Darling Magazine - North Surrey - Spring 2018

darling SPRING 18 PRICELESS

#100years OUR LOCAL LEGENDS

SOCIAL CLIMBERS

ON TOP OF THE WORLD

A trek through the Atlas

Hill House Interiors

MY LITTLE PONY Giddyup Kids!

PURPLE PATCH Charlotte’s Spring Fashion

CHEF’S TABLE Nesan’s Supper Club

GOLDEN GIRLS Georgie Twigg Exclusive

LOOKING AT ELDERLY CARE PARENTS UNITED Elaine’s Top Tips living & lifestyle in north surrey

DAMAGE CONTROL Hart Brown’s Divorce Guide SEX, LIES & VHS The Kate Greenhalgh Column |

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Dear Darling Reader, First of all, a big thank you to our amazing outgoing Editor, Philippa Hennessy. Six years ago, Philippa set up Darling Magazine Cobham & Esher and it’s grown so popular we’ve had to rename it ‘North Surrey’. Well done Philippa, you really are an inspiration.

Cover Girls: Helen Bygraves and Jenny Weiss from Hill House Interiors

Publisher Darling Magazine UK Karine Torr Editor Karine Torr 020 8739 0059 Advertising 07930 396356 Email northsurrey@darlingmagazine.co.uk Contributors Holly Candlish Kate Greenhalgh Darling Wimbledon Karine Torr 020 8739 0059 Darling Kingston & Richmond Marja-Leena Toseland 07802 949836 Design Director Hermina Williams design@herminawilliams.com Website Design charlieapple.co.uk Printer Aquatint scott@aquatint.co.uk Distribution Right Distribution Whilst every care has been taken to ensure that the data in this publication is accurate, neither the publisher nor its editorial contributors can accept, and hereby disclaim, any liability to any party to loss or damage caused by errors or omissions resulting from negligence, accident or any other cause. Darling Magazine does not officially endorse any advertising material included within this publication. All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in any retrieval system, or transmitted in any form – electronic, recording or otherwise, without prior permission from the publisher.

Darling aims to inspire by featuring the stories of women who have accomplished the extraordinary in their personal and professional lives. Our ‘cover girls’, Helen Bygraves and Jenny Weiss, friends and partners of the successful Hill House Interiors, definitely inspire me.

Discover the secrets of their personal and business success on (pg5).

More inspiration comes from the gritty Surrey women who faced brutal conditions when they climbed the highest peak in the Atlas mountain range (pg38). Rather them than me! From the snow-capped mountains of Morocco to the sun-drenched beaches of Rio, golden girl, Georgie Twigg relives highlights of winning Olympic Gold and reveals her European dreams for Surbiton Hockey Club (pg16). Talk about women reaching their potential #100years, we finally got the vote and local hero Ethel Smyth had us marching to a different tune (pg12).

We can all do with more laughter in our life. Read Kate Greenhalgh’s razor-sharp column (pg45). Not many writers can make you laugh out loud, but this clever lady really can. There’s lots more to enjoy in this spring read. Remember to contact me with your interesting stories and your events for our popular social pages.

Happy days, until summer…

Features Editor, Holly Candlish | hollycandlish@gmail.com Editor-in-chiefs Karine Torr and Marja-Leena Toseland northsurrey@darlingmagazine.co .uk

CONTENTS 5 9 11 12 15 16 19 20 23 24 25 27 28 31 32 34 37 38 40 45

Inspiring women. Our Hill House Superstars Darling stylist Charlotte picks purple for spring Beauty review – going under the micro-needling pen Celebrating the centenary of the women’s vote The Really Helpful Club, your online network Darling meets hockey royalty, Georgie Twigg World-class cricket centre opens at Reeds School Trotting along to Shetland Pony Club Schools in the News – presenting a united front Easter lamb recipe on Cook’s Corner The run-up to BBQ season with Parties to Go Haute Indian Cuisine on our doorstep Celeb Supper Club Chefs for your special occasions Expert advice on moving the elderly Keeping kids fit at David Lloyd Club, Brooklands Hart Brown Solicitors on divorce where kids are involved Designer, Gabi Da Rocha’s top tips on finishing touches Surrey’s intrepid explorers on Moroccan adventure On the Scene – our social pages Kate Greenhalgh’s Point of View

darlingmagazine.co.uk | spring 2018

3

Sarah Ollerenshaw – I Heard your Voice on the Wind

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inspiring women

“In Xanadu did Kubla Khan a stately pleasure-dome decree”

He would, of course, have had Hill House Interiors in mind to design it.

Holly Candlish interviews founders Helen Bygraves and Jenny Weiss How did you expand the business?

JW: Word of mouth. Also, our Baker Street showroom in Weybridge means that people can pop in and buy a lamp, rug or candle even if they don’t need their whole house renovated. Our offices sit over it meaning we keep in touch with the community.

HB: In the same way as having the Weybridge premises, the Chelsea showroom put us on the map in London. It’s just like a village up there and 40% of our business is now in London.

Jenny Weiss

Helen Bygraves

F

rom New York to New Delhi, Kazakhstan to KT13, Hill House Interiors is recognized as an industry leader throughout the world. With an impressive portfolio of international projects and a long list of industry awards, I was anticipating meeting two uncompromising businesswomen. But I was wrong. Life-long business partners and friends, Helen Bygraves and Jenny Weiss, are in reality warm, funny and passionate about their work.

That’s not to say they aren’t immaculately dressed and beautifully styled, but they laugh long and hard over a glass of wine while enthusiastically discussing their work and recounting lots of gossipy stories. They’re fun. But ultimately discreet. Along with their faultless sense of style and elegance, that’s why the rich and famous have their numbers on speed dial.

How did you get together?

JW: We went into business together on a trial basis, to see if we got on. Both of us had small property development companies and we knew each other first as friends. 20 years later we are celebrating our anniversary and the rest is history.

HB: It’s like a marriage, except we’ve outlasted a few of those! Today we employ 23 people including 12 designers and three architects plus we have numerous artists, craftsmen and trades that we regularly work with.

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What is the signature Hill House style?

HB: I would say timeless elegance but there is an unmistakable touch of glamour in everything we do.

What do you think of Hygge and Shabby Chic?

JW: Moving on ….! No that’s not entirely true.

‘Shabby’ is the polar opposite of our style but that doesn’t stop us creating a comfortable and relaxed home. We would use organic fabrics, textures and lighting to establish a relaxing atmosphere.

How do you complement each other?

JW: We generate an idea from nature, eg a Gingko leaf, a tiger ….

HB: … and I imagine that as an 8.5m crystal chandelier or as handcrafted bronze panels and then we work out together how that will get made.

And installed. So we’ve ended up visiting a disused train hanger in Poland to view the assembly of a chandelier.

JW: Or, we’ve created an installation across the 3 domes of a hydraulic pool to replicate the solar system consisting of 3,500 pieces of blue, amethyst and silver pieces of glass.

Where do your fantastic ideas take you?

JW: Some far-flung spots. We use artisan glass blowers in the Czech Republic, embroidery and seamstresses from India, brass sculptors in Moscow.

HB: We encourage clients to be adventurous and inventive and to take it as far as practicality and budget will allow. What we’re discussing here is the couture of interior design. Some of our best work is secret and sadly we can’t even discuss it!

darlingmagazine.co.uk | spring 2018

5

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inspiring woman header

Describe your dream client.

JW: We had a recent ‘captain of industry’ who fell in love with a self-playing piano in our showroom and ordered it in his favourite colour. Ferrari Red. We went on to design the interiors of his Southbank duplex based around the red piano.

The original space featured in the party scene in the AbFab movie.

HB: Being a successful interior designer is about giving the client what they want in a tasteful and stylish way. Even in Ferrari red! The client is so happy that we’ve moved on to design his apartment in Tribeca.

Any horror stories?

JW: We had to hand in our passports and phones to security when we worked on a palace in Kazakhstan. A little scary!

Are there any dream jobs left?

HB: We have designed Superyachts, Spas and boutique hotels but we’d like to decorate a ski chalet.

With numerous industry awards, which are you proudest of?

HB: We have featured 9 times in the Andrew Martin Interior Design Review. This is the bible of the interior’s world because he only selects a handful of designers to be featured out of the 15,000 entries he receives worldwide.

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Who does your hair and where do you buy your clothes?

JW: Santo in Ripley is my hair doctor and we both love Piajeh (Weybridge) because she’s an amazing buyer. I love buying on our travels; especially the Hamptons and LA. HB: A local hairdresser, Grace, does my hair twice a week. It’s my indulgence. And, the joy of traveling to Paris and Milan for the design shows is shopping.

Is it true that you take part in Panto?

JW: Yes. The interior design industry gets together to perform a pantomime for charity. Last year it was ‘Jack and the Blingstalk’!

HB: I went to theatre school as a child so being on the West End stage in panto is a dream come true.

I dance, sing and in Peter Pan, I even fly.

JW: I love being in panto – the sets, the hair, the make-up!

What would you tell your 20 year old self?

HB: Life isn’t a sprint. It’s a marathon and a journey.

JW: Don’t be so worried about what people think of you, trust your instinct, find your passion and follow your dreams … they know the way. hillhouseinteriors.com 01932 858 900

darlingmagazine.co.uk | spring 2018

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Purple Passions

A galaxy of peaceful purple hues tantalises us this spring.

Personal Stylist, Charlotte Broadbent, selects her favourite pieces.

Norton Circle Bag £20, Accessorize

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To discover your best colours & most flattering shapes, contact Charlotte Broadbent, personal stylist.

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beauty review

Cindy Gives Me

PINS AND NEEDLES Darling Editor Marja-Leena Toseland goes under the pen

I

s there anything we middle-aged women won’t do to keep our skin in tip top condition? I had agreed to test an invasive facial treatment for the first time and was a little nervous I admit. My face and neck was about to be pricked with needles which would leave my skin looking red and sore for a couple of days.

Before we started the treatment, Cindy, a licensed and experienced aesthetician and owner of The Luxury Touch clinic, explained in detail what the 90 minute CIT (Collagen Induction Therapy) or Microneedling treatment would entail. She offers a fantastic package, making sure that you get the best possible results from her treatments. She starts by analysing the condition and thickness of your skin; crucial for safe and effective results.

She performed microdermabrasion first in order to remove dead skin cells and dirt, this will help the aftercare products to work at their optimum level in healing the skin. Cindy used the latest technology Dermapen to perform CIT and pharmaceutical grade iS Clinical products and recommend these for home care after CIT. Microneedling would be very uncomfortable without an application of a powerful local anesthetic. Cindy’s clinic is one of a very few to use this high-grade product. She is also unique in giving you a fantastic 30 minute massage whilst waiting for the anesthetic to take effect.

She has even massaged Vladimir Putin and has worked on many A-list clients in 5* spas during her career.

CIT is a regenerative method that improves our skin’s structure. The very fine needles are used to create superficial wounds that stimulate the skin to renew itself, without causing significant damage on epidermal tissue.

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It’s proven to treat wrinkles, lines, and other types of scaring. Four to six sessions are needed, and the results will last up to two years.

When I finish writing this I have had two treatments and my skin is already looking a lot smoother and more toned. I can’t wait till I’ve had my fourth treatment and my skin has fully recovered. I just have to be extra careful in the sun and wear sun screen all year round.

For further information and prices visit theluxurytouch.co/about

darlingmagazine.co.uk | spring 2018

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darling special

#100years

and still fighting

Darling Editor Karine Torr, celebrates our local heroines, past and present

A

t this moment in time, I feel awash with hashtags. #100years, #MeToo, #instawomen, #feminism, #GirlsLikeUs, #EverydaySexism, Emma Watson’s #heforshe campaign, #Fem2, #genderequality – the list is endless. It’s an exciting time for women, not only in the UK - the worldwide women’s movement is really gaining ground. There are young movements like Frances Scott’s #50:50parliament (men outnumber women 2:1 in Parliament) and Jude Kelly’s fantastic annual WOW Festival (Women of the World) at London’s Southbank and especially, The Women’s Equality Party, a liberal feminist political party in the United Kingdom that was founded by Catherine Mayer and Sandi Toksvig at the WOW Festival 2015. They felt strongly that there was a need for a political party in the United Kingdom to campaign for gender equality to the benefit of all.

There are 32 million women living in the UK, they account for 51% of the population. Women make a massive contribution to society in their paid and unpaid work. They merit fair representation and inclusion in the most important decision-making institution in our country.

Even our own London Mayor, Sadiq Khan is getting behind the hashtag with his very own #BehindEveryGreatCity, making gender equality a big focus for 2018.

Suffragette Magazine gives angelic status to Emily Davison. Suffragettes were members of women’s organization movements in the late 19th and early 20th century, particularly militants in Great Britain. Only in 1928 suffrage was extended to all women.

Ethel Smyth, poster of The March of the Women, from Surrey History Centre

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spring 2018 | darlingmagazine.co.uk

S

o it seems appropriate 100 years later, to celebrate the life of a Surrey legend, Ethyl Smyth. Darling would like to thank Dr Christopher Wiley of the University of Surrey for sharing this wonderful story.

Dame Ethel Smyth (1858–1944) lived most

A stamp printed in Great Britain dedicated to the national portrait gallery, shows Emmeline Pankhurst

by Georgina Brakenbury, circa 2006

processions, addressing rallies, and developing a close relationship with Pankhurst herself.

It was Smyth who taught Pankhurst to throw stones to hit their target, and in 1913 Pankhurst was even arrested at Smyth’s house.

Smyth’s suffragette activity was reflected in the music she composed in the early 1910s, and particularly in her song ‘The March of the Women’. Quickly adopted as the suffragette anthem, it was sung during rallies to rouse the crowds, as well as to boost morale in prison during periods of imprisonment and hunger striking. The artwork presented the ‘March’ in the traditional suffragette colours: violet for dignity, white for purity, and green for hope. of her adult life in Surrey, first in Surrey Heath and subsequently in Hook Heath, near Woking, from 1910. History tends to remember her primarily as a pathbreaking composer of six operas and many other orchestral, chamber, and vocal works. This was an impressive output given that the music profession was then fiercely maledominated; it was extremely unusual at the time for a female composer to have enjoyed a successful international career. In later years, Smyth developed parallel activity as a writer of memoirs, biographical sketches, and polemical essays on the music profession, publishing a total of ten books.

Yet the area in which she had arguably the greatest impact lay not in music or literature, but in politics. In September 1910 she heard a speech delivered by Emmeline Pankhurst, the leader of the Women’s Social and Political Union, and pledged to devote two years of her life to the ‘Votes for Women’ campaign.

She became a leading suffragette, heading

Picture credit: Lewis Orchard Collection Ref.9180, courtesy of Surrey History Centre.

In 1912, Smyth served a jail sentence in London’s Holloway Prison, having been arrested along with many other suffragettes for taking part in a window-smashing campaign across the West End. Visiting her in prison, the conductor Thomas Beecham witnessed a group of suffragettes singing Smyth’s ‘March’ while exercising in the yard, with the composer herself frantically attempting to beat time from her cell window using her toothbrush as a baton! Smyth’s last official act for the suffragettes also saw her conducting the ‘March’, in 1930, performed by the Metropolitan Police Band at the unveiling of the memorial statue to Pankhurst in Victoria Tower Gardens, adjacent to the Palace of Westminster.

Smyth is to be commemorated by her home town in this year’s Celebrate Woking festival, ensuring that her fascinating story as a pioneering female composer and suffragette continues to inspire new generations.

darlingmagazine.co.uk | spring 2018

13

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sport

The

BESTof the BEST

Darling Magazine’s Holly Candlish caught up with Olympic gold medalist, Georgie Twigg, ahead of this year’s EuroHockey Cup at Surbiton Hockey Club in May

Surbiton Ladies First Team celebrating becoming National Champions 2017

S

ince the women’s team Olympic Gold at Rio 2016, the sport of hockey has been enjoying enormous levels of success. Who can forget the nail-biting drama of the penalty shoot-out to determine the final podium positions between GB and the Netherlands? In a bid to sustain this level of interest Surbiton Hockey Club are proudly hosting this year’s EuroHockey Women’s tournament from 17th-20th May. “We are excited to be staging this top-class event for the first time in the UK. Surbiton will be buzzing with sports fans eager to see some of the best clubs in the world. Having done so well at the Olympics there’s a bigger hockey fan

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spring 2018 | darlingmagazine.co.uk

base than ever and this will keep it in the public eye and inspire the next generation of players, “says Georgie Twigg, Olympic gold medalist and Surbiton mid-fielder.

It’s no surprise that Surbiton, the second oldest club in the world, is hosting this prestigious European event as their playing record sets the team head and shoulders above other UK clubs. The line-up is impressive. Fellow Olympic gold medallists, Holly Webb and Giselle Ansley join Twigg, with a further four international players contributing to their success. National champions four years in a row, the team has enjoyed an unbeaten run of 52 matches. Surbiton Ladies 1s are the best of the

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Photography by Tim Reder

header

Georgie Twigg in action

best and relish the opportunity of showing local supporters just how good they are. Event-goers can undoubtedly expect to see world-class hockey.

The strong field includes over 40 Olympians and teams from Holland, Germany, Spain, Ireland and Belarus. “They are the strongest teams in Europe, but it is the Dutch who are the main competition,” says Georgie, “however, after the win at Rio, I feel more confident about facing them in the Euros.”

Team GB’s performance at Rio was truly inspiring and Georgie is happy to relive the closing moments of the tense - if you were watching from your sofa - final.

“It’s all a bit surreal. We knew if we kept it tight, and kept the score-line tight, then we stood a chance. With the final whistle we were tied 3-3 and it came down to penalties. At this point our captain ran up shouting, ‘Yes, we’ve got this girls!’

We’d beaten them before on penalties, so going into it our hopes were really high. It doesn’t make it any easier, but when Holly (Webb) stepped up I was actually very confident. The Dutch goalkeeper hadn’t seen her take a penalty before and didn’t have a clue what she was about to do. She was our secret weapon. The goal was a euphoric moment with us all running together screaming and crying.“ Since reaching the pinnacle of her sporting dreams winning Olympic Gold, 27 year old Georgie has retired from the international stage and has set herself different goals both on and off the playing field. “I now have a normal working

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week training to be lawyer in London. Legal books have replaced the Monday-Friday training at Bisham Abbey National Sports Centre. On the sports front, taking Surbiton to the top and inspiring young people to take up the sport is now my goal.”

To encourage young players, Surbiton trains more than 900 colts each week and is well known for its youth development programme. “For instance, Team GB player, Sarah Haycroft started playing at Surbiton aged ten and now at 26 years old captains the Ladies 1s,” she explains. “Teenagers regularly train and play with us in the first team. We want to nurture young players and inspire them. We are offering free entry to school children on the first day of the Euros to give them the opportunity to enjoy top level hockey first hand.”

In the Olympics, Team GB had every confidence they would win and Georgie is certain that the home crowd will be a deciding factor for Surbiton HC at the Euros. “The Dutch are our nemesis and it is current champions HC‘s-Hertogenbosch from the Netherlands that we most fear. They always do well; they always win it. But we’re hoping with a home advantage, with our crowd on our home pitch, this is our year to win it.”

To book tickets: https://www.seetickets.com/event/eurohockeyclub-cup-women/-/1194239/ For the school’s discount code contact: jobrownatjays@yahoo.co.uk

darlingmagazine.co.uk | spring 2018

17

S c h o o l

Details of forthcoming Open Mornings are available on our website www.reeds.surrey.sch.uk “A good education is a fortune a child can never spend” Andrew Reed, who established Reed’s School’s Charitable Foundation 1813

community

Reed’s School opens its world-class

Indoor Cricket Centre

Alec Stewart OBE declares it the best he’s seen in England!

The The Jarrett Jarrett Indoor Indoor Cricket Cricket Centre Centre

A

lec Stewart OBE was the guest of honour who opened the new Jarrett Indoor Cricket Centre at Reed’s School this spring. Nearly 200 guests gathered to celebrate the new facility which features cutting-edge technology and building design.

Alec Stewart told the guests, “The new Indoor Cricket facility at Reed’s is the best I have seen in England and that includes all the 1st class counties too. It’s of the highest order!

Congratulations to you all; these world-class facilities have the potential to produce top quality players for Surrey and also for England.”

The building is named in honour of David Jarrett, former Headmaster of Reed’s School, who was the first man to achieve double blues from both Oxford and Cambridge Universities in Cricket.

Mark Hoskins, Hoskins, David David Jarrett Jarrett and and Alec Alec Stewart Stewart OBE OBE Mark

Local cricketing legend and world-class fast bowler, Bob Willis, also came along to join in the celebrations and view the new facility. He recalled that as an RGS, Guildford schoolboy he scored his only century on one of Reed’s Schools’ cricket pitches!

The centre features 5 lanes which are customised to replicate wicket conditions at major grounds around the world. They are also fitted with PitchVision technology, which provides real-time video and performance analysis for players of all levels, from beginners to professionals. The Jarrett Cricket Centre is the first facility in the UK to have this technology integrated into its construction from build level.

Over a dozen local clubs already utilise the facility - from Juniors to Seniors including a number of girls teams and courses are up and running for children of all abilities from the ages of 6 to 17.

Keith Medlycott, cricket professional at Reed’s who is running the centre, commented “Clubs and schools in the area are welcome to come along to a taster session to try out the facilities here. We are also running Masterclass sessions or courses, open to all, designed to specialise in certain skill sets within the game. Our aim is to ensure the whole community can benefit – adults who would like to play should note that we’ll be running six-a-side Indoor League in the summer!”

A unique philanthropic enterprise, all profits generated from lettings will go directly to provide educational and pastoral support for children through the Reed’s Foundation. The Foundation, originally called the London Orphan Asylum, was established in 1813 to help financially disadvantaged children who have lost the support of one or both parents. Since it was founded over 12,000 children have had their lives transformed thanks to the Foundation; this work continues today at Reed’s School. reeds.surrey.sch.uk

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darlingmagazine.co.uk | spring 2018

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kids

Pony dreams can come true!

A joy for children all over Surrey

D

oes your child dream of unicorns, cowboys, Olympic gold medals or a pony of their own? Do you love horses yourself and maybe rode when you were younger?

Would you like your child to be more connected with nature, take responsibility, behave better, love animals, have fun, gain confidence, keep active, be calm and relaxed and feel a sense of accomplishment from learning a new skill?

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Your child can do all of this and more through learning to ride a horse or pony. There is growing evidence to suggest that being active outdoors and connecting with an animal has many benefits beyond the physical. According to the researchers, one of the most important realizations that looking after and being with animals gave to children was the understanding that, by taking care of animals, they learned to take care of

spring 2018 | darlingmagazine.co.uk

themselves as well. Adults also benefit from bonding with a horse and spending time in a green environment.

Teenagers’ mental health can also be helped from being with ponies in the countryside.

So where should you go?

Why not try Shetland Pony Club, a hidden gem in Surrey, where the magic of 18 delightful Shetland ponies can make your family’s pony dreams come true. At their

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Ranch in Cobham, children as young as 2½ years old can ride the adorable Shetland ponies through their beautiful countryside. Enjoy the changing seasons with grassy meadows and bluebells giving way to wildflower meadows then cornfields and stubble. It’s a quintessentially English experience, where tweed clad helpers guiding at your child’s pace, ensure that your little ones create a bond with their Shetland pony and love as they learn.

Adults enjoy an enriching sense of wellbeing and connection too, through Shetland pony walking in the wonderful rural surroundings. It’s something different and requires no prior knowledge - just a love of animals and a desire to connect.

Rosemary and the team at Shetland Pony Club are passionate about ponies and the countryside and their mission is to support more parents and children around the world connect with horses and ponies.

They are beginner’s specialists helping over 7,000 children start riding and want to help more people connect with animals and nature.

Children can enjoy gentle Starter Rides, meeting and brushing their cute Shetland pony before riding him around the delightful meadows with their helper.

They can learn pony care too on Pony Mornings. There’s delightful pony birthday parties and their legendary pony summer camps too. Teenagers, too can benefit physically and mentally by helping out with the ponies at the ranch.

If you love ponies but are not able to visit, Shetland Pony Club can bring the wonderful world of ponies to you. Why not enjoy the Club online by Adopting a Shetland Pony, or help your child learn horse riding with their online courses, that help set parents on the right path with ponies, wherever they are in the world.

The benefits of connecting with ponies and nature are becoming increasingly important in today’s busy world and Shetland Pony Club is the perfect place for all the family to start. shetlandponyclub.co.uk

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darlingmagazine.co.uk | spring 2018

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The outstanding and independent prep school for girls aged 2-11 Claygate, Surrey.

Contact us to arrange a visit

OUR Open MorningS Thursday 10 May 2018 Thursday 1 November 2018 9.30am-11.30am

Call: 01372 462627 Email: school.registrar@ rowanprepschool.co.uk Register online: rowanprepschool.co.uk

EDUCATION IN THE NEWS SPONSORED BY KNIGHT FRANK knightfrank.co.uk/cobham

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GOOD COP, BAD COP

Having a united front is the holy grail of parenting, says Elaine Halligan of The Parent Practice. Here are her top tips on communicating with your partner to find unanimity on tricky family issues

By Philippa Hennessy

A

s parents, presenting a united front is not always easy – there is often one parent who does not uphold the mealtime rules, allowing the children sweets before dinner or to stay up past their bedtime. If one is more authoritarian and the other has a more laissez-faire approach, how on earth do you achieve any consensus?

It’s difficult to get children to be cooperative if the family rules are not being upheld by both parents.

A UNITED FRONT CAN GO A LONG WAY • If your children are very young, agree on a strategy for teaching them how to dress themselves or how to react when they have a tantrum.

• Agree on the rules and boundaries in different situations, whether it is at meal time, on excursions or away on holiday.

• Acknowledge your partner’s point of view when it differs to yours.

• Compromise when there is disagreement consistency is more important than the actual rule.

• When there is conflict with your partner, do not criticise but make requests and explain your needs.

• Respect each other’s commitments outside the home and family life by taking into consideration how much free time one of you may have from day-to-day.

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• Complement each other on matters that relate to your children, such as backing each other up when one of you is enforcing a rule.

• Avoid criticising and arguing with each other in front of the children. Instead, say positive things to/about your partner in front of them - should you need to discuss a contentious issue, then it is best to wait until the children are not in earshot or in bed.

• Consult your partner before making promises to the children.

• It is normal behaviour for children to play you off each other, particularly when one of you says “no” to something.

Elaine Halligan is the London director of The Parent Practice, an organisation that delivers positive parenting skills to enable parents to bring out the best in their children theparentpractice.com

darlingmagazine.co.uk | spring 2018

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COOK’S CORNER Spicy Spring Leg of Lamb with a Carrot and Cumin Salad partiestogo.co.uk Ingredients for Spiced Leg of Lamb • 3 sticks lemon grass • 5 cm piece fresh root ginger, peeled & chopped • 5 cloves garlic, peeled & chopped • 6 lime leaves • 1 good pinch ground cumin • Zest and juice of one lemon • sea salt • cracked black pepper • 1 leg of lamb, boned & butter-flied Method Light the BBQ, ensuring you have plenty of coal.

Prepare your marinade: Peel and chop the ginger and garlic. Cut the Lemongrass in half, lengthways and then add the lime leaves. Grate 1 lemon and collect the zest, and squeeze its juice, then add the cumin.

Carole Cory

Carrot and Cumin Salad

A refreshing salad that will complement the lamb and bring the plate alive with the taste of summer.

Ingredients • 2 tsp Cumin Seed, toasted • Zest and Juice of 1 lemon • 5cm long piece of ginger grated • 5tbsp Olive Oil • 3 Shallots, very finely sliced • 5 carrots grated • Small bunch of coriander, chopped • Small bunch of mint, chopped.

Method Combine all the ingredients in a bowl and season to taste.

Season your lamb with salt and cracked black pepper. Then rub your meat with the marinade and leave to rest for at least 3 hours.

Once the lamb has marinated place it on the BBQ, fat side down, and cook for 5 minutes until it has browned. Flip it and cook for a further 5 minutes to sear the other side.

Move the coals to the side of the BBQ to reduce the heat under the meat and cook steadily for 30-40 minutes, turning so it does not burn. Cook the meat for this long to achieve rare, pink meat.

Remove from the BBQ and wrap in foil, and let it rest for 15 minutes.

TIME FOR A PARTY?

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Bespoke Party Planning

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spring 2018 | darlingmagazine.co.uk

t: 020 8947 8350 m: 07974 769687 lorraine@lorraine-walters.co.uk www.lorraine-walters.co.uk

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catering promo

BBQ Brunch A Go Go Spring is here and Parties to Go has spent the winter preparing a host of delights to wow you and get you in the mood

S

o, we all know brunch is the best meal of the day. This is of course down to the alcoholic beverages at 12:00; the boozy, bourbon milkshakes we make are particularly good!

Here at Parties to go we offer BBQ brunch that will make any event one to remember.

Have your guests met at the door with a Mimosa or one of our milkshakes, made by our cocktail barman.

We will tempt your friends, colleagues and loved ones with our leek and apple sausages, bacon, and hotcakes; all grilled over the embers in our charcoal BBQs. You can relax and enjoy Eggs Benedict with smoked salmon and chives, American style blueberry pancakes, chorizo hash, spinach baked eggs

to name just a few of our delicious recipes. Sipping on a freshly made fruit smoothie you can rest easy knowing the Parties to Go team has everything under control.

Though the true beauty of a brunch-based event is its versatility; it works just as well as a small get together with close friends; or a corporate event; or even as a wedding breakfast with a difference.

Many of our menus are on our website partiestogo. co.uk. If you have a query or want help with an event, then please get in touch with us directly at carole@partiestogo.co.uk

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restaurant promo

Get ready to be surprised at

Saffron Summer Darling joined restaurant owner Ralph Sousa for lunch

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hat you’ll find at Saffron Summer in Chessington could be expected at top central London Indian restaurants, not in Surrey, and at double the prices too. This is no ordinary curry house! Saffron Summer can truly be described as a ‘Haute Indian Cuisine’ fine dining venue.

The Executive Chef is Oberoi trained Awanish Roy, who joined Saffron Summer from The Cinnamon Club in Westminster. I was blown away by the dishes Ralph selected for our lunch. We started with a Gol Guppa (a spicy cold shot) and Sev Batata Puri (Ajwaini spiced chickpeas and potatoes, wheat crisps, yoghurt and tamarind). As the appetisers were fairly light, we managed

another starter from the street food tapas menu, Bhel Puri (puffed rice, carrots, cucumber and onions in a tongue tickling dressing) and still finished our mouthwatering Chingri Malai Prawn Curry, made with pressed coconut and spiced mooli.

Saffron Summer specialises in game, with dishes like wild boar vindaloo, guinea fowl and venison along with traditional foods from different parts of India.

You may find the Indo-Chinese fusion from Chinatown of Calcutta particularly interesting.

More unusual Indian street food and Indian tapas dishes can be discovered at lunch and our special four course Indian Sunday roast lunch at £14.95 is worth trying.

Saffron Summer Indian Restaurant, 4 Ace Parade, Hook Road, Chessington KT9 1DR For reservations please book online saffronsummer.co.uk or call 0208 391 4477

Presently sitting as number one Indian restaurant in Surrey on TripAdvisor and with a 5* rating!

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darlingmagazine.co.uk | spring 2018

27

gourmet promo

Feel like dining in

Bangkok, Mykonos, Milan or Mumbai tonight?

Nesan Thirunesan, Lady Wimbledon and Executive Chef Arup Dasgupta

Let Nesan Thirunesan and his Celebrity Supper Club Chefs take you on an exciting gastronomic journey NC Supper Clubs have arrived in South West London and Surrey and the incredible food from famous chefs is what is pulling diners back time and time again for an experience you won’t find anywhere else.

Started in the summer of 2017 by international entrepreneur Nesan Thirunesan, the exclusive NC Supper Clubs are taking over London with an incredible menu which started with Indian fusion cuisine. 2018 has already seen a Parisian experience with executive chef Arup Dasgupta and an Italian street food evening with modern Thai and Greek cuisine also launched.

The supper clubs will be thrilling gourmets over Chelsea and Knightsbridge with exclusive cuisine experiences. The events so far have been graced with celebrity and high-end clients.

As well as the supper clubs, Nesan runs an exclusive dining and catering experience with private chefs in South West London, Richmond and Surrey.

Spending time between London and Bangalore, Nesan works with the best in celebrity chefs and well-known cookbook writers to create the dishes served at the

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spring 2018 | darlingmagazine.co.uk

events. The chefs are regular demonstrators at food festivals all over the UK including the BBC Good Food Show. Their clear passion to create dishes with a fusion take on the traditional Indian cuisine is why the NC Supper Clubs are taking off and treating guests to incredible food.

From Chef Anjula Devi, author of “Spice for Life”, Chef Dipna Anand author of “Beyond Brilliant”, to Dan Toombs author of “The Curry Guy” and Chef Elisabeth Brown of Coco Labelle, these are just a few of the top names that Nesan works with.

Adding to his already incredible menu of chefs, Nesan is also keen to work with his good friends such as writers and chefs Atul Kochhar (Benares Restaurant), Hari Ghotra, Suresh Pillai (Hoppers London), Sabrina Ghayour, Mallika Basu (Food Columnist, Evening Standard) and Asma Khan (Darjeeling Express).

The events are targeted at food lovers who want to be part of this exclusive NC Supper Clubs experience. A love of food and exploring flavours is all that is needed.

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header

Chef Jai Shaikh

Chef Anjula Devi and Chef Elisabeth Brown

“When people come to my supper club, I want them to be simply blown away by the food. Many of these dishes are not available in mainstream restaurants which adds a unique twist to the food we serve”

Chef Shveta Tuli (Right)

Photo credits: Charlie Burgio Photography Majella O’Connell from Pavlova & Cream

Follow the hashtag #NCSupperClubs on social media to find out about the latest events and what’s cooking in the exclusive world created by Nesan.

To book an NC Supper Club, tailored to your needs ncsupperclubs.com T: 020 3078 9737 nesancreations@gmail.com

I am a fully qualified mentor/ business coach with an MBA in international business, who has run wholesale and retail businesses both big and small for many years in the UK and internationally.

I can help with sourcing/supply chain/selling both locally and overseas and examine all options and pathways for your business.

I can look at the capabilities of the business and the people in it to decide where the future can go and help you put it all into action. shop local

Are you a small business needing a mentor?

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I am very user-friendly and happy to go at any speed!

The first half hour is free so do give me a call to discuss.

Call Josu 07957 541406 or email josu@jabelconsulting.com

darlingmagazine.co.uk | spring 2018

29

The best care in Surrey, in exemplary surroundings A beautiful home-from-home nestled in woodland adjacent to the Silvermere golf course and lake. First class care from a highly trained and professional staff, and with restaurant quality dining. Hair salon, spa, free all day café, and lovely landscaped gardens to enjoy the outdoors and even get gardening!

A sector-leading Well-being Programme to support your mind, body and soul, with a daily schedule of activities and events within the home as well as regular trips out in our own private minibus.

Call 01932 680003

or Search ‘Silvermere Care’ online or on

Silvermere Care Home Redhill Road Cobham Surrey | KT11 1EF

elderly care

Looking for Looking for new home with care Looking for aaa new new home home with with Care? care Looking new home with care MOVINGfor in athe the GOLDEN YEARS MOVING MOVING in in the GOLDEN GOLDEN YEARS YEARS MOVING in the GOLDEN YEARS Moving home in your later years is often overwhelming, Moving home in your later years is often overwhelming, all the so there is family friends to Moving home is or often overwhelming, all the more more soinifif your therelater is no noyears family or friends to support support all the more so if there is no family or friends to support

A A

s you age, the realisation that you are s you age, the realisation that you are losing your independence, mobility and losing your independence, mobility and the to cope can bethat hard toare come s youability age, the realisation you the ability to cope can be hard to come to terms losing with, especially when you have livedand your independence, mobility to terms with, especially when you have lived a full andthe independent life. Accepting you ability to cope can be hardthat to come a full and independent life. Accepting that you might need support can be equally difficult, to terms with, especially when you have livedsince might need support can be equally difficult, since you relied onlife. anyone but yourself a fullhave and never independent Accepting that youand you have never relied on anyone but yourself and it can come as a huge shock when you realisesince might need support can be equally difficult, it can come as a huge shock when you realise that maintaining youron property you have never relied anyonehas butbecome yourself and that maintaining your property has become unmanageable that you when might you require care. it can come as aand huge shock realise unmanageable and that you might require care. that maintaining your property has become Decluttering a person’s is different every unmanageable and thathome you might requireforcare.

Decluttering a person’s home is different for every individual. The one consistent and challenging individual. The one consistent and challenging aspect of thisawork is how a person will react to Decluttering person’s home is different for every aspect of this work is how a person will react to the change The that one inevitably arisesand from a necessary individual. consistent challenging the change that inevitably arises from a necessary cull of of their from moving home aspect thispossessions, work is howbea itperson will react to cull of their possessions, be it from moving home and downsizing or having to partfrom withaan unwieldy the change that inevitably arises necessary and downsizing or having to part with an unwieldy accumulation of objects and Many cull of their possessions, be itpossessions. from moving home accumulation of objects and possessions. Many and downsizing or having to part with an unwieldy accumulation of objects and possessions. Many

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Cheryl Carter

Cheryl Carter Cheryl Carter Founder/Director Founder/Director Every Home Founder/Director Every Home Matters Every Home Matters Cheryl Carter Matters Founder/Director Every Home Matters

older individuals however, find it hard to part with older individuals however, find it hard to part with possessions not only for sentimental reasons but possessions not only for sentimental reasons but also of their personal olderbecause individuals however, findcircumstances it hard to partand with also because of their personal circumstances and experiences.

Some items because of abut ‘make possessions not onlyhoard for sentimental reasons experiences. Some hoard items because of a ‘make do mend’ofmentality drilledcircumstances in during andand after alsoand because their personal do and mend’ mentality drilled in during and after the Second World and mistakenly experiences.

Some War hoard items becausefeel of athey ‘make the Second World War and mistakenly feel they have a potential monetary value.inLetting the do and mend’ mentality drilled during go andofafter have a potential monetary value. Letting go of the home, neighbours, friends the community the Second World War andand mistakenly feel theythey home, neighbours, friends and the community they know love can also be very painful. have aand potential monetary value.

Letting go of the know and love can also be very painful. home, neighbours, friends and the community they Moving can also be stressful at the best of know andhome love can be very painful.

Moving home can be stressful at the best of times, but mixed with poor health, disabilities, times, but mixed with poor health, disabilities, anxiety, age,stressful bereavement, finances Moving dementia, home can be at the best of or anxiety, dementia, age, bereavement, finances or family needs, the with process can be overwhelming. times, but mixed poor health, disabilities, family needs, the process can be overwhelming.

It is paramount to find you canfinances trust or anxiety, dementia, age, people bereavement, It is paramount to find people you can trust to assist, who the can process signpostcan youbetooverwhelming. reputable family needs, to assist, who can signpost you to reputable organisations fortoadditional support throughout It is paramount find people you can trust organisations for additional support throughout the process and facilitate whole move to to assist, who can signpostthe you to reputable the process and facilitate the whole move to organisations for additional support throughout the process and facilitate the whole move to

darlingmagazine.co.uk | spring 2018

31

Ski Injury?

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Our highly experienced team of orthopaedic surgeons, radiologists and physiotherapists can help to provide you with a full and fast recovery.

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header (Josefin 10pt)

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+44 (0) 20 8949 9020 enquiries@newvictoria.co.uk www.newvictoria.co.uk Just off the A3 184 Coombe Lane West Kingston KT2 7EG

DAVID LLOYD CLUB NEWS A HEALTHIER TOMORROW

Getting our kids into good habits

A

healthier tomorrow is normally a statement that has negative connotations. It implies that you have fallen off the diet wagon, given in to your favourite treat or are putting off doing something challenging today and waiting 24 hours to start again. However, for us, there is a far deeper meaning which will have a profound impact on not only tomorrow, but all the tomorrow’s after that.

As a nation we are struggling with rising rates of obesity, increasing sedentary rates and many health issues as a direct result. The question is how can we change and reverse this cycle? The answer is clear.

Educate our children on how to enjoy exercise, eat healthily and create their early social circles within environments within these surroundings.

At Brooklands we offer activities

for children of all ages. From swimming to Karate, family gym sessions, crèche, make & create, mini dance and so much more.

Together we can start creating a healthier tomorrow today.

Call 01932827900 or visit davidlloyd.co.uk/brooklands

relieve relieve thethe stress. stress.

I would I would strongly strongly recommend recommend seeking seeking financial financial advice advice from from a Later a Later LifeLife Adviser Adviser accredited accredited by by thethe Society Society of of Later Later LifeLife Advisers.

Advisers.

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Cohabitation Cohabitation Where Where domiciliary domiciliary or live-in or live-in care care provision provision areare with with a complete a complete stranger stranger as aaslive-in a live-in carer carer cancan be be required, required, it isitessential is essential to find to find thethe right right organisation, organisation, difficult difficult forfor many many especially especially if there if there is no is no humour, humour, as many as many of of these these areare unregulated. unregulated.

By By appointing appointing culture culture or any or any interest interest in common, in common, or even or even a basic a basic an an independent independent care care consultant, consultant, they they willwill carefully carefully knowledge knowledge of of thethe community community andand organisations organisations assess assess thethe needs needs of of thethe individual, individual, carry carry outout an an to support to support interaction. interaction.

It can It can feelfeel likelike an an intrusion intrusion assessment assessment andand carefully carefully research research thethe correct correct care care of of your your home. home.

To To alleviate alleviate thethe discomfort, discomfort, clients clients provider provider or residential or residential home home to suit to suit your your needs. needs. require require companionship, companionship, reassurance reassurance andand empathy empathy from from their their carer; carer; someone someone to accompany to accompany or or encourage encourage andand facilitate facilitate interaction interaction with with thethe outside outside world. world.

It should It should be be noted noted thatthat when when instructing instructing a care a care agency agency make make sure sure thethe carers carers areare police police checked, checked, fully fully trained trained (including (including dementia), dementia), andand paid paid directly directly by by thethe agency. agency.

ForFor more more information, information, seesee ehm-uk.com ehm-uk.com or or call call 020020 8241 8241 9532 9532

Historic costumes from TV’s “A Stitch in Time” on display at Ham House and Garden

me go on display at Ham House and Garden

Charles II, which has taken from a portrait of the monarch that is found at Ham House. am House is the first venue to display the costumes, inspired by historical works of art Sophie Johnson, Senior Visitor Experience Officer and painstakingly recreated by costumier Ninya said ‘WeMikhaila are especially able totailors, displayand the the and excited a teamto ofbe expert outfit ofonly Charles II in nextfans of the place setthe toMarble host allDining six. It Room will give to the image that inspired it’. chance The costumes areexquisite TV show their first to see the craftsmanship the garments uphouse close, and in on display at the 17thofcentury mansion the April. case of one costume, alongside the image that until 29th inspired it.

H

BBC Four’s programme, presented by Amber Butchart, explored the lives of historical figures through the clothes they wore, whilst Ninya’s team recreated the clothing using only traditional techniques.

The costumes created include the ‘Arnolfini dress’, from the Arnolfini Portrait by Jan van Eyck (on display at National Portrait Gallery), the ‘Hedge Cutter’ leather jacket from a portrait at Broughton Castle, the dress of Dido Elizabeth Belle from a painting at Scone Palace, the Jupon of the Black Prince from the effigy at Canterbury Cathedral and Marie Antoinette’s ‘Chemise á la Reine’ from Élisabeth Louise Vigée Le Brun. The collection also includes an outfit of Charles II, taken from a portrait of the monarch at Ham House.

Sophie Johnson, Senior Visitor Experience Officer said ‘We are especially excited to be able to display the outfit of Charles II in the Marble Dining Room next to the image that inspired it’.

Costumier Ninya Mikhaila and

Costumier Ninya Mikhaila and presenter Amber Butchart presenter Amber Butchart during during filming, courtesy filming, courtesy of BBC studios.

of BBC studios.

Charles II (red), outfithis (red), Charles II outfit portrait at his portrait at the background. the background.

Photos provided by Photos provided by National Trust National Trust

The costumes are on display at the 17th century mansion house until 29th April. nationaltrust.org.uk/ham-house-and-garden

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legal promo

DAMAGE LIMITATION Hart Brown Solicitor, Vanessa McMurtrie on dealing with the unforeseen consequences of divorce

D

themselves for the break-up of their parents’ relationship and it can be difficult to convince them otherwise.

It’s important to recognise from the outset that children react to stressful situations in different ways to adults. They do not have the same frame of reference to work from, so to them the feelings of abandonment, confusion, loneliness and even anger are new and often completely overwhelming. Frequently, children blame

Because children can find it difficult to express their emotions, they can shut down and keep their feelings hidden. It’s not unusual for parents to underestimate the impact their marital issues are having on their children. A child may seem ok but in reality is very hurt and unable to communicate how he’s really feeling.

uring a divorce, the priority should be the welfare and wellbeing of any children.

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spring 2018 | darlingmagazine.co.uk

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Authorised and regulated by the Solicitors Regulation Authority (490290) Authorised and regulated by the Financial Conduct Authority

Parents who are thinking of separating need to keep confrontation in front of the children to an absolute minimum, and be aware of how disturbing it is for a child to witness or hear their parents arguing. Also, that children can pick up on an ‘atmosphere’. Children are extremely empathic and can be affected just as much by frosty silences as they can by mum and dad’s arguments.

Have a plan A parenting plan can help make the transition period much smoother, and give you both a point of reference that’s agreed and in place before you start divorce proceedings. At this point, don’t be afraid to ask for help. A third party can often mediate between two partners to ensure the welfare of the children remains a priority from start to finish. Remember that this part of a divorce can become highly emotionally charged, so a mediator can often help to keep a sense of perspective and to calm the situation.

Parental responsibilities While mothers have Parental Responsibility (PR) from birth (unless the child has been put up for adoption) the situation can be less clear for fathers. If married at the time of the child’s birth, then the father has PR. However, if not married then it will depend on the date of birth of the child. If the child was born after 1st December 2003 and the father is named on the birth certificate, then he has PR.

Who should the child live with?

In most cases, the parents make their own arrangements about with whom their child should live, and when the other parent has contact. If agreed amicably, there is no need for a court order.

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However, if the courts become involved in the arrangement, then a number of statutory factors are considered before embodying the arrangements into a ‘Child Arrangements Order’.

How the courts act Throughout the procedure, the child’s welfare is paramount. The older the child, the more likely their wishes and feelings will be a determining factor over whom they live with, and spend time with the other parent.

The courts use a checklist from the Children Act 1989 when deciding issues relating to a child’s welfare. But this does not remove the parent’s responsibility to make sure their child’s welfare is a priority when away from the courtroom and lawyers.

The upheaval that a divorce causes can put enormous strain on a child’s perception of stability and can be unsettling. The relationship with your partner may have come to an end, but you will remain parents to your children for their lifetime which will mean learning how to parent apart but successfully.

At Hart Brown we have a team of experienced family lawyers who provide mediation services and who co-mediate bringing their joint experience and skills into that process to help parents resolve issues so that they and their children can move forward with their lives following the breakdown of their relationship.

If you have a family issue that you would like to discuss with Vanessa you can contact her on 01483 887672 or by email vmm@hartbrown.co.uk For any general enquiry about the legal services Hart Brown offers please call us on 01483 887766 or email us marketing@hartbrown.co.uk

darlingmagazine.co.uk | spring 2018

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home promo

THE FINISHING TOUCH You don’t need to carry out a full redesign to bring a room to life. Interior designer Gabi Da Rocha shows how to pull it off with simple accessories

I

f you’ve recently carried out a refurbishment or are embarking on a makeover to give a room a fresh vibe, you don’t need to blow the budget and splash out on extravagant furnishings and Picasso paintings.

A mix of classic and contemporary patterns and different textures will transform a room and are easy to source: a sumptuous fur throw draped over an armchair, sofa scatter cushions in muted tones, a bold geometric rug, a pair of oversized lamps, an eye-catching centrepiece and a chic collection of hanging monochromatic art. And, if your decorating scheme could do with spicing up, consider a feature wall of statement wallpaper or punchy paint.

Add a personal touch by displaying meaningful pieces which reflect your passions - you might be a book collector, a music lover or an intrepid traveller with special mementos and ornaments

shop local

to show off. Cluster them together in odd numbers for your guests to admire.

Don’t be afraid to work with what you’ve got. It’s often the small details that can be just as dramatic as a full redesign.

Dress up a plain lampshade by adding a beaded fringe, a bobble trim or a band of ribbon.

Don’t overlook curtain tiebacks – there are an abundance of different shapes, sizes, styles and materials out there or, if you’re feeling creative, make your own.

Swap different photos into your picture frames, rearrange your bookshelves and give a vintage piece of furniture a lick of paint.

Perhaps the legs on your rustic wood dining table have had their day - for a contemporary take on an industrial design, why not replace them with stainless steel ones? Complete the look with a vase of seasonal flowers and dot a few scented candles around your living space, arguably the most fashionable necessity of all.

Gabi Da Rocha

GABI’S SHOPPING LIST • Wallpaper & paint: littlegreene.com • Rugs: woven.co.uk • Cushions & throws: Designers Guild • Wall art prints: Affordable Arts Fair • Table legs: etsy.com • Ornaments: TK Maxx • Candles: sandybaylondon.com • Lampshade fringes & tiebacks: vvrouleaux.com For more inspiration, visit gabidarochainteriors.com or call 020 8891 3908 to make an appointment for an initial consultation.

darlingmagazine.co.uk | spring 2018

37

personal journey

WHEN THE

going gets tough Surrey girls get trekking. Alison Shannon reports

C

rampons, ice-slides, freezing temperatures and altitude sickness are a few of the challenges that an intrepid group of Surrey mums overcame when they climbed the 4167m Toubkal peak in Morocco’s Atlas Mountains.

Spurred on by the £10K they had raised for colon cancer charity, 40tude, the ‘Toubkal 8’ found themselves far out of their comfort zone and a long way from their leafy Box Hill training ground.

Collette Rumble, Dee Cantillon, Soraya Thomkins, Susie Martinez

that night we eat a tagine outside and it’s freezing. We are reminded that we are in the desert in the winter.

Day 2

Bus to Imlil, in the foothills of the Atlas Mountains. We set off on an acclimatisation walk and enjoy a tagine lunch while listening to Dr Warren Hyer, a specialist in colon cancer from St Mark’s Hospital explain how the money we raise will be spent. We walk 3 hours to the gite we are staying in that night and our mood is buoyant largely due to Warren’s stirring words.

However, that night it’s really cold. We sit inside, eating a tagine, wearing hats, gloves and coats thinking ‘my goodness, what have we let ourselves in for?’

Day 3

The Toubkal ‘8’

Team leader Alison Shannon’s diary from the trek:Day 1

Lots of excitement as we exit the terminal at Marrakesh.

We are overwhelmed by the colours, smells and romance of this exotic city on the short ride to our riad. In Marrakesh the weather is pleasant but

38

Load our kit on mules and start walking to our next stop, a 3000m high base camp.

Following instructions we start drinking tons of water meaning loo stops behind rocks every 5 minutes. After lunch (another tagine) we crack on, walking up a screed path, and almost immediately hit the snowline where we wave goodbye to the mules and carry the kit ourselves. It’s a slow walk up to the refuge and we get there in the dark, all using our walking poles. Before unpacking, we assemble outside to learn how to walk in crampons and what to do with our ice-axe. This is unsettling as they teach us

how to use it to break a fall. I thought we’d be shown how to use crampons and icepicks as a safety precaution, not that there was a real possibility we might use them ‘in anger’. The mood of the party changes and there is no more larking about.

At this altitude, some of the party feel ill and are quite grim.

Some are sick before even seeing a tagine. The refuge has a rustic dining-room with one fire, the dorms are freezing with no heating and the toilet is grim and only accessible wearing a head torch. The entire party sleep in one dorm but I am next to the puking Helen and in the end seek medical aid - in the dark, using my head torch.

As I drift off to sleep my tummy feels ‘funny’. Great!

Day 4

Wake at 2.45am and lucky to get 45 minutes

spring 2018 | darlingmagazine.co.uk Alison Shannon and Dr Hyer

Alison on top of the world

header

Trekkers ascending Toubkal, Morocco

sleep – if that. Stumble down to breakfast and vomit into my cereal bowl. Three of our group ruled out but I am determined to keep going.

Start trekking in earnest at 4.00am fearful through lack of sleep, cold and the sheer magnitude of the challenge.

The climb is pitch black, sheer drops either side and extremely narrow and steep. One guy turns back after half an hour and two more follow suit. With no spare guides left, we realise that stopping means the whole group turning back. We’d envisaged trekking on packed snow not forging a path though fresh thigh-deep powder – I am

on my knees trying to scramble along and it is really tough going. Then the sun rises which is spectacular but at least when it’s dark you can’t see what lies on either side. Huge gusts of wind stop us in our tracks and we hang on with our ice picks.

Water bottles freeze up. My crampon falls off. I concentrate on putting one foot in front of the other thinking of my family.

Finally we hit the summit and focus on the sponsorship money and enjoy the spectacular views.

It had taken us 5 hours rather than 3 hours and still have a 7 hour walk back to Imlil. We half walk, half slide our way down and finally reach the gite with our head torches back on.

I am too tired to climb the stairs to our room. Dinner, wine and dancing follow and with it a feeling of euphoria. And finally, thankfully, bed.

Day 5

Everyone on a real high. We fly home and are proud of our resilience in adversity. The trek raised over £60,000 for 40tude and my final thoughts to anyone reading my diary is to get yourself screened for colon cancer; and please don’t serve me tagine at a dinner party!

For more information: 40tude.org.uk

Papercourt Sailing Club

L E A R N TO SAIL

I’m a DJ and I’m for hire

in 2018

DJ JACK • • • • •

New members welcome!

Adult beginner courses start Spring Youth sailing starts April - beginners welcome Family friendly RYA Sailability centre

OPEN DAY - Saturday 12th May

07922 219100 jack.candlish14@gmail.com Adults, teens and childrens parties

Papercourt Sailing Club, Polesden Lane, Ripley, Surrey GU23 6JX

CLOSE TO M25 / A3 www.papercourt-sc.org.uk

onthescene

With Darling Socials Editor Holly Candlish COLETTE MACKINTOSH’S ‘ABSOLUTELY FABULOUS’ PARTY AT SILVERMERE GOLF CLUB

Holly & Alistair Candlish with Helen & Tim Perry Anne Pearson, Colette Mackintosh & Tracey di Lorenzo

Cara Carr & Jules Mann

David Dunn, Ruth Marinov, Colette Mackintosh, Jane Dunn and Drago Marinov Torr Czarnowski & Anastasia Scott

Nick & Lindsey Miller

Sean & Pennie Campbell

Tim Beacom, Kate Greenhalgh, Carolyn & Vic Laville

HAWKSMAN REAL ESTATE CELEBRATES 1ST BIRTHDAY IN COBHAM & OXSHOTT

James Davis (Clay Salon), Kevin Norman, Ben Christie (Munch & Wiggles), Luca di Nello (Munch & Wiggles) & Pete Cook (Wynngate)

Alex Bennett, James Mason (Hawksman Real Estate), & Lauren Rand (Precisely Parties)

Kristianna Salmon, Gary Brine (Aspire), Lisa Brine, & James Mason (Hawksman Real Estate)

Robert Walker & Ben Axton (Alexander James Interiors)

WANT TO BE SEEN BINOCS AD

Want to be seen?

Kevin & Jen Norman, Hannah & James Davis

Advertise in Darling 07930 396356 darlingmagazine.co.uk

Nicola Mugford, Marcela Boyle, Abbie Sell and Emma Newman

Lisa Calvert & Michelle Lopez

COBHAM ATHENA MONTHLY WOMEN’S NETWORKING BUSINESS LUNCHEON

Lucy Down, Karen McKeogh, Anna Piechocki & Louise Claremont

Sh

Nikki Alexander, Claire Pelenc a & Michelle Robinson

Rosemary Hemmett, Karine Torr, Cath Robins, Jane Graham & Yiria Globerson

WHAT'S HOT

Darling’s Karine Torr, May Simpkin & Charlotte Broadbent

Anita Eyles & May Simpkin

LOCAL NUTRITIONIST, MAY SIMPKIN TEAMED UP WITH DARLING’S FASHION GURU, CHARLOTTE BROADBENT RECENTLY TO COMBINE A ‘LOOKING GOOD’ WITH A ‘FEELING GOOD’ EVENT

Mint Velvet, CALLIE PRINT LONGLINE COVER UP, £99 Soft touch

Karina Ross, Sarah Frith & Rebecca Scorer

Evie Loves Toast, MAKEUP BAG, £12.99 You know so Fat Face, SARI FLORAL SCARF, £22.50

Nigel Taunt, Brian Dale & Mike Wheeler

David Jarrett, Bob Willis & Alec Stewart

Vintage look

Lorraine and Dan Douthwaite & Chrissy Pierce

OPENING OF THE NEW JARRETT CRICKET CENTRE AT REEDS SCHOOL BY ALEC STEWART OBE

Jigsaw, AMOUR LACE UP TRAINERS, £98 School run Crew, SKINNY JEANS, £65

ladywimbledon.com @ladywimbledon

Sarah & David Kenningham

Alec Stewart, Alison Atkins, Kathryn Bartram, Lucy Sadler, Sharmaien Matthews & Ed Whiffin

#LadyWimbledon

Adrian Fairbank & Janet Nelson

Alison Ramsey, Nicci Fairbank & Holly Candlish

AN EVENING WITH ARTIST JANET NELSON AT THE ART AGENCY IN ESHER

Caroline King, Caroline Buckland & Kirstin McEvoy

Alison Ramsay, David Watkin, Suzi & Roger Clarke

Gallery owners Alison Ramsay and Emma Riley with Janet in the middle

Sarah & John Fulton with Emma & Felix Riley BLOODWISE SPORTS AWARDS (left) James Davis, Rebecca Charlton & Simon Giamatti. James raised over £8500 for the charity, riding from London to Paris. His team The Pscyclepaths raised £56,000!

point of view

THE SEX TAPE

By Kate Greenhalgh

S

pring, and an emptynester’s fancy, lightly turns to thoughts of downsizing. But at the same time, flash-backs to previous house-moves. Frantic rummaging, after finding only a cucumber and a puncture repair kit in the vital box marked ‘corkscrew’; losing all trace of your kids’ exam certificates, so they will never go to university or get a job; spending a fortune at the Cat Psychologist to get Tiddles through the trauma.

Years ago, our local removals company, Bushells, moved us from Clarence Road to Woodhayes Road. They were really good. Keep it local, people! However, just before we moved, my husband had brought home a ‘video’ (remember those) lent to him by our Best Man. NB: like my husband, our Best Man was also a sad, trainee accountant, which contextualises the following, (not being nasty about trainee accountants - no trainee accountant ever describes their life as anything but terribly sad, but then they qualify and buy a BMW and join a golf club and are very happy.)

The video was entitled ‘The Lover’s Guide’.

(You must remember it - it was luridly advertised on bus-sides in the ‘90’s.)

We watched a bit of it, feeling quite racy but also sheepish, before being so embarrassed we hid it down the back of a book-case. It was a sort of quasi-scientific documentary about how shop local

to be fabulously sensual but employing actors whose general physique and demeanour implied expertise in the more fictional field of erotic cinematography. If you know what I mean.

After the move and during unpacking, I had one of those shock-horror moments: the forgotten video cassette. Gone!

SO mortifying. For about 20 years after, every time I saw a Bushells removal van, I wished the ground would swallow me up. They must have found the tape, and tactfully disposed of it, whilst sniggering.

We were probably the legend of Bushells.

A few months ago, clearing out the attic, I opened a VHS box for Disney’s ‘The Little Mermaid’ and there, inside, misfiled, was the unspeakable ‘Lover’s Guide’. All in a rush, I realised that Bushells Removals had not spent the last two decades laughing up their sleeves; they had not discovered the saucy cassette and mockingly confiscated it, knowing we could hardly complain without heaping shame upon our heads, and thankfully the children had been watching another tape of ‘The Little Mermaid’ which really was ‘The Little Mermaid.’

This means I can now go back to Bushells for my next house move free of all embarrassment!

Assuming they do not read this. darlingmagazine.co.uk | spring 2018

45

What’s On this spring Spring Food Fair, Garsons, Esher

London Bus Museum Spring Gathering at Brooklands

International Women’s Day at Watts Gallery

Borneo Harvest Festival 2018

Sat 24th 9am - 5pm, and Sun 25th March 11am - 5pm garsons.co.uk Suffragist Artists in Partnership - Exhibition and talks Thurs 8th March 11am - 5pm wattsgallery.org.uk

Nourish and Flourish at the Medicine Garden yoga and mindfulness in a beautiful setting Sat 17th March, 10am - 1pm themedicinegarden.com/nourish-flourish

EASTER HOLIDAY ACTIVITIES

Meet the Shepherd (and the lambs!) session at Bocketts Farm Thurs 29th March - Sun 15th April Easter Quiz Trail with chocolate treats! bockettsfarm.co.uk

Easter Animal Trail – British Wildlife Centre

Fri 30th March - Sun 15th April, 10am to 5pm britishwildlifecentre.co.uk

National Trust Easter Egg Hunt

Fri 30th Mar - Mon 2nd April, 10:30 to 4pm Claremont Landscape Garden KT10 9JG nationaltrust.org.uk/claremont-landscape-garden

Creature Comforts at Polesden Lacey (with Easter Egg Hunt)

Trail - find the perfect bed for a surprise Asian Creature Fri 30th March - Sun 15th April, 10am to 3pm nationaltrust.org.uk/polesden-lacey

Wild Learning, Polesden Lacey Wild art, obstacle courses, wildlife & fun things.

Daily, 5th - 10th April wild-learning.net

Wild Easter Camp, Painshill Park

Tues 10th - Thurs 12th April, 9am to 4:30pm painshill.co.uk

Sun 15th April, all day londonbusmuseum.com

Cobham Village Hall Sat 5th May, 12am - 4pm, Bazaar & Games, 6:30 - 11pm Dinner event £35 sabahan-abroad.org

Oxshott Village Day

Mon 7th May oxshottvillageday.com

May Flyer – CycloSportif

South Western Road Club, start in Oxshott Sun 20th May from 8am swrc.org.uk/mayflyer-sportive

Happy Days Festival

Imber Court, Esher Sat 26th - Sun 27th May hdfestival.co.uk

Esher May Fair

Esher Green Sun 20th May, 12am - 6pm eshermayfair.org.uk

THEATRES

The Leatherhead Theatre Captain Flinn and the Pirate Dinosaur 2: The Magic Cutlass Tues 10th April, 3pm

Leatherhead Drama Festival 7th -19th May theleatherheadtheatre.com

Epsom Playhouse Epsom Symphony Orchestra – The Planets Sat 3rd March, 7:30pm

Mike Piggott / Nils Solberg Quintet play Grappelli and others Mon 12th March, 8pm

Epsom Players present - The Full Monty Wed 25th - Sat 28th April, 7:30pm epsomplayhouse.co.uk

The Theatre In The Woods, West Horsley Place Oklahoma!

7th June - 7th July grangeparkopera.co.uk

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