Wasting the Day Away

Wasting the Day Away By: Gwen Schrank

It was a Saturday morning, and all that I wanted to do was stay in bed while continuing to feel the warmth of my weighted blanket holding me down. Thoughts and plans of the many lists of things that I needed to accomplish over the weekend ran through my head; however the tiredness in my bones didn’t want to give way to me climbing out of bed to tackle things that could be handled another time. At least that’s what my mind and body were telling me. That morning, I decided to indulge myself a bit and spend time lying peacefully in my bed and avoiding all distractions. I was determined to become weightless and without thought, as if I was a rock in a soft spot. Nothing was going to lure me away from this moment as it held me so tightly. Enjoying the sunlight beaming through the window and the smell of the vanilla lavender candle at my bedside, I felt safe and comfortable surrounded by beauty, warmth, and softness. How long could I make this moment last? Could I spend the day, or maybe just another hour or two, completely and delicately resting in peace? Then my bedroom door slammed opened and my kids came running in shouting, “Wake up! We’re hungry!” They piled atop my nice soft blankets. “I want pancakes,” my daughter insisted. “I want cereal,” said my son. Okay, okay, okay, it was time to get about the business of my day. How could I ever think that I would be able to pamper myself for just a little while? We live in a busy season of life where our days and nights are filled with one activity after another. It feels as if the twenty-four hours in a day have shrunk to a mere seven or eight, not giving us enough time to balance the activities of life and rest. In today’s world, indulgence is frowned upon. Somehow, people have stopped indulging in the things that bring them good health and healing, but instead have started focusing more on things that add stress, anxiety, and shame. Some people indulge in food, which leads to our bodies being overweight and unhealthy. Some people indulge in worrying over other people’s problems because they don’t want to face their own. They want to gossip and draw attention away from themselves in a way that diverts them from being emotionally healthy. Then there are those who indulge in the feeling of shame, and that takes them down a path of striving to make things better and working hard at things that don’t even suit them. It’s actually about who they think others want them to be. There are good things to indulge in, and bad things to waste your time on, but let’s take a look at why balance is necessary. Everyone needs balance in their lives. Balance is one of the most important goals a person should be working toward in order to apply it in their life. It provides both a space for achievement and a place for rest. It also helps you to determine your boundaries—when it’s time to go, and when it’s time to stop. Unfortunately, in our society’s digital age, we are encouraged to always be on and available to others. The boundary lines are being blurred in a way that is causing more and more people to suffer from stress and be diagnosed with some form of mental illness. People are working, taking care of families, running around doing social events, spending countless hours on social media, and information is constantly flooding our brains to the extent that there isn’t any room left to take care of ourselves and get rest. There is no balance. Today expectations appear to be greater than ever. Balance is often lost to us for days, weeks, and sometimes years. Many people don’t have a clue of what a balanced life looks and feels like.

Balance can be found in various ways. It will be different for each of us and depends on a person’s lifestyle, goals, and how they perceive balance as a whole. For me, it can be as simple as wasting the day away and not feeling bad about it. It has taken me a long time to shed the guilt, but with practice, I’ve managed to do it. Wasting the day away, in my life, means sitting on the couch all day watching movies, going from my comfy perch to the fridge while staying in my softest pajamas. Sometimes I take time to just be, while sitting in a really hot tub of bubbles, listening to my favorite Kenny G song, “Songbird,” over and over again. I love it! And I get the sense that I’m being restored. There are a few things that I tell myself on wasted days. First, I remind myself that my day isn’t really wasted. I’m actually doing myself a good service by balancing out the things that I must do with things that I want to do. I have come to accept the fact that I don’t have to spend every waking hour doing. I’m learning that I need to provide my body, mind, and soul with the opportunity to rest and reboot. No, I didn’t finish the report that I needed to turn in on Monday, and I didn’t make it to the gym for yoga class, and I didn’t reorganize my office, but I did let go. I let go of thinking that running on empty is okay. It’s not. We all need time to rest and ditch the illusion that the world will stop turning if we don’t work ourselves to the bone. Some people find constantly moving meaningful, as if they’ve lost something. I would like to encourage them to find peace in knowing that they have everything they need to do good work wrapped up in the gifts of breathing, resting, spending time recognizing the blessings that are before you, and giving thanks for them. When we’re too busy moving, we move right past the important moments of life. I guess this conversation wouldn’t be complete and balanced if we didn’t discuss that fact that indulging too much can kick your life out of balance, as well. Those are the times where indulgence leads to laziness and unproductive life habits. Overindulgence puts the balance of life in a state that eventually leads to being overwhelmed. When a person has leaned too much to one side or the other, the balance is off.

Take some time to explore your life. Stop and pay attention to your days. Work on balancing out some of the areas that seem out of control, demanding, and tiresome. Embrace the idea of creating space throughout the day to become a better centered and more rested you. Here are a few suggestions to help you in your efforts to create a well-balanced life:

Take care of and nurture yourself

You cannot accomplish anything if you’re unhealthy. Get plenty of rest, exercise, and eat properly. Many of us think that we can burn the candle at both ends, but fail to realize that we will burn out fast. Set aside time each day for an activity that you enjoy, such as walking, working out, or listening to music. Read, meditate, or just take a nice hot bath.

Know your priorities

Balance does not entail cramming in every activity possible. Decide what’s important to you, and then set your boundaries. Avoid becoming overwhelmed by juggling too many big projects in your life at once.

Create awareness with an efficient mindset

Be organized and plan ahead. Take time to assess what needs to be done and be sure to allow for quality time for yourself and family. Awareness is important to balancing and learning from previous experiences.

Expect the unexpected

Rather than get stressed and upset, learn to roll with the flow when dealing with something that you can’t control. Stuff happens, and we’ve all experienced the unexpected. Do what you can, when you can, then take time to refresh and rejuvenate yourself after going through unexpected crisis or situations. You’re worth it!

Maintain a positive mental attitude

Begin each day with the intention of making the best and most of it. It may not go as planned, but it can go smoothly if you put it into perspective. Once you’ve done everything that you can within your control, let life unfold.

While we all can’t spend time sleeping our day away, and we can’t anticipate or plan for everything in our lives, we can decide how and where to concentrate our energy. This may require some critical thinking and problem solving, but in the end it will lead to much less stress and a better balanced life.