Byron Bazaar - Corona Chronicles Vol #1, Thursday 2nd April 2020

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Corona Chronicles • Volume #1 • 2nd April 2020

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PHOTO BY: CONNER BOWE

Guided tours from your lounge. PG 2 Isolation or Distancing? TaggeTdOWN Social #BazaarSID. 5 #b yr on ba za

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EAR CANDY

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DEAR KEENWA

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WELL READ

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COMMUNITY NOTICES

Truth or Consequences Yumi Zouma.

TAROTSCOPES

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On a mission to bring light into power.

TRADES AND SERVICES Get #hi$ done.

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My twin flame or Covid fever.

Too Soon Old, Too Late Smart - Gordon Livingston. PG

Helping you spread your word, not 'rona'.

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IN THE NEW WORLD, WE HAVE

had to make a slight tweek to Around Town. Around Home This Week will now give you things to do without leaving the comfort of your own couch. First up, a spot of culture. I haven’t seen this before – been too busy clubbing and pubbing (Ahh, those were the days!), but it’s been around

visits, as sometimes it all looks pretty empty, but you get a chance to look into the daily lives of lions, tigers, bears, monkeys, even penguins and giraffes. Zoos Victoria has even given viewers the chance to check out the newborn snow leopard cubs. Podcasts are everywhere – so many you need a big search engine just to locate them. But they are worth locating and tuning in. All the Australian and international commercial networks create podcasts as do ABC, SBS, BBC and other public broadcasters. Coronacast hosted by the ABC’s Dr Norman Swan probably ranks #1 at the moment, but for something lighter try The Eleventh, about the dismissal of the Whitlam government in 1975; The Joe Rogan Experience hosted by American comedian Joe Rogan; History Extra featuring BBC broadcaster Melvyn Bragg; Force Material for all the Star Wars tragics, hosted by Rohan Williams and Baz McAlister; or a laugh with Judith Lucy’s Overwhelmed and Dying. If exercising at home to a bit of dance music is more your thing, Boogie at Home is a free live online dance class, hosted by Born to Boogie Dance Connection. D-Nice’s Homeschool Playlist on Spotify might set the moves in motion; or check out the well named Social Distancing Festival, drawing various live streaming performances together in one place.

PHOTO BY: ALEX KNIGHT

since 2016. Some of the world’s biggest museums and art galleries open up their collections via Google Arts and Culture. There are over 2,000 galleries, and goodness knows how many collections of some of the most famous artworks ever on the planet. Visiting the Louvre might not be possible from here (they have their own site), but try out the top hits this month - The British Museum in London allows virtual tours of the Great Court, where you can discover the ancient Rosetta Stone and Egyptian mummies. Walk the famous spiral staircase of the Guggenheim Museum of New York, and discover works of art from the Impressionist, PostImpressionist, Modern and Contemporary eras. The Musée d’Orsay in Paris for classic artworks from Monet, Cézanne and Gauguin; and in Rijksmuseum, Amsterdam you walk the hallways to see the masterworks from Rembrandt and Vermeer. It’s not just artworks here. You can “stroll” outside through some of world’s best national parks, gardens and cultural heritage sites; take in some opera, listen in to some outdoor concerts. In fact, I spent a day just looking at what you can look at, so this is definitely a site to permanently bookmark.

STOLEN TRAILER & HUSTLER MOWER

Stolen from The Manse Road, Myocum. Thursday 12th March, 1pm. Major Golf Buggy Tilt Tray Trailer and Hustler Fastrak 54" rideon Mower. Reward offered. Call Andrew on 0412 005 007

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Australia’s Zoos have begun live-streaming their enclosures for public viewing. You might need to time your voyeuristic

TIDE WIND WAVES

THURSDAY

FRIDAY

1-2ft ESE

1-2ft ESE

3 ENE 10:42AM

6 NNE 4:21 PM

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1-2ft ESE 9 NNW 5:05 AM

SURF Forecast SATURDAY

SUNDAY

1-2ft ESE

1-3ft ESE

2+ft ESE

2+ft ESE

1-2ft ESE

14 N 11:52 AM

19 NNW 5:43 AM

19 N 12:28 PM

7 NNE 6:37 AM

9 NE 1:13 PM

REPORT BASED ON BYRON MAIN BEACH | For live surf cams log onto coastalwatch.com


“THIS IS ALL UNPRECEDENTED.” HOW MANY TIMES HAVE WE HEARD that this year? Disastrous; annus horribilis; unpredictable; impossible to prepare for – but was it? On 9th January, in this magazine, Gisela made the following observations for 2020 in her Annual Tarotscope. “There is a sombre mood and we might be pushed to sacrifice some of our comfort-zone or fun for structured hard work. Things we have taken for granted might be in short supply. ……. the disciplinary measures of Saturn separates the bare essentials from the non-essential. ……… If you have to travel during this period, allow more time for delays and complications. …….. reform and restructuring of our society has to happen, but not without great struggle. …….. You may come to reassess the value of your social interactions. Deep and meaningful conversations and less gossip or small talk improve the quality of connection with others. Time alone might become precious and highly desirable as a relaxing refuge.” Tough year. But, by the end of 2020, Gisela leaves us with a sense of optimism. …. “Tensions have been running high for a while now and this conjunction brings integration and resolution. A vision is emerging of how to build new structures, personally and globally, which serve the whole of the planet, not just some individuals.” So, maybe some pleasure after all this pain? Lets hope so. Whatever the outcome, I do think next year will see us move into a new age. We will be chronicling the Coronavirus as THE defining event of our lives. How we survive it and how we live after it. The Gregorian calendar separates history into times Before Christ (BC) and After Death (AD). In our new secular age, we will have a revised historical tipping point. 2019 AD will be ground zero for COVID-19, and 2020 will become known as 1 AC (After Corona). My daughter will hit the magical 50 in 15 AC; my grandson will turn 21 in 16 AC; and my son will hit his 50th in 17 AC. My lovely wife will stay a desirable 40, as she has done for some years now. To follow Gisela and her Tarotscopes; to smile at Keenwa’s enlightened advice; to see how the Home replaces the Town; and to find out what we are reading and listening to; subscribe to the Corona Chronicles in the Byron Bazaar. Make sure you register at www.byronbazaar.com for your free subscription, and your digital copy will be delivered to your e-mailbox every Thursday morning. When we return to printing and distributing, you will once again have two options. Stay tuned, keep toned, and though it might be getting hard, definitely stay chilled! Tony Byron Bazaar

This week's recommendation

ALBUM TITLE: Truth or Consequences ARTIST: Yumi Zouma RELEASED: March 2020 GENRE: Alternative Pop BIO: Yumi Zouma started with a modern approach

to creating their songs, with its band members living abroad and corresponding via email. If they'd started during the Corona outbreak, we'd call it all very responsible! They drew enough attention online, which is how they were signed by the American label Cascine before they'd ever even held a band-practice together or played live. The zippy name Yumi Zouma was created as the collaboration of two friends' names who encouraged the band to start in the very beginning.

WHAT TO EXPECT: Soft layering of voices over a mesh of 80's styled, dancy vibes. Interestingly, there are two voices that swim together throughout the album. One sings of 'impressionistic poetry' and 'hard truths' while the other 'raw and lucid romanticism'. They're two complimenting colours within the chosen palette.

WHAT WE LIKE: Southwark gives a distinct feeling that you could be in an 80's adventure animation, either about to embark on your magical quest or at the end credits. Regardless of specifics, recommended dance moves would include something along the lines of a pumped walking on the spot. Right after comes the bassy synthesisers of Sage. Yum. It's a dreamy one. The other day I picked a tarot card called octomotion. I'm not exactly sure, but I think this card is a description for a dance move. That's what I'm going with anyway, prove me wrong. Octomotion is the appropriate dance move for this song. STANDOUT TRACKS: Right Track/Wrong Man, Truer than Ever. PERFECT FOR: Re-building your jam after a long day of work, driving through a sparkling city at night.

LISTEN IN IF YOU LIKE: Bombay Bicycle Club, Haim. Recommended by Delphi O'Heart.

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Tarotscopes WEEKLY TAROT FORECAST

THIS WEEKEND IS BOUND TO BE BIG! ON

Saturday Venus moves into the intellectual and communicative realm of Gemini. Due to Venus’ eight weeks retrograde stint in the sign of the Twins she takes until early August until she moves on into Cancer. Therefore there is heaps of time to socialise, connect and adapt new ideas. Due to a Mercury/Neptune conjunction also on Saturday, current objectives might be noble and creative (the good twin), or conjured up to provide a smoke-screen in order to hide facts (the bad twin). Mars und Saturn are united (was exact 1st of April) in innovative Aquarius, and Venus is in agreeable trine to the pair. They are cooperative and inspired to share responsibility because they have shared values. On Sunday the first exact fusion of Jupiter and Pluto in Capricorn occurs. This powerful transit is with us for the whole year. Jupiter in Capricorn is on a mission to bring light into power structures and hierarchies of society, business and the legal systems. He expresses the ‘Zeitgeist’, which is the prevailing mindset of our time. Big stuff can happen; revelations and obsessions may amp up the pressure for many people, in particular if you have planets between 23 and 25 degrees in Capricorn, Aries, Cancer or Libra. The last time Jupiter joined Pluto was in late 2007 in fiery Sagittarius. Leading up to the Full Moon in Libra (Wednesday) intensity and struggle may be felt by many. This Super Moon is under the influence of an upsetting Mars/Uranus square. The quest is to find innovative and revolutionary solutions. Thinking outside the box is a must! Mercury in Pisces is onto it while he is sextile to Jupiter and Pluto’s union. Use your intuition as GPS to navigate during the Full Moon time. Daylight Saving ends Sunday morning so turn your clock one hour backward. For the bigger picture read your Sun, Moon and Rising signs. A Tarot card is drawn for each astrological sign.

Astrology and Tarot Forecast consultations by Gisela FOR AN APPOINTMENT: giselasunshine@gmail.com.au or text 0431 894 408

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BY GISELA

g ARIES

k LEO

h TAURUS

l VIRGO

The Justice Tarot card is also called ‘Adjustment’. This week your challenge is to fine-tune your actions and reactions to every moment, instead of falling into impulsive or compulsive habitual responses. An effort in this way brings more harmony and balance, especially around the Full Moon time.

With the 3 of Disks drawn you are bound to find a sweet spot in your work situation this week. It is very inspiring and invigorating when the boundary between fun and work starts to blur. Your enthusiasm and how you fully apply yourself bring great results, while encouraging others to do the same.

Taurus is known for their loyalty and aversion to change, but with the 8 of Cups drawn, it looks like you have been over-investing energy into a mission that now needs to be abandoned. Instinctively you know that you are drained, but it may still be hard to let it go…

The 2 of Wands symbolises a power struggle which may erupt with another person, but there is potential that it may also implode in yourself. Either way it takes a lot of your energy and it can shake you to the bone. Be mindful about how you react when you are out of inner balance…

i GEMINI

a LIBRA

The Knight of Disks symbolises a typically overworked and underpaid person. With Venus in your sign for months you have plenty of time to think about what you value and in which area of your life you undervalue your own work. Maybe settling for small gains is an old habit?

The 5 of Wands is drawn for the second consecutive week. If you experience a prolonged period of worry, stress or hardship it is extremely important to be kind and caring towards yourself, in exactly the same way as you would be there for your best friend, in particular around the Full Moon time.

j CANCER

b SCORPIO

The Lovers Tarot card is the quintessential quest for a loving, sustainable and longterm, viable relationship. This bond is a unique creation between two people who, at times, have different wants, needs and preferences. This week you may find a way to bridge oppositions or polarities and allow more personal space.

The Princess of Swords is the archetype of a free spirit. With her by your side you don’t mind standing up, speaking up or even engaging in a battle of wills. Nevertheless it is important to choose carefully, practically and strategically where to invest your energy so totally.

c SAGITTARIUS

The 5 of Swords represents a mentally and emotionally challenging time. You might feel a lot of inner pressure because your strong sense of personal freedom or integrity is disputed by someone dear to you. Take time to sort things out carefully because you might have an overreaction due to old fears and memories.

d CAPRICORN

The Queen of Disks symbolises the mature, feminine earth mother. With her by your side you are only interested in change if long-term advancement is secured. The Jupiter/Pluto conjunction in your sign helps you to sort out what is valuable, necessary, over the top or has to be abandoned.

e AQUARIUS

With the 3 of Cups drawn this is a week for sharing, caring and networking. Enjoyable relationships nourish your soul and might even help you to connect with the right business people to advance one of your pet projects. The support you give comes back to you in many different ways.

f PISCES

The Queen of Cups encourages you to trust your inner knowing of what is true for you. When in doubt find a beautiful, natural place and allow deep communion with nature. The sense of oneness you experience helps you to clear the mind and find inner alignment.


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YIN YOGA TEACHER TRAINING Join international yoga teacher Mel Mclaughlin for her signature 50 hour Yin Yoga Teacher Training at BodyMindLife Byron Bay. Bookings at bodymindlife.com/whats-on BODYMINDLIFE BYRON BAY | 6 - 10 MAY 2020

Tricky Trivia Answers - Questions on page 11 1. A, GUINEA PIG. 2. B, 2001. 3. TRUE. 4. B, WHALE SHARK.

5. FALSE, WALLY WORLD. 6. B, COBRA KAI. 7. C, ROCKET MAN.

8. C, ELEVEN. 9. B, CUBA. 10. B, 27.

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D IN IN G G U ID E

OUR WEEKLY DINING GUIDE WILL BE CHANGING OVER THE NEXT FEW WEEKS TO MAKE SURE YOU STAY IN THE KNOW. Many restaurants have been forced to close down their dining areas, or amend their services, due to the coronavirus. Some have been working on alternatives. We want to support our local businesses in the best way we can, so for any that are continuing to operate, we will give them a space to tell you about that here. Home Deliveries, Take-aways, In-home dining, even home cooking – this is the place we will pull it all together for you.

CHANGED YOUR BUSINESS MODEL? LET EVERYONE KNOW HOW THEY CAN CONTINUE TO GET YOUR YUMMY FOOD, DELIVERED OR TAKEAWAY

a w n e r e a e K D om AncienTHtE Wisd er Grain Moth FR OM

DEAR KEENWA,

I am in love with my neighbour. Two weeks ago I knocked on his door to borrow some bog roll, and the rest is history. Thing is, he's not really the type I normally go for. I can't decipher whether fate has brought us together, or my primordial brain recognises a protector when she sees one (he has a stack of backup hand sanitiser). How do I know if he's genuinely my twin flame or if I am just suffering from a nasty case of Covid Fever? Lockdown laws means I can't call a friend to come suss it. - Viral Glasses

DEAR VIRAL GLASSES,

I made out with the lead guitarist in a goth band at high school after his Kiss solo which he performed in costume. The next day, when he appeared in normal day clothes, all desire was gone. Also, just so you know, homeschooling is not as cracked up as it looks to be on those earth mama social media accounts.

DEAR KEENWA,

Quarantine is helping me fulfil my lifelong dreams, like I've always wanted to reach out to you Keenwa, and finally with all this spare time, here I am. We are all statistics atm right? I am wondering if your incredible wisdom can predict which category i'll fall into? Specifically, will me and the Mrs be part of the new spike in divorcees, or the ones spruiking the birth rates you reckon? I'll be honest, it changes from one moment to the next. And there are. A. Lot. Of. Moments. In. The. Day. - My Dog No Longer Lovingly Greets Me

DEAR MY DOG NO LONGER LOVINGLY GREETS ME,

I hear ya bro. Our place is like the setting of a really bad rom com crossed with a cult zombie flick, but set in Woolies carpark with Coldplay on repeat, Confusion never stops, Closing walls and ticking clocks.

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d a e R l l e W

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O BOOKS FOR Y

This week's review

TITLE: Too Soon Old, Too Late Smart AUTHOR: Gordon Livingston, M.D. NUMBER OF PAGES: 168 READING TIME: 3 hours 12 minutes PRICE: $11.99 WHAT IT'S ABOUT: Dr. Gordon Livingston (I presume!)

Byron Bazaar supports local businesses, creatives and communities. We are providing an opportunity for new and emerging businesses and talented individuals to advertise their product or service for FREE Send in your advertisement titled "Watch This Space" to hello@byronbazaar.com The dimensions of the ad should be 92.5mmW x 128.5mmH (the size of this box) saved out as a B&W high resolution .jpg or .pdf file.

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was a military surgeon in the Vietnam War, who returned from that experience to begin work as a psychiatrist. Listening to people talk about their troubled lives, he built up a bank of ideas on what seems to work, and what doesn’t – what makes people happy and unhappy. He has distilled his life’s work into “Thirty True Things You Need To Know Now”, which form the chapters of this book. His key message is that we are what we do. Because most of us are more likely to talk about the changes required than to implement steps towards making those changes, we get caught doing the same things and expecting different results. Anxieties, phobias, depression, feelings of hopelessness and suicidal thoughts are the result.

WHO IT'S FOR: I guarantee there will be at least one chapter in here that discusses a recognisable trait that could do with a tweak. It provides some tools to help us take control - to understand that our difficulties are caused by bad choices, and that we can learn to make better choices and to choose a different path. WHY YOU SHOULD READ IT: The chapters are short and succinct essays, each covering one small idea, both anecdotally and theoretically. Too Soon Old, Too Late Smart offers solace, guidance and hope to everyone ready to become the person they'd most like to be.

NOTABLE QUOTES: “The good news is that we have

effective treatments for the symptoms of depression; the bad news is that medication will not make you happy. Happiness is not simply the absence of despair. It is an affirmative state in which our lives have both meaning and pleasure.”


3. STONE & WOOD BREWERY

6. SOLE BROS

4. B-LINE AUTO

10. RUGGED LUXURY

5. C&C KITCHENS & BATHROOMS

11. BYRON FARMERS MARKET

Drop into local independent brewery Stone & Wood for a beer, lunch or a tour, and learn about their approach to brewing and conscious business. stoneandwood.com.au

Your local auto parts store. Lots of parts and friendly service. Mon-Fri 7:30am-5pm. b-lineauto.com.au 02 6686 0588.

Custom quality at affordable prices. Showroom open Mon-Thu 9 to 5 (4pm Fridays). 02 6608 0522 cckitchens.com.au

Largest range of Birkenstock’s in Byron Bay! Quality footwear and accessories for ladies and gents. @solebrosbyronbay

Handcrafted Australian made leather luggage & accessories. Leather and Craft Supplies. 0401 203 603 ruggedluxury.com

Byron Farmers Market has the freshest range of locally grown produce direct from our farmers every Thursday 7-11am at the Cavanbah Centre, along with great coffee, live music and free parking.

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Community

Notice BOARD

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a i v i r y T k c i Tr PG Answers 6

1. The traditional Peruvian dish, Cuy, is made with what animal? A. Guinea Pig B. Rabbit C. Goat 2. The Amazing Race is an American reality competition show which originally aired in what year? A. 1998 B. 2001 C. 2005 3. To celebrate its 30th birthday in 2010, Google placed a playable version of the classic arcade game, Pacman, on its homepage. True or false? 4. Believed to grow as large as 60 feet (18 meters), what is the largest species of shark currently living in the ocean? A. Great White Shark B. Whale Shark C. Basking Shark

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HOSPITALITY CERT III TRAINEE FOR BED AND BREAKFAST

Small accommodation business looking for a new trainee to join our work family. The position is full time for approx. 1 year working towards a Certificate III in Hospitality. Duties vary including breakfast set-up, cleaning rooms, customer service, admin and you will learn skills relevant for managing accommodation. Would suit a school leaver wanting to start work in the accommodation industry. Please email your applications to BYRONPALMSGUESTHOUSE@GMAIL.COM

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5. In the 1983 movie National Lampoon’s Vacation, the fictional amusement park were the Griswold family are trying to go to is called SuperFunLand? True or false? 6. In The Karate Kid, what was the name of the dojo where the boys that bullied Daniel LaRusso trained? A. Black Mamba B. Cobra Kai C. Death Adders 7. Which Elton John song did President Donald Trump use to nickname North Korean leader Kim Jong-Un? A. Tiny Dancer B. Skyline Pigeon C. Rocket Man 8. In the movie Spinal Tap, the band’s amplifier goes from zero to what? A. Hero B. Full-On C. Eleven 9. The Mojito is a traditional rum cocktail from which country? A. Spain B. Cuba C. Hawaii 10. Jimi Hendrix, Janis Joplin, Jim Morrison, and Amy Winehouse all died at what age? A. 24 B. 27 C. 32

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Farmers Markets We are blessed to live in some of the greenest most lush landscapes in Australia and with that comes fantastic growing conditions. With a number of fresh food markets across the shire, local, organic and all round delicious food is only a short distance away. Here are some of the amazing weekly locations where you can fill the pantries and your belly.

TUESDAYS New Brighton Farmers Market 8am - 11am

WEDNESDAYS Murwillumbah Farmers Market 7am - 11am Newrybar Eats and Produce Market 4pm - 7pm

THURSDAYS Byron Bay Farmers Market 7am - 11am Note: location now Cavanbah Centre

FRIDAYS Mullumbimby Farmers Market 7am - 11am

SATURDAYS Bangalow Farmers Market 7am - 11am Lismore Farmers Market 8am - 11:30am

SUNDAYS Ballina Missingham Farmers 6-11am

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