29
may issue
W
e live in a society filled with unrealistic expectations and pressures to fit into a cookie cutter mold of the “perfect” person. Over the last several decades, women in many cultures have spoken out about the imbalances of patriarchal societies, unrealistic expectations, and unfair working opportunities, and with the rise of social media, more and more societal pressures have risen to have the “perfect” body and live the “perfect” lifestyle. Recently, some influencers and organizations have spoken out about the unrealistic lives plastered on the internet which is a major step to improving the well-being of society. However, there is one flaw. Most people are now aware of the unbelievable standards for women, but many do not identify similar unrealistic expectations for men. Everyone is influenced by the pressures of society as young as their early childhood. Influences on boys are not always apparent but they shape the men of our society, and we should be more conscious of them and challenge them more frequently. Although there is nothing wrong with masculinity, it should not be the only thing that defines men. Masculine traits include being the leader of the house, never showing vulnerability, identifying heterosexual, being strong and athletic, competitive, and independent. Nothing is wrong with having these traits and there is nothing wrong with not having any of these traits.
BOYS CAN BE BOYS Toxic Masculinity and Gender Expectations in Society
One masculine trait specifically, lack of vulnerability, can be very damaging to both men and women. Due to the lack of identification of these standards, society steals healthy coping methods from boys who then resort to isolation or anger in replacement of vulnerability. In fact, many studies show that the reason domestic violence between couples is so unfortunately common is in part due to the incredibly unrealistic expectations men are held to every day. Unfortunately, schools have not been the best place to speak out on these unrealistic norms. The activities students participate in, the people they hang out with, and the classes they take are all influenced by society in one way or another. Examples of toxic masculinity can be found in students’ daily lives from conversations with friends to participating in class. Unfortunately, these masculine standards can spark bullying like the calling of derogatory terms or physical abuse. From a survey of 55 high school students, 54% said they fear judgment if they were to participate in non-traditional activities for their gender. So the question remains, what can we as a community do to decreases the social pressures on men? Although it won’t happen overnight, the first steps we can take are to eliminate gendered insults and accept the idea that boys have feelings. If we all open our minds a little bit and stop focusing on “boys will be boys”, we can significantly improve the well-being of society and take one step closer to equality.
payton wozny editorial board
