GET IT I BUSINESS
It's
okay
not to be
okay
We’re living in a global village, yet often feel more isolated and alone than ever.
The unwritten rule that entrepreneurs and business owners must appear successful, hide their struggles and not be transparent about the roller coaster ride of small business leads many to feel isolated and alone, financial advisor Amanda Cassar is here to address it
o, you’ve just gone down the rabbit hole on Instagram again, and see all your friends, colleagues and competitors totally killing it. Their feeds feature their clean, wholesome children, curated holidays, luxe lives and what appears to be an alternate reality. Somehow, it leaves you feeling a little hollow… like maybe you don’t have it all together… and that it’s not okay. But hey, who’s going to listen, right? No one likes a whiner, so you put your big girl panties on and deal with it. It’s time to post your own sparkly pic and suck it up Princess! But surely, you’re not alone? We’re living in a global village, yet often feel more isolated and alone than ever. Surely, there must be more who feel this way! And you’re right, there are. The recent high-profile deaths of designer Kate Spade and world-travelling chef Anthony Bourdain highlight again that mental health is everyone’s issue and it’s time to tear off the band-aid, get vulnerable and say,‘No, I’m not okay.’ It doesn’t matter how successful, wealthy or popular we are, emotional stress and strain is everywhere, from celebrity to locals in business. September annually features the international R U OK Day and aims to raise awareness of mental health issues and where to turn if you need help. It’s sad that we need a special day to highlight awareness for what should be an everyday care issue. Writing Financial Secrets Revealed allowed me to intimately interview 20 amazing people who were open and vulnerable and shared their personal and September 2018
financial journeys with me. And guess what? We’re not all okay. But even that’s okay. Successful UK-based financial adviser and BBC regular David Braithwaite shared his battles with stress and anxiety. He often wanted to give up and felt unworthy of the position he found himself in. I loved the takeout that he shared that “we need to live in a world where we make it safe to be vulnerable with each other and share what’s really going on for all of us. We’re all in this together.” Having heard David deliver a keynote in Vancouver to 14,000 people, I was privileged to be with him a year later when someone from that audience met him and shared what an impact his story had on his life. It was an incredibly touching moment, and got me a little misty-eyed, and to thinking. I come from a family where mental illness abounds, and personally suffered depression after having my children and returning to work, studying for my Masters degree, owner-building our third home and growing a business. To be honest, this is the first time I’ve publicly admitted that, because I too still feel that there’s a stigma to it. I don’t want to be pitied or viewed as a victim. Only a handful of people knew that I was ever on anti-depressants, and I’m a chronic oversharer! Former Gold Coast local and investigative journalist Tanya Targett shared the stories of negative money lessons she’d learned in childhood from her nowestranged family and her personal journey to flee a financially and emotionally abusive relationship. When she realised that her 34
mental and physical health were impacted, and this was no place to raise her daughter, she bravely did what needed to be done and started over from scratch. Her journey is a ‘rags to riches’ tale that needs to be shared. The high-profile murder of Brisbane mother Alison Baden-Clay and the court case that followed was the catalyst that finally encouraged Tanya to move on. Financial and emotional abuse featured strongly in Alison’s case and the “DO Something” campaign is now in full swing. Another story features Palm Beachbased singing teacher, marriage celebrant and former DJ, Ann-Marie Von Douglas. Lovely Annie fell madly in love with a German Count, was swept off her feet and lived a jet-set lifestyle delivering luxury cars throughout Europe before returning to Australia to have her children. Annie abdicated all financial decisions to her now ex-husband and trusted that he was doing the right thing. Annie now makes ends meet on the Centrelink Pension. It’s not often you come across someone who can manage going from a champagne to a beer budget with the grace that this lovely lady does. So, I know it’s not just me who feels it. It’s time to get real with each other. Grab your favourite girlfriend, family member, entrepreneur, mentor or buddy and get talking about what’s really going on. Don’t just share the highlights reel, although you totally must celebrate the wins! But make sure you include the bloopers, the struggles, the anguish and tears. After all, isn’t that what makes us all part of this big, crazy human family?