1970-2025
REWIND: 1983 YEARS
With AC/DC set to return to
next week, a return to one of the many times when the legendary band graced the cover of
UPFRONT
ANTISEMITIC REMARKS BY WIFE OF CLEVELAND HEIGHTS MAYOR LEAD TO PROTEST AT CITY HALL, CALLS FOR HIS RESIGNATION
THE COMPLAINTS SURROUNDING the behavior of Cleveland Heights Mayor Kahlil Seren and his so-called First Lady, Natalie McDaniel, continue. And have now shifted into legal territory.
Last week, a complaint made to the U.S. Equal Employment Opportunity Commission accused McDaniel of making a string of racial and antisemitic remarks both in person and via text message involving a number of Jewish city workers and constituents going back to last April.
In the filing, former employee Patrick Costigan related a collection of McDaniel’s outbursts: calling a planning director a “pawn” of the Orthodox Jewish community; referring to a frequent public commentator as “that Jewish bitch”; suggesting that Planning Commission Chair Jessica Cohen and another employee were “fucking each other,” the complaint reads, “simply because they are both Orthodox Jews.”
“What qualifications does this brood mare have?” McDaniel wrote in
a text thread, referring derogatorily to Cohen’s large family size. “She is destined for a glue factory and the days drag on.”
“Why is she there?” McDaniel continued. “Is this for Jewish worship?”
The comments led Costigan to quit in March. “The frequency and severity of these offensive and anti-Semitic comments created a hostile work environment for Mr. Costigan and gave him no choice but to seek medical leave from the city,” the charge reads.
Other top leaders have quit as well, including former City Administrator Dan Horrigan, who departed just months into the job due to McDaniel’s behavior.
Calls have been raised for Seren to step down.
And yesterday evening before city council’s regular meeting, a protest was staged in front of Cleveland Heights City Hall to decry McDaniel’s antisemitic comments.
“Many residents are calling for
accountability, transparency and change,” an organizing group said in a statement to Scene. “Hate, verbal abuse, volatile behavior, bullying, intimidation are NOT welcome in Cleveland Heights. NOT WELCOME.”
At the meeting, residents demanded an apology by Seren and called for him to step down, according to Cleveland. com.
“You’re of no use to us, and you’re only doing more damage every day that you’re here,” one said.
Seren did not speak during the meeting except to briefly tell residents he was there to listen and would release a statement soon.
Jessica Cohen, who declined a request for comment to Scene on Monday, told the Cleveland Jewish News that she was incensed to hear McDaniel—a person she’s never met—had zeroed in on her and her family’s faith in her private criticism.
“What is beyond comprehension is that Ms. McDaniel, who holds no offi-
cial role in our government, is allowed to roam City Hall, attend meetings and spew slurs—unchecked and unaccountable,” Cohen wrote in a statement. “Were she a city employee, her words alone would warrant immediate dismissal.”
“I will not be intimidated. I will not be silenced,” she added. “And I will not be driven out.”
Emails sent by Horrigan and Andrea Heim, the performance improvement coordinator who was put on administrative leave by Seren in April after reporting an outburst by McDaniel to HR, point to an incident on December 4 as a key plot point. McDaniel showed up to City Hall expecting to be a part of a certain meeting; she found out she was not invited.
In CCTV footage provided to Scene, McDaniel is seen in an overcoat and sunglasses storming towards Seren’s office around 12:58 p.m. After Seren exits, she leads him to a room down the hall, where, around 1:18 p.m., McDaniel
Natalie McDaniel (left) seen at Cleveland Heights City Hall on December 6, in a incident of outbursts that led to the resignation of former City Administrator Dan Horrigan.
| Photo courtesy Cleveland Heights
seems to bang on the window glass, pointing fingers and yelling.
The police were eventually called. “I could hear her screaming at Patrick [Costigan],” an officer’s report reads. “I could hear her cursing loudly, saying ‘fuck’ and ‘bitch’ multiple times. This was occurring during City Hall business hours whereas employees and citizens were openly walking around.”
It is not the first or only time police have been called for a dispute involving Seren or McDaniel.
On April 23, Cleveland Heights police were called again when Cuyahoga County Judge David Matia drove by Seren and McDaniel’s house and lobbed a complaint that they should maintain their home better, telling McDaniel they should paint.
McDaniel yelled back.
Seren then drove over to Matia’s house. “I made it clear that he’s not welcome on my property,” Matia told the responding officer. “Just go paint your house, buddy, and leave me alone.”
Matia refused to file a police report but noted his thoughts on Seren’s administration. “From what I’ve been seeing, there’s not a lot of stability over there” at City Hall, he said.
In a sitdown interview with Seren earlier this year, the mayor defended his wife’s presence at City Hall, excusing her behavior due to her role as his “first lady”—a partner in policy decisions he has the right to assign.
“I value her opinion and I’ve asked for it,” Seren told Scene. “If a particular perspective or opinion or idea has value in my view, then I don’t care where it comes from.”
“I do, though, recognize that the first lady is somebody that I trust to understand what I’m trying to do here in this city,” he added.
An attorney representing Costigan, Sean Sobel, said that he felt the numerous complaints against McDaniel were more than sufficient to bring to county court, which will be the case if both parties can’t successfully mediate.
Which Sobel said might not be a problem for his client.
“The law requires severe, pervasive conduct that affects the terms of employment,” Sobel said. “Obviously these are allegations that rise well above what the law requires.”
A spokesperson from Cleveland Heights City Hall did not respond to a request to comment. – Mark Oprea
Cleveland Rape Crisis Center Workers Accuse Management of Union Busting, Threaten to Strike
A year after employees of the Cleveland Rape Crisis Center unionized, several claim that leadership has yet to fully respect that decision.
A handful of case managers and their union reps stood on the sidewalk outside CRCC’s Clark-Fulton location last Wednesday morning to criticize higher ups, especially CRCC President Nicole McKinney-Johnson, for failing to bargain with the year-old union in good faith.
That harangue, in partnership with the Service Employees International Union District 1199, came a week after SEIU charged CCRC of bad-faith bargaining, or refusing to take their grievances seriously, according to documents filed May 8 with the National Labor Relations Board.
They were the sorts of complaints that led to an overwhelming union vote last April, of 32 to six in favor, that funneled into Tuesday’s outcry: understaffing; overbearing workloads; lack of top-down transparency; and layoffs last year that seemed to avoid letting go white employees.
“Since the employees first unionized, leadership has created more and more top-level positions,” Nicole Sigurdson, an organizer with SEIU 1199, told press in attendance, “eroding our power by unilaterally deciding these positions will not be represented by the union.”
Irritation with C-suite executives, and a feeling of their unwillingness to listen to outside thought, has pushed several worker bases into seeking union cards as a way to combat work environments turned hostile—from Starbucks baristas to healthcare workers at a GE facility in Aurora.
And on Tuesday, 76 employees at the Cleveland Museum of Natural History filed petitions to form a union, under the years-long claim that CEO Sonia Winner’s my-way-or-the-highway approach to leadership led to a massive string of layoffs and departures since 2019.
For Jessica Acord, a clinical manager at CRCC who’s been here since 2020, said that a top-down dismissal of union concerns has led to an uptick in visits to HR—herself included.
“Calling someone ‘negative’ is a really great way to dismiss what they have to say,” Acord said, referring to leadership. “It’s like talking to a wall. They’ve already decided they’re right, and what we have to say doesn’t matter.”
SEIU reps present told Scene that CRCC will head to the bargaining table in late May and early June, with hopes that their concerns—especially high client loads—will be alleviated by a new agreement.
A spokesperson for CRCC did not respond to Scene in time for publication.
“We will bargain in good faith with the union to develop a contract that supports the long-term success of both our employees and CRCC,” a statement last year to Signal Cleveland read.
“As we move forward together,”
they added, “we will continue to remain fiercely focused on our mission and meeting the needs of survivors of sexual violence who lean on us for support.”
Founded in 1974, the center helps survivors of sexual assault with counseling and victim assistance in the legal system across Northeast. They have about 80 employees, 43 of which are union eligible. – Mark Oprea
Cleveland City Council Considering Laws to Regulate and Limit ShortTerm Rentals
The party at an Airbnb at 12404 Larchmere Boulevard got out of hand quickly.
It was July 6, 2024, and 200 people—mostly teenagers—were in attendance. Police were called. Guests were running into neighbors’ backyards. Businesses closed. A restarant close by had to tell its patio diners to move indoors.
What may be the worst-case scenario for a short-term rental was on the minds of every councilmember present at the Development, Planning & Sustainability Committee on Tuesday, when City Council weighed new laws meant to prevent Airbnbs and Vrbos from turning into nuisances for the entire block.
Nearly a year after Council began entertaining ways to weed out unruly short-term rental properties, the new law package relies heavily on ensuring all of them, whether they’re one-bedroom Airbnbs downtown or full-house Vrbos in West Park, are fully licensed by the city.
And with that license comes a whole bunch of new rules. Short-term rentals hosts or homeowners must send the city a plan outlining guest count, bedroom layout, designated parking, proof of tax payments, a certificate of occupancy and proof of liability insurance no less than $300,000. (And pay a $150 fee to go along with it.)
If you’re licensed? All listings must display a new license number. You can’t host more than two guests per bedroom for more than a month. And every listing must function effectively like an apartment—with smoke and carbon monoxide alarms, fire extinguishers and trash and recycling bins.
And no more parties that irk the neighbors.
“Excessive or unnecessary noise,” the ordinance shown Tuesday reads, “is prohibited at all times.”
The last time Cleveland scrutinized its laws for short-term rentals was shortly before the 2016 Republican National Convention, when tens of thousands of tourists paid to stay in short-term rentals across the city.
The goal, then, recalled Ward 3 Councilman Kerry McCormack, was to put regulations on the books that tried to weed out abusers of the properties they were staying at for a few days. The result was vague legal language trying to ensure, it reads, “limited lodging will not be a detriment to the character and livability of the surrounding residential neighborhood.”
“What we have found is that it is completely unenforceable,” McCormack, who co-sponsored the legislation with Councilwoman Jenny Spencer, said on Tuesday. “The mechanics of the ordinance. The legal components of the ordinance. It has become extremely difficult to enforce the law pertaining to short-term rentals.”
Rachel Scalish, City Council’s special legal counsel, told the committee that the legal language she and others worked on for the past year was necessary.
“Right now, we have short-term rentals kind of everywhere, but there’s nothing regulating them,” Scalish said. “There’s no licensing process at all. We really would like to regulate them—and know where they are.”
There are anywhere from 900 to 1,500 short-term rentals hosting guests at any given time in Cleveland, from West Park to Shaker Square. Your average Airbnb costs $123 a night, according to BNBCalc, a short-term rental metrics service.
And that average dangles profits for hosts and property owners way above what they would make listing the same two-bedroom as a monthly rental. (About $3,800 in revenue per month on average.) Even with the city’s three percent hotel tax.
Such huge economic incentive, coupled with the relative ease of attracting guests via an app, has changed Cleveland’s neighborhoods for the worse, Spencer said. Apartments originally meant for families with jobs in the city are otherwise advertised for out-of-town tourists with no actual care for the block they’re staying on.
“I’m not into that,” Spencer said. “I want more neighbors. I want tight-knit communities. I want neighbors who support and build community together.” If the legislation is made into law, no Cleveland block can be more than 15 percent short-term rentals. Hosts can apply for a variance with the Board of Zoning Appeals, but those cases are bound to take months and be rarely okayed.
City Council as a whole has yet to set a date for its possible passing. – Mark Oprea
FEATURE
BACK TO THE MARCH
With LGBTQ Ohioans’ rights under assault by Trump and the statehouse, Cleveland Pride supporters are set to resurrect the event’s political roots
By Mark Oprea
IT’S SOMEWHAT TRICKY to pinpoint when Cleveland’s first Pride celebration occurred –sources hint at 1972 or 1973 –but it’s not difficult to discern the why. There were the riots at the Stonewall Inn in New York City. Nixon had refused to include gay folks in federal anti-discrimination laws. Waves of demonstration were popping up around the country in response.
Locally, in September 1972, civil rights backers stood outside a gay bar on Euclid Avenue to lead a Gay Pride March to Public Square. Two hundred were invited; only about 40 came. 1975 wasn’t that much different. The Gay Education Awareness and Resources center invited thousands to a Gay Pride Picnic at Edgewater in the face of public opposition: West Side bars refused to hang posters or keep brochures. (Others trashed them.) A partnering church received threatening calls to its hotline. Speakers at Cleveland State canceled last-minute. Still, 100 gathered on the beach, some doubling as makeshift security. They sang the protest anthem “We Shall Overcome.” They prayed. “All in all, however,” an article in GEAR read after, it was “a good step forward for the newly emerging political gay community.” A half century later, Pride backers, partici -
pants and allies seem to be back in a similar political arena. As previewed by the far-right policy playbook, Project 2025, President Donald Trump immediately began his second term leading the White House signing a suite of executive orders meant to either restrict or completely eliminate every single iota of governmental recognition— from grants to Harvard to words on federal IDs or forms—of anything involving diversity, equity and inclusion. They were policies that automatically seeped into the LGBTQ sphere. And policies that seem obsessed with so-called biology. Whether it be restoring the “biological reality of sex” on foreign visas or employee email signatures. Or slashing LGBTQ sections on .gov sites, erasing 11 Biden-era policy briefs, cutting $125 million in AIDS/HIV research, making it U.S. policy to “keep men out of women’s sports,” or closing all links to transgender healthcare, especially for minors. (“Identity-based confusion,” according to Trump’s order.) “This dangerous trend will be a stain on our nation’s history,” one January order, “Protecting Children From Chemical and
by
Photo by Daniel Lozada
Photo
Daniel Lozada
Surgical Mutilation,” reads. “And it must end.” Such political thought has also been found at Ohio Statehouse in what seems to be a heavier-than-usual year for anti-LGBTQ bills. Bills that could, if signed by Gov. DeWine, prevent preferred names or pronouns from being spoken at Ohio schools without a parent’s permission, ban the Pride flag on state grounds, and make it state policy to, as Ohio’s Budget Bill reads, “recognize two sexes, male and female.” “We are well aware that we are who this administration is targeting,” Phyllis Harris, the director of the LGBT Center for the past 13 years, told Scene recently from her office in Gordon Square. “We’re aware that our lives have been politicized by the executive orders.” As has been standard for the past decade (save for 2016, when there was no Pride in Cleveland), Harris and her team began prepping for Pride in the CLE in January, weeks before Trump sat down in the Oval Office to sign a handful of orders that would effectively eviscerate every single LGBTQ protection signed by President Biden. Harris knew what was coming. She had studied Project 2025 like a general under Sun Tzu. She sensed DEI offices, like at Case Western or the Cleveland Clinic, would shutter or be rolled back. She figured some of Pride’s usual corporate sponsors might back out, or, as would soon happen, decide to support Pride anonymously. (“A handful,” Harris said.) Months of planning told Harris to fashion June 7th as a kind of retaliatory retrospective: If they’re taking us back, well, so the hell are we. “Pride in the CLE doesn’t have a parade” this year, Harris said. “We have a march.” And that they will. After the 11 a.m. march from Public Square to the Malls, a day’s worth of entertainment mingles fittingly with an activist’s showcase on the Speak Out Stage. There will be Mexican food trucks, ice cream vendors, mobile healthcare units, a fully-ADA-accessible bathroom called the Momentum Refresh. And there will be Veranda L’Ni, Cleveland’s tallest drag queen and realtor by day,
marching from Public Square behind a banner reading “DRAG IS NOT A CRIME.”
L’Ni, who made national headlines in 2023 after hosting a drag show at a restaurant in Chardon despite a bomb threat, feels that, ironically enough, the Ohio Statehouse’s attempt to stifle and shut away drag is a helpful reminder. One that might’ve gotten lost amidst the bubble-blowing fun and the electric afterparties at Studio West 117. “Actually, I think we did lose something here,” L’Ni told Scene. “That Pride is meant to be a protest, not a party. And while we’ve surely gotten to that point, we’re back to the protest end of it. At least that’s what it feels like to me.” L’Ni’s anxiety isn’t unwarranted. Earlier this year, state representatives Josh Williams and Angela King co-sponsored a bill that would punish drag performers for violating Ohio obscenity laws the same way, and in the same category, as “topless dancers, go-go dancers, exotic dancers and strippers.” And that bill, the Indecent Exposure Modernization Act, could make some if not all public-facing drag acts—where kids could be present—potentially punishable, if convicted by the courts, with a fourth-degree felony. “No person, with knowledge of its character or conduct,” the bill reads, “shall recklessly engage in an adult cabaret performance in a location other than an adult cabaret.” In an interview with Scene, Williams defended his bill as simply an updating of Ohio’s current obscenity laws, which typically punish those for exhibitionism. Not, he urged Scene understand, a timely, all-out attack on Pride. “I go to the R&B Park Jam [in Toledo] all the time,” Williams said. “And guess what? If somebody started engaging in conduct that rose to the level of obscenity, they will be arrested.” “It’s either you want to be included in society, and held to the same standards, with the rights and obligations of every other adult,” he added. “Or you want to be treated special, based on your sexual preference or gender ideology—you can’t have it both ways.” Ken Schneck, the editor of the
12 NORTHEAST OHIO PRIDE EVENTS NOT TO MISS
Caliente: Cleveland Latine Pride Party Friday, May 30
10 p.m.
Vibe Bar & Patio, 11671 Lorain Ave.
Special guest performer Vermelha Noir, from RuPaul’s Drag Race Mexico Star, helps lead the entertainment at this monthly party that helps kick of Pride month with a Latin theme and celebration. Other performers include Agata Why, Ariyah Fuego, Big Top and Slavicon.
Pride Picnic and Chalk the Square Thursday, June 5
6 p.m. – 8 p.m.
Medina Square, 39 Public Square
Out Support invites all to gather in downtown Medina for cupcakes, treats and plenty of art. Nonprofits and other LGBTQ organizations will be on hand to provide information and support. Natalie Martin will provide the musical soundtrack to this family-friendly affair.
Pride in the CLE Saturday, June 7
11 a.m. – 6 p.m.
Mall B & C, 300 St. Clair Ave NE
The marquee event of Pride month in Northeast Ohio brings thousands together for a march to Public Square with speakers and entertainment to follow.
Pride Family Picnic
Sunday, June 14
1 p.m. – 4 p.m.
Kauffman Park, 15450 Detroit Ave.
Hosted by Kauffman Park Friends along with COLORS+ Youth Center and the Healthy Lakewood Foundation, this picnic welcomes friends, families and LGBTQ+ allies for a day of fun and solidarity. There will be music, games, entertainment and more including appearances by Sassy Sascha and DJ Maydayy.
BBH Pride Fest
Saturday, June 14
Noon
Broadview Heights City Campus & Amphitheater, 9543 Broadview Rd.
The third annual event, hosted at the Broadview Heights City Campus and Amphitheater, became a political talking point in the suburb in recent years, but those voicing opposition can’t stop the action. With live music, food vendors, crafts, games and entertainment, BBH Pride Fest welcomes all for a day of pride, celebration and community.
Mx. Juneteenth
Saturday, June 21
11 a.m. – 5 p.m.
Rock and Roll Hall of Fame, 1100 E 9th St.
The Black and Queer liberation celebration brings the action live to the Rock Hall on June 21 to dance, eat, learn, laugh, and live out loud. Marking five years of Black and Queer joy, five years of “radical freedom,” community takes center stage at this event.
Coventry Pride Block Party
Saturday, Jun 21
11 a.m. – 3 p.m.
Harvey Pekar Park, 2785 Euclid Heights Blvd.
The inaugural Coventry Pride Potluck Block Part welcomes all LGBTQIA+ neighbors and friends for a gathering to share food and support.
Stow-Munroe Falls Pride Cookout 2025 INAUGURAL PRIDE
Saturday, June 21
1 p.m. – 4 p.m.
Leona Farris Lodge, 5238 Young Rd.
As the Stow Collaboration Center for Change celebrates its fifth anniversary, the organization is partnering with the Stow-Munroe Falls Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion Initiative, the SMF LGBTQ Crew, and the Stow-Munroe Falls Democratic Club for a cookout to share food and fellowship. Drag queens, a selfie station, crafts and more fun will be in store.
PINK INK: Zygote’s Third Annual Queer Print + Zine Fair
Saturday, June 28
11 a.m. – 4 p.m.
Zygote Press. 1310 E. 30th St.
The “Harbinger” exhibit includes prints and print media exploring queer life and “soft moments.” Artists “offer insight to their world and the ordinary, genuine, significant act of taking up space. A refuge for quiet love, this exhibition focuses on that space - and how our environments shift and change around us, and us to them. It marks resilience and where we have always been and will continue to reside.”
SOGI Family Pride
Saturday, June 28
1 p.m. – 6 p.m.
Family Life Center, 16349 Chillicothe Rd. Geauga SOGI Family Pride will feature pride-themed vendors, food, resources, games, crafts and plenty of entertainment at the free, family-friendly event.
Black Pride White Party
Saturday, August 16
6 p.m. – 10 p.m.
4700 Lakeside Avenue
Celebrating the legacy of BlackOut Unliminted, Inc., guests are encouraged to dress in their finest white attire for food, drinks, music and plenty of dancing.
Akron Pride Festival & Equity March
Saturday, August 23
10 a.m. – 10 p.m.
Downtown Akron
The eighth annual Equity March wants attendees to show up, take a stand, and be heard as Akron marches for equality and equity for all.
Buckeye Flame, calls bullshit. “It could not be more clear that the super majority of state representatives, in the state where they live, are attempting to criminalize them,” he said. “Not just devalue them. But criminalize them based on subjective standards.” Schneck pointed to Mark King, Angela King’s husband, who had photos of him surface dressed as a woman in a church play, in 2018. “But Pride is ‘obscene’!” Schneck said. “Right? This over here is ‘art.’ But this over there is ‘obscene’?” Over at the LGBT Community Center in midMay, Harris walks around as team members make final preparations on Pride in the CLE from their decked-out cubicles. Upstairs, a group of gay men in the Rainbow Pioneers program vent about Trump’s slashing of HIV research. Politics are ever present. “You know what?” a man in his sixties told Scene, standing near the elevators. “My daughter voted for Trump. And her father’s gay. And her daughter needs an abortion. What do you make of that right there?” Downstairs,
Harris sits at her desk, juggling both the size of the June 7th march and the political ideology at the Statehouse that’s led to it. When read pieces of Williams and King’s bill, Harris laughs as only an activist at her age could laugh.
“As a Black lesbian feminist, there’s a lot about heteronormativity that I think is obscene,” she said. “You know what I’m saying?” She brought up the American event probably most studded with obscenity citations, New Orleans’ Mardi Gras. (Ten people were arrested on that charge last year.) “Like come on—what are we doing here?” Harris said. “I mean, we don’t have time for that nonsense. We’re worried about HIV medicines being taken away. Trans and non-binary youth are saying, ‘Why does everybody hate us?’” Harris cupped her hands under her chin. “We have to pay attention to policymakers and legislation and things like that,” she said. “But we are fighting for our lives.”
Photo by Daniel Lozada
GET OUT Everything to do in Cleveland for
WED 05/21
Fiddler on the Roof
Set in the Ukranian village of Anatevha, Fiddler on the Roof centers on Tevye, a poor milkman who struggles to support five unmarried daughters and a wife. His family troubles, however, become insignificant when the ruling regime turns against the Jews of Anatevka. The classic play comes to the Allen Theatre. Tonight’s performance takes place at 7:30. Performances continue through Sunday, May 25. 1407 Euclid Ave., 216-241-6000, playhousesquare.org.
Midnight Rental Presents Secret Movie Night
Hosted by Lenora from the internet hit-series Midnight Rental, this movie night features what it deems to be the best in VHS horror, thriller and campy classics. The event begins tonight at 8 at the Grog Shop in Cleveland Heights, and the club will feature a special movie night menu for the event.
2785 Euclid Heights Blvd., Cleveland Heights, 216-321-5588, grogshop.gs.
Scott Thompson Is Buddy Cole Scott Thompson from the Kids in the Hall portrays his most famous
character, lounge lizard Buddy Cole, in this one-man show at the Hanna Theatre. The performance begins at 8 p.m. 2067 East 14th St., 216-241-6000, playhousesquare.org.
THU 05/22
Janáček’s Jenůfa
The Cleveland Orchestra and the Cleveland Orchestra Chorus present this iteration of the opera about “forbidden love, desperation and reconciliation,” as it’s put in a press release. Tonight’s performance begins at 7. 11001 Euclid Ave., 216-231-1111, clevelandorchestra.com.
FRI 05/23
Berea’s National Rib Cook-Off & Beer Fest
At this annual event that takes place today through Monday at the Cuyahoga County Fairgrounds, ten rib teams from all over the country will compete in hopes of winning one of three major awards. Family activities include a rock-climbing wall a “super slide” and swings. Find hours as well as a schedule of musical performances on the
website. 19201 East Bagley Rd., Middleburg Heights, 440- 243-0090, berearib.com.
Ryan Hamilton
Recent appearances on The Late Show with Stephen Colbert, Conan and an opening spot for Jerry Seinfeld have helped comedian Ryan Hamilton. The good-natured comic who grew up in rural Idaho comes to the Hilarities tonight and tomorrow night at 6:30 and 9:15. 2035 East Fourth St., 216-241-7425, pickwickandfrolic.com.
Vox Humana
At 7:30 tonight and at 8 tomorrow night at Mandel Concert Hall, the Cleveland Orchestra delivers a special program curated by conductor Franz Welser-Möst. French soprano Sarah Aristidou will perform as well. 11001 Euclid Ave., 216-231-1111, clevelandorchestra.com.
SAT 05/24
A Fundraising Canine Cookout
The Beachland Ballroom hosts this special event that will raise money for Axel’s K9 Rescue. It begins at 12:30 p.m. and goes until 5 p.m. Dogs on corrective collars are welcome.
15711 Waterloo Rd., 216-383-1124, beachlandballroom.com.
SUN 05/25
Jokes on You
Inspired by crowd work clinicians like Dave Attell, Ian Bagg, and Big Jay Oakerson, Jokes On You makes the audience the center of the show by “pushing comics to avoid prepared material or written jokes and instead focus on organic interaction with the audience,” as it’s put in a press release about this event, which takes place tonight at 7 at Hilarities. John Bruton and Jimmie Graham host the event. 2035 East Fourth St., 216-241-7425, pickwickandfrolic.com.
MON 05/26
Guardians vs. Los Angeles Dodgers
The reigning World Champs come to Progressive Field for the start of a three-game series. It’s the Dodgers’ one-and-only regular season visit to Progressive Field. The big-budget team is stocked with superstars like Shohei Ohtani, Mookie Betts, Tyler Glasnow and Freddie Freeman. First pitch is at 6:10 p.m.
Berea’s National Rib Cook-Off & Beer Fest returns to the Cuyahoga County Fairgrounds. See: Friday, May 23. | Courtesy of All Media Design Group
2401 Ontario St., 216-420-4487, mlb. com/guardians.
TUE 05/27
Food Truck Tuesday
This weekly event that takes place from 11:30 a.m. to 1:30 p.m. at Public Square (Rockwell and Ontario) will feature live music and some of the city’s best food trucks. It’s free, but the food will cost you. downtowncleveland.com.
WED 05/28
Shitshow Karaoke
Local rapper/promoter Dirty Jones and Scene’s own Manny Wallace host Shit Show Karaoke, a weekly event at the B-Side Liquor Lounge wherein patrons choose from “an unlimited selection of jams from hip-hop to hard rock,” and are encouraged to “be as bad as you want.” Fueled by drink and shot specials, it all goes down tonight at 10 p.m. Admission is free. 2785 Euclid Heights Blvd., Cleveland Heights, 216-932-1966, bsideliquorlounge.com.
THU 05/29
The Shrouds
A prominent businessman invents a device that enables the living to monitor their dearly departed in their “shrouds” in this film from veteran writer-director David Cronenberg (The Fly). It screens at 8:45 p.m. at the Cleveland Institute of Art Cinematheque. 11610 Euclid Ave., 216-421-7450, cia.edu.
FRI 05/30
Guardians vs. Los Angeles Angels
The Guardians go up against a Los Angeles Angels team that started the season strong but have since faltered. Tonight’s game begins at 7:10 at Progressive Field. The series concludes on Sunday with a day game.
2401 Ontario St., 216-420-4487, mlb. com/guardians.
SAT 05/31
Decades of Delight
Tonight at 7:30 at Mandel Concert Hall, the Cleveland Pops Orchestra plays music by the likes of Neil Diamond, Simon & Garfunkel, Carole King, Henry Mancini and Burt Bacharach. The night ends with a salute to the armed forces and first
responders. 11001 Euclid Ave., 216-231-1111, clevelandorchestra.com.
Thunder from Down Under
The press release promoting a recent appearance by the group of burly hunks who call themselves the Thunder from Down Under boasts that they’ll provide “the perfect girls’ night outback,” a reference to their Aussie heritage. Expect “seductive dance routines, cheeky humor and boy-next-door charm” from these topless dancers. The group performs tonight at 7:30 at MGM Northfield Park.
10705 Northfield Rd., Northfield, 330908-7793, mgmnorthfieldpark.mgmresorts.com/en.html.
SUN 06/01
The Sealed Soil
In this Iranian movie that has never been seen in Iran, a young woman is caught between the traditional values of her small village and her own yearnings for independence and individuality. Filmed in 1977, the film was smuggled out of Iran by the director in a false-bottomed suitcase and taken to the U.S., where it was completed. It screens at 2 p.m. at the Cleveland Institute of Art Cinematheque. 11610 Euclid Ave., 216-421-7450, cia. edu.
MON 06/02
Memorial Monday
Every Monday from now through Sept. 30, Fort Huntington Park hosts food tracks and live music between 11:30 a.m. and 1:30 p.m. for this special event. Admission is free, but the food will cost you. West 3rd St. and West Lakeside Ave., downtowncleveland.com.
TUE 06/03
Lyrical Rhythms Open Mic and Chill
This long-running open mic night at the B Side in Cleveland Heights allows some of the city’s best rappers and poets to strut their stuff. The event begins at 8 with a comedy session dubbed 2 Drinks & a Joke with host Ant Morrow. The open mic performances begin at 10 p.m. 2785 Euclid Heights Blvd., Cleveland Heights, 216-932-1966, bsideliquorlounge.com.
BLASTING OFF
New private equity owner of Dave’s Cosmic Subs promises a return to quality and dozens of new local, regional locations
By Douglas Trattner
DAVE LOMBARDY OPENED
the first Dave’s Cosmic Subs shop in Chagrin Falls in 1997. Since its inception, the brand has expanded to about 20 locations thanks to various franchise deals, but it never blew up the way Lombardy envisioned. For the past decade or so, the number of shops has remained relatively constant, with new ones occasionally popping up and underperforming shops closing their doors.
If new owner Paul Sidhu has his way, Dave’s Cosmic Subs will more than double its store count in the next three years while increasing visits, sales and satisfaction at existing shops.
Sidhu, President and CEO of Shaker Heights-based Sidhu Realty Capital, purchased his first Dave’s franchise in 2017, when he opened a shop in downtown Oberlin. In 2022, Sidhu Realty Capital bought
the entire company from founders Dave and Maryann Lombardy citing great brand recognition, product differentiation and growth potential.
“Everyone knows about Dave’s in the Cleveland area – that nostalgic craving for the food,” says Sidhu. “But having said that it also was very dated, the concept, in terms of the technology, restaurant equipment, point of sale systems, the design, the website, the online ordering platform, not having a mobile app. So there was a lot of opportunity.”
In advance of major expansion, Sidhu and his partners have been laying a solid foundation. Already they have rolled out a redesigned logo, installed new POS systems, launched a new website with online ordering and released a mobile app, which might be the ripest piece of low-hanging fruit of them all.
“When we get to know our customer, then we can start targeting them and offering promotions to get them back in the store faster, more frequently – all the things that make a huge difference in growing sales,” explains Sidhu.
When new ownership – especially a private equity firm – takes over a beloved local brand like Dave’s Cosmic Subs, the natural assumption is that quality will suffer at the hands of cost-cutting measures. Sidhu says that since taking over, the opposite has been true.
“I can tell you definitively that the food has gotten better,” he states.
The menu, which had crept up to include more than 30 different subs, has been trimmed to 22. At the same time, the company – in collaboration with chefs – has introduced seasonal LTOs (limited-time offerings), the most successful of which land on the regular menu. New vegan and gluten-free options have been added as well.
“But our top-five subs have been the same top-five subs they have been historically,” says Sidhu, rattling off a list that includes Original, Meatball, Crazy, Peacesteak and Turkey.
Modernized kitchen equipment is increasing both efficiency and quality, he adds, starting with the larger, crispier European-style baguettes that are baked in house.
When it comes to décor, a new “streamlined” look and feel will gradually replace the groovy – and legally problematic – use of celebrities’ likenesses with a more generic, less-cluttered interior.
“We have to think about how fast we can get these up, the availability of various materials, and the legality,” Sidhu explains. “But Chagrin Falls won’t change; call it the Museum of Dave’s.”
Also in advance of imminent expansion, the company has been doing a little house-cleaning. Underperforming shops like Ohio City and Coventry were closed to help boost neighboring locations like downtown Cleveland and University Heights. Going forward, the focus will be on untapped markets.
“We have a high level of concen-
tration of stores all within a stone’s throw of each other, so our idea is to spread out into new markets,” he says.
In addition to a new store in Fairview Park, which will open this summer, Dave’s has plans to expand into Pittsburgh, Cincinnati, Toledo, Nashville and more. These will be a combination of franchises and company-owned stores, Sidhu says.
“We’re going to put our money where our mouth,” he says. “We’re investing alongside our franchise partners. We’re trying to get to 50 stores within three years – and we’re on track to hit that and probably even exceed it.”
The assumption might be that the farther one travels from Chagrin Falls, the less familiar one would be of Dave’s Cosmic Subs. And while that’s true to some extent, it’s not an impediment to success, argues Sidhu.
“You know it’s crazy. In some of these locations, like Toledo, there are a significant number of people who’ve been to the University Heights and Chagrin Falls locations,” he says. “Dave’s is known as a niche concept – and that’s part of the appeal. It’s not generic. It’s not going to be the cheapest sub sandwich you’re going to get. But it is going to be the best sub sandwich you’re going to get.”
Dave’s Cosmic Subs davescosmicsubs.com
dtrattner@clevescene.com t@dougtrattner
Courtesy Photo
BITES
Ricky Smith’s Something Good Social Kitchen now open in Playhouse Square
By Douglas Trattner
COMPULSIVE KINDNESS
creator Ricky Smith has unveiled his latest project — Something Good Social Kitchen, a casual walk-up food stand, which opened earlier this week.
The operation has reactivated the kiosk in Playhouse Square Plaza last used for Dynomite Burgers. Smith consulted on the concept and menu with his friend and mentor Michael Symon.
“Everything we do is Cleveland based,” says Smith, listing local providers like Cleveland Kitchen, POP Mustard, Cleveland Ketchup, Orlando Bakery and others.
The menu features all-beef hot dogs, chopped cheese-style burgers and high-end seasonal salads. Customers can build their own dogs or order one the predesigned creations such as “The Hug,” which features POP Mustard, BBQ sauce, onion straws and bacon. The loose-meat burgers are a riff on chopped-cheese sandwiches.
Also on the streamlined menu are loaded fries and beverages.
Like all of Smith’s Random Acts of Kindness (R.A.K.E) endeavors, this one is altruistic in nature. For every meal sold, the non-profit donates one meal to people in need or those who deserve it, such as front-line workers, school teachers or unwell children.
Smith said it bothered him to see that stand in the heart of the city vacant for so long.
“I wanted to activate that plaza more than I wanted to do the food,” he explains.
In addition to the food, he intends to host or invite events like silent discos, pop-ups and other activities that bring more energy to the area.
“Not to sound cheesy, but to me music and food and kindness are universal languages – and I always just love serving people,” Smith adds.
Smith states that Something Good Social Kitchen is more than a
season-long residency; he intends to operate year-round by adjusting the menu seasonally.
Something Good is just the latest addition to Playhouse Square, which has been working “Beyond the Stage” to improve all aspects of live-work-play district. In addition to the lovingly restored theaters and top-notch performance calendar, the stewards of the nationally recognized arts district have been hard at work to elevate the hospitality offerings in the area.
In the last year or so, the district has gained The Friars’ Table, Gochujang, The Brasserie, The Bulkley Bar, Brel’s and others into the mix. Soon, Ben & Jerry’s Scoop Shop will serve ice cream in the Hanna Building and Encore will offer cocktails in an intimate, upscale setting located on the ground floor of The Lumen.
“It is a brilliant time to be at the Playhouse Square District — whether you are coming to see a show on one of our stages, living in the district or working at one of the many businesses in our neighborhood,” says Craig Hassall, Playhouse Square President & CEO. “With the addition of these new venues, we’ve now welcomed a total of seven new dining establishments over the past year, creating an even greater animated environment for both visitors and downtown works, residents and visitors.”
Fidelity Hotel Brings on Dan Young as Executive Chef
The last time I saw chef Daniel Young, he was manning the livefire kitchen at the wonderful – and James Beard Award-nominated – Portland, Maine restaurant
Fore Street. Prior to that, it was at Michael Symon restaurants such as Lolita and Mabel’s BBQ.
After years on the road, the Cleveland native has returned home to join the culinary team at the newly minted Fidelity Hotel (1940 East 6th St., 440-568-3200), the 97-room boutique hotel that opened downtown this past winter. Young has replaced opening chef Eddie Zalar.
“We are thrilled to welcome chef Young back home to Cleveland,” says hotel GM Eric Conrad. “As a native, he has shown tremendous enthusiasm for the property’s opening and where he can take our culinary program, so we know he will instill a sense of belonging and excitement into the kitchen. His expertise, passion for the destination, and infectious personality will generate momentum for our culinary team, to raise the bar on the exceptional dining experiences we provide for our guests and locals.”
As executive chef, Young will oversee all culinary at the hotel, not the least of which is the property’s signature restaurant Club Room. Already he has put his stamp on the menus, ingredients and execution therein. Look for new lunch and brunch offerings at Club Room, including the Club Room Club with smoked turkey, bacon, lettuce, tomato and Duke’s mayonnaise and the Chicken Schnitzel with roasted beet mustard, fennel, pickled onion and frisee.
After working for Symon at Lolita and Mabel’s BBQ locations both in Cleveland and Las Vegas, Young went on to work at Fore Street in Portland. After his stint there, the chef traveled out west to serve as executive chef of Halcyon Hotel in Denver.
“I’m beyond excited to have joined the Fidelity team, and to be
immersing myself back into the Cleveland food scene,” says Young. “Myself and the rest of the team here are thrilled to be a part of it, and are looking forward to the future for both the city and Club Room.”
Tony’s Burger Shop to Join New Erie + Vine in Willoughby
Erie + Vine (4027 Erie St.), a new bar in Willoughby that is replacing the short-lived Dukes n’ Boots, is on pace to open the first week in June. When it does, chef Anthony Zappola will unveil the second location of his popular Tony’s Burger Shop concept that opened this past winter at Van Aken District.
Zappola says that he had worked with the building owners years ago at Ballantine in the same city. He describes the arrangement as mutually beneficial, with him being the food operator and his new partners running the bar side of things.
Dante Boccuzzi opened Dukes ‘n Boots in 2023, but it closed last summer after little more than a year. The bar has undergone a full transformation, says Zappola, including new interior design, kitchen equipment and other features.
Like the original in Shaker Heights, Tony’s Burger Shop at Erie + Vine will offer single and double smash burgers, specialty burgers, grilled cheese sandwiches, fried chicken tenders, fries and onion rings. Everything is made with Zappola’s chef-driven attention to detail.
Zappola added that he plans to further expand his Tony’s concept in the near future.
dtrattner@clevescene.com
t@dougtrattner
Photo by Mark Oprea
MUSIC
A PERFECT PAIRING
Singer Maynard James Keenan
curated the tripleband bill coming to Blossom
By Jeff Niesel
A MODERN-DAY RENAISSANCE Man, Tool/A Perfect Circle/ Puscifer singer Maynard James Keenan, a Ravenna native, represents a textbook definition of the term. The guy not only fronts some of hard/progressive rock’s best bands, but he also runs a vinyl café as well as a vineyard, restaurant and tasting room located in the rather remote Verde Valley in Western Arizona.
At 8 p.m. on Sunday, May 25, Keenan brings Sessanta, an adventurous tour featuring Puscifer, Primus and A Perfect Circle, to Blossom. It’s an extension of last year’s limited number of shows that the groups played to mark Keenan’s 60th birthday.
“I’m just trying to catch up with everything,” says Keenan via phone from his Verde Valley home. “I have two weeks to do everything I need to do in the café and the winery. I’m just trying to get it done. It’s daunting. You have this beast that needs to be fed and run, so it’s a daily stress, but it’s worth it knowing what people experience when they walk away from the places. It’s definitely worth the effort, but it takes a lot of energy.”
One solid set that clocks in around three hours in total, the Sessanta show features multiple mini sets that morph into the next band’s set, with the groups shifting members as the night goes on (so you might get Keenan singing with singer-bassist Les Claypool when Primus plays and Claypool playing bass with APC).
When conceiving of the tour last year, Keenan says he thought about the guys in Primus, an altrock/jam band he admires, and figured they would mesh well with his Puscifer and A Perfect Circle bandmates.
“[Over the years,] I’ve watched how [singer-bassist] Les [Claypool] and [guitarist] [Larry] ‘Lar’ [LaLonde] navigate other bands,” he says. “They can seamlessly work with other people on stage. Les also has his jam band project. The personalities are really what it comes down to. It seemed like it was worth a try. And as we predicted, it was great.”
The tour announcement video shows everyone standing around Keenan’s grave and Keenan crawling up from the dirt to proclaim he’s not dead yet.
“It was fun until I was supposed to be under the soil, and they forgot to put a battery in the camera,” he says dryly when asked about filming the clip. “We had to start over, and I had to re-bury myself. That’s incredibly terrifying.”
To mark the tour, the groups also released an EP featuring new tunes from all bands. “Kindred,” A Perfect Circle’s contribution, features somber vocals and pummeling drums as it references a death in the family. Puscifer’s “No Angel” benefits from ricocheting guitar riffs and constipated vocals, and Primus’s “Pablo’s Hippos” comes off as particularly proggy with its thick bass riffs and noodling guitars.
“The whole EP came about when I was messing around with different riffs and ideas; they originated on my laptop during morning coffee,” says Keenan.
Started on a whim some 20 years ago, Puscifer has become a serious side project for Keenan even if it doesn’t draw the same size of an audience as A Perfect Circle and Tool, both of which are arena rock acts.
“It has evolutionary potential,” Keenan says of Puscifer. “Just the way we approach everything is very focused play for lack of a better explanation. The way [guitarist] Mat [Mitchell] works and I work and [singer] Carina [Round] works dovetails. We’re currently working on a new album. Watching it come together is really inspirational as I can see each piece as it’s been added or subtracted. We’re not sitting in a studio together, so it’s fun to get an update and hear what someone has done, and you can react.”
Keenan says he organically decides which project to devote his attention to.
“It kind of presents itself,” he says. “It just depends on where each band is at with the writing and touring. Did we just play that place last year? Should be go back
this year? It’s basic logistics.”
The last Puscifer record came out in 2020, so it’s due for a new release. Keenan says the forthcoming album will center on a theme, but he’s not willing to reveal what it is just yet. The tour will undoubtedly exploit the album’s concept.
“We did the trailer tour, and in 2015, we had the Luchadores ring in the middle of the stage. They were our opening band,” he says. “They did a match and then were on stage with us during the show while we were doing songs.”
Keenan has left a lasting legacy with all of his bands, especially Tool, which has yet to be inducted into the Rock Hall even though the group is eligible. Keenan says he doesn’t lose sleep wondering if the band will ever get the nod, but he also says he’s not so anti-establishment that he wouldn’t show up for the band’s induction.
“To be honored like that would be nice,” he says. “I was at Ozzy [Osbourne’s induction], so I guess I should show up for my own, though I’m from Ohio, so I do have the love/hate thing going on.”
SESSANTA V 2.0: PRIMUS, PUSCIFER & A PERFECT CIRCLE, 8 P.M., SUNDAY, MAY 25. BLOSSOM MUSIC CENTER, 1145 W. STEELS CORNER RD., CUYAHOGA FALLS., 330-920-8040. TICKETS: $51+, LIVENATION.COM.
LIVEWIRE Real music in the real world
THU 05/22
Lettuce
The psychedelic funk band out of Boston has been a going concern since forming in 1992. The current tour supports 2022’s studio effort Unify as well as 2023’s live effort, Live in Amsterdam. The group plays at 7 p.m. at Globe Iron. 2320 Center St., globeironcle.com.
FRI 05/23
Jason Aldean
The country singer-songwriter out of Macon, GA returns to Blossom. His latest album, Highway Desperado, finds him co-writing three of the tunes and features the divisive “Try That in a Small Town.” The show begins at 7:30 p.m. Nate Smith, RaeLynn and Dee Jay Silver open. 1145 W. Steels Corners Rd., Cuyahoga Falls, 216-231-1111, livenation.com.
Zack Fox
This guy does a bit of everything. A comedian, rapper, actor, illustrator and DJ, he’s made appearances on YouTube shows such as The Cave and released his debut album, Shut the Fuck Up Talking to Me, in 2021. He delivers a DJ set at 7 p.m. at Globe Iron. 2320 Center St., globeironcle.com.
SAT 05/24
October London
The singer-songwriter brings his tour in support of his new album, October Nights, to Jacobs Pavilion. He artfully blends R&B with elements of funk, blues, and soul on slow jams such as “Slander My Name” and the percussion-driven “Touch on Me.” Tamar Braxton and Ro James open. Doors open at 7 p.m. 2014 Sycamore St., 216-861-4080, jacobspavilion.com.
Reggae Fest Cleveland
Today’s performers at this annual two-day event include Lake Erie, the Flex Crew, JR Blessington, Mighty Mystic and Roots of Creation. Tomorrow, Jah Messengers, the Ark Band, Shākē Ground Band, Carlos Jones and Pato Banton will perform. Food trucks will be on hand as well. The concert takes place at Voinovich Park. reggaefestcleveland.com.
SUN 05/25
Sessanta V 2.0: Primus, Puscifer, A Perfect Circle Tool/A Perfect Circle/Puscifer singer
that features Primus, Puscifer and A Perfect Circle playing one continuous set. Clocking in around three hours in total, the Sessanta show features multiple mini sets that morph into the next band’s set, with the groups shifting members as the night goes on (so you might get Keenan singing with singer-bassist Les Claypool when Primus plays, and Claypool playing bass with APC). The concert begins at 8 p.m. at Blossom. 1145 W. Steels Corners Rd., Cuyahoga Falls, 216-231-1111, livenation.com.
Tennis
The indie band that just released Neutral Poetry: First Recordings, Unreleased Demos 2009-2010, a new EP of previously unheard tracks from the very beginning of its career, performs at 7 p.m. at Globe Iron. The group draws from rock and synth-pop; it has said this tour will be its last. 2320 Center St., globeironcle.com.
WED 05/28
AC/DC — Power Up Tour 2025
These Rock Hall Inductees from the Land Down Under just won’t quit even though most members are now at least 70. The hard rock group that practically defined the genre comes to town as part of a tour celebrating the 2020 album, Power Up. The concert begins tonight at 7 Huntington Bank Field. A portion of the concert proceeds benefit the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame’s education programs and resources. 100 Alfred Lerner Way, livenation.com.
FRI 05/30
Newly inducted into the Rock Hall, the Dave Matthews Band takes a victory lap with this summer tour that brings it back to Blossom. At a festival date earlier this year, it played hits such as “What Would You Say” and “So Much to Say” along with covers of tunes by Peter Gabriel and Bob Dylan. The concert begins at 7:30 p.m. 1145 W. Steels Corners Rd., Cuyahoga Falls, 216-231-1111, livenation.com.
SAT 05/31
Fayrewether
In the ‘70s and ‘80s, Paul Fayrewether fronted the Cleveland-based band Fayrewether, and the band became known for its renditions of songs by Genesis and Alex Harvey. At the height of the band’s popularity, it filled rooms all over the region from Ohio, New York, Indiana, Michigan, Illinois, Wisconsin, Minnesota and Pennsylvania. Fayrewether, who currently lives in the suburbs and doesn’t play live often, brings his group known for its theatrical performances back to House of Blues. Doors open at 7 p.m. 308 Euclid Ave., 216-523-2583, houseofblues.com.
SUN 06/01
Wallows
The indie rock act out of Los Angeles draws from folk, post-punk, psychedelia, and electronic music on its new album, More. Following this North America headline run, the group will support My Chemical Romance over two nights at Los Angeles’s Dodger Stadium, and then make stops at Lollapalooza and Outside Lands before heading to Europe and the United
Kingdom. It performs at 6:30 p.m. at Jacobs Pavilion. Porches open the show. 2014 Sycamore St., 216-861-4080, jacobspavilion.com.
MON 06/02
Panchiko
This band that broke up in the late 1990s reunited just a few years ago after the discovery of its demo CD turned it into an internet sensation. In 2016, someone posted a photo of a demo CD they’d discovered in an Oxfam charity store in Nottingham, UK. The listener uploaded the ripped audio to file-sharing sites, and the music caught on. The band has been active ever since. With new music in the works, the group comes to Globe Iron tonight at 6. Model/Acrtiz opens. 2320 Center St., globeironcle.com.
TUE 06/03
Pierce the Veil: I Can’t Hear You World Tour
The emo group that formed nearly 20 years ago in San Diego has never been more popular than it is now. The success of its last album, 2023’s The Jaws of Life, which featured the crossover hit “Emergency Contact,” has brought the band’s music to the masses. The group brings its world tour to Blossom tonight. Sleeping with Sirens and Beach Weather open. The concert begins at 7.
1145 W. Steels Corners Rd., Cuyahoga Falls, 216-231-1111, livenation.com.
Maynard James Keenan curated this show
Dave Matthews Band
AC/DC brings its stadium tour to Huntington Bank Field. See: Wednesday, May 28.|Courtesy of Live Nation
SAVAGE LOVE
HURT PEOPLE
By Dan Savage
I’m a 33-year-old gay man in a big city. I am currently in a fivemonth relationship with a wonderful, sweet man who loves me very much. I love him too. Prior to this I was in a throuple for three years. That relationship was toxic. I was the new addition to the throuple, and I was more in love with one of them. There were a lot of jealousy issues, and a lot of hurt that took me a long time to get over when I finally moved on. Truthfully, even when that relationship ended, I was still very much in love with my main partner from that throuple. Our sexual chemistry was unlike anything else, and the deep passion we have for each other was unmatched. But we did break up. And I spent a lot of time healing. And now I met this wonderful man.
My main ex from the throuple — the one I loved most — just reached out to let me know that he and his other partner broke up and he wants me back. All of a sudden, my ex is telling me how much he loves me, how much he wants me, and how he wants to be my only partner — all of the things I would’ve killed to hear him say a year ago. I now find myself torn between my new boyfriend, who has done nothing wrong, and my ex, a man I love so much and have this INCREDIBLE sexual chemistry with but who really hurt me. It should be noted that I am incredibly submissive in bed, and although my new partner tries to be dominant, it doesn’t come naturally to him. My ex was fantastic in that role. And if I’m being honest, I have to admit that that kind of sexual play is something I need in a relationship. I’m torn and don’t know what to do. I don’t want to hurt anyone, but find myself in the impossible position of choosing between two people I care deeply about. Help!
Tormented Over X In Chicago
“When the gods wish to punish us, they answer our prayers.” — Oscar Wilde
You spent three years in a throuple that turned toxic — or maybe was toxic from the start — and when it ended, all you wanted was for the guy you truly loved to choose you… and he didn’t. So, you did what people are supposed to do when a bad relationship ends:
you moved out, you moved on, you met someone else. And now the relationship gods have decided to fuck with you: the man you wanted is single and now he wants you and only you — so, your prayers have been answered, but a year too late.
Let’s rewind.
You joined a couple as a third — as their third — but you weren’t a perfectly balanced third. You were more into one than the other, TOXIC, which you most likely realized going in. That happens in lots of relationships; even in couples, one partner is often more invested/besotted/committed than the other. But an imbalance like that hits a little different — it’s more destabilizing — in a triad. If the partner you weren’t into could tell you were only tolerating him while not-so-subtly fantasizing about peeling off his boyfriend… that’s not just an awkward vibe or a price-ofadmission power imbalance a person can learn to tolerate. That’s an existential threat. Whether the other guy — the guy your dream man just dumped — was always the problem or he became a problem when he sensed not just what you wanted, TOXIC, but what his original partner also wanted… it’s easy to understand why he was unhappy. It’s a situation that could bring out the worst in anybody — you included.
Anyway!
Your throuple ended! You did the work! You found someone new! Someone kind! Someone who loves you! Someone you love… kinda… but not as much as you love the man who just walked back into your life.
As much as it pains me to say this — because the only person we know for sure is blameless in all this is the lovely man you’ve been seeing for the last six months — you should dump the new guy. You’re already comparing the new guy to your ex… and the new can’t meet your needs the same way your ex did… which means you’re going to be thinking about your ex each and every time he tries and fails. And the longer you go on measuring the meh sex you have with your current boyfriend against the insanely hot sex you had with your ex, TOXIC, the more you’re going to miss your ex and find yourself fantasizing about what might’ve been.
So, while staying with the nice guy sounds like the nice thing to do — while it sounds like the decent thing to do — staying with someone to avoid hurting their feelings only sets them up for more hurt down the road. But while you won’t be able to avoid hurting your current boyfriend’s feelings, TOXIC, you can
avoid wasting his time by ending things cleanly and soon. But don’t move right back in — or pick up right where you left off — with your ex. Date him. Take it slow. You may have fantasized about being with your ex on his own, TOXIC, but you’ve never known him on his own.
P.S. You’re faced with a choice between two men you love — your ex from that disastrous throuple and the man you’ve been seeing for six months — and you’re hesitating, in much the same way your ex faced a choice between you and his original partner and hesitated.
My dad is a dick. He’s been married to my mom for a long time. They have nine kids. I’m the eldest at 24, and the youngest is nine. My mom is a stay-at-home parent who has devoted her life to raising us kids and supporting our father. Lately, my dad has started disappearing. He leaves on solo international trips with no notice, sometimes without telling my mom where he’s going or how long he’ll be gone. She wakes up alone and heartbroken. He recently told her he’d be “offline for three days” while “traveling via China.” She was beside herself — my father has health issues, and he gave her no way to contact him. When I checked his iPad, I not only found his location, but evidence of years of affairs. I told one of my sisters, only to discover she and two of my other siblings already know. Worse, he’s been blackmailing and bribing them into silence. He’s spent years preparing for the fallout if he’s ever discovered. If my mom leaves him, she’ll be left with nothing. He’s made sure of that. I hate what he’s done to us. I hate that he’s a coward who won’t be honest with my mom. I hate how he’s damaged my siblings. But I also don’t want to destroy my mom’s life and what little stability my younger siblings still have. I feel trapped between blowing it all up and protecting the people I love. What the hell do I do?
Despicable And Deceitful Asshole
Your dad is a dick with an expiration date — the health issues he’s neglecting — and here’s hoping the stress of leading a double life moves his expiration date forward. But besides rooting for the massive coronary your dad deserves, DADA, it doesn’t sound like you have other good options.
Telling your mom means blowing up her life — and the lives of your younger siblings — but staying silent, as some of your siblings have opted to do, will make you feel like
you’re enabling a monster. And it’s not just short-term fallout you have to worry about: when (not if) your mom finds out what’s been going on, she may be even more devastated to learn that the people she loves most in this world — her own children — knew what her husband was doing and didn’t come to her. For many, the betrayal of infidelity is made worse by the realization that they were the last to know…. and if your mom is still dependent on your father when this all comes out, there’s a non-zero chance she could direct anger at you and your siblings that should’ve been directed at your father.
So, when that day comes — when the day comes that your mom finds out on her own, from you, or from someone else — you’re gonna wanna be able to point to concrete things you were doing to help mom prepare for life after dad. If I were you, I would encourage mom to get a parttime job — your youngest sibling is nine, not an infant — and nudge her to get her own bank account and her own credit card, so she can start creating her own credit history. Then if she projects her anger onto you when the shit hits the fan (or even if she doesn’t), DADA, you’ll be able to look your mom in the eye and say, “We didn’t feel like we could tell you when we found out — we weren’t sure you would want to know — but we were trying to protect you.”
And the next time dad is “traveling in China,” DADA, get on his iPad and gather up all the evidence you can: download incriminating emails, take screenshots of bank statements, print out anything that could document your dad’s financial schemes, etc. Then guilt your siblings into using the money your dad paid them to hire an experienced divorce attorney and a forensic accountant to look through what you manage to find. If it turns out your dad was bluffing — if your mom isn’t as screwed as your dad claims — then it’ll be dad’s life that gets blown up and mom who gets everything.
Got problems? Yes, you do! Email your question for the column to mailbox@savage.love!
Or record your question for the Savage Lovecast at savage.love/ askdan!
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