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The future of the Republican Party took over downtown Tampa last weekend as Turning Point USA’s Student Action Summit brought Trump-loyalists like his son Don. Jr., Border Czar Tom Homan, Homeland Security head Kristi Noem, locally-based U.S. Rep. Anna Paulina Luna and others to the convention center. Defense Secretary Pete Hegseth, who recently stopped at MacDill Air Force Base to talk shit about his own troops, was also on the bill along with Trumpendorsed candidate for Florida governor U.S. Rep. Byron Donald. It wasn’t a total Trump-love fest though. The agenda included former Trump acolytes like Steve Bannon and Tucker Carlson who’ve recently decided not to always roll over for the president. Others inside were also openly asking the Epstein question. Nearby at Tampa City Hall on Saturday, protestors rallied against ICE arrests and deportations happening across the U.S.
See all the photos via cltampa.com/slideshows.—Ray Roa
do this
Legacy brunch
Tampa Bay's best things to do from July 17 - 23
Tampa’s Archives Awareness Week will be in full swing by the time doors fly open at this boozy brunch and history talk at one of the city’s oldest venues (members from 1928, pictured). Leading the charge will be Tampeña author and professor Sarah McNamara whose “Latina Legacies” brunch includes free mimosas and a screening of a city-produced short film about Ybor City’s antifascist march mural. Drunk Tampa History headliner Manny Leto is also on the bill (which, in full disclosure, is emceed by Creative Loafing Tampa Bay’s editor-in-chief Ray Roa). The film showcases how the district’s Latinas were the driving force behind activism in the late-1930s. At the time, fascism had become prominent in Spain and was spreading to other areas of the world, but the women of Tampa did what they could to fight back. “The Tampa we have today is in part a result of the work done by those who raise their voices in spaces just like this,” McNamara says in the film.
Latina Legacies: Brunch, Book, and Film Premiere: Saturday, July 19. 11 a.m. No cover, RSVP required. Centro Asturiano de Tampa, 1913 N Nebraska Ave., Tampa. tampabayhistorycenter.org—Jani Burden
Your epidermis is showing Bart Simpson won’t be there, but one of the Bay area’s best-attended, head-turning art festivals returns for its “Naughty Number Nine” edition. Attendees to the adults-only affair can expect their senses to be on high alert as organizers stage live painting, shows and sales complete with food and drinks. VIP tickets come with free drinks, early entry and first chance to buy art.
Skin! Art Show: Friday-Saturday, July 18-19. 6 p.m.-Midnight. $30 & up. South University, 4401 N Himes Ave. Suite 150, Tampa. skinartshow.com Ray Roa
Top of the crop
With the art available for purchase, the art lovers will be happy, but their wallets may not be. The nonprofit Professional Association of Visual Artists (PAVA) presents the art of over 70 of Florida’s most dedicated artists. Some of the award-winning PAVA artists are taking a break from the national circuit to present their art right here in Florida. Art on display will be a mix of paintings, ceramics, photography, metalwork, glass art, fiber art, digital art and jewelry. In addition, the event will also feature a hands-on area where art-lovers can create a masterpiece of their own to hang on the fridge.
PAVA’s 36th Annual Cool Art Show: Saturday, July 19. 10 a.m.-5 p.m. No cover. The Coliseum, 535 4th Ave. N, St. Petersburg. pava-artists.org—Jani Burden
JULY 17-23, 2025 | cltampabay.com
PAVA
Are we there yet?
In these times, it’s best to buy your holiday gifts while you still have money. There’s a party for that happening on two blocks in Seminole Heights. The Far Forest, Disco Dolls Studio, Tiger Dust store and oddities shop, plus Royal Suzie, Sea Maids Creamery, Lucky Cat Yoga, and Florida Avenue Brewing Co. will all be extra merry (but still Floridian) in this just-past-halfway to Christmas celebration. DIY ornaments stations, holiday photo booths, themed libations, and more are in store.
Christmas In July—Seminole Heights: Saturday, July 19. 10 a.m.-9 p.m. No cover. 4200-4300 blocks of N Florida Avenue, Tampa. @TheDiscoDolls on Facebook—Ray Roa
Sour power
Just like your love of a long night out, Margarita Wars roars back to life to kick off the weekend. A staple Tampa party for more than a decade now, Creative Loafing Tampa Bay’s tequila-fueled bash is back at the James Museum where local bartenders and restaurants vie for the title of Tampa Bay’s ultimate margarita. More than two dozen vendors are confirmed including last year’s winner Jotoro—which took the title with a drink featuring banana-infused El Tesoro Reposado, chocolate-infused Cointreau, fresh lime and orange juices, banana and chocolate. Other competitors in 2025 include Fresco’s Waterfront Bistro, Hotel Tampa Riverwalk, Pier Teaki, Tequila Daisy, Hi-Fi Rooftop Bar, Madison Avenue Pizza, The Dan and more. Entrance includes access to the James Museum galleries, plus unlimited margarita samples, light Mexican-inspired bites, photo opportunities and more. Designated driver tickets, for anyone 21 & up, are $30 and include everything above except alcohol. Anyone who buys two regular entries gets one DD ticket for free.
Margarita Wars: Friday, July 18. 6 p.m.-10 p.m. $55 & up. James Museum of Wildlife & Western Art, 150 Central Ave., St. Petersburg. margaritawarstampabay.com— Marleigh Brown
The kids are alright
You don’t have to be a young person to experience the joy that is Girls Rock St. Pete (GRSP). The nonprofit organization kicked off its “Power Week” camp last Tuesday, where girls and gender-expansive youth aged 8-17 formed bands that will hit the big stage at Jannus Live for a showcase concert. The kids learn more than music, obviously, as the camp normalizes the concepts of radical self-care, fearless creativity and building community. And yes, Men are also welcome to support GRSP’s mission as part of the “Dude Crew.” This weekend’s concert includes a silent auction, raffle, trivia, and more, all in support of one of the best things to ever come out of the Sunshine City.
Girls Rock St. Pete concert: Saturday, July 19. 6 p.m.-9 p.m. $10-$25. Jannus Live, 200 1st Ave. N, St. Petersburg. girlsrockstpete.org—Ray Roa
“Knowledge is power… They don’t want people to have power.”
Rebel yell
Grappling with funding cuts, WMNF is asking listeners to join the resistance.
By Ray Roa
As you read this, senators in Washington D.C. are deciding on whether or not they’ll strip $500 million a year from public media— savings that represent less than 0.0001% of the federal budget. Their House colleagues have already approved the measure, and Donald Trump says he’ll retaliate against any Republican who doesn’t approve the cuts. If Senators cave to a president who sees liberal bias in any coverage critical of him, stations across the U.S. will lose out on funds they use to keep the public informed.
“Knowledge is power,” Frost said. “They don’t want people to have power.”
type. “WMNF isn’t simply asking listeners to donate, we are asking them to fight back,” she said.
LOCAL NEWS
Trump’s proposal to cut spending previouslyapproved by Congress is known as a “rescission request,” and a vote is due by the end of the week.
WMNF Tampa 88.5-FM, will lose $130,000 if the vote goes the president’s way—but it won’t be the first punch the Bay area’s 46-year-old community radio station has taken on the chin this summer. Late last month, Florida Gov. Ron DeSantis vetoed $1.3 million in the budget meant for public radio stations, stripping WMNF, like every other public radio station in the state, of $100,000.
This weekend, WMNF—which airs a mix of news and music programming—will hold an emergency fund drive that hopes to cover the $100,000 DeSantis veto. Shari Akram, the station’s marketing and development director, told Creative Loafing Tampa Bay that it will adjust messaging should the federal Corporation for Public Broadcasting (CPB) funding get cut, too. On Saturday, anyone who tunes via 88.5-FM or the online stream will hear the station’s regular programming, with a mix of special messaging from others highlighting the importance of community radio.
Listeners, Akram said, already give to the station an average of five times a year, and the last thing WMNF wants to do is ask them to give more. But this push feels different, she added, because listeners know that the goal with funding cuts at the state and federal level is to silence independent media. That’s a sentiment shared by Florida Congressman Maxwell Frost. Last May, the 28-year-old lawmaker from Orlando appeared on a WMNF public affairs program co-hosted by this reporter to address proposed cuts to public broadcasting.
WMNF General Manager Randi Zimmerman told CL that community radio stations which get CPB funding are the stations with independent voices. Samantha Hval, WMNF’s program director who oversees the music side of the station, added that she, too, is concerned about what happens to a station famous for being the first place that most artists, local and national, hear their music played. “We are supporting, directly, our community and our arts community, in a way that no one else is doing,” Hval said.
Punching back, and being the station’s backbone, is something listeners have been doing since the signal was born in 1979.
There have never been more than a handful of staffers on payroll at WMNF, and its 168 hours of weekly air time are still programmed by volunteers. Since its inception, WMNF has also been majority listener-funded. For example, in FY 2024, according to an independent audit, membership contributions totaled $1.25 million—64% of the total revenue—while the Corporation for Public Broadcasting and other grants accounted for $215,727 or just over 11%.
“We’re the voice of the people. We are a variety of different voices, and they want to silence us. They think that defunding us is going to do that,” Zimmerman said. “And frankly, for smaller stations in more rural areas, that’s exactly what will happen, those stations will be silenced.”
But Akram—who came to WMNF in 2022 after five years serving a similar role at the Florida chapter of the Council on American–Islamic Relations (CAIR)—knows WMNF listeners aren’t the quiet
Still, Zimmerman told CL, the loss of $100,000-$230,000 will lead to hard decisions like holding off on hiring an assistant news director, cutting back on marketing, and delaying efforts to advance the station’s growth in the video. “There’s things that we need to do to stay relevant and current technologically that we’re going to have to put off,” she added.
Sean Kinane, who came to WMNF as a reporter in 2007 and is now Director of News &
Public Affairs, does not look at the loss of state, and potentially federal, funding as a trivial matter. But he pointed to the station’s values and its mission to provide “a platform for diverse voices committed to a more just, peaceful, and sustainable world” in his hope that budget cuts would not affect the newsroom.
“I think the news is so important to our mission that it’s something that you don’t shrink. That’s what Ron DeSantis wants. That’s what Donald Trump wants,” he told CL. “I think WMNF should be fighting back against making changes there and look for cuts other places, or look for more revenue sources.” If local history repeats itself, Kinane might not have to worry.
In 1997, in the wake of heavy airplay for Iris DeMent’s “Wasteland of the Free,” Florida Sen. John Grant helped pass a vote to eliminate $104,000 in state funds earmarked for the station. WMNF had an emergency drive, and in a day-and-a-half more than 1,500 donors answered the call, raising more than $120,000. Zimmerman acknowledged that the political climate isn’t what it was 28 years ago and that it’s been rattling to see CBS, law firms and entities way bigger than WMNF cave in to Trump. And while DeMent’s working-class anthem may be from another era, so many of its lyrics—about corporate cash funding elections and inflated CEO pay—still sadly ring true. In her wasteland, society’s troubles are blamed on the most vulnerable among us.
“The poor have now become the enemy,” she sings. “Sounds like some kind of Hitler remedy—living in the wasteland of the free.” Zimmerman first landed at WMNF shortly after the station’s DeMent debacle, working as a reporter and producer before moving onto Free Speech Radio News and the New York City Department of Education. Now at the helm, she still believes big time in WMNF’s audience.
“We get emails, letters, and phone calls from people who tell us that we have literally changed the course of their lives. We make their lives better,” she told CL. “I think our community is going to continue to speak truth to power, but I think some of that is going to be a little bit harder than it used to be.”
Tea time
Tate in, Gudes out, as race for Tampa City Council seat takes shape.
By Ray Roa
Candidates who want to represent Tampa’s District 5 better be ready to connect in a serious way when Candy Lowe and Jarvis El-Amin host another installment of Tea & Conversation. “We want to know what their cell phone numbers are so we can call them,” Lowe, organizer of Tampa’s Black Business Bus Tour, told Creative Loafing Tampa Bay.
For more than two decades, she’s brought together candidates and electeds to talk to her community, and she wants to know that whoever wins in the upcoming special election will come back to the forum.
“We have a number of candidates that have been coming for years, and they do return back, but we have a lot of them that never return back, and I keep my eye on them,” Lowe added.
Tampa Community CRA Advisory Board, told CL in an email, pointing to her 35 years spent founding and then leading the Jackson Heights Neighborhood Association. “I’ve repeatedly been before the Tampa City Council on transit, redevelopment, housing and the budget working to help the people of District 5.”
According to the Hillsborough County Supervisor of Election, Danley leads the fundraising charge with over $13,200 reported as of press time. Colbert, of “Selling Tampa” fame, has collected over $8,390 and is the only other candidate who’s reported any fundraising.
ELECTIONS
Tea & Conversation:
Tampa City Council
District 5 roll call
Next Saturday, July 26. 10 a.m.-noon. No cover.
Al’s Finger Licking Good Soul Food. 2302 E 7th Ave., Ybor City
It’ll be a packed house for Lowe’s next candidate roll call happening later this month at Al’s Finger Licking Good Soul Food in Ybor City. So far, 13 candidates have applied to run for the seat, and anyone who shows up will get a chance to introduce themselves and their platforms, talk about their history in East Tampa and answer questions from voters.
Former Tampa City Councilman Orlando Gudes recently dropped out over what he called a potential conflict over his district residency status, but the race—happening after the tragic passing of Councilwoman Gwen Henderson last month—still has 12 active candidates who hope to qualify before the first ballot gets to voters in September.
Henderson’s daughter, Ariel Amirah Danley, is among those candidates along with Realtor Juawana Colbert, Crowbar owner Tom DeGeorge, and Central Economic Development Center Executive Director Alison A. Hewitt.
With just over a year left on her Henderson’s term, legacy will play a big part in the conversations about who’s best fit to represent the district, which stretches west-toeast from Tampa to parts of the end of Broadway Avenue and north-south between parts of Riverhills to Harbour Island
In an email to CL, Danley said that off the dais, Henderson and her would talk about accountability and ensuring residents felt the impact of city decisions in their day-to-day lives.
“On the dais, she was especially passionate about protecting legacy neighborhoods, addressing food deserts, supporting small businesses, and ensuring that CRA dollars stayed in the community to tackle slums and blight,” Danley, 35, wrote, adding that given the opportunity, she would continue that work and remain committed to transparency and neighborhood investment.
“You never understand what that seat is about until you sit in it.”
Former Tampa City Councilman and Hillsborough County Commissioner Thomas Scott is also in the field along with Naya Almaz Yong, the former Executive Director of the Tampa Heights Junior Civic Association, whose career in politics started when she was a teenager canvassing for former Sen. James Hargrett and Rep. Betty Reed.
Lifelong Tampa politico Fran Tate is another recent addition to the race.
“My volunteer work in this community runs deep and wide,” Tate, a member of the East
Bookstore, took a minute to acclimate to the process and politics of the office but really started to shine in the months before her passing.
Danley also wants to get more young people and working families involved in the political process “so they see local government as something that’s for them, not just something that happens to them.”
Last week on WMNF public affairs program
The Skinny, Robin Lockett said she wants whoever fills Henderson’s seat to be “fearless.”
Lockett—Regional Director of Florida Rising, a statewide, people-powered organization made up of members advancing economic and racial justice across Florida—knows a thing or two about city council, where she appears weekly. She also ran for the District 2 seat in 2023, pushing a very popular incumbent, Guido Maniscalco, to a runoff despite getting into the race just 90 days before the election.
Lockett noticed that Henderson, a lifelong educator and founder of Tampa’s Black English
“She had a voice, and she made it be known if she really was passionate about something,” Lockett added about the late legislator. “She asked the important questions, and she wouldn’t back down. I was excited to see what type of Councilwoman she would have become.”
District 5 is also Tampa’s only majorityminority district, and as far as CL knows, has never been represented by someone who wasn’t Black.DeGeorge, his fellow Ybor City business owner Darrell Ashley Dudney, and Audette Bruce, a campus pastor at Revive Churc, are the only non-Black candidates running for the seat.
Lowe told CL that talking about race does somewhat distract from the issues, and acknowledges that the district has become more diverse. She would prefer the seat be taken by a Black person, but is OK if that doesn’t happen. Lockett, too, said the district is diverse, but told WMNF that she would also like to see a Black person in the seat.
“Not having that representation on that board, that would be a shame,” she said, adding
that she’s looking forward to the forums and hearing from the candidates. “When the questions come and the lights are on, we’ll see who prevails and is semi-fit for the job—because you never understand what that seat is about until you sit in it.”
The special election for Tampa’s District 4 City Council seat ends on Sept. 9, with early voting running Sept. 4-7. The deadline to register to vote is Aug. 11. If no candidate receives more than 50% of the vote, a runoff election will be held Oct. 28. Anyone who wants to vote by mail must ask the Hillsborough Supervisor of Elections for a mail ballot.
To officially qualify for the special election ballot, according to the city charter, applicants must pay a qualifying fee equal to 5% of the salary (roughly $3,750). A fact sheet from the Hillsborough County Supervisor of Elections points out that the qualifying fee would be $4,511.52 because an additional 1% election assessment is required by the State of Florida. Another way to qualify is to submit petition signatures from 0.25% of the population of the city of Tampa by Aug. 1.
FRAN’S PLAN: Fran Tate, a lifelong Tampa politico, wants that D5 seat.
Saturday, August 16 · 5 - 8pm 2009 N 22nd Street, Tampa, FL
“The politics of today are very different and the political landscaping is changing.”
Primary question
Nikki Fried’s staff is collecting data on letting NPAs into the election process.
By Mitch Perry/Florida Phoenix
With the Florida Democratic Party looking for creative ways to break through to voters in a state that’s become a GOP stronghold, Chair Nikki Fried wants party members to consider opening their primary elections to nonparty-affiliated voters, possibly as early as next year.
Fried and her staff are collecting information to present to party members about the proposal. There is no set date when she will present that information, but she expects to act in the near future.
“That is determinative on how long this process takes and what the feedback is,” Fried said. “I certainly believe that this is the right direction, but I don’t live on an island.”
Fried is aware that “not everyone in the party is going to feel that this is the right
approach.” However, she does believe that the “vast majority” of Democrats, independents, and the electorate overall “believes that this is the right direction for party politics.”
“The politics of today are very different and the political landscaping is changing,” she said.
The proposal is controversial, based on some of the responses the Phoenix has heard from Florida Democrats over the past week. While some longtime members have been espousing such a move for years, others believe it’s the last thing the party should do as it struggles to regain prominence following a surge in Republican voter registration and electoral wins over the past five years.
Fried initially spoke about the proposal in an interview with Scripps Florida State Capitol reporter Forrest Saunders in May, but several
state Democrats told the Phoenix they had no idea how serious the party chair was about the idea until she brought it during the party’s Leadership Blue conference last month in Hollywood.
Concern from critics
“I am very concerned about moving to do that, opening our primaries right now, primarily because it will bring about very divisive conversations within the Democratic Party here in Florida,” said Samuel Vilchez Santiago, the Orange County Democratic Party Chair.
NON-PARTY TIME?
Nikki expects to present data on opening the primary up in the near future.
Walton County Democratic Executive Committee Chair and Democratic National Committee (DNC) member Samantha HopeHerring is adamantly opposed, calling the idea “insanity.”
“At the end of the day, people just don’t see a reason to be a Democrat, and certainly won’t if we say, ‘You know what? We’re going to let everybody vote over here so, whatever you want to do, it doesn’t matter, we’re just going to roll with it, see how it goes.’ I mean, what kind of field day is that for Republicans?” she said.
ELECTIONS
“Right now we need to be focused on responding and leading our community to Donald Trump’s budget, talking about the cuts he’s doing to Medicaid, impacting close to a million Floridians. The cuts to FEMA and to SNAP benefits; his mass deportation [plan]. How the Republicans have created an affordability crisis in this state after having been empowered with one-party rule for 30 years, and this is not the time to divide the party.”
“I’m against this,” added former Hillsborough County state Rep. Sean Shaw, the party’s nominee for attorney general in 2018 and also a member of the DNC. “I know what the aim is, and I know why people think it’s a good idea, but we ought to just concentrate on winning elections as the rules are right now, rather than trying to do all of these other things that are going to have really bad unintended consequences.”
continued on page 24
Shaw knows the issue well. As head of the nonprofit People Over Profits in 2020, his group argued against a proposed constitutional amendment that would have allowed open primaries, claiming it would disproportionately hurt Black and brown candidates. That measure differed somewhat from what Fried is proposing because it proposed a “Top-Two” or “jungle primary,” allowing the top two finishers running for certain state and legislative seats to advance against each other in the general election, even if they were from the same political party.
Both the Democratic and Republican parties of Florida strongly opposed that at the time, but the idea resonated with voters, gaining 57% approval. While a clear majority, it failed to reach the 60% required for passage.
Terrie Rizzo was chair of the FDP leading up to that 2020 vote. She recounted this week that her opposition was truly the only thing she and thenRepublican Party of Florida Chair Joe Gruters could agree about. Without elaborating, she said her stance hasn’t changed.
Although the numbers can vary depending on how you define your terms, Florida is one of only 10 states that does not open its primary elections to anyone outside their respective party members, according to the National Conference on State Legislatures (NCLS).
That’s significant because the 25% of the state’s electorate who choose to be politically independent (or nonpartyaffiliated, in Florida election parlance) are banned from participating in those elections. Another 3% of state voters are registered with third-parties and are excluded from participating in Democratic and Republican primary elections. Seven states open their primary elections to unaffiliated voters, also according to the NCSL.
System ‘isn’t working’
have to, but we give them that option, and it forces our candidates to talk to more voters. I’m 100% for that.”
Former Miami Beach Mayor and former Democratic House Leader Dan Gelber has been an advocate for open primaries for years. He wrote a letter to then-FDP Chair Manny Diaz more than three-and-half years ago, and followed up with a similar missive to Fried in March, noting how voters unaffiliated with the two major political parties are shut out of the process.
racial and ethnic groups, “especially Latinos and Asians, are lower on average in open and nonpartisan primaries than closed primaries.”
It did not track how minority candidates fared in open primary races, however.
ELECTIONS
“Reaching out to these voters makes all the sense in the world,” he wrote. “Nearly thirty percent of all voters are unaffiliated independents, who don’t receive a single piece of mail, or phone call, or door knock until the primaries are decided. Adopting these measures will broaden our reach and incentivize our candidates to lis-
“What we’re doing now clearly isn’t working.”
Democratic 2026 gubernatorial candidate David Jolly, who was a nonparty-affiliated voter in Florida for the past seven years until he became a registered Democrat earlier this year, also supports Fried’s exploration, saying “it reflects bold leadership.”
“There’s no greater way to introduce independents and minor party members to Democratic values than to invite them in the tent,” he said in a text message. “In my experience, independents are smart voters who believe deeply in changing our politics — that is also the central tenet of today’s Democratic Party. I think there’s a natural affinity.”
unilaterally open its primaries to independent voters (NPAs),” Rank My Vote Florida executive director Ramon Perez wrote in an email to his members last week.
“We’re working on this with a coalition of nonprofits that represent Florida’s diverse communities,” he wrote, adding that the group had “helped craft public statements of support” from the League of Women Voters of Florida, Veterans for All Voters, and Alianza for Progress (Perez did not respond to request for comment).
“All registered Florida voters deserve the opportunity to participate in primary elections and make their voices heard,” said League President Jessica Lowe-Minor in a written statement. “Closed primaries unfairly disenfranchise millions of voters, particularly independent and NPA voters, and contribute to political extremism. Any effort to reform our primary system to meaningfully increase voter participation and access is welcome.”
While the critics aren’t being shy in their opposition, other Democrats support the idea. Democratic political strategist Steve Schale is “all for” the proposal. “It’s never a bad thing when you are trying to build a broader coalition in a state that you’ve been struggling in,” he said.
“What we’re doing now clearly isn’t working,” Schale said. “In my mind, what is the harm of trying a system where we allow independents to choose to vote in our primary? They don’t
ten and interact with a more diverse group of the electorate.”
Both Gelber and Schale say they take seriously concerns the shift could hurt minority candidates. But Schale isn’t aware of “these huge parade of places where the community hasn’t gotten a voice that they want based on the way the district’s drawn, if that makes sense.”
A study published last fall by the Bipartisan Policy Center reported that turnout gaps among
The ultimate decision rests with the broader party committee, Jolly said, “and I trust their judgement and will support their decision.”
Other groups show support
Rank My Vote Florida, a statewide organization best known for advocating for ranked-choice voting (which was banned in Florida in 2022), is actively behind the proposal. “We’ve been advocating for the Florida Democratic Party (FDP) to
Although there remains some question whether the state of Florida would legally challenge the switch, Gelber noted that the U.S. Supreme Court addressed the issue in 1986 in Tashjian v. Republican Party of Connecticut. The high court ruled states cannot impose a closed primary system because it would deny the political party its right under the First and Fourteenth Amendments to enter political association with individuals of its own choosing.
“We’re taking this process and trying to get as many viewpoints as possible,” Fried said. “Those people who decide to shut down the conversation without hearing the data and understanding the moment are living in an old-time political system.
“Times today are very different. And so it would be irresponsible of me to not bring this conversation to the Democratic Party … and so we want to make sure that we’re doing it right. We’re doing it methodically. We’re getting as many different viewpoints as possible, and ultimately the party executive meeting will dictate whether or not we move forward.”
That meeting has yet to be scheduled. Florida Phoenix is part of States Newsroom, a nonprofit news network supported by grants and a coalition of donors as a 501c(3) public charity. Florida Phoenix maintains editorial independence. Contact Editor Michael Moline for questions: info@floridaphoenix.com.
AGES AGO: Nikki Fried says those shutting down ideas are living in an old-time political system.
DAVE DECKER
RESTAURANTS RECIPES DINING GUIDES
Staying awhile
Brandon’s new viral vegan spot, and more food news.
By Jani Burden and Marleigh Brown
We’ve all heard “Welcome to Moe’s,” but at Slutty Vegan employees greet you in the only way they know how: “Hey slut.” After some ownership struggles earlier this year, the Atlanta-born, plant-based burger restaurant opened its ninth brick-and-mortar on July 5 at 2080 Badlands Dr. in the Tampa exurb of Brandon.
Tampa’s no stranger to Slutty Vegan either, with the concept hosting 2024 pop-ups in Ybor City and Brandon.
CEO of The Slutty Vegan, Pinky Cole, started the business in 2018 by taking orders through Instagram and delivering them from her mobile food truck. The 37-year-old opened her first brick and mortar location in Atlanta in 2019. It now has several locations in Georgia, plus others in Birmingham, Brooklyn, and Baltimore.
Cole told People Magazine that the business had become too large and she began delegating leadership to others for more support, however, things didn’t exactly go the way she planned. She was in a freak accident on one of Atlanta’s busy highways when a mattress hit her windshield while she was going 70 mph. She told People that this “final destination” incident forced her to take a break from business and reflect. On March 28, she bought back the business and learned a valuable lesson. “You can never take your hands off the wheel,” she said.
An adult Chuck E. Cheese, ‘Chuck’s Arcade,’ is now open in St. Pete
Since the 1980s, Chuck E. Cheese has used “where a kid can be a kid” as its main slogan, but the chain’s new St. Petersburg concept— Chuck’s Arcade—is a place where adults can be kids, too.
After Chuck E. Cheese first opened in 1977, it assembled over 450 locations across the U.S., but there are now 10 Chuck’s Arcade locations, including one at 6901 22nd Ave. N, which was the home of the Fun Spot at Tyrone Square Mall.
While Chuck’s Arcade, which opened in June, doesn’t offer a ticket blaster or a slightly disturbing band like its counterpart, the arcade offers a mixture of retro games like “Dig Dug,” “Centipede” and “Asteroids”—along with modern games and even VR experiences.
OPENINGS & CLOSINGS
Chuck’s is taking after one of Chuck E.Cheese’s newer updates and will use game cards instead of paper tickets, and while the process may be easier and more timely, you can’t deny the heartbeat the ticket munchers used to bring to the old school Chuck E. Cheese’s.
Unlike Chuck E. Cheese, there is no alcohol at Chuck’s Arcade, according to Atlanta Journal-Constitution.
Pinellas County’s first Dutch Bros is on the way, and traffic could be, too
West Coast coffee chain Dutch Bros is taking over the West Gulf Coast with a third Tampa Bay location in the works.
From A-town to Tampa Bay, the viral restaurant offers burgers loaded with toppings, slutty fries loaded with their famous slut dust seasoning and even have a vegan pulled brisket sandwich. The “One Night Stand” includes Slutty Strips vegan bacon, vegan cheese, LTO, and Slut Sauce on a vegan Hawaiian bun. In addition to its physical locations, Slutty Vegan stuck with its roots and has a food truck that attends pop-up events around the U.S. On top of its brick and mortar locations, the restaurant sells its “slutty strips” (otherwise known as bacon), slut dust seasoning, and spinach and artichoke and hot-lanta buffalo cheese dips at Target.
Mark Kupferman, Executive Vice President, Chief Insights & Marketing Officer of CEC Entertainment, told St. Pete Catalyst that Chuck’s Arcade brand gears locations toward the older crowd. “We didn’t want to confuse anybody. We didn’t want to, for example, put Chuck E. Cheese in the name per se. We didn’t want little kids showing up because the games are really for older kids and adults,” he added.
Worry not, however, each Chuck’s will feature an animatronic character that once dwelled in the pizza-scent ridden Chuck E. Cheese.
Chucks is expanding quickly with a location coming to Brea, CA soon and already has locations in Trumbull, Connecticut; Oklahoma City, Oklahoma; Tulsa, Oklahoma; Victor, New York; Buford, Georgia; El Paso, Texas; Nashua, New Hampshire; Salem, New Hampshire; and Kansas City, Missouri.
After opening a location in South Tampa earlier this year and announcing a Riverview address, Largo is getting its own double drivethru, which is a feature that only about 15% of Dutch Bros. locations have.
Sitework was approved last month for its spot at 2250 East Bay Drive, per the Tampa Bay Business Journal. Construction permits for the proposed 967-square-foot building, valued at $600,000, have been pending since February.
Known for its friendly service and straw theory, Dutch Bros. offers a wide variety of customizable drinks such as blended frozen coffees, energy drinks, lemonades and milkshakes.
Along with coffee, Dutch Bros may bring additional traffic to the area. The location south of Gandy has caused lots of congestion around the area with the drive-thru line taking up one side of a two-lane road. Even die-hard Dutch Bros fans aren’t fond of the double lanes.
Grove Surf and Coffee is back in St. Pete Beach nine months after Hurricane Helene floods Lindsey and Peter Gottschling thought their hardest challenge would be 2020. The couple had everything ready for the grand opening of Grove Surf and Coffee that March, but COVID lockdowns came the day they were supposed to open their doors. Four years later, an even bigger challenge came in the form of floodwaters. Hurricane Helene destroyed the store, forcing the couple to close it for 256 days. Now, they’re ready to greet customers again.
The shop at 7370 Gulf Blvd. reopened in St. Pete Beach last May, eight-and-a-half months after Hurricane Helene flooded the shop with 36 inches of water.
After more than 200 grueling days of waiting for insurance and permits while ripping out soaked wood, the Gottschlings and a team of friends brought the beloved coffee shop and surf apparel store back to life.
“Lindsay insisted that we get flood insurance, and I gave in to her. And one of the better, I mean, probably the best business decisions,” Peter told Creative Loafing Tampa Bay.
OLD FAITHFUL: Slutty Vegan’s ‘One Night Stand’ burger has a permanent Tampa home. continued on page 32
PIZZA BY THE SLICE DAILY
continued from page 29
The couple still operates its sister location, Grove Surf Cafe, which has been running for about a year in Indian Rocks Beach.
For more on the reopening as well as seasonal updates, follow @grovesurfandcoffee on Instagram.
Churned Ice Cream opens brick-and-mortar scoop shop in St. Pete Enthusiasts of ice cream and Benson Boone can now get the best of both worlds in St. Petersburg.
Churned, which named a flavor after one of Boone’s recent singles, soft-launched its brickand-mortar at 5504 Haines Rd. N on June 23.
Steve Tishman has been running the hard ice cream and popsicle shop as a pop-up around the St. Pete area since September, after buying it from Alyssa and Ray Wyatt. The Wyatts started Churned in 2021.
something that glittered, that had that nighttime sky aspect to it, and that also had a little bit of lightness.”
This pint-sized pleasure is ube ice cream with marshmallow fluff swirls, black cocoa cookies, marshmallow bits (like in hot chocolate), and a sprinkle of edible glitter. They also have ice pop flavors like: banana cream pie, puddin pop and cosmopolitan. For events, there are ice cream cakes and even ice cream cakes for dogs.
Not only can you get a sweet treat for your pooch, but 10% of Churned’s earnings on regular flavors go to Pet Pal Animal Shelter. For more updates on Churned’s grand opening and pop-ups, follow @churned_icecream on Instagram.
OPENINGS & CLOSINGS
While the hard launch has not been officially set, Tishman is selling pints of more than 30 flavors. Once he gets a dipping cabinet, he’ll start selling scoops and mixed-flavor pints.
Even with names like Lucky Charms and Key Lime Pie, Tishman’s custard is made with only five ingredients—“nothing you can’t pronounce.” Churned also does private and corporate events, where customers can make their own flavors.
What’s the scoop on Benson Boone? Crafted as an homage to one of the pop star’s newest songs, “Mystical Magical,” Churned created “Moonbeam Ice Cream” for a segment on WFLA’s Daytime Show.
“We listened to the song over and over again. It’s an earworm,” Tishman told CL. “We needed
The Studio Public House closing after four years in St. Pete
After being open in St. Pete for four years, British-inspired restaurant and pub The Studio Public House will close this summer.
Chef and owner Mike Crippen announced its closing last month social media, and mentioned that the landlord decided not to renew the contract.
Crippen opened the space at 2950 Central Ave. in 2021, shortly after the closing of Moon Under Water, where he was executive chef. The Studio got its name from the building’s history as a recording studio for local musicians.
A closing date has not been announced. While he looks for a new location, Crippen is still serving customer favorites like fish and chips, curry potato volcano and the Bollywood chicken curry.
“Please support our staff if there are jobs available and listen out for new spots or options for us,” he wrote in the announcement.
PARKING SPOT: Churned Ice Cream has popped-up all over St. Pete since September.
“We want to be the place that kind of reminds people that we’ve got homegrown talent, too.”
MOVIES THEATER ART CULTURE
Moving on up
Tampa Arts Alliance secures new downtown office space.
By Ray Roa
For almost half-a-decade now, the Tampa Arts Alliance has worked to help put the local art scene on the global map—and now the nonprofit might have a new place to call its home.
Last Tuesday, the alliance’s Executive Director Michele Smith said that the group has the opportunity to move into a ground floor office just across the street from Lykes Gaslight Square in downtown Tampa.
The space—valued at $1 million and donated by Boston-based commercial real estate investor Farley White Interests—is at the corner of Kennedy Boulevard and Tampa Street and puts the alliance in the emergent heart of the city.
work of local artists and organizations, inspiring connection and collaboration across the arts scene, and activating public space with art that everyone can enjoy.
But moving in is not a give-in.
Smith said Farley White Interests wants her group to build the space out so that it matches the rest of the 44-year-old, 281,187-square-foot Class
LOCAL ARTS
“There’s just so much synergy,” Smith told Creative Loafing Tampa Bay about the location of the 5,000-square-foot space at the bottom of the Fifth Third Fifth Third Center.
According to the Tampa Downtown Partnership’s development guide, the neighborhood has approximately 65,000 daily workers and 23,600 residents—and that’s not counting more than a dozen developments in the works right now.
So many artists live in pockets within West Tampa and Ybor City, but the density of people just isn’t that high yet, Smith told CL, adding that, “What we’re trying to do is make sure that where there’s this density of people, that the artists are represented and seen.”
Tampa Art Alliance’s potential new home gives the organization a chance to pull people in off downtown streets, before telling them to take a trolley over to Ybor City where they can visit the Kress Collective, Marcolina’s Fine Arts Gallery, the Florida Museum of Photographic Arts or Factory on Fifth. Visitors and residents would also be encouraged to go further down the Tampa Riverwalk to experience the public art in West Tampa.
“We want to kind of be like a heart—literally, a heart muscle—that’s pulling the people in and then pushing them out to all these places, and increasing the visibility of regional art,” Smith said. “We have some world class institutions that bring in a lot of talent from other places. And we want to be the place that kind of reminds people that we’ve got homegrown talent, too.”
A press release says that the arts center will focus on three main goals: showcasing the
A tower and becomes an amenity for downtown itself.
“We’re not just going to go into a raw space and throw up some art,” she explained.
So together with the Beck commercial construction and architecture group, Tampa Arts Alliance is working to design a flexible venue with ceiling railings to accommodate moveable walls that can not only act as gallery space, but be moved to accommodate large groups for events.
“Part of the condition is that we need to be able to act quickly now that we have the
commitment of space,” Smith said, adding that the rent is about $250,000 a year.
That’s why Tampa Arts Alliance has launched a new capital campaign that hopes to raise $1.2 million by Nov. 1 to help cover that first year of rent and buildout.
Smith told CL that one of the alliance’s board members, Wade Vaughn of Strategic Property Partners and Water Street, is working with his connections to keep the process on budget.
For the rest of the summer, Smith plans to have face-to-face meetings in her effort to raise funds, but hopes to have a fundraising event in the fall.
“We haven’t even launched yet, and we do have two pledges already, which is really great,” she said about the progress.
Tampa Arts Alliance’s new development comes two years after the nonprofit secured a site in Ybor City meant to host affordable artist housing developed by Artspace, the nation’s leading nonprofit developer of arts facilities.
The alliance’s agreement with Artspace called for the group to find the land and raise $750,000.
Smith told CL that the 23,000 square-feet of land donated by a local developer is still there and theirs—and that much of the space around
1610 E 3rd Ave. has seen approximately $187 million of investment thrown at it since then.
“We delivered $2.5 million worth of land that Darryl Shaw has committed,” she said. “And we delivered $200,000 in cash and another $550,000 in contracts.”
Smith said that $50,000 of the contracts comes from Hillsborough County, while $500,000 will come from the City of Tampa. Both the county and city will have to finalize the agreements, which Smith said have already been approved ahead of additional readings.
She added that once ArtSpace projects delivers what they need to deliver to complete those contracts, they get that money and can then apply for housing credits from the federal government.
“We’ve delivered everything we said we were going to deliver for the project, and that’s a good position,” Smith said.
That leaves her in a place to look ahead, but as Smith works towards making Tampa Arts Alliance’s new downtown home a reality, she wants local artists to remember why the organization exists.
“We are really putting forth some work to get them seen and get them known,” she said. “Because we have so much talent here.”
IF YOU BUILD IT: Tampa Arts Alliance is working with Beck to design its new space.
Rain it in
23 Florida native plants anyone can use for a summer rain garden.
By Vicki Parsons/Bay Soundings
For most Tampa Bay residents, protecting our lakes, streams and bay from stormwater pollution means changing bad habits like over-fertilizing, blowing leaf and lawn litter into storm drains, or not scooping poop behind our pets. But some homeowners can take that commitment a step further and start capturing rain before it turns into stormwater, either with rain barrels or in rain gardens that thrive in wet spots.
Stormwater is the largest single source of pollution in Tampa Bay. Rain that doesn’t absorb into the ground travels along paved surfaces into nearby storm drains before entering local waterways, picking up debris and other pollutants along the way. It carries nutrients that fuel the growth of algae, which block sunlight from reaching the bay bottom where seagrasses need it to survive. Stormwater can also fuel the growth of toxic algae like red tide or the Pyrodinium blooms that turn much of Old Tampa Bay rusty red nearly every summer.
several inches of rain in a severe thunderstorm, so that rain garden should be designed to hold three or more inches of rain.”
• If the soil is sandy, the rain will be absorbed more quickly. Also, plants with more leaves will soak up more water through transpiration than smaller plants or those with fewer leaves. For more capacity where there is no room to expand, rain gardens can be supplemented with dry wells.
“Plan the rain garden so that water soaks in, is absorbed by the rain garden plants, or can drain away in three days or less to keep the mosquitoes at bay,” she writes.
ENVIRONMENT
Although most people don’t realize it, stormwater is seldom treated before it’s discharged into the nearest body of water, so it’s up to residents to capture what they can before it leaves our yards. One option is rain gardens that are low spots where rainwater has a chance to soak in before it washes away.
Ginny Stibolt, the author of many books on sustainable gardening in Florida including the “Art of Maintaining a Native Landscape” has planned and planted several rain gardens and has these tips:
• The ideal size of a rain garden depends on how large an area will drain into it and how permeable the garden will be. Stibolt explains: “If you’re draining a 1000-square-foot roof, and the size of the rain garden is limited to 200 square feet, your rain garden should be five inches deep (1,000 divided by 200) to hold an inch of rain. But here in Florida, we can expect
Herbaceous Plants
Black-eyed Susan (Rudbeckia hirta)
Blue-eyed grass (Sisyrinchium angustifolium)
Climbing aster (Symphyotrichum carolinianum)
“Stormwater is the largest single source of pollution in Tampa Bay.”
Sometimes, large rain garden projects are built around existing storm drains or swales. When this happens, dig out space for the rain garden so that most of the rain can collect below the level of the drain. This way, water will enter the storm drain only occasionally during severe storm events. If this project includes county or other municipal drain infrastructure, be sure to get the required permits before you start.
Designing a rain garden in Florida is challenging because plants need to tolerate both flooding and drought—some spots that are underwater during summer thunderstorms may be as dehydrated as a desert during a hot dry season.
Stibolt recommends choosing native plants to enhance the garden’s ability to support wildlife, particularly native bees and birds.
Using native plants in Florida rain gardens doubles the benefits to our ecosystems by minimizing the impact of stormwater and providing critical habitat to wildlife. For the Stibolt’s full article on rain gardens, visit sky-bolt.com.
Look below for her recommended list of rain garden herbaceous plants, plus trees and shrubs; find links to their Florida Native Plant Society plant profiles with more information, and to Stibolt’s articles on them, if available, via baysoundings.com.
Dotted horsemint or spotted beebalm (Monarda punctata)
Fakahatchee grass or eastern gama grass (Tripsacum dactyloides)
Meadow beauty (Rhexia spp.)
Meadow garlic (Allium canadense)
Mistflower or blue mistflower (Conoclinium coelestinum)
Muhly grass (Muhlenbergia capillaris)
Netted Chain Fern (Woodwardia areolata)
Rain lily (Zephyranthes atamasca)
Starrush Whitetop or white-topped sedge (Rhynchospora colorata)
Maples (Acer spp.) particularly the red maple (A. rubrum)
Salt bush, Groundsel Tree, Sea Myrtle (Baccharis halimifolia)
This post first appeared on Bay Soundings.
MAKES SCENTS: Meadow garlic (Allium canadense).
August 23, 2025
ON VIEW NOW THROUGH SEPTEMBER 21
FRIDAY, JULY 25 | 6-9 PM
THE INS AND OUTS
VOL. 1 WITH SAPPHIC SUN
Join us for the first event in a bold new series inspired by the work and legacy of pioneering feminist artist Nina Yankowitz. This 21+ evening blends art, conversation, and community over an open bar and delicious bites, diving into themes that defined Nina’s career—activism, collaboration, and creative resistance. Heresies: Art, Politics & Intersectionality features The Sapphic Sun, a new locally printed, countercultural publication echoing the spirit of Heresies, the groundbreaking feminist magazine collective Nina co-founded in the late 1970s. Through pop-up demos, a panel discussion, and hands-on writing prompts, contributors from The Sapphic Sun will explore the intersections of politics, identity, and print culture—past and present.
2025 Tampa Bay Sigmas Conclave Events 2 @ 1920 Ybor
1920 East 7th Avenue
Tickets from $$44.52 bit.ly/TampaSigmasConclave
Saturday, July 19, 2025 • 11:00 AM - 2:00 PM
Latina Legacies: Brunch, Book & Film Premiere w/ Dr. Sarah McNamara @ Centro Asturiano de Tampa 1913 North Nebraska Avenue
Open to the Public bit.ly/LatinLegaciesYbor
Saturday, July 19, 2025 • 11:00 AM - 2:00 PM
MatchaFest™ Tampa @ The Cuban Club 2010 North Avenida Republica de Cuba
Starts at $9.32 bit.ly/MatchaFest
Sunday, July 20, 2025 • 11:00 AM - 12:15 PM
Chicken Yoga with Yoga Loft Tampa and Ybor Misfits @ Hotel Haya 1412 East 7th Avenue
$14.64 General Admission bit.ly/ChickenYoga
Sunday, July 20, 2025 • 3:00 PM - 6:00 PM
Kaftan Summer Soiree Bar Crawl @ Showbar Ybor 1613 East 7th Avenue
$23.18 General Admission bit.ly/KaftanSummerSoiree
Sunday, July 20, 2025 • 9:00 PM - 2:00 AM
Church SESSIONS With DJ Qeys And DJ Shines @ Crowbar
1812 N 17th St Tampa
$5 Cover crowbarybor.com/calendar/#/events
Saturday, July 26, 2025 • 1:00 PM - 4:00 PM
SPARKLE & SIP EARRING WORKSHOP
@ Ybor City Society Wine Bar 1600 East 7th Avenue
$53.61 General Admission bit.ly/SparkleAndSip
Monday, July 28, 2025 • 5:00 PM - 8:00 PM
Step Into History with Stairway for Heroes, One Brick at a Time! @ Tampa Baseball Museum 2003 North 19th Street
$23.18 General Admission bit.ly/StepIntoHistory
Try Out These Restaurants:
(Don’t forget to VOTE for your favorite Ybor City restaurants @ vote.cltampa.com)
La Segunda Bakery 2512 North 15th Street lasegundabakery.com
LARA - Apothecary Bar & Bazaar 1919 E 7th Ave, Tampa tampalara.com
Chateau Cellars 2009 N 22nd Street chateaucellars.com
Where to Live:
Casa Ybor
Casa Ybor offers unique retail spaces, office spaces, and apartment homes for rent or lease in both newly constructed and lovingly restored historic buildings throughout the vibrant National Historic Landmark District of Ybor City near Downtown Tampa, Florida. casaybor.com
La Union
Community, connection, and culture come together at La Unión Apartments, where Tampa’s rich history and vibrant future unite. Inspired by the historic social hall once on this site, our Ybor City apartments honor that legacy by fostering bonds among residents, the neighborhood, and the area’s deep-rooted heritage. bit.ly/LaUnionYbor
Places To Visit:
Ybor City Sirens LLC
Everything from cosplay, pole dancers, acrobats, roller babes and much much more! bit.ly/YborCitySirens
Hive Ybor 1802 E 3rd Ave, Tampa
Rooted in community, Hive is a cozy coworking space designed for creative professional and coffee-shop hoppers in the Tampa + Ybor area. yborhive.com
Ybor City Saturday Market
1901 N. 19th Street Tampa
The largest continually operating outdoor market in the Tampa Bay Area ybormarket.com
INTERVIEW
Counting Crows w/The Gaslight Anthem Sunday, July 20. 5 p.m. $53 & up The BayCare Sound. 255 Drew St., Clearwater rutheckerdhall.com
REVIEWS PROFILES MUSIC WEEK
Round here
Adam Duritz dives deep on the Counting Crows’ signature hit.
By Eric Snider
“Round Here” is the first song on the first album by Counting Crows. “Round Here” was the first song the band performed on “Saturday Night Live” on January 15, 1994. That appearance sparked a rapid rise for their debut album, August and Everything After, from the lower rungs of the Billboard 200 album chart to a peak of No. 4 in early April of that year. The album stayed on the chart for 93 weeks.
In the course of two-and-a-half months, Counting Crows went from a striving baby band to a top-selling act, and frontman Adam Duritz became a bona fide rock star.
I was set up with a 20-minute phone interview to advance Counting Crows’ show at The Baycare Sound. Because Duritz, 60, is thoughtful and verbose, I asked him if he minded ditching the standard tour-press interview and instead take a deep dive into one song. He readily agreed, and let me choose.
“Round Here” begins as a smoldering ballad and slowly escalates into several spine-tingling crescendos. “It was probably the signature song of the band at that time,” Duritz says.
In May, The Crows released their first studio album in 11 years: Butter Miracle, The Complete Sweets!. It’s the band’s best collection of new material since 2002’s Hard Candy. During our interview, Duritz never once steered the conversation toward promoting the new release, a standard tour-press tactic. I found that refreshing.
Here’s Duritz’s commentary about “Round Here” and related stuff, edited for length and clarity.
On the song’s origins
Well, it’s actually a Himalayans song, which was my band before Counting Crows, and also while I was in Counting Crows. We used to record all of our [Himalayans] rehearsals. Our bass player, Dave Janusko, just started playing this pattern on the bass. Our guitar player started sort of screaming psychedelic stuff over the top. And I started singing. [Lyrics came] off the top of my head. I took the tape home and the whole song was almost there. I mean, the [rehearsal] song was like a half an hour long, so I’m sure I edited it down a lot.
On the song’s development and influence on the album
The Himalayan’s version is pretty loud, psychedelic; a big electric song. [Counting Crows guitarist] Dave Bryson and I were playing open mics every now and then as a duo, and we played some shows with a quartet version of Counting Crows. We played “Round Here.” People really flipped out. Dave had a recording studio, and we did an acoustic version of “Round Here.” It’s pretty close to the one on the first [Counting Crows] record.
T-Bone Burnett [who produced August and Everything After] and I had a lot of talks before we made the first album, and we agreed on a direction. At that time, we sounded kind of like
late-model Roxy Music. Dave’s guitar playing was very influenced by John Squire from the Stone Roses. Our bass player had been listening to a lot of progressive music and his playing was all on Steinberger fretless basses. Our drummer used a big kit full of a lot of stuff, very busy as a drummer.
We hadn’t figured out who we were at all. We each came to the band with a lot of stuff we were influenced by, and Counting Crows was just this bag of things that sounded like other people. And what I really wanted to do was learn to play together. We needed to learn to listen to each other before we knew what to play. So we sort of stripped everybody’s influences out.
We made Matt {Malley] get rid of the Steinberger basses and get like an old Vox and a Hoffner. Dave [Bryson] was not allowed to use any effects on the record. We could add them in later in post, if we wanted. We cut Steve [Bowman’s} drum kit down. With Charlie [Gillingham], it was just piano and organ. We
kind of just stripped it down to the basics, not to be retro in any way, but really because I wanted us to stop leaning on effects and lean into listening and playing together—and learning to be a band together.
On recording the song and the album
The big thing was to not play perfect, but to play with feeling. One of my big worries about going into that record was that we’d all be intimidated—we’d go in the studio and we’d be looking around the walls at other people’s gold records, and we’d be focusing on playing perfect. And then we’d end up making this really sterile record that was all played very correctly.
So we talked to Robbie Robertson [of The Band] one day, and I told him about my worry. He said, “Why don’t you rent a house, make the record in a house. That way, no one’s ever made a record there before, and you don’t think about that stuff.” That’s what we did. [The Band’s continued on page 45
“We hadn’t figured out who we were at all.”
NOBODY MAKES US WAIT: Adam Duritz ditched the usual pre-tour interview for this explainer.
iconic debut album, Music From Big Pink, was recorded in a house.]
A big thing was, “Don’t worry about playing it right. But you gotta make me feel it. So when I sing over it, it really means something.”
On one of my favorite couplets—and how it came about. “Round here, we talk just like lions / But we sacrifice like lambs.”
That’s a weird one because in concert I don’t even sing that line anymore. Now it’s “Round here, we’re as cool as kittens / Out there, the dogs they cry. Round here, I’m running out of lives.”
On the Crows’ SNL appearance. The show’s producers wanted the band to open with the debut single, “Mr. Jones,” but Duritz insisted on “Round Here.”
We talked about it for a long time before we agreed to do the show. Plus they wanted both songs edited. So I refused to do the show. They finally agreed to let us [do it our way]. The reason, for me, was it was our first impression on the world. I think “Mr. Jones” is a great song, but it sounds like a lot of songs. Whereas “Round Here,” it’s completely unique and way more dramatic. And I thought: If we’re gonna make a first impression on the world, we should go out there with something epic.
SNL continued …
It’s usually in the set. But ya know, there are days when I don’t feel like playing it. There are days where you’re just exhausted. It’s tough, especially in the summertime when we’re touring America. The song’s about to start, and it seems like a heavy deal—like five minutes of really emoting, or 10 minutes if I’m improvising.
I’m waiting for the song to start, the organ’s in there and there’s vamping on the pedal steel. I’m waiting for Dave to play the [opening guitar lick] and I’m thinking … [sighs]. But you go up to sing it. And as soon as it starts, I’m lost in it. It’s a great story and it just sucks me in.
On his interpretation of “Round Here,” three decades after its release
INTERVIEW
It’s about a guy on the cusp of, like, his life, you know. A kid changing into an adult, looking out at the world and imagining how he’s gonna find his place in it. The world seems very vast, and he’s about to go travel all of it. But he doesn’t really know how to do it.
And so he grabs onto things from his childhood, these sort of silly idioms, as statements of purpose for being an adult. Like—around here nobody tells us to go to bed early. We always stay up late. Like—around here we stand up straight. Y’know, things that people told him to do that he thought were important. Now nobody’s telling me to go to bed.
[The appearance] changed our career because, you gotta remember, back then “Saturday Night Live” was great about booking bands that they loved, even if those bands weren’t big. We were an opening band on tours. I mean, [SNL] made our career. But I was right for it to be “Round Here.” The other reason it made our career is because we played the right song [first].
On performing “Round Here” in concert these days
He’s looking for things to stand on, things to define himself by, and he doesn’t really know how to do that. But he’s trying. It’s a lot like [the James Joyce novel] “Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man.” It’s a statement of where I am in my life right now.
For me, as an artist, looking at a life making art, that never changes. You’re still always looking out at the world, trying to figure out how to create something that means something. Looking for a way to make a statement that says something about you. I was looking for that when I wrote that song. I’m looking for it now.
- CROSSFIRE CREEK BAND 7/18 - ABSOLUTE BON JOVI & DEF LEPPARD EXPERIENCE LIFE OF THE PARTY BAND (PARTY DECK) 7/19 - TWINKLE AND ROCK SOUL RADIO 7/20 - FLO-RAW 7/21 - SONGWRITERS NIGHT hosted by PIPER
7/22 - CHRISTIAN GABRIEL
7/23 - OPEN JAM with BAREFOOT BOB & THE HOPE BAND 7/24 - BLACKWATER JACK 7/25 - ASHLEY LUX BAND 7/26 - K-LUV & THE UNITED FUNK FOUNDATION
TALK LIKE LIONS: There are ‘Round Here’ lines that Adam Duritz doesn’t even sing anymore.
continued from page 43
By Josh Bradley & Ray Roa C CL Recommends
FRI 18
3rd Annual Clearwater Smooth Jazz Jam: Dave Koz w/Brian McKnight/Peabo Bryson/Jonathan Butler/Peter White/ Keiko Matsui/more If he ever crosses your mind, anytime, then rejoice. Brian McKnight is back in the Bay area, 28 years after his breakout single soundtracked the inception of 27 year olds across the globe. The 56-year-old crooner is third behind Snoop Dogg and classical conductor Zubin Mehta when it comes to Grammy nominations without a win, but that won’t matter at this gig, which is part of Ruth Eckerd Hall’s annual two-day celebration of smooth jazz (McKnight plays Saturday, but Dave Koz headlines opening night). (Ruth Eckerd Hall, Clearwater)
Getter Tanner Petulla’s 2018 Visceral tour may as well have been his “Dylan Goes Electric” moment, because day-one fans of his EDM persona Getter started booing and hissing at the lessened presence of his typical dubstep sound and the involvement of a newer, more hip-hop-oriented sound. He ended up canceling the remaining dates of that tour, stepping away from his old material, and even taking on an all-new, Terror Reid moniker in the rap world. One indefinite hiatus and over half-a-decade later, the 32-year-old has since come forward and said that while he’s been through it, he simply preferred doing rap over EDM and at the end of the day, fan reception had nothing to do with why the Getter project took a break. Petulla probably isn’t lying either, because this limited revival tour’s stop in the historic Ybor room is set to go down as another one of its head-splitter, late Friday night gigs. (The Ritz, Ybor City)
Laura Bell Bundy Broadway revival rehearsals will typically have cast and crew members from the original run involved to some extent, and Laura Bell Bundy—who originated the role of Elle Woods in “Legally Blonde” on Broadway—is rolling into town to take a gander at Bill Edwards Foundation for the Arts’ “Jr.” production of the Tony-nominated show. The Ohio-bred singer (who also originated roles in Broadway versions of “Hairspray” and “Dreamgirls”) will appear alongside the theater camp students for a preview of their production, as well as a showtune-filled, headlining set of her own. (Mahaffey Theater, St. Petersburg)
C Maye The Obama stamp of approval is a powerful thing, just ask Maria Alejandra Osorio. The 31-year-old Miami songwriter better known as Maye (stylized all-lowercase) appeared on the former president’s 2020 summer playlist alongside Leon Bridges, The Chicks, D’Angelo, Nina Simone and 48 others and has never looked back. After spending the last half-decade release singles, Osorio—whose father penned a Latin Grammy-winning tune for Celia Cruz in
2014—finally arrives supporting Música Para Abrir El Cielo her debut full-length of bilingual indie-pop. (Crowbar, Ybor City)
C Stone Nomads w/Dissectomy/ Consume The Wolf/The Burial Ground To kick off its latest tour, Houston-based sludge metal outfit Stone Nomands celebrated by announcing that it just signed to Ripple Music, a California indie record label curated for the heaviest of rock and psychedelia. With that news also came the announcement that a third, “crushingly heavy new album” is due this fall, produced by mixing console veteran Randy Burns, who has Megadeth and Suicidal Tendencies on his resume. No telling if we’ll hear a preview, but this is the second to last show on the Nomads’ current tour schedule, so maybe don’t take those fields of doom for granted either way. (Deviant Libation, Tampa)
C Weiland Outside of some early 2020s newspaper clippings out of Ohio, there’s not a lot out there about Gavin Huff. The modern internet has plenty to offer though. YouTube, along with blogs like Highsnobiety, and Complex paint a picture of a Tampa-born songwriter that’s lent a lot of knowhow to other Soundcloud-loving artists who’re also making waves online. Huff, who performs under his alleged middle name Weiland, floats miles above most of his online infamous peers, and not just for the viral videos and urban legends that surround his origin story. His influences—which range from Kanye to Daft Punk, Imogen Heat and Mike Dean— pepper themselves into Huff’s next-gen alt-pop driven by the sounds of vintage drum machines (Vices , 2022) and club-ready synth (You Can’t Climb the Mountain , 2025). (Music Hall at New World Tampa, Tampa)
SAT 19
C Cannibal Kids w/Pretoria/Mossheads
Cannibal Kids has a long history in the Bay area, with shows going all the way back to 2021. Never before has the indie-pop band played The Bricks, which is re-emerging as a reliable place to go see an intimate show while standing shoulder-to-shoulder with fans. The Miami export is joined by Michigan indie-rock band Pretoria, and Mossheads, a band born in the parking garages of Tampa’s University of South Florida. (The Bricks, Ybor City)
C Clearwater Jazz Ultimate Summer Jazz Jam: Fred Johnson w/Belinda Womack/James Suggs/John Lamb/Simon Lasky/Trace Zacur/Judi Glover/David Manson/Joe Porter/Pete Carney/more Even if you’re still bummed about last year’s Clearwater Jazz Holiday getting axed due to hurricane Milton, you can’t say that there’s ever a shortage of local jazz talent. A fistful of it comes together for this who’s-who in Largo, which includes local, 91-year-old legend John Lamb of the Duke Ellington Orchestra, Disney Parks pianist Judi Glover, and vocalist Fred Johnson. The gig’s first come, first served though, and Lord knows you don’t want
to sit in narrow Largo traffic. (Central Park Performing Arts Center, Largo)
Toto w/Men At Work/Christopher Cross Men At Work’s Colin Hay sat out last month’s Ringo Starr concert in downtown Clearwater due to a chest infection, and while it was a bummer to see a stripped-down All-Starr Band, nary a year passes where the 72-yearold doesn’t pop into town. The day before this Gen-X party featuring Toto and yacht rock legend Christopher Cross, Hay is releasing Man @ Work Volume 2, a follow-up to his 2003 album of acoustic rerecordings. The acoustic formula from before will still be in use, but there are more deep cuts included on this record, so don’t be thrown off if the current lineup of Men At Work (which is just Hay’s solo band with a different name, per what he told Creative Loafing Tampa Bay last year) dusts off something uber unfamiliar. If anything, maybe Hay will join Toto (featuring fellow All-Starr Steve Lukather on guitar) to sing the chorus of “Africa” to make up for missing that Ringo gig, because at least we know they don’t get sick of each other. (MidFlorida Credit Union Amphitheatre, Tampa)
SUN 20
C Darius Rucker Last weekend in Atlantic City, the Hootie and the Blowfish frontmanslash-country singer lost his voice onstage after three songs, and ended up issuing full refunds to fans that came out. The 59-yearold must be on the mend, because his Florida shows—including his seemingly annual stop in Tampa—are still on. These shows lean more
towards his solo career, including his new, Mom-honoring album Carolyn’s Boy, so don’t get pissy if you don’t hear your favorite Hootie album track. (Hard Rock Event Center at Seminole Hard Rock Hotel and Casino, Tampa)
TUE 22
Barrington Levy Most of the kids born the year that the dancehall veteran announced that he was working on his final album It’s About Time are entering high school later this month. We wouldn’t dare complain about having so much extra time with an artist that has spoken about the possibility of retirement, but there hasn’t been any word about the record— which promises to feature guest spots from the likes of Damian Marley and Snoop Dogg— in a few years. For now though, the vibes will be right when the 61-year-old and his four-piece arrive with half-a-century of lush material. (Jannus Live, St. Petersburg)
WED 23
Gavn! w/Adam Yokum Before opening for The Fray in Orlando this week, Seattle-grown troubadour Gavn! will showcase his smooth, semi-recent EP Forevergreen, which features tough reminders about how unfair life can be, along with some questions that trigger immense self-doubt and self-downplaying. (Music Hall at New World Brewery, Tampa)
See an extended version of this listing via cltampa.com/music.
In November, William Dorey will be in Mexico as part of the Hypnosis two-day indie-rock megafestival alongside Pavement, Dinosaur Jr., Molchat Doma, Spiritualized and at least a dozen more heavy hitters likes Japanese Breakfast, Deafheaven, Crumb and The Budos Band. A week later, the London-based alt-pop maestro finds himself in Florida for a three-date run through the Sunshine State that includes a stop in the Bay area.
Dorey—better known by the Skinshape moniker—is supporting Mostrando os Dentes , his second project with Brazilian singersongwriter Pedro Mizutani. Skinshape has also been a shapeshifting project as of late, as evidenced by a funky 2024 album,
The Fray Friday, Oct. 10. 7 p.m. $101.36 & up (resale only). Jannus Live, St. Petersburg
Kompany w/AlienPark/MYR/Bambi Friday, Oct. 10. 10 p.m. $15.57 & up. The Ritz, Ybor City
Armani White (opening for T-Pain w/ Earthgang) Tuesday, Oct. 14. 7 p.m. $47.50 & up. The BayCare Sound, Clearwater
Another Side Of Skinshape , which lets listeners into less-explored corners of Dorey’s mind where Ethiopian rhythms, soulful vocals, and experiments with different drum machines and keyboards fill the air.
It’ll be interesting to see how much analog equipment Dorey, and ex-member of the U.K. alt-rock band Palace, is able to bring with him to the Bay area. Tickets to see Skinshape play Bayboro Brewing Co. in St. Petersburg on Saturday, Nov. 8 are available now for $25-$30.
See Josh Bradley’s regular roundup of new concerts coming to Tampa Bay below. Ray Roa
Arts Fishing Club Tuesday, Oct. 14. 7:30 p.m. $25.89. Crowbar, Ybor City
Lumasi w/Lowcation/Studder Friday, Oct. 17. 10 p.m. $15.57 & up. The Ritz, Ybor City
Thrice w/Modern Color Friday, Oct. 24. 6:30 p.m. $41.50. Jannus Live, St. Petersburg
AFI w/TR-ST Saturday, Oct. 25. 6 p.m. $103.50 & up (resale only). The Ritz, Ybor City
Reneé Rapp w/Ravyn Lenae Monday, Oct. 27. 8 p.m. $66.05 & up. Yuengling Center, Tampa
Strangelove (Depeche Mode tribute) w/Lovesong (The Cure tribute) Sunday, Nov. 2. 7:30 p.m. $44 & up. Palladium Theater, St. Petersburg
Artikal Sound System Friday, Nov. 7. 7 p.m. $20. Jannus Live, St. Petersburg
Dear Oracle, summer is a slow time for my (restaurant) industry in general, but this year has been particularly hard on my business. I’m very worried about surviving until the end of the year. I’ve trimmed back where I can, but I worry I won’t be able to keep supporting my small (and loved) staff. Do the cards have any advice?—Summer Slump
Cards: Four of Wands, Six of Wands, King of Cups, Two of Cups (reversed)
Dear Summer, I know this business means the world to you. It’s a passion project and something you love doing. The cards drawn here are the kind I’d expect to see in an answer to a relationship question or a question about an artistic journey—something deeply emotional and fiery and life-giving.
This is not just about a job. This is a calling for you.
The good news is, I think your business is also loved by people other than you. The Four of Wands is a card of community, family, and stability. Your restaurant, I’d venture, is a place that means a lot to the community at large.
The fact that you’ve made it through several summers before speaks highly of your business— especially since many restaurants shutter in less than a year. The Six of Wands is about celebrating a victory—you made it!—but one victory doesn’t necessarily mean a goal has been met. What are you envisioning for your business? What would it look like to not just survive but grow?
As the King of Cups, you’re both the heart and brains behind your business. This place is your baby and you’re giving all you can, which makes sense. It is your calling after all, your vision. But carrying all of that weight can be a lot for one person. Which leads us to the one card that can be interpreted as business advice…
What would it look like for you to have a business partner?
The Two of Cups is a card of partnership, particularly ones that share the same emotional core. If you were to have a partner, it would have to be someone who shared your vision of the place, who understood what made it special, and who would share the goals you have for the business. Maybe this would just be an investor. Maybe this would be someone who would focus on running one side of the business while you focused on the other. Perhaps it’s partnering with community members for events. I’m not sure.
I know that bringing in another person to your passion project can feel fraught. You’ve been at the helm and, whatever happens, it’s not because someone else fucked it up. But perhaps the way to grow is for there to be more hands on deck. It might involve letting go of some power, but perhaps another set of eyes will help you get to calmer seas. (Or, at least, another cash flow to tap into.)
I do hope you’re able to make this work, my dear.
Dear Oracle, I’ve always loved my longtime friend…but I think I might actually be falling in love with her. We live on opposite sides of the country and she’s in an “open-ish” relationship, which doesn’t make it easier and isn’t ideal. And obviously, I don’t want to ruin our friendship. Do the cards have any advice on what to do?—Friends-to-lovers?
Cards: Nine of Pentacles (reversed), Knight of Cups (reversed), King of Pentacles, King of Cups
Dear FTL, congratulations and condolences on falling in love with your longtime friend. While friendship is certainly the basis of long-lasting love, it can be tricky to make that transition— as so many movies, TV shows, emo albums, and novels tell us.
I think you hold your friend in the greatest of esteem. The Nine of Pentacles is a card of genius and extraordinary wonder. It’s a lush garden full of beautiful cultivated fruit and a woman, powerful and at ease. It’s also a card of intimidation—who wants to pick such exquisite fruit?—and I think you’re probably a little moonstruck by your friend.
The pentacles are often symbols of work and finances, but they also symbolize what money can bring—stability and safety. The King of Pentacles is certainly a provider of stability and grounding presence, something wonderful to have in a partner.
The King of Cups is also a deep romantic, but someone who is more mature in their love. To this King, love is not just an emotion but also an action, something you do daily. It might not be as flashy and passionate as, say, the actions of Knight, but it’s enduring. Again, this speaks to the stability and safety that you can offer in a relationship.
ORACLE OF YBOR
Send your questions to oracle@cltampa. com or DM @theyboracle on Instagram
Of course, the only way to figure out if your friend would like to become more than friends is to talk to her about it. (Or get a trusted third party to ask if she likes you.) That might not be a door you’re ready to open. Judging by the cards alone, I think you both might be well suited—but relationships are more complicated than a fourcard spread allows.
The Knight of Cups also suggests that she is a charmer, someone who inspires little and big “R” romantic feelings in many. Which is to say, it makes sense that you’re falling in love with her. How could you not?
Together, this paints a picture of someone who’s captivating. And someone who you’re definitely intimidated by.
But the cards do offer a bit of a pep talk. You certainly bring wonderful traits to the table, too.
Perhaps at this stage, you might just need to start internalizing that you are actually a worthy partner who can bring a loving stability to the table. And maybe, in time, your friend will see that too. And even if she doesn’t return the feelings, I think you’re emotionally sound enough to handle that rejection without the friendship souring.
Whatever you decide, I hope you feel safe and loved.
Best of luck, my dear.
See more of Caroline and learn about her services via carolinedebruhl.com
Quickies
By Dan Savage
What advice do you have for young people who want to have an open conversation with their partners about changing aspects of their sex life to make it more pleasurable without hurt feelings or awkwardness?
What’s more likely to lead to hurt feelings in the long run: A few awkward conversations now that hopefully will lead to better conversations (and sex) in the future? Or… avoiding the awkwardness now and eventually reaching a point where the sex isn’t that great so you have it less-and-less until one of you cheats or leaves. Your choice.
Dealing with cultural differences: My boyfriend is Italian and weirdly superstitious; at times, it’s anti-science. Not sure what to do here. Keep your mouth shut, your legs open, and get that EU passport.
We’re two late-blooming bi people in a monogamous relationship. We have small children. Tips for exploring being bi?
Next time grandma babysits…say you’re going to the movies but go to a sex club, or a swingers party, or a mixed queer space, etc. Check it out. Meet some people. Maybe fuck. (Pro tip: whoever isn’t driving should read the synopsis of the film you “saw” out loud in the car on your way home. You wanna be prepared to answer grandma’s questions.)
Will semen damage your tooth enamel if you swallow and then sleep without brushing again? Have you seen my teeth?
My boyfriend and I have just started messing around with chastity. I have been interested in it for a while and got a cock cage, and he put it on for him yesterday. It really turns me on letting him have this much control and I wanna keep going. Any advice as we start this out? Getting kinky with him is so much fun, and I want to get as much out of it as we can!
“They should check out Reddit’s r/chastitytraining for online help, community, and resources,” said Dark-Blue and DB-Vice in a joint statement. Dark-Blue is a dominant hot wife and DB-Vice is her locked (and cucked) husband. “For detailed sizing guides and high-quality cages, look at KINK3D. Our own advice: put your health first—watch out for swelling, discoloration, or excessive pain at night. Always remember: chastity play is more mental than physical, and that cage is a means to an end. The end being a constant reminder in your pants of your keyholder’s control and your submission.” Follow Dark-Blue and DB-Vice on Twitter @DarkBlueGoddess.
My husband, a trans man, died unexpectedly. How do I respectfully dispose of his dicks?
First, I’m so sorry for your loss. If I were in your shoes, it would break my heart to re-home or otherwise dispose of my husband’s dicks. I would put them in a box, tuck them away on a high shelf someplace, and let my heirs worry about what to do with them when my time comes. Again, so sorry for your loss.
I can’t make plans the way I did when I was single because of my partner’s anxiety. What do I do?
Partnered people can’t make plans the way single people can—you have to take your partner into consideration, you have to check in with your partner, you can’t decide at the last minute to fly to Europe or disappear into a sex dungeon. But while you need to be considerate of your partner and their anxiety, you can’t let their anxiety control you—and you should be wary of a partner who leverages their anxiety to isolate you. Basically, if you’re never allowed to do anything on your own, or see anyone on your own, or make plans on your own because it makes your partner anxious… that’s not a partnership, it’s a hostage situation.
I hate it when my sub bites me as I’m fucking him but he’s SO into it. I want him to be happy! Do I tell him?
So, immediately suggest a shower break, give him a minute to breathe (or something to eat if he’s been starving himself all day), then finish on him, not in him.
Monogamously nosy: What’s your take on those “no fooling around with friends” clauses? Open couples get to make up their own rules— just like closed ones do—and lots of open couples rule out friends. But unless a couple also has a “one-and-done” rule, i.e. a rule against repeats, it’s unfair to a regular third to rule out treating a regular third with kindness and decency. Not offering benefits to friends is understandable— denying friendship to someone who’s regularly offering you benefits is petty.
Open m/m couple. I lose interest in my partner—temporarily—after he’s had a hookup because I don’t want to compete. Am I the asshole?
could suck my cock before or after. I didn’t think I would get hard—I’ve never been attracted to men—but I was rock hard the whole time. Almost came. Does this make me gay or bi or pan or something?
No. P.S. Google “situational homosexuality.”
I can’t take thick dick— been bottoming for years and just can’t. How do I say this nicely on the apps?
Since guys rarely face rejection for having thick cocks (or six packs or great hair), stumbling over some stranger on the apps whose profile bluntly expresses a preference for smaller dicks (or rounder bellies or balding heads) is unlikely to cause offense. Non-existent wounds can’t be reopened.
My partner is badly injured; recovery may take a while. How can we stay close?
SAVAGE LOVE
If he’s your sub… you should be able to order him to knock it off. If you still wanna let him bite you once in a while because it makes him happy, folding his love for biting into your existing D/s dynamic shouldn’t be that hard. Identify something he hates but is willing to endure to please you—kind of like you’ve been willing to endure his biting—and punish him with that thing (flogging? tit clamps? piss?) as his punishment whenever he bites you. But make sure it’s not something he loves to endure, as that would incentivize the biting.
Mid-40s bi/pan woman here who is afraid to fuck women because I do not know what to do. Advice?
Put that in your personal ad—no experience with other women—and you won’t hear from women who aren’t interested in fucking women who don’t already know their way around a vulva. The women you do hear from will either be open to showing you around or actively turned on by the thought of being your first/breaking you in.
How do I convince my fuck bud that I’m serious that I’m not afraid of/turned off by anal accidents! It’s nice that you don’t want your fuck buddy to think you’re turned off when shit happens— literally—but you don’t want your fuck buddy to think you’re turned on when shit happens either.
Depends. If you’re withholding sex to punish your partner for having sex with someone else—something you’re both allowed to do—and the point of punishing him is to make him hesitate to have sex with other people, then you’re the asshole. If you’re just insecure about directand-immediate comparisons and/or the whole “reclaiming” thing isn’t a turn-on for you and you’ve let your partner know (more than once) that this is a “you” problem and not a “him” problem, then you’re not the asshole.
Hubs loves having his balls kicked/smashed. Safe healthy ball play limits?
You’re going to want to take tiny, baby-steps— or tiny, baby-kicks—to figure out where your husband’s limits are. If he’s like most guys who enjoy having their balls busted, you’ll wind up kicking him harder than you think you should but not as hard as you can. But please note: ball busting is risky.
Two months ago, I started noticing something that looked like clumps of slightly yellowish jelly in my cum. What’s wrong?
Probably nothing. Jelly-like clumps can appear in your semen if it’s been a while since your last orgasm—but those clumps can be a symptom of a prostate problem or an STI. If you’re not experiencing other symptoms, it’ll probably go away on its own. If clumps persist, get an STI screening and have your prostate checked.
Why do I want to be submissive in bed but dominant in real life?
Our sexual fantasies often involve transgression—not just against social conventions and/or expectations, but against the person we pretend to be and/or want to be and/or actually are.
Met a hot girl with a bi boyfriend, also hot. She said I could fuck her so long as her boyfriend
I’m so sorry you’re going through this—best wishes to your partner for a speedy recovery. I’m sure it’s not the same as what your partner is going through, but I recently had rotator cuff surgery and the recovery from that is long and painful. My husband’s willingness to sit with me, read, or watch TV helped us stay close. My heart goes out to you.
New to the big city. Single, solo. Pride parties seem cliquey. Tips for loosening up/meeting people?
What looks like cliques from the outside are usually just established friendship groups on the inside. So, instead of looking at guys chatting with their friends and feeling excluded, look for the guys who—like you—are out at the bars or clubs alone. If you approach enough of them just to make conversation, you’ll have a friendship group of your own soon.
Fifteen years ago, I sucked a guy’s dick and failed to mention that I was HIV+ until after I blew him. The guy ended up pulling a gun on me. He said if I ever told anyone he’d report me to the police. Should I be worried?
There are still mandatory HIV-disclosure laws on the books that were passed at the height of AIDS hysteria in the 1980s. These laws are counterproductive, as they can discourage people from knowing their HIV status (you don’t have to disclose what you don’t know), but most HIVdisclosure laws have statutes of limitations, usually under three years. So, even if this guy is out there and somehow managed to find out you confided in someone about this experience, the police aren’t going to come looking for you— and the crime he committed (threatening you with a deadly weapon) is worse and has a longer statute of limitations!
Email your question for the column to mailbox@savage.love! Or record your question for the Savage Lovecast at savage.love/askdan! Podcasts, columns and more at Savage.Love
Organization with many boomers
Popular composer of dog operas?
Art bakers
Mad Men network
Tension-filled
Major time
1981 sub flick
“___ little confused”
Sirius, e.g.
With 71 Across, a dog opera and its composer?
67 German cry 69 Carte start
Pool hall? 71 See 64 Across 74
e.g.
abbr. 77 Count from Jersey 78 Asian lake
79 Country singerturnedsitcom star
81 Shakespeare et al.
82 Celluloid droid
Shock jock
“Come on, stop this bickering ...” 89 Eliot Ness, e.g.
