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Football united In August, medical students Neil Dalton and Aidan Brunger were killed while on a placement in Malaysia. Three months on, their friends and family gathered to celebrate their lives
Photo: Lexie Barton
By Tom Nicholson Editor
You will have heard of Aidan Brunger and Neil Dalton, even if you were never fortunate enough to know them. The two friends were killed after leaving a bar in Kuching, the prime suspect was apprehended within 24 hours, he admitted his guilt, and that was that as far as much of the world’s media was concerned. However, for everyone who knew Aidan and Neil, the grief continues. That’s why roughly a hundred of Neil and Aidan’s friends and family members made the journey to the vast playing fields of Cochrane Park in Heaton in arctic conditions to watch the two medics’ teams play each other in what is hoped will become an annual fixture. Aidan was a regular for the firsts and Neil was the captain of the seconds, so their friends decided to institute an annual friendly match between the two teams who for the last few years have been locked in a power struggle at the top of the Intra Mural leagues. The relationship between the two teams has at times been
spikey, to say the least, but all past gripes were put aside - for the day, at least. After trudging across the turf into a stiff, biting wind, the assembled crowd of players and spectators stood around the centre circle to observe a minute’s silence, followed by a minute’s hearty applause. The match, when it started, was a taut, cagey affair for the opening quarter of an hour. Perhaps the most interesting that happened in the opening exchanges was a wayward defensive header threatened to wipe out a table covered in cakes which had been set up (perhaps unwisely) by the edge of the pitch. The deadlock was broken by the seconds after 17 minutes, when striker Billy Horner shot low across the firsts goalkeeper Tom Watkinson (a late substitute, as the regular firsts ‘keeper had apparently fallen over at a performance of Romeo and Juliet and sprained his knee) who could only push the ball into the path of winger Guy Handley, who tapped the ball home. The score stayed at 1-0 to the seconds until half-time. Over in the firsts’ dug-
out, where Aidan’s shirt hung, flapping in the breeze, the general feeling was that their team was comfortably on top in spite of the opening goal. “We’re just missing that little bit of quality in the final third”, said one. “The lads are giving 110% though”, said another. “It’s a game of two halves”, offered a third. Clichés they may well be, but this assessment turned out to be stunningly accurate. With the half only a couple of minutes old, the ball bobbled about in a tangle of legs in the centre circle, and firsts centre-back Jonathan Old decided that he really ought to take charge of the situation. Throwing his own leg into the melee, he hoisted the ball high into the air downfield and presumably thought that a job well done. However, the ball caught the breeze and sailed forward, bouncing over Andrew Conley in the seconds goal and into the net. Almost immediately afterwards, Adam Duckworth nearly put the firsts 2-1 ahead, but shot straight at Conley after beating his man several times over. The fraught start to the half continued when a header from a corner was
cleared off the seconds’ goalline, and full-back Andrew Fretwell put the firsts 2-1 ahead with a towering back-post header from a corner on 63 minutes. The game opened up at that point, as the seconds pressed forward in search of an equaliser. A thrashed finish past Watkinson at his near post looked to have restored parity, but was ruled out for offside. Nonetheless, half-chances continued to come as the seconds gained the upper hand in midfield and forced errors from the firsts. “Calm it down lads!”, Durkan shrieked at one point, looking rather less than composed himself. The firsts could have scored a couple more on the break late on, but a combination of lackadaisical finishing from Arthur Okwonko and some desperate defending meant the game finished 2-1 to the firsts. Durkan and striker Matt Anderson were presented with a trophy by Paul Brunger, Aidan’s father, before playes and spectators repaired to the Black Bull pub to discuss the events of the match. The spectators were certainly pleased
with what they’d seen. Fifth year medic Claire Henderson said the game was “a lovely way to celebrate Aidan and Neil” and that she hoped it would become “a tradition which will continue for many years”. Bianca Wadham, another fifth year medic, agreed: “It was cold, but there was a lovely atmosphere. They would’ve been really happy with how the day went.” While the medics in the first team dugout might have been taking the piss with their platitudes and clichés, they did inadvertently capture the tone of the day. There was sadness there, of course, and a potent feeling that neither team was quite complete. However, there was also a good-natured, wholesome kind of gladness in the air. Despite the long-running acrimony between the two sides, there were no flying kneelevel challenges, no great uproar over refereeing decisions, no contretemps by the corner flag. It was, at its heart, a very well-attended kickabout in the park. Like they said, it was a game of two halves. For more pictures turn to page 5
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News
Monday 3 November 2014
News Editors: Charlie Dearnley, Antonia Velikova and Kate Dewey Online News Editor: Mark Sleightholm courier.news@ncl.ac.uk | @TheCourier_News
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Rat attack
Giant rats have attacked households in Somerset. A dozen households have been emptied out at a case of an outof-control rat infestation. The infestation got so bad that maintenance staff refused to enter the resident’s home out of fear that they would be attacked. And who would blame them? According to reports, the monstrous rats were two feet long, from head to tail.
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BOXSET BONANZA The various stages of TV addiction, illustrated
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The fluteypiped star comes to the Academy
The mayor of Vendargues, a small town near Montpellier, has issued a complete ban on clown costumes. Official Bruno Giraudo said France wants to “avoid any disruption... by evil clowns”. France has been suffering from a surge in “evil clown attacks” over the past few weeks.
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Triple nipple Jasmine Tridevil, the woman who became a global sensation after she paid £12,000 for an extra breast, said she was “very flattered”. “When my friend told me there was a Halloween costume of me, I didn’t believe her. Then I saw it in a news article,” Jasmine explained. Her appearance has inspired a company to reveal how to replicate Jasmine’s look. The costume uses two pairs of fake boobs, shiny pink fabric, and a glue gun. Originally from Tampa Bay, Florida, Jasmine was initially accused of concocting an elaborate hoax with her unusual plastic surgery choices. She is still denying these allegations and she is hoping for her own reality show soon.
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Internet
Lifestyle Crime
Man’s best friend?
Police in Prattville, Alabama had their jobs made a little easier this week after a helpful tip-off... from a dog. Drug enforcement police officers arrived at the house of Edward Henderson with a warrant to search the place. When Henderson spotted their cars he made a run for it and sprinted into a 25-foot ravine in the woods behind his house, causing officers to temporarily lose sight of him. Luckily for the police, Bo wandered out of the woods and was quickly able to assist the officers with finding his fugitive owner. The Prattville Police Department said: “Bo was rewarded with dog biscuits from our K-9 Sergeant.” Good dog! Yzx
Beatlemania
A 16-year-old trainee hairdresser has been asked to shorten her name in order for it to fit her first card. Named by her Beatles-crazed Dad, Summer Strawberryfields Forever Cole agreed to have her name shortened in order to fit on her card. However unconventional, Summer claims that she would never change her name.“I’m proud of my names and I would never want to change them,” she said, as she added that she is a huge Beatles fan herself.
A great grandma became an unlikely internet celebrity overnight after posting a clip of her telling jokes in her Brummie accent. Marlene Watson – aka Marlene A Black Country Wench – has posted the videos to Facebook. The videos have reached out to more than 100,000 people with shares, likes and page views, reports the Birmingham Mail. Marlene, 68, says that she is very proud of the Black Country and its accent. She has stated that she does not intend to stop making the videos any time soon.
With bear hands
Dutch conservation photographer Peter Vernhoog has taken the selfie trend one step further - he posed for a shot with a real-life great white shark The 59-yearold, a director of the Dutch Shark Society, leaned out of the divers’ cage to capture these spectacular frames off the coast of Guadeloupe, Mexico. Due to the high water temperatures caused by El Nino, Peter only saw four sharks in three days during the dive - meaning he had to be quick on the shutter. “I began taking selfies with all kinds of sharks - mostly for fun. People are not a prey for great white sharks – they feed on fish and marine mammals like seals.”
Editor Tom Nicholson News Editors Charlie Dearnley, Antonia Velikova, Kate Dewey and Mark Sleightholm Comment Editors Victoria Armstrong, Matt Corden and Ruth Davis Culture Editor Kate Bennett Lifestyle Editors Tom Tibble, Annie Lord, Jack Dempsey and Holly Suttle Fashion Editors Amy O’Rourke, Hannah Fitton and Hannah Goldstein Beauty Editors Charlotte Davies, Charlotte Maxwell and Kathy Davidson Arts Editors Becka Crawshaw, Lucy Chenery and Jess Harman Film Editors David Leighton, Rosie Bellini and Lucas Fothergill Music Editors Jamie Shepherd, Dominique Daly and Chris Addison TV Editor Helen Daly, Ellie Mclaren and Rebecca Dooley Gaming Editors Sophie Baines and Ben Tyrer Science Editors Penny Polson, Laura Staniforth and Jack Marley Sports Editors Jonty Mawer, Peter Georgiev, Huezin Lim and Josh Nicholson
Viral granny
Wildlife
Lifestyle
Sharkfie
Tom Woodward
Two black bears were caught sparring on a camera in a video that went viral with over 10,000 views in just 72 hours. Shaky footage captured from inside a car shows the pair seemingly calming down before a second face-off follows as one bear fronts the other after climbing a set of stairs. A tame nuzzling session quickly escalates into a lightningquick exchange of swipes before the dust-up spills into the street.
Ken Thomas
The Courier is printed by: Print and Digital Associates, Fernleigh House, 10 Uttoxeter Road, Derby, Derbyshire, United Kingdom, DE3 0DA. Established in 1948, The Courier is the fully independent student newspaper of the Students’ Union at Newcastle University. The Courier is published weekly during term time, and is free of charge. The design, text, photographs and graphics are copyright of The Courier and its individual contributors. No parts of this newspaper may be reproduced without the prior permission of the Editor. Any views expressed in this newspaper’s comment pieces are those of the individual writing, and not of The Courier, the Students’ Union or Newcastle University.
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Monday 3 November 2014
Haddaway and kite: heat stroke halts kite buggy adventurers By Kotryna Kairyte
To do something that has never been done before and to defeat the Empty Quarter Desert on their own – that was the aim of two Masters students who travelled all the way to Dubai last summer. Chris Edwards and George Wadsworth, two Mechanical Engineering students, decided to cross the desert on their own using kite buggies. Both of them were certain that it
gies and shopping for equipment but also taking care of their physical health. Both of them explained that they like keeping fit in general, but getting closer to the departure their workout hours increased significantly. “The strength training was intended to help us control the kites and the buggies which gets tiring very quickly; we were also advised to work on our cardio as it’s supposed to help you cope with hot environments, so we made sure to run and cycle frequently,” Chris said.
“I’ve done some scary exhilarating
things in my life but never felt close to death until that day” would be one of the biggest adventures of their life. “I was really looking forward to the expedition as a whole: the idea of being out in the isolation of [the] desert would be a stark contrast to life in Newcastle,” Chris said. George spoke of the problems faced when sourcing their mode of transport: “Initially I was relieved I had managed to sort out a last minute buggy, because some parcel company [...] fucked it up.” Getting ready for the expedition included not only looking for kite bug-
However, their expedition quickly took an unexpected turn. The boys admitted that once they landed in Dubai the nerves really started to kick in – by the time they found a quiet place to sit and work out a plan to get out of the city, it was already 1am. They had to sleep on the floor before attempting to walk out of Dubai. “The next day was basically a rat in a maze scenario where the only way out was with a vehicle,” George said. Getting out of the city was just the beginning of their struggles.
Chris explained: “Once out of the city we discovered that virtually everything off the main road was private land, something not shown on our map of the area (there’s no equivalent to Ordnance Survey over there). This meant that we were going to be walking, with the buggies in tow, until the Omani border.” And so they walked with all their luggage and supplies, towing their buggies towards the Omani border which was still days away. “The big hot ball thing in the sky”, as George described the sun there, was making their trip unbearably hard. Stopping only for short breaks, absolutely exhausted because of the sweltering heat and sheltering in whatever shade they found, Chris and George were determined to move forward and start kite buggying soon enough. “The physical and mental stress of what we were trying to do combined with temperatures of 50°C or higher and constant dehydration leads to irritable people - my frustration with a wobbly front wheel meant George was treated to a 5 am performance of me kicking ten shades of sand out of the tires,” Chris told the Courier. The heat only got worse during the expedition and it hit George the most. “Here in the UK you get hot and you take off layers. Out there you have to
keep your layers on; otherwise you lose moisture far too fast. You start to get dizzy, irrational, even delirious. That’s what happened to George: he became dehydrated to the point where, to him, the only sensible way to cool down was to take layers off.” He admitted that the day when George developed heat stroke was probably the worst part of their journey. Once the first signs of dehydration were noticed, the group set up a shelter and tried to rehydrate and nap through the heat of the day. That is when George made a basic mistake. “I basically took my layers off in a futile attempt to keep cool and lost a lot of salt. I’ve done some scary exhilarating things in my life but never felt close to death until that day,” George recalled when asked about the incident. It was an easy decision to call the expedition off at that point. George’s health was the most important thing and they didn’t want to risk it anymore. Chris said: “sitting at the side of the road waiting to be picked up by the police after the ambulance had gone, and feeling like I’d put my mate in that ambulance was the hardest part of the journey.” Even if they didn’t get to start kite buggying, the expedition was a rewarding adventure for both of them. “I learnt George can’t handle the heat, though he
definitely helped me feel better about having to abort the expedition once he knew he wasn’t going to die. Not many
“An expedition capable of being a world first”
people go from nearly dying in the desert to wondering where they can get a burger and chips,” Chris laughed. Finally, they were both happy for attempting to do something that nobody had ever done before. “I’d taken an idea I’d had in February 2013 and turned it into an expedition that was capable of being a world first and breaking a world record,” Chris said. “I think the very fact we got out there and gave it a go was the best bit for me.” George also added that he grew a feeling of: “complete and unreserved respect for the desert and all inhospitable climates.” When asked if they were ever going to do anything like that again, the two friends were very enthusiastic, despite all the difficulties they had to face on their journey. Chris said he was already working on organising the next expedition while George hurried to add: “With a more serious budget and support crew. Probably.”
Images: Chris Edwards and George Wadsworth
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Monday 3 November 2014
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Danish car-share scheme comes to Toon By Mark Sleightholm Online News Editor
ALWAYS PARKED? Rentecarlo works to make money from your unused car. Image: Rentecarlo
Four Danish graduates are bringing their car sharing scheme to the streets of Newcastle. Rentecarlo helps car owners rent out their cars to other members, allowing them to make money back from their otherwise-idle vehicles. Jacob Neilsen, David Harboe, Mads “Anybody and Erik anywhere Mortensen Hasselbalch were incan list their spired to set up the scheme after feeling car on... Rentecarlo.” that public transport was too expensive when they were travelling or visiting friends and family. Rentecarlo provides a cheap and easy mode of transport for those without cars, such as students. The scheme has obvious environmental benefits as well: students who only need a car occasionally can use Rentecarlo instead of adding another car – and more CO2 – to the already congested roads. Having already launched the business in Denmark, the four entrepreneurs set their sights on the rest of Europe. They chose Newcastle as their next location because of its large student population. They launched Rentecarlo UK with the help of the Ignite100 accelerator programme, which offers support to entrepreneurs and is based at Campus North in Newcastle. Neilsen felt this support made a big difference, saying: “Setting up a company in a different country is always more difficult... because you don’t have the same network.” He added: “When you
are a start-up you want to do as many things as possible with as low a budget as possible. It forces start-ups to think creatively.” The team hope to expand the business to London, and ultimately to the whole of Europe. One of the key features of the scheme is its flexibility: anybody anywhere can list their car on the Rentecarlo website. Neilsen says: “It is so super simple and convenient.” In fact, the scheme has proved so popular with Newcastle’s car-less students that demand is outstripping supply. Car owners looking to earn some extra money are invited to register their cars on the Rentecarlo website. Owners can set the rent for their car, and Rentecarlo take care of the insurance and ensure that both owner and renter get a fair deal. Renters must be over 21 and approved by Rentecarlo, and all cars listed on the website must meet road safety and environmental standards, but Rentecarlo aims to attract people who would be turned away by more conventional car sharing schemes, such as young drivers. Rentecarlo’s professional but friendly image goes hand in hand with their environmentally friendly, community orientated project. The more people who register their cars with Rentecarlo, the more useful the service becomes for those wishing to rent a car. Neilsen’s advice for other young entrepreneurs with a business idea is: “Find a few people who have made successful start-ups and take advice from them. Get to know people in the industry and understand the dynamics and pains... Then just get shit done.”
Researchers show link between gait and dementia By Sabina Seksembayeva Parkinson’s has become more predictable as it can now be linked to the way we walk and move. Researchers at Newcastle University have found a definitive link between gait and early changes in cognitive function in people with Parkinson’s disease. The research, published in the Frontiers in Aging Neuroscience journal, could mean that gait may be used as an early warning sign to help to predict the development of cognitive impairment and “This dementia in Parkinresearch son’s. Even though a link between gait disis the turbance and demenbiggest of tia in older adults has already been discovits kind ered, until now the to date” relationship has not been clear in Parkinson’s. Lynn Rochester, Professor of Human Movement Science at Newcastle University said: “The relationship between gait and cognition has never been established this early on and in such a large group of Parkinson’s before. In the future walking patterns may be a useful early warning system to help identify dementia risk in Parkinson’s.” She is also the main author of the groundbreaking paper. Over 120 people with Parkinson’s disease were tested for the research. The
results from their tests were compared to those of over 180 older adults. This makes this research the biggest of its kind to date. Volunteers were asked to walk for two minutes in the lab and their gait pattern was then analyzed. Factors such as the length of stride and the sideways sway were looked at in a specially designed gait laboratory at the Clinical Ageing Research Unit, a clinical research facility jointly managed by Newcastle University and the Newcastle upon Tyne NHS Hospitals Foundation Trust. “Subtle “Subtle changes in changes in someone’s walking for examsomeone’s pattern, ple slowing down of walking steps, and increased from side to pattern... sway side are related to are related cognitive function to cognitive even before changare seen in cogfunction” es nitive tests,” Lynn Rochester added. Professor Rochester also stated that continuing work will show whether it is possible to predict future cognitive changes and risk of dementia. Nonetheless, present findings give: “great promise”. “If we can use this and test people who may at risk, then we could pick up the early signs and begin treatment and advice,” she said.
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news.5
Monday 3 November 2014
Snapshot: the Aidan Brunger and Neil Dalton Memorial Cup
Clockwise from above: the Medics 2s attempt to unlock the 1s’ defence in breezy conditions at Cochrane Park; goalscorer Guy Handley tries to work an opening; friends and family head across the fields for the match; the memorial cup itself; Niall Durkan and Matt Anderson lift the trophy for the 1s; and Aidan’s shirt hangs in the Medics 1s dugout. Photography by Lexie Barton
Campaigners advocate drug law rethink By Charlie Dearnley News Editor
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Students for Sensible Drug Policy, a national campaign started in 2009 has recently been brought to Newcastle. Zoe Carre and a team of students have begun campaigning for the University to end their war on drugs. SSDP is looking towards becoming a charitable organization, not a society, and has received some incredibly positive support and feedback from the University thus far. Carre commented SSDP that, “Campus seneither curity have been exadvocate tremely supportive, as has the Christian nor Chaplain.” condemn SSDP neither the taking advocate nor condemn the taking of drugs of drugs, but alternatively attempt to educate individuals so that they can make an informed and healthy decision for themselves. There is a huge emphasis in their campaign on education. Carre commented on how she has been volunteering at the Lifeline Project, a harm reduction clinic and needle exchange in Newcastle City Centre, for a while now. Witnessing the potential harm that current drug laws can cause inspired Zoe to launch the SSDP campaign in Newcastle. She also reflected upon the student incident last year involving 2CB, in which three students were rushed to hospital, commenting that it “could have been avoided with a more sensible drug policy.” Carre stated that, “SSDP are trying to encourage more open-minded conversation, treating issues case by case”, and recognise that not everyone is the same
and different individuals require different conversation. This conversation will also go towards making the subject “less of a taboo, so that more people will openly talk about drugs, and be less afraid to SSDP ofseek advice or fers support, help. We’re not here to pass advice and judgment.” “advocates Carre also the ability explained how to make an there seemed to informed be some drug related issues decision” she found to be specific to Newcastle. These included “legal highs, ecstasy-related dangers like over heating and dehydration, and mixing excessive alcohol with drugs.” These are just some of the issues that SSDP will attempt to provide help and advice for, with a goal of minimising risk through education. SSDP is soon to begin its Dance Safe campaign, focusing on the dance and club scene of Newcastle. They will be distributing educational packs with leaflets giving advice for a wide variety of drugs, and include phone numbers to call for help at any time of the day. In the future they look towards running a campaign initiated by ‘Release’ in London titled “Nice People Take Drugs”. SSDP will also be holding a number of social events including film screenings and talks. Carre also stated that SSDP offers support, advice and “advocates the ability to make an informed decision” while triving for harm reduction and education, rather than enforcing values and views upon any individuals.
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Monday 3 November 2014
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Medsin to host national conference By Kate Dewey News Editor
CHANGING CITIES: Newcastle hosts this year’s Medsin national conference. Image: Medsin.
This November Newcastle is playing host to Medsin’s annual national conference. The conference, titled ‘Changing Cities: building a healthy future together’ focuses on the implications attached to our expanding cities. The conference is taking place on the 15th and 16th of this month at the Medical School. Newcastle has taught medicine “Tackling since 1834, being the global and only university in the health country to originate as a medical school. inequalThe conference has ity through been arranged by a education” committee made up of 15 members of Newcastle’s Medsin society. Lotte Elton, co-president of the Newcastle branch of Medsin and member of the organising committee, spoke to the Courier: “Medsin UK is a national global health charity run by and for students, tackling global and local health inequality through education, advocacy and community action. “We feed into the International Federation of Medical Student Associations, and Medsin has been represented internationally at meetings of the WHO and the UN, as well as contributing to national and international policy.” Newcastle’s Medsin is one of 30 branches of the society in the UK. The ‘Changing Cities’ is the national conference and in the spring, Medsin’s Global
Health conference takes place. “During the weekend there’ll be debates, talks and discussions exploring what a city is, how our health is inextricably linked to the city, and how our cities are changing,” said Lotte. Participants will engage with: “forward-thinking ideas that cities have come up with to improve the urban environment and the health of its inhabitants”. The event will cover a variety of topical issues during workshops such as homelessness, ethical procurement for health (debating the ethics surrounding the sources of medical supplies), climate change, and mental health. The committee has organised for professionals in the fields being covered to speak, ranging from an urban design researcher to a student climate change activist. One of the speakers will be David Satterthwaite, a Senior Fellow for the International Institute for Environment and Development (IIED) and the editor of Environment and Urbanization. His work focuses on reducing poverty in Africa, Asia and Latin America and he is also interested in the effects of climate change on the urban population. He has been heavily involved in the Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change (IPCC) and was part of the team that was awarded the Nobel Peace Prize in 2007. Medsin are anticipating a crowd of 250 people, already having sold 200 tickets. The £35 tickets include food and social events. Lotte stresses that Medsin and the conference are available to anyone.
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Monday 3 November 2014
Stu Brew hops onto beer scene By Sima Nikolaeva
Newcastle University’s first studentrun brewery is about to start producing quality real ales in the heart of Newcastle University campus. Stu Brew enterprise was one of SCAN’s projects which was awarded a grant last year as part of the Student Green Fund (SGF). Student Brewing Society (BrewSoc), formed to run the Stu Brew enterprise, dedicated the whole “The response of last year to setting up the brewery and we’ve seen has been in- was only ratified in credible – we April. There will also had received be seminars held and three orders guest lecturers invited for November” over the year to share some theoretical and practical knowledge with the society members. With the brewery site having been finalized in Merz Court in May and the brewery itself installed in August, Stu Brew is now in the home stretch of the official launch while still waiting for the beer duty license to be granted by HMRC in mid-November. A joint project of NUSU and School of Chemical Engineering and Advanced Materials, the brewery appears to be “not just an enterprise, but also a research lab, aimed to elaborate sustainable brewing systems that other breweries can then adopt“, explains Zelda, MSc Synthetic Biology, Co-President
of Brewing Society. There are currently two projects running, within which Dr Chris O’Malley – brew master and principle investigator – does research for BrewDog Bar about brewing process optimization. “Taking into account that brewing is inherently a very unsustainable process, which produces a lot of waste, our pivotal concern is to try to research all of those areas and try to minimise the impact brewing produces on our environment”, argues Anawat, MSc Strategic Planning and Investment, Co-President of the society. In the very beginning beer will be sold predominantly through Mens Bar, but, as the society continues to expand partnerships across the University, they endorse everyone interested to get in touch and collaborate with them. “The response we’ve seen has been incredible – we had received three orders for November, which we, unfortunately, then had to turn down because of our licensing issues“, says Anawat. By now the enterprise has already got several orders for Societies’ and courses’ Christmas parties, too, and is happy to assist at any other occasions. “What we really strive for is to make students realize more about the delicate flavors that you could have in these different types of beers and encourage responsible drinking for the taste, flavor and aroma as opposed to drinking for the sole purpose of getting drunk“, Anawat and Zelda claim.
ALES OF GLORY: The brewery site in Merz Court. Image: Stu Brew
Young Greens: A new vehicle for change
YOUNG GREENS: The society’s advert campaign. Image: Robert Magowan
By Ben Leach Newcastle University now has its very own representation of the Green Party in the form of a new society, Young Greens. According to society founder and president, Robert Magowan: “Young Greens is all about a fairer, more sustainable society.” He wanted to set up Young Greens as, “students are great at knowing what’s right and wrong,” and so the new society provides a platform for students to engage in political change. Students also considering forming their own society should be encouraged by Robert’s experience: “There appeared
to be quite a bit of admin to go through but Amy Macauley (the Activities Officer) was great in helping us through it.” Young Greens will provide a forum for political discussion but will “Students also be politically active within the are great University, chamat knowing pioning the Fossil campaign what’s right Free which, at Glasand wrong” gow University, stopped £18m of investments going into the fossil fuel industry and redirected it into renewable energy projects. But Robert’s also quick to make clear
that Young Greens are not a single-issue society – a criticism often put to the Green Party. Greens are also focussed on achieving a living wage and have progressive drugs legislation policies. Young Greens will also be actively campaigning to reduce the wage gap between the University’s highest and lowest paid staff, as part of the Fair Pay Campus campaign. At the moment, the ratio is about 18:1; the aim is to reduce that to 10:1. Robert also argues that the Greens offer a much greater change to the establishmentarianism of the other main political parties. Robert emphasises: “It [the Green Party] is not an establishment party. UKIP can claim what they
want, but their leaders and donors are public-schooled City old boys.” Despite this, the Greens continue to struggle to “We’ve got make political and put strength in gains any meaningful pressure on numbers the three big and we’re political parties. UKIP’s leader, getting as Nigel Farage, many people whose party has recently as possible only gained its first MP, has been ininvolved vited to particiactively” pate in the tel-
evision debates leading up to next year’s general election – something that the Greens feel they should also be part of. But Robert believes Young Greens can make a difference: “we’re running jointly with the new Young Greens Society at Northumbria so we’ve got strength in numbers and we’re getting as many people as possible involved actively.” Young Greens will meet on Wednesdays at 5pm in The Hancock (near the Robinson Library) and should email Robert Magowan (r.j.magowan@ncl. ac.uk) for details. Students can also find Young Greens on the NUSU societies website, you can sign up for £5, and then be emailed with more information.
Monday 3 November 2014
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NEWSTACK
Nationwide marking boycott begins
Job  Title:  After  School  Club  Facilitator  –  Reading  for  Pleasure  Employer:  Bookhappy Closing  Date:  30/11/14 Salary:  £10  per  hour Basic  job  description:  To  facilitate  after-Âschool  clubs  in  Tyne  and  Wear  and  Northumberland  for  children  of  all  primary  school  ages.  Each  club  will  include  up  to  20  children  across  a  range  of  up  to  \HDU JURXSV ,Q WKH Âż UVW LQVWDQFH ZH DQWLFLSDWH that  the  successful  candidate  will  work  2  hours  per  week,  from  3-Â5pm  and  that  this  will  increase  as  we  take  on  more  after-Âschool  clubs  and  other  projects. Person  Requirements:  The  successful  applicant  should  be  an  under-Âgraduate  or  graduate  with  VLJQLÂż FDQW H[SHULHQFH RI ZRUNLQJ ZLWK FKLOGUHQ of  ages  5-Â11  years  old,  preferably  in  a  school  setting.  Location:  Primary  schools  within  Tyne  and  Wear  and  Northumberland Job  Title:  Care  Assistant  Employer:  Direct  Healthcare Closing  Date:  31/12/14 Salary:  Competitive  £6.50  -  £9.00  per  hour Basic  job  description:  Direct  Healthcare  XUJHQWO\ UHTXLUHV H[SHULHQFHG &DUH $VVLVWDQWV to  work  in  a  wide  range  of  community-Âbased  environments  in  Tyne  &  Wear.  This  includes  both  short  and  long-Âterm  contracts  as  well  as  ad  hoc  shifts.  You  can  be  offered  varied  shifts  that  are  DLPHG WR EH Ă€ H[LEOH DURXQG RWKHU FRPPLWPHQWV you  have  such  as  childcare  or  part  time  jobs,  KRZHYHU \RX ZLOO QRUPDOO\ EH H[SHFWHG WR FRPPLW to  a  minimum  of  1  shift  per  week. Person  Requirements:  ([FHOOHQW FRPPXQLFD WLRQ VNLOOV D PLQLPXP RI PRQWKV H[SHULHQFH LQ a  formal  care  setting  within  the  last  4  years  and  eligibility  to  work  in  the  UK. Location:  Newcastle  upon  Tyne   Job  Title:  1HZFDVWOH :RUN ([SHULHQFH Âą %XVL QHVV 'HYHORSPHQW DQG 0DUNHWLQJ 2IÂż FHU Employer:  Papillon  Translations  Closing  Date:  09/11/2014 Salary:  £700  Bursary  Basic  job  description:  Papillon  is  a  secure  and  trusted  translation  company  employing  highly  technical  specialist  translators.  We  offer  transcrip- tion  and  interpretation  services  in  150  languages  and  using  translation  software.  Papillon  is  looking  for  an  individual  to  develop  and  implement  a  marketing  strategy  for  the  business.  Person  Requirements:  You  must  have  a  strong  marketing  skills  with  an  interest  in  business  GHYHORSPHQW ([FHOOHQW FRPPXQLFDWLRQ VNLOOV DUH essential  along  with  problem  solving  and  strategic  SODQQLQJ H[SHULHQFH Location:  Working  from  home  with  regular  meet- ings  in  Newcastle. Job  Title:  Front  of  House  Team  Member  Employer:  Wagamama  (Gateshead  Metrocentre)   Closing  Date:  12/11/2014 Salary:  Competitive  Basic  job  description:  Being  a  Wagamama  front  of  house  team  member  means  being  the  person  who  brings  our  restaurant  to  life.  It  means  being  on  the  move  in  a  busy  environment,  making  every  customer  feel  welcome.  Being  the  one  who  tells  WKH :DJDPDPD VWRU\ H[SODLQV RXU MDSDQHVH inspired  menu  and  helps  to  make  every  customer  feel  welcome.  We’re  looking  for  people  who  love  being  part  of  a  fast-Âmoving  team.  Person  Requirements:  Team  work  is  key  to  eve- ry  position  in  Wagamama,  so  it’s  important  that  you  can  communicate  well  and  are  able  to  keep  cool  under  pressure,  because  our  restaurants  get  very  busy!  Many  of  our  restaurant  managers  started  their  careers  with  Wagamama  as  a  team  member,  so  you  must  be  enthusiastic  and  have  passion  for  customer  service. Location:  Gateshead  Job  Title:  Holiday  Sales  Advisor  Employer:  Parkdean  Holidays Closing  Date:  30/11/2014 Salary:  £6.50  -  £7.00  per  hour  Basic  job  description:  We  are  looking  for  pas- VLRQDWH VDOHV SHRSOH ZKR DUH DEOH WR H[SUHVV WKHLU H[FLWHPHQW IRU KROLGD\V RYHU WKH WHOHSKRQH You  will  be  responsible  for  dealing  with  customer  enquiries  from  a  wide  range  of  different  channels,  including  inbound/outbound  calls  and  email  en- quiries,  selling  holidays  at  our  24  award  winning  holiday  parks  around  the  UK. Person  Requirements:  Every  call  is  different,  so  you  will  need  to  be  able  to  adapt  to  different  customer  needs.  You  will  need  to  have  great  questioning  and  listening  skills  in  order  to  select Â
DQG FRQÂż GHQWO\ VHOO RXU SURGXFWV XVLQJ IHDWXUHV DQG EHQHÂż WV WR PD[LPL]H UHYHQXH RQ DOO FDOOV You  must  be  naturally  sales  focused  and  aspire  to  deliver  results  in  order  to  meet  conversion  and  call  quality  targets. Location:  Gosforth  Business  Park  Job  Title:  Nespresso  Brand  Ambassador  Employer: ,' 6WDIÂż QJ Closing  Date:  20/12/2014 Salary:  £10  per  hour  plus  commission  Basic  job  description:  We’re  currently  hiring  a  Sales  Professional  to  represent  a  premium  Coffee  machine  brand  within  Newcastle,  in  the  John  Lewis  store.  If  you’re  successful  in  this  op- portunity  you  will  receive  consistent  work,  great  day  rates  plus  an  uncapped  commission!  The  successful  candidate  will  pro-Âactively  interact  with  customers  and  educate  them  on  the  key  features  of  the  brand’s  portfolio  of  products. Person  Requirements:  Well  groomed,  proven  FXVWRPHU VHUYLFH H[SHULHQFH UHWDLO HQYLURQPHQW H[SHULHQFH DQG D IULHQGO\ DSSURDFKDEOH PDQQHU  Location:  Newcastle  upon  Tyne  Job  Title:  1HZFDVWOH :RUN ([SHULHQFH Âą :HE Designer  Employer:  Multichem  Ltd Closing  Date:  09/11/2014 Salary:  £700  Bursary  Basic  job  description:  Multichem  is  a  UK  ink  PDQXIDFWXUHU EDVHG LQ +H[KDP ZLWK D VHFRQG manufacturing  facility  in  Shanghai.  Considered  WKH OHDGHU LQ WKH Âż HOG RI ZKLWHERDUG LQNV 0XOWL FKHP H[SRUWV RI LWV SURGXFWV WR FRXQWULHV The  placement  will  involve  a  complete  redesign  RI WKH H[LVWLQJ ZHE VLWH ZZZ PXOWLFKHP QHW DQG delivery  of  a  fresh,  modern  and  international  site  with  improved  navigation  and  reinforcement  of  the  company’s  branding. Person  Requirements:  Previous  website  design  DQG FUHDWLYH Ă€ DLU LV HVVHQWLDO Location:  +H[KDP PLQXWH ZDON IURP WKH WUDLQ station. Job  Title:  Replenishment  Assistant  Employer:  World  Duty  Free  Closing  Date:  10/11/2014 Salary:  £6.50  per  hour  Basic  job  description:  As  a  Replenishment  Assistant  you  will  hold  a  pivotal  position  within  the  team.  We  pride  ourselves  on  our  reputation  for  creating  outstanding  displays  that  stop  custom- ers  in  their  tracks  and  for  this  we  need  dedicated  team  members  to  maintain  this  prestige.  You  will  be  working  across  all  of  our  fantastic  departments  and  will  be  collecting  deliveries,  storing  products,  pricing  and  displaying  stock.  It  is  heavy  duty  work  but  you  will  be  part  of  an  energetic  enthusiastic  team  who  are  passionate  about  what  they  do. Person  Requirements:  Retail/Customer  Service  H[SHULHQFH LV HVVHQWLDO Location:  Newcastle  Airport  Job  Title:  1HZFDVWOH :RUN ([SHULHQFH Âą Flying  Solo 0DJD]LQH (GLWRU Employer:  Newcastle  University  Closing  Date:  09/11/2014 Salary:  £700  Bursary  Basic  job  description:  For  the  past  two  years,  the  School  of  Modern  Languages  (SML)  has  SURGXFHG D \HDUO\ PXOWLOLQJXDO PDJD]LQH FDOOHG Flying  Solo.  Flying  Solo  is  entirely  devoted  to  the  VWXGHQW H[SHULHQFH GXULQJ WKH <HDU $EURDG DQG is  entirely  written  by  SML  students.   We  want  to  continue  growing  and  need  a  student  editor  to  KHOS SUHSDUH WKH QH[W LVVXH WKDW ZLOO EH RXW LQ 0D\ 2015.  The  successful  candidate  will  liaise  with  SML  students  who  are  currently  on  their  Year  Abroad  to  select  contributors  and  organise  the  production  of  articles  and  accompanying  pictures. Person  Requirements:  The  candidate  should  have  working  knowledge  of  at  least  one  of  the  following  languages:  Spanish  /  French  /  German  /  Japanese  /  Chinese.  Ideally  the  candidate  should  be  a  SML  student  who  has  spent  a  Year  Abroad  as  part  of  his/her  studies  and  who  already  knows  some  of  the  SML  members  of  staff  and  students.  The  candidate  must  demonstrate  good  communi- cation  and  organisational  skills  and  his/her  ability  to  work  effectively  both  independently  and  as  part  of  a  team. Location:  Newcastle  University  Campus Â
This week a marking boycott will affect hundreds of higher education students across the UK. According to the University and College Union, members in 69 universities, including Newcastle, will begin an assessment boycott on 6th November. Last week, the UCU and the employers’ representatives met to negotiate a guarantee to protect the pensions of members of the Universities Superannuation Scheme (USS). When those talks failed, the union announced plans to take action, and said further negotiations were necessary. Thursday’s assessment boycott will stop students being set coursework or receiving formal marks and feedback. It will also put exams on hold. According to the UCU, employers’ current proposals would mean scheme members would lose thousands of pounds in retirement. Universities UK wants to end the final salary element of the scheme for about 150,000 active USS members and move them to a career average scheme. The next negotiating meeting is scheduled for 7th November.
Cranfield Uni flies high with airliner
British Airways has donated a Boeing B737-400 airliner to Cranfield University. The university plans to use the retired plane as a research and teaching facility for students on its Masters and Executive courses. Professor Phil John, Pro-ViceChancellor of the School of Aerospace, Transport and Manufacturing, said of the new arrival: “We are delighted that British Airways has decided to donate this large 400 series aeroplane to us and we greatly appreciate the relationship we have with this major airline.� The pro-vice-chancellor also says the Boeing will provide the university a unique and “highly significant resource,� while further enhancing the university’s industrial scale facilities. British Airways Captain Marc Schavemaker said: “With more modern and efficient aircraft coming into our fleet it’s great that we have the opportunity to donate this retired 737 for research and training purposes.�
Prostate cancer catwalk collaboration A Manchester-based scientist has teamed up with a Pennsylvanian fashion designer for a catwalk creation that shows how prostate cancer spreads. The dress is based on Dr Esther Baena’s work. Dr Baena is a junior group leader conducting scientific studies at the Cancer Research UK Manchester Institute, based at The University of Manchester. The design depicts the tumour transformation process. Dr Baena’s studies focus on prostate cancer, which is the second most diagnosed cancer among men. Dr Baena said: “ I hope it has got people who wouldn’t normally think about science or cancer research talking about this important subject. We made the cell shapes look increasingly rough to show tumour progression and used stronger staining to differentiate between normal and cancerous cells.� The garment will now go on a world tour to promote science globally.
Lancaster renews Santander partnership
Images: James Simpson, Arpingstone, Stephen Richards, Ian Taylor
Santander Universities Global Division’s agreement renewal with Lancaster University means students and staff will benefit from scholarships and awards worth ÂŁ115,000. The agreement provides Lancaster University students and staff with many benefits and opportunities including study abroad trips. The partnership has provided Lancaster University with ÂŁ168,000 of financial support since the relationship was established three years ago.The agreement aims to encourage students from the University’s partner, the Federal University of Lavras in Brazil, to join Masters programmes offered by Lancaster Environment Centre. It also aims to help Lancaster students and staff to study in the UK and abroad. Simon Bray, Director of Santander Universities UK, said: “With the renewal of this agreement we not only confirm, but also increase our commitment with the University for a further three years.â€? Antonia Velikova News Editor
The Courier
.9
Monday 3 November 2014
Comment
thecourieronline.co.uk/comment
Comment Editors: Victoria Armstrong & Matt Corden Online Comment Editor: Ruth Davis courier.comment@ncl.ac.uk | @Courier_Comment
Hack attack: uni vs. the press Jade Holroyd
S
tudent journalism has been a key tenet of universities for many years, with many universities now holders of their own official student-run newspapers. Such publications provide students with the opportunity to discuss around about anything they feel relevant to student life, and it is this freedom which has generated the debate as to whether or not restrictions should be placed on what can be said in regards to the universities themselves. In recent years there have been cases in which both universities and students’ unions have taken measures to stop unfavourable stories about their institutions from being published. The most extreme cases have involved students having to face threat of dismissal for writing articles which have been deemed detrimental to their universities. The said articles simply criticised the decision of their university’s regarding possible budget cuts, and under no circumstances should such drastic measures have been taken. University newspapers are run by their students and therefore writers should be permitted to report on issues that students have the right to know about, be it positive or negative, especially when it comes to issues related to the university they are paying to attend. Generally students care about the institutions that they are a part of, therefore the likelihood that they will continuously produce work which denotes their university negatively is very low: firstly, because they don’t feel inclined to, and secondly, because they simply have better things to discuss. Yes, writers are bound to speak out about student grievances and occasionally cover stories which openly criticise the university, but they are also prone to feature achievements and progressions of
What others think... “In my opinion student journalism is overly accessible, increasingly dumbed down and achieves little other than C.V building for failed journos of the future.”
Joe Tetlow
the university in much greater detail. So often the positives are overshadowed by the negatives, and this needs to be recognised. Most university newspapers hold themselves to be encouragers of high-quality work alike any mainstream paper and it would be an abomination to prevent them from doing so because an institution prioritises their reputation. Censorship reduces both legitimacy and creativity, and it is the
duty of student writers to inform people about what’s going on around campus, not withhold information. Unfortunately censorship continues to occur across student publications and with most institutions the main source of funding for them, this comes as no surprise. The priority of student journalists should be to provide full coverage to readers; of course this should be done with caution, however never to the point of removal or fal-
“Writers should be permitted to report on issues that students have the right to know about”
sification of information. Student journalism has always had an impact on university life, however, and never more so than today. Technology provides a platform on which publications can be viewed on numerous levels twenty-four hours a day, seven days a week. With this said, such discussion holds enormous relevance for current journalists; with increased readership comes responsibility, and with responsibility comes concern on the part of the university. Whether or not the growing impact of student journalism will increase the prospect of censorship is unknown, for the sake of both the writers and the readers, I certainly hope that this is not the case. Universities have a history of being liberal and promoting discussion regarding all things political, social, economic, so on and so forth. To forget these proud traditions seems unwise. Consider as well: journalism is a tricky business to break into especially when you’re fresh out of uni. So for aspiring journalists like myself, student journalism is a great way to gain experience as well getting your ideas heard across campus. It’s not uncommon to see almost every other student on campus with the Courier in hand and I firmly believe that this will continue, so long as the fundamental right of free speech is upheld so that students may have the right to voice their own opinions, no matter what.
“Student journalism is integral to how students are represented, it is vital that students have a platform to report issues relating to university life but the temptation to portray students in a biased way such as assumimg all students are big drinkers, should be avoided”
Lucy Morgan
“It’s easy to dismiss student journalism as being irrelevant and largely pointless, but I that’s not very fair. Yes, it’s true that there is some terrible student journalcc ism out there, but equally there are some terrible professional journalists around, and they actually do it for a living.”
Jake Harrison
“But no one ever reads student papers!” voices holler. Even if it’s true, I read it, and seeing students represented as sex-crazed, alcohol-soaked animals makes cc me reel. If not proper representation, university papers need at least to be wary of not turning their readership away.
Antonia Velikova
Dear Michael Fallon: shut the hell up
An open letter to the defence secretary from a very peeved and very much legal immigrant
Antonia Velikova
J
ust last weekend, defence secretary Michael Fallon claimed that British towns are being “swamped” by immigrants and their residents are “under siege [with] large numbers of migrant workers and people claiming benefits”. Dear Mr. Fallon. Take this as an open letter from a (very much legal) immigrant in this country, in your country. Please check your metaphors and, actually, consider whether you would want to use them ever again. In fact, reconsider speaking on immigration ever again, if at all possible.
We’re not treacherous muddy waters that grapple at your feet and drag you under layers and layers upon filth until you suffocate. Neither are we the new-age plague or Wermacht, we won’t make your “ordinary British working people” lie around in trenches as we throw our benefits request forms and loan applications at them. I can promise you, hand on heart, this won’t happen. What will in fact happen, Mr. Fallon, is that by using mixed metaphors, you will turn away many capable people who can do nothing but benefit your economy. Many young people, willing to fight for the right of a good life in a country that’s not their own, many laymen, willing to work every single menial job that your “ordinary British” society considers degrading. I can speak for myself that when I came to this country one year ago, I was
already anxious and petrified enough by Mr. Farage and his lot, who made me all believe that no one wanted me here. The fact that the Tories are now trying to win votes over by adapting the Ukipmindset because they saw that Farage is gaining on votes is petty, if nothing else. Opinion polls might be a good reason to turn your political agenda upside down but not like this. Not like a desperate cry for help – look at us, we can help with that stuff, too. Of course, Mr. Fallon has now backpedalled and apologised for his claims. I expected the apology and it neither surprises me nor makes me feel better about the situation. Naturally, I can only present the immigration issue the way I see it, as an immigrant in the UK. People certainly do have a problem with it – I have been asked about my
plans for the future several times and, whether it’s just in my head or not, there is a sense of trepidation in that sentence. Is it really there? Is it just my expectations because of the immigration discourse that politicians seem to be adapting more? Or is it a genuine fear among British people – “ordinary British people” – who absorb that seemingly innocent language, the war metaphors, and the “stranger danger” theory? I don’t know. Language is fickle and dangerous and people in the public sphere, politicians especially, need to be wary of how they use it. Words do unseen damage to society’s values and public opinions. Besides, sorry, Mr. Fallon. The role of the scaremonger has been taken.
10.comment
SOAP BOX
Monday 3 November 2014
The Courier
It’s free education, stupid
Fees aren’t just unfair, they’re downright discriminatory against women - but where’s the rage?
WOMEN’S PAY Earlier in the week, I read of a BBC investigation into prize money in sport, showing that men receive an average of 30% more than women. One glance at the statistics shows that this percentage is mostly influenced by football. The common argument, also ironically in the media, has been – ‘Why do male footballers get so much more than their female counterparts’? The answer is simply capitalism; not ‘feminism’ or ‘discrimination’, words vomited out from the sickness of distortion. Bankers get more than cleaners. Yes they may actually work as hard as each other and sometimes even in the same field, but the market dictates what is most valuable and thus most rewarded. Footballers receive a percentage of their industry, a multi-billion pound entertainment one, whereas women receive approximately the same percentage of theirs. To propose an equalising of pay for Kelly Smith and that charming bloke John Terry seems a hell of an idea on the face of it, but what you’re actually advocating is communism, so think again. Joe Tetlow
FAMOUS TWEETS My personal favourite procrastination destination at current is the weird and wonderful world of celebrity twitter accounts. There are two especial beacons of comedy I wish to commend: James Blunt and Cher. You may be familiar with Mr Blunt as a purveyor of clichéd love songs but I suspect you were unaware that his twitter feed tends to feature golden nuggets such as “If I was in a band, it would be called Limp Willy and the Disappointments”. Additionally, in response to some gal calling him her ‘guilty pleasure’, he responded with “mine’s anal”. Funny, even if only because it’s unexpected and it’s in such stark contrast to his music. As for Ms. Cher, well… where to begin. She describes her tweets as a product of passion and dyslexia, and have resulted in the mystifying likes of: “Going dentist.EVERYONE SHOULD BOYCOTT WALL MART ! They R BIGGEST SELLER OF GUNS IN U.S ! Pick Up Milk,Pick Up BULLETS.” Fabulously bizarre. Their handles are @JamesBlunt and @ Cher – go and explore my lucky children. Victoria Armstrong
RUSSELL BRAND Is there anything more boring and tedious than a Hollywood actor turned revolutionary? Well in 1970, the journalist Tom Wolfe coined the term “radical chic,” a word to describe frivolous revolutionary cliché spouted by celebrities in the interests of fashion and image. This is Russell Brand in a nutshell. I have nothing against radical politics in itself, some of my heroes are more than deserving of the “revolutionary” label- from Vaclav Havel to George Orwell - but the drivel of Russell Brand’s new “Revolution” doesn’t come close. I haven’t read his book (where he self-congratulates by portraying himself as Che Guevara on the cover), but anyone can get a good idea of what he’s about just from the sheer amount of airtime he receives. Leaving aside the fact he thinks it’s possible that George Bush was responsible for 9/11 and that democracy is a waste of time; Russell Brand has very little to say but takes a long time saying it. Everything he hates about the capitalist class is so sinister that he feels like he isn’t obliged to offer an explanation as to why, or an alternative for that matter. The narcissism behind all this should never have been taken seriously. Matt Corden
Image: Allan Ajifo @ Flickr Image: Francisco Osorio @ Flickr
Lucy Morgan
O
n the 29th October, a group of student activists occupied the headquarters of Universities UK in order to present the management with a ‘Degree in bullshit: First Class Honours - Privatisation’. They were protesting about the ridiculous tuition fees thrust upon students in 2012 and cuts being made to education resources. Student fees are generally unpopular, unless you are extremely lucky or rich and are able to pay the money up front. Most students rely on getting a
“Like most political injustices, fees hit some harder than others”
student loan and/or overdraft to enable them to actually live while they are at university. There seems to be a cognitive dissonance surrounding these loans, we forget that one day we have to pay it back and that we are surviving off tax payers money. In almost any situation, there is a creeping temptation to let political issues slide to the back of our minds in order to make room for more important
Laura Marsh
things: endless episodes of south park, getting drunk literally every night, getting more pasta etc. Anything to distract us from the current political injustice we are experiencing. Like most political injustices, the student fees hit some harder than others. The enormous class privilege of expecting young people to cough up £9000 a year in order to achieve a qualification that most employers state as a requirement, sends out a demeaning message. This not only proliferates issues of class but also alienates potential students coming from working/middle class backgrounds. In short, it is the upper classes who benefit from student fees. If you have the financial support to pay back your student loan after you graduate then it is almost a luxury to get a degree rather than a necessity. Although women (as are all genders) are legally entitled to higher education in Britain and indeed make up a higher percentage of the student population, the existence of student fees only exacerbates the financial inequality of the genders. Women will accumulate larger sums of debt over their lifetime due to the fact that women earn thousands less than men when they graduate. As women must pay their debt off over a longer period of time, there will obviously be a greater cost in interest. It makes me wonder then, why the student protests that took place last week were largely only attended by London students. Granted, there will
always be a few from the North East showing their support, however this is an issue of free education; this effects us all and the response has been somewhat apathetic. Apathetic when it should have been manic - whatever happened to students being the forefront of any political change?
“We should use our free speech to reclaim our right to free education”
We are confusing being comfortable with equality. We have the right to free speech and the right to vote so on the surface we are not suffering any injustice - we can happily treat ourselves to a Dominoes and turn the heating up while feeling no impending sense of doom from the considerable burden of debt growing on our shoulders. Others don’t have that luxury: in Hong Kong students are protesting against Beijing’s decision to rule out fully democratic elections and being tear gassed for it. We are among the privileged who are entitled free speech and we should use it to reclaim our right to free education. For information on how to get involved with the National Campaign Against Fees and Cuts go to www.anticuts.com
The name of the marking boycott game
The Courier
comment.11
Monday 3 November 2014
War is over, if you want it Britain’s legacy on the frontline in Afghanistan is one we can be proud of
Matt Corden
I
n a letter to the American people in 1998, the great Afghan anti-Taliban leader Ahmed Shah Massoud – a founding father of the Northern Alliance – said of Afghans that it is their life-long duty to “defend humanity against the scourge of intolerance, violence and fanaticism.” In his address to the European Union, he confirmed Afghanistan’s commitment to a Kabul-based federal democracy. Now the last remaining British troops have left Camp Bastion, they can be proud of what they contributed in the fight for Ahmed Massoud’s radical vision for Afghanistan. Since 2004, three free elections have occurred within a constitutional framework. The Taliban haven’t been completely defeated, yet they haven’t been victorious either. They remain excluded from major towns and cities with real significance. For many in Kabul, it’s difficult to see how the Taliban will return to power in any meaningful sense. Whilst this was never a war of economics, it’s no accident that the GDP per capita in Afghanistan has drastically increased after the facilitation of modernisation through education and gender equality. The beginnings of a free press are also emerging. The instability brought about by insurgency, warlords and corruption are still real problems, but who’s going to say they’d rather Afghani-
stan have remained the property of the Taliban, continuing as the main exporter of international Bin Ladenism? History will judge Tony Blair positively for providing long over-due support to the Taliban’s enemies. Those who advocated neutrality and indifference will have a lot of explaining to do. In October 2001, the anti-war protesters in London shouted the slogan “stop the war before it begins.” They ignored the fact that war had very much began already. When the Taliban seized control of most Afghan territory, a family of Yemeni
“History will judge Tony Blair positively for providing long overdue support to the Taliban’s enemies”
billionaires – with Osama Bin Laden at the forefront – began running a network of global Jihad from the comfort of Taliban hospitality. From the bombing of the US embassies in Nairobi in 1998, to the bombing of the USS Cole in 2000 and finally to the tragic events of 11 September, 2001, they had actively declared war on the United States. War on India had been declared since the Taliban was largely a creation of the Pakistani secret police, who saw the Afghan jihadists as an easy proxy for strategic depth in the fight over Kashmir, culminating in the Indo-Pakistani war of 1999. India
had been aiding the Northern Alliance rebel army well before any NATO soldier entered the Country. Civil war within Afghanistan itself peaked with the genocide of the Hazara people in their native province of Hazarajat, who are Shia by confession (a sect of Islam that is considered heretical by Taliban tribesmen and worthy of death). Furthermore in March 2001, the Taliban blew up the 1500 year-old Buddhas of Bamiyan, which had been declared by UNESCO as a world heritage site and the property of humanity as a whole. British participation within NATO against this global menace was a mere intervention in an ongoing war, not the beginning of a war. Notice how pacifist propaganda usually boils down to the claim that one side is just as bad as the other, and that a moral equivalence exists between the Taliban and NATO. It can take a slightly different form; they assure their audience that they find the force in question morally apprehensible, before unapologetically advocating non-resistance to it. This is perhaps moral cowardice at its ugliest. The pseudo anti-imperialism that comes along with it has absolutely nothing to say about the Bin Ladenist ideology of the global Islamic empire. The attitude that judges there to be “more pressing needs at home” relies on the nationalist desire for a cosy life, without having to worry about the outside world. All these viewpoints should be treated with suspicion. While the war is by no means over for the Afghans, what the British contributed to their struggle - despite the errors and failings - was a noble endeavour. Image: isafmedia @ Flickr
No sporting chance
The
Voice of
Wisdom W
ell, it’s post-Halloween now and term is well under way – no escape, no release. We third years are ever more bogged down in the never ending sludge of work from which is there no release – 60 hour weeks couldn’t even begin to fall that tree. I note as well the academics are ever-sympathetic to our plight, what with the University & College Union (UCU) voting to have yet another marking boycott this week…. I can’t quite remember what that was to do with but then again it doesn’t really matter. It seems to be very much the done thing nowadays to strike or boycott to show one’s unhappiness. Father considers action like this an entirely ridiculous endeavour of course, since students themselves do not make the decisions that the complaints regard, but since when was that the point?
“It seems very much the done thing nowadays to strike or boycott to show one’s unhappiness”
Our sympathies should lie with our dear teachers; our liberal brothers in arms. I mean, was anyone truly irritated by the strikes last Easter? Philosophy does not have especially long contact hours, so I wasn’t actually affected myself, but would I have complained about the extra time off ? No, because I’m not a twat. Plus, everyone knows the devil is in the detail of extra reading; lectures are for those who fail to grasp the more… fundamental points. Nonetheless, that does not stop Father ranting on – “£9000 for you to do nothing! If dear old Maggie was still in office, she’d be having none of this!” No appreciation whatsoever for the fact that the British people, as the High School Musical song goes, are all in this together. No understanding of the fact that making lecturers happy, will be for societal benefit at large. He is a relic from an age gone by. Really he is more to be pitied than laughed at.
“First year is the time for some outrageous 6KHI¿ HOG 8QLWHG¶V VXSSRUW RI &KHG (YDQV DQG 2VFDU 3LVWRULXV¶ OLJKW partying, not for sitting sentence shows justice for women is continually being sidelined in the library like a prick” Just as alarmingly, one woman under the pseudo- tution, and the rest is to be served in the comfort
Alexandra Lyon
F
or several weeks now, it has been debated as to whether or not Ched Evans, footballer for Sheffield United, should be able to return to his previous position with the team. After serving half of his five-year sentence, which began in 2012, Evans has been released from prison. The question is, where does that leave his career? Many have expressed their disgust at the fact that rumours of his re-signing to the club are now circulating. His own aunt, Nina Evans, has according to the Daily Mirror “urged her disgraced nephew to apologise to the girl, and criticised him for showing no remorse.” Given the fact that an estimated 75-95% of rape cases go unreported in the UK according to a 2007 government report on rape statistics, it is surprising that a conviction was given; Evans’ status in the sporting arena would make such a verdict all the more unlikely. So despite his consistent pleas of innocence, it is fairly safe to assume that the jury were justified in their decision to imprison him. It is completely reasonable for the public to be against his return to professional football. Children idolise footballers, who represent whole cities in the name of the nation’s favourite sport. Is this really the kind of person that we should call a role model? For women, Ched Evans represents one of the things that is most frightening about the world.
nym of ‘Jean Hatchet’ started an online petition against the re-signing of Evans to Sheffield United and despite the fact that over 150,000 people have signed it, she admitted to Sky News that the abuse she received for starting it was “vicious”. She continued: “One man called for me to be put in an acid bath” and that “they blamed me for jeopardising the club’s chances in the league”. This was not the worst of it. One man expressed to her that he thought it “a shame” that she had “never fallen into the path of Peter Sutcliffe”, the notorious serial killer and rapist. While it is positive that so many signed the position, the response to it from some indicates a much more serious societal problem. Despite Evans’ imprisonment, there are male fans that will defend him to the point where they are wishing the same fate of rape upon other women. This only serves to reinforce the fear among women that it is not worth speaking up about rape. This is not the case because Ched Evans is a sporting star, but would the reaction be the same if he was not? Without his celebrity status, it is much more likely that he would have served his full five-year sentence. The Oscar Pistorius case is not directly comparable to the Evans case, but the two share similarities. Reeva Steenkamp, Pistorius’ girlfriend at the time, was shot four times and killed by him in their home. Pistorius has claimed that severe paranoia caused him to think Steenkamp was an intruder; because of this, Pistorius has been sentenced to five years imprisonment. That is, two years in an insti-
of his own home. Many have seen this as another example of how women have been let down by the justice system, wherein their attackers have served sentences that are either too short or are not served in their entirety. The idea that sporting prestige stands to serve these men was exemplified again in 2013, with the frankly disgusting coverage of the Steubenville rape case in America. CNN referred to the boys on trial, who drugged, raped and sodomized a young girl, as “promising young men”. The girl was barely mentioned; when she was it was only to point out that she was drunk at the time. The main focus was on the fact that the boys were “high school football stars with glittering futures” that were “so cruelly snatched away.” What about the future of the girl? No mention of the horrific impact that the event would have on her life was given. All three of these cases have a common theme – and a disturbing one at that. Despite convictions, it is their status in sport that saves all of these men from the repercussions that they should face, i.e. being shamed out of their previous careers because they are a threat to people’s safety, and serving full, lengthy prison sentences as most non-celebrities would. If Ched Evans is to make a return to professional football, it will say something about the world that should cause all of his supporters to hang their heads in shame. Crimes are punishable for a reason, and are not to be determined by one’s ability to kick a ball.
End of term assignments are the talk of the town in my academic adventure, not that I ever end up starting them until a few nights before the deadline date, despite the rigorous plans I set out for myself when my module guides were handed out. That brings me on neatly to an issue that really grinds my gears. Since when have first years given themselves the right to hog the library computers during this incredibly busy time when their marks don’t even count towards their final degree? Spare me, first year is the time for some outrageous partying, not for sitting in the library like a prick making yourself feel better about the money you’re going to be forking out for these three years of your life. Take my advice freshers of the future: enjoy first year while you can until the torment of second and third year catches up with you. Now October has turned into November, you should be preparing for the cold comrades. I have my Jack Wills quilted jacket and beanie at the ready.
Hugo
As overheard by Victoria Armstrong Illustration by Lewis Bedford
12.lifestyle
Monday 3 November 2014
The Courier
Lifestyle  Editors:  Jack  Dempsey,  Annie  Lord,  Holly  Suttle  &  Tom  Tibble
Jade Holroyd The Friendship Hierarchy
N
o matter how unique you think you and your pals are there are a certain few types of characters that pop up in every friendship group. Whether or not it’s you that falls under these clichÊs, you’re bound to have a friend that does.
The  leader
Whatever they say goes. Despite what the planner may plan, this person always has the final word whether you like it or not. Arguments with this person are avoided at all costs, because you know as soon as you even dare breathe a bad word against them, you’ve got the rest of the group to deal with too. Everyone knows you’re right, but they keep quiet because they know they’ve got no chance going up against the leader.
The  brown  noser They couldn’t be further up the arse of the leader if they tried. They’re never more than two steps behind the leader no matter how hard they have to work to keep up. They know every detail about the leader‌ in fact they probably know more about the leader than the leader knows about themself. You’re not quite sure whether or not this person is aware of how much of a mug they look but you just kind of go with it anyway because you’re not quite sure what other purpose this person would have.
You’re  the  one  that  I  want Our  next  three  blind  dates  will  all  be  in  the  hope  of  ¿ QGLQJ WKH SHUIHFW PDQ IRU RQH OXVW\ ODG\ Hannah  Hannah  Goldstein  has  volunteered  to  be  our  prized  EDFKHORUHWWH DQG VKHœV QRW ORRNLQJ IRU MXVW DQ\RQH :H LQWHUYLHZHG KHU WR VHH H[DFWO\ ZKDW VKHœV DIWHU Where are you from originally? La Grande, Oregon. How do American guys differ from English guys? English guys dress a lot better. Do you feel like you have a type? I pretend like I don’t but whenever I pick someone out of a crowd all my friends know exactly who I’m gonna go for. A lot of them tend to be quite hippy. Zen.
“I like company when I sleep. I told this guy once that I want a glorified heat “Couldn’t be further Zen you say? Youblanket� like a Buddhist monk figure? up the leader’s arse if type Yeah, the mellow type. Not really. OK. So, what are the five most imthey tried� portant qualities that you look for The  mum
Whether you’re hurling your drunken guts up over the kitchen sink, or you’re desperately in need of a shoulder to cry on – this is the person you can count on. They act twice their age, but that’s okay because you’d be lost without their words of wisdom. You haven’t got a bad word to say about them because they’ve looked after you that many times, you really don’t have the right to.
The  butt  of  the  joke This person isn’t on par with the one everyone loves to hate. In fact, this person is quite liked amongst the group. That being said, the dynamics of the group just wouldn’t be same without this person simply for the fact that there wouldn’t be anybody to take the piss out of. They put up with the banter, because‌ well they don’t have any other option, and the only time they have the guts to complain is after the alcohol has started flowing. Bless ‘em.
“They put up with the banter, because they don’t have any other option�
The  one  everyone  loves  to  hate It’s kind of a no brainer; everybody knows who this person is without saying it. They are almost always the main subject of your group chat (the one with everybody in it apart from this person) and it’s always a bit awks when everybody is laughing at their phones and the poor soul doesn’t have a clue what’s going on. Every single thing they do annoys the crap out of you, but for some reason you get a strangely pleasurable sensation out of hating them. Chances are, if a name doesn’t immediately come to mind – hate to break it to you honey, this might be you.
in a guy? Passionate. Stylish. Laid-back. This is really contradictory but, crazy. Laid-back but crazy. Intelligent. Are there any physical attributes that you find particularly attractive? I did have this long hair phase. Beards are pretty nice. Lumberjacks. How is your lifestyle balanced at present? Well I’m lucky enough to study English, so not too many hours there. But then I have work, and I do he Courier,, so not that much spare time. Do you go out much? I used to a lot more than I do now, now I prefer nights with really good music or else events around the city, not necessarily things that go on all night. Such ‘adult’ things. Sounds very sophisticated. Right. Very sophisticated. Well last night after finishing a bottle of wine, I just like chucked it because I’ve never thrown a bottle of wine before and it felt like some-
thing you should do. Well, I hope you were outdoors and not just sat in your room. It was outside of Waitrose, but in the morning when I woke up I was just thinking of little children getting shards of glass stuck in their feet. I felt like such a dick. Do you not find yourself just chilling at home much? I haven’t actually slept at home for over two days. Home is just a base. I prefer to be out. So how would a guy fit into your current lifestyle then? I like company when I sleep? There’s some free hours that aren’t necessarily taken at the minute. I told this guy once I want a glorified blanket. We could save money on heating. Why did you agree to do this? Well I figure I can just make a massive ass of myself in Newcastle and then just run away anyways, so I might as well. How many dates before you would consi d er bringing a guy back to your place? (Hannah stares blankly) No dates? Well‌ It’s happened before, put it that way. I don’t really need to be wined and dined. I think we’ve found our pull quote. No! Jesus, I think we should call this thing Horny Hannah after all. Have you
Hoggphotography.co.uk
“I did have this long hair phase. Beards are pretty. Lumberjacks�
had many boyfriends in the past? Erm, I date people a lot, and then‌ change people a lot. Why do you think that is? I think I’ve realised that I’m the sort of person who just likes a lot of people. I get distracted a lot as well. What sort of places do you like to taken on a date? I think dates where you go for a drink or a meal are just super duper awkward, in general. I mean, you can manage them and I’ve done them before but it’s much nicer when you’re actually doing something.
“I’m not scared very easily. Usually I get bored before I’m scared away�
That’s had a bit of thought put into it. Yeah! Like I’ve gone to the Dene before on a date. And Marsden Grotto, that was really cool - it’s like in a cave. That’s part of why I wanna do this, to go to cool places. What would you hope to ultimately gain from the perfect date? Citizenship. Oh God, this is going to be the evidence when they get me for fraud. How do you feel a guy should behave on a first date? Politely? Well, I’m not scared away very easily. Usually I get bored before I’m scared away, so I’d much rather have one extreme than the other. So like, don’t be proper. Interview by Jack Dempsey
The Courier
.13
Monday 3 November 2014
Culture
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The Date Hannah on Alex
Culture Editor: Kate Bennett Sections: Lifestyle, Fashion, Beauty, Arts, Music, Film, TV, Gaming and Science courier.culture@ncl.ac.uk | @CourierOnline
Hannah Goldstein, 3rd Year English Lit meets Alex McKiernan, 3rd Year Civil Engineering
Alex on Hannah
How do you think the date went? Yeah, good.
Where did you and Alex go to? It was Newcastle Music Week till Thursday, so we went to a free cabaret night, which was definitely my suggestion. Turns out he actually knew someone who was performing, so he had a bit more investment there, but I don’t know how keen he actually was on cabaret. How come? About halfway through, he was a bit like, “This is cool but when’s the cabaret going to start?” And I had to say, “No, this is what cabaret is.” He thought it was just the opening bit.
What were you opinions on her clothing? She looked nice, the fashion editor kept up high standards. Who would you say was the dominant one out of you two? Who would wear the trousers in the relationship? Hannah definitely, she organised everything. Were there any awkward moments? No, she was really easy to talk to.
Was there much drinking involved? I feel quite bad. He had a couple of drinks, but I was really hungover. To be fair, I didn’t stop feeling ill that entire day, so drinking was just not on the table. I felt really bad though. I was kind of encouraging him to drink. Taking advantage…
Did either of you try anything on? No, it was really tame to be honest, neither of us were drunk and it just felt like we were mates. What were your opinions on her personality? She was pretty laid back.
So what were your first impressions upon first meeting Alex? Erm… there’s a boy?
What is your normal ‘type’ and how did Hannah compare to it? Brunette and laid back and nice, so yeah pretty well.
How did he introduce himself? Fine, just had a hug, chatting was easy enough. What kind of things did you chat about? It started out pretty basic just like, what do you do, where are you from. And then when we actually got a bit more comfortable at the cabaret thing I started to ask more lucrative questions.
What is Hannah’s best feature? Her interesting stories, oh and I am partial to an American accent. What was her worst feature? Her nose piercing. I’m not a fan.
How long were you out for? The thing started at eight, we ended up walking back. He came round and I made him a cup of tea. I think my apartments haunted so I was showing him how creepy it is. And that was it.
What was the best part of the date? The walk home, it gave us a better chance to talk. I felt rude talking through the cabaret, I wasn’t really sure what the etiquette was.
So he came back to yours. Did he go home eventually or…? Yes. It was a very civilised.
What was the worst part of the date? I can’t say that anything was that bad. Maybe that we weren’t drunk.
Oh, OK. Were there any bizarre topics of conversation? We had a ‘have you ever pissed yourself?’ conversation. But neither of us did very well. Also he was telling me about rugby banter - no, fuck, he does football - football banter, so I told him a story about two of my mates on a surfing trip, because one of them took a shit on the wheel of the other one’s car, so the other one took the shit and smeared it on a sandwich and put it on the passenger seat, so the guy unknowingly ate his own shit.
Did you think it was rude that she turned up hungover? She had a good reason, it was her friend’s birthday. But if it was me I would probably have got involved and just drank through it. What was better her personality or her appearance? Her appearance.
Did you tell that story to counter the football banter? Yeah, because he was telling me some general stories, like how they had to drink through Weetabix, so I was like, “Oh, on a related topic, I know someone who ate some shit.”
If you could change one thing about the date what would it be? I would do what I normally do with girls on a date, take her to a bar. How does she compare to other girls you have been out with? She’s the first girl I have been on a date with at uni so… she’s up there.
How did he react to the story of the shit sandwich? He accepted that my friends out-bantered his friends.
Who had the better personality out of the two of you? I can’t really say me... she’s more talkative.
How do you feel like you could have performed better on the date? Oh my gosh, for the next guy I date there’s definitely going to be like spinners involved, games, dare cards, I’m gonna make it epic. How do you feel the date itself could have been better? Well I have this rule that going to the cinema on a date is really shit because you don’t get to chat, but I kind of inadvertently did the same thing by suggesting we go to a cabaret because it’s really hard to chat. But the walk home was really good because actually got to talk and it was less awkward. Not many romantic vibes then? Not really and I think that goes both ways. Would you see Alex again? I’m thinking it will probably just happen. I mean he lives with the sports editor, I intend to get drunk at their house at some point. What are you hoping for from the next date then? I want someone who is crazy. How would you rate your date? I don’t believe in rating people.
If you saw her again around uni what would you do? I’d go up and say hi. What did you do when you parted ways at the end of the date? Just hugged. How would you rate the date? A solid 8. What made it worth an 8? She was nice.
Do you want to date Hannah? Email c2.lifestyle@ncl.ac.uk or go to The Courier Lifestyle on Facebook
Was there anything weird about her? She doesn’t like going home to America, why would she not wanna go home? Could you have performed better on the date? I could have talked more.
14.lifestyle
Monday 3 November 2014
The Courier
Lifestyle Editors: Jack Dempsey, Annie Lord, Holly Suttle and Tom Tibble
Kierkegaard on the Toon
G
o out or don’t go out, either way, you will regret both. Which one did I choose, A or B? Either or? I took the leap of faith and delved myself into the realm of the Toon, accompanied by my most intimate confidant, the most faithful mistress that I have ever known – my melancholy. My confidant and I found ourselves down a crooked street, similar to the ones in Copenhagen where only Sinners went, but it was brighter, louder, fouler. Newgate Street. A distorted complex of monolithic windows appeared before us, luring over menacingly, a window into the darkness of my soul. On further observation however I realised that this was no window, it was a gate; The Gate. Where this gate led we didn’t know, but my confidant and I took an abrupt turn to the left and decided to enter into a less threatening abode – Tiger Tiger.
Does ‘The One’ exist?
We’ve all asked ourselves, is there a ‘One’ out there for us? But with apps like Tinder and dating websites falling out of the sky, is the idea of having one soulmate old fashioned or just a fabricated dream? Liz Rosling and Kathryn Holland discuss the possibilities
I
“What if The One turns out to be a massive dick?”
“This place was worse than boredom itself ”
A map detailing the nature of the three floors of Tiger Tiger immediately caught our eyes, and in a moment of clarity I recognised this scripture to be an abstract reflection of the three stages of human existence: the Aesthetic, Ethical, and Religious realms. The clarity subsided as I was struck by a colossal creature, shouting an unknown language whilst pumping his fists in the air as if possessed by a demonic spirit. I felt a deep sense of sorrow for this individual, the veins in his arms protruding out like swollen worms trying to escape from their fleshy entrapment, his head resembling a pea placed delicately on top of a pile of rubble and debris. This physical being had been turned toward the outside, thinking that his happiness lay outside of him and failing to turn inward and discover that the source is within himself. Mounting the spiral staircase to escape the Aesthetic sphere of existence, my confidant hesitated. “Melancholy can’t accompany you in the Ethical realm”, he explained, returning downstairs to nestle in with some other individual experiencing the dizziness of freedom. I entered the Ethical realm and passed a group of females who asked me to take their picture, but as I pointed the camera in their direction, their faces became disfigured; their lips were pushed furiously outward to resemble the bill-like features of a duck. I became aware of the music, managing to decipher a selection of the words, “I’m all about that bass, ‘bout that bass, no treble.” The poet behind this lyrical composition demonstrates a despairing refusal to be herself, by concealing the profound anguish in her heart by denying all forms of existence other than “that bass”, a fearful concept that sent tremors through my spine, prompting me to leave this realm of existence. Finding the staircase leading to the Religious sphere, I mounted it, each step presenting itself as an absurd leap of faith.
“The crazed inhabitants were stumbling all over the place”
I reached the top, the final sphere of existence, the heavenly ‘White Room’. But as I entered I was met with an unnerving feeling of anxiety, the room echoed a deadly numbness in which existed a strewn together collection of soulless white furniture, cushioned walls and padded booths. The midnight hour came and everything was unmasked, the illusion was lifted and the veil rose to reveal this place for what it was, an asylum. The crazed inhabitants were stumbling over themselves in jubilation, as if unaware of this hideous fact. This place was worse than boredom itself; Tiger Tiger is the root of all evil. Acknowledging this I departed swiftly, rescuing my melancholy on the way out and retreating back into my original form of existence. I finished my night as I had started it, feeling like a piece in a game of chess, when the opponent says of it: “that piece cannot be moved”. As told to Jack Adcock
NO
n the Sex and the City episode ‘Anchors Away’ Charlotte declares, after the failure of her first marriage, “Everyone knows you only get two great loves in your life.” Convenient huh? Though Charlotte’s version of The One is technically The Two, the premise is still there: we are constrained by the idea that there’s only one person out there for us all. Why is this? Why do we torture ourselves by trying to find this one person who is supposed to be the key to our happiness? Not only is it statistically impossible, (there are 7.125 billion people in the world) but the idea in itself is dangerous.
I
YES
t’s the age-old debate… Is there really one partner, one perfect predetermined person out there for each of us? Well, I suppose that people’s belief in the existence of such is dependent on their own interpretation of the concept. In my opinion, yes there is. Perhaps not in the fairy tale sense of the phrase, but still, I like to believe that even in this day and age true love in accordance with this idea of The One exists. Let’s talk about soulmates. Google describes a soulmate as the person you have a feeling of deep and natural affinity with, and I consider this to be true. Whilst I admit to being a romantic and a big believer in unconditional and lasting love, the way I see it is that there has to be a reason that love has remained such a universal theme century after century. I know what you’re thinking, with over seven bil-
lion people on the planet, the chances of meeting The One appears dismally improbable at best, if not depressingly impossible at worst, which is why I don’t look at this term in its literal sense. I believe that there are a number of people out there who can fit the role of The One, personal to each of us. The One who you’ll share an inexplicable connection with and (without getting too clichéd and corny) The One who will capture your heart. Perhaps fear is the principal reason why people are skeptical of this, a daunting idea when first thought about. But, like I said, even the definition of soulmate leaves room for the possibility of more than one perfect match. My suggestion, don’t search, don’t settle – just have faith that what’s meant to happen will happen, and when it does, you’ll know!
If there is only one person out there for us and we do find this magical person, what if something happens to them? Does this mean that we are then bound for loneliness and unhappiness forever? What if The One turns out to be a massive dick? It is unhealthy to have so much invested in the idea of that one special person. If a relationship has taken a turn for the worse, don’t hold on to it because you think this person is The One. By holding on you’re causing yourself and the other person to suffer more. What’s more, falling in love is something that happens by chance, it can happen between any two people at anytime. It is not some thing that should be approached with strategic precision. Falling in love with someone should be something that feels free and liberating, something that can be enjoyed. Later in the aforementioned episode Carrie bites the bullet and says, “I refuse to define love in those limited terms.” I believe in this approach. It does no one any good to be constantly on the look out for The One, or to believe that there is only one person out there for you. Spread your wings, have your fingers in many pies, test the dating water and enjoy the freedom of being able to date as many or as few people as you want.
Oh no, I’ve chat myself
Alex Irvine discusses the perils of getting verbal diarrhoea in the club
W
alls throbbing. Speakers pounding. Bodies crashing against each other in a drunken haze. Across the nightclub there’s a repeated scene: guys and girls pushing hair away from someone’s ear, leaning in to shout something, then the weave as each person attempts to work out what the other was saying. Communication isn’t the strong suit of drunk people in a nightclub. Most conversations disintegrate into a series of ‘what’s and ‘pardon’s and then finally end with a confused nod. I realised after volunteering for this article that I, the person who embarrassingly in-
troduced themselves at least 5 times in the space of 10 minutes to a group, probably didn’t have the authority to write this. I asked my friends what they’d ever overheard in a nightclub. The general consensus was that they’d all been far too drunk to ever listen in on one. One told me, “Once there was a conversation for half an hour about the importance of economical geography.” “Wait, did you stay and listen to that for half an hour.. or was that you?” “…It was me.”
“Communication isn’t the strong suit of drunk people ’’
That’s the thing about nightclub conversations, you can’t seek out these moments of brilliance. Most of the time people talk absolute shite for hours. You can only hope you’re lucky enough to catch one brilliant line, and luckier still to remember it in the morning. So here’s a sampling of great lines that didn’t escape into the abyss, on the Newcastle treble bar, nightclub circuit curated for your pleasure: “If LQ was a person I reckon he’d be our lecturer Tom. Bit tragic really. If I was any club I’d definitely be a ‘no trainers’ club. I don’t like trainers.” Over security’s loud speaker: “Some-
one’s furiously masturbating outside CCTV. We can’t get them to stop.” “I fell down the stairs in Sinners and the bouncer said ‘I’m used to women falling at my feet’, I was mortified!” Some guy’s terrible but cute attempt at a pick up line: “You have the posture of a regal! I bet you don’t have any back problems.” “I was pulling a girl then she randomly asked me ‘What tribe are you from?’’’ “I really feel like Milligan’s is the poor man’s Gregg’s” “I was sick in his plant pot but I covered it with confetti and I think he didn’t notice.” “I wouldn’t say I’m pear shaped, I’d say I’m guitar shaped because - look - I’ve got rhythm.”
“Perhaps alcohol unlocks a spiritual awakening in us”
At a band night, two girls were adjusting their make up in the bathroom: “Oh my god, I saw on their Twitter that they like a girl with good eyebrow game. Do they look good?” “Yeah they look good. Do mine?” “Yeah.” Later the girls could be seen trudging behind the band members, heaving the band’s sound equipment along. Maybe there’s the potential in all of us to speak these wise words. Perhaps alcohol unlocks a spiritual and intellectual awakening in us that can only be enhanced by the nightclub atmosphere. We can right the world. We can discover the meaning of life.
The Courier
lifestyle.15
Monday 3 November 2014
Review: Eat4Less Jamie Shepherd checks out the ludicrously cheap cafe that’s taking over Northumberland Street
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decided the best day to hit Eat4Less was on a Friday lunchtime when I had a raging hangover. I had specifically starved myself so that in my drink battered and hungered state I’d be able to devour as many offerings as I could - not recommended. I wasn’t sure what to expect but I can say that I didn’t expect to be queuing in the pissy drizzle of Northumberland Street before I could even get a glimpse of the menus. This was like a bread queue in some ex-Soviet republic.
“This was like a bread queue in some ex-Soviet republic”
dry falafel. To compensate for the dry mouth I had I then went for the 99p Wild Mushroom soup. I wouldn’t go as far as to say the mushrooms were wild and would describe the soup more as straight-edge mushroom soup. It wasn’t the best mushroom soup I’ve ever had but it was by no means the worst. Next up, I went for Thai green curry chicken panini (weighing up at another £1.49), which tasted like somebody had smeared some Sharwoods cooking sauce on to some Sainsbury’s Basics chicken pieces and then flattened a baguette under some irons. Not amazing, but surprisingly edible. To finish I decided to go for the spicy lamb pasty which for a pound, lessened the sting of the extreme carbicide I had put my body through. The pastry had obviously been standing in the heated receptacle since the store had opened earlier in the day as the pastry had the strangely greasy texture of a samosa I once picked up at Victoria Coach station. The meat, had the same tasty flavour but
suspect aura about it, and I had a flashback to that long journey back to Sunderland Park Lane that had me running up the aisles of the Megabus. I didn’t get the shits from this food fortunately.
“Let’s face it, after genocide, there’s nothing worse than dry falafel”
In conclusion, the food at Eat4Less isn’t very good. I’d go as far as say that it’s slightly below average however there’s something about the price that makes it a winning combination. All of the food I got that day came to less than a fiver and I know for a fact that if I’d gone to Pret with that much I’d be nowhere near satisfied. Maybe discounted and suspiciously sourced food is the new quinoa. Who knows?
Inside Eat4Less the vibes turned less bread queue and more refugee camp post-food drop. There’s a saying that if you enter an airport your heart rate’s supposed to automatically increase. Well, the sheer noise, chaos, and cacophony of Eat4Less brought me close to cardiac arrest. And if it wasn’t the aural assault of the restaurant that could have caused my heart to stop, the sheer range of foods available would be enough to really fuck up any regular Adam Richman.
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e’ve all been there, the mad scramble half an hour before that seminar we completely forgot about when our flatmates convinced us to go out last night. Yes, it’s the exact same seminar that we failed to do the work for because we were binge-watching Netflix the night before, shortly after telling promising we’d do the seminar work the next day.
“I’m not necessarily condoning or encouraging this”
Anyway, you can’t possibly skip it for the third time in a row, so now you have to do it – you have to blag the seminar. Obviously this is not exemplary uni behaviour and I’m not necessarily condoning or encouraging this but if you really really must blag it, here are some handy tips. Have a quick read over the questions beforehand. Probably en route as you’re rushing through campus/trying not to fall over on the metro.
“Nod along at whatever everyone else is saying”
Try to come up with a very, very basic answer for a question you can answer partway through the seminar – that way you’ve contributed at some point and you probably won’t get picked on to answer another.
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Selling everything from pizza slices to jacket potatoes, I went for a range of options to get a feel of what this place actually offers. First of All, at £1.49 I went for the falafel wrap with salad and yoghurt dressing. It was distinctly un-yoghurty and the falafel, although flavoursome, was pretty dry. Let’s face it, after genocide there’s nothing worse than
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Befriend someone who HAS done the work and get them to expand upon aforementioned basic answer so you can smile and nod at what they say (“Yes, yes I agree entirely thank you so much that’s exactly what I meant” etc).
Cutting the apron rings
Herbs, Downton and sex faces: for Grace Melville, phoning home has never been more uncomfortable
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How to blag a seminar
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“The wild mushroom soup was much more like straight-edge mushroom soup”
s phoning the parents a chore? It’s okay to think yes, honestly. As a first year the constant phone calls in the first week were comforting, both to me and my mother who only phoned at this point to check I wasn’t starving to death. But over a month in and still not having starved yet, these phone calls home are becoming something I have to put on the to-do list next to laundry and food shopping. In other words, they’re a chore. Don’t get me wrong, I love my mother. I just don’t love to hear about what happened in the car park of Sainsbury’s with that woman who BLATANTLY stole her space or which of my pets have taken to humping one another this week (all of them apparently). I may be seen as somewhat fortunate to have a mother who is, to put it bluntly, absolutely insane, as it means phone calls are rarely boring. However, even I cannot escape the typical questions, the ones which even the wildest imaginations would struggle to make interesting. Here are a few: - Are you eating your vegetables? - Have you remembered to wash your bed linen? - Are you flatmates still nice? - What’s the weather like at the moment? - Grace, are you listening? It sounds like you’re not even listening. At this point in the conversation I usually turn the focus onto her, asking how she’s doing and thus receiving updates on work, traffic, humping animals, my family drama, the plot of Downton Abbey and if I’m lucky, even what new herbs she’s planning to plant in the garden.
Paige Roddam
I’m sure you can now understand why I have to limit these phone calls to once a week maximum. The worst possible phone call to date started very normally, then rapidly changed as I heard the words, “So how many men have visited your bedroom so far?” tittered down the phone, as if my room was a tourist attraction. This was the rock bottom of phone conversations with her. Needless to say I point blank refused to answer at which point my mother replied with, “Well shall I tell you about who’s been visiting my bedroom lately?” At this point I hung up, wondering how long it would be before I could ever speak to her again.
“Don’t get me wrong, I love my mother. I just don’t love hearing about that woman who BLATANTLY stole her space in Sainsbury’s car park’’
But despite all my sarcastic moaning there is a silver lining to this huge dark cloud. It is nice to keep in touch and be reminded that even though the struggle of feeding myself, doing laundry and cleaning is very real, at least I’m not at home fending off rampant animals and having chats about herb gardens and sex face to face with my mother.
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Fake it ‘til ya make it. Nod along at whatever everyone else is saying and try to at least look like you know what they’re talking about. “Yes that’s exactly what I was thinking, I don’t think there’s any way to expand upon that really great answer.”
“‘That’s exactly what I was thinking, I can’t expand on that fantastic answer’”
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And finally, if you are completely desperate, the classic ‘copy the person next to you’ trick still works at least 70% of the time.
Having undertaken some, or maybe all, of these, you should be able to successfully blag the seminar, providing your seminar leader is fairly nice and doesn’t pick on you to answer questions or expand on your one very basic answer. It’ll be fine, honest. Now, whether this does actually work 100% of the time I’m not really sure, but at least you’ll look like you’ve made a bit of effort and hey, at least you turned up, right? In the long run, though, blagging every single seminar is a LOT more effort than actually doing the work for them, trust me, I’ve been there (yep, fresher Paige I’m looking at you). Feel free to employ these blagging skills in times of true and desperate need, but all in all, doing the work is definitely a better option. My verdict? Worth it for the odd hungover seminar, not at all good to do all year.
16.fashion
Monday 3 November 2014
The Courier
Fashion Editors: Amy O’Rourke and Hannah Fitton Online Fashion Editor: Hannah Goldstein
Free the nipple Kathryn Holland
A look into the campaign taking over our Instagram
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f the latest London Fashion week was anything to go by it appears that next season your greatest accessories are… Your nipples. Some designers took a subtle approach. Christopher Bailey paired see through tops with denim jackets, while Tom Ford covered the models nipples with sequins. Other designers, such a Christopher Kane, gave their models nothing to hide behind. From barely there ball gowns to sheer tops, designers embraced the nipple in all it’s glory. This fashion for nipples has come hard on the heels of the Free the Nipple campaign. The Free the Nipple campaign is a film, an equality movement and a mission to empower women across the world. They stand against female oppression and censorship across the globe. It is illegal for a woman to be topless in 35 states in America, this includes breast feeding. The campaign, therefore, is about encouraging both sexes to stand up against the wrongful censorship of the female body and to give women the same rights as men, who are freely able to walk around topless without the fear of censorship.
“The campaign is purposefully controversial, and the basic message being proposed is ‘What’s more obscene: violence or a nipple?’”
You wouldn’t look twice at a man baring his chest on the street or at the beach, yet the female breast has been sexualised and mystified to the point where it has become socially wrong to expose them. As the campaign gained momentum it has gained more and more high profile followers including Rihanna, Scout Willis, Jourdan Dunn and Cara Delevigne. Delevigne is one of the campaign’s biggest champions wearing one of their Free the Nipple tees earlier this year. The t-shirts come emblazoned with a pair of breasts on the front. Not only this, but the model posted a topless photo on the app Instagram to protest against their terms and conditions. The photo pointed out while the app forbids photos of female breasts when the nipple is showing, topless men are allowed to feature, free from censorship. The image shows the anatomical similarities between the male and female breasts. Underneath the male breast however is the word ‘free’, whilst underneath Delevigne’s is the word ‘censored’. The campaign, like Delevigne’s image, is purposefully in your face. Their aim is to raise awareness by being controversial, and the basic message being proposed is, “What’s more obscene: violence or a nipple?” Images of violence, torture and destruction are seen on a daily basis in films and on the television, Facebook recently lifted its ban on decapitation videos, yet it still censors images depicting the female breast. Not only does this seem backwards in many respects, it also encourages an air of misogyny and the mistreatment of women. Overall the message of the campaign is equality, the practice, like Delevigne’s image is heady, designed to illicit a reaction, it’s there for us all to take note and begin to abolish the limitations put onto the female figure.
Best of the bloggers Sara Macauley introduces us to two fashionistas taking over the blogging world one post at a time
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harissa-Rae’s online style diary is a longstanding favourite of mine. Filled with beautifully shot style posts and peppered with restaurant reviews and wish lists alike, this is definitely a blog for the bookmarks bar. The girl behind the blog is 21 year old local sales assistant Charissa-Rae McAneny, whose twitter bio reads: “forcing my shopping addiction onto others through fashion & beauty blogging,” explaining her reasons for blogging more succinctly than I could ever do. Her love affair with fashion is evident in every snappily titled post. I love how Charissa-Rae’s sophisticated style translates into amazingly affordable everyday outfits –most of her looks are based around good old high streets stores - great news for penny watching students everywhere. This blogger babe’s of-the-moment style is ab-
solutely girl crush worthy, although she doesn’t reference one specific inspiration herself, instead explaining; “It’s better to dress for yourself than anyone else. [Inspiration is] when you see outfits that you can tell help make someone realise how beautiful they are because they aren’t afraid to let their personality shine through.” If you need even more convincing that this blog is a must read and you’re a food lover (who isn’t?) then fear not– Charissa-Rae regularly posts reviews of hidden gem restaurants dotted around Newcastle and mouth-watering pictures of all their foodie delights. Enjoy. www.charissarae.com
“Inspiration is when you can see outfits that you can tell help make someone realise how beautiful they are because they aren’t afraid to let their personality shine through”
Steve Booker describes himself as “a lover of fashion, design, photography, technology, people, good food and bloody good coffee!” and his eclectic blog reflects his passions through photographic perfection. The self-titled blog features some of the best male outfit shots I’ve come across and his style is definitely city cool. In my favourite look to date, ‘City Casuals,’ he builds upon key pieces like a classic button up shirt before adding an ASOS bomber to add a splash of colour and a hint of edge. Simple pieces and great tailoring are the key to Steve’s
flawless looks - guys take note. As well as outfit posts, Steve regularly documents his travels and recently posted a series of beautiful shots during his visit to Copenhagan. I’ve definitely caught the travelling bug after reading it. Steve’s style is clearly influenced by the places he goes, and his outfit posts from afar are always beautifully delivered. If you have a bit of a thing about good quality pictures like I do then this blog is definitely the one for you – the whole aesthetic is unbelievably clean, making it easy to get lost in this blog for hours. Another handy feature on Steve’s blog are his regular reviews of bars and restaurants in cities dotted across the world. Whether you’re looking for some style inspiration or just want to stare longingly at incredible locations and food, this blog is definitely worth a click. www.stevebooker.co.uk
Adidas styling session
Hannah Fitton and Lottie Bovill went to the Adidas store to meet the winners of their ‘Be in the line up’ competition, which brought with it £200 of goodies
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n Thursday evening we went down to the Adidas store in Eldon Square to meet the five winners of their ‘Be in the line up’ competi-
tion. The competition saw hundreds of our students upload a photo of themselves, in their street style wear, on to Instagram in an attempt to win £200 worth of Adidas Originals clothing. The winners were met in store by Newcastle’s Adidas Brand Ambassador’s, who helped them pick out a whole new outfit from the Adidas Originals range. With images of people in vibrant vintage Adidas Originals jackets, to cycling through campus on a blue Adidas bike, it made our task of judging the competition extremely difficult. However, it was the most inventive images that made the cut. Mar-
tin Trotter’s picture of himself propping his body horizontally off a lamppost led to him winning the Centaur Originals Trainers, Grey Originals Crewneck and the Hooded Originals Jacket - being an avid skier, the last item is perfect for the NUSSC ski trips. William Burnside captured himself cycling through Newcastle in an Adidas top, with a selfie stick. Guy Vero’s shot of him skating through Jesmond also bagged him some goodies, and he kindly picked a pair of snazzy socks to give to his friend, Ridley, who took the photo for him. The two other winners, Hannah Redman and Polly Hunt, both eyed up the Adidas Originals down puffer jacket. Hannah went for the jacket in a navy blue colour, saying: “I love the coat because it is lightweight in look but in feel it is warm and
perfect for a Newcastle winter. I like the fact that it doesn’t have a hood because Newcastle doesn’t rain a lot either, giving the coat more of a jacket feel”. Polly went for the jacket in black. She explained: “My favourite item was definitely the coat; I didn’t expect to find anything like that at all. I went to the store with jumpers and shoes in mind, but ended up finding an amazing black puffer. So, so cool, probably evident as quite a few of us picked it up”. All five winners left the store extremely happy with their bags full of Adidas Originals goodies. Hannah said, “I really enjoyed the experience because I didn’t realise how Adidas Originals clothing could be accommodated in every day life alongside my normal outfits and so seeing how they can was really exciting”, a sentiment which everybody agreed with.
The Courier
fashion.17
Monday 3 November 2014
thecourieronline.co.uk/fashion Instagram:@thecourierfashion | Facebook: facebook.com/thecourierfash |Email: c2.fashion@ncl.ac.uk |
Fur fashionistas’ sakes
Emily Pentony and Ellen Dixon explore the fur-tastic trend taking over the catwalks
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Debenhams
Topshop
ith the Autumn/Winter season comes the obligatory invade of fur. It’s held the test of time, designers love it and evidently we do too. This seasons Furs have had an update with an injection of colour and print and were seen all over the catwalks. Gucci went for pastel shearling coats whilst Miu Miu channelled their inner ‘Cruella De Vil’ with Dalmatian print furs. As seen on Rihanna (who managed to pull it off as always), Prada used clashing furs to accessorise their leather coats. Whether you want to make a statement with a bold fur, mix things up with a monochrome print or keep it simple with a pastel hue, there is something to suit all tastes. It’s a fun reinvention of a winter classic that is the perfect piece to brighten up your wardrobe. Not forgetting the added bonus of keeping you warm through those chilly northern nights. I’ve spent many an hour drooling over the designer pieces, however with my student loan not quite stretching to the thousands of pounds needed to indulge in a designer piece, I’ve found the High Street stores have some great alternatives that look just as stylish, but won’t break the bank. Debenhams showcase this incredible pastel blue coat that would soften up dark winter knits with a splash of pastel hue. If you’re looking for a wearable print, Topshop has as array of fantastically furry options, including a cosy monochrome Jacket. For for something a bit more eccentric, or you want to use fur to make a statement, Primark’s ombre fur crop coat is the answer. Emily Pentony
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opping up all over the autumn/winter 2014 catwalk shows, fur has taken over as this season’s go-to trend. With it, the fur coat will always dominate; but that’s not all that should be in your sights as you rush to Eldon Square for your high-street alternative. A faux-fur hem, a stole, even a pair of heels, are perfect ways to add texture or glamour to a winter knit or a duster coat. We saw furry sandals for House of Holland, cosy wraps for Marni, and a huge amount of fur lining on the Prada winter coats in the collections for this season. The recent collaboration between Topshop and Marques Almeida has also seen some of the most striking fur items move from the catwalk to the high street, and how can we complain?! Just looking at them will make you think of Christmas, but their neon prints won’t let you forget the summer just yet. As we wave good-bye to the neon or the floral two-piece we welcome with open arms this cream set from Topshop. It comes with a gorgeous fur trim, like Santa but a little bit cuter. It’s not the cheapest, but it is perfect for a winter party, or just as a treat from you, to you. There are far too many fur stoles on the high-street to commend just one, but to add a bit of muted colour to an all-black look, a pale green stole from Miss Selfridge adds just enough to brighten your outfit up on the dark mornings. Plus, it’ll keep you really warm. Finally, the black heels from Topshop are a shining example of how to do fur without going too far. Enough to liven up a simple LBD, a pair of furry shoes surely have to be the staple for the season, although you might struggle to keep your toes warm in these. Ellen Dixon
Forty thousand sleeves under the sea Louisa Barnard meets the face behind ethical clothing company Submarine
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ustom hand made t-shirts; Submarine offers a variety of alternative and ethical clothing, which are all designed and packaged to a very high standard. One of its aims with all of its products is to source and produce organic materials. What I personally love so much about the company is its unorthodox and unique designs. It is very refreshing to see good quality t-shirts sold at a very reasonable price. I appreciate that we ‘love a bargain’ and that ‘fast fashion’ is a quick and easy way to buy clothes, but I think searching for something new and different opens the possibilities for originality and unconventional clothing.
“Can companies really justify charging huge mark ups on their products when they barely pay their workers who have no choice but to work inhumane hours in unsafe conditions yet still live in poverty?” When speaking to the designer, Henry Crew, it was evident he had a resilient passion for trying to change the way we buy clothes. He stated, “can companies really justify charging huge mark ups on their products when they barely pay their workers who have no choice but to work inhumane hours in unsafe conditions yet still live in poverty?” Although the company is small, it is evident to me that there will be many more designs in the near future. Personally, my favourite t-shirt is the daisy design. I love its simplicity and intention to keep it a plain black and white striking design. What inspired you to start the company? I wouldn’t say I was inspired, more aggravated to the point where I thought I’ll just do this myself. I became fed up with not being able to find any clothing that appealed to me at a reasonable price, and I didn’t think it was right that companies were buying in t-shirts at 5p to then sell for £25/£30, at
the expense of the people harvesting the cotton or manufacturing the t-shirts. What is your main message with Submarine? Our main message is that affordable fashion can be good for everyone. What makes you different from other companies? Submarine is different from other companies because it’s built on a set of morals that we truly believe matter. Moreover, not only do we provide clothes for those wanting something different, but we have also set up our own live music events to accompany the brand. Where do you want to see the company in five years time? I haven’t really thought where we will be in five years time. I’m more passionate about where the music and clothing industry be in five years time. If we could force others to think about what they are producing and who it affects that would be great. As for music, if we can grow the live events to a point where we have helped some people in their own journey, and garnered the reputation of a successful and popular night. www.submarineclothing.co.uk
Banish the buckets Connor McDonnell
These hideous, heinous crimes are an offence to fashion, to men, and to heads in general
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urberry’s S/S 2015 menswear collection includes some rather garish bucket hats and I just cannot get my head in to it. With their inappropriately angled brim and all-round formlessness they are a monstrosity of headwear among the league of otherwise tasteful alternatives. Worst of all is the brazen swagger that possesses the ego of the casual wearer. However, musicians have an odd affinity with bucket hats. In the strange realm of music that is hip-hop, it is common to see bucket hats perched upon the heads of lyrical slingers such as Odd Future’s Earl Sweatshirt, Schoolboy Q and, obviously, everybody’s favourite hat aficionado, Pharrell Williams, who takes the cake for the most acceptable bucket hat wearing.
“I must confess that I have worn one myself... as a child, on a beach, against my will. I’d rather have had sunstroke”
Another iconic bucket hat wearer was the gonzo journalist Hunter S. Thompson. It was acceptable for Thompson to don a bucket hat as he regularly binged on drugs (Fear & Loathing, anyone?) and probably thought the hat would double as a helmet to protect him as he hallucinated his way on through the dreaded Bat Country. A bit of trivia: he asked Johnny Depp to shoot his ashes in to orbit after he died. What a guy.
“With their inappropriately angled brim and just all around formlessness they are a monstrosity of headwear among the league of otherwise tasteful alternatives”
It takes the monumental capacity of cool comparable to these guys to pull off a bucket hat as a serious accessory, so you may as well concede yourself to a measly beanie, snap back, or if you feel you belong somewhere higher up on this hypothetical cool-scale, perhaps a fedora or Panama hat. I must confess that I have worn one myself... as a child, on a beach, against my will. I have photographic evidence of this child cruelty. Upon subsequent realisation of aforementioned abuse, I have forsaken my mother for ignominiously placing the odious Kangol accessory on my tiny, unwitting, three year old cranium. Sharon, for future reference, I would rather suffer severe sunstroke. To summarise, unless you intend on producing melodic pop songs about the pimps in the crib, or intend on trawling the Pacific for tuna, or happen to be somewhere around Barstow, do yourself a favour and banish the bucket hat from your life.
18.beauty
Monday 3 November 2014
The Courier
Beauty Editors: Charlotte Davies and Charlotte Maxwell Online Editor: Kathy Davidson
The best of beauty
Hangover hairstyles Ellen Walker talks us through how to style your tresses the morning after the night before
Kathryn Holland tells us how to cope with the post-Hal- loween nightmare of face paint and backcombed zombie hair
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alloween has always been a traumatic time for my skin and hair. Face paint, fake blood and copious amount of hair spray leave me overall with a rather bedraggled look. You think I’d learn my lesson and not daub my face with face paint. It makes my skin really flaky and dry looking. This year however, I decided to tackle the ensuing damage head on. My friends and I had to decide on zombie brides. This meant a light layer of white face paint, dark eye makeup and fake blood dripping from underneath my eyes. Those of you who’ve used fake blood before know that it is a bitch to get off. I tackled it in stages:
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To get the top layer off I thought it best to use make up wipes, my thoughts being that it would be less messy than trying to wash it all in the sink. I used Simple Kind to Skin Facial Cleansing Wipes, I find they are less harsh on your skin than other brands.
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After the initial face wipe attack, a good amount of the fake blood had come off and the majority of the white. When I was younger my skin was prone to break outs and I searched for ages to find a face wash that tackled dry skin that was prone to blemishes. The answer came in the form of Clinique’s anti blemish solutions cleansing foam. It removes makeup and excess oil without leaving your skin feeling stripped. I applied the foam all over and removed with warm water and a flannel.
“Those of you who’ve used fake blood before know that it is a bitch to get off. I tackled it in stages”
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The foam had done its job well. I was left only with a hint of red. The Body Shop’s Honey and Oat 3-in-1 scrub mask is a great exfoliator, it keeps your skin moisturised and smells great. I left it on for 5 minutes before washing off. I was now fake blood free!
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Finally I applied a thin layer of Philosophy’s Hope in a Jar moisturiser. It keeps my skin moisturised and quenched all day long without feeling sticky or heavy. At long last my skin felt refreshed and healthy again. My hair, fortunately, didn’t take so long to recover. I recently discovered L’Oreal Elvive Fibrology Thickening shampoo and conditioner. I have naturally really thin hair and this shampoo makes it feel much thicker and volumised. One quick shampoo and a condition and my hair was full of life again. My Halloween nightmare was over. No more fake blood or white face paint, my hair and skin were back to normal. Fingers crossed I remember this for next year!
Tip of the Week
Awaken those peepers after a heavy night out by using a flesh coloured eye pencil on both the inner water line and inner corner of the eyes. This helps to distract from any redness and create the illusion that you’re wide awake.
Half up-half down
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his is my number one go to style after a night out, it takes a matter of seconds and can still look super stylish if you do it right. Start with a spritz of dry shampoo into the roots and briefly brush through all of your hair, gently backcomb the very front section at the roots for a bit of volume. Separate your hair horizontally just above the middle of your scalp, drop the bottom half and grab the top half into a high pony, gently combing the sides back as you go. Secure with a bobble then adjust the top accordingly by pulling small sections forward with your fingers, you may want to use a few grips here for extra support if you have a fringe or layered hair. Finish with slightly backcombing the top of the ponytail and the roots of the hair you’ve left down. Finally, give an all over mist of hairspray - that is, if you can handle the vodka-like stench of hairspray after a brutal Digital Monday. This style works brilliantly if your hair was curled the night before.
Circular bun
hances are, the morning after a big night out in Newcastle, your hair is already going to resemble a bird’s nest; luckily, for this look, you can use that to your advantage. Begin by making the lengths of your hair as wild as possible, use mousse or scrunching gel if you have any to hand, and then dramatically backcomb for serious volume: the amount of backcombing needed will depend on the thickness and length of your hair. Pull the hair back into a fairly loose high pony and add volume to the front of the hair, similarly to the last style, by teasing the front of the hair with your fingers until you’re happy with it. Split the hair in the ponytail into 6 sections, with each one, roll it outwards, away from the bobble loosely from the bottom upwards . Secure each section with a couple of hair grips until stable; repeat with each section of hair until you have a messy ‘halo like’ effect. Again, tease the hair gently to cover any gaps or flaws in the bun, securing with more grips and finish with enough hairspray to keep it secure. This style is easier with long or middle length hair.
Slicked back pony
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f your hair’s a bit greasier than you’d expected after a night out, don’t panic! Use it to your advantage to create this sleek and easy to master twist on a normal ponytail. Start by brushing through all of you hair to make it nice and smooth; apply gel or hairspray onto your brush and tightly comb back the top and sides of your hair until it looks smooth and glossy. Lift the lengths of the hair into a high ponytail, brushing and smoothing as you go to keep it slicked back neatly. Secure the ponytail tightly with a bobble. Take a small section of hair from the bottom of the ponytail and wrap it around the bobble, as many times as it will go, then secure with a grip or two. This hides the hair bobble and instantly gives the style some elegance and class. To finish, gently backcomb the top of the ponytail for that extra boost. This style worked really well for me the day after I’d had sleek, straight hair for a TupTup Palace Thursday night out.
Pretty kitty: Shupette Tessa Jones discusses Lagerfeld’s new feline-themed collection
“L
e maison de Shupette is now open!” announced Karl Lagerfeld via his Twitter page on 15 October. The makeup range in collaboration with cosmetic giants Shu Uemura and inspired by his beloved cat Choupette has arrived. Yes, a cat has its own high-end beauty collection. This may sound absurd but any fan of Lagerfeld will be aware of the high regard in which he holds his feline muse and how lavishly she lives. This is also not the high-flying kitty’s first foray into the human fashion world, with a lifestyle advice book penned in her name and an impressive social media presence. It’s also no surprise that Shu Uemura have chosen to collaborate with the German designer to launch their festive holiday collection. When colouring his own fashion illustrations, it is well known that Lagerfeld uses various products, specifically the eyeliner pencils from the long-established cosmetics company as opposed to more traditional pencils. The website description cites ‘this season – Paris is in, fur is in and Shupette is very in’ and if the pioneering makeup brand have their way, then this will very much be the case. The capsule collection features eye shadow and lip palettes with a solid range of colours from brights to neutrals, blusher shades and cleansing oil. To finish all this off, they have designed a handy layered metal cosmetic case to keep everything in,
and Shu Uemura’s arguably most famous product, their eyelash curlers, have been given the Choupette treatment too. The makeup brushes have tiny cat paws padding up the wands, much like on the side of the nail varnish bottles. The glamour puss’ signature white fur and piercing blue eyes feature prominently throughout, with an illustration of the pampered cat on the majority of the products to really prove their point. The palettes themselves are covered in white faux fur, with cute little ears and bright blue jewel eyes, leaving no doubt in your mind exactly who the inspiration is behind the brand’s second collaboration with the head of Chanel. The colour palettes chosen mean you can use all the products in both your day and night looks, although I’d perhaps leave the false eyelashes adorned with pink faux fur and diamante for one of your more special occasions. Back to Lagerfeld’s launch tweet, the ‘maison de Shupette’ he mentions also includes an extension to the Shu Uemura website, whereby you can ‘talk’ directly to Mademoiselle Lagerfeld and ask her advice on your beauty needs, whilst taking a tour of her virtual Parisian pad. Bizarre maybe, but she seems to know what she’s meowing about. Much like Choupette, her name-sake collection pretty much has it all, so if you’re looking to purrfect your cat-eye or have a thing for felines, check it out before it’s too late.
The Courier
beauty.19
Monday 3 November 2014
thecourieronline.co.uk/beauty Instagram  @courier_beauty   |  Twitter  @CourierBeauty
Meet  the  blogger
Emily  Pentony  PHHWV DQRWKHU RI 1HZFDVWOH 8QLÂśV Âż QHVW IDVKLRQ EHDXW\ DQG OLIHVW\OH EORJJHUV Daisy  Ridley  to  chat  about  everything  from  starting  to  up  your  own  blog  to  skincare  must-Âhaves v
It’s  all  about  the  skincare  routine
Blogging  pressure “It’s hard balancing uni and blogging and I feel like I constantly should be posting. I’ll find myself on holiday, lying on the beach and suddenly thinking ‘Oh I should be blogging this’, but sometimes you just have to relax�
“Before I started blogging, I used to be a face wipe girl (gasp!) but looking after your skin is so important. My all time favourite product is Alpha H Liquid Gold - putting it on after cleansing leaves your skin so smooth and its great for oily skin. Sticking to a range of skincare allows the products to work the best together and the ‘Simple’ skincare range is great whilst finding out your skin type.�
Be  persistent
The  blogging  community
“I started blogging as a hobby after finding the first year of uni difficult and it took me about 6 months to really get it going. The essentials of a good blog are having a clean and simplistic design, high quality photos and a consistent name. With this, a passion to blog and persistence your blog will start to grow�.
“I started my blog after meeting bloggers on a fashion shoot and since then I’m constantly inspired by others. Lily Melrose’s blog LLYMRS is my favourite - it’s amazing. There is a great bloggers’ community especially in the North East and it’s what I love most about blogging. I’ve met so many great people through networking and events. I would love to get into vlogging and follow in the footsteps of the likes of Zoella and Tanya Burr. Having your own beauty line is the ultimate in beauty blogging success.�
The  ultimate  tip The lovely Agnes Daisy then left us with a top beauty tip: “My new find is Bio Oil; putting it on before foundation gives your face a lovely dewy look.�
For more of Daisy’s lifestyle, fashion and beauty tips, head over to her blog agnesdaisy.com
James  Murphy  visited  Forth  Street  Barbers  for  a  slick  shave  and  re-Âstyle
L
you want when going to get a haircut, you want the person cutting your hair to look like they take pride in their appearance if they are going to be sending you out into the world with your new neat trim. Before I walked in I was completely unsure of what to do with my hair but the feel and sharpness of the place made me go for a hairstyle similar to the one Leonardo DiCaprio had the in the Great Gatsby. I settled in to the chair and was made to feel very at ease, the conversation flowed naturally. For me personally a haircut is the height of acceptable male pampering! No one wants awkward situation of sitting in silence
Lucy  Snowden  shares  her  top  3  beauty  Instagram  accounts Michelle  Phan  @michelle- phan
This beauty blogger is quite possibly the queen of all beauty bloggers - Michelle has 1.8 million followers on her Instagram page and 4 million followers on her YouTube make up channel. Not only is her make up always flawless, but there is never a hair out of place. Her Instagram page is perfect for finding beauty inspiration as she is always so put together regardless of whether she goes for grunge, sporting deep purple lips and smoky eyes or goes glamorous and groomed for a night time look. Her enthusiasm for beauty shines through in her profile and has now extended her talents by releasing a how-to book on all things beauty, ‘Make Up: Your life Guide to Beauty, Style and Success’ which she describes as a self-empowering – well worth a read!
Lily  Melrose  @llymlrs
I  know  this  great  little  salon ast week I walked through the doors of Forth Street Barbers for the first time. I was slightly nervous about agreeing to have my first ever straight razor shave, images of Sweeny Todd and the godfather in my head, as well as letting someone new cut my hair. However, as soon as I walked through the door I could tell this was my sort of place, a prim and proper Gentleman’s barbers with a definite touch of class. Pictures of classic icons such as James Stewart and Frank Sinatra adorned the walls and the hairdressers were all wearing the sharpest suits. This is everything
Best  Beautygrams
whilst getting your haircut. I feel I should also mention that I have two scars on the side of my head, which on some days I am self-conscience about and that a great job was done to cover them up. I loved my neat, new trim and at just £7.95 with a student card it was less than half price of what I normally pay for a haircut at other salons around the city. The next stage was my first ever straight razor-shave otherwise known as cut-throw razor shaves; given the later name you can see way I may have been slightly unnerved. So you may be shocked to discover that having a razor placed against my neck turned out to be one of the most relaxing experiences of my life, I almost fell asleep. The process, involving hot towels, relaxing aromas and a steady hand, produced the closest shave I have ever had and I can’t wait to have another. I left the Barbers feeling completely refreshed and revitalised having loved my experience there. Quite simply with these prices, at this quality, there is really no reason for the men to get a haircut anywhere else. Forth Street barbers is located on Forth Street in Newcastle city centre, a 2 minute walk away from central station appointments are not necessary for haircuts but are for shaves. For more information and updates, contact them on 07798 612402, http://forthstreetbarbershop.co.uk/
Lily Melrose is constantly topping the best beauty blogger lists and it’s not hard to see why, she has such an attainable look for her Instagram followers. Her speciality is really finding affordable products and creating a look which appears way more expensive, something every one of us strapped for cash student wants. Not only does she do make up tutorials on her blog and regularly posts on Instagram, she also has a sister blog for all her fashion best bits which you should definitely sneak a peek at if you like her beauty tips. On her page you can expect to see glamorous snapshots of Lily’s beauty and fashion finds as well as updates on her day to day, with a cocktails or two thrown into the mix. If you like your glamour to be non-fuss and attainable (who doesn’t?) then you will love this Instagrammer.
Tanya  Burr  @tanyaburr Originally I found out about Tanya Burr through her YouTube channel which has endless beauty tutorials, then I followed her on Instagram so I could keep up with all her best beauty tips on the go. She has built up such a strong fan base that she has now created her own beauty line, Tanya Burr Cosmetics, which you can see her sporting in daily Insta selfies, as she is promoting the line right now. Her speciality is putting together celebrity looks and making the Alist glamour attainable for us mere mortals. Some of my favourite videos are her Cheryl Cole inspired tutorial and a recent Autumn make up tutorial; as the weather gets chillier and the leaves turn brown, we can still look amazing thanks to her. She looked amazing when she attended London Fashion Week and if you just look at those perfect eyebrows – how could you not have serious brow envy?
20.arts
Monday 3 November 2014
The Courier
Arts Editors: Lucy Chenery and Becka Crawshaw Online Arts Editor: Jess Harman
Occasion Festival: the highlights Holly Argent and Shivangi Kumra take a look at Newcastle’s new art festival T
Holly Argent underlines the importance of art in the virtual and televised environment
T
he Arts TV Forum 2014 was held at the BALTIC Centre for Contemporary Art on Wednesday 22nd and luckily I nabbed a free ticket. A night put on by Northern Film & Media (NFM) and the BALTIC with the intention of discussing art-based programming and the issues around televising it, it questions whether you put art on the TV or if you put TV programmes about art on the TV? An ‘in-conversation’ with Alan Yentob, Creative Director at the BBC by the Guardian’s Maggie Brown, made weight of Yentob’s impressive resume – there is none quite like it for sure. ‘Cracked Actor’ (1975) a film of ‘close friend’ David Bowie and the Imagine Series are debatably his most pioneering. The discussion quickly took on the issues around funding in the arts, in particular (certainly later on in the panel discussion) how the BBC has yet to dedicate a whole channel, for example BBC4, to the arts. Being a student studying arts outside of London, it was particularly interesting to hear Yentob defend the BBC after accusations on regional-bias when it comes to activity outside of the capital. I’d agree there is progress being made but I’m not convinced the North East is being invested in as much as other places like Edinburgh and Manchester. Premier screenings of two new short films made by artist-filmmakers Ben Jeans Houghton and Sophie Michael through NFM and BALTIC’s ‘Artist’s Cut’ initiative were also shown for the first time. There is a large community of wonderful creatives in Newcastle, and the North East as a whole, and I think I stand for the majority when it comes to hoping that larger media or arts organizations soon recognize the overwhelming potential and import they’re funding here. Ben Jeans Houghton, being an artist who lives and practices in Newcastle, exemplifies the high level of talent there is in the North East. The panel of highly influential people – involving leading arts TV commissioners Mark Bell (BBC), Alison Clark-Jenkins (Arts Council England), Phil Edgar-Jones (Sky), Richard Klein (ITV) and Susie Wright (Channel 4) – debated where Arts Council funding should be placed. Anyone heard of The Space? No? Me neither, so what does that say about the quality of selection by the Arts Council for whom they invest their relinquishing money in. The Space is described on the Arts Council website as “a pilot digital arts service and commissioning programme launched in May 2012… in partnership with the BBC… as a live, free and ondemands service through which audiences could access a wide range of arts digitally”. Theoretically this is a viable and generative concept but the only channel that boasts an impressive commitment in my eyes is Channel 4: showing 200 short films a year (many artists and unknown filmmakers) and an innovative Random Acts series. To end, a quote from Don Boyd (HiBROW) whose closing words were the most confident and encouraging the whole night ‘anyone in this room can create amazing art and have it shown’. That commitment and passion for the art itself as well as televising it is what artists working in film and video will hopefully hear more from in the future. Image: Holly Argent
he hippest, and possibly the ‘artiest’ night I’ve ever been to as a student, was host to the final night of OCCASION’s festival debut. The quirky exhibits and musical performances seemed somehow well placed in their art against the exquisite gothic and Tyneside Classical architecture of the 132-year-old building they were contained in. A dark, cold, beam leaden space lit up by an orange glow, housed a sporadic collection of videos, sounds works and photographs. With funky Norwegian DJ, Admir Korjenic pumping out some Nordic house tunes to the few who dared to strut their stuff, it could almost be mistaken for one of those hip Berlin-esque underground hideouts. Curious to know more of the story behind the collaborative piece, I inquired the organizers who explained to me that Ben Freeth and Sean Cotterill had found certain old mining maps with hand painted lines of gold representing where mineral veins were found, so they took a guided tour down these mines , taking with them a big load of sensors (such as heat and movement) and all the data was recorded. This data was put in a program that codified it – converted that raw data into sound and manipulated the different elements of the sound.
standably hard to get perfect in such a large high ceilinged space). The sound to Bailey and Maier/Becker’s videos and Charlie Dearnley’s piece weren’t always that clear. Although I didn’t quite catch every word Paul Becker and Johannes Maier wrote as a crafted stream of consciousness from a Sloth who thinks in poignantly humorous and intelligent threads (I am a man of my own making, she says.
“The industrial setting was near perfect for Turc’s atmospheric punctuated beats”
2013) it still managed to charm. The triumph of the night was the dark and slow vibes of electronic music duo Turc. The un-signed act seamlessly produced live experimental soundscapes in front of a cool head-bobbing crowd. The
“At times the acoustics suffered so that the sound to certain pieces weren’t always that clear”
“It could almost be mistaken for one of those hip Berlin-esque underground hideouts”
When asked about where Occasion could be seen in the future, my friend Adam joked “as big as Glastonbury” but then emphasized that they were likely to eventually have their own place that people could come along to and appreciate the art. This might just be the next big thing.
Another interesting exhibit included a locally produced film representing the Heritage of Newcastle’s concrete architecture, which played in one of their most austere lectures, making it an even grander experience. The program also had several musical events throughout the night. Unfortunately at times the acoustics suffered (under-
Images: Shivangri Kumra
Dylan Moran: The Stand
W
hen sitting in a dimly lit, underground room of The Stand you’d half expect security to pounce upon the latest individual to stumble onto the stage of Wednesday’s best amateur comedy night, Red Raw. He is, after all, supporting an unkempt black matte of hair, swigging on a large glass of red wine and spouting slurred insults at the audience. But instead the crowd erupts into nearly deafening applause, for this is the glorious, “very, very special headline act” Dylan Moran, who by the way probably won’t like you.
“While some other comedians who played relied on crass sex jokes, Moran used razor sharp satirical insight” It’s a pleasure to realise that Moran is still every bit as moody and spiteful as his Black Books counterpart Bernard Black, continuing his loathing of the outside world and young people perfectly; even going as far as lambasting a young student in the front row who had the cheek to put his feet up on the stage sending the audience roaring. He’s managed to make his transition from ‘young and skinny wastrel’ to ‘tubby middle aged man’ who has to cling onto the floor every time he eats too much cheese very efficiently and secretly. Whilst some other previous comedians who played that evening relied on crass sex jokes and cheap shots at religious belief, Moran retorted with razor sharp satirical insight on a range of topics including treating supermarket shopping as a buffet, not caring when the next IOCV35whatever (iPhone) update will come out and his 27-year fight to quit smoking with a polar bear… who also smokes. It was a fantastic performance which left you craving for wittier, intelligent humour much like Moran’s craving for red wine and ciggies. Rosie Bellini
industrial setting was near perfect for their atmospheric punctuated beats and with a show in Newcastle next month (though this time without the entertaining shadow dancers) I think they’re sure to gain a supportive crowd. This is a great example of the unseen talent that has been for-fronted by the curators Adam Goodwin and Claire Gomez all weekend.
Lights and Shadows
U
ncovered with the 2006-08 refurbishment of Tyneside cinema, Peter Yates’ mural which can be viewed at the cinema’s Electra screen, fourth floor - is a testament to the late Novacastrian architect and his involvement in our city. Yates’s professional life spanned across Europe (in particular, Paris) once he was invited, early in his career, by one of his key influences Le Corbusier, to work on the famed New Crystal Palace. It was here that he was involved in the Pyramid project.
“It is a token of the gems this age-old beauty of a film house makes accessible”
Corbusier held a desire for organic matter within the crystal pyramid. However, his pupils opposed this. They conceptualised a greater link between geometry and the resilient crystal; clearly Yates had some fight. This sense of geometry comes through in the patterns and repetition prominent in Tyneside’s 1976 mural. Yet, what is so striking is how the bold shapes, which existed in such a flat form, succeed in communicating the process of Victorian filmmaking in such an organic way. Flat linear characters are intensely life-like and the quirks of contemporary filmmaking techniques are made more powerful by the striking shapes. Corbusier would have approved. Yates’s legacy of some of the most freethinking and creative Tyneside buildings continues with local (but now expanded) practice Ryder Architecture - once Ryder and Yates - and most interestingly, the radical redevelopment of Newcastle Central Station. This mural is a token of the gems this age-old beauty of a film house makes accessible and a nod towards the gems produced by the North East. Melissa Wear
Mixtape: Live Theatre
I
very rarely find myself in a position where I have nothing positive to say about a show, however I am unable to find a silver lining in Mixtape: Number 1s, other than it is mercifully short. The premise is simple: the company act out the lyrics to popular songs while encouraging the audience to guess the song that inspired the sketch. The team that guesses the most correctly wins the ‘golden mixtape’. If Mixtape: Number 1s is inspired by modern music, however, then it embodies everything that is wrong with that medium; it is abrasive, repetitive, and childish beyond measure. Each sketch makes the same joke - that the lyrics of popular songs are often weird when taken out of context. However, having not laughed at the joke the first time, by the eighteenth time patience begins to wear thin.
“Mixtape embodies everything wrong with the medium; it is abrasive, repetitive, and childish beyond measure”
As the majority of each sketch is exclusively composed of song lyrics there is no room for creativity from the cast. The company of Mixtape seem to have dug their own graves, as any acting or comic ability on their part is completely masked by the restrictive nature of the format and concept. For those who are looking for pub quiz style entertainment before a night out, I could perhaps stretch to recommending Mixtape. But if you are looking for comedy or theatre, I’d advise you to look elsewhere. Mixtape is for those with a very acquired taste. Becky Harrison
The Courier
arts.21
Monday 3 November 2014
Under the covers Joy Division - Closer (1980)
T
here is a subtle beauty on the cover of Closer. Designer Peter Saville put the idea together after noticing a rather sombre photograph in a magazine of the Apianni family tomb in Genoa. It’s doleful and austere, giving more than a nod to the harrowing trajectory that lay inside. Pretty fitting that this was released 2 months after Ian Curtis’ death.
“Doleful and austere, giving more than a nod to the harrowing trajectory that lay inside”
B
Bjork - Debut (1993)
ridging the gap between her noisy art-rock antics with fellow Icelanders The Sugarcubes and future solo outings, self-explanatory Debut was when Bjork came into her often berserk, hard-to-place self. True to form, Bjork’s album cover is captivating and cryptic. Dressed in a wool sweater with a monochrome backdrop behind her, she places her hands to her mouth, expressing an emotion which isn’t at all clear. Is she looking at us in hope, horror? Is she crying? Praying? Begging? We’ll never know.
“Bjork’s album cover is captivating and cryptic”
thecourieronline.co.uk/arts c2.arts@ncl.ac.uk | @CourierArts
Will Ibbott takes a look at the covers of his favourite albums Patti Smith - Horses (1975)
T
his is one on the most memorable covers. Patti Smith looks back from a distance, fixing her scornful gaze on the camera. She is androgynous, aloof and slightly jaded. It was this kind of aesthetic which embodied the image of the empowered woman in punk rock. Patti Smith is very much in charge here and is warning you not to fuck with her.
“It was this kind of aesthetic which embodied the image of the empowered woman in punk rock”
Dust or The Day The World Ended
“N
ew York was once great but now exists only as an homage to what once was, it is far to indebted to an entropic return to plant life” says Charlie Dearnley, curator of this photography show. I popped along to Newcastle’s buzzing Brewdog on the opening night of Dust or the Day the World Ended on 13th October 2014. Charlie Dearnley and John Cornbill’s work projects a view of urban decay, solitude and desolation and is concerned with the “hypothetical narratives of what individuals were doing the day the world ended”. Jon and Charlie created pieces to explore this apocalyptic state.
“The work projects a view of urban decay and solitude”
The venue’s atmosphere, crafted by beer drinking visitors, was far more upbeat than the theme of the work, which was a relief I have to say. However, Brewdog’s dimly lit, metropolitan style complimented the work down to a T. Wandering round the venue I had a closer look at the artwork, which consisting of prints, photography and a publication of Charlie’s text. Half way up the stairs of the exhibition was a series of repetitive prints by Cornbill on small pieces of wood. The prints appeared to be grainy, industrial and decaying. The fact that the words were obscured added to the mysterious question: was this really the end of the world? The music, performed by Roo Carpenter and Hector Mann, added a contemporary buzz to the exhibition. High volume and electronic beats filled the room, bringing the work to life. Lucy Chenery
Mark Watson
I
was unsure as to what to expect as I took my seat in the Northern Stage theatre, only to find Watson astride a treadmill on the stage, conversing with the audience before the show. Having not seen much of this rather nerdy-looking pseudo-Welshman other than appearances on panel shows such as Mock The Week, I was slightly apprehensive.
“A somewhat cathartic recollection of the more personal sections of his life”
I had no right to be. Mark’s new show Flaws is a somewhat cathartic recollection of the more personal sections of his life; be it his lengthy battle with alcohol as a nervous entertainer or the nightmarish experience of 10am children’s films with his young son (an event he gleefully recreated for us onstage). The anxiety he frequently refers to certainly does seem to be present, and fifteen minutes went by before I feel he is used to the space he performs in, but this serves to make the show feel extremely organic. Never once did I get the impression he invented any part of his story, and I must say I felt fully entranced for the vast bulk of it.
“The show focuses on many of the self-professed flaws within various aspects of Watson’s personality”
A fabulous pragmatism pervades Mark’s character, as well as the odd surrealist outburst (calling his toaster a bell-end, to start with) providing a humorously crushing sense of the difficulty of human life. The whole show focuses on many of the selfprofessed flaws within various aspects of Watson’s personality, such as being a ‘people-pleaser’, but I certainly couldn’t see enough to prevent me going back. A damn good show. Oliver Burton
Making the arts accessible to all Snapchat, Vine and Instagram are as artistically valid as Michelangelo, and far better at taking the arts out of stuffy gallery spaces and into people’s lives
“A
load of meaningless crap that rich people do in their spare time”. That’s the classic student response to my question: ‘what are the arts’? Not exactly a shocking revelation, but how did they become so unpopular? I think it all stems with our first experience of them. Some parents took their kids to an overtly sexual contemporary dance show, where, after watching two hours of sweaty, writhing bodies, they were emotionally scarred for a good deal of their adolescence. My parents were decidedly more mediocre: stuck for things to see in London, they dragged me into an art gallery. All I did was look around for a good place to sit down and wait, because frankly, staring at weird paintings of bowls of fruit over and over again didn’t thrill me – even the novelty of the explicit nudes quickly wore off. And I think that experience of art made me think that it was boring and irrelevant to everyone my age. But we’re far more involved in ‘the arts’ than we think. Film and TV have arrived and that art which I disliked so much has developed into weird squig-
gles on a blank canvas… which I dislike just as much. However, it has also developed into photography. And finally I’m going to get to the point of my column – Instagram.
“Instagram is the artistic movement of our generation”
‘The arts’ are defined as ‘an outlet of human expression, influenced by culture and driven by human creative impulse’. Every day I use photography as an outlet of human expression via Snapchat. So, by using Snapchat, we are all immersing ourselves in the arts every day. In this way, Instagram is the artistic movement of our generation. Each profile is painstakingly designed to portray an individual view of our culture. We only deem certain pictures ‘Instagram-worthy’ – God forbid someone should see you as unartistic and shallow. Every time you add a filter, you’re an artist, taking part in the great artistic movement of the decade. Jennifer Hopps
22.tvhighlights
Monday 3 November 2014
The Courier
TV Editors: Helen Daly and Ellie McLaren Online TV Editor: Rebecca Dooley
I can’t even In this week’s I Can’t Even, Lauren Hickin shares her love for Orphan Black star Tatiana Maslany
I
first became aware of the sheer brilliance that is Tatiana Maslany in 2010. It was Christmastime, and having seen a new BBC version of The Nativity advertised, I duly tuned in, due in no small part to the fact that Andrew Buchan, previously seen in Garrow’s Law, was playing Joseph. However, despite his performance being impressive, the star turn in The Nativity was unquestionably Tatiana’s Mary. The role of Mary is an extremely challenging one for an actress to pull off successfully – goodness is among the most difficult traits to portray truthfully. Her Mary was unobtrusively graceful and sweet, but also capable of being funny, blunt and profound as she faced the disbelief and prejudice of her community and rejection by the man she loves. A lesser actress would have played up to the clichés, but in playing a truthful young woman Maslany made a big impression on me. In the next couple of years the only other role I saw her play was a minor but pivotal role in the hit-and-miss adaptation of Ken Follett’s World Without End. Little did I know that my admiration of her abilities as an actress would be propelled to Olympian heights with my subscription to Netflix last year, and my subsequent discovery of Orphan Black.
Geordie Shore (UK), Monday, 9pm
I
t’s the moment many of us have been waiting for since series eight wrapped up in early September. Geordie Shore is back and we’re buzzing. With all nine cast members returning the ninth season promises to be ‘bigger and better than ever before’! It’s hard to believe that eight series’ have passed since the MTV show first broadcast back in May 2011, and with viewer ratings having nearly doubled since then, it’s amazing to see how far the show has come. Watching our favourite Geordies through their best, worst and most intoxicated moments has provided endless entertainment for all of us, and with celebrities such as Cheryl and R-Patz confessing to be huge fans of the show, there are countless reasons as to why Geordie Shore’s popularity has reached international status. Love it or
hate it, no one can dispute the fact that the unique nature of Geordie Shore has got everyone talking. Whatever it is you love about these Geordies: be it their unique dialect, outlandish behaviour, or wild nights out on the toon, you’re bound to be excited at the prospect of what the upcoming season will bring. With the promise of more tashing on, getting mortal and banging birds the impending
“Love it or hate it, no one can dispute the fact that the unique nature of Geordie Shore has got everyone talking”
drama is about to reach new heights. Firstly, the girls have ditched the late-night doner kebabs for supplied catering to suit their healthy lifestyles. Secondly, the casts current relationship statuses stand as: Holly, “single” and maintaining her classy persona; Vicky, newly blonde and in the early days of a relationship; Aaron and Marnie -
mutual feelings remain; James, still as crazy as ever for Kate; Charlotte – still with Mitch; and as for lads Gary, Scott and Kyle, they (as always) are ready to pull. Seems simple enough, but as any real fan will know, things are guaranteed to change as Charlotte hints that ‘not even Mystic f**king Meg can predict what’s going to happen’. Speaking of Charlotte, perhaps the greatest gossip surrounding the Geordie Shore hype are the rumors of renewed romance between her and Gaz; particularly exciting for anyone who found the pair’s past on-again-off-again relationship as interesting as I did. Also, the series’ latest edition introduces the reign of ‘Queen V’, which is bound to destroy the house harmony seen in MTV’s Sneak Peak after the gang’s first night out on the toon at Madame Koos. With this royal status placing Vicky as team leader under the instruction of Anna, it’s only a matter of time before arguments will erupt as, in the words of Kyle, ‘World War III is about to be unleashed’ and I for one cannot wait. Liz Rosling
“It is hard to imagine any other actress succeeding in creating ten distinctive and compelling characters ”
It is hard to attempt to do justice to the achievement that is Maslany’s contribution to this show. In this pacy and intriguing piece of speculative drama, protagonist Sarah Manning discovers that she is one of several clones created by a mysterious corporation. Maslany plays not only Manning, a London-born wanderer, but her many assorted clones, including (but not limited to) a suburban housewife, a psychotic killer, a super-smart biologist and a trans man. Complicating matters even further, the clones often imitate one another for the purposes of the plot, beginning with Sarah impersonating Beth Childs, a clone who is in the police force. It is hard to imagine any other actress succeeding in creating ten distinctive and compelling characters, who each have not only different accents and outward styling but their own individual physicality and demeanour. If not for their shared facial features, these characters might be different actresses – a considerable achievement which, incredibly, was snubbed by the Emmy Awards and lost out to Robin Wright at the Golden Globes (honestly, between that travesty and Diane Keaton’s tribute to Woody Allen, I was grinding my teeth so hard I could have started a percussion section). Not only does Maslany convincingly portray all these characters, but she has openly acknowledged the debt she owes to hardworking stand-in, Kathryn Alexandre. Alexandre has perhaps one of the most complex stand-in jobs in television, playing every single clone for the purposes of Maslany being able to physically interact with another character she plays (which happens often). I suspect that there are few other high-profile actresses who would speak at length about a behind-the-scenes colleague, whose performances are edited out and replaced with Maslany’s in post-production, in her own interviews. Talented, versatile, genuine… I can’t even!
The Simpsons
Doctor Who
Sky1, Sunday, 6pm.
D
on’t get me wrong, I love The Simpsons as much as the next person, but after a quarter of a century, I can’t help but feel that Matt Groening and co. should retire with the knowledge that between 1987 and 2003, they gave us some of the most quotable and memorable episodes ever. Post-2003, I’m a bit of a snob and just don’t laugh or remember as much as I used to, so it’s inevitable that in 2014, watching The Simpsons’ 26th season, I feel a little bit sad. So far we’ve had the highly anticipated death of an “iconic” character, a character that turned out to be not so iconic after all, and one that no one has really cared about since ‘Like Father, Like Clown’ in 1991. We’ve also had one of those hit or miss Marge episodes, in which she undertakes a new venture as a Subway-esque franchise owner and ropes in her family to help out. Had this episode aired in the 90’s, I’m confident that all sorts of hilarity would have ensued, but as is the risk with any later episode centered around Marge, it goes nowhere, and your 20 minutes are up before anything has really happened. It’s like some sort of addiction, I keep going back to it, and I know it’s bad but I just can’t stop. Later in the season, we have a Futurama crossover to look forward to, a musical episode and Willem Defoe as a guest star in yet another new substitute teacher episode, but no matter who they cast as a teacher, he’ll never be Mr. Bergstrom.
Emily Thompson
Modern Family
BBC1, Saturday, 8:15pm.
T
ime flies when you’re having fun. It only seemed like yesterday that we were gathered around the TV with ‘Deep Breath’s waiting for the grand debut of a certain Peter Capaldi in the role of the 12th Doctor. It’s safe to say that, along with the majority of fans, I was utterly and completely impressed with the incarnation I saw in front of me. Fast forward ten weeks, and here I sit, anxiously waiting for the two-part finale with bated breath. Series eight has not only given us Daleks, dinosaurs and Danny Pink, but has delivered a frustratingly intriguing lady of the name ‘Missy’. Cropping up during a large number of the episodes, Missy, claiming to be in Heaven has been taking care of those who perish whilst the Doctor and Clara carry on with their adventures. Fan theories have been running wild, with some hoping for the return of River Song in a Victorian guise, while others have been linking Clara to the curious Missy. Needless to say, the episode looks great; the Doctor is finally set to meet the lady who’s been keeping all of his acquaintances company in the afterlife, while Clara has gone all dark and mean on us. All of the questions we have been asking ourselves for the past few weeks (‘Who is Missy?’, ‘why is Danny so shady?’ and ‘why is the Doctor so grumpy?’) will all be answered, I’m sure, in the only way Doctor Who knows best; the most explosive, emotive and downright exciting way possible. Series eight has been one of the strongest opening series for a new Doctor in Who-history. Let’s hope the finale lives up to the expectations set throughout the past ten weeks. I have faith. Helen Daly
Sky1, Monday, 8pm.
M
odern Family follows three connected families living in Los Angeles and their exploits, and has the kind of universal appeal of sitcoms like Friends, and How I Met Your Mother, largely due to its cast of regular, hilarious actors. A lot has changed over the last five years for the Dunphy family, the Pritchett-Delgados and the Tucker-Pritchetts. Whilst avoiding spoilers, the Pritchett-Delgado clan have grown and a recent wedding will have brought a tear to a great many eyes. The Dunphy kids are almost all grown up, and the adorable appeal of chubby ladies-man Manny and scrappy mischievous Luke is growing out. Somehow, however, the writers have maintained the quick wit and family dynamic that originally drew viewers to the show, and which helped to build the light-hearted sitcom a cult following. True, it is not an unpredictable TV show. Pretty quickly, any Modern Family fan will tell you, you start to see a pattern emerging in each episode. Phil will do something daft, and Claire will frighten him, and he’ll try to hide it. Gloria will be devastatingly sexy, and Manny will be adorable. Jay will be a grumpy old man with a heart of gold, and his family will all struggle to express their feelings. The kids will play tricks on each other. It’ll be funny. But there’s something comforting about television that we know and love, isn’t there? The familiarity of an old telly friend is not something to be sniffed at. Season six will be a welcome return of a TV show that never fails to make me smile. Leila Nashef
The Courier
featurestv.23
Monday 3 November 2014
thecourieronline.co.uk/tv c2.tv@ncl.ac.uk | @courier_tv
-XVW RQH PRUH QHW¿ [ Obsessed with Orange is the New Black? Stuck on Sherlock? Our writers iden- tify the stages of becoming addicted to a TV show. Fandoms at the ready Stage two: Attachment
TV addiction. Is it healthy? Is it preventable? More importantly, how does it start? As you stroll along with your friends, you hear them passionately discussing this week’s episode of a TV show, one you haven’t heard of before. They go on and on about how they can’t believe she did this or he said that; you feel lost and left astray, with nothing to contribute to the conversation. Since the show has been hyped up so much, and through the encouragement of your peers, you decide to watch the very first episode. While watching, you’re not really concentrating. Names are matched to faces as the story unfolds, but nothing grabs you- at least, not yet. So the first episode was pretty good, but nothing to get too excited over. Then you decide to watch another episode in the hope of getting really into it. What could go wrong? And so the addiction begins…
You decide to watch the show again and you’re bored anyway, so you slouch on the couch, sipping your cinnamon flavoured coffee. After the episode, you find yourself sitting straight, legs drawn up against your body, staring at the screen, thinking “Why is this episode over already?” For some reason this episode was way better than you thought it would be. You definitely want to see another episode. Maybe your friends who were talking excitedly about the show the other day were right. To be fair, there was this one really good actor you can’t quite place, what was his name again? You open your laptop, start googling and end up reading reviews praising the show’s cool plot and the amazing cast. That’s it, when you do something, you do it right, so you tell yourself you’re going to watch the first season, give it a proper chance. The intro starts playing and you notice for the first time how catchy the tune is. Here we go! Lisa Schmechel
Max Barker
Stage three: Binge and Denial You’re in the binge stage now. You can’t seem to get enough of this TV show and you realise just what your friends were talking about. You’re whizzing through the episodes so fast that even waiting the seven seconds before Netflix automatically loads the next episode is too long. You NEED it. Now. Soon you’re hibernating in your room, lectures, what lectures? You can’t help it, the last episode ended on such a good cliffhanger that you somehow rationalised missing uni to find out what happens. When people accuse you of being obsessed you scoff, they don’t know anything, you just haven’t got anything better to do. But actually you’re in denial. You find yourself working everyday tasks whilst watching the show; getting dressed, watching the show, cooking food, watching the show. The only reason you’ve likely not gotten a bath whilst watching it on your laptop is the possibility you might get water on it and then what would you do. You ignore friend’s pleas for you to go out, you don’t need friends, you have the show. Rebecca Dooley
Illustrations by Nina Hamer
Stage one: Indifference
6WDJH ¿ YH )DQGRP Stage four: Withdrawal This is it, cold turkey. For whatever reason whether it be you can’t afford Netflix, your internet’s not working, or you literally can’t avoid that essay any longer- you’ve been cut off. Suddenly all you can think about it the show. Every. Single. Moment. Your life feels empty now, before you were living vicariously through the show. You find yourself rushing home, naively forgetting you can’t watch it and the crushing disappointment when you remember is almost too much pain. If someone speaks of the show around you, you find yourself mentally making their brain explode because if they spoil anything you won’t be responsible for your actions. But this is all perfectly normal behaviour of course… perfectly normal. Rebecca Dooley
You break down, you can’t deny or hold yourself back anymore from the show. You’re proud to be part of the fandom, proud to obsessively tweet the fit main actor because a) you love the show, and b) who cares? The only sense of friendship and camaraderie you feel now is with other die-hard fans of the show, because they understand your love and obsession. You share your favourite moments with them because when you “casually” drop the show into conversation with you real-life friends they don’t understand your reference. But who cares about them, or that shitty mark you got on your essay, you just made a spectacular gif of that awesome moment in the last episode. Oh yeah. Rebecca Dooley
TV Rewind Jack Parker takes a look at some of the best bad TV from bygone eras
C
ast your mind back to 2004, it feels like only yesterday doesn’t it? Well, it’s not, it was ten whole years ago. God, that makes me feel old. Most of us were still young and fresh-faced, much like the two stars of reality TV show The Simple Life. The then relatively unknown Paris Hilton and her best friend Nicole Richie, arrived onto our screens on E4 in 2004. The premise of the show was very simple: two young, wealthy socialites and heiresses to millions were sent out into the ‘real’ world to perform ‘real’ jobs and live like the ‘average’ American. It doesn’t sound too difficult, right? What followed was to be one of the most shamelessly addictive shows of the noughties. The two couldn’t make a burger or groom a dog to save their life, and it was hilarious. The show was a runaway hit on both sides of the pond. Not only did it show Hilton and Richie to be absolutely feckless when it came to being ‘normal’, it made us worry for the sanity of those business owners and families who agreed to take them on. Seriously, in some episodes Paris Hilton was left alone for the week looking after someone’s kids. Just think how badly that could have ended. Luckily, the worst she could do was flood the house with bubbles by putting a whole box of washing powder in with the laundry or letting the kids play on their own in the front garden.
“Forget Kim Kardashian and Co, this troublesome-twosome were the original reality TV stars of the noughties. They were the first to become famous ‘for being famous’” She was at least rather inventive in some of her tasks, and showed us some essential life hacks that we could all use. For example, if you attach your mop to the back of your Segway, you could easily clean the laminate floors in no time. Genius! If Paris was the inventor, Nicole was the rebel. She was the one who often just broke the rules, or just refused to do anything. In one episode, when the two were working at a dog groomers, she pointblankly refused to clean some of the bigger dogs and managed to let one loose. She was the one who got into trouble, whilst Paris somehow managed to evade punishment. These girls managed to address everyone as ‘bitches’ and somehow get away with it, like the Middle Americans they were put with were just too shocked by what they said and did to their cherished homes and businesses. Forget Kim Kardashian and Co, this troublesome-twosome were the original reality TV stars of the noughties. They were the first to become famous ‘for being famous’. Hilton has since gone on to become an international socialite, criminal and currently a celebrity ‘DJ’, loved the world over just for saying ‘that’s hot’. Nicole however, is still a socialite, but I’m not sure what she’s up to recently, she just sort of disappeared. What hasn’t disappeared, however, is my love for this guilty-pleasure of a show, one that I still love to watch and watch again. Nicole and Paris, we salute you.
24.filmfeatures features
Monday 3 November 2014
The Courier
Film Editors: Rosie Rosie Bellini & David Leighton Online Editor: Lucas Lucas Fothergill
War: what is it good for?
Pleasure Island
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I
t’s hard to make a case for a movie I know is dragging the genre of musical films down the toilet, particularly when musicals in film don’t have the greatest reputation to begin with. But – despite being universally hated – I have to confess, I like Burlesque. In fact, Burlesque is one of my favourite awful movies. It sits happily in my collection between the remake of Miracle on 34th Street and Paranormal Activity, the crowning jewel in my shelf of awfulness. But what exactly is it that makes it so incredibly painful to endure? For starters, the plot line is a tired cliché: disadvantaged youth moves to big city to pursue dreams of being an [insert creative profession here]. Add a token romance and a financial barrier to overcome and you’ve got a box office hit, and then two weeks later it’s in the bargain bin. And then the rubbish bin. And then hell. It is Burlesque’s ‘romance’, however, which is the crowning turd in the water pipe. Despite Ali’s (the protagonist) love interest Jack betraying her at every turn, she remains besotted and forgives his numerous transgressions… whilst the film happily and unironically declares their love one for the ages. Though this blatant disregard for Ali’s otherwise strong and unyielding character shouldn’t be surprising, considering the film’s blatant disregard for everything else, it infuriates me that she doesn’t slap him and end the film contentedly single. I shudder through some scenes which I can only assume were edited together by a four year old who had just discovered Windows Movie Maker, and dance numbers cut awkwardly to intimate dialogue, with powerful Aguilerian vocals drowning out any attempt at character development. If the film can’t be bothered to listen to its own characters, then I’m not sure why I should be invested in them. Despite all this, I can’t help but root for Ali. I look at her in envy when she argues her way into a job, I applaud when she auditions without being invited and I punch the air Breakfast Club style when the music stops in her performance and she starts singing. I love the scenes where she is rude, offensive, and vulgar because she persists until she gets what she wants. This is why I love Burlesque, because I start gaining confidence watching Ali succeed. While lead females in better films accept defeat, Ali soldiers on, cheerfully oblivious to the word no. Act confident, it works. It might not be the moral the filmmakers were aiming for, but it’s the one I’m taking with me.
Becky Harrison
he epic war film is no stranger to audiences nowadays – just glance at the list of up and coming movies of 2014/2015 and you’ll see at least five movies based in and around war settings. But why do we find war narratives so fascinating, and is it time they took their leave of the big screen to make way for new stories? Undeniably, the war film has several key qualities that make it attractive to directors, actors and audiences alike. There’s a certain thrill of excitement when we see a character being pushed to their emotional and physical extremes in an apocalyptic setting, often where our hero must cling to their own moral fibre to avoid being dragged into the pits of fiery damnation and despair around them. More than this, films like The Hurt Locker and Saving Private Ryan are unavoidable masterpieces of cinema that use war to showcase loyalty, bravery, passion and honour, all in the space of two and a bit hours. What could there be for an audience to complain about? Well, it’s not only the sheer number of war films appearing on screen that could cause us to roll our eyes and tut, but also a questioning of their ethics. We are, after all,
living in a post-war world that is still recovering from past trauma and, indeed, is engaging in further violent conflict even now. And there’s something a little disconcerting about watching this trauma and violence being utilised for our entertainment on the big screen while, in countries not so far away, people are dealing with the realities of warfare in their everyday lives. Inglourious Basterds, for example, inserts its own fictional events into a real historical timeline and makes use of violence in a semi-comical, macho-fuelled sense whereby it crafts heroes out of bloodthirsty avengers and makes everyone’s favourite character the suave, essentially evil Nazi villain. Even the Iron Man series could be seen to exploit current fears of terrorism for its narratives, in which the expected enemy’s ethnicity is often uncomfortably stereotypical – however, we should note that these films are of a very different flavour to philosophically and emotionally charged war films such as Apocalypse Now. Now Such films run the risk of over-simplifying their heroes and villains to increase drama in ways that could be considered culturally insensitive. War, after all, is an integral part of our social and political history, and most importantly it is never simple.
Particularly in the present age when the internet offers us a wealth of information on global issues, it is perhaps problematic to present war as having one side of goodies and one side of baddies. Even
“When we’ve a wealth of information on global issues, it’s problematic to present war as goodies versus baddies”
extremely eloquent and applauded depictions of modern war such as Zero Dark Thirty (fantastically, from the same director as The Hurt Locker) have launched critics into discussions of whether or not the film promotes torture interrogation. However, the emotional investment found in a war film done right should not be ignored. Films such as My Boy Jack bring to light elements of the war narrative which have only recently been addressed – the stories of the families of soldiers, on the communities that are left behind, out of sight of the main action. We have a right to remember the events that defined us as nations, and to continue to question and examine the effects and experiences of such events through a variety of types of media, film included. War films, then, surely do still deserve a place in our cinemas today. However, the manner in which they appear on screen seems to be integral to our relationship to the very term ‘war’; it is a sensitive term and perhaps one that cannot ethically be reduced to superficial narratives. We are constantly exposed to scenes of violence, both real and fictional, and increasingly it seems the most important concern around war films today is the extent to which we are desensitised to their imagery. And with films like The Mighty Eighth and American Sniper on the horizon, let’s hope it’s remembered that these events were a reality, not a fantasy.
Michael Bay-ne of my life
On the week that his Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles reboot is released, we take a peek at the ‘ol’ glory- hole’ loving lout’s back catalogue and consider if he’s worth a critical reevaluation (hint: no he isn’t)
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ayhem is back. Whilst being justly slammed by critics, the Bay-produced Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles flick has smashed box office’s across the globe and reinforced Mike’s reputation as a money-spinning studio dream. So why all the hate? He gives us what we want right? Explosions, things blowing up, spontaneous combustion- what more could we ask for? Well, for starters, how about brains, intelligence, and anything that doesn’t end with KABOOOOOM. Exhibit A: Who Needs Art When You Can Blow Shit Up? Michael loves taking franchises, shoving a stick of dynamite up their arse and seeing what happens. I’ll admit; I enjoyed the first few Transformers films- the computer generated sight of thirty foot robots taking chunks out of each other was something of a novelty. But then my balls dropped. Bay has found a money-spinning formula that will see him continue to make studios a lot of money by making very bad films. If I’m going to spend almost three hours watching a film, I don’t want to see Megatron make a furious return, again, and assemble the Decepticons to take over the Earth, again. Show me something else, Michael. Show me something that at least attempts to be
more than a shameless advert for Victoria’s Secret and Hasbro. Dawn of the Planet of the Apes and Star Trek were a lesson in how the holy grail of commercial and critical success can be achieved by creating CGI that serves the story, and not vice versa. Take a hint. Exhibit B: A Nasty Piece of Work One scene in the new TMNT movie sees Megan Fox leaning helplessly out of a van window as she careers noisily towards probable peril. Her arse, of course, makes a tasteless, leer-inducing appearance that hits all the wrong notes. If you hire one of the most famous women on the planet, ask her
to ‘act’ alongside a bunch of oversized turtles then people will flock to see your ‘film’. Bay prays on immature, puerile characteristics to create brainless blockbusters that are a shocking example of money-orientated trash. Just imagine if the $210 million production budget for Transformers 4 was snatched from Michael’s hands and given to a group of genre-pushing, art-appreciating filmmakers. The results could be fabulous. Exhibit C: Misunderstood Mike? Should we be concerned that Bay continues to be incredibly successful? Are his films harmless, innocent pieces of entertainment for the masses? For anyone interested in following human, artistic values - Michael Bay’s insistence on flooding his films with ridiculous product placements, empty casts and mindless cinematic tropes represent a nasty stain on popular culture. Who will be the next studio or director to jump on the box-office bandwagon, spurting out sequel after sequel of exploitative, passive rubbish that makes no attempt to extend the artistic aesthetics of cinema? Pity the true filmmakers and their struggle to tell dramatic, innovative stories in a sea of commercialised bollocks. Films should invent, imagine and inspire. Autobots roll out; find Michael Bay and hide him in a place where can never touch a camera again. Save the human race (again). David Naylor
The Courier
reviewsfilm.25
Monday 3 November 2014
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“I fart in your general direction. Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries” - Monty Python & The Holy Grail (1975)
Fury (15)
The good, the bad and the ugly: Stellan 6NDUVJDUG
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he sheer brutality of war can never be underestimated. It’s us versus them. Metal on metal. Will it be your life, or mine? The best thing about David Ayer’s tank thriller is its terrifying ability to firmly plant you in the character’s muddy shoes. What would you do if Brad Pitt’s imperious ‘Wardaddy’ was screaming for you to shoot a German prisoner? How would you, as Logan Lerman’s rookie tank-driver, cope with wiping your predecessor’s splattered remains off of your new home? It’s these kind of incomprehensible decisions that make war films a frightening genre, and Fury’s sheer humane brutality makes for a harrowing watch. Soldiers don’t create wars; yet they must fight to an end and then keep on fighting. The desperate reality of war is mercilessly thrown your way as director David Ayer, a former Navy sailor, mercilessly drags burning bodies, crushed corpses, and crumpled towns into the lives of five U.S. tank operators. These are the closing moments of the European theatre of war - the bedraggled crew have quite literally been through the mire; their assistant gunner’s remains adorn the walls of their tank and newcomer Norman (Lerman) must adapt to life on the front. The developing relationship between Norm and Staff Sgt. Don ‘Wardaddy’ Collier is central to Fury’s humanistic journey through the trials
of war. The camaraderie and conflict between the five main characters is one of Fury’s highlights; they fight, laugh, shoot and reload in a painfully human struggle portrayed with effortless vivacity by Pitt, Lerman and a supporting cast that includes a powerfully down-to-earth Jon Bernthal. It’s impossible not to adore Pitt as a patriarchal, dominant maniac that refuses to let his men give anything less than necessary. In true Aldo Raine style, ‘Wardaddy’ is a furious SS-hating commander that leads his crew to scorched earth and back a thousand times over - there are no easy ways out in war. Whilst Fury may give a vivid lesson in the depth of human emotion, it fails to reach the grippingly grounded levels a la Saving Private Ryan. The in-
sane and excessive action provides a glorious spectacle that regrettably has too many ‘I’ll just stand here leisurely with my bazooka until I get shot’ moments. Fury features a nation on the edge of defeat: rockets, bullets, and human limbs seem to fly out from all angles with a miserable level of success that is epitomised by a ridiculously blockbuster climax leaving Fury a few doses of realism away from being a great film. A tank-load of guns, rockets, and exploding humans mixes with a harrowing yet preposterous depiction of war, death, and painful glory. Not one for those looking for an enchanting first date. More like this: A Bridge Too Far (1977) David Naylor
The Judge (15)
The Boxtrolls (PG)
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (12A)
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he newest children’s franchise for Michael Bay to have gotten his hands on is none other than TMNT. But, as usual, the film ha nothing in common with the original series. The story follows April O’Neal (Megan Fox), a journalism graduate and an aspiring investigative reporter who tries to look into the mysterious Foot Clan – a clear excuse for the protagonist to do the most senseless things, such as following criminals without a camera or getting herself into trouble. For the first fifteen minutes of the film there is no sign of any turtle. By this time, the audience gets the impression that this film is partly about Megan Fox trying to prove that she can act. Also the audience might notice the plot is full of conveniences: April being the daughter of a long-deceased scientist who had been experimenting on (surprise!) turtles and a rat. Even more handily, as a future journalist, little April shot a lot of films in her dad’s laboratory meaning that years later she can quickly unravel the story of the city’s “secret vigilantes”. The first half of the film is boring. The second mostly contains fast-moving action that somehow manages to be more dull and mind-numbing than the first half. The film has way too many funny jokes and puns that, quite simply, fall flat. There are a couple of serious, more moralizing lines with a ‘meaningful message’ that seems both forced and out of place. To top it off, Bay’s versions of the Turtles and Splinter are simply creepy. TMNT’s only redeeming quality is that it’s quite well made. If you stop following the plot and stop caring about the actors it’s all right to watch, but it does fail miserably at measuring up to the old franchise. If you’re a fan of animated Teenage Ninja Mutant Turtles, I’d advise you don’t watch it. Don’t expect anything more than the most mindless and unimpressive form of entertainment. More like this: Transformers (2007) Anna Jastrzembska
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or those who are fans of Iron Man, here’s another chance to watch your favourite actor, this time as the lawyer, Hank Palmer. Robert Downey Jr. once again plays the role of the genius as Hank Palmer; a man talented at nearly everything with an eccentric personality that resembles Sherlock Holmes. Whilst I do not doubt that Downey is a man of talent (who would doubt a man paid £25–40m per movie?) the clever, narcissistic, hot-tempered Holmes-esque role is becoming something of a bore. Aside from Downey, it is worth paying attention to Robert Duvall, famous for his portrayal of Tom Hagen in The Godfather. Despite his advancing years, age has done nothing to detract from his acting talents – he’s still on good form. The story follows the ambitious lawyer returning to his hometown on account of the loss of his mother and has to remain when he discovers his father, a respected and experienced judge, has been charged with murder. Harsh, proud and stubborn, his father becomes Hank’s most difficult and uncontrollable client. The Judge might be clichéd as a courtroom drama but it still raises powerful, eternal subjects like father-son relationships. Director David Dobkin creates a the heart-rending story about family values, with the message that it’s never too late to reunite with those who love you or to change for the sake of your family. In his interview Downey said that The Judge is “a 21stcentury version of classic film-making”. This film might be interesting to an older audience, for those who love courtroom dramas and of course, Downey fans. Unfortunately I am not any of these things and, as a result, two and half hours was just too long.
More like this: Big Fish (2003) Valentina Egorova
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tellan Skarsgard: the father of the beautiful Scandinavian giant Alexander Skarsgard (for those of you who don’t recognise the name, he’s Eric from True Blood). Perhaps a somewhat lesser known name, Skarsgard boasts acting credits in both independent films such as those by Lars Von Trier as well as blockbusters like The Avengers.
The good I was apprehensive before I watched Lars Von Trier’s controversial double-volume Nymphomaniac, but the risk paid off. The film follows the life of Joe (Charlotte Gainsbourg) and her sex addiction, or as she prefers to phrase it, nymphomania. Cleverly arranged into a metanarrative as Joe relates her experiences to Seligman (Skarsgard), an apparently reclusive intellectual who comes across Joe battered and bruised in an alleyway. He constantly finds parallels between Joe’s experiences and increasingly miscellaneous subjects, such as musical compositions, fly fishing and numerous seemingly unrelated topics. Granted, it sounds like a bit of an odd concept for a film and I expected it to be packed full of graphic sex scenes, which I suppose it is. Despite this the narrative takes precedence over these and provides a powerful representation of someone living her life outside society’s expectations. If you’re looking for something a bit outthere, this is without a doubt one of Skarsgard’s finest performances.
The bad
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or the young at heart, Boxtrolls is a refreshing alternative to flawless Disney-esque animation, if you can watch stop-motion films without getting nightmares about Coraline. Having also produced the likes of Corpse Bride and Paranorman, Laika Entertainment’s Boxtrolls takes an uncanny spin on beloved children’s novel Here Be Monsters!. The film follows the story of Eggs (Isaac Hampstead), a boy ‘stolen’ from his father and raised by a group of adorable box-clad trolls living under the town of Cheesebridge. A fantastical montage of bug eating, music playing and junk stealing, shows that Eggs’ life seems like every young boy’s dream. However, growing up underground isn’t all fun and games, and the evil Archibald Snatcher (Ben Kingsley) is quickly recruited to rid the city of the boxtrolls and their numbers begin to dwindle. When Eggs’ parental figure Fish is captured, he teams up with Winnie (Maleficent’s Elle Fanning) to solve the mystery of the missing boxtrolls and to overthrow Snatcher’s plot. Boxtrolls, like many children’s films, takes place in a world where the ignorance of adults is celebrated by all but the protagonists, which unfortunately does begin to wear a bit thin. Whilst having a prestigious member of society fall for a cross-dressing villain can often be nothing short of hilarious; its inclusion Boxtrolls is almost as unnecessary The film tries its best to gain the amusement of the audience in the most farcical way possible whilst attempting to slap on a ‘moral of the story’ at the end like a bad shade of lipstick. However those who enjoy that kind of humour and don’t mind the flaws will enjoy every minute. For anyone else the incredible animation is a huge redeeming factor. If you’re looking for original animation but not an engaging plot with three dimensional characters, this is probably the film for you. More like this: ParaNorman (2012) Lois Hall
I’m not quite sure what possessed Skarsgard to take part in the sequel to the equally dire – if not worse – The Da Vinci Code. Given this assertion, Skarsgard isn’t particularly bad in this film - it’s just not good. Having read the books I may be somewhat biased, but Ron Howard’s film version just doesn’t quite hook you in from the beginning like the novel. Book aside though, it’s slow, flawed and full of plot holes and entirely unfeasible situations. Overall it’s average at best.
The ugly It was tough to decide whether Nymphomaniac or The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo was the ugliest, but I think that in terms of character, David Fincher’s adaptation of Stieg Larsson’s bestselling novel edged it. Rooney Mara’s portrayal of the goth detective (grittier than the Noel Fielding/Russell Brand type) Lisbeth Salander elevates this film from typical psychological thriller to provocative masterpiece. Skarsgard plays Martin Vanger, the mysterious brother of the missing Harriet, undoubtedly delivering the finest performance of the supporting cast. Rhian Hunter
26.filmfeature
Monday 3 November 2014
The Courier
In space, Nolan can hear you scream A speculative look on who’s who in the director’s latest visual symphony from Film Editors David Leighton, Rosie Bellini and Lucas Fothergill
Matthew McConaughey Cooper With the McConnaisance complete and the Oscar in the bag, what’s next for Captain Leaning? A car commercial. Yup. He did a car commercial. But he’s also taken the lead role in the biggest piece of event cinema this year, so that’s something. Cooper will be at the head of the odyssey into the wormhole, whilst also having to deal with the issue of maybe not seeing his young kids ever again. It’s tough being an automobile flogging Oscar winner.
Jessica Chastain Murph
Playing the grown-up version of Cooper’s daughter, it’s safe to assume that McConaughey ends up spending quite a lot of time in that ol’ wormhole of his. A situation we can relate to there, folks. Based on the promo material leading up to now, expect Chastain to spend most of her screen time looking dismayed in cornfields. Jessica loves cornfields.
Michael Caine “Helpful Old Science Guy”
David Oyelowo Principal
Collaborating for the sixth time now, Caine is clearly quite fond of Mr Nolan. Caine’s role in this film seems to be (get this) a reliable old man. Nolan clearly wants to take Michael out of his comfort zone…but at least this time Caine knows some things about science. That’s new. AND we can thank him for spelling out the synopsis in the trailers for us. That was helpful. So now we know something about Interstellar.. Thanks, Michael.
Meet Principal, another pilot. Is that his character’s real name? Really? There’s something going on here. David’s pilot can’t be called that. Nolan’s got something up his sleeve. He must be. He just has to. WHO THE FUCK IS EVERYONE? God, this super-secretive trademark-Nolan run up to the film is so exhausting. I love it that way… but… can’t we know something? Please?
Musical score Interstellar is a film which is likely to show the very best, and the very worst, of Nolan’s filmmaking endeavours. However for visuals and score, Nolan is – and probably always will be – the guy. The Dark Knight featured a distinct absence of sound and it was an absolutely terrific decision, grounding the film in a dark and gritty (not yet clichéd) universe and when things got really tense, a gentle high pitched whine invaded your ears and grew slowly louder, increasing your ‘shit is going down ometer’ to levels off the chart. Inception featured a cracking use of horns which (whilst deafening audiences from Middlesbrough to Stoke) really upped the ante when shit got real. This is why I am looking forward to Interstellar and why, if there are any flaws, I will be more than happy to overlook them, because it will look and sound bloody amazing.
Visual effects Nolan’s use of visual cinematography is legendary. From The Prestige’s use of colour palette, to the now (somewhat) clichéd ‘dark grittiness’ of his Batman trilogy, complete with Christian Bale’s cement mixer mouth-piece that sounds like someone threw gravel in a tumble dryer. Interstellar is no exception and, so far, looks to be a visual masterpiece if nothing else. Nolan’s view on his use of visual effects within his movies is also a little bit inspiring, “There are two different goals in a visual effects movie. One is to fool the audience into seeing something seamless, and that’s how I try to use it. The other is to impress the audience with the amount of money spent on the spectacle of the visual effect, and that, I have no interest in”.
Anne Hathaway Brand
Shunning the skin-tight leather for a hulking spacesuit, Hathaway is set to embark upon her second collaboration with director Christopher Nolan. Other than being another pilot on the spacecraft, we really don’t know anything about Brand. You see, that’s the problem with this piece. Like everyone else who hasn’t seen it yet, unfortunately we know almost nothing about Interstellar. So…yeah. Deal with it.
Matt Damon Matt Damon
MATT DAMON! The Bourne-again star was rumoured, reported and then confirmed to Interstellar many months ago. Unfortunately since then, nothing has been said of Matt Damon’s Star-Wars: Episode VII levels of secrecy role in Interstellar. Once again, all we have is guesswork as to exactly what he’s doing in the film. BUT HE IS IN THERE! Trust us.
The Courier
featuremusic.27
Monday 3 November 2014
I own a record label, and so can you Why are people still starting record labels? Can any Joe Schmo do it? Music Editors Jamie Shepherd and Dominique Daly met Chris Smith, a Newcastle graduate who’s done just that
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ith every iconic artist, there usually comes an iconic record label behind them. A good example of this is Sun Records, the label that gave to the world Elvis Presley, Johnny Cash, and Roy Orbison. Formed in Memphis, Tennessee by the inimitable Sam Phillips in 1952, Sun was one of the first institutions to bring the music of African-Americans to the attention of white audiences. It revolutionised pop music as we now know and understand it today. This paved the way for the rise of Detroit’s Motown which became known as a genre in itself. Across the pond, here in the UK, some of the most renowned record labels of the 1960s were formed by the bands themselves as a means of exerting complete artistic control of their music. The Beatles had Apple, The Rolling Stones started the eponymous Rolling Stones, and Elton John had The Rocket Recording Company - but none of these had any real commercial success or longevity. It wasn’t until the rise of punk that any British indie record labels of note came to fruition.
“It wasn’t until the rise of punk that any British indie record labels of note came into fruition” London’s Rough Trade, started by shop owner Geoff Travis, promoted the burgeoning careers of Stiff Little Fingers, Buzzcocks, and The Smiths but more recently represented artists such as The Strokes, Warpaint, and the infamous Libertines. Up North, in grey and rainy Manchester, Tony Wilson’s Factory produced Joy Division, New Order and Happy Mondays and created an entire aesthetic in itself, with each album release equating to works of art themselves. In the age of online self-distribution, where an artist can share their music to a vast potential audience, for a nominal cost, you might wonder “why” or “how should I set up a label” ? We spoke to someone who did just this. We sat down with Chris Smith, an ex-Newcastle University Student who formed his own music label, Trellis Records. Trellis was officially launched
“I saw it as a chance to make my mark without having to suck up to anyone”
“Setting up a label is as easy as declaring that you’ve set up a label” in April of this year and we wanted to know a little bit more about this. So Chris, why did you actually start your own record label? I started the label because I’m young and impatient to get ahead in the music industry. I saw it as a chance to make my mark without having to suck up to anyone in a business that usually favours ‘who you know’ over ‘what you know. What’s the ethos you want to promote with Trellis? It started out as a means to promote those North East bands and artists who would otherwise be left behind. Having lived in the region for four years before moving to London, I was disappointed to discover a disconnect between the North East’s music scene - which I love - and the London-centric music industry - which I also love. I wanted to close the gap between the two and spread the word about these incredibly talented North East bands and artists who were being unfairly ignored in my opinion. However, I knew that in the long run the label would branch out to encompass music from outside the region. Ultimately, it’s all about music that I believe is really, really special. What’s been the biggest moments since starting the label? The label’s been going for six months now and it’s been a blast. Both single releases (Mat Hunsley - ‘Au Contraire’ and Brooke Bentham - ‘We’ll Be Ghosts’) have been supported by some of the biggest music blogs in the country, and the latter ended up doing pretty well in the iTunes charts. It’s fair to say that both will go on to become household names down the line given the interest they’re currently attracting. I’ve taken loads of positives from the experience thus far, and things are looking good with regards to the future of the label. I can’t name names just yet but we’ve just signed an Icelandic artist whose music is absolutely stunning, and we’ll also be working on Mat’s next single after Christmas. There’s some other cool projects in the pipeline too, but they’re yet to be confirmed. How easy was the whole process of starting a record label? Setting up a label is pretty much as easy as declaring that you’ve set up a label. But making a success of it is another thing entirely - you need to have a diverse skill set to cope in an industry that throws up a lot of different challenges. Although the hard-
Mat Hunsley, one of Chris Smith’s signings at Trellis and also a Newcastle student est part for me was coming up with a name for the label! Apart from that, the hardest thing is attracting bands and artists to your label in the first few months. Most people start by releasing their friend’s music, which is exactly what I did - however, I wouldn’t have done so unless I truly believed in them and their music. Fortunately, I knew Mat was a special talent. Of course, setting up a label, isn’t as easy as just saying you’ve got your own music label. Once you’ve actually set up the label you have to keep thinking about the direction your label is progressing. Chris stressed to us the importance of having a clear vision in mind. What direction is Trellis going to take? It’s worth noting that anyone thinking of setting up a label shouldn’t expect to make much money (if any) from it, at least in the first few years. It’s something you do for love, not money. Most successful labels diversify and go into publishing, gig promotion in order to front the costs associated with run-
ning a label. We’ve opted to go into management, and are looking to grow our associated roster over the coming months. After speaking to Chris, it was refreshing to meet someone with a clear idea of what they want to achieve and still hold modest intentions. Chris is under no illusions that he’s going to be the next Alan McGee or, dare I say it, Simon Cowell, but he knows what he wants from Trellis. I get the impression from speaking to Chris that this endeavour is purely a labour of love. Chris has put a lot of his time and energy into this project but I get the impression that this has never been a chore. I guess the main thing you need if you’re going to start your own record label is the certainty that this is actually something that you want to do. A record label is more than just a vanity project. It requires dedication and hard work. If you feel like you can see this through, there’s probably nothing actually stopping you except for yourself. So what are you music aficionados waiting for?
5 magic tips for starting your own label
1 3
Actually tell people that you’ve got a label - do you think Ivo Watts-Russell kept 4AD a secret when he started it? Of course he didn’t. Get out there and shout it from the bell tower.
Chris Smith, Newcastle alumnus and music biz supremo
2
Find artists to sign to your label - how’re you supposed to record anything if nobody’s signed to you? You need bands to record dummy. That’s why they call it a ‘record’ label.
5
Make sure that you’ve got a good name for the label - would anybody take your child seriously if you called it Blue Tulip Tallulah Donkey Tuxedo? Of course they wouldn’t. After all, isn’t your record label supposed to be your baby?
4
Work out where you’re going - it’s all very well saying you have your own label but if you can’t explain anything about it, well aren’t you going to look like a dingus.
Don’t automatically expect a lot of money overnight - unless by some bizarre twist of fate the first artist you sign is the next Arctic Monkeys, don’t be surprised if you find yourself ringing your parents for a tenner to see you over until the next week.
“ u
28.music
Monday 3 November 2014
The Courier
Music Editors: Jamie Shepherd, Dominique Daly and Chris Addison
Deep House Hunk
Live: Sam Smith at O2 Academy
Joel Leaver and Emily Croakes checked out falsetto-piped serial collaborator Sam Smith Welcome back to club corner. This week our aving just added four MOBO awards to ence, he made the decision to add an Earth, Wind tribute to the legendary Whitney Houston. Having his growing collection of achievements, & Fire cover to the gig to celebrate their presence. performed a haunting cover of ‘How Will I Know’ intrepid club cavalier Sam Smith is one of the UK’s finest In an attempt to liven up his somewhat ballad on a radio show in June, Smith undoubtedly knew Max Palmer-Greaves young talents. After gaining initial recognition focused setlist, Smith taught the audience a little the audience would go wild for the chance to hear prepares us for the best as the vocalist on Disclosure’s ‘Latch’, Sam’s de- routine, which soon saw them dancing to his more it live themselves. Sitting centre stage with lights beaming through the room, Sam’s beautiful vocals house, future garage, and but album, In The Lonely Hour, sold over 300,000 upbeat tracks such as ‘Money On My Mind’. in the UK alone. His blend of pop, soul The highlight of the show was, by far, Smith’s matched the song perfectly and gave it a contemgrime nights coming up copies and a bit of jazz, has also made him a success in porary feel. The set concluded, conventionally, “Sitting centre stage with this week. Listen up, rude America, selling out Madison Square Garden in with an encore, ending the night with the powerful minutes. His electrifying vocals, combined with ‘Stay With Me’, leaving the audience wanting more. boys and girls lights beaming through the
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Eton Messy 7th November @ Digital The Eton Messy crew founded their YouTube channel in 2011 but a lot has changed since then. It was started simply to share house and garage tracks so that their mates could find and use them at house parties. Songs from Disclosure, Bondax and De$ignated were staples, complete with suitable pictures of babes smoking or nice waterfalls. The smooth bass driven sound they promoted was a far cry from what was deemed ‘cool’ in the summer of 2011 when EDM was all the rage with acts like Alesso and Avicii choking everyone to death with their four to the floor, side chained white noise anthems. These days they have their own record label and Blonde (the headline act) actually includes one of the Eton Messy crew. Eton Messy nights have previously sold out venues like Cosmic and World Headquarters with ease. When I saw them at WHQ they dropped ‘Free From Desire’ by Gala and everyone went suitably mental. It’s a night that doesn’t take itself too seriously where everyone is out to listen to some bangers and jump around. Listen to: ‘Shakedown’ – At Night (Blonde Remix) Real Nice 6th November @ World HQ (Mista Presents a Real Nice Suprise) This would be my choice for the week: Real Nice promise a set of groovy house and disco numbers that are sure to get you moving. They’ve been given support by the likes of Pete Tong and Solomun, an act that is still very much on the up and probably one to see sooner rather than later. Listen to their track ‘Oooo!’ and admire their eighties disco inspired aesthetic, you won’t be able to resist their Bristolian charm. Listen to: ‘Oooo!’ – Real Nice Kahn and Neek 8th November @ World HQ (Tantrik/Exit present) This is the more interesting choice for the week. If you’re a grime connoisseur or if, like me, you’ve only ever accidentally wandered into grime nights and then realized you have a secret love of disgusting bass lines and “gully riddims”, this night is going to be quality. A strictly dubplate set from Bristol’s duo who have been tearing up dancefloors all over the UK. Freshers go and try something new! Even if it’s not your jam you can spend an evening skanking, finger gunning and drinking Oranjeboom. Listen to: ‘B-Line Fi Blow’ – Smith and Mighty You Need To Hear This; Rat & Co Rat & Co are a chilled out instrumental band from Australia. Annoyingly this makes it hard to get hold of their music in hard copy, as they don’t have a particularly big following in the UK. That said if you go on YouTube and watch the videos for their latest singles ‘Vocal Insanity’ and ‘Samurai’ you’ll be shocked that they don’t. Hip-hop beats, guitars drenched in reverb and their use of sampling make them a really interesting listen and the aesthetic of their videos is just fantastic. You can stream their album Binary on Soundcloud. Listen to: ‘Vocal Insanity’ – Rat & Co For more expert knowledge on Newcastle’s electronic and clubbing scene, be sure to tune into Electronic Blanket on NSR every Sunday evening.
that adorable smile, explain just why a number of his shows on this UK tour sold out too. With family connections to Newcastle, it was evident that this show at the O2 Academy was going to be special from the outset. With the seats filled and the stalls jam packed, fans of all ages prepared themselves for a night of class entertainment, from one of the nation’s biggest names of the now. Opening the show was Californian Tori Kelly, who first found fame with covers on YouTube. With guitar in hand, and no backing vocalists in sight, Kelly quickly captivated the audience with her chilling vocals and personal songs. As her set progressed, the groovy haired performer risked losing the audience’s attention but redeemed herself with an impressive acoustic cover of Michael Jackson’s ‘P.Y.T (Pretty Young Thing)’. Already featured on Professor Green’s ‘Lullaby’, Kelly is clearly a name to watch out for. A dramatic introduction eventually welcomed this year’s BRITs Critics’ Choice Award winner to the stage, as the audience met him with rapturous applause. Appearing nervous at first, and with some awkwardness, Smith soon found himself with the help of his sassy backing vocalists. Taking us through a number of fan favourites from the album, including ‘I’m Not The Only One’ and ‘Restart’, Smith flawlessly delivered song after song. With his family proudly watching from the audi-
room, Smith’s beautiful vocals matched the song perfectly and gave it a contemporary feel”
Smith’s humbleness and appreciation towards the fans shone through during the show and continued outside afterwards when he signed autographs and took selfies with a number of loyal supporters. He is such a raw talent, and the show itself deserves a solid 5 out of 5 stars.
Citadel Memnon Sa
Soused Scott Walker and Sunn O)))
Big Fat Lie Nicole Scherzinger
A
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tmosphere, tension and intensity. There is little in the way of stopping the enigmatic Memnon Sa when it comes to these three things. They create beautiful, atmospheric compositions of exciting psych pulsations and Citadel is a powerful showcase of their skills. It opens with the title track, the shortest by far, with echoing clangs, darkly melodic guitar lines and deep strings that could have been ripped straight from a Lord of the Rings soundtrack. It lets us know instantly that we are in for a very interesting ride. As the creeping drums of ‘Megalith’ enter and with the help of a melody that verges on disturbing, it becomes more and more intense until it is no longer bearable. The release comes in the form of a wave of distortion layering the quiet, the storm after the calm. Through the distorted chasms of ‘Hecca Emem Ra’ and the eerie ‘Eshkigal’ this album is obviously designed to unsettle. The only safety and solace we get is in the depths of ‘Titan’s Sleep’. We are literally dragged through a world that feels both old and new, a huge world that we must experience all in the space of forty five minutes and, as the apocalyptic yet hopeful final track ‘Kali Yuga’ shows, it is not necessarily a pleasant one but exciting none the less. Citadel as a whole, while it is quite a challenging album to get through, almost feels like a pilgrimage. It takes us on a sonic adventure, toys with us, makes us understand and then confuses us, but, at the end of it all, the result is almost purging, enlightening even. Good things aren’t always easy after all, especially not when listening to the bible of medieval funeral psych. Liam Keeble
he reason Soused works is because Sunn O)))’s trademark sound - loud, dissonant and intimidating - builds on a foundation of minimalism. Just like any of Walker’s experimental output, this music is calculated to achieve the maximum effect; nothing feels superfluous. Opening track ‘Brando’ teases listeners with an occasional conventional hard rock riff - but after repeating a couple of times it vanishes into the mix and the monolithic guitar tones take the lead again. This relentless tension underlies the whole album, and provides the perfect backdrop for Walker’s unmistakable baritone vocals. And when he isn’t singing, he’s shouting, to equally powerful effect, as on the driving, aggressive ‘Bull’. Even here the album doesn’t cease to undermine expectations - at its halfway point the song collapses into pure ambience consisting of little more than guitar drones. ‘Fetish’, the high point of Soused, goes to some odd places, featuring bursts of electronic and industrial noise interrupting the band’s low rumble it injects some unpredictability into things without sabotaging the mood. Closer ‘Lullaby’ uses quiet, rattling percussion, building to a sudden all-consuming burst of synthesisers, guitars and screaming strings accompanied by Walker’s disquieting vocal performance the song’s ‘chorus’. Only on this album could a song called ‘Lullaby’ sound this surreal and horrifying. Soused is a collaboration between artists so unapologetically difficult that it could never be a casual listen. Established fans of Scott Walker’s experimental song-writing or Sunn O)))’s droning anti-metal, however, will find the two perfect for each other.
Jack Caulfield
s the lead singer of the Pussycat Dolls, Nicole Scherzinger proved that she had what it takes to be a star in her own right. Her quirky personality and powerful vocals allowed her to outshine the other members of her group, and so when she went solo, it probably seemed like she was set for stardom. Unfortunately her music hasn’t reached the level of her Pussycat Dolls days, and in listening to Big Fat Lie, it’s not hard to understand why. The record starts off promisingly with lead cut ‘Your Love’, with the blend of clattering, house flecked beats, fuzzy synths and a breezy pop hook making for an irresistible summer jam. After this the record just descends into an awkward mess of songs that try to be cool but which completely miss the mark. The sultry groove of ‘Electric Blue’ would work better for another artist, but Scherzinger just manages to make something meant to be vaguely sexy seem completely lifeless. Likewise the feistiness of ‘Girl With a Diamond Heart’ is marred by Scherzinger’s complete lack of conviction. Having been executive produced by The Dream and Trickey Stewart (the guys behind Rihanna’s ‘Umbrella’ and Beyonce’s ‘Single Ladies’), this should be, by all accounts, a dream record. In reality, the production just feels like an exercise in Top 40 radio fodder, designed for the lowest common denominator of music consumers. Only final track ‘Run’ shows any real promise. A stripped back ballad, ‘Run’ seems to be the only point of true sincerity, and shows that Scherzinger could be styled as a great balladeer in the future. Scherzinger has stated that she scrapped five albums before releasing this record. If this is what she is actually putting out, I shudder to think how bad those scrapped records were. Chris Addison
The Courier
music.29
Monday 3 November 2014
thecourieronline.co.uk/music c2.music@ncl.ac.uk | @courier_music
Stand up and scream: a chat with Asking Alexandria
Hard-rock heavyweights Asking Alexandria are currently on a headline tour of Europe and the UK. Iqra Choudhry caught up with the band’s bassist Sam Bettley to talk about life as part of one of the UK’s biggest alternative bands The Courier: First off - how would you describe your sound to people who don’t know who Asking Alexandria are? Sam Bettley: Our sound? Bloody hell. It’s quite a modern sort-of heavy rock’n’roll band; we don’t like to be put into a certain genre. We’ve got a lot of older influences, and some newer sounds too. The latest record that you guys released, From Death to Destiny – you’re still releasing singles from it, and it’s different from your older sound. Would you say it’s more mature? Yeah, every album that we release has been different, from Stand Up and Scream to Reckless and Relentless (the band’s first two albums) was a huge jump too. The next one’ll be different too. When’re you guys bringing new stuff out? Well, we’ve been writing this summer, it’ll be mid next year, album wise, but there’ll be stuff before then. We’ve got a DVD on its way – we filmed in Brixton a couple of years ago, and its finally back – it looks amazing and that’ll be out soon. How’s tour going? This is your third UK date? Yeah, we’ve just done mainland Europe. We were out there for a couple of weeks before we came to England. It’s been great, y’know, biggest one we’ve ever done, most dates we’ve ever done. So, yeah, it’s been cool. Do you guys have any plans for the Halloween show? We usually have a laugh with it. But it’s Ben (Bruce, Lead guitarist)’s birthday on Halloween, so whenever we dress up, or do anything stupid, he hates it because he’s like ‘all my life I’ve had people ignore my birthday’ so we’re gonna try do something for Ben. Everyone could dress up as Ben. [I jokingly suggest that they should get the audience to print off masks of Ben’s face and come dressed as him - if this happened on Halloween, it was my idea] If we could
actually get that to happen, it’d be quite cool – that’s your idea. You did a US tour just before this as well? We did Mayhem Festival – we did that with Avenged Sevenfold, Korn, Trivium, Suicide Silence, it was awesome.
“One Direction’ll roll in on the bus and they’ll probably all need a shit”
How are UK crowds different to American crowds? I love coming home. Because we’ve not done as many tours, I feel like people get way more excited – the shows have got so much more energy, because we only ever come here twice a year, whereas in America we tour a considerable amount more. People are excited, they don’t know when they’re next gonna see us, but we’re gonna try to change that, try come over here a bit more often. The last time you toured the UK, you were supporting Bullet For My Valentine in December 2013 on an arena tour. Is it nice to get back to smaller venues? I love playing arenas, but it’s nice to be playing our shows, y’know? I always like headlining, but it was great to go out with Bullet. It was a completely different experience. These smaller shows are cool; I wouldn’t complain if we were doing arenas, though. Who would you want to tour with, on your next UK run? And where would you like to tour in the future? I’d love to do another tour with the Avenged Sevenfold guys – those guys are awesome, one of my favourite bands. They’re crazy – we’ve toured with them a few times, in America, and Australia.
Talking Heads
Oh, what became of the local lads?
This week George Suddaby gives us the lowdown on his local favourites, Hull’s Chasing Athena
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laying in a similar style to Mallory Knox and You Me At Six, Hull rockers Chasing Athena are certainly a band to look out for in the future. With recent airings on BBC Introducing, the band look to propel themselves to stardom. Formed in 2012, Chasing Athena comprise of Ian Berry (vocals/guitar), Luke Daniel (guitar), Daryl Colinson (drums) and James Dearing (bass), and recently recorded their debut self-titled album on Hull’s Fruit Trade Records run by Mikey Scott. On initially hearing their album, I was amazed at the sound which the band produced. The blend of guitar rock and powerful vocals drew me into wanting to hear more and makes this band one of the brightest talents on Hull’s music scene. I first saw this band a few years ago when they supported Futures at Fruit in Hull. They immediately caught my attention with their refined sound and energetic live performance, making me initially surprised when I found out that they were an amateur band on the local scene. The next time I saw this band was at the Scunthorpe Rock Open when they played in the same heat as a band I was in at the time. They had slightly developed their sound, substituting Ian Berry’s acoustic guitar with an all electric setup. They also enhanced their stage presence to be even more professional, now verging on a ‘perfect’ sound live. Their bassist, James Dearing, was the most energetic on stage, seemingly giving 110% for the duration of the concert. Chasing Athena recently played in local festivals: Humber Street Sesh (one of the biggest one-day festivals in the area), Freedom Festival, and Trinity Festival. All of these performances would help to increase the band’s following to push them on to bigger and better things. They are a band which I will be keeping my eyes and ears on for the foreseeable future, hoping that one day they will be performing in the biggest venues and festivals.
With the news that S Club are back, we set our writers Finlay Pelling and George Suddaby the task of exploring whether a reunion like this is ever for the fans or whether S Club are only in it for the money
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he news that S Club 7 are reuniting is, for me, great news. I remember the times when I would smile at their music, something which I still do to this day! They were well and truly the first band that I could say I was a fan of. I even watched their television programmes, and looked forward to each new episode being released. Despite the sentimental value of such a reunion taking place, there is always the view that the groups are doing it solely for a quick pay-day before going back to living their multi-millionaire lifestyles. They usually release one (often terrible) record which doesn’t reach anywhere near the heights in the charts that their previous releases did. Afterwards they go laughing to the bank as they have relied on a frenzied buying spree from their devoted fans who have longed for the day that their old favoured artists release new music.
“Afterwards they go laughing to the bank as they have relied on a frenzied buying spree”
It is fair to say that they are not always a ‘flop’. When Take That came back onto the scene in 2005 and were anything but a failure. Their releases sold very well, and, for somebody who isn’t normally into that style of music, their music was actually pretty good. Whether they came back for the fans, nobody will ever know. What is certain, however, is that they had a few very big pay days meaning that, ultimately, they have been the big winners.
Although some groups and bands sometimes hit success during their second active period, the likelihood is that there will be a major failure. When this happens the fans lose out again as they go through the pain which they previously endured the first time the band split. Are reunions actually for the fans? I don’t think so. George Suddaby
I
n the light of S Club 7’s recent reformation, it is quite clear that certain comebacks take place solely to replenish the musicians’ dwindling bank balances and to repay their insurmountable gambling debts. However, I would like to argue that in many cases, reformation is a tribute to the fans that have supported their retirement funds. If we look at The Rolling Stones’ recent revival, it is clear to see that Jagger et al are not simply in it to support Keith Richard’s heroin addiction. If they were, Jagger would not have returned to vocal training and Richards would not have had memory lessons to help him remember the songs. Having witnessed their 2013 Glastonbury set, it was clear that this was a band looking to give something back to the fans and even my sceptical father said they sounded as good as in their prime.
They’re really great dudes. We’re just about to go to Russia, at the end of this run – we’ve never been there, and it’s gonna be huge. I’m really excited. What are your bests and worsts of touring life? The best thing about touring life is the fact that every day’s the weekend, you literally hang with your best mates, just partying every day, really. There’s no rules, apart from ‘get on stage and play’ and even that’s fun. The worst? Not being able to shit on the bus. But that’s quite a standard thing. You don’t ever do it. You’ll see any band – say One Direction, and they’ll roll in on a bus, looking all glamorous; they probably all need a shit. What are your favourite songs to play live? I love playing ‘Moving On’ – we’ve just started playing that on our last tour, at Mayhem festival. I love playing that – it’s a bit softer. A lot of people tend to lose their gig virginity at University – what was your first gig? Well, we do meet and greets before shows, and a few people have been saying, “Oh you guys are my first show”. I’ve been going to shows since I was 9 years old, so I was going to local shows in York. I don’t even remember my first proper show, just the scene. Final question: do you have any advice for bands starting out, or trying to make it in America? Well, we didn’t follow any rules, just went and did it our own way. It’s the best way of keeping fresh. You can very easily fall into the trap of doing what everybody else’s doing, and it’s hard to stick out that way. I think the reason that we broke America is because we had no idea of what we were doing. We just went over there and did it ourselves; it’s always good to stand out, turn some heads, good or bad, you need to make a name for yourself. Just get yourself out there and make a scene.
“Certain comebacks take place solely to replenish the musicians’ dwindling bank balances”
Furthermore, Led Zeppelin overcame a mountain of internal issues between Page and Plant to reform for the Celebration Day shows in 2007, but surely they would have done a nationwide tour if they were only in it for the money. Pink Floyd is very much in the same category. With Gilmour and Waters constantly at odds with each other, they have only reunited for charity shows (not for personal gain) and now, with their new album, to commemorate their keyboardist, Rick Wright, who died in 2008. Reformation is not always a negative concept related to swindling fans into buying a half-produced album, but in many cases is a testament to those that have supported them and would love to see them perform one last time. I mean, aren’t we all praying to be able to watch Oasis smash Glastonbury one last time this year? Finlay Pelling
The Courier
gaming.31
Monday 3 November 2014
thecourieronline.co.uk @Courier_Gaming
Gaming Editors: Sophie Baines and Ben Tyrer
Are user reviews useless reviews?
James McCoull examines the toxic wasteland of user reviews, and questions if reviewing the games is best left to the professionals
G
ames journalism is in a sorry state. That’s why you’re so lucky to have a panel of dedicated, honest young journalists uncorrupted by advertising revenue or, in fact, wages of any kind! Sadly, the rest of the gaming world is not so blessed, and often the search for unbiased journalism ends only in a sea of 10/10s that have not been earned with talent, but bought with cold hard cash. How fortunate, then, that it’s the 21st century and everyone has a platform to share their opinions. Metacritic, Steam and Amazon all have tools to support real-user feedback and allow prospective buyers to see what others just like them think before committing their money to it.
“It’s nice to imagine that everyone will be honest and unbiased without the influence of bribes, but money’s not the only thing that can corrupt”
But is that as worthwhile as it seems? It’s nice to imagine that everyone will be honest and unbiased without the influence of bribes, but money’s not the only thing that can corrupt. Sites like 4chan and Reddit have been known to organise ‘review bombs,’ flooding the game with negative press and possibly ruining its reputation permanently. There’s certainly problems with both the professional and amateur reviews, and as with all things, the solution lies in balance. Corrupt or otherwise, journalists (for the most part) are professionals: they have the job they have because they’re qualified for it, and they’re good at it. As much as anyone can say what’s good or bad about something, the degree of insight and
App Review: Made in Chelsea: The Game
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’m not ashamed to say it claimed three whole days of my life two weeks before my undergraduate dissertation. I am talking about the Made in Chelsea app game I innocently downloaded during a point of procrastination when I knew I should really be in the library proof reading the most important piece of work I have ever done to date. Alas, I was sat in my bedroom hooked on this game. Creating my own character, based on myself obviously, I was hanging out with the cast in Chelsea and being set constant tasks. At least I was working to some kind of deadline I guess - even if it wasn’t my university one. The thing that made this game so enticing is the music. The soundtrack from the series was constantly playing while I worked my way up the social ladder in this game. I quickly became obsessive about reaching the top of this seemingly never-ending ladder with the help from an animated Stevie - as if I could love him anymore than I did already – guiding me around the Chelsea set. Three days later and I’m the most popular girl in the Royal Borough of Chelsea, having experienced a fair few dramatic encounters along the way. By this point I’d convinced myself I actually knew the cast and would probably get along with them. On the other (much more serious) hand I found myself at the end of an animated game with an unfinished dissertation and very little time to do anything about it. Kudos, Channel 4 with your marvellous app game, I was well and truly sucked in. Kathy Davidson
knowledge on the subject has a big impact on the and en masse they can assemble a broad, detailed validity of the review, and it simply isn’t a job that picture of what the game feels like to play. So while anyone with a keyboard can do to the same stand- professional critics bring a level of knowledge and ard. The amount of work and thought expertise to their reviews, the amateur reviewers that sincere, expert publications can tell you what it really feels like to like EDGE magazine put into play it. their reviews set them “Users offer a pure opinion far above the common crowd, and their which no professional can” knowledge on the subject is invaluIs one more valuable in giving you able than the other? a precise idea of I wouldn’t say so, the game’s quality. because getting the C o n v e r s e l y, balance right is user reviews ofthe key. Assemble fer something a portrait of the that profesgame from every sionals angle you can ne ver manage, then can: pure, look at the finsubjective ished picture opinion. and decide Without any if it’s worth motives bey o u r yond telling m o n e y. other people T h a t ’s what they w h a t think, the my advice average user would be. isn’t influenced in the slightest. They can’t be paid off; they can’t be debated; they can’t be refused. Their opinion is pure and simple, Gabe Newell (pictured) can’t be happy with the state of Steam user reviews
Reload: Pokemon Emerald
David Leighton gets lost in a nostalgia haze, as he remembers the trials and tribulations of Pokemon
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still remember the day my parents drove to Curry’s to get a new kettle, only to return with Pokémon Yellow and a brand new Gameboy Colour. I nearly wee’d, honestly. In this I am not alone; the franchise has been selling for nearly twenty years on various Gameboy platforms and is still going strong. It’s a game with hundreds of hours’ gameplay that you can take pretty much anywhere. A game with a strong environmental message (in the 90s!) which was, paradoxically, preoccupied with trapping local wildlife in tiny plastic balls and throwing them at local kids, gladiator style. Lucky me, because I get to take a few hours out, sit down, and crack on with one of my favourites, Emerald… so cry havoc and let slip the Houndooms of war!
“A brilliant way to waste hours of time you should be spending on your dissertation”
Whilst not a particularly old edition to the Pokémon franchise – coming just after the true classics, but just before they ran out of colours to name them after – Emerald is easily my third favourite, after Yellow and Crystal. Now usually I’d start going into gameplay, difficulty, cut scenes etc. at this point but anyone who has ever played Pokémon most likely knows all that off by heart already. Instead, I’m going to point out a few things that I think make this particular edition of the popular
franchise of animal enslavement so blimmin’ good. Emerald was new enough to have a whole new range of Pokémon, without being new enough for Nintendo to run out of ideas and as a result came before the generations where 80% of Pokémon looked like bin-bags with googly eyes. This meant interesting new techniques, double battles, and Metagross – the most badass of them all. Next up is the Battle Frontier: Emerald featured one of the most expansive Frontiers of the entire series, with hours and hours of extra gameplay; a brilliant edition not only for the added runtime but also because it was bloody hard and upping the difficulty near endgame always earns points in my book. Running shoes, whilst admittedly present in Ruby & Sapphire too, were a welcome addition to Emerald (and every core game thereafter) because, Christ, it was bloody slow without them. The amount of times I rage-quit Pokémon Yellow because walking around Dark Cave at 1mph whilst being coated with the guano of Zubastards was ridiculous. Nobody wants a Zubat. Finally, the whole Grounon/Kyogre/Rayquaza showdown was simply spectacular. As a fifteen year old encountering that for the first time was simply monumental, I’m sure I had to go show my mum. So there you have it, Pokémon Emerald, a scorcher of a game and a brilliant way to waste hours of time you should be spending on your dissertation. Lord help me.
5 Licensed Legends Michael Hicks shares his favourite games from franchises Batman: Arkham Asylum Many believed Batman would be the easiest of superheroes to make the transfer to video games. He’s an expert at hand-to-hand combat, has a huge array of awesome gadgets, and an awesome mask. Many initially saw it as a cash-in following on from the success of Christopher Nolan’s Batman films, but we gamers were never happier to be wrong. Released back in 2009 and developed by London-based Rocksteady Studios; Batman: Arkham Asylum provided gamers with an experience they wouldn’t forget. Experienced Batman author Paul Dini scripted this game, gracing Arkham Asylum with one of the best Batman stories to date and, coupled with fantastic gameplay, it is definitely not one to miss.
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time A classic game if there ever was one. Developed by Konami (yes, the Metal Gear guys), this game is a port of the arcade Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles game for Nintendo’s Super Nintendo console and was released in 1992. Turtles in Time is a beat ‘em up type of game, where up to four players can take control of everyone’s favourite pizza-eating warrior turtles as they beat the stuffing out of the Shredder’s minions across more time periods than your average series of Doctor Who, in a quest to recover the stolen Statue of Liberty and get home. This game is absolutely bonkers and so much fun.
Goldeneye I might as well get the obligatory entry out of the way. Released way back in 1997 for Nintendo’s shiny new N64 console and developed by Rare. Based on the bloody awful Bond film of the same name; Goldeneye has been credited as the progenitor of the entire FPS genre. The game allowed players to take the reigns of Bond as they play through levels based on scenes in the film (including that great one with the tank), and a final boss that’s tougher than a steel reinforced, concrete coated diamond. The main legacy of this game is its amazing multiplayer mode. Except for Oddjob.
Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic I love Star Wars, and before you ask, yes I was disappointed by the lack of a good Star Wars game on the Wii (tell me that a lightsaber wasn’t the first thing that came to mind when you first starting waving a Wii remote around), but at least we have this game. Developed by Bioware and released for the original Xbox in 2003, Knights of the Old Republic is a role-playing game set in the Star Wars universe four thousand years before the events of Phantom Menace, this RPG was critically acclaimed and remains one of Bioware’s best.
Telltale’s The Walking Dead Telltale’s The Walking Dead is a different beast from most games, as there is little in the way of gameplay and is more of a graphic adventure with a strong focus on character development and story. As you can infer from the title; The Walking Dead takes place in the same universe as the comic. The game follows Lee Everett, a convicted murderer in charge of a bunch of survivors caught in the middle of the zombie apocalypse. The story of the game is affected by both the dialogue choices you make as well as the outcome of quick-time events; which can result in certain characters changing their disposition around Lee, or even dying outright.
32.science&technology
Monday 3 November 2014
The Courier
Science  Editors:  Laura  Staniforth  and  Penny  Polson Online  Science  Editor:  Jack  Marley
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irework displays: whether it is Bonfire Night or New Year’s Eve, they always attract masses of people ready to stand long periods of time in the cold just to watch the colourful explosions. They have a long and mystical history. Over a thousand years ago a Chinese monk named Li Tian stuffed a piece of bamboo with gunpowder and threw it into fire. It produced a huge noise so he could scare away the ghosts. Even nowadays the fireworks remain pretty much the same as their prototype; the science behind them is quite simple yet seems magical. To understand how aerial fireworks work, it’s worth looking first into firecrackers and sparklersboth belonging to the proud firework family. Firecrackers consist of black powder (gunpowder) or flash powder squeezed in a paper tube with a fuse. Black powder contains charcoal, sulphur and potassium nitrate. The firecracker’s black powder might contain also aluminium to brighten the explosion. Sparklers, also known as “snowball sparklers�, are a bit different. They burn for up to a minute and produce a very bright, showery light. Sparklers consist of a fuel (charcoal and sulphur), an oxidizer (the most popular one is potassium nitrate), iron
Image: Jeff_Golden
or steel powder and a binder (sugar or starch). In correct proportions, the mixture of chemicals will slowly burn instead of exploding. The compounds mixed with water create a muck that can be dipped on a wire or poured into a tube. When it dries, a sparkler is ready.
Colourful  chemicals Firework displays dazzle viewers with explosions of every colour. But how are they made?
“Over a thousand years ago a Chinese monk named Li Tian stuffed a piece of bamboo with gunpowder and threw it into fire�
A simple aerial firework is a shell with four main parts: a container, which is usually pasted paper and string formed into a cylinder; stars, which are pea-sized balls of a sparkler composition; a busting charge, which is basically a firecracker at the centre of the shell; and a fuse, which provides a time delay. This shell is launched from a mortar. A mortar is usually a short, steel pipe with a lifting charge (black powder). When the lifting charge explodes into a pipe, it creates launching energy and lights the shell’s fuse. The fuse burns while the shell rises to a correct altitude and then ignites the bursting charge. When the shell explodes, the stars thrown in all directions, creating a huge sphere of sparkling light. More complex aerial fireworks have what is called multibreak shells- they would burst in a couple of phases. Multibreak shells consist either of multiple shells put into a bigger shell, or have multiple sections without using additional shells. Different sections are ignited by different fuses and the bursting of one section ignites the next. Special explosives called break charges are added to break the sections. Some shells might contain whistles that explode outward with stars.
Metal salts are ionic compounds; when they ignite they emit light. When heated, their electrons are excited and jump to a higher energy level. After this dissipates it releases the energy as light. The whole display depends mostly on stars and their composition and arrangement. Colours are made by burning metals and salts. Sodium (including sodium chloride, or table salt) creates yellow fire, lithium red, copper green, and potassium purple. Sparkles are created by addition of aluminium, iron, steel, zinc or magnesium dust. Depending on the temperature, the metal flakes would only heat up and shine brightly or actually burn.
“Firecrackers consist of black powder (gunpowder) or flash powder squeezed in a paper tube with a fuse�
The pattern of the firework display depends on the arrangement of the star pellets inside the shell. It is as simple as outlining a specific figure out of them, then placing explosive charges inside to blow them outward into a large figure. For example, the most common, circular aerial display, is made when the star pellets are organized in a circle with the black powder inside the circle. That works for any specific figure. Now, with the spell of the fireworks’ ‘magic’ broken, it is time to put on a coat and see the nearest display.
Metal salts that are commonly used in firework displays include: strontium carbonate (red), calcium chloride (orange), sodium nitrate (yellow), barium chloride (green), and copper chloride (blue). Purple fireworks are made from a mix of the strontium and copper compounds. The colours produced correspond to different wavelengths of light. Violet and blue come from 400-500 nanometres, yellows and greens are 500-600, and oranges and reds are 600-700 nanometres. Laura Staniforth
I  got  that  autumn  feeling
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Why  do  leaves  change  colour?
eaves changing colours always looks really awesome, but it’s actually a very intricate way of trees trying to preserve energy during the winter months. You’re probably familiar with the process of photosynthesis (the process of which plants use water, carbon dioxide and light energy to produce sugars and oxygen). This process hinges on a green pigment called chlorophyll, but leaves contain other pigments too, such as the yellow, orange and brown group of pigments called carotenoids, and the red and purple anthrocyanins. The reason leaves are green is because there is a far higher amount of chlorophyll. During the winter months, deciduous trees lose their leaves, as the shorter sunlight hours mean it is no longer efficient to use all that energy preserving large, green leaves. The tree diverts resources away from the leaves and instead uses them to keep the core of the tree alive. This causes the green chlorophyll to break down, giving the other pigments in the leaves a brief time to shine before they fall off.
Why  all  the  indoor  spiders?
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t’s because of the most wonderful time of the year: spider season! Surprisingly, spiders don’t particularly like houses; there’s very little food or moisture and most houses are usually too clean for a spider’s tastes. But there are also fewer predators compared to the big scary outside world (unless you like eating spiders, you weirdo), so some species have become quite used to houses and live almost exclusively inside. However, this still doesn’t explain the sheer number of spiders inside in September. The main reason there’s an influx of spiders in September is that it is the time of year where most spiders reach maturity. The spiders that find their way into your house are almost certainly adventurous males of mainly outdoors species who errantly would go up there looking for a mate. Unfortunately for male spiders, attracting a mate is an extreme sport of sorts, as it is not uncommon for female spi ders to eat males during the act.
A
Why  do  animals  hibernate?
nimals (much like students) wish to conserve as much energy as possible, especially during the cold, winter months when there is a lack of food, so many animals get around this harsh time of year by hibernating. Hibernating is useful as the inactivity greatly slows down the metabolism of the animal, greatly reducing their body temperature for possibly months at a time. Generally, animals will gorge
themselves on food before hibernating and then survive solely on the excess energy burned from fat stores. You’d be forgiven for thinking that hibernation is just one long nap for Mr. Black Bear over there, but hibernation is actually very straining on an animal, as months of survival based on energy sourced entirely from fat can be very exhausting for an animal, with many species going straight back to sleep to offset the stress of hibernation.
“Surprisingly, spiders don’t particularly like houses; there’s very little food or moisture and most houses are usually too clean for a spider’s tastes�
Illustration: Becky Irvine
The Courier
technology&science.33
Monday 3 November 2014
thecourieronline.co.uk/science c2.science@ncl.ac.uk | @courier_science
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Penny Polson DQG Laura Staniforth FKHFN RXW :LOOLDP 6KDWQHU¶V WZHHWV WR PDMRU VSDFH RUJDQLVDWLRQV On a warm August day, the NASA twitter page received an unexpected tweet...
So they replied as any true science nerd would:
This pleased Captain Kirk.
But wait, that’s not all. He turned his steely gaze to the European Space Agency (ESA):
The Captain hadn’t heard of the probe, and requested more information. He received this reply:
Live long and prosper Mr. Shatner.
Logging your call to The secret is out end deforestation Victoria Armstrong
*RW DQ ROG SKRQH" Kassie Hopewell H[SORUHV WKH XVHV RI VPDUW WHFKQRORJ\ DV OLVWHQLQJ GHYLFHV LQ WKH UDLQIRUHVW f you’re in possession of an old smart phone “The USA alone discards 150 and are in anyway concerned with the tree felling crisis in our rainforests, then you million phones every year, so may be a fan of this amazing new way to recycle projects such as these need your old phone. Engineer and physicist Topher White has set up an organisation which allows more press so that these you to both recycle and save our ever decreasing phones are sent to good use” rainforests.
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The Rainforest Connection (RC), founded in early 2013, uses recycled smart phones to create electronic detectors for trees. These detect the rumblings of chainsaws cutting through tree trunks from up to a kilometre away. The devices are solar powered, and can work twenty four hours a day, meaning that these give constant protection to their surrounding trees. When the smartphone detects a working chainsaw, the software installed into the adapted phones dials an enforcement number, and the local authorities working in conjunction with this scheme will be notified and turn up to enforce the felling laws of the area. A plan first proposed by White’s partner Dave Grenell was to introduce this to wider areas. Large expanses of trees will be surrounded by these devices, so that the trees inside the encircling smartphones are protected without extensive use of phones. The USA alone discards 150 million phones every year, so projects such as these need more press so that these phones are sent to good use, and not to landfill.
The project has so far been trialled in rainforest locations in Sumatra with positive results, however even with positive results there are still threats to our rainforests. The RC is currently working on introducing devices into three more rainforest reserves in Indonesia, the Amazon and Africa. The company is so dedicated to its aim of protecting the rainforests from illegal felling that it places money-making further down its priority list. Topher White says “We intend to leave our technology including solar panels free for use and modification”, rather than patenting the idea for their financial benefit. This fantastic new plan is in protection of the rainforests which are some of the most beautiful and definitely most diverse areas on our planet and without them we would also be eternally stuck as they provide a large proportion of our oxygen. Felling is helping the mass extinction humanity has induced on the planet, and though many attempt to deny this the United Nations have said “In effect, we are currently responsible for the sixth major extinction event in the history of earth”, something we definitely shouldn’t be putting on our CVs.
Illustration: Daisy Billowes
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t is popular knowledge nowadays to be wary that nothing we do online is truly anonymous, and recent revelations about the Whisper app have confirmed this once again. It has transpired that Whisper, a social media app that allows its users to post supposedly unidentifiable comments, is tracking the whereabouts of those who post. This is despite advertising itself as an anonymous and secure app, and allowing users to opt out of its geolocation tracking. Nonetheless, findings by the Guardian revealed that the location of the app’s users at the time of posting is saved and collated, within a 500m range of accuracy.
“Nothing is quite as secret as we expect”
The company behind the app deny the accusations as entirely fictitious, prior to The Guardian publishing the story. However the company then proceeded to rewrite its terms of usage shortly after, notably changing its terms to specifically state it will track all users’ location. Whilst many of the app’s users may be alarmed about this news, there are those who may have cause to be especially concerned. This is due to the app including so-called ‘whispers’ from those claiming to work in a variety of high-profile professions, ranging from the military to commercial brands such Disney, to the United States secret service and Government. If controversial comments can be attributed to well-known individuals, a scandal may well be at hand. Now a notable American Senator, Jay Rockefeller, Chairman of the Congressional Committee on Commerce, Science & Transportation has joined the debate. Rockefeller stated that “serious questions” have been raised regarding consumer privacy and requested an in-person briefing for Committee staff by Whisper’s CEO.
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This story has worrying implications for our general notions of privacy these days. Whisper is an app that had considerable emphasis on being anonymous and it now appears that they need not abide by this so long as a term, explicitly contradicting anonymity, is found buried in the small print. In the wake of the WikiLeaks and the NSA revelations alongside potential hacking of SnapSave for Snapchat photos, it should not really come as a surprise that nothing is quite as secret as we expect it to be. It is noteworthy though, that The Guardian’s investigation revealed that part of the location and user information Whisper shared was with authorities in the USA to prevent suicide and self-harm. Whilst this is arguably understandable in itself, it still should be seen as worrisome that an app may choose to collect such data about all its users. However, whilst it is easy to warn consumers, stating ‘be careful’ what you post online, do we expect people to not use any app for fear of giving away personal information? The line is unclear. Arguably, we should be able to expect basic privacy – especially where we are told we have it. In the quickly expanding and developing world of internet technology, it would appear that legal regulations are failing to keep up despite the need being desperate.
The Courier
35.puzzles
Monday 3 November 2014
Puzzles 1
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Puzzles Editor: Kate Bennett
Courier Catch- phrase
See if you can guess (catch) the common idiom (phrase) shown in these picture combos?
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Across
1 The Godfather of Soul (5, 5) 8 Notches cut into top of castle wall (13) 9 Coerces (7) 10 Scavenging canines known for their laugh (6) 11 Bread roll (3) 16 Eight-legged sea creature (7) 17 Currency used in Sweden and Iceland (5) 10 Opalescence (11) 22 Shade of blue used by Miranda Priestly to explain the trickle-down effect of the fashion industry in The Devil Wears Prada (8) 23 American (4)
For even more news, views, sports and culture, make sure you head over to thecourieronline. co.uk
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Down
1 Horse racer (6) 2 Conductor (7) 3 Alcoholic drink beloved of grans (6) 4 Gusto; pickle (6) 5 Sorceresses (7) 7 Exotic bird, often with crest on its head (8) 12 Bodily fluid carried in veins and arteries (5) 13 50s subculture associated with writers such as Kerouac and Ginsberg (7) 14 Star signs (6) 15 Small, opinion-dividing dogs, beloved of the internet (4) 18_ _ _ _ _ Martin, singer who’s ‘Livin’ La Vida Loca’ (5) 19 Fluorescent (4) 21 Slippery, snakelike fish, often served jellied with pie and mash (3)
Word Link
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“I’m Roy Walker and I heartily endorse this event and/or product”
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36.sportfeatures
Monday 3 November 2014
The Courier
All-round all-stars
This week, The Courier UHYLHZV DW DWKOHWHV ZKRVH LQVDWLDEOH KXQJHU IRU FRPSHWLWLRQ VLPSO\ FDQQRW VDWLV¿ HG E\ RQH VSRUW
Dwain Chambers Dwain Chambers is, to this day, one of the most decorated British sprinters ever. Since bursting onto the scenes during the 1998 European Championships, he has enjoyed a great deal of success at national and international level, both indoors and out. He is undoubtedly one of the finest athletes that this country has produced in recent times, particularly in the realms of sprinting. Chambers’ career, however, is one that has had its ups and downs; despite winning a silver medal at his first major championship, the shameful drugs ban he received in 2003 has irrevocably tarnished his sporting life. Despite being at almost peak condition, Chambers was forced to withdraw from athletic competition for several years causing him to pursue other avenues of sporting competition. For the most part, this was most ineffective; after a disastrous trial period with the San Francisco 49ers, Chambers returned to the UK to appear on the ce-
lebrity TV circuit, enjoying a brief stint on Hell’s Kitchen, hardly the vocation for a world class athlete. After a brief re-entry period into Athletics in 2005, Chambers gained a professional contract with NFL Europa team, Hamburg Sea Devils. Due to his previous transgressions, the franchise
“He is undoubtedly one of the finest athletes that this country has produced in recent times” stated publicly that Chambers would undergo a strenuous drugs testing regime and would have to meet impeccable standards throughout his time there. His NFL career, however, was shortlived; a stress fracture on his right foot sustained in training rendered Cham-
bers jobless yet again. This, however, did not deter Chambers from attempting other professional sports. In 2008, after another largely fruitless attempt to return to Athletics, Chambers revealed he had signed for Rugby League side, Castleford Dragons on a trial period, a confusing transitory enterprise to say the least. Indeed, after one game for the reserve team, the Tigers stated that they were unwilling to provide Chambers with a full time contract, citing his lack of aptitude as a central cause. Despite his foray into other sports, however, Chambers finally managed to re-enter the world of Athletics on a more permanent basis in 2008 where he has thankfully remained ever since. Versatile though he may be, let’s not kid ourselves into believing he should belong anywhere else. Jonty Mawer
Photography: Getty
Alex Zanardi On 5 September 2012, a 46-year-old Alex Zanardi won a gold medal in the men’s road time trial H4 at the London 2012 Paralympic Games by 27.14 seconds. He would win another Gold and a Silver before the end of the tournament. The younger spectators would not have known much about his career unless through the mentions of their parents. The now 48-year-old Italian has always been one for racing. Two spells in Formula One sharing the track with such legends as the late Aytron Senna, Michael Schumacher and Mikka Haikenan and racing for teams such as Lotus, Jordan and Williams amassing a total of 44 race starts as well as spells in the CART discipline. It was in 2000 when his path had to change. With nine laps to go in a race in 2001, after his emergence from the
pits Zanardi, avoided the car of Patrick Carpenter but Alan Tanguani who was behind Carpenter on the track was unable to do so and collided into the side of Zanardi’s car. The impact was enough to sever the nose of the vehicle and, with it, Zinardi’s legs as well. It was miraculous itself that the driver managed to survive having lost three quarters of his blood volume. The accident ended his racing career in open single-seated cars. However, he turned this misfortune to his advantage. Zanardi was fitted with two prosthetic legs which he designed to allow him to compare the weight and stiffness of various feet in order to find the ones most suitable for racing. However, he turned his attentions to a handcycling career. And the rest is history. Michael Rowan
Photography: Getty
Rebecca Romero One of the most successful multi-sport athletes in Britain’s recent history is undoubtedly Rebecca Romero. Born in the London suburb of Carshalton, Romero went on to study Sports Science and English at St Mary’s College from which she graduated in 2002 and gained immediate funding due to her aptitude at both rowing and cycling. Just two years after graduating, Romero went to the Athens Summer Olympics in 2004 after deciding on rowing as her discipline of choice. The decision clearly paid off as the athlete won a silver medal in the quadruple sculls along with her teammates Alison Mowbray, Debbie Flood and Frances Houghton finishing just two seconds behind Germany. Just a year later, Romero won the 2005 World Championships in Japan this time beating the Germans by less
than half a second.
“The Olympics in Beijing were surely the pinnacle of a career full of twists and turns” However, the fairytale wasn’t to continue when Romero was forced to quit rowing due to a persistent back injury in 2006 until, that is, she took up cycling. In December of the same year, Romero showed instant quality on the bicycle winning silver at the UCI Track World Cup in Moscow in the physically demanding pursuit. In March 2007, Romero claimed silver again, this time
at the Cycling World Championships before winning both the individual and team pursuits at the 2008 UCI World Championships on home soil in Manchester. Romero was clearly as skilled on the track as she was on the water and the best was yet to come. The Olympics in Beijing were surely the pinnacle of a career full of twists and turns as Romero won gold in the individual pursuit beating fellow Brit Wendy Houvenaghel by over two seconds to become only the second woman in history to win a medal in two different sports at the Summer Olympics. Unfortunately, Romero could not continue her success as the individual pursuit was dropped from the Summer Olympic Games and the glittering athlete withdrew before London 2012. Alex Hendley
Photography: Getty
The Courier
sportfeatures.37
Monday 3 November
Vincent ‘Bo‘ Jackson Vincent Edward ‘Bo’ Jackson, the ‘greatest athlete of all time’ according to ESPN, at 6 ft. 1 inch and weighing 230lbs was undeniably a freak of nature. He is the only person ever to be named an All-Star in two major American sports – baseball and American football respectively. He was even quick enough for the United States Track Team had he decided to pursue that path. In 1982, Jackson could have played for the illustrious New York Yankees but instead attended Auburn University on a football scholarship leading to him being the recipient of the Heisman Trophy in 1985 (a trophy awarded to the most outstanding collegiate football player in the United States). Subsequently in the 1986, NFL Draft he was drafted first by the Tampa Bay Buccaneers but instead chose to play baseball for the Kansas City Royals that season. After impressive performances in every season, he was chosen in 1989
to play for the American League All Star Team. Here, he was named MVP for the game in both offense and defence. Baseball simply just wasn’t enough and in 1987 Jackson signed for the NFL outfit the Los Angeles Raiders. However, due to NCAA restrictions he was limited to how much he could play but when he did, he was astounding. In 1989, he rushed an astonishing 950 yards in a mere 11 games. Leading to him playing in the Pro Bowl. Serious injury in 1990 ended his football career but he was able to make a comeback playing for the Chicago White Sox. ‘SuperBo’ as he is often dubbed is, in many ways, like a mythological figure to many Americans with legends circulating about his superhuman abilities. When he was 13 years old, it is believed he jumped over a moving car. Legends like this may not be true but one thing certainly is - Bo Jackson is legendary. Matthew Larkin
Sports Editor Peter Georgiev inspects the most bizarre moments from the VSRUWLQJ ZRUOG WKLV ZHHN
I
Photography: Getty
Adam Gemili
Photography: Getty
Adam Gemili is Britain’s breakthrough sprinting sensation. 21 years old and already having numerous medals under his belt, it would seem as though sprinting had always been his destiny. Yet, from a young age was making his way up the ranks of another sport. From an early age, Gemili showed promising abilities on the football field having been scouted at the age of eight by Premier League giants Chelsea. Demonstrating talent and quality, Chelsea kept him in their ranks for the next seven years and allowed him a short spell at Reading to further his experience. Gemili, determined to gain as much knowledge of the game as he could, took the initiative to move out from Chelsea. He continued his career as a defender for Football League Two side Dagenham & Redbridge during the 2010/2011 season before joining Thurrock on loan in the conclusive parts of the campaign. Gemili longed to make it as a professional footballer playing week in week
out in the Premier League, however in 2011, he took two silver medals at the European Junior Championships in Tallinn. Following this success, Adam was facing the hardest dilemma of his career so far - hanging up the boots or stick on the spikes. The youngster entered the athletics world with a bang grabbing the 2012 World Junior Championships gold medal in the 100m run in Barcelona. His progress has continued with the Briton becoming one of the world’s most promising up and coming athletes. Gemili’s most recent and probably most recognised success came at the 2014 Glasgow Commonwealth Games. The home British crowd helped their favourite surge to two silver medals in the 100m and 4x100m relay. There is no doubt that his résumé speaks for itself. Although one will always wonder if Mourinho will see Gemili as the one that got away. Lynsey Brownlie
Andrew ‘Freddie’ Flintoff Andrew ‘Freddie’ Flintoff: cricketer, national hero, former party-boy. Known for his exploits both on and off the cricket field, Flintoff endeared himself to the British public with his explosive ball hitting and ferocious fast bowling. The time soon came in his career, however, when 6 foot 4’s worth of Lancastrian took its toll on his body and after several knee operations he called time on what was the career of an ‘icon’, a phrase I do not use lightly. Having clearly struggled to know what to do next for a couple of months, news broke that the man himself would be taking to a different kind of arena - the boxing ring. Known for his crowd pleasing, it would turn out to be an interesting venture for the Preston born fast bowler. Instead of taking his opponents heads off with the ball he would be using his fists, would he be good? Nobody knew. Under the watchful eye of trainer
Barry McGuigan, Flintoff won the fight on points. Not convincingly, it must be added. The technique wasn’t there but then again his cricketing technique was also always questioned and it worked. Like a flailing sweaty windmill, Flintoff had tamed American rookie Richard Dawkins. It is probably safe to say he is not going to be taking on Carl Froch anytime soon but this crossover was one for the fans. One for the fans with a desire to see him fit, strong and back to health mentally, Freddie was back and he was firing. The post-match interview was a show in itself, it proved you can take the boy out of Lancashire but can’t take Lancashire out of the boy. White as a sheet, the clearly depleted Flintoff simply laughed and said, “Aye, that were right fun”. My hero in a nutshell. Josh Nicholson
Photography: Getty
n tennis, you would often see a broken racket, a conflict with the referee or perhaps some swearing. Given the intensity of the game, fans around the world are used to Fabio Fognini’s occasional vulgarity and Ernests Gulbis’ bursts of anger. Yet, even such levels of disappointment rarely provoke the most honest of responses. So, imagine how Tommy Robredo must have felt when he double middle-fingered Andy Murray after the recent final in Valencia. Having missed five match points, Robredo lost to the Scot and rested his tired body on the net before producing what could only be described as the reaction of the year. And how could you blame the guy? Last month, he once again faced Murray in a showdown. This time it was the Shenzhen title match. With a set up and a 6-2 lead in the tiebreak, the Spaniard failed to close it and then hopelessly watched Andy running away with the trophy after a comeback. Ten match points in two finals. That’s gotta hurt. In the end, all turned out jolly and heartwarming with both players sharing a hug to honour an exhilarating contest. But even if it hadn’t, would it have been so shockingly repulsive?
Photography: Getty
Now, tennis fans usually enjoy the unwritten gentleman etiquette of their favourite sport. Compliments, smiles and a convincing mutual friendship are the cornerstones of the ATP blatant PR mechanism. This everybody-likes-us strategy has paid dividends given the busy world tour tennis players annually complete. Nevertheless, Robredo seemed to nonchalantly spit on the association’s principles and would be lucky to get away with it. Hopefully, he will. Because spicing up the almost utopian elite the Spaniard is a part of might not be the worst idea. Tennis currently features some great battles between godlike players in the shape of Federer, Nadal and Djokovic. Still, the sport lacks authentic vicious rivalries and the aggression necessary for their development. Of course, Robredo’s flamboyant middle-fingering is far from inflaming a legendary conflict with Murray but it might give the tennis society a reason to reevaluate the relationships between players on court. Indeed, despite staged, the pureness of tennis is what distinguishes the game from other barbaric, even profane, games dominated by rage. However, ATP should consider it acceptable for players to express their genuine emotions once in a while. With that in mind, even if you weren’t impressed with Robredo’s actions, cut him some slack. For sometimes the two gun salute makes a bigger impact than the handshake. Illustration by Daisy Billowes
38.sportbucs
Monday 3 November 2014
The Courier
Durham pummel spirited Toon Women’s Rugby Newcastle 1sts
0
Durham 1sts
51
By Calum Wilson at Cochrane Park Despite a brave showing from Newcastle last Wednesday, they proved powerless against in-form Durham. The 51-0 victory meant the visiting team have now scored 140 points and conceded only 5 in their three competitive BUCS games this season. That in mind, credit must go to Newcastle for battling on for the full 80 minutes in what was, result aside, a competitive encounter. The hosts got off to the worst possible start, conceding almost straight from the kick off after Durham’s outside centre ran wide from halfway before cutting inside and proving too fast for Fullback Sam West. Touching down under the posts, to give the Durham kicker an easy opportunity to set up an early 7-0 advantage. After the early shock, Newcastle refocused, regrouped and enjoyed their first spells of meaningful possession. Although initially camped in their own half, a penalty six minutes into the game allowed the home side to kick forward for a lineout on the opposition twenty two metre line. A further penalty gifted Sarah Driver the chance to get within metres of the try line, only to be denied at the last second. Newcastle were made to pay minutes later. The away side scoring from a seemingly harmless lineout 40 metres out with a series of quick and effective passes along the line. Outside centre Sarah Barker was unable to hold onto her opposite number whose pace and power caused the Newcastle backs problems throughout. The No.13 offloading to a Durham winger who went over in the corner, unchallenged. Durham’s backline exerted their dominance on numerous occasions, their physical size advantage over the Newcastle backs clear to see from the sideline. A series of well-rehearsed attacks doing the damage as the game opened up and they were able to get more ballin-hand. The hosts will be disappointed to be guilty of a few too many misjudged tackles. Having failed to establish a foothold, the game began to run-away from Newcastle. This time an unforced er-
ror, knocking the ball on and conceding a scrum thirty metres from their own line. Quick thinking from the Durham scrum half caught the Newcastle defence napping on the blind-side before setting up the right winger for a simple line-break and try in the corner to stretch the lead to 17. Straight from the kick-off Durham’s winger broke free again, beating the last defender only to be called back by the referee, who had spotted an earlier infringement. The home side then temporarily lost inspirational No.8 Sarah Driver to injury. Whilst recuperating on the touchline, Driver witnessed her teammates concede again following a neat kick over the top from the visiting fly half. The bouncing ball fell kindly into Durham hands and the away team took a 22-0 lead into half time. Presumably, the Newcastle coach’s half time message was to make sure they went down fighting. It was a day to have fun and to compete cleanly and fairly, minimizing injuries as much as possible. This spirit seemed to shine through in a much-improved second half, with numerous positives to draw on for the next game. However the coach will certainly be working on limiting unforced errors, a second costly spillage allowing the opposition winger to help herself to her second, and Durham’s fifth, try of the afternoon. The visitors then quickly added two more converted tries to extend the deficit to 41. The first, an impressive weaving solo run from the No.11, finished off under the posts. The second came as a result of another error on Newcastle’s part. A fumble and a clever improvised grubber later, and the game was well out of reach of even the greatest comeback. Nevertheless, inspired by a sudden appearance in the crowd of old girl, Rosie Neal, Newcastle continued to scrap and fight until the end. Neither side let up in the last 20 minutes and, but for a couple of late bundled tries from the Durham forwards, the score line would have had a slightly more respectable feel to it. As it was, Newcastle can take a lot of positives into their next few matches. A very spirited performance against a stronger Durham team, who almost inevitably will end up in the top two in BUCS Premier North division this season. The Newcastle women will next face Edinburgh away, with the players expecting a more competitive and heartening match.
Photography: Calum Wilson
Clean sweep for netballers on home ground Netball By Abi Dodwell at The Sports Centre NUNC 1sts 30-27 Leeds 1sts The intensity of the match from the second it began was truly unbelievable. Newcastle 1st team made every pass count as they fought to keep possession whilst Hattie Grant stayed tight on her opponent and made constant tips. Farah Hasan also played incredibly as she chased down and won every loose ball. Because of this tight play Newcastle came out if the first quarter 9-5 up. As the 2nd quarter began Newcastle stepped up their game as Laura Brady made great passes out of defence speeding the ball up the court to Emily Whiteside who almost couldn’t miss. Every member of the team put up top quality defence as Alice Hagyard stole
the ball and ignored the brutal shoving of her WD. But enough cannot be said for Mia Archer who was crucial in gaining interceptions on even the strongest passes by Leeds. By half time Newcastle were up 15-12 and Georgia st Rose was swapped on for the third quarter. She put great pressure on her WA as soon as she came on court and caused them
“Every week the 1st team amaze with their quality of play ”
to make errors and delayed their play. Consequently Newcastle emerged victorious once more today with a brilliant 30-27 win. Every week Newcastle 1st team amaze with their quality of play as they push themselves to achieve their best. Every single member of the team today gave their all and not only that but the communication and teamwork was something that every team should
aspire to. Well done girls for the win, this is definitely the first of many this season. NUNC 3rds 50-40 Sunderland 1sts Newcastle’s 3rd team were ecstatic to take their first win of the season today, a victory which was well fought and deserved. By the end of the first quarter Newcastle had a solid lead of 7 goals and were dominating the game, leaving Sunderland to play catch up. Lauren Parker played an absolute stormer as she went all out for every centre pass ensuring that Newcastle maintained possession and playing a crucial part in giving Newcastle their lead. In the 2nd and 3rd quarters Sunderland began to creep up on our lead as their shooting was on point However Charlotte Pickard’s spectacular lean and Grace Brumhill’s continuous interceptions put immense pressure on the Sunderland
attack. Although the scores got within 4 goals with Newcastle still just holding a lead we managed to pull away and head into the final quarter with a 9 goal lead. Newcastle went in with their heads up and were hungry for the win as they fought off Sunderland’s final push. Olivia Gordon’s incredible shooting was unstoppable and left Sunderland speechless and she nailed every shot, making her the player of the match. Newcastle left today with a fantastic victory that was well deserved and earned by every single player on court. NUNC 4ths 59-26 Leeds 5ths Knowing that this was going to be a tough game Newcastle University’s 4th team entered the sports hall ready to put up a great fight against their opponent. Poppy Briggs gave the team a solid start as she ensured the team kept every centre with her accurate and strong feeds. Newcastle’s possession was made even
stronger by WA Isa Telford who drove out for every centre pass and kept her WD from being able to make any interceptions. By the end of the 1st half Newcastle were up 24-12 and continued to keep lead strong which Captain Isa Telford put down to the fact that ‘Everyone got interceptions and was fighting passionately for the ball.’ Sophie Houghton made numerous steals and was essential in helping the ball move down the court allowing Steph Garfield to put up and secure shot after shot even against Leeds’ strong defence. As the team entered their final quarter, they were pretty much guaranteed the win but kept playing their hardest as they were spurred on by the many NUNC supporters who were thrilled to see such great quality netball. It truly was a great game and the final result very much shows how much of a threat our 4th team pose in this season.
The Courier
sportbucs.39
Monday 3 November 2014
Knights shine bright against Manucia Men’s Basketball Newcastle 1sts
94
Manchester 1sts
75
By Huezin Lim at The Sports Centre After a thumping defeat by the Salford in an away game last week, the Newcastle 1sts were in the Sports Centre early for warm-ups and with Manchester arriving late, they were given extra time to get into the competitive mindset. As soon as the match began, Oyefusi started strongly for the Knights with a sleek cut to the basket, scoring the first points. Throughout the first quarter, pick and roll worked extremely well for Newcastle with the score in the first few minutes, 6 to 2 to Newcastle. With a rushed warm-up and fatigue from the travels, Manchester were clearly struggling with the pace of the game and were chasing the game, 16 – 4 right from the start. Despite the dominant lead, the
a foul despite three people surrounding him. As the quarter ended with Newcastle ahead by 9 points, the Manchester coach stressed to reverse the passing to find a better shot and to talk on screens. Unfamiliarity with the BUCS rule caused minor confusion amongst the Manchester players, resulting in a shotclock violation. The second quarter saw scrappier play with turnovers and players falling over before Manchester called a timeout. Both teams needed to return to simplicity, finding the open man and increased physical intensity. The Newcastle offense was finding open shots and more importantly, draining them, giving Manchester little opportunity to find their way back into the game. The fast break was Newcastle’s forte and they made the easy lay-up time after time. However, the second half ended on a high for the Manchester team as Sims hit a buzzer-beating three-pointer. With the score at 44 – 30 to Newcastle, Manchester reiterated the need for communication and physicality. Coach Hewitt, with his relentless spirit, pushed his
“The Newcastle offence was finding open shots and, more importantly, draining them” first time out was called by Newcastle with Coach Hewitt stressing boxing out for rebounds as well as reducing careless decisions. A common theme for the Manchester coach was communication on defence, especially on screens. One of the noteworthy matches of the match happened in the first quarter when the referee missed a clear back-court violation on Manchester, with the Newcastle bench shouting and calling for it. This was merely the beginning of a few missed calls by the referee, with Coach Hewitt shaking his head inexplicably. As the quarter went on, Manchester settled down into a zone defence, reducing paint penetration but nothing could stop Chuck Duru, scoring a layup with
players to shut the opposing team down to a mere 40 points. As the second half began, it was undoubtedly the Maurice Evans show. The number 9 guard took over with steal after steal, providing easy lay-ups, for himself and his teammates. His unselfish play in finding the open player for the three-pointer was remarkable as well. With an and-1 play to start the quarter, Evans single-handedly played in 8 points within one minute, forcing turnovers and fouls. It was clear that Manchester and Newcastle were offense-oriented teams, with both teams finding the basket with ease time and time again. However, with Newcastle being in the lead, Manchester needed
Photography: Huezin Lim
to get some defensive stops to stand any chance to find their way back into the game. Another factor that put Manchester on the path to defeat was their failure to capitalize on their opportunities at the free-throw line. If they were to score all their free-throws, they would have definitely brought the Knights’s lead to 5 points or less. At the end of the third quarter with the score 70 – 57 to Newcastle, Coach Hewitt was blatant with his criticism of the team, allowing too many cuts and penetration to Manchester, a team they should have been
dominating. The game reaching its conclusion with the fourth quarter, Newcastle wanted to use the shot-clock as much as possible, slowing plays down to the point where they turned the ball over twice with shot-clock violations. On the next Newcastle possession, none other than Evans found the open man with his pass, knocking down the open three-pointer. With 2 minutes left, Newcastle kept up the offensive intensity and led 91 to 68 with Manchester resorting to desperate three-pointers to restore some dignity
to the team. The one blemish in the end of the game was to see Maurice leaving the game to injury after hustling for the ball on the ground, finishing the match with 16 points, 5 steals and several assists. As the end of the game sounded, Newcastle rang out comfortable winners at 94 – 75 against Manchester and there was satisfaction from the audience at having watch a fast paced offensive game. The next game will find Newcastle travelling to Lancashire and more importantly, the Newcastle Knights will face Northumbria on 12 November.
Spilman’s ladies cruise to away win Women’s Rugby Hull 1sts
7
Newcastle 2nds
27
By Maddie Morfett-Murdock in Hull
Photography: Maddie Morfett-Murdock
With the first match of the season for the women’s rugby seconds on the cards all the girls meet bright and early for the long journey to Hull. The coach was buzzing with a mix of excitement, nerves and line out run-throughs. All fired up and ready to go the Newcastle girls powered forward at the first kick with fresher Jess Hepburn utilising the space in Hull’s defensive line to score the first try of the match within 2 minutes leaving Newcastle 5-0 up. Hull reorganised their defence line but it remained weak in areas and following a strong scrum from Newcastle fresher Aisling Hunt manoeuvred passed Hull towards our try line with three players close on her tail. Hunt was tackled right on the try line scoring the second try of the game to bring Newcastle up to 10-0. Play continued with Hull gaining momentum, a gap in Newcastle’s line following a scrum saw Hull score their first try, followed by a clean conversion. However following a team talk at half time Newcastle got their momentum back to gain control in scrums which
were improving by the minute. Newcastle became increasingly stronger in the rucks with fresher Jen Boggiano’s confidence rising as she successfully stole the ball on many occasions. A quick turnover in possession saw Miriam Franklin break passed Hull with a fantastic run, side-stepping many players to score Newcastle’s third try and bring the score to 15-7. Some wonderful line out steals by freshers Natalie Hamer and Laura Barlow saw Newcastle gaining ground and bringing the try line closer. This gain in ground gave Franklin another opportunity to break through Hull, scoring another brilliant try. Newcastle were leading 20-7 as Hunt stepped up and easily converted the try. A 22-7 lead with 10 minutes to go left Newcastle with the determination to up their game even more. An excellent carry by fresher Rosie Cox into a maul saw metres of ground covered followed by some swift hands from Hamer out to Franklin who swung round the side of a Hull player and into space, passing onto Hepburn and following in with support. Hepburn sprinted passed the remaining Hull defenders to strongly place the ball over the line, scoring the final try of the game. As the final whistle blew and elated Newcastle stood celebrating their first win of the season with an absolutely incredible 27-7 final score.
Sport
www.thecourieronline.co.uk Monday 3 November 2014 Issue 1298 Free
thecourieronline.co.uk/sport
Sports Editors: Peter Georgiev, Jonty Mawer & Huezin Lim Online Sports Editor: Josh Nicholson courier.sport@ncl.ac.uk | @Courier_Sport
Newcastle 2-2 Manchester
Photography: Alex Hendley
Toon grab point but lose 100% record By Alex Hendley at Longbenton 3G Newcastle University Men’s 1st Team came from 2-0 down to earn a point at the Longbenton 3G against an impressive University of Manchester side who held a comfortable lead after just 25 minutes. Goals from Jordan Cross and Alex Ames made sure of the point, but the home side will perhaps be disappointed to lose their 100% record in the BUCS Northern 1A League. Having comprehensively beaten Sheffield and Liverpool so far this season, the boys went in to the game full of confidence and with high morale. This showed even during the warm-up as the lads joked and looked cheerful prematch, surely confident of outplaying Manchester, who prior to Wednesday had only picked up a point from their opening games, five points behind Newcastle. However, the early optimism quickly vanished, as the University of Manchester came out of the traps aggressively and effectively, forcing Newcastle goalkeeper Daniel Readman into a save to prevent Jacob Robinson from scoring an early opener. The big man in nets sprawled across the close range effort, deflecting the ball away from goal. Newcastle were struggling to keep a hold of possession, much to the frustration of the manager and substitutes on the sidelines, as slack passing and wayward balls allowed an eagerly pressing Manchester side to cut out attacks almost before they had begun to form. Newcastle did manage to get a fully fledged assault on the Manchester defence around 10 minutes into the game,
but Jake Salisbury’s low cross into the box evaded Olly Walker and Jordan Cross coming in at the far post. Not long after, Manchester made their sharper start to the game count, as around 15 minutes into the game Harry Clare, who had started the match energetically, saw Julian Hornby’s cross fall to him on the edge of the penalty area. The winger finished the move with a sublime half-volley that dropped into the far bottom corner of Readman’s net, giving the keeper no chance and the Manchester touchline plenty to celebrate.
which had looked as solid as a rock all afternoon. Manchester looked especially powerful down the right hand side where Samuel ‘Folkesy’ Folkes tracked runs, played sturdy tackles and also bombed down the wing in a Seamus Colemanesque display. Most of Newcastle’s best work came down the left wing for the remainder of the half, with Jack Taylor and Alex Ames fighting hard to penetrate Folkes’ defensive area. They finally made it pay off on the stroke of half time, when they burst down the flank, finding Salisbury,
“The second half began as the day fell colder, with jackets pulled on and hands stuffed into deep pockets, but Newcastle’s performance did nothing but heat up” Sammy Boylan almost added a second, but his spark was snuffed out by the body of Readman, who was clearly having a busy game. Newcastle then began to grow into their football. Robbie Sweet’s audacious diagonal ball was plucked out of the air by Manchester goalie Michael Haykin, before Cross won a corner that was harmlessly cleared. The opportunities weren’t becoming any clearer, but at last they the Geordies were creating them. The away side, however, struck again as Michael Mackintosh - the central midfielder, who ran the game for much of the first half - swung in a curling free kick from about 25 yards out, that was headed in with power and accuracy by Sam Jowett. The goal left Newcastle with a mountain to climb against a defence
who fired a low cross across the face of goal met by Cross. The first half drew to a close and Newcastle were on the up, trailing by a goal but now with the optimism that they could make their quality count after the break. The second half began as the day fell colder, with jackets pulled on and hands stuffed into deep pockets, but Newcastle’s performance did nothing but heat up as they began their quest for the equalising goal they knew they could deliver. Sweet was on hand for most dead ball situations, sweeping in corners and free-kicks at every opportunity - and last week’s goalscorer Charlie Pilkington the defender was often available to rise above the defence and get his forehead on the ball - but on numerous occasions
failed to hit the target and replicate last week’s heroics. Despite Newcastle’s dominance in the second half and the away side’s dip in energy, Manchester still looked dangerous. Mackintosh’s corners were always an issue, finding Jowett time and time again, but the goalscorer couldn’t double his tally for the wintery afternoon. At the other end, Olly Walker was putting himself about strongly and earned a corner from his deflected shot, around 65 minutes into the game. The corner wasn’t dangerous, but the ball in from the opposite side of the pitch from Cross was met by the late but perfectly timed run of Ames, who had impressed hugely on the left wing to head in the equaliser that sent the home touchline jumping and shouting. The second half was entirely different to the first, with energy in abundance from the Newcastle players in red, compared to the Manchester whites, who had fatigued no end since the break. If there was going to be a winner now it would come from the home side, with substitute striker Joey Laver on for Walker there was fresh legs up front as Newcastle pushed for the three points, but unfortunately for them the Manchester defence remained too organised for them to break through. After the game, the Manchester coach seemed unimpressed with his team’s fitness and it’s no wonder why, after watching a performance in which Newcastle grew into the game, whereas Manchester withered. Next week, the Geordies travel to Liverpool John Moores University in attempt to get back to winning after their spirited, never-say-die performance.
JACK OF ALL TRADES
P.37 BALLERS BALL
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