Natasha Ksonzek, pág. 61

Natasha Ksonzek

Natasha Ksonzek is an Artist, writer and publisher in Toronto Canada. She co-authored Closed Entrances: Canadian Culture and Imperialism, with Arnold Itwaru. With him she was also co-organizer of the conference series Racism and National Consciousness at New College, University of Toronto for 16 years. Her MA thesis and forthcoming book entitled “Invisible Imperialism” looks into the normalizing of historical and contemporary racism, occupation, exploitation and cultural domination in museum curating practices in the Royal Ontario Museum and The Museum of History in Hull, Quebec, (formerly The Museum of Civilization). She is publisher of the anti imperialist anti racist press Other Eye Books.She has had many art exhibitions in Toronto, has designed book covers and even a theatre backdrop early on. From 2010-2013 she was one MC for Sunday Poetry at Ellington’s Music and café,and a founding member of The Peoples Poetry Music and Art Festival in Toronto. Her forthcoming poetry book is: “Heartstrong: Poems of the Heart for the People/ Words to see and strengthen by.”

Feeling Lost is a doorway of possibilities Feeling lost could mean that you have loosened the tethers that were holding you in one place, holding you back. Feeling lost could mean that you are seeking new horizons because you outgrew the former conceptions and horizons that were you. Feeling lost could mean that you have left what you outgrew. Feeling lost could mean that you are on the threshold of a new segment of your journey. Feeling lost could be the doorway to you as you dream now, as you see now, as you choose. Now. Feeling lost is better than feeling secure and tied to some blinding status quo. Feeling lost could be an indication that you are freeing yourself. (unbinding) Being true to you And may be in new territory, walking on new ground, in unfamiliarity. Feeling lost is the ground of possibilities opening itself to you. So feeling lost is the entrance to unknowns, the future. It is the pause before the wind changes, bringing different invigoration(s) It isopening to new growth, new potential, new abilities andawarenesses, even new memories. We open our minds to vast expanses We can open our Hearts to affirming vast dimensions of Love We can recognize that we are this too Feeling lost is an outside dimension Find yourself. Ground yourself. By resting in your Heart, Loving who you are, your exquisiteness Living your best you. You are Love You are sacred. Hold this. Be this. You already are. Natasha Ksonzek othereyebooks@gmail.com

On Sacrifice In this culture we are told all the time as an underlying theme, that we have to sacrifice, we have to make sacrifices. We have to sacrifice our best dreams to “make a living,” we have to sacrifice our sovereign self to undergo indoctrination education, to be a ‘good’ person, to obey the state, to “serve” the religious/state values. We are told that Jesus sacrificed himself for the good of the people. In this thinking, sacrifice is adhered to as an honourable way to live, the ‘right’ way. And in this thinking people donot see that they go around with the miniaturized murder weapon hanging around their neck as a sign of religiosity. Jesus the man, if he existed as the story goes, was murdered by the Romans with the help of some insiders. He did not climb up on the cross and nail himself to it. He went against the repressive orders of the day and gave to the people. He broke the hierarchical traditions of excluding healing knowledge and substances from the people; He gave the recipe for the sacred plant healing anointing oil to all: Cannabis, two kinds of cinnamon, myrrh, olive oil. You can add frankincense and turmeric, known as ‘gold’. He overturned the tables of money making that always stole from the people, through trickery, obfuscation and justification. Jesus the man would reverse the state culturally imposed ways requiring the sacrifice of the peoples’ health, minds and sovereignty. He sacrificed obedience to the repressive orders of the day that worked to diminish and impoverish the people. He did this as a living example of transmutation. Transfiguration of want by his love his mind his actions of sincere compassion that necessitated going against the repressive rules imposed by culture state and religion. We can take him down from the cross in our minds and live his example. He wanted nonviolent action for self sovereignty and supportive communality. Notice that the rich and powerful then and now were and are not the ones requiring and practicing the sacrifice of their sovereignty. I therefore invite the rethinking of “Sacrifice.”

Poem: On Sacrifice / Sacrifice in the Path of Transmutation Transformation Reclamation of the sovereign self / The Exorcism of Possession I sacrifice my attachment to the lies of our time I sacrificed the impediments to my growth I sacrificed my relationship to the status quo I sacrifice my acquiescence to the programs of containment I sacrifice the practice of obedience without questioning And the notion of virtue attached to this obedience I sacrifice the programs of stultification learned in the institutions of indoctrination I sacrificed my engagement with mediocrity For I hold close to me and my life doings, The inner visions, of commitment to truth and justice, to Love as a state of being, Love as humanitarianism, Love in action I sacrificed the establishment’s dreams in the purifying fire of my own visions I sacrificed the half-truths of the well-adjusted half-life I sacrificed adherence to family traditions wedded to the conquest capitalist settler culture where one doesn’t express love beyond culture’s borders. I sacrificed the comfort and stultification of the cocooning of me in the normalizing of the white supremacist conquest state’s embrace The embrace of containment that obfuscates reality, history, truth, the expanses beyond the (negating) walls in your mind they trained you to construct I sacrificed dancing to the superficial I sacrificed my requested self sacrifice to the queen, the state and the Christian conquest god I sacrificed my docility, the schooled self negation of me I sacrificed the unthinking life I sacrificed the empty “fun” of cultural entertainment in the entrapment of the mind I sacrificed the sacrificing of my Will and my sight. I exorcise the attempted possessions of me To maintain my sovereign integrity of self transmutation for the freedom to speak and live from my heart and mind and to share with you