Planet JH 10.21.15

JACKSON HOLE’S ALTERNATIVE VOICE | PLANETJH.COM | OCTOBER 21-27, 2015

THE

Doctor Out IS

Digging into the activist, altruist roots of adventurer Doc Hayse.

BY JAKE NICHOLS

| PLANET JACKSON HOLE |

2 | OCTOBER 21, 2015

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JACKSON HOLE'S ALTERNATIVE VOICE

VOLUME 13 | ISSUE 41 | OCTOBER 21-27, 2015

8

COVER STORY THE DOCTOR IS OUT Digging into the activist, altruist roots of Doc Hayse.

Cover photo by Sargent Schutt

4 THE BUZZ 6 THE BUZZ 2 14 MUSIC BOX 16 GET OUT 23 THE FOODIE FILES 27 SATIRE 30 ASTROLOGY THE PLANET TEAM PUBLISHER Copperfield Publishing, John Saltas GENERAL MANAGER Andy Sutcliffe / asutcliffe@planetjh.com EDITOR Robyn Vincent / editor@planetjh.com ART DIRECTOR Cait Lee / art@planetjh.com SALES DIRECTOR Jen Tillotson / jen@planetjh.com

SALES EXTRAORDINAIRES Jennifer Marlatt / jmarlatt@planetjh.com Caroline Zieleniewski / caroline@planetjh.com COPY EDITOR Brielle Schaeffer CONTRIBUTORS Mike Bressler, Rob Brezsny, Ryan Burke, Aaron Davis, Kelsey Dayton, Annie Fenn, MD, Natosha Hoduski, Maryann Johanson, Carol Mann, Andrew Munz, Jake Nichols, Ted Scheffler, Tom Tomorrow, Jim Woodmencey

567 W. BROADWAY | P.O. BOX 3249 | JACKSON, WYOMING 83001 307-732-0299 | WWW.PLANETJH.COM MEMBER: National Newspaper Association, Alternative Weekly Network, Association of Alternative Newsmedia

October 21, 2015

By Meteorologist Jim Woodmencey

C

ooler temperatures and some stormy weather earlier this week gave Jackson Hole much more of a fall feel.

That kind of weather usually spurs the local crowd to head south for one last taste of warmer and drier weather before winter arrives, maybe to somewhere in the Desert Southwest. There has been some stormy weather down that way too this October, and timing a road trip south this fall might be a little trickier than usual.

SPONSORED BY GRAND TETON FLOOR & WINDOW COVERINGS

We’ve had a few cool mornings around here this past week, with more than a few days dipping into the lower 20’s, putting a little frost on the pumpkin. Average low temperatures this week are in the lower 20’s, so maybe expect a little more of that kind of col, more often. The record low temperature this week is 3-degrees. That was back on October 24th, 1995 Getting that cold would be good enough reason to go south, way south.

The hottest we have ever been here in Jackson during this week is 75-degrees, which occurred on October 22nd & 23rd, 2003. We actually had an entire week during mid-October that year with temperatures in the 70’s every day. Funny thing was, by the end of that October the high was only 30 degrees, and the morning low temperature was down to 3-degrees on Halloween. What a difference a week’s time can make during the fall in Jackson Hole, eh?

55 22 75 3

AVERAGE PRECIPITATION: 1.17 inches RECORD PRECIPITATION: 3.21 inches (1972) AVERAGE SNOWFALL: 1.5 inches RECORD SNOWFALL: 18 inches

Carpet - Tile - Hardwood - Laminate Blinds - Shades - Drapery Mon - Fri 10am - 6pm Open Tuesdays until 8pm 1705 High School Rd Suite 120 Jackson, WY 307-200-4195 www.tetonfloors.com | www.tetonblinds.com

OCTOBER 21, 2015 | 3

Jim has been forecasting the weather here for more than 20 years. You can find more Jackson Hole Weather information at www.mountainweather.com

WHAT’S COOL WHAT’S HOT

NORMAL HIGH NORMAL LOW RECORD HIGH IN 2003 RECORD LOW IN 1995

| PLANET JACKSON HOLE |

JH ALMANAC

| PLANET JACKSON HOLE |

4 | OCTOBER 21, 2015

THE BUZZ Commercial Consequences Looking at last week’s three-day housing meeting, the Alliance’s new development study, and the dangers of a more commercially developed valley.

BY NATOSHA HODUSKI

J

acob Brown was a longtime Jackson resident before he was priced out of the valley and forced to move his family to Victor. “The Jackson dream is dead,” he said.

“No one has time to enjoy Jackson anymore, because the Jackson dream has become working three jobs to support your family and commuting at least an hour every day.”

At the time, Brown was purchasing a giant stuffed pink unicorn for his daughter to apologize for the 20-hour shift he had just worked. It is not the first time Brown has found himself in this situation.

And in Teton Valley, rents and home prices are on the rise, too. According to data supplied by the U.S. Department of Housing and Urban Development, fair market value for rentals in Victor has risen almost 14 percent in just the last year.

To address the valley’s housing woes, the Workforce Housing Action Plan, released in August by the Town of Jackson and Teton County, was placed under the microscope during a three-day joint town and county meeting last week. The plan could become a 10-year blueprint to attempt to house 65 percent of the local workforce, a goal set forth in the 2012 Comprehensive Plan.

During the meetings, the meatiest topics included appointing a housing coordinator as soon as possible, investigating revenue streams, attempting to balance incentives for private construction of affordable housing without limiting publicly-sponsored housing, and reforming the housing authority as a joint effort between the town and county.

To give public officials something to chew on during the meetings, the Jackson Hole Conservation Alliance timed the release of its Jackson/Teton County Land Development Study to coincide with the meetings. Offering solid numeric recommendations, the study maps out areas of possible land rezoning, compiles estimates of future required housing, and gives recommendations on land-use management.

What the report emphasized is that eventually the Teton County/Jackson area’s supply of land will not support the demand for long-term housing.

In overall development, the study concludes that the town should plan on adding between 950 and 1,190 affordable housing units over the next 10 years to accommodate the stated goal of housing 65 percent of the workforce.

County commission Chairwoman Barbara Allen, a real estate agent, was quick to open day one’s meeting by reminding attendees that the community has been addressing the problem of housing shortages head-on for some time. The community “has not acknowledged the 1,500 affordable rentals [already available],” she said. “There has been a lot of effort made, and [the town and county] want to build on that.”

But according to the Alliance’s Land Development Study,

Jackson is still missing the mark for workforce housing by a long shot, and it will take several tiers of new regulations to support the ballooning demand for housing. The study compiled an analysis of market trends and demand – which predicts that the housing issues will not be appropriately addressed unless Jackson is housing two-thirds of its workforce community – the legality of Transfer of Development Rights (TDR), and practically speaking, how feasible TDR really is.

Public officials at the joint housing meetings unanimously agreed that the Grove is not a sustainable trend and that the private sector is of paramount importance in providing housing. It seems all local officials share the school of thought now that housing issues cannot be met through publicly sponsored housing developments alone. The avenues discussed to meet this demand ranged from density incentives and penny taxes to mandatory mitigation by new businesses. Stakeholder Kelly Lockhart suggested a new tax that every business would be required to pay based on its number of employees. This could be more effective than the current new business mitigation plan that many council members do not believe is accomplishing enough.

Mayor Sara Flitner said that the Marriott’s mitigation plan, for example, fails to do its part. The Marriott is slated to develop housing for approximately just a quarter of its projected workforce need.

The Alliance’s Land Development Study indicates that continued growth of commercial enterprise in the valley is damaging not only to the character of the valley, but to the everyday lives of its citizens. But elected officials, including Flitner and council members Hailey Morton-Levinson and Bob Lenz, were against strengthening language in the Housing Action Plan to regulate future commercial development in the area.

jobs flooding the want ads – some offering $500 sign-on bonuses for unskilled labor – adding more businesses to the problem does not seem to be the solution.

Benjamin is adamant that regulating future commercial development is not the answer. “Step one is not to increase commercial development potential, as we are significantly above our market growth needs,” he said. “We already have more than we need for commercial development potential.”

Step two, he continued, would be to shift some commercial land to residential. “That would ease some of the pressure, because people could not build commercial there, and it would open up the land for residential use,” he said. “That would be significantly harder, but there are opportunities for doing that.”

While it is difficult to calculate the impact of tax revenue from a business, Benjamin said, most commercial development is not necessarily inherently profitable for the community. “When you look at the impacts on infrastructure, roads, sewers, schools, having more people in the parks, trail maintenance, all of those things – no one really looks at that.”

During a break at day one’s housing meeting, a man in the crowd animatedly discussed tiny houses and the standard of living they provide. He could compromise on everything, he said, except for the loss of his library. Adapting to the Kindle is not something he is ready to embrace, as the world grows more and more compact.

“It’s the people who live here who define the character of our community.”

The Battle to Regulate Flitner says she is not ready to sign onto black and white language that would limit commercial development. There are eventualities, she said, that she is not willing to rule out simply for the sake of numbers. “Say there are was a grocery store that was built in East Jackson – that’s commercial square footage, but it would also alleviate some of the traffic issues we’re facing if we had a source like that,” she said.

Craig Benjamin, executive director of the Jackson Hole Conservation Alliance, has been advocating that maintaining the valley’s character hinges on walkable neighborhoods surrounded by parks, affordability, wildlife crossings and a healthy and abundant sustainable wildlife population.

“It’s the people who live here who define the character of our community, and once you drop below that 65 percent threshold, the fabric of the community starts to break down,” he said.

Without tight regulations on commercial development, alliance staffers say they are worried that Jackson will never be able to match the demand for workers. In a cyclical motion, more jobs will always demand more workers, and workers will always need more housing. Hence the best way to help workers find affordable housing, the Alliance asserts, is to limit the number of commercial enterprises that demand workers, and to manage the land already zoned for housing more efficiently.

According to the Alliance’s Land Development Study, Teton County is already well above the mark when it comes to commercial development. With a plethora of unfilled

When Less is More

But scaling back is the way of the future, particularly in a place with finite possibilities for land development.

Last month, internationally acclaimed scientist EO Wilson came to Jackson, what he lauds as one of the most beautiful places on earth. It was with nigh-on Nostradamian acuteness that he spoke of efficiency. According to Wilson, capitalism is the mother of efficiency. It is the trend of the future – or, maybe more poignantly, it is the only plausible future of the future. Denser, smaller, less for more, that’s the feat the world must indefinitely sustain, he said.

The Jackson community sees that unfurling like a case study; density incentives and rezoning are the main recommendations the study suggests. How do we do more with the land we have? How do we manage limited goods for a growing population? How do we preserve what makes Jackson a vibrant community to live in and to visit?

During the first meeting, many concerned citizens spoke. Comments centered on four-tiered apartments and dorm-style living arrangements that juxtaposed sharply against concerns over standard of living issues and a loss of community character.

According to The Blue Ribbon Panel on Workforce Housing, the workforce housed in Jackson Hole has steadily declined since 1990, when at one time nearly 86 percent of workers resided locally. As the middle class is pushed further and further from the place they call home, residents like Brown are left in the lurch.

“Someday I want to do something big, to make my daughter proud, so that she can point to something in my life, and think that what I did was important,” Brown said of dreams he has had to put on hold. Someday Brown wants to hike the El Camino del Diablo trail and maybe write a book about it, but the price of rent and day-to-day expenses have made the idea of taking off work too cost prohibitive. In the meantime, he has more 20-hour days to work to pay rent in a place he doesn’t have time to enjoy.

Officials will vote on the plan next month. PJH

THEM ON US

By JAKE NICHOLS

Military K9 Gunned Down in Powell

A specially trained service dog was shot and killed by a Wyoming man last week after the 10-year-old Belgian Malinois allegedly accosted a cyclist in Powell.

The dog earned a Bronze Star serving in the U.S. Army as a combat dog and in bomb detection. Since returning from Iraq, the dog, named Mike, had been helping Matthew Bessler transition into a normal life by providing comfort to the serviceman who suffers from PTSD and a TBI (traumatic brain injury).

Bessler was out of town when the bicyclist had an altercation with the dog.

“If the guy was actually fending the dog off with a bicycle, (Mike) would have really been barking, and there was no barking,” Bessler told the Powell Tribune. “All there was was just a shot. The guests who were at the house, they said the same thing.

There was no barking. It was just a gunshot.”

The 59-year-old Powell man who shot Mike has not been cited. Bessler has asked for a burial with military honors.

‘Oil’ Vey: Good News and Bad News

Wyoming continues to experience an anomaly when it comes to oil production.

With worldwide prices at half what they were this time last year – $46 a barrel – a slowdown in drilling has certainly been the case in the Cowboy State. However, production from fewer wells soared to a 23-year high over the past summer even as new oil drilling fell to its lowest rig count since 1999.

Still, with little new drilling in the Cowboy State lately, “it’s just a matter of time before oil production follows suit and declines as well,” Robert Godby, a University of Wyoming associate professor of economics, told ABC News. “Wyoming’s economy already is feeling the effects of drilling rig crews packing up and moving out. Vacancy rates are up in places where drilling was occurring as drilling crews have left.”

Getting on the Grid Out West

A sharing of renewable energy sources in the West – like Wyoming’s wind and California’s sun – could save wasted electricity and cut costs.

A study released last week states that a regional integrated power grid in the West could reduce energy costs by roughly $9 billion over the course of 20 years, as well as significantly cut greenhouse gas emissions.

Linking western states together in a power grid beginning with California Independent System Operator and PacfiCorp, the two largest grid operators in the West, would allow power generated by one source to be used where it’s needed most.

The study, conducted by Energy+Environmental Economics, is being considered for implementation.

Typically, if Wyoming was experiencing a particularly blustery day while California was basking in sun, energy generated by the two renewable sources was wasted once every house had its share of electricity. Combining grid operators and adding a total of 11 western states to the grid would help better distribute the power.

Tourist Trap?

3 DAYS ONLY | OCT 30, 31 & NOV 1

at the Rodeo Grounds Parking Lot. 9am to 4pm.

DO NOT SET OUT BRANCHES OR BAGS ON CURB. Pick up free compostable yard waste bags at town hall and recycling center.

Residential Yard Waste only No trash, No dog poop.

Yard waste will be composted locally by Terra Firma Organics rather than trucked 100 miles to landfill. County Residents - the Trash Transfer Station will accept residential yard waste for free during business hours on October 30th & 31st.

OCTOBER 21, 2015 | 5

733.3932 or 733.7678 FOR MORE INFO

| PLANET JACKSON HOLE |

“Sometimes it seems humans just can’t do anything right.” That was the gripping lede in Karen Kaplan’s piece for the LA Times titled “How ecotourists actually make things worse for wildlife.”

An ecological study published in the journal Trends in Ecology & Evolution offered a plethora of reasons tourists who flock to see and support wildlife may actually be doing a whole bunch of bad with the good. The report listed several ways well-intentioned visits can backfire.

Researchers found that many animals were becoming desensitized to human presence to the point their “flight initiation distance” was lowered – meaning animals didn’t feel scared enough to run until humans were much closer to them.

Several national parks throughout the world were part of the study including Grand Teton.

“When ecotourists venture into the wild, they create what amounts to a ‘temporary human shield,’” the study authors wrote. Evidence for this comes from Grand Teton National Park, where the more tourist traffic there was, the less time pronghorn sheep and elk spent in “alert postures.” The animals also gathered in smaller groups when more tourists were nearby.

With Yellowstone National Park visitation for 2015 already shattering previous records at 3.8 million and counting, the study is food for thought. PJH

e e r F

| PLANET JACKSON HOLE |

6 | OCTOBER 21, 2015

THE BUZZ 2 Eco Renegade Reveling in raw discussion with Patagonia founder Yvon Chouinard.

BY ROBYN VINCENT @TheNomadicHeart

PJH: There is an interesting dichotomy between your role as an anti-consumer and your role as head of a company that makes goods for people to consume. How does this work into Patagonia’s business model?

Chouinard: There is only one way to lead and that is by example. All of my Patagonia gear is so old you can’t believe it. Unless I really need it, I don’t get it and I am trying to encourage our own customers to think the same way. That’s why I came up with ads that say, don’t buy this jacket unless you think twice.

We are trying to take responsibility and ownership for our clothes from birth till death and rebirth, and we are making it easy for people to repair their clothes. We opened the largest clothing repair facility in North America and we are creating videos on how to sew buttons and do repairs yourself and we are sending a truck around the country to repair clothes, no matter if they’re Patagonia. We are also selling used stuff in larger stores and our goal is to have nothing go to the landfill. Then we take everything back and recycle it … once you have made the clothing, the best thing is to get people to wear it forever. I am not interested in selling more clothes, I am interested in making great clothes and saving the planet … if we can make a jacket more responsibly than someone else, then it causes less damage and wont end up in a landfill.

I mentioned that I teach fishing classes to kids. You know, I am not out there putting them all on drift boats with a $500 reel and $800 rod because that teaches the wrong message, that you should want to work to get rich so you can afford these things at some point in life. I have them out there with a pole and a line and they are catching fish and they learn they don’t need all that. … I have also taught climbing classes in barefeet.

SHIFT

“C

limate deniers are either dumbasses or crooks.”

Such unadulterated words make Patagonia founder Yvon Chouinard one of this newspaper’s favorite people to speak with. On the heels of Chouinard’s sold-out appearances for SHIFT Festival, an annual gathering and conference that focuses on the inextricable link between conservation and outdoor exploration, The Planet sat down with the environmentalist, outdoor enthusiast and architect of One Percent for The Planet.

With Patagonia, 76-year-old Chouinard, an avid ice and rock climber, kayaker, fisherman, surfer and skier, has crafted a sustainable, eco-focused business model that is swimming against capitalistic currents. It has placed him in a renegade category of entrepreneurship.

Yvon Chouinard has introduced an environmentally focused business model that is testament to his deep-seated desire to protect the planet. it is very in your face – you lose a spot or you don’t. But climate change affects every sport – whether it is kayaking or climbing or skiing. You know, a lot of the ice climbs I have made first ascent on don’t exist anymore – in the Canadian Rockies – Mount Kenya, for example, the route no longer exists.

PJH: How can the Jackson populace become better stewards of this land?

Chouinard: There should be a 1 percent tax that doesn’t go to the Chamber of Commerce to get more people to Jackson Hole.

What gets more people here is having nature in tact. There could be a real estate tax used to make sure that if conservation property comes up for sale, we buy it and protect it … why don’t we have a referendum for the one percent tax or take away the bed tax and replace it with this? All it takes is one person to get behind the idea.

PJH: What strikes you most about the Jackson of yesterday – when your kids built a raft with your climbing rope and floated the Snake River from Dornan’s to Wilson – to the Jackson of today?

Chouinard: Well, they wouldn’t be able to

“Unless I really need it, I don’t get it and I am trying to encourage our own customers to think the same way.”

PJH: What did you take away from the SHIFT Festival?

Chouinard: I learned some things. I mainly started remembering the things I should have said … I talked about how many Surfrider chapters there are [to protect oceans] – 81 and yet fishing? There are 30,000 fishing manufacturers and only 13 belong to One Percent for The Planet and probably most are fishing shops or guides. It is pitiful. Climbing is even worse, the most that happens is they pick up trash at El Cap. With surfing

do it now because they wouldn’t have gotten an invasive species permit (laughs)! I think there is too much coddling of our kids. I see kids being driven to the high school from town [in Jackson]; that is ridiculous. When you hear about “Mile for Mile,” the film about Patagonia park that was screened during the SHIFT Festival, the family that homesteaded that land, when one of the boys was 12 years old and his brother was 14, they rode horses for four days over 100plus miles, fording rivers and snowstorms to go to school … now, we just coddle them and then we have a climber in the Tetons who gets wet in a thunder storm and calls search and rescue. I think it starts with parents. They have to learn to take risks for their kids.

PJH: Let’s talk about mentorship, which you addressed during your talk at the Center Theatre, Oct. 7, how, as a pre-teen you got your start climbing with a group of college kids. It sounded like they might have needed you more than you needed them, though? You were leading everything, right? At any rate, how should mentorship play a role in conservation?

Chouinard: I just didn’t know how to use the gear (laughs). I could scramble pretty good but had to learn the hard way.

I had terrible mentors for kayaking – their idea of mentoring was, “follow us!” My first trip ever was class 3, the next day class 4, and the next day class 5. Over two days I ended up with 15 stitches in my face.

But mentorship can come from a lot of people; it can certainly come from parents or other adult figures, because you are not going to get it in school. So many universities are teaching business and environmental classes in the old way. Kids are demanding that they want to study business and go work for a nonprofit but they are not getting the tools and instruction to do that. I was speaking to design graduate students at Stanford and explaining to them that an important part of design is to cause the least amount of harm in your design. Designers have a lot of power in how they design something – they can design something made out of rare minerals or straw. For example, they can design houses just from the rice straw grown in California. This rice straw has no value and they are wondering what to do with it … you could build 2,000 square foot homes every year with this stuff that is made of thrown-away materials and is earthquake-proof. Look at low-income housing made of sticks, they are bullshit houses – why wouldn’t we do it another way?

I told the audience [during my appearance at SHIFT] that my philosophy is to hang out with older people when you are young and then younger people when you are old. I think everybody in that room could find someone to mentor.

PJH: There may be some mountain folk who disagree with you that surfing is the hardest sport out there (but perhaps those are folks who haven’t surfed before).

Chouinard: Let’s compare surfing with skiing or snowboard-

ing – you learn on the hill that is groomed and you can practice one run over and over and every time you take a lesson, you get better. But with surfing the only lesson is your first day and after that you are on your own. Every day is different and it is super crowded and no one is going to give you gave a wave …

I have seen world class climbers at the age of 30 try to learn to surf and it is pitiful. Learning to surf after 30 is near impossible.

Climbing is a controlled activity and surfing is just a completely different mindset.

PJH: Can you recall a particularly transformative experience in the outdoors?

Chouinard: I used to do expedition climbing and then one day

I was caught in an avalanche in Tibet. One person died and one person broke his back. I came within inches of dying. It was then that I realized I had a responsibility to my family and that it was time to stop expedition climbing – it was a learning experience. PJH

“Tag” Banned; “Red Rover” in Jeopardy

NEWS

By CHUCK SHEPHERD New! Amazing! Awesome!

Low-benefit (but Internet-connected!) devices now on sale (from February’s MacLife magazine): HAPIfork (Bluetoothconnected, alerts you if you’re eating too fast); iKettle (heat water at different temperatures for different drinks, controlled by phone); an LG washing machine that lets you start washing while away (provided, of course, that you’ve already loaded the washer); Kolibree “smart toothbrush” (tracks and graphs “brushing habits”). Also highlighted was the Satis “smart toilet,” which remotely flushes, raises and lowers the seat, and engages the bidet—features MacLife touts mainly as good for “terrorizing guests.”

OF THE

Two suburban Minneapolis elementary schools this fall hired a consulting firm to advise officials on kids’ recess, and the leading recommendations (promoting “safety” and “inclusiveness”) were elimination of “contact” games in favor of, for example, hopscotch. Some parents objected; recess, they said, should be more freestyle, unstructured. (More consultants’ advice: De-emphasize refereed “rules” games in favor of monitors who simply praise effort.) One Minnesota principal noted improvement—fewer fights and nurse visits now—but as one parent said, her child feels that recess is no longer really “playing.”

WEIRD

Bright Ideas

Unapparent Problem, Solved: Vladimir Laurent (an insurance executive in Coral Springs, Fla.) received his U.S. patent on Sept. 29 and can proceed mass-producing “The Shield”—his brainstorm to keep men’s genitalia from dragging on the inside of toilet bowls while they’re seated. Laurent told the South Florida Business Journal that his device was something he “needed, personally” (though he’s aware that not all males experience the sensation). The Shield is basically a cup attached to the bowl by suction that allows movement via a ball-andsocket joint.

Latest Human Rights

Kentucky’s government-ethics law bars gifts from lobbyists to legislators, but state Sen. John Schickel, R-Union, filed a federal lawsuit in September claiming that he has a constitutional (First Amendment) right to receive them. (The laws were passed after the FBI found several Kentucky politicians selling their votes.) And in May, officials of the American Gaming (gambling) Association and the Association of Club Executives complained to the Pentagon that a threatened prohibition of the use of government credit cards at casinos and strip clubs violated card users’ constitutional rights, in that protected activities (such as business strategy meetings) take place at those venues.

Can’t Possibly Be True

Inexplicable

Counseling: • Individual • Premarital • Marriage/Family • Anxiety, Stress

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The Job of the Researcher

Scientists have somehow determined that rats dream about where they want to go in the future. Dr. Hugo Spiers of University College London (and colleagues) inferred as much in a recent eLife article based on how neurons in the rodent brain’s hippocampus fire up in certain patterns. They discovered similar patterns when a rat is asleep just before conquering a food “maze” as when he awakens and actually gets to the food (as if it plotted by dream). (Buried Lede: Rats have dreams.)

Latest Religious Messages

The Power of Prayer: 1. Two men with handguns walked through an open door of a Philadelphia home in July and demanded drugs and cash from the three women inside, threatening pistol-whippings. According to a Philly.com report, a 55-year-old woman in the home immediately burst into loud prayer, causing the gunmen to flee empty-handed. 2. Police in Bellevue, Ohio, initially believed that texting behind the wheel was what caused Marilyn Perry, 62, to crash and badly injure another driver.

However, in July, she and her lawyer convinced a judge that she was “looking down” as she drove only because she was praying over “personal problems.”

Perspective

A year-long investigation by GlobalPost revealed in September that at least five U.S. or European Catholic priests disciplined for sex abuse have surfaced in South America, ministering unstigmatized in impoverished parishes. In Paraguay, Ecuador and Peru (all with softer law enforcement and media scrutiny than in the U.S., and where priests enjoy greater respect), dioceses have accepted notorious priests from Scranton, Pa; Minneapolis and Jackson, Miss; and Catholic facilities in Brazil and Colombia now employ shamed sex-abusers from Belgium and San Antonio, Texas. (The Belgian priest had been allowed to start an orphanage for street kids.)

GlobalPost claims the Vatican declined “repeated” phone calls for comment.

People With Issues

1. Miami-Dade (Florida) police arrested Eddy Juan, 52, two weeks after someone matching his description was reported at a library at Florida International University, crawling under tables and sniffing women’s feet. He was charged with violating a previous sex-offender registration order, reports the Broward and Palm Beach, Fla., Sun-Sentinel. 2. In what was originally a domestic disturbance case, Britain’s Cambridge Magistrates’ Court handed Nelson Nazare, 45, a six-week suspended sentence in September—for the photo on his seized cellphone of a man having sex with a large fish (plus two woman-dog sex photos). http://www.sun-sentinel.com/local/ct-florida-library-foot-sniffer-20150915-story.html Thanks This Week to Pete Randall and Alex Boese, and to the News of the Weird Board of Editorial Advisors. Read more weird news at WeirdUniverse.net; send items to WeirdNews@earthlink.net or P.O. Box 18737, Tampa, FL 33679.

OCTOBER 21, 2015 | 7

Christopher Hiscock, 33, got only a year’s probation after his guilty plea for trespassing on a ranch in Kamloops, British Columbia, in September—because it was a trespass with panache. Since no one had been home, Hiscock fed the cats, prepared a meal, shaved and showered, took meat out of the freezer to thaw, made some coffee, started a fire in the fireplace, did some laundry, put out hay for the horses, and even wrote some touchingly personal notes in the resident’s diary (“Today was my first full day at the ranch.” “I have to remind myself to just relax and take my time.”) In court, he apologized. “I made a lot of mistakes.” “Beautiful ranch. Gorgeous. I was driving [by] and I just turned in. Beautiful place.”

MA/LPC

Licensed Professional Counselor • Medical Hypnotherapist

| PLANET JACKSON HOLE |

Florida Justice: Orville “Lee” Wollard, now 60, was convicted of aggravated assault in 2008 after he fired one “warning shot” into a wall of his home during an argument with his daughter’s boyfriend. Believing his shot defused a dangerous situation (the boyfriend had once angrily ripped sutures from Wollard’s stomach), Wollard had declined a plea offer of probation and gone to trial, where he lost and faced a law written with a 20-year minimum sentence. Florida has since amended the law to give judges discretion about the crime and the sentence, but Gov. Rick Scott and the state’s clemency board have refused to help Wollard, who must serve 13 more years for a crime he perhaps would not even be charged with today.

Elizabeth Kingwill,

SARGENT SCHUTT

8 | OCTOBER 21, 2015

| PLANET JACKSON HOLE |

THE

Doctor Out IS

Digging into the activist, altruist roots of adventurer Doc Hayse.

BY JAKE NICHOLS

B

out. Something about a dorm room fire. Hayse spent the next year or two bumming around the West, taking “some crazy part-time jobs” now and then. He worked for the Forest Service and spent a winter in British Columbia in a geodesic dome that leaked so badly it was a battle of wills to get a fire going.

He especially remembers an insane stint at the Army Post Office in San Francisco at the height of the Vietnam War. But Hayse couldn’t let his intellect go to waste. He eventually returned to college in Madison, Wisc., studying molecular biology and chemistry. Forces were hazing him toward medicine but Hayse was resistant. “I hated med students, sitting there in the front row and raising their hands all the time to be noticed. And medicine seemed like a very unpleasant profession to me.

I couldn’t handle being stuck in a lab in a city somewhere for the rest of my life,” he said.

But school administrators insisted Hayse was a perfect candidate for medicine even if medicine wasn’t so suited to him. Once again, Hayse confounded school leaders.

“The assistant dean asked what kind of scores I got on the MCATs? I said I didn’t know what those were. He was appalled. He couldn’t believe I hadn’t taken them,” Hayse said with a chuckle.

Hayse was assistant teaching a class in field ecology at the time and not really focused on the material covered in the standard medical test but he took it anyway, without studying. “I figured I would just take them and wouldn’t do that well and I could forget about this idea of going to med school,” he said.

Hayse scored in the 97th percentile.

He was urged to pursue Yale or Harvard but that might mean a “career” of subspecialized study when all Hayse wanted to do was help people get well.

He graduated from the University of Oregon medical school. He spent the following year with a hospital in El Paso, Texas, to satisfy a commitment with the National HealthCare Corporation that partially funded his schooling.

In exchange, he had to give a year of service in a medically-underserved area. It suited Hayse to a “T.” Serving the underprivileged is what he is still known for today in Jackson. He’s happily seen many a patient with little or no ability to pay.

“I got into the real nitty gritty of it down there on the border,” Hayse said.

“I was seeing all kinds of interesting stuff that I couldn’t see otherwise.

People without medical care, and diseases that I would have never seen. I really did love that.”

Hayse eventually opened a few clinics in rural southeast Idaho but fled to Jackson Hole in the 1980s when faced with the “horrifying prospect” of putting his kids into the Idaho educational system. He took over Dr. William Hurst’s practice in Jackson in 1983.

The wrench in the works

Before long, Hayse had trekked every inch of Jackson Hole’s wilderness. He skied it, hiked it, boated it. Meanwhile, his passion for preserving wild lands for future generations (and his own) took hold in a new way when he helped launch the radical environmental advocacy group Earth First! in 1979.

Stirred by a counterculture of protest movements that symbolized the 60s and 70s in America, fraternal fascicles

OCTOBER 21, 2015 | 9

But given the option of the well-worn path or the one less traveled, Hayse has always passed up both in exchange for a seedy game trail or none at all. He likes it wild.

“When I was a kid I lived to go out in the mountains, out in the wild,” Hayse said. “Your parents let you go.

I was 12 or 13, and my friends and I would go on camping trips with our old WWII rucksacks and those old flannel sleeping bags. Our parents didn’t know where we were.”

Hayse admits he often didn’t know where he was, either. It didn’t matter.

He always found his way home.

He remembers the era with fondness – a time when parents allowed their kids to find their own way, to challenge themselves. The freedom he felt in that time and place is what Hayse found.

He’s never let go of it.

“I remember in high school, they had ‘career day.’ You were asked what you wanted to be when you grew up. What vocation you might be suited to,” Hayse recalled. “Well, every summer when I was up in the mountains, I would run across these hobos riding the Union Pacific. They would be sitting there eating their sandwiches and drinking beer and riding through the mountains in the open air. I thought, ‘Geez, that looks great. What a life. Total freedom.’

So I wrote down that I wanted to be a hobo.”

It didn’t go over well. He was summoned to the principal’s office.

They called him a bad example for the student body. With his grades and intellect he could be a CPA, the principal told him. Hayse couldn’t imagine anything worse. But off to college he dutifully went. Medicine didn’t interest him then, and certainly not adding up numbers in a spreadsheet.

College lasted a year. He got kicked

| PLANET JACKSON HOLE |

ruce Hayse was deep in the rain forest of the Central African Republic when he contracted malaria. For the third time. He wasn’t exactly sure where he was. He had no GPS. They weren’t on the market yet. A crude Russian map of the area told him he was more than 8,000 miles from home. He knew the mosquitoborn disease would slow him down for a while and, as a physician, he also knew it would pretty much have to run its course. He would have to live with it.

Hayse, all 6’2” of him, is the kind of guy who is patient with and tolerant of his environment — an environment he has risked his life for more than once.

“Everyone should have to get malaria sometime in their life,” Hayse said. “It can teach you compassion for those Africans who are, millions of them, shivering in these oppressive huts every day,” he told The New York Times after returning from the world’s secondlargest continent.

But malaria wasn’t what bugged Hayse on that trip. Not the tsetse fly, the crocodiles, poisonous snakes or grumpy hippos. Hayse was put off, rather, by the lack of wildlife that should have been flourishing in the lush habitat. But that’s getting ahead of his story.

Hayse was born in 1949. His backyard was the Steens Mountains surrounding Burns, Ore., where he grew up. In the 1950s and 60s, the eastern Oregon high country was still relatively pristine and free from intrusive development. Yet Hayse is the first to admit he was born too late. Probably 1849 would have suited him better. Or even 49 – AD or BC. Maybe it’s an allergy to concrete (he should run some tests on himself).

| PLANET JACKSON HOLE |

10 | OCTOBER 21, 2015

The world and everything else in it

Before it’s all gone, Hayse says, he wanted to see wilder and wilder places.

The mountains of Jackson Hole, the deserts of Oregon and Utah suited him for a while, but progress was closing in.

Beginning in the 1980s, Hayse began excursions to Africa. “I was really intrigued by some of the wildest places left in the world. Places where nobody

Edward Abbey inspired the advocacy group to adopt radical measures when political avenues were shut down.

BRUCE HAYSE

BRUCE HAYSE

like Earth First! were a short fuse in search of a match. Ignition was provided by Edward Abbey’s “The Monkey Wrench Gang.”

Hayse just laughs when asked if he is really the inspiration behind one of the characters in Abbey’s seminal 1975 novel. But he was there from the beginning of the movement with guys like Dave Foreman, Mike Roselle and Abbey himself. One of the group’s first meetings was in Jackson Hole.

“We had a rally up Granite Creek where they were trying to put oil and gas wells in,” Hayse remembers. “Ed Abbey was here. And Mike Roselle, a good friend of mine at the time, was living in Jackson. Mike was a great big guy and kind of rough looking.

He was the quintessential redneck: a southern Appalachian hillbilly, high school dropout. He sort of destroyed this meeting we had with oil company officials in Jackson. He got up on a table and started pounding it. ‘We got hunters. We got fishers. We don’t need no fucking oil wells!’ he shouted.”

Energy extraction companies backed off on plans to drill in Granite and Cache creeks. Dick Cheney and others later helped pass a bill that would protect millions of acres establishing the Gros Ventre Wilderness. But there were other battles to fight.

Earth First! conducted sit-ins, tree sits, and established roadblocks by chaining themselves together in order to halt logging in Cove-Mallard, Idaho.

Their revolutionary tactics succeeded in shutting down timber harvesters in Idaho’s Nez Perce National Forest by the new millennium. It was one of a string of surprising victories for a loosely knit group intent on defending mother earth with a mix of neo-conservation biology and hippy angst.

“It was all in reaction to a big Forest Service study [RARE II – the Forest

Service’s Roadless Area Review and Evaluation] in the 1970s. They came out with this horrible plan. Basically, it gave up most all the remaining wild country in the western U.S., everything that hadn’t been formally protected already, which was a lot, and all the big national conservation organizations caved in to it,” Hayse said. “Logging was a really big deal then. People like Forman, Bart Koehler, Howie Wolke, and a number of guys here in Jackson; they just couldn’t go along with what these national groups were agreeing to. But nobody knew what to do. Nobody knew how to go about it. Obviously you couldn’t attack it at the legislative level. You didn’t have any power or anything. So we started out by doing ‘direct action’ types of things.”

Earth First! served its purpose and finally crumbled when the FBI, tiring of the nuisance, infiltrated the group with an agent provocateur who succeeded in convincing a few rogue members to blow up a power plant. Foreman was arrested on sabotage charges in May 1989. The first call he made in jail was to Hayse.

“Dave called me that day and I called Gerry Spence,” Hayse said. “Gerry was just appalled to hear what happened. He said, ‘Yeah, I’ll take the case and I’ll do it for free.’”

The case against Earth First! was eventually settled but a resulting restraining order on Foreman and a growing realization that EF was now on the fed’s radar convinced most members to lower their profiles.

As Earth First! was finding its way, Hayse opened the popular Moab bookstore Back of Beyond Books.

He also wrote a guidebook on Oregon.

went.” symptoms and offered a cure.

Hayse met with the country’s He talked with leading ecologist and conservationist Mike Fay who president. He signed a contract that suggested Africa. Fay was planning his more or less made Hayse a defacto 455-day, 3,200-mile walk across the despot over a third of the country – continent [MegaTransect] and a later 60,000 square miles of threatening MegaFlyover – 70,000 miles of bush and threatened “Heart of Darkness” pilot photography – in conjunction wilderness that President Ange-Felix Patasse just as soon wanted to forget with National Geographic.

“We asked Fay, ‘What’s the wildest about. Hayse, with the help of fellow river in Africa?’ He said, ‘The Chinko. Jackson physician Christian Guier, Nobody’s ever mapped it. Nobody even founded and funded the African knows what’s in there,’” Hayse recalled. Rainforest and Rivers Conservation “Well, we found it on a map of the Central (ARRC) with the idea he could help African Republic (CAR). We went there stop the needless decimation of Africa’s wildlife before it was and asked around. too late. The result Nobody had any idea We hired a essentially a about it. People that South African was paramilitary of 400 lived around there all their lives, that should ex-commando. men armed with rifles. Their have known about it, Basically he assault orders were to catch just said they thought there were lots of wanted to kill poachers and shoot them. It was Earth villages up there but no people who First! times 10. It was a one they knew dared go in there. Everybody were killing small army.

“We hired a South over there was scared animals now.

African ex-commando to go down the Chinko that had been doing because these Arab poaching gangs from Sudan had been some solo anti-poaching work. Actually, butchering wildlife and people for years.” he had become disillusioned with militia Add ruthless poachers in a lawless work and basically wanted to only kill nation to the list of deterrents that had people who were killing animals now,” kept most world travelers from ever Hayse said. “And he was very good at it.”

But things started unraveling for setting foot in the dark jungles of the Chinko River Basin. Perfect, thought Hayse. “We got in over our heads. We were out of our league,” he admitted.

Hayse, sounds like my kind of river.

“We floated 300 miles down this river “First, we got hit from all sides back and didn’t see a soul. There weren’t any in the states. I was on NPR one day villages. It was spooky, though, because and couldn’t believe all the vitriolic there weren’t any animals, either. blowback. We were vilified as these This was ideal wildlife habitat but nasty Americans who think they can these poachers were just slaughtering run the world. We got attacked by the everything in there. The river was once right wing. Rush Limbaugh talked about known as the River of Elephants. We me and what a bad guy I was and how we environmentalists value animals hardly saw any. It was really tragic.”

At the end of the Chinko was a village more than people. On the other side, of pygmies. They had never seen a white we had all the left-wingers saying what man. They were convinced Hayse and a horrible bunch of racist Americans we his crew were there to save them from were going over there and murdering the brutality they had suffered at the these poor local tribe people. Even the hands of Sudanese poachers. Like a major conservation groups distanced good doctor, Hayse listened to their themselves from us because we were

“

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pretty up front about saying antipoaching requires a certain level of violence and small warfare. We were attacked by everybody.”

When General François Bozizé assumed control over the CAR and infighting in that country erupted in another civil war, it was time to walk away, Hayse admitted.

A follow-up expedition in 1998 to Gabon was next on the conservationist’s bucket list. Hayse and a small band from Jackson Hole set out to be the first people ever to float the Ivindo River through the lush Mingouli Forest. Hayse and company documented incredible waterfalls and abundant wildlife.

Upon learning the area was under constant threat of clear-cutting, Hayse and members of ARRC managed to convince President Ali Bongo to preserve the region as a permanent park and monument under Gabonese control.

In 2002, Hayse was off to the Congo to navigate the largely unexplored Lindi River in Maiko National Park. The park was established in 1970 but funding had all but dried up, leaving the condition of the isolated and biodiverse region a complete unknown.

Shortly before the journey, Hayse was contacted by the president of the Democratic Republic of Congo who at first forbade him to go but then relented only on the condition he take along native “soldiers” to protect him and guide him down the river.

“None of these guys had actually been in there. It was an unknown area to them. They were terrified for us to go in there,” Hayse said. “They were going to be of no use whatsoever. Plus, they were all engaged in fighting with each other. That got very tricky. So we just agreed with the president and then paid these guys off and told them to get lost.”

Two weeks into the trek Hayse and his company were captured by rebel Congolese. They were not happy with the intrusion and took a keen dislike to one of the group leaders, a local named Faustan Mesasu. Mesasu was known to the Mai-Mai guerillas as a “most hated man.”

“They wanted to kill him and throw his head in the river.

They were insistent on that,” Hayse said. “We didn’t actually like him, either, and probably wouldn’t have minded if they did. But we are the ones who took him back there so we felt we had to stick up for him. We haggled with them for about a day, and they really were going to kill us all if we

weren’t going to hand over the away with all the bad stuff that happens when you are thinking only of yourself.

Congolese guy to them.”

A payoff and a threat broke the Things like insecurity, which leads to tension. Hayse told his captors through greed and power then pushing other people around. But Guier, who spoke you get up in the French, that he So many wilderness and you would have to call the people like suddenly realize there United States via his is really no pressure on satellite phone to tell to use the you. You don’t have to them whether he was outdoors be anything. You are alright or not. just part of nature and “We told them as a way to that’s enough.” we had to check in demonstrate The peace and daily or else the U.S. tranquility aren’t for would send in the their own everybody, though. military to our last abilities for The spirituality known location,” ego s sake. aspect is too “hippy” Hayse lied. “That and for some. Today’s $500 seemed to make a favorable impression. They let us go weekend warriors arm themselves with at that point. They didn’t want to get gear, global positioning and Gortex in what amounts to more of a battle with bombed.” nature than a coexistence. Hayse likes where conservation is headed today and Calm, cool and appreciates that many in the Jackson connected Hole area live here to be “out there.”

Hayse has mellowed only marginally But he worries some groups, like at 66 years old. He still puts in a full high-octane athletes who put the “X” day at the office with time for the in extreme, just don’t get it. great outdoors when he can make it.

“I’ve seen this shift away from a real Preserving the earth’s last wild places is interest in protecting wild country, and still his passion but he’s now realizing that’s kind of sad,” Hayse says. “So it might be better (or at least safer) many people like to use the outdoors as changing people from the inside out. their personal gymnasium, or as a way “I’ve been conservation-minded all to demonstrate their own abilities for my life from when I was young,” Hayse ego’s sake. Wilderness is a great place said. “I don’t feel like I’ve lost any of to commune with and appreciate the that feeling at all. I don’t wake up in the outdoors for the natural wonder it is. morning feeling that I’m too old or too You don’t have to fight against it for your tired or don’t dare to do ‘that’ anymore. own personal gratification all the time.

“It’s a real spiritual thing – to get out It’s not how many peaks you’ve climbed there and feel totally a part of nature. No or pitting yourself against nature. It’s separation from it at all. I think people about the happiness, freedom and living in society today become more spiritual fulfillment of being connected and more focused on themselves as to the land. For me, anyway.” PJH individuals. They get carried

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OCTOBER 21, 2015 | 11

SARGENT SCHUTT

| PLANET JACKSON HOLE |

Hayse served on the boards of the Jackson Hole Conservation Alliance, Western Wetlands Project, and Wyoming Wilderness Association.

He serves on the board of trustees for St. John’s Medical Center. He was named ‘Citizen of the Year’ in 1992 by the Jackson Hole Chamber of Commerce.

| PLANET JACKSON HOLE |

12 | OCTOBER 21, 2015

CREATIVE PEAKS Demo Delights Dancers’ Workshop offers free classes for the week.

BY KELSEY DAYTON

D

ance has long been part of Brandie Orchard’s life.

She moved to Jackson in 1995 to teach at Dancers’ Workshop after growing up in a studio. When she left Dancers’ Workshop, it could have been the end of her dancing days, but Dancers’ Workshop’s assortment of adult classes has allowed her to take Zumba and salsa, as well as fitness classes like pilates.

For Orchard, Dancers’ Workshop offered a place for her to keep dancing. But it also can be a place to start dancing.

You don’t need a dance background like Orchard’s to get moving at Dancers’ Workshop. The slate of adult classes are welcoming for all abilities and interests – from hip-hop dance to fitness classes like Booty Barre, said Katie Jackson, marketing coordinator with Dancers’ Workshop.

And the best way to check out these is during the free demo week held each fall. Starting Monday all of the drop-in classes at Dancers’ Workshop are free of charge.

It’s a great chance to see what classes are right for you, Jackson said.

Demo week has become so popular people are encouraged to sign up for slots online at DWJH.org to reserve spots.

Pilates, Booty Barre and MELT classes are especially popular, she said.

The dance classes offer more than just fitness. Dance also builds confidence, Jackson said. It challenges your mind and builds body awareness and discipline. And, like other forms of exercise, it increases endorphins and leaves you feeling good when you are done, Jackson said.

It’s also a great social outlet. “Dance has always been something that has brought communities together,” she said.

Orchard, who is also on Dancers’ Workshop’s board, plans to hit up as many classes during demo week as she can.

Get moving with free Dancers’ Workshop classes during its annual demo week.

“Why not?” she said. “They’re free.” PJH

Dancers’ Workshop’s annual demo week, various times Monday through Saturday, free. For a complete schedule visit DWJH.org.

Art Converges Three collaborate to open shared performance space.

BY KELSEY DAYTON

J

ackson has an unusual problem for a small town. It has so much art, venues are bursting at the seams and smaller theater, music and dance groups aren’t able to secure space to rehearse and perform.

That’s why Riot Act, Inc.’s Macey Mott is partnering with musicians Jason Fritts and Mike Covell to create Convergence, a new performing arts venue. The trio is working to raise $50,000 through crowdfunding on the site Indiegogo.

The space will join the vacant Ryan Cleaners and Covell and Fritts’ studio at 545 N. Cache near the Rustic Inn. Convergence will be a rehearsal, performance and event space that is affordable and flexible, Mott said. Riot Act, Inc., will become a nonprofit resident at Convergence. Other artists and groups will be able to rent the space for classes, rehearsals and performances. People will also be able to use the site for weddings, concerts and fundraisers.

“We want to cater to the community,” Mott said.

The community aspect is also why they decided to fundraise for the new space. Since it is meant to be a community space, the community should be involved in creating it, Mott said.

The money they raise from Indiegogo will help cover start-up costs including the remodeling along with adding bathrooms and climate control systems. Eventually they also want to add soundproofing and retractable walls to divvy the space up into multiple rooms when needed.

The three artists are working with a local architect to navigate town and county building codes and have submitted applications to change the use for the space. If approved, they will then work to remodel the space to bring it up to code in hopes of opening it early next year.

Macey Mott, Jason Fritts and Mike Covell are the minds behind Jackson’s freshest new creative space.

Once open, Convergence will charge people hourly rates for rehearsal spaces and events and performances. It also will host Convergence-sponsored events like concerts and dances. According to the fundraising page, Mott, Fritts and Covell hope Convergence will be profitable within three years of opening. PJH

THIS WEEK: October 21-27, 2015

WEDNESDAY 10.21

n Game Night 4:30pm, Snake River Brewery, Free. 307-739-2337 n Basics of Pressure Canning 5:30pm, 4-H Building, $20.00.

307-733-3087 n Microsoft Excel Basics 6:00pm, CWC-Jackson, $40.00.

307-733-7425 n First in Family College Bound 6:00pm, JH High School, Free.

307-733-2164 n Senior Oktoberfest 6:00pm, Senior Center of Jackson Hole, 307-733-7300 n Art + Soul: Creative Expression 6:00pm, Multi-Purpose Studio, $100.00 - $120.00. 307-7336379 n Young Adult Book Club 6:00pm, Valley of the Tetons Library, Free. 208-787-2201 n Evening Yoga 6:00pm, Teton Recreation Center, $8.00 - $82.50. 307739-9025 n Chef’s Tasting at The Rose 6:00pm, The Rose, 307-7331500 nGIA Wellness and Hole Food Rescue host Author Dr. Sherrill Sellman 6:00pm, Old Wilson School, $10.00 - $15.00. 307-732-0540 n Donation Dry Needling Clinic 6:30pm, Medicine Wheel Wellness, Free. 307-699-7480 n Open Gym - Adult Basketball 6:30pm, Teton Recreation Center, $3.75. 307-739-9025 n Salsa at Dancers’ Workshop 7:00pm, Dancers’ Workshop, $12.00 - $16.00. 307-733-6398 n Oneness Deeksha Meditation 7:30pm, Akasha Yoga, $5.00.

307-413-3965 n Songwriter’s Alley Open Mic 8:00pm, Silver Dollar Showroom, Free. 307-732-3939 n Vinyl Night 9:00pm, The Rose, Free. 307733-1500

THURSDAY 10.22

SATURDAY & SUNDAY BRUNCH

Compiled by Caroline Zieleniewski

10:30am - 3:00pm Bottomless Mimosas & Bloody Marys $15

HAPPY HOUR

1/2 Off Drinks Daily 5-7pm

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Monday-Saturday 11am, Sunday 10:30am 832 W. Broadway (inside Plaza Liquors)•733-7901

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OCTOBER 21, 2015 | 13

n Kettlebells 7:00am, Teton Recreation Center, $8.00 - $82.50. 307739-9025 n Zumba at Dancers’ Workshop 8:30am, Dancers’ Workshop, Free. 307-733-6398 n Grand Teton National Park

Weekly Trails Volunteer Day 9:00am, Grand Teton National Park, Free. 307-739-3379 n Water Fitness 9:00am, Teton Recreation Center, $8.00 - $82.50. 307739-9025 n Yoga 9:00am, Teton Recreation Center, $8.00 - $82.50. 307739-9025 n Intermediate/Advanced Ballet @ Dancers’ Workshop 9:30am, Dancers’ Workshop, $12.00 - $16.00. 307-733-6398 n Tech Tutor 10:00am, Teton County Library, Free. 307-733-2164 ext. 218 n Kindercreations 10:00am, Borshell Children’s Studio, $15.00 - $80.00. 30773-6379 n Senior Resources Open House 10:00am, Teton County Library Ordway Auditorium, Free. 307733-2164 n Toddler Time 10:05am, Teton County Library Youth Auditorium, Free. 307733-2164 x 118 n Storytime 10:30am, Teton County Library Youth Auditorium, Free. 307733-2164 n Voice for Public Speakers and Actors 10:30am, Off Square, $225.00.

307-733-3021 n Storytime 11:00am, Teton County Library Youth Auditorium, Free. 307733-2164 n Crystal Sound Bowl Experience with Daniela Botur 12:00pm, Intencions, Free. 307733-9290 n Open Gym - Adult Basketball 12:00pm, Teton Recreation Center, $3.75. 307-739-9025 n Public Skating 12:00pm, Snow King Sports & Events Center, $6.00 - $8.00.

307-201-1633 n Acting for the Home Schooled Student 1:00pm, Off Square, $225.00.

307-733-3021 n bootybarre® at Dancers’ Workshop 1:30pm, Dancers’ Workshop, $12.00 - $16.00. 307-733-6398 n Superheroes! Grades 4th-5th 3:30pm, Off Square, $200.00.

307-733-3021 n InDesign: Brochure, Flyer

| PLANET JACKSON HOLE |

n Ski Fitness with Whitney Wright 7:00am, Dancers’ Workshop, $225.00. 307-733-6398 n Boot Camp 7:00am, Teton Recreation Center, $8.00 - $82.50. 307739-9025 n Pilates Mat Classes at Dancers’ Workshop 8:30am, Dancers’ Workshop, $12.00 - $16.00. 307-733-6398 n Toddler Gym 8:30am, Teton Recreation Center, $0.00 - $2.50. 307-739-9025 n Water Fitness 9:00am, Teton Recreation Center, $8.00 - $82.50. 307739-9025 n Yoga 9:00am, Teton Recreation Center, $8.00 - $82.50. 307739-9025 n Zumba at Dancers’ Workshop 9:30am, Dancers’ Workshop, $12.00 - $16.00. 307-733-6398 n Tech Tutor 10:00am, Teton County Library, Free. 307-733-2164 ext. 218 n Playreading 10:00am, Off Square, $225.00.

307-733-3021 n Toddler Gym 10:00am, Teton Recreation Center, $0.00 - $2.50. 307-739-9025 n Fables, Feathers, and Fur 10:30am, National Museum of Wildlife Art, Free. 307-733-5771 n Public Skating 12:00pm, Snow King Sports & Events Center, $6.00 - $8.00.

307-201-1633 n Total Fitness 12:10pm, Teton Recreation Center, $8.00 - $82.50. 307739-9025 n Chess Club for Grades K-12 3:30pm, Teton County Library Youth Auditorium, Free. 307733-2164 ext. 118 n Cubism + Surrealism 3:30pm, Drawing, Painting + Printmaking Studio, $45.00 $55.00. 307-733-6379 n Real Characters, Grades 3rd-5th 3:30pm, Off Square, $200.00.

307-733-3021 n Semi-Private Painting + Drawing 4:00pm, Borshell Children’s Studio, $20.00 - $130.00. 307733-6379 n Junior Players, Grades 6th-8th 4:30pm, Off Square, $225.00.

307-733-3021

| PLANET JACKSON HOLE |

14 | OCTOBER 21, 2015

MUSIC BOX

Brotherly Rock Salt Lake City folk-rock quintet returns to the Silver Dollar Showroom.

BY AARON DAVIS @ScreenDoorPorch

A

kin to Bob Dylan going electric, the subtle emotion of a lone folk singer-songwriter being acclimated to four additional individuals weaves a more complex fabric.

The making of a band, in this case, scraped the solo moniker Henry Wade in favor of The June Brothers—hinting at a more family vibe of conspirators and composers. While this Salt Lake City quintet is not related by blood, the recent several months has found the band further from home, touring with intent and becoming a version of family that touring bands become.

“When I started, I was on my own. The songs were produced and the album was done,” said vocalist, songwriter, and acoustic guitarist Spencer Oberle, referring to his debut album under the name Henry Wade. “The guys I found are great songwriters as well, and we started crafting songs together. We wanted the new band name to reflect the collaborative piece that it is now and I think it fits the sentiment of what we’re going for without being pigeonholed.

The June Brothers (left), play the Silver Dollar this weekend; Cure for the Common takes the Tavern’s stage Saturday.

“Currently, we all have day jobs but have been traveling a fair amount over last four to five months. I’m a general contractor but trying to phase that out. The more we travel, the harder it is to go to a day job. We’d really like to hit it full steam.”

The 2014 release “Meet Your Creature” was produced and engineered by Joshua James, a Utah songwriter and member of American Fork that had a solo album hit No. 1 on the iTunes Folk Album list in 2007. The neo-folk production of “Meet Your Creature” certainly has James’s stamp, and the members of American Fork backed Oberle on the project.

The album went on to receive an honorable mention for Local Album of the Year from City Weekly, which described it as “warm and woodsy folksy Americana tunes” with “smoky and resonant vocals.”

“The live shows are more rock-based. We amp everything up and take what’s on the album to an extreme,” Oberle said.

“I’m more into a southern rock sound, which wasn’t captured as much on the album.”

Oberle notes Marshall Tucker Band, The Allman Brothers, Wilco and Ryan Adams as influences, but his most important tool for songwriting is harmony — both vocally and instrumentally. Lyrically, it’s all about what’s in his peripheral.

“Whether it’s girls or friends, relationships definitely build a platform for creating thinking and writing,” Oberle explained. “My mom was a professional painter and I love that form of art. That different medium helped develop an artistic eye, and she’s helped me grasp that as well.”

The June Brothers, 7:30 to 11 p.m., Friday and Saturday at the Silver Dollar Showroom. Free. 732-3939.

Montana jamband has the Cure

For those who reveled in the first late night run of shows or the Saturday main stage at Contour Music Festival in June, you likely caught the hard-hitting electro thunder funk of Bozeman’s Cure for the Common. The sextet is fueled by dance-funk, synth-rock and anchored by top-notch musicianship atop contemporary jamband-styled vocals. Epic arrangements are boosted by a home-cultivated light show that coaxes concertgoers into their psychedelic Montana spaceship. With the 2015 release of “The Squeeze” and a summer of festival stages, including Wakarusa, comes a wave of self-confidence.

“You’re sick of filtering through the fluff, disenchanted with half-assed live experiences, and overwhelmed by bland, homogenized new talent,” the band’s bio reads. “We are your Cure For The Common, and we invite you to strap on your helmet, and come aboard.”

If you’re putting it out there like that, living up to the name Cure for the Common is imperative. The amount of touring these fellas have embraced is likely a cue that you’ll be walking into a tightly-weaved affair, ideal for cutting loose and surrendering to the groove. PJH Cure for the Common, 10 p.m., Saturday at Town Square Tavern. $5. 733-3886.

For complete event details visit pjhcalendar.com.

RABBIT ROW REPAIR WE SERVICE THEM ALL …

​ th Annual Halloween Concert 6 ​Saturday, 3pm at Walk Festival Hall in Teton Village ​ ear your costume. Children will be invited on stage for a costume parade.​​ W Immediately following​the concert​, children are invited to trick-or-treat at participating businesses in Teton Village​. n Open Gym - Adult Soccer 6:30pm, Teton Recreation Center, $3.75. 307-739-0925 n A Book Discussion of Odd Girl Out 6:30pm, Teton County Library Ordway Auditorium, Free. n Spanish for Businesses 7:00pm, CWC-Jackson, $100.00. 307-733-7425 n After a Suicide 7:00pm, Jackson Hole Middle School Commons, Free. 307739-7493 n B. Rad & The Moustache Militia 7:30pm, Silver Dollar Showroom in the Wort Hotel, Free. 307733-2190 n Karaoke 9:00pm, Virginian Saloon, Free.

307-739-9891 n Salsa Night 9:00pm, The Rose, Free. 307733-1500

FRIDAY 10.23

4 2 8 0 W. L E E P E R • W I L S O N • 3 0 7 - 7 3 3 - 4 3 3 1

ADVERTISING INQUIRIES: SALES@JHSNOWBOARDER.COM

OCTOBER 21, 2015 | 15

n Boot Camp 7:00am, Teton Recreation Center, $8.00 - $82.50. 307739-9025 n Toddler Gym 8:30am, Teton Recreation Center, $0.00 - $2.50. 307-739-9025 n bootybarre® at Dancers’ Workshop 9:00am, Dancers’ Workshop, $12.00 - $16.00. 307-733-6398 n Water Fitness 9:00am, Teton Recreation Center, $8.00 - $82.50. 307739-9025 n Yoga 9:00am, Teton Recreation Center, $8.00 - $82.50. 307739-9025 n Ballet Workout at Dancers’ Workshop 9:30am, Dancers’ Workshop, $12.00 - $16.00. 307-733-6398 n Fall Tours at Astoria Hot Springs 10:00am, Astoria Hot Springs,

Free. 307-739-3942 n Zumba at Dancers’ Workshop 10:00am, Dancers’ Workshop, $12.00 - $16.00. 307-733-6398 n Toddler Gym 10:00am, Teton Recreation Center, $0.00 - $2.50. 307-739-9025 n Water Fitness 12:00pm, Teton Recreation Center, $8.00 - $82.50. 307739-9025 n Yoga 12:00pm, Teton Recreation Center, $8.00 - $82.50. 307739-9025 n Public Skating 12:00pm, Snow King Sports & Events Center, $6.00 - $8.00.

307-201-1633 n Total Fitness 12:10pm, Teton Recreation Center, $8.00 - $82.50. 307739-9025 n Skyline Volunteer Days 3:00pm, Top of Ferrin’s Trail, Free. n Free Friday Wine Tasting 4:00pm, The Liquor Store, Free.

307-733-4466 n Em’s Attic Vintage Clothing Sale 5:00pm, 567 W. Broadway, Free. n Jackson Hole Kiwanis Annual Follies 6:00pm, Fair Building, $20.00. n Open Gym - Adult Soccer 6:30pm, Teton Recreation Center, $3.75. 307-739-0925 n Pam Drews Phillips Plays Jazz 7:00pm, The Granary at Spring Creek Ranch, Free. 307-7338833 n Dancing with the Jackson Hole Stars 7:00pm, Center Theater, $35.00 - $100.00. 307-733-1616 n June Brothers 7:30pm, Silver Dollar Showroom, Free. 307-732-3939 n Stargazing at Rendezvous Park

| PLANET JACKSON HOLE |

and Book Layout 4:00pm, Photography Studio, $120.00 - $145.00. 307-7336379 n Yoga 4:15pm, Teton Recreation Center, $8.00 - $82.50. 307739-9025 n Em’s Attic Vintage Clothing Sale 5:00pm, 567 W. Broadway, Free. n Jazzercise 5:30pm, Teton Recreation Center, $8.00 - $82.50. 307739-9025 n Total Fitness 5:30pm, Teton Recreation Center, $8.00 - $82.50. 307739-9025 n Photography Fundamentals 6:00pm, Center for the Arts, $120.00 - $145.00. 307-7336379 n Adobe Photoshop 6:00pm, CWC-Jackson, $200.00. 307-733-7425 n Shooting Video with a DSLR 6:00pm, Photography Studio, $120.00 - $145.00. 307-7336379 n Scholarship and Application Essay Help Night 6:00pm, Teton County Library Computer Lab, Free. 307-7332164 n L.E.A.D (Latino Employees Achieving Dreams) 6:00pm, Latino Resource Center, 307-734-0333 n Knit Nite 6:00pm, Knit on Pearl, Free. 307733-5648 n Elk Ivory + Stone Bezel Setting 6:00pm, Center for the Arts, $60.00. 307-733-6379 n Kirtan with Amanda Botur 6:00pm, Teton Yoga Shala, Free.

307-690-3054 n Modern Dance Class at Dancers’ Workshop 6:15pm, Dancers’ Workshop, $12.00 - $16.00. 307-733-6398

| PLANET JACKSON HOLE |

16 | OCTOBER 21, 2015

GET OUT

WRITERS WANTED UNTOLD STORIES EDGY TOPICS NEWS

RYAN BURKE

Email your resume or writing clips to editor@planetjh.com.

Highs and Lows The ebb and flow of personal growth in the mountains.

BY RYAN BURKE

A

s our eyes adjusted to the darkness, we parked the sailboat on the rocky shores of Jackson Lake and started the ascent to the Northeast Ridge of Mount Moran.

Wading through the thick forest at night, we were quickly humbled by our surroundings, feeling like uninvited guests who might be punished for our intrusion. Anxiety filled our veins as we set out into the unknown, imagining, rather unproductively, what large creatures might lay beyond the beam of our headlamps. We had found the dangerous edge where risk and reward meet, like a fork in the road we would either become a grizzly bear’s appetizer or make it through the gauntlet of wilderness unharmed. Convincing ourselves that uncertainty of success is what makes an adventure worth the trip, we continued, undeterred. Engrained into our minds was the mantra that the risk is worth the reward.

Eventually high on the steep ridgeline we stumbled upon a slanting slab of granite that would suffice as our bed for the night.

When we awoke the following morning our eyes were treated to an expansive view of the rising sun. Suddenly, we were filled with the

Lewis Smirl eyes the Northeast Ridge on Mt. Moran (top left); Smirl puts together the pieces of a 1950 plane crash on Mt. Moran (right), and the author walks the line between anxiety and excitement. same bodily sensations that had terrified us the night before, our heartbeats quickened and our vision became more clear. However, with the world fully exposed and no imaginary threats lurking in the shadows, we chose to label these emotions within us as excitement instead of anxiety. Our perceptions shifted as we realized that both anticipation and angst feel the same way in our bodies, but our mind’s interpretation of those sensory inputs determine if the experience is labeled as enjoyment or fear. Like riding a roller coaster, time in the outdoors is a state of heightened arousal that bounces between exhilaration and unease.

Scrambling over quality granite stone at 11,000 feet we stumbled upon the remnants of an old airplane engine from a 1950 plane crash. The carnage of the wreckage hopefully indicated a quick death for its inhabitants — 20 missionaries headed for South America.

Boarding the plane, the passengers must have known they were risking their lives, but their doubts were surely silenced by the purity of their motives. When they made the fateful decision to leave their homes they were facing the same dilemma all mountaineers do when approaching an obstacle: “do I continue on or go back to where it was safe?” This is an internal battle that everyone suffers with on a daily basis, as we struggle to walk a tightrope between opportunity and danger.

As the fog settled in around us and we approached the summit ridge, the temperature began to drop and the consequences became more severe. An old adage reports that growth begins at the end of your comfort

zone, but the thousand-foot drop to our right also convinced us that the edge of our ability is also where death occurs. One precarious move stood between us and the summit, as we decided whether it was worth possible injury to touch the highest point on a pile of rocks. In the mountains, the fleeting pleasure of success seems to taunt us on irrationally, while the potential pain of failure magnifies our disgrace and mocks us from the future. Rarely do we play it forward and think about the consequences if things do not go as planned — we block out the possibility that instead of ending up as a grandfather we could end up as a statistic. We forget that the line between “that was awesome” and “that was stupid” is razor thin and to progress forward sometimes it is necessary to step back.

As we descended to the safety of our sailboat, we pondered the question, how could we enjoy the reward without the risk?

Impossible, we concluded, as doubt is always a prerequisite for any true achievement.

Sometimes the risk is the reward. The willingness to step to the edge with open eyes is what makes personal evolution possible.

Only when you face your internal demons can you learn to trust your intuition and silence your impulsivity. Moments of doubt on the mountain help us practice pausing to gain clarity without becoming held prisoner by the paralysis of fear. The outdoors isn’t the only outlet for growth, but for me it is the most reliable testing ground to see when and where I will fight or flee, freeze or flow. PJH

For complete event details visit pjhcalendar.com.

PR

Please support keeping abortion safe and legal.

Choice Take away a woman’s right to choose and she’s left to take matters into her own hands.

IT’S PRO-CHOICE OR NO-CHOICE. Witches Tea Saturday, 5:30pm at the Jackson Hole Playhouse

Paid for by the KCR Coalition for Pro-Choice Kristyne Crane Rupert | www.naral.org.

Enjoy festive food and drinks as your hosts tell fortunes, ghost stories and celebrate the fun of Halloween.

8:00pm, Rendezvous Park (R-Park), Free. 307-413-4779 n Friday Night DJ 10:00pm, The Rose, Free. 307733-1500

SATURDAY 10.24

SUNDAY 10.25

MONDAY 10.26

n Ski Fitness with Whitney Wright 7:00am, Dancers’ Workshop, $225.00. 307-733-6398 n Boot Camp 7:00am, Teton Recreation Center, $8.00 - $82.50. 307739-9025 n Pilates Mat Classes at Dancers’ Workshop 8:30am, Dancers’ Workshop, Free. 307-733-6398 n Demo Week at Dancers’ Workshop 8:30am, Dancers’ Workshop Studios, Free. 307-733-6398 n Toddler Gym 8:30am, Teton Recreation Center, $0.00 - $2.50. 307-739-9025 n Jazzercise 9:00am, Teton Recreation Center, $8.00 - $82.50. 307739-9025 n Water Fitness 9:00am, Teton Recreation Center, $8.00 - $82.50. 307739-9025 n Zumba at Dancers’ Workshop 9:30am, Dancers’ Workshop, Free. 307-733-6398 n Toddler Gym 10:00am, Teton Recreation Center, $0.00 - $2.50. 307-739-9025 n Little Hands, Little Feet 10:30am, Borshell Children’s Studio, $15.00 - $80.00. 307733-6379 n Public Skating 12:00pm, Snow King Sports & Events Center, $6.00 - $8.00.

307-201-1633 n Total Fitness

OCTOBER 21, 2015 | 17

n Season Pass Sale & Pick Up 9:00am, Grand Targhee Resort, 800-TARGHEE n Intro to Silversmithing 9:30am, Center for the Arts, $120.00. 307-733-6379 n Winter Coat Drive for the Homeless 10:00am, Eddie Bauer Retail Store, Free. 307-733-3165 n NFL Package 11:00am, The Virginian Saloon, Free. 307-739-9891 n Football at The Wort 11:00am, Silver Dollar Showroom, 37-732-3939 n NFL Sunday Football at the Trap 11:00am, The Trap Bar & Grill, Free. 307-353-2300 n Open Gym - Adult Volleyball 4:00pm, Teton Recreation Center, $3.75. 307-739-9025 n Harvest Dinner 5:30pm, Rendezvous Bistro, $100.00. 307-733-9417 n Stagecoach Band

6:00pm, Stagecoach, Free. 307733-4407 n Taize 7:00pm, St. John’s Episcopal Church, Free. 307-733-2603

| PLANET JACKSON HOLE |

n Jackson Hole Ski & Snowboard Club Ski Swap 7:30am, Heritage Arena at the Rodeo Grounds, $1.00 - $10.00. n Zumba at Dancers’ Workshop 9:00am, Dancers’ Workshop, $12.00 - $16.00. 307-733-6398 n Barre Fusion at Dancers’ Workshop 9:30am, Dancers’ Workshop, $12.00 - $16.00. 307-733-6398 n Intro to Silversmithing 9:30am, Center for the Arts, $120.00. 307-733-6379 n Adult Oil Painting 10:00am, The Local Galleria, $25.00 - $80.00. 208-270-0883 n Em’s Attic Vintage Clothing Sale 10:00am, 567 W. Broadway, Free. n Day of the Dead Folk Art Craft 1:30pm, Teton County Library Ordway Auditorium, Free. 307733-2164 n Experience Live Raptors 2:00pm, Teton Raptor Center, $10.00 - $12.00. 307-203-2551 n Halloween Concert & Trick or Treat 3:00pm, Walk Festival Hall, Free.

307-733-5898 n Witches Tea 3:30pm & 5:30pm, Jackson Hole Playhouse, $20.00 - $65.00.

801-901-8080 n LGBT Monthly Social 6:00pm, Call for directions, Free. 307-690-7999 n TRASHO’WEEN 6:00pm, Driggs City/Senior

Center, $10.00. 208-354-2800 n Jackson Hole Kiwanis announces its annual Follies 6:00pm, Fair Building, $20.00. n Open Gym - Adult Soccer 6:30pm, Teton Recreation Center, $3.75. 307-739-0925 n Live Music 7:00pm, The Virginian Saloon, Free. 307-739-9891 n Dancing with the Jackson Hole Stars 7:00pm, Center Theater, $35.00 - $100.00. 307-733-1616 n June Brothers 7:30pm, Silver Dollar Showroom, Free. 307-732-3939 n Cure for the Common 10:30pm, Town Square Tavern, $5.00. 307-733-3886

| PLANET JACKSON HOLE |

18 | OCTOBER 21, 2015

12:10pm, Teton Recreation Center, $8.00 - $82.50. 307739-9025 n Story Time 1:00pm, Valley of the Tetons Library, Free. 208-787-2201 n After School Kidzart Club 3:30pm, Borshell Children’s Studio, $135.00 - $165.00. 307733-6379 n Hand + Wheel 4:00pm, Ceramics Studio, $125.00 - $150.00. 307-7336379 n InDesign: Brochure, Flyer and Book Layout 4:00pm, Photography Studio, $120.00 - $145.00. 307-7336379 n Open Range 4:30pm, Archery Range at the Recreation Center, $8.00 $82.50. 307-739-9025 n Old Bill’s Fun Run for Charities 2015 Awards Party 5:00pm, National Museum of Wildlife Art, Free. 307-739-1026 n Barre Fusion at Dancers’ Workshop 5:30pm, Dancers’ Workshop, Free. 307-733-6398 n Library Book Club: “The Boys in the Boat” by Daniel James Brown 5:30pm, Teton County Library Ordway Auditorium B, Free.

307-733-2164 n Injury Prevention and Performance for the Shoulder 5:30pm, Medicine Wheel Wellness, $15.00. 307-699-7480 n Hootenanny at Dornans 6:00pm, Dornans, Free. 307733-2415 n Beginning Painting: Acrylic 6:00pm, Drawing, Painting + Printmaking Studio, $100.00 $120.00. 307-733-6379 n Shooting Video with a DSLR 6:00pm, Photography Studio, $120.00 - $145.00. 307-7336379 n Evening Yoga 6:00pm, Teton Recreation Center, $8.00 - $82.50. 307739-9025 n Open Level Ballet at Dancers’ Workshop 6:30pm, Dancers’ Workshop, Free. 307-733-6398 n Monday Night Football 6:30pm, The Virginian Saloon, Free. 307-739-9891 n Open Gym - Adult Basketball 6:30pm, Teton Recreation Center, $3.75. 307-739-9025 n The JH Chorale Rehearsals 7:00pm, Music Center in the Center for the Arts, Free. 585872-4934

TUESDAY 10.27

n Kettlebells 7:00am, Teton Recreation Center, $8.00 - $82.50. 307739-9025 n Zumba at Dancers’ Workshop 8:30am, Dancers’ Workshop, Free. 307-733-6398 n Demo Week at Dancers’ Workshop 8:30am, Dancers’ Workshop Studios, Free. 307-733-6398 n Yoga 8:30am, Teton Recreation Center, $8.00 - $82.50. 307739-9025 n Engaging Board and Staff in a Strategic Approach to Change 8:30am, Community Foundation of Jackson Hole, $10.00 - $20.00. 307-739-1026 n Water Fitness 9:00am, Teton Recreation Center, $8.00 - $82.50. 307739-9025 n Ballet Workout at Dancers’ Workshop 9:30am, Dancers’ Workshop, Free. 307-733-6398 n Crystal Sound Bowl Experience with Daniela Botur 12:00pm, Intencions, Free. 307733-9290 n Open Gym - Adult Basketball 12:00pm, Teton Recreation Center, $3.75. 307-739-9025 n Public Skating 12:00pm, Snow King Sports & Events Center, $6.00 - $8.00.

307-201-1633 n MELT at Dancers’ Workshop 12:10pm, Dancers’ Workshop, Free. 307-733-6398 n Fall Tours at Astoria Hot Springs 1:00pm, Astoria Hot Springs, Free. 307-739-3942 n bootybarre® at Dancers’ Workshop 1:30pm, Dancers’ Workshop, Free. 307-733-6398 n Video Editing & Uploading - Computer Lab 3:00pm, Teton County Library Computer Lab, Free. 307-7332164 n Color through Culture 3:30pm, Borshell Children’s Studio, $45.00 - $55.00. 307733-6379 n InDesign: Brochure, Flyer and Book Layout 4:00pm, Photography Studio, $120.00 - $145.00. 307-7336379 n Owl-o-ween 4:00pm, Old Wilson Schoolhouse, Free. 307-203-2551 n Yoga

4:15pm, Teton Recreation Center, $8.00 - $82.50. 307739-9025 n Disc Golf Doubles 5:30pm, Disc Golf Course, $3.00. 614-506-7275 n Video Editing & Uploading - Computer Lab 5:30pm, Teton County Library Computer Lab, Free. 307-7332164 n Jazzercise 5:30pm, Teton Recreation Center, $8.00 - $82.50. 307739-9025 n Total Fitness 5:30pm, Teton Recreation Center, $8.00 - $82.50. 307739-9025 n Drawing 6:00pm, Drawing, Painting + Printmaking Studio, $100.00 $120.00. 307-733-6379 n Glass: Borosilicate Flameworking 6:00pm, Multi-Purpose Studio, $100.00 - $120.00. 307-7336379 n Shooting Video with a DSLR 6:00pm, Photography Studio, $120.00 - $145.00. 307-7336379 n LinkedIn Workshop 6:00pm, Center for the Arts, $40.00. 307-733-7425 n L.E.A.D (Latino Employees Achieving Dreams) 6:00pm, Latino Resource Center, 307-734-0333 n Wyoming Native Plant Society, Teton Chapter 6:00pm, Teton County Library Ordway Auditorium, Free. 307733-2164 n Beyond Morels: Foraging for Edible Plants in the Tetons presented by Annie Fenn 6:00pm, Teton County Library Ordway Auditorium, Free. 307733-2164 n Open Gym - Adult Volleyball 6:30pm, Teton Recreation Center, $3.75. 307-739-9025 n Spanish for Beginners 2 7:00pm, CWC-Jackson, $100.00. n Hip Hop at Dancers’ Workshop 7:00pm, Dancers’ Workshop, Free. 307-733-6398 n Adult Oil Painting 7:00pm, The Local Galleria, $25.00 - $80.00. 208-270-0883 n Language Exchange Night 7:00pm, Valley of the Tetons Library, Free. 208-787-2201 n One Ton Pig 7:30pm, Silver Dollar Showroom, Free. 307-732-3939 n Open Mic Night 9:00pm, Virginian Saloon, Free.

307-739-9891

WELL, THAT HAPPENED WALT DISNEY PICTURES

For complete event details visit pjhcalendar.com.

Spooky Rituals Halloween is a time for candy and ‘Hocus Pocus.’

BY ANDREW MUNZ

I

come from an old-fashioned family of Austrian immigrants who had no concept of Halloween before moving to the states.

Our major holiday traditions emerged from our Catholic roots, so days like Palm Sunday and Christmas Eve have fairly specific menus and customs that have been handed down through the Munz/Tesar families for generations. But the one holiday that was always mine and mine alone was a wholesome, sugar-filled American Halloween.

Nothing in this world has given me anywhere near the same amount of insane pleasure as Halloween, with its black and orange motif, caramel coating and witchiness. I haven’t let a single year go by where I haven’t a.) carved a pumpkin, b.) worn a costume, and most importantly, c.) watched the 1993 film “Hocus Pocus.” I can’t say what provoked this passionate obsession for something as stupid as a seasonal Disney movie, but for the past 20 years (that’s two decades, folks), I have not managed to get through the Halloween season without it.

If you think the film sucks, you’re wrong.

Simple as that. I say that because, as someone who overanalyzes movies to the point of repugnance, “Hocus Pocus,” even with its faults, manages to be a bizarrely good movie.

It’s hokey, it’s childish, it shouldn’t work, but it does! Still unconvinced? Let me clarify.

The plot revolves around Max Dennison (Omri Katz), a teenage L.A. transplant to Salem, Mass., a town that practically injects pure, concentrated, black tar Halloween spirit into its veins. While Max is apathetic to Halloween — a holiday he says was invented by the candy companies — his little sister Dani (Thora Birch) remains in her costume every moment she’s on screen. Forced to take Dani trick-or-treating, the two meet up with Max’s crush, Allison, (Vinessa Shaw), who informs them of the Old Sanderson House, a cottage in the woods where the fabled Sanderson sisters murdered children 300 years ago. Max, ready to impress the hot girl

The scary sweetness of the ‘Hocus Pocus’ potion makers is worth revisiting every Halloween.

(“Make a believer out of me”), convinces the trio to go check out the place, but then inadvertently brings the Sanderson sisters back to life. For the rest of the film, Max, Dani, Allison and a talking cat named Binx work hard to put the witches back in their graves before they kill all the children in Salem.

It’s a story that could easily be told through pure horror, complete with blood, gore and jump-scares, but “Hocus Pocus” ends up being one of the funniest films of the 1990s thanks in part to its stellar cast.

Winifred (Bette Midler), Mary (Kathy Najimy) and Sarah (Sarah Jessica Parker), with their commitment to their wacky roles, solidify themselves as the most amusing, bumbling villainesses in the Disney universe. As the witches navigate the 20th century trying to track down and kill our heroes, the three actresses devour every moment they’re on screen thanks in part to a great script that offers infinite quotable lines. “Twist the bones and bend the back. Itch-it-a-cop-it-amel-a-ka-mys-ti-ca. Trim him of his baby fat.

Itch-it-a-cop-it-a-mel-a-ka-mys-ti-ca. Give him fur black as black, just … like … thisssss.”

While it’s slightly embarrassing that I know “Hocus Pocus” like some people know “Caddyshack,” I’m certainly not the only superfan out there. The film has solidified itself as a cult classic for the Halloween crowd, as beloved as “The Nightmare Before Christmas” or “Scream.” Having seen the film so many times, I have a hard time even seeing the people on screen as actors, because the reality of the characters has become as natural to me as watching Luke Skywalker gazing at the setting suns of Tattooine. I never see Bette Midler in costume. I see Winifred Sanderson.

“Hocus Pocus” harkens back to the pre-information-age beauty of a 1990s Halloween, the Halloween I fell in love with growing up. The film remains timeless and despite some 1993 fashion choices (Tie-dye, Max? Really?), it feels unattached to any particular decade. Complete with “Martha Stewart Living” set pieces, over-the-top costumes and Sarah Jessica Parker’s flabbergastingly perfect breasts, “Hocus Pocus” will remain a part of my Halloween tradition and no doubt will entertain for generations.

It’s no coincidence that Winifred Sanderson sings, “I put a spell on you. And now, you’re mine.” Watch. Watch. Watch until we die. PJH

Kiwanis Follies

SILENT AUCTION

34th annual

A satire and lampooning of Jackson current events, public figures and colorful characters.

Doors Open 6:00pm Show Starts 7:30pm Teton County Fairgrounds Exhibit Hall

••••

LIVE AUCTION • RAFFLE It's our only fundraiser of the year!

Tickets Proceeds go to the purchase of a new $20 Pediatric Audio Booth at St. John’s Medical Center.

BYOB

Available Complimentary soda - Western Wyoming Beverage at Teton Motors, Complimentary popcorn - Jackson Hole POP from any Kiwanis member, or at the door

FRIDAY AND SATURDAY, OCTOBER 23RD & 24TH • • • •

DUD e , WHere’s my Car? The Town of Jackson’s overnight parking ban has gone into effect.

SO, if you want to void all kinds of hassles, listen up!

Through April 15th, between 3:00am & 7:00am,

Town residents are responsible for keeping sidewalks shoveled.

• The TOJ assists with snow removal in the downtown core and along Broadway.

• Residents should not put their garbage cans out the night before, but rather after 7:00am on garbage days.

• Please keep trash cans, cars, and other obstacles out of the streets and off of the curbs.

This saves your property and makes the streets more clear of drifts and snow.

• Residents are also encouraged to help keep fire hydrants clear of snow.

BROUGHT TO YOU

BY THE FRIENDLY FOLKS AT THE TOWN OF JACKSON

OCTOBER 21, 2015 | 19

it is illegal to park overnight on Jackson streets, including public parking lots, regardless of weather (rain or shine, snow or bikini). Crews begin plowing at 3am. Parked cars on town streets make the job of keeping roads clear of snow more difficult.

Consequently, cars left on town streets between 3am & 7am will be ticketed and may be towed by Jackson police. To retrieve your car, contact Ron’s Towing at 733-8697, 1190 S. Hwy 89. Overnight parking is allowed in the public parking structure at W. Simpson Ave. and S. Millward St. but not on other town parking lots.

Additionally, we would like to remind people:

| PLANET JACKSON HOLE |

PARKING RESTRICTIONS

SHOVELING REQUIREMENTS

| PLANET JACKSON HOLE |

20 | OCTOBER 21, 2015

LOUNGE

EVENTS

PATIO

VIP TABLE RESERVATIONS 216.375.4684 • TIX AVAILABLE AT SKYSLC.COM 149 PIERPONT AVE • DOWNTOWN SLC +21

Who’s up for a road trip? There’s plenty to do down south in Salt Lake City next weekend.

Whether your interests lie in music, theater and the arts—or something a bit more downto-earth—here’s what’s going on in the Beehive State. (Visit cityweekly.net/events for complete listings.) So hit the road! But be sure and bring a snack—because, now and then, everybody craves something salty.

WEEKEND OF OCT. 23

n Aaron Wallis: The Street Bible Fri - Sat Mestizo Institute of Culture & Arts, 631 W. North Temple, Suite 700, Salt Lake City, Free n The Addams Family Fri - Sat Beverly’s Terrace Plaza Playhouse, 99 East 4700 South, South Ogden, 7:30pm, $9.00 - $14.00, 801-3930070 n Amalia Ulman: Stock Images of War Fri - Sat Utah Museum of Contemporary Art, 20 S West Temple, Salt Lake City, Free, 801-328-4201 n An Evening with Matt Nathanson Fri The State Room, 638 S State Street, Salt Lake City, 9:00pm n Between the Wars: The Great Depression in Northern Utah Fri - Sat Brigham City Museum of Art and History, 24 N. 300 West, Brigham City, Free, n Birds of Paradise: Amazing Avian Evolution Fri - Sun Natural History Museum of Utah, 301 Wakara Way, Salt Lake City, 10:00am, $9.00 - $13.00, 801-581-6927 n Breaking Vlad Fri - Sat The Off Broadway Theatre, 272 Main Street, Salt Lake City, 7:30pm, $10.00 - $16.00 n Brian Bress: Make Your Own Friends Fri - Sun Utah Museum of Fine Arts, 410 Campus Center Drive, Salt Lake City, $12.00 - $14.00, 801-581-7332 n Brian Christensen: RECONFIGURE Fri - Sat CUAC, 175 E. 200 South, Salt Lake City, Free, n Brian Selznick: The Marvels Fri Salt Lake City Main Library, 210 E. 400 South, Salt Lake City, 7:00pm, Free n Bride of Frankenstein Fri - Sat Industrial Warehouse “Theater”, 1030 South 300 West, Salt Lake City, 8:00pm, $12.00 - $40.00 n The British Passion for Landscape: Masterpieces from National Museum Wales Fri - Sun Utah Museum of Fine Arts, 410 Campus Center Drive, Salt Lake City, $12.00 - $14.00, 801-581-7332 n Buried Child Fri, Sat, Sun Sugar Space Arts Warehouse, 132 S. 800 West, Salt Lake City, 8:00pm, $18.00 n Castle of Chaos Fri - Sat Castle of Chaos, 7980 S. State, Midvale, $20.00 - $35.00 n Chad Farnes: Duct Tape Paintings Fri Finch Lane Gallery, 54 Finch Lane, Salt Lake City, 9:00am, Free, 801-596-5000

n Clue: The Musical Fri, Sat Empress Theatre, 2700 S. 9104 West, Magna, 7:30pm, $10.00, 801-347-7373 n Dining in the Dark Fri The Leonardo, 209 E. 500 South, Salt Lake City, 7:00pm, $55.00 - $75.00 n DISNEY’S BEAUTY AND THE BEAST JR. Fri Hale Center Theatre - Orem, 225 W 400 N, Orem, 4:30pm n FAITH & FAMILY LGBTQ POWER SUMMIT Fri Radisson Hotel Salt Lake City Downtown, 215 W. South Temple, Salt Lake City, 9:30am, $100.00 n Fear Factory Fri - Sat Fear Factory, 666 W. 800 South, Salt Lake City, 7:00pm, $22.00 - $25.00 n Firelei Baez: Patterns of Resistance Fri - Sat Utah Museum of Contemporary Art, 20 S West Temple, Salt Lake City, Free n Garden After Dark Red Butte Garden Fri - Sat Red Butte Garden, 300 Wakara Way, Salt Lake City, 6:00pm, $0.00 - $12.00 n GET FREAKY 2015 Fri - Sat The Great Saltair, 12408 West Saltair Drive, Magna, 7:00pm, $40.00 - $150.00 n Grimm Ghost Tours Fri - Sat 18 West South Temple, 18 W. South Temple, Salt Lake City, 9:00pm, $13.00 - $25.00 n James and the Giant Peach Fri SCERA, 745 S St, Orem, 7:00pm, $4.00 - $6.00 n Jekyll & Hyde Fri - Sun Heritage Theatre, 2505 South Highway 89, Perry, $9.00 - $10.00, 435-723-8392 n Keith Stubbs Fri - Sat Wiseguys Ogden, 269 25th, Ogden, 8:00pm n Lagoon Frightmares Fri - Sun Lagoon, 375 Lagoon Drive, Farmington, 5:00pm, $37.50 - $49.95 n Laughing Stock Fri The Off Broadway Theatre, 272 S. Main Street, Salt Lake City, 10:00pm, $8.00 - $11.00 n Lizze Määttälä: Uphill/Both Ways Fri - Sat Utah Museum of Contemporary Art, 20 S West Temple, Salt Lake City, Free, 801-328-4201 n Mystery Escape Room Fri - Sat The Gateway, 157 S. Rio Grande St., Salt Lake City, 9:30am, $29.95 n New York Doll 10 Year Anniversary Screening Fri Covey Center for the Arts, 425 West Center St, Provo, 7:00pm n Nightmare on 13th Fri - Sat Nightmare on 13th, 300 W. 1300 South, Salt Lake City, 7:30pm, $15.00 - $40.00 n Odyssey Dance: Thriller Fri, Sat, Sat Kingsbury Hall, 1395 Presidents Cir, Salt Lake City, 7:30pm, $20.00 - $25.00 n Rebecca Klundt: Reformation - A Rearranging of Elements Fri Rio Grande Depot, 300 S. Rio Grande Street, Salt Lake City, 8:00am, Free, 801-245-7272 n The Rocky Horror Show Concert Version Fri, Sat, Sat Pioneer Theater Company, 300 S. 1400 East, Salt Lake City, 8:00pm, $25.00 - $40.00 n Shawn Porter: Into the Ether Fri - Sat Utah Museum of Contemporary Art, 20 S West Temple, Salt Lake City, $5.00 n Stefan Lesueur: Obscura Fri - Sat Utah Museum of Contemporary Art, 20 S. West Temple, Salt Lake City, 11:00am, Free n Strangling Brothers Haunted Circus Fri - Sat Strangling Brothers Haunted Circus, 98 E. 13800 South, Draper, 7:30pm, $25.00 - $40.00, 801 850-8060 n Strayboots Interactive Scavenger Hunt

Fri - Sun Salt Lake CIty, Salt Lake City, 10:00am, $10.00, 877-787-2929 n Young Frankenstein Fri, Sat The Grand Theatre, 1575 S State St, Salt Lake City, 7:30pm, $18.00 - $20.00 n Young Frankenstein Fri - Sat The Ziegfeld Theater, 3934 Washington Blvd., South Ogden, 7:30pm, $17.00 - $20.00 n Dia de los Muertos Celebration Sat Westminster on The Draw, 2120 South 1300 East, Salt Lake City, 6:00pm, $35.00 - $45.00, 801-466-6730 n Downtown Farmer’s Market Sat Pioneer Park, 300 W 300 S, Salt Lake City, 8:00am, Free n Janet: Unbreakable Sat EnergySolutions Arena, 301 W South Temple, Salt Lake City, 7:00pm, $26.75 - $122.00 n Lora Koehler and Jake Parker: The Little Snowplow Sat The King’s English Bookshop, 1511 S. 1500 East, Salt Lake City, 10:00am, Free n Monster Block Party Sat Gallivan Center, 239 S Main Street, Salt Lake City, 11:00am, Free, 801-535-7704 n Strut Your Mutt 5K/Walk - Best Friends Animal Society Sat Liberty Park, 600 E 900 S, Salt Lake City, 8:30am, $0.00 - $45.00, 435-644-2001, n 9th West Farmers Market Sun Jordan Park, 1060 S. 900 West, Salt Lake City, 10:00am, Free n Brad Williams Sun Wiseguys West Valley City, 2194 West 3500 South, West Valley City, 7:30pm

WEEKEND OF OCT. 30

| PLANET JACKSON HOLE |

OCTOBER 21, 2015 | 21

n The Addams Family Fri - Sat Beverly’s Terrace Plaza Playhouse, 99 East 4700 South, South Ogden, 7:30pm, $9.00 - $14.00, 801-3930070 n Amalia Ulman: Stock Images of War Fri - Sat Utah Museum of Contemporary Art, 20 S West Temple, Salt Lake City, Free, 801-328-4201 n Between the Wars: The Great Depression in Northern Utah Fri - Sat Brigham City Museum of Art and History, 24 N. 300 West, Brigham City, Free n Birds of Paradise: Amazing Avian Evolution Fri, Sat, Sun Natural History Museum of Utah, 301 Wakara Way, Salt Lake City, 10:00am, $9.00 - $13.00, 801-5816927 n Breaking Vlad Fri - Sat The Off Broadway Theatre, 272 Main Street, Salt Lake City, 7:30pm, $10.00 - $16.00 n Brian Bress: Make Your Own Friends Fri - Sun Utah Museum of Fine Arts, 410 Campus Center Drive, Salt Lake City, $12.00 - $14.00, 801-581-7332 n Brian Christensen: RECONFIGURE Fri - Sat CUAC, 175 E. 200 South, Salt Lake City, Free, n Bride of Frankenstein Fri, Fri, Sat, Sat Industrial Warehouse “Theater”, 1030 South 300 West, Salt Lake City, 11:00pm, $12.00 - $40.00 n The British Passion for Landscape: Masterpieces from National Museum Wales Fri - Sun Utah Museum of Fine Arts, 410 Campus Center Drive, Salt Lake City, $12.00 - $14.00, 801-581-7332 n Carrie: The Musical Fri, Sat, Sat, Sun Sorenson Unity Center, 1383 S. 900 West, Salt Lake City, 7:30pm, $15.00 - $18.00 n Castle of Chaos Fri - Sat Castle of Chaos, 7980 S. State, Midvale, $20.00 - $35.00

n Chad Farnes: Duct Tape Paintings Fri Finch Lane Gallery, 54 Finch Lane, Salt Lake City, 9:00am, Free, 801-596-5000 n Clue: The Musical Fri Empress Theatre, 2700 S. 9104 West, Magna, 7:30pm, $10.00, 801-347-7373 n Día de los Muertos History Fri - Sun Mestizo Institute of Culture & Arts, 631 W. North Temple, Suite 700, Salt Lake City, 6:00pm, Free n Fear Factory Fri - Sat Fear Factory, 666 W. 800 South, Salt Lake City, 7:00pm, $22.00 - $25.00 n Firelei Baez: Patterns of Resistance Fri - Sat Utah Museum of Contemporary Art, 20 S West Temple, Salt Lake City, Free n Garden After Dark Red Butte Garden Fri Red Butte Garden, 300 Wakara Way, Salt Lake City, 6:00pm, $0.00 - $12.00 n Garth Brooks + Trisha Yearwood Fri, Fri, Sat EnergySolutions Arena, 301 W South Temple, Salt Lake City, 10:30pm, $74.98 n Grimm Ghost Tours Fri - Sat 18 West South Temple, 18 W. South Temple, Salt Lake City, 9:00pm, $13.00 - $25.00 n James and the Giant Peach Fri - Sun SCERA, 745 S St, Orem, 7:00pm, $4.00 - $6.00 n Jekyll & Hyde Fri - Sun Heritage Theatre, 2505 South Highway 89, Perry, $9.00 - $10.00, 435-723-8392 n Lagoon Frightmares Fri Lagoon, 375 Lagoon Drive, Farmington, 5:00pm, $37.50 - $49.95 n Laughing Stock Fri The Off Broadway Theatre, 272 S. Main Street, Salt Lake City, 10:00pm, $8.00 - $11.00 n Lizze Määttälä: Uphill/Both Ways Fri - Sat Utah Museum of Contemporary Art, 20 S West Temple, Salt Lake City, Free, 801-328-4201 n Mystery Escape Room Fri - Sat The Gateway, 157 S. Rio Grande St., Salt Lake City, 9:30am, $29.95 n Nightmare on 13th Fri - Sat Nightmare on 13th, 300 W. 1300 South, Salt Lake City, 7:30pm, $15.00 - $40.00 n Odyssey Dance: Thriller Fri, Sat, Sat Kingsbury Hall, 1395 Presidents Cir, Salt Lake City, 7:30pm, $20.00 - $25.00 n Outside Mullingar Fri, Sat, Sat Pioneer Theater Company, 300 S. 1400 East, Salt Lake City, 8:00pm, $25.00 - $44.00 n Rebecca Klundt: Reformation - A Rearranging of Elements Fri Rio Grande Depot, 300 S. Rio Grande Street, Salt Lake City, 8:00am, Free, 801-245-7272 n Shawn Porter: Into the Ether Fri - Sat Utah Museum of Contemporary Art, 20 S West Temple, Salt Lake City, $5.00 n Stefan Lesueur: Obscura Fri - Sat Utah Museum of Contemporary Art, 20 S. West Temple, Salt Lake City, 11:00am, Free n Strangling Brothers Haunted Circus Fri - Sat Strangling Brothers Haunted Circus, 98 E. 13800 South, Draper, 7:30pm, $25.00 - $40.00, 801 850-8060 n Strayboots Interactive Scavenger Hunt Fri, Sat, Sun Salt Lake CIty, Salt Lake City, 10:00am, $10.00, 877-787-2929 n War of the Worlds Fri Clark Planetarium, 110 South 400 West, Salt Lake City, 7:00pm, Free n Young Frankenstein Fri The Grand Theatre, 1575 S State St, Salt Lake City, 7:30pm, $18.00 - $20.00

| PLANET JACKSON HOLE |

22 | OCTOBER 21, 2015

CINEMA iConic Steve Jobs provides an entertaining, insightful look at a genius jerk.

BY MARYANN JOHANSON @maryannjohanson

S

For all MEETING AGENDAS AND MINUTES WEEKLY CALENDAR JOB OPENINGS SOLICITATIONS FOR BIDS PUBLIC NOTICES AND OTHER VALUABLE INFORMATION

Visit our website

TetonWyo.org The public meeting agendas and minutes for the Board of County Commissioners and Planning Commission can also be found in the Public Notices section of the JH News and Guide.

teve Jobs: Genius. Visionary. Asshole.

Steve Jobs is not a traditional biography of the Apple founder and, later, its returning hero and savior. We don’t peek in on his childhood, or on the battle with pancreatic cancer that he eventually lost.

This is much narrower—the tale of how one man revolutionized the computer industry and, as a result, changed the world, through sheer force of personality. And as depicted here, that personality was mainly Breathtakingly Narcissistic Jerk, all raging arrogance massively overcompensating for past rejection, but also a personality of dazzling brilliance, foresight and imagination.

You’ve never seen such a compelling and entertaining and insightful movie about a genius jerk. Ever. Steve Jobs is as smart and as sleek and as essential as … well, as the unibody aluminum Macbook Pro I composed this review on. And it’s funny in that snarky, let’s-change-the-world-while-wewalk-and-talk Aaron Sorkin way. Sorkin, who also wrote about digital-age icons in the screenplay for The Social Network, has adapted Walter Isaacson’s biography of Jobs in a way that only Sorkin would. He shows us an insider’s perspective on three very public Jobs-Apple events: the 1984 launch of the Macintosh, the 1988 launch of Next computer (which he founded after he was booted from Apple yet which became part of his long-game Macintosh plan), and the 1998 launch of the iMac. We meet Jobs—beautifully embodied

by Michael Fassbender, who doesn’t much look like Jobs yet manages to be eerie in the impersonation anyway—and become immersed in his unique view on the world during these last-minute preparations for the moments many of us are familiar with.

This is probably most true of the 1998 one, by which point Jobs had morphed into the now-iconically black-turtlenecked figure introducing to us the latest techno-doodad

TRY THESE Slumdog Millionaire (2008) Dev Patel Freida Pinto Rated R

Michael Fassbender as Steve Jobs. we’d soon discover we couldn’t live without.

Steve Jobs is almost a stage play, except that virtuoso director Danny Boyle (Slumdog Millionaire) renders it all so cinematically that it could never be mistaken for one. Boyle uses, for instance, his return to real Jobs locations, such as the San Francisco opera house for the Next launch, to glorious effect, letting them make marvelous statements on the outsized-ness of Jobs and the mad beauty of Jobs’s vision.

But there’s a stage-like intimacy to how we eavesdrop on the interactions between Jobs and a small handful of people before each event, most importantly his head of marketing and best platonic friend Joanna Hoffman (Kate Winslet); and his daughter, Lisa (played, respectively, at ages 5, 9, and 19 by Makenzie Moss, Ripley Sobo and Perla Haney-Jardine).

Much of what we overhear relates to engineering and marketing and corporate governance, and Sorkin and Boyle do not hold our hands through it. We get it anyway. Much of the rest of it relates to what a monster he was to his daughter, wrapping the family side of Jobs’s life up with the work side; it’s the same impulses driving everything he does. Which is perfectly understandable. Yet I can’t recall a film that so beautifully gets right the complicated yet still creative mess that one person’s life

The Social Network (2010) Jesse Eisenberg Andrew Garfield Rated PG-13

can be, or that manages it in such a deeply satisfying way.

And then there’s this: All of what we witness has a certain impact only via what we bring with us into the movie. Steve Jobs assumes that we understand how important Jobs was to how we live today. It assumes that we have a long and intimate relationship with the Mac and with Apple products such as the iPod and the iPhone, or with the various non-Apple products that have raced to catch up with their innovations. None of that is in the film, and yet it is there all the same. There is nothing in Steve Jobs that is mythologizing of the man, and nothing in the film that is about the cult of the Mac. And yet it is all about how that happened anyway. If history is all about finding the roots of the present in the past, then this is one of the more compulsory bits of modern history I’ve ever seen. PJH

STEVE JOBS BBBB Michael Fassbender Kate Winslet Seth Rogen Rated R

Shame (2011) Michael Fassbender Carey Mulligan Rated NC-17

Jobs (2013) Ashton Kutcher Dermot Mulroney Rated PG-13

Sweet, Savory, Autumnal A cornucopia of apple recipes to sate every kind of taste bud.

BY ANNIE FENN, MD @jacksonfoodie

W

hen the first apples roll into the valley, I can’t help but pick up a few bushels. How’s your apple haul going? Just in case you need help plowing through that box, I’ve scoured the Internet, my cookbooks and recipe box for this hyper-seasonal, must-do apple list.

Pick your own: Some of my friends have been heading over to Ammon, Idaho, to pick their own Cortland, Honeycrisp, McIntosh, Empire, Early Gold and Spartan apples. The season is just about over at the apple orchard just outside of Idaho Falls, but there may be a few good days of apple picking left. Call first: 208-201-8969.

Eat them raw: The first apples of the season are best eaten every time a snack is in order. They are only this crisp and this good once a year, so enjoy. Add chopped fresh apples to oatmeal, salads, ice cream and yogurt. Snack on them smeared with almond butter, peanut butter or Nutella.

Apple brie panini: Layer thinly sliced apples onto sturdy bread with your favorite cheese (I like Brie). No panini press?

Get two heavy frying pans really hot and press your sandwich between them.

Oven roasted applesauce: Making applesauce on the stovetop requires several hours of watchful stewing and stirring. It’s far easier to oven roast your applesauce. Place peeled, quartered and cored apples on a baking sheet and toss with

a dash of salt and a pinch of sugar. Dab with 2 tablespoons of butter, cover tightly with foil, and bake at 375 degrees for 15 to 30 minutes. Once soft, remove the cover, increase the heat to 500 degrees, and roast for another 10 minutes. Scrape into a bowl and mash into a sauce. Season with salt and sugar, if needed, and a teaspoon of apple cider vinegar.

Apple butter: Applesauce is great, but apple butter is sublime. It takes a bit longer to turn your apples into butter, but it can be done in a Crock Pot with little hands-on time. My friend Bob makes Chinese five-spice apple butter by filling a Crock Pot with peeled and cored apples cut into chunks, a generous spoonful of Chinese five-spice powder, and a glug of apple cider vinegar. Set the slow cooker on low and 12 hours later the apples will be transformed into a deep brown, spreadable butter.

Zuni Café apple pie: Of course you should make an apple pie! I am not much of a pie baker, but my friend Judy just made one of the best I’ve ever had from the Zuni Café Cookbook by Judy Rodgers. She threw in a handful of cranberries and we were all in heaven. (Recipe can be found after a few clicks on Google — it’s a classic.)

Apple crostata: This is my kind of pie — a freeform rustic affair where the crust is placed on a baking sheet and loosely folded up around a mound of sliced apples tossed with orange zest, allspice, cinnamon and sugar. I have made Ina Garten’s recipe dozens of times (Google it) and it is perfect every time, just make sure the dough is really cold when you form the crostata.

Baked apples: It’s just so easy to core out the center of an apple, stuff it with chopped walnuts, dates and brown sugar, and bake it in the oven. My favorite recipe for baked apples is topped with a sauce of curry-spiked mascarpone cheese, which melts into a beautiful sauce over the warm apples. Find the recipe over at JacksonHoleFoodie.com.

Roasted apples and turnips: I love roasting those little white Hakuri turnips that Cosmic Apple Gardens grows, and apples bring out their sweet flavor. Snap off the turnip greens and set aside. Cut turnips and peeled apples into same-size pieces. Toss with olive oil and salt; roast in the oven at 400 degrees until brown. Deglaze the pan with a few tablespoons of apple cider. Serve root-to-stalk by chopping the turnip greens, quickly sautéing in a frying pan, and sprinkling over the turnips to serve.

Apple peel cider vinegar: How about turning discarded apple peels and cores into your own homemade vinegar?

Save them as you plow through that box of apples in a Ziploc bag in the freezer until you’ve collected two quarts. Place in a large ceramic bowl with one-third cup sugar that has been dissolved in two quarts water. Cover with a plate and weigh

ANNIE FENN, MD

down with something heavy to keep the solids submerged.

Cover the entire bowl with cheesecloth and leave on the counter in a dark spot for six to seven days. Now strain the solids from the liquid, and place the liquid in jars or bottles.

Secure a piece of cheesecloth over the top with a rubber band; age at room temperature for six to eight weeks. You’ll have a vinegar mother after just two weeks.

Apple and fennel soup: Take your apples in a savory direction with this perfectly autumnal soup. Apples are simmered with celery, fennel, lemon, honey and chicken stock.

Once tender, a handful of fresh mint and thyme are added and the soup is pureed. Finish with a touch of cream and a handful of watercress. Find the recipe at Food52.com Apple cardamom shrub: Once you’ve eaten your way through a bushel or two of apples, it’s time to congratulate yourself with a nice drink. There are bound to be a few squishy apples left rolling around the bottom of the box — don’t toss them! These partially fermented apples are perfect for making shrubs: a concentrated fruit and vinegar syrup that is used as the base for a refreshing drink, spiked or not.

Quarter three apples and shred using a grater or food processor. Add one-cup apple cider vinegar, one-half cup turbinado sugar, and one-teaspoon ground cardamom. Cover and leave in a cool place on the countertop for two days. Strain out the solids and pour the liquid into a clean mason jar. Cap tightly and shake to combine. Store in the fridge for up to one year.

To drink: Combine equal parts shrub and sparkling water and serve over ice. Spike with a shot of your favorite spirit if you like.

I’m sure you can come up with your own favorite apple recipe. Share it with me online at PlanetJH.com.

Upcoming Foodie Events Hey foraging friends: I am teaming up with Teton Plants, the Jackson chapter of the Wyoming Native Plant Society to present “Beyond Morels: Foraging for Edible Plants in the Tetons.” Join me at 6 p.m., Oct. 27 at the Teton County Library to learn how to identify, cook and preserve the wild greens and mushrooms in our backyard. It’s free and open to the public.

And be sure to come over to my house on Oct. 24 for the Feast of the Tetons, a harvest dinner to benefit Slow Food in the Tetons. Chef René Stein will be cooking up a very special meal for 45 guests. There are just a few tickets left: TetonSlowFood.org. PJH After delivering babies and practicing gynecology for 20 years in Jackson, Annie traded her life as a doctor to pursue her other passion: writing about food, health, sustainability and the local food scene. Follow her snippets of mountain life, with recipes, at JacksonHoleFoodie.com and on Instagram @ jacksonholefoodie.

OCTOBER 21, 2015 | 23

Honeycrisp crackers: Slice honeycrisp apples at right angles to the stem about one-quarter inch thick — a mandoline works well for this. Place on a baking sheet covered with parchment paper, sprinkle with coarse sugar, and bake at 150 degrees for about four hours or until dehydrated. When cool, smear with goat cheese and top with smoked trout. (Recipe

by Chef Eric Wilson.)

Apples ready for the picking in Ammon, Idaho, (left); Whit Hall with his cache of freshly picked Cortlands (middle) and a cake that thinks it’s a pie – Browned Butter Apple Cake.

| PLANET JACKSON HOLE |

Browned butter apple cake: My favorite fall cake is a like an upside down pie. Sliced apples and browned butter are placed in a pie plate. A simple batter of hazelnut or almond flour, sugar, eggs and cinnamon is smeared over the apples.

It bakes up crispy on top and juicy on the bottom. Find the recipe at JacksonHoleFoodie.com.

LIBBY HALL

LIBBY HALL

THE FOODIE FILES

| PLANET JACKSON HOLE |

24 | OCTOBER 21, 2015

BEER, WINE & SPIRITS

Champagne Wishes Celebrate the famous bubbles of France this week.

BY TED SCHEFFLER @critic1

I

n my opinion, any day is a good day for Champagne. However, for those who need an official reason to celebrate bottled bubbles, Global Champagne Day is on Oct. 23. From Australia to Paris and Hong Kong to Rio, Champagne toasts will be in abundance on Champagne Day. A number of restaurants and bars throughout the country—STK in Las Vegas comes to mind—will offer a complimentary glass of Champagne to their guests on Champagne Day. But, what of this stuff called Champagne?

If you’ve only sipped Champagne at weddings, you might not be all that fond of it, since it was likely sickeningly sweet or

Take-out just got

easier!

Use the code “Planet” for 15% off your next online order.

Order at PizzeriaCaldera.com, on our Facebook page or via our app for iOS and Android.

11am - 9:30pm daily 20 W Broadway 307 - 201 - 1472

brutally dry. Indeed, Champagne runs the gamut in styles from Gobi Desert dry to teeth-aching sweet.

First things first, though: Champagne is wine. To be called Champagne, it has to come from the Champagne region of France, about 90 miles northeast of Paris.

California and other winemaking regions might produce excellent sparkling wines— wine with bubbles—but they are not Champagne. There are approximately 110 producers of Champagne in France—called houses—most based in Reims and Epernay.

Like most still wines—Sauvignon Blanc, for example—Champagne isn’t just one thing. It ranges widely in style and type, from very light to full-bodied and, as mentioned, from bone dry to very sweet.

The most popular and common type of Champagne is golden-colored, and made by blending three Champagne-grown grapes: Chardonnay, Pinot Noir and Pinot Meunier. Also produced in Champagne are three other types: Blanc de Blancs, Blanc de Noirs, and Rosé Champagnes.

Blanc de Blancs (white from whites) Champagnes are made solely from Chardonnay grapes, a style created by the founder of Salon Champagne, EugèneAimé Salon. Salon is the best Blanc de Blancs on the planet, and probably the most expensive. Taittinger and Krug are other

IMBIBE consistently excellent producers of Blanc de Blancs.

Somewhat rare even in the Champagne region itself, Blanc de Noirs (white from blacks) is a pink-hued Champagne style made entirely from black grapes, usually Pinot Noir and/ or Pinot Meunier. The House of Bollinger is France’s premier Blanc de Noirs Champagne producer.

Rosé Champagne is my personal favorite style, and after spending a week in Reims and Epernay, I really learned to love it with a wide variety of foods, from foie gras to a lunchtime croque-monsieur sandwich.

Rosé Champagne is a blend of Pinot Noir and Chardonnay, but can vary greatly in ratio from producer to producer.

You can find full-bodied Rosé Champagne that’s as much as four-fifths Pinot Noir, or a light, golden version that’s

Trio is located just off the town square in downtown Jackson, and is owned & operated by local chefs with a passion for good food.

Our menu features contemporary American dishes inspired by classic bistro cuisine. Daily specials feature wild game, fish and meats.

Enjoy a glass of wine at the bar in front of the wood-burning oven and watch the chefs perform in the open kitchen.

four-fifths Chardonnay, or anything in between. I especially like the Rosè Champagnes from Roederer, Gosset and Moët & Chandon.

As with most wines, it pays to read the labels on Champagne bottles. How else would you know if you’re buying sweet Champagne or dry (non-sweet)? For practical purposes, Champagnes are ranked and labeled according to sweetness or dryness. From least sweet (more dry) to most sweet (least dry) the categories you’re most likely to find are these: Brut (dry), Extra Dry (medium dry), Sec (slightly sweet), and Demi-Sec (very sweet). There are also extreme categories at both ends of the spectrum— Extra Brut (extremely dry) and Doux (extremely sweet)—but coming across these champagnes is relatively rare.

For celebrating Global Champagne Day, I suggest picking up a few bottles of the various styles of Champagne, varying in sweetness and dryness, and pop the corks with friends and family. À votre santé! PJH

Local is a modern American steakhouse and bar located on Jackson’s historic town square.

Serving locally raised beef and, regional game, fresh seafood and seasonally inspired food, Local offers the perfect setting for lunch, drinks or dinner.

Lunch 11:30am Monday-Saturday Dinner 5:30pm Nightly

Dinner Nightly at 5:30pm 45 S. Glenwood Available for private events & catering For reservations please call 734-8038

HAPPY HOUR Daily 4-6:00pm

307.201.1717 | LOCALJH.COM ON THE TOWN SQUARE

®

Large Specialty Pizza ADD: Wings (8 pc)

Medium Pizza (1 topping) Stuffed Cheesy Bread

$ 13 99

for an extra $5.99/each

(307) 733-0330 520 S. Hwy. 89 • Jackson, WY

Featuring dining destinations from buffets and rooms with a view to mom and pop joints, chic cuisine and some of our dining critic’s faves!

ASIAN & CHINESE TETON THAI Serving the world’s most exciting cuisine.

Teton Thai offers a splendid array of flavors: sweet, hot, sour, salt and bitter. All balanced and blended perfectly, satisfying the most discriminating palate. Open daily. 7432 Granite Loop Road in Teton Village, (307) 733-0022 and in Driggs, (208) 787-8424, tetonthai.com.

KAZUMI Kazumi is a family-owned and operated restaurant serving unique sushi rolls, fresh sashimi and nigiri, and off-the-charts specialty items. Located near the Town Square, we also feature hot noodle soups and the spiciest rolls in town! Open Monday through Saturday at 11 a.m - 9:30 p.m. 265 West Broadway, 307-7339168, jacksonholesushi.com.

CONTINENTAL THE BLUE LION

FAMILY FRIENDLY ENVIRONMENT PIZZAS, PASTAS & MORE HOUSEMADE BREAD & DESSERTS FRESH, LOCALLY SOURCED OFFERINGS TAKE OUT AVAILABLE

A Jackson Hole favorite since 1965

LIMIT 1 PER A TABLE

265 WEST BROADWAY 307-733-9168 JACKSONHOLESUSHI.COM

Serving inspired home cooked classics in a historic log cabin. Enjoy brunch daily at 8 a.m., dinner nightly at 5 p.m., and happy hour daily 3-5:30 p.m. featuring $5 glasses of wine, $5 specialty drinks, $3 bottled beer. 135 E. Broadway, (307) 732-1910, genevievejh.com.

ELEANOR’S Enjoy all the perks of fine dining, minus the dress code at Eleanor’s, serving rich, saucy dishes in a warm and friendly setting. Eleanor’s is a primo brunch spot on Sunday afternoons.

Its bar alone is an attraction, thanks to reasonably priced drinks and a loyal crowd.

Come get a belly-full of our two-time gold medal wings. Open at 11 a.m. daily. 832 W. Broadway, (307) 733-7901.

FULL STEAM SUBS The deli that’ll rock your belly. Jackson’s newest sub shop serves steamed subs, reubens, gyros, delicious all beef hot dogs, soups and salads. We offer Chicago style hot dogs done just the way they do in the windy city. Open daily11 a.m. to 7 p.m. Located just a short block north of the Town Square at 180 N. Center Street, (307) 733-3448.

OCTOBER 21, 2015 | 25

BUY 1 GET 1 APPETIZERS

CAFE GENEVIEVE

| PLANET JACKSON HOLE |

Dining room and bar open nightly at 5:00pm (307) 733-2460 • 2560 Moose Wilson Road • Wilson, WY

A Jackson Hole favorite for 37 years. Join us in the charming atmosphere of a historic home.

Ask a local about our rack of lamb. Serving fresh fish, elk, poultry, steaks, and vegetarian entrées. Live acoustic guitar music most nights.

Open nightly at 5:30 p.m. Early Bird Special: 20% off Entire Bill between 5:30-6:00pm. Must mention ad. Reservations recommended, walk-ins welcome. 160 N. Millward, (307) 7333912, bluelionrestaurant.com

| PLANET JACKSON HOLE |

26 | OCTOBER 21, 2015

LOCAL Local, a modern American steakhouse and bar, is located on Jackson’s historic town square. Our menu features both classic and specialty cuts of locally-ranched meats and wild game alongside fresh seafood, shellfish, house-ground burgers, and seasonallyinspired food. We offer an extensive wine list and an abundance of locally-sourced products.

Offering a casual and vibrant bar atmosphere with 12 beers on tap as well as a relaxed dining room, Local is the perfect spot to grab a burger for lunch or to have drinks and dinner with friends. Our deck is open! Lunch Daily 11:30am.

Dinner Nightly 5:30pm. 55 North Cache, (307) 201-1717, localjh.com.

Breakfast • Lunch •••••••

Serving breakfast and lunch daily 9am - 3pm 145 N. Glenwood (307) 734-0882 WWW.TETONLOTUSCAFE.COM

LOTUS CAFE Mangy Moose Restaurant, with locally sourced, seasonally FRESH FOOD at reasonable prices, is a always a FUN PLACE to go with family or friends for a unique dining experience. The personable staff will make you feel RIGHT AT HOME and the funky western decor will keep you entertained throughout your entire visit.

Reservations at (307) 733-4913 3295 Village Drive • Teton Village, WY

www.mangymoose.com

Steamed Subs Hot Dogs Soups & Salads

The Deli That’ll Rock Your Belly 307-733-3448 | Open Daily 11am-7pm 180 N. Center St. | 1 block n. of Town Square Next to Home Ranch Parking Lot

THE LOCALS

FAVORITE PIZZA 2012, 2013 & 2014

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TV Sports Packages and 7 Screens

Under the Pink Garter Theatre (307) 734-PINK • www.pinkygs.com

Serving organic, freshly-made world cuisine while catering to all eating styles. Endless organic and natural meat, vegetarian, vegan and gluten-free choices. Offering super smoothies, fresh extracted juices, espresso and tea. Full bar and house-infused botanical spirits. Open daily 8am for breakfast lunch and dinner. 145 N. Glenwood St., (307) 734-0882, tetonlotuscafe.com.

MANGY MOOSE Mangy Moose Restaurant, with locally sourced, seasonally fresh food at reasonable prices, is a always a fun place to go with family or friends for a unique dining experience. The personable staff will make you feel right at home and the funky western decor will keep you entertained throughout your entire visit. Teton Village, (307) 733-4913, mangymoose.com.

SNAKE RIVER BREWERY & RESTAURANT America’s most award-winning microbrewery is serving lunch and dinner. Take in the atmosphere while enjoying wood-fired pizzas, pastas, burgers, sandwiches, soups, salads and desserts. $9 lunch menu. Happy hour 4 to 6 p.m., including tasty hot wings. The freshest beer in the valley, right from the source! Free WiFi. Open 11:00 a.m. to 11:00 p.m. 265 S. Millward. (307) 739-2337, snakeriverbrewing. com.

SWEETWATER Satisfying locals for lunch and dinner for over 36 years with deliciously affordable comfort food.

Extensive local and regional beer list. Lunch 11:30 a.m. to 2:30 p.m. features blackened trout salad, elk melt, wild west chili and vegetarian specialties. Dinner 5:30 to 9 p.m. including potato-crusted trout, 16 ounce ribeye, vegan and wild game. Reservations welcome. (307) 733-3553. sweetwaterjackson.com.

TRIO Owned and operated by Chefs with a passion for good food, Trio is located right off the Town square in downtown Jackson. Featuring

a variety of cuisines in a relaxed atmosphere, Trio is famous for its wood-oven pizzas, specialty cocktails and waffle fries with bleu cheese fondue. Dinner nightly at 5:30 p.m.

Reservations. (307) 734-8038 or bistrotrio.com.

ITALIAN CALICO A Jackson Hole favorite since 1965, the Calico continues to be one of the most popular restaurants in the Valley. The Calico offers the right combination of really good food, (much of which is grown in our own gardens in the summer), friendly staff; a reasonably priced menu and a large selection of wine. Our bar scene is eclectic with a welcoming vibe. Open nightly at 5 p.m. 2560 Moose Wilson Rd., (307) 733-2460.

MEXICAN EL ABUELITO Serving authentic Mexican cuisine and appetizers in a unique Mexican atmosphere.

Home of the original Jumbo Margarita.

Featuring a full bar with a large selection of authentic Mexican beers. Lunch served weekdays 11 a.m. to 3 p.m. Nightly dinner specials. Open seven days, 11 a.m. to 10 p.m.

385 W. Broadway, (307) 733-1207.

PIZZA DOMINO’S PIZZA Hot and delicious delivered to your door. Handtossed, deep dish, crunchy thin, Brooklyn style and artisan pizzas; bread bowl pastas, and oven baked sandwiches; chicken wings, cheesy breads and desserts. Delivery. 520 S. Hwy. 89 in Kmart Plaza, (307) 733-0330.

PINKY G’S The locals favorite! Voted Best Pizza in Jackson Hole 2012, 2013 and 2014. Seek out this hidden gem under the Pink Garter Theatre for NY pizza by the slice, salads, stromboli’s, calzones and many appetizers to choose from. Try the $7 ‘Triple S’ lunch special.Happy hours 10 p.m. - 12 a.m. Sun.- Thu. Text PINK to 71441 for discounts.

Delivery and take-out. Open daily 11a.m. to 2 a.m. 50 W. Broadway, (307) 734-PINK.

PIZZERIA CALDERA Jackson Hole’s only dedicated stone-hearth oven pizzeria, serving Napolitana-style pies using the freshest ingredients in traditional and creative combinations. Five local micro-brews on tap, a great selection of red and white wines by the glass and bottle, and one of the best views of the Town Square from our upstairs deck. Daily lunch special includes slice, salad or soup, any two for $8. Happy hour: half off drinks by the glass from 4 - 6 daily. Dine in or carry out. Or order online at PizzeriaCaldera. com, or download our app for iOS or Android.

Open from11am - 9:30pm daily at 20 West Broadway. 307-201-1472.

REDNECK PERSPECTIVE SATIRE

Big Bootie Candy One working woman who was somehow excluded from ‘Jackson Hole Women.’

BY CLYDE THORNHILL

“T

he News&Guide is featuring me in their special section ‘Jackson Hole Women,’” Susie told me all excited. “The piece about my nonprofit that works to bring awareness to safety issues surrounding incorrectly installed hamster wheels is on page four.”

“I’m proud of you,” I said. Clearly the reporters hadn’t spent an evening with Susie when she celebrated the equinox with a pagan fertility ritual. What she and her friend Cindy did to me that night, now that’s female accomplishment!

Perhaps unfairly, I began to suspect the NaG’s motives.

After all, women have been accomplishing amazing things since Eve served her husband organic, non-GMO apples, Isabella, Queen of Spain, established the Spanish Inquisition, Mary I of England executed hundreds of protestants and Blythe Masters invented credit default swaps, providing America with a financially-stable housing market during the past decade.

I asked the editorial staff at the NaG why they recognized women in a special issue as if their accomplishments are news and something to be amazed with. They confirmed it

had nothing to do with the thousands of dollars in ad revenue generated by the section during the shoulder season.

In keeping with their altruistic spirit, I recently caught up with Big Bootie Candy, one of Hoback Junction’s most sought-after freelance strippers and talked to her about women in the workplace.

PJH: So Bootie, can you tell us what made you want to start your own business?

Bootie: I always had an entrepreneurial spirit, even as a kid I was always trying to hustle a dollar wherever I could.

I would shoplift candy and sell it to other kids. Later, I dealt pot to neighborhood teens, just a joint here and there, but I got the satisfaction of doing my own thing and not punching a time clock.

PJH: Do you find much sexism in the workplace?

Bootie: As a freelance stripper, I find there is a huge amount of sexism. Men are always gawking at you while you work, as if you are some kind of object and it’s hard to get them to take you seriously as an intellectual equal when you don’t have your clothes on. Sometimes they even try to get a feel when slipping a dollar in your G-string. It’s almost as if they are more concerned with seeing you naked than engaging in stimulating conversation about the national economy or the environment.

PJH: What are some of the challenges that women entrepreneurs face?

Bootie: The price of female lingerie is much more expensive

always the risk of tripping on stiletto heels.

PJH: So what is it like being a female businessperson in Teton County?

Bootie: Despite the difficulties, I love it! There is so much support among businesswomen in the valley. We sustain each other and we try to give back to the female community and help empower the young women who will follow us and become the leaders of tomorrow. PJH

than anything male strippers wear, and of course there is

Vintage Clothing Sale 60s, 70s & 80s

just in time for halloween

567 W. Broadway Look for the balloons!

Dresses, Coats, Tops, Boots, Purses, Jewelry, & more Cash or check only • Prices are as marked

For more info email emsattic22@gmail.com

OCTOBER 21, 2015 | 27

refreshments will be served.

| PLANET JACKSON HOLE |

Oct. 22 & 23, 5-8:00pm Oct. 24, 10-3pm

| PLANET JACKSON HOLE |

28 | OCTOBER 21, 2015

SUDOKU

WINDSHIELDS

Complete the grid so that each row, column, diagonal and 3x3 square contain all of the numbers 1 to 9.

No math is involved. The grid has numbers, but nothing has to add up to anything else. Solve the puzzle with reasoning and logic. Solving time is typically 10 to 30 minutes, depending on your skill and experience.

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L.A.TIMES “NOW YOU SEE IT ...” By Mike Peluso

SUNDAY, OCTOBER 25, 2015

ACROSS

01 Varnish resin 07 Online cash-back deal 012 God for whom Wednesday was named 017 Peru’s El Misti, e.g.

018 Submit servilely 019 Sounded alike 021 Not kosher 022 Coleridge love poem?

024 Problems for parades 025 Nerds 027 Quick way to reduce fat?

028 N.Y. engineering sch.

029 Yen 030 Form 031 NFL great Brown and meteorologist Cantore 032 Bern’s river 033 Fed. benefits agency 034 Knight’s comment when he was mistakenly put in the corner?

037 Words after lost or missed 038 Hardly laid-back 040 La Corse, par exemple 041 Early ascetic 042 “Ain’t gonna happen!”

043 Serious oil problem 046 To’s partner 047 Sun. delivery 048 Sides in a Wells — or Welles — war 049 King of the sea?

052 Workers’ gp. in a 1955 merger 053 Step 054 Easy chore 058 Welcoming rings 060 Actor Kinski 061 Sporty Nissans 063 Lodge letters 064 Sheriff’s assistants 066 Sierra __ 067 Charity’s URL ending 068 North African hops drier?

071 Equilibrium

074 17-Across output 077 1938 broadcaster of Welles radio dramas 078 “Jersey Boys” role 079 Bikini blasts, briefly 080 Like some protein drinks 082 Vocalized “Psst!”

083 Ford flop 084 Maguire of “Spider-Man” 085 Citrus high?

090 Waffle center?

093 Permeate 094 Alternatives to fries 096 Ripley’s closing words 097 GM sticker datum 098 RR stop 099 Celestial sci.

0100 Little burger 0101 Natalie’s “West Side Story” role 0102 Encouraging simian?

0105 How gazelles bound 0107 “Dang!”

0108 Put out 0109 Mistletoe may hang from them 0110 Original environment 0111 Energetic mount 0112 Reliable

DOWN

01 Canine cousins 02 Backtalk in the Everglades?

03 Crime __ 04 Facebook links 05 Like Beethoven’s Symphony No. 7 06 Winter time 07 Port NE of Canton, OH 08 B-47, for one 09 Madison et al.: Abbr.

010 Racer Fabi 011 Diminutive 012 Deli offerings 013 Very 014 Start to function?

015 Dubai-based airline 016 Synthetic used to insulate wet suits 017 Bug 018 Awe-inspiring 020 Kiev’s river 023 Absent-minded Milne title character 026 Immortal first baseman 031 La __: San Diego resort area 032 Intractable beast 034 Apple product 035 Ft. or in.

036 Essential __ 037 In unison 039 Haute couture monogram 041 Composer Satie et al.

042 Free, as a checking account 043 Hall of Fame linebacker Junior 044 Mountain route 045 Where Gubbeen Cheese is made: Abbr.

046 Highway warning 048 Saxony woodland 049 High capital 050 Risky boot camp response 051 BHO’s predecessor 053 Common people 055 John and Peter’s woodwind?

056 Nocturnal Indian primate 057 Powder holders 059 Hero 060 Pink Nintendo icon 061 Ardor 062 Mozart’s “__ fan tutte” 065 Like paint when it’s nearly dry 066 Texter’s guffaw 069 KOA users 070 Sisterhood name

in a Rebecca Wells novel 071 Regs.

072 Radio host John 073 Enzyme ending 074 Mopes 075 What duffers don’t expect to do 076 Hot, hot pepper 079 Gray and tan 081 Coin in Tirana 082 Souped-up cars 086 Like an ideal negotiation 087 Complained 088 Done 089 Sturgeon delicacy 091 Ruffled 092 Renders unproductive?

094 Some NCOs 095 Plains tribe 097 European island nation 099 Have __: lose it 0100 “Adventures in Babysitting” co-star 0101 Cry under a pop-up 0103 Plastic __ Band 0104 Ellipsis element 0106 “Scram, ya varmint!”

WELLNESS COMMUNITY These businesses provide health or wellness services for the Jackson Hole community and its visitors.

ENO CLINIC®

CENTER FOR ADVANCED MEDICINE

Trust The Expert Mark Menolascino

MD, MS, ABIHM, ABAARM, IFMCP

Anti-Aging from the Inside-Out & the Outside-In Deep Tissue Sports Massage Thai Massage Myofascial Release Cupping

Oliver Tripp, NCTM Massage Therapist Nationally Certified

253-381-2838

180 N Center St, Unit 8 Jackson, WY 83001

Physical Therapy • Sports Medicine • Massage • Occupational Therapy • Chinese Medicine • Chiropractic Care • Nutrition • Fitness • Yoga • Acupuncture • Pilates • Personal Training • Mental Health • Energy Therapy • Homeopathy • Aromatherapy • Sound Therapy • Healing Arts Gallery

MenoClinic.com | Wilson, WY

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PERSONALIZED METABOLIC & NUTRITIONAL MEDICINE ANTI-AGING & FUNCTIONAL MEDICINE JAMES RANIOLO, DO • Expert Bio-identical Replacement therapy for men and women • Concierge medical plans and house-calls available • We identify and correct the underlying causes of your symptoms and disease, and often eliminate them Call now to schedule your free 15 minute phone consultation with Dr. Raniolo!

(307)200-4850 | wycoh.com | 1490 Gregory Lane

To advertise in the Wellness Directory, contact Jennifer at Planet Jackson Hole at 307-732-0299 or jmarlatt@planetjh.com

OCTOBER 21, 2015 | 29

120 W PEARL AVENUE • MWWJH.COM • 307.699.7480

732-1039

No physician referral required.

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| PLANET JACKSON HOLE |

Offering integrated health and wellness services for a healthy body, happy mind, & balanced spirit

Thyroid Imbalance Adrenal Fatigue Food Sensitivities Hormone Imbalances Supplements Hyberbarics Wrinkle Reduction Skin Tightening Hair Removal Skin Care Products & More

Professional and Individualized Treatments • Sports/Ortho Rehab • Neck and Back Rehab • Rehabilitative Pilates • Incontinence Training • Pelvic Pain Rehab • Lymphedema Treatments Norene Christensen PT, DSc, OCS, CLT Rebekah Donley PT, DPT, CPI Mark Schultheis PT, CSCS Kim Armington PTA, CPI

| PLANET JACKSON HOLE |

30 | OCTOBER 21, 2015

FREE WILL ASTROLOGY

BY ROB BREZSNY

ARIES (March 21-April 19) According to the online etymological dictionary, the verb “fascinate” entered the English language in the 16th century. It was derived from the Middle French *fasciner* and the Latin *fascinatus,* which are translated as “bewitch, enchant, put under a spell.” In the 19th century, “fascinate” expanded in meaning to include “delight, attract, hold the attention of.” I suspect you will soon have experiences that could activate both senses of “fascinate.” My advice is to get the most out of your delightful attractions without slipping into bewitchment. Is that even possible? It will require you to exercise fine discernment, but yes, it is.

TAURUS (April 20-May 20) One of the largest machines in the world is a “bucket wheel excavator” in Kazakhstan. It’s a saw that weighs 45,000 tons and has a blade the size of a four-story building. If you want to slice through a mountain, it’s perfect for the job. Indeed, that’s what it’s used for over in Kazakhstan. Right now, Taurus, I picture you as having a metaphorical version of this equipment. That’s because I think you have the power to rip open a clearing through a massive obstruction that has been in your way.

GEMINI (May 21-June 20) Filmmaker Alfred Hitchcock did a daily ritual to remind him of life’s impermanence. After drinking his tea each morning, he flung both cup and saucer over his shoulder, allowing them to smash on the floor. I don’t recommend that you adopt a comparable custom for long-term use, but it might be healthy and interesting to do so for now.

Are you willing to outgrow and escape your old containers? Would you consider diverging from formulas that have always worked for you? Are there any unnecessary taboos that need to be broken? Experiment with the possible blessings that might come by not clinging to the illusion of “permanence.”

CANCER (June 21-July 22) Terence was a comic playwright in ancient Rome. He spoke of love in ways that sound modern. It can be capricious and weird, he said. It may provoke indignities and rouse difficult emotions. Are you skilled at debate?

Love requires you to engage in strenuous discussions.

Peace may break out in the midst of war, and vice versa.

Terence’s conclusion: If you seek counsel regarding the arts of love, you may as well be asking for advice on how to go mad. I won’t argue with him. He makes good points. But I suspect that in the coming weeks you will be excused from most of those crazy-making aspects. The sweet and smooth sides of love will predominate. Uplift and inspiration are more likely than angst and bewilderment. Take advantage of the grace period! Put chaos control measures in place for the next time Terence’s version of love returns.

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22) In the coming weeks, you will have a special relationship with the night. When the sun goes down, your intelligence will intensify, as will your knack for knowing what’s really important and what’s not. In the darkness, you will have an enhanced capacity to make sense of murky matters lurking in the shadows. You will be able to penetrate deeper than usual, and get to the bottom of secrets and mysteries that have kept you off-balance. Even your grimy fears may be transformable if you approach them with a passion for redemption.

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22) New friends and unexpected teachers are in your vicinity, with more candidates on the way. There may even be potential comrades who could eventually become flexible collaborators and catalytic guides. Will you be available for the openings they offer? Will you receive them with fire in your heart and mirth in your eyes? I worry that you may not be ready if you are too preoccupied with old friends and familiar teachers. So please make room for surprises.

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22)

More than any other sign, you have an ability to detach yourself from life’s flow and analyze its complexities with cool objectivity. This is mostly a good thing. It enhances your power to make rational decisions. On the other hand, it sometimes devolves into a liability. You may become so invested in your role as observer that you refrain from diving into life’s flow. You hold yourself apart from it, avoiding both its messiness and vitality. But I don’t foresee this being a problem in the coming weeks. In fact, I bet you will be a savvy watcher even as you’re almost fully immersed in the dynamic flux.

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21) Are you an inventor? Is it your specialty to create novel gadgets and machines? Probably not. But in the coming weeks you may have metaphorical resemblances to an inventor. I suspect you will have an enhanced ability to dream up original approaches and find alternatives to conventional wisdom. You may surprise yourself with your knack for finding ingenious solutions to long-standing dilemmas. To prime your instincts, I’ll provide three thoughts from inventor Thomas Edison. 1) “To invent, you need a good imagination and a pile of junk.” 2) “Just because something doesn’t do what you planned it to do doesn’t mean it’s useless.” 3) “Everything comes to those who hustle while they wait.”

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21) Some unraveling is inevitable. What has been woven together must now be partially unwoven. But please refrain from thinking of this mysterious development as a setback. Instead, consider it an opportunity to reexamine and redo any work that was a bit hasty or sloppy. Be glad you will get a second chance to fix and refine what wasn’t done quite right the first time. In fact, I suggest you preside over the unraveling yourself. Don’t wait for random fate to accomplish it. And for best results, formulate an intention to regard everything that transpires as a blessing.

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19) “A waterfall would be more impressive if it flowed the other way,” said Irish author Oscar Wilde. I appreciate the wit, but don’t agree with him. A plain old ordinary waterfall, with foamy surges continually plummeting over a precipice and crashing below, is sufficiently impressive for me. What about you, Capricorn? In the coming days, will you be impatient and frustrated with plain old ordinary marvels and wonders? Or will you be able to enjoy them just as they are?

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18) Years ago, I moved into a rental house with my new girlfriend, whom I had known for six weeks. As we fell asleep the first night, a song played in my head: “Nature’s Way,” by the band Spirit. I barely knew it and had rarely thought of it before. And yet there it was, repeating its first line over and over: “It’s nature’s way of telling you something’s wrong.” Being a magical thinker, I wondered if my unconscious mind was telling me a secret about my love. But I rejected that possibility; it was too painful to contemplate.

When we broke up a few months later, however, I wished I had paid attention to that early alert. I mention this, Aquarius, because I suspect your unconscious mind will soon provide you with a wealth of useful information, not just through song lyrics but other subtle signals, as well. Listen up! At least some of it will be good news, not cautionary like mine.

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20) When I advise you to GET NAKED, I don’t mean it in a literal sense. Yes, I will applaud if you’re willing to experiment with brave acts of self-revelation. I will approve of you taking risks for the sake of the raw truth. But getting arrested for indecent exposure might compromise your ability to carry out those noble acts. So, no, don’t actually take off all your clothes and wander through the streets. Instead, surprise everyone with brilliant acts of surrender and vulnerability. Gently and sweetly and poetically tell the Purveyors of Unholy Repression to take their boredom machine and shove it up their humdrum.

Go to RealAstrology.com for Rob Brezsny’s expanded weekly audio horoscopes and daily text-message horoscopes. Audio horoscopes also available by phone at 877-873-4888 or 900-950-7700.

Contagious Medicine Laughing for no reason has many health benefits.

T

here’s some good news for all of us who suffer from the epidemic of taking ourselves too seriously. We all have a natural built-in antidote that opens the heart, releases stress, positively stimulates the immune system, and breaks up negativity. It’s called laughter.

I am sure you’ve had the experience in a group of friends where someone says something that strikes you as funny, and then more people start to laugh and soon everyone starts to laugh. Then, listening to everyone giggling keeps the laughter going for no reason — the “you might pee your pants” kind of laughter. When I was a kid, my brothers and I would often get into contagious fits of laughter at dinner, which went on and on, and usually got us removed from the table. This kind of spontaneous, long-lasting laughter turns out to be amazingly therapeutic.

No joke The beauty of pure, spontaneous laughter for no reason is that it bypasses the mind altogether — it’s pure joy.

This is different from laughing when you are telling or responding to a joke, because a joke requires the intellect in order to follow the story and get the punch line (and not everyone gets the punch line, anyway). This is also not about laughter stimulated by meanness or veiled hostility.

Research Scientists have researched and compiled a long list of benefits for extended laughter, including that it • Boosts the immune system and the circulatory system • Increases oxygen intake • Stimulates and strengthens the heart and lungs • Triggers the release of endorphins (the body’s natural positive mood enhancer and painkiller) • Improves alertness, memory and creativity (For more, check out the movie “Laughology,” which you can find online.)

Laughter yoga To enjoy the scientifically proven health benefits of laughter, we need to laugh for at least for 10 to 15 minutes. Since this doesn’t happen spontaneously every day, there is the relatively new practice of Laughter Yoga (Hasyayoga), which is done with a lot of playfulness in a group. The teacher starts it off with forced laughter, and it quickly turns into genuinely contagious laughter for everyone.

Even businesses are getting into the act of offering Laughter Yoga to employees because it has been shown to not only improve people’s moods, but also to measurably increase their on-the-job productivity. There are formal and informal laughter yoga groups and clubs around the world. Some meet every morning, laugh it up, practice some yogic breathing exercises and then head off to the rest of their day in great spirits.

Spiritual benefit Whether in a yoga group or spontaneously with friends, laughter for no reason does at least one more important thing — it brings us right into the present moment and stimulates the best kind of happiness with no reason at all. PJH

Carol Mann is a longtime Jackson resident, radio personality, former Grand Targhee Resort owner, author, and clairvoyant.

Got a Cosmic Question? Email carol@yourcosmiccafe.com

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D A D RLY BIR SC Member A E m Card.

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For more info visit

jhskiclub.org/skiswap or call

307-733-6433