costalinkmagazinemarch2017

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March 2017 N°120

No1

MARBELLA

AUTOMOTIVE•ELECTRONIC•DIAGNOSTIC

Computer Problems? we can help....

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Glass Curtains costadelhome.com intelligent property search

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IRONWORKS High quality metal at factory prices Established since 1989

Protect Your Home Windows Door Rejas

Protect Your Family Patio Rejas Drive Gates Etc.

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VISIT OUR WEBSITE FOR PRICES & MORE EXTENSIVE CATALOGUE

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TELEPHONE

678 691 393

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Happy Birthday to us!!! Costa Link Magazine is hitting double figures this month 10 years old and still going strong!

To say that the weather here on the Costa del Sol has been funny this year is an understatement… Snow, floods of rain and it’s been REALLY cold.

The clocks go forward on Sunday the 26th, SPRING IS COMING - let’s see some sun PLEASE! Diary dates to remember this month are: St David’s Day on the 1st. Our jaunty Leprechaun on the front cover celebrates St. Patrick’s day on the 17th of March a perfect excuse to get out and enjoy a Guinness or three! Spanish Fathers Day on the 19th of March and last but very much not least its Mothers Day (UK) is on the 26th of March.

So all in all March is going to be quite a busy month. We are still offering incredible deals on our advertising rates please call us for more information.

I’m off to get a well-deserved cuppa. Keep smiling and enjoy the read!

Ed’s Note..

in the February Magazine...

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Women’s World this month: Funny marriage advice for wives...

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???

Solutions on page 80 Pit your brains against the TRIVIA QUIZ, questions for all ages from 6 -116!

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Gadgets & Gizmo’s: Geek out on Lamborghini’s beat box, B&O’s fantastic new headphones and a $1,000,000 watch…

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A Man’s World: Lads get rowdy in a bar and one man has a very BIG problem...!

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All Revved Up: This month we are looking at the new lux 4x4’s hitting the market see page 54.

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The kid’s page this month...We are celebrating St Paddy’s Day with Mickey Mouse!

What’s On Guide... The Marbella Carnival continues, Joseph and the Amazing Technicolour Dreamcoat at the Salon Varieties in Fuengirola plus lots more…

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Business Directory... Can’t find that all important contact see page 76.

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Solutions on page 80 Puzzle It Out... Puzzles galore challenge those little grey cells.

HOW TO CONTACT US Call: 951 254 222 or 663 061 669 Email: sales@costalinkmagazine.com

Website: www.costalinkmagazine.com Facebook: facebook.com/costa.link.spain 4

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The Jokes Page: Laugh out loud or get some giggles on page 72!!!

Whatsapp: 663 061 669 or Tweet: @costa_link

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No part of this publication, including layout, graphic design or pictures may be copied, SCANNED, used or reproduced without our prior written consent. Costa Link Magazine accepts no responsibility for alterations to events listed, claims made by our advertisers or information provided by our contributors. All rights reserved © 2016. Deposito Legal: MA-228-2007

to advertise in costa link magazine please call 951 254 222 or 663 061 669

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• All advertisers have FREE INCLUSION in the business directory

• All advertisers have THEIR OWN PAGE on the Costa Link Magazine website with map & link to their Facebook page, website & lots more...

• All advertisers have FREE INCLUSION in the on-line business directory • NUMBER ONE ‘Costa del Sol magazine’ on Google for over 7 years

email: sales@costalinkmagazine.com web: www.costalinkmagazine.com

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Nยบ1 Magazine Costa del Sol on Nยบ1 Business Directory Costa del Sol on More likes than any other Costa del Sol Magazine on What is the point of advertising anywhere else?

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tel: 951 254 222 or 663 061 669

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A Woman’s World

Marriage Advice for Wives..

Correct His Driving

How will your husband know he's going too fast unless you continuously slam the imaginary brakes on the passenger side of the car?

If You Want Something, Feed Him

When men are hungry, they get cranky and irritable. A hungry husband is less likely to agree to any requests or demands. If you need to discuss something serious, or if you want him to do something for you, check his appetite first.

Help Him Improve Himself

If your husband likes fishing for insance and brings home a fish, say, "I thought it would be bigger." It will encourage him to try harder next time.

Play the Damsel in Distress

To get what you want. When you need an

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unpleasant job done around the house don't ask your husband to do it. Instead, attempt the job yourself, do it badly and let him show you the "right" way to do it. He gets to be the hero, and you get to go relax.

Smile & Nod

When your husband needs to bare his soul, let him. Even if you have absolutely no interest in what he's saying, at least pretend to listen.

After all, women often try to convince men to be more communicative. So let him complain.

Allow your eyes to glaze over and daydream about something else. It's a safe bet he'll never notice.

Don't Argue about Small Things

If you insist on putting your foot down about everything, you're bound to get exhausted.

Instead, let the small stuff slide and save the big fights for important stuff, such as finances, children and picking what’s on the TV that night...

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Boutique Nicole Avda. del Mediterrรกneo, Edif. San Pedro del Mar, Local 4, San Pedro Alcรกntara

(near Da Bruno Restaurant, Opposite the Fishing Boat)

HOT ROYAL GOSSIP...

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p i s s z i o b G how S

PRINCE HARRY NEEDS THE QUEEN’S PERMISSION TO GET MARRIED... If you’ve recently been watching The Crown on Netflix’s then

you will know all about The Royal Marriages Act. That stopped Princess Margaret marrying Peter Townsend (due to him being divorced) if not then here is the rub…The Royal Marriages Act dates back to 1772, passed by King George III after he supposedly disapproved of his brothers’ marriages. The law states that the reigning monarch must grant permission to their direct descendants before they cant get married, and if the sovereign chooses to say no, the marriage in question will not go ahead. The Queen has to sign a notice of approval, granting her formal consent to the marriage, and confirming her trust in their choice of spouse. Although the act has changed over time, now only limited to the first six in line to the throne, Prince Harry (fifth in line) is still one of the people that it applies to, and must wait for his grandmother’s permission if the situation arises. The Queen has never formally denied a marriage request though so we doubt they’re worried, but Meghan might still have to wait a while for an introduction with the sovereign, with Kate Middleton only being introduced after four years of dating Prince William. Still, we’ve got our fingers crossed. Although if you read on…

HARRY AND MEGHAN'S $59 MILLION PRENUP... According to Woman’s Day in Australia, Prince Harry & Meghan Markle have set a wedding date and it going to be this September, also they are currently in the process of getting a prenup written up... The pair are reportedly worth a whopping $59 million between them and lawyers for the pair are said to be finalising the document within the next few weeks. Apparently Meghan is the one to initiate the legally binding contract, as she wants to be financially independent if it doesn’t work out.

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HOT GOSSIP...

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p i s s z i o b G how S

TOWIE IS BACK THIS MONTH, WHAT’S NEW IN SERIES 20?

Our tantastic Essex lads and ladies are back! And they're heading to Tenerife.

The special anniversary of the show is sure to bring chaos and mayhem the only way the Essex crew know how. The new series of Towie has started filming. However, at the time of us going to press ITVBe are yet to announce an official airdate. The Only Way Is Tenerife special aired last month. Pete & Megan are still together – and if not, why not? On the other hand, Megan’s best mate Amber Turner is joining the team she brings some explosive drama with her. Gemma Collins will be back full time with her V funny sidekick Bobby Norris… Roll on the fake tan, get ready for lots of tears and loads of EXPLOSIVE arguments! Whoop, whoop we can’t wait!

BRAND BECKHAM: IS IT ALL OVER? They’ve been battling to save

their public image…When some of David’s emails were hacked and leaked to the world last month, we’ve seen a different side to the former football star. Should he have heard the words ‘Arise, Sir David,’ then yes probably he should have, all the work he has done with charities he supports, but unfortunately David you don’t always get what you want in this world… Suddenly Brand Beckham itself is marching towards the guillotine. Teams of lawyers and PR specialists scrabble to rescue a £500 million business empire. For years flawless Brand Beckham has been carefully constructed. Now the public has seen behind the mask, nobody can say what the future holds.

UNLUCKY IN LOVE? Could Kylie Minogue play matchmaker in the next series of Blind Date? Newly single singer could be playing matchmaker in rebooted version of hit show on Channel 5... TV bosses have already devised a plan to turn her into the next Cilla Black. Watch this space!

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it’s snow joke...

Dead Penguins - I never knew this...

Did you ever wonder why there are no dead penguins on the ice in Antarctica?

Where do they go? Wonder no more!!!

It is a known fact that the penguin is a very ritualistic bird which lives an extremely ordered and complex life. The penguin is very committed to its family and will mate for life, as well as maintain a form of compassionate contact with its offspring throughout its life.

If a penguin is found dead on the ice surface, other members of the family and social circle have been known to dig holes in the ice, using their vestigial wings and beaks, until the hole is deep enough for the dead bird to be rolled into, and buried.

The male penguins then gather in a circle around the fresh grave and sing: "Freeze a jolly good fellow."

"Freeze a jolly good fellow."

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March 26th Mothers Day & Easter Sunday 16th April 16

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s ’ k c i St Pyatr Da

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of the best and most unique places to celebrate

When you think of St. Patrick’s Day, a few things that are likely come to mind: the color green, Guinness, & tiny leprechauns.

Although St. Patrick’s Day is an Irish tradition, it’s safe to say that it is not reserved exclusively for the Irish, and it certainly isn’t found only in Ireland. You can celebrate it all over the world, read on to find out 8 of the best and most unique places to celebrate St. Patrick’s day.

O’Neill, Nebraska

Nebraska probably isn’t the first place that comes to mind when considering your options for St. Patrick’s Day. However, I bet you didn’t know that it is home to the world’s largest shamrock. Each year on St. Patrick’s Day, a parade takes over at the intersection near the giant shamrock, which is freshly painted annually in preparation for the event. The shamrock is made of colored concrete and was installed on the main intersection in the year 2000.

Ise, Japan

Japan is another unexpected destination to celebrate this Irish tradition. Hundreads of people gather at the Ise Shrine to participate in the day’s activities. A non-profit organization called Irish Network Japan is in charge of facilitating all events in what is considered to be Asia’s largest St. Patrick’s day parade.

Japanese residents flood the streets, performing jigs and playing bagpipes while dressed like leprechauns.

Dublin, Ohio

There is in fact a city named Dublin in Ohio. So it only seems dutiful for this city to participate in the holiday. A mile-long procession of up to 100 floats fills the streets each year along with leprechauns and bagpipers. A giant shamrock-shaped float leads the parade. The parade lasts about an hour and a half and travels a mile through the city.

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San Francisco, California

Believe it or not, San Francisco holds one of the biggest St. Patrick’s Day events. The parade commences in the morning, where it heads down Market Street to the City Center Plaza.

After the parade’s over, the festivities continue with performances by Irish dancers as well as arts and crafts, and of course lots of beer and celebrating!

Florence, Italy

While Florence may only have one Irish-owned pub, that doesn’t stop them from throwing a St. Patrick’s Day bash. The Irlanda in Festa takes place each year over the span of three days. There are various parties and concerts, as well as Irish food and drink. All activities take place at the Obihall, which is a huge tent where there is pub fare, beer, and Celtic musicians and dancers.

Chicago, Illinois

The Saturday before St. Patrick’s Day, spectators from all over the country gather to watch the annual Chicago River dyeing.

After the river turns a bright green, a parade commences that includes colorful floats, Irish step dancers, and marching bands of bagpipers. Typically, over 400,000 people attend.

After the parade, there is a ceremony in which “The Parade Queen” is named as well as a cabbage and corned beef dinner for everyone to enjoy.

Sydney, Australia

At one point, the Irish Australian population outweighed the Australian population in Sydney, so it’s no surprise that Sydney takes St. Patrick’s Day celebrations seriously it is ranked the fourth largest in the world. The Sydney Opera house also participates and shines bright green upon nightfall.

Pop into any local bar or pub and chances are they will be serving green beer.

Dublin, Ireland

Now for the BIG one! Saving the biggest celebration for last.

Celebrating St. Patrick’s Day in Dublin? What to choose? The city’s St. Patrick’s Day festival lasts for five full days, offering a huge street carnival, a treasure hunt, and a 5k run sponsored

by Guinness. There is also the tradition of what is referred to as “greening the city,” in which many of the historic buildings are illuminated with green lights to add to the atmosphere of holiday cheer.

Have a great day wherever you choose to celebrate it!

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www.what.com

All of these are companies didn't spend quite enough time considering how their online names might appear to others - and be misread...

1. Who Represents is where you can find the name of the agent that represents any celebrity. Their Web site is www.whorepresents.com

2. Experts Exchange is a knowledge base where programmers can exchange Advice and views at www.expertsexchange.com 3. Looking for a pen? Look no further than Pen Island at www.penisland.net 4. Need a therapist? Try Therapist Finder at www.therapistfinder.com 5. There's the Italian Power Generator company, www.powergenitalia.com 6. And don't forget the Mole Station Native Nursery in New South Wales, www.molestationnursery.com www.penisland.net

7. If you're looking for IP computer software, try..... www.ipanywhere.com 8. The First Cumming Methodist Church Web site is..... www.cummingfirst.com 9. And the designers at Speed of Art await you at..... www.speedofart.com 10. Fancy a day out fishing in Florida, need bait? Contact..... www.masterbaitonline.com

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info@acpproperty.com www.acpproperty.com

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TRIVIA QUIZ

1) Which male animal is called a Tom or a Jake?

2) Who painted the Mona Lisa?

3) What is the correct way to address a Duke?

4) Which famous actress was the part of Dorothy in The Wizard of Oz originally intended for?

5) What is the sixth planet from the Sun in the Solar System?

6) In which war was the Victoria Cross first awarded?

7) What is the only gemstone to be composed of one single element?

8) In music, who was sometimes called the thin white duke?

9) What is the difference between an exocannibal and an indocannibal?

10) What is the largest

peninsula in the world?

11) How many squares on a Rubik's Cubic never alter their position?

12) Who was assassinated on April 4th 1968?

13) Which airport has the code LGW? 14) What did William Herschel discover in 1781?

15) "Rwy'n dy garu di" means "I love you" in which language?

16) The Three Gorges Dam, as of 2016, the largest hydroelectric power station in the world stands on which river?

17) Alfred Nobel, the benefactor behind the Nobel Prize awards, was born in which country?

18) Who invented the thermometer in 1593?

19) What is the difference

between polygamy and polyandry?

20) Who were the following cartoon characters named after: a: Buzz Lightyear b: Nemo from - Finding Nemo c: Yogi Bear 21) Which comedy was set on the remote backwater of Craggy Island?

22) How many distinct bones are in a human hand?

23) Off which Australian coast is the Great Barrier Reef located?

24) Who is the All-Father of all the Nordic Gods?

25) John F. Kennedy International Airport services which city?

26) What is the occupation of Otto Man in the animated series The Simpsons?

Answers on page 80

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Working On The Costa Del Sol Since 1990

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King Arthur’s Quest

King Arthur was getting ready to go on a Quest. He was worried about leaving his beautiful Queen Guinevere alone with all those lonely knights of the Round Table. So he went to his famous wizard, Merlin, for some advice. After explaining his predicament to Merlin, the wizard looked thoughtful and said to come back in a week and he'd see if he could come up with something. A week later King Arthur was back in Merlin's laboratory where the good wizard was showing him his latest invention. It was a chastity belt... except it had a rather large hole in the most obvious place. "This is no good, Merlin!" the king exclaimed, "Look at this opening. How is this supposed to protect m'lady, the Queen?" "Ah, sire, just observe." said Merlin as he searched his cluttered workbench until he found what he was looking for. He then selected his most worn out wand, one that he was going to discard anyway. He then inserted it in the gaping aperture of the chastity belt whereupon a small guillotine blade came down and cut it neatly in two.

"Merlin, you are a genius!" said the grateful monarch, "Now I can leave knowing that my queen is fully protected." After putting Guinevere in the device, King Arthur then set out upon his Quest. Several years passed until he returned to Camelot.

Immediately he assembled all his knights in the courtyard and had them drop their trousers for an informal 'gentleman sausage' inspection. Sure enough! Each and every one of them was either amputated or damaged in some way. All of them except Sir Galahad. "Sir Galahad," exclaimed King Arthur, "The one and only true knight! Only you among all the nobles have been true to me. What is it in my power to grant you?

Name it and it is yours!" But Sir Galahad was speechless....

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Our range of services includes; Cleaning and laundering Visitor meeting Regular planned inspections & reports Kitchen & bathroom refurbishments General maintenance & repairs Legal & financial advice Paying taxes, dealing with utility companies etc

To find out if we can help you please call or e-mail...

For a no obligation chat

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liar, liar pants on fire!

Ever heard any of these excuses (“cough, cough lies”) before?

• The check is in the mail.

• I'll respect you in the morning.

• I'm from your Tax Office... and I am here to help you.

• It's only a cold sore.

• You get this one, I'll pay next time.

• My wife doesn't understand me.

• Trust me, I'll take care of everything.

• She means nothing to me.

• Don't worry, he's never bitten anyone.

• I'll call you later.

• We'll release the new upgrade by the end of the year.

• Read my lips: no new taxes.

• I've never done anything like this before.

• Now, I'm going to tell you the truth.

• It's supposed to make that noise.

• Of course I love you.

• I am getting a divorce.

• Don't worry, I can go another 20 miles when the gauge is on "empty."

• Drinking? Why, no, Officer.

• It's not the money... it's the principle of the thing.

• ...but we can still be good friends.

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• ...then take a left.

You can't miss it.

• Don't worry... it's OK - I'm sterile.

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We are proud to announce the recent opening of our new outlet in El Zoco, Calahonda on the N340!

But don’t panic, this does not mean you have to wait weeks for delivery! We still have the most extensive stock of British beds and sofas on the coast, but you can now come and try them out in our much more comfortable surroundings. The best part is that everything is still direct from the warehouse; so at a fraction of the cost! We are also now supplying British SOLID OAK household furniture in a range of styles as well as quality. British bedding and mattress toppers in all sizes.

We supply the retail shops so visit ‘THE BED WAREHOUSE’ directly to save money now!

Top Quality British Beds & Mattresses at Unbeatable Prices Top name brands such as SEALY, SILENTNIGHT & RELYON REST ASSURED etc...

• All Sizes - Specialising in SUPER KING • Woodframe • Metalframe

• Drawer Divans • Ottoman storage beds (*all sizes) • Guest beds

• Children’s Beds • Orthopaedic • Pocket sprung, memory foam, pillow top etc

TOP NAME SOFAS - DFS, HARVEYS & SOFAWORKS www.bedwarehousespain.com Open Mon-Fri, 10 til 5 & Saturday 10 til 2 bedwarehousespain@hotmail.com For Immediate Courteous Attention

634 187 700 600 633 986 (Emma)

NEW OUTLET!

Find us on the 1st floor of Centro Comercial El Zoco, Calahonda

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GADGETS &Gizmo’s Declare war on peel, pith and pip... Just look at this Smeg juicer it is pretty low-tech, but if what you want simple, fresh orange juice, this beautiful juicer is for you and it’s easy to clean! Curved and bursting with personality, Smeg's Citrus Juicer is a celebration of Smeg’s Italian heritage.

The Beoplay H4 wireless headphones from B&O Offer a real touch of luxury with lambskin cushions, memory foam innards and aluminium ear cup discs the cord connecting the two discs is braided because, well, it looks good. With up to 19 hours of wireless listening for the H4s, which charge over a standard Micro USB port. And should the battery die, the H4s can be used as wired headphones through a 3.5mm jack.

Many serious pc gamers or IT professionals use three monitors keeping various windows open at all times, but nobody has attempted a machine like Razer’s Project Valerie until now. The revolutionary laptop’s three 17.3-inch 4K screens provide groundbreaking visual convenience alone, two screens emerge from the central chassis and into place themselves under their own power, no adjustment needed. Project Valerie is no mere novelty, either, at just 12 pounds, and 1.5 inches thick.

Prices have not yet been released.

The Lamborghini Esavox Bluetooth speaker has been meticulously designed and created around the style and proportions of Lamborghini cars. It has a 15 inch sub-woofer and two 1-inch tweeters, powered with a 600 Watt amplifier, and a 200 Watt dedicated amplifier solely for the sub-woofer.

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All the latest in the world of tech and gaming...

The Les Cabinotiers Celestia Astronomical Grand Complication 3600.

Is the most intense watch Vacheron Constantin has ever created and it has been many years in the making. It’ll tell you the time the sun rises and the time the sun sets, the seasons of the year and the sign of the zodiac currently represented. The little Sun, Moon and Earth array up at 11 o’clock conspire to tell you the tides, while on the back there’s a moving star chart, room to see the tourbillon movement and a gauge revealing the charge level of its (remarkable) 21-day power reserve. If you want one – be ready to part with $1M.

Last year, Hasbro revealed Simon Optix an updated version of its Classic game. You wave your hands in front of your face as the visor illuminates the area/color you need to pick. Built-in motion sensors track where your hands are and if you get to the specified located fast enough. Similar to the classic version, the movements become more complex as the game progresses. If you have multiple Optix headsets, they can be paired together for a head-to-head or multiplayer setup.

The Actifry Smart XL fryer cooks easy low-fat food and is the first Actifry to come with ‘smart’ features. Using the app to control the fryer from your smartphone, it adjusts the cooking settings based on the recipe you choose from the hundreds available with step-by-step instructions, so you can explore options beyond just chips. These extras will cost you though – the XL is the priciest Actifry to date, at around 350€.

Canon redefines the entry level again with the user-friendly but top-spec 800D designed from the body up for beginners.

With its novice-friendly built-in photography guide and super-fast autofocus it should be a cinch to just pick up and start shooting with - but it's also packed with the latest tech to make sure the photos you take are up there with the best.

Including a 24.2 megapixel sensor and Canon’s latest and fastest processor.

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Death at the Manor...

At dawn the telephone rings....

“Hello, Sir James? This is Rodney, the caretaker at your country house.”

“Ah yes, Rodney. What can I do for you? Is there a problem?”

“Um, I am just calling to advise you, Sir James that your parrot died.”

“My parrot? Dead? The one that won the International competition?”

“Yes, Sir, that's the one.” “Damn! That's a pity, I spent a small fortune on that bird.” “What did he die from?” “From eating rotten meat, Sir James” “Rotten meat? Who the hell fed him rotten meat?” “Nobody, Sir. He ate the meat of the dead horse.”

“Dead horse? What dead horse?”

"Rodney “The thoroughbred, Sir James.” “My prize thoroughbred is blitherin , you g idiot..." dead?” “Yes Sir James, he died from all that work pulling the water cart.” “Are you insane? What water cart?” “The one we used to put out the fire, Sir” “Good Lord! What fire are you talking about, man?” “The one at your house, Sir! A candle fell and the curtains caught on fire.” “What the hell?...Are you saying that my mansion is destroyed because of a candle?!!! “Yes Sir James.”

“But there's electricity at the house!!! What was the candle for?”

“For the funeral, Sir James.” “WHAT BL*@DY FUNERAL?” “Your wife's, Sir... She showed up one night out of the blue and I thought she was a thief, so I hit her with your new Rory Mcilroy' Nike Driver.”

Silence...long silence...

“Rodney if you broke that driver, you're in deep s*@t!”

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March 2017 Costa Link Magazine.qxp_Editorial Layout 21/02/17 4:32 pm Page 35

Eco Windows PVC & ALUMINIUM YOUR ECO HOUSE

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March 2017 Costa Link Magazine.qxp_Editorial Layout 21/02/17 4:32 pm Page 36

your MIND ownB BUSI

H T N O M E H T F BUSINESS O

PRINTING COMPANY, BENALMADENA 19.950â‚Ź

This print business specialising in printing logos and designs on clothing, beer towels, mugs, mouse mats etc. as well as shop and vehicle signage has been established on the Costa del Sol for 16 years. The owner has other business commitments and has scaled the operation down and it is now run part time from home, but could be expanded again very easily.

www.business-sales-spain.com Telephone: 951 254 222 Mobile: 663 061 669 info@business-sales-spain.com

March 2017 Costa Link Magazine.qxp_Editorial Layout 21/02/17 4:32 pm Page 37

BUSINESS SINESS

SALES

&

RENTALS

WANTED! dead or alive

RESTAURANT LA CALA REWARD UP TO 70.000 EURO WE URGENTLY NEED MORE BUSINESSES FOR SALE To receive updates on all new instructions go to: www.facebook.com/business.sales.spain and press like.

March 2017 Costa Link Magazine.qxp_Editorial Layout 21/02/17 4:32 pm Page 38

your MIND ownB B U S I

Advertising your business for s NO up front fees NO hidden charges

Popular Sports Bar/Restaurant 75.000€

Sports themed bar and restaurant Large regular clientèle With an excellent reputation on the outskirts of Marbella.

Well Known Card and Party Shop in Mijas Costa 25.000€ Established on the Costa del Sol for 10 years.

Highly visible from the main road.

Selection of FANTASTIC Restaurants 25.000€ - 190.000€

Benalmadena, Calahonda, Duquesa, Estepona, Fuengirola, Mijas, Sabinillas & San Pedro. All with VERY HIGH ratings on Tripadvisor...

Curtain and Fabric Shop Fuengirola 34.950€ Well known curtain and fabric shop.

Established for twelve years.

The business will be sold to include all stock.

www.business-sales-spain.com Telephone: 951 254 222 Mobile: 663 061 669 info@business-sales-spain.com

March 2017 Costa Link Magazine.qxp_Editorial Layout 21/02/17 4:32 pm Page 39

BUSINESS S I N E S S

S A L E S

&

R E N TA L S

for sale in Spain and the UK NO advertising fees NO sale - NO fee

Holiday Property Rental Agency, 78.000€

Located in the Marbella area, established in 2006 Well known on the Costa del Sol, in a very busy location Offering 40 high end properties for short term holiday rentals

Laundry - Torremolinos 35.000€

This well established laundry has been trading for over 20 years.

It is located in a very high profile position on a very busy road.

Parking is available nearby and there is constant foot fall.

Large House in Coin set in 20,000m2: 537.000€

A large house in Coin, let all year on holiday basis producing circa of 100.000€ income each year.

Bar, Bistro in Marbella -100.000€ Choice of 2 from Port 35.000€ A Quality Bar-Bistro is located in one of the best positions in Europe Car Body Shop & Sprayers, Marbella: In the second line this highly visible to visitor to the port Both in great locations in Marbella from 35.000€ Refurbished to a very high standard

WE URGENTLY NEED MORE BUSINESSES FOR SALE To receive updates on all new instructions go to: www.facebook.com/business.sales.spain and press like.

March 2017 Costa Link Magazine.qxp_Editorial Layout 21/02/17 4:32 pm Page 40

BOB’S LUCK’S-A-CHANGING...

Bob is in a casino playing pontoon. He's had a miserable run and lost almost everything.

‘Surely my luck must change’ he thinks ‘I'll give it one last go.’ He pulls from his pocket the deeds to his house. This represents everything he has left in this world. The croupier deals the cards. First a jack, then a six ‘Sixteen - what am I going to do.’ He stares vacantly at the two cards in his hand, as his future seems to ebb away. Suddenly a leprechaun appears on his shoulder and looks at the cards. It starts jumping up and down saying “Twist, twist.” Bob looks disbelievingly at the leprechaun. “But If I lose this I've lost my house.” “Twist, twist” cries the leprechaun. Bob eventually decides to trust the leprechaun. “Twist” he says to the croupier. It is a two. Huge sigh of relief, ‘I'm OK’ Bob thinks. “Twist” the leprechaun, says, But it’s eighteen I've got a good chance with that.” “Twist,” “Are you sure?” “Yeah, you'll be OK. Twist!” Bob agonises for a few seconds and eventually reasons that the leprechaun was right last time so he goes for it. The croupier draws another card - an ace! “Wow” says Bob thinking he could now recover all he lost earlier. He is just about to place his cards face down when... “Twist, twist” “But I've got 19. If I twist I'll probably go bust.” “Twist, go on!” Bob thinks to himself that the leprechaun hasn't let him down yet so he decides to back it one last time. “The croupier draws the card. Slowly Bob reaches for it and pulls it up to his hand. He looks at it. A two. Twenty-One, a five-card trick. He has done it. He's got his house back, recovered all his money and made a few grand on top. Yeesss! The leprechaun who has now stopped jumping up and down is motionless, staring at the cards.

It turns to Bob and says “You jammy b**tard!”

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March 2017 Costa Link Magazine.qxp_Editorial Layout 21/02/17 4:33 pm Page 41

Inland Property Specialist Thinking of putting your property on the market?

Selling, Buying or Renting contact us directly or visit our website at: www.olivebranchpropertiesspain.com info@olivebranchpropertiesspain.com

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March 2017 Costa Link Magazine.qxp_Editorial Layout 21/02/17 4:33 pm Page 42

March 2017 Costa Link Magazine.qxp_Editorial Layout 21/02/17 4:33 pm Page 43

March 2017 Costa Link Magazine.qxp_Editorial Layout 21/02/17 4:33 pm Page 44

A ROWDY CROWD...

A Man’s World A GUY GOES TO SEE THE DOCTOR...

Two guys are sitting on a bar stool. One starts to insult the other one. He screams, “I slept with your mother!” The bar gets quiet as everyone listens to see what the other weasel will do. The first again yells, “I SLEPT WITH YOUR MOTHER!” The other says, “Go home dad you’re drunk.”

A guy goes to see the doctor... Because he's been a little too well endowed, shall we say.

In fact, it's 25 inches long. He can't get any women to have sex with him.

Anyway, the doctor says there's nothing he can do medically, but sends him to see a witch that he thinks might be able to help.

The Witch takes a look at the problem (yikes!) and tells him to go to a particular pond, deep in the forest, and talk to a frog that lives there. "Ask the frog to marry you and each time the frog says no, you'll be 5 inches shorter." Worth a try, he thinks, and off he dashes into the forest, as anyone in this sort of joke would. Finds the pond and sees the frog on the other side, sitting on a log.

"Will you marry me?" he calls to the frog.

Frog looks at him, disinterested at best, and calls back, "No." Guy looks down, sure enough, he's 5 inches shorter.

Hey, this is great, he thinks - let's try that again.

"Will you marry me?" he asks the frog.

Frog rolls his eyes, and shouts back again, "No!" Twitch - the guy's down to 15 inches. Well that's still a bit excessive, he thinks.

Down another 5 would be perfect. So he calls across again, “Will you marry me?”

Frog yells back, "Look - how many times do I have to tell you? No. No. NO!"

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March 2017 Costa Link Magazine.qxp_Editorial Layout 21/02/17 4:33 pm Page 45

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March 2017 Costa Link Magazine.qxp_Editorial Layout 21/02/17 4:33 pm Page 46

Medical Mayhem Doctor, Doctor... Laughter is the best medicine!

• I prescribed an inhaler for a patient’s cat allergy. He came back a week later saying he was no the better. Turns out, he was spraying the inhaler on the cat.

• “Did you hear what happened to Mel?” one friend said to another. “He was seeing his doctor for six months because of chest pains and shortness of breath. Last week, he dropped dead from cancer.” “That’s terrible,” says the other friend. “Well, I told him a hundred times to go see my doctor.” “Is he any good?” “Good? He’s the best! If he treats you for heart problems… you’ll die of heart problems.”

• My husband’s new “unbreakable” titanium eyeglasses broke. When he took the many pieces back to the optometrist to have the glasses replaced, the assistant asked what had happened.

“They fell under the lawn mower,” he explained.“Oh,” she said, nodding. “Were you wearing them at the time?”

• Mr. Harper sued a hospital, saying that after his wife had surgery there, she lost all interest in sex. A hospital spokesperson replied, “Mrs. Harper was admitted for cataract surgery. All we did was correct her eyesight.”

• My patient announced she had good news… and bad. “The medicine for my earache worked,” she said. “What’s the bad news?” I asked. “It tasted awful.” Since she was feeling better, I didn’t have the heart to tell her they’re called eardrops for a reason.

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46

PET TRANSPORT SPAIN-UK, UK-SPAIN • Fully licensed • First class conditions • All paperwork dealt with Tel: 630 197 435

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March 2017 Costa Link Magazine.qxp_Editorial Layout 21/02/17 4:33 pm Page 47

THE ENGLISH DENTAL PRACTICE Dr. Alex McCubbin

Susana Lucena - Hygienist

Tel: 952 466 056 www.englishdentalpractice.com info@englishdentalpractice.com

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Medical Tips

March 2017 Costa Link Magazine.qxp_Editorial Layout 21/02/17 4:34 pm Page 48

12 SIGNS OF BREAST CANCER... Do YOU recognise these 12 signs of breast can-

cer? Viral photo of lemons with 'symptoms' such as dimpling and skin erosion shows that lumps aren't the only red flags to look for: Know Your Lemons image created by charity Worldwide Cancer. It shows 12 lemons showing 'symptoms' of breast cancer such as dimpling and growing veins. Cancer patient Erin Smith Chieze shared the image on Facebook her post has since been viewed by more than three million people if you missed it here at is a simple guide to go by.

THICK MASS: A sudden thickening of the breast tissue can be a sign of a serious underlying condition such as lobular or inflammatory breast cancer

INDENTATION: Some people notice a dip, or dent, in the breast. This can be because the cancer is tethered to the breast tissue and so pulls it inwards.

SKIN EROSION: In rare cases cancer that is growing under the skin can break through and create a wound.

HEAT OR REDNESS: If the breast feels warm to touch or there's redness one-third of the breast, it can be a sign of inflammatory breast cancer.

NEW FLUID: Spontaneous nipple discharge on one side, which may be blood stained, brown or clear, might mean there is something in the breast that is causing irritation.

DIMPLING: Dimpled skin is a common sign of inflammatory breast cancer.

BUMP: A localised swelling, bulge or bump on the breast should always be investigated

GROWING VEIN: Changes such as dilated veins can be a sign that cancer is blocking a blood vessel.

RETRACTED NIPPLE: Developing an inverted nipple - i.e. not being born with one - which can't be drawn out, may suggest a lump behind the nipple is pulling it in.

NEW SHAPE OR SIZE: Any change in shape or size not associated with the menstural cycle should be investigated ORANGE PEEL SKIN: Skin that has ridges or appears pitted, like the skin of an orange, can be caused by a build up of fluid in the breast.

INVISIBLE LUMP: Even there are many other symptoms, it's crucial to always check your breasts for lumps.

A cancerous lump often feels hard and immovable like a lemon seed.

A lump is by no means the only possible symptom of cancer, but it's crucial to check your breasts regularly If in any doubt please go and seek medical attention as soon as possible.

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CHECK OUT... Our website at www.costalinkmagazine.com for lots more Medical Tips!

March 2017 Costa Link Magazine.qxp_Editorial Layout 21/02/17 4:34 pm Page 49

LO ECIA FFER SP

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Lifetime Discount for families on the Mas Salud Plan Terms & conditions apply

Health & Well Being

March 2017 Costa Link Magazine.qxp_Editorial Layout 21/02/17 4:34 pm Page 50

8 CLEVER COCONUT OIL TRICKS & USES!

If you have been looking for the miracle product you’ve been missing from your life, look no further! Coconut oil can be as versatile as the person using it. Not only is coconut oil easy to find, it’s a natural alternative to many household items, and has a great smell!

USE IT AS MAKEUP REMOVER...

Stubborn lipstick? Mascara that won’t budge? Place a bit room temperature coconut oil on a flannel or hot wash cloth or cotton wool ball, and swipe gently back and forth until the makeup is removed.

USE IT AS A HAIR MASK...

Dry, frizzy, limp hair? Work room temperature coconut oil throughout the hair and massage your scalp rubbing it into the roots. Put a shower cap on and allow to sit for an hour. Wash and rinse with two rounds of shampoo. Voila! Shiny, moisturized tresses. Coconut oil acts as a natural conditioner. You can also rub a few drops on your palms and run them through your hair as a natural anti-frizz charm.

USE IT TO EXFOLIATE...

Mix 1 part coconut oil to 2 parts sugar to create a DIY scrub. This can be used on stubborn areas such as the knees and elbows, but given that coconut oil is food safe, feel free to use it as a lip scrub as well! It can also be applied to lips as a natural, easy, one ingredient chapstick.

Use it in place of shaving cream

USE IT IN PLACE OF SHAVING CREAM...

Apply a layer of coconut oil to your legs or any other area. Avoid placing this near areas that could be sensitive. Shave as you normally would, and watch the razor glide effortlessly, leaving not a hair in its path! Once you rinse it off, experience soft, moisturized skin!

APPLY TO NAILS TO HYDRATE & STENGTHEN...

Massage a small amount of coconut oil into nail beds and cuticles. Allow to sit and absorb into the skin and nails. Rinse if needed, otherwise allow it to remain on as a moisturizer. Enjoy shiny, healthy nails as a result!

USE IT TO HEAL DRY, CRACKED FEET...

If your feet need some pampering, look no further than coconut oil. Simply soak feet to soften, create a coconut oil scrub to remove dead skin, and then apply a mixture of equal parts coconut oil and shea butter to heal and moisturise.

DIY DEODORANT...

Want to stay off chemicals and metals used in factory bought deodorant? Use it as a base along with shea butter and Baking Soda to make your own deodorant.

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CHECK OUT... our website www.costalinkmagazine.com for more health & wellbeing features

March 2017 Costa Link Magazine.qxp_Editorial Layout 21/02/17 4:35 pm Page 51

Alhaurín Dental Centre Free Initial Consultation!

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Telephone: 654 996 026 by appointment only www.alhaurindentalcentre.com We are near the Centro De Meditatacion Kadampa, near Lauro Golf “Casa Soraya” Nº47 Camino Fuente Del Perro, AlhaurÍn El Grande, Malaga 29120 - A404 Km 12

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March 2017 Costa Link Magazine.qxp_Editorial Layout 21/02/17 4:35 pm Page 52

A Breaded Disaster...

An Englishman, a Scotsman and an Irishman are all working on a construction site, building a new skyscraper in London. It's lunchtime and they're all sat atop the building.

The Englishman opens up his lunchbox to see what his wife has packed him.

"Ugh... Ham and cheese sandwich... again. Im sick of ham and cheese sandwiches, it's the same every bloody day. If I get another ham and cheese sandwich in my lunch box tomorrow I'm jumping off the top of this building."

Next, the Scotsman opens up his lunch box.

"Aackk, jam sandwich... again. I cannee go on like this eating jam sandwiches every day of me life! If I get the same again tomorrow I'm jumping as well."

Next it's the Irishman's turn. "Ohh for gods sake! Not another egg and cress sandwich!

That's the fourth one in a row this week! I'm with you boys, one more egg and cress sandwich and I'm jumping!" So next day they sit at the top of the building to have lunch. One by one they open up their lunch boxes... The Englishman finds another ham and cheese sandwich, so off he jumps, and splats into the ground below. The Scotsman finds another jam sandwich...

"HEY, ch eese Off he goes: Splat. The Irishman, egg & cress sandwich... & ham a gain..."

Splat.

A week or so later later the three widows are talking at the memorial service. The English widow says, through tears, "I still can't believe it, had no idea George hated ham and cheese so much, if only i'd known..."

The Scottish widow says "Duncan did say he was getting a bit bored of Jam, but I didn't realise he hated it that much, I just wish he'd have let me know how he really felt."

The Irish widow says "I... I just don't understand...

Paddy packed his own lunch."

52

March 2017 Costa Link Magazine.qxp_Editorial Layout 21/02/17 4:35 pm Page 53

ALL REVVED UP

March 2017 Costa Link Magazine.qxp_Editorial Layout 21/02/17 4:36 pm Page 54

LUXURY 4X4’S

The Huge Rolls Royce Cullinan has been spotted testing in the snow.

The light disguise worn by the SUV means it’s easy to see the car’s styling, taking Ghost and Phantom design cues and applying them to a large, boxy SUV format and the door handles suggesting that the Cullinan will get suicide style doors.

The Q8 will reputedly look more aggressive and sporting than the Q7, designed to tackle rival offerings – including the likes of the BMW X6 and Mercedes-Benz GLE Coupe.

The Range Rover Velar will sit between the The Evoke and the Sport also hoping to entice buyers of the X6 and the GLE. The Mercedes-Maybach G 650 Landaulet is a super luxury fourdoor convertible V12 bi-turbo. The convertible roof only opens up for those sat in the back, while the two rear seats are plucked from the S-Class Pullman. Just 99 will be made and it will go on sale later this year The Lamborghini Urus is finally going into production in 2018 powered by a 4.0-litre twin turbo V8 it will be the cheapest Lamborghini you can buy at around 170.000€ and is expected to attract new customers.

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March 2017 Costa Link Magazine.qxp_Editorial Layout 21/02/17 4:36 pm Page 55

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March 2017 Costa Link Magazine.qxp_Editorial Layout 21/02/17 4:36 pm Page 56

Fried Egg, Smoked Salmon & Avocado Toastie..

Ingredients:

Why not make your Mum a brunch to remember.

Use a heart shaped cutter to create a specially shaped sandwich..

•Knob of butter

•2 Slices white bread •½ Ripe avocado

•½ Lemon, plus a wedge to serve •Handful Watercress •1 Large Egg

•Smoked Salmon

1) Heat a large frying pan over a medium heat. Butter both sides of each slice of bread, then cut a large heart (or circle) out of the centre of one slice using a knife or biscuit cutter. Place the slices of bread, including the cut-out piece, into the frying pan and cook for 2 mins until golden. While the bread is cooking, slice the avocado and squeeze over the lemon juice. Toss the watercress in a little lemon juice, too.

Method:

2) Flip the bread over, then crack the egg into the cut-out hole. After 1-2 mins, the whole slice of bread and cut-out piece should be golden brown on both sides. Transfer to a plate (eat the cut-out as a chef’s perk, if you like!). Cover the pan with a lid, or some foil, and lower the heat.

Continue cooking for a further 1-2 mins until the egg is done to your liking.

3) Top the toasted slice of bread with the avocado, smoked salmon and watercress, and season with a twist of pepper. Put the egg-in-the-hole slice on top and serve with an extra wedge of lemon, if you like.

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March 2017 Costa Link Magazine.qxp_Editorial Layout 21/02/17 4:36 pm Page 57

Stran

Strange Strangebuttrue...

March 2017 Costa Link Magazine.qxp_Editorial Layout 21/02/17 4:36 pm Page 58

FOLLOWING THE LAW OF THE LAND...

Sunandha Kumariratana, was a queen consort of Siam. She was a daughter of Siamese King Mongkut (Rama IV) and Princess Consort Piam.

She was the half-sister and first wife of King Chulalongkorn (Rama V) of Siam (now Thailand).

On 31 May 1880, 19-year-old Queen Sunanda was aboard a boat en route to the Bang Pa-In Royal Palace when her vessel suddenly capsized, tossing the pregnant queen and her one-year-old daughter into the water.

There were many onlookers, however none jumped in to lend a helping hand. At that time, touching the queen, even to save her life, was punishable by death.

the queen could grab them to remain afloat. But she could not swim, and both queen and princess disappeared into the dark water, untouched by commoners’ hands.

The following year, King Chulalongkorn, overcome with grief, erected a marble obelisk at Bang Pa-In Palace to commemorate his wife, daughter, and unborn child.

The final findings of the queens death recorded by H.G Quaritch Wales in book ‘Siamese State Ceremonies’ over 50 years later, is that court officials were enforcing a law set forth in the Kata Mandirapala (book of palace law). Onlookers were threatened that anyone who touched the royal consort would be executed, potentially along with their entire families.

GARDEN CENTER L I N D AV I S TA

Some quick-thinking bystanders threw buoyant coconuts into the water, hoping

58

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March 2017 Costa Link Magazine.qxp_Editorial Layout 21/02/17 4:36 pm Page 59

March 2017 Costa Link Magazine.qxp_Editorial Layout 21/02/17 4:36 pm Page 60

FINANCIAL NEWS

INTERESTING TIMES AHEAD... The Eurozone faces a similar issue to the UK,

in that a weaker currency may drive up inflation levels. The European Commission Vice President has suggested that ECB policy makers should consider the implications of higher inflation by looking to increase interest rates in 2017 The economic forecasts released by the executive arm for the EU increased the UK’s growth projection from 1% to 1.5% for 2017, however its worth pointing out that’s still 0.5% lower than the 2% growth seen in 2016. The report was considerably positive for the Eurozone suggesting that for the first time in a decade, all the 19 economies that use the Euro are forecasted to grow in 2017 and 2018.On the flip side, there were obvious concerns with regards to the number of key elections across member states coupled with uncertainty across global superpowers.

Number of EU nationals working in the UK starts to fall... EU nationals working in the UK began falling in the last quarter of 2016. This has added to evidence that employers are finding it increasingly difficult to attract and retain business and staff from Europe since our decision to leave the EU last year. Figures from the Office of National Statistics yesterday showed that there are 2.2m nationals of another EU country, almost 19,000 less than the previous quarter.

The ONS figures add to the evidence that the fall in the value of the pound as a consequence of Brexit are starting to deter workers from Europe. The depreciation of Sterling means that earnings will be worth less in other EU countries. One question hanging over the Brexit debate is whether EU nationals will still have their existing rights. Certainly a lot to think about and the impact upon the £ to Euro interbank rate from 16th January to 16th February has seen the pound move from a low of 1.134 to a high of 1.182. So if the timing of your money transfer is not correct you could be losing out. During this period if you had transferred 50000 euros back to the UK the difference the exchange rate meant you could have lost nearly £1800 if you had chosen the wrong time to transfer your money. To make the most of your transfer talk to an expert and let us know what your needs are contact: stephen@costalinkmagazine.com.

Now Booking Christmas 2017 60

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March 2017 Costa Link Magazine.qxp_Editorial Layout 21/02/17 4:38 pm Page 61

March 2017 Costa Link Magazine.qxp_Editorial Layout 21/02/17 4:38 pm Page 62

What’s On Guide...

25th February to the 4th of March 2017: The Marbella Carnival continues including fun and entertainment in four different areas of the city - Marbella center, San Pedro de Alcantara, Nueva Andalucia and Las Chapas. This is a time where everyone dresses up in costume and participates in a number of activities offered by the city. For more information see: www.carnavaldemarbella.com.

1st March 2017: St. Davids Day Concert - A fantastic trip through the valleys with Ricky Lavazza, Owain Griffiths, Fibi McGregor and Mario Ross. For more information call: 952 47 45 42 or e-mail: boxoffice@salonvarietestheatre.com or visit the website www.salonvarietestheatre.com.

10th of March 2017: International Women’s Day 2017, Costa Women are delighted to be organising the with lots going on empowering women here on the Costa del Sol. Location: Andalucia Lab, Km 189,6, 29604. For more information please contact: ali@costawomen.com 17th to 19th March 2017: Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat: Starring RICKY LAVAZZA as "Joseph" and JOHNNY G as "The Pharaoh". For more information call: 952 47 45 42 or email: boxoffice@salonvarietestheatre.com or visit the website www.salonvarietestheatre.com.

18th of March 2017: FES Dance Marbella@PALACIO CONGRESOS Marbella. It’s a big dance event with amazing choreography!! Anyone who has a relationship with dance can participate in entities may be public or private, some are gyms, APAS, dance academies, cultural associations, box, civic centers, sports centers, schools, etc... You can also do this if you belong to a separate group. Call: 617993336 for more information 24th of March 2017: The Very Best of the Musicals: “The Phantom of the Opera”, “Jersey Boys”, “Oliver”, “Les Miserables”, “Cats”, “Miss Saigon” and more.... Stalls @ 25€, Circle @ 20€ see www.ticketsource.eu/bigmpromotionscall the hotline on 952661819. Doors open at 8pm and the show starts at 8.30pm – Box office and bar will be open from 7.30pm.

Every Monday: Age Care Drop In where people can chat, share experiences and find out about living in Spain at La Iglesia Bar, near Bonanza Square, Benalmadena Costa 11am -12.30pm.

Every Monday: Arts and Crafts Fair in Benahavis at 8pm in the Main Square in Benahavis.

Every Monday: Age Concern Drop In for a coffee and a chat at The Captain’s bar Urb. Las Adelfas No. 11 from 11.30am to 1.00pm.

Every Tuesday: The Costa Women Coffee Club meet every second Tuesday at 10am – 12.30pm for coffee, chats and other activities and is a social group designed to get ladies of all ages together. It’s best to join the group via Facebook or contact Emma on 608 408 771.

Every Tuesday: Age Care Coffee Morning at the Baptist Church, Calahonda, where people can chat, share experiences & take part in a variety of activities. Tel: 952 933 409 for info. 11 am – 1 pm.

Every Tuesday: Age Concern meet at the Manila bar in Los Boliches, next to the Yaramar hotel for Spanish lessons in the afternoon from 3.00pm until 3.45pm. Lifeline 652 537 615.

Every Wednesday: Age Care Drop In where people can chat, share experiences and find out about liv Every Thursday: Age Concern meet at the Manila bar in Los Boliches, next to the Yaramar hotel for advice, support and friendship from 11.00am until 1.00pm. Pop in and meet new people and make new friends. Call 652 537 615.

Every Thursday: Age Care Drop In where people can chat, share experiences and find out about living in Spain held in The Pensioner's Bar, Paseo Maritimo La Cala, 11am-12.30pm.

Every Thursday: Market at Calypso, Calahonda.

Every Thursday: Market at Calypso, Calahonda.

Every Friday: Age Concern meet at El Caballo de Oro in La Cala from 11.30 until 1.00pm. In the main square behind Supersol. Advice, support and friendship. Lifeline 652 537 615.

Every Friday: Hard Rock Cafe: Live music happening every Friday see www.hardrock.com/cafes/marbella.

Every Sunday: FAMA have a car boot sale at the Hippodrome from 9am - 2pm.

Every Sunday: Craft Market in the Marbella Marina on the Teresa Zabell Pier: 12-6pm.

If you have an event, fundraiser or anything else please let us know...

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email: editor@costalinkmagazine.com phone: 951 216 131 or 663 061 669

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ocal Info Emergency Numbers

---

Central number for Fire, Police & Ambulance National Police Local Police Guardia Civil dica

Medical

112 091 092 062

Emergency 061 Ambulance Marbella 902 505 061 Ambulance Coin 952 453 267

Train Timetables 902 240 202 Airports Malaga 952 048 844 Gibraltar 956 773 026

Health Centres

Marbella 952 769 946 Coin 952 452 767 San Pedro 952 787 700

Town Halls

Marbella 952 761 100 San Pedro 952 453 020 La Cala de Mijas 952 493 208 Fuengirola 952 589 300 Estepona 952 801 100

Fire Brigade

Emergency number 080 Marbella 952 774 349 Estepona 952 804 483 Fuengirola 952 461 046

Consulates

British Ireland Denmark Sweden Germany France U.S.A

952 952 952 952 952 952 952

Marbella Coin Estepona Fuengirola San Pedro

952 771 442 952 822 818 952 822 818 952 467 457 952 785 252

352 475 226 604 212 226 474

300 108 373 383 442 590 891

Tourist Information

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Transport

Bus Stations Marbella 952 764 400 Coin 952 450 366 San Pedro 952 781 396 Estepona 952 800249 For a list of complete times www.andalucia.com/travel/bus

Markets

Monday - Marbella (fairground site on east side) Tuesday - Fuengirola (fairground near Los Boliches) Wednesday -Estepona (Avda.

Juan Carlos) La Cala - Feria ground.

Thursday - San Pedro (Recinto Ferial) Calypso (Mijas Costa).

Alhaurin el Grande - (La Fama) Saturday - Coin (Calle Urbano Pineda) & Nueva Andalucia (Next to Centro Plaza the Bullring).

La Cala - Feria ground.

Sunday - Puerto Estepona (Marina).

Cinemas

All the Cinemas listed below show films in English as well as Spanish. Call first to check what is showing that week.

Marbella: Cinesur Plaza del Mar 952 766 941 La Cañada 902 333 231 Puerto Banus: Gran Marbella 952 810 077 Coin: La Trocha 951 315 039 Fuengirola Cinesur Miramar 902 221 622

Chemists

24 hour chemist Urb. Artola, Ctra. Cadiz Km 194. Marbella.

Tel: 952 83 25 89

Taxis

Marbella Taxis 952 774 488 Mijas Costa Taxis 952 476 593

Diary Dates

March 1st: St David’s Day

March 17th: St Patrick’s Day March 19th: Spanish Father’s Day

March 26th: Mothering Sunday (UK) March 26th: Clocks go forward

check out our website www.costalinkmagazine.com for cinema listings in VOSE

March 2017 Costa Link Magazine.qxp_Editorial Layout 21/02/17 4:39 pm Page 65

Harry’s Sports Bar

Marble Floor Polishing Phone Paul: 654 589 218 Before

All Live Sports & Premiere League Football.

Six TV’s & Big Screen.

Full menu...

Sunday roast and homemade tapas.

Large sun terrace.

Open 10am-late, seven days a week.

Upstairs Los Jarales, Calahonda

After

Free advice on how to care for your floors at www.marblefloor.info

GBTV 15 Freesat HD Channels via Satellite Dish including:

NO INTERNET REQUIRED

Call Tom: 603 258 751

March 2017 Costa Link Magazine.qxp_Editorial Layout 21/02/17 4:39 pm Page 66

S TA R S I GN S

A look at what's in store for you during March 2017...

Capricorn

Aquarius

Pisces

Aries

Taurus

Gemini 66

Capricorn, Venus, the planet of love and couples, is retrograde this month through the first half of April. This could be a sign of refocusing on the past, like reconnecting with people after years or being nostalgic. Looking at it from a different angle, the astral configuration of March 2017 will bring a peaceful approach to life in your relationship. March brings you a bizarre situation: Jupiter and Venus are at war within your sign. It’s like you want to get involved in important things but something is holding you back, or you take a step back in order to asses certain details more carefully and to gain a better perspective on things. It’s also possible that family issues temporarily stop you in your tracks. Things become more explained after March 20th 2017. Also then your financial situation improves. During this month take a lot of care health wise it would be a good idea to strengthen your immune system. Get the vitamins out!

Aquarius, Venus the planet of love, is retrograde. It might be time to re-think certain aspects of your love life. The Sun comes into your sign in the first week of the month, it shows that there are financial concerns that interfere with aspects of your relationship and can influence them, or that emotional matters could have an impact upon financial decisions. On the work front by and large, until autumn 2017 you’re ahead of the game because Saturn in your sign is lucky charm and receives the support of Jupiter, the Greater Benefic. You show a particular interest communicating (particularly those of a financial nature), and negotiations all of which will come good. In regard to finances, during the first two weeks of March 2017 Aquarians’ income is stimulated and there’s more interest in business and earnings. You are in a pretty serene mood this month, even if during the first part of the month there might be the occasional agitation.

Pisces, relationships are in the front line of your thoughts for the first part of March 2017, when Mercury in your sign will see you have the power to steer things in the direction of your choosing. Venus, planet of love, is retrograde it’s highly possible that love and professional life intersect. Perhaps you share interest in assets and values with your loved one, or they support you trying to earn more, or emotional choices are influenced by material concerns. On the work front with the Sun in Pisces, you have the opportunity to shine it gives you vitality and has the ability to help you rise. Obviously, in order to be successful you need to work hard. The most important thing is to focus your efforts on goals you want to achieve.

Speaking of winning you might be in for big earnings, but also big spending! Keep things under control!

Make shopping lists and stick to them!

Aries, Venus stays in your sign throughout this month. But there’s a slight problem: on the 4th it starts a retrograde motion and stays that way until April 15th. Your emotions intensified, you get back in touch with friends that you haven’t seen in a long time or an old love may come your way. It could also mean that older issues in your relationship may resurface too. Mars adds passion, but also potential conflicts during the first week. It’s a very active month for you at work too. Venus, Jupiter, Mars and demands Uranus are all in your skies bringing the need for firm decisions, and decisive actions something has to change. Saturn gets involved in the second half of the month and promises achievement and success.

Financial initiative is emphasized after March 10th. After March 13th medical solutions or decisions to improve your lifestyle appear, after March 20th you get back in shape in a spectacular manner.

Taurus, March 2017 isn’t the best month for matters of the heart. Venus is retrograde which may lead to disappointment or a confusing situation. Things start to liven up after March 10th 2017, when Mars enters Taurus. You’re feeling sexier and more confident. If issues get complicated you might be better to talk about things that worry you, with someone you trust. Jupiter in you sign brings with it a great time professionally until October 2017. You are very motivated and well supported until the autumn and even more so during March. Lady luck is on your side! Despite all that, during March 2017 you shouldn’t be surprised if you encounter some obstacles or challenges related to both career and money. Keep an eye on their health during March 2017, particularly during the first and last weeks. If something isn’t right, see a doctor about it without delay!

Gemini, you’re doing well on the emotional front this month. Saturn, and Jupiter are in your sign until autumn 2017 this configuration strengthens relationships, situates them on a solid basis. If you are single now is a great time to get out there and meet that special someone. On the work front during March 2017 both Venus and Jupiter, are brining you luck the astral context is very favourable. The term brings various opportunities and is excellent time for you’re popularity. You receive the support needed in order to achieve your goals. You’re mood is excellent during March 2017, and you are full of vitality from a physical standpoint. In March spring starts to make its presence known, so take your bike and go for a ride, walk, dance, move as much as possible! You’re full of energy, so you should use it.

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Cancer

Leo

Virgo

Libra

Scorpio

Sagittarius

Cancer, during March 2017 it becomes very clear that your home and work life have something in common. Saturn and Venus are hand in hand in your skies meaning it seems that your heart beats for someone who you have professional connections to. March 2017 brings you a lot of professional satisfaction and, as a natural result, also financial gains. Harmonious aspects are formed and this brings achievement and new connections. You make a serious effort and luck is on your side too. You might resume an older project or collaboration. Personal charm and connections help you make progress. Money is coming your way more so than during previous months. Start using your talents and creativity! It’s time to make the most of them. Stress is a constant during this term that’s very dynamic and demanding. It’s all up to you and how you manage it. Don’t neglect your health!

Leo, for the short term, love and luck are on your side. You can build a new relationship or consolidate an old one. Communication is key in order for things to go well though! During March 2017, Venus, the planet of love, increases the likelihood of you finding happiness. A trip in the interest of love or a long-distance relationship isn’t out of the question. During this spring, your professional career goes through a process of re-evaluation. Venus, is in retrograde cycle, drawing your attention toward certain things like professional connections and competitiveness while your efficiency increases. During March focus is on money coming from investments, and connections to financial institutions. Your vitality could be diminished during the first two weeks of March 2017 rest up when you can, try not to take the whole worlds problems on your shoulders!

Virgo, during the first two weeks of March 2017 the Sun is your sign, emphasizing life as a couple and your loved one, this month will see everything revolve around them. During March 2017 you have a particular interest in exploiting practical plans and changes from a financial perspective. In some cases, you could be attracted to joint business idea or investment. Jupiter and Venus are in your skies and, from March 13th Mercury joins them. This is a sign of luck. On the other, Jupiter and Venus can become squanderers or careless when it comes to money. The term is certainly good for accessing or raising funds. Be very careful about accounting, when it comes to friends as well as collaborator though! You are a little tired this month try to focus on priorities, rest enough, and steer clear of coughs and sneezes! For more psychological comfort, you should try positive thinking and not over-analyse.

Libra, Venus the planet of love is in retrograde through your sign this month, this could mean quite a few different things. A former relationship might come to mind again, or an older attempt to get together with someone that didn’t quite work might happen again. But first and foremost you need to understand what you really want. Because the Sun is in your skies meaning that March 2017 becomes a significant month professionally. You attract attention you can show your talent and know-how in the most flattering and attractive manner in order to be appreciated. Throughout March 2017 there’s a close connection collaborations and cash. Exhaustion and stress are a constant presence this month. Sometimes they might affect the functional state of your body, so pay closer attention to your health and take care of yourself! Take time to relax by yourself!

Scorpio, the Sun in your sign during the first two weeks of the month gives light to romance and amorous opportunities to show up more often. On March 10th Mars enters your sign giving you feel a lot of enthusiasm and drive. Creativity and talent, become more important during March 2017. Venus’ retrograde motion brings a certain harmony in your professional life. You are a success if you do things that you’re attracted to in your heart that you truly like. Even love could drive you toward progress in March. Financially, your effort is rewarded and your long-term perspective is improved. Don’t be afraid to get started on something new professionally if that’s what you need to do in order to make the most of your talents! Try not to go overboard with excesses this month; it’s a great time to get exercising or get involved in a group sport.

Sagittarius, Venus is in retrograde this month. This will see your attention drawn toward the basic elements of happiness you’re your relationship. You want to experiment with your feelings, analyse them and find ways that can fulfill you. The astral climate of March 2017 emanates love. Events can cover the whole gamut, from falling for someone to unforgettable physical experiences. They’re all meant to clarify what you want, what you need, and what suits you. During the first two weeks of March 2017 the Sun and Mercury see you interest heightened toward home and family, but also in matters related properties and place of work. You can make your talent and expressivity shine, helping you in promoting and publicity. All of this will contribute to increasing income. On the health front it’s time to take matters into your own hands and solve what needs to be solved, particularly if it involves older issues.

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March 2017 Costa Link Magazine.qxp_Editorial Layout 21/02/17 4:39 pm Page 69

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puzzle Link The Words

Solutions on page 80

it out

In each of these puzzles, three words are listed. All you have to do is find another word that can either precede or follow each word linking them:

1)

____

WINTER

DROP

FLAKE

3)

_____

SPRING

RINGS

SPANISH

____

STEAM

ORE

AGE

2) 4) 5)

______ _____

BLUE

WORTHY

KNIFE

FUND

COTTAGE

NATIONAL

Guess The Celeb

A

B

Sudoku

Brain Teaser CAN YOU FIND THE MISSING GOAT?

70

THE SOLUTION IS ON PAGE 80...

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Crossword

Across: 1. Pertaining to plants (6) 4. Abduct (6) 7. Ulcerated (9) 9. Girl's name (4) 10. Expired (4) 11. London River (5) 13. Annually (6) 14. Take away (6) 15. Light separators (6) 17. Narrow stretch of water (6) 19. Age (5) 20. Custom (4) 22. Chamber (4) 23. Give up (9) 24. Citrus fruits (6) 25. Attractive (6) Down: 1. Comfortable (6) 2. Brave (4) 3. Finally (6) 4. Custodian (6) 5. Act (4) 6. Pool of water (6) 7. Twice-married offenders (9) 8. Explosive fuse (9) 11. Sweetheart (5) 12. Incisors (5) 15. Doorway (6) 16. Provokes (6) 17. Picturesque (6) 18. Punctual (6) 21. French currency (4) 22. 24 sheets (4)

Name The Film

A Following a family of superheroes who are B forced to hide their powers and live a quiet life. But they still desire to help people survive a villain and his killer robot. (2004).

Three guys wake up from a bachelor party in Las Vegas, with no memory of the previous night and the bachelor missing It is first installment of this trilogy (2009).

DAY

GOOD

Say What You See...

tens ions

thing=thing thing=thing thing=thing

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The Jokespage

Jokespage

What do you call an Irish spider?

Paddy long legs.

Bob walked into a sports bar around 9:58 PM. He sat down next to a blonde at the bar and stared up at the TV....

The 10 PM news was coming on. The news crew was covering the story of a man on the ledge of a large building preparing to jump. The blonde looked at Bob and said, "Do you think he'll jump?" Bob said, "You know, I bet he'll jump." The blonde replied, "Well, I bet he won't." Bob placed a €20 bill on the bar and said, "You're on!" Just as the blonde placed her money on the bar, the guy on the ledge did a swan dive off the building, falling to his death. The blonde was very upset, but willingly handed her €20 to Bob. "Fair's fair. Here's your money." Bob replied, "I can't take your money. I saw this earlier on the 5 PM news, so I knew he would jump."

The blonde replied, "I did, too, but I didn't think he'd do it again."

Bob took the money.

72

Lost at Sea… Two Irishmen, Patrick & Michael, were adrift in a lifeboat following a dramatic escape from a burning freighter.

While rummaging through the boat's provisions, Patrick stumbled across an old lamp. Secretly hoping that a genie would appear, he rubbed the lamp vigorously. To the amazement of Patrick, a genie came forth.

This particular genie, however, stated that he could only deliver one wish, not the standard three. Without giving much thought to the matter, Patrick blurted out, "Make the entire ocean into Guinness!" The genie clapped his hands with a deafening crash, and immediately the entire sea turned into the finest brew ever

sampled by mortals. Simultaneously, the genie vanished. Only the gentle lapping of Guinness on the hull broke the stillness as the two men considered their circumstances. Michael looked disgustedly at Patrick whose wish had been granted. After a long, tension-filled moment, he spoke: "Nice going Patrick! Now we're going to have to pee in the boat."

A blonde lady gets a job as a physical education teacher of 16 year olds. She notices a boy at the end of the field standing alone, while all the other kids are running around having fun kicking a football. She takes pity on him and decides to speak to him. 'You ok?' she asks. 'Yes,' he replies.'You can go and play with the other kids, you know,' she says. 'It's best I stay here,' he says.'Why's that, sweetie?' asks the blonde. The boy looks at her and says: "Because I'm the goal keeper!

There where two Irish men on a bulding site.

One of them said “Can you help me find my ear?” The other man said “Is this it?” The other man said “No, mine has got a pencil behind it.”

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March 2017 Costa Link Magazine.qxp_Editorial Layout 21/02/17 4:43 pm Page 74

WHAT KIND OF BOW CAN’T BE TIED? A RAINBOW!

17th marc h d d y a ’ P s t Day! S y p Hap WHAT DO YOU CALL A CLUMSY IRISH DANCE? A JIG MISTAKE!

HOW DID THE IRISH JIG GET STARTED? TOO MUCH TO DRINK AND NOT ENOUGH BATHROOMS

ama zin g.. .

ca n

ock maze to find the pot of go hamr ld? s e h th g u ro th t e ug yo

start 74

finish

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WHAT IS A LEPRECHAUN: IT’S TYPE OF FAIRY IN IRISH FOLKLORE. THEY ARE USUALLY DEPICTED AS LITTLE BEARDED MEN, WEARING A COAT AND HAT, WHO PARTAKE IN MISCHIEF. THEY ARE SOLITARY CREATURES WHO SPEND THEIR TIME MAKING AND MENDING SHOES AND HAVE A HIDDEN POT OF GOLD differencesATbetween the two THE END OF THE RAINBOW. IF CAPTURED BY A HUMAN, THEY OFTEN GRANT THREE WISHES IN EXCHANGE FOR THEIR FREEDOM.

H S D Z I X Q P G A B L C X Y X S H K R R A P V J P L Y S C L Q I A E L ML C T O R N O J K H J R MB K Q U V Q A C C S X MU Q I R P H E C S I Q N S H V Can O H Uyou E O see R K the E E Nten R U B X I K R C D H C C I X B K A N Minnie’s? Answers below...

S C E O Z R I T K R N O WH X N E E R G R MV F A MWWC S L Y K MT H D L Z O O V T E V J T E A X X T L L R K C D R C WT P O T O F G O L D C Y P L O T N G Z U L P Q G B G U E T S P D N V E J H K A Z X F L S G N I N R O ME H T F O P O T

find the lost words in the wordsearch

Give y Mickee Som r Colou

top of the morning luck of the irish pot of gold leprechaun shamrock st patrick rainbow clover green gold

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puzzle Trivia Quiz Answers

1) Turkey 2) Leonardo Da Vinci 3) Your Grace 4) Shirley Temple 5) Saturn 6) The Crimean War 7) Diamond 8) David Bowie 9) An exocannibal eats only enemies An indocannibal eats only friends 10) Arabian Peninsula 11) 6 12) Martin Luther King Jr 13) London Gatwick 14) The planet Uranus 15) Welsh 16) Yangtze 17) Sweden 18) Galileo Galilei 19) Polygamy is one husband, several wives.

Polyandry is one wife, several husbands.

20) 3 Answers: a: Buzz Aldrin, Astronaut b: Captain Nemo, in Jules Verne's novels: 20,000 Leagues under the Sea c: Yogi Berra, baseball player 21) Father Ted 22) 27 23) Queensland 24) Odin 25) New York 26) School Bus Driver

Answers from 24, 70 & 71

it out

Link The Words

1) SNOW 2) CHEESE 3) ONION 4) TRUST 5)IRON

Guess The Celeb a) Ashton Kutcher b) Meghan Markle

Brain Teaser

COULD YOU FIND THE MISSING GOAT?

Crossword Solution

Sudoku Solution

Name The Film

a) The Incredibles (2004) b) The Hangover (2009)

Say What You See 1) Day Break

80

2) Good Intentions

3) All Things Being Equal

March 2017 Costa Link Magazine.qxp_Editorial Layout 21/02/17 4:47 pm Page 81

March 2017 Costa Link Magazine.qxp_Editorial Layout 21/02/17 4:47 pm Page 82

REAL ESTATE

3 Bed Apartment - La Quinta

Built: 116m²

Terrace: 29m²

Bedrooms: 3

Bathrooms: 2

225.000€

Pool: Communal

2 Bed Apartment in Monte Halcones

Built: 159m²

Terrace: 20m²

Bedrooms: 2

Bathrooms: 2

Pool: Communal

Ref N°: ASM-196574

350.000€

Ref N°: ASM-196575

March 2017 Costa Link Magazine.qxp_Editorial Layout 21/02/17 4:47 pm Page 83

Built: 95m²

Terrace: 47m²

Bedrooms: 2

Bathrooms: 2

Pool: Communal

Luxury 1 Bed Apartment in 5 Star Resort

Built: 65m²

Terrace: 24m²

Bedrooms: 1

Bathrooms: 2

Pool: Communal

355.000€

Ref N°: ASM-196576

167.500€

from

2 Bedroom Apartment Atalaya Golf

Ref N°: ASM-196573

March 2017 Costa Link Magazine.qxp_Editorial Layout 21/02/17 4:47 pm Page 84