COMMUNICATING
Filip de Sagher
Out of Touch
©iStockphoto.com/estelle75
The Creation of Adam (Michelangelo, c.1510)—painted on the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel in the Vatican—is about the creation of life. To touch is to be human.
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reeting is communicating: We acknowledge each other’s presence when meeting and when saying our farewells, often with the same gestures. Various cultures do that in different ways depending on the situation, the relationship, and the social status. It involves non-verbal communication—gestures such as tipping your hat or bowing as the Japanese do with their arms and hands on their side—and, but not always, the spoken word. It can be a simple waive with one hand and yelling “hello” or you can just nod your head to someone. Among my favourites is the Namaste-greeting used in many parts of Asia . . . slightly bowing your head with hands pressed together prayer-like or crossed over your chest. In New Zealand, the Maori rub noses and/or touch foreheads. There are many variations across communities and continents and quite a few greetings have a religious origin or meaning.
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TABLE OF CONTENTS
Shake Globally, the handshake must be the most common greeting but note that in some countries, religion or social taboos forbid handshakes between men and women.
Once it was very respectful for a gentleman to greet a lady by kissing her hand, especially in high society. In its simplest form, two people grab each other’s right hand and the hands move briefly up and down. But variations are legion and many meanings can be deduced. A strong handshake lingering on for a few minutes, for example, might be considered rude social etiquette by some but it could also indicate an enthusiastic greeting between two friends who have not seen each other for a long time. Confidence might be expressed or just the opposite if firmness is lacking. And what to make of a warm handshake, whereby once right hands are clasped, you now place your left hand over the other person’s hand? At the same time you might be BC Notaries Association
staring intently into your partner’s eyes, with the right word at that moment . . . A romantic undertone is certainly part of the hand kiss. That, by the way, illustrates how greetings change over time. Once it was very respectful for a gentleman to greet a lady by kissing her hand, especially in high society. It is now considered oldfashioned. But if you do kiss a woman’s hand, you probably have the intent to convey “certain” feelings and emotions that a simple handshake cannot. Note that a leftover of the outdated hand kiss is the formal marriage proposal. Hold the girl’s hand gently in your right hand, place your right knee on the floor, and with your left hand, present the ring-inthe-box. From personal experience, I suggest practising that intricate move, especially opening the minuscule box with your clumsy hand. It is not easy and you only get one shot at it.
Kiss One, two, three, four? How many kisses are to be exchanged in what circumstances with whom? Lip-to-cheek or cheek-to-cheek? Volume 29 Number 4 Winter 2020
