Denver Herald Dispatch 1231

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December 31, 2020

DENVER, COLORADO

A publication of

VOLUME 94 | ISSUE 8

For family, mental health difficulties aren’t just about 2020 Year of powerlessness adds to longstanding problems that must be navigated BY TINA GRIEGO COLORADO NEWS COLLABORATIVE

They love each other. That should go without saying. They have, in fact, gone through hell and back for one another — and that was before 2020 rolled out its string of gut-twisting, sleep-depriving upheavals. Still, Janay Barfoot will be the first to say that hers is a difficult family and this year has tested them all. Difficult as in a 20-year-old who has autism as well as a heart condition and bipolar disorder. He has been hospitalized on and off over the last eight years because he’s been a danger to himself and others. This 6-foot-5, 250-pound child of hers, who still wants to cuddle, whose goofy smile blazes with innocence, now spends too many of his days playing video games in his basement room. His voice ricochets through the house, and all Barfoot can think is that she wants a better life for him than this. Difficult as in a 14-year-old who started her freshman year online and who aches for connection, but who keeps her computer camera off when she can during online classes. She is smart and cracks up the family with her quick wit, but fears that the curious eyes of her classmates also may be judging eyes and she is certain she does not measure up. Depression stalks her. Difficult as in Barfoot having decided to stay home after the pandemic struck because she has an autoimmune disorder and felt unsafe in the surgery center where she worked intake and billing. Quitting that job means her husband’s job at the water company is their sole income.

Janay Barfoot, 53, of Lakewood, talks with her 20-year-old son and 14-year-old daughter at their home recently. Barfoot decided to stay home after the pandemic set in because she has an autoimmune disorder and felt unsafe in the surgery center where she worked intake and billing, and to help her two struggling children cope with multiple issues and online school challenges despite PHOTO BY MARC PISCOTTY battling depression herself.

One income means less income and more stress. Their Lakewood home feels as though it is shrinking around her. “Everything seems to be a battle,” she says. Barfoot, who is 53, also grapples with depression. She regularly sees a therapist through the Jefferson

INSIDE: VOICES: PAGE 4 | LIFE: PAGE 8 | CALENDAR: PAGE 9

Center for Mental Health. “(My therapist) has always told me to think about it as being on an airplane,” she says. “They tell you to put on your oxygen mask first.” You would have thought, Barfoot says, that a life punctuated by the

CALL FOR HELP Whatever you are going through, crisis counselors and professionally trained peer specialists are available to help. Call the Colorado Crisis Service hotline at 1-844-493-TALK (8255). There is no wrong reason to reach out.

SEE FAMILY, P2

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