Everything was a haze of heat and blood, the groan emitting from his lips only a distant echo. Nothing made any clear sense as Gideon fought for control.
Somebody was thrusting something into his hand, and he tried to speak, tried to ask for help, but all that came out was a low noise that he barely recognized as his voice. And all the while, the ache in his shoulder grew worse.
“You must sign this. The doctor will not see you unless you do.” Even that made very little sense. Gideon squeezed his eyes closed, battling through darkness and pain to align his thoughts. Why should the surgeon refuse to come to the aid of a gentleman? It was not as though he did not have the money to pay. All the more disorientated, Gideon opened his eyes and tried to focus on the face in front of him, but it was naught but a blur. “Sign it.”
The voice was darker this time, the words louder. Trying to work out whether he was sitting or standing, Gideon turned his head as something was pushed into his hand. He blinked rapidly in an attempt to clear his vision. Was that a quill he now held? Why would his fingers not clamp around it with their usual strength?
No further questions could even be considered for, at that very moment, something pressed on his shoulder, and he let out a scream of pain.
“Sign this, or you shall die here without the surgeon ever having come to your aid.”
The pain brought a sudden sharpness to his vision but, even then, Gideon could not comprehend what was taking place. Without being fully aware of what he was doing, his fingers clumsily etched out his signature as he struggled to focus on the paper in front of him. His mind was screaming with confusion, terrified that the threat would come to pass if he did not do otherwise. In an instant, the pain in his shoulder lessened, but the circumstances did not become any clearer. Someone was moving him, someone was leading him somewhere – and then cold air ran across his skin.
He fell back heavily, another jolt of pain slicing through his head.
“The surgeon.”
His agonized, desperate call for help was only a broken whisper and, as his vision blurred again, Gideon was trapped in a dreadful fear that he was to be left entirely alone until death slowly beckoned him. He fought desperately to open his eyes, catching a glimpse of what looked like a red-framed door. But his strength began to fail him, even as he battled to work out where he was, and who had been speaking to him – and after but a few moments, everything faded to darkness.
IT WAS pain that brought him back. Terrifying and overwhelming darkness had pulled him in, but now it was with relief that he slowly came back to himself.
“You have returned to us.” A voice pressed in at his consciousness, forcing him back all the more quickly. “We have been so very worried.”
Something cool was pressed against his forehead, but Gideon forced his eyes to open. Taking in heavy breaths, he attempted to push himself up, only for the pain to shoot down his right side. It took him some moments to gather himself, but when his gaze finally cleared, he recognized three of his friends who had been with him during the previous evening’s gambling.
“What has happened? His voice was hoarse and dry, but he urged himself to sit up again, pushing away the cool compress as he gritted his teeth against the pain. “Where am I?”
“You are in your townhouse. Someone attacked you last evening.” Lord Wiltsham spread his hands, his expression pinched. “I myself have only just recovered from my stupor, although you have a good deal more to deal with.”
“Attacked me?” Sitting up a little more, Gideon accepted the glass of water from his servant’s hand, taking a long draught. “I do not understand.”
His body felt weak and tired, but his mind simply refused to let him free.
“You recall that we went to the East End of London last evening? It was on Lord Gillespie’s recommendation.”
“Yes, I do recall it. I do not recall if he stayed to play with us, however.”
“Nor do I.” Lord Pottinger put in, as Gideon frowned at the pallor on his friend’s face. “In fact, I do not believe that any of us can recall where Lord Gillespie went, once he had directed us to those ‘copper hells’.”
“That does not mean anything, does it?”
Still struggling to understand what his friends were saying. Gideon winced as he shifted slightly, his shoulder aching terribly. Lord Gillespie was a close acquaintance, known to all of them as a gentleman of good character, which was why he could not understand the dark expression on each of their faces. Had they wished to enjoy the evening elsewhere? Or perhaps they had not been as successful in their gambling as Lord Gillespie had suggested. He tried to shrug, then immediately regretted it.
“You must be careful of that shoulder,” Lord Wiltsham muttered. “As much as it pains you, there is yet more to say, which I fear will pain you all the more. Your shoulder will heal. But the injury I am about to reveal to you now will not so easily mend. “
Concern grew and Gideon shifted forward on his feet, ignoring the stab of pain which came with it.
“What are you speaking of?”
“Thus far we have alldiscovered that our wealth is gone.”
Gideon blinked rapidly.
“I do not understand what you mean.”
Lord Pottinger ran one hand down his face and Gideon’s stomach twisted, the pain in his shoulder no longer appearing to be of any significance.
Lord Wiltsham threw up his hands, then let them fall.
“Last evening I evidently signed my fortune over to a Baron March, whose name I do not recognize. He has taken every single coin that I possess. I have nothing left.”
“Mine is gone also, although not quite under the same circumstances,” Lord Silverton stated, his voice so quiet that Gideon strained to make out the words. “I very much fear that you will find yourself in the same situation.
“For that is the situation I am in also,” added Lord Thornbridge, who had not spoken as yet.
The white of his face contrasted with his dark, shadowed eyes and red slash of his mouth.
Gideon’s own fears began to grow as he closed his eyes before taking a deep breath. Everything was still clouded at the edges. He could not seem to fully grasp all that was being said to him, and yet his stomach was churning uncontrollably as an overwhelming sense of dread clutched at his heart.
Could it be true? Had he lost everything?
“M
C H A P T E R O N E
y dear girl. How are you?”
Lady Sara sat quietly, staring down at her hands as they clasped gently in her lap. She could not give any answer to her mother’s question. The shock was still much too great.
“But…” Shaking her head, she struggled to find the words, tears building in her eyes. “How could he do such a thing? How can this be?”
“It is disgraceful, of course.” Reaching out, her mother squeezed her fingers lightly. “I am glad you are not to wed him, my dear. He is clearly a gentleman without scruples.”
“I… I do not understand.” The tears formed far too quickly, too fast for her to blink him all away, trickling down onto her cheeks as she fought for breath. “How can this be so?”
Her mother shook her head.
“There is no particular reason, my dear girl, other than to say that he is a gentleman who is unworthy of you. I can only hope that he will not have a single moment of happiness for the rest of his days, for what he has done to you.” Her mother placed a lace handkerchief in Sara’s hand, and it took her a few moments to realize what it was, and what she was meant to do with it. The shock ran like lightning through her veins, refusing to free her, refusing to allow her to think clearly. How could Lord Coatbridge do such a thing to her? He had promised her so much, and was now
abandoning her entirely, leaving her with nothing. “I wish I could say or do something which would take away your pain at present.” Her mother’s voice rasped, and she was feeling the pain of all that Sara was enduring. “It is a disgrace, nothing less. No gentleman should court a young lady and then take himself from her to declare his betrothal to another!”
To hear it spoken of again in such clear terms sent an arrow straight through Sara’s heart. Her breath came in uneven gasps as she squeezed her eyes closed, trying desperately not to break down into yet more furious tears.
“Oh, my dear.” Her mother squeezed her hand again. “My words were not wisely chosen. Forgive me for my inconsideration.”
“It is not you that I need to forgive, Mama. In truth, I can barely take it in! Only yesterday he was sitting in this very room declaring that he cared for me more than ever before. How can he then go on to decide that he is betrothed to another young lady only a few hours later? And how could she accept him, if they have not been courting? I cannot understand it.”
“Nor can I.” There were tears in her mother’s voice. “I was quite sure he was to propose to you very soon. I thought we would be together packing your wedding chest. Instead, we shall be left with the tonasking many questions, wondering why he has set you aside, why he has turned from you to favor another.”
Sara shook her head wordlessly, suddenly afraid that her reputation was about to suffer a great deal at Lord Coatbridge’s hands. Where she had thought him considerate, it now appeared that he was thoughtless. Where she had thought him generous, he was selfish. She had believed that he cared for her deeply, but this betrothal proved that there was not even a hint of affection on his part. He had forgotten her already, set her aside so that he might wed another.
“This Lady Nora, whoever she may be, will be nothing compared to you, I am quite sure.”
Sara did not even lift her head.
“If that was true, Mama, then he would have chosen to betroth himself to me and not to her.”
Lady Longford opened her mouth but then closed it again tightly. She turned her head away, and silence built between them. That silence did not last long - her mother broke it soon after.
“It will be because of her dowry, or whatever fortune her father is willing to give his daughter. There will be some reason for it, my dear. It is not that you are lacking in anyway.”
The truth did not bring any comfort to Sara’s broken heart. Despite telling herself that the man meant nothing to her, and that she had no need to feel any such torment, she found her tears insisting that they remain rather than flee as she had hoped. Lord Coatbridge had been eager in his attentions towards her, and the fact that he had asked to court her so soon after their introduction had sent both excitement and anticipation through Sara in a way that she had never before experienced. She had believed herself quite safe in allowing herself such feelings, for he had promised her that they would soon be betrothed, such was the depth of his own feelings. Now, it seemed that he had been playing her for a fool.
“You must go on into the Season with your head held high.” Her mother spoke with great determination, her thoughts already on the weeks ahead, rather than the present circumstances. “Everyone will be watching you. They will be eager to see how you respond to this, particularly given that Lord Coatbridge will be present also. You must give them no cause for gossip. Laugh and smile as if you are just as you have always been. There must not be a single trace of sadness in your expression, even though you will be feeling quite the opposite inside.”
Sara shook her head.
“I cannot go into society for some time, I fear. I need time to consider all that has taken place.”
Her mother shook her head.
“No. We are to attend this evening, just as we have planned.”
Sara’s head shot up.
“Mama, I cannot. It is much too soon for me, given that I have only just heard this dreadful news. My heart is still too sick with pain.”
Her mother tossed her head.
“Nonsense. It will appear that you are greatly affected by his betrothal if you remain at home, and then a more gossip would be said about you. That would not be a wise decision to take, my dear. We must show society that you are not affected by this in any way whatsoever.”
“But I amaffected. Deeply, deeply, affected.”
“Be that as it may, you will hide that from everyone,” her mother instructed firmly. “I know that the ton will be fully aware of his betrothal and there will be whispers about you already, of course. We cannot allow them to grow, so therefore, you must present a happy front to make certain that everyone believes there was nothing of any consequence between you. Only then will I be satisfied. Your heart may be broken, my dear, but your reputation must be protected.”
Sara looked away. She could do nothing but agree with her mother. The lady would not stand for any sort of refusal on her part. Despite her own misgivings, and in spite of her own wishes, she would have to attend the ball this evening, putting on as many pretty smiles as she could, hoping that society would accept the lie that she was presenting them.
“Very well.”
Her mother beamed as this was the end of her troubles, as if this single agreement would resolve her difficulties and send light into her future.
“Good. This is exactly what we need at this moment. Do not allow his behavior to ruin your chances of future happiness.”
Wiggling one finger at Sara, her mother rose to ring the bell for tea. “You know very well that gentlemen in society will not be eager to court a young lady whose heart still belongs to another.”
“Lord Coatbridge did not steal my heart, mama.” Sitting up a little straighter, Sara shot a firm look towards her mother. “I will not pretend that my heart has not been affected, but I certainly did not love him. I cared for him, at least, but it was nothing more than that.”
AlthoughIbelieveitcameveryclosetoit.
“I am glad to hear it,” her mother replied spiritedly. “We shall certainly have no cause at all to remain at home this evening. I expect you to be ready and prepared at the expected time. We will notbe tardy.”
Sara nodded, mute. Try as she might, she could not get rid of the feeling that her reputation should be of lesser importance than her heart. There was certainly a good deal of anger and upset lingering within her heart, but there was also a great weight of pain. Pain that she had been discarded without even a hint of consideration.
“I think I should like to take a short walk in the garden. Perhaps I will rest for a time in the arbor.”
“An excellent idea,” her mother replied, a warm encouragement in her voice. “I look forward to seeing you this evening - oh, and make sure to wear one of your finest gowns.”
“Yes, Mama.”
Managing a quick smile, Sara walked to the door, her heart pounding furiously as she fought against a cresting wave of emotion. It was not until she reached her bedchamber, however, that she broke down completely. Tears ran down her cheeks and she made no effort to dash any of them away. Her mother was sympathetic, certainly, but she was too concerned with reputation and was eager to do all that she could to preserve it and have Sara restored to society as quickly as possible.
Had Sara been given the choice, she would have remained at home, resting quietly under the heavy load of sadness and sorrow. Instead, she would be forced to push away everything that she felt so that she might instead focus on appearing happy and contented in front of those she cared very little about.
“I shall see him there this evening.” As she spoke aloud, the misery cut to the very heart of the matter. She would be forced to see, and perhaps even speak with, Lord Coatbridge. Perhaps he might seek her out, wanting to make sure that there were no particularly damaging rumors running through society that might injure his newly betrothed. “I do not know if I will be able to speak with him.”
The memory of her laughing and speaking with Lord Coatbridge struck a jarring pain through her again, but Sara dried her eyes on her handkerchief and set it in her lap, her fingers playing with the lace edge.
It had been true, what she had said to her mother - she was not in love with him. Having never experienced such a great emotion, she was quite certain that she could not be so, for there was no great intensity of feeling which had risen up within her whenever she had laid eyes on him. Her heart was broken, yes, but that was due to the future he had offered her being torn away; the promises that he had given her now completely broken. All of his words were made meaningless, and her perception of his character was now entirely shattered and would never be able to be restored again. She would have to attend this evening, and see him with this new young lady, knowing that everything he had ever told her, everything she had ever believed, had been nothing more than a lie.
Yet despite my wish to stay at home, my mother insists that I attend this evening so that I am forced to be in hiscompany once more.
Taking a deep breath, she set her shoulders and lifted her chin as a flame of anger lit the edge of her sadness and upset. Her mother should not be forcing her into this, but neither should Lord Coatbridge have treated her with such disdain. Somehow, she was going to have to find enough grace and courage to get through the evening without losing either her composure or her temper… and that might prove very difficult indeed.
THE SENSE of being quite at odds with everyone else in the room was a rather unsettling one and Sara drew in great gulps of air in the hope that she might be able to keep her emotions in check. Her face was already sore from her fixed smile, and her hands were clenching and unclenching as she walked around the room, hoping to keep to the shadows. She was wearing her finest gown - at her mother’s
existence, of course - but her hair had taken so long to style that she had almost fallen asleep in the chair. One large braid curved from one side of her head to the other just above her forehead, whilst smaller braids came from under it, pulling back until long curls exploded, rushing down against her shoulders. Her eyes were clear, but her smile remained forced. Sara was certain that she looked well and certainly, no one would be able to state that Lady Sara had been pale and wan.
“Good evening. Lady Sara.”
Sara started, whirling around and fully expecting to see some gossip of the ton, eager to get to know exactly how she was feeling at the news of Lord Coatbridge’s betrothal, but much to her relief, that was none other than her dear friend, Miss Hannah Cartwright.
“Hannah.” Reaching out, she grasped her hand. “I am so very glad to see you this evening.”
“I confess I am a little surprised to see you present. I would have thought that you would want to remain at home this evening.”
Sara pulled a face.
“You have heard then?”
“Yes, I have done so. I believe almost everyone in society has heard of Lord Coatbridge’s sudden betrothal. It is a little strange, is it not? I thought that he was courting you!”
“As did I.” Sara tried to laugh but the sound did not quite come out of her lips. “This has been a great shock to me. I would have much preferred to remain at home and give myself the opportunity to come to terms with this news. But Mama was most insistent that I appear this evening. I believe she did not wish me to hide away, thinking of my reputation, of course.”
“That must be difficult for you, however.” Looping one arm through Sara’s, Hannah gave her a small smile. “But I am here with you this evening. You shall be able to face whatever is thrown at you, I am sure of it. You have enough strength of character to endure.”
“I must hope so.” A slight wobble came into her voice, and she looked away. “I shall tell you that I had come to care for Lord Coatbridge. That may have been foolish of me, but after everything
that he promised me, I could not help but feel something. It was not any sort of great love, at least, but I had been affected by what he had promised me in terms of our future together.”
“I quite understand.” Hannah’s sympathetic voice was a balm to her pain. “I can well understand that you wish to keep such feelings hidden from everyone else, however. What he has done has been the biggest betrayal.”
“I simply do not understand it. If there was an explanation, then I might feel a little better, but as such there is not.”
“In that regard, his behavior has been very strange, I grant you. I do not understand firstly, why he would turn his back on you and, secondly, why he would betroth himself to someone else so very quickly. There has been no obvious attachment between them, has there?”
“There has been nothing whatsoever,” Sara agreed. “Not as far as I was aware at least.”
“Not as far as the ton was aware either, otherwise it would not have come as such a great surprise, and there would not be so many tongues wagging.”
Sara rolled her eyes and Hannah sighed in sympathy.
“They are all eager to speak with you this evening. I am sure that I have already heard at least three ladies stating that they are certain you will be heartbroken. I was quick to reassure them that you were a good deal more sensible than that.”
Sara smiled.
“Thank you for coming to my defense. Perhaps my mother was right to insist that I attend this evening, loath as I am to admit it.”
“You must keep your head held high and a genial expression on your face,” Hannah added. “They will all be looking at you.” She stopped suddenly, her hand tightening on Sara’s arm. “Prepare yourself, my dear. He has arrived.”
Even as Hannah tugged her into motion again, Sara did not need to ask who she was talking about. Her stomach dropped to the floor as they continued to promenade slowly around the room. She did not look to the left, nor to the right, albeit with a tingling awareness that Lord Coatbridge was present.
“Where is he?” she hissed. “Can you see him?”
Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Hannah glance over her shoulder, followed by a swift intake of breath.
“He is walking towards us,” came the reply. “And he is arm in arm with his… betrothed.”
“Then we must walk a little more swiftly,” Sara determined. “Or mayhap we ought to stand somewhere quietly so that he can pass us and make his way to other guests within the ballroom, who are no doubt eager to see him.”
She and Hannah were about to do the latter when a sudden, familiar voice reached her ears.
“Good evening, Lady Sara. Good evening, Miss Cartwright.”
What struck her the most was the joviality with which he spoke, appearing to indicate that he was very pleased to see her, whilst for her, he was the last person she wished to be in company with.
Turning around, she kept her expression cool, despite her mother’s warning that she ought to smile in such a situation. When she met Lord Coatbridge’s eyes, one eyebrow arched as she looked back into his face, seeing the slight flush which colored his cheeks.
“Good evening, Lord Coatbridge,” she murmured, entirely unaware as to whether or not Hannah had already said this. “Please introduce us to the young lady on your arm.”
She did not look at the young lady in question, but kept her gaze fixed on Lord Coatbridge, who had now gone a deeper shade of red.
“But of course.” He cleared his throat, and his voice cracked a little as he spoke. “This is Lady Nora. Her father is the Marquess of Westerly.” As he spoke, his eyes turned towards the lady and he sent her a warm smile, which then faded as he turned back toward Sara. “Lady Nora, this is Lady Sara and her acquaintance, Miss Cartwright.”
From the warm smile on Lady Nora’s face, Sara did not think that she had any knowledge of who she was, in relation to Lord Coatbridge. In many ways, she felt rather sorry for the young lady, if she did not know of their connection, nor the tension that swirled between them now. Had she truly been naïve enough to believe that Lord Coatbridge’s interest was genuine in its swiftness? Had she not
heard that Lord Coatbridge had been courting Sara for these last few weeks? Perhaps she had not been in society for very long.
“Good evening, Lady Sara.” Lady Nora smiled, her eyes bright. “You are well acquainted with Lord Coatbridge, I hear?”
There was a gentleness to her tone which had Sara wincing inwardly. Did this creature truly believe that there was only an acquaintance between herself and Lord Coatbridge? Was that what she had been told?
“Yes, we are very well acquainted.” Glancing away from the young lady, she looked towards Lord Coatbridge, a little surprised to see him drop his head. Was he embarrassed over what he had done? Ashamed, mayhap? Or was it more likely that he simply wished to keep Lady Nora from knowing the truth? “In fact, Lord Coatbridge and I were courting for a short while.”
Lord Coatbridge lifted his head sharply, his eyes meeting hers. The red in his cheeks slowly changed to white as he stared at her, but Sara did not care. The injury he had caused her had been so great that she had no willingness now to remain silent and permit him to merely enjoy the happiness which came with being Lady Nora’s betrothed. Nor did she want Lady Nora to believe that there was nothing of significance between herself and Lord Coatbridge. The young lady deserved to know the truth, she decided.
“You… You were courting.” Lady Nora blinked, then forced a smile that did nothing to take the shadows from her eyes. “That must have been some time ago.”
Sara opened her mouth to say that it had been only yesterday and up until today, she had believed they were still courting, only for a gentle nudge to catch her attention.
“That is something I believe Lord Coatbridge can discuss with you. Now is neither the time nor the place to be having such discussions.” Miss Cartwright spoke quickly, irritating Sara with her determination to move the conversation on. “My heartfelt congratulations, Lady Nora. Pray excuse me. Excuse us.”
So saying, she slipped one hand through Sara’s arm again and half dragged her away from Lord Coatbridge and Lady Nora. Anger
built like a wave within Sara’s chest as she turned furious eyes upon her friend.
“Whatever did you do that for? I had a good deal more to say.”
“But you would have been cruel to do so, and you are never cruel, Sara. At least, I believe you are not.”
When they reached the other side of the room, Miss Cartwright turned so that they were facing Lady Nora and Lord Coatbridge and Sara followed her gaze. Lady Nora had pulled herself back from Lord Coatbridge and was standing with folded arms, looking up at him with an angry tilt to her chin.
“I understand that you are angry, and you have every right to be so, but it would not be like you to cause another pain. Do not allow your upset to bring viciousness to your actions.”
Sara drew in a deep breath, and her shoulders dropped as her anger faded away.
“You are right, Hannah.” She was not callous, and yet had been about to declare all to Lady Nora in the middle of the ballroom, knowing the damage it would have done and the scandal it would have caused. Lady Nora would have been gravely injured by what Sara would have said, and she would never have been able to recover from that. “My anger is directed towards Lord Coatbridge, not Lady Nora,” she murmured as Hannah nodded. “You are right, my dear friend. I ought not to say anything which would injure the lady, although I do believe that she should know the truth. Thank you for pulling me away.”
“I am just glad that I do not also have to face your wrath!” Miss Cartwright chuckled, making Sara laugh softly in return. “Come now, attempt to enjoy the ball this evening as best as you can. I believe Lord Coatbridge will have a less than pleasant time of it.”
Sara smiled darkly.
“Which is precisely what he deserves.”
C H A P T E R T W O
“P
erhaps it is just as well that I came to London.”
“I certainly can recommend it,” Lord Wiltsham chuckled, and Gideon grinned as his friend slipped one hand around his betrothed’s waist. It was good to see Lord Wiltsham so happy.
“If we have managed to give you a little hope, then yes, it is very good that you came,” Lord Foster added, handing a brandy around to everyone. “That is two of us who have regained our fortunes now. You shall be the third, I am sure.”
Gideon shook his head.
“I am not yet convinced to stay in London, however, although I am glad that I was here to be of assistance to you, Wiltsham. I do not think there is as much hope for me. I already signed the contract and am now a Marquess without fortune. That much I can recall, at least.”
“I did the very same and now here I stand, with my fortune returned.” Lord Wiltsham put out one hand towards him. “There is no reason that you cannot do as we have done, and we are here to be of aid to you.”
“Although I am soon to make my way back to my estate in preparation for my marriage,” Lord Foster reminded them both. “But I would agree with Lord Wiltsham. You should stay here, Stoneleigh. I am sure that there will be much for you to discover.”
“But I have very little to move forward with,” Gideon protested. “I only vaguely remember what happened, and I have my ongoing difficulties with my arm to prove it.”
He lifted his right arm as high as it would go, turning his wrist over left to right. There was a stiffness there that never left him now, ever since the evening of the injury. He was doing all he could to restore it to its full strength, but everything he tried seemed to bring him either pain or a lack of success, which irritated him all the more.
“All the same, I believe that you should remain here. Go back to where you recall being that evening. Search for clues if you must. I will do whatever I can to be of assistance to you, just as Lord Foster was to me. And you are to reside with me for as long as you require it. I would offer to return you to your own townhouse, but given that it is currently let out to another family…”
Lord Wiltsham swung one hand then dropped it to his side.
“I certainly appreciate that.” Gideon gave him a quick smile, silently reminding himself that he had every intention of returning to his estate without delay. “There is much for me to do back at the estate, however. I must look at my situation and attempt to do everything I can to be as financially secure as possible, given the circumstances.”
Besides which, I do not want the ton to become even more aware oftheinjurytomy arm.Theywouldonlygossipaboutme all themore.
“I think you would be wise to give yourself a little more time before you return.”
“I am well aware of that, but I must keep my own counsel.”
“Of course you must.” This time it was not any of his friends who spoke, but rather Miss Carshaw, who was Lord Wiltsham’s betrothed “I will say, however, that Lord Wiltsham found himself in the very same position as you are at present. He believed that he had no hope and no prospect of finding his fortune. But after a short while, he began to see that there was in fact, a little chink of light. That light has now brought us together, and our future is secure once more. I am not suggesting that you cannot keep your own counsel
but only to say that there isstill a light of hope for you, if you would only seek it in what is otherwise a great darkness.”
Nodding slowly, Gideon considered this, knowing full well that Miss Carshaw was speaking not only of the situation that Lord Wiltsham had found himself in, but also of her own situation which had only recently been resolved. Could there be any real hope?
“I shall consider it at least, although I do not know how one is meant to return to society after such a thing.” A sorrowful laugh broke from him. “I have been afflicted by the blue-devils since the whole affair took place and I am certain that, by now, that the ton will know of my lack of wealth.”
Miss Lawrence tilted her head, having sat silently thus far.
“You may find yourself a little surprised to know that not everyone is aware of the rest of the gentlemen who have lost their fortunes. You have always been a rather quiet and contained gentleman, have you not, Lord Stoneleigh? Perhaps that is to your advantage in this situation. I do not think that’s the ton have any awareness of your lack of funds at present. However, they will know that you have let out your town house for the Season.”
“But that could easily be explained by the fact that you did not think you would be coming to London this year and thus thought to serve another family by permitting them to reside there,” Lord Foster suggested quickly. “I should not concern yourself with that.”
Gideon shook his head.
“The ton will find out somehow, however. Mayhap it may be the wisest course of action to return home.”
“Well, should you change your mind, you may be sure of our company.” Miss Carshaw smiled at him. “It might be a wise thought to return to society with friends by your side. You shall not be as entirely on your own as you might otherwise be.”
Gideon allowed himself a small laugh.
“I believe you are all quite intent on my remaining in London, are you not?”
Nobody smiled as he had expected. Indeed, nobody even laughed but instead, they simply glanced at one another.
“It is only because we want to see you as we are,” Lord Foster explained. “Both Lord Wiltsham and I know the struggles you face at present. That difficulty will not leave you, my friend. You will spend the rest of your days in such a struggle. That is, unless you are able to find a way to change your situation.”
“Which you believe I am able to do.”
There was not a great deal of hope left in his heart. Yes, both of his friends had regained their fortunes, but he kept no such hope for himself. After all, he could still recall signing the document. Yes, it had been under duress, but that meant very little. He had still done it. He had still willingly, if not actually knowingly, signed away his fortune. In that regard, he was entirely different from his friends, was he not?
But allthesame, he mused. perhaps it would bea wise idea to make my way back into society with those I consider my closest friends. That way I will be able to judge society’s response to my continuedpresenceinLondon.IwouldknowwhetherornotIamto findanywelcomehere.
His resolve to return home was fading a little as he looked into each of his friend’s eyes. Both Lord Wiltsham and Lord Foster wished for him to remain, promising that they would do whatever they could to help him regain his fortune. Miss Lawrence and Miss Carshaw were both eagerly looking at him, a small smile dancing across each mouth. It was obvious that they very much wished for him to remain in London, clearly filled with the same hope for him, as had brought them and their particular gentlemen such great happiness.
“Perhaps I shall attend one ball before my return.” This brought a slight squeal of delight from Miss Carshaw and a warm smile from Miss Lawrence. His two friends merely grinned, nodding as though they took credit for being able to convince him to linger. “This does not mean that I am staying in London. It means only that I am attending just to see what society’s reaction might be to my presence.”
“Regardless of your reason, I am simply delighted that you have chosen to stay for a little while longer.” Lord Wiltsham clapped him
on the back and Gideon winced at the resulting jolt of pain which ran across his frame. “Another brandy perhaps?”
“Let us hope that I am making the right decision!” Gideon accepted a glass from Lord Wiltsham, smiling despite his ongoing concern. “And where is it that we are to go this evening?”
Gideon looked around the room as Miss Carshaw and Lord Wiltsham exchanged a glance.
“There is a ball this evening. It is meant to be a grand affair, and indeed there is already a great deal of rumor surrounding it. Perhaps that would be the best one for you to attend.”
It was not like his friends to think about rumor and gossip.
“What rumor?”
Miss Lawrence shrugged her shoulders.
“A particular gentleman has decided he is going to betroth himself to a particular young lady, despite having been courting someone entirely different,” she explained. “I can guarantee that everyone present will be talking of that and not of you. It may be a little bit disheartening for the young lady involved, but at least it will take any interest in you away.”
“Mayhap I should be rather grateful to this young lady - whoever she is - for having stolen this gentleman’s attention and drawn away the interest of the ton.” Wincing at his own harsh words, he shrugged one shoulder. “Very well. I shall attend the ball this evening and hope that it is as you say.”
ElseIshallreturn tomy estatewithoutdelay. Isee no reason to lingerhereanylongerthannecessary.
I AM nervousandIdislikebeingnervous.
Walking into the ballroom with his head held high, Gideon looked around the room with what he hoped was a distinguished air. He did not want to show any sense of anxiety, aware that hiding himself from society was perhaps not the wisest consideration at the present moment. If it was as had been suggested, then the tondid not know
about his loss of fortune since he had returned to his estate very soon after the incident had taken place. Miss Lawrence had been correct to say he was not a gentleman with a loud manner or an obvious desire for company. That went in his favor, perhaps, although as yet he could not say for certain that it was so.
“Good evening, how very good to see you again. I had heard that you had returned to your estate, but now I see that you are back in London!”
Gideon nodded, a little surprised and frustrated at the tightness in his chest.
“Yes, that is true, but I decided to return to London - only for a short while, however.”
“I am certainly very glad to have you in our company this evening.”
Lord Gilmartin – their host for the evening - was warm and kind, clearly unaware of the difficulties Gideon found himself in at present.
“I thank you.”
Gideon smiled, nodded, and stepped away, following Miss Lawrence and Lord Foster, noting that her family stood nearby, although none of them were looking at Miss Lawrence.
“I was sure nothing would be said of you.”
The delight in Miss Lawrence’s voice made him smile, despite his own ongoing nervousness.
“Yes, indeed you were, and it seems that you have been proven correct.”
“Then I am sure that you are glad you came,” she shot back, one eyebrow lifting gently. “Perhaps you will not find yourself as much of a stranger here this evening as you feared.”
“I quite agree. You need not worry so much, I think.” Lord Foster smiled at him, then his brows drew together. “How is your arm this evening?”
Gideon grimaced and shrugged.
“That is what I find the most embarrassing. I am sure that the ton will speculate as to my injury, and I cannot hide it from them either. I shall have to speak of it.”
“You ought not to be ashamed of your weakness. It is, after all, an injury that was done to you. It will take some time to heal.”
Gideon let out a slow breath.
“Yes, you are quite right.” His smile was brief for while he agreed with everything Miss Lawrence was saying, he did not feel as though he were able to do such a thing with any ease. Whenever a gentleman went to grip his hand, he had struggled to put the strength into his fingers that he’d once had, and oftentimes winced at others’ strong grasps. The pain shot down from his shoulder towards his hand with the stiffness in his fingers and his arm feeling as if it might never end.
“No doubt it will be mentioned at some point soon that I no longer have the strength in my arm that I once used to,” he grumbled as Miss Lawrence smiled softly. “I do not know what I shall say if someone should ask me how it came about.”
Miss Lawrence shrugged.
“You could simply state the truth,” she replied gently. “Say that you were attacked by an unknown assailant and that your attempts to recover have been successful thus far, but it will take a little longer for you to regain your former strength. As I have said, there is nothing that you need to be ashamed of.”
Gideon took in another deep breath and straightened his shoulders, looking around the room as he did so.
“You say that there are some other whispers this evening?” he reminded Miss Lawrence and Lord Foster, both of whom nodded fervently, with Lord Foster swiveling his head around as he looked about the room, as if in search of the very person they spoke of. Gideon cleared his throat. “Might you remind me what has taken place?”
“Certainly. Lord Coatbridge has been courting a young lady by the name of Lady Sara. To the ton’s surprise, he has suddenly declared himself betrothed to another.” Lord Foster shrugged. “There is no explanation for it as yet.”
Gideon lifted his eyebrows.
“Indeed. And he has given no reason for his swift betrothal?”
Miss Lawrence scowled.
“No, which, I believe, is part of the reason that so many will be watching him this evening. I believe that many are hopeful that this evening will explain all to them, although I myself have quite my own theory.”
“Oh?”
Even Lord Foster lifted an eyebrow and Miss Lawrence shrugged, a small, wry smile touching her mouth.
“What reason does a gentleman have to betroth himself to a young lady without much warning?” she asked, her eyes darkening slightly and no smile upon her lips any longer. “Perhaps he has behaved poorly, and today must make amends.”
Considering, Gideon lifted one shoulder.
“That may well be so, although there are other alternatives, of course. Perhaps the young lady has a father eager to wed her to any gentleman of quality and Lord Coatbridge has thought it an easy and suitable match Perhaps her father has offered a great dowry and Lord Coatbridge cannot refuse such a large sum.”
“Which would again make his character a good deal more questionable in my eyes,” Miss Lawrence returned. “Are you acquainted with the lady in question? Lady Sara? Her father is the Earl of Longford.”
“No, I do not believe I am.” Gideon smiled a little self-consciously, as he admitted to Miss Lawrence how little society he had enjoyed. “Prior to this - as you may well know, given what Lord Foster has told you about me - I have not been a gentleman often inclined towards a great many acquaintances. I am content with only a few very close friends. I have never felt the need to introduce myself to all and sundry. To my mind, it is a poor gentleman who boasts a vast number of acquaintances but has very few friends.”
A small flush of heat rose in his chest, but Miss Lawrence only smiled.
“I do not think that a poor choice, Lord Stoneleigh., I quite understand it. I admire it, in fact.”
Her eyes suddenly caught on something over Gideon’s shoulder and she craned her neck a little, forcing Gideon to give a small half
turn, noticing two young ladies walking towards the three of them. Miss Lawrence seemed to recognize them both.
“Do excuse me – and return my betrothed to me shortly, will you?”
Lord Foster grinned and then slipped away, as the two young ladies came to join them, frustrating Gideon’s attempts to speak further with Lord Foster.
“Miss Cartwright, Lady Sara.” Miss Lawrence smiled warmly, then dropped into a quick curtsey. “Good evening.”
“Good evening.”
Neither of the ladies were smiling, but Gideon found his attention caught by the brightness of one set of vivid blue eyes, although he did not know which young lady was which as yet. Coughing gently, he caught Miss Lawrence’s attention.
“Forgive me. Allow me to introduce The Marquess of Stoneleigh.”
She continued with the introductions as Gideon bowed, glad to know which was Lady Sara and which Miss Cartwright.
“I am very pleased to make your acquaintance.”
Now that he knew which lady was Lady Sara, he found his eyes lingering on her with a good deal more intensity. She was not overly tall, and had gentle curves that left his mind wandering to places it ought not. He should not be thinking about what it would be like to press a kiss to the delicate curve of her throat, nor wondering how blue her eyes would be, should he be standing a good deal closer to her. Indeed, it was a very strange thing for him to be thinking at all, for he was not a man inclined to such thoughts. He had always admired young ladies, yes, and had found them beautiful, charming, and quite delightful, but had never found himself drawn to one as he was in this moment.
“Lord Stoneleigh?”
A chill ran across Gideon’s skin, his feet shifting as he dropped his head, realizing that he had lost the thread of the conversation entirely. He had been far too busy trying to understand all that he was thinking and feeling, instead of paying any attention to what was being said.
