G4
FILM
InOut | THE CPH POST ENTERTAINMENT GUIDE
15 - 21 February 2013
A good day to let the whole franchise die out DAVE SMITH
A Good Day to Die Hard (15)
Dir: John Moore; US action/crime, 2013, 97 mins; Bruce Willis, Jai Courtney, Mary Elizabeth Winstead, Sebastian Koch, Cole Hauser Premiered February 14 Playing nationwide
B
RUCE WILLIS, presumably due to a clause in his contract with the Devil in which he gave up his hair, is returning as New York cop John McClane for a fifth time to battle evil terrorists. In this, the latest chapter of the seemingly never-ending series, McClane heads to Moscow to rescue his sonJack (Jai Courtney), who is charged with murder and set to appear in court. McClane is unaware, however, that his son is working as a CIA operative, and in fact committed the crime in order to gain access to political prisoner and potential snitch Yuri Komarov (Sebastian Koch). McClane’s arrival conveniently coincides with both Jack’s hearing and an attempt on Komarov’s life, and Jack’s subsequent attempts to smuggle him out of Russia. Only minutes into the McClane family reunion, McClane Sr, Jack and Komarov all find themselves fleeing a heavily-armed gang pursuing Komarov, who are hoping to retrieve a dossier that could incriminate their boss. But against all the odds ... With the first Die Hard now firmly anchored into the minds of film fanatics as the pinnacle of action cinema, opinions vary as to which of the sequels – if any – actually hold a candle to the original. It is worth noting that John McTiernan, director of the first two films, abandoned the franchise in 1995 after Die Hard with a Vengeance – and for good reason, it seems. Each of the subsequent follow-ups to the 1998 original have
Willis will have to take up drinking again in order to get over this flop of a film
paled in comparison to the first. Die Hard with a Vengeance boasted a few merits, but this instalment has lost feeling of it being a Die Hard film. Len Wiseman unwisely fell victim to the same phenomenon with Live Free or Die Hard, taking the action across the entire Eastern seaboard in a war against a cyber terrorist hell-bent on holding the country at ransom. Aspects of each sequel work on some levels, but no longer share anything in common with the first film. A Good Day to Die Hard only exacerbates this issue further. Willis’s McClane has devolved
almost beyond recognition. By now, he’s had to accept the fact that the world has changed, and the methods he employed in the late ‘80s will no longer suffice to save the day. He’s developed from a lovable black sheep into a deranged sociopath, for whom it’s a tall order to function normally in the everyday world. When he finally does find Jack in Moscow, his son unsurprisingly wants nothing to do with him. Much of the film’s shortcomings can be undoubtedly attributed to scriptwriter Skip Woods (X-Men Origins: Wolverine, The A-Team), but in
truth, Willis himself isn’t blameless, either. After two decades as the face of the franchise, Willis should at least have set the standards higher, as the rest of the cast can do little to help. Courtney’s Jack is far too lacking in complexity to hold any clout as a hero, and Koch, known for his roles in The Lives of Others and Black Book, can only hint at his underlying talent with a flimsy character and wafer-thin script. Coarse and monotonous where its predecessors were clever and complex – where are the charming British villains pretending to be Germans? – it’s
no exaggeration to call A Good Day to Die Hard the worst film of the lot. It struggles to entertain or evoke a reaction even on a basic level. Perhaps most worrisome of all is the knowledge that the suffering is far from over and that the franchise will continue. As the title of this instalment suggests, perhaps Willis has actually deemed it a good day to die – and is actually willing himself to do so in letting the franchise live on. If that’s the case, he’s on exactly the right track with this film. Because as hard as it may be, Bruce, it’s time to die. Please try harder.
This witch-hunt is a grim fairy tale, alright Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters (15) Dir: Tommy Wirkola; US action/ adventure, 2013, 88 mins; Jeremy Renner, Gemma Arterton, Famke Janssen, Zoe Bell, Peter Stormare Premiered February 7 Playing nationwide
T With two Oscar nominations to his name, Renner must be wondering how he ended up as Hansel on the hunt
HE IDEA is [that Hansel & Gretel have] grown up and they hunt witches,” a producer explained. “It’s a hybrid sort of old-timey feeling, yet there’s pump-action shotguns. Modern technology, but in an old style. We heard it and we were just like: ‘That’s a freakin’ franchise! You could make three of those!’”
To which this reviewer can only say: what a depressing thought. The premise may be potentially legitimate. The storyline adds depth to the Brothers Grimm’s concise original. And reaching deep for praise, I even found something to like about the film’s solitary troll who provides a nice variation to the endless swarms of Halloween-y witches who beset the plot. Having said all that, I really don’t know how to interest a viewer in this clunky, selfsatisfied slice of CGI and 3Denhanced horror comedy. To be fair, I was never the film’s target audience. But that’s because I happen to like my mashed-up entertainment done with just
a touch of intelligence – that’s reasonable. Simply imagining Hansel and Gretel (Renner and Arterton, respectively) 15 years later as self-ordained vigilantes out for witch blood is not enough, although I did find it an inspired touch that Hansel has contracted diabetes from eating too much candy back at the witch’s place. It’s at least refreshing to see a stereotypical hero embarrassed by his insulin injections. Norwegian writer-director Tommy Wirkola gained some notoriety with the cult Nazi zombie pic Dead Snow in 2008. This, his first Hollywood outing, is most of all a star vehicle for the sombre Renner (The Bourne Legacy and Avengers) and the
fetching Arterton. Sleepwalking through the motions as tough, sexy icons of medieval bounty hunting, they have their work cut out for them when they’re commissioned to rescue several children kidnapped by witches, who unfortunately are less scary due to their familiar cartoonish quality. Weapon aficionados will appreciate the gory climax, which is about as plausible a story as the nude scenes in which Hansel goes skinny-dipping with a star-struck, well-endowed ‘white witch’. In terms of romance, sister Gretel is less fortunate. She only manages to seduce a geeky teenager and an emasculated troll. KASPER R GULDBERG