JULY 14, 2010 ISSUE 600
DAVID ATLANTA MAGAZINE 1874 Piedmont Avenue 390-C Atlanta, GA 30324 Mon-Fri 9:30am-6:00pm Phone: 404.418.8901 Fax: 404.418.8901 ext. 7 www.davidatlanta.com email@example.com publisher Matt Neumann firstname.lastname@example.org
editor Jesse Hancock
creative director Knyckolas Davis
28 july 14, 2010
14 essentially major 38 spotlight seen@ 12 19 20 39 46 52 54
56 58 66 68 69 80
guides 26 datebook
70 bartab 74 the guide 83 classifieds
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Opinions expressed by any writer appearing in this publication are not necessarily those of the staff, management, advertisers, organizations or persons appearing in this magazine. No Part of this publication may be reproduced by any means: electronic, mechanical, photocopy recording or otherwise without written permission from the publisher. The mention, appearance or likeness of any person, business, organization, or event in this publication is in no way to be taken as any identification of the sexual, social or political orientation of such persons, businesses, events organizations, staff, shareholders or owners of such. DAVID ATLANTA MAGAZINE is not responsible for claims made by advertisers, errors or changes in information, events and schedules in ads, features or calendars. DAVID ATLANTA MAGAZINE reserves the right to reject or cancel any advertisement submitted. All copy, text, graphics, photo's and illustrations in submitted ads are published with the understanding that the person and business’ submitting such are fully authorized and have secured proper consent for the use of images, graphics, pictures, names, logos and testimonials used in such ads and that DAVID ATLANTA MAGAZINE may lawfully publish the same. By submitting such materials, the advertiser agrees to indemnify and hold blameless DAVID ATLANTA MAGAZINE from any liability resulting from the publication of any such materials or images.
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essentially major by Michael Jeffrey
Love Thy Neighbor
Something’s in life are sacred. High on that list for me are the conveniences that metropolitan city living provides; namely a less than a half mile proximity to a clean & preferably cruisy gym, the ever essential Starbucks coffeehouse, and a reputable premium quality grocery store. Oddly enough, these are also the same places I find myself claiming sole ownership of. My sense of entitlement frequently slips out in the form of an “Oh really? You got to my gym?” or a “Hey! What are you doing in my grocery store?” You’d swear Publix had devoted a staff of seventy to cater to my every need just for loitering in the four or five aisles I frequent each day. The only problem with dedicating public property to yourself is that you’re often disappointed when it’s overridden by intruders (more commonly referred to as the neighbors next door). There is always this tense emotion of spitefulness that sets in just as one beats you to a good parking spot or breezes away while you wait anxiously at the end of a never-ending checkout line. Still, every cloud does have its silver lining. Pick the right neighborhood and you could potentially land yourself in a goldmine. This I delightfully discovered once I moved to Midtown. Instead of jostling with soccer moms and their bratty tribes, my turfs wars are now battled out exclusively amongst the gays. And unless you’ve snagged a winner when all you came for was coffee creamer and Q-tips, don’t knock picking up a date along with your groceries until you’ve tried. “Never shit where you eat!” is what I can always count on Chase to remind me. Her boundaries around comingling on common territory have always been about as strict as the Geneva Convention. I’d receive her advice wholeheartedly if it weren’t for the fact that she slipped up once and made out with her boss on the job. They’re now happily married and house hunting for a child ready home in Atlantic Station, so her ability to campaign for this particular dating regulation is shaky at best. 14 davidatlanta
Or so I thought, until one steamy summer afternoon I got a craving for Dole Strawberry popsicles and rushed to my frozen food aisle for relief. There - sandwiched in between the tubs of ice cream and wine coolers - I found a man who made frozen fruit juice on a stick seems as refreshing as mud flavored water. I promptly put my powers of persuasion to use and toted him home with me instead; no paper or plastic necessary. By the time all was said and done, the afternoon had slipped into the evening and my surprise guest had caused my earlier cravings to quadruple in intensity. “So how about we go and get something to eat?” he recommended. I eagerly accepted, thrilled at that fact that I’d still be getting the original satisfaction I sought from grocery store in the first place. Its funny how sex with a stranger can be so fulfilling, yet a dinner table conversation with the same person can be as exhilarating as and IRS audit. For an hour I listened to him chatter about absolutely nothing, attempting to latch on to even the vaguest topic that might spark some sort of conversation I’d find bearable. Unfortunately the only relief arrived when the waiter finally delivered us the check. Afterwards, I offered to drop him off at his place so that at least his last memory of me would be as that of a gentleman. He smiled at the offer and began to give me directions, until soon I found myself parked directly in front of my own home. “You live in my building?” I blurted out. “Why didn’t you tell me that before?” “Well, you never really asked. See you on the elevator neighbor,” he said slyly before kissing me on the cheek and hopping out of the car. And it was right then I accepted that as much as I hated it to be true, Chase was right. Shitting where you eat is never a good idea, unless, of course, you’re fucking the boss.
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by Jesse Hancock
Opening New Doors “The doors we open and close each day decide the lives we live.” As we present to you the 600th issue of David, this statement, made famous by Flora Whittemore, couldn’t be more true, and we couldn’t be more excited. First, let me say congratulations to David Valentine. A door has opened for him as the new editor of Southern Voice. David and I have worked tirelessly together for the past several months, despite many challenges. He is a hard worker and will do a great job. A door has opened for me as well. I was asked by the publisher to be the new editor of David. Without any hesitation, I gladly take on this new responsibility and pledge to readers to do my best to keep what is good and improve what needs work. I know it won’t be easy following the footsteps of people like Mike Fleming, whose legacy won’t be forgotten. I’d love to hear from
you along the way. Let me know what you like, what you’d like to see more or less of, and what we can do to be your number one LGBT entertainment magazine in Atlanta. A quick note, as most readers in Atlanta know, David and Southern Voice were nonexistent a few months ago after the parent company went bankrupt. To make a long story short, David and Sovo are back thanks to Matt Neumann, our new publisher, who cares a great deal about this profession and the LGBT community. Joseph Campbell said, “When you follow your bliss... doors will open where you would not have thought there would be doors; and where there wouldn’t be a door for anyone else.” For myself, Matt, and the staff at David, we are doing something we all love to do and providing a service and entertainment to our readers. Here’s to 600 more issues!
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Thursday, July 15 Friday, July 16
Golden Summer Party The Fab Chorus Aurum Lounge will host the Atlanta Executive Network’s annual summer soiree. Food will be served and there will be a cash bar. This is a great social and professional networking opportunity, so don’t forget to look your best and bring your business card. $10, Free for members, 6:30 pm, Aurum Lounge 108 8th St., www.aen.org
Sassy Southerners Julia, Suzanne, Mary Jo, and Charlene
are back in Designing Women Live! The Process Theater will perform two episodes from the classic TV sitcom. Proceeds benefit The Process Theater and Onstage Atlanta. Through July 17. $20-$23, 8:00 pm, Onstage Atlanta 2597 North Decatur Rd., 404.245.4205, www.onstageatlanta.tix.com
‘All You Need Is Love’ and the Atlanta Gay Men’s Chorus wants to help bring it to you with a night of music from The Beatles. See them tonight and found out why they are recognized as the finest male choral groups in the world and are running 29 years strong. In addition to tonight’s performance, there will be two shows tomorrow. 8:00 pm, $20-$40, Rialto Center for the Arts 80 Forsyth St., 404.413.9849, www.agmchorus.org
Boy to Mad Man
Bryan Batt, star of AMC TV’s, Mad Men, reads from and signs his book, ‘She Ain’t Heavy, She’s My Mother’. The story is about a Southern woman who teaches her son everything he needs to know about becoming a man. 7:30 pm, Outwrite Books 991 Piedmont Ave., 404.607.0082, www. outwritebooks.com
Saturday, July 17 Sunday, July 18
Odd Man Out Theater Company invites you to enjoy some laughs by poking campy fun at some great masterpieces on stage. This Vaudville typed show mixes cabaret, belly dancing, jugglers, jesters and a little naughtiness. $20, 8 pm, 7 Stages Theater 1105 Euclid Ave., www.oddmanouttheater.com
Bon Nuit, Mes Amis Grab your beret and wear your best French couture tonight at Mary’s for the 6th annual Bastille Day celebration. Get ready for some French pop, French disco, and maybe a little…French kissing. 9 pm, Mary’s 1287 Glenwood Ave., 404.624.4411, www.marysatlanta.com
Dress light for it’s sure to be packed and HOT inside and on the dance floor. 10 pm, Atlanta Eagle 306 Ponce de Leon, www. atlantaeagle.com
‘Quench’ it Sunday afternoon in the outdoor courtyard of the Artmore Hotel. This T-dance will showcase DJ Chris Griswold at the tables. It’ll be so hot you’ll want to strip down, so bring your water guns! 3-7 pm, The Artmore Hotel 1302 West Peachtree, 404.876.6100, www.artmorehotel.com, www.billkaelin.com
Saturday night at the Eagle will never be the same as DJ Vicki Powell will make her debut tonight at Atlanta’s leather bar.
By Jesse Hancock, Editor
A lot has happened in 600 issues of David. In fact, a lot has happened in Atlanta during that time. The first issue as we know it today debuted in 1998 and was named after the famous statue by Michaelangelo. At that time Atlanta was still adjusting to its global recognition as host of the 1996 Olympic Games, and people were flocking to Atlanta. Straight people, gay people, all kinds of people. While Atlanta was becoming a welcoming destination for gay people, America had just found out Matthew Shepard had been brutally killed for being gay in Laramie, Wyoming. This tragic event brought tremendous focus nationwide against anti-gay violence. Just a few months later the Georgia Supreme Court ruled that the state could no longer arrest people for being gay. Five years later the Supreme Court made the same decision in Lawrence vs. Texas. That was a pretty progressive move for Georgia, in the heart of the South, to make in 1998. Being gay back then clearly wasn’t as accepted in the mainstream world as it is today, but it was time for Atlanta, especially Midtown, to make its mark as one of the most gay-friendly places in the world with David Magazine there to help welcome and guide readers along the way. As most people who were lived in Atlanta in 1998 will tell you, the club scene was 28 davidatlanta
very different. Locals and out-of-towners went to circuit parties, including he famous Hotlanta River Expo, a weekend of partying and white water rafting on the Chattahoochee. People came from all across the U.S., Canada, all over the world until outside competitors started creating other parties. And there was Backstreet, the mother of all private clubs. Because the laws were different back then, clubs were not required to close at 3 am, so people could stay out at Backstreet till sunup. And they did. They came to see Charlie Brown’s Cabaret. They came to see Raven, Shawnna Brooks, Heather Daniels, Lily White, who were all featured on HBO in a documentary: They came to see the hot boys. They came to dance the night away. They came for the drugs, alcohol and free spirited nights. They came until the neighbors had enough. When city officials and straight Midtown residents began protesting and targeting 24-hour private clubs like Backstreet and Blu, it wasn’t long before laws were changed, police raids became more prominent, and the crowds started to disperse. In July 2004 Backstreet was officially closed for good, leaving a huge void in Atlanta gay nightlife that many people feel will never be the same. Since then, only a handful of clubs have survived. Places like Blakes on the Park and Burkharts have continued to draw local and out-of-town crowds, but many
A Look Back at David Magazine and Gay Atlanta bars have come and gone or changed their name. For example, BJ Roosters used to be Buddies. In 2003 the closing time for bars and nightclubs changed, forcing partiers to restrain from drinking by a 2:30 curfew. While this law also affected straight clubs and partiers, it had a huge impact on gay nightlife. Since then bars and nightclubs have done their best to survive. Another blow was dealt to the gay community when the Atlanta Eagle was raided on September 10, 2009. On that night a paramilitary, SWAT-type force of Atlanta police officers stormed in without a warrant and forced patrons to lie face down in beer, dirt and broken glass. These were patrons who were not suspected of any criminal activity, yet they were illegally searched and held for thirty to ninety minutes. The police never explained why they were there, and when patrons asked questions, they were told to “shut the fuck up.” While the case is still in litigation, gay Atlanta has felt its impact. Anti-gay violence continues, despite the city appointing Danni Lynn Harris as the first LGBT liaison to the Atlanta Police Department during former Mayor Shirley Franklin’s reign and now Officer Patricia Powell to work with Harris as the second liaison. She was appointed recently by new Mayor Kasim Reed’s administration. Many people feel their impact on the gay community has yet to be felt. Time will tell.
On Nov. 16, 2009, David Magazine and Southern Voice were shut down when Windows Media, the parent company, went bankrupt, also forcing its other gay publications to close across the country. On Feb. 19, 2010, just a few months later, Gaydar, Inc., under the leadership of publisher Matt Neumann, purchased David and Sovo’s assets and ceased publication of Gaydar and relaunched David in March 2010. It then re-launched Sovo in April. Several other LGBT publications have launched during this time, including Georgia Voice, SBI, and Fenuxe, creating what some may call friendly competition while others describe as a media war. Nonetheless, all of these publications have the same simple goal: to provide a source of entertainment and information to the LGBT community. While Atlanta continues to be a goto destination for gays, there is still plenty of work to be done. The down economy has impacted the gay community, forcing some clubs to shut down or change their game immensely. Matthew Shepard’s parents now tour the country speaking on behalf of their son and urging people, gay and straight, to be better to each other. New laws are in the works against antigay discrimination. America waits to see if the government will repeal ENDA, Don’t Ask Don’t Tell, and DOMA, allowing gays to marry legally. David Magazine plans to be here along the way to inform, guide and entertain you. 29 davidatlanta
Monday, July 19 Wednesday, July 21
Atlanta natives, Amy Ray and Emily Saliers—The Indigo Girls, perform their third and fourth show in two days tonight. If you don’t have a ticket, you can still enjoy the show, dinner & drinks on the outdoor, enclosed patio via closed circuit TV’s. 7 and 9:30 pm, Eddie’s Attic 515 N. McDonough St., 404.377.4976, www.eddiesattic.com
Jonathon Lerner, a constitute member of the Weather Underground, reads from and signs his novel, ‘Alex Underground’. The fictional tale is about radical political views and finding oneself in the 1970’s— the era of sex, drugs, and revolution. 7:30 pm, Outwrite Books 991 Piedmont Ave., 404.607.0082, www.outwritebooks.com
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2002 -2005 HOT Spots Magazine’s second attempt of an Atlanta edition
ISSUES 2002 1968 Debut of the original David Magazine
David Atlanta sold to Unite Media in 2002, then merged with Window in 2003. Window and Unite were divisions of Avalon Partners Shirley Franklin elected mayor, promises to be an advocate of the gay community
Carma Productions launches Gay Community Yellow Pages
1985 – 2002 ETC Magazine (16 years, 8 months-the longest running magazine of this type in Atlanta)
1996 (Nov.) – 2003 (Oct. 31): Eclipse Magazine (started as insert in Impact, a New Orleans newspaper, changed in 1998 to stand alone in New Orleans Atlanta and Houston)
1997 (Aug. 17): Southern Voice sold to Window Media. The actual company name was Ryan Publications, named after the son of Chris Cash.
2003 Olympic bombing suspect Eric Robert Rudolph was arrested and charged in the 1996 Centennial Olympic Park bombing; 1997 bombings at a gay nightclub and a clinic that performed abortions in the Atlanta area; and a bombing at a clinic in Birmingham, Alabama, in 1998.
1998 (Oct. 1): First issue of David Atlanta (Editor: Dustin Tyler) (Oct. 12): Matthew Shepard killed in Laramie, Wyoming President Clinton signs executive order banning sexual orientation discrimination against civilian federal employees
Tammy Baldwin (D-Wisc.) is the first gay person elected to Congress
Georgia Passes Amendment 1 Banning Gay Marriage
Georgia Supreme Court strikes ban on
Amsterdam Bar opens
2005 Backstreet closed
2006 10th Anniversary of Atlanta Black Gay Pride
raid The Atlanta Eagle OCT 31st Atlanta Pride Feastival Returns to Piedmont Park (Nov.) Atlanta Free Press launches (Nov. 16) Windows Media shut down by government, David & SoVo cease publication (Dec.) Stage Door closes
2007 Aug Hoedowns closes Last Weekend Of June Atlanta Pride holds last Pride during the Summer in Piedmont Park Jungle changes name and format to Wild Mustang
2010 (Feb.) Kasim Reed elected, promises to be â€œeverybodyâ€™s mayor (Feb. 19) Gaydar, Inc. purchases David & SoVo assets (March) Georgia Voice launches (March 10) Gaydar ceases publication to re-launch David Magazine (April 16) SoVo resumes publication (April 28) SBI magazine launches (May) Southern Voice re-launches (May 19) David Magazine changes style format to become perfect bound (July) Carma Productions releases 20th edition of Gay Community
Simone Bell elected first African American lesbian state legislator
July 4th Weekend Atlanta Pride held at Civic center after being kicked out of Piedmont Park by the City of Atlanta. (Sep. 28): Wetbar closes, converts to straight bar (Sept.) Project Q Atlanta launched by Matt Hennie , Mike Flemming joins in Sept. 2009
2009 (Feb.) Debut of Gaydar magazine (Feb.) Debut of Pocket Rocket (Feb.) David Magazine increases format size under direction of editor Ryan Lee (Summer): Gaydar produces a Central Florida edition (Sept. 10): Atlanta Police and Red Dogs 37 davidatlanta
Mary Edith Pitts Whether you are a longtime Atlanta resident or a frequent patron of Burkhart’s you have likely heard of Mary Edith Pitts. She is the house diva at Burkhart’s and can be seen center stage entertaining the crowd with her quick wit and comedic performances. For Mary Edith, entertaining is not just a job, it’s a passion. Through her work over the past 20 years with the Armorettes, Homecoming, or even her most recent Birthday Benefit, she is a premier fundraiser for the Atlanta community. In 2007, after the passing of her best friend Kevin Early, Pitts began using her birthday as a fundraising opportunity to help individuals living with HIV/AIDS. When asked why, she said there were two main reasons, “…to honor the memories of my best friends Kevin and Barry and to take what was just another day for me and turn it into something meaningful.” “Growing up, my birthdays were never special, and as an adult, they didn’t have much meaning. When Kevin passed away shortly before my birthday, I found an opportunity to step outside of my own grief and honor the memories of him and Barry,” Pitts added, “I look forward to my birthday now because it has real meaning for me… I get to help others.” “Now, what I ask of everyone is instead of gifts, flowers, cakes or cards, to please bring me a tax deductible donation to help individuals living with HIV/AIDS.” Pitts’ first Birthday Bash in 2006 she raised $1,700. In 2007, she set a goal of $5,000, and she ended up raising $6,600. In 2008, Pitts decided to raise the bar and collected over $20,000. In 2009 she raised over $40,000 and this year she has set an ambitious, but reachable goal of $60,000. 38 davidatlanta
This year she has chosen Jerusalem House and The Grady Infectious Disease Program as recipient organizations. When asked why she chose these particular organizations, she stated they represent comprehensive healthcare and housing for individuals living with HIV/AIDS Regulars to Pitts’ shows know that her quote, “Stop the show!” has taken on a life of its own. It all started when a patron standing upstairs threw one dollar at her while she was hosting between numbers. Instinctively, and true to her comedic form, she yelled “Stop the show!” The audience went into hysterical laughter and cheers and more money was thrown at her to see her hilarious reaction. Over two years later, staying true to her fundraising efforts, she has been saving those dollars along with the monies collected from the Chattahoochee River Dance and the drinking of the .22oz… because, “it all adds up.” Mark your calendars and bring your checkbooks for a fundraiser filled with laughter and tears. Sunday July 25th @ 8PM will be a fundraising extravaganza featuring some of Atlanta’s finest entertainers including Wild Cherry Sucret, Tina Devore, Alicia Kelly, Ashley Kruiz, Savannah Leigh, Princess Charles, Brent Star, Regina Ryan, Destiny Brooks, Mariah, Anastacia, Shavonna B. Brooks, Trashetta GaLore and others. To find out more information about Mary Edith Pitts’ choice of organizations, please visit them online: Jerusalem House - www.jerusalemhouse.org Grady Infectious Disease Program - www. gradyhealthsystem.org/Specialties/specialties_idp.asp
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horoscopes ARIES TAURUS
You’re feeling extra zippy and ready to forslow almost anything lately You need to do whatever it takes down this week — so even if that slamming the Your brakes on some -get out theremeans and shake things up! creative mind projectit that lot to you. Things should pickfun. up makes muchmeans easier toa surmount obstacles and have great very soon, but progress this week is false.
You have every right to feel superior this week -- but that Open up andit’s take in another perspective — it around shouldyou be doesn’t mean a good idea to flaunt it! The people quite valuable totoyou! It’s athat good time of foregotism, you to so step are extra-sensitive anything smacks dialup it your efforts to two. show a friend or loved one that you are down a notch or totally on their side.
You’ve or two that you now, don’t mind sharing -- and Thingsgot areanaopinion little strained right but not so much those around youfigure shouldit be to engage them. that you can’t allready out. You do need to It’s try aagood few time for long, dynamic that might actually lead somewhere. experiments beforetalks you’re likely to know how to
You’ve got more coming at you right now than you expect -- so get ready! A bigare improvement is in the works, one that you and may Other people more than a little confused lately, know nothing about, and nowkeep is themisunderstanding time for the big unveiling. that could mean that they you — even fun! when you try to explain yourself! You may want to Have
proceed, so use your brain!
let it go until next week.
Your fiery sense of self is provoking you to tackle all kinds Don’t off half-cocked — or you need to of new run challenges -- at work, inright your now love life pretty much absorb theIt’s situation fully time before you up canand really make anywhere. an excellent to step ensure thatany the headway. and double-check. Once you know world knowsCheck your name. what’s going on, your actions should stick.
Those closest to you are very right nowif--you probably Your energy just right fordemanding now— especially have too much you so!isYou’ve to forward! step up Little and make your own big plans want to got push things should expectations clear, so that they can take their needs elsewhere conspire to help you out, so you can expect to meet all if they must. goals.
Your side isstate out and focusdifficult -- so make sure thatright you Your active emotional is ainlittle to handle surround with get all the right together people! It’s a really a good now. Seeyourself if you can things long enough to time group activities, andoryou’ve got more than bow for outbig of any big meetings appointments. It’s aenough good self-care that’s for sure! ideas to gotime, around.
Your social has definitely beensome working for you You’re not energy an egomaniac -- though misinformed — it’s a might great think timesotoright bury the make spectators now. Youhatchet, know you’re bestnew for contacts or even take the first step toward a new romanthe task at hand, and you don’t feel the need to spend much time tic entanglement. Why not? convincing others.
This not aof good time to bust out the credit or to A wildisabout stroke hits you just when you needyour itcards thesavings most -forget theluck long-term. If you can boost one you could never predict, so don’t go buying stocks or lottery this month, you are sure to appreciate your foresight in tickets. Thisfuture. could result in a big boost to your work or love life. the far-off
Try tofeel put as tooifmuch first impressions this week -Younot may your stock good in energy has been driving you there areweek’s liable to bemoment. serious errors! Superficial appearances to this big It could be an award or justare a extremely deceiving, take the time to really plumb depths. hint of praise from so exactly the right person, butthe now you know where to start building.
You’re feeling a little too settled in your thinking lately -- that This is anot a good forStill, struggles — at least notwith for is often danger sign week for you! you might want to roll you! to get friendscataclysm and colleagues to back you it for Try a while, as your the ensuing could have delightful up, but you may just need to hunker down and wait for a consequences! more auspicious day to fight back.
This is not the best time to offer advice, as it’s seen as unnecessary A stroke good you luckmeet. is more seems to be — by almost of anyone Holdthan on toit your gems of wisdom though that doesn’t mean you have tobeget to the bottom for a few more days, when people should more receptive. of it! You can just enjoy the good energy and give thanks to those who watch out for you.
Momma Mona Here we are again and as promised, here’s the scoop as to how I obtained the name Momma Mona. Very funny story. At least now. Years ago my daughter’s really smartass friend gave me that label after they unexpectedly came home to visit from college one weekend, and, rather late in the evening I might add. Oopphhs. Hence, Momma Mo(a)n-a was born. Guess it could have been worse.
Moving along, when I relocated to a condo situation here in Midtown and Wednesday night Wine & Weed (can I say this?) parties started to just happen in my garden, my much younger neighbor overheard me being addressed as Momma Mona and started introducing me as such to the many different guests he invited to join us. I was almost always the only female and certainly the only straight, which heightened my interest in everyone’s life, particularly their early life when they came to the realization that they were gay. This went on for several years and now I’m Momma Mona to more people than I can count. I’ll share more about these wonderful experiences and topics as we go along and as word count allows. Today’s question and advice was a very popular topic that came up time and time again. Enjoy and let me know what you think!
Dear Momma Mona, My life partner of 3 years has still to introduce me to his parents and 3 brothers because they do not approve of his “lifestyle” yet he still attends the once a year big family weekend gathering. By age 32, I think he should be more forthright and let things fall where they may. Am I right? ~Forthright in ATL Dear Forthright, There’s more than being forthright going on here. First, I would like to take the “right” and “should” out of the equation. If there’s a right going on, then there’s a wrong going on, too. Relationships become a little shaky when one partner claims to be in the right, so let’s get back on even ground. The use of the word “should” is just another divisional right-wrong argument, so let’s drop that one, too. What you are really saying is that you would like to be in your partner’s birth family sphere and he has not invited you there for whatever reason. You may even feel a little slighted by not having your partner status acknowledged by his birth family. While it appears that you entered this relationship knowing about and possibly accepting this situation, it is now becoming problematic for you. Why and why now? I must point out that this seems to be a popular issue for many gay couples. Over the years, Momma Mona has heard many stories about how parents and/ or siblings are the last to know about an individual’s sexual orientation and lifestyle, or the elephant in the middle of the room is simply not acknowledged and talked about. Sadly, many birth family bonds are
severed because of non-acceptance, or greatly stretched emotionally. And, rejection and ambivalence by a primary caregiver, according to attachment theory, are the most difficult emotional issues to overcome. Hence, avoidance, denial, secret partners, secret lives. Back to you. Momma Mona suggests that you thoroughly explore your thoughts and feelings (e.g. sad, angry, frightened, rejected, jealous, disappointed, insecure, etc.) about this matter without assigning right/wrong labels. Ask yourself why you are experiencing these emotions now. Is there something else going on in your relationship that is contributing to these emotions? Hopefully, your relationship with your partner is more open than his relationship with his birth family and you two can talk about it and be supportive of each other’s choices in this matter. If your partner chooses to continue his façade with his birth family for whatever his emotional reasons, then it is your choice to continue to accept/support or not accept/support at any point along your relationship life line. If, on the other hand, this birth family arrangement is causing your partner emotional distress, which in turn is the cause of your emotional stress, then please seek a professional counselor with expertise in the specific areas of gay identity and attachment theory. From the many stories Momma Mona has heard in regards to this type of situation, the support and comfort the partner provides is the catalyst to the other partner working through his birth family issues and the late 30s seem to be emotionally transitioning times developmentally (to give you some hope).
Email your questions to MommaMona@DavidAtlanta.com 62 davidatlanta
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Are we really ready for Gay Marriage? Part 2 “Will you Marry Me?”, Child what would you do if your boyfriend ask you that? Are you ready for all that? I mean..reealllly? I decided to do Part 2 because this is a serious issue---not just the fact that this county is ‘backwards’ for not allowing us to get married in most of the states, but my real concern is us being actually ready to walk down that damn isle if they DID green light those rights. Last column, I focused on the foundation which is ‘dating’. A lot of the kids don’t want to date anymore, they just want to ‘hook up’, do that do, or get done…now wait, ain’t nothing wrong with a little bump and grind, but for those of us who are ready for love and a relationship need to be reminded what grown folks used to say to us all the time, “Anything worth having is worth working for”. Bottom line, you have to date. Not only date, but date the right way. Marriage can be a long journey, so just like a long road trip, you want to have plenty of food, dranks, gas..wait, gas?!...well, you get the damn point. I gave you a few red flags to look for in the last issue which focused more on watching out for scrubs, bullshitters, and lame asses. This time I want to give you a few tips on what YOU need to do. It takes two boo. Karma: Karma is just as real as YOU. Fooling around with your friends’ boyfriend will eventually catch up with you. Oh you might think it’s cute at first because you’re getting away with it, guess what---no you’re NOT because Karma is far sneakier bitch than you. It’ll get you just when you thought you ‘finally’ found that someone. Why did I start off with ‘karma’ you may wonder, because I’m all about foundation. You have to do what’s right and practice that BEFORE you even get into a relationship or it’ll tear it apart. And you’ll see that karma will always be apart of your relationship. Check out the next tip. STOP PLAYING GAMES! Oh it’s cute to say “Oh really, since he didn’t answer the phone or return my text today, I’m going to ignore his ass for a week!” Um, you might want to a. stop jumping to conclusions all the time and find shit out first and b. stop trying to always ‘get even’. The danger of always trying to ‘get even’ is it could go on and on ruining both of you. Another example, “I think I’ll flirt with this guy over there to make him jealous for attention”, Ok, what are you going to do when HE tries to ‘get even’ and start making out with
someone in front of YOU? This isn’t dating, this is simply ‘playing games’ (not to mention childish). And like that commercial says, “When you play mind games, someone always gets hurt “(insert scary music). COMMUNICATION: This is one of my favorites. Actually, I don’t care what relationship you have with someone, communication is like water to a plant. Both of you NEED it to survive. “Oh, Leroy really pissed me off, I won’t even be home when he gets off work”…Um, maybe if you actually ‘talk’ to Leroy it’ll solve a lot of issues. Don’t be afraid to talk about anything. If you feel uncomfortable about certain topics or situations, I believe that you might be with the wrong one. Now if yall just met, that’s ok, but after a few months AND if this is the one you wanting to ‘marry’, then you better be able to talk about any thang! “Tom, your breath stank”. Hey, communication will make life much easier, TRUST me! . ALLOW SPACE: Don’t be afraid to let him do his ‘thang’ every once in awhile. Child, no one wants to feel like that can’t breathe! This includes, you must be able to ‘trust’ him and not get jealous every time he talks to someone. I’ve learned that if he’s going to cheat, there’s really nothing you can do about that. Just be honest and do YOUR part, pray about it, and don’t worry so much. And remember, YOU need your space too! Don’t loose yourself in this relationship. Meaning, don’t let anyone stop you from being you! Well that’s my time, before I go, I want to say THANK YOU all for showing me love for my birthday! In fact, that’ll be my next column, until next time, don’t read the girls, read The Brent Star Report!. Where to catch Brent Star: Where to catch Brent Star: Mondays at Blakes, Tuesdays at SHOUT, Saturdays at Tijuana Garage, Thursdays and Saturdays once a month at Burkharts and everywhere else that pays!
Video Request NightIndustry Night 9pm
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1544 Piedmont Avenue NE, Ste. 320 • Atlanta, GA 30324 Phone 404.888.9444 • F. 404.888.9666 • www.ansleyeyecare.com
the guide SEEN Lindbergh Dr.
ire esh Ch
16 10th St. 37,13,3
1510 Piedmont Avenue NE At Ansley Square www.oscarsatlanta.com
Pie dm on tA ve .
Spring St. W. Peachtree St. Peachtree St. Juniper St. Piedmont Ave.
6,11,21,35 15 36 1,2
25 40 175 38 39 Rd. 3 14 idge 19 Br
ay sw res p Ex
st ea rth o N 31 34
Amsterdam Ave. Virginia Ave.
Ponce De Leon Pl.
Peach tree R d.
Ponce de leon Ave.
Ralph McGill Blvd.
91 Broad Street SW 404.581.0577 www.91below.com
1. Amsterdam 502 Amsterdam Ave. 404-892-2227 myspace.com/amsterdamatlanta
18. LeBuzz 585 Franklin Rd. (Marietta) 770-424-1337 www.thenewlebuzz.com
36. Boy Next Door 1447 Piedmont Rd. 404.873.2264 www.boynextdoor.biz
2. Bellissima 560-B Amsterdam Ave. 404-917-0220 myspace.com/bellissima_lounge
19. Las Margaritas 1842 Cheshire Bridge Rd. 404-873-4464 www.lasmargaritasatl.com
37. Outwrite Bookstore & Cafe 991 Piedmont Ave. 404-607-0082
3. Blake’s on the Park 227 10th St. 404-892-5786 myspace.com/blakesonthepark
20. Mary’s 1287 Glenwood Ave. 404-624-4411 www.marysatlanta.com
4. BJ Roosters 2345 Cheshire Bridge Rd. 404-634-5895 www.bjroostersatl.com
21. Mixx 1492 Piedmont Rd. 404-228-4372
5. Bulldogs 893 Peachtree St. 404-872-3025
22. Model-T 699 Ponce De Leon Ave. 404-872-2209 www.modeltatlanta.com
6. Burkhart’s 1492-F Piedmont Rd. 404-872-4403 www.burkharts.com
23. My Sisters Room 1271 Glenwood Ave. SE 678-705-4585
7. Chaparral 2715 Buford Hwy. 678-886-3205 8. Club Europe 4001 Presidential Pkwy. 770-452-1240 www.thelionsdenatlanta.com 9. Club Opera 1150-B Crescent Ave. 404-872-1150 www.operaatlanta.com 10. Eagle 306 Ponce De Leon Ave. 404-873-2453 www.atlantaeagle.com 11. Felix’s 1510-G Piedmont Rd. 404-249-7899 12. Friends On Ponce 736 Ponce De Leon Ave. 404-817-3820 www.friendsonponce-atl.com 13. Gilbert’s 219 10th St. 404-872-8012 www.gilbertscafe.com 14. Heretic 2069 Cheshire Bridge Rd. 404-325-3061 www.hereticatlanta.com 15.HOBNOB 1551 Piedmont Ave. 404-968-2288 16. Joe’s on Juniper 1049 Juniper St. 404-875-6634 www.joesatlanta.com 17. Jungle 2115 Faulkner Rd. 404-844-8800 myspace.com/ jungle_bradwilliams
38. Poster Hut 2175 Cheshire Bridge Rd. 404-633-7491 PRIVATE SOCIAL CLUBS 39. Eros 2219 Faulkner Rd. 404-287-4482 34. Manifest 2103 Faulkner Rd. 404-549-2815
24. New Order 1544 Piedmont Rd. 404-874-8247 25. Opus 1 1086 Alco St. 404-634-6478 26. Phaze 1 4933 Memorial Dr. 404-296-4895 27. Swinging Richards 1400 Northside Dr. 404-352-0532 www.swingingrichards.com 28. 3 Legged Cowboy 931 Monroe Dr. 404-876-0001 www.3leggedcowboy.net 29. Tripps 1931 Piedmont Cir. 404-724-0067 30. Woofs 2425 Piedmont Rd. 404-869-9422 www.woofsatlanta.com GYMS/SPAS/BATHS 31. FLEX 76 - 4th St. NW 404-815-0456 32. Gravity Fitness 2201 Faulkner Rd. NW 404-486-0506 33. Workout Anytime 2140 Peachtree Rd. 404-351-3264 RETAIL/BOOKS/DVDS 34. Atlanta Leather Company 2070 Cheshire Bridge Rd. 404-320-8989
35. Brushstrokes/Capulets 1510 Piedmont Ave. 404-876-6567 73 davidatlanta
by David C. Muller
FIV E D O
r o f is
Once upon a time Luke went to a palm reader in Gwinnett County. The palm reader told him, “You must move to Atlanta, Luke, for you will find love there.” Luke went wandering around Midtown one Saturday afternoon. Physical fitness was important to Luke and he jogged into Piedmont Park just as a cool breeze swept down from the glistening glass high-rises and across the dried green expanse towards Grady High on the other side of Tenth and Monroe. Piedmont Park was brisk with foot traffic on the weekends. Luke had to dodge people walking dogs, children and the elderly as he ran along the paths and around the edge of Lake Clara Meed, past old people fishing for crappie and large mouth bass. Luke slowed his pace as he came up ‘round the curve of the lake and, while trying to catch his breath, he wiped his forehead on his shirt and walked across the foot bridge. In the Gazebo, there sat a solitary figure, a young guy, a good looking young guy, dressed in cut off shorts and wearing flip flips, sitting there, hidden behind a pair of purple sunglasses smoking… something. Luke wandered into the Gazebo and sniffed at the air, he said, “That sure doesn’t smell like a Marlboro Red.” “That’s because it’s m--------, you idiot.” “Oh,” Luke wandered in, “mind if I take a hit?” “Sit down,” he said, “try to be indiscreet.” Luke leaned against a pillar, he asked, “Who’re you? What’re you doing here?” “They call me Danny,” he passed the joint to 76 davidatlanta
Luke. “What’s your name?” “Luke,” he said, “Luke Covington.” “Oh, Luke, like that book in the Bible?” “Something like that, yeah.” Luke inhaled and passed the joint back to Danny, “You from around here?” Danny smoked, “I just came in off the Interstate.” “Where do you come from?” “I come from everywhere, and nowhere.” Luke felt dizzy in the head, he hadn’t smoked pot in years. “That’s good stuff, you get it locally?” “This is the Bible Belt. You can’t get anything like that down here.” Luke said, “Not according to what I hear.” “I had it shipped in from out west.” “I hear it’s legal out there.” “If only.” “You from out west?” “I used to live in ‘Frisco, but then,” Danny toked off the joint and passed what little was left to Luke, “I went down to Mexico and accidentally I poked a hole in a boat that belonged to a gangster.” Unlike former President Clinton, Luke actually did inhale, “Are you a criminal or something?” “Nah,” Danny shook his head, “I’m just a petty thief.” “What do you steal?” “Virginities.” Danny laughed, “Sometimes I steal money, one time I stole half a million dollars.”
y n n a D r w
r in G
eade alm r
p t to a
“Did you rob a bank?” “Are you kidding?” Danny scoffed, “I robbed an old woman.” “An old woman?” Luke took one last drag and held the funny cigarette out to Danny, “What were you doing robbing an old woman?” “It’s a long story.” Danny said, “After I poked a whole in that’s guy boat, I ran off, I fled the country and I went to the Middle East.” “Did you go to Abu Dhabi?” “Dubai, Kuwait, Iraq, Afghanistan, India, Thailand, Indonesia, Nicaragua and Brussels.” Danny tossed the joint into the lake, “I went to all those places.” “Some of those places aren’t in the Middle East, though.” “So what? What the hell do I look like, a professor of spelling?” “Why did you rob an old woman?” “Not just any old woman,” Danny lit a Newport light, “a Holocaust survivor.” “You robbed a Holocaust survivor?” “Well, not me, my friend robbed her. I just took the money afterward.” “What happened to your friend?” “Who, him?” Danny laughed, “The old bag shot him in the foot.” “Who?” Luke asked, “The old woman shot your friend in the foot?” “Yep.” “And then you took the money he got off the old
anta o Atl
en ove t m uke w t L s e mu tim "You on a , p m u i h Once r told here." e d a t re love palm The u will find o for y
lady?” “Well first we went to the beach and then I took the money.” Danny exhaled a smoke ring, “I went to Egypt after that.” “What happened to your friend?” “I just left him sitting there.” Danny laughed again, “Sittin’ on a beach.” Luke felt not only dizzy but paranoid all of the sudden, “Are you for real? Is there, like, a candid camera hidden around here somewhere?” “Dude,” Danny flicked some ash into the body of water surrounding the Gazebo, “I’m as real as rain.” Right then and there it started to rain in Piedmont Park. “And you stole money off a Holocaust survivor?” “I needed the money.” Luke shook his head, “You’re a horrible person. I don’t want anything to do with you.” “You’re cute,” Danny smiled, “You want to have dinner sometime?.” “Are you nuts?” Luke said, “I’d rather walk through a hail storm than talk to someone who freely admits he’s a petty thief and that he robbed some old people.” “If Bernie Madoff can do it,” asked Danny, “why can’t I?” And Luke ran off into the rain… NEXT EPISODE: “E is for Enigma” 77 davidatlanta
Red Chair - 2001
Woofs Grand Opening - 2002
Blu - 2002
Protect Your Monster
by Richard Marshall
bitch session Why does a certain club charge so much even at 2:30 a.m.?
Will Atlanta please turn on the AC? Seriously, you’re a moron. Period. Just because I am a drag queen doesn’t make me a tranny. I am probably more man than you will ever be. Why hasn’t someone opened up a real show bar in Atlanta? Don’t let show bars die along with Backstreet.
You stare at me at the bookstore but don’t say anything. It’s a bookstore not a library, speak up! Dear Bitch Session, while your page allows for a great place to vent, its title is stereotypical. At least put a cute bitch on it (dog). Can I staple your ass shut? Only if I can staple your mouth shut. Deal, you use your ass more than I use my mouth! I have had enough of these uncut penises!!! What am I gonna do with all that extra skin? It’d make a cute throw rug I guess. Why is it that no one ever comes through for you right when you need them to?! Ugh!!
(2004) I don’t know whether to laugh or cry when I see ads on sex sites from guys seeking only HIV-negative partners. Do they honestly think that is going to keep someone who is (knowingly or unknowingly) HIV-positive from answering their ad, and allow them to have unprotected, risk-free sex? (2008) Why can’t men wear tight pants like they did in the ‘70s? (2006) If you’re only into “straight acting” guys, you should remember that acting is being something you’re not. Take it up with your therapist or direct your anger where it belongs: toward your mother. I’ll take a confident “sissy” over a fake fag any day! (2004) Yes, the person with HIV/AIDS is terminally ill. But the last time I checked, death was certain for all of us. (2008) Why do you need marriage? Financial benefits? Wanna be like your breeder counterparts? Gay marriage will never be legal because there is no need to be married to screw everyone in sight. Spare me the drama, queens! (2004) Please boys, if you’re going to strip in the bars (or dance under that theme) at least get rid of the baby fat and go to a gym once in a while. It’ll take more than a cute face to earn my dollar.
I’m so sick of being called (2008) Granted, the drugs “lipstick” because I look Paula Abdul takes make LIKE A GIRL and not her incapable of speaking like a rejected version of a Hollister model circa intelligently, but how is that 2007. any different from you? (2006) Why can’t straight men shop for their own underwear? I’m tired of browsing the racks with ugly, middle-aged women?
(2007) I’m tired of being honest. All I want is a halfway decent guy to have sex with tonight.
(2007) If you don’t want to tip at all, then you get what you pay for. Cook the food, bring the food to the table, and then clean up after you’re done. In other words, eat at home!
(2006) Twinks are no fun in bed. It’s like humping a cardboard cutout. Give me a big furry bear any day of the week. Woof!
98 david davidatlanta atlanta
David Magazine | Atlanta Issue 600