Caring for the Caregiver Created by Karyn Baker Family Outreach and Response Program Joan McDonald Family Council
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Who are the caregivers? n n n n
Unpaid, female relatives, average age 60 The vital role that caregivers play cannot be overestimated – they are “the glue that holds the system together” They provide housing, money, companionship and emotional support In Britain, caregivers save the government 3 billion pounds
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Why is Caring for the Caregiver Important? n n n
Reduces Stress for Caregiver More Enjoyment of Life Helps your Relative’s Recovery
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What happens when caregivers don’t care for themselves?
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What happens when caregivers don’t care for themselves? n n n
Lots of difficult feelings such as anxiety, fear, guilt, anger, depression, resentment, sadness, conflict and confusion Caregivers become overwhelmed and immobilized Caregivers aren’t able to manage their daily lives
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What happens when caregivers don’t care for themselves? n n n n
Families become isolated Other family members and friends are ignored Caregiver becomes physically, mentally, intellectually and financially depleted Their ill relative struggles in their recovery
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The Caregiver Experience n n n
Family members are deeply and powerfully interconnected Family dynamics, attitudes and communication do affect the recovery process – creating a “sane environment” or impeding it If one member of a family is in an extreme state, all members of the family will most likely find they are also in an extreme state of some kind in response to the difficult situation and the intense emotions associated with it - it is a difficult journey
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The Caregiver Experience n
No matter how great the stress or turmoil, there are two basic concerns closest to the hearts of most family members: How can I give my relative what he or she needs from me? How can I and the other members of our family survive and flourish in the midst of chaos and heartbreak?
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The Caregiver Experience nď Žâ€Ż
These two basic concerns are completely interrelated and cannot really be addressed separately, because the ability of family members to give to their relative what he or she needs from them will be greatly enhanced if they themselves have a degree of balance and are leading satisfying lives
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What can we do to take care of ourselves? n n
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Attitude: acceptance and respect – wanting change for them but not needing them to change. Accepting where they are at –difficult behavior and all – with holding out hope and the possibility of change, and at the same time non-attachment to the outcome Requires humour, patience and a light handed approach rather than a heavy one. A tall order!
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What can we do to take care of ourselves? n n n n
Choose Happiness – we only have the power to change our own behavior and attitudes Boundaries: Set Limits, Give Space Full Expression: Show Appreciation, Be Honest Find Community
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Coping Tips
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Set aside personal time Put humour, nutrition, physical activity and fun in your life, stay balanced Educate yourself about mental health recovery Reach out to others Be hopeful Be aware of your feelings and triggers
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Come and visit us! Family Outreach & Response
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www.familymentalhealthrecovery.org
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