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SEVEN THINGS TO DO IN SEVEN DAYS
Je ne sais quality Dina Martina brings her lounge act to New Orleans BY WILL COVIELLO DINA MARTINA’S LOUNGE ACT in drag is not easy to describe. But many have tried. “Her onstage banter scans like transmissions from a woozy alternate reality where female superstars resemble walrus prostitutes, sport brown pipe cleaners on their lapels to salute ‘the fight against rump cancer’ and drink hot Sprite (Dina’s favorite),” wrote David Schmader in Seattle’s weekly newspaper The Stranger. That was in the writeup when Martina was being given one of the paper’s 2012 Genius Awards. Asked to describe her own act, Martina told one interviewer, “I was always taught that if you can’t say anything nice, you shouldn’t say anything at all.” Martina is the best and worst lounge act at the same time. She brings her Fine Avec Me show to One Eyed Jacks May 22. Martina predates and is not like the current wave of RuPaul-era drag stars. She doesn’t lip-sync and she’s not glamorous. She’s not conventionally attractive or even unconventionally attractive. Her look is marked by over-applied makeup with a huge skidmark of red lipstick veering far off course on one side. Her black wigs favor messy ’70s looks such as bobs and short, scruffy shags. Her clothes are ill-fitting or ill-chosen or both. Her dancing makes her appearance look professional. Martina also has managed her career in a counterintuitive way, not posting videos of her performances online and, in recent years, avoiding any interviews out of character. For the curious, there are at least two snippets of her rendition of “Greatest Love of All” posted online. In one she wears an aquamarine velour jumpsuit that’s tight in all the wrong places. In another, she wears a long, fringed white T-shirt (or
too-short dress?) with “Las Vegas” written on the front and the fringe not really hiding much of her controltop pantyhose. Martina begins in a saccharine sweet tone appropriate for cable TV shopping shows, but as she sings her altered lyrics — not about believing children are the future — she gets more animated. She points to audience members and pumps her fists. Her voice climbs toward octaves it should not approach, and then she lets out a husky growl of satisfaction, like a tipsy karaoke singer who’s going all out. Then she pivots into Dead or Alive’s synthpop hit “You Spin Me Round (Like a Record).” Between odd song choices (“The Devil Went Down to Georgia,” Christmas carols), Martina speaks in a seamless flow of mispronunciations, malapropisms and an inconsistently applied soft lisp. New York is always “New York Shitty,” and Los Angeles becomes “lozenges.” Although she’s completely benign, she finds blissfully clumsy and oblivious ways to express herself. She compares being asked to name her favorite song to Sophie’s Choice. The Stranger isn’t her only fan. Others include Margaret Cho, for whom she’s opened shows, Alan Cumming, John Waters, REM’s Michael Stipe, South Park co-creator Matt Stone, actress Jennifer Coolidge and conservative writer Andrew Sullivan. Martina got her start in Seattle in 1989 in what she thought would be a one-off performance at an art event at the Center on Contemporary Art, which is in a neighborhood that then was rougher, not far from The Lusty Lady strip club (“We take off more than Boeing”). The curator wanted an art peep show, and viewers had to line up at holes in a screen to watch the stream of performers sing or dance to a boombox. For her debut, Martina
WED. MAY 23 | 2018’s Soulfire Live! captures the first tour in nearly two decades from bandanna-wearing E Street Band guitarist and Soprano family consigliere Steven Van Zandt, whose 2017 LP Soulfire is his return to his solo rock ’n’ roll. He’s on the run again with his Disciples of Soul, this time as a benefit for music education program TeachRock, at 8 p.m. at House of Blues.
The Truth Has Changed THU.-SUN. MAY 24-27 | Josh Fox, director of the award-winning film about fracking, Gasland, performs a monologue about disasters, politics and social action from 9/11 through the BP oil disaster and Bernie Sanders’ presidential campaign. At 8 p.m. Thursday through Saturday and 6 p.m. Sunday at the Contemporary Arts Center.
Iceage THU. MAY 24 | The Danish punks stumble into widescreen, Phil Spector-sized sonics on May’s Beyondless (Matador Records), the band’s move from rigid, gloomy post-punk into a brighter tomorrow. Missing and Cervix Couch open at 9 p.m. at Santos Bar.
Giselle FRI. MAY 25 | New Orleans Ballet Theatre presents the classic ballet in which a nobleman disguises himself as a peasant to woo a young woman as her friends try to protect the vulnerable girl from the mysterious stranger. At 8 p.m. at Orpheum Theater. MAY 22 FINE AVEC ME: DINA MARTINA 8 P.M. TUESDAY ONE EYED JACKS, 615 TOULOUSE ST., (504) 569-8361; WWW.ONEEYEDJACKS.NET TICKETS $20-$40
wore a polyester dress, a Morticia Addams wig and Halloween makeup she bought on closeout at a Hallmark store. That led to a few more art shows before Martina realized that her following wasn’t just friends. She developed her own show, which has video segments to allow her time for costume changes. Martina has been a full-time performer for the past 15 years, spending summers working in Provincetown, Massachusetts, and making annual trips to Los Angeles, Las Vegas, New York, London and, since 2014, New Orleans.
Bayou Country Superfest SAT.-SUN. MAY 26-27 | Country music stars George Strait, Chris Stapleton, Kacey Musgraves, Little Big Town and Midland perform at 4 p.m. Sunday in the Superdome. There’s a free concert featuring Randy Houser, Michael Ray and Runaway June at 6 p.m. Saturday in Champions Square.
Continental Drifters SAT. MAY 26 | The supergroup (a Bangle, a dB and a Cowsill, among others) migrated from Los Angeles to New Orleans in the early ’90s, piling up power-pop and folk- and blues-inspired rock ’n’ roll across a few albums and singles, lovingly compiled on 2015’s Drifted: In the Beginning and Beyond. A lineup with Vicki Peterson, Peter Holsapple, Susan Cowsill, Mark Walton, Robert Mache and Russ Broussard performs at 9 p.m. at Tipitina’s.
5 G A M B I T > B E S T O F N E WO R L E A N S . C O M > M AY 2 2 - 2 8 > 2 0 1 8
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