Life abroad | 57
(Affect, Behaviour, and Cognition). A is for Affect: Pay attention to your feelings What to look out for : Take note when you feel confused, anxious or feel isolated. You might experience the over whelming desire to simply be somewhere else or catch yourself flipping out at relatively minor incidents. Be careful if you notice these red flags appearing at an increasing frequency. Pay attention if your body is screaming at you in the form of sleep or digestive problems, or a dramatic loss of appetite. Letting any of these tendencies go may lead down a dangerous path to depression. Tr y this: take care of your health and well-being: - Focus on your health so you can regain strength and clarity. It is imperative. - Try slowing down how quickly or intensely you dive into the unfamiliar. - Be creative in building ?safe havens? of familiarity once a week. B is for Behaviour : Pay attention to your actions What to look out for : When we are in a new cultural context our ?natural? behaviour may not always fit in. You know this when you come across as awkward or even inappropriate. This can be draining on so many levels. What is simple for the locals ends up requiring a huge extension of your patience or effor t. Going through your days feeling like you are always ?messing up? or that everything you do is a momentous challenge takes a toll. It is time to take note when you notice a dramatic change in your self-confidence or assertiveness. Maybe your leadership style suddenly includes ?giving up? or ?giving in.? You may even find yourself privately making insulting comments about the locals. A downslide in work performance, refusal to speak the local language or a gradual yet increasing dependency on alcohol are all signs to watch out for. Tr y this: seek to understand the ?whys? behind local practices and increase your cultural understanding. Identify
low-risk opportunities for you to try out new behaviours and get feedback. Take detailed notes of what you are learning. Refer to these often to celebrate your progress.
"PAY ATTENTION IF YOUR BODY IS SCREAMING AT YOU IN THE FORM OF SLEEP OR DIGESTIVE PROBLEMS, OR A DRAMATIC LOSS OF APPETITE. " C is for Cognition: Pay attention to your thoughts This is hands down the most complex and least straightforward aspect. You may start feeling worn down and not be able to identify exactly why. Keep in mind that when you are in the middle of adapting to a place that is significantly different from your familiar stomping grounds, you may discover that the way you see the world, how you see yourself or the groups that you belong is being challenged. What to look out for : You suddenly notice that how you have typically seen yourself is not how others see you ? and it troubles you. Maybe you go from thinking of yourself as middle-class to being seen as rich, from being an American to called a ?foreigner?, from a colleague on equal footing to someone of lower (or higher) status. Shifts like these can spur emotions like guilt, shock, confusion or even frustration. Tr y this: Know that when you start grappling with big topics like identity, nationality, poverty, injustice, equality, and generally ?what is right and wrong?, it is a sign that you are developing. - When something new is being presented to you, find out how you can learn from it. - Take the opportunity to learn more about your own culture. What are my main values? My core assumptions? What did I see as ?normal? that isn?t shared by my new community? WWW.EXPATSWORLD.COM