STAND BY YOUR SIDE Giggles & Grins

Friend: Who is your favorite literary vampire?

Me: The one in Sesame Street. Friend: He doesn’t count.

Me: I can assure you that he does.

My kids are so open to experiencing culture. They’ll try anything, from chicken tenders at a Mexican restaurant to chicken tenders at a Mediterranean restaurant.

Sometimes, I read a text and think, “What a psycho.”

Then I press send.

A good relationship is when she is by your side during bad times to tell you that none of this would have happened if you had just listened to her.

One hundred years ago, everyone owned a horse and only the rich had cars. Today, everyone has cars, and only the rich own horses. The stables have turned.

Hacker: I have all your passwords.

Me: OMG, thank you, what are they?

Friend: Tell me something I don’t know.

Me: The word “nun” is just the letter “n” doing a cartwheel.

Therapist: And, what do we say when we’re sad?

Me: ADD TO CART.

Therapist: No…