On Target 2015

Gold Arrow Camp 2015

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M A G A Z I N E

5 REASONS Great Parents Send their Kids To Camp

Christine Carter talks about The Key to Happiness

F O R

C A M P

F A M I L I E S

RICHARD LOUV on “The Natural Gifts of Camp” IMAGINE YOUR CHILD IN THE FUTURE WITH TINA PAYNE BRYSON, PhD PLUS an Excerpt from Madeline Levine’s TEACH YOUR CHILDREN WELL

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Letter from the Directors Dear GAC Friends, Welcome to the 2015 edition of On Target, our magazine for camp families. We strive to not only provide our campers with memorable, happy, and life-changing camp experiences during the summer, but also to provide resources to our camp families that enhance our campers’ lives year-round. We consider it an honor and privilege to partner with parents in helping children thrive at camp and throughout the year.

In this edition, we are thrilled to feature articles and excerpts from four best-selling authors who are passionate about positive youth development. Richard Louv, chairman of the Children and Nature Network and author of the best-selling book Last Child in the Woods, shares his insights about the value of camp in “The Natural Gifts of Camp.” In “Parenting Time Machine,” Tina Payne Bryson challenges us to think about our parenting priorities. An excerpt from Madeline Levine’s book, Teach Your Children Well, offers parenting advice for this overscheduled, technology-focused era. And our favorite happiness guru, Christine Carter, talks about the importance of creating close connections in her article, “Positive Social Connections: The Key to Happiness.”

Camp Historian and long-time staff member, Chuck “Woody” Radke, takes us back into the camp’s 82-year history with an article about camp activities offered in the early days. “Five Reasons Great Parents Send their Kids to Camp” is an article from Sunshine’s blog that was shared more than 13,000 times in 2014.

The goal of Gold Arrow Camp is to provide campers with a community where they build happy childhood memories and form life-long friendships. All of this is done in a supportive community free from pressures, competition, and electronics. Our warm, caring, and fun counselors encourage campers to learn important life skills through their positive modeling and guidance.

We encourage you to learn more about Gold Arrow Camp by visiting www.goldarrowcamp.com. If you are interested in talking to a camp representative on the phone or meeting us in person, please contact us at (800) 554-2267 or mail@goldarrowcamp.com.

We hope you enjoy On Target, and we look forward to having you join us during our 2015 season!

Happy Camping,

Audrey “Sunshine” & Steve “Monkey” Monke Camp Owners/Directors and On Target Editors Editors in Chief Audrey and Steve Monke Art and Design Joline Smith Contributors Alison Moeschberger, Christine Carter, Chuck Radke, Emily Henderson, Jim Sears, Madeline Levine, Richard Louv, Tina Payne Bryson, and 2014 Campers On Target is published annually by Gold Arrow Camp Email ontarget@goldarrowcamp.com © 2014 by Gold Arrow Camp, all rights reserved.

Image Credits Henry Young, Hope Hood, Jason Myles, Joline Smith, Rod Tucknott, and Sarah Bennion Gold Arrow Camp operates under a Special Use Permit from the USDA Forest Service.

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Contents 4

Our Philosophy

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Ask the Chipmunk

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5 Reasons Great Parents Send their Kids to Camp

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Learn to Waterski

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Explore the Sierras

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The Natural Gifts of Camp

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2015 Summer Schedule

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Parenting Time Machine

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Teach Your Children Well

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Camp Map

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Helmet Diving and Aqua Planing

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What’s the Best Age for Camp?

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Counselor Top Ten Read Aloud Books

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It’s Not a Competition

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Teen Programs

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Positive Social Connections: The Key to Happiness

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Creating Connections

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3 Life Lessons Learned at Summer Camp

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Healthy Eating at Camp

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Ways to Connect with GAC

I look forward to these two weeks the whole year!

I love camp and all the friends I’ve made here.

- Ellie Watkins goldarrowcamp.com

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OUR PHILOSOPHY Gold Arrow Camp is a supportive community where lives are enriched through relationships & experiences.

Since 1933, campers

have come to Gold Arrow Camp to Have Fun,

Make Friends, And Grow!

Gold Arrow campers treat others with respect.

Gold Arrow campers value each camper’s right to have a fun experience.

Gold Arrow campers meet appropriate clothing and appearance guidelines.

Read all of our Camper Standards of Behavior & Appearance at http://goldarrowcamp.com/standards-of-behavior-and-appearance/

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Hello current and future campers!

I am the Chipmunk, and one thing I love to do when I am not out collecting nuts or climbing trees is answer your questions about Gold Arrow Camp.

Over the many years I have spent observing camp from my island across the cove, I have acquired a great knowledge of the goings-on at Gold Arrow Camp. Feel free to ask me any of your questions, as I am happy to answer them. Email me at chipmunk@goldarrowcamp.com.

Hope to see you having fun across the cove this summer!

Sincerely, Chipmunk Dear Chipmunk, I don’t eat meat. Do you have food for vegetarians at camp?

Signed, Meatless

see each other at meals and can even sign up to do a Free Time activity together. I’ll see you soon!

Dear Meatless, I’m a vegetarian, too! There are always many options available if you do not choose to eat the main meal. At breakfast, in addition to the main menu items, you can always choose from a variety of cereal options, fresh fruit, yogurt, and bread or bagels for toast. At lunch and dinner, we have a full salad bar with protein options. Also, there are soup and sandwich options at lunch and a pasta bar at dinner. Even if you don’t eat meat, you will find lots of great, healthy foods to eat at every meal!

Dear Chipmunk, I’m not a great swimmer yet, and I saw that a lot of the activities at GAC are on the water. Will I be OK? Do I have to pass a swim test?

Sincerely, Dry Guy

Dear Chipmunk, This will be my first time at camp, and I’m a little nervous.

Will I be able to hug my big brother if I get sad? He always knows how to make me feel better.

Sincerely, Nervous Nellie Dear Nervous Nellie, It’s OK to feel nervous about your first camp experience.

Being away from home can be difficult, but your counselors will help you. If it makes you feel better to hug your brother, your counselors can help you set up a time to do that. You’ll

Dear Dry Guy, Many of our activities take place on the lake, but you will always be wearing a lifejacket when you’re in the water and on our boats. We don’t have a swim test at camp, but even our strongest swimmers wear a lifejacket because it is safer that way. All of our waterfront counselors are also trained lifeguards, so they can also assist you if you are scared in the water.

Dear Chipmunk, I am coming to camp without any friends from home, and I’m worried that I won’t make any new friends. Is it easy to make friends at camp?

Signed, Kind Kid Dear Kind Kid, Many of our campers come to camp without friends from home. One of our main goals for you during camp is for you to

make new friends! You will be in a cabin with 7-9 other kids your age, and your counselors will help you facilitate friendships with your cabin mates. On the first night of camp, we play a game that helps you get to know all of your cabin mates. Your cabin group will do many of the activities together, and you will spend a lot of time with them.

Make sure you come to camp ready to be a good friend by sharing things about yourself with your cabin mates, being a good listener, and showing an interest in other people. Before long, you will have many new friends!

Dear Chipmunk, I don’t like to change my clothes in front of anyone. Is there any way to change privately in my cabin?

Thanks, Shy Guy Dear Shy Guy, If you prefer to change your clothes in private, you will be able to do that in the restrooms.

There aren’t restrooms in the cabins at camp, but every cabin is close to at least one of the restroom buildings. We have private toilet stalls and private showers with curtained changing areas. Some campers also like to change inside their sleeping bags!

Dear Chipmunk, I’m going to be a Tiger this summer. Are there any special privileges for Tigers that I didn’t get as a Bear?

Signed, ROAR Dear ROAR, Other than a later bedtime, each age group has some special events and activities that are unique to that group. As a Bear (grades K-3), you went on Bears’ Adventure and participated in the Bears’ Social. As a Tiger (grades 4-6), you will get to go backpacking with your cabin group, spend two nights on Shaver Island, and socialize with other Tigers at Bingo. When you become a Lion (grades 7-9), you get to go Canyoneering, participate in Lions’ Free Time, and have a special Lions’ Social event.

Dear Chipmunk, I am coming to camp with a lot of friends from my school. I know we can’t all be in a cabin together, but when will we have time to see each other?

Thanks, Connected Dear Connected, You will have many opportunities to socialize with campers in other cabins. In addition to meal times and rest hour, you will be able to see each other at your age group social, on Shaver Island, and during Free Time.

Your counselors can help you find time to visit with campers in other cabins. Thanks for asking!

Have a question for the Chipmunk?

Email your question to: chipmunk@goldarrowcamp.com

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5 Reasons Great Parents Send Their Kids to Camp Gold Arrow Camp has been a life altering, mind-opening experience for my daughter. Over the last four years as a camper she has continued to grow in confidence, can-do-it spirit, and desire to try new activities and have new experiences. She is a GAC-er for life!

- Sophie O’Neal

By Audrey “Sunshine” Monke Many parents won’t allow their child to go on a school field trip or school outdoor education trip unless they are chaperoning, so it’s no surprise that those same parents may find the idea of sending their child to sleep-away camp incomprehensible. As a camp parent, you may get a shocked response from one of these “non-camp” parents. They may ask you things like, “How can you stand having your child away from you for so long?” or, “How will she survive without you?” or, “Isn’t he too young to go to camp alone?” Or, they may comment, “I would never send my child away to camp for two

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weeks.” In all of these negative responses, there is an underlying criticism of your parenting.

If you find yourself in the awkward position of being criticized for the decision to send your young child to camp, you may want some extra “ammunition” to defend your decision. And, if you are never in the position of defending your camp decision, let this list remind you about just a few of the many reasons why you are being a great parent by sending your child to camp!

At camp this summer, your child will...

DEVELOP INDEPENDENCE

GET UNPLUGGED

“I am no longer afraid to be without my parents. I have also been more grateful and thoughtful towards my peers at school.”

- Lucy Mahlmeister, Camper

“Our boys love the unplugged time they get at Gold Arrow. For our teenager to come back and realize how nice it is not to have a phone in his pocket is a great turn of events.

They enjoy the real face time they get with friends and counselors. The boys also appreciate the value of true friends rather than cyber pals.”

- Amy Settlemier, Parent

You are giving your child the opportunity to live and thrive without being with you and under your constant scrutiny. The growth in confidence and independence happen at camp BECAUSE you are not there.

EXPERIENCE OUTDOOR CHILDHOOD FUN & ADVENTURE “Camp has made me want to spend more time outdoors, instead of being a couch potato inside.”

- Jennifer Gross, Alumnus You are giving your child the gift of magical childhood memories – dirt, adventure, story, and joke-filled days and nights spent with friends outdoors, under the stars, and around the campfire. These childhood memories will last forever. And, as Michael Thompson, PhD, so eloquently states, “Our best childhood memories do not include adults.”

RELAX “My kids wait 50 weeks a year for the two weeks at Gold Arrow Camp. GAC is my kids’ ‘happy place.’”

- Stacey Scott, Parent You are giving your child a break from the pressures and stress of competitive sports, school, and you. Forgive me if that offends, but I, too, am a well-meaning but overinvolved parent who provides just a bit too much advice, feedback, and guidance to my children. Our kids need a break from our well-intentioned involvement in their lives.

You are giving your child the chance to unplug and connect face-to-face with other kids and positive young adult role models.

BECOME BETTER AT MAKING AND KEEPING FRIENDS “The most important program GAC offers is not the water activities, not the campfires, and not the backpacking or rock climbing.

It is the social skills program. The “great outdoors” can be a great experience for children only if they know how to live and play together in a cooperative and collegial manner. GAC teaches campers how to make friends, and how to be themselves. These are skills that will well serve the campers their lifetime.”

- Anne Lizdas, Parent The bonding and friendships that happen at camp are different from those that occur at school and on sports teams. The intensity of living together and experiencing life together, without distractions, creates the ideal setting to form life-long friendships and really get to know people well.

If people ever question your decision to send your young child to a traditional, longer camp stay this summer, let them know that it’s hard for you to let your child go, but that you’re giving your child a gift that will have more impact than any material item you’ve ever given.

Audrey “Sunshine” Monke, with her husband Steve, has owned and directed Gold Arrow Camp for the past 26 years. They have five children (ages 11-21) who are campers and staff at camp. Audrey is a graduate of Stanford University and a Certified Camp Director through the American Camp Association.

Read more of Sunshine’s writing about the benefits of camp and parenting tips to help your kids develop independence, responsibility, and social skills at sunshine-parenting.com.

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Learn to Waterski Campers who attend our twoweek sessions spend one or two nights at our Shaver Island Outpost. This is a highlight of camp for many of our campers.

Our island on Shaver Lake offers the ideal setting for campers to learn and hone their waterskiing, wakeboarding, and kneeboarding skills. With competition-style ski boats, experienced instructors, and hours of time behind the boat, campers learn and improve their skills rapidly during their stay at Shaver Lake. While there, campers have the opportunity to build friendships with campers in other cabin groups. The nightly social time at Shaver is around a campfire that is large enough for all campers and counselors to gather to sing songs, play games and make s’mores. Camping on the beach and falling asleep watching the shooting stars are also memorable experiences from their stay at the outpost.

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Many returning campers choose to spend an entire week at Shaver Island, in addition to their two-week regular session, by participating in one of our Shaver Water Sports Specialty Camps. These three-week sessions are offered at the beginning of the summer (Session 5: June 21 – July 11), with the Shaver week at the beginning of the session, and at the end of the summer (Session 6: August 9-29), with the Shaver week at the end of the session.

There is also the option to attend just the one week at Shaver Island. This is not recommended for campers who have not already attended a regular session at Gold Arrow Camp, as they will not experience any of the activities and special events offered only at our main camp location.

With competition-style ski boats, experienced instructors, and hours of time behind the boat, campers learn and improve their skills rapidly during their stay at Shaver Lake.

Explore the Sierras GAC is unique among camps in offering our young campers the chance to hike, explore, and camp out in the wilderness.

We are surrounded by beautiful trails and lakes in the John Muir and Kaiser wilderness areas.

Depending on their age and ability, campers enjoy nonstrenuous trips ranging from four to eight miles round trip. Groups play games along the way, and the pace is slow. Campers take breaks from hiking often to drink from their water bottles, eat trail mix, and rest.

Many kids are hesitant about backpacking… But, over and over, we have heard campers recall their backpacking trip as one of their favorite camp memories.

Once at their camp sites, campers play, help cook dinner, and get to experience living in nature. They also have a lot of free play and exploring time.

Campers enjoy building forts and structures out of sticks and pine cones. Some kids are hesitant about backpacking because they don’t think carrying a pack sounds like fun. But, over and over, we have heard campers recall their backpacking trip as one of their favorite camp memories.

Back in the 1960s and v, when all GAC campers attended camp for a month, backpacking trips were longer. We are still committed to getting kids out in nature, even when they’re only with us for two weeks. We will continue to teach campers about how fun it is to be in the outdoors, because we know the positive, life-long impact a love of nature can have. We hear from many past campers asking for advice about where to backpack in this area, because they have fond memories of their GAC backpacking trips.

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Children are simply happier and healthier when they have frequent and varied opportunities for experiences in the out-of-doors.

By Richard Louv

Richard Louv is the author of

Last Child in the Woods: Saving

Our Children from Nature-Deficit Disorder and chairman of the

Children & Nature Network (http:// www.childrenandnature.org/).

Every summer, when I was in junior high and high school, my buddy Pete Sebring would disappear for a few weeks to a camp in the mountains west of Colorado Springs. I resented it. For me, those humid July weeks back in Kansas dragged, and then Pete would come home telling tales of adventure — as if he had been to some alpine Oz.

of Resources reports that, while wolves were, by official measure, eradicated in the 1930s, “there have been sporadic reports of wolves in Colorado over the decades” — none confirmed. They may have been wolf-hybrids or dogs or, just maybe, wolves. “Their night howls were long, sonorous, and unnerving,” Pete recalls.

As it turns out, that camp shaped Pete in ways neither of us realized at the time. He credits his summers in Colorado with giving him a foundation for success and longevity — more than three decades — as a teacher.

One more reason I wished I could have gone to summer camp with him.

“The camp encouraged me to invent activities, such as pioneering, survival hikes and overnights, and identifying native plants of central Colorado,” he says. “Once while picking ground plums, which tasted like raw green beans, we uncovered an ancient hunting site full of arrowheads, charcoal, and flint chips. I also encountered brown bears, coyotes, pumas, and wolves — one white and one black. Only the kids with me believed me.”

I was one of those who didn’t believe that Pete had encountered wolves. This morning, I checked the history: The Colorado Department

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Still, during those years, I had my own adventures — a free-range childhood spent fishing and chasing snakes and building forts in the woods.

Those experiences shaped my life every bit as much as Pete’s time at camp shaped his.

Today, too few children and young people have either experience — free-range or camp. In my book, Last Child in the Woods, I describe how young people can likely tell you about the Amazon rain forest, but they’ll likely be hard pressed to describe the last time they explored the woods in solitude or lay in a field listening to the wind and watching the clouds move. Nature is becoming an abstraction, something to watch on the flip-down TV screen from the back seat of a minivan.

In 2005, “Generation M: Media in the Lives of Eight- to Eighteen-Year-Olds,” conducted by the Kaiser Family Foundation, revealed that children are plugged into some kind of electronic medium an average of five-anda-half hours a day, “the equivalent of a full-time job, and more time than they spend doing anything else besides sleeping.”

2015 SUMMER SCHEDULE Two-Week Sessions (grades K-9 )

One reason kids aren’t going outside as much is parental fear. News and entertainment media have conditioned us to believe that life outside the front door is far more dangerous than it actually is, at least from strangerdanger. Nonetheless, this fear is unlikely to go away, which is one of the reasons parents are likely to value camps even more in the future than they do today. Risk is always a part of life, but camps can offer parents the reassurance that their children will be safe as they receive the gifts of nature.

The physical benefits are obvious; others are more subtle but no less important. For example, research shows that nature experiences significantly reduce children’s stress.

Free play in natural areas enhances children’s cognitive flexibility, problem-solving ability, creativity, self-esteem, and self-discipline. Effects of Attention Deficit Disorder are reduced when children have regular access to the out-of-doors. Studies of outdoor-education programs geared toward troubled youth — especially those diagnosed with mental-health problems — show a clear therapeutic value.

Session 1: Session 2: Session 3: Session 4: Tuition:

$3,500

Three-Week Sessions (grades 4-9) Session 5: Session 6: Tuition:

June 21 - July 11 August 9 - August 29 $4,850

One-Week Sessions Shaver Water Sports June: Shaver Water Sports August: Mini Camp: Tuition:

June 21 - June 27 (grades 4-9) August 23 - August 29 (grades 4-9) August 23 - August 29 (grades K-9) $1,950

Outdoor Leadership Course (grades 9-11)

Children are simply happier and healthier when they have frequent and varied opportunities for experiences in the out-of-doors.

OLC:

July 12 - July 25

Tuition:

$2,900

Family Camp (all ages) Family Camp:

Nature-oriented camps also help care for the health of the earth; many studies show that nature play in childhood is the chief determining factor in the environmental consciousness of adults.

Tuition:

August 29 - August 31 Tuition varies, more information at: goldarrowcamp.com/family-camp/

Enroll Now! Become a Monther!

Clearly there’s more to camp than s’mores. Pete could have told us that. In fact, he did.

June 28 - July 11 July 12 - July 25 July 26 - August 8 August 9 - August 22

Add a second two-week session to become a “Monther,” and receive $1,000 off the second session!

Enroll online by visiting our home page at goldarrowcamp. com and clicking “Enroll Online.”

Sessions fill quickly! Check our website for current availability at goldarrowcamp.com/dates-rates/

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Imagine your children in the FUTURE, and how you got them there.

By Tina Payne Bryson, PhD. Here’s a little exercise that can help you think about what you want to prioritize as a parent. First, engage in some time travel. Imagine yourself in the future, when your kids are grown. (If you want, you can have it turn out that you don’t look any older than you do now and that you’re driving a convertible sports car instead of a stinky minivan.) From that vantage point, look back at the way you raised your children. How will you feel about the parenting decisions you’ve made? The experiences you’ve given your kids?

The child development and parenting expert helping you raise children who are happy, healthy, and fully themselves.

Dr. Tina Payne Bryson is the co-author (with Dan Siegel) of the best-selling parenting books THE WHOLE-BRAIN CHILD and NO-DRAMA DISCIPLINE.

For me personally, I’m constantly learning new things that make me say, “I wish I’d known that earlier.”

I expect I’ll probably write a book in the future about what the parenting expert wishes she’d done differently, given the perspective of time (and emerging research).

But if you were to ask me now to predict what I will one day say are the most important things my husband and I did as parents that made the biggest difference in how well our three boys turned out—in my imagined future, it so happens that my kids are fantastic humans who have a very young-looking mother—here’s what I’d say.

1. WE DISCIPLINED BY USING REFLECTIVE DIALOGUES AND COLLABORATIVE PROBLEMSOLVING, RATHER THAN PUNITIVE CONSEQUENCES. Actually, I wish we did more of this, but I truly believe that traditional punishment as a discipline technique is not only less kind and caring, but much less effective as well when it comes to changing behaviors and building character. Nearly any discipline situation can be better handled by talking to our kids and at times even asking for their opinions on how to address a situation. Firm boundaries and high expectations can be maintained while also using discipline moments to build insight, empathy, and problemsolving.

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2. WE BUILT SECURE RELATIONSHIPS WITH THEM. Instead of simply “managing” our boys and getting them to their activities, we got to know them, and let them know us.

We all talked and laughed and argued together, deepening the connections between us all. We consistently (not perfectly) responded quickly and predictably to their needs, and they had repeated experiences that wired their brains to know that they can trust in relationships. And, we were tuned in to their emotional world—we focused on understanding and talking about the internal experience: thoughts, feelings, wishes, regrets, motivations, etc.

Sensitive, emotionally attuned,

predictable care leads to secure attachment. Secure attachment is the single best predictor for children to thrive. We weren’t perfect parents, but we did build strong relationships with our kids.

3. WE SENT THEM TO SLEEPAWAY SUMMER CAMP. Our boys happen to have gone to a magical place called Camp Chippewa in Northern Minnesota. But summer camp in general is great for kids, in that it allows them to overcome difficult situations like homesickness.

Being away from parents and living in a cabin with other kids and mentors of all ages is transformative for many children.

The activities at camp are great; they have a blast learning to

canoe and shoot a bow and pitch a tent, but it’s the skills, the mastery, and the frustration management that make it so good for their development.

The friendships they make, the traditions and rituals they learn, being in nature, and the independence they gain are fun, and they build resilience. They learn a lot about themselves through this experience.

4. WE MADE OUR HOME A PLACE THEIR FRIENDS WANTED TO BE. One of the best ways we got to know our kids was by watching them interact with their friends.

We also liked getting to influence the environment our boys and their peers grew up in.

5. WE GAVE THEM OTHER ADULTS WHO CARED ABOUT THEM. Grandparents, aunts, uncles, and other close friends all became important people in the lives of our children. They never wondered whether they were worth loving or being paid attention to, because there was always a crowd of people in their lives who were loving them and paying attention to them.

6. WE WERE PRESENT WITH THEM WITHOUT RESCUING ALL THE TIME. Sure, there were plenty of times when we gave the distracted “uh-huh” while we heard about the latest Lego creation. But we did our best to really be there with our boys. To listen to them, to talk to them, to pay attention to what bothered them and what mattered to them. We wanted them to know that we

delighted in them as people, and that we were there for them.

Always. Even when they were badly behaved, or they were having meltdowns. We saw our job as walking with them through struggles and letting them know we were there with them—without rescuing them from every negative emotion or situation.

7. WE GAVE THEM A CHANCE TO FIND AND DO WHAT THEY LOVED. Whether it was sports or piano or art or joke-telling, we did all we could to let our kids chase and enjoy their passions.

8. WE PROTECTED PLAYTIME. I’m not saying that there weren’t periodic seasons when our boys ended up being over-scheduled, but for the most part we worked hard to make sure they had time to just hang out and play.

We were big fans of enriching activities, but not at the expense of having time for unstructured play that let them imagine and dream and even deal with boredom.

Learn more about Dr. Bryson at TinaBryson.com, where you can subscribe to her blog and read her articles about kids, camping, and parenting.

So that’s an example of my list.

What would be on yours?

Psychotherapist at Pediatric and Adolescent Psychology Associates in Arcadia, CA

Notice that this exercise asks you to think about what you’re doing well. You could make a similar list about what you wish you’d done differently. The point in all of this is simply to remain aware and intentional about what we’re doing as parents. We might see changes we want to make, but we’ll also realize that there’s plenty we’re doing that we’ll look back on some day and smile, and even be proud of.

International speaker for parents, educators, and clinicians, and consults with residential camps all across the country School counselor at Saint Mark’s School in Altadena Director of Parenting Education for Camp Chippewa (Cass Lake, MN) Child Development Director for Lantern Camps.

Earned her Ph.D. from the University of Southern California, where her research explored attachment science, childrearing theory, and the emerging field of interpersonal neurobiology

Being away from parents and living in a cabin with other kids and mentors of all ages is transformative for many children.

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Excerpt from Madeline Levine’s best-selling book, Teach Your Children Well: Why Values and Coping Skills Matter More Than Grades, Trophies, or “Fat Envelopes” WHY WE HAVE DOWNGRADED THE IMPORTANCE OF PLAY

Madeline Levine, Ph.D. is a psychologist, educator and co-founder of Challenge Success, a project of the Stanford Graduate School of Education. A New York Times bestselling author, she is a frequent keynote speaker for schools, parents and business leaders. Dr. Levine lives just outside of San Francisco with her husband and is the (extremely) proud mother of three sons.

We hesitate to interfere with our kids’ preoccupation with a dazzling array of technology. While most of us are comfortable limiting some screen time, particularly television time, we are far more reluctant to limit screen time that we see as “productive” computer time. Parents are afraid that their kids won’t be able to keep up with other digital natives, and see curtailing use as hampering potential. Certainly there’s a difference between playing Angry Birds and creating a family montage on the computer. But both take time away from unstructured play.

So much seems to be riding on these early years that parents don’t want to waste any time on something that is not educational. The outdoors, which is free, is rarely considered a learning environment. But in fact, it is one of the most important learning environments available to our children. “Go out and play” may have gotten us out of our own mothers’ hair, but it also encouraged us to figure out how to socialize with our own “tribe” as well as how to appreciate the natural world. No educational toy in the world can hold a candle to creek walks and abandoned lot expeditions.

I don’t remember much about third or fourth grade, but I do remember meeting

my best friend, Leslie, after school every day and walking home together, stopping off at the corner grocery for red pistachios that stained our fingers, and eating them under the tangled brush in the neglected lot behind our houses as we dreamt about the people we hoped to become.

We have forgotten how to play ourselves.

How can we communicate that play is a necessary part of a good life if it’s missing from our own? Most of us are too rushed and overwhelmed, too busy multitasking and chauffeuring, to find any “playtime” for ourselves.

A harried young mom who is also a pediatric oncologist is in my office falling apart because of the multiple demands on her time and energy. All of the options we are talking about are logistical. How many hours can she effectively work? When will her two kids be old enough for her to return to work on a full-time basis? Can her husband be recruited to take responsibility for some of the children’s extracurricular activities? I feel like we should put a poster board on my office walls so that we can draw a flow chart.

It hits me that no one can be expected to spend every minute of every day attending to the needs of others. This is why so many of the mothers I have seen over the years have taken to private guilty pleasures, from cocaine to alcohol to overeating; these things could be done quickly and took little time out of an overscheduled day.

challengesuccess.org

The outdoors, which is free, is rarely considered a learning environment. But in fact, it is one of the most important learning environments available to 14

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our children.

Experts recommend two hours of unstructured play for every hour of structured play. While your child is playing take half that time for your own play - a craft project, a good novel (or a bad one), looking at catalogs, sitting outside, dancing. If the very idea of “playing” as an adult confuses you, think back to your own childhood and the things you spent time on and enjoyed doing. Try them again. As with everything else about children’s behavior, there’s nothing like a good role model. If you value play, your children will, too.

HOW PARENTS CAN HELP UNPLUG Limit the amount of time your children are allowed to sit in front of a screen. In elementary school, this probably should be no more than two hours a day, which includes all screens: TV, video games, computers, smart phones, tablets, and whatever other electronic device your child may be looking at by the time you read this book.

ENCOURAGE YOUR CHILD TO PLAY OUTSIDE Introduce freedom gradually. If you’re in a safe neighborhood, your children should be outside playing (without you hovering nearby) around age nine if they’ve

demonstrated an adequate capacity to be responsible. If they come when called, follow directions, and cross a street safely then they are probably quite capable of navigating the neighborhood. If you’re nervous, have a chat with a local police officer, who can give you an objective view of the dangers of your neighborhood. Many parents don’t feel comfortable giving their kids permission to simply hang out in the neighborhood until about age thirteen. To put this in perspective, the average teenager in America has sexual intercourse at age seventeen. Let’s be real. Our kids need more than four years between crossing the street and putting on a condom.

are over-programmed often show signs of stress, particularly physical signs like headaches and stomachaches. If your child is complaining of either of these symptoms, have him checked by your pediatrician. If all is well, take a close look at his schedule, and, with your child, whittle it down. One way to do this is to ask him to rank the importance of his activities. You may find that the soccer team you thought he loved is way down on his list. Keep his top two and suspend the rest.

DON’T OVERPROGRAM YOUR CHILD Understandably, extracurriculars are a good way to broaden our kids’ experiences and make sure that they have structure after school, especially when both parents are working. But David Elkind, the godfather (well, actually the maven) of healthy child development, says that children of this age should, at most, have three extracurricular activities – one social (Scouting, church, or synagogue youth program), one physical (Little League, dance), and one artistic (piano lessons, drawing). Playing MLB 12: The Show on a Sony PlayStation does not count as a physical activity. At this stage, extracurriculars, for the most part, are not daily activities. Kids who

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HELMET DIVING AQUA PLANING I believe […] that every boy should develop some sort of hobby […] a pleasant pastime that you

choose when the day’s work is done; a love of doing something for the thing itself.

- Manny Vezie, Founder of Gold Arrow Camp

Chuck “Woody” Radke, a 20 year veteran staff member, has been researching Gold Arrow Camp’s history for a book he’s writing about Camp. Many of the stories Woody has gathered from GAC’s early years have come through interviews and writings from people who were there, including Manny’s oldest son, Krieg Vezie (1932-2013) and Smoke Signals, the Camp newspaper that was published three times during the summer of 1945.

Most of the activities Gold Arrow campers participate in today are in fact the same ones Manny’s first charges enjoyed over eighty years ago, including Manny’s favorite: canoeing.

Krieg reported that Manny had “wonderful canoes” and that since his time at Red Arrow, they were always “one of his great loves.” Campers learned to properly paddle and mastered all the different strokes, and though it wasn’t that popular, Manny always made it a primary activity at camp. One of the ways he made it more thrilling was to take the boys out of camp on “river running” trips, said Krieg: “In the thirties boys ran the San Joaquin and King’s River by canoes […]. Few were experienced in river running and a canoe was totaled each trip.”

It got expensive to lose a canoe each time out and, of course, it was a bit risky, but no one ever got hurt. Manny also took a few canoe trips in Yosemite “just to see the waterfalls and the deer,” Krieg said.

There was also a sailing program with “two classes of boats,” said Krieg: 12-foot-long Snowbirds and “Snipes that had a main sail and a jib.” The first two years, Manny didn’t have a huge fleet, but by 1940, Krieg reported the program featured “quite a few sailboats.”

Campers were given instruction on the rules of the lake and rights of way before they launched, and there was a series of tests boys could take and skills they could demonstrate to earn the designation of “Skipper.” Once boys piloted their sailboats skillfully, they were awarded a white officer’s cap that had the Gold Arrow Camp symbol on the front. “I think I wore that cap for years, all through school,” said Krieg. People would ask him what it was, and he announced proudly “I’m a sailing skipper. I have passed the solo test to sail in some heavy winds.” It was this kind of pride in individual accomplishment that Manny wanted all of his Gold Arrow campers to experience and take home with them.

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Among other water activities, there was swimming, motor boating, paddle boarding, log rolling, kayaking, and something Krieg called “platter” boating: “These were small boats […] about three feet long, and the boys would kneel in the boat and move it with their hands.” On Sunday afternoons, these water activities were frequently on display at camp “water festivals.”

Campers battled it out in the “two way inlet platterboat race” or the “one lap plunge swim,” with winners earning points toward all-tent trips to Lakeshore for sodas; no matter where they finished, all participants earned a hearty “two hips and a hooray” from the counselors for giving it their best shot.

Finally, later in the forties, Manny introduced “aqua planing” to camp, a milder version of waterskiing. Krieg said that Manny was actually “very scared of water-skiing because he felt if a person fell, the water-ski would come back and hit him in the head.”

With aqua-planing, campers just fell off into the water, and the injury risk was minimal.

When they weren’t playing around on top of the water, they were skulking around under it. The activity was called “helmet diving,” where Krieg said campers “put a heavy steel helmet on [their] heads and went underwater and walked around the bottom of the lake.”

Camper Thomas Wyatt (1945) spoke of his experience with the activity:

Above: Helmet diver getting ready to explore the lake bottom.

At the close of our session, when there were few campers in camp, I was at the swimming area and was offered a chance to try the diving helmet. It was a shoulder-mounted affair, with a face plate. I was given a rope to tug on to signal for more air or less air from the person manning the air pump. Well, I started out and became submerged, and then forgot the codes for more air! So, I swam out from under the helmet! So much for my first underwater adventure!

Camper Chas Luckman in the August 3rd edition of Smoke Signals described it as an activity that required “trusty assistants at the air pump” as campers “descended into the darkness of the lake’s blue waters.”

Those same assistants then waited for “a tug and then a tug tug at the rope” before pulling the camper up.

Luckman’s account also tells of the courageous Bill Brown, the junior counselor who descended “some distance down” to rescue a megaphone a waterfront

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Above: Camper exploring the lake in a platter boat.

Left: Campers making arrows to use at the archery range.

lifeguard had dropped. He resurfaced to a hero’s welcome, megaphone in hand. Wrote Luckman, “As the frozen diver was being relieved of his helmet he shakingly commented, ‘I am never going down in such deep water again.’” Suffice to say that helmet diving is not among the offerings for current Gold Arrow campers.

Back on land, archery was one of the “primary sports in the early days” of camp, said Krieg. Manny had set up a number of archery ranges with targets at various distances as well as pop-up targets of small animals and a deer that would dart across the stream on a pulley.

“You never knew when that deer was going to cross,” said Krieg, “but when it did you had a chance to see if you could hit this moving target.” Campers were always thrilled to hit the deer and to earn merit pins on the range from the National Camp Archery Association. To liven things up a bit, Manny even considered a “flu flu” range, said Krieg, where campers could “shoot an arrow straight up in the sky and land it on a target below.” The counselors badgered Manny to do it, according to Krieg, but at least in this case, he felt it was too dangerous.

There was also riflery, of course, and campers shot .22long rifles at targets set at a distance of fifty feet to earn medals from the National Rifle Association. All boys had to “take a special test” to use the rifles, and could qualify

for awards under the NRA’s “Junior Marksman” program.

Campers were given a rule book that described benchmarks like “Sharpshooter” and “Expert Rifleman” and bound them to a sportsmen’s code by which they promised, among other things, to “never allow the muzzle of [the] gun to point at anything which [they] do not intend to shoot.” Many a camper returned home with his prized riflery rule book and his scored targets to share with Mom and Dad. When the boys weren’t shooting targets, they were likely riding horses, one of the two largest programs at Gold Arrow Camp. Smoke Signals editor Bob Shelton wrote that without horses, “half of Gold Arrow’s charm and color would fade into the afterglow.” It was a program that Manny insisted be a Gold Arrow focal point as he knew the appeal horsemanship and the romantic myth of the frontier had for the modern American boy. By 1945, Manny had twenty-nine horses in camp with “a dozen or so more […] scattered among the mountains,” wrote Shelton.

With so many horses available to campers every summer, it was likely that a few would get loose from time to time, said Krieg. To keep track of them all, the horses were branded, an event campers were invited to attend when camp opened in mid-July. “The kids,” said Krieg, “loved to smell that horse flesh.” The men in

charge of the horses and the rebranding event were “Kit” Carson Shade and Jim Gordon, with “Doc McClure in charge of heating the iron,” wrote Smoke Signals staffer Mike Millikan. Carson “actually did the dirty work” but “only one or two horses seemed to mind it very much.” As a result, wrote Millikan, “the boys began shouting for their money back.”

In the end, nine horses were branded in July 1945, indelibly registered with the capital letters “VZ,” which Millikan reminds us “stands for Mr. Vezie.”

Manny loved the horse program and frequently led campers on trail rides to the “Indian Swimming Hole” and Lakeshore, among other places. While on the trail, he shared a story with campers about two miners who were scared they’d be robbed of their gold, so they hid their stash in the mountains as it began to snow.

Upon their return, the miners couldn’t find their treasure: “I believe the gold is somewhere near Gold Arrow Camp, boys,” Manny would say. “Let’s see if we can find it.” It was a slow, methodical story, said Krieg, one that typically culminated in an open meadow, where one lucky boy would always spot a big canvas bag of gold-foil candy bars. “I found it,” the boy would yell, and Manny, in his slow, easy voice, would tell the boys that gold was not very good to eat, but candy bars sure were. “He handed the candy bars out to the kids,” said Krieg. “He told these stories all the time as part of camp.”

Above: Campers on their way to the Indian Swimming Hole on horseback.

Left: Camper shooting a rifle at the riflery range.

Additionally, horses were the centerpiece of the pack trips Manny took every year, beginning in 1935. One Smoke Signals artifact from August 15, 1945 (“A Hundred Miles of Rugged Beauty”) describes how Manny ran short overnights and two- to three-day trips during the regular camp season, followed every August by a two-week post-season trip for “campers who [had] proven […] able to acquit themselves with credit in outdoor activities.” These postcamp trips were big productions, with anywhere from twenty to thirty adults and campers taking to the Sierra high country. It can be argued, based on the verbiage devoted to them in Smoke Signals, that Manny’s pack trips were, in fact,

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Above: One of Manny’s famous end of summer pack trips.

Photo credits for this article: Ben Wetzel and Robert Frampton, Gold Arrow Camp Archive.

the highlight of every boy’s summer. There, we read of the “mighty” Rangers’ trip to Coyote Lake, “where the natives use mosquitoes for can openers” and the lake glistened “in the westing sun”; of tent five’s first pack trip to Red Lake, arriving after a “tiresome ride” to a “meal of sandwiches and soup” followed by “snow fights” and a thunderstorm; and of tent four’s “short mile horseback ride” to the Indian Swimming Hole, where they set up camp and had a dinner of “brown potatoes, gravy, emerald string beans, and a whole watermelon,” before a “pinecone fight […] without a casualty” and a campfire with “ginger snaps and stories.” Indeed, the pages of the camp newspaper are full of descriptions that seem to come straight from the pages of cowboy adventure novels.

But before any boy could participate in one of these memorable experiences, they had to pass what Krieg called “test camp,” an area set up below the road, overlooking the lake in what is now called “The Ridge” (Cabins 23, 24 and 25). Boys had to go to test camp for one night to “make sure [they] kept a clean camp,” said Krieg. Boys did all the things they would do at a normal campsite, then counselors came the next day to check them out. If they passed, they were eligible to go on a pack trip. According to Krieg, there was no camper who ever failed test camp, but there was some sport in casting a shadow of doubt when the counselors did their final checks. “You left a paper over here,” they might say, or “You didn’t do the right thing over there.” It was all in good fun, said Krieg, and in the end, they all learned to be good campers.

Arguably, the post-season pack trips were Manny’s finest hours and perhaps the excursions from which he derived the greatest satisfaction. He planned the itineraries himself, changing them each year while keeping them under wraps until departure as a way

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to build anticipation in the boys. Invariably, he led the rugged company to places “in God’s Great Grandeur […] where the gold trout are seldom bothered by man.”

All trips began with a truck ride from Huntington Lake to Mono Hot Springs where explorers found their horses and supplies waiting. Imagine the thrill the boys must have felt to have their own horses for two weeks. In one abridged travel log, captured in Smoke Signals, Manny led the group to Bear Creek before heading over Selden Pass, 11,500 feet “up to Heaven where the view stretches out a hundred miles over Marie Lakes on one side and Heart Lake on the other.” They camped and fished for three days at Sally Keys Lake before dropping for two days into Blaney Meadows, “where the fishing is fine and hot springs gush forth.” The final leg of the journey took them to Florence Lake, where the truck to take them back to camp awaited: “In all, we have been twelve days on a trail we will cherish forever”: Mix this up with outdoor cooking, And miles and miles of joyful riding.

And the smells of pine and fir trees, And the chores of trail and camplife.

Flavor with friendship and brand new tales, Told over the campfire nights on the trail; And you’ll find you’ve done something You’ll talk of for years!

- Smoke Signals, August 15, 1945 Indeed, it is difficult to imagine a boy who—presented with glorious, untrammeled views, gushing hot springs, and his own horse on which he beheld it all—wouldn’t talk of the cherished experience for years. Manny wanted his boys, through the pack trip experience, to leave feeling like confident trailblazers and frontiersmen: “In all the pack trips,” wrote Shelton, Manny “never yet found a disappointed camper!”

What’s the Best Age for Camp?

By Audrey “Sunshine” Monke You probably want a number here. If you’re only going to read these first two sentences, then I’ll pick the age of nine.

But my real answer is a bit more complex.

When to start sending your child to sleep-away camp is a decision that depends on you, your parenting style, and your child’s temperament. Many kids have extremely fun and successful camp experiences as young as six years old, but that’s too young for most kids. And, for some parents, the thought of their child EVER going to camp (without them) is unimaginable. If you’re one of those parents, please read Five Reasons Great Parents Send Their Kids to Camp (p.6). Sometimes, “he’s not ready for camp” actually means you’re not ready. Realizing that your child can be okay without you is sometimes hard on parents, and it’s a big step to let them have the independent experience of summer camp.

These are the guidelines I recommend to parents who are ready to send their child to camp but aren’t sure what age is best.

If your child is 5 or under, that’s too young for overnight camp alone.

Go to a family camp together (check ours out at goldarrowcamp. com/family-camp), or try an American Camp Association accredited day camp program in your area, which is a great way to get the feel for what camp is all about!

Only send your 6-8 year old to camp if: Your child is a fairly independent kid (not clingy to you) and can take a shower on his/her own. If your child happily goes to school and is fine at day camps and other activities without you constantly by his/her side, then he/she is probably ready for camp. Parents often worry about the logistical stuff with young kids. “Will someone make sure he eats? Puts on sunscreen?

What if he wets the bed?” Know that, at a well-run,accredited camp program, counselors are trained to take care of young children well. Counselors will make sure your camper gets enough water, eats properly, and puts on sunscreen. Most camps work with families of bed wetters to help them feel comfortable coming to camp. You just need to make a plan on how to manage the bed wetting with the staff at your child’s camp using a pull-up and keeping small plastic trash bags in the bottom of the sleeping bag for the counselor to throw away privately works well).

Above Image courtesy of Rod Tucknott.

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Your child is ASKING to go. This usually occurs with younger siblings who visit or hear about camp from older brothers and sisters. They’ve been watching and hearing about the fun for a few years and they want “in.” I’ve often been at camp events where older kids are coming to hear about camp, and the younger siblings in attendance end up begging their parents to let them go to camp, too.

You, as the parent, are confident in your child’s ability to be away from you. And you are able to express that confidence to your child. And YOU can handle the separation.

For young kids, focus on if your child is ready. This is not the age to force camp upon a hesitant child.

Once your child is 9-10 years old, I have three different guidelines, depending on your child and you.

1. If your 9-10 year old is excited to go to camp, go for it! Find a camp and sign him/ her up!

2. If your 9-10 year old is hesitant about going to camp: Talk with other families whose kids go to camp to expose him/her to the idea.

Hearing how much other kids like camp might encourage him/her to want to go.

Attend camp information sessions and browse websites. Watch camp videos to show your child the fun that happens at camp.

If exposing your child to the idea of camp gets him/her excited, then forge ahead with signing up and sending your child to camp. If he/she gets “cold feet,” use the discussion strategies mentioned in my blog post about “Messages for an Anxious Camper” (http://sunshineparenting.wordpress. com/2012/07/05/messages-for-ananxious-camper/) to let him/her know why camp will be good for him/her.

3. If your 9-10 year old child is STILL hesitant, you have two choices: The Hard Choice (I think Michael Thompson, PhD. would say the better one): Tell your child, “I know you’re ready for this experience and it will be a good experience for you that I don’t want you to

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miss out on. I know you’re nervous, but this is something that is important for you to do.”

Read the book Homesick and Happy as your homework before you broach the subject with your child. Explain all the benefits of camp and how you think camp will be great for him/her and how it is an important step in his/her growth and development. Let your child know that you, as the parent, think it’s an important experience that you don’t want him/her to miss out on. And then, sign up for camp that is a good fit for your child and offers activities he/she is interested in! Making this choice requires being able to stand your ground and not give in to whining. Better to not dwell on the topic until it gets closer to summer. Sign up but don’t talk about it too much, too far in advance if your child is especially anxious about it.

The Easier Choice (for now): Give your child a one year “pass,” but follow through!

“Okay, no camp this summer, but next

year you’re for sure going to a camp we choose together that is a good fit for you.

I know you’re ready, and it will be a great experience for you that I don’t want you to miss out on. I know you’re nervous, but this is something that is important for you to do.”

Read the book Homesick and Happy as your homework over the year! Follow through and make going to camp next summer non-negotiable. Talk with your friends and research an accredited camp program that’s a good fit for your child. Attend “meet and greet” events or camp tour days to meet other camp families.

Know that kids who are hesitant about camp at 9 or 10 are likely to still be hesitant at 13, and possibly hesitant at 18 about going to college. Kids who are nervous about being away from home and parents need to figure out how to work through those feelings, and a week or two at camp is an easy way to start! It’s actually easier to start camp

at 9 or 10 and work through those difficult homesick emotions without also contending with puberty. So… knowing that it’s great to get your child some independent experience early, forge ahead confidently (or at least pretend you’re confident!).

If your child is 11: It’s REALLY time. See above steps but don’t do the easier choice. Remember when you were 11? Your best memories were not hanging out with your parents. Time to get some fun, independent experience!

If your child is 12 or older and has never been away to camp, please let them go!

Seriously. I’ve been at camp fairs, where a mother with a child taller than she is tells me, in front of her child, “He’s WAY too young to be away from me for two weeks.” I look at the young person standing next to her and want to say, “He’s not too young. You just don’t want him to be away from you.”

But, I can’t say that unless it’s a friend who I can be really frank with. So, I just feel badly for the kid, who longingly looks at camp pictures but knows that his mom won’t ever let him go.

Your older child will likely not be the only first year camper his/her age. There will be fewer new kids at camp in that age group, but camp kids are welcoming, so don’t worry. Let your child be part of the process of picking a camp, but please send them to camp! I’ve met many families who waited until their child was 12 or 13 years old to start camp, only to be disappointed that they had so few summers to enjoy at camp before they were too old. Plus, the kids who tend to have the most extreme homesickness are the older ones who have never been away. But, if your child is one who may experience that extreme homesickness, isn’t it much better that it happen during a 2-3 week summer program than when they’re a freshman in college?

Too many kids are not making it in college because they don’t have the coping skills to be away from home. Give your child the gift of early independence to help them develop the skills they need to thrive as a young adult!

So now you see why I couldn’t give a short answer. I hope this helps you make the decision of when is the best age to send your child to camp.

Counselor Top Ten Read Aloud Books GAC counselors read aloud to campers at bedtime. These are some of their favorites from 2014:

Wonder R.J. Palacio

Star Girl

By Jerry Spinelli

There’s a Boy in the Girls’ Bathroom

Matilda

By Roald Dahl

Chicken Soup for the Girl’s Soul

By Jack Canfield,

Mark Victor Hansen, Patty Hansen

and Irene Dunlap

Holes

By Louis Sachar

Boy

By Roald Dahl

Hoot

By Carl Hiaasen

By Louis Sachar

James & the Giant Peach

By Roald Dahl

Peter & the Star Catchers

By Dave Barry and Ridley Pearson

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Itís not a COMPETITION

By Alison “Bean” Moeschberger One of the central philosophies at Gold Arrow Camp is our focus on non-competitive activities. Campers try a variety of activities and push themselves to overcome fears and learn new skills. Through the process of setting and achieving personal goals, campers gain a sense of confidence and independence. Our instructors work closely with campers to introduce each activity at a basic level and provide more advanced skills as campers move toward mastery. Rather than competing against each other, as they do in many team sports, campers learn to be supportive of their cabin mates and work to improve their own competence in each activity.

Some activities, including Water Sports and Target Sports, have patch programs that help break up skills into manageable and achievable goals. Once campers have earned the patch for the initial level at each activity, the requirements for the next patch level help them set a goal and know how to improve their skills at that activity.

Even after campers have earned all of the patches for an activity, they continue to find ways to have fun and grow as they set new and more challenging goals for themselves.

More than the achievements campers make in each activity, the lasting impact of camp is the sense of accomplishment campers develop through the process of trying new activities. Taking a break from competitive sports, campers learn how to be an encouragement to others, celebrating their own successes along with those of their peers. Persevering through difficulties, embracing failure, and being open to new experiences are just some of the great lessons campers learn at Gold Arrow Camp.

Alison Moeschberger is Program Director at Gold Arrow Camp. A graduate of Purdue University, she taught school for five years prior to joining camp’s yearround staff as Program and Personnel Director. She has been a part of Gold Arrow Camp for the past 21 years as a camper, CIT, and staff member. Alison oversees all staff recruitment, hiring, and training. She also oversees all camp program activities. Alison is married to Andy “Soy” Moeschberger, who oversees camp operations during the summer. Their two-year-old daughter, Ellie, lives with them at camp all summer and is looking forward to becoming a camper in a few years.

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What matters most in a child’s development, they say, is not how much information we can stuff into her brain in the first few years. What matters, instead, is whether we are able to help her develop a very different set of qualities, a list that includes persistence, self-control, curiosity, conscientiousness, grit, and self-confidence. Economists refer to these as noncognitive skills, psychologists call them personality traits, and the rest of us sometimes think of them as character.

- Paul Tough, How Children Succeed: Grit, Curiosity, and the Hidden Power of Character

Junior Counselor Program The Junior Counselor Program is for returning campers who are ready for more responsibility, more adventure, and more leadership opportunities at camp. The JC program focuses on five specific areas: leadership training, personal growth, professional certifications, service projects, and performance evaluations. JCs can expect to have a new, deeper, and more dynamic camp experience where they develop and practice skills needed as leaders while still experiencing the tradition, community, and fun they love about camp. Upon successful completion of the program, JCs will return home confident in their leadership abilities and equipped with the skills necessary to create positive change in their schools and communities.

Quick Facts Earn American Red Cross Lifeguarding, Wilderness and Remote First Aid, and CPR certifications Participate in 40 hours of community service Thorough Group and Activity Counselor training Leadership training and seminars Spend two nights in the Sierras on a JC training trip Receive JC uniform and camp name

Summer 2015 Dates JC 1: June 28 – July 25, 2015 JC 2: July 26 – August 22, 2015 (Grades 10 - 11)

Outdoor Leadership Course The Outdoor Leadership Course is a two-week program for young people interested in developing outdoor leadership skills. Trained leaders will guide OLC participants on a challenging, six-day, 30-mile backpacking trip into the High Sierras. Throughout the session, campers will develop backcountry navigational and survival skills, earn a Wilderness First Aid certification, and participate in GAC activities.

Quick Facts Instruction, leadership skill development and fun at GAC before trip departure Earn Wilderness First Aid certification Leader of the Day opportunity Learn and practice backcountry navigation and safety, outdoor cooking, ‘Leave No Trace’ principles and ethics, and wildlife biology Daily reflection, feedback and discussion

Summer 2015 Dates OLC 1: July 12 – July 25, 2015 (Grades 9 - 11)

For more information about our teen programs, please visit our website at: www.goldarrowcamp. com/teen-programs/

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I learned that friendships can be formed right away

or developed over time and both are great. My GAC friendships last forever.

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- Kate, 2014 Camper

By Christine Carter If we look back at the last two centuries of research in sociology and psychology, the single strongest finding about our well-being is that our health, happiness, and longevity are best predicted by the breadth and the depth of our positive social connections— our friendships, relationships with family members, closeness to neighbors, and perhaps whether or not we know our grocery checker’s name.

Knowing this, I’ve actively sought opportunities for my children to develop their social skills, particularly their ability to form positive social connections quickly— which Gold Arrow Camp certainly does.

Kids with many social connections are less likely to experience sadness, loneliness, low self-esteem, problems with eating and sleeping, and are more likely to experience life positively.

This means that when our kids build new relationships at camp, they often drastically improve their health and happiness.

Why? Love and the similar emotions that we experience when we feel connected socially—like affection, warmth, care, fondness, and compassion—are incredibly powerful. As Barbara Fredrickson, author of Love 2.0, writes: Love is our supreme emotion: its presence or absence in our lives influences everything we feel, think, do, and become. It’s that recurrent state that ties you in—your body and brain alike—to the social fabric, to the bodies

and brains of those in your midst.

When you experience love . . . you not only become better able to see the larger tapestry of life and better able to breathe life into the connections that matter to you, but you set yourself on a pathway that leads to more health, happiness, and wisdom.

The longest running study of human development, The Harvard Grant Study, has charted the physical and emotional health of over two hundred Harvard alumni since 1938 (which means that many of the study’s participants are pushing a hundred years— or pushing up daisies). The Grant Study makes it clear that “the most important influence, by far, on a flourishing life is love,” as one of the researchers behind the study, George Vaillant, put it in Triumphs of Experience.

Although we don’t often think about the fact that one of the greatest benefits of Gold Arrow Camp is the experience of being loved, and learning to love and care for others, that is just what is happening as our kids form deep and lasting relationships with their cabin group and counselors.

Christine Carter, Ph.D., is a parent coach and the author of RAISING HAPPINESS: 10 Simple Steps for More Joyful Kids and Happier Parents. She coaches and teaches online classes in order to help parents bring more joy into their own lives and the lives of their children, and she writes an award-winning blog for parents and couples. She is also a sociologist and happiness expert at UC Berkeley’s Greater Good Science Center. Sign up for her short weekly Happiness Tips at www.christinecarter.com.

These connections benefit kids long after camp ends. And it isn’t just that kids who are more connected are happier. They are also more successful at school, and as they get older, at work.

When college students feel a sense of belonging, their grades go up. In one study, African American college students were

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asked to read a short testimonial from older students about how they had been worried about fitting in but that things had turned out well. They then had to make a short video testimonial about their own experience of fitting in. This one simple intervention “led to an enduring improvement in GPA in nearly every semester of about 0.2 GPA units (for example, a GPA of 3.6 instead of 3.4),” writes UCLA neuroscientist Matthew Lieberman.

Later in life, practice making social connections helps kids at work. Beyond feeling a sense of belonging, an “ability to build relationships” predicts how well people do at work. This relationship capacity proved to be more highly rated than a “focus on results” in determining whether or not a manager is rated among the top 10 percent of leaders in a given company. Similarly, a person’s social skills (which are strongly related to the breadth and the depth of their

Increasing the social connections in our lives is probably the single

easiest way to enhance our well-being.

social connections) are twice as important as intelligence for predicting whether or not they will emerge as a leader when they are assigned to a random team project.

And a deep well of research shows that positive social connections protect our health. Again, according to Fredrickson: [A lack of connection] is, in fact, more damaging to your health than smoking cigarettes, drinking alcohol excessively, or being obese. Specifically, these studies tell us that people who experience more warm and caring connections with others have fewer colds, lower blood pressure, and less often succumb to heart disease and stroke, diabetes, Alzheimer’s disease, and some cancers.

As Matthew Lieberman, author of Social: Why Our Brains Are Wired to Connect, puts it: “Increasing the social connections in our lives is probably the single easiest way to enhance our well-being.” This is because what makes us human is our sociality—our

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desire for and focus on social connections, loving relationships, and warm interactions with others.

We Americans spend a lot of money and effort into helping our kids gain the skills they need to be successful. We find the best tutors and lessons and teams for our kids, so that they might get into the best schools.

Often I think we are hoping they get into the best schools, so that they get the best jobs, so that they make a lot of money. Is this because we think their lives will be happier and more meaningful the wealthier they are?

When we look at the research, however, we tend to remember what we know intuitively: We probably won’t increase our children’s well-being by investing in things that might someday help them make more money.

As parents, we do better when we teach our children how to cultivate their close connections with other people—and provide them with ample opportunities to practice making friends. When our kids’ relationships flourish, so do they.

Each summer, we select a theme to help campers and staff focus on a specific skill or character trait that will contribute to their fun, friendships, and growth. We want our campers to develop life skills at camp that benefit them long after their camp days are over. In 2012, we focused on practicing gratitude. In 2013, kindness was our focus. And our 2014 summer theme was Creating Connections.

Friendships have always been a big part of what makes campers and staff love GAC and return year after year, so this past summer we focused on one of the best aspects of camp – Creating Connections! We focused on making solid friendship connections at camp, learning and practicing social skills that make us good friends, and maintaining friendships after camp ends.

Positive relationships predict happiness better than health, economic status, education level, and other aspects of life.

Yet there is no class offered in school on how to make and keep friends, and while the skill comes naturally to some, to others creating connections is not easy. That’s where GAC comes in. Camp is all about friends, because camp is a time when kids have the opportunity to really connect, face-toface and without distractions, with other kids and young adults. Around the campfire, out on a sailboat, enjoying the sunset together during an evening canoe, and many other camp moments every day provide campers with the opportunity to really connect – without distractions, without worrying about the social strata, without feeling rushed because there’s a sports practice or meeting to get to.

Campers’ time together at camp is much more concentrated and focused than time spent with friends in between school and organized, structured sports and activities. Circled around a campfire, sharing their goals, fears, and dreams, campers get to know each other well, learn to appreciate each other’s unique qualities, and form deep bonds of friendship. In fact, many campers say their camp friends, whom they spend only two weeks with each summer, are their closest friends.

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By Audrey “Sunshine” Monke The recreational sports we teach at camp include sailing, water skiing, rock climbing, and many more fun outdoor sports. But these are not the most important skills campers learn. We view the recreational skills we instruct as a means to a much loftier goal – teaching campers important life lessons like overcoming failure, keeping a positive outlook, and persevering and practicing hard in order to acquire new skills.

As parents, I think we often get caught up in our children’s physical or academic achievements rather than focusing on the more important, over-arching character development that is simultaneously occurring while our kids work through day to day challenges and attempt new skills.

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Over my past 30 years working at camp, I’ve taught a lot of kids to water ski. In fact, my first job here was as a water skiing instructor.

Even now, my favorite summer moments are when campers get up on water skis for the first time. What I love most about teaching water skiing are the life skills I see campers learn through their water skiing experiences.

Most kids (and adults) do not master it on their first try. A common beginner error is trying to stand up too fast, rather than letting the boat pull you out of the water. This leads to a forward fall, also known as a “face plant.” A significant amount of water flushes into the nasal cavity, which is not a pleasant feeling.

I see a lot of similarities between lessons learned while attempting to water ski for the first time and qualities needed to overcome adversity and succeed in life.

In addition to water up the nose, water skiing also entails some awkward floating in the water with large wood planks attached to the feet. So, it’s understandable why many people give up on water skiing quickly and don’t ever get to the point of enjoying it. But those who stick with it despite failure often learn to love water skiing.

Lesson 1: Failure Hurts If you’ve never tried water skiing, you might not know that it is not an easy sport to learn.

As parents, I think we often get caught up in our children’s physical or academic achievements rather than focusing on the more important, over-arching character development that is simultaneously occurring while our kids work through day to day challenges and attempt new skills.

Lesson 2: Attitude Affects Everything I see such differences in the attitudes of campers (and adults) in how they approach water skiing (and maybe life). After careful analysis, I classify beginning skiers into four personality types: 1. The kids who are athletically inclined and seem to be good at everything who often get up on water skis on their first try. Usually these kids are confident and don’t hesitate to jump in the water and go. Water skiing doesn’t test their grit, but hopefully there are other camp activities that do.

2. The kids who, despite lots of encouragement and the enticement of a special water skiing patch, won’t give it a try.

Whether they just don’t like trying something new, are more comfortable sticking to what they know, or are scared of failure, it’s hard to assess. But they just won’t budge, and they won’t try water skiing.

3. The kids who are hesitant but willing to give waterskiing a try. After falling one or two times, they want to get out of the water immediately. They complain that they’re too cold, too wet, or their arms hurt. Or, the water up their nose is just too much for them. They speak negatively about themselves and the situation. While we want to encourage kids to try things and persevere here at camp, we don’t want them to feel forced, so we let them get out of the water if they don’t want to keep trying.

4. And, finally, the gritty kids: The ones for whom waterskiing does not come easily but who have a positive, determined nature and will keep on trying over and over and over (and over and over) again. These are the kids who stay positive and determined despite repeated falls. They are willing to celebrate small victories. This is a rare group and the most rewarding to work with. These are the kids with serious grit.

Lesson 3: Growth & Accomplishment Take Effort (Life requires Grit!)

Water skiing is a sport that’s not fun at first for most people. In fact, it takes most people a lot of practice and effort to get to the point where water skiing becomes really fun. Most people don’t get there, because they give up too early. But those who do keep trying often get a great reward.

Keaton’s Story Last summer I had the pleasure of teaching an amazing, gritty, category 4-attitude kid to waterski. Keaton, a five-year veteran camper, had never gotten up on water skis over his years at camp, but he decided that this was the year. He approached water skiing with an optimistic, determined attitude.

I was in the lake with Keaton, helping him get into the correct starting position, and every word that came out of his mouth was positive. When I told him what he did correctly during his last try, even though he hadn’t stayed up, he beamed. His talk to me and to himself was positive, even after he fell. Over and over again. He even smiled after a face plant.

Keaton did not get up on his first try on skis. Nor did he get up on the second, third, fourth, or fifth try. In fact, I think we were in the double digits of tries when he finally got up for a significant amount of time. But he kept a smile on his face and was determined to get up, and he succeeded.

And he skied again the next day. He’s going to keep practicing his new skill.

We’ve learned about growth vs. fixed mindsets, and Keaton demonstrated a growth mindset. Instead of telling himself he just “wasn’t a water skier” (a fixed mindset statement) because he hadn’t gotten up on water skis in the past, Keaton worked hard and learned the important lesson that if he puts his mind to something and doesn’t give up despite repeated failures, he can succeed.

I’m proud of Keaton, and I know that the grit he demonstrated will serve him well far beyond our camp lake. And I also know that the life lessons he and our other campers learn while on a tow rope behind a boat are much more important than the skill of water skiing itself.

Before I started working at camp, I wanted to be a teacher, because I wanted to make a difference in kids’ lives. But after my first summer teaching kids to water ski at camp, I realized that what I really like teaching kids is about life. And the emotional, social, and character development that we teach here at camp through our recreational activities are skills that make a life-changing impact.

After about 20 minutes and seven tries, it was time to let someone else have a turn.

Keaton had almost gotten up a few times, and one time was up briefly before he accidentally bent his arms and fell. He was even positive about giving someone else a turn and returning to the boat.

After the rest of the campers had taken their turns, I asked Keaton if he would give it one more try, using a new technique.

Even though he was still wet and a bit cold from his last try, he immediately agreed to jump back in the lake and try yet again. This time, using a special device called an Aqua Buddy, Keaton got up! He skied for a long way, and he beamed with excitement.

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By Dr. Jim “Bones” Sears One of the reasons we feel so good at camp is how we eat, or more

specifically, what we DON’T eat.

We don’t snack! We have three

moderately healthy meals complete with some fruits and veggies, but

the absence of snack in-between

meals is saving us several hundred

Dr. Jim “Bones” Sears is a pediatrician in southern California who stars on the television show “The Doctors” when he’s not sailing & mountain biking at GAC.

calories a day. And it’s not just the

moving to notice that I’m even a little

ANYTHING sounds good to eat, like

that most of the snacks at home

the moment I stop moving to sit

started using this at home. When I

calories that matter, it’s the fact

are usually junk calories like chips,

cookies, or sweets! Take these away

(along with the resulting blood sugar

spikes) and I guarantee you will start to feel better. What?! No snacks?!

It’s funny, but up at camp, I don’t

even miss it. I’m usually too busy

hungry. It’s interesting that it seems down to write an email, that’s when

I start getting the cravings to snack!

It’s really important that MOST of

the time, when you start craving a

salty or sweet snack, it’s probably

(or the kids) start wanting a cookie or chips, I point to the fruit bowl.

The rule is: if you’re still hungry

after the banana, then you can have

boredom you’re feeling and not true hunger. When you’re truly hungry,

a banana or other piece of fruit. I’ve

the (small) cookie… Most of the

time, the banana doesn’t even get finished, and the craving is gone.

Give these delicious GAC recipes a try!

Sunshine Chicken

Ingredients: Boneless, Skinless Chicken Breasts 2 tbsp Dijon mustard 1 cube butter Equal parts parmesan cheese and Italian seasoned bread crumbs (start with 1 cup each) Flour

Preparation: Melt butter, mix in Dijon mustard Combine bread crumbs and parmesan Dust chicken in flour, dip in butter mixture, coat with crumb mixture Bake at 350° for approximately 30 minutes, until golden brown and cooked to 165º internal temperature

Big Foot's Tomato Salad

Ingredients: Heirloom Tomatoes Basil Olive Oil Mozarella Cheese Balls

This salad was created using only the freshest produce from the San Joaquin Valley. Using Organic heirloom Cherry tomatoes and Basil from KMK Farms in Kingsburg, and Olive Oil from Enzo Olive Oil Company in Clovis, California.

My goal was to utilize the freshest and most local produce we could find to create the most flavorful and up to date “camp favorite” meals possible and present them in a way that was delicious and beautiful.

- Big Foot, Food Service Manager

CONTACT US:

Find out

1-800-554-2267

about

goldarrowcamp.com

our GAC

FOLLOW US:

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Join the GAC Runners!

OR PARTICIPATE IN ONE OF OUR UPCOMING EVENTS: To see the current schedule of upcoming events go to goldarrowcamp.com/ upcoming-events

Meet our Year-Round Staff

Left to right: Gumby, Monkey, Sunshine, Cappy, Bean, and Glitter Not Pictured: Chelster

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Administrative Office 644 Pollasky Ave. Suite 100 Clovis, CA 93612

HOW DO YOU GET TO CAMP? Charter buses pick up and drop off campers

at these locations on the first and last day of the camp session.

Out-of-state and international

campers fly into Fresno Yosemite Air Terminal or San Francisco Airport.