Essential Grace Magazine December Edition

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Best wishes in the festive season and the very best in the year to come!

From the Essential Grace family.

Christmas Edition

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in this issue…

Monthly Theme Features World Aids Day 16 Days of Activism Against Genderbased Violence

Mental Health Features Adapting in the Festive Season The 5-minute Calm Make it matter; Prioritizing your Partner

Health and Wellness Features Christmas on the African Continent Survival tips for your wallet Thanksgiving from China

Resources

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ecember, the most wonderful time of the year. That is the general idea right?  In many regards, it still is a beautiful time filled with weddings, music festivals, and feasting. But lately it has become a prelude to a January of COVID 19 spreading wildly across the country. Please let us not forget about this pandemic, stay safe and stay home as much as you can. This month also saw the commemoration of World Aids Day (1st of December) and the end to the 16 Days of Activism Against Gender Based Violence (10th December) which media reports as the best campaign of its kind in Malawi so far. We do have a long way to go when it comes to Gender-Based Violence (GBV) and Intimate Partner Violence (IPV), however it is amazing to see the growth and involvement from different communities and organisations across the country on these issues. Remember, it is not only women and girls who are at risk of GBV and IPV. Although women are more likely to report abuse, both genders are at risk. We decided to keep the final issue of the year light and bright as an end to an otherwise difficult year. We appreciate everyone for their contributions and articles, God bless you! For those who would like to be part of the magazine in the coming year, we welcome your stories, pictures, comments, suggestions, and support. Please get in touch through our contact details on the next page. From all of us at Essential Grace Magazine, we wish you a Merry Christmas and a Very Blessed New Year!! Julie Soko Managing Editor

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Julie Soko Managing Editor

Mtendere Kishindo Sub - Editor

Thandi De Jong Editorial Assistant

Naomi Msusa Editorial Art and Design

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Submit to essentialgrace@zoho.com

Essential Grace Magazine

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December 2021


Monthly feature

World AIDS Day is commemorated on the first of December each year. Founded in 1988, it is a day used to raise awareness and encourage the ongoing worldwide fight against AIDS (Acquired Immuno-Deficiency Syndrome) which develops though HIV (Human Immuno-Deficiency Virus)

2021 World Aids Day Theme ‘End Inequalities. End AIDS’

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Some quick facts … There is currently no cure for HIV spreads through infected blood or fluids such as anal fluid, breast milk, semen, vaginal fluid.

HIV/’AIDS although there are many ways through which it can be managed through medication and a healthy lifestyle.

Get tested regularly to know your status and make

HIV decreases the body’s

the right choices for

ability to fight against

yourself as well as your

infections and disease

loved ones.

.

The red ribbon is a symbol of solidarity with people living with HIV. It is used to help raise awareness on the virus and to show support for all those who have been impacted.

There are four main ways through which the virus is spread; through contaminated blood/needle (syringe), infected mother to child during pregnancy or through breastmilk, through unprotected sex, and through infected blood or organs from a donor to a recipient.

.

The theme for 2021 is about ending inequalities and ending AIDS. Against the current prevalence of the COVID 19 pandemic, how does the possibility of this theme sound to you? Give us your feedback through essentialgrace@zoho.com

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The only way to know if you have

it can lead to AIDS (Acquired

been infected with HIV is through a

Immunodeficiency Syndrome).

blood test. Yet many people in the

What are the symptoms of HIV

world are still ignorant when it comes

infection?

to HIV/Aids. There are many who do

Some people may experience flu-

not know their status or are too afraid

like symptoms within 2 -4 weeks after

to get tested. Here is a short refresher

being exposed to the virus, while

to remind us of what we should know

others may have no symptoms to

so far.

report. The symptoms may last for a few days or several weeks.

What is HIV?

Symptoms include fever, rash, night

HIV (Human Immunodeficiency

sweats, muscle pain, sore throat,

Virus) is a virus that attacks the

fatigue, ulcers in the mouth, swollen

body’s immune system. If not treated

lymph nodes. Note that these


symptoms are not exclusive to HIV infection only, and can be caused by other conditions. What are the stages of HIV

infection?

never move into Stage 3. Stage 3: Acquired Immunodeficiency Syndrome (AIDS) This is the most severe phase of HIV infection. The immunity of the

Stage 1: acute infection

infected person has become so

There is a large amount of HIV

compromised that they are prone to

in the blood and are highly

an increasing number of severe

contagious. Some may experience

illness (opportunistic infections). The

flu-like symptoms as the body’s

diagnosis of AIDS is given once their

natural response to fighting infection.

CD4 count drops below 200

The method of testing and

cells/mm, or if they develop certain

diagnosing HIV at the acute stage is

opportunistic infections. The viral

through antigen/antibody tests or

load at this stage is very high and

nucleic acid tests.

they remain highly contagious.

Stage 2: Chronic HIV infection

Without treatment, people with AIDS

This is the asymptomatic

may live for up to 3 years.

infection stage also known as the

How do you live with HIV?

clinical latency stage. The virus is still

Getting diagnosed. Once you have

active in the body but reproduces at

had you blood tested and have

very low levels. Illness or symptoms

been found positive with HIV, you

rarely show up at this stage. A person

need to take the time to process the

is still contagious at this stage, and

results. You may have a mixture of

but can live up to 10 years in this

emotions and may even panic. VCT

state without taking antiretroviral

centers make sure to provide

therapy. This stage comes to an end

counselling before and after testing

once the HIV in the blood (viral load)

to ensure you have an idea that you

increases and the CD4 cell count

understand what it means to get a

decreases. At which point they

positive result. Your focus should be

move into stage three of the

centered on how you are going to

infection. Note that people who

live the rest of your life, the changes

take HIV medication regularly may

your need to make, and the right

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positive attitude towards yourself as well as your loved ones. Find the right care. Identify a medical practitioner that you are likely to work with regarding treatment and management of symptoms, as well as long term medication. If your medical practitioner does not have enough knowledge or specialize in HIV treatment and management, ask to

There is a lot that the world

be referred to one that does.

does not know about the impact of

Start HIV Treatment. There is no cure

COVID 19 on people living with HIV.

for HIV, however, taking HIV

What has been noted around the

treatment as soon as possible can

world is that people living with HIV

reduce and even suppress the viral

may be at risk of developing severe

load to the point of no detection.

illness from COVID 19 infection,

Antiretroviral Therapy (ART) can

although this theory is yet to be

keep the virus suppressed and

scientifically proven as fact.

undetectable in your blood if taken

Do COVID 19 vaccines interfere with

early/soon after being infected, and

HIV medicine (ART)?

regularly throughout life. Most

There is currently no evidence

people can manage to get the virus

to show a potential link between

under control within six months of Art

ARTs, pre-exposure prophylaxis (PrEP)

and other healthy lifestyle changes.

or post exposure prophylaxis (PEP).

Note that taking ARTs does not

Can HIV medicine (ART) be used to

prevent transmission of other sexually

treat COVID 19?

transmitted diseases.

HIV and COVID 19 FAQ

Treatment for COVID 19 is still very limited around the world. There is no evidence to show that HIV

Are people with HIV more likely to

medication is effective in treating

get COVID 19?

COVID 19. ART should not be

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stopped or switched in an attempt

mental health of people living with

to treat COVID 19 illness in people

HIV. People living with HIV often

with HIV. There have been trails –

internalize the stigma they

with some ongoing – on whether HIV

experience and begin to develop a

medicines can be used to treat

negative self-image. They may fear

COVID 19, you can find out more on

they will be discriminated against or

these trials through this link

judged negatively if their HIV status is

Stigma and Discrimination are still

revealed.

major challenges. Stigma is an attitude or belief that people hold, and it can show up in different ways such as people believing that only certain groups of people or races can get HIV; or making moral judgements about people who are proactive in HIV prevention (such as promoting use of condoms or practicing abstinence), or having the idea that people deserve to get HIV because of their life choices. Discrimination is slightly different to stigma in that it is the behaviour that results from stigma. So this can be through refusing to interact with someone who is known to be HIV positive, calling people HIV as a way of identification, treating people with HIV in excessively biased ways. HIV and Mental Health HIV stigma and discrimination affect the emotional well-being and 13 | E s s e n t i a l G r a c e M a g a z i n e

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The 16 days of Activism against Gender-Based Violence is an annual international campaign that is commemorated on every year from the 25th of November to the 10th of December. It was initiated by the Inaugural Women’s Global Leadership Institute in 1991. It is coordinated every year by the Center for Women’s Global Leadership as an organizing strategy by different individuals around the world. This year marks the 30th anniversary of the campaign. In Malawi, the 2021 campaign started with a launch ceremony in Chiwaza Ground in Nkhata Bay on the 25th of November. The Ministry of Gender and Community Development, and Social Welfare along with various NGO’s worked together in organizing and funding this year’s launch. The First Lady Madam Monica Chakwera called for cooperation and accountability, as well as more efforts in raising awareness to those who have not yet received the message of gender-based violence in Malawi.

Does the concept Gender-based Violence consider boys and men who are also impacted by this vice? In a previous publication, we explored problems relating to Intimate Partner Violence (IPV) which specifies violence that occurs between people in a romantic relationship. However, gender-based violence although a broader term; aims to raise awareness specifically to the violence that women and girls are receiving in different contexts around the world. This campaign is by no means a move to sideline males or undermine the violence that they experience in different contexts. To find out more about this campaign and what it stands for, visit the UN Women’s website here

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Mental Health

‘How wonderful it is that nobody need wait a single moment before starting to improve the world.’ Unknown

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Adapting in the Festive Season December is usually the time when families come together; schools have closed so most children are at home, most offices especially in the civil service are also on holiday. This can be a great time to connect with family and enjoy each other’s company. However, it can also be a miserable time for those who have dysfunctional relationships with family. In more recent times, there hasn’t been much choice in this because of lockdowns, travel restrictions, and social distancing. In most parts of Africa this may not have been heavily enforced, but in the west COVID 19 has had a devastating impact on family gatherings. Several other factors have contributed to this; for example, many people have lost loved ones through COVID 19 disease, many people are still fearful of getting infected and are less likely to visit others. As we get into the second festive season under the COVID 19 shadow, there are some lessons that we can learn from the past and ensure that the first few months of the new year are not filled with more deaths of loved ones.

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Firstly, do not assume we are out of danger. In Malawi, we have enjoyed several months where COVID 19 infection and death rates are very low, especially in 2020. We assumed that we were free from the pandemic and therefore gatherings and travel both within and out of the country were rampant. In January 2021, we saw how this led to many people becoming infected and others losing their lives as a result. If you must travel, please ensure you are limiting the chances of spreading the virus to your family, workmates, and or friends. Secondly, limit your travel plans. Yes, this is a very difficult thing to ask a Malawian in the festive season. The trips to the village, or from the village to town, or, most popularly the trips to the lake cannot just be abandoned like that, what do we expect people to do? Yet this is our new normal, we have to make adjustments if we are to avoid the traumatizing impact of COVID 19 that we saw earlier in 2021. Thirdly, get vaccinated. The country still has a large number of vaccines available. The choice to get vaccinated still remains up to the individual, however, we have December 2021


seen from the trends in other parts of the world that those without the vaccine are the most likely to end up in hospital with serious illness. So if you must choose, especially for those who have underlying conditions or compromised immunity, choose to rather be safe than sorry. Lastly, adapt! Malawians are known to be resourceful people; we can be very creative when the need arises. I believe this is the time to make adjustments in how we celebrate Christmas. If it means going to church, let us consider sitting outside or with the

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appropriate distance from others. If we are having parties and family get-togethers, let’s have them outdoors with plenty of fresh air and physical distance. When travelling away from home, remember to sanitize, mask up, and be mindful of the distances you keep with others. For regular updates on the COVID 19 pandemic worldwide, please access the WHO website at https://covid19.who.int For updates on the Malawi COVID 19 pandemic, please access the government website at https://covid19.health.gov.mw

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Sometimes all it takes is a five-minute calming exercise to bring some peace into your day. Try one of the following … Hand Awareness Exercise. Place your hands together and squeeze them for a few seconds. Once you release them, take note of how your hands feel when you release and try to keep your focus on the feeling for as long as you can. This activity helps you to connect your mind to your physical body while breaking negative thought patterns. Music. Listening to music can have a powerful impact on your emotions. When you listen to different types of music, pay attention to how they make you feel, or to what thoughts or memories come up for you. Quiet Reflection. Take some time to sit quietly, close your eyes, and acknowledge your surroundings. Making note of different sounds and smells, all with the aim of being present in the moment. This helps especially when you are feeling overwhelmed. One Minute Breathing. A convenient exercise that can be done anywhere, deep breathing is a great way to quickly get rid of physical tension and anxiety. You can do this while standing or seated. Breath in and out slowly, inhale for a count of 5 – hold for a count of 5 – and release your breath slowly for a count of 5. Repeat this exercise several times until you feel calm. Game of Fours. Begin to notice four things around you that you wouldn’t usually notice. For example, take note of the sounds of four different birds, or four different shades of green in the plants around you, or four smells you notice at different times of the day. Reduce the Volume. There are so many distractions in our lives from our mobile phones, to loud music playing through way too many blue tooth speakers. It can be difficult to find some peace and quiet in a world that is often lively with noise. Set aside some time in your day to be without noise, at least 10 to 30 minutes. Switch off your radio, television, phone, and any other distractions. Use this time to focus on how you feel, any challenges you may have faced in the day, and also acknowledging all the good things that you are grateful for.


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Christmas Survival Tips Christmas can be a crazy time in some households. With the influx of visiting family members, more mouths to feed, more cleaning up to do. There is usually a feeling of displacement in the air as people travel away from home and change their routines for the festival break. Eating patterns can change, regular sleep goes out the window, and there is often more stress especially on the younger people in the home. In this season more than others, it is important to be aware of your mental health. Not everyone is able to self-regulate. Some people have problems saying no to that drinking spree, or no to that excessive shopping trip, some may even struggle to maintain boundaries around visitors staying longer than necessary in their home. Anxiety and stress have become a huge part of the festive holidays. Here are some tips on surviving the festive season of 2021. Speak-up. Do not be afraid to speak up if you cannot cope with the demands of the season. Speak up if you have been invited to too many functions and events, parties, or if you are having to host more people in your home than you feel capable. Take a break. If things become too much, take regular breaks and pace yourself. It will be pointless for you to 21 | E s s e n t i a l G r a c e M a g a z i n e

wear yourself out and end up having a miserable Christmas. Have a lazy day. With all the busyness of the festive season, try to have at least one day where you can lounge around and do nothing at home. This is advisable especially with the COVID 19 virus still out there and spreading, staying home and taking the time to do the things you enjoy is actually more advisable. Appreciate the night sky. Takes some time to relax in the cool evening breeze (if you live south of the equator) after a hot day. The night sky is beautiful at this time of year with a full moon on Christmas day. For those who love to spend Christmas at the lake, this is a great time to see the lake of stars in all its glory. Be active. Most people are on holiday closer to Christmas, yet with COVID 19 restrictions some may have nowhere to go. This should not stop you from being active within your home. If you have a garden, then this is the best time to tend to it before the rainy season sets in. Other activities such as hiking, cycling, doing renovations around the house, carpentry, and even cooking can be taken up rather than sitting indoors and eating or sleeping most of the day.

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Avoid comparison. The festive season can be a lonely time for a lot of people. Social media and television often presents this time of year as a family centered time with lots of smiles, plenty of food, and many expensive gives or trips that everyone seems to enjoy. For the majority of people around the world this picture of a happy plentiful Christmas is not a reality. The current economic trends have left may people jobless, in deep financial challenges, and some in broken marriages. Many people do not enjoy the typical Christmas that mainstream media would like us to believe is best. So, do not compare your life to that of smiling faces on the TV or internet, have your own version of a good Christmas that is more valuable and realistic to your context.

celebrations, and of course getting the home back to order again afterwards. However, for you to function at your best you need to be well rested during the night. Try to sleep for a minimum of 6 hours a night, and the younger ones at least 8 hours a night. The pressure to give your children the perfect Christmas, get expensive and flashy gifts, be the perfect host, all while trying not to spend your entire bank account is real. This year, try to be realistic when it comes to telling the difference between your expectations versus your reality. If you need to speak to a professional, please get in touch through the details provided in the resource section.

Reach out. The festive season can trigger some unpleasant emotions in some people. It can remind people of the absence of family (through divorce, estrangement, living far apart, or death), it may also bring them into close contact with family or friends that they would rather avoid. If you find yourself struggling during this time, reach out to someone and share. Get enough sleep. Having many people in the house over the festive season can make it difficult to get a decent night’s sleep, what with catching up, drinks and 22 | E s s e n t i a l G r a c e M a g a z i n e

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Make it Matter; Making your Partner a Priority It is always important to make your partner a priority, especially in the festive season. December in Malawi can be any number of things, from families visiting the village, going to the lake, or having relatives over to visit from different parts of the country. The question is, how do you maintain the peace and stability in your relationship during this season? Have a look at the following points designed to help make it a more memorable festive season for you and your partner/spouse. Intentionality. Be intentional about everything, from the type of holiday plans made, the gifts you get them, to the activities you choose each day. Make it a point to know what your partner likes and would appreciate. Do not assume, rather ask. Agree on Money. Create a budget plan together that will carry you through the month of December and that will sustain you into the new year. Doing this will ensure you are spending well within your means as you entertain, travel, and celebrate Christmas. Know thy Spouse. Make sure you know what the other’s values, needs and expectations are in the festive season. Not everyone has the same understanding of Christmas. Faith-based values are not always shared even in the most committed relationships. Be sure that although you may compromise on certain activities such as outings and parties, your partner may be more reserved and may actually value some quiet time alone at home. Schedule some Alone Time. It’s easy to lose track of time when you are caught up in the December holidays. When you have to run around ensuring there is enough food for your visiting family, or getting more drinks and snacks for that barbeque you have planned at home. Travelling with kids can also be quite a challenge. Set up some time every day to have a deep conversation with your partner, talk to them about your thoughts, feelings, worries or concerns. This catch-up can be between 10 to 30 minutes or longer. You will feel connected to your partner, as well as be on the same page about what is happening. Healthy Boundaries. When it comes to boundaries, it is often difficult to make heathy ones between your spouse and your family members. Whether it’s a trip to the village for some days, or having different family members or parents over for Christmas, it is always a juggling job. One thing to remember is that your spouse is your closest and most committed person; therefore, try to remain consistent in how you treat them. Avoid taking sides, avoid ganging up or allowing abusive behaviour to create partitions between your spouse and your family.


Health and Wellness

Christmas doesn’t come from a store. Maybe perhaps Christmas means a little bit more’ Dr Suess

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What does Christmas look like on the African continent? In other parts of the world, December is associated with cold dark days, some snow, and festive Christmas decor everywhere. I remember as a young girl I would get excited to put up a Christmas tree, decorations, and Christmas cards depicting Santa and his reindeer in a background of snowy hills. This was my idea of what Christmas is supposed to look like, not our hot and humid Decembers, with mangos and heavy rains towards the end of the year. More recently as I get older, I am discovering that our African version of Christmas is just as beautiful without the borrowed western tradition of snow, roast turkey, and Santa/Father Christmas. There are many traditions that are carried out across out continent where this festival has been transformed beyond a religious event into an excuse to party and feast like there’s no tomorrow. The essence of being African lies in our diversity as a people, as well as our many similarities. Here are just a few out of the many December traditions you are likely to find in Africa. The Great Migration

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In many African cities, people wait for the December holidays to travel back to their home village for Christmas and New Year. There is a great migration of city folk who have families in their village who go back bearing gifts, food, drinks, and their family members. Places like the Eastern Cape and Durban in South Africa often see an influx in holiday makers from the other parts of the country. Large parties, music festivals, and braais are organized during this time. Meanwhile some cities like Lagos, Accra, Windhoek, and Harare usually become empty during December. The upside of this December 2021


migration is the huge business that city dwellers bring to the smaller towns and villages through boosting tourism, accommodation, and transportation. The downside to this is the often reckless behaviour seen especially among the youth as they drink and revel in unsafe conditions. COVID 19 is one of the most easily transmittable infections that may be passed around through this seasonal migration, as well as HIV/Aids and other sexually transmitted diseases. A New Wardrobe In the past, Christmas used to be about wearing a new outfit to church on Christmas day, then coming home to enjoy rice with chicken, and a bottle of Fanta or Coke. Most Malawians will relate to this, and it is still a common theme in many African countries. For the majority of Africans, Christmas is not just about alcohol and an overindulgence of food. Going to church and honouring the birth of Christ through religious services is often a must. Therefore, what better way to do that than in a new outfit specially reserved for this day. From new shoes, a new dress or suit, and a new hairstyle; it is all part of the essence of Christmas day. Christmas Church Service

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Although Christmas is founded on the Christian story of the birth of Jesus Christ, it has in modern times become commercialized with more focus on material things. In some parts of the world, most people rarely associate Christmas with religion but most do link it with Father Christmas, a mythical figure who is believed to deliver presents to all well behaved people on Christmas eve. In many African countries, you cannot have Christmas without going to church. Some churches even have overnight prayers from Christmas eve into Christmas day to celebrate the birth of Jesus Christ. On Christmas morning, many churches are filled with worshipers going to listen to the same sermon on nativity that they have been hearing for years. Churches are usually decorated with Christmas trees and lights. Children often have plays to tell the story of the nativity, or sing carols as part of the service. Christmas Feasts The best thing we can all agree about Christmas is that there is often very good food. Despite out different palates Africans can agree that food eaten on Christmas day has a different flavor, tastes much better and has to be eaten in large quantities. The more people you December 2021


have around your dinner table, the better. Some homes encourage one to bring a dish, some just invite you with your heathy appetite. Sharing and making merry together is generally considered the norm on this day.

party to another, or to invite others to their own parties. Christmas time is also a time when people visit the less fortunate to bring cheer through singing carols, and to give presents. Visits to the prisons, hospitals, and orphanages are often top of the list.

If you are in the rural areas of Malawi, some families will have a goat or cow slaughtered for Christmas day. Some are content with preparing a chicken and buying soft drinks or thobwa brewed especially. In South Africa, sheep’s head or skopo is a common treat to have at Christmas, Ghanaians usually bring out their popular jollof rice served with delicious soups and stews. In Angola, you are likely to eat pirão (similar to kondowole dish), while in Madagascar after a feast of rice with pork or beef, they bring out their favourite dessert of special cake and lychees fruit.

The African Christmas The African Christmas cannot be packaged into one definition. Our diversity and unique traditions makes our continent a lively one when it comes to the festive season. As our South African friends like to put it Dezember is often a feeling rather than just a month. However, what sets Africa apart is our tendency to celebrate Christmas as a community event rather than the smaller, more cozy family affairs that are common in some western countries.

Ubuntu As Christmas is known to be a season of sharing, you will rarely find Africans celebrating it alone. Visiting family and friends is one of the activities of Christmas day. Often it is to share food or presents, to wish each other well, and sometimes it is a chance for children to show off their presents or new outfits to their friends. For those who like to party, this is usually the time to go from one 27 | E s s e n t i a l G r a c e M a g a z i n e

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Voice of Thanksgiving Surrounded by the sounds of cries from all the corners of the earth caused by this pandemic. Not even knowing what will happen tomorrow. Yet I saw You covering me with your wings. Yes, you are right. For some, life has changed and will never get easier. But the hope and faith that I have in you always gives me a reason to move forward. I know that one day I will drink some tea with milk in my own cup. What would I be without you? A laughing stock, indeed I would have been to those that don’t wish me well. There were days and sleepless nights, wondering what will happen from one day to the next. The pandemic had me searching for ideas. Then, I saw you coming to the rescue, allowing me to enter into Your secret place of peace. The ideas I absorbed to my fullest capacity with songs of praises on my lips. I remember those days when the clear roads I used to pass seemed to closed. Like in a dream, You created a new path especially for me to pass through. There were days that I had tears on my cheeks flowing like the waters of the Yangtze River. You wiped them and dried them with your caring hand. You have been faithful to me. Your son is saying thank you my Lord Jesus Christ. Merry Christmas and Happy New Year! 28 | E s s e n t i a l G r a c e M a g a z i n e

Mr George N. Chidimbah Munthali is an employee of Mzuzu University and is currently in his final year at the University of Yangtze, China. He is Majoring in Agri-Economics. As we clock 20 months with the COVID 19 pandemic, lets spare a thought for the people living where this all started. China is a large country with many Malawian expats and students living resident there. One of our very own editors Dr Mtendere Kishindo has been living in Wuhan for several years. Let us remember them as we mark yet another December whilst under the ongoing impact of the COVID 19 pandemic around the world.

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