The Madison Unitarian | February 2023

Resilience

won’t you celebrate with me

won’t you celebrate with me what i have shaped into a kind of life? i had no model. born in babylon both nonwhite and woman what did i see to be except myself? i made it up here on this bridge between starshine and clay, my one hand holding tight my other hand; come celebrate with me that everyday something has tried to kill me and has failed.

Lucille Clifton, 1993

As a former public school teacher, I confess I initially approached February’s theme with a degree of cynicism. In the educational sphere, “resilience”—like “grit” and “perseverance,” like “growth mindset,” “character,” and countless other buzzwords—has been embraced as a pedagogical panacea to cure the ills our students face. Administrators especially love these buzzwords, I’ve found, because they put the onus of change on the teachers, not the district—and conveniently, they’re free.

When words like resilience become trendy, their meanings tend to expand until they become shapeless bags, carrying everything and signifying nothing. As a culture, we have also done this to “self-care,” a term which originated in activist circles as a reminder to protect yourself from emotional burnout when fighting injustice, but which has now been co-opted by capitalism to sell bubble bath and essential oils. Self-care is also touted as a solution to our feelings of being overworked, underpaid, and stretched to our limits—not that a bubble bath won’t help in the short term, but no amount of self-care will fix the larger structural issues of unfettered extractive capitalism, economic injustice, and crumbling social support systems.

Similarly, resilience is an individualistic fix for a larger structural problem. When someone tells me we need to teach kids to be more resilient, my inner cynic hears, “We’re not going to solve any of the problems these kids face, so we’d better teach them how to survive.”

Resilience has a shadow side, too, one that many Midwesterners know well: the impulse to work hard and stay strong and not waste your time with little things like grief. And though we may

FROM THE EDITOR

Molly Backes, Communications Coordinator

celebrate the resilience of communities and cultures who have managed to find joy in the midst of oppression, I would argue that we should also acknowledge what has been lost along the way. Resilience can be beautiful, yes, but imagine what joy might have come if people didn’t have to put so much of their energy into surviving.

Nevertheless, there can be great value in resilience. According to a study in the Journal of Global Pediatric Health, teenagers with higher levels of resilience suffer fewer negative outcomes after experiencing stressful or traumatic situations in childhood. What helps to foster these higher levels of resilience? Significant factors include “a stable relationship with a caring adult, belief in one’s own capability, [...] and faith or cultural traditions.”

In other words, what builds resilience is relationships. Family, friends, community, and faith traditions. It is us, together.

This month offers us all a chance to interrogate the concept of resilience. In what ways does it feel helpful to you? What are its limitations? Are there situations where resilience isn’t the best response? How can we work to build resilience in our community, both here at FUS and in the broader world? Can we strengthen resilience— our own and others’—by creating time and space to fall apart? Is it possible to celebrate our resilience without also honoring the struggles and acknowledging the grief we experienced along the way? How do we transform our resilience into joy?

Enjoy the month, everyone. We have a lot of good work to do! ◊

FROM THE MINISTERS

Rev. Kelly Crocker, Co-Senior Minister

During the lockdown phase of the pandemic, I, like many of you, found solace in taking a walk. Many of us began walking just to get out of our homes where our entire world was confined to spaces we shared with our partners, our children, our parents, or just ourselves. Walking was a way to move in a world that became dangerous and small almost overnight, a chance to remain connected with others outside a computer screen. Walking was also a way to engage the natural world, to remember that interconnected web of life when everything felt disconnected.

In one of my favorite places to walk, there is a path that winds through a row of giant pine trees. Clearly designed, the rows of pine branches weave together to create a cathedral-like path through the woods. It is an astounding space in any season--whether it's the cool shade in summer or heavy with snow in the deep winter.

We often see trees as solitary specimens, bravely and resiliently embracing the seasons each year. They are quite remarkable in all they provide for our world--oxygen, food, shelter. They endure the harsh winters, insect infestations, and humans. They adapt, cope, and endure hardships but they are not solitary.

In recent years, new research has emerged demonstrating the interconnectedness of trees. Scientists are uncovering how the root systems are far more complex than we imagined. For example, when one tree experiences an insect infestation, it will release an immune-like response which is transmitted through the roots. Neighboring trees receive this signal and activate their own response to protect themselves.

When it comes to resilience, trees are wise teachers. Despite the elements, the invaders, the threats, trees teach us that resilience isn't a solitary act. Yes, resilience is our own work. It is how we choose to cope with accepting the reality we face. Yes, resilience is both the character we possess and the skill we hone. But resilience happens in community. When we experience a personal hardship–the death of a loved one, a divorce, a health crisis, or job loss–we choose how we respond, but when we live in community, we do not respond isolated from the care and support of others. Likewise, when we experience hardship on a community or global level, like the pandemic, we choose resiliency as a community, facing the reality we've been dealt with by sharing kindness and resources.

Resilience reminds us that though we must face our hardships, we choose how we respond. And trees remind us that we live rooted in community. May we be resilient in the face of the harsh days of living, and may we know the supportive presence of community, reminding us that we do not face it alone. ◊

When asked to present a Board member’s perspective on this month’s spiritual theme, I was intrigued by the opportunity to reflect on First Unitarian Society’s resilience over the past few years. This reflection also spurred the question of how we can continue building resilience as a community to face challenges that may arise in years ahead and grow in our collective faith and impact.

For several years it seemed that FUS was stuck in liminal space on a threshold between the past and the present–preparing to embark on an exciting new chapter, still rooted in our faith community’s past traditions and rituals and our UU Principles. At that moment, there was a perfect storm of challenges and uncertainties facing our congregation–the retirement of our longtime beloved minister, a series of interim ministers, and a yearlong ministerial search. We were a congregation in transition during a pandemic, learning to engage in a new impersonal form of interpersonal engagement. This was indeed a resilient congregation facing unprecedented challenges.

The seas are now calming. We successfully transitioned through those challenges. This is by no means to say congregational life has necessarily resumed to the way we once knew it, but there is ongoing excitement as FUS adapts, evolves and continues to grow as a faith community, and it’s our resilience–our toughness and capacity to withstand and recover quickly from difficulties–that got us here.

Here is an exciting time in our congregation’s history. We are now implementing a co-ministry model with Team Kelly at our helm. What joy it is to have two unique, passionate ministers working in harmony together at FUS–guiding us in the

FROM THE BOARD

Joy Stieglitz Gottschalk, Board Member

exploration of our unique spiritual paths and our shared congregational life! We are also in the process of creating new Mission and Vision Statements that will provide an updated roadmap later this spring. Together, our congregation, ministers and staff are forging a new path in this next chapter.

So, how do we continue to strengthen our resilience in anticipation of the next set of challenges that may come our way? Building resilience in our FUS community relies on engagement, stewardship, and volunteering in shared ministry and collective accountability. Shared ministry thrives when we all work cooperatively together. When we strive to discover, develop, utilize and support the gifts of each person as responsible stewards, we produce an overspill of energy that is greater than the sum of the parts. We actively participate in the preservation, restoration and creation of our community and the world, and we build resilience.

How might you share in ministry and fortify FUS’ resilience? What does that look and feel like to you as a member of our community? Will you sing as part of our ministry of music? Will you join the Journey Circle for Families with Young Children? Will you volunteer as an usher or greeter? Sign up for an adult ed class? Will you read As Long As Grass Grows: The Indigenous Fight for Environmental Justice, from Colonization to Standing Rock and discuss it with the Sustainability Book group? Board President Alyssa Ryanjoy and I recently pondered, what would it look like if Leslie (Ross) didn’t have to try to fill all the RE teacher slots because we had a list of teachers ready to go?

(con’t on page 7)

FROM THE BOARD

(con’t from page 6)

Winter has always been a time to turn inward and reflect deeply. As the sun begins to shine brighter and the days lengthen, there are more daylight hours to share with others. We can find new opportunities to share in ministry. As a FUS Board member and fellow congregant, I wish you the best on your journey as you explore ways to engage, enjoy, and continue strengthening our resilient beloved community.

BLK History Month

Nikki Giovanni, 2002

If Black History Month is not viable then wind does not carry the seeds and drop them on fertile ground rain does not dampen the land and encourage the seeds to root sun does not warm the earth and kiss the seedlings and tell them plain: You’re As Good As Anybody Else You’ve Got A Place Here, Too

SPOTLIGHT ON: BUILDING BRIDGES

Gail Moede Rogall, Member of the Children’s RE Ministry Team

Building Bridges (BB) is the CRE class offered for 6th graders (11- and 12-year-olds) at FUS. Sixteen students and four volunteer teachers (two each week) make up this Sunday 9 am class. Students learn about religions from around the world including Judaism, Islam, Hinduism, Sikhism, Christianity, Buddhism, Paganism, and UUism. It is a wonderful way for students to learn about the core beliefs of various faiths and some of their traditions, important texts, and symbols.

Religions are placed along a timeline and introduced chronologically, which helps give context of religious developments and evolution. Though the focus is not on religious history and more on nurturing positive outlooks toward other faiths and the people who follow them. Often a short video is shown at the beginning of each unit.

Reenie Euhardy, currently one of the four BB teachers, has been a volunteer teacher in CRE for many years. She says, “Teaching sixth graders is appealing to me and there are always new things I learn (or relearn!) about other religions. The children are old enough to participate in thoughtful discussions and have opinions; having students readily speaking up in class is a pleasure.”

In addition to Reenie, this year’s teaching team includes Jane Nelson Worel, Scott Harrington, and Mo Lancaster. Teachers help create an environment where respectful exploration and questioning (go UUs!) are encouraged, and where differences are encountered with open minds and hearts.

Goals of the Building Bridges curriculum are to:

• Increase knowledge of religions practiced around the world and in local communities

• Understand how religion addresses basic human needs

• Foster acceptance of the diverse forms that religious expression takes

• Build awareness of the diversity of followers within every faith; understand that to know someone’s religious identity is not the same as knowing what that person thinks, believe, or practices

• Support the faith development of participants

• Empower youth to better appreciate human diversity and connect with others and be able to respectfully discuss important matters with people with whom they disagree

• Nurture open-mindedness and critical inquiry

The class so far has visited Temple Beth El during their study of Judaism and the Deer Park Buddhist Center during their study of Buddhism. They will also visit the Madinah Islamic Center, the Shiva Vishnu Hindu Temple, Blackhawk Church, and Blessed Sacrament.

During my recent visit to the Building Bridges classroom, they were starting a new unit learning about Sikhism. When asked what they enjoy most about the class the students seem to agree that they enjoy the site visits. “I like learning about different religions. I didn’t even know Sikhism existed,” relayed one student. “Every religion is unique,” said another student.

“Each unit begins with a video, designed for middle school children, which introduces that faith,” Reenie explains. “Lesson plans engage the students with activities and discussions, often incorporating stories and quiz games to enhance learning.” (con’t on page 9)

SPOTLIGHT ON: BUILDING BRIDGES

(con’t from page 8)

“

Each unit starts with the students filling out a wall chart that includes factual information about the religion; after deeper exploration, the unit ends with the creation of a ‘bridge’ that identifies beliefs that UUism and that religion have in common. The focus is on appreciating all religions, not teaching that our UU religion is necessarily better than others.”

Four years ago, when my son was in 6th grade, I helped to teach this class and I found that it was an insightful way to learn alongside the students. The opportunity to visit other places of worship was a big bonus. Many parents enjoy joining in on the field trips.

If you are curious about world religions, enjoy 6th graders, want to have the opportunity to visit other places of worship, and be of service to FUS, I highly recommend signing up to teach this class. You do not need to be an expert on world religions but will certainly know more about them by the end of this class. ◊

Building Bridges Class in 2023

SMALL GROUP MINISTRY

One of the ways to engage in our community here at FUS is through our many small groups! The folllowing groups currently have openings for new members:

Knot Just for Knitters is a social group for those interested in gathering as they work on hand crafts. Currently meeting on Zoom, considering in-person. Contact Dorit Bergen at elanor3560@ att.net for more information.

Non-Fiction Book Group meets the second Friday of the month, 2pm - 4pm via Zoom. Contact Nancy Seaman at nancy184@charter.net for more information.

Open Men’s Group meets on the second and fourth Mondays of each month at 7pm. The group uses a multi-platform meeting of in-person and Zoom. Contact facilitator Gordon Olson at olson99gl@ gmail.com for information.

Spiritual Topics Book Group meets the third Tuesday of the month at 7pm via Zoom. Contact Ken

Janet Swanson, Director of Membership and Adult Programs

Gage at kmgage@msn.com for their reading list and more information.

Sustainability Book Group meets every two weeks. Contact Janice Knapp-Cordes janice. knappcordes@gmail.com for the reading list and further information.

Ukulele Group meets every Tuesday evening at 6:30pm in the Music Rehearsal Room in the Atrium building. New musicians are welcome, and singers are invited. Contact the group’s organizers Anne Marie Skye amskyeart.com for more information.

Women on a Journey Chalice Group is open to one or two new members. Contact facilitators Carole Thomas carothos@aol.com or Diane Walker diwalks@att.net for more information. The chalice group meets in-person on the fourth Thursday evening of the month. ◊

JOIN NEW UU THIS FEBRUARY!

New UU is an orientation class for newcomers and friends of First Unitarian Society, with introductions to Unitarian Universalism and the life of our faith community. Participants will have the opportunity to:

• become acquainted with other interested adults,

• learn about Unitarian Universalism and the organization of FUS,

• explore their own personal beliefs and values,

• discern if they are consonant with Unitarian Universalism,

• and consider next steps to deeper involvement at FUS.

New UU will be held Saturday, February 25, 2023, from 9 am - 11:30 am on-site at FUS in Courtyard Classroom AB (in the Atrium building). Registration is required. A fee of $10 covers materials. Childcare will be available. To register, contact Janet at janets@fusmadison.org.

VALENTINE JAZZ SOIRÉE

Cheryll Mellenthin, Project Coordinator

We are people of love. Love shines a light on the life we share with others. Love compels us to treat each other with kindness and compassion. Love brings people from diverse backgrounds together, and it creates a sense of belonging. Love is accompanied by an equality-consciousness that fosters doing good work in our world. Love is the foundation of friendships; it brings us together as a community and elevates each individual act of love into a movement, a cause, the joyful ability to coalesce around the magic we can make together.

Love in the more recent times also means that when we plan for gatherings to celebrate all in our community, we do so with the intent that all are safely welcomed. It is in this spirit that we again offer our virtual Valentine Jazz Soirée! We’re offering locally sourced meal and dessert kits from Isthmus Eats to make at home. To accompany your delicious meal is a concert by the Michael BB Trio featuring a guest saxophonist, filmed in the beautiful Landmark Auditorium. Valentine Jazz Soirée is the kickoff to our 2023-

2024 Stewardship Campaign and it’s the perfect opportunity to share this evening of love with others! And once again, Rev. Kelly C. and Sam will host a Truffle-Making Demo live from the Atrium Kitchen! A must-watch how-to for the whole family.

Registration and Meal Kit Details are available on our website: fusmadison.org/valentine/. To get the Isthmus Eats Meal Kit of your choice, please place your order by Saturday, February 4. Our final order date is Wednesday, February 8. If you need help placing your order, please contact me, cheryllm@fusmadison.org. As we all know, making our intentions known is an important way to show we care. Your Meal Kits can be picked up Saturday, February 11, between 11 am and 3 pm, at the Atrium entrance. Music and Truffle-Making links will be in Red Floors and on our Valentine Jazz Soirée poster in the Commons. Questions, please email cheryllm@ fusmadison.org.

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A MONTH OF SERVICES

In-person worship services: Saturdays @ 4:30 pm & Sundays @ 9 & 11 am

Online worship service: Sundays @ 9 am

FEBRUARY 4 & 5

WILLING TO BE CHANGED BY WHAT YOU STARTED

Rev. Kelly Asprooth-Jackson, Co-Senior Minister

Unitarian Universalism describes itself as a living tradition: a faith capable of evolving as the needs of the world change, and as our own understanding of what justice and love demand of us grows. Even the touchstones most frequently used to describe our religion—the Seven Principles — have been changed and rewritten over time. Now we are in the midst of considering, as a movement, a new potential revision. Join us for a service in which we’ll consider what it means to hold a faith with the resilience to change, and examine the new wording that may become a new touchstone for us, if approved by our congregations over the next two years. On Saturday, Teen Choir will sing. On Sunday, Choristers & Cherub Choirs will sing.

FEBRUARY 11 & 12

LOVE PERSEVERING

Rev. Kelly Crocker & Rev. Kelly Asprooth-Jackson, Co-Senior Ministers

For a decade and a half now, Side With Love–our movement’s national social justice campaign–has earned us a happy moniker among some organizers and activists: the Love People. Love has many admirable qualities, but in the struggle for a more just, equitable, and free society, its determination to persist in the face of pain and disappointment may be the most crucial. On the weekend before Valentine’s Day’s celebration of romantic and commercial love, join us for a service to appreciate how love calls us on. Meeting House Chorus will sing.

FEBRUARY 18 & 19

A PEOPLE SO BOLD... AND SO HUMBLE

Rev. Kelly Crocker, Co-Senior Minister

In a world of uncertainty and sudden change, how do we answer the call to who we want to be and how we want to be together? The words of this title come from you, from those of you who submitted thoughts on our community for our Vision and Mission work. There is much that we aspire to be and do in this congregation. We will explore how we live into our hopes and dreams with resilient spirits and resolute hearts. Society Choir will sing Geisler and Brahms.

FEBRUARY 25 & 26 BUT FOLLOW WE MUST!

Rev. Kelly Asprooth-Jackson, Co-Senior Minister

February is African American history month, and our theme here at FUS is Resilience. In this service, we will explore and reflect on figures and episodes from the history of Black Unitarian Universalists, attending to both the painful and the powerful lessons in resilience they provide, and the work of the present and future they call us to. Music by The Red Door Duo: Singer/Songwriter/International Fingerstyle Guitar Champion, Helen Avakian and Dave Irwin, acclaimed jazz, bluegrass, and Brazilian Guitarist/Vocalist.

COMMUNITY INFORMATION

WHEEL OF LIFE

June Johnson passed from this life on December 19. A memorial will be held on March 4 at 11 am in the Landmark Auditorium. June loved music and travel, gardening and photography, and we know her family misses her deeply. We already miss her kind and welcoming presence with us on Sunday mornings.

It is with heavy hearts that we share the news of the passing of Jane Clay on January 3. A memorial service will be held on March 18 at 11 am in the Landmark Auditorium. We send our love to Jane’s family as they miss her warm smile, engaging presence, and generous spirit.

We send our love to Shirley Chosy as she mourns the loss of her husband, Louis Chosy. Louis passed away on January 15, surrounded by his family. Louis’ joy was his children and grandchildren and we know they are missing his caring and generous spirit. A memorial service will be planned for sometime this summer.

If you have a life transition you’d like to share with the readers of this newsletter, please send it to mollyb@fusmadison.org.

CONNECT WITH FUS ONLINE!

Get information about upcoming services and events, see photos and videos, and connect with other FUS folks on our social media platforms!

FUS Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/fusmadison

FUS Community Virtual Gathering Space (FB Group): https://www.facebook.com/groups/fusmadison

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/fusmadison/

Twitter: https://twitter.com/FUSmadison

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/fusmadison

Website: https://fusmadison.org/

COMUNNITY INFORMATION

SPAGHETTI DINNER FUNDRAISER

to benefit Madison Starlings Volleyball

SATURDAY, FEBRUARY 18

5:15 PM

Join us for a delicious spaghetti dinner on Saturday, February 18, at 5:15 pm in the Atrium Commons. The proceeds will go toward funding Madison’s Starlings Volleyball Team, and supports these talented young women in obtaining uniforms and covering other fees that would otherwise be barriers to playing competitive volleyball. A donation of $8 for adults and $5 for children will cover your meal!

Click here to register. With questions, contact Kristi Sprague at kristis@fusmadison. org.

STAFF LEADERSHIP TEAM

Rev. Kelly J. Crocker, Co-Senior Minister kellyc@fusmadison.org x.112

Rev. Kelly Asprooth-Jackson, Co-Senior Minister kellyaj@fusmadison.org x.113

Monica Nolan, Executive Director monican@fusmadison.org x.115

PROGRAM STAFF

Janet Swanson, Director Membership & Adult Programs janets@fusmadison.org x.124

Leslie Ross, Director Children’s Religious Exploration leslier@fusmadison.org x.119

Kristi Sprague, Social Justice Coordinator kristis@fusmadison.org x.125

Xan Hendrick, Program Assistant alexandrah@fusmadison.org x.116

MUSIC STAFF

Dr. Drew Collins, Music Director drewc@fusmadison.org x.121

Heather Thorpe, Children & Youth Choir Director thorpeh2@gmail.com

Linda Warren, Assistant Music Director linda.warren@tds.net

OPERATIONAL STAFF

Molly Backes, Communications Coordinator mollyb@fusmadison.org x. 117

Cheryll Mellenthin, Project Coordinator cheryllm@fusmadison.org x. 130

Tom Miskelly, Facilities Manager tomm@fusmadison.org x. 120

Dan Carnes, A/V & Event Specialist danc@fusmadison.org

Steven Gregorius, Event Specialist

BOARD OF TRUSTEES

Alyssa Ryanjoy, President

Lorna Aaronson

Annelise Alvin

Jennifer Seeker Conroy (President Elect)

Joy Stieglitz Gottschalk

Emily Cusic Putnam

John McGevna, Secretary

Ann Schaffer

LAY MINISTERS

Our lay ministers provide a confidential, caring presence to congregants undergoing stressful life challenges or joyous occasions. Under the guidance of our called ministers, they promote the spirit of community through direct service in visiting the ill and healing, facilitating support groups, and more.