So here are some of the remembered pronouncements at that time on the state of health, or otherwise, of elderly relatives. 1 ‘Under the weather.’ That condition was the least out of sorts anyone could be and survive. Useful for getting out of going to chapel on Sunday with the visiting minister coming from North Wales, and speaking his own, familiar to him dialect, and being considered as a likely man to do well in the championships for long windedness yet to be introduced as a category in the National Eisteddfod. 2 ‘Not up to the mark.’ As far as I know no one has yet found the mark that we are supposed to come up to. It has been suggested that the mark is the one the undertaker puts on the timber for the last resting place, or is it a mark made long ago by someone very famous but now forgotten, in an innocent game of quoits? Or a naughty boy writing the word TWP (it means stupid or a bit slow if you prefer in our local dialect) with an indelible pencil on someone’s forehead when they were asleep. The mere ownership of an indelible pencil was on a par with owning an item from the gold jewellery cache discovered in the ruins of Troy. 3 ‘Been overdoing it.’
Ask yourself is that what his wife would say? She is still waiting to have the back bedroom papered. It has been three years already and, and, her husband is actually a Painter and Decorator with City and Guilds qualifications! But, again, there is a cup tie on the television this afternoon. 4 ‘On the sofa with a rug over her.’ She felt a bit shivery, should have worn a warm coat out last night, went too long without hot food, stood in a draught outside the clubhouse where the “latest boyfriend” was at band practice and they overran! Her mother reported to Elsie next door, “I ask you is it worth it? She is, as they say in these parts a tidy girl . He is not being fair, putting the band ‘first’ . And on such a cold night”. “He clearly had no idea what she had in mind for later on. No chance now. She will be back with Brinley by the weekend, he is a lovely chap, a bit slow on the uptake, but they all are these days aren’t they? But, at least he would not know a flute from a tuba.” 5 ‘Bad in bed’ Curtains are drawn. Still sleeping. Breathing is okay. Seems rested. Still upset about the wedding. Her sister’s wedding it was. She had hoped to be chief bridesmaid wearing pale rose, but, her cousin Sonia who was always really close to the bride to be, had been chosen instead. As chief bridesmaid and as a
CARDIFF TIMES 25
