The Scrivener - Summer 2019 - Volume 28 Number 2

Page 73

PERSONAL DEVELOPMENT Carla Rieger

3 Surefire Ways to Boost Your Confidence (without Being Arrogant)

C

onfidence often leads to success in life.

A lack of confidence often leads to missing out on a good job, a sale, or a relationship. But what if you lack confidence and don’t even know it? People often procrastinate and think they are just being lazy. But really, they lack confidence. And that lack of confidence often masks a fear of failure. When successful people are asked their secret of success, they often say, “I chose to believe in myself even when no one else did.” How did they accomplish that mindset? They chose it. They actually manufactured it and probably didn’t even realize it. The good news is you can “manufacture” true confidence (without arrogance), even if you don’t have it now. Arrogance usually is an overcompensation for low self-confidence. People with true self-confidence do not come across as arrogant. They just seem certain, grounded, and capable. Here’s a common scenario. You are feeling a lack of confidence about an upcoming highstakes situation. Maybe it’s public Volume 28  Number 2  Summer 2019

speaking, an interview, or a sales pitch. A well-meaning friend says, “Just believe in yourself!” Does that really help? Not usually. It’s not something you can just switch on at will. Confidence is the result of many stories you tell about yourself and to yourself. They are stored in your subconscious mind. Some people have stories that help them feel confident. Most people have a list of bad stories that make them have low self-confidence. The good news is you can change the balance of bad to good.

When successful people are asked their secret of success, they often say, “I chose to believe in myself even when no one else did.” Here are three easy steps to manufacture true confidence.

1. List Your Stories of Success Choose an area of life where you want more self-confidence, for example, during interviews. Make a list of times you had an interview and it went well, even just okay. Now write out the details of what went right. Keep a list of positive short stories about your successes and The Scrivener | www.notaries.bc.ca/scrivener

re-read them, especially just before another interview. That will ensure good memories are in your short term memory bank, not bad memories.

2. Start an “Esteem Bank” Anytime someone genuinely compliments you about anything, write it down in a journal called your “Esteem Bank” and re-read it often. Again, that stacks the good stories in favour of the bad.

3. Compliment Others Genuine compliments are hard to come by these days. They can boost the receiver’s energy and improve your own energy, as well. Something as simple as people’s choice of clothes or the fact that he arrived on time for a meeting can make a difference. In turn, that person may return kindness with kindness, to you and/or others. Most people judge others. Even if you don’t express it out loud, the energy signature of judgment gets picked up by others. Gratitude for others changes the way your brain works and the way others receive you. Gratitude fills your system with stress-reduction hormones. What do you do to build your confidence? s

Carla Rieger is CEO of The Artistry of Change Inc. and Co-Founder of MindStory Academy. TABLE OF CONTENTS

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TECHNOLOGY

6min
pages 76-77

PERSONAL DEVELOPMENT

2min
page 73

TAXES

7min
pages 70-71

BC Notaries Speak Your Language

2min
page 69

WILLS AND ESTATES

9min
pages 66-68

TRAVEL INSURANCE

5min
pages 64-65

MEDIATION

4min
pages 62-63

2019 BC LAND SUMMIT

5min
pages 60-61

SURVEYING IN BRITISH COLUMBIA

5min
pages 58-59

SPOTLIGHT ON GOOD WORKS

4min
pages 54-55

BRITISH COLUMBIA LAW INSTITUTE

4min
pages 56-57

The BC Notary Foundation Joins over 50 Partners in the Access to Justice BC’s Triple Aim Initiative

1min
page 53

Address from the Graduating Class of 2019 . . . We Are on Our Way

2min
page 50

Message to the New Notaries from The President of The Society of Notaries Public

2min
page 49

The Notary Pledge

2min
page 48

Address to Our BC Notary Graduates from The Honourable Chief Justice Hinkson

3min
page 47

Congratulations, BC Notary Class of 2019

1min
page 46

PROFILE OF A BC NOTARY

6min
pages 38-39

Greenstreaming” of Factory-Built Housing

6min
pages 30-32

BC Notaries Spring Conference 2019

4min
pages 40-43

Tiny Homes: The Cube

1min
pages 36-37

Energy Use and Savings in Strata Homes

9min
pages 33-35

Green and Sustainable Building Practices in BC

4min
pages 28-29

Green Building Policies Set to Catalyze Construction Innovation and Create $3.3 Billion in Business Opportunities

4min
pages 24-25

Renaissance Man

25min
pages 11-19

Editor’s

2min
page 23

KEYNOTE

1min
page 10

ENERGY SYSTEMS

3min
page 22

INTERIM CEO, BC NOTARIES ASSOCIATION

4min
page 9

PRESIDENT, BC NOTARIES ASSOCIATION

2min
page 8

PRESIDENT, THE SOCIETY OF NOTARIES PUBLIC OF BC

2min
page 6

EXECUTIVE DIRECTOR, THE SOCIETY OF NOTARIES PUBLIC OF BC

2min
page 7
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