ARE YOU READY TO GET MARRIED? SEE FLOW CHART PAGE 84 WELCOME TO HILTON HEAD! WHERE TO STAY AND WHAT TO DO
HAPPY FATHER’S DAY! FIRST TIME DADDIES TALK BABIES VIDEO
Whether you have been married for decades or days, being a better spouse should begin with one mission: keep your marriage intimate. Imagine your marriage is an egg, and what goes on inside that egg should stay inside that egg.”- page 97
P18 Editor’s Note Ladyfish entrepreneur
P22 Happy Father’s Day First time daddies talk babies.
P28 A Series of Fortunate Events
P32 Charity Corner The Great Race to benefit Hilton Head Heroes
P34 South Carolina’s Deadliest Creatures A pictorial guide to animals you should observe from a safe distance
P36 Shane Marstiller A Love of Music Rekindled
P20 NEW COLUMN: C2 Fashion Island Style for summer months.
P40 Vineyard 55 The Bluffton State of Mind lives on here
Love of Music Rekindled
ARE YOU READY TO GET MARRIED? SEE FLOW CHART PAGE 23 WELCOME TO HILTON HEAD! WHERE TO STAY AND WHAT TO DO PHOTO
RELAX AND SIT A SPELL IN OLD TOWN BLUFFTON
CELEBRATE BLUFFTON & BEYOND
HAPPY FATHER’S DAY! FIRST TIME DADDIES TALK BABIES
SOUTH CAROLINA’S DEADLIEST CREATURES
Photography by Mark Staff Shane Marstiller: A Love of Music Rekindled See story on page 36.
HAPPY FATHER’S DAY! FIRST TIME DADDIES TALK BABIES VIDIO
WAYS TO TRAVEL BETTER & SMARTER TIPS ON TRAVEL APPS, PACKING & MORE
ON OUR CH2 COVER
ARE YOU READY TO GET MARRIED? SEE FLOW CHART PAGE 23
ON OUR CB2 COVER Photography by Anne Vineyard 55 in Old Town Bluffton See story on page 40.
SHOULD YOU LIVE TOGETHER BEFORE TYING THE KNOT?
Beyond the Beach Shelter Cove Harbour & Marina: Your headquarters for fun on the water
Where to Stay Hilton Head Hospitality’s Return to Glory
What to Do on HHI No matter the weather, you will be entertained
P64 Sun-safe Reducing kids’ sun exposure lowers skin cancer risk later in life
P68 Atlantic Sprayfoam Building a great reputation
P74 C2 BRIDAL SECTION
P76 Wedding Feature Jeffrey and Nicky get hitched
P84 Are You Ready to Get Married? For the potential groom only!
P87 Should a couple live together before marriage?
P90 Wedding Review Dexter and Mackenzie tie the knot
P97 Being Better How to be a better spouse
P100 Reception Planning Advice from Ela’s Blue Water Grille
P102 Celebrate Bluffton New app highlights history
P108 A Word from the Mayors of Hilton Head & Bluffton
P111 A Line in the Sand The blame game june 2014
2 CELEBRATE BLUFFTON & BEYOND
People Who Do Stuff (we don’t know if they actually get paid or not) Chief People Herder Maggie Marie Washo
l a d y f i s h.com
#Ladyfish Entrepreneur Kelly “I’m not telling you my middle name” Stroud On The “Back Nine” George Thomas Staebler Mergers & Aquisitions Marion Elizabeth Bowser Caffeine Addiction Counselor Catherine Anne Davies Arbitration Expert and Resident Hypochondriac Ashton Kelley Fons Director of Fun & Happiness Advocate Kim Conrad Crouch Book Club President Carolyn Hunter Kostylo Conflict Resolution Specialist “Just Kandace” Wightman Ambassador to the Beaufort Division Kaity Elizabeth Robinson
ur very own Kelly Stroud has become an entrepreneur, and I could not be more proud of her. Over the past eight years, since Kelly has lived on the island, she has spent much of her spare time fishing with her main squeeze George. Whether in the Palmetto Dunes lagoon fishing for redfish or underneath the Beaufort Bridge trolling for cobia, this gal knows fishing. And she truly LOVES it.
Office Mascots Lucille Rosita Gonzalez Washo Greta Von Bowser “The Media” Kitty Bartell Navneet Dhillon, MD Frank Dunne Jr. Rebecca Edwards Andrea Gannon Courtney Hampson Courtney Hillis Linda S. Hopkins Barry Kaufman Drew McLaughlin Michael Paskevich Lisa Sulka Debbis Szpanka Erin Wasem “The Artist” Emily Joy Noviski “The Paparazzi” Mark Staff Photography Photography by Anne Find Us HERE PO Box 22949 Hilton Head, SC 29925 843.689.2658 firstname.lastname@example.org
M. WASHO PUBLISHER / EDITOR
What she didn’t love was the lack of cute, lightweight clothing for women who can “bait their own hook.” So she did what graphic designers do. Kelly spent a few months dreaming up a name, another few months perfecting a logo and Ladyfish was born, offering coastal wear and fishing apparel for ladies. As of now, she has debuted her clothing line at the Seafood Festival on Hilton Head in April and the Bluffton Village Festival in May. But no need to wait for the next festival. You can get your very own ladyfish tank, sweatshirt or koozie at www.ladyfish.com, or in the Ship’s Store (underneath Ela’s Blue Water Grille) in Shelter Cove Harbour. Hopefully we’ll start seeing #ladyfish everywhere in the near future. Hey, the Walt Disney World Empire started with a mouse, right?
Fashion Tip: Don’t be afraid to mix up things in your closet. Don’t get in a rut - try things together that you wouldn’t normally, and you might be surprised how many options you have. Always add a pop of color somewhere even if it doesn’t “match.”
Joy Joy Peach Butterfly Top $54, Mia & Moss Picadilly Mini Shorts $69, Brown Fringe Purse $65, Atara Metallic Dolce Vita Gladiator Sandals $79, Orange Beaded Teardrop Earrings $20, 3 set Matte Gold Bangles $45, Oval Shaped Bangles $25, Stretchy Beaded Bracelet $14, Stretchy Tassel Bracelet $18 Get the entire look at Coastal Bliss
A Night Out
Flowy Trina Triangle Alice & Olivia Dress $298, Eric Javits Round Wristlet $185, L. Kalmans Earrings $146, A. Bittar Gold Hinge Bracelets $108 per bangle, Donald Pliner Carli Wedge in Indigo $198 Get the entire look at Porcupine
Meet the stylist, Kim Molloy I am a 20 year island resident with three kids and a husband - need I say more? As a child, I remember my father bringing my mom beautiful clothes from all over the world from his travels. This began my interest in fashion, and I have been hooked ever since. While never studying fashion professionally, it has been a hobby/interest for a lifetime. After helping friends over the years with their wardrobes, a little stroke of luck came my way to do this professionally (thanks Mark Staff & CH2), and now I have the complete privilege of sharing my style with you.
O’Neill Jaden Romper $49, L Space Cozumel Bikini Top $103, L Space Estella Bikini Bottom $66, Reef Stargazer flip flops $28, Ray Ban Cockpit Aviators $155, Nixon Neon Yellow Time Teller $75 Rip Curl Milo Boho Sun Hat $30 Get the entire look at Quiet Storm
Coastal Must: Maxi Dress This summer staple is cool, colorful, comfortable, and stylish ,making it a great choice for everyone. Change up the shoes and accessories to make it transition from day to night. Maxi Dress Alice & Trixie Striped Maxi $375 Copper Penny Savannah
DADS Article by Becca Edwards
eff Thompson is the area director for Hilton Head and Bluffton Young Life, a Christian ministry to high school students. Yet, if you asked him what his chief responsibility is, he would say, “I am the bath environment coordinator, burp master, and diaper changer”—(when he is home) for his infant daughter Sullivan. “My favorite thing is bath time,” Thompson said. “We give her a bath almost daily, and I’ve done about 95 percent of them. I tell my wife Maddie that I create an environment in the bathroom by turning on a heater and keeping the bath the perfect temperature, and I definitely have a strategy that Sullivan appreciates and is used to.” Lawrence Powell is a bartender at Jump and Phil’s Bar and Grill, but you might say he runs defense better than Jadeveon Clowney. “My wife Lauren makes jewelry, which can be time-consuming and hard to just put down in the middle of a project. Lauren breastfeeds, and when our daughter Lola is hungry, my specialty is recognizing it early and buying Lauren that extra five minutes before the crying baby meltdown.” Alex Magowitz and his wife Kristin are expecting their first child in the fall. Though he works as a general manager for a specialty retail store, he’s a domestic yogi with good intentions. “Whenever I get a little anxiety about the baby coming, I tell myself a little joke that helps me balance everything,” Magowitz said. “I say to myself, ‘I’m pretty much awesome at everything I attempt, so we’ll be okay.’ Then I laugh at myself and take a deep breath and go on with my day, knowing that this little girl is about to rock my world.” Guys like Thompson, Powell and Magowitz are living proof that dads today are not duds. Wiping away old stereotypes and pacifying not only babies, but sleepless moms who just want to take a shower in peace, these men are taking an active role in creating
a happy home. Reporting on a Pew Research Center study which the Today show published online, “In an average week, modern dads are spending nearly triple the time on direct child care and more than double the time on housework than their fathers or grandfathers did in the 1960s. For expectant dads, this begins as soon as they get the big news. “My wife had mentioned that she was late, so I thought it was a possibility,” Thompson said. “But I was sitting in a work meeting when I got a picture text message of a digital pregnancy test that read, ‘Pregnant’ along with the message, ‘I’m making an appointment.’ I almost fell out of my chair. Initially, I was more nervous or anxious than anything because it was such a surprise, but it didn’t take long for that to turn into excitement about the joy a baby would bring.” The Thompsons started planning for parenthood almost immediately, deciding on a birth doula and a prenatal game plan.
“A number of factors, like a growing population of women in the workforce, an unsteady economy and stale cultural stereotypes are forcing modern parents to redefine gender roles and change the very definition of father and mother.”- Shawn Bean, Babytalk Magazine
New dads nationwide are expressing more opinions about baby names, prenatal care, birthing options, and— thanks to companies like Tactical Baby Gear (that sell diaper bags like the Heavy “Doodie”)—how to tote their tots around and other baby paraphernalia. Modern dads are also not going to let the moms have all the fun. In the Huffington Post article, “Dadchelor Parties Celebrate First Time Fathers,” contributor Katherine Bindley describes dads-tobe celebrating with “diaper kegs,” where men bring diapers in exchange for beer or even enjoy a last hurrah getaway weekend. Men are also helping to plan gender reveal parties; and more couples are having his and her baby showers. Why this new breed of fathers? According to Shawn Bean, father and executive editor of Babytalk magazine, “A number of factors, like a growing population of women in the workforce, an unsteady economy and stale cultural stereotypes are forcing modern parents to redefine gender roles and change the very definition of father and mother.” Citing Roland Warren, president of the National Fatherhood Initiative (NFI), Bean wrote, “Historically, dads have had a good understanding of needing to be a provider. Today’s dad understands that’s not enough. You must provide, but also nurture and guide. That heart-to-heart connection is critical.” This connection is also strengthening the bond between the father and mother. “It is amazing what is going on there,” Magowitz said. “I really had no way of knowing what to expect. My mind is constantly blown.” Thompson and Powell are on board with Magowitz. “I absolutely have a new respect for moms,” Thompson said. “Maddie went through that whole process like a champ—not only the hours of labor and birth with no meds, but months of carrying around a bowling ball strapped to her chest. We always look at each other and say we can’t believe that we made this! When two people love something so much, it can’t June
help but draw you in to love each other more.” As for advice for Magowitz and expectant first-timers like him, both Thompson and Powell say the biggest change is scheduling. “I definitely have a lot less free time, and it has cut down my rounds of golf significantly!” Thompson joked. “But seriously, I feel like it has given me a much better perspective of how much God loves me. You always hear that He loves you unconditionally, but now I really feel like I understand that.” These proud papas also say that the moment their child was born, their world shifted—for the better. “The first time I saw and held Lola, I knew things would never be the same,” Powell said. “She seemed to look right at me, and I felt an immediate sense of responsibility and protection for this little life. It was a little overwhelming at first, but as we grow, I just love her more and more.” “This sounds cliché, but I love everything about being a dad. I’ve always looked forward to having kids and have never really been scared or nervous about having kids,” Thompson said. “Sullivan brings so much joy to my life, and I love her so stinking much; I really think my capacity to love expanded the second she was born.” As for Magowitz, he has a deep respect and appreciation for his father and hopes to emulate some of his parenting skills, as well as incorporate some of his own. “I love my father. I hope that I can be even half the father he has been to me. Yes, there are things I will do differently, but his only motivation for doing everything he did was to provide for his family. I hope to do the same.” On Father’s Day we celebrate dads like Thompson, Powell and Magowitz—and dads like you who may be reading this. We honor the hugs and kisses, memories and milestones, and those giggles and smiles that Powell says “melt his heart every time.” Becca Edwards is a birth doula, holistic health coach, yoga and Barre instructor, writer/blogger, and owner of b.e.well and b.e.creative (bewellandcreative.com). June
e C2 A Series of
Bluffton, Jasper County Volunteers in Medicine is pleased to announce Pam Toney as their new executive director.
The Rotary Club of Hilton Head Island, long recognized in the Hilton Head area for its contributions to the community and the world, was further recognized at Rotary District 7770’s Annual Conference in Charleston.
The Women’s Association of Hilton Head Island donated over $9,000 this year. Funds went to WAHHI’s Youth Community Service Award Program for graduating high school seniors and to local non-profit organizations
McGladrey Classic gives back to the Savannah community making a $10,000 donation to the United Way of the Coastal Empire on Monday, April 14, 2014. United Way President Gregg Schroeder accepted the check on behalf of the United Way from Davis Love, professional golfer and founder of the McGladrey Classic, and Brian Harmon, professional golfer and Savannah native The Women’s Association of Hilton Head Island presented their annual award of $1,000 each to two high school seniors, Forest Richardson of Hilton Head Preparatory School and Kate Bennett of Hilton Head Christian Academy, in recognition of outstanding community service. Cindi Loveall has joined Gateway as the front desk manager and administrative assistant for the Randy Fix Team at our Berkeley Hall office. Trish Buppert has joined Gateway as contract processor at the Belfair office.
WEICHERT, REALTORSÂŽ Coastal Properties owners/brokersin-charge, Joe and Karen Ryan, welcome Mike Small to the agencyâ€™s sales team.
BB&T-Carswell Insurance Services has named Tiffany Johanson to their employee benefits staff as an account executive. She will be based at 2 Westbury Park Way, suite 103, Bluffton.
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Instructors and students from the Fred Astaire Dance Studio Hilton Head Bluffton were all finalists in the Fred Astaire Cross Country Ballroom Dance Championships held in Atlanta in April. This was a national competition.
Joan Sambuchino and Dianne McClusky have joined The Alliance Group Realty, located in the Fresh Market Shoppes on Hilton Head Island.
The Beaufort-Jasper Academy for Career Excellence has honored two members of its staff. Brad Childress has been named 2014 ACE Teacher of the Year and Lillian Mitchell has been named 2014 ACE Employee of the Year.
Congratulations to Adam Floyd and Emily Brisbee who got married on May 17th, 2014. Photography by Nicole Johnson
Mark Kissinger, an independent long-term care insurance specialist with ACSIA/LTC Global has recently relocated from Northeast Ohio and has opened an office in Bluffton
Kelly M. Jolley announces the opening of Jolley Law Group, LLC on Hilton Head Island. Attorney Michael Cerrati has joined the new firm.
C harity C orner
T he G reat R ace for a G reat Cause Court ney H illis
Stroud and Piekarski are recognized as part of the 100 Heroes for their contributions to the charity.
eet Mark Piekarski and Lennel Stroud, a local couple who is turning a hobby into a fundraising event for Hilton Head Heroes. Piekarski and Stroud will be racing a 1931 Ford Model A from Maine to Florida, all in the name of charity (and fun)! The couple, who have known each other since high school, will participate in The Great Race, an antique car rally of 100 vehicles. The cars will travel on secondary (non-interstate) roads competing in this time-speed-distance event. Piekarski said, “The key is to follow the precise instructions, the precise speed they give you, so that you do not come in too early or too late at the check points.” They are given very intricate directions that Stroud, as the navigator, must follow while Piekarski drives. “The directions are clues sometimes. They are not always clear so you have to pay attention.” Piekarski said. The pair is new to the event, but they have participated in other rallies as practice for The Great Race. Piekarski has always been interested in antique cars, and Stroud loves the look of the 1931 Model A. While they were shopping for the car, they came across an advertisement for The Great Race and decided it was something they wanted to
do. The rally begins on June 21 in Ogunquit, Maine and ends on June 29 in The Villages of Florida. The couple will travel with a support team, following The Great Race motto of “ride, repair, repeat.” Stroud and Piekarski drew inspiration from the Boston Marathon to raise money for their chosen charity, Hilton Head Heroes, during the event. Similar to the marathon, a person can pledge a dollar amount per mile completed; Piekarski and Stroud are asking for one cent to $1 per completed mile. In addition to the monetary donation, the couple will also be raising awareness for the charity by featuring the Hilton Heroes logo and website on the side of the car as well as passing out postcards at their scheduled stops, including Norfolk, Va.; Wilmington, N.C.; Mount Pleasant, S.C.; and Savannah, Ga. among others.
Hilton Head Heroes is the couple’s favorite local charity because it works with children who have life-threatening illnesses. The charity provides a weeklong vacation for families with children who are critically and terminally ill and who would otherwise not be able to afford a vacation. “To take them out of the everyday shots and let them have a little vacation; I just thinks it makes a world of healing for the family and the soul.” Stroud said. Stroud and Piekarski are recognized as part of the 100 Heroes for their contributions to the charity. For more information and to donate money, visit hhheroes.com.
COTTONMOUTH OR WATER MOCCASIN (VENOMOUS) Cottonmouth snakes are strong swimmers and are primarily located in or close to water, where their prey resides. More mature snakes appear to be darker in color as the distinctive markings fade.
DEADLY FACT: The venom of the cottonmouth is hemotoxic. This means that the venom breaks down and destroys blood cells and other tissues and reduces the ability of blood to coagulate or clot.
BULL SHARK (AGGRESSIVE) Many experts consider the bull shark to be the most dangerous in the world. They live near highpopulation coastal areas in the south and are known to travel through brackish and fresh water. Although they do not prefer to eat humans, they sometimes attack out of curiosity or confusion (they think your leg is a fish). Bull sharks are between seven and 15 feet in length and can weigh up to 500 lbs.
DEADLY FACT: The bull shark is classified as number three on the list of most dangerous sharks in the world when it comes to attacks on humans. THE OTHER TWO ARE THE GREAt WHITE AND TIGER SHARK.
BROWN RECLUSE SPIDER OR FIDDLEBACK SPIDER (VENOMOUS) The brown recluse spider is rarely aggressive, and bites are fairly uncommon. While it prefers the temperature-controlled habitats of humans, they are rarely seen and prefer to avoid contact of any kind.
SOUTHERN COPPERHEAD (VENOMOUS) In the Southern US, copperheads are nocturnal during the summer months, but are generally active during the day in spring and fall. When approached by humans they will freeze, instead of slithering away. Unfortunately this behavior results in bites as they are camouflaged so well they are accidentally stepped on. Watch closely where you step if walking in pine straw!
EASTERN DIAMONDBACK RATTLESNAKE (VENOMOUS) This is the largest venomous snake in North America, with some reaching up to eight feet long. Bites are extremely painful and can by fatal to humans if not treated quickly with antivenin. As with most reptiles, it prefers to avoid human contact and rattles its tail as a final warning before striking.
CORAL SNAKE (VENOMOUS) This snake is recognizable by it’s red, yellow and black banded coloring. Coral snakes are not aggressive and generally spend most of their time in sparsely populated areas. There are only an average of 15 to 25 coral snake bites in the U.S. per year. If you do happen to be one of the 25, however, it is imperative that you seek immediate medical attention. The venom of the coral snake can cause respiratory failure within hours and large doses of antivenin are required. STINGRAY (BARBED AT THE TAIL) Stingrays are very docile and the only reason they were included in this list is because of the barbed poison tail, which may accidentally come into contact with you under water.
SOUTHERN BLACK WIDOW (VENOMOUS) These spiders are known for the red hourglass shape on the female, and for the fact that the female sometimes devours her mate. Although not a large spider, the venom of the black widow spider is very potent.
AMERICAN ALLIGATOR (NON AGGRESSIVE) Observing alligators in their natural habitat ranks high on the list of Hilton Head Island’s biggest attractions. A word of caution: DO NOT FEED THE ALLIGATORS. This is for their sake and yours. As our local Gator expert and critter wrangler Joe Maffo tells people, “A fed gator is a dead gator.” Alligators who are fed begin to associate people with food, and will lose their healthy fear of humans. An alligator who starts approaching people will be removed from its pond and killed. DO NOT FEED THE ALLIGATORS!
HOW TO REMEMBER: RED TOUCHES YELLOW, KILL A FELLOWRED TOUCHES BLACK, VENOM LACK
Deadly fact: The Black WIDOW’S bite is much feared because its venom is reported to be 15 times stronger than a rattlesnake’s. In humans, bites produce muscle aches, nausea, and a paralysis of the diaphragm.
Article By Michael Paskevich // Photography by Mark Staff // Design by Kelly Stroud
usic was on the back burner when Shane Marstiller landed a job as a firefighter on Hilton Head Island five years ago. But his discovery of a vibrant island scene and a classic guitar sparked a personal revival that found him showcasing his original songs at a release party on May 2 at the Smokehouse. â€œI played in high school but fell out of it in college,â€? said Marstiller, a 27-year-old
Photo by John Rechin
Photo by Krisztian Lonyai
West Virginia native. “When I moved here to join the Fire and was enlisted to round out the sound and mix Marstiller’s Rescue department, I bought a guitar (a white 1990 Gibson Les music, and Snyder shares production and engineering Paul) from a friend, and it was like finding that classic car that credit with Cranford on “Counting Down the Days,” a threeyou’ve always wanted, That really started me playing again, and song extended play (EP) release with Marstiller on guitars one thing has led to another.” and polished vocals and Cranford on drums. Marstiller soon became one-third of Quick Trixie, a rock The title track is a big-beat rock shuffle with a country cover trio, featuring bassist Josh Kirk, a Bluffton elementary twang, courtesy of honky-tonk piano work from Snyder, and school teacher, and drummer Travis Goudy. “We’re all weekend Marstiller’s lyrics are a tribute to the rigors of often-lonely warriors with day jobs, but we’re a party band that’s energetic life on the road. “It’s about being away from somebody for and really has a lot of fun playing so long that you’re just counting together.” the days until you see them again,” Ongoing gigs in Bluffton and he said, recalling a Quick Trixie on Hilton Head led Marstiller to journey to a series of shows in start writing his own songs, and a Florida. “It’s basically about the solo performance last October at drive back home.” The ensuing a “Swampfire Showdown” at the “Big Mouth” features a generous Smokehouse drew positive attention chorus and catchy hooks, a lush from Swampfire label founder and sound and tongue-in-cheek lyrics. > Will Snyder > John Cranford Cranford Hollow front man John “It’s about saying the wrong thing Cranford. at the wrong time, which I think “He came up to me afterwards and said he’d like to record stems from being married,” Marstiller said with a smile. The some of my stuff which, of course, was an honor, because he’s debut effort concludes with a poignant mid-tempo tune, made such a name for himself,” Marstiller said. Months would “Last Goodbye,” which describes the uncertain nature of pass while Cranford Hollow toured regionally and as far west relationships and not knowing when they’re destined to end. as Colorado, but the two musicians got together again in “I stepped outside myself to write it, and it has nothing to do February and finally got down to work at Swampfire Studios with my own life,” said Marstiller, who is happily married to on New Orleans Road. Bass player and pianist Will Snyder Jenna, a Hilton Head librarian.
Shane envisions ongoing shows with Quick Trixie mixed with solo performances as he continues to write new songs for potential studio projects down the road.
Marstiller has yet to play his EP at Fire Station 5 inside Hilton Head Plantation where he works on a big red ladder truck during emergencies, but he credits fellow fire and rescue personnel for a crucial boost in a now-burgeoning sidelight career. “In all honesty, I probably couldn’t have done it without them,” he said. “When you start a band and you do a gig where nobody shows up, the bar probably isn’t going to book you again. But about 50 people from the department showed up for our first [Quick Trixie] show, so it looked really good; and they keep supporting us, which means so much.” He remains enchanted and perhaps a bit mystified by the recording process and the crucial studio contributions from Cranford and Snyder. “I just went in there, played my songs and a few days later they would send me something which sounded good and so different. I don’t know how many hours they put in, and it was like going to school watching them grow the tracks. They had their fingers in everything and, in five minutes, they were doing stuff on computer that would take me a month. That’s why it’s great to work with people who are so good at what they do.” Publicity savvy Cranford even spent a day helping Marstiller put up posters touting his EP release party at the Smokehouse. Marstiller is thrilled to become part of the area’s expanding live music scene. “What’s amazed me is how supportive everybody in the music community has been,” he said. “Everybody knows each other and, if you succeed, everybody succeeds. The only thing we have here is friendly competition; in a bigger city, I know it would be much more
cutthroat instead of everyone trying to pull each other up.” He envisions ongoing shows with Quick Trixie mixed with solo performances as he continues to write new songs for potential studio projects down the road. “I was writing a new song on the way over, and now I want to do another recording someday,” Marstiller said. “You know how that goes—I’ve got the bug.” And, of course, he will keep working ten 24-hour shifts per month as an island firefighter. “I’ve got no illusions of being famous or anything,” he added. “I just want to keep making music that I hope people will listen to and have a good time.”
Vineyard 55 “A Bluffton State of Mind” Lives on Here est. 2011
pparently Don Draper doesn’t work for the campaign winning ad agency responsible for changing Bluffton’s official catchphrase from a state of mind to a vital organ. Fans of the television series Mad Men will surely agree that fictional Sterling Cooper & Partners’ troubled but brilliant star copywriter would eschew rigidly commercial “Heart of the Lowcountry” for something that appears to arise organically from the hearts and minds of the people who live there… something like “A Bluffton State of Mind.” Whatever the billboards and print ads say from this point forward, one thing remains clear: the Bluffton state of mind isn’t going anywhere. See for yourself with a stroll through Old Town’s classic Lowcountry streetscapes in company with (shall we say…eclectic?) locals, in the shade of venerable live oaks and May River air, past Calhoun Street’s rustic art galleries, and through the doors into Vineyard 55 for a bite and a beer…or a glass of wine or two. Wood floors, leather chairs, wine racks, and a porch—not a deck, not a patio, a porch—presiding over Calhoun Street; everything about it, including the menu, says Bluffton. “We get a lot of wanderers for lunch,” said manager Cassie Robinson. “People doing the walking tour, coming from Savannah, coming from the island. At night, it’s a very local place, mostly
A rticle by F rank D unne , J r .
folks from the neighborhood.” To that last point, it’s the strange dynamic between two towns, Hilton Head Island and Bluffton, with only a bridge between them. “Island people don’t seem to come to Bluffton and Bluffton people don’t go to the island,” added proprietor Jon Rinaldi, although he thinks a change is in the air. “Now that downtown Bluffton has become a destination location, I think more people from outside Bluffton are becoming aware of us,” he said, not that a predominantly local clientele is a bad thing, as Vineyard 55’s success over three years of existence will attest. “It started out as a pretty small operation, a couple of guys tossing pizzas and slinging beers,” Robinson said. “Then it just took off.” Today’s Vineyard 55 menu includes appetizers, salads and soup, small plates and platters, sandwiches, and 11 Rustic Pizza varieties. According to Robinson, pizzas are still the biggest seller, but there’s a little something for everybody. For example the artisan cheese plate or antipasto platter make perfect complements to a selection of over 150 wines; there’s seared Ahi Tuna, Low Country boil, or jumbo lump crab cakes for the seafood appetite; and if you’re hungrier than that, get a plate of house made lasagna or a roast beef and bacon sandwich. Mind you, that’s a short list. You would do well to go there and get the big picture.
P hotography by anne
design by K elly S troud
the artisan cheese plate or antipasto platter make perfect complements to a selection of over 150 wines; there’s seared Ahi Tuna, Low Country boil, or jumbo lump crab cakes for the seafood appetite; and if you’re hungrier than that, get a plate of house made lasagna or a roast beef and bacon sandwich. Mind you, that’s a short list.
Today’s Vineyard 55 menu includes appetizers, salads and soup, small plates and platters, sandwiches, and 11 Rustic Pizza varieties. According to Robinson, pizzas are still the biggest seller, but there’s a little something for everybody.
Bar in Bluffton,” according to a local newspaper; but a restaurant business ultimately boils down to people. When the employees enjoy their work, it shows, and the customers will enjoy being there. “We have kind of a family atmosphere in here. We even fight like brothers and sisters!” Robinson joked. Asked if anything could lure her to another job, she’ll tell you, “Give me a house on the beach and tell me I never have to work again.” In other words, it’s Vineyard 55 or nothing, and that kind of attitude among the staff translates into a great atmosphere. One last thing: if you run into Cassie when you visit, ask her about the kitten. If you are so inclined, she might have one for you to adopt. Vineyard 55 is located in Old Town Bluffton at 55 Calhoun Street, Bluffton. For more information, call (843) 7579463, visit Vineyard55.com or facebook. com/Vineyard55.
“You can come in here and have halfpriced appetizers and a couple of drinks for Happy Hour and carry on your way,” Robinson said, “or we’ll have people who stay the whole, entire night. It’s not the kind of place where we try to turn and burn.” The reason people stay all night is music—live, local music every Wednesday through Saturday night, including familiar names like the Chiggers, Neil & Bob, and Jeff Beasley. Well, that and more than 80 beer selections to enjoy on premise or take home in a growler. “Just tell ’em live music, craft beer, and wine,” Rinaldi said. “And we’re hosting the Pink Partini on June 17,” he added. Okay, but let’s throw in great food too, and some aptly named cocktails like the Calhoun Kir, Porch Punch, State of Mind, and Pluff Mud Punch, and it’s definitely worth a trip over the bridge. Certainly all of that is reason for Vineyard 55’s two-year reign as “Best
“You can come in here and have half-priced appetizers and a couple of drinks for Happy Hour and carry on your way,” Robinson said, “or we’ll have people who stay the whole, entire night. It’s not the kind of place where we try to turn and burn.”
Jon Rinaldi, Owner of Vineyard 55.
Article By Linda S. Hopkins Photography by anne
Shelter Cove Harbour & Marina: your headquarters for fun on the wateR
hether you’re a thrill seeker, nature lover, fishing enthusiast or just someone who enjoys a water view, Shelter Cove Harbour and Marina will entice your aquatic spirit. Conveniently located midisland, with no entry fee and easy access, Shelter Cove Marina, Hilton Head Island’s largest deepwater yacht basin, is headquarters for a variety of water experiences. From mild to wild, the range of activities is sure to delight residents and guests of all ages and interests. Here are a few of your options: Fly above Broad Creek Shelter Cove Marina offers two unique ways to take flight over the water this summer: parasailing and jetpacking. For a calm, yet high-flying experience, Parasail Hilton Head has the ride for you. Safely seated and harnessed to your parasail (like a giant colorful parachute), which is tethered to the boat, you’ll get 10-12 minutes of air time and ascend up to 500 feet before coming in for a soft landing on the special flight deck aboard the boat. Captain Matt Williams offers a personalized experience by taking only six passengers out at a time. Fly solo or double, and choose if you want to be dipped in the water or not. Your wish is the captain’s command! For more information and to make your reservation, visit parasailhiltonhead.com. If you’re looking for an adrenaline rush, HHI JetPack, owned by Taylor Whitehead (CH2’s 2014 Bachelor of the Year), is Hilton Head Island’s new thrill ride. A recent flyer said, “The first time I flew the JetPack, it felt like I was in a James Bond movie. With a whole new perspective having a bird’s eye view, I was able to control all my movements while the trainer safely controlled the power.” Check out photos and videos and learn more about this exciting adventure, available only at Shelter Cove Marina, at hhijetpack.com.
Shelter Cove Harbour
Summer fish include big sharks, king mackerel, Spanish mackerel, barracuda, tarpon, Jack Crevelle, redfish and cobia. Customized half-day and full-day trips, and evening shark fishing trips can be arranged in Shelter Cove Marina.
As a bonus, on the way to open waters, both of these unforgettable flying experiences include a relaxing boat ride through picturesque Broad Creek, where playful dolphins, an amazing variety of Lowcountry birds and other wildlife are sure to entertain. Think of it as a nature tour and action adventure trip all in one. Go fish When you’re ready to drop a line and spin some new fish tales, Shelter Cove Marina offers an excursion just right for you. Inshore, near shore and offshore fishing is available through five private charter boats at Shelter Cove Marina: the 35-foot Gullah Gal (six people), the 34-foot True Grits (six people), the 26-foot Fin-atic (up to 11 people), the 24-foot Bayrunner (four people) and Palmetto Lagoon Charters, specializing in fly rod and light tackle fishing. Summer fish include big sharks, king mackerel, Spanish mackerel, barracuda, tarpon, Jack Crevelle, redfish and cobia. Customized half-day and full-day trips, and evening shark fishing trips can be arranged. An additional unique offering at Shelter Cove Marina is sport crabbing aboard the Crabber J II—a fabulous family outing. It’s all catch and release—just for fun—but the crew keeps score, and whoever catches the most wins the world famous Crabber J T-shirt. Families and large parties will enjoy the Captain Hook. Charter it or join in a scheduled trip with other guests. At 70 by 21 feet, the Capt. Hook is Hilton Head Island’s largest, most comfortable party fishing boat, accommodating up to 60 anglers. With a full galley, enclosed cabin, shaded and seated fishing areas, two restrooms and sun bathing on the upper deck, a good time is guaranteed. Reservations are suggested, and all trips include bait, tackle, rod & reel rental, instructions and fish cleaning. Choose your cruise For those who would rather passively observe the marine life, dolphin cruises, nature tours and sunset sails get you up close and personal with the area’s wildlife and natural beauty. Cruise boats include the 80-foot double deck Holiday, operated by Adventure Cruises, with a snack bar, restrooms and shaded seating. Trips offered include dolphin watch and sunset cruises, as June
Shelter Cove Harbour
A fun-family outing at Shelter Cove Marina is sport crabbing aboard the Crabber J II. It’s all catch and release— just for fun—but the crew keeps score, and whoever catches the most wins the world famous Crabber J T-shirt.
well as a special two-hour sunset cruise every Tuesday night this summer to view the HarbourFest fireworks from the water. The Fin-atic, also operated by Adventure Cruises, offers nature cruises as well as fishing excursions and can accommodate 11 passengers. Prefer the flap of the wind in a sail? Check out the Special K, a 40-foot luxury sailing yacht available for group excursions or a private captained charter. You can bring your own snacks or arrange for catering. They’ll even teach you to sail if you so desire. And yes, there is a restroom facility onboard. For a more active adventure, pontoon boats, kayaks and stand up paddle boards are available for rental from Outside Hilton Head. Explore on your own, or take a guided tour with a group. HarbourFest 2014 If you’re not sure which boat to book or After a fun day on the water, what experiences to choose, call the marina you’ll want to relax and enjoy at (843) 842-7001 and let Harbormaster HarbourFest, the island’s annual Kyle McDaniel help you make decisions that summer tradition featuring will best suit your Shannon Tanner at the Shelter interests and needs. Cove Harbour stage Monday – Friday nights from 6-9 pm, plus Cappy the Clown.. Tuesday Stay grounded nights from 6-9 p.m. will includes Not everyone arts and crafts, a variety of music loves a boat ride, and fun. Fireworks displays and for those who begin June 17 and take place at prefer to keep dusk every Tuesday night thru your feet on the August 12, weather permitting. ground, a stroll (No show July 1—special display along Shelter Cove on Friday, July 4). Read all about HarbourFest in the next issue Harbour is the perfect way to take in the of CH2. For more information water views and stay dry. Known for its array now, visit palmettodunes.com/ of shops and restaurants, now there’s even harbourfest-hilton-head.php. more fun to be had at the Art Café, Too, a paint-your-own pottery studio. A local patron posted this comment on Trip Advisor: “The Art Café is the place I turn to not only when little visitors appear, but all during the year for my own fun and when I want to make someone a very special, personalized gift.” According to Ginny Whitehead, owner of the original Art Café, the new satellite location at Shelter Cove Harbour (at Harbourside III), offers lots of nautical-themed pieces and will have something to satisfy artists of all ages and skill levels. For information, call (843) 785-5525 or visit on Facebook.
For more information on all fishing and boating options at Shelter Cove Marina as well as other activities on the Harbour, visit palmettodunes.com or call (843) 842-7001. 48
Article By Frank Dunne, JR. // Artwork by emily j. novitski
Hilton Head Hospitality’s Return to Glory
ortunately the news is good and possibly getting better. Not so much just a few short years ago for Hilton Head Island’s hospitality market. The late 1960s marked the beginning of the island’s rise to prominence as one of the Southeast’s premier—if not the premier—seaside destination resorts. You know the story: Charles Fraser’s vision for Hilton Head Island and the development of Sea Pines Plantation, then a stroke of good fortune like no other in the form of the inaugural Heritage Classic (now called RBC Heritage) in 1969. Who knows? With so many assets going for it, including beautiful beaches, warm weather, ideal terrain for golf course construction, and location, it’s likely that Hilton Head Island would have eventually become a world-class destination anyway; but nobody doubts that publicity generated by the first Heritage gave it a huge shot in the arm.
Supported by a sharp marketing strategy targeting the Midwest, Northeast, and Southeast—a day’s drive or less— people began flocking to Hilton Head Island for fun in the sun, golf, tennis, or just to enjoy the beauty of it all. The island enjoyed a competitive edge over other coastal resort towns, thanks to Fraser’s land planning philosophy based on extraordinary sensitivity to the natural environment, which other developers adopted as the community grew. There would be no rows of high-rises lining the beaches as in Miami Beach, for instance. Folks loved that they could come here and feel like they were communing with nature alongside enjoying the usual resort activities and amenities. Hilton Head Island was unique; it was special, and it was in demand. Naturally, with high demand comes opportunity, and the hospitality industry took notice of the lucrative opportunity
here. For decades, Hilton Head Island enjoyed status as an elite high-end destination with top-notch hotels and resorts dotting the island and prospering. But, just as naturally, things can change, and they did. Waves of new golf-oriented resorts, many of them also in coastal towns, stiffened the competition for golfers and beachgoers. It became harder and harder to fill the rooms, villas and homes. Then the economy took a turn for the worse in the mid-2000s, which certainly didn’t help the situation. Almost as if to add an exclamation mark, Verizon dropped its Heritage sponsorship and the island was at risk of losing the tournament and one of its most important marketing and public relations vehicles. Things looked pretty gloomy. But guess what? We’re back! Hilton Head Island is experiencing a renaissance, as Warren Woodard, director of sales and marketing at the Omni Hilton Head Oceanfront Resort referred to efforts by hospitality properties’ efforts to re-energize the industry. How important is that? When you consider that according to the Hilton Head Island-Bluffton Chamber of Commerce there are approximately 6,000 villas, 3,000 hotel rooms, and 1,000 timeshares (not to mention two RV resorts) on Hilton Head Island, it’s pretty important. “The investments and upgrades being made by the hotels have been a long time coming,” said Bob Hawkins of The Vacation Company, which manages some 250 shortterm rental villas and custom homes, “but it’s happening and the outlook is very good for all of us.” He is referring to recent major renovation projects at, for example, the Omni and Sonesta Resort Hilton Head Island (formerly the Hilton and Crown Plaza respectively) that have turned the fortunes around for what were underperforming properties. In a case of a rising tide lifting all boats, the hotels’ resurgence is trickling down into other segments like short-term rental. According to Hawkins, the short-term rental companies
are also making some investments in their properties, but of a different kind, because they cater to a different type of guest and also have to be responsive to the owners of the properties under their management. Short-term rental guests typically stay for a week or longer as opposed to 2-4 days for hotels. They’re looking for privacy and a home-away-fromhome atmosphere where the family can sit down to dinner at the kitchen table. “It’s a matter of waking up and being able to walk downstairs to meet in the kitchen or living room in your pajamas like at home,” said Tom Ridgway of Hilton Head Rentals & Golf, “or being able to make a home cooked dinner and still have that beautiful oceanfront view.” A short-term rental operation can also offer a wider variety of choices like beachfront or golf course views, and amenities like a private swimming pool. “Demands constantly change with regard to guest expectations,” said Ridgway. For example, and not surprisingly, several years ago highspeed Internet in all units became mission critical. Today it is even more important than cable TV, speaking of which, that TV had better be a hidefinition flat screen set. Ridgway also pointed out that in the short-term rental business, you have to be ready to help with everything from bike rentals to beach chairs to babysitters. “Guests will call to find out if there’s an ice cream shop nearby,” he said. Basically, the rental management company has to be their guests’ guide to Hilton Head Island. Obviously the Internet has also changed the way short-term rental management does business on a daily basis. Nearly 100 percent of bookings and reservations occur online, so sometimes rental agents never even speak to a guest until they arrive to check in, and more and more of those transactions originate from a mobile device or tablet. That is, guests can book a house or villa pretty much from anywhere and at any time, so the volume is much higher than it used to be when it was done mostly over the June
“It’s a matter of waking up and being able to walk downstairs to meet in the kitchen or living room in your pajamas like at home,” said Tom Ridgway of Hilton Head Rentals & Golf, “or being able to make a home cooked dinner and still have that beautiful oceanfront view.”
telephone. Today reservationists spend most of their phone time confirming, not taking, reservations and answering questions. “Another big change over the past two years is the ability to do more energy conservation in the homes,” Hawkens added. “We can monitor the thermostat remotely and make adjustments if a guest forgets to turn the air conditioning down when they leave. It’s the next big thing in the industry.” You might think that all those efficiencies brought on by technology would be bad news for rental company staffs, but it isn’t necessarily so, because efficiency breeds productivity. “Our per-agent activity is actually up,” Hawkins said. “Business has grown, so our staffing has stayed level.” The hotel segment is a little different. “The length of stay for us is usually 2-3 nights as opposed to the weeklong visits for rental,” said Chris Bracken, Sonesta’s director of marketing and sales. These guests are typically people who haven’t been to Hilton Head Island or have not been regular, repeat visitors, whereas rental guests tend to be regulars. “They’re checking it out.” Woodard added, “Our demo prefers to have a full-service environment.” That is, they like to have things like restaurants, concierge service, bike rentals, spas and so forth right on the premises. “They don’t want to have to get in the car and drive for everything.” The hotel segment is also well-equipped to serve the business market. “We get a lot of groups, conventions, and associations for meetings and things like that,” Bracken said. “A lot of them bring their families along and make a little vacation out of it.” Both agree that the recent re-investment in the island’s hotel properties is paying off. Sonesta, the Omni, and the Westin Hilton Head Island Resort & Spa as well have all undergone multi-million dollar renovations in recent years. “We closed down in fall of 2012 and spent about $30 million on renovations, then reopened in April 2013. So we’ve been here for about a year, and business is very strong. We’ll be in the 90 percent occupancy range through the summer,” Bracken said. Similarly, Woodard expects a strong Memorial Day to Labor Day season and beyond. “Our booking pace is excellent going into 2015.” Let the good news—and the tourists—keep coming, because we all know that as tourism goes around here, so goes Hilton Head Island. “It’s made a great story for the island,” Woodard said. And it is being seen in all sectors of the hospitality business: hotels, rental homes, and villas, which is good news for visitors of every accommodations preference. June
WHAT 2 DO When it’s nice outside & When it Rains ARTICLE BY DAISY DINGLEDORF // ARTWORK BY EMILY J. NOVITSKI
ooray! You made it. Now for the next seven days you can relax, have fun and take in all that the Lowcountry has to offer. Of course, as with any vacation, what type of activities you engage in will be somewhat dependent on the weather. Here on Hilton Head Island, we have three distinct weather patterns in the summer months: hot and sunny, hot and rainy and threat of hurricane. Let’s discuss how you can amuse yourself in each instance.
if you are on the south end of the island. For you north end beachgoer’s, we suggest the Westin’s Splash or Cocoa’s on the Beach near the Hilton Head Resort.
Most of the time, this is the weather you will have. The Lowcountry is known for sunny skies in the summer. You picked a great time to come!
Make a tee time Whether you’re a wannabe pro or a hack like Rodney Dangerfield in Caddyshack, we have the golf course for you. Play the famed Harbour Town Golf Links, where the RBC Heritage PGA tournament is held every April, or the Robert Trent Jones course in Palmetto Dunes for an ocean view on their signature hole 10. With a few kids in tow, your best bet may be mini-golf. Mini-people (age three and under) play free with a paying adult at Pirate’s Island Adventure Golf, near mile marker 8.
Go to the beach Let’s start with the most obvious. Even though you wouldn’t know it by driving down Hwy. 278, Hilton Head Island has over 12 miles of sand on which to set up camp. Load up your coolers, chairs, tents, wacky noodles, skim boards, magazines, etc. and just chill out for the day. When noon hits, you are officially allowed to start drinking, and several beach bars are available to help you take the edge off. The Tiki Hut (in The Beach House), Pool Bar Jim’s (Marriott’s Grande Ocean Resort) and the newly remodeled Sea Pines Beach Club are three of our favorites
Float in a boat There are a variety of ways to get out on the water, and since this is an island, you really should go on some sort of three-hour tour. If you’re the do-it-yourself type, a kayak or paddleboard rental is a serene, eco-friendly way to take in the flora and fauna. Live Oac and Outside Hilton Head are a few places you can rent such things—with or without a guide to show you around. If you would rather sit back and let someone else do all the work, try sailing on a catamaran with Captain John & Jeannie Zailckas of the Pau Hana and Flying Circus (Palmetto Bay Marina) or
What to do when it’s sunny & hot
ollow this advice to make your vacation as cool as the other side of the pillow.
Captain Blair of Live Oac (Hilton Head Harbor). You are almost guaranteed to see dolphins on any boating adventure, definitely a crowd pleaser for the little set. Hook something Fishing doesn’t necessarily mean catching, but the attempt is always fun. In early June, you can still catch the tail end of cobia season; but when the weather changes from warm to HOT, shark fishing is most common in local waters. The serious angler can find a day trip out to the Gulf Stream for a wider variety of sport fishing for barracuda, tarpon, Spanish mackerel and jack crevalle. A quick Google search is suggested to find the right boat and captain for your crew. A group of guys might not care if a charter boat is “head” less (boat-speak for “toilet”), but if you have women and children anglers, it may be a necessity. Go for a ride One of the best ways to see the island is on two wheels. With over 60 miles of bike paths available for exploration, it’s something the whole family can do while getting exercise in the process. The Sea Pines Forest Preserve is a hidden gem with lakes filled with alligators to observe. If you can find it, we recommend biking through. One word of caution; if you see a tiny red stop sign while on a bike path, it is for you, not the cars around you. Vehicles have the right of way on Hilton Head Island, so look both ways before you cross. Get a bird’s eye view The area’s newest tourist attraction is ZipLine Hilton Head at Broad Creek Marina. If you aren’t afraid of heights, we recommend you gear up and fly through the trees. An excellent way to spend a nice day. If you require a more sedate way to see the island, try climbing to the top of the Sea Pines Lighthouse in Harbour Town.
What to do when it’s rainy & hot Most afternoons in the summer months come complete with a pop-up thunderstorm. Think of this as nature’s way of telling you it’s time to get out of the sun for a few hours. Eat! Yes, that’s right. Stuff your face at one of over 200 restaurants. Watch the lightning while enjoying cocktails at a table overlooking the water, or find a cool local bar where you can play Golden Tee or pool. Hilton Head has a lively music scene too—check out our entertainment calendar on page 106 for a few more ideas. Get artistic Try strolling through an art gallery in Old Town Bluffton, or one of the many on Hilton Head Island. We recommend the Red Piano Art Gallery near the back gate to Sea Pines, The Walter Greer Gallery at the Arts Center of Coastal Carolina, or La Belle Image and Nash Gallery at Shelter Cove Harbour. There is something special about buying artwork on vacation as it becomes a story in itself. If you want to create your own pieces, we suggest a trip to The Art Café (ceramics) near the Sea Pines Circle or at Shelter Cove Harbour or Wine & Design (acrylic on canvas) right over the bridge in Bluffton.
1. Think Ahead and Save $$$ Planning a big trip to Europe next year? Apply for a credit card that rewards you with airline miles and other travel perks and start using it for all the items you have to buy every month anyway (think groceries, gas, bills, etc.). You may just get your airline tickets for free. 2. Roll your clothing It makes them easier to pack and keeps them from wrinkling. 3. Make a reservation for dinner before you leave home Sure, you don’t want to be too scheduled on your vacation, but if you plan on visiting a prime location in the height of tourist season, it pays to plan ahead. Otherwise you may find yourself eating at a less than desirable time – or restaurant. 4.Use Trip Advisor or Yelp! Ever shown up to your hotel to discover that it didn’t look anything like the photo they used on their website? Never again! Take advantage of free advice from fellow travelers on hotels and restaurants by downloading these information-sharing apps. 5.Ask for Suggestions With apps like Facebook, Twitter and Instagram, it’s easy to ask friends for advice on “must sees” in the place you are headed. Another good way to learn about the area you plan to visit is to LIKE the destination on Facebook or follow them on Twitter. 6. Make a List Start making your list several days before you plan to pack. This is when you are thinking most clearly about where you are going and what you will need. Phone charger. Check. Prescription medication. Check. Bathing suit. Check. Passport, AAA card and ID. Check, check, check!
(Continued on page 61) June
WHAT 2 DO ADVERTISER LISTINGS
The Bike Doctor 31 New Orleans Rd. or 55 Matthews Drive, Suite 160 843.681.7532 or 843.681.7531 www.bikedoctorhhi.com The Bike Doctor, voted best bike shop and best bike rentals, has been selling the best and servicing the rest since 1992. They have two island locations with bike sales, services and rentals. All rentals include free baskets, locks, delivery and pickup. Gullah Heritage Trail Tours (843) 681-3069 70 Honey Horn Road www.gullahheritage.com Gullah Heritage works to share the values of Gullah Culture with the world. Tour guides all of Gullah heritage, born and raised on Hilton Head Island before the bridge connection to the mainland, share their expertise with tour participants to provide the most accurate and engaging cultural experience. Brew Pub
Hilton Head Brewing Company 7C Greenwood Drive (Reilley’s Plaza) 843.785.3900 www.hhbrewingco.com South Carolina’s first microbrewery and restaurant can produce 2,000 barrels of beer annually. Patrons can dine inside the brew house pub or on the outside deck, complete with outdoor bar and TV. With 40 craft and 60
specialty beers on tap, and an extensive menu including tasty appetizers, wings, pizza, calzones, burgers, salads, and more, HHBC is a beer and food lover’s destination. Honey Baked Ham & Cafe 1060 Fording Island Rd. (Bluffton, next to Target) www.honeybakedham.com 843.815.7388 Great hams and turkey breasts, hand-crafted to provide that sweet crunchy glaze everyone loves. A large selection of side dishes, desserts and condiments are available. Great sandwiches and salads for dine in, take out or catering that special event. Island Bagel & Deli 841 William Hilton Parkway 843.686.3353 www.islandbagelanddeli.com Authentic NY Style boiled bagels in 16 flavors made from scratch daily on Hilton Head. Twelve handmade flavors of cream cheese, breakfast bagel sandwiches and a full line of Seattle’s Best coffees and espresso drinks. For lunch try the classic deli sandwiches, signature hoagies and the new Bacon Bagel Burger. The Jazz Corner The Village at Wexford www.thejazzcorner.com 843.842.8620 The intimate, elegant atmosphere of the Jazz Corner is the perfect setting to enjoy an evening of world-class entertainment enhanced by the innovative southern flavors presented on the menu and impeccable service. The Jazz Corner offers a signature martini menu, extensive wine list, full bar and late-night menu. Acclaimed as one of the TOP “100 Great Jazz Rooms” in the WORLD by Downbeat Magazine. Open nightly from 6:00 PM. June 2014
Be pampered Get a massage, manicure, pedicure, facial or whatever makes you feel relaxed and refreshed. Try Faces DaySpa in the Village at Wexford, Le Spa in Sea Pines Center, the newly remodeled Sanctuary in Park Plaza or the Westin’s Heavenly Spa Port Royal Plantation. Spa treatments are always more fun on vacation, because your mind isn’t swirling with what you have to do the minute you set foot outside those serene doors. Knock over some pins In other words, go bowling! Station 300 in Bluffton is the new local bowling alley, complete with arcade games for those who (continued on page 63)
WHAT 2 DO ADVERTISER LISTINGS
Live Oac Outdoor Adventure Company 43 Jenkins Rd. (Hilton Head Harbor) 888.254.8362 www.liveoac.com Hilton Head Island adventure professionals create on-water experiences customized for you: Watersports, fishing charters, dolphin watching, island touring, and more! Explore beautiful locations with skilled guides who have a passion for sharing the great outdoors. Their perfect location on HHI’s Skull Creek allows immediate access to the waters of Pinckney Wildlife Refuge. Rated #1 Watersports Adventures on HHI for 5 years running by TripAdvisor. June
Moss Creek Equestrian Center Moss Creek Plantation 843.816.7830 mosscreekequestrianctr.com Providing boarding, training, horse riding lessons and horsemanship skills since 1997. Capable, professional instructors welcome all riding abilities and ages. Let the Lowcountry-style barn and grass pastures, set in a pecan grove, combined with the warm staff, welcome you to our family-friendly environment! Easy access at the bridges to Hilton Head. Pau Hana & Flying Circus Palmetto Bay Marina 843.686.2582 hiltonheadislandsailing.com www.celebratehiltonhead.com 61
WHAT 2 DO
Pau Hana & Flying Circus
Explore local waters the environmentally friendly way with Captain John & Jeanie Zailckas of the Pau Hana. They have been providing unforgettable fun dolphin watch nature cruises on safe and stable catamaran sailboats since 1989. Whether it’s dolphin watching, daytime cruising, taking in a fabulous sunset, learning to sail with a private lesson, enjoying fireworks, or just getting together for clean, fresh fun, PAU HANA and FLYING CIRCUS are perfect for all ages. Pirate’s Island Golf 8 Marina Side Drive 843.686.4001 www.piratesislandgolf.com Rated on Trip Advisor as the top miniature golf course on Hilton Head Island, Pirates Island has two 18hole courses, one more challenging than the other, bound to satisfy any minigolfer’s preference. Situated under shady, towering oak trees, Pirates Island offers its customers an oasis on beautiful Hilton Head Island.
Zip Line Hilton Head Broad Creek Marina 843.682.6000 www.ziplinehiltonhead.com Get a bird’s eye view of the island with ZipLine Hilton Head or Aerial Adventure Hilton Head, two different high-flying adventures. The zip line tour includes eight interconnected zip lines with a dual cableracing finale for ages 10 and over. Aerial Adventure HH, a sky playground, features six different ability courses to thrill a five-year-old or a Marine. Finish your day with Up the Creek Pub & Grill, overlooking Broad Creek. Veritas 163 Bluffton Rd, Unit F 843.815.6900 www.veritasbluffton.com Chef/owner Tom Boland welcomes you to enjoy exciting seasonal dishes in an inviting atmosphere near Old Town Bluffton. Boland graduated Le Cordon Bleu, and his classical French training combined with years of fine dining experience has helped him create a unique menu that is complemented by a diverse wine list.
don’t want to don those fancy shoes. You can grab a burger and a beer while you bowl at their in-house restaurant, Zeppelins. Buy stuff Yes, we saved the best for last. Go shopping. If there is one thing we have an abundance of around here (besides restaurants), it is unique boutiques with things you won’t find in Ohio. Try Sea Pines Center, the Village at Wexford, Coligny Plaza and Old Town Bluffton for locally owned shops.
What to do when a hurricane threatens Now this happens several times a summer, and the Weather Channel gets very excited about this because lots of hurricanes equal news to report. Before you go getting too dramatic and packing your car to go home, wait to see how far away Tropical Storm Gustav is. There is a lot of East Coast out there for a swirling storm to hit, and the “strike zone” can change dramatically in just few days’ time. That said, in the event that Hilton Head Island issues a voluntary evacuation, you should probably hit the road. We’ll need the roads clear for locals who wait until it’s a mandatory evacuation. June
SUN-SAFE REDUCING KIDS’ SUN EXPOSURE LOWERS SKIN CANCER RISK LATER IN LIFE ARTICLE BY NAVNEET DILLON, MD
ith the warm weather and long days of summer finally here, people are spending more time outdoors. While many people are aware of the need to protect themselves from the sun, reducing children’s exposure to the sun’s harmful ultraviolet (UV) rays is especially important. In fact, teaching kids to be sun-safe now can benefit them for the rest of their lives. According to the U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), childhood sunburns are a risk factor for skin cancer. The Skin Cancer Foundation, a non-profit devoted to skin cancer education and prevention, offers a stark warning: Suffering one or more blistering sunburns in childhood or adolescence more than doubles a person’s chances of developing potentially-deadly melanoma later in life. Although skin cancer can be deadly, it is also highly preventable. Several simple precautions can reduce your children’s exposure to damaging UV radiation while still allowing them to enjoy the summer weather.
• Play in the shade: The sun’s UV rays are most intense between 10 a.m. and 4 p.m. Remind kids to play—or at least take breaks—in shaded areas in order to limit UV exposure. Getting out of the sun can also reduce their risk of heat illness. • Use sunscreen: Teach children to apply one ounce (about the size of a golf ball) of sunscreen to all exposed areas 30 minutes before outdoor activities. Teach them to cover areas such as the back of their ears and neck, and the tops of their feet and hands. Use a broad-spectrum sunscreen that protects against both UVA and UVB rays, with an SPF of 30 or higher. Reapply every two hours and especially after swimming or sweating. • Ban the tan: Like pink or burned skin, a tan is a sign of DNA damage to skin cells, a risk factor for developing skin cancer. Remind teens especially that tanning—whether sunbathing or using a tanning bed—increases skin cancer risk and also causes wrinkles and other skin blemishes.
SUN-SAFE Remind teens especially that tanning— whether sunbathing or using a tanning bed— increases skin cancer risk and also causes wrinkles and other skin blemishes. • Cover up: While tightly woven clothes provide the best protection against UV rays, wearing a T-shirt in the pool and outdoors provides more protection than wearing no shirt (for boys) or a two-piece bathing suit (for girls). Widebrimmed hats and sunglasses also help protect sensitive skin on the neck, face and around the eyes (for boys, a baseball cap is still better than no hat at all). • Be aware: A light cloud covering often doesn’t completely block UV rays, it may only diffuse them; it’s still possible to get sunburned on a cloudy day. In addition, concrete, sand and water can all reflect the sun’s rays, so reapply sunscreen any time you’re outdoors during peak hours. What’s important to remember is the leading risk factor for skin cancer is exposure to UV rays, whether from the sun or a tanning bed. The more exposure you have, the higher your risk. And because it’s virtually impossible to go through life with no sun exposure, we all have some level of risk.
Fortunately, you can lower your risk by reducing your exposure to the sun’s harmful rays. Children especially will benefit from learning how to protect their skin. Most important, these simple actions can be practiced beyond childhood into adulthood, enhancing sun safety and reducing skin cancer risk at any age. For more information about skin cancer risks, signs, symptoms and treatments, visit the Cancer Treatment Centers of America website at cancercenter.com/skin-cancer.
Navneet Dhillon, MD, is a medical oncologist at Cancer Treatment Centers of America at Southeastern Regional Medical Center in Newnan, Ga. Among her clinical specialties is treating people with melanoma.
The family that won our hearts and our business 10 years running!
n some circles, getting good air means launching off a ramp with a skateboard or snowboard under your feet and doing some serious hang-time before coming back down to earth. For T.J. Anderson, owner of Atlantic Spray Foam, getting good air stems from providing homeowners and businesses with the healthiest and highest performing spray insulation system available today; and business is getting some impressive hang-time. Utilizing the safest, healthiest, and highest performing forms of spray insulation on the market, Atlantic Spray Foam is improving energy efficiency and air quality with made-in-the-USA, Dimilec. With a GREENGUARD® Certification, earned for its high degree of renewability and recyclability, Dimilec is removing dust and allergens from the air, all while keeping Anderson’s clients green. “We’re growing rapidly,” Anderson said. “We’re at about 50 percent more business today than we were this time last year.” In addition to offering some of the most efficient and environmentally-conscious products on the market, he said, “I attribute our growth to our honesty and our reputation. I tell people what they need to hear, not what they want to hear. I believe the economy is coming back and it’s coming back pretty strong. People want to do more energy efficient improvements, and people are hearing about us. We’re doing work in a lot of existing homes, so we’re getting a lot of referrals from those homeowners. People are hearing about us and hearing about our good work and referring us to other customers. People trust us, and that goes a long way.”
Photography by AnNE
& Morgan the dog
A big component of the success at Atlantic Spray Foam is the level of ongoing training their technicians receive. According to Anderson, the insulation manufacturers are always looking to make material improvements, and are committed to keeping their customers informed. “The Dimilec rep comes at least every month-and-a-half and spends a couple of days with my guys on continuing education on the process and the product. They do on-site training with them from the chemical make-up to the materials.” The commitment to a team where every member has a good depth of knowledge about the process and the products has led Anderson to hire Matthew Humphries. Humphries was brought on to expand their sales force capabilities, but has spent the past six months learning the business from the foam up. “I wanted him to learn how to spray; that way he knows what he’s talking about when he’s working with the customers,” Anderson said. The manufacturers are a big part of training new employees as well. “Any time I hire a new employee, they [manufacturers] come down and work with my guys. They certify everyone through the manufacturer,” Anderson said. Getting good air seems to run in the Anderson household. T.J.’s nine year old son Bradlee is keeping the family busy filling his sails with good air, as the one of the youngest members of the South Carolina Yacht Club Junior’s traveling team. Reaching that stage in a family’s life, T.J. and his wife Rachel are seeing Bradlee’s independent enthusiasm for the sport and his skill at it growing and reaping rewards. “He’s been on
Article by Kitty Bartell
Design by CATHERINE DAVIES
Matthew Humphries, the newest addition to the Atlantic Sprayfoam Sales Team.
boats since he was two months old, and he loves the water. When he gets out there, he’s a natural at it,” Anderson said. “He took a class at Windmill Harbour (home of the South Carolina Yacht Club) two summers ago, and this past year they asked him to come out. They wanted him to try-out and see what he could do. He’s on the team, and he loves it. We are travelling to regattas throughout the summer and into the fall.” Anderson says this summer they will be hauling Bradlee and his Optimist boat, named the Patricia Gale after his late grandmother, to Wrightsville Beach, North Carolina, Charleston, Beaufort, and Augusta in the fall. “We make it a family affair,” he said, with Rachel and their son Turner joining the crew. Anderson grew up with
parents who encouraged his own dreams and hopes he is doing the same for Bradlee. “My parents were business owners too. I was offered the opportunity to join their business. I didn’t want to do what they were doing. They didn’t push me to do it. My mother said, whatever makes you happy, go do it.” “I think he [Bradlee] will be on a boat somewhere. Once he graduates from college I can see him being a captain,” Anderson said. Despite his own affinity for powerboats, Anderson said, “We’re getting into it, and we know there are scholarships out there. Obviously that’s down the road a bit, but that’s our ultimate goal as parents.” The Andersons encourage Bradlee to look to the older sailors for inspiration, “Hopefully because he’s so young he’ll have a jump start.” Getting good air can lift the skateboarder to new heights. At Atlantic Spray Foam good air will fill your home and your lungs with the most pure atmosphere possible; and filling his sails on the open water will power Bradlee Anderson’s boat and quite possibly his dreams. Getting good air is a very good thing. Atlantic Spray Foam is located at 49 Browns Cove Road, Suite A2, Ridgeland. For more information, visit atlanticsprayfoam.net or call (843) 441-6690.
“Totally terrific...It is such fun!!” - The New York Times
The Arts Center’s Summer Musical is High-Octane Fun!
omewhere in America’s heartland, between Frog Level and Smyrna, North Carolina, stands a roadside slice of heaven, for those who need a good rest from their highway travels. The four hard-working fellas at the gas station -Jim, Jackson, Eddie and L.M. -- have been known to do some auto repairs, but only when aided by ample quantities of time, great tunes and a few beers while they’re at it. And right next door, there’s a roadside eatery, the Double Cupp Diner, where the lovely Cupp sisters, Prudie and Rhetta, celebrate their famous home cooking and gift for song with the same zeal they bring to their kinship with the boys. To look at it, you wouldn’t know that this little stop on Highway 57 is where all
the action is, but trust us – once the boys get that guitar and bass fiddle revved up, you won’t want to be anywhere else. The Arts Center’s summer show, running June 17 – July 27, Pump Boys and Dinettes is a delightful hybrid of concert and musical theatre, wherein the actors are also the musicians and play an exuberant blend of country, rock and pop music, making it a toe-tappin’ good time for the whole family! Directing the Arts Center’s production is the talented Robert Farley, co-founder of the Georgia Ensemble Theatre and Conservatory and its Artistic Director since its inception in 1992. “This show is so much fun, I couldn’t wait to bring it to our stage,” enthused Kathi Bateson, CEO/President of the Arts Center. “I know everyone is going to have a fabulous time hanging out with the ‘the Cupp sisters and the boys!’” Pump Boys premiered Off-Broadway at the Chelsea West Side Arts Theatre on July 10, 1981, transferring to the Colonnades
Theatre in October of that year. It opened on Broadway at the Princess Theatre on Feb. 4, 1982, where it played 573 performances and was nominated for both Tony and Drama Desk Awards for Best Musical. A Broadway revival is in the works, so it’s sure to come back to the Great White Way. For now, however, you can see it in the intimate surroundings of the Arts Center, and with just as much enjoyment (for – dare we say it – one-fourth the price)! With heartache and hilarity, they perform the stories of their lives on guitars, piano, bass and even kitchen utensils. Pump Boys and Dinettes is a love song to family, friends and fried chicken. Single Tickets will be on sale beginning May 19. Preview tickets June 1719 are $34 for adults and $24 for children 4-15; from June 20 on, regular tickets are $44 for adults and $31 for children. Purchase tickets now by calling the Box Office at (843) 842-ARTS (2787) or go online to www.artshhi.com.
effrey Mingledorf and Nicky Fenner first met in a carpool when they were in elementary school. When his family moved a couple years later, they lost touch and didn’t reconnect until high school. Nicky happened to be up early one morning fishing across from the gas dock when she saw Jeffrey and his family come in to fuel their boat. She went to go say hello, and most of them did not recognize her without braces and oversized glasses. The couple dated for the first
time that school year but then broke it off because Nicky got scared that the relationship was going too well. They remained friends throughout college and finally reached a point of decision: to date or to discontinue the friendship. Nicky put away her fears, and they started dating again on St. Patrick’s Day 2011. A little less than two years later, Nicky was diagnosed with cancer. It was the scariest moment of her life and Jeffrey’s as well. A month later, on St. Patrick’s Day 2013, on a sunset boat ride, Jeffrey
proposed, less than two weeks before Nicky’s first chemotherapy treatment. With six months of chemotherapy ahead, the couple decided to marry the following May. They chose the Savannah Yacht Club as their wedding venue and planned to leave by boat since so many memories had already been made on boats. The wedding color scheme included navy blue to fit the nautical theme and lavender to match the Hodgkin’s lymphoma ribbon in honor of Nicky’s victory over the disease last year.
FOR MEN ONLY If you have boobs please turn the page. DO NOT READ. ARE YOU
HAVE YOU BEEN MARRIED BEFORE?
THE KNOT? START BELOW
HOW OLD ARE YOU?
I LOVE HER AND I CAN’T IMAGINE MY LIFE WITHOUT HER IN IT.
HOW LONG HAVE YOU BEEN
YOUR GIRLFRIEND’S FAMILY COMES INTO TOWN FOR THE WEEKEND UNEXPECTEDLY. YOU ...
UM… IS THAT BAD?
DO YOU AND YOUR PARENTS SHARE THE SAME ADDRESS?
B – MAKE SURE YOU HAVE TO “WORK” ALL WEEKEND. AND BY “WORK” YOU MEAN GOLFING WITH YOUR BUDDIES.
BUY THAT RING.
IS YOUR EX-WIFE AN OBSTACLE TO YOUR FUTURE HAPPINESS?
DOES YOUR CURRENT GIRLFRIEND LOVE YOUR KIDS AS IF THEY WERE HER OWN?
DO YOU HAVE THE SAME LIFE GOALS?
NO, BUT I’M TRYING TO CHANGE HER FEELINGS ABOUT HAVING CHILDREN.
WHY ARE YOU STILL WITH HER?!?
YOU FOUND A KEEPER!
BETTER PROPOSE BEFORE SOMEONE ELSE GRABS HER.
SIGN HER UP FOR MATCH.COM. HOOK HER UP WITH A FRIEND, WHATEVER! AIN’T NOBODY GONNA BE HAPPY 'TIL MOMMA IS HAPPY. SORRY.
SHE’S OUT THERE SOMEWHERE. YOU JUST HAVE TO FIND HER. MAYBE JOIN OUR 2015 BACHELOR LIVE HAPPILY OF THE YEAR CONTEST AND EVER AFTER. LET PEOPLE KNOW YOU ARE LOOKING! WHY DO YOU WANT TO GET MARRIED AGAIN? THE ODDS ARE AGAINST YOU. 67% OF SECOND DO YOU MARRIAGES FAIL. PLENTY OF FISH IN THE SEA. JUST SAYIN’. WANT KIDS? THIS MESSAGE SPONSORED BY WWW.LADYFISH.COM BETTER GET ON IT! YOUR BIOLOGICAL CLOCK IS TICKING TOO. DO YOU REALLY WANT TO BE 70 WHEN YOUR KID GRADUATES FROM COLLEGE?
POP THE . QUESTION
LOST CAUSE. MOVE ON.
DESIGN BY KELLY STROUD
GO AHEAD BUDDY!
YOU’RE NOT READY.
IT IS BIOLOGICALLY POSSIBLE THAT THE WOMEN I DATE COULD BE MY DAUGHTERS.
GET YOUR ACT TOGETHER AND TRY NEXT YEAR.
ARE YOU CURRENTLY IN A SERIOUS RELATIONSHIP?
I DATE WOMEN MY AGE.
A – CANCEL YOUR PLANS TO SPEND MORE TIME WITH YOUR FUTURE-INLAWS BECAUSE YOU KNOW IT’S IMPORTANT TO HER.
REVISIT “WHY NOT?” ADMITTING YOU HAVE A PROBLEM IS HALF THE BATTLE.
THE DEFINITION OF INSANITY IS DOING THE SAME THING OVER AND OVER AND EXPECTING DIFFERENT RESULTS. YOU AREN’T GOING TO MEET HER HUNTING IN THE WOODS WITH YOUR BUDDIES, AT THE SAME OLD SPORTS BAR OR ON YOUR COUCH. TRY A YOGA CLASS. OR MAYBE A BLIND DATE THROUGH MUTUAL FRIENDS.
WHAT IS THE AVERAGE AGE OF THE WOMEN YOU DATE?
I WANT TO START A FAMILY.
GOOD ANSWER. YOU MAY NOW KISS THE BRIDE.
SEEMS LIKE FOREVER
LESS THAN ONE YEAR.
I HAVEN’T MET THE ONE.
I WANT TO GET MARRIED BECAUSE…
DO YOU HAVE
WHEN YOU MEET THE RIGHT WOMAN YOU WILL WANT TO MAKE HER YOUR WIFE. NO ULTIMATUMS REQUIRED.
50% OF THE TIME IT WORKS OUT OK.
DO THE RIGHT THING. GO AHEAD AND GET MARRIED.
STOP. REVISIT FLOW CHART IN A YEAR.
MY GIRLFRIEND GAVE ME AN ULTIMATUM.
I HAVE COMMITMENT ISSUES.
Why are you even taking this quiz? You are going to die alone. But you already know that and are fine with your choice. Turn to Page 106 for which bar you should hang out at tonight.
IS SHE PREGNANT?
Article By Becca Edwards
ying the knot is bound to both ageold and contemporary customs. For example, do you know the origin of the term “best man?” Apparently, in ancient times, men would capture women to make them their brides. To help with this “romantic” endeavor, the groom-to-be would take along his strongest and most trusted friend—aka his best man—to help him fight resistance from the woman’s family. More modern (and less brutish) practices include Martha Stewart-inspired ideas like the cupcake stand/wedding cake or the obligatory dance-o-rama to Kool & the Gang’s “Celebration.” Like a volatile couple, at times old and new beliefs coincide; other times they collide. One such touchy tradition forbids cohabitation and premarital sex. From a theological standpoint, some feel a moral obligation to their God and religious writings like Hebrews 13:4—“Let marriage be held in honor among all, and let the marriage bed be undefiled.” From a historical (and tender) standpoint, the father walks the bride down the aisle to signify the transition of his daughter from one “house” to another—a sentiment for
some that becomes moot if the bride and groom already live under the same roof. “But what about from a practical standpoint?” you might ask. In 2009, the Washington Post published, “Study Links Cohabitation before Marriage to Greater Potential for Divorce,” and featured the research of Scott Stanley, a University of Denver psychologist. Stanley has spent nearly two decades dedicated to figuring out why premarital cohabitation is associated with lower levels of satisfaction in marriage (especially in men) and a greater potential for divorce. His most recent five-year study estimated that between 60 and 70 percent of couples today will live together before marriage, and for two-thirds of them, cohabitation is something that they slid into or “just sort of happened.” In another report Stanley found that of the 1,050 married people surveyed, almost 19 percent of those who lived together before getting engaged had at some point suggested divorce, compared with 10 percent for those who waited until marriage to live together. Stanley calls this a problem of inertia. “Living together, mingling finances and completely intertwining your lives makes it
harder to break up than if you’d stayed at separate addresses,” he said. According to Greg Kronz, Sr. Pastor at St. Luke’s Church, the majority of the couples he facilitates live together prior to walking down the aisle. “Quite often I ask them why they moved in together, and they list economic reasons,” said Rev. Kronz, who has been providing premarital and marriage counseling for 29 years. “I then ask them, ‘What if I told you I’d pay you to kill someone or buy drugs for me?’ and they seem shocked and surprised. That’s when I point out, ‘but doesn’t making money make economic sense, too?’” Kronz considers “objective morality” to be a critical issue, and he says that some erroneously believe that God’s moral laws change with the times. “We play games to qualify and quantify whatever is socially acceptable to make it right,” he said. He goes on to say that three possible sources govern moral decision making: others (peer groups, experts and the majority), our self (for pleasure, personal happiness or self-actualization) or God. “So then we must ask what or who is influencing us to make these objective moral decisions?”
“Traditional values, God’s values, never change,” said Kronz’s wife Meredith. “They are the same yesterday, today and forever. God’s rules are for our benefit, not our detriment.” A mother of three, she speaks from the heart and from experience when she speaks against premarital cohabitation. “Our daughter lived with her (now ex-) boyfriend for over a year. They even talked about getting engaged, but when she was having some health challenges he left her. It was almost like she just wasn’t fun and cute to him anymore,” Meredith said. Devastated then, their daughter is now thankful because she says she learned a valuable lesson. When it came to her next successful relationship, she waited until after the “I dos” to live happily ever after in the same home. “And she is so much healthier and happier!” Meredith said. Some might argue, though, this is exactly why couples should move in together—to have a dress rehearsal of sorts. “I think any couple that decides to move in with each other expects all the good, but I do not think anyone is truly ready to see the bad and the ugly!” said Christina Rinaldi, who lives with her fiancée Benjamin Harris and is looking forward to her fall wedding. “I always thought the idea of playing house and being a little Susie homemaker was going to be loads of fun and easy, but it’s not. It’s the days when you’re in a bad mood or just want to be alone that make it the most challenging. The little day-today chores are minor compared to family feuds, hormones and other personal and sensitive subjects that you’re not ready to talk about. That’s why I think it is so important to know exactly what you’re walking into and that you both have a clear view of the future.” Kalina Zaryczny agrees. She lived with her now husband John Tolerton a year before their May 2013 wedding. “Living together before marriage is a beautiful thing,” she said. “It allows each partner to lay out what they are willing and not willing to compromise. It was a sticker shock for John when he started buying organic, natural, unprocessed foods, but he knew it wasn’t something I was willing to compromise.” Zaryczny and Tolerton waited until after he proposed to move in together—an important step and component of Stanley’s research. Stanley’s studies have shown there’s almost no difference in marital satisfaction between couples who moved in together after they got engaged and those who did it after their wedding day. Plus, as a blended family Zaryczny and Tolerton had to consider the best way to transition Tolerton’s two young sons. “I had no experience with children with the exception of the volunteer work I’ve done and a small amount of time with my nephew,” Zaryczny explained. “My husband and stepsons were really courageous. They allowed me to come into their lives and make changes. My husband was extremely receptive. I believe the year leading up to our wedding helped the boys to transition better.” And finally there is a feeling of conflict between those parents who live by tradition and their children who want to break from it. Rinaldi, who was raised Roman Catholic, was surprised that both of her parents seemed okay with her living with Harris before the big day; but a survey conducted for this article revealed not everyone is so lucky. A few people even hid it from their parents to which Meredith pointed out, “And why would they do that—is it shame, maybe?” It seems this contention even places a black cloud over some would-behappy couples’ courtship. The underlying truth, according to Rev. Kronz is that there are four powerful components to a successful and loving union: the physical, the emotional, the intellectual and the spiritual. He believes we spend so much time and energy focused on the physical—losing weight for the big day or giving into temptation. “But what about our intellectual life? And more important, what about our spiritual life?” he asked. “I encourage couples to build their spiritual life. If I love God, that love with spill over to my wife. And if she loves God, that will spill over to our children and the cycle continues.” 88
e i z n e k ac
exter and Mackenzie Lamb each moved to Hilton Head after graduating from their respective colleges and found jobs at Bonefish Grill. After several months of working together, and several rejected date invitations, Dexter’s persistence finally paid off. Mackenzie made the best decision of her life: to give him a chance. The rest is history. After a few fun-filled years living on Hilton Head Island, Dexter and Mackenzie moved to St. Louis, Mackenzie’s hometown. A year after that, with permission from Mackenzie’s father of course, the two were engaged. Dexter being from Michigan and Mackenzie from Missouri, family and friends June
were spread out all over the country, which made choosing a wedding venue difficult. They ultimately chose Hilton Head because it was where they met and fell in love. The couple wanted their wedding entirely outdoors—weather permitting, which it did. Mackenzie was going for a bohemian chic look for the ceremony and reception. She envisioned vibrant flowers, fresh greenery, twinkly lights and an unforgettable party. The ceremony was held at the Reflection Pond at Berkeley Hall. Guests were transported from The Westin on chartered buses and were treated to the most stunning view when they arrived.
Mackenzie and Dexter’s favorite element of the ceremony setup was that their parents were seated just a few feet behind where they stood, separated from all the rest of the guests, making it extraordinarily intimate. After the ceremony, buses took the guests to the Berkeley Hall Clubhouse where they were greeted in the main lobby with signature cocktails in the couple’s wedding colors, coral and mint. Guests were then escorted out the back of the clubhouse onto a manicured lawn for a romantic and unforgettable celebration underneath a clear tent with sparkling lights. www.celebratehiltonhead.com 93
Article by kitty Bartell
a better spouse
he longer I am married the less certain I am about what makes for a good marriage or a bad one. Let’s just say we’re honing in on our pearl anniversary. I attribute this to the amazing nature of marriage. My experience has been one of love and passion, friendship and adventure, anger and frustration, peace and safety, and I wouldn’t have done it any differently. Despite the years that are behind us, I hope for many more ahead, which will give me time to keep getting better at it. So what follows are a few things I have learned along the way, most of which I am still working on. Whether you have been married for decades or days, being a better spouse should begin with one mission: keep your marriage intimate. Imagine your marriage is an egg, and what goes on inside that egg should stay inside that egg. Moments of intimacy that elicit honesty, humility, and passion are fragile, and require a lifetime of encouragement. The longer you are married, and the more confidence you gain in each other’s ability to put the marriage before any other relationship, the stronger your shell will be.
Don’t talk about your spouse’s faults and flaws with your mother or your brother, your stylist or your buddies at the gym. Showing up to the family picnic with steam coming out of your ears, announcing that your mate is stupid, ignorant, or disappointing, or mate-bashing over beers will weaken the relationship. You may not see it right away, but these uncomfortable little public take-downs will cause small cracks, leading to big cracks, in what is designed to protect you both. But really, we do all need to let off some steam now and then, and sans a therapist on speed dial, I recommend carefully selecting trustworthy, discrete confidants. Don’t bring your issues to the party. Show up as a team and work out the squabbles privately. It takes bravery to show your whole self, especially your vulnerabilities and flaws; you shouldn’t need to defend yourself against your bride or your groom. The reward for your discretion will be a stronger shell, protecting your relationship from the stormy weather that inevitably comes and goes. Onto the slippery slope of trust. Does being a better spouse mean I have to tell him everything!? The actual cost of
For many couples, families present some challenges. In-laws are part of the deal: mothers, fathers, grandparents, sisters, brothers, aunts, uncles, cousins—family members will both test and bless your marriage my new purse? The truth about the highly questionable color of her new hair color? What I ate standing in front of the refrigerator at 3 a.m.? From my experience, the answer is yes. Truth resides on a bit of a sliding scale these days; however, I have found that even if the truth is a bit embarrassing, or hard to take, it is critical in a marriage. Plenty of people in your world will hedge the truth; it’s nice when you can be pretty certain that it’s not your spouse. Believe me, I know plenty of women who talk about hiding the evidence of their latest shopping spree, and men who tell tales of their misadventures, and maybe their marriages are just fine. However, speaking the truth about what’s important to you, even if that’s via an unplanned purchase or an unexpected exploit that called to your imagination, or sense of adventure, or sense of humor, it teaches your spouse something about you. Why would you want to hide that? It’s exciting to really know someone; and in a way it sets you free. Having nothing to hide makes room for plenty of other kinds of excitement and adventure. Understanding each other by the way we spend our time and our money is a pathway to good rapport. Never discount anything as out-of-the-question. Just because your mother avoids fishing or your dad refuses to step inside a tea house doesn’t mean you have to follow in their footsteps. Cutting yourself off from something that is important to your spouse limits you and limits your bond. Of course, that doesn’t mean that he shouldn’t go off for his all-guy weekend of golf, or you shouldn’t spend the day at the beach with your peeps. Being better translates to staying interesting by staying interested. Derogatory comments make you petty and provincial. Wouldn’t you rather be witty and cosmopolitan? Delight him by learning how to gut and clean his catch. Surprise her with a hot oil massage expertly administered in the comfort of your own nest. Stay engaged and interested in each other’s lives. You’re going to be so much better. Being aú courant also makes marriage more fun: read the newspaper, listen to NPR, know what’s trending. Always have a high-level overview of what’s happening in your world and you will have something better to talk about than budgets and schedules. For those about to be married, talk about everything before your wedding: religion, money, children, pets, holidays, work, where you are going to live, goals, dreams, and family. Take each topic seriously and share honestly.
What you share doesn’t have to be set in stone, but if what you are hearing raises any red flags, now is the time to talk it out; you’re forming the foundation of your marriage. For many couples, families present some challenges. Inlaws are part of the deal: mothers, fathers, grandparents, sisters, brothers, aunts, uncles, cousins—family members will both test and bless your marriage. Talk honestly about your families before the wedding. Be a better spouse right out of the gate by speaking respectfully and with generosity about their assets and idiosyncrasies, and with humor about their faults. It may be hard for some of the in-laws to accept that the teams are changing. You and your spouse are stepping out of the family minivans and into your own sporty twoseater; speeding off into a new life. Being a better spouse means staying close to those you care about, but making your partner number one. The ingredients of a good marriage are as varied as the number of couples in the world, so remember, there will be times when all you can do is cling to each other for dear life to ride out a storm; there will be times of sheer joy, and there will be plenty of days that fall somewhere in between. Just remember we each have the power to make or break any day, any hour, or any moment by what we say and how we treat each other. My wish is that you make it through with as few cracks in your shell as possible.
Article by Erin Wasem
ELA’s’ Guide to
espite attending numerous wedding, you probably haven’t paid much attention to how long each individual aspect lasts. At ELA’s, we have it down to a science. Here are our tips for keeping your wedding moving, without feeling rushed or ending up with weird chunks of time where nobody knows what to do. First, it’s important to note that timelines are simply a suggested guideline for the day. Starting and ending the wedding on time is key; and while hitting everything in between in order is important, you usually have to adjust a little to the particular set of people and circumstances. Maximum gap between ceremony and reception: One hour. Any more than that, and we recommend suggesting places for your guests to visit between the ceremony and cocktail hour. Ideal reception length: Six hours. This allows an hour for cocktails, two hours for dinner, and three hours for dancing.
Order of Events First dance: The most common timing is immediately after the bride and groom enter the reception, but you
can also do your first dance following the conclusion of dinner or right after dessert. Father/daughter dance: Immediately following the first dance. Mother/son dance: Immediately following the father/daughter dance. Or, sometimes, this dance is shared with the father/daughter dance. Welcome toast: Given by the father of the bride or by the bride and groom. First course (salad/appetizer) served Toasts: Ladies first! Start with the maid of honor, followed by the best man. Second course (main course) served Toasts: The bride and groom can give a toast here, if desired. Guests invited to dance: Open up the dance floor, and get the party started! Cake cutting: Two hours before the reception ends. However, other couples opt to cut the cake following their introduction or the toasts in order to ensure that all guests see the cake being cut. This also eliminates one more obligation throughout the night for the bride and groom. Bouquet and garter tosses: Right after the cake cutting, or about two hours before the end of the reception.
Late-night snacks: Many couples start passing around bite size snacks at this point to refuel guests. Farewell: If you’re doing a sparkler farewell, for example, have guests start lining up about 10 minutes before you plan to exit. Invite time vs. start time The “invite” time is the time on your invitation. The earliest guests will show up is about half an hour before this, so be prepared for that. And no matter the size of your guest list, you can put money on the fact that ten of them will be around ten minutes late, even if they’re all staying down the street from the venue. Do yourself a favor and plan on starting the ceremony fifteen minutes after your invite time. Food timing Timing for dinner depends largely on 1) what type of food service you’re having and 2) how large your guest list is. It takes about 20 minutes for 100 guests to get through a buffet. Plated courses are usually spaced about 45 minutes apart. And family style also
takes about 15-20 minutes for 100 guests to be served. Plan accordingly—we suggest starting with a minimum of bread on the table to give guests something to snack on while they wait for their turn at the food, although plated salads are also a great way to start out an otherwise buffet meal for the same reason. Always discuss timing with whoever is serving your food—they should have the best idea for your particular menu. Toasts We encourage people to do toasts during dinner—so you don’t have to carve separate time out of the day for them to happen… and your guests are much more tuned in at this point. It’s a good idea to make sure to tell the catering staff that they should continue to serve/clear/etc. while people are speaking (they’re good at doing this discreetly). Sunset Note what time it’s going to happen! You’re going to want to think about lighting, especially if your event is happening partially outdoors. Portraits/photos Many couples do formal portraits before the ceremony, because otherwise you’re stuck wrangling people during cocktail hour. But a couple should also consider a second set of portraits right before sunset—the light is totally different, and you’re finally married and much more relaxed! You really only need to budget 10-15 minutes for these, and you should plan on it being just the two of you and your primary photographer. This mini session also has the added benefit of giving you a short break away from the crowd. Cake/dessert timing Traditionally it’s considered acceptable to leave a wedding once the cake has been cut— at that point you know that nothing else major is going to happen (except for your cousin doing the worm). So if you plan for it to happen later in the evening, keep this and your older guests in mind. Last call You don’t have to make it official, but it can be a helpful sign to people that they should start preparing to leave. Breakdown If your venue has strict timing rules, or noise restrictions, or you’re paying a staff hourly and they’re going to go into overtime or time-and-a-half at some point, don’t forget about breakdown. While generally faster than set up, give yourself and hour… maybe even two! Think about all of the things that are going to need to happen once the lights go on and how much time that will take, and plan the end of the night accordingly. At ELA’s Blu Water Grille, private function space is available for receptions of eight to 88 people. Our chef and catering professionals are available to plan and guide you, utilizing numerous resources and years of industry experience when planning your special day. Give us a call at (843) 785-3030 or visit us online at elasgrille.com.
Garvin House/Bluffton, SC
Promoting and Preserving A Town’s Past
alls do talk; so do streets, homes and collectively, a town. Carolyn Coppola is giving Bluffton its voice back through a new non-profit called Celebrate Bluffton. “Bluffton’s history and heritage emerges from family members passing down stories; however, there is no linear written record to document the story of its people and places. Celebrate Bluffton’s mission is to change that,” Coppola said. Now a Bluffton resident, Coppola’s love affair with Bluffton started years ago when her family came down from the Hudson Valley area of New York to vacation. “The minute I got off the plane, I felt I was home,” she said. “It was an instant connection and I was totally absorbed with Bluffton’s natural beauty, wildlife and, of course, its history.” Coppola’s journey to document Bluffton’s past started when she went to Savannah College of Art and Design for a college visit for her son Alex. At the intersection of a possible career change from the software industry, Coppola sat in an orientation session and told herself, “I need to go here.” Twenty-five years after her first
Article by Debbie Szpanka II Photography by butch hirsch
college experience, she enrolled and her son did not. Last year, Coppola graduated with a master’s of fine arts degree in historic preservation. After ruining some of clothes with the yellow dust and long hours in archive rooms while interning at Savannah’s historic homes and being absorbed in the process of incorporating
First Zion Church
the stories of slaves into a city’s history, Coppola combined her love of Bluffton and her love of history to birth a new nonprofit and a personal mission. “New facts and stories are surfacing all the time, so research never ends. History is not static. Celebrate Bluffton
is a hub for people to celebrate what they know about Bluffton’s past and a gathering place for new information as it emerges, collected and shared,” Coppola said. “While many know the headlines of Bluffton’s past, its full story is still coming to the surface. “In Bluffton, we aren’t interpreting one building, one site or one family’s story; we are reinterpreting an entire town. In doing so, we are telling a story. What makes Bluffton special is that much of that town still exists as it was. So many towns and cities no longer exist as they were because of the destruction of the Civil War, destruction of Mother Nature or destruction of man’s need to build anew.” Heritage Trail One of Celebrate Bluffton’s main projects is to create a heritage trail which will cover all of Bluffton, not just Old Town Bluffton. The Heritage Trail app is being designed so that people can explore Bluffton by foot, car, bike or golf cart. Scheduled for its debut in six months, the app will be a “living organism” and continue to grow as more information becomes available. “As people visit sites June 2014
on the trail, they will be introduced to the people and events that shaped the Bluffton of today,” Coppola said. “We expect our work to protect and promote Bluffton’s cultural resources.” One Bluffton site which is garnering statewide attention is the Garvin House, which sits on the May River, across from Oyster Factory Park. It is now being held together with cribbing or pressure treated wood so it doesn’t cave in on itself before it can be further preserved. As much as Bluffton officials know, the Garvin House is the only structure still existing on the May River that was owned by a former slave, and it gives a rare peek into what life was like during the Reconstruction Era. It is believed that Cyrus Garvin built the house in 1870 after he was freed as a slave from Joseph Baynard. Prior to Garvin building that house, it is believed that Joseph Baynard’s plantation house stood on that site before the infamous, “Burning of Bluffton,” which happened June 4, 1863. The house, now surrounded by protective fencing, is awaiting funds and resources to restore its structure as well as its voice so it can continue to tell its story of why, how and who existed in it years ago. “Slaves and their masters lived in very close proximity on the small lots in Bluffton, and this created avenues for the transmission of cultural heritage and property from former plantations,” Coppola said. “Once you know the stories, a stroll through Bluffton becomes a deeper, richer experience as you imagine our past residents living and working on the same streets and homes we see today.” While the Garvin house is the only structure still existing that was owned by a former slave, much of the property in Bluffton was owned by confederate soldiers and plantation owners. The site of the Pine House, located on Boundary
The Squire Pope Carriage House, is located in Bluffton, South Carolina. It was built in 1850 and joined in 1865. The house originally served as the carriage house and outbuildings for the summer house of Squire William Pope.
Ý Carolyn Coppola, executive director of Celebrate Bluffton.
Street, now owned by Joan Heyward, was once the home of Confederate General Thomas F. Drayton. The house that stands on the property today was built in 1903 and rehabilitated in 2006. In 1943, Gaillard and Lucille Heyward purchased the property, and it has stayed in the long-established Bluffton family since. This house is an example of a property which has lived many lifetimes and has stories to tell about each. “Originally, Thomas F. Drayton owned the property. He and his wife owned two other plantations in greater Bluffton and on Hilton Head Island, so the Pine House property was a central location to manage both plantations,” Coppola said. The stories of these two homes will be included on the Trail. The future of the past Celebrate Bluffton’s board of directors consists of dynamic professionals who deeply care about the town. The board includes a retired advertising executive, a Ph.D. in anthropology, a certified public accountant, a professor of fine arts, a historic preservationist, a business owner and a non-profit professional. Beyond the Heritage Trail, the organization will be a hub for resources and information about how to preserve historic properties. The board members and staff members hope to help current owners shore up their properties so the past can be preserved into the future. “Bluffton is such a unique town and experience; we all need to be stewards of this gift,” Coppola said.
S Charbar Co.- Join us for half price happy hour from 4-7PM.
Frosty FrogPitts n’ Core (Sundays; 6:3010:30PM)
Charbar Co.- Join us for half price happy hour from 4-7PM. Mike Wilson & Dave Wingo (6:30PM)
Charbar Co.Join us for half price happy hour from 4-7PM & Reid Richmond (6:30PM) Frosty FrogHoppy Hour (5-7PM) Hannah Wicklund (6:30PM-10:30PM) Ruby Lee’s- Candace Woodson & The Domino Theory Band (Every Tuesday)
Ruby Lee’sJune 4 & 18: Reggie Deas & Lavon Stevens Charbar Co.Whitley Deputy (7:00PM)
The BoardroomR2DTour Feat. Joe Vicars (Every Monday)
Frosty Frog- Hoppy Hour (5-7PM) Jon Bruner (Wednesdays 6:30-10:30PM)
Ruby Lee’s- Motown Monday w/ Sterlin & Shuvette Colvin
The BoardroomJune 4 & 18: South Beach Orchestra June 11: Cranford Hollow June 25: Pointe Comfort
Frosty Frog- Luke Mitchell (Mondays 6:30-10:30PM)
Old Oyster Factory- Sara Burns (6-9PM)
Send your event/entertainment listing to email@example.com
Old Oyster FactorySara Burns (6-9PM)
Ela’s Blu Water Grille - Live music (Starting at 8PM) Charbar Co.- Tommy Dargan Sim (7:00PM) Frosty Frog Cafe- Jon Bruner (Fridays 6:3010:30PM)
Up The Creek Pub & Grill: Gator Joe’s Gator Gang (Every Thursday; 7:00PM)
The Tiki Hut- June 13: A Day in the Life of Sailor Jerry – Tattoo’s @ TIKI & Hot Rod Show!
Charbar Co.Mike Bagenstose (7:00PM)
Charbar Co.- Nick Poulin, Derrick & Sammy (8:00PM)
Frosty FrogHoppy Hour (5-7PM) Luke Mitchell (Thursdays 6:30-10:30PM) Lucky RoosterHappy Hour Specials: $1 off all draft beers $2 draft PBR $5 Interesting white and red wine The BoardroomJune 5: CBDB June 12 & 19: B-Town Project June 26: The Morrison Brothers
The Tiki Hut-June 14: Full Moon Party with Ashley Martin Band (6-10PM)
The BoardroomJune 7: The Steppin’ Stones June 14: The Steppin Stones June 21 La Bodega June 28 : The Steppin’ Stones
The Boardroom: June 6: CBDB June 13: Ashley Martin Band June 20: The Steppin’ Stones June 27: The Morrison Brothers
Ruby Lee’s-Earl Williams & Alexander Netwon Frosty Frog- Luke Mitchell (Saturdays; 1-4PM & 6:3010:30PM) Harbourside Cafe- Sara Burns (5:00-7:30PM)
MAY o r
Drew Laughlin Hilto n H ea d Island
Photography By Anne
It Is Time to Prepare
ere we are again, rapidly approaching the heat of the summer and preparing to enjoy the things we love about Hilton Head Island. With all the fun of summer comes the beginning of the 2014 hurricane season. June 1 is the official start of the Atlantic Hurricane Season, which goes through November 30. Even though we have been fortunate in the past, we must continue to prepare for the possibility of a hurricane impacting the island. The Town of Hilton Head Island takes emergency preparedness seriously and recommends everyone take the time to create or update their own emergency plans and kits. Several resources are available to assist you in developing your own family and/or business emergency plan and kit: •
The Town of Hilton Head Island Emergency Preparedness Guide, which can be found at Town Hall, any Fire Rescue Station on the island or online at hiltonheadislandsc.gov/publicsafety/ citizensguideemergencyprep.cfm The Federal Emergency Management Agency (FEMA) at ready.gov The South Carolina Emergency Management Division Family Plan—scemd.org/ planandprepare/preparedness/famdiasterplan Emergency Kit—scemd.org/planandprepare/ preparedness/emergencykit
Just as you develop an emergency plan for your family, the town develops an emergency plan for our family: the citizens of and visitors to Hilton Head Island. Because we are concerned about your safety and our ability to get back on our feet after a disaster, we have developed emergency operations plans to ensure we are as prepared as we can be. We continue to make efforts to improve our preparedness for and ability to respond to and recover from the impacts of severe weather and other disasters. To ensure we are as prepared as we can be, we review and practice our plans annually, just as you should practice your own emergency plans. Once you have your emergency plan and kit in place, make sure you stay informed and keep up with any emergency information. The town’s E-Subscription service is an excellent free service that allows you to get emergency information as well as other information about the activities of the town, including meetings, press releases, projects, and newsletters. To register, visit hiltonheadislandsc.gov/services/e-subscribe. cfm. To receive emergency alerts, select “Emergency Alerts” in the Public Safety & Preparedness Information section. Please join us in taking time now to ensure that you are prepared for hurricane season, and then we’ll all be able to enjoy everything that Hilton Head Island and the Lowcountry has to offer. Hopefully, we’ll have a quiet summer.
MAY o r
Lisa Sulka BLUFFTON
Photography By Anne
A Winning Team
ust like during football season, it is invigorating to be on a winning team. Those wins translate into a productive recruiting season which produces more wins. My son Michael, a college sophomore, has the honor of playing football at Auburn University, where he has the rare experience of tasting the winning spirit of a nationally-recognized team. Despite the heartbreaking loss at the National Championship game in Pasadena this year, many rising high school football stars are setting their sights on a team position. It’s nice to be in a place where many want to be. As mayor of Bluffton, I know that feeling, along with our council, staff members and residents. The word is out that Bluffton is a progressive, productive and innovative town, engaging in projects and programs that are attracting local, statewide and national attention. For example, the Bluffton Police Department has been inundated with résumés from experienced officers. Under the contagious leadership of Chief Joey Reynolds, the police department’s reputation is spreading. Besides saving training budgets, experienced officers can literally hit the ground running. That experience pays well for the officer, the department and the town. As college football teams know, the reputation of their coaches sets the stage for their success. As the third vice president of the prestigious FBI National Academy Associates (FBINAA), Reynolds is representing the organization and the Bluffton Police Department in Kathmandu, Nepal at an Asian-Pacific law enforcement conference this month. It’s impressive for the town’s top officer to have an international stage on which to tell part of the world about Bluffton. The success of special teams also contributes to any football program, and in Bluffton, the Don Ryan Center just scored big. The South Carolina Department of Commerce recently awarded the center a $100,000 grant to nurture the region’s start-up companies. This grant will also pay for educational programs extended to the general public. Additionally, the town’s recent “Heart of the Lowcountry” art contest celebrated Bluffton’s new brand and received 52 entries from residents of all ages and skill levels. More than half of the artists donated their paintings, drawings, sculptures and mixed media pieces to help decorate Town Hall. On behalf of the town, we are continually humbled by our residents’ expressiveness and generosity. That’s a win for all. Lastly, as we enter the summer season, Bluffton residents continue to honor the town’s most cherished trophy, the May River. About 250 people joined us for April’s River Sweep and collected more than two tons of trash from our waterways, streets and parks. Last month’s event produced the largest turn-out in the history of the town’s Earth Day/River Sweep events. It’s a wonderful feeling to be on such a great team, and with the enthusiasm of our beloved residents, we will have many more wins to celebrate. June
A Line in the Sand Photography By Anne
One subject. Two opinions.
he other day, bored out of my skull due to the endless lull between NHL playoffs and pre-season football, I started thinking about my two great loves: monster trucks and barbecued pork. In that vein, I’ve decided to go off-script and spend the remainder of this column talking about how great both are, with extensive sidebars on proper
techniques for reeling in a bass, the implications of changes to Major League Baseball’s home-plate rules, why Hooters has the best cuisine and why I think Schwarzenegger should have won at least one Oscar by now (for Predator, naturally). Okay. I can’t imagine that any women are reading
this column past that paragraph. Gentlemen, our time is short, so read the following carefully. I’m told this is the bridal issue, so odds are good if you’ve picked this up you’re in the process of planning a wedding. (I’m kidding, of course; if you are the groom you have no involvement with the planning whatsoever. Just look busy). Congratulations on your upcoming nuptials and I wish you the best. But marriage is not an undertaking for the ill-prepared, and you do not want to enter into the binding and eternal contract of marriage without knowing the following immutable, unbreakable rule of marriage: If you want a happy marriage, after your wedding day, and for the rest of your life, know this: everything
o, I’m watching an episode of House Hunters on HGTV, and the very lovely (if not odd) couple is looking for a house in Nashville that can accommodate— wait for it—his two pet turtles. Turtles being so large and unruly, this sounds like a real challenge. Luckily their made-for-TV realtor was nicer than I and helped them find just what they needed. As the couple settled into their new house, and splish-splashed in their spa tub (no joke) with the turtles, the husband shared, “I’m not working right now, but I do have hobbies.” When their relationship ends, I think we can safely blame this one on that guy. Barry tells me that National Blame Someone Else Day is June 13. Alas! As you can imagine, I am as
anxious as ever to celebrate this holiday which could likely edge out National Margarita Day as my favorite. But then buzz-killBarry ruined it for me when he suggested that we take it on the chin and talk about the things that are our fault. Whoa. Slow down buddy. I’m going to have to rack my brain to come up with something on topic. June being the wedding issue, I volleyed back with a gentle, “How about we write about things we can blame on our spouses?” Being the gentleman and teddy bear that he is, Barry didn’t feel comfortable complaining about his wife in print. Hold on to this guy Meghan, you’ve got a winner! So here we are. Since I’ve never actually been wrong,
is always your fault. I don’t care what it is; it’s your fault. If she sets fire to the kitchen, it is your fault. If she backs the car through the mailbox, it is your fault. If she leaves her dirty socks on the kitchen table, it is your fault. As the husband, it is always your job to determine your culpability in whatever happens and admit to it. And that’s okay. (If you have to ask why it’s always your fault, you’re already getting off to a bad start. Rational thought has no place in a happy marriage). The most beautiful gardens come from the most torrential rains, and as such your marriage must, from time to time, enter a period that could only be described as openly hostile. There will be shouting, there will be accusations, there may even be a toaster hurled with malicious intent. These things will all be, but what will never be is a fight. Because a fight has a winner. In marriage, there are simply these periods of hostility that must be muscled through. No one is keeping score. There’s no trophy for being right. And the minute you stop thinking about these periods in terms of wins and losses, and stop thinking of them as “fights,” your marriage becomes so much stronger. And in my years of marriage, I’ve found that the treacherous path through these periods of hostility has a shortcut. There is absolutely no defense for a quick, hasty and semi-sincere acceptance of the blame. Which is why, if you want a happy marriage, everything is always your fault. Look at it this way. Let’s go back to that dirty sock scenario (which I’d like to point out for my wife’s sake is entirely fictional and not based on real events). Your immediate reaction to finding a pair of her filthy socks just inches away 112
from where you eat might be to point out to her how disgusting that is. If you’ve been married long enough, you may even consider retaliatory measures involving your own dirty socks and possibly her toothbrush. But what have you accomplished? If she’s the type to leave dirty socks lying around, you’re not going to change that by nagging it away or by mirroring her behavior. If you make an issue out of it, all you’ll have done is made her feel guilty about her slovenliness, which serves you no purpose unless you’re a jerk. Plus, it will almost certainly prompt her to catalogue your many, many flaws. Remember that World War I started with a single bullet. So it is with marriage. Dirty socks beget your filthy bathroom habits beget her annoying laugh beget your idiot friends and thus a pair of dirty socks have started a war. Just admit that it’s your fault for being so hung up on cleanliness. If you do anything else, all you’ve done is created an atmosphere of hostility. Trust me; something you do annoys her equally, if not more so. To some of you, this will feel like surrender. That’s good. If it feels completely backward and counterintuitive, you’re doing it right. Remember what I said about rational thought. It is not to be trusted. Once you’ve mastered the art of jumping on the blame grenade, it becomes like a cheat code for a happy marriage. Is she actually right all the time? Goodness no. But what do you gain by pointing it out? Just a longer period of hostility and a slightly cleaner kitchen table. Not worth it. Just man up and take the blame. No one’s keeping score anyway. And if my wife asks, you did NOT hear this from me. June 2014
that I can remember, I’ll admit I procrastinated on this one. And then, pay dirt! A few days ago, my husband and I sat on a runway in Jamaica awaiting our flight to take off to Atlanta. As the minutes (all 90 of them) ticked by, my brain went into overdrive. Since we were flying in from out of the country our window to land, clear customs, get our luggage, re-check our luggage, go through security, and make it to terminal A, for our flight to Savannah, (from terminal T, where we were scheduled to land, of course) shrunk to near impossible. Once we were finally in the air, we connected to WiFi, realized we were booked on the very last flight to Savannah from Atlanta, and our impending and near impossible task became a reality. So, instead of sitting back and enjoying our last three hours of vacation (with complimentary cocktails, in First Class), and ignoring the situation that was 100 percent out of my control, my brain went into overdrive. Me: “There is no way I am sleeping at the Holiday Inn Atlanta Airport tonight.” My husband: “I’ll rent a car and we’ll drive home.” Me: “There is no way I am spending four hours in the car, after we spent three hours in the airport and another four and a half on this plane.” My husband: “I’ll see if there is a flight into Savannah on another airline.” Me: “I can’t believe I am going to spend my birthday sleeping in an airport hotel.” And so it went—me becoming more and more stressed about the Amazing Race-esque task ahead of us, and my husband becoming more and more stressed about me becoming more and more stressed, because ultimately he June
knew that if we missed that flight, it would be his fault. We ran. We made the flight. We didn’t fight. The relief on my husband’s face was evident. I mean, this potential debacle could have been my fault, for deciding it would be fine to travel back from vacation on my birthday, and for insisting we book the latest flight home so we could have the longest amount of time to enjoy our last day. When I come home and the water from the dog bowls is all over the kitchen floor, it is easier to blame my husband than the dogs. (Of course, it could be that I convinced him to adopt a second dog.) Why is there coffee splatter all over the white backsplash? (I made the last cup.) Who didn’t wipe their feet and tracked dirt all over the tile? (Sometimes I forget to take off my dirty sneaks after a run.) Why didn’t the sprinklers go off? (I’m not trained in landscape maintenance.) Why didn’t you give the dog his medicine? (My hands are apparently broken.) What is all over the counter? (Um, my lunch?) Why is there expired milk in the fridge? (Because I—the only one who drinks milk—didn’t throw it away.) With only two people in the house, whoever identifies the issue first gets to blame the other. Unfortunately, my observation skills are a tad more astute than my husbands, so I usually attack first. But, there are two sides to every story. And, thankfully, opposites attract. www.celebratehiltonhead.com 113
ALL MONTH LONG THE DAWN OF FREEDOM: MITCHELVILLE EXHIBIT The Westin Hilton Head 9AM-7PM Everyday!
CRABBY ENCOUNTERS 9-10:30AM; Mon, Wed, & Fri. Sea Pines Resort 843.842.1979
JUNE 9-AUG 15
JUMPING JACKS KIDS SHOW 6PM & 7PM Salty Dog Cafe saltydog.com
CAMP PROVIDENCE Providence Presbyterian Church Monday-Friday; 8:00-5:00PM $135/week causegodjoy.com
MONDAYS TENNIS EXHIBITION & HAPPY HOUR 5:30PM Sea Pines Racquet Club Complimentary
SHAKESPEARE SUMMER FILM FESTIVAL First Presbyterian Church; 7:00PM Film: Richard III Free www.fpchhi.org
VACATION BIBLE SCHOOL Providence Presbyterian 9:30AM-12:30PM “Wilderness Escape: Where God Guides & Provides”
30 SHAKESPEARE SUMMER FILM FESTIVAL First Presbyterian Church; 7PM Film: Much Ado About Nothing Free www.fpchhi.org
THURSDAY EVERY THURSDAY FARMERS MARKET IN OLD TOWN BLUFFTON Every Thursday 2:00-7:00PM Calhoun Street farmersmarketbluffton .org
SHELTER COVE FARMERS MARKET through Oct. 28 Shelter Cove Community Park 4:00PM-7:00PM
JUNE 17-AUG 12
JUNE 17-JULY 27
SUMMER JAMS Island Rec Center Every Tuesday 7:00-10:00PM islandreccenter. org
PUMP BOYS & DINETTES Arts Center of Coastal Carolina Regular tickets are $44/adults and $31 /children. artshhi.com
FACE PAINTING FUN! 5:30-8:30PM Daily! Courtyard by Jake’s Cargo saltydog.com
KARATE SEMINAR AND DEMOSTRATION Island Rec Center 9AM-1PM $50 islandreccenter. org
BLUFFTON SUNSET PARTY Blues & Brews on the Bluff Bluffton Oyster Factory Park 5:00-9:00PM Sundown celebration with Live Music on the May River! $5.00 blufftonsunsetparty.com
10 14 THE MUSIC LADY’S KIDS SHOW 6:30 & 7:30PM Wreck of the Salty Dog Every Saturday! saltydog.com
SHELL HALL GRAND OPENING 10-5PM Coloring contest for students and sidewalk art competition for all ages.
Shelter Cove Harbour Shannon Tanner (Mon-Fri. 6:30 & 8PM) Oyster Reefers (Thursdays, 7-9PM) Cappy the Clown (M-F, 6-9PM) Fireworks (June 17 & 24, At Dusk)
7 5 JIM FERGUSON MEMORIAL GOLF TOURNAMENT 11:00AM Old South Join us for food, drinks & a silent auction!
HARBOURFEST JUNE 17-AUGUST 12
POOLSIDE MOVIE 8-10PM Harbour Town Pool Reservations Required $15/Adult, $12/child 843.842.1979
MAIN STREET YOUTH THEATRE DANCE CLASSES June 9-13th-Rising 3rd-6th grades 10-11:30 Theatre Dance; $175/week 11:30-12:30 Broadway Tap $125/week www.msyt.org
June 23-27-Rising June 16-20th-Rising 7th-12th grades 7th-12th grades 10-11:30 Intermediate 10-11:30 Beginner Theatre Dance Theatre Dance $175/week $175/week 11:30-1:30 11:30-12:30 Beginner Intermediate Broadway Tap Broadway Tap $125/week $125/week
HAPPY B-DAY KANDACE TIE-DYEING FUN! Monday- Friday 11:00AM-4:00PM Behind the Wreck of the Salty Dog Make your own Tie-Dye Salty Dog T-shirt! saltydog.com
HILTON HEAD FIREFIGHTERS ASSOCIATION “SPRING SWING FOR CHARITY” GOLF TOURNAMENT
Country Club of Hilton Head The format is Captain’s Choice w/ contests,food and beverages. hhfirefighters.org or call Chad at (843) 301-2423