Belonging Leadership Essentials

At the heart of belonging is personal fit. Many leaders fear to ask the right question—not where do I fit but rather, do I fit? Those shaped by deeply embedded organizational structures are often too quick to answer the question of whether a leader fits, even the strongest, most tenured leaders. Yet, it is not the organization’s answer on which we rely, but our own. You decide your fit. You decide when and what to fight for and how you can best make an impact.

Even seasoned leaders have been surprised at how radically their results have changed when they became intentional about belonging. When we are centered in our own identity and capacity for contribution, the ability to challenge everything becomes a reliable tool. As we think about our fit and our place in the belonging equation, we can determine what must be redesigned, reoriented, and repurposed for our ability to navigate today’s challenges.

Leaders are required to assemble diverse teams; understand their strengths and weaknesses; empathize with and solicit nuanced, diverse perspectives; and sustain positive, enduring relationships, all while advancing the organization’s bottom line. The superhuman stamina and foresight being demanded of leaders under constant threat of making a misstep detracts from the boldness required to bring people together effectively and meaningfully elevate their contributions.

The belonging leader understands the unique, constantly evolving, sometimes elusive opportunity that each day presents them. They can deftly navigate between those who have and do not have, those who care and do not care, those who see the whole and those who see only a part. They tackle the complicated work of creating equilibrium as they listen, design, create, and implement change. One of the greatest challenges of the belonging leader is not whether to change or determine the ultimate solution; rather, it is the speed at which to implement change, and how the leader chooses to explain their vision for it.

Yes, the belonging leader is expected to show off their superpowers. And when they happen to encounter their personal kryptonite, and they are at their most challenged, exhausted, and threatened, all eyes will be on them and how they choose. It is in these moments where the belonging leader is defined: Will they be open to creating solutions and spaces that bring others into their leadership, or will they shrink their circle to exclude and elevate only those closest to them?

The leader-of-you framing helps build the emotional intelligence and cultural competence that belonging leaders require. Beyond that, to create cultures of acceptance and unity, belonging leaders need to engage deeply with each of the five Belonging Rules, understanding what they are and how to live them out day to day. Belonging leadership is about behaving in ways that align with your identity, promoting a collective experience of “we’re all in this together” and “we’re all safe here,” while giving people the fuel so desperately needed to perform at the highest level.

The following list describes actions that leaders can start taking to reinforce and uphold the five rules in their organizations, the summation of which along with the leader of you helps to infuse belonging.

• Turning into the power necessitates that leaders be prepared to listen to and learn from any individual in the organization who speaks up in the pursuit of fairness, equity, and inclusion. Leaders must assess the structures that preserve inequities and the biases and behaviors that lead to exclusion. They also need to understand how the landscape of their organization perpetuates behaviors and actions inconsistent with the leader’s vision of what is necessary and right and must be willing to act in ways that defy status quo such that appropriate and meaningful change for that organization can be pursued and enacted.

• Listening without labels is crucial for fostering open yet challenging environments, ones where differences are engaged and celebrated rather than hidden or disregarded. Listening without labels involves listening from the heart, from a place of curiosity and no judgment. It requires attention to stereotypes and bias (as noted earlier, we are hardwired to engage from a place of craving similarity, versus celebrating differences). This type of listening empowers us to get to the root of every issue, to engage one another with curiosity and steer clear of quick, prescriptive judgments. Leaders who master this rule hear what is spoken without judgment while engaging the unspoken with humanity and heart. They adjust and adapt to all different cultures, values, and perspectives.

• Empowering identity over purpose requires an accurate and authentic evaluation of the organization as well as all individuals within it. Leaders need to recognize and be able to discuss identities in all their complexity and wholeness. They need to understand identity as the organization’s ecosystem and all the elements within it. By recognizing the complexity of organizational identity, leaders can better understand how to celebrate difference and reap the rewards of diversity instead of forcing assimilation or inauthenticity. Belonging leaders know that the organizational identity can be evolved, so they regularly question its assumptions to ensure all employees feel like they belong to a common purpose, something worth aligning their individual selves with.

• Challenging everything rests upon the creation of a psychologically safe environment, one where everyone feels secure in speaking up, be it with positive or critical feedback. Leaders who challenge everything welcome critical conversations, drawing on effective challenges to see them through. By embedding this rule, belonging leaders create cultures of creativity, as speaking up and out becomes the norm at all levels, rather than a suggestion or, at worst, a violation. Leaders can develop and encourage greater challenge from all organizational members by encouraging speech and dissent while ensuring that personal attacks or any form of discrimination will not be tolerated. Leaders should continuously engage in employee