Aqua Marianas Episode 3
BEGIN EPISODE 3: FADE IN:
[THEME SONG FADES IN, PLAYS, FADES OUT.] JOANNA Aqua Marianas, Episode 3. [A few seconds of silence. Then a ding and crackling over the comms. ALEX’s voice comes through.] ALEX (waaaaay too chipper for this) Hey everybody! So today is our monthly psych evaluation day, which means that everyone is gonna have to meet with me for a talk about how living down here in the depths is affecting you, your thoughts, etcetera. Remember, some of this is official and it will be going on your transcripts and sent to the surface, but I want you to be as open and candid with me as possible. Details will not be going into any evaluation with your names for patient confidentiality reasons, and I won’t use this information for anything other than research and reporting. [He pauses for a moment.] ALEX (quieter and more enunciated now) During our sessions, please try to remember that I’m not really a therapist, no matter how it seems. I am a psychologist primarily, which means I’m supposed to study your behavior. If necessary, I can and will help keep everyone on an even keel, but I have a vested interest in how your lives go because the consequences of your actions directly affect me. Which all goes to say
that I’m not going to be able to provide for you or talk to you like a therapist might. [BEAT.] ALEX (back to the normal sort of chipper) I’m still probably the best person to talk to on this station, though. See you all outside my office in five minutes! [The comms system crackles and shuts off. LILLIAN (who has been listening while working on… something) turns to JOANNA (who is working next to her) with a rustle of paper.] LILLIAN Well, this sounds like it’ll be a blast. JOANNA At least it’s Alex. Can you imagine if one of us was in charge of these sessions? LILLIAN (horrified) Spare me. I have enough trouble listening to Andrew whine as it is, I can’t imagine inviting him to spill all his problems to me. Oh god, imagine him doing the psych evals. JOANNA (giggles) Imagine the Captain doing them! [They imitate MAHIMA’s voice.] JOANNA (annoyed-sounding, with as much of an American accent as you can muster) “Crew, you’re going to sit down with me and talk about how you feel whether you like it or not!”
[They both laugh for a little bit. Then it peters out, and LILLIAN sighs.] LILLIAN What did she even ask us to do here? I’m trying to read these pages, and it just seems like gibberish. [More paper rustling. JOANNA hums under their breath.] JOANNA Um… we’re supposed to sort these, I think. These ones look like someone at HQ’s notes on the thermal vent we’re built by. Temperature readings, stuff like that. [Brief pause as papers ruffle faster.] At least, I t hink that’s what this is. Whoever wrote this, their handwriting is awful. I can barely read it. [MAHIMA approaches from behind them.] MAHIMA That’s because you’re not supposed to spend all your time reading them, Dr. Fenistil. You’re supposed to organize by date. Which is written in the top left corner of every sheet. JOANNA (slightly frantic) Oh! Captain, I, uh, didn’t see you there. Uh. That does make slightly more sense. MAHIMA Have you two made any progress at all? [JOANNA and LILLIAN shrug and make awkward faces. Simultaneously:] JOANNA
Ehhh… LILLIAN Not really. [MAHIMA sighs and puts her face in her hands. Then she looks up.] MAHIMA Alright, well, that doesn’t matter. Didn’t you hear? Meeting. Five minutes. Or… four minutes, now. I thought I’d check on everyone to make sure none of you were going to be late. [She says the last word pointedly. JOANNA winces.] JOANNA Look, I’m sorry about the first meeting, but you really don’t have to check on me every timeMAHIMA (dismissive) Wasn’t talking to you, Dr. Fenistil. Lillian, why didn’t you meet me in the office yesterday to talk about some of the… modifications you made to the toaster? LILLIAN (confused) I was supposed to meet you in your office? MAHIMA Yes. Yes, you were. And we’ll discuss this later, Lillian, but right now we have… [She checks her watch.] Three minutes to get to Alex’s psychological analysis sessions. Come on. MAHIMA (firm, serious)
Now, please. [Chorus of “Oh, okay”s and “yeah sure why not”s, as well as scrambling to get up and get going.] MAHIMA Good. OPEN NEW SCENE: Waiting room outside Alex’s office/lab [Everyone is milling around, waiting for ALEX, who pops his head in from his office door.] ALEX Alright! Glad to see everyone’s here on time. This shouldn’t take too much time, so each of you just come in one at a time, starting with you, Joanna. JOANNA Me? ALEX Your folder was at the top of the pile. Come on in! [JOANNA looks vaguely uncomfortable with this idea, but they walk in and sit in what looks like a medical chair, next to a thing that is beeping. ALEX walks in after them.] JOANNA What’s this thing next to my chair? ALEX Oh, that’s just to get your vitals during our session. Heart rate monitors, breathing speed, sweat response, temperature- by the way, I’m going to stick this in your ear to get a reading. JOANNA Oh, uh-
ALEX 97.5 degrees Fahrenheit. JOANNA ...In Celsius? ALEX Uhhhh… [He does some mental math.] ...36.4? Point is, your temperature is a bit low. [JOANNA shrugs. They’re not surprised.] JOANNA Well, I can be a little bit cold-blooded. ALEX ...Right. Okay. Well, I’m just going to hook you up to some of these. You can strap that around your stomach for breathing speed[There’s a Velcro ripping noise as they do that.] ALEX I’ll put these on your wrists, and then these you can put around your fingers. [Tiny Velcro noises. The beeping keeps going, now slower and smoother.] JOANNA Is this it? ALEX Oh, not by a long shot. Here’s how this is going to work. I’m going to ask you some quick questions, like[Here it cuts out into ALEX asking a bunch of different questions and different people answering. It is implied that we are skipping between therapy sessions.]
ALEX What is your full name, age, and birthdate? JOANNA Joanna Maris Fenistil, thirty years old, born on January 31st. [Static indicating switching.]
MAHIMA Mahima Kumar, no middle name. I was born on June 24th, currently 34 years old. [Static.] ANDREW Andrew Immanuel Federman, 31, and January 13th. Don’t you have all this already? [Static.] LILLIAN Lillian Evett Vega, I’m 32, and I was born on September 22nd. [Static.] ALEX What was your occupation before you came down here? JOANNA Marine biologist working for Kelly Tarlton’s. An aquarium in New Zealand. I mostly kept the tanks at optimal conditions and worked with the deep-sea creatures. It’s very hard to keep them alive outside of the ocean[Static.] MAHIMA
I served some time in the Army, but I was primarily an oceanographer when I was recruited. [Static.] ANDREW I worked for HQ as a documentarian. I went where the stories went, and the story went here, as much as I wish it hadn’t. Seriously, wasn’t all of this stuff in my file? [Static.] LILLIAN Pretty much the same as down here; I was a mechanical engineer, building things and testing stuff. I proposed the idea for the base in the first place, designed it myself, oversaw how it was built. I’m pretty much the only person who can keep this thing running. [Static.] ALEX Did you enjoy your job? JOANNA (thoughtful and tentative) Yes, but I wanted to be… closer, I guess. To the ocean. [Static.] MAHIMA (very sure of herself) It was a job. But the work was good. It was enjoyable. [Static.] ANDREW (flippant) More than I like being down here.
[Static.] LILLIAN I do the same things, here and there. It’s just darker down here. [Static.] ALEX Are you happy here? JOANNA (long pause) I don’t know. I like some parts. I like being here, but I’m not sure if I like the reality of living here. Does that make any sense? [Static.] MAHIMA Maybe. If I could get any of you to listen to me. At all. Ever. [Static.] ANDREW Uh, no, no, and hell fucking no? I have never disliked anything more than I dislike this. I can go in-depth, if you wantALEX (the first time he has spoken after anyone. He sounds tired) Please don’t. [Static.] LILLIAN Apart from certain people [Meaning ANDREW, obviously], yeah, I do like it down here. [Static. It’s switching faster now after the words.]
ALEX Are you homesick? JOANNA I don’t think so. I miss things about home, but not… the way it was. I like the quiet we get sometimes. [Static.] MAHIMA (thoughtfully) I might be. Or I might not. It depends. [Static.] ANDREW (emphatically) Yes. [Static.] [There is a very long pause before LILLIAN answers. When she does, her voice is quiet.] LILLIAN No. I told you, I’ve worked on this place for so long that it pretty much is my life now. “Home” was a crappy apartment. Actually, scratch that. Home didn’t exist. This is where I belong, I think. Not underwater, but… here. On Benthos Outpost. It’s part of me. [BEAT.] ALEX (thoughtfully) Home base. LILLIAN (small voice) Yeah.
[Brief pause.] Exactly. [Static, but extended. We switch back to JOANNA’s session, where we will stay for a while.] JOANNA Is that everything? Can we be done now? I do have papers to sort for Captain Kumar, you know. ALEX Sorry, no. Well, yes, but no. I do have more questions for you that HQ provided, but frankly those are… very routine and boring. Now I’ve just got one more thing to talk about. [He leans forwards, steepling his fingers. When he speaks, his voice is quiet.] ALEX (hushed) Have you noticed anything weird going on around here? JOANNA ...What? ALEX Weird. Anything weird. JOANNA Define weird. ALEX Something out of the usual. Something that wouldn’t normally happen. JOANNA Define normal. ALEX (Starting to get slightly frustrated)
The usual causation of events. You know. JOANNA (Patient in the face of Alex’s annoyance) Yes, but I don’t think you understand. Alex, did you mean normal up there or down here? Because those are two very, very different kinds of normal. [BEAT. ALEX says nothing.] JOANNA I’ve seen experimental results from samples gathered here that might be construed as weird. I’ve seen them act in ways I haven’t seen before. But Benthos Outpost and everything down here is so alien and so foreign that I can’t possibly say that this isn’t what passes for normal. I’ll just have to do more tests to find out. [Long pause. More static begins to build in the background.] JOANNA (Almost drowned out, somewhat distorted) Does that make sense? [Static overwhelms the recording. Then there’s a blip and we switch back to everyone gathered together outside ALEX’s office. MAHIMA is taking charge.] MAHIMA Alright, everyone. I want you all to go back to what you were doing before. We won’t have to do another one of these for another month, so we’ll be having a little celebration as well. “Celebration”, of course, meaning that we’ll finish our work, have dinner, and then… I have no idea. What do we all think is fun? [Everyone:]
ALEX Reading? Chatting? Either and/or both, I guess. JOANNA Experiments and listening to music! ANDREW Nothing we could possibly do down here. LILLIAN I live for popcorn, dancing, and things with wires and gears. But not all at once. [BEAT.] MAHIMA ...We’re not very social, are we. EVERYONE No. MAHIMA Regardless, we should do something and we are going to do something as a crew for once, so help me god. Everyone, get your tasks done as much as you can. It’s, what, 1400 hours now? ANDREW Just say 2 o’clock, dammit. MAHIMA No. Alright, at 1700 hours we’ll meet back at the porthole room and… watch a movie or something. It’s my turn on dinner duty anyways. I’ll get to work on the popcorn Lillian mentioned and maybe get out one of our boxes of cake mix and bake something for once. LILLIAN Wow, Captain HookMAHIMA (interrupting)
What did you just call me? LILLIAN (ignoring her) -that’s uncharacteristically nice of you. MAHIMA First, it’s Captain Kumar, and if you don’t refer to me as such I’ll find a way to keelhaul you. Secondly, is it so hard to believe I can on occasion be personable and social and want to reward my crew? LILLIAN ...you just threatened to kill me horrifyingly. MAHIMA (deadpan) That’s personable. LILLIAN I truly fear you sometimes. MAHIMA Good. Oh, before we have our movie night, you need to talk with me about certain toaster modifications. Such as the fact that it now plays elevator music as it toasts and the other fact that it burns insults onto the bread. ANDREW Wait, I thought I was hallucinating how my toast called me a jackass! JOANNA Wait, what? LILLIAN Way to ruin a practical joke, Captain Buzzkill. MAHIMA Today I woke up and saw “Insufferable dumbfuck” burned on my toast. While I’m impressed that you
managed to make the insults change to be unique and also how you got all those letters onto a piece of bread, I’m also going to invite you to consider that I run this fucking ship. LILLIAN Yeah, butMAHIMA (exasperated and reaching for any compromise) If it makes you happy, you can keep the elevator music. LILLIAN (triumphant) Yesssss! ANDREW Nooooooo! MAHIMA So, that’s cleared up. Crew, disperse. You have your things to do, and we have mandatory activities this evening. Just… work smoothly and efficiently for once. [Complete silence. MAHIMA sighs in defeat.] MAHIMA Failing that, don’t actively destroy things and try to be moderately productive. [Sounds of agreement from everyone.] MAHIMA Good. Now go. [Sounds of everyone leaving. ALEX’s office door shuts. The episode ends on that note.]
FADE OUT: END OF EPISODE 1.