Your Zodiac Predictions For June 2015.................................................118 When Helping Becomes Harming..................................................................124 NEW What We’re Reading..............................................................................129

Food, Home & Family Rice Pudding....................................................................................................132 You’re Not Listening!........................................................................................134

From the Editor

IT’S JUST LIKE

Trapeze

It’s crazy how you can work with other people and, provided they know where they ultimately want to go, can see so clearly the path to get them from A to B. Working through your own ‘stuff’ is very hard, not least because you are so close to everything that is going on in your world.

If you’re multi-passionate or simply have numerous professional and personal interests, you’ll really struggle to pin down where it is you’re aiming to go. At first glance, this is the hard part. The sticky bit comes when you worked through the hard choices, put in the work, and are forced to wait for the fruits of your labour.

I’ve always been very forthcoming in sharing the course of my life with our readers. I don’t feel that I could attest, as many bloggers do, to be an expert in life hacking. My life is being hacked as we go along and I’m happy to share that with you.

Recently, I have felt some aspects of my life were in a holding pattern and for a person who likes to move milestones forward and with very 8

• Hat Trick Magazine • hattrickstrategies.com

little patience for things being outside my control, this has been a deep struggle.

I’ll be the first to admit that there were several points where I resolved to give up on something I had my heart set on. Not worth it. The fruits of this crop are not viable. Or were they? Perhaps they just needed more time to cultivate properly, or take root. Was I not feeding this damn thing enough? Was it something, nothing, everything that I had or had not done? Maybe I was just growing the wrong crop.

Sometimes, there is no resolution. It’s truly a matter of allowing yourself the time for seeds to grow or simply rot in the ground, for the opportunities to take root, or even for the alignment of your wishes, services, goals and dreams with that of its counterpart receiver or provider.

When I’m in the waiting place, I must admit that I feel a jumbled mess inside. Maybe you have studied your heart out but are just short of a passing mark. Maybe you’ve invested emotionally in something or someone and it’s not paying off just yet. Perhaps you’re just not clear on what is next, even though you’ve struck off numerous unhealthy, misaligned people and things from your life, and embraced difficult behaviours and taken the right actions. which, in theory, should put you on the path to success.

When you’re in this middle, waiting place, be kind to yourself. Despite the jumbled mess of feeling, you are perfect in every way. Just because things are not yet materialised in the physical sense does not mean that they are not perfect.

Just as the trapeze artist lets go of the bars and finds themselves mid-air until they see the next bar to hold onto, you must be OK with the middle space and know that the momentum of the universe is sending you something to take hold of and that it will be there at the right time.

By Michelle Fitz, Editor-In-Chief

Michelle Letter From the Editor, Michelle Fitz •

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Cover Story

The Little People

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Seriously, it’s true. If you are sitting here right now, reading this article, your life is amazingly prosperous. And you are doing phenomenally well. Take a second and revel in that fact.

This is one of my go-to reminders I’ve shared with families in distress for over 20 years. It continues to change my life and my clients’, and I’m happy to offer it to you as a daily mantra.

To say that my work with families began as a child is a bit of a stretch, but you wouldn’t be wrong. Because while many kids wish for toys or bikes or ponies, I had a different desire. I wanted a baby.

When my mother would bring out my birthday cake and say, “Make a wish, Carrie!” My wish was for a baby sibling. I was fascinated by tiny humans. And while I was the third of three kids, and my parents were done with that journey, my dream was just beginning.

When

we moved to a new town in the suburbs of New York and our beautiful neighbour, Regina, stopped by, my eyes grew wide when I saw her big belly. She was seven months pregnant. Our families became friends and two and a half months later, her newborn son arrived. They invited us over to meet him just days after his birth. Excited beyond belief, my mum and I wrapped gifts and walked down the street.

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I remember that day, 36 years ago, like it was yesterday. As we walked into Regina’s home, I could tell we were in the midst of something special. Moments later, Regina, days out from giving birth, wearing a nightgown and robe, walked down the steps holding the tiniest person I had ever seen.

My heart leapt with excitement. This was it, I was finally going to get to see a real live newborn. After a few minutes she asked if I would like to hold him. Surprised by the offer, I instantly accepted, ran to the bathroom to wash my hands and then promptly sat down on the couch. Pillows were propped around me and Regina gently placed baby Joshua in my arms. In that instant a wave of energy flowed through my body. I felt a sensation of “This is it. This is your thing.”

“As a parent, putting yourself first is a necessity not a luxury. Your little ones are plugged into you, so keeping your cup filled is top priority.”

I was hooked. I would visit Regina and her kids most afternoons, playing with her four-year-old daughter, holding Joshua, changing diapers and chatting with Regina. Soon other neighbours had babies and I became the neighbourhood mother’s helper and babysitter. I was doing my thing, living my dream, and I loved every second of it.

My childhood fuelled my passion and love for humans, and it clued me into the wisdom of growing people. I observed (and knew in Carrie Contey, PhD: The Little People •

13

my heart) that children of all ages aren’t “good” or “bad”; they’re either well-nourished and regulated, or undernourished and dysregulated. When I was unsteady, the little person was too. When the mother was tired and couldn’t connect with their child, there would be more tantrums and whining. I was able to witness hundreds of interactions between families and began to dream of how I could help life flow easier, how I could help families stay connected, and how I could support growing people.

As

I grew I pursued my passion for human development informally and formally. I left home and threw myself into academic studies. I earned a B.A. in psychology, M.Ed. degree in health education and health promotion, an M.A. in prenatal and perinatal psychology, and a Ph.D. in clinical psychology with a specialty in prenatal and perinatal psychology. (Pretty geeky, huh?)

Throughout all of my formal schooling and experiential learning, I became certain of the fact that the ways in which parents treat their people now have a huge effect on what kind of relationship they have later. I dreamed of helping parents infuse family life with tools and knowledge that increased the joy and connection now, to yield amazing relationships down the road.

To achieve more connection, understanding, and joy - there could be major shifts, or there could be small adjustments. For example, if a parent wants their relationship with their growing people to be fun and full of love, and they are having a hard time getting out of ‘parent mode’ - I encourage them to take my favourite challenge and ‘be the babysitter.’ Choose a night and act like a Carrie Contey, PhD: The Little People •

15

babysitter would (or a cool aunt or uncle)! Rent a movie, eat pizza, stay up late, build a fort, and soak it all in. These tiny tweaks in the relationship can put you on a whole new trajectory for what’s possible. And I know in the day to day of life, parents value these little tools, suggestions, and reminders along the way.

And yet, despite how much I knew in my head and wanted to share from my heart, as a 32-year-old finishing school, I wasn’t sure where to turn. I knew my place wasn’t as a midwife, or in a clinician’s office, or in a school. I moved back to Austin, TX, and I was struggling to finish my dissertation, find work, and live a life I was only grasping at. I’ll be honest - I got caught up in worry. I stopped appreciating my life and the prosperity inside it. I created challenges where they didn’t exist and I began to doubt myself.

I was at a crossroads. I wasn’t sure where to go, or what to do.

My savings was dwindling and I had no work prospects. I knew I wanted to work with families, but I didn’t know how or in what context. It all seemed possible, and it felt daunting.

When I’d meet with possible families, I would get anxious around pricing and nervous about charging too little or charging too much.

This wasn’t my realm - I was focused on humans. Then a friend suggested that I reach out to a mentor, and the price they quoted shocked me. That’s when I realized - if I’m going to ask people to invest in my wisdom, I have to know what that experience is like. I have to dive in as a client. I am not overstating this fact when I invested in my growth, others began investing in me, and everything shifted.

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“Feeling connected is a primal need that all humans have, especially developing humans. It helps us feel safe and seen.

And when we feel safe and seen we are motivated to give more of what is being appreciated. It’s an efficient use of the system. Love begets love, kindness begets kindness, appreciation begets appreciation.”

Once

I gained clarity with my mentor, I found myself dreaming again of supporting families. I began leading carefully crafted classes out of my home for families. Those were some of the sweetest times -- beautiful mothers and fathers-to-be, mamas and their newborns, parents who were ready to know themselves and their growing person more deeply … ready to intentionally connect, process, and slow down. The classes gave me an opportunity to teach what I had always known to be true - you are connected to your child, and they are connected to you. They are a big being in a tiny body. We can practice honouring them. And we can practice honouring ourselves. When we do that, anything in the relationship is possible.

Amidst all my teaching, I was learning constantly. One key lesson I gained from working intimately with families is that, to parent consciously, to parent in a way that honours yourself and the growing Carrie Contey, PhD: The Little People •

17

person, you need to re-wire patterns and beliefs that prohibit this connection. In my twenty-plus years of working with families, I know that the patterns and beliefs that inhibit conscious parenting look like this:

• Worrying about and distrusting human development.

• Expecting growing people to communicate like adults.

• Feeling like the parent always has to be in control.

• Getting worn down, then lashing out, then feeling guilty.

• Not taking care of yourself, so everything is a trigger.

• Becoming consumed with the negative.

• Not appreciating the prosperity around us.

• Losing sight of the bigger picture and point of this whole journey.

18 • Hat Trick Magazine • hattrickstrategies.com

Phew!

These are big roadblocks that take tender care and attention. I have complete and utter empathy and love for the parents who want deep connection, love, joy, and ease in family life - yet have these stumbling blocks to move past.

And to address the roadblocks, it takes more than one class with a coach or therapist. It takes more than one book. It takes intentional energy spent reflecting, learning, and experimenting with new tools that result in creating a family life that’s your very own.

“If a child is unappreciated for the positives but given lots of attention for negative ways of being, they will learn how to fuel their emotional needs with negative energy. They will continue to do whatever it takes to get energy from their caregivers. This can often result in the child exhibiting very unsavoury behaviours. Not because the child is ‘bad’ but because the child has learned that ‘I get more attention for my negative behaviour than for my positive behaviour.”

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Leading edge brain research and studies in the areas of infant and child development suggest that we have largely misunderstood how to effectively parent in ways that maximize children’s development. As a result of this misunderstanding, parents were led to believe they had to “overpower” their child to get cooperation. Additionally, parents were becoming more and more burnt out with the thousands of to-dos in family life, that they were losing sight of themselves and their people.

So I imagined how I could actually reach families, with more information and support, for longer periods of time. And that’s when I started researching online programs, and experimenting with how my work could translate virtually, and if it’d connect with families. If it would make any change.

Six years later and I am honoured tell you – my online programs do transform family life. I can support parents at a consistent rate for months at a time – and in their own world. It’s like I am able to whisper in their ear, ‘Hey, slow down, get connected, be playful,’ and help them really find a new way of thinking and being. It’s amazing what has been possible via the internet, and how I can share my love and offer useful tools and cultivate a community with people all over the world, in the comfort of their home.

I poured my heart and life’s research into three online programs: On Toddlerhood, Parenting Essentials, and Evolve. Through ongoing support, we are building a global community of engaged parents who are working together to raise healthy people and build Carrie Contey, PhD: The Little People •

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strong relationships. In the programs, parents rewire their own brains and create more mindful ways of connecting with and guiding their growing people. Family life, and life in general, grows easier and more joyful.

The goal in each of my online programs is to help parents get clear on how they want to be in relationship with their children, understand what’s going on in the child’s development, and learn strategies to make family life their very own.

Now

I dream all the time, and I remind my clients do the same – to dream of what they want, to hold it in sight, and to achieve it and more.

I see families, once fraught with anger and fear, now loving each other, empathising, and growing together. I see resentful and disconnected spouses and partners rekindle their spark.

I see parents working to understand their children, not judge them. I see 15 year olds who I knew when they were 4, feeling so self-assured, confident, and authentic in themselves – that I am re-inspired, re-committed to supporting this movement.

What you appreciate, appreciates. If you want life to be a certain way – appreciate the bits of it that already are that way. Blow by the negative. Voice your appreciation – out loud, in a journal, to yourself, with your family – and name what’s working. I promise you, you’ll start to see more of it and more will naturally come to you. Keep dreaming of your greatest family life. Dream of your most connected partnership. Dream of your most prosperous life. Dream of your most fulfilled, joyful, abundant self. I’ll be cheering you on from Austin, TX. 22 • Hat Trick Magazine • hattrickstrategies.com

I dream all the time, and I remind my clients to do the same - to dream of what they want, to hold it in sight, and to achieve it and more.

Carrie Contey PhD is a parenting coach who has been helping thousands of families across the world better connect and create a family life that is truly their own.

She has a year-long program that’s in its fifth year with hundreds of members, plus she has a vibrant blog and social media following.

Click below to view Carrie’s website at ~ www.carriecontey.com ~ or connect via facebook & twitter!

We

are grateful Carrie was there to hold our hands and give us the certainty that we know how we want to bring our daughter up and that this is the right way for us. I know that when she is older I will look back and feel so glad we took this path. Even now I feel this in the richness of the relationship we have, that pulls us through even the tough days. The tough days do still come, but they feel different with a map, a guide, a plan and an understanding of the terrain.

Deb C.

I

started learning from Carrie when my son was deep in toddler joy. Carrie has a way of seeing things in a fresh light. She made brilliant suggestions that changed the tone and pace of how we went through our days. Carrie is funny and smart and she’ll tell you the real deal straight out. She was my secret weapon and I can’t imagine getting through that time without her.

Our family is a little unique and when my son was four, he (and his friends) started asking questions that I found difficult to answer.

Carrie had a way of making me see the situation as an opportunity to celebrate who we were rather than explain what we were not.

26 • Hat Trick Magazine • hattrickstrategies.com

With her help, I started to see this stage with more softness and humour and that made a world of difference.

Jeanne C., Evolve (2012, 2013, 2014)

I was

feeling very stuck in general. I felt confused about a lot of big things. What should my role as a parent look like? How could I do parenting in a way that was different from the way I was raised, but also felt responsible and authentic to me? Through Evolve, I’ve gained more confidence (growing stronger every day) and trust in myself.

A different perspective. A hopefulness about being able to do right by my kids while also parenting in a way that feels responsible and authentic to myself.

Kathleen S., Evolve (2012, 2013, 2014)

Because

of Evolve, I have this whole new heart-crafted basket of powerful, cutting edge tools that help me to live my life as fully and richly as I always knew I could, as a person, as a parent, and as a partner. Evolve has shifted the way I experience challenges and celebrations, from struggle and expectation to joy and intention. For me, Evolve is an ongoing journey of creating a new reality by accepting and loving the very essence of my actual reality. It truly is a gift that keeps on giving!

Jill A., Evolve (2012, 2013)

Carrie Contey, PhD: The Little People •

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Business & Tech

Powerful

Mastermind Groups to Increase Productivity FIND ME ONLINE HERE

By Andrea Sullenger 28 • Hat Trick Magazine • hattrickstrategies.com

I used to think being an entrepreneur meant I had to do it all. That was then. Today I know that old way of thinking was completely off base.

Now I find ways to share and interact with other business professionals as much as I can. I learn incredible lessons and get energy boosts from these experiences that are like a triple shot of caffeine.

Do you quietly go about your business by yourself and seldom have opportunities to share with others in your own shoes? I say change all that. You can hang with other entrepreneurs and end up with great business boosting strategies. You deserve it.

Have you read ‘Think and

Grow Rich’ by Napoleon Hill? I highly recommend you grab the book and read it right away. It was written a long time ago, 1937 in fact, but is filled with wisdom that still applies today. One of the valuable pieces of expertise is about mastermind groups. Hill says, as entrepreneurs, we all benefit by working together and sharing ideas.

Get to know some business people you admire and form a mastermind

Powerful Mastermind Groups to Increase Productivity •

29

group. Decide on a time to meet and get a commitment from all the members. You can meet in person or virtually, using a conference call or internet communication like Skype. Lay out the expectations from the beginning so that everybody’s on the same page.

A successful mastermind group will have a structure.

Meetings should have a planned length and members will be expected to be prepared before attending the meetings. The ideal number of members will be decided upon ahead of time. A plan will need to be in place, which will take care of situations when members don’t attend or contribute as expected.

Once a few mastermind meetings have taken place and

expectations are followed for a few weeks, members will be in a routine and begin to identify the benefits. And the benefits can be huge. Members will send each other resources and share suggested books, videos and other materials. Invaluable lessons learned through real life business experiences will be shared and members will look forward to each upcoming meeting.

Not only will your mastermind be a measurable benefit to all members, but you will gain a reputation of being a great leader who had the foresight to put together a powerful business mastermind. Be a strong, life-changing business leader, form a mastermind.

Andrea x

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Click ch t a to W ine!

Onl

WITH MICHELLE HOLMES

Give your Business a Shot in the SEO Arm •

HOW I CAME BACK FROM

a Big Disappointing Set Back

FIND ME ONLINE HERE

By Uchechi Ezurike-Bosse 32 • Hat Trick Magazine • hattrickstrategies.com

Let

me ask you; Have you ever reached for a goal or something that meant a lot to you and felt so close to achieving it … Only to experience a huge set-back and disappointment? Yep, I’ve been there too and just recently went through this experience.

I had an opportunity to be published on Huffington Post, something I’ve always dreamt of. However, I experienced a big disappointing set-back just when I thought my dream was about to come true.

Check out my video below on how my goal to be a Huff Post writer almost slipped away, and how you can use it as an example to push through, whenever you experience a negative set-back. You will be amazed at how the situation turns around, to be much better than originally planned! After, watching the video, head on over to my debut blog on HuffPost here. If it resonates with you, I would love for you to like and share it!

Click below to watch

How I Came Back From a Big Disappointing Set-Back •

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INCREASE FACEBOOK PAGE LIKES With a Magic Action Exit Popup FIND ME ONLINE HERE

By Nathalie de Ahna 34 • Hat Trick Magazine • hattrickstrategies.com

HOW

much do you hate Facebook and their constant innovations standing between you and the gazillion blue thumbs up you’ve been wanting more than just about anything (or anyone)? So much that you are seriously considering an affair with McTwitter? So much that you’d love to send Dark Zuckerzwerg a massive load of pink glitter, or…

Actually, not that much because you’re about to watch my latest free tutorial, which will help you get more Facebook page likes than you dare dream of in your sweatiest white blue fantasies. I’m just saying – I’m feeling very trend-setty today!

Go watch the tutorial

So, are you ready to increase Facebook page likes and maybe even get people to share your page with your own branded popup? (Plus inspire your readers to sign-up for your email list through completely unique and visually übercompelling sign-up forms?)

Increase Facebook Page Likes

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So

are you ready to increase Facebook page likes and maybe even get people to share your page with your own branded pop-up? (Plus inspire your readers to signup for your email list through completely unique and visually übercompelling sign-up forms?)

Magic Action Box

Click the icon on the right to get the Magic Action Box ultimate plugin now!

If you want access to my beautiful step-by-step cheat sheet that goes with this tutorial, why not become a member of the Pimp family and get free access to Pimp’s secret archives? If that’s a yes then check out the link below and sign up today!

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Rebranding 101: It’s All About Brand Fonts •

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Career & Learning

What to do When

CRISIS! Strikes

FIND ME ONLINE HERE

By Sandra Cunningham 40 • Hat Trick Magazine • hattrickstrategies.com

One of the inevitabilities of life is that every so often, a crisis will occur. Crisis affects all of us differently. And depending on the degree of severity, dealing with it effectively, whilst meeting other important obligations, can be extremely difficult and challenging.

If you have a business to run, a mortgage to pay, or a family to bring up, there’s no question about it – you’ll feel the pressure, possibly the desire, to keep functioning, no matter how you feel inside. So how can we make it possible for ourselves to carry on, to keep functioning and stay productive, when all the time it feels like our whole world is shattering around us?

Crisis can strike in many forms: the death of someone close, the loss of a job, a partner’s infidelity, the discovery of an illness, the sudden dawning that we’ve somehow lost our way …

It might hit you out of the blue, or it might have been lurking on the horizon for some time. But, often

when it happens, the event itself delivers a sharp and sudden blow, leaving you bewildered, shaken and uncertain about how to cope.

As it all sinks in, you’re likely to experience a whole range of feelings and emotions, well before any silver lining appears.

Shock, disbelief, bewilderment, pain and sadness, accompanied by stress, anxiety and sheer exhaustion are just for starters.

There may be moments when all you want to do is, hide under the duvet and stay there. Or, maybe you’re more the keep-upa-brave-face-and-carry-on type, good at pretending that things are absolutely normal – and you’re fine!

What to do When Crisis Strikes

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Let’s face it, we Brits are not exactly famed for our emotional dexterity. And sadly, western business culture has limited patience for the weak, the vulnerable and the fragile.

Accepted. The show must go on.

And personal crises aside, there’s work to be done, life to go on living, and responsibilities to fulfil. However, keeping a lid on your emotions is not the answer. Just like closing the valve of a pressure cooker, sooner or later, it’s liable to explode – massively – causing one, big heap of a mess.

So carry on, you might. But deal with your crisis, you must.

Here are seven tips to help you keep your wheels turning after crisis hits, while allowing your healing to progress, so that you will emerge stronger and even better equipped to deal with life’s setbacks whenever they appear.

1

Allow time for feeling. Let’s be under no illusions. We’re talking about going through a stressful and traumatic event.

It’s natural and necessary to let yourself feel any pain, anger, disappointment and sadness, and to accept your feelings as

42 • Hat Trick Magazine • hattrickstrategies.com

normal. Unless you do this, you will find it difficult to leave the past behind and open up fully to life as it is now or in the future. So, it’s pointless and counter-productive to deny yourself from having this time. Even if you have children clamouring for your attention 24/7 it is important to find a way to withdraw quietly (or noisily!) for periods, give yourself private space and simply let yourself ‘feel’.

2

Don’t rush. Your natural tendency may be to knuckle down and get on with things. But in the beginning, you may find that even the most minor tasks are harder to do than usual, and your interest in work or hobbies has diminished. It may be hard to concentrate and sometimes it can feel like your brain is just not connecting with the rest of you.

This is completely normal. And it is not the time to rush into anything new or make any major decisions or commitments. If you can, try to delay things like presenting yourself for job interviews, attending important meetings, impulsively selling up your house or starting a new romance.

Your emotions are all over the place, so wait a bit until you feel stronger and more clear-headed. How long this will take is very individual, but if it carries on for a very long time, then it might be best to seek professional help.

3

Move gently. When it’s time for you to re-engage practically with your external world, you’re still likely to feel wobbly. It helps to adopt a slightly gentler pace than normal and to focus only on what needs to be done, rather than ‘being busy’ and filling your time with numerous, joy-less tasks. You can still ‘get stuff done’ – just be selective.

(By prioritising in this way, some people even find they are more productive than usual, and so they take efforts to avoid slipping What to do When Crisis Strikes

•

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back into old ways once the crisis has passed.) Work on achieving one or two goals per day – perhaps going for some easy-wins – and gradually build up from there. Do be prepared for the odd relapse here and there (that’s okay) and don’t expect to get back to motoring at 100 mph immediately.

4

Honour and celebrate the past. Many people rush into a new job or relationship without giving a second glance at the experiences and events of their past. That’s a shame, as well as a missed opportunity. No matter how much pain and discomfort you’re feeling right now, it’s almost certain that you’ll have some great memories too, that are really important to cherish and hold on to.

As you look back, try to be a ‘compassionate witness’ to your own life, minimising any inclination to judge, criticise or blame. Not only will it help you to get a clean sense of closure, you might even get some mind-shifting insights that you weren’t able to access until now. You will also have some great lessons to draw from, that will make you better equipped to face the next crisis … whenever it arrives.

It’s important not to beat yourself up about why things didn’t work out as you wanted. It’s easy to get caught up in endless thoughts about what-if, and if only at a time like this. While it’s understandable to feel some regrets, this is fruitless…

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5

Take care of your own needs. Coming to terms with a major setback can be exhausting and deflating. Make sure you channel a decent amount of your energy into activities that will nurture you, and help you to build yourself back up – physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually – so that you become ready to take on the world once more.

Plan small treats, take a short trip, perhaps even do some weeding in the garden. It’s very helpful and healing to have some light and pleasant distractions at times. And by the way, this is not selfish. If you are unwell or way out of kilter, you are no good to anybody or anything. So get plenty of sleep, exercise moderately and eat well.

Try not to over-indulge in alcohol or anything else that’s bad for you in excess. And be kind to yourself.

6

Free your mind. It’s important not to beat yourself up about why things didn’t work out as you wanted. It’s easy to get caught up in endless thoughts about “what-if“, and “if only” at a time like this. While it’s understandable to feel some regrets, this is fruitless, energy sapping, crazymaking thinking, and it only sabotages your own recovery process.

So, don’t indulge in it. Recognise that there are certain things which lie outside of your control (and the control of others) and that perhaps what’s happened is all just part of a larger pattern.

What to do When Crisis Strikes

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7

Reclaim Your Assets. Getting to grips with your situation on a number of practical fronts, is an important step towards putting you back in control of your life after having been thrown off track. For example, you can review your financial situation, get a health assessment, get up to date with your friends and close contacts, review your knowledge-skill base. You might be amazed at the amount you have going for you, despite how awful you feel.

Doing this work can be a great morale and confidence booster. And it will help you to plan forward too when you’re ready to take some definitive action.

By definition, a crisis is a sudden and major turning point. No matter how much you’d like to, you can’t go back after a crisis: you feel different to how you were before; others perceive you as different. And now the future looks different. So go easy, be kind to yourself, and trust that you will get through it.

There are opportunities awaiting you in this next phase. And you may even come out smiling.

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WHAT’S NEXT FOR

FIND ME ONLINE HERE

By Sukh Pabial 48 • Hat Trick Magazine • hattrickstrategies.com

The learning solutions landscape has changed significantly in the last 15 years.

When I first started out as an L&D Officer, we were

delivering learning through only face to face solutions. Some coaching was happening, and the odd bit of e-learning was present. In a lot of workshops we used video based resources showing “live” situations. We had Computer Based Training solutions often delivered via a CD-ROM. The internet wasn’t really a thing then for anything other than online shopping sites and news feeds. YouTube was in its real infancy.

Move forward a few years, and not a lot more new was

happening. Video content became DVD content. E-learning was really quite niche still and there was still a lot of face to face learning. Websites were catching up and suddenly you could stream video content on news sites.

Facebook became a thing. Twitter had just started.

Move forward a few years more

and suddenly there was an explosion of social networking sites both enterprise and public. Webinars were becoming more What’s Next For L&D? •

49

“Who knows what lies in store tomorrow. A lot of what happened over the last 15 years many of us couldn’t have been predicted, certainly not most of us in the L&D space” popular and blogging was becoming a strong force. WordPress was coming into its own. Not only that but people were playing and messing with formats of conferences creating events like ‘unconferences’ and ‘barcamps’ and ‘hackathons’. What nobody expected was the impact of the new web on brands and immediateness (totally a word I just made up) of customer service via these new channels.

Fast forward to today and mobile technology is in a

place no one could have conceived 15 years ago. Back then it was a simple device no more complicated than a PDA with phone and message capabilities. Look at the ubiquity of mobile use in today’s world with then and it’s the single biggest technological shift we’ve seen in consumer use of the shortest period of time. Online 50 • Hat Trick Magazine • hattrickstrategies.com

learning, wikis, online collaboration sites, digital universities, and many other forms of digital learning are abundantly available.

That’s a short space of time for a step change to have

happened in the learning landscape. There’s a lot of talk and rhetoric from many in the learning writing and consultancy sphere who make all sorts of claims about the redundancy of face to face learning, about the need for modern learning solutions, about the new skills L&Ders require in developing effective learning holistic solutions. But in truth it’s not really a wonder most of the profession hasn’t caught up.

Who knows what lies in store tomorrow. A lot of what

happened over the last 15 years many of us couldn’t have been predicted, certainly not most of us in the L&D space. Let’s cut each other some slack on this front. Sure there are modern learning solutions which are available, but this doesn’t equate to all L&Ders knowing these. The sharing of learning we have as practitioners is probably the most valued thing we can do in the L&D profession.

Be that through curation, blogging, vlogging, writing or speaking, there are a good many options for sharing our learning to raise what we all do.

What’s Next For L&D? •

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Faith & Self Help

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By Karen Salmansohn

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Mindfulness Retreat MINDFULNESS AND THE ART OF MANAGING ANGER & STRESS WITH MIKE FISHER, THE UK’S LEADING ANGER MANAGEMENT & STRESS GURU WHAT IS MINDFULNESS MEDITATION? We spend most of our waking hours in distraction and random, discursive thinking. Because we have never cultivated this ability of mind to simply be present, our ‘mindfulness muscle’ is weak, and we find we have little control over our thinking process. For thousands of years meditators from various traditions have known that by working with the simple technique of repeatedly bringing our attention back to the present moment, our ability to be fully present with our experience, both during formal meditation practice and in our everyday life, steadily increases. In recent decades extensive studies have confirmed this claim through the lens of scientific inquiry. You can read more about the scientific research on mindfulness and anger here via www.mindyouranger.com

WHAT YOU WILL LEARN • Mindfulness – medicine of the future • The Breath – a pathway to tranquillity • Letting go of attachments – Zero Duality Training • Reducing emotional obstacles one by one • Welcoming stillness into your life • Facing your fear and doing it anyway • Making space for solitude • Tuning in – a guide to different meditations • Encouraging a daily practice

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...Clearing the Red Mists

Four Little Words I hate being late. I can not even describe the amount of dysfunctional anxiety I feel when I am off schedule and late. Because of this insanity, I hurry. I hurry all the time. When my alarm clock goes off I am like a race horse straight out of the gate. I expect the people around me to hurry, as if my insanity is contagious.

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By Katie Clifton, Christian Columnist 56 • Hat Trick Magazine • hattrickstrategies.com

The

Lord has a sense of humour because He blessed me with a husband with a hakuna matata motto of life. My husband is much, much, much more laid back than I am. He isn’t in a hurry for anything. He takes his time with everything. He doesn’t fret or get his panties in a wad when things aren’t going as he planned. I am the extreme opposite.

I woke up today and noticed my husband had shared a link on my Facebook wall. It was an article from the Huffington Post. The second I read the title I instantly felt like I was being called out and the spot light was on me. I mean, he posted it on my page because he wanted to make sure I read it. I felt as though he wanted to make sure others knew I needed to read it too. The feeling I had in my gut as I began reading the article must be what a dog feels like when their owner finds something naughty they have done - I kind of wanted to tuck my tail in between my legs and hide. But, I didn’t.

I read the article. All of it. Crying. Feeling guilt and shame because my poor kids are going to need therapy or something because ‘hurry up!’ is basically my mantra. Seriously. It makes me sad reading the words of another mum realising the weight of her words and how she missed out on so much life because she was

Watching my kids act out a self written skit is much more precious and sacred than recipes, chores and social networking.

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in a hurry, and how precious the time is when you slow down with your children and learn to appreciate life through their innocent eyes. I get her. I am right there with the same regrets. Likely, we all are to varying degrees.

But as much as I now want to exterminate the words, ‘hurry up’ from my vocabulary, I have four little words I use even more often and I feel these words might be even more damaging:

Hang on a minute!

Sometimes I add please before it or after, just to make it sound nicer when I feel interrupted. I say it when they interrupt me when I am on Facebook. Or looking for a recipe on Pinterest. Or writing someone back who asked me a question. After all, that semi-stranger who asked the question deserves a response, while the children God gave me can learn to hang on a minute. Right?

Wrong. So very wrong. I am not talking about my kids interrupting an adult conversation or anything to that degree. By golly, I want to raise respectful kids who have a social awareness of when to speak and when to wait. I am speaking of the things that absolutely do not matter. I make them ‘hang on a minute’ when I am busy with dishes, laundry or even when watching the flipping TV. I tell them I am busy and what I am teaching them is much stronger even than my words.

People, we spend time doing what we value. Writing isn’t more valuable than a fierce game of UNO. Watching my kids act out a self written skit is much more precious and 58 • Hat Trick Magazine • hattrickstrategies.com

sacred than recipes, chores and social networking. They ask me to watch them play video games or sit down and watch a movie.

My kids just want me near; near and focused on them and my time with them. How precious are these people God has given us. I say ‘Hurry up and hang on a minute’. Um, yeah oxymoron … hurry up and wait. Wait on me. Operate at my speed, my time and by my plans and my conditions. My, my, my…

How are the weight of our words falling onto our kids? Are we crushing them and pushing them to go too fast or sticking them aside because we are ‘busy’ with frivolous, meaningless, mundane, insignificant activities that clutter our schedules and calendars?

Shame on us. Shame on me. We are raising children in a world that wants to devour them. Video games, TV, internet, friends and Satan­–(don’t be tricked friends, he is after our babies)–they all pull at our kids’ attention and all our kids truly want is our attention.

While we are busying ourselves our kids are sitting on the sidelines of our lives begging to be noticed. Wanting to be put into the game. Begging to be listened to. Aching to be watched. Desiring to be heard. Hoping to be spent time with. Yearning to feel important.

Striving to compete with our distractions.

What

did Jesus do when someone wanted to see Him? He sat down with them. He called them out of sycamore trees and watched them be lowered from ceilings. He felt them touch His cloak and He slowed down to speak, touch, listen and acknowledge them. Jesus wasn’t too busy then and He isn’t too busy now. So, why am I?

Four little words. Two little words.

Our actions. Our tone. Our expressions.

Our kids are watching, listening and absorbing what we show them.

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Listen

Pause

Be Still

Stop Laugh

Watch

Slow Down

k l a T

Take Time

r a e H

Play

Hug

Kiss

d n e t e r P

Pray (for them and with them)

Time is precious. These moments with our husbands and children are priceless. Today I have been reminded that this life is fragile and delicate and all too quickly what we thought we could put off for tomorrow or later, may be a final memory or precious moment today. I want to slow down. I want to soak up every opportunity with my family. I want to find a balance because my scales have been so skewed. Lord, forgive me.

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Father

give us the strength to be everything we are called to be. Give us ears to hear and eyes to see the people around us, as you see them. Show us our misguided priorities and convict us and pierce our hearts for all the ways we get it wrong. Lord, let us not live drowning in a pool of regret but as we hand you our convictions and sins- take them from us and let us not try to take them back from you. Thank you for your mercy and grace and forgiveness.

Sweet Jesus thank you for never being too busy, or distracted or preoccupied to reach down and love me (us). Let your Spirit fill us up so that we can love and lead our little ones and our spouses with a love that comes only from you. We need you Jesus.

Every minute. Every hour. Our children need you. Our spouses need you.

Thank you for hearing my cries for help and holding me together when I feel like coming unglued. Thank you for comforting those who mourn. Thank you for having it all under control and held tightly in your hands.

Amen x Four Little Words •

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Secret Rooms, Deep Wishes & Bieber Fever

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By Gina Hussar 62 • Hat Trick Magazine • hattrickstrategies.com

Picture a map. At one end of the map is a beautiful land. Lush gardens, turquoise water, hot men, loads of money. It’s a land called Happiness. That X on the map that tells you where you currently are? How far is it from Happiness?

Maybe you used to live there but left for a while. Now you’re homesick. Or maybe you’ve never been there at all and are finally ready to make the journey.

I want to share with you a shortcut. It’s easy. You don’t even need to sit on a mat, or chant anything or breathe deeply. All you have to do is remember what makes you tick. That’s it. What would you want if you knew you wouldn’t be judged for wanting it?

What happens to most of us is that the current of adulthood sweeps us away and we allow ourselves to be carried further and further away from what we really want. Pretty soon, it’s so far in the distance we can barely make out the skyline. We lose sight of the shore. So we give up, thinking we are too far gone now. Too late. Too old.

Too shackled to our current life. But this is so easy. It’s all about getting self-hearted.

What makes you tick? What lights you up?

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Transforming your personal life, your marriage, your business and anything else requires that you get honest about what you truly like, need, prefer and geek out on!

There are two levels to this. Soul deep (think of it as a 7 layer cake.

Or a 7 layer gluten free avocado cheese dip. I know some of you do a better job at clean eating than I do!) The Soul Deep layer speaks to things that together, weave the tapestry of your being.

These soul deep desires might include things like feeling heard, understood and validated; self-love, shared love, deep connections, spiritual goodness, optimal health, the smiles of your children, the unconditional love of your dog, compassion, inspiration, living your purpose, emotional safety, acceptance, the knowledge that someone else is celebrating because you exist, the knowledge that someone breathes easier because you exist.

Closet Bieber fever people, this is your moment.

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What do you really want at this level? What do you need? What do you, as of this day, refuse to live without?

The other layer of self-heartedness is thinner; surface-like but equally valuable and equally necessary. These are the everyday things that make you you. Pride aside. Closet Bieber fever people, this is your moment. I had a day not too long ago that made me realise how many things I enjoyed as a single girl that had not been invited into my life as a married mother of three.

My mum invited me to her house to go through my old college things. I spent all day on a trip down memory lane; back to a time when my days were filled with creativity, art, dance and theatre classes; when my nights were filled with camp fires and wine and my weekends were brimming over with passion, adventure and last minute trips to NYC.

It hit me. Hard.

I loved the life I was creating.

But it was missing some things.

I hadn’t picked up a paintbrush or taken a dance class in 15 years.

If my life was great now, wouldn’t it be even better if I welcomed back the muse; uncovered that young, vibrant, sexy artist who had been buried deep by obligation and adulthood?

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Are you going through your adult life without vital parts of your soul’s recipe? Are there layers of your love and light that you’ve left behind. And why?

A lot of the self-help stuff that’s out there now focuses on big, deep, esoteric stuff like expanding your spirituality, living on a higher level of consciousness and blah, blah, blah. That’s all well and good, but there are a lot of ingredients to a happiness recipe. If a hot bath would make you feel luxurious and restored, why do you rush through lukewarm showers? Happiness is nothing more than choosing and doing what feels good. On every level.

So what makes you feel good? Forget about fear.

Forget about what you’ve been told is ‘possible’.

What feels good?

Here are just a few ‘surface’ things that I am committed to enjoying because they are vital ingredients and without them, my recipe just doesn’t taste the same: good wine, reality TV, Italian food, plays, beaches, breakfast or dinner night with the kids, my snuggie, a bonfire with my neighbours, a good book, the September issue of Vogue, 90’s music, a collection of body lotions that I don’t actually need, the sound of the coffee brewing before I get downstairs, taking about 20 minutes each morning to myself. 10 for quiet prep. 10 for useless internet surfing.

Those are my guilty pleasures. And they are as much a part of me as my need to be heard and to feel validated 66 • Hat Trick Magazine • hattrickstrategies.com

by husband. And I find ways to fold them into my business, because no one can compete with what makes me me.

It all matters.

The key to finding your way is having the courage to know yourself You see we all have a secret room in our soul. And in that room lives all of the desires, the passions, the ‘what ifs’ and the ‘if onlys’. In that room lives all of our wishes and our daydreams, our fervent prayers and our blush-worthy fantasies.

But you can’t expect life or your partner or your circumstances to meet your wants and expectations if they are hidden behind the iron door of your secret room. You can’t expect anyone to love you fully if you’re only showing a percentage. You can’t expect life to expand if you keep a portion of your truth locked and muted.

Know yourself. Open the door to the secret room. Every truth unspoken is a life unlived.

And miracles require warrior courage. Miracles ask you to honour your soul’s wishes, both the deep and the ordinary. Miracles are waiting for your invitation.

Secret Rooms, Deep Wishes & Bieber Fever

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The work Listing everything you want in the main sections of life both on the soul-deep level and the surface level can get overwhelming so I’ve broken it down for you. Answer the questions below to start getting a clear picture of what you want, what you need, what you’ll fight for and what you just plain dig! Be real. No one sees it but you. The quality of your miracle is in direct proportion to the level of your honesty.

1) My guilty pleasures are…

2) I am a little embarrassed about how much I love…

3) I used to love… but it’s been a while since I did it.

4) If I had all the time in the world and was only allowed to pamper myself, I would…

5) In my dream reality my love life is… and my partner makes me feel…

6) In a perfect job I would… and would feel…

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7) The perfect relationship would be with someone who understood that I’m…, accepted that I’m… and shared my vision of…

8) If I could change one thing about feelings towards myself, I would change my belief that I… 9) If I knew I couldn’t fail I would…

10) If I knew no one would judge I would…

11) If I wasn’t so scared I would…

12) People would be surprised to know that I am…, that I love… and that I actually want to…

Remember, you can’t expect full magic by living half way. Happiness equals feeling good. And feeling good comes about by everything from deep and meaningful love to comfort food and furry socks. It all matters. If it makes you feel good, it matters.

Secret Rooms, Deep Wishes & Bieber Fever

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By Joey Phelps & Michael Phelps Lil Nipper Snappers Cartoon •

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Style & Beauty

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By Shalanda Turner

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LEATHER BIKER JACKET / MANGO

MANGO

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DRESS FLEKY /

PRINTED DRESS / MANGO

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VINYLUX – MODERN FOLKLORE COLLECTION

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MADDEN ‘SASHI’ FRINGE SANDAL CHEVRON CUFF

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CND STEVE

NORDSTROM

HOMEOPATHIC REMEDIES

How Can Something So Diluted be So Effective?

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By Rachael Pontillo 74 • Hat Trick Magazine • hattrickstrategies.com

One of the best parts of the work I do is that I sometimes get inside access to cool places and have the opportunity to interview extremely knowledgeable people.

One of those opportunities recently came my way–and I have to say it’s been my favourite thus far. I got to take a tour of the homeopathy world leader, Boiron’s lab in Newtown Square, PA– and I got to interview and learn from the company’s Director of Education and Pharmacy Development, pharmacist, Christophe Merville.

Christophe Merville and I It was kind of like being inside an episode of ‘How It’s Made’ … or if you want to kick it back old school, inside one of Mr. Roger’s film strips that taught kids how different things like dolls and crayons are made. Remember those? Anyway, I digress.

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As you can imagine, I had a ton of questions for Christophe! I am familiar with homeopathy in that my family and I have used homeopathic remedies with experienced good results. I also wrote a comprehensive overview about homeopathy four years ago, which you can read right here.

HOW HOMEOPATHIC REMEDIES DIFFER FROM OTHER HOLISTIC REMEDIES I was very curious about why homeopathy is regulated by the FDA while other plant-based remedies are not. One of the differentiating factors between homeopathy and herbalism is the level of control, regulation, and protocol in the lab versus in someone’s kitchen or apothecary. Homeopathic remedies are regulated by the FDA, unlike herbal remedies or supplements.

Therefore, as much care has to go into every part of the homeopathic process (from the sourcing of the plant to the extraction of the therapeutic properties, to the dilution, to the actual manufacturing, storage, and distribution of the remedies) as a pharmaceutical drug company would have to adhere to in order to obtain FDA-approval.

Christophe explained that “Homeopathic medicines were included in the Drug, Food and Cosmetic Act of 1938 thanks to Dr. Royal Copeland, a Senator from Illinois, who was instrumental in making sure that the Homeopathic Pharmacopeia 76 • Hat Trick Magazine • hattrickstrategies.com

Being regulated as drugs as opposed to being regulated as a food … distinguishes homeopathic medicines from vitamins, minerals, herbs, amino acids and enzymes. of the United States (active since the end of the 19th century) was defined as the compendium for homeopathic medicines.

The HPUS is the equivalent of the US Pharmacopoeia, which describes how medicines must be made, controlled, labelled, and more importantly defines which medicines are intended to treat what symptom or disorder. There was no such equivalent for herbs and supplements at that time, so herbal and other plant-based remedies couldn’t be defined precisely, which is why they weren’t included in that act.”

Boiron’s Deborah Kelly further explained to me that “Homeopathic medicines are not FDA-approved as drugs in the same way pharmaceutical drugs are regulated, because they are not required to go through the New Drug Approval Process. However, the Federal Food, Drug and Cosmetic Act of 1938 states that any medicine referenced in the Homeopathic Pharmacopoeia of the United States (HPUS) is a drug; therefore, homeopathic medicines are regulated as drugs by the FDA. Boiron’s medicines are manufactured and labelled according to FDA regulations because they comply with U.S. Food and Drug Administration regulations, the Homeopathic Pharmacopoeia of the United States, and drug Good Manufacturing Practices.” You can read more about those standards here.

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Being regulated as drugs as opposed to being regulated as a food under the Dietary Supplement Health & Education Act (DSHEA) distinguishes homeopathic medicines from vitamins, minerals, herbs, amino acids and enzymes. Substances regulated as drugs must be labelled clearly for specific indications. A product may also be accepted by the FDA as homeopathic if it is shown to be homeopathic under the principles of homeopathy.

MY NEXT QUESTIONS WERE ABOUT THE DILUTION PROCESS OF HOMEOPATHIC REMEDIES I wanted to know how it’s done, why it’s done (although I understood that a bit from writing the previous article), and what determines what dilution is most effective for which remedies. I also had questions about how homeopathy compares to herbal, flower, and gemstone essences, since I make those myself and understand how and why they work. The process seemed very similar to me.

My dilution education began in the lab–well, actually it began in the lab inside the lab. Because of homeopathy’s stringent manufacturing requirements, every step of the process is controlled and documented. It makes sense, of course, to ensure consistency, high quality, and also to be able to identify where something went wrong if a batch doesn’t come out as expected.

Not only is the main laboratory environment controlled with a specific temperature, level of humidity, level of air pressure, etc. but the dilution room is even more controlled with different air circulation and air pressure.

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Inside that room, Christophe showed me the different ‘mother tinctures’–a term I’m familiar with from my herbal studies, as well as from making my own herb and gemstone essences and skincare products. The mother tincture is what’s made from the extraction (using ethanol) of the medicinal properties of the plants, minerals, insects, or other raw materials. This mother tincture is then diluted a certain number of times in order to be sure there is no remaining toxicity.

These mother tinctures have been released by quality control and are ready for dilution.

In homeopathy, the C scale and the X scale are used to determine the dilution. With the C scale (centesimal scale), each dilution is 100 times more diluted than the previous dilution. With the X scale (decimal scale), each dilution is 10 times more diluted than the previous dilution. The dilutions are done in a vacuum chamber, with a hydro-alcohol solvent and the mother tincture. Christophe demonstrated 1C, 2C, and 3C dilutions to me using the Thuja Homeopathic Remedies: How Can Something So Diluted be So Effective? •

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(Tree of Life) mother tincture. The percentages of both the tincture and the solvent were measured out using calibrated pipettes and pumps, then the bottle was closed and placed into a machine that vibrated in order to make sure the mixture was properly blended. The first dilution was with 1% mother tincture and 99% hydro-alcohol solvent, the second was with 1% of the first dilution and 99% solvent, and then the third was with 1% of the second dilution and 99% solvent. You can see in the image the difference in colour in each dilution.

Once the dilutions are prepared, the remedy’s delivery system will then be decided. The most common delivery system is sublingual pellets, but a honey-based syrup or other delivery systems might be used depending on what the remedy is for. For example, a sore throat benefits from the soothing and emollient properties of honey,

In our Western medicinebased society, we’re conditioned to associate higher dosages of active ingredients with strength and efficacy.

This isn’t how homeopathy works.

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so honey syrup is a more logical delivery system for a sore throat remedy than a sublingual pellet would be.

DON’T THE HOMEOPATHIC REMEDIES GET WEAKER WITH EACH DILUTION? In our Western medicine-based society, we’re conditioned to associate higher dosages of active ingredients with strength and efficacy. This isn’t how homeopathy works. After years of study, it’s been determined (and is documented in the HPUS) that different dilutions affect the body in different ways, and the dilution depends on the manifestation of the symptoms. Christophe explained that when a disease starts, local symptoms appear, affecting a small area of the body. The symptoms then increase in strength and in variety and become more widespread and systemic. After the disease has run its course, the symptoms disappear in reverse order (Herring’s Law) as you heal. Lower dilutions are more beneficial for the early onset local symptoms, while a medium dilution would be for more generalized symptoms, while high dilutions are indicated for more behavioural symptoms. The reactions are very subtle, and the “Neutral” pellets ready intention is never to suppress to be medicated. a symptom or process of the body like a pharmaceutical drug Homeopathic Remedies: How Can Something So Diluted be So Effective? •

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would do. Homeopathic remedies help the body’s natural healing process along and also help you cope as your body goes through its physiological process of healing.

Christophe explained that you have to look at homeopathic dilutions as different states of information rather than different strengths or quantities of matter.

Even though how homeopathic remedies differ vastly from herbal remedies in the amount of control and documentation at every stage of the process, I could really see a connection to herbalism in how the different dilutions work. Herbalism uses dilutions too, starting with an extremely potent essential oil, then you have herbal extracts and tinctures, then infusions and decoctions, and then essences.

Of course there are other herbal preparations in between, but while some are more diluted than others, they all work on symptoms in different ways. Some are better for tiny, local symptoms, others are for more generalized symptoms, and others are specifically for behavioural and emotional symptoms.

Homeopathy is possibly the safest way to consume plant medicine, and that’s because 82 • Hat Trick Magazine • hattrickstrategies.com

of the high standards companies like Boiron must adhere to. I’m not saying that FDA-regulation is the answer to all our problems, but given the controversies that exist with angel-dusting and contamination in the herb and supplement industries, seeing these stringent manufacturing practices was very refreshing.

I WANT TO GIVE A HUGE THANK YOU TO CHRISTOPHE MERVILLE AND DEBORAH KELLY AT BOIRON! I HAD A BLAST! By the way, if you want to learn more about which Boiron remedies might be right for you, check out their Medicine Finder app below!

Homeopathic Remedies: How Can Something So Diluted be So Effective? •

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“In the hopes of reaching the moon men fail to see the flowers that blossom at their feet.�

Albert Schweitzer

natural

health & beauty.

Find simple tips & recipes at VintageAmanda.com

FIND ME ONLINE HERE

By Marina BerBeryan

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THE 2ND ANNUAL WORLD ARMENIAN ENTERTAINMENT AWARDS

The Awards ceremony commenced with the applause of nearly 3,000 admirers who had awaited an entire year to see what the show had in store for them. The show was epic and unforgettable. Indeed it was the biggest and most significant award show of the year in the Armenian Community

On

ceremony at 6.00pm. Hundreds of fans and attendees gathered around the red carpet to get the best view of the arrival of the stars and celebrities, hoping for a head turn or a wave. Everyone who is anyone made an appearance on the red carpet. The evening was inevitably filled with haute couture and glitzy gowns. The fellow juries here at the LA Fashion Judge have rounded up the ‘Best Dressed – Red Carpet’ list from the show, where we felt others deserved an award as well. Overall, sheer and lace ruled the red carpet this year.

See at the end who made it to The red carpet kicked off our list, and let me know who you at 3.00pm, followed by the thought was the best dressed?

May 9th the LA Fashion Judge was invited once again to attend one of the best events of the year, The 2nd Annual World Armenian Entertainment Awards.

This spectacular star-studded gala is one of the best and well put together yearly events in Southern California. Presented and conceptualized by Garbis Titizian and Vahram Tankazian of Global Arts International and US Armenia TV at Agua Caliente Casino Resort and Spa in Palms Springs, CA.

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Angela Sarafyan, the leading actress in the movie

1915, looked radiant in a long and flowy floral-print maxi dress. The sleeveless haltered dress had a side-slit which made her look not only feminine and girly but stunning as well. Her wavy hair was parted in the middle with sides pulled back for a bohemian look. Angela’s minimal make up was all about natural and simple glam.

Marina BerBeryan, the LA Fashion Judge,

wowed her fans and audience in a jaw-dropping sheer golden Amato Haute Couture gown as she graced the red carpet at the show. The dress tightly hugged the multiple-award winning Hollywood celebrity fashion stylist and a mother of three in the waist and bared the sides of her body, outlining her slim hour-glass figure. The sleeveless shoulders featured her firm arms while the high crystal-studded collar elongated the neck for a glamorous and demure look. Marina had her hair in a sophisticated messy-bun which allowed her to show her facial features and her super glam golden complexion.

The two beautiful sisters, Maya and

Sofia Pogosyan, looked dazzling on the red carpet. Maya, editor of El Magazine, sparkled in a black full-length gown looking classy and glamorous while Sofia, host from Shant TV, looked flawless in a silver metallic dress. The blonde bombshells looked hot and ultra glam. Usually black and silver gowns are never a fail on the red carpet.

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Emmy Bejanyan, Armenian pop icon, was seen in

a black double-layered strapless Alexander McQueen dress as the tulle draped her petite body. The Eurovision Song Contest participant accessorised her look with a golden envelope purse matching her gold bracelet. Emmy glammed up her make up with red lips.

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Christine Pepelyan, pop singer and TV Host, appeared on the red carpet in a gold long sleeve dress flaunting her sexy curves. The green-eyed beauty opted for a high pony tail and a Barbie pink lip colour. To complete her look, Christine carried a gold/silver clutch with long gold earrings.

Anahid Avanesian, the leading actress in the movie

My Uncle Rafael, hit the red carpet in a slate-blue crepe silk gown that fit her so perfectly and looked like it was made just for her.

Her silver chandelier earring matched not only the crystals on the neckline of her dress but her ring as well. Anahit finalised her red carpet look with a red nail polish complementing her red lips and black long-layered hair.

Arshaluis Darbinian, TV host, from what it looked

like wore a sexy risqué ensemble, a black lace top revealing her underneath black bra paired with a black long skirt. “It’s a French designer,” she mentioned later on the stage. Arshaluis, rocked her black hair in pixie haircut with her bangs swept across her forehead. As for make-up, to match her ensemble’s colour coordination which was black, she opted for ultra smoky eyes.

However, for a pop of colour she did have red lips.

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Payla Kevorian, an upcoming artist and a singer of Ten

Million Cries, looked stunning in a nude whispery lace gown with sequence-studded belt around her waist concluding her look with red lips.

Luiza Nersisyan showed up in an aqua-green stylish cape-esque lace gown bringing the 70s back. The dress itself was an A-line shape with long and wide sleeves giving an illusion of a cape. Luiza’s hair was styled in a glam half-updo, 1970’s bouffant, raised high on the head and hanging down on the side.

Eileen Khatchadourian, singer and songwriter,

definitely has a unique style which was more on the creative side. The Best Rock Album award winner wore a dark navy hight-low sequinned skirt and a white collar shirt designed by Krikor Jabotian. To top off this ensemble Eileen added a risqué extravagant head piece which was a bouquet of beautiful blue butterflies on one side of her hair. A similar piece was seen on the Sue Wong runway during LA Fashion Week.

Karine Andreasyan, representing Etihad Airways, wore a black knee-high flare skirt with a long sleeve shirt. She matched her red nail polish with her red lips. For a pop of colour she carried a red and white clutch.

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The

evening was not just glamorous and exhilarating but emotional as well. Unlike last year, this year the award show was dedicated to the 100thAnniversary of the Armenian Genocide, commemorating the lost lives of 1.5 million Armenians during the Genocide. Additional celebrities who have helped shine global spotlight on Armenia and Armenian Genocide include Kim and Khloe Kardashian, who have raised awareness world wide by their trip to Yerevan, Armenian.

Superstar Kanye West performed a free concert at the famous Swan Lake in Armenia’s capital, Yerevan. Serj Tankian and his band, System of a Down, visited Armenia and held a massive 37-song set two hour concert. Even, Pope Francis recognized the Armenian genocide and called the killings ‘the first genocide of the 20th century.’

The Awards ceremony commenced with the applause of nearly 3,000 admirers who had awaited an entire year to see what the show had in store for them. The show was epic and unforgettable. Indeed it was the biggest and most significant award show of the year in the Armenian Community.

The ceremony and the red carpet was broadcast nationally and internationally including Europe, Russia, Armenian and South America. Additionally, online as well by US Armenia TV with over

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five million viewers via terrestrial, cable, satellite and other online platforms.

The nominees of The World Armenian Entertainment Award 2015 were announced from different categories including cinema, television, music and non-traditional media.

The Armenian talents from around the world including actors, living legends, music icons and upcoming talents were honoured and recognised with the golden statuettes. Please see the winners opposite.

Best male singer of the year Martin Mkrtchyan

Best female singer of the year Christie Pepelyan

Best male singer of diaspora Garnik Sargsyan

Best female singer of the year Eileen Kachadourian

Best song of the yea Armo ‘Ush e hima’

Best music video of the year Sofi Mkheyan ‘Erazum’ dir Lilit Movsisyan

People’s choice Silva Hakobyan

Upcoming artist of the year Payla Gevorgyan

Special awards to

Hrant Tokhatyan, Michael Poghosyan, Vahik Pirhamzei and Alina Khachateyan

Congratulations to all of the winners!

Arka Photography was the official photography service covering The 2nd Annual World Armenian Entertainment Awards. Some of the sponsors for this event include Etihad Airways, Ararat Brandy, Levon Travel, Eureka Sausage, Phoenicia Restaurant, and Nelly’s Bell Bond. Visit globalartsint.com for additional information.

Click play below to watch LA Fashion Judge, Marina BerBeryan, and super star Erik Karapetyan presenting the Best Song of The Year Award.

To learn more about me visit Marina BerBeryan and LA Fashion Judge.

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Lifestyle & Wellness

Feel More Powerful

FIND ME ONLINE HERE

By Charlene SanJenko Photo Credit: Maggi Woo photography

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Want to feel more powerful this Spring? Let’s start with how you view your fitness.

I grew up with 4 older brothers and 4 male cousins. In the 6th grade my teacher called me ‘chunky’ in front of my class. One of my main role models at that time – due to proximity – was my mother. Unfortunately, what I learned from her was that when you didn’t feel good about yourself, it was time to go on a diet.

When I was 18 years old, I set foot in my first gym. That was almost 28 years ago. It was the first time in my life that I ever felt that I could play a pro-active role with both how my body felt as well as how I felt in my body.

Throughout my 20’s, I started to experience that the stronger I felt in my body, the stronger and more confident I felt in my life. I began to play with that relationship, and I needed to take that experience as far as I possibly could for myself to see what I could learn from the process (natural body-building).

At the age of 30, I left a fairly prestigious corporate position in the financial services industry because I had a powerful mission. After a decade of professional experience, I knew with certainty that more than anything else – in my mind – the world was in need and Feel More Powerful This Spring

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still is of more confident, caring and compassionate strong women.

In 2000, I began my company, PowHERhouse, with this mission in mind: To Build Strong Women…by helping women to elevate the role that we allow fitness to play in our lives. That was 15 years ago, hundreds of clients, thousands of women I have come into contact with, and many more to come.

Why Strength-Training is an important aspect of your overall fitness program I’m going to keep this simple and touch on both the Physiological and Psychological benefits: We all know and understand that as we age we naturally begin to lose bone density and muscle mass. We’ve heard this before but it is worth repeating again. Herein lies the key physiological value of strength-training.

What I’d like to touch on today is the complementary psychological value. Let’s talk about being fit and fearless. It’s talk about power and performance. Let’s talk about aging with ease, grace and vibrancy.

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What I learned throughout my 20’s and began to teach in my 30’s and now into my 40’s is that the core benefit of a consistent strengthtraining program for women is to build a healthy relationship with their bodies. After all, our bodies are our vehicles for this lifetime. We should learn to love them.

A strength-training program includes learning the valuable connection to your core, understanding the power that comes from your pelvis, and learning to be in your body with confidence and grace that carries through to every other area in your life.

Char’s Top 10 Tips to Move Forward PowHERfully this Spring!

1. Keep it simple. Eat well. Move often.

Be positive!

Stop splitting hairs. Stop second-guessing yourself. Think about what you can see yourself doing 5 years from now and being there.

There are no short cuts. Appreciate the journey and make it your focus rather than the destination.

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2. Keep it consistent. Take it in gears.

Many of the women I begin to work with review their eating and training goals with an ‘on again – off again’ approach. You are better than that. No one deserves to live ‘on a tightrope’. Instead, I encourage you to think about it in gears.

3. Remember your ‘WHY’ – what’s your cause?

We’ve been taught the importance of goal-setting, but I’m going to encourage you to back up the bus and set a stronger foundation.

What is your cause. What it is that you can commit to for the longterm that breathes into you such a strong desire that it fuels your consistency without question.

Strong women build strong families. Strong families build strong communities. Strong communities build a bright future!

4. Ditch the sugar!

It’s cocaine.

As explained in my Kindle e-book, Freeway to Fat Loss – How to Lose Weight, Increase Energy and Fix Your Metabolism. Click the link for further information.

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5. Own the POWER in your posture & your pelvis.

We talk about ‘dressing for success’ but what about being in your body, standing with purpose and owning your space? What about your powHER stance?

“High testosterone and low cortisol, a hormone profile that is characteristic of high-status and effective leaders and is induced by power posing, is associated with reduced stress, increased sense of personal control, and increased engagement and performance in competitive tasks.” You can read the complete Harvard research article here.

6. Watch your words.

To yourself as well as your daughters and the young women in your life – they are listening – and it’s time to break the cycle.

7. Deprivation doesn’t work.

Healthy & tasty alternatives are where it’s at. I encourage all of my clients to ask themselves, “Can I see myself doing this five years from now?”

8. Recognize that we’re all BUSY…and take it out of your vocabulary.

It’s about priorities. Implement a success strategy – find out that works for you.

9. Build your toolkit We all need tips, tools and solutions to help us implement our strategy as simply and easily as possible. We also need support, motivation and inspiration. Most of all, we need accountability.

Most of my work in the past 15 years has been in this area – working personally with clients, creating women’s events and retreats, and most recently through the launch of PowHERhouse, Canada’s Lifestyle + Leadership magazine for busy women. I Feel More Powerful This Spring

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encourage you to consistently connect with us online – women from across Canada too are looking to build stronger bodies, businesses and lives.

10. It all boils down to being positive and happy.

Exercise raises your vibrational energy. Breathing deep, connecting to your core, releasing importance and wonderful endorphins. Exercise helps you to be happy. When you are happy, your perspective of your life is healthy. Who you are being with your family, in your relationships and in your community is positive.

You have the opportunity to make an impact. You are literally attractive and magnetic from an energetic level. You are connected and in your flow.

I’m going to tell you a little secret The fitness industry has held us captive. Our focus has been on the scale, and they’ve kept it there because quite frankly, it’s big business. According to US News, Americans spend $60 billion annually trying to lose weight.

My challenge to you this Spring is to elevate the role that you allow fitness to play in your life. Recognise it for what it truly is: It is a confidence catalyst, a connector, and community-builder. I 114 • Hat Trick Magazine • hattrickstrategies.com

encourage you to look past the ‘sweat & workout component’, feel strong and powHERful in your body, breathe deeply and recognise the positive energy in the room when you are doing so, take time to connect with one or two women that you don’t know when you train and celebrate the community-building that is happening while we all work to build stronger bodies, business and lives.

Pick a 7-day challenge and start.

Start, simply! Simply, start.

Here’s to a PowHERful Spring!

Feel More Powerful This Spring

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Charlene SanJenko is the Founder and CEO of PowHERhouse, a digital platform that provides solutions for women to keep them strong and powerful, evolves the role that we allow to fitness to play and our lives and celebrates positive, natural female role models in fitness, sport, business and community.

Predictions

FIND ME ONLINE HERE

By Manish Kumar Arora

Aries

21 March – 19 April You will enjoy your day in the sun and bask in the glory of success due to solid financial base and assured comforts.

Both spiritual and material treasures would be in your possession. You may have been taking on too many professional commitments of late and as a result people are getting used to presuming that you will be available and agreeable all the time and you need to calm your nerves.

You will have a very settled time in a committed relationship when much effort is being put into maintaining it and building on its existing strengths.

and implementation. Each challenge you encounter creates that initial pain, which is inevitably turned into an opportunity to grow stronger and to change the direction of your life as a result of the lessons. In love and committed relationships, you may face rejection, sadness, loneliness, heartbreak, betrayal, separation and grief. Time is a great healer and you need to move on gradually and not to lose heart.

Favourable Dates for June 3, 6, 12, 21, 24, & 30 Favourable Colours Yellow & Red

Favourable Dates for June 7, 9, 16, 18, 25 & 27 Favourable Colours Yellow & Blue

Taurus

20 April – 20 May Due to your solid planning and ongoing motivation to persist, everything is progressing steadily and as expected on professional front. Your confidence levels will rapidly increase and you will feel ready to take on the business world with your planning

Gemini 21 May – 20 June

You may be feeling in a state of self imposed powerlessness and restriction. You may be holding yourself back from taking steps to Zodiac Predictions For June 2015 •

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expand your business because you fear moving into the future, or because you are wary of getting hurt by a new situation. If you have to make a decision, you need to believe in yourself and follow your heart no matter how crazy or foolish your impulses may seem. In love, you may be unsure about where the relationship is heading and whether you can safely depend on your partner. This period is just to wait patiently for good things to happen.

and move ahead accordingly. Do not make commitments in love as time is not ripe for nurturing a relationship yet.

Favourable Dates for June 4, 5, 13, 14, 22 & 23 Favourable Colours Orange & Blue

Favourable Dates for June 4, 9, 13, 22, 27 & 30 Favourable Colours White & Blue

Cancer 21 June – 22 July

You have a strong desire to remain focussed and committed and are taking systematic and methodical approach for attaining the goals. Now is the time to draw on your years of experience and wisdom to craft an executable plan that will yield the tangible results you desire in your profession. Rivals and competitors may impose hurdles in your growth and you will need to remain emotionally mature in dealing with the negative energy from them. Trust the sensations and the feelings you are getting from your outside environment 120 • Hat Trick Magazine • hattrickstrategies.com

Leo

23 July – 22 August You are in harmony with the nature that is around you and you are able to harness this energy to bring pleasure into your life. A good business or creative climate is impending and colleagues with whom you are working will help get a project right and make it profitable. Even if you’re currently employed, expect a change for the better, both in terms of your circumstances and your pay. If you

are in a relationship then be prepared for slushy love letters, romantic gestures and open affection. Make a point to make time and space for the relationship regardless of your jobs, otherwise things will suffer.

Favourable Dates for June 3, 11, 12, 20, 21 & 29 Favourable Colours Yellow & Brown

Virgo

23 August – 22 September You are applying yourself fully to whatever is at the centre of your attention and success through perseverance is assured. You are working away at the finer details of the various aspects of your life in an effort to continuously improve your situation. You are meticulous in your approach and you make sure that everything is planned and executed down to the finest detail to create overall success. You are actually too focused on money and what you do for a living to really create space in your life for a new relationship. If you want love, make sure you genuinely need it.

Favourable Dates for June 1, 9, 12, 18, 19, & 28 Favourable Colours Red, Pink & Black

Libra

23 September – 22 October With determination and hard work, you have earned well deserved professional stability. If you continue to work toward the fulfilment of your dreams and do not allow disillusionment to dampen your enthusiasm, ultimately you will experience prosperity and success in your goals. You are now seen as a good long-term investment and others admire your professionalism and attention to detail. It is a time for being rewarded at long last for all the effort you have been putting in for so many years. Ensure that you give time and space to your beloved.

Enjoy a fine dining experience, or simply spend more time with your partner.

Favourable Dates for June 3, 6, 12, 15, 21, & 24 Favourable Colours White, Blue & Yellow

Scorpio

23 October – 21 November You have overcome the challenges along the way, and now you are focusing your energies on the one Zodiac Predictions For June 2015 •

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goal that will lead to your success.

This is your time to shine and to come out on top. You can get many people to help you as long as you keep them inspired and ensure that the aim of your project has some benefit to them as well. You shall soon see the mastery of the different elements of your life honed by your talents into a unified working method. Your charisma is at an all-time high and you can seduce a great catch with a dramatic ease.

Favourable Dates for June 1, 2, 6, 10, 11, 15, 19, 20 & 24 Favourable Colours Blue & Green

Sagittarius

22 November – 21 December If you’ve been waiting on a decision for a job that you’ve already applied for, the news is very likely to be good. The job is also likely to be better and more enjoyable than you would have hoped.

The time has come for you to revel a little in what you have accomplished.

Flow with the new change, flow with the new beginnings. You must even experience in being somewhat frank to friends, co-workers and loved ones because you need the experience of letting your breath run free. If you’re 122 • Hat Trick Magazine • hattrickstrategies.com

unattached, you’re about to enter a relationship with someone you’ve been dreaming about.

Favourable Dates for June 1, 2, 6, 10, 11, 15, 19, 20 & 24 Favourable Colours Blue & Green

Capricorn 22 December – 19 January

You have faced some difficult situations in your life during recent past. You do have the inner-strength at your disposal to handle the situation and to survive through it.

You have a strong desire now to find or rediscover a sense of meaning, inspiration, or purpose in your life. You are making some significant changes in your life, transforming yourself and in doing this you are bringing about a fresh perspective on life. You have an open heart and you now want to give back the blessings you have already received so that others may benefit.

You aren’t ready for a commitment yet, even though others may be pressing you for one.

Favourable Dates for June 2, 4, 11, 20, 22, 29 Favourable Colours Blue & Yellow

Aquarius

Pisces

20 January – 18 February

19 February – 20 March

You are nearing the point where work, success and recognition are well within your grasp. Do your best to be organized and productive. This is a time to be strong and in control.

You must also draw upon your willpower and self-discipline. Think long and hard before re-starting an old romance. Allow your beloved to give to you (whether that’s in the material or spiritual realm,) and at the same time, make sure that you are doing your fair share of giving to the relationship. If you are unattached but looking, you are likely to meet someone new who is positive, kind, and generous.

You have been flowing with life with a strong belief in successful outcomes based on faith rather than knowledge.

The unseen workings of a higher cosmic nature will bring you pleasure and luck. Be tolerant of all things and know that you are an essential part of the life-force around you. It is time to relax and not to spend so much time and energy focusing on the ‘small stuff’. Instead, welcome some unpredictability into your lives.

You may be involved with or meet someone through your work or a solid grounded start to a relationship or to a new stage of a relationship.

Favourable Dates for June 1, 2, 6, 10, 11, 19, 20, & 24 Favourable Colours Purple & Black

Favourable Dates for June 1, 3, 10, 12, 19, 21, 28, & 30 Favourable Colours White & Blue

Manish Kumar Arora. K.P. Astrologer, Numerologist, Tarot Card Reader & Vastu Consultant. Email for a personal reading or consultation at manishastrologer@rediffmail.com

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WHEN HELPING BECOMES

HARMING As humans on a spiritual path we are here to help others, right? To be kind and to spread joy throughout the world, with a side order of pixies and unicorns or whatever else lights your fire.

Well I am here to tell you to stop!

FIND ME ONLINE HERE

By Kate Spencer 124 • Hat Trick Magazine • hattrickstrategies.com

Now

don’t get me wrong, I don’t mean stop being kind, I mean stop rushing in blindly to ‘help’ people when they really need to learn to sort their own shiz out. I’m not being mean here, but I see it all of the time and I have done this myself on numerous occasions. You see someone struggling, with a life lesson, a challenge or a situation that is hard for them. They are dragging a full shit-cart up the hill called life.

And sometimes it’s a person that you love, and this tugs on your heart strings like nothing else on Earth. So you go into superhero mode and you jump in and save them – ta da!

You’ve helped…or have you?

You might have bailed them out in the moment, or been a band-aid or a crutch when they needed it most, but have you truly helped them?

We need to learn the difference between helping and fixing someone. Helping them is facilitating their own empowered change. It’s that old analogy about buying a fish, or teaching someone to fish and buying them a net.

Fixing someone is coming from you wanting to feel better because you have been a hero, this strokes our human ego and makes us feel worthy.

However, often it is far more noble and beneficial to support people from When Helping Becomes Harming

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The next time you see someone struggling and you feel like you want to help – stop, step back and breathe. the sidelines and cheer them on towards their own betterment, than it is trying to fix them. We take someone’s power away by ‘helping’ them, when helping means doing it for them. We can help them more, by helping them to help themselves.

We all come here with soul lessons that we need to learn in order to grow and expand. By muscling in on someone else’s situation, we can be stopping them from gaining the learning and experience that they need to evolve. That lesson will come around again for them until it’s learned, just like yours will.

When it does come back around, your ego will butt in with observations about them not moving on, that the same stuff is happening again and that you ‘told them so’. This is where resentment can build and relationships suffer as a result, but the thing is that you may have actually unintentionally robbed them of the chance to have a different outcome.

The next time you see someone struggling and you feel like you want to help – stop, step back and breathe. Then ask yourself the following questions: 126 • Hat Trick Magazine • hattrickstrategies.com

What can I do to help this person to help themselves, in the long and short term?

How can I sign post this person to some useful resources?

How will my actions and advice help them to take responsibility and make positive changes?

Am I coming from a place of empowerment or trying to fix them?

How can I support this person without taking over?

Hold

a clear intention that what you say, do and offer in the way of support is for the greater good of both your evolution and theirs. That way you really can look at ways to help them and not unintentionally sabotage their progress and learning as souls on this Earth.

LOVE KATE When Helping Becomes Harming

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Click below to find out more about Kate’s Law of Attraction programme online

Would you love to experience more Flow in your Stream of Abundance?

Want to get rid of the drama and experiences that weigh you down?

Do you want more income?

Do you want more moments of synchronicity and universal sign posting?

Do you want to move your life from ordinary to extraordinary?

Are you sick of settling for a substandard life?

Do you want an awesome relationship?

Would you love to have more joy and happiness?

Can you imagine being able to draw in energetically experiences that match your desires?

Would you love to have more of what you want and less of what you don’t?

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About a Homemade Year

Food, Home & Family

Rice Pudding I live in a Southern state where rice is the second largest crop produced, yet I don’t remember as a girl if I ever tasted rice pudding.

Puddings as a dessert are not popular dishes in the South. Well, puddings period! Because of this I was determined to finally make my own rice pudding. I tried so many recipes using short grain rice, long grain rice, cooked on the stove, and baked for eternity in a slow-oven that I eventually gave up on, before turning to Facebook.

Yep, I got my recipe from the trusty internet (don’t judge)!

I think it’s my new favourite breakfast meal! Dish it up in the morning, pour a little milk over it (or use cream like I do) and you have a delicious, quick and nutritious meal. Let your kids enjoy it, because really, it’s rice pudding!

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INGREDIENTS 2/3 cup Minute Rice (You can use ready cooked rice as it tastes the same)

2 3/4 cup milk 1/3 cup sugar 1 tbsp. butter 1/2 tsp. salt

METHOD

1 Combine Minute Rice, milk

& raisins, sugar, butter, salt, vanilla & nutmeg in a buttered 1 quart baking dish.

1/2 tsp. vanilla 1/4 tsp. nutmeg Cinnamon 1/2 cup raisins (As a southerner I always add chopped pecans. About 1/2 cup.)

! y o j n E

2 Bake in 350 degree oven for 1 hour, stirring after 15 mins and again when pudding is done.

3 Sprinkle with cinnamon.

4 Finally, serve warm or

chilled. Pudding thickens as it stands.

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You’re Not

Listening!

By Cherie DeBurger 134 • Hat Trick Magazine • hattrickstrategies.com

A parent faces many obstacles raising a child, the list is never ending. Instead of the list getting smaller as they get older it just changes to reflect whatever age group he/she is in.

One of the biggest complaints that I hear about from parents is how kids don’t listen. Most of the time it’s not a matter of being out of ear range or that you aren’t talking loudly enough, often this happens even when your child is standing right in front of you.

All parents have witnessed the glassy haze of disinterest slowly descend over their offspring’s previously bright and dancing young eyeballs like blinds being lowered down over a window.

It doesn’t matter if we are giving them advice, instructions, or just trying to get their attention they have that ability to totally tune us out. My kids can be watching a cartoon and a tornado could rip through the front part of the house and they would still be sitting there with their mouths hanging open and an almost unblinking continuous stare at the TV screen.

I can yell someone’s name five times while balancing on one leg standing on a chair waving pompoms and twirling sparklers as I tell them to put their dishes in the dishwasher or to pick up their You’re Not Listening! •

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clothes and unbelievably get no response. At that point I wonder if I should be checking their pulse or put a mirror in front of their mouth or under their nose to check their breathing.

In the next minute I can walk upstairs, go into the master bedroom, open my closet door and climb up through the trap door into the attic. I could then tiptoe over to the opposite side of the house amidst all the insulation and cob webs and whisper that I am debating letting the kids stay home from school for a fun day. By the time I make my way across the attic and down the trap door into the closet back through my bedroom, around the corner and onto the stairs the children are already celebrating that they don’t have to go to school.

But if you think about it can you really blame then? Aren’t they just exhibiting learned behaviour from watching the master’s… us? Most mothers have the ability to tune out their children while still knowing exactly what is going on. It is our superpower and without this capability I believe the majority of us would not survive motherhood with our sanity intact. There had to be some way to protect us against the never-ending questions, requests, or just plain nonsense talk that seems to bubble forth like an inexhaustible fountain.

I have come to the conclusion that people without children do not have this built-in ability to tune kids out. I can tell by just watching my sister or younger brother who have no children.

136 • Hat Trick Magazine • hattrickstrategies.com

I can have an entire conversation while holding a child who is trying to grab my nose, as another child is pulling on my leg, while yet another child is repeatedly asking me if we can buy every toy that is advertised on TV. I have come to the conclusion that people without children do not have this built-in ability to tune kids out. I can tell by just watching my sister or younger brother who have no children and the way it drives them totally insane whenever they try to have a conversation with me.

It can be a precarious balancing act knowing when to listen and when not to. Of course there are times when we disregard what a child is saying because all kids like to embellish or dramatise things. After all aren’t children known for their imaginations, and any mother knows they can come up with some real hum-dingers!

My mum told us a story once of something that happened when my sister was just around six or seven. She had gone shopping and picked up my sister some new spring clothes and a fancy new shiny pair of patent leather shoes.

When Sunday rolled around and it was time to go to church my mum dressed my sister in one of her new frilly spring dresses and the perfect shiny pair of shoes. She looked like a little doll but kept complaining about how uncomfortable she was and how the shoes were hurting her feet.

The church was very quiet as the preacher delivered his sermon except for the odd cough or the low rumble of a passing semi and…my sister. The more she complained the louder she got

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and my mother’s attempts to quiet her down and tell her to stop complaining were sounding less and less like a whisper. She tried to explain to my sister that the shoes felt funny and stiff because they were new but that she would get used to them.

When the service was finally done and they got home and were putting away the good clothes my mum took off the shoes checked them again to see if maybe something was wrong inside that would cause my sister to make such a fuss. It was then that she realised that she had forgotten to remove the tissue paper that the store had placed in the toes of the patent leather shoes.

No wonder my sister had been complaining, and of course my mum felt horrible. In fact whenever anyone brings up the memory to tease her she says she still feels guilty about it even after all these years, but the unending guilt of motherhood is a whole other article.

For me it’s a crap shoot, I can’t listen to everything they say all the time or else I would never have time to do anything else. So I listen to as much as I can and hope that I don’t make the mistake of absent mindedly saying “okay” when they ask if they can get a pet snake or jump out the second story window to practice our fire escape route.

If you have any comments then please feel free to email me at lifes.moments@live.ca 138 • Hat Trick Magazine • hattrickstrategies.com

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