Grub N' Pub Report October 2021 by Grub and Pub Report

Ser ving g W is con sin , Min nes ot a & B e y o n d ! isc o nsin Mi nnes v ing Vo l . 1 8 /

OCTOBER 2021

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WELCOME TO OCTOBER Beware of the October Moon! Be Safe This Halloween

OCTOBER 2021

GRUB & PUB REPORT

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No. 10

GRUB & PUB REPORT PO BOX 473 CHIPPEWA Falls, WI 54729

Some Adult Content Not Intended for Children 14 and Under!

TYPO WINNER OF THE MONTH:

September 2021 Typo Contest Winner is Albina Stewers of Mineral Point, WI. She found the word (fone) instead of (Phone) in the Rookies Pub ad on page 2. She will recieve $10 in GnP Bucks! ENTER TO WIN $10 in GNP Bucks to be used at any of our current advertiser locations. Thanks for reading and Congratulations! (THESE MAY TAKE UP TO 6 WEEKS TO RECEIVE) Send entries to: Dyzzi Enterprises PO Box 473 Chippewa Falls, WI 54729 or... Call - 715-456-7518 email: dyzzi42@yahoo.com TYPO CONTEST RULES: - Only typos found in advertisements are eligible for prizes. -Typos in the articles are not part of the typo contest. -Typos in ads are the only typos considered for the contest. -Everyone who finds a typo in an advertisement whether it’s the correct typo or editorial mistake, will be entered into the contest. -You can call, e-mail or mail in your answers to the typo contest. See contact information on page three. -All guesses must be turned in by the 15th of the month. (Major Holiday months by the 13th.) -One winner will be drawn from all received answers on or about the 15th of the month. -Winners will receive a $10.00 in GnP Bucks to be used at current advertiser locations only.

OCTOBER 2021

TYPO CONTEST - CHIPPEWA FALLS PG You Gotta Try Mary’s HOT BEEFS at the .... Coldest Beer Around

WANDER INN

Quick Menu Served All Day

Happy Hr 4 - 6pm Mon - Fri

“Sonny’ Burger, Fries, Pizza & More! Cty. Rd. T & Cty Hwy X. Chippewa Falls, WI 715-874-5590

COFFEE SHOP I walked into a coffee shop on Halloween to find the woman behind the counter with a bunch of sponges pinned to her uniform. "I'm assuming this is a costume, but just what are you supposed to be?" I asked. The waitress responded proudly, "I'm self-absorbed." PUN DUN DUN On Halloween we will not pun. Instead we make candied observations.

616 N. Bridge St. Chippewa Falls, WI Fone: 715-861-5299 Happy Hour: 2-6p M-TH & ALL PACKER GAMES *Free Food during Packer Games Mon & Tues: FREE Pool (FREE Jukebox Tues.*)

Fridays & Saturdays: DJ (Karaoke on Friday Nights)

Nov 13th Dart Tourney @ Noon for Darrel & Darin’s Birthday Party Live Band – 2nd Exit 9:30PM *Minimum $500 added to Tourney October 30th: Halloween Costume Contest Party With Cash Prizes!

OPEN EARLY "I heard JC Penney was opening even earlier for Black Friday this year!" "Really, when?" .. "Halloween." HALLOWEEN FACT The origins of Halloween date back 2,000 years to the ancient Celtic festival of Samhain, which was celebrated on October 31 on the eve of their new year, according to the History Channel. The Celts believed that the dead returned to earth that night, and so they lit bonfires and donned costumes to ward off the ghosts. HALLOWEEN JOKES Q: What do you get when you divide your jack-o’-lantern’s circumference by its diameter? A: Pumpkin-pi! Q: What do ghosts wear when their eyesight gets blurred? A: Spooktacles Q: What would be the national holiday for a nation of vampires? A: Fangs-giving! Q: What’s a zombie’s favorite cereal? A: Rice Creepies. Q. “On Halloween, what is the most read part of a newspaper? A. The 'Horrorscope.'” 2

H a p p y H a l l owe e n T i m e . . D o n’ t l e t t h e c o l d s c a r e yo u ! Every month I get this magazine to print I marvel at how fast the time passes. It seems we just got into spring and then summer and now BAM! we are full blown into fall and making plans for the winter season by getting our fall cleaning and yard work done. Rushing and rushing around as there never seems to be enough time or enough of (you) to go around and accomplish all the tasks that we set for ourselves. I find this particularly true this year as I am now working a 2nd job along with producing this magazine each month just to make sure all the bills are met and we are still saving for retirement.. someday. The magazine, as many businesses, has struggled greatly this year and we are still in great hopes that many of our advertisers that have been with us for years will be back on with their advertising needs and yes dollars to help this magazine and their own businesses flourish once again. I am so very thankful for my daughter LaRaye who stepped up to the plate and is now not only delivering magazines but selling advertising, doing bookwork and finding all the content for the magazine each month while I work my second to job and help her out with ad sales and production. It is a crazy life we live these days and yes things seem to be changing fast. It seems they change even faster with each technological

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“break through” that is introduced into the world. We all seem to want the ‘good ol’ days’ and yet none of us seem ready or willing to give up the ways of today to get it back. We rush through our lives and with cell phones, internet, and even TV as advanced as it is we hear ALL the bad news from ALL OVER the world and it seems as if our world is crashing in on us. But you see all of these things you hear everyday about sickness, wars, natural disasters etc. has always been happening we just get all of the news right now (and some of that news is lies) instead of having to wait days, months and even years as they did in the ‘good ol’ days’. It is easier to prey on people with the internet and phone then ever before and criminals don’t even have to leave their house. They just put out a bunch of harmful links and hope you click on it and infect all of your electronic devices. It saddens me really. If these people would use half of their energy doing good in this world instead of evil we would have a better world. But it needs to start with each of us! So if you would like a bit of the ‘good ol’ days’, just shut off your phone, computer and TV a couple of times a week and go sit outside and enjoy some air. There are many bars and restaurants now that have open, outdoor seating to enjoy this fall or just go out into your own back yard or porch and just be. I wish you a happy and safe Halloween. Be well won’t you and be a person that makes the world a good place to live.

TABLE OF C ONTENTS COVER STORY :.... N/A GAME PAGES Crossword ......................... Pg.6 Word Search..................... Pg. 28 .Curvy Word Puzzle............Pg. NA Kazuko ......................... ....Pg. NA .Sodoku Hard only...............Pg. 11 Games Answers...........Pg.29930 Answers TYPO Contest : Rules & Winners ...........Pg. 2 Directory of Advertisers ..........Pg 15 Maps of Advertisers ..Pg. 16-17 Classified Section .......Pg.NA Subscription Request...... Pg 32 ENTERTAINMENT CALENDAR

Pg. 31 Submit Jokes, Letters, Subscription or Advertising Requests To:

GNP REPORT P.O. B ox 447 73 Chippewa Falls, WI 54729 See the GnP Report Online @ www.gnpreport.com

SAL ES & S E T U P

Call LaRaye Sly State & National Sales Representative Assistant @ 715 379 1179 laraye_05@yahoo.com

Dyzzi *Donna Johnson (Owner) 715945697518 dyzzi42@yahoo.com

Menomonie 9 Downing, Osseo, Arcadia 9 Strum, Melrose, Mindoro, Owen, Withee, Neillsville, Pray, Granton, Black River Falls Chippewa Falls & the St. Croix Valley

AREA SALES REPRESENTATIVES: Keith Ewing 9 7159 40490885 (Bloomer 9 Trego 9 Hayward) Dan Callan 9 715949598091 (Eau Claire 9 Roberts) 3

C H I P P E W A FA L L S PAG E Phone: 715-723-7822

29 E. Park Ave. Chippewa Falls, WI NEW HOURS: Mon - Fri 8 a. m. - CL Sa & Su 11 a. m. - CL Happy Hour: M-F 8am -10am & 3 pm - 6pm Q: What did the fisherman say on Halloween? A: Trick or trout.

Lake Hallie Sportsman’s Club

JOIN US FOR... Oct 2: Jim Schu 4-7pm Oct 9: 2 Broke Dudes 4 -7pm Oct 30: Halloween Party w/1st-3rd Place Prizes *Music By: Black Sheep Duo 7-10pm PACKER GAME SPECIALS *Touchdown Shots & Food at halftime! FREE JUKE BOX - Thursdays HAPPY HOUR MON -FRI 4:30-6:30PM

Saturday Buckets of Beer 5 for $11 Sunday $3 Bloody Mary’s 10a -2p MONDAY NIGHT DRAWING 6:30p FISHING CONTESTS EVERY TUESDAY 6-9pm / *Sign up before 6pm *Meat Raffle - Noon Till Gone WHEEL WEDNESDAY *Call or stop in for details Spin 7p MEN’S AND LADIES NIGHTS: Monday Men’s / Thursday Ladies (50 Cents off drinks your night) NEW:T-shirts, tanks, sweatshirts & 16 oz. can koozies

2910 109th St. Chippewa Falls 715-726-1050

OCTOBER 2021

10 HALLOWEEN FACTS 1. "Jack o'lantern" comes from the Irish legend of Stingy Jack. Legend has it that Stingy Jack invited the devil to have a drink with him, but Jack didn't want to pay for the drink, so he convinced the devil to turn himself into a coin. Instead of buying the drink, he pocketed the coin and kept it close to a silver cross in his house, preventing the devil from taking shape again. He promised to let the devil go as long as he would leave Jack alone for a year – and that if Jack died, the devil wouldn't claim his soul. After a year, Jack tricked the devil again to leave him alone and not

People in Ireland and Scotland began creating their own creations of Jack's lanterns out of turnips, beets and potatoes. The tradition traveled to the United States along with the immigrants and people began to use pumpkins, native to North America, for the lanterns instead. 2. Candy corn was originally called Chicken Feed Though many would argue that candy corn tastes like chicken feed, that's not how it got its original name. Created in the 1880s by George Renninger, it was sold to the masses by Goelitz Confectionery Company (now Jelly Belly Co.) at the turn of the century. Because corn is what w a s Open 365 Days used a Year! *We NEVER to feed Close Early!

chickens. The

OCTOBER 30TH: creation was called Halloween Costume "Chicken Feed" and the box was MENU: marked a colorful 8pm rooster. Party with & Contest New Surf & Turf Menu 3.*Judging Trick-or-treating comes from at 11pm Fridays Only 5-9pm "souling" Fun and Prizes! Breakfast Served 8am – Noon Having children dress up in claim his soul. When Jack died, costumes and go door-to-door like TOURNAMENTS & ENTERTAINMENT God didn't want such a conniving little beggars demanding treats is Dart Tourneys: Wed 7p In House *Open Spots person in heaven and the devil, true kind of weird. Like several other Tuesday Virtual 7pm Halloween *Open Spots Available to his word, wouldNight not allow him activities, the tradition DJ Trivia Every Thursday @ 7pm into hell. can be traced back to the Middle Keep Watch On Facebook For Opening Jack was sent off into the night AgesOur and Grand the rituals of Samhain. with only a burning coal to light his It was believed that phantoms JOIN US AT THE POURHOUSE FOR FUN, FOOD & DRINKS path. He placed the coal inside a walked the earth on the night of Like us on FB Phone: 715-917-1020 carved-out turnip and has been Samhain, so people would dress up Address: Menomonie St. Hwy 12 Elk roaming the earthW301 ever since. in/costumes in anMound, effort toWI repel the 4

L A K E H A L L I E PAG E spirits. As the Catholic Church started supplanting pagan festivals with their own holidays (like All Souls' Day), the act of souling became popular, and poor children and adults would go door-to-door dressed as spirits accepting food in exchange for prayers. (cont’d pg 8) HALLOWEEN JOKES Q: Why is a cemetery a great place to write a story? A: Because there are so many plots there! Q: Why do Jack-o-lanterns have wicked smiles? A: Because they just had their brains scooped out! Q: Where is the best place to party on Halloween? A: The g-RAVE-yard. Q: Why do ghosts like to hang out at bars? A: Because of all the Boos. Q: Who won the skeleton beauty contest? A: No body. KISSING A MODEL The artist tried to concentrate on his work, but the attraction he felt for his model finally became irresistible. He threw down his palette, took her in his arms and kissed her. She pushed him away. "Maybe your other models let you kiss them, buy I won’t" she said. "I've never tried to kiss a model before," he swore.

OCTOBER 2021

"Really?" she said, softening, "How many models have there been?" "Four," he replied, "A jug, two apples, and a vase." JOLTED AGAIN A funeral service is being held for a woman who has just passed away. At the end of the service the pall bearers are carrying the casket out when they accidentally bump into a wall, jarring the casket. They hear a faint moan. They open the casket to find that the woman is actually alive. She lives for ten more years and then dies. A ceremony is again held at the same church and at the end of the ceremony the pall bearers are again carrying out the casket. As they are walking the husband cries out, "WATCH OUT FOR THE WALL" MILKING THE COW A farmer was milking his cow. He was just starting to get a good rhythm going when a bug flew into the barn and started circling his head. Suddenly, the bug flew into the cow's ear. The farmer didn't think much about it until the bug squirted out into his bucket. It went in one ear and out the udder. WORDS OF WISDOM -The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese. -Support bacteria. They're the only

2588 Business Hwy 53 Lake Hallie, WI 715-723-0172 OPEN TO THE PUBLIC KITCHEN OPEN DAILY 11a - 2p & 4p - 9p DAILY FOOD SPECIALS,

Monday:2 for 1 burgers (starting at $8.99)

Taco Tuesday Wing Wednesday Thursday $5.99 pizza (dine in only)

Friday night fish fry DAILY DRINK SPECIALS: Mug Monday Tapper and Tequila Tuesday Wine and Whiskey Wednesday Thirsty Thursday ($2.00 rail mixers) Friday all day happy hour Saturday $2.75 Captain Morgan Sunday $3.25 Bloody Mary and $2.00 mimosas

JOIN US FOR.. KARAOKE SUNDAYS 5PM JOIN US FOR..

Packer Games This fall & winter

Check out our Facebook page for other events this October! 5

Cross Word Puzzle

(Answers page 30)

T I L D E N PAG E

DAILY DRINK & FOOD SPECIAL NEW HOURS: MON 4PM - CL TUES - SUN 11AM - CL Halfway Between Hwy 124 & 53

Hwy B Tilden, WI 715-288-6303

Closed 4th of July

WHAT ROCKS A rabbi, a Unitarian Universalist minister, and a Wiccan priestess decided to go on a fishing trip together. They went down to their local lake, rented a boat, and went out on to the lake for a day of fishing. As the afternoon approached, the trio got hungry—and realized that they left their lunches on the shore of the lake. The minister got out of the boat, walked across the lake, got his lunch, walked back, and sat down to eat his lunch. "You should have gotten all of our lunches!" scolded the priestess. She then got up, walked across the lake, picked up her lunch as well as the rabbi's, walked back across the lake, and sat down, handing the rabbi his afternoon meal. The rabbi at this point is almost out of his mind, his eyes wide with shock. He manages to sputter, "Wha... what... how did you...?" The minister grins at the priestess, nudges her, and asks "Do you think we should tell him about the rocks?"

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CHIPPEWA LAKE HALLIE PAGE The priestess looks at the minister, raises an eyebrow, and replies "What rocks?" NEW SEAT Charlie's wife, Lucy, had been after him for several weeks to paint the seat on their toilet. Finally, he got around to doing it while Lucy was out. After finishing, he left to take care of another matter before she returned. She came in and undressed to take a shower. Before getting in the shower, she sat on the toilet. As she tried to stand up, she realized that the not-quite-dry epoxy paint had glued her to the toilet seat. About that time, Charlie got home and realized her predicament. They both pushed and pulled without any success whatsoever. Finally, in desperation, Charlie undid the toilet seat bolts. Lucy wrapped a sheet around herself and Charlie drove her to the hospital emergency room. The ER Doctor got her into a position where he could study how to free her. Lucy tried to lighten the embarrassment of it all by saying, "Well, Doctor, I'll bet you've never seen anything like this before." The Doctor replied, "Actually, I've seen lots of them. I just never saw one mounted and framed." SODIUM HYPOBROMITE Science teacher: "Does anyone here know what sodium hypobromite is?" Student: "NaBrO!"

OCTOBER 2021

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10327 County Hwy X, Chippewa Falls, WI 54729 HALLOWEEN JOKES Q: What can you say about a horrible mummy joke? A: It Sphinx! Q: Where do ghosts go on holidays?

A: The Boohamas. Q: What goes around a haunted house and never stops? A: A fence. WATCH OUT FOR KIDS!

S L I M ’ S Lake Hallie TAVERN 1979 Cty Hwy OO Chippewa Falls, WI 715-832-9303

OPEN 7am-CL EVERY DAY! Daily Food Drink En&jo y.. Specials Good S**Get piriYour ts, FLunch ood/Dinner & FuPunch n! Card! BREAKFAST AVAILABLE EVERY DAY! MON: Hot Beef Sandwich w/ chips or Hot Beef Plate

***Starting on Mondays NEW Queen of hearts drink specials!!!

*TUES: TACOS w/ Potato Rounds *WED: Broasted JUMBO Chicken Wings & Chicken Paddle Wings w/ Choice of Sauce Meat Raffles Special: $1.50 *Dom Beers & $2 rails FRI: WALLEYE or PERCH Fish Dinner

‘Check Out Our NEW COOK.. Rich!’ KARAOKE every Thurs. & Sat. Pool Tournaments Every Other Saturday!

Packer & Brewer Game Specials Annual Halloween Costume Contest! 7

A LT O O N A CHIPPEWA E AU C L A I R E PAG E

COUPON SPECIAL... $5 OFF SCHEDULED SESSION (Limit 1 per person - Good Thru August 30, 2021) 10327 County Hwy X, Chippewa Falls, WI 54729 Q: Who do monsters buy 10 HALLOWEEN FACTS cookies from? (cont’d from pg 4) A: Ghoul scouts. 4. The most lit jack o' lanterns on display is 30,581 According to Guinness World Records, the highest number of lit jack o'lanterns on display is 30,581 by the City of Keene, New Hampshire in 2013. Keene, represented by Let it Shine, has broken the record 8 times over since the original attempt. That's a whole lot of pumpkins! New Every Tuesday: Open Mic 7-11pm 5. Halloween folklore is full of w/Cereral Skillet Sing w/Band or Solo fortune-telling and magic Old English folklore about Halloween is full of superstition and fortune-telling that still lingers today, like bobbing for apples or avoiding black cats. One piece of folklore says that if a young unmarried person walks down the stairs backwards at midnight while holding a mirror, the face that appears in the mirror will be their next lover. Open Jam.. Wednesdays 6. Day of the Dead should really OPEN @ 10am 7 Days A Week! be called Days of the Dead 228 Division St. Altoona, WI The Day of the Dead, or Dia de los 715-552-5526 Muertos, takes place October 31 Daily Lunch Specials 10-4 through November 2 in Mexico and a few other Hispanic countries. NIGHTLY DRINK SPECIALS November 1st, Dia de los Happy Hour: Inocentes, honors children that M-F 10a-6p & Sat 3-6pm

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died, and family members decorate graves with baby's breath and white orchids. On November 2nd, Dia de los Muertos, families honor adults who have died and place orange marigolds on grave sites. The original Aztec celebration actually lasted a month long, but when Spanish conquistadors came over to Mexico in the 16th century, they merged the festival with the Catholic All Saints' Day. Today's celebration is a mix of both Aztec rituals of skulls, altars to the dead and food with Catholic masses and prayers. 7. Michael Myers' mask is actually a William Shatner mask. The classic 1978 horror film "Halloween" can be easily recognized in just one image: the psychotic Michael Myers in his iconic pale-faced mask. Without a doubt, it's one chilling look that has struck terror into the hearts of

Rolly’s

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E AU C L A I R E PAG E partying teens in slasher flicks. The movie was actually filmed on such a tight budget that the crew used the cheapest mask they could find: a $2 Star Trek Captain James Kirk mask. They spray painted it white and reshaped the eye holes, making William Shatner look incredibly creepy. WHY GOD CREATED EVE 10. God was worried that Adam would frequently become lost in the Garden. 9. God knew that one day Adam would require someone to locate and hand him the remote. (Which is actually funny because as most know women don’t get the remote often and didn’t put it down to be lost in the first lace.) 8. God knew Adam would never go out and buy himself a new fig leaf when his wore out and would therefore need Eve to buy one for him. 7. God knew Adam would never be able to make a doctor's, dentist, or haircut appointment for himself. 6. God knew Adam would never remember which night to put the garbage on the curb. 5. God knew if the world was to be populated, men would never be able to handle the pain and discomfort of childbearing. 4. As the Keeper of the Garden, Adam would never remember where he left his tools. 3. Apparently, Adam needed someone to blame his troubles on when God caught him hiding in the garden. 2. As the Bible says, It is not good

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for man to be alone! And finally, the Number 1 reason why God created Eve... 1. When God finished the creation of Adam, He stepped back, scratched his head, and said, "I can do better than that."

OPEN: Mon: Fri 11am - 2am Sat: 10am - 2am Phone: (715) 832-7798

BAD HOME The Top Signs You're In A Bad Nursing Home Its named Heaven's Waiting Room. Cheap TV antenna can't pick up Xena: Warrior Princess. Defibrilator doubles as a remote control. No furniture in it outside of beds and lots of caskets.

131 N Barstow St, Eau Claire, WI 54703 Radio stations alternate between Glenn Miller and broadcasting Last Rites in every language known to man. You can't ring a nurse but you can page the attorney's office down the hall. Rectal thermometers made of wood. Two words: Community Bedpan.

VFW POST 7232 2900 W. Folsom St. Eau Claire, WI (715) 832- 3528 *Open To Public Facebook.com/VFW Post 7232 Folsom Street HAPPY HOUR: MONDAY - FRIDAY 4 - 6PM

DINE IN OR CARRY OUT SERVING FOOD FROM 7AM TO 8PM * 7 DAYS A WEEK

FRIDAY FISH FRY Choice of Perch,Walleye, Cod, Shrimp or Chicken strips, Cheesy hashbrown, Baked potato, Joe-jo, French fries, Coleslaw, Cottage cheese

SERVING.. BREAKFAST LUNCH & DINNER Kitchen Open 7am-8pm

AUXILIARY BREAKFAST IS BACK! 1st Sunday Monthly Oct - Mar 8am-11:30am Seniors $8 / Adults $9 *Under 5 yrs eat free! 9

EAU CLAIRE PAGE

What do you call a vampire that lives in a kitchen? A: Count Spatula.

BAD LUCK A lady is having a bad day at the table in Monte Carlo. Down to her last £100, completely exasperated, she cries, "What rotten luck! What in the world should I do now?" A gent next to her, trying to calm her down a bit, calmly suggests, "I don't know... Why don't you play your age?" He walks away. Moments later, he is intrigued to hear a great commotion at the roulette table. Maybe, she won! Rushing back to the table and pushing his way through the crowd, he is stunned to see the lady lying limp on the floor, with the table operator kneeling over her. He asks, "What happened? Is she

VFW POST 305

1300 Starr Ave. Eau Claire, WI 715-552-8438 Breakfast: 7a - 11a / Lunch: Mon - Fri 11a-1p Daily Drink Specials & Happy Hour: Mon - Fri: 7a-10a & 3-6p

OPEN 7 DAYS A WEEK

Tues. Burger Night - 2 for $12 from 3p-7p Wed. Wing Night - a pound of wings & pint of beer for $10 3p-7p Every Thurs. Chef's Special Friday Fish Fry 5p - 8p 2 pieces of fish, choice of potato, & cole slaw or cottage cheese for $9.00 (Fish can be substituted for 10 pieces of Shrimp) OCTOBER ENTERTAINMENT: Friday: Karaoke 9p - 1a Sundays: Oldies Show @2:30p - 6:30p SAT Oct 2 - Rock-a-Billy Riot SAT Oct 9 - Ember SAT Oct 16 - Lassos & Lace / SAT Oct 23 - Austin Fire SAT Oct 30 - Rock-a-Billy Riot

all right?" "I don't know, she put everything on number 24 and when 36 came up, she screamed and then fainted." ALCOHOL WARNINGS The Toronto Board of Health has proposed that warning signs be placed on all alcohol bottles to tip off drinkers about the possible peril of drinking a pint or two of any alcoholic beverage. 1. WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may cause you to wake up with a breath that could knock a buzzard off a wreaking dead animal that is one hundred yards away. 2. WARNING: Consumption of alcohol is a major factor in dancing like an idiot. 3. WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may cause you to tell the same boring story over and over again until your friends want to assault you 4. WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may cause you to thay shings like thish. 5. WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may cause you to tell the boss what you really think of him. 6. WARNING: Consumption of alcohol is the leading cause of inexplicable rug burn on the forehead. 7. WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may create the illusion that you are tougher, handsomer and smarter than some really, really big guy named Psycho Bob. A GHOST JOKE Q. What do ghosts eat for dinner? A. Ghoulash!

Packer & Badger Game Special $2.00 Dom. Bottles OCTOBER 2021

E AU C L A I R E PAG E CANNIBAL JOKES Q. What happened if you upset a cannibal? A. You get into hot water! Q. Why don't cannibals like to eat Carl Lewis? A. He gives them runs! CHURCH MEMBERS Three couples went in to see the minister about becoming new members of his church. The minister said that they would have to go without sex for two weeks and then come back and tell him how it went. The first couple was retired, the second couple was middle aged and the third couple was newly married. Two weeks went by, and the couples returned to the minister. The retired couple said it was no problem at all. The middle-aged couple said it was tough for the first week, but after that it was no problem. The newlyweds said it was fine until she dropped the can of paint. "Can of PAINT!" exclaimed the minister. "Yeah," said the newlywed man. "She dropped the can and when she bent over to pick it up, I had to have her right there and then. Lust took over." The minister just shook his head and said that they were not welcome in the church. "That's okay," said the man. "We're not welcome in Home Depot , Menards, Walmart, Fleet Farm or Farm and Fleet either."

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GIROLAMO’S S COURT’n n HOUSE HOURS:

Mon - Wed: 10am-10pm / Thurs & Fri: 10am-12am / Sat:11am-12am Sun Open... 1 hour before Packer Games times until 9pm PACKER GAME DAY SPECIALS: Touch downs: Jello Shots and Discount Drink Tickets (good on rail and tap beer) Plus.. Stop in and enjoy our.. Late Night HAPPY HOUR Mon - Sat 113 W. Grand Ave. Eau Claire, WI 715-832-5478 RHYME TIME You pick a phrase, you pick a rhyme... Repeat the sound another time... Five lambs and then an extra beat will do ya... Another rhyme, a rising note, congratulations, you just wrote, another enlightening verse to Hallelujah!

GHOST JOKES Q. What do ghouls do when they're in hospital? A. They talk about their apparitions! Q. What did the polite ghost say to her son? A. Don't spook until your spooken to!

Open at 5am 365 Days A Year!

WELCOME HUNTERS Serving Breakfast, Lunch, & Dinner every day Our Historic "Orton Room" is available for private events....call for details! Deck overlooking the scenic Chippewa River! 318 W. Main St. Durand, WI (715)672-8874

FOSTER BAR Open Daily 11am to 2am WE'VE BEEN HERE SINCE 1976! Homemade Pizzas Fresh 1/3# Burgers Cheese Curds Happy Hour: 3:30pm to 6:30pm 0 US S HWY Y 53 3 S12800 Foster,, Wisconsin n 54758 8 Phonee (715)) 597-6627 *Juke Box 4-6pm *Sunday Pull Tab Drawing *Drink Specials during Wisconsin and Green Bay games October Monthly Fundraiser: Breast Cancer SUN October 17th Dart Tourney starting at noon 50/50 & Meat Raffles all day (Free will) food starting at 1pm Sunday: Pull tab drawing 5p $2 Beers for Packer /Badger games 715-639-5000 109 N. Main St. Elmwood, WI

OCTOBER 2021

EAU CLAIRE - ELMWOOD - SPRING VALLEY PG 10 HALLOWEEN FACTS (cont’d from pg 8) 8. Halloween originated from an ancient Celtic festival The Halloween we know today can trace its roots back to the ancient Celtic end-of-harvest festival of Samhain. During Samhain, people would light bonfires and wear costumes to ward off evil spirits. In the eighth century, in an effort to spread Christianity, Pope Gregory III decreed November 1 as All Saints' Day and incorporated some of the rituals of Samhain. All Saints' Day was also called All Hallows and the night before, when the traditional Samhain festival used to take place in Celtic regions, was called All Hallows' Eve. 9. Des Moines has a hilarious tradition called Beggars' Night The night before Halloween, young children in Des Moines hit the streets for Beggars' Night. According to an article, the event began around 1938 as a way to prevent vandalism and give younger children a safer way to enjoy Halloween. Beggars' Night is very similar to regular trick-or-treating, except kids are required to tell a joke, poem or perform a "trick" for a treat. The best part? The jokes are notoriously groan-worthy like, "If April showers bring May flowers, what do May flowers bring?" "Pilgrims." Get your best dad jokes ready! 10. The White House is haunted The United States' most famous address has had several reports of ghostly appearances and eerie

sounds – and that's not even including election years! The most common ghost sighting is of Abraham Lincoln who has been spotted by First Lady Eleanor Roosevelt, Queen Wilhelmina of the Netherlands and Sir Winston Churchill. Other paranormal guests include Andrew Jackson, David Burns and Abigail Adams. SOURCE: https://www.10best.com /inter ests/festivals-events/10-funfacts-you-didnt-know-about-halloween/ SUITABLE PASTOR Dear Member, we do not have a happy report, as we have not been able to find a suitable candidate for pastor of our church thus far. We do, however, have one promising prospect. The following is our confidential report on the candidates: Adam: Good man but has problems with his wife. Noah: Former pastorate of 120 years with no converts. Prone to unrealistic building projects. Joseph: A big thinker, but a braggart. Interprets dreams. Has a prison record. Moses: Modest and meek, but poor communicator; even stutters at times. Sometimes blows his stack and acts rashly in business meetings. Deborah: One word—female. David: The most promising candidate of all, until we discovered the affair he had with a neighbor’s wife. Solomon: Great preacher, but serious woman problems. Elijah: Prone to depression; 12

collapses under pressure. Jonah: Told us he was swallowed by a huge fish. He said the fish later spit him out on the shore near here. We hung up. Amos: Backward and unpolished. With some seminary training, he might have promise; but he has a problem with wealthy people. John: Says he’s a Baptist but doesn’t dress like one. Sleeps in the outdoors, has a weird diet, and provokes denominational leaders. Paul: Powerful CEO type and fascinating preacher. But he’s short on tact, unforgiving with young ministers, harsh, and has been known to preach all night. Timothy: Too young. Judas: His references are solid. A steady plodder. Conservative. Good connections. Knows how to handle money. We’re inviting him to preach this Sunday with great hopes that he will accept our offer! ED ZACHARY A woman was very distraught at the fact that she had not had a date or any sex in quite some time. She was afraid she might have something wrong with her, so she decided to employ the medical expertise of a sex therapist. Her doctor recommended that she go and see Dr Chang, the well-known sex therapist. So she

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went to see him and upon entering the examination room, Dr Chang said, 'OK, take off all you crose.' So she did. Dr Chang then said, 'Ok now, crawl reery fass to the other side of the room.' So she did. Dr Chang then said, 'OK' now crawl reery fass to me,' So she did. Dr Chang slowly shook his head and said, 'Your problem vewy bad, you haf Ed Zachary Disease, worse case I ever see, that why you not haf sex or dates.' Confused the woman asked, 'What is Ed Zachary Disease?' Dr Chang replied, 'It when your face rook Ed Zachary rike your arse. VAMPIRE JOKE Q. What do vampires think of blood transfusions? A. Newfangled rubbish!

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vampires live on? A: The dead end. HALLOWEEN JOKES Q: Where does Count Dracula usually eat his lunch? A: At the casketeria. GHOST JOKE Q. How do undertakers speak? A. Gravely! Plan to be spontaneous tomorrow.

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B LO O M E R - L A S V E G A S PAG E SARCASTIC REMARKS And your crybaby whinny opinion would be...? This isn't an office. It's Hell with fluorescent lighting. I started out with nothing and still have most of it left. I pretend to work. They pretend to pay me. Sarcasm is just one more service we offer. If I throw a stick, will you leave? If I want to hear the pitter patter of little feet, I'll put shoes on my cats. Does your train of thought have a caboose? Errors have been made. Others will be blamed. A PBS mind in an MTV world. Whatever kind of look you were going for, you missed. Suburbia: where they tear out the trees and then name streets after them. Well, this day was a total waste of makeup. See no evil, hear no evil, date no evil. Not all men are annoying. Some are dead. A woman's favorite position is

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10505 Co. Rd SS Bloomer, WI GPS & Variable Rate Available Owned by: Charles W. Rufledt Phone: 715-568-4643 Fax: 715-568-5643 CEO. I'm trying to imagine you with a personality. A cubicle is just a padded cell without a door. Stress is when you wake up screaming and you realize you haven't fallen asleep yet. Can I trade this job for what's behind door number 1? I thought I wanted a career, turns out I just wanted paychecks. Too many freaks, not enough circuses. Macho Law prohibits me from admitting I'm wrong. Nice perfume. Must you marinate in it? Chaos, panic, and disorder - my work here is done. I plead contemporary insanity. How do I set a laser printer to stun? Meandering to a different drummer. I majored in liberal arts. Will that be for here or to go? HALLOWEEN SAFETY Check ALL of your kids candy before they consume it. If any package is torn.. throw it out!

OCTOBER 2021

ADVERTISER MAP DIRECTORY (Map on Pages 16 & 17) MAP PG # , AREA, ADVERTISER NAME CHIPPEWA FALLS 1 7 9 12 14 16 20

AD PG #

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504 N CTY HWY F - BIRCHWOOD, WI 715-354-7877 www.birchwoodamericanlegionpost379.org N705 COUNTY RD M, COUNTY ROAD D, SARONA, WI (715) 354-3250 2091 22 1/2 AVE., RICE LAKE, WI (715) 475-1300 2883 17-3/4TH ST., RICE LAKE, WI (715) 234-7339 www.shadyrest@centurytel.net N1075 EAST SIDE RD., BIRCHWOOD, WI (715) 354-3533 www.lincolnwoodresort.com MAIN ST., BRILL, WI (715) 234-1823

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Durand

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170

Augusta

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3rd Ave.

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Curtiss

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Blair

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Reedsburg

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Black River Falls

Melrose

Alma Center

Fairchild

155

Northfield

Pigeon Falls

Jim Falls

Osseo

178

Tony

Cornell

Ladysmith

Ettrick

Mindoro

124

Riplinger

40th Ave.

Loyal

Greenwood

Bruce

Withee

Bloomer

Neillsville Boon Blvd. 2

23 Ave. Grand 19 l Ave Centra Chippewa Falls

Osseo

Merrillan

Thorp

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Humbird

Independence

Fairchild

Rock Dam

Arcadia

Stanley

Colfax

Dallas

Menomonie 22 25

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Tilden 100th Ave.

Wilson

Do wn

Glenwood City

Cadott

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Rice Lake 25

Chetek Barron Cameron 53

Spooner

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Pray Rd.

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WI Dells Broadway

Pray

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Mondovi

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30th Ave

Golf Rd.

Eau Claire

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312 Bypass

Melby St.

Sheldon

Gilman

Hudson

Augusta

Bayport

Fall Creek

Wabasha, MN

27 Holcombe

Conrath

Houlton

Ladysmith

5 Spooner Ave.

Lake Hallie

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ve. th A

100th Ave.

Spring Valley

Hudson

Fall Creek

Hammond Woodville Hersey

Ellsworth

Bayport, MN

Jim Falls

Webb Lake

250th St.

130

90th St.

Rudolph Rd.

Pearl St

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Can al S t. Park Ave.

109th St.

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270

BEANS One of the matrons of the church was cooking a pot of her famous beans for the church potluck, and her son, Little Johnny, came running through the house, BB gun in one hand, and a handful of BBs in the other. He tripped and the BBs, naturally, went right into the pot of beans. Thinking it over, Little Johnny could think of no reason why he should risk punishment, so he said nothing. The dinner went well, and, as usual, the beans were one of the favorite dishes. The next day, the church secretary, Mary, called Little Johnny's mother and said, "Jane, your beans were delicious as usual, but what did you put in them this time?" Jane replied, "Nothing new, why do you ask?" "Well," said Mary, "this morning I bent over to feed the cat, and shot the canary." ANSWERING MACHINE MESSAGE "Camptown Races: I can't come to the telephone; doo-dah, doo-dah. Leave your message when you hear the tone; oh, de doo-dah day. Might be gone all night... Might be gone all day... So leave a message when you hear the tone. I'll call you back someday... doo-dah, doo day okay.”

BRILL - RICE LAKE - SARONA PAGE CHURCH CAKE Have you ever told a white lie? You are going to love this especially all the ladies who bake for church events Alice was to bake a cake for the church ladies' group bake sale, but she forgot to do it until the last minute. She baked an angel food cake and when she took it from the oven, the center had dropped flat. She said, “Oh dear, there's no time to bake another cake.” So, she looked around the house for something to build up the center of the cake. Alice found it in the bathroom … a roll of toilet paper. She plunked it in and covered it with icing. The finished product looked beautiful, so she rushed it to the church. Before she left the house, Alice had given her daughter some money and specific instructions to be at the bake sale the minute it opened, and to buy that cake and bring it home. When the daughter arrived at the sale, the attractive cake had already been sold. Alice was beside herself. The next day, Alice was invited to a friend's home where two tables of bridge were to be played that afternoon. OPEN DAILY @ 10am SERVING FOOD DAILY 10A-10P

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After the game, a fancy lunch was served, and to top it off, the cake in question was presented for dessert. Alice saw the cake, she started to get out of her chair to rush into the kitchen to tell her hostess all about it, but before she could get to her feet, one of the other ladies said, “What a beautiful cake!” Alice sat back in her chair when she heard the hostess (who was a prominent church member) say, “Thank you, I baked it myself.” NAME THE STATES Mr. Jones, the elementary school principal, made it a practice to visit the classes from time to time. One day he walked into Miss Sandy Smith's 4th grade class, where the children were studying American History. Mr. Jones asked the class how many states they could name. They came up with about 40 names. Miss Sandy Smith came up with four more. Not impressed, Mr. Jones told them that in his day students knew the names of all the states. From the back of the room Little Johnny yelled, "Yeah, but in those

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B I RC H WO O D - L I N C O L N WO O D - R I C E L A K E PAG E days, there were only 13!" TESTICLE THERAPY Two women were playing golf. One teed off and watched in horror as her ball headed directly toward a foursome of men playing the next hole. The ball hit one of the men. He immediately clasped his hands together at his groin, fell to the ground and proceeded to roll around in agony. The woman rushed down to the man, and immediately began to apologize. 'Please allow me to help. I'm a Physical Therapist and I know I could relieve your pain if you'd allow me.” she told him. 'Oh, no, I'll be all right. I'll be fine in a few minutes,' the man replied. He was in obvious agony, lying in the fetal position, still clasping his hands there at his groin. At her persistence, however, he finally allowed her to help. She gently took his hands away and laid them to the side, loosened his pants and put her hands inside.. She administered a tender and artful massage for several long

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504 N County Hwy F - Birchwood, WI Phone: 715-354-7877 www.birchwoodamericanlegionpost379.org moments and asked, 'How does that feel'? Feels great, he replied; but I still think my thumb's broken! HOW GOOD WAS I A guy meets a girl out at a nightclub and she invites him back to her place for the night, her parents are out of town and this is the perfect opportunity. They get back to her house and they go into her bedroom, and when the guy walks in the door he notices all these fluffy toys. There's hundreds of them, fluffy toys on top of the wardrobe, fluffy toys on the bookshelf and window sill, there's more on the floor, and of course fluffy toys all over the bed. Later, after they've had sex, he turns to her and asks, "So, how was I?" She says, "Well, you can take anything from the bottom shelf."

CHURCH BULLETIN BLOOPERS The Associate Minister unveiled the church's new tithing campaign slogan last Sunday: "I Upped My Pledge - Up Yours." -Our next song is "Angels We Have Heard Get High." -Don't let worry kill you, let the church help. -For those of you who have children and don't know it, we have a nursery downstairs. -This being Easter Sunday, we will ask Mrs. Lewis to come forward and lay an egg on the altar. EYE GLASS CONFESSIONS As the three ladies picked up a menu, each put on a pair of glasses. "I really only need mine for close reading," explained the first. Remarked the second, "I only use mine when the light is bad." The third confessed, "I rarely wear mine - except when I want to see."

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PIPE ORGAN A local church built a new sanctuary. They moved their very fine old pipe organ to the new sanctuary. It was an intricate task that was completed successfully. The local news heralded, "St. Paul Completes Organ Transplant."

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OCTOBER 2021

PHYSICAL EXAM The doctor has just finished giving the young man a thorough physical examination. "The best thing for you to do," the M.D. said, "is give up drinking and smoking, get to bed early and stay away from women." "Doc, I don't deserve the best," said the patient. "What's second best?" SEND THE WINE BACK A man enters his favorite ritzy restaurant, and while sitting at his regular table, he notices a gorgeous woman sitting at a table nearby all alone. He calls the waiter over and asks for their most expensive bottle of Merlot to be sent over to her, knowing that if she accepts it, she is his for the night. The waiter gets the bottle and quickly sends it over to the girl, saying it is from the gentleman at a nearby table. She looks at the the man, then at the wine and decides to send a note over to the man. The note read: "For me to accept this bottle, you need to have a Mercedes in your garage, a million dollars in the bank, and seven inches in your pants." The man, after reading this note, sends another note to her. It read: "Just so you will know, I happen to have a Ferrari Testarosa, a BMW 850iL, and a Mercedes 560SEL in my garage, plus I have over twentymillion dollars in the bank. But, not even for a woman beautiful as you, would I cut three inches off my dick. Just send the wine back."

UNHEAVENLY BLESSED Three nuns were talking. The first nun said, "I was cleaning the Father’s room the other day and do you know what I found? A bunch of pornographic magazines!" "What did you do?" the other nuns asked. "Well, of course I threw them in the trash." The second nun said, " Well, I can top that, I was in Father's room putting away the laundry and I found a bunch of condoms!" "Oh my!" gasped the other nuns. "What did you do?" they asked. "I poked holes in all of them," she replied. The third nun said, "Oh shit!" IRISH HUMOR This is a true story of the late Irish author Brendan Behan who one night collapsed in a diabetic coma in a Dublin street. It was at a time when he was at the height of his drunken notoriety and passers-by naturally thought he was dead drunk. They took him to the nearby surgery of one of Dublin's most fashionable and respected doctors. The doctor decided to take a cardiograph and, somewhat nervous of his patient, thought to humor him. He explained the workings of the cardiograph needle as it registered the faint heartbeats of the very sick and semiconscious Brendan. "That needle there is writing down your pulses, Mr. Behan, and I suppose, in its own way, it is probably the most important thing you have ever written." To which Behan replied: "Aye, and 20

it's straight from me heart, too." WINDY Three old ladies met on the street on a very stormy day. The wind was so strong and loud that they had difficulty in hearing each other. "It's windy," said one. "No, it's Thursday," said the next. "So am I," said the third. "Let's go and have a drink!" NEW SECRETARY The real estate boss got a hot new secretary. Afraid of sexual harassment issues he held himself off for a week, but finally overcome with lust, he decided to put some moves on her. But within a few weeks, he is feeling displeased at the way she is working, not caring, coming to work late, and so on. So, he pulls her aside, and has a little talk with her. "Listen, baby, we may have gone to bed together a few times, but who said you could start coming in late and slacking off?" Looking him in the eyes, she replied, "My lawyer!" BRAIN CHOICES The doctor entered the room and advised his patient that a brain transplant was the only remedy. "Fortunately" he continued, "this hospital has perfected the procedure, however, it is not yet available on the National Health and you will therefore have to pay. We have two brains in stock at the moment, a female brain costing £30,000 and a male brain at £100,000" "Why is the male brain so expensive?" asked the patient. "Oh, that's easy, male brains are hardly used."

OCTOBER 2021

CHETEK - PRAY PAGE

Open: Mon - Fri 3pm - CL and Sat - Sun 11am - CL Resort,, Cabins,, Camping g / ATM M Available! www.tjtimberline.com 715-353-2238 1189 N. Potato Lk. Chetek WI (On North side of Potato Lake) MAGICAL FRIENDS One of my best friends is a professional magician. The only downside to having a magical friend is he always invites us on double dates, and thats the worst because I’m a nice guy, but he’s magic. Theres no way I can compete with that. He shows up, he’s so smooth. Girls love him. He’s like, “How’s it going? You look so beautiful tonight. Your hair -- is that a coin? Now, it’s a rose.” Now, its money. And its like, I show up -- what am I gonna do? I’m like, “Hi, I brought you this rose. Now, its broken.” QUARTER TRICKS A man is walking through the mall with his teen-age son. The son is tossing a quarter up in the air and catching it between his teeth. On one such attempt, the boy fails to clamp down with his teeth and ends up getting the quarter lodged in his throat. As the boy begins to choke and wheeze the father panics and starts yelling for help. Not to far from the action is a man sitting at a coffee shop reading a paper and drinking his coffee, when he hears the fathers distressed cries he patiently puts down his coffee and folds his paper, he then walks slowly over to the boy and grabs him by the balls and squeezes the s*** out of them. The boy coughs

up the quarter and the man catches it in his hand and proceeds to walk away with it, sitting back down to his coffee. The amazed father runs over and says, "Thank you Sir, you saved my son's life. Are you a Doctor?" "No," the man replies, "I work for the IRS." THE FISHING HELPLINE I phoned up the fishing helpline today. I said, “I’m really hopeless at fishing and need some tips." The man said, “Okay, can you hold the line?” I said, “No.”

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IN FULL A businessman met a beautiful girl and agreed to spend the afternoon with her for $500. They did their thing, and, before he left, he told her that he did not have any cash with him, but he would have his secretary write a check and mail it to her, calling the payment "RENT FOR APARTMENT." On the way to the office, he regretted what he had done, realizing that the whole event had not been worth the price. So he had his secretary send a check for $250 and enclose the following typed note: "Dear Madam: Enclosed find a check for $250 for rent of your apartment. I am not sending the amount agreed upon, because when I rented the place, I was under the impression that: 1 - it had never been occupied; 2 - there was plenty of heat; and 3 - it was small enough to make me feel cozy and at home. However, I found out that it had been previously occupied, that there wasn't any heat, and that it was entirely too large." Upon receipt of the note, the girl immediately returned the check for $250 with the following note:

N8395 Pray Road Pittsville, WI (In Town of PRAY) (715) 884-2036

OPEN DAILY: 11a - CL Join us for ..

Packer Games Outside TV on the Deck To Enjoy ALL The Games

OCTOBER 2021

P R AY - W I T H E E P G "Dear Sir: First, I cannot understand how you could expect a beautiful apartment to remain unoccupied indefinitely. As for the heat, there is plenty of it, if you know how to turn it on. Regarding the space, the apartment is indeed of regular size, but if you don't have enough furniture to fill it, please do not blame the management. Please send the rent in full or we will be forced to contact your present landlady." DETECTIVE TEST A policeman was interrogating three SARDARS who were training to become detectives. To test their skills in recognizing a suspect, he shows the first SARDAR a picture for five seconds and then hides it. "This is your suspect, how would you recognize him?" The first SARDAR answers, "That's easy, we'll catch him fast because he only has one eye!" The policeman says, "Well ... uh ... that's because the picture I showed is his side profile." Slightly flustered by this ridiculous response, he flashes the picture for five seconds at the second SARDAR and asks him, "This is your suspect, how would you recognize him?" The second SARDAR smiles, flips his hair and says, "Ha! He'd be too easy to catch because he only has one ear!" The policeman angrily responds, "What's the matter with you two?? Of course only one eye and one ear are showing because it's a picture of

his side profile! Is that the best answer you can come up with?" Extremely frustrated at this point, he shows the picture to the third SARDAR and in a very testy voice asks, "This is your suspect, how would you recognize him? He quickly adds, "Think hard before giving me a stupid answer." The SARDAR looks at the picture intently for a moment and says, "The suspect wears contact lenses." The policeman is surprised and speechless because he really doesn't know himself if the suspect wears contacts or not. "Well, that's an interesting answer. Wait here for a few minutes while I check his file and I'll get back to you on that." He leaves the room and goes to his office, checks the suspect's file in his computer, and comes back with a beaming smile on his face. "Wow! I can't believe it. It's TRUE! The suspect does in fact wear contact lenses. Good work! How were you able to make such an astute observation?" "That's easy," the SARDAR replied. "He can't wear regular glasses because he only has one eye and one ear."

OPEN EVERY DAY Mon 2pm - Cl & Tue - Su 10a - CL HAPPY HOUR: M, T, & TH 50 cent pull tabs (2 Win $$) plus.. Wed & Fri during... DOUBLE BUBBLE 5-6PM Serving Hamburgers & Appetizers Phone: (715) 229-4327 602 Division St, Withee, WI 22

G R E E N W O O D PAG E BARFING George was planning on going out with "The Boys" when his wife told him that he wasn't leaving the house. George's Wife: "The last time you went out with your friends you got so drunk that you puked on your shirt." George: "But Honey, I promise that I won’t drink a drop of alcohol all night!" So after begging his lady for an hour, George got the OK the go out with the guys as long as he stayed off of the booze. George met up with the guys at a local bar and proceeded to get sh*t-faced. After about three hours of guzzling liquor, George blew chow all over his shirt. George: "Sh*t! The my lady is going to throw my arse out of the house for getting drunk and puking on my new shirt!" Bill, George's best pal, gave drunk arse George an idea of how to keep from getting in trouble with the wife. Bill: "All you got to do is have a $20 bill in your hand when you walk through the door. Then, when she accuses you of barfing all over yourself, just tell her that some other drunk puked on you and that he gave you 20 bucks to get the

OCTOBER 2021

shirt cleaned." So, when drunk arse George walked into the house with money in hand, his wife was waiting for him in the living room. Georges wife: "I knew that your drunk arse would spew bile and booze all over that new shirt!" George: "Honey, let me explain! This drunken fool at the bar puked on me and gave me 20 bucks to have it cleaned." His wife snatched the money out of his hand and observed that he was holding two $20 bills. George's wife: "Is that so? Then where did the other 20 dollar bill come from?" George: "Oh, That's from the guy who pooped in my pants." OLDIES COMPETITION An old man and an old woman are together every night. They aren't married, but for years and years they have spent every night together. All they ever do is sit on the couch buck naked and watch TV while she holds his weiner. Every night, like clockwork, they do this - sit on the couch watching TV while she holds his weiner. One night he doesn't show up. Then a second night goes by - no show. She calls him up. "Where you been?" "Oh ... I've been down at what's her name's." "What are you doing there?" "Pretty much the same thing we do - sitting naked on the couch watching TV while she holds my weiner." "Well, what does she have that I don't have?" "Parkinson's."

PASSWORD A female secretary was helping her new boss set up his computer and asked him what word he would like to use as a password to log in with. Wanting to embarrass his new secretary a bit and let her know where they stood, he smugly told her to enter 'penis.' Without blinking or saying a word, she entered the password. She then almost died laughing at the computer's response: PASSWORD REJECTED. NOT LONG ENOUGH! LONE RANGER Tonto and the Lone Ranger had a falling out... because the Lone Ranger discovered that "Kimosabee" actually means... "a*sh*le!" KIDS EAT FOR FREE Waiter: I just wanted to let you know kids eat free. Dad: Good, I'll have water and my daughter will have the steak and a kid's light beer. Enjoy your Fall before the cold!

FUNTE’S

BAR & GRILL

215 S. Main St. Greenwood, WI 715-267-7599

Join Us For..Wraps, Salads, Burgers, Specialty Burgers & Homemade Pizza HAPPY HOUR: Tues - Fri 3-6p HOURS: Tues - Fri: 11-CL, Sat: 12p - CL,

OPEN FOR PACKER GAMES ON SUNDAYS! Sorry Closed Mondays

A R C A D I A PA G E -Love in, $200 a month. References required. -Man wanted to work in dynamite factory. Must be willing to travel. -Used Cars: Why go elsewhere to be cheated? Come here first! Now Open: 4pm - 9pm Tuesday - Saturday CLOSED MONDAYS.. Thru Fall

REAL ADVERTISEMENTS Supposedly, these are actual advertisements that have appeared in papers across the country. -Toaster: A gift that every member of the family appreciates. Automatically burns toast. -Sheer stockings. Designed for fancy dress, but so serviceable that lots of women wear nothing else. Stock up and save. Limit: one. -We build bodies that last a lifetime. -For Rent: 6-room hated apartment. -Man, honest. Will take anything. -Wanted: chambermaid in rectory.

RESTROOM TALK I was barely sitting down when I heard a voice from the other stall saying: 'Hi, how are you?' I'm not the type to start a conversation in the men's restroom, but I don't know what got into me, so I answered, somewhat embarrassed, 'Doin' just fine.' And the other guy says: 'So what are you up to?' What kind of question is that? At that point, I'm thinking this is too bizarre so I say: 'Uhhh, I'm like you, just traveling.' At this point I am just trying to get out as fast as I can when I hear another question. 'Can I come over?' Ok, this question is just too weird for me but I figured I could just be

UNCLE SAM’S OF ARCADIA HAPPY HOUR: Tue - Fri 4-6PM $1.75 Busch Lite & $2.25 Dom. Wed: 50 Cent Wings (Check out our Flavors! BBQ, Asian & Buffalo) Sat: $1.75 Busch Lights 12-8pm Sun: $2.25 Busch Lights w/ Seasoned Pretzels *Watch for specials! PARTY BUS RENTALS AVAILABLE @ UNCLE SAM’S

Join Us at Uncle Sam’s this year! HOURS: Tues - Thur: 11 am - CL / Fri: 6 am - CL Sat: 10 am - CL / Sun: 6 am - CL 309 W. Main St. Arcadia, WI OCTOBER 2021

(608) 323-7USA (7872)

polite and end the conversation. I tell him, 'No........I'm a little busy right now!!!' Then I hear the guy say nervously... 'Listen, I'll have to call you back. There's an idiot in the other stall who keeps answering all my questions.' DELIVERY In the back woods, Mr. Stewart's wife went into labor in the middle of the night, and the doctor was called out to assist in the delivery. To keep the nervous father-to-be busy, the doctor handed him a lantern and said, "Here, you hold this high so I can see what I'm doing." Soon, a wee baby boy was brought into the world. "Whoa there Scotty!" said the doctor. "Don't be in a rush to put the lantern down... I think there's yet another wee one to come." Sure enough, within minutes he had delivered another little baby. "No, no, don't be in a great hurry to be putting down that lantern, young man... It seems there's yet another one besides!" cried the doctor. The new father scratched his head in bewilderment and asked the

UPCHUC K

120 W. Main St. Arcadia, WI (608) 323-9907 OPEN: M-Th Noon - 2am F & Sa 10am - 2:30am Sun 10am - 2am DAILY DRINK SPECIALS DJ Music: Th, Fri, & Sa 9-Cl (Safe Rides Available) 24

doctor. "Do ye think it's the light that's attractin' them?" MAKING MONEY Three boys are in the school yard bragging about their fathers. The first boy says, "My Dad scribbles a few words on a piece of paper, he calls it a poem, they give him $50." The second boy says, "That's nothing. My Dad scribbles a few words on a piece of paper, he calls it a song, they give him $100." Little Johnny says, "I got you both beat. My Dad scribbles a few words on a piece of paper, he calls it a sermon, and it takes eight people to collect all the money!" MISSING WIFE A couple had not been married for long, when the husband came home one day to find that his bride had disappeared. He got very worried and gathered up all his friends to search for his wife with no success. Two days after his wife disappeared the man returned home to find her in the kitchen. He asked her what she had been up to and why she hadn't been home for so long. She replied, "These four men kidnapped me and had wild sex with me for a week." The husband answered, "But it's only been two days what do you mean a week?" "I am just here to get something to eat." HALLOWEEN SAFETY - Drive slowly this Halloween. Kids aren’t looking.. there running! - Use reflective fabric, tape or even makeup in your costumes so you and kids are more visible.

OCTOBER 2021

P I G E O N FA L L S PAG E BLONDE NURSE Q: Why do blonde nurses bring red magic markers to work? A: In case they have to draw blood. MISSING PALM SUNDAY On Palm Sunday, a five-year-old boy had a sore throat and stayed home from church with a babysitter. When the family returned home, they were carrying several palm branches. The boy asked them what they were. “People held them over Jesus’ head as He walked by,” his father told him. “Wouldn’t you know it,” the boy fumed. “The one Sunday I don’t go and Jesus shows up.” WHAT IS FATE A young pupil asked, "Master, what is fate." "Ah, my son, it has made the world a smaller place in which to live, inspiring men of worth to work endless hours and some day enable men to span the universe and light years of travel will soon become mere seconds in time." "And that, my master, is fate?" Dwyer’s ‘My

"Oh, fate! I thought you said freight." WALKING ORDERS A grave digger, walking in the streets of a small town chanced to turn and noticed two doctors walking behind him. He stopped until they passed and then followed on behind them. "And why this?" asked the doctors. "I know my place in this procession," he said. A PUBLICIST FOR MOSES Moses: “How are we going to get across the sea? The Egyptians are close behind us!” General of the army: “Normally, I’d recommend that we build our own bridge to carry us across. But there’s not enough time for that.” Admiral of the navy: “Normally, I’d recommend that we build barges to carry us across. But time is too short.” Public relations officer: “I don’t have a solution, but I can promise you this: If you can find a way out of here, I’ll get you two or three pages in the Old Testament!”

Second Home’ Bar & Grill

13272 Main St. Pigeon Falls, WI

715-983-5664

NOW Serving WALLEYE on FRIDAY NIGHTS Along with our Regular Fish & Shrimp and Dinners!

All the shrimp you can eat. Halloween Party; Saturday October 30th Wednesday 1st - 3rd Prizes - 9 to midnight *Judging at 11p 5pm toAll9pm. 8.99. SHRIMP 5-9pm $8.99 Wed: U-Can-Eat HOURS: Opening at 7:30 am Mon - Fri and 8 am Sat & Sun

*Breakfast Served Daily *Mon - Fri: Lunch Specials 25

TRUE HORROR STORY Writing a horror screenplay. It starts off with a ringing phone. The person answers and it’s their mom saying, “I have a computer question..." TRUE OR FALSE A little kid's in school, taking a true-false test and he's flipping a coin. At the end of the test he's flipping the coin again. The teacher says, "What are you doing?" He says, "Checking my answers." NUMBER JOKES A man is sent to prison for the first time. At night, the lights in the cell block are turned off, and his cellmate goes over to the bars and yells, "Number twelve!" The whole cell block breaks out laughing. A few minutes later, somebody else in the cell block yells, "Number four!" Again, the whole cell block breaks out laughing. The new guy asks his cellmate what's going on. "Well," says the older prisoner, "we've all been in this here prison for so long, we all know the same jokes. So we just yell out the number instead of saying the whole joke." So the new guy walks up to the

M E L R O S E PAG E bars and yells, "Number twenty-nine!" This time the whole cell block rocks with the loudest laughter, prisoners rolling on the floor laughing hysterically. When the guffaws die down, the bewildered new guy turns to the older prisoner and asks, "How come you guys were laughing so hard this time?" "Oh," says the older man wiping tears from his eyes, "we'd never heard that one before." LOST AT SEA? Yossi and Janine, an elderly Jewish couple, are sitting together on an aero plane flying to the Far East. Suddenly, over the public address system, the Captain announces, "Ladies and Gentlemen, I am afraid I have some very bad news. Our engines have ceased functioning, and this plane will be going down in a few minutes time. The good news is that I can see an island below us that should be able to accommodate our landing. The bad news is that this island appears to be uncharted - I am unable to find it on our maps. So the odds are that we will never be rescued and

JC’s Pizza & Pub OPEN Wednesday thru Sat. 4p to CL

CARRY OUT & DINE IN AVAILABLE JOIN US FOR.. FRIDAY FISH FRY ! HAPPI HALLOWEEN.. BE SAFE! Phone:: 608-488-2228 3 miles South of Melrose on @ N378 St Hwy 108 OCTOBER 2021

will have to live on the island for a very long time, if not for the rest of our lives." Yossi turns to Janine and asks, "Janine, dear, did we turn off the oven?" and Janine replies, "Of course." "Janine, are our life insurance policies paid up?" "Of course." "Janine, did we pay our pledge for the synagogue appeal?" "Oh my God, I forgot to send off the cheque." "Thank Heaven! They'll find us for sure!" MET IN PRISON He’s your lawyer. During your initial consultation he tries to sell you Amway. He tells you that his last good case was a "Budweiser." When the prosecutors see who your lawyer is, they high-five each other. He picks the jury by playing "duck-duck-goose."

BLOCK HOUSE BAR N2098 Sanberg Rd Melrose, WI

608-488-4600

Join us..

Wed & Thur $2.00 Dom & Rail ALL DAY! ($2.50 Domestic Beer & Rail All other days) SERVING JAN’S PIZZA DAILY! 26

BU R R OA K - M E L RO S E PAG E During the trial you catch him playing his Gameboy. He asks a hostile witness to "pull my finger." A prison guard is shaving your head. Every couple of minutes he yells, "I call Jack Daniels to the stand!" and proceeds to drink a shot. He frequently gives juror No. 4 the finger. He places a large "No Refunds" sign on the defense table. He begins closing arguments with, "As Ally McBeal once said . . ." He keeps citing the legal case of Godzilla v. Mothra. Just before trial starts he whispers, "The judge is the one with the little hammer, right?" Just before he says "Your Honor," he makes those little quotation marks in the air with his fingers. The sign in front of his law office reads "Practicing Law Since 2:25." Whenever his objection is overruled, he tells the judge, "Whatever." He giggles every time he hears the word "briefs." IDENTITY CRISIS A wild-eyed man, dressed in a Napoleonic costume and hiding his right hand inside his coat, entered the psychiatrist's office and nervously exclaimed, "Doctor, I need your help right away." "I can see that," retorted the doctor. "Lie down on that couch, and tell me your problem." "I don't have any problem," the man snapped. "In fact, as Emperor of France, I have everything I could possibly want: money, women, power--everything! But I'm afraid my wife, Josephine, is in deep

OCTOBER 2021

mental trouble." "I see," said the psychiatrist, humoring his distraught patient. "And what seems to be her main problem?" "For some strange reason," answered the unhappy man, "she thinks she's Mrs. Schwartz." DRINKING BUDDIES A couple of drinking buddies who are airplane mechanics are in a hangar at JFK New York. It's fogged in and they have nothing to do. One of them says to the other, "Man, have you got anything to drink?" The other one says, "Nah, but I hear you can drink jet fuel, and it will kinda give you a buzz." So they do drink it, get smashed and have a great time, like only drinking buddies can. The following morning, one of the men wakes up and he just knows his head will explode if he gets up, but it doesn't. He gets up and feels good. In fact, he feels great! No hangover! The phone rings. It's his buddy. The buddy says, "Hey, how do you feel?" "Great", he said! "Just great"! The buddy says, "Yeah, I feel great too,

and no hangover. That jet fuel stuff is great. We should do this more often! "Yeah, we could, but there's just one thing . . . " "What's that?" "Did you fart yet?" "No . . . " "Well, DON'T, 'cause I'm in Phoenix." MISTAKEN IDENTITY Once upon a time there was this guy who bought a hang glider and took it out to the mountains to fly it. He was cruising along a few hundred feet above the treetops when he spots these two hunters down below. He hollers and waves at them, trying to be sociable. Suddenly the hunters look up and they both fire their double barrel shotguns at him. When the hang glider was out of sight one of the hunters turns to the other and says, "What kinda bird you reckon that was?" The other hunter replies, "I don't rightly know, but I think we hit it." "How's that?" "You saw how fast he dropped that man he was caring, didn't ya?"

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O C TO B E R E N T E R TA I N M E N T

KARAOKE 1st, 3rd & 5th Friday Halloween Party Oct. 29th Prizes for 1st, 2nd & 3rd Place Serving: Jan’s & Clark Pizza Phone # 715-284-9345

Sorry Closed sundays Fri & Sat 10a - 2:30a

$4 Bloody w/Rail / $5 (other) N5890 HWY 54 Black River Falls, WI www.facebook.com/SunsetTavern

SEPT 2021 WORD SEARCH PUZZLE

BLACK RIVER FA L L S PA G E PEE IN CHURCH A mother took her little boy to church. While in church the little boy said, "Mommy, I have to pee." The mother said to the little boy, "It's not appropriate to say the word 'pee' in church. So, from now on whenever you have to 'pee' just tell me that you have to 'whisper'." The following Sunday, the little boy went to church with his father and during the service said to his father, "Daddy, I have to whisper." The father looked at him and said, "Okay, why don't you whisper in my ear." PONDERING COLLECTION -Whose cruel idea was it for the word "lisp" to have an "s" in it? -Since light travels faster than sound, isn't that why some people appear bright until you hear them speak? -How come abbreviated is such a long word? -If it's zero degrees outside today and it's supposed to be twice as cold tomorrow, how cold is it going to be? -Since Americans throw rice at weddings, do Asians throw hamburgers? -Why are they called apartments, when they're all stuck together? -Why do banks charge you a "non-sufficient funds fee" on money they already know you don't

OCTOBER 2021

have? -If a tree falls in the forest and no one is around to see it, do the other trees make fun of it? -When two airplanes almost collide why do they call it a near miss?? It sounds like a near hit to me!! -Do fish get cramps after eating? $5,000,000 QUESTION Bob had finally made it to the last round of the $5,000,000 Question. The night before the big question, he told the M.C. that he desired a question on American History. The big night had arrived. Bob made his way on stage in front of the studio and TV audience. He had become the talk of the week. He was the best guest this show had ever seen. The M.C. stepped up to the mic. "Bob, you have chosen American History as your final question. You know that if you correctly answer this question, you will walk away $5,000,000 dollars richer. Are you ready?" Bob nodded with a cocky confidence-the crowd went nuts. He hadn't missed a question all week. "Bob, your question on American History is a two-part question. As you know, you may answer either part first. As a rule, the second half of the question is always easier. Which part would you like to take a stab at first?" Bob was now becoming more noticeably nervous. He couldn't believe it, but he was drawing a blank. American History was his easiest subject, but he played it

OCTOBER 2021

B L AC K R I V E R FA L L S - E T T R I C K P G Open Daily @ 9am

The Corner Pub

Open Daily @ 9am

HAPPY HOUR: 3-6pm Sunday - Friday 50 Cents Off ALL Drinks! 22 833 N M ain St . Et t rick, W I ( 608) 525-4863

Come right to the corner.. for more fun!

safe. "I'll try the easier part first." The M.C. nodded approvingly. "Here we go Bob. I will ask you the second half first, then the first half." The audience silenced with gross anticipation . . . "Bob, here is your question: And in what year did it happen??" BEWARE OF DOG Upon entering the little country store, a stranger noticed a sign saying "DANGER! BEWARE OF DOG!" posted on the glass door. Inside he noticed a harmless old hound dog asleep on the floor besides the cash register. He asked the store manager, "Is THAT the dog folks are supposed

to beware of?" "Yep, that's him," he replied. The stranger couldn't help but be amused. "That certainly doesn't look like a dangerous dog to me. Why in the world would you post that sign?" "Because," the owner replied, "before I posted that sign, people kept tripping over him." BLONDE ATTENDANT Q: Why did the blonde quit her job as a restroom attendant? A: She couldn't figure out how to refill the hand dryer! Check out the entertainment page for some fun in October. Page 31

*Tapper Tuesdays: $1 Off Taps *Wednesdays: LADIES NIGHT *THIRSTY Thursdays: -All TALL Cans Only $2.00 Happy Hour MON -FRI 2-5p OPEN @ 11am 7 DAYS A WEEK

*Friday Fish Fry

LUNCH & DINNER SPECIALS - All-U-Can-EatSERVED: 11am - 9pm PACKER SUNDAY SPECIALS FULL MENU AVAILABLE Food @ 1/2 & Apple pie shots for all Packer touchdowns Welcome Trail Riders!

W9944 Airport Rd., Black River Falls, WI 29

SUDUKO ‘HARD’ PUZZLE

OCTOBER 2021

CROSSWORD PUZZLE ANSWER

ON-GOING G WEEKLY Y ENTERTAINMENT Tuesdays: -Brickhouse - E. C. - New Every Tuesday: Open Mic 7-11pm w/Cereral Skillet Sing w/Band or Solo Wednesdays -Brickhouse - E.C. -Open jam wednesdays Thursdays: -Girolamo’s - E.C. - Karaoke 9P -1st & Goal - C.F. - DJ Not2Shy -VFW Post-305-E.C.- Karaoke 8 -Midnight -Sidetrack - Roberts- Every Thursday Oatmeal Band 4-7pm -Slim’s - Lk Hallie Karaoke -The Pourhouse – Elk Mound – DJ Trivia Fridays: -VFW Post-305-E.C.- Karaoke 9p-1a -Rookies Pub- C.F.-DJ or Band -Block House- Melrose- Librya Union Live Every 2nd and 4th Friday starts @ 7pm -Sunset Tavern - BRF - Karaoke the 1st and 3rd Fridays Monthly (and 5th Friday when that happens) -Slim’s - Lk Hallie Karaoke Saturdays: -VFW Post 305 - E.C. -Live Music Every SAT from 8pm to Midnight -Brick House- E.C.-- Karaoke @9pm -Uncle Sam’s of Arcadia – House DJ -R & R’s First and Last Chance - BRFKaraoke 8pm Sundays -VFW Post-305-E.C.- Oldies DJ Music Sundays @2:30-6:30pm -Block House- Melrose- Karaoke 1st & 3rd Sundays with Coleman starts @ 2pm

SPECIAL OCCASIONS -Eagle’s - Lk Hallie - Karaoke @5pm BINGOClub / MUSIC BINGO:

-Tim’s Slim’s –Lake Hallie - Music Bingo" Tues -Kern’s Kurbside – Elmwood- Thursday (Spring - Fall Patio Bingo starting @ 7pm) and Bingo EVERY Sunday at 2pm *Proceeds go to Autism Awareness *Pull Tab Drawing EVERY Sunday at 5pm

-The Bungalow – Lakeland MN- Bingo Starts Sats From 2-4pm and Continues Every Saturday till further notice -Eagle’s Club - Lk Hallie - Wed Night Bingo at 6pm *Proceeds donated to Skating and hockey kids to cut costs. FUNDRAISER: -Kern’s Kurbside – ElmwoodFundraiser: Breast Cancer SUN October 17th - Dart Tournament starting at noon / 50/50 & Meat Raffles throughout the day / Free will food starting at 1pm

OCTOBER 2021

BREAKFAST CLUB: -The Bungalow -Lakeland, MNThur & Fri 8a till 10:45 / Sat & Sun 7:30a till 11:45 / Sun. Brunch 9a-1:30p -Corral Bar & Grill - Durand -Daily 5a – 11:30a -Side Tracks-RobertsSat. 8-11am & Sun 9a-noon -Village Inn, North Hudson- Daily 8-11am -Tim’s Slims Lake Hallie Tavern breakfast CARD, CRIBBAGE, DICE: -Kern’s Kurbside – Elmwood Every Tuesday Euchre @1pm -Block House - Melrose - Euchre Mon(s) 6p DART & POOL: -Tim’s Slim’s –Lake HalliePool Tournaments every other Saturday noon start *Food and raffles MEAT RAFFLE: -Lake Hallie Sportsman’s Club – Lk Hallie Meat Raffles @ 6pm TRIVIA: -Kern’s Kurbside – ElmwoodMonday @7pm TOWN CELEBRATIONS:

-Sidetrack’s Saloon-Roberts"Tentative " Annual Oktoberfest, Sat Oct. 16th.. Concertina band at 4 p.m. Hammerschlaggen & more

SEPTEMBER R 2021 1 SATURDAY, SEPTEMBER 25 -Lake Hallie Sportsman’s Club –Lake Hallie- Margaritaville 3-7 -VFW 305 - E.C. - 100 Proof -Kern’s Kurbside - Elmwood - End of 'Summer Luau' Bean Bag Tourney starting at 1pm - Free juke box 4-6pm -Bear Creek Band- —Mole Lake Casino 8 to 12 SUNDAY, SEPTEMBER 26 -Bear Creek Band-Roadhouse 25 Wheeler—2 to 6pm

OCTOBER R 2021 1 FRIDAY, OCTOBER 1 -Bear Creek Band - Red's Grill & Bar in Chetek, WI—8pm to 12am SATURDAY, OCTOBER 2 -Lake Hallie Sportsman’s Club –LHJim Schu 4-7pm -Bear Creek Band -Shotski's in Eagle River, WI—7 to 11pm -VFW Post-305-E.C. - Rock-a-Billy Riot

WEDNESDAY, OCTOBER 6 -Bear Creek Band -Northwoods Country Jam in Osseo, WI—6 to 9pm SATURDAY, OCTOBER 9 -Bear Creek Band -The Mix Up in Amery, WI—6 to 10pm -VFW Post-305-E.C.- Ember -Lake Hallie Sportsman’s Club –LH2 Broke Dudes 4 -7pm FRIDAY, OCTOBER 15 -Bear Creek Band -The Funny Farm Flea Market in Chetek, WI—6 to 10pm SATURDAY, OCTOBER 16 -VFW Post-305-E.C.- Lassos & Lace -Bear Creek Band -Cedarbrook Church Fundraiser in Menomonie, WI6:30 to 11pm

SATURDAY, OCTOBER 23 -VFW Post-305-E.C.- Austin Fire FRIDAY, OCTOBER 29 -Bear Creek Band -Robins Nest in La Crosse, WI—8pm to 12am -Sunset Tavern - BRF - Halloween Party Music and Costume contest SATURDAY, OCTOBER 30 -Dwyer’s My Second Home Bar & Grill – Pigeon Falls- Halloween Costume Party Prizes 9 to midnight *Judging at 11pm -Bear Creek Band -Dixon's Autumn Harvest Winery in Chip Falls, WI 5 to 9 -VFW Post-305-E.C.- Rock-a-Billy Riot -Lake Hallie Sportsman’s Club –LHHalloween Party Prizes *Music By: Black Sheep Duo 7-10pm -Rookies Pub- C.F.- Halloween Costume Contest Party -The Pourhouse – Elk Mound – Halloween Costume Party & Contest 8pm *Judging at 11pm Fun and Prizes! -Slim’s Lake Hallie Tavern - Lk Hal Halloween Costume Contest SUNDAY, OCTOBER 31 -Bear Creek Band - The Funny Farm Flea Market in Chetek, WI—3 to 7pm COMING IN NOVEMBER -Rookies Pub- C.F.- Nov 13th Darrel & Darin’s Birthday Party with Dart Tourney starting at Noon Don’t drink and drive this Halloween or any time of year.. Your life is important and so are others lives. Get a designated driver and have more fun!

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OCTOBER 2021