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Networker

Newsletter of Catholic Charities North Dakota Volume 27, Issue 1 Spring 2013

Our Journey to Emme Our journey to our youngest daughter, Emme, began weaving its way into my heart in the fall of 2010 when I began reading Choosing To SEE: A Journey Of Struggle And Hope by Mary Beth Chapman. The story of Mary Beth and Steven Curtis Chapman, a Christian singer/songwriter, was full of the heartache and grief they experienced after losing one of their daughters in a tragic accident. She had been born in China and after their loss, they began to feel that God wanted them to care for the orphans in China. Maria’s Big House of Hope opened its doors in Luoyang, Henan, China in July of 2009, to help house some of the most medically vulnerable orphans in the area. Little did I know as I began reading this book that God was working to open my heart. Little did I know that Maria’s Big House of Hope would play such an important role in our lives, or that Emme’s grafting into our hearts was just beginning.

People often ask if we planned to have seven children; the answer is a definite no. We never planned to have such a

by

Melissa Smith

large family, but I am learning that where we place a period, God has often placed a comma. The furthest thing from our minds in the fall of 2010 was adding another child to our family. We had six children! We had no more room at the Inn! Or in our vehicles!

Christmas was fast approaching and amidst the busyness that can come with the holidays, I could not shake a heaviness and urgency in my heart for the orphaned. There are an estimated 147 million orphans worldwide. There are many boys and girls in China with minor to severe medical needs waiting for families and I began to feel as if we had another daughter in China waiting for us to find her. Of course I also felt that these thoughts were crazy and I was not about to share them out loud with anyone. But when I could not dismiss the feelings any longer, I shared them with my husband. Two weeks later he asked our oldest daughter if she wanted a sister.

On February 3, 2011 I went to an adoption agency’s website and for the first time saw the precious face of Dang Qing Fei. She had been born in Luoyang, China, was two and a half years old, had been treated surgically for a large nevus (a mole or lesion) on her scalp, and she needed a family. She did not do well after her surgery and was sent to Maria’s House of Hope where they could better care for her needs; the facility had only recently opened its doors. That fall as I was reading Choosing to See, our Emme was at the very facility I was reading about. Oh yes, God is in the details! We began the process to adopt her on February 7, 2011.

Almost a year after seeing Emme’s face for the first time, I travelled to China with a good friend. On January 9, 2012, a brave, beautiful and tiny little girl walked into an unheated, very cold government office in Zhengzou, China.

There are no words to adequately describe

Melissa meets Emme for the first time.

EMME continued on page 7

P e g o n i ple, Ch p l . e H es an g i n g Li v

Board of Directors

Bishop David Kagan, President Brian Herding, Chair - Grafton Jerome Clark, Vice-Chairman-Minot Mary Ann Votava, Secretary-Grand Forks Jim Laske, Treasurer - Fargo Rev. Msgr. Dennis Skonseng - Valley City

Liaison to Bishop David Kagan Joyce McDowall - Bismarck

Liaison to Bishop David Kagan Lynn Davis, Belcourt Sr. Maura DeCrans, PBVM, Fargo Kaylin Frappier, Fargo L. Joe Fry, Fargo Rev. William Gerlach, Oakes John Hardy, Rolla Agnes Harrington, Fargo Christopher Johnson, Fargo Aaron Krauter, West Fargo Deacon Doyle Schulz, Bismarck Thomas Vanorny, Oakes Diane Weir, Medora Deacon Bob Zent, Dickinson

Interim Executive Director Kaylin Frappier

Board Members Emeriti Tim Allmaras Toni Betting Sr. Lois Byrne Leon Comeau Deacon Ed Didier Sr. Joanne Graham Rev. Thomas Graner Michael Hagstrom Monica Hannan Kathy Hogan Betty Keegan Kate Kenna Jaselta Lorenz Sonia Lunardi Jim Lyons

Galen Mack Teresa Martinez-Gravelin Victor Mathern Fr. Bernie Pfau Sharon Pollard Diane Roller Leo Schmidt Deacon Conrad Schuster Mary Ann Schuster Jerome Schwartzenberger Cameron Sillers Sr. Suzanne Stahl Dr. Shantell Two Bears Msgr. Wendelyn Vetter

The Networker is published twice a year by Catholic Charities North Dakota.

Catholic Charities North Dakota is an Equal Opportunity Employer.

1-800-450-4457 www.CatholicCharitiesND.org two

A View of the Domestic Church

Brian Herding Chairman Board of Directors

Most of my days are spent in the eastern half of North Dakota. It is where I grew up and my family resides. Thus, I consider it a wonderful treat when I get the opportunity to head west each May for our Board meeting in Bismarck, especially because of two families whom I treasure as beautiful faith-filled friends.

One family lives in Bismarck and one in Beulah.

During that May meeting I always set aside some extra days to visit these families. These visits are a time when I truly witness why Pope John Paul II referred to the family as the Domestic Church. He did so because it is the first place where we meet our Heavenly Father. Both of these families have shown me this when I joined in their day-to-day activities and then a time of nightly prayer. That gift these parents are sharing with their children is not as common as it should be in our country today. Yet it is the one thing that keeps us glued together.

Many of the people coming to Catholic Charities are doing so because of a place that is broken in their lives. They need help overcoming a difficulty through counseling. Children who have difficult backgrounds need new faith-filled families where they can experience God. Some just need a caring presence to show them God’s compassion through our Guardianship Services. May we, through Catholic Charities, build better families touching one heart at a time!

Farewell and Thank you!

There is a time for all things and I have decided it is time for me to retire as Executive Director for Catholic Charities North Dakota. Over the last three plus years we have seen some changes, such as an improved web site and exciting fund raising events. The real important accomplishment is that we have continued to provide services each and every day through Pregnancy, Parenting and Adoption Services, Counseling Services, Guardianship Services, the Adults Adopting Special Kids (AASK) program, and when needed, Disaster Response Services. The dedicated staff and board members of Catholic Charities North Dakota continue to amaze me with their compassion, their integrity and their commitment to the Mission of Catholic Charities North Dakota.

I have been blessed and fortunate to have played a small part in the history of this agency and the great work being done. I thank you all and wish only the best for the staff, board, and supporters of Catholic Charities North Dakota.

God bless you, one and all. Larry Bernhardt

Interim Director Appointed

Kaylin Frappier, Chairman of the Human Resource Committee of the Board of Directors, has been named the Interim Director of Catholic Charities North Dakota. A Search Committee has been formed to facilitate the hiring of a new Executive Director.

Reynie-A Successful Young Man Reynie began life in Sierra Leone, a country in Western Africa, when it was riddled with civil war. His family experienced the brutality of war, so six year old, orphaned Reynie was brought to a refugee camp in 1998. He came to the United States a year later and was placed in a foster home, where he remained until he was 20 years old. Time was running out; once he became 21 years old, he would no longer qualify for foster care.

Reynie has developmental disabilities, and Guardianship Services with Catholic Charities North Dakota were established in June 2011 to help him make future decisions, such as residential and vocational choices. Major responsibilities of his Guardianship Worker were to help him go through the US citizenship process, enabling him to receive Social Security benefits; choosing an agency to provide support for him and selecting a residential setting within the agency; and finding employment. This would allow him to pay the agency which provides support for him, his rent and personal expenses.

All of this had to happen before he turned 21, and would need to move out of foster care. There were many delays and setbacks in his citizenship journey, but finally an interviewer came from Minneapolis and he was able to pass that hurdle, as well as receiving a medical waiver which allowed him to take a shorter citizenship test. In September 2012, his Guardianship Worker and Case Manager traveled to Grand Forks and watched Reynie state the oath to become a US citizen, an inspiration for all. As a new citizen, he was proud to take part in the presidential election in November 2012, after researching candidates and attending voter education forums.

In the fall, he moved into an apartment, using some grant money for transition services to help pay rent until his benefits finally came. Sharing an apartment with other young men was a new experience for him and he quickly accepted the responsibilities and challenges of being more independent.

He helped with the cleaning chores, and developed a new skill—cooking. Previously only knowing how to heat food up in the microwave, we now see him grocery shopping and making lasagna!

Reynie also goes to work each day, employed with a local training center for individuals with developmental disabilities where he learns a variety of work skills. He enjoys the work, socialization, as well as the paycheck.

He also is making choices many young adults need to make. One example is that he wanted to participate in Special Olympics basketball, however, practice was on Wednesday evenings. He has church on Wednesday evenings and he made the choice to continue to attend his church those evenings.

In January, Reynie approached his Guardian asking her to call the pastor at his church since he wanted to be baptized.

She did so, and the date for baptism was set. The pastor stated that Reynie was one of the “best people I’ve ever met.”

Reynie was baptized with full immersion at his church, and afterwards was asked if he wanted to say anything. With a smile that covered his whole face, he said “God has blessed me.” Everyone witnessing the baptism in that small, joy-filled church felt blessed to witness such an awesome spiritual event.

Margaret commented, “Going through the challenges and struggles to help this young man move forward in his life, through all the choices and setbacks, as well as the medical concerns, and still see his smile and courage to face each situation was an honoring experience. It was a testament of faith, knowing his background and seeing his acceptance and strength, I just really had to trust that God was involved in this young man’s life and we would see fruition. His ever constant smile is witness of the joy and trust of his faith.”

Margaret Rundlett-Doom Guardianship Worker

Mission Statement Guided by our values, Catholic Charities North Dakota serves people in need and advocates for the common good of all. three

Creating a “Win-Win Strategy” in Your Marriage and Family We are a nation which has focused on the rights of individual people. This has certainly been helpful in many arenas but at times this pursuit may be harmful to several of the most important units in our society: couples and families.

As a therapist whose practice includes couples and families, I have noticed that the “me and my” attitude of our culture often creeps into marriage and family life. When John and Jane Doe re q u e s t e d counseling they stated “we are fighting all the time and it is beginning to affect our children.”

John and Jane have been married a few years and have two young children. During our first session, both talked about the fact that their arguments are often about the same things and that they can’t seem to resolve them. I introduced the idea of “Fair Fighting Rules” to them during our second session. This is a list that I have compiled over the years from a variety of sources.

Rule #1: Accept that fighting (disagreeing) is often natural and normal in relationships. It’s HOW we fight that may get us off track. It also needs to be understood that fighting or arguing needs to be done in an atmosphere of respect; no name calling, belittling, sarcasm, blaming accusing and NEVER, NEVER, should there be any form of aggressive physical contact.

Rule #2: Fight to reach a solution, not to gain a victory.

John and Jane agreed that each had gotten into the mentality that if they compromised the other person was “winning.” I encourage couples to reframe these thoughts into how the relationship can “win” rather than placing themselves first.

This only works if each person in the coupleship is willing to commit to these principles.

Rule #3: Fight about one thing at a time. Too often when arguing, couples allow things to pile up and when four

disagreements start on one thing, the argument slips into the other issues, even things from past, and it becomes a spiral of arguing that can quickly spin out of control. Both individuals need to make the commitment to stick to one thing at a time.

Rule #4: Speak for yourself and use “I” statements. “I” statements consist of taking responsibility for your feelings and sharing them honestly and directly. For example “I feel frustrated when I’m making dinner and need to attend to our children while you just watch TV.” It is important for the other person to listen attentively and reflect what they’ve heard to make sure they understand. John and Jane agreed that they were often thinking ahead to their own defensive response rather than truly listening to their partner’s concerns. The act of listening attentively in and of itself is a powerful way to reduce frustration and show genuine concern for our partner.

Rule #5: Remember to ask for and receive forgiveness on an ongoing basis. There is a forgiveness exercise I like to use which helps the couple to genuinely heal, even from those hurts and resentments that have been held onto for years.

This exercise includes coming up with a list of 5 things that each person has done to cause damage in words and actions.

Each partner takes the time to search their hearts and when they ask for forgiveness, it means they are committed to not doing the behavior again. Forgiveness is a conscious choice and then an act. When a hurt has been forgiven, each partner needs to work on letting it go. The couple then proceeds to share one thing at a time, often taking turns sharing what they want forgiveness for until they have completed their list. When this exercise is done thoughtfully, and at a time when the couple is encouraged by better communication and some resolution of issues they have been fighting over, it is a powerful healing tool.

The Fair Fighting Rules are especially effective for parents who have teenagers in their home. If it seems difficult to put these rules into place in your marriage or in your home, the counselors at Catholic Charities are available to assist you and would welcome the opportunity to be a part of creating a more peaceful environment for you and your family.

Janelle Miedema, LICSW Director of Counseling

The On-going Effects of Trauma When told a teen-age neighbor boy was going to baby-sit her, nine-year old Francis began to ‘act out’ yelling that she didn’t want him to be her baby-sitter, crying uncontrollably, begging her mom to not leave that evening. Her mom cancelled plans and took the time to explore with Francis what had prompted her reaction, eventually learning that the boy tried to get her alone and often tried to touch her inappropriately at those times. She felt uncomfortable and fearful and didn’t want to be around him.

This scenario is an example of trauma and how it could have a profound effect on a child’s behaviors, feelings, and view of the world. A traumatic event is different from regular stress. Traumatic stress threatens the child’s physical safety or the physical safety of someone important in the child’s life. A traumatic event can cause an overwhelming sense of terror, helplessness, and horror. The body reacts to the threat by increasing heart rate, shakiness, dizziness, rapid breathing, release of stress hormones like adrenaline and cortisol, and loss of control of the bowel or bladder.

Examples of acute, or one time, trauma may be being in a car accident, witnessing or being a victim of violence, experiencing a natural disaster like a tornado or flood, seeing a loved one die, or undergoing a physical or sexual assault.

Trauma is considered chronic when a child experiences traumatic events over a period of time: recurrent abuse, domestic violence. Children who experience recurring trauma may become more and more overwhelmed by each event and become more and more convinced that the world is not a safe place.

Neglect means that a child’s basic needs go unmet. This can be traumatic in itself, but also opens the door for other types of trauma to impact the child. Many, if not most of the children we work with in the Adults Adopting Special Kids (AASK) program have experienced some type of trauma.

There is growing evidence to suggest that trauma can negatively affect a child’s healthy physical and psychological development; it literally can change how the brain develops and functions. Children who have survived trauma may have

difficulty trusting other people, feeling safe, understanding and managing their emotions, adjusting and responding to life’s changes, and physically and emotionally adapting to stress. Children who have experienced trauma may overreact to everyday stressors due to their chronically elevated levels of stress hormones, their expectation that the world is not a safe place, and that they can be traumatized at any time.

A caring, loving adult who can provide safety, reassurance, guidance, and protection can help a child recover from trauma.

The adult will understand that often the behaviors make sense in light of the child’s traumatic history, that the child’s reactions to trauma are a normal function of the brain protecting the child from danger. A safe, loving, predictable environment can help children recover from trauma by helping them feel safe, capable, and lovable. As birth, foster, and adoptive parents we can play an important role in helping our kids develop resilience so that they may fully engage in their life and work towards realizing their potential.

For more information, go to the National Child Traumatic Stress Network, www.NCTSN.org to explore topics related to trauma, treatment, and services.

Christine Martin Director, AASK

Run for a Reason

Make your miles meaningful at any of the Fargo Marathon Races: Kids, 5K, 10K, Half, Full, or Relay Marathon.

As a GoFar participant you will receive a Limited Edition Official 2013 Fargo Marathon Poster as well as a short sleeve training shirt with our Catholic Charities North Dakota logo! This is a fun way to raise funds for Catholic Charities. To sign up go to www.CatholicCharitiesND.org and follow the link, or contact Colleen Hardy at (701) 235-4457. five

P & Q Auction a Success!

Catholic Charities North Dakota’s Purse & Quilt and more…Auction, was held on Monday, April 8, at the Fargo Hilton Garden Inn. This sold out event hosted over 225 guests and offered 165 live and silent auction items.

The event raised more than $22,000 in support of Catholic Charities’ Pregnancy, Parenting and Adoption Services.

The evening began with silent auction bidding during the wine and appetizer social, followed by welcoming remarks from Kaylin Frappier, Interim Executive Director. Taryn, an adoptive birth mother, shared her story before the live auction kicked off.

Forty quilts, created with love and generously donated, were sold as well as forty-one fun and unique purses and handbags through live and silent bidding. Additionally there were weekend trips to Medora, North Dakota, and Deadwood, South Dakota, a beautiful handmade hardwood rocking motorcycle, Minnesota Twins and Vikings autographed merchandise, restaurant and service certificates and gift baskets filled with assorted delights.

There was truly something for everyone.

Next year’s Purse & Quilt and more…Auction is scheduled for Monday, April 7, 2014; please make sure to reserve your ticket early for this popular event. To make a cash or in-kind donation, please contact Sarah Ries at sries@CatholicCharitiesND.org. We look forward to seeing you there!

Thank you

to the North Dakota Notre Dame Alumni Group for selecting Catholic Charities North Dakota as the recipient of the proceeds from the two Notre Dame Glee Club Concerts in Fargo and Bismarck on March 11th and 12th. The concerts performed by this enthusiastic and talented group of young men were fantastic! In Fargo the concert was held at Sts. Anne and Joachim Catholic Church and in Bismarck the event was held at the University of Mary. The alumni group worked to secure donations to pay for transportation, meals and found volunteers to house the men in each location. Over $4,000 was donated to Catholic Charities North Dakota as a result of their outstanding efforts. Thank you so much!! six

Emme

from page 1

the emotions of seeing a child you have prayed and ached to hold for so many months. There were nine other families in that government office meeting their sons and daughters for the first time.

To w i t n e s s these families come together is a beautiful moment that

will forever be etched in my heart.

When I saw Emme , I noticed a softball sized mass that was under her scalp. This was something we had not been told about and had not been prepared for. So many fears and doubts filled my mind as we finished up the process in China to bring her home. Shortly after coming home, Emme went to a Children’s Hospital where tests indicated she had a very

aggressive malignancy. Within a month my emotions had gone from great joy at meeting our daughter for the first time to the devastating news she had cancer.

This mass was so destructive it had eaten holes through her skull and was pressing on her brain. She had surgery to remove the back of her skull and to remove the mass. The neurosurgeon was only able to remove 75% of the mass.

We returned home with little Emme in a helmet she had to wear twenty four hours a day. The tissue was sent to many pathologists throughout the nation who said they had never seen anything like it. Finally a nevus expert in California indicated he thought it was a Blue Nevus and not a malignancy.

We have many friends, family and strangers praying for Emme’s healing. She recently had an MRI that showed the mass has not grown; she will have a plate surgically placed in her skull this summer. While there are still unknowns we are so thankful to God for His mighty hand which has been at work in Emme’s life.

Emme has transitioned into our family seamlessly. She has the sweetest, gentlest little spirit and you can not be in her presence for long without falling in love with her! All of us adore her. I’m so thankful we listened to that whisper from God. We said yes to a little girl on the other side of the world who has forever changed our hearts and home.

Intercountry Adoption: How does it happen?

Each year Catholic Charities North Dakota completes many intercountry adoptions such as Emme’s. Catholic Charities North Dakota is the only Hague Certified adoption agency in the state of North Dakota. The Hague Convention was instituted to provide safe guards in adoption to ensure the best interest of children are being served.

Catholic Charities North Dakota provides home study and post placement services for families seeking an intercountry adoption. We have a list of “networking” agencies that we collaborate with through which families receive placement. Families can also identify a placing/networking agency prior to beginning their home study process. We help families adopt from any country in the world that allows for intercountry adoption with the United States. Most of the families we work with adopt through China, Ethiopia, and Korea.

Once the home study is completed by Catholic Charities North Dakota, the family waits for a referral from their placing/networking agency. After the referral has been accepted, the family travels to the country of their child’s origin for placement. Upon returning home, Catholic Charities provides post placement services to the family for as long as is required by the placing country.

For more information about intercountry adoptions, please contact me at cgaddie@catholiccharitiesnd.org or call me at (701) 235-4457.

Carly Gaddie Director Pregnancy, Parenting and Adoption Services

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Tribute and Memorial Gift In Memory of By Helen Neameyer Karen Groth Pam Grant Rev. Gerald McCarthy The Faithful Departed Deb and Deacon Ed McCarthy Jean Cossette Suzanne and Alan Netzer Vincent L. Steffan Karen and Michael Grosz Matt E. Grosz Karen and Michael Grosz Sharon Clancy Margaret and Lloyd Thilmony Ramona Kautzman Margaret and Lloyd Thilmony Gereld “Bus” Didier Margaret and Lloyd Thilmony Esther Hovda Margaret and Lloyd Thilmony Dr. Robert Thomsen Margaret and Lloyd Thilmony Juanita Schmitz Mark Schmitz Dale Klinger Diane and Howard Trapp Fr. Richard Gross Mavis and Harley Jundt Olga Larson Lori and John Grommesh Margaret Howden Lori and John Grommesh Kathleen Lebrun Frances and Robert Lebrun Frances Hitz Dave Lill Barbara Schuster Dave Lill Lavonne Schaefer Dave Lill Joseph Binfet Jackie and Doug Wolfe Michael A. Smith Marion M. Smith Jerome Gernand Marion M. Smith Walter Gernand, Jr. Marion M. Smith Francis A. Jacobs Dorothy C. Jacobs My Parents Ruth Dosch Helen Hertz Ronda and Rick Hertz Adeline and Walter Stibbe Kathy Quaife Alva Schroeder Fr. Tim Schroeder Barbara Schroeder Fr. Tim Schroeder Mom and Dad Antoinette Larson Mr. and Mrs. Albert Miller John L. Miller Peter C. Bosch Anonymous Daniel J. Klein, Jr. Anonymous Rita Mae Koster Maria and Richard Regner Baby Schneider Arlene Schneider Robert E. Stahl Florence Stahl Dean Calkins Anna Calkins My deceased family members Fr. Duaine Cote Terry Mathern Victor Mathern Marie and John Kramer Jenny and Dave Kramer Marlene Putz Anna M. Welder Peter Welder Anna M. Welder Joe Diepolder Dora I. Diepolder Bill Turno Dora I. Diepolder Leone and Oscar Wold Alice and Don Such Erma and Barney Such Alice and Don Such Our parents Candace and Hero Barth My wife, Odell Arthur Mildenberger Lucy and Leonard Rebenitsch Mary Rebenitsch Rose and Nick Heinz Lillian and Ray Seifert Emma and William Seifert Lillian and Ray Seifert John LaMontagne Lillian and Ray Seifert Msgr. Anthony R. Peschel Cathy A. Duffy Frances and Bernard Crummy Katie and Jeff Anderson Dorothy A. Bittner Board and Staff of Catholic Charities North Dakota Jean Kosior Amanda and Kyle Kosior Anita Anderson Celinda and Rodger Wetzel LCDR William Muscha Carol and Robert Muscha Betty and Harold Olschlager Karen and Doug Olschlager Doris Langowski Stanley Langowski Mary Gette Dixie Davis Evelyn and Carl Haberman Mary and Roger Haberman Regina and Vincent Seefeld LaVerne Seefeld Rose and Nick Heinz Leone and Loren Kramer Robert “Buba” Jochum Leroy Jochum

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Rose and Harry Kostelecky Darrell Herman Helen and Frank Jorda Jessican Allmendinger Strommen Armand Andersen Margaret Kouba Ferry Marguerite Samuel Joann Frappier Barbara and Aloysius Gabrysh Petrita and Romeo Dime Leone Clarens Hazell Carlson Rusty Keller Rita Zimprich Veronica Gregoire Jane and Camillo Bologna Harley Smith Janet Uline Mary Votava Carlo DiMascio Dolores and Robert Pacella Diane Marthaler

Larry Kostelecky Dorothy and Edward Herman Margaret and Norm Mezey Diane Allmendinger Mary Jo and Jens Andersen Anonymous Agnes J. Brandt Terri and Kaylin Frappier Mary and Ralph Gabrysh Roanne and Dubert Guerrero Diann Hoedl Diann Hoedl Allison Keller Patricia Kleven Valerie Krogstad Dana Leopold Dawn Smith Deacon Jim Uline Kristen Votava David Pacella David Pacella Scott Marthaler

In Honor of By Amanda Sem Trich Heck Amanda Sem Sonja McLean Lucas McCroskey Lori Grommesh Sharon Maier Carly and Chris Gaddie Michael Nadine and Duane Bartak Dr. and Mrs. Tom Hogan Shirley and Dennis Hogan Fr. Chris Walker Grace J. Fisher My adopted children Eileen Skowronek Peter Edwards, for his many

years of service Gena and Trevor Borgmeier Tahnee and Greg Miller Jeremy Zerr Alice L. Lessard Jane and David Lessard Fay and Gerald Behm Gloria and Harley Schmidt Fr. Paul Becker Karen daSilva Our Granchildren Joan and Peter Edwards PBVM Sisters Fr. John Evans Msgr. Val Gross Susan and Michael Hill Fr. James Cheney Miracle Hoff Michele Erickson Sarah and John Ries Sarah and Charles Mary Ann and Cy Votava Our Parents Judi and Robert Wilmot Jesus Thomas Miller In Appreciation of Peter Edwards and Mary Jo Andersen Patty Robinson Our two adopted children The work of the Agency staff Adoption of Michael Adoption of Matthew Jochum All of our grandchildren Priests of Fargo Diocese Fr. Peter Hughes

By

Kathleen Schmaltz Jeanne and Brian Masseth Sharon and Larry Steffan Roberta and Richard Johnson Sharon and Jim Eversik Leroy Jochum Judy and Merton Beaudrie Susan and Mark Hoffert Bernadette and George Lies

In Behalf of Jennine & Ben Seitz &Family

By Shirley Wilson

In memory of and in honor of By SGM. Lester R. & LaVerne Fulcomer III Vicki Helfrich

With Great Appreciation On behalf of the many people whose lives are touched and restored by our services made possible because of your generosity, we thank you for joining us in “Helping People, Changing Lives.” We are blessed to have your support!

Gifts were given from October 1, 2012 through March 31, 2013.

Patricia Adams John Aftem Ryan Albrecht Rev. Michael A. Alfano Maria Alfonseca Cubero Alterations by L Betty and Vince Ament Chip Ammerman Kathy Anderson Zane Anderson Esther and Roger Anderson Brian Anderson Dennis Anderson Dallas Anderson Ms. Donna M. Anderson JoAnn and Leland Arends Mike Arlien Fr. Thaines Arulandu David Ashley Kenneth Astrup Marjory and Myron Atkinson Jerome Aune Karen Baeth Randy Baggenstoss Susan and Jerome Bailey Mrs. Marion Baker Scott Bakke Jeff Balentine Ronald Balkowitsch Gary Ballard Shirley Ann Barseth Dennis Beaudoin Mac Beaudry Bell State Bank and Trust Perry Bender Gerald Bengs Leroy Benson Jan and Michael Benson Eleanor and Laverne Berg Daniel Berg Rev. Daniel J. Berg Barbara and Larry Bernhardt Carroll and Ken Berntson Michelle and Jayme Berube Dolores Bianco Denise Bickel Leigh Bieber Gary Bilden LeAnne Bills Zaundra Bina Curtis Binstock

John Birkbeck Kyle Bishop Marilyn and Mark Bittner Heidi and Dean Bittner Fr. Al Bitz Joan and Curt Bjertness David Boehm Michael Boehmer Barb and Paul Boesl Philip Bohl Margaret and Jim Borkowski Larry Borud Leon Borud Arlo Borud Mike Bosch Gene Boschee Dennis Bower Bill Brady Leann Brandt Luke Braun James Braun Fr. H. Gerard Braun Bernice and Robert Braun Karen and Ken Braun Laura and Todd Braun Jody Braunberger Breadsmith Breanna & Tim Breidenbach Amy Briol Scott Brochow Doris & Gib Bromenschenkel Jackie Brookins Fr. Bud Brooks Joanne Brown Mike Brunner Richard Bubach Barbara and Arnold Buhr Lynette Bunn Floyd Burckhard Phyllis and Mike Burckhard Mr. and Mrs. C. Burke Terry Burud James Busch Phillip Busch Heather and Dan Butler Donna and Buzz Byzewski Pat and Rick Callens Kathy Cameron Mary Kathryn & Deacon Douglas Campbell Camy Couture

Harry Capaci Bonnie and Randy Carignan Debra and Joseph Caroline Marlene Carriere-Binde Carrington MOMS group Carol and Daniel Cashman Sharon and Brian Caspers Catholic United Financial Gloria Charlton Mike Cherney Jessica and Shawn Christmann Megan and Matthew Clapp Bruce Clark Donna and Pat Clark Classic Jewelers Kenneth Collings Jane and Leon Comeau Comforts of Home Quilting and More Nancy Conway Corporate Technologies Donna Rae Cotton Kris Coughlin Diane and Gary Cowdrey Cracked Pepper Beth Cramer Patsy Crooke Tom Cummings Kris Dahl Benjamin Dahl Mariko and Dan Dahl Kimberly and Corey Dahl Margaret and Kenneth Dahl Phillip Dahle Dakota Eye Institute Dakota Health Solutions Dakota Medical Foundation Coralynn Dallmann Len Dammel Nancy Darling Beth Darr Pam Davidson Terry Davis Del Davis Carol and Lynn Davis Calvin Davy Deadwood Gulch Resort Diana & Edward Deats-O’Reilly Randy Deckert Jacob DeCock

Andrew DeCock Sr. Maura DeCrans Judy and Dale Degenstein Michael Deichert Lori and Chalmer Dettler Susan and John Deutsch Bill Deutsch Lynne Devitt Jane and Todd Dickerson Deb and Deacon Ed Didier Adam Diemert Patrice and Daniel Dietz Dennis Dockter Sue and Bruce Dokken Phyllis and Stan Dolbinski Janelle and Thomas Doll LaWayne Doll Mary Ann Donnay Tom Dosch Marianna and Adam Dosch Mary and Gregory Downs Leon Doyle Jeff Dube Loretta and David Duma James Dunn Betty and Gene Dura Steve Dusek Holly and Peter Eberle Wallace Ebertowski Fr. Leonard Eckroth Carl Edgerly Barbara Edwards-Palalay Rob Eisenzimmer Becky and David Elbert Elite Massage Joyce Elgin Brad Ellingson Donald Elston David Enger Duane Erickson Carmen Erickson Christopher Erickson Lori and John Erie Fr. James Ermer John Ermer Allan Essler Alvin Ettl James Evanoff Anita Evenson Dwight Faiman Bonnie Faller

Fargo-Moorhead RedHawks Chad Faul Pat and Ray Fegley Cliff Ferebee Marlys and James Ferguson Sherry Fetch Herman Fettig Roman Fettig Fetzer Chiropractic Floyd Fetzer Joanne and Rodger Fewell Emmie Mae Fiebiger Charles Finneman Christine Finneman Donald Fischer Helen and Clarence Fischer Leonard Fix Bryan Fluhrer Jim Foss Bonnie Fossen Kevin Franks Phylis Frederickson DuWayne Fretty Dwight Friedt William Friesz Mary and John Frolek Ross Fugleberg Candace & Harlan Fuglesten Kathleen Gaddie Lenora Gangl Linda and Joshua Gartner Gate City Bank Eileen and Arthur Gatzke Colette and Mel Gauslow Mary and Thomas Geffre Patricia Geiger Helen Geinert Mary German Thomas Gibson Gabe Gietzen Donald Glarum Randy Glasoe Wanda Glock Connie & Dennis Glueckert Janice Goehring Msgr. Joseph Goering Sharon Gosline Lee and Rod Gosline Allen Gotvaslee

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To learn more about Giving Opportunities, contact Colleen Hardy, Director of Development and Community Relations, at (701) 235-4457 or chardy at catholiccharitiesnd.org. nine

David Gowan Glen Grad Shelly Graening Jane Grage Grand Forks Sertoma Club Fr. Thomas Graner Granite City Paul Gratton Ronelle Gravgaard Great Harvest Bread Company Albert Greff Ramey & Gerry Grensteiner Dan Greshik Jack Griffin Dave Griffin Lela and Raphael Grim Thomas D. Grimestad Lynne Grinsteiner Leanne Grondahl James Grosgebauer Meredith and Joseph Gross Grouser Products Dennis Grubb Vicky and Anton Gudajtes Russell Guderjahn Fr. Kurtis Gunwall Dennis Gustafson Dorothy J. Gustafson Cathy and Kenneth Haarstad Jeffrey Haasbeek Nancy Hagen Jackie Hager Shawn and Michael Hagstrom Ms. Darlene Haider Joyce and John Hajostek Mary-Jean and Donald Hale Bernard Hall Roger Hall Leland Ham Gale Hamel Gerald Hamm Roger Hammer Robert Hanson Allan Hanson Happy Nails Spa Geri and Bill Harbeke Lois and Bill Hardy Colleen Hardy Kristi L. Hardy Lyn and Greg Haring Agnes and Ryan Harrington James Harrington Tim Hart Bruce Haskins Vicki and Sid Hauge Paulette Haugen Shelly and Darrin Hawley George Hayden Hearts and Hands Massage Donald Heier Rosemary and Harvey Heise Jeanne and Darwin Helmers Barry Helseth Donna Hensen Lynn and Richard Hentges

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Donna and Roger Hentges Vernon Herbel Brian Herding Judy and Lee Hermanson Cliff Hermes Cliff Herrick Louise and Robert Hesler Pam Heupel Joanne Hill Lydia and James Hillerson Jean and George Hilts Ms. Miracle Hoff Debora and James Hoffert Kathy and Dennis Hogan James Hollarn Valerie and Christopher Holm Holy Family Catholic Church Donna T. Honek Lou Ann Honek Curt Honeyman Hornbacher’s Grocery Wayne Hornberger Keith Horner Terrance Horning Linda Hovde Donna and Marvin Huber Clyde Huber Christy and Steve Huber Ron Huff Sharon and Jim Hughes Paul Hughes Marlene Hulm Betty and Morris Hund Valerie and James Hunt Kristal Huntley-Egemo Hurley’s Religious Goods IBM Employee Services Jim Ingersoll Steven Irey Zeke Isakson Janet and Jerry Iverson Cliff Iverson Kevin Iverson Ken Jablonsky Aanders Jackson Jerome Jaeger William Jansen Gary Jenson Brian Jenson David Johnson Leanne Johnson Christoper Johnson Karla and Jeffrey Johnson Patricia Johnson David Johnson Lloyd Johnston Mark Johnston Tarri and Kendall Joki Barbara and Corwin Jones Rose Jungers Dwayne Just Timothy Kadrmas Darwin Kamletz Doris Karas Carol and Rick Kasper Ed Kehrwald Gladys Keily

Margaret Keller Charles Keller Allison Keller Brian Keller Jason Kelsch Dana Kennelly Maureen Kensok Patricia and Don Kercher Kenneth Keyes Anne and Kevin Kidder Joan and Roger Kieffer Ernest King Joann Kitchens Ronald Klang Ross Klebe Dorothy and Eugene Klein Robert Klein David Kline Linette and Patrick Knoll Sue and Paul Knoll Todd Kohler Kohl’s Timothy Kolke Shirley Kondelis Steve Kourajian Kevin Kovash Diane and Monte Kovash Joyln Krabbenhoft Laurie and Phil Kraemer Terry Kraft Kathy and Larry Kragh Bernice and Roger Kram Lillian Krance Cindy and Aaron Krauter Fr. Bruce Krebs Jaime Kreider William E. Kretschmar Stephanie Kritzberger Dan Krosbakken Diane and Joseph Krupinsky Judy and Gary Kubalak Kathy Kuhn Eunice and Peter Kuhn Richard Kupitz Mary and David Kurtenbach Leo Lacher Fr. Ross LaFramboise Dennis Lagasse Michael Lagasse Denise and Richard Lagasse Alice Lagein Robert Lamont Muriel and Robert Lamp Allan Lamp Daniel Langemo Tom Langemo Barbara and Al Langer Diane Langer Maureen Larrabee Robert Larson Allen Larson Danette and Jim Laske Laurie’s Thomas Lautenschlager Judy Lee David Lee Margie and Larry Lee

Marvin Leiberg Carol Leidholm Keith Leingang Kary Leingang Fr. Donald Leiphon Susan Lengowski Melvin Lennick Jesme Leon Wayne Lervik Daniel Lewis Barbara A. Lies Doris and Duane Liffrig Mary Livingston Charles Loe Fr. Leonard Loegering Ronda and Steven Loegering Shelby Loftsgard Cindy and Stuart Longtin Beverly and Faustino Lopes Jim Lorenz Jaselta M. Lorenz Les Lovaas Bradley Luyten JoAnne and Jim Lyons Don Madsen Imia and Joseph Mages Sharon Maier Robert Markle Marriott Minneapolis SW Gary Marsden Kim Marsh Christine Marshall Jody Martell Tammy and Kevin Martian Jennifer and Joseph Martin Chris and Bill Martin Paulette and Keith Martin Linda and Larry Maslowski Paulette Mattern Kathy and Joe Maus Robert Mayer Jeaninne and Don McAllister Corenne and Monte McAtee Brenda McBain Fr. Gerald McCarthy Robert McDonald James McDonald Wilma Jean and Hugh McDonald Joyce and Rex McDowall Jerome McGovern Carol and Judd McKinnon Donna and Gordon McLaughlin Theresa & William McMillan David Meiers Luke Melgaard Mary Mercer Mary Meyer Randy Meyer Miche Bag Company Marge Mick Microsoft Corporation Matching Gifts Program Janelle Miedema and Adrian Allard

Jim Miller Randy Miller Jean Miller Rodney Miller Gary Miller Lynn Miller Minnesota Timberwolves Fastbreak Foundation Minnesota Twins Baseball Club Minnesota Vikings Minnkota Recycling Bill Mitchell Jessi and Doug Mithun Michaelyn Moch Lane Moellenkamp Ricky Mohl Jennifer Money Shar Money John Mongeon Ray Moots Charlotte Morgan Virginia and Richard Morgan Aaron Morman Dennis Morris Edward Mosser LeRoy Mosset Cassie and Steven Mott Karen Mund Peter Murtaugh Deborah and Donald Myaer Gary Myhre Leona and Richard Nagel Jeff Nathan Betty and Ken Neameyer Jeff Nelson Jean Nelson Linda K. Nelson Alice Nelson Kris Neset Paul Ness Dennis Ness Network for Good Leonard Neubauer Barb Nicholson Cheri and Michael Nicolai Louis Nicoli Stephanie Nilles Msgr. Allan Nilles David Nilson Cindy and Steve Noack Andy Noah Ronald Norbury David Norheim Dolores Normandin Roger Norris Northern Improvement Comp Northport Drug O’Day Cache Paul O’Donnell Kevin O’Leary Larry Odegaard Off the Wall Advertising Cal Oien Jerry Olafson Allen Olheiser Clarence Olheiser Judy and Rod Olin

Myron Olson Nyla Olson Nancy and Paul Olson Lester Olson Andrea Olson Georgia Olstad Michael Opdahl Mark Opland Norman Ostboe Amy and Brian Osvold Barbara and James Otto Ardean Ouellette Larry Overbo Ruth Overton Kim Overton Deane Palen Reva Palmer Lane Parker Marlys and Ronald Parrish PATH Gordon Patten Doris Paulson Jerry Paulson Gene Paupst Heather Pautz Joyce and John Pavlish Edwin Pawlikowski Deb Pederson Brian Pederson Sarah and Eric Pegors Jill Perhus Michelle and Michael Perius Peggy Person Bill Peters Lowell Peterson David Peterson Fr. Bernard Pfau Ruth C. Phalen Harry Pieterick Christina Pikula Msgr. Daniel Pilon Karen Plum John and Sharon Pollard Dennis Pommerer Shirley and Todd Porter Scott Privratsky Kyle Prodzinski Mary Prough Shellie and Kevin Racer Julie Rademacher Carol Radenz Scott Radloff Rae-Bon Sewing Center James Ralph Brenda and Mike Rambur Mindy and Lowell Rau Clarence Rau RD Offutt Company Sharon Reiner Marsha Reinisch Luann Renner Janet and Russell Rhoads Sharon and George Richard Rozann Richter Michael Rieger Philomena and Marvin Ries Lisa Ripplinger

Thomas Robinson Yvonne Rock Lisa Rodman Mary and Bob Rohla Glenn Rolstad Dennis Romfo Donald Ronglien Rebecca & Dennis Rosenkranz Tracy and Troy Ross Max Rubio Robert Rugenstein Margaret and James Rundlett-Doom Gina and TJ Russell Ryan Family Dealerships Susan Rydell Cornel Rygh Eugene Sackman Sacred Heart Church Steven Sailer Eugene Sailer Thomas Sailer St. Alphonsus Church St. Anthony Church St. Boniface Church St. Boniface Church St. Charles Borromeo Church St. John the Evangelist St. John’s Sewers Group St. Martin of Tours St. Mary Church St. Mary’s Cathedral St. Michael Church Sts. Anne & Joachim Catholic Church Sts. Peter and Paul Church Masiya S. Salat Avis and Reidar Sandvold Michael Santjer Sheila and Rick Sartwell Roger Sateren Nathan Sather Dale Sather Pauline and Paul Savageau Mike Sayler Duane Schaan Herman Schafer Dominic Schaff Gerald Schall Jim Schaller Robert Schatzke Scheels Corporate Office Richard Schiffner Larry Schilke Wesley Schilke Ronald Schimke Dennis Schirado Katie and Josh Schlichenmayer Howard Schmid Norlyn Schmidt Todd Schmidt Karen Schmidt Constance and Lloyd Schmidt Mary Schmidt W. Peter Schmitt Connie and Jason Schneider

Fr. Bernie Schneider Steve J. Schons Marci Schorsch Henry Schroeder James Schroeder Patricia and Doyle Schulz Debra and Jim Schumacher Billie and Steve Schumacher Jeanne and Gary Schumacher Elvie and Sylvester Schuster Rod Schwandt Bruce Schwartz Steven Schwartz Lowell Schweigert Donald P. Schwert Ed Schwind Cathy and Morrie Schwinden Maureen Scott Bernadine & Daniel Seefeldt Jennine and Benedict Seitz Steven Selfors Rory Selk Terry Severson Greg Shanenko Bruce Shanenko Ken Shaw Marc E. Sheehan Fr. Edward Sherman Dorothy and Albert Sickler Michael Sidener Joan and Cameron Sillers Phyllis and Raymond Simon Sisters of Mary of the Presentation Sisters of St. Francis Sisters of the Presentation of the Blessed Virgin Mary David Skadsem Brian Skar Don Skari Bernard Skibicki Linda and Brian Skjerseth Msgr. Dennis Skonseng Randy Slais Patty Slinde Willis Smith Barbara and Jess Smith Alan Solberg Ronald Solberg Michael Sorlie Penne Soucy Denise Spanjer David Speare Spitfire Bar & Grill Lisa and Marlyn Staiger Kasy Staus Staybridge Suites of Fargo Donald Steenerson Angela Steffan MaryJo Steffes Rita and Donald Steidl Kathy and Dave Steinbach Frances D. Stevens Jerilyn Stocker Larry Stolz Stop-n-Go Meridee and Pat Stowman

Shirley and Mark Stowman Gerald Strahm Charlene Strand Patsy Strand Barbara Stransky Leslie Strege Patta Stroh Ardis Stuhlmiller Alan Stumpf Savvy Styles Shirley Suda Katherine and Rudolph Suda John Suess Molly Sullivan Fr. Patrick Sullivan Randy Summers Eleanor Summers Larry Sundbakken Dede Swedlund Donald Taylor Eileen and Randy Teberg Robert Teets Rebecca Telin Julie and Brian Ternes Ellen Tetrault The Flag The Source Salon and Beauty Supply Theodore Roosevelt Medora Foundation Bernice Thielges Randy Thom Jani Thomas Denise Thomas Becky Thomas Lisa Thompson Larry Thompson Robert Thoreson Gisele Thorson Karla Thykesn Maureen Tomaszewski Pat Torgerson Vicki Treitline Daniel Triller Jim Triska Herman Tryhus Gerald Tschider Kyle Tschosik Alemayehu Tulu Tom Tupa Reinard Uhlich Ric Ukestad Gordon Ulberg Sherill Ungerecht UND Athletics Kenneth Urlacher James Ussatis Verna Vaage Shawn Vachal Jeffrey Van Beek Gerald W. Vande Walle Curtis VanDyke Mark Vanlishout Loren Vannett Janet and Alan Vasicek Juan Velazquezsmazo Ron Vetter

Mary and Joe Vetter Stephanie Vetter-Topp Reuben Viland Village Inn Vitality Massage Jill and Paul Von Ebers Leslie Wagner Donald Wahus Esther Wakeman Jerry Wald Corie Walker Rhonda and Shane Walock Janet Washek Samantha Watson Tanya and Tony Watterud George Waxler Mark Weber Colleen Weflen Dave Wegner Jill and Andrew Wehseler Clarence Weigel Jodi Lee and Robert Weigel Laurel and Bob Weigelt Donna and Roman Weiler Diane and Patrick Weir Ronald Weishaar Hilda and Pius Welk Nicole Welle Nere Charles Wendel Debra and Jake Werner Joy and Edwin Wesolowski Scott Weston Cora Weyrauch Joel Wheeler Wholistic Health Options Jerel Wieser Vicki and Ron Wiisanen Chandra Wilcox Anissa Wilhelm James Wilhelmi Barb and Bob Williamson Ronald Willms Roger Wilson Wimmer’s Jewelry Barb and Kurt Witteman Gerald Wittenberg Karen and Albert Wolf Donna Wolf Michael Wolf Liz Wolsky Thanida Wongjirad Chuck Woodbury Emily and Michael Woodley Marge and Jim Woodrow David Zach Lonnie Zahn Kelli Zahradka-Bohn Barbara and Joseph Zeleznik Gini and Robert Zent Larry Zepp Diana and Bryan Zepp Barbara Ziegler Bonnie Ziemann Gary Zimmerman Philip Zubrod

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NON-PROFIT ORG. U.S. POSTAGE

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Catholic Charities

FARGO, ND

North Dakota

Permit No. 1454

5201 Bishops Boulevard, Suite B Fargo, ND 58104-7605 Return Service Requested

To receive this newsletter by email, or to have your name removed from the mailing list, please call 1-800-450-4457 or email jedwards@catholiccharitiesnd.org.

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0ffice locations • 919 7th St. S, Ste 607 Bismarck 58504 (701) 255-1793 • 5201 Bishops Blvd, Ste B Fargo 58104-7605 (701) 235-4457

Chip In for Charity golf passes are available for $40.00 each. For the passes, please go to www.CatholicCharitiesND.org Call Colleen Hardy at (701) 235-4457 for more information.

• 311 4th St. S, Ste 105 Grand Forks 58201 (701) 775-4196 • 216 S Broadway, Ste 103 Minot 58701 (701) 852-2854

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90

years

Save the Date

October 15 is the date for our Annual Celebration Luncheon.

Time and place to be announced!