2023 HCDS Spring Benefit Digital Event Journal

Dear Guests,

It is an honor to welcome you to the red carpet at The Tulip Knoll Film Festival – Harbor’s 28th Annual Spring Benefit!

As it should be, traditions like this are cherished at Harbor, and we are sincerely grateful for the dedication and support of our Parents’ & Alumni Associations. The extraordinary volunteerism that culminates this evening and that we celebrate throughout our school community speaks to the strength of our partnership – and to the commitment our families make.

Tonight is about celebrating and amplifying the mission at Harbor Country Day School. It’s going to be a memorable night full of opportunities to support the program. But most importantly, this is a way for us to honor the faculty, staff, and children – they are the true stars of the show – and will undoubtedly benefit from your generosity.

With admiration and gratitude,

Andy Sperling Head of School

TABLE OF CONTENTS*

*The 28th Annual Benefit journal is interactive and any text that is blue, as well as logos and some images, are hyperlinked to other parts of the journal or to a website.

Harbor Country Day School’s 28th Spring Benefit

The Tulip Knoll Film Festival

Friday, March 24, 2023

8:30 pm -------------

Honoring -----------

Alyson Richman ‘87

Author & Former Student of James Swink & James C. Swink

Former HCDS English Teacher

Elaina DeLew: Auction Coordinator

7:00 pm: Casino Tables & Silent Auction Open

8:30 pm: Honoree Presentation & Event Program

9:30 pm: Casino Reopens & Buffet Dinner Begins

10:30 pm: Silent Auction & Casino Tables Close

10:45pm: Power Raffle Winners Pulled

The 28th Annual Spring Benefit is Presented by:

The Wei Family

MISSION, MOTTO & DIVERSITY STATEMENT OUR MISSION

"HARBOR CHERISHES CHILDHOOD, CULTIVATES WONDER AND INSPIRES CONFIDENT LEARNERS AND LEADERS."

These are the core, guiding principles at Harbor Country Day School, and the source of both our vision and energy. We measure our performance against a "portrait" of the academic and social development we strive to foster in every Harbor student.

Harbor graduates are:

• Fearless learners and reflective leaders who negotiate effectively

• Prepared to exhibit compassion and tolerance in a global community, owing to a solid moral and ethical foundation

• Culturally experienced and conversant in the humanities and the sciences

• Prepared to achieve their dreams because they view themselves as works continually in progress

These are the aspirations we have for our students. They parallel the values and aspirations of the school’s founders, and are reflected in the work and passion of our school leaders, faculty, and board of trustees. Our mission guides us in making decisions, and in setting the standards by which the curriculum is evaluated. Moreover, these principles provide the touchstone by which the need for change in the future can be assessed.

OUR MOTTO

"SINE LABORE NIHIL - WITHOUT WORK NOTHING"

From its very beginning in 1958, the motto of Harbor Country Day School has been the same, from the Latin poet Horace: "Sine labore nihil," translated as, "Without work nothing." For six decades, our graduates have remembered the school’s motto as one of life’s truths -- that nothing comes without hard work. The students are taught how to work with purpose, and also how to make it fun. Preschoolers may sing songs in Mandarin at the Confucius Institute’s annual Chinese New Year Celebration; science students may travel on the school’s bus to explore and analyze nearby wetlands; and English class may read, discuss, and write about a complex novel that strikes at the heart of a young adolescent’s concerns. Harbor teaches and shows by example that creative, purposeful, enjoyable work is an essential part of a fully-lived life.

OUR DIVERSITY STATEMENT

Harbor believes celebrating diversity enriches the lives of everyone, and that embracing the essence of each individual makes us stronger as a school community. We honor different perspectives, cultures, ways of life and the beliefs people bring when they walk through our doors. As a result, our students possess the moral and ethical foundation that prepares them to live with compassion and empathy in a global world.

Drawing by Current Kindergartner Student, Olivia, when she was in PK4 to Commemorate 2021 Martin Luther King, Jr. Day

ABOUT HARBOR COUNTRY DAY SCHOOL

Founded in 1958 by a group of devoted parents, Harbor Country Day School is a nonprofit, independent school for preschool through eighth grade located on Long Island’s north shore, nestled in the quiet Village of Head of the Harbor. It’s a school where children are encouraged to be who they are and where differences are celebrated. Because of this solid foundation of acceptance and love, students at Harbor are confident, self-aware, and happy -- and they love to come to school.

Harbor students approach learning with a fearlessness that only comes from knowing that they will be safe and accepted regardless of whether they succeed or fail. They embrace the hard work that comes with a rigorous curriculum like Harbor’s because they are taught from the day they enter the school how to work with purpose, and how to make it fun.

Public speaking, community service, athletics, cross-divisional mentoring programs, upper school leadership retreats, social-emotional learning programs -- all of these opportunities, and so many more, help children realize their full potential as individuals and as leaders so that when they leave Harbor, they are fully prepared to master the challenges of secondary school, college, and life beyond.

Harbor Country Day School is chartered by the New York State Board of Regents and is accredited by, and a member of, the New York State Association of Independent Schools (NYSAIS). It is a non-sectarian, nonprofit organization under section 501(c)(3) of the IRS Code governed by a self-perpetuation board of trustees.

ABOUT OUR PARENTS’ ASSOCIATION

PARENTS’ ASSOCIATION CO-CHAIRS

Devan Finamore

Christine Mellert

The Parents’ Association is dedicated to promoting a sense of community, facilitating communication between Harbor and its families, and raising funds for programs and events that enrich and enhance school life. Parents’ Association participation is an amazing opportunity to get to know other families, experience a slice of Harbor students’ school lives, and become involved in the life of Harbor. The group meets on a monthly basis. For more information about the many ways parents can contribute, the Parents’ Association coordinators may be reached at parents association@hcdsny.org.

Below is a list of events and programs the Parents’ Association sponsors:

ANNUAL SPRING BENEFIT

The Parents’ Association’s major fundraising event is the annual Spring Benefit, which is an exciting and elegant evening for parents, alumni, trustees, friends, faculty, and staff. The event includes live and silent auctions, dancing, dinner, and open bar. Live and silent auction items are donated by the Harbor community and many local merchants who support our mission. Other highlights of the evening include Harbor’s Own Budding Artists Collection and the "Fund-A-Grant" paddle raise, which gives attendees an opportunity to donate directly to specific school initiatives at a designated level of support. Previous Fund-A-Grant items have included new student iPads, SMART boards, technology advancement, science lab equipment, physical education and recess equipment, and professional development.

BOOK FAIR

The Book Fair celebrates the love of reading with our children. Each student may purchase books from the Book Fair during school hours. In addition, in an effort to enrich the classroom and school libraries, we promote the Teacher’s Wish List program, enabling teachers to select desired books for their classroom libraries. Parents have the opportunity to purchase these books for the school, and an acknowledgment of the family’s generosity is affixed to the inside of the book.

FAMILY FUN NIGHT

Family Fun Night is a great evening of family fun, challenges and healthy competition, with ‘heart-pounding’ activities for all ages to enjoy. All students and their families are invited to come, bring their best game and/or their best cheering voices and enjoy! This event is typically held off the Harbor campus at a sports facility. Food and refreshments are served.

GINGERBREAD EXTRAVAGANZA

All students are invited to take part in making delicious edible gingerbread houses during Harbor’s annual Gingerbread Extravaganza. Gingerbread materials are bought fresh from a local bakery, with the houses assembled and ready for decorating. This event is a favorite of all students, as they relish this opportunity to explore their inner architects and designers.

HARBOR CLOSET

The Harbor Closet is a collection of gently used uniforms that have been donated by Harbor families. It is open to all families throughout the year, and families are encouraged to take what they might be able to use and donate what they no longer need.

TRUNK OR TREAT

Trunk or Treat is a cherished, longstanding Harbor tradition. All students, young alumni, and their families are invited to arrive in costume to enjoy a safe and frightfully fun-filled time trick-or-treating on the grounds of Harbor Country Day School. A designated area is turned into a safe "neighborhood" of decorated and treat-filled car trunks for our little goblins to enjoy. Children also enjoy fun games, story-telling, performances, and DJ-directed dancing.

ABOUT HARBOR’S ALUMNI ASSOCIATION

Harbor’s Alumni Relations Office helps to foster and continue lasting relationships between Harbor’s alumni and the school they graduated from and love. The foundation for these relationships is built through communication, organized group events, opportunities to volunteer, and helping to create connections among Harbor’s many alumni.

The Harbor Alumni Facebook page is an online community where alumni can reminisce about Nissequogue and Nesconset competitions, Greenkill and Frost Valley trips, the Spring Musical, Trunk or Treat, and other Harbor traditions and experiences that have formed the basis of so many lifelong friendships. We encourage you to visit the page and take time to share your personal stories, reconnect with us at Harbor, network with your fellow alumni, and become an active member of the vibrant Harbor alumni community. You may also keep abreast of happenings at Harbor by following the school’s official Facebook page, Instagram, YouTube, Twitter, and LinkedIn feeds.

Yet another way you may stay connected to Harbor is through our official school communications, such as The Weekly Update, our This Week in Pictures slideshow, and our semi-annual Harbor Highlights magazines. If you haven’t done so recently, please take a moment to update your contact information with our Alumni Questionnaire so we can be sure that you are receiving these communications.

Finally, if you happen to be in the area, why not make plans to stop by Harbor for a visit? We always welcome our alumni with open arms, at any time of the year, and our current students enjoy the opportunity to visit with the alumni who walked the halls of Tulip Knoll before them.

Click on the images to hear messages from our Alumni: (L to R) Oliver Hill ’11, Alexa DeAngelis ’08, and Dessy Bubaris ’08

The Tulip Knoll Film Festival

OUR SPRING BENEFIT PLANNING COMMITTEE

2023 Benefit Planning Committee

Cynthia Lippe

Ned Puchner

Jennifer Tona

Auction and Raffle Basket Coordinators

Brooke Bergen

Jennifer Chai

Elaina DeLew

Linda Gribbin

Lauren Kolbeck

Stephanie Labelson

Ariya Lapan

Paige Lawrence

Nancy Puchner

Ned Puchner

Sisa Suriel

Jennifer Tona

AV Coordinator

Artie Weissbach

Presentation Committee

Bob Gaffney ‘76

Emma Hicks Pearce ‘88

Alyson Richman ‘87

Master of Ceremonies

Bob Gaffney ‘76

Featured Film Production

John Ciotta

Evan Field

Cynthia Lippe

Ned Puchner

Invitation Design

Jennifer Taggart

Partnership Coordinators

Andrea Dagnelli Cristobal ‘86

Cynthia Lippe

Margaret Pai

Ned Puchner

Photo Coordinator

Caitlin Packard

Student Art Auction

Event Day Logistics & Event Execution

James Grillo ‘19

Caitlin Packard

Jennifer Taggart

Artie Weissbach

Event Design & Decor

Brooke Bergen

Nikki Ciotta

Susan Duffy

Kerry Phelan

Event Journal Graphic Design

Angela Kissell Event Communications

Ali Hinkaty Special Thanks

Diane Abrams

Heidi Giffuni

Laura Huang Ernst

Christine McBrien

Lynda McKenna

Caitlin Packard

Andy Sperling

Additional thanks to Harbor’s Faculty and Administrators for their continued support and generosity.

28TH SPRING BENEFIT HONOREES

ALYSON RICHMAN ‘87 Author & Former Student of James Swink

Alyson Richman is the USA Today bestselling and #1 international bestselling author of several historical novels including The Velvet Hours, The Garden of Letters, and The Lost Wife, which is currently in development for a major motion picture. Alyson graduated from Harbor Country Day School and later attended Wellesley College with a degree in art history and Japanese studies. She herself is an accomplished painter, and her novels combine her deep love of art, historical research, and travel. Alyson’s novels have been published in twenty-five languages and have reached the bestseller lists both in the United States and abroad. She lives on Long Island with her husband and two children, where she is currently at work on her next novel. * * *

JAMES C. SWINK (1950-1991) Former HCDS English Teacher

James C. Swink was a beloved English teacher at Harbor from 1977 –1987. A native of Wadesboro, North Carolina, he graduated from UNC Chapel Hill with a Bachelors in English and a Masters in Teaching. His kindness and dedication to bringing out the best in his students made him a favorite teacher for many. He is credited by many alumni for instilling in them a love of reading and writing that endures to this day. His passing at such a young age is a loss that is still felt by those who knew him.

MEMORIES OF MR. SWINK…

From Frank de Knipp, Harbor Faculty 1984-2009

Jim Swink had an English room just a door down from me and I got to know him. He welcomed me to the school and helped me every chance he got. He would just look in to see what was going on and, since I was the bridge between the lower and upper school, he went ahead and let me know, "these are the expectations I have for my students when they come in," so I could make sure they were prepared.

All I can say is that you know the children just absolutely loved him. When he taught a lesson, let’s say it’s on Shakespeare or anybody, he just sucked the kids right into the classroom. Here we’re talking about someone who lived way back when, but it never seemed like it. I’d walk by his room every now and then, and I’d stand in the corner, and it was like, "Whoa, this is great!"

Mr. Swink was the epitome of a gentleman. Dressed the part, acted the part, and if a student walked into his classroom when he was on a break, it was the student’s time. He could be any place in the school if a student approached him, and that included somebody in the lower school or a parent, and he would always make time for them. He never looked at his watch. You were his focus. He was just a wonderful man.

MEMORIES OF MR. SWINK…

From Michael Scheman ’81

Jim Swink was someone who encouraged nonconformists.

Junior High School can be an awful time, and my two years at Harbor were pretty miserable. But Jim Swink’s classroom was always a haven for those of us who couldn’t care less about the Islanders or who it was cool to ignore that day. With Jim, what counted was your imagination, your creative ideas, and yes, God help me, even your sensitivity. He pondered my Tony Award predictions, helped me prep for our G&S shows, and genuinely seemed to care about whatever new story I’d just written. He inspired in me a love of literature and an appreciation for the potency of language. He was a phenomenal listener, a shoulder to cry on, and when you made him laugh, it made your week. I think of him often, whether I notice To Kill a Mockingbird on my bookshelf or when someone auditions for me with Our Town. He will always live on in my memory; An unforgettable teacher and champion of the outsiders.

From Elisa Sickman Zied ‘84

When I think back to my short time at Harbor Country Day School in the early 80s, the teacher I remember most, not only for his vibrancy and distinctive voice but for his kindness, is Mr. Swink. While it had been my intent to stay at Dawnwood, the public junior high school I attended with friends I’d grown up with, a mean girl who bullied me and turned many of my so-called friends against me led me to transfer to Harbor Country Day School for 8th grade. Attending Harbor proved to be an invaluable decision, not only because of the 17 other students in my class who welcomed me, the new girl, with open arms but because of encouraging, supportive teachers like Mr. Swink. Whether praising my recitation of the "Friends, Romans, countrymen" speech from Julius Caesar or complimenting me on my voice after singing "I’m Gonna Wash

That Man Right Out of My Hair" in the school-wide talent show, small details from 40 years ago that I’ve never forgotten, Mr. Swink always had a kind word. He gave me confidence and made me feel smart and talented. He also made me feel like I could accomplish anything I set my mind to. Although I wish I’d known him far longer than I did, and wish his time on this earth were at least double what it was, his impact on me and so many students lucky enough to have known him is everlasting.

MEMORIES OF MR. SWINK…

From Jeffrey Lipitz ’82

I attended Harbor Country Day School in 1981 and 1982, and they were the most memorable experiences in my entire academic career. I cannot recall any of my high school and college professors’ names, but at HCDS I can tell you that my Science Teacher was Ms. Scott, my Social Studies Teacher was Mr. Russell, my Math Teacher was Mr. Bruin, my Gym Teacher was Mr. Bonoro, and of course, Mr. James Swink was my English Teacher.

Mr. Swink was an extremely influential teacher because he had such a passion for not just teaching but for the subject matter as well. I recall the coursework being rigorous but enjoyable. He was one of those teachers that you wanted to do your best for. He had a way of bringing out the best in your ability. I do not recall any specific assignments, but I do recall reading some of the classics such as Animal Farm, Of Mice and Men, and Lord of The Flies. We had in-depth discussions about these books in and out of the classroom, and I was always excited to read what was next on the list.

Mr. Swink sparked the interest that I currently have for reading, and I am still an avid reader to this very day. I remember in my early 30s I went out and purchased a few classics that I read at HCDS and enjoyed them as much as I did in 8th and 9th grades.

I am sure that if Mr. Swink was with us today, he would have been on the Goodreads app, and I would be following him and reading his reviews of books and reading along with him.

When I asked my fellow classmates to share some thoughts about Mr. Swink, they all recalled his love for the theater. I do remember that as well. I recall we put on the plays The Pirates of Penzance and The HMS Pinafore. He was very involved in these productions, and he made sure that they went off without issue. Marlowe Bechmann (Scheyer ‘82) wrote, "Mr. Swink knew how to make literature relevant and exciting and was able to connect to 7th graders. I was always excited to go to English class and still clearly remember our class discussions on Animal Farm, A Separate Peace, A Catcher in the Rye, and many others. He was always my favorite teacher and it was my favorite subject because of that."

On a more personal note, I do recall that he was an immaculate dresser, and he used to wear a vest with his dress shirts. I am a car aficionado, and he drove a Honda Civic. I remember the day he showed me his car and how the car had a manual choke to help it warm up in cold weather. (cont’d...)

MEMORIES OF MR. SWINK…

From Jeffrey Lipitz ’82 (Cont’d)

The craziest personal memory I have of him was when I was with my grandparents in Italy and we were standing on top of the Spanish Steps, and I said to my grandmother, "See that guy down there? That is my English teacher, Mr. Swink!" She did not believe me, and I screamed down to him "HEY MR. SWINK…" He turned around but did not see us immediately. We went down to say hello, and I still recall how he jokingly said: "I go halfway around the world to get away from these kids, and they still find a way to find me!" We all had a good laugh! That is a memory that I will always remember and still makes me smile to this very day.

I would like to thank Harbor for asking me to share some thoughts about Mr. Swink for the HCDS Spring Benefit. If Mr. Swink was here, I know that he would be so proud to be honored this evening, and I would have loved the opportunity to thank him for all he has done for me in person, but I know that he is with us all tonight with a book and lesson plan in hand.

Writing these memories was an absolute pleasure and warmed my heart with special memories and took me back to a place where I felt most at home, My Harbor Country Day School. I cannot thank HCDS enough, and especially, Mr. Swink for all they did for me back then, to this very day, and in my personal, academic, and professional life.

From Harry Lerner ‘80

I remember Mr. Swink explaining to us how the Southern accent could be wonderfully sweet when you speak it like this, but menacingly sinister when you speak it like that. That had to be one of his greatest gifts. When he read To Kill a Mockingbird from behind his lectern, he delivered the full range of voices, from innocent to frightening, often in the same breath, with incomparable authenticity. It was totally mesmerizing, and my 7th-grade classmates and I would sit spellbound and silent for the entire class period. Interestingly, even though Joseph Heller’s Catch-22 took place far away from the Deep South, Mr. Swink’s reading aloud of the section where Snowden lay dying in the back of the plane had that same sweet menace. I’ve never heard it the same way from anyone else. It was pure magic. This was one of many gifts Mr. Swink left behind. I am sad not to be able to tell him how I feel about him or the impact that he had on me.

2023 FUND-A-GRANT

FACULTY PROFESSIONAL DEVELOPMENT

Harbor students create, imagine, wonder, and learn through the inspiration of their teachers. Professional development keeps our teachers current and on the cutting-edge of the best practices in their fields. This Fund-a-Grant will ensure that workshops and conferences on topics such as the Teachers College Reading and Writing Project, Singapore Math, upper school curriculum development, and social/emotional learning continue to inspire our teachers to strive for excellence in the classroom and beyond. Going forward, and where appropriate, Harbor’s faculty professional development will be infused with experiences centered around STEAM-based theories, strategies, and structures as a means to inspire and to build expertise.

PRESCHOOL CLASSROOM FURNITURE

Harbor’s preschool classrooms are in need of updated furniture! As a nonprofit institution, Harbor is not always able to dedicate funds to these types of purchases, despite their necessity. It is essential that our spaces reflect the premier program that we are known for as Early Childhood education is the foundation upon which a child’s formal education begins. The goal of this Fund-a-Grant item is to provide Harbor’s youngest students with new, appropriately-sized furnishings to allow for all types of play, exploration, and discoveries (learning!).

INDOOR RECESS ACTIVITIES & MATERIALS

Experts at The American Academy of Pediatrics agree that recess is absolutely essential to a child’s health and development. In fact, students actually do better in school as a result of the cognitive, social, emotional, and physical benefits that come from playtime. Unfortunately, Mother Nature doesn’t always cooperate!

All too often, rainy and excessively cold days force Harbor’s students to remain indoors. New games and materials, expressly for indoor recess use, will help to channel Harbor students’ abundant energy so that time spent enjoying recess indoors will be no less productive - or enjoyable!

THE

The 2023

Spring Benefit

TULIP KNOLL FILM FESTIVAL

Congratulations to Honorees Alyson

Richman ‘87 & James Swink

We are proud to support Harbor Country Day and its dedicated and talented faculty, students, and alumni

Our best wishes for a wonderful evening THE RYAN FAMILY

LOVE

HEALS, HOPE GROWS Keeping Families Close in Suffolk County

Our mission is to build a community of compassionate care by creating and supporting programs that directly improve the health and wellbeing of sick children and their families. Our Family Rooms at Stony Brook Children’s Hospital have served

thousands since opening in 2013. Realizing the overwhelming need, we are planning to build a new House on the Stony Brook campus. The new House will provide respite for families, just steps away from their sick child. We hope you will join our community committed to ensuring that we serve as many families as possible.

For further information, visit www.rmhcnym.org/ capitalcampaign/

Ali Hinkaty (HCDS)

Andy Sperling (HCDS)

Applebees (Lake Grove)

Appliance World (Huntington)

Argyle Theater (Babylon)

Artie Weissbach (HCDS)

Brianna DiPaola (HCDS)

Cactus Salon (Stony Brook)

Caitlin Packard (HCDS)

Carly Lange (HCDS)

Coquus (Northport)

Costco (Lake Grove)

Crayola Experience (Easton, PA)

Dana Amir (HCDS)

Danielle Martino (HCDS)

Dawn King (HCDS)

Donna Siani (HCDS)

eatMosaic (St. James)

Elements Massage (Smithtown)

Energetic Well (Manhattan/Virtual)

Engeman Theater (Northport)

Fresh Catch Seafood (St. James)

Funk & Swagger (Northport)

Gray’s Jewelers (St. James)

Iberico Restaurant (St. James)

Jackie Riegel (HCDS)

Jennifer Taggart (HCDS)

Kandra Kane (HCDS)

Kristin Jones (HCDS)

La Vida Massage (Smithtown)

LI Explorium (Port Jefferson)

Mercep Brothers Butcher Shop (St. James)

Mickey’s Ice Cream (St. James)

Muses Nail Salon (St. James)

Natalie Badolato (HCDS)

Nicole Casali (HCDS)

Nicole Fotis (HCDS)

Patio Italian Kitchen (St. James)

Pedego Electric Bikes (Stony Brook)

Port Jefferson/Bridgeport Ferry (Port Jefferson)

Rachel Weir (HCDS)

Rafael Vineyards (Peconic)

Ralph Pepe (HCDS)

Ryan Katz (HCDS)

Seaqua Deli (St. James)

Soccer Shots (St. James)

Sonia Rodriguez (HCDS)

Soul Brew GC (St. James)

St. James Pork and Pasta (St. James)

Stony Brook Chocolate (Stony Brook)

Sweet Soul Bakery (St. James)

The Jazz Loft (Stony Brook)

Three Village Inn (Stony Brook)

Uncle Giuseppe’s (Smithtown)

Urban Air (Lake Grove)

Xplore Commack (Commack)