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LESSONS FROM PESACH CLEANING

SOMETIMES, THEWORK ISHARDER.

SOMETIMES, THE WORK IS HARDER.

Ignoring the yukkier parts (like trash cans) can make the task more challenging. Trash cans are often forgotten. Until they can’t be ignored anymore. And then the work is harder. But just because it's hard, it doesn't mean that you should neglect it. The longer you wait, the worse it will smell. Setting up a system can prevent the trash can from becoming too dirty in the first place. Clean it regularly to avoid a smelly situation.

Cleaning your trash can frequently can prevent the accumulation of unpleasant odors and make the task less daunting.

Similarly, in relationships, it's important to address issues as they arise instead of waiting until they become bigger problems, and setting up effective communication and problem-solving systems can prevent issues from getting out of control.

LESSONS FROM PESACH CLEANING

WHENTHEWINDOWS ARECLEAN,THEWORLD LOOKSBRIGHTER.

WHEN THE WINDOWS ARE CLEAN, THE WORLD LOOKS BRIGHTER.

Windows are the lens through which we see the world. Dirt on the windows filters how we see what is out there.

Window cleaning is about changing what we see by transforming what we are looking through, not what we are looking at.

But the windows don’t stay clean for long. You’ll have to notice that they are getting dirty and clean them again in order to maintain the great view.

Similarly, keep your window – your perspectives – about your own life and marriage clean. Just like cleaning the windows, it requires regular maintenance to keep the view clear.

LESSONS FROM PESACH CLEANING

AFTERYOUGETRIDOF THEUSELESS,BE SELECTIVEABOUT WHATYOUPUTBACKIN.

AFTER YOU GET RID OF THE USELESS, BE SELECTIVE ABOUT WHAT YOU PUT BACK IN.

You’ve put in the effort to organize and get rid of things that don’t serve you well. From hereon, be selective about what you bring into your life. Choose wisely. Don’t let your clean home become a mess again.

Shop in quality places that reflect the vibe you want for your home. Try things out in your home and if they don’t fit the vibe, send them back.

Similarly, in your marriage and relationships, be selective in the words and mindsets you bring into your life. You can try them out; if they work well then keep them, and if they don’t bring happiness to all, get rid of them.

LESSONS FROM PESACH CLEANING

SOMETIMES,YOU'LL NEEDPROFESSIONAL HELP.

SOMETIMES, YOU'LL NEED PROFESSIONAL HELP.

Sometimes, the mess is so deep, so overwhelming, so ingrained. You simply can’t figure out how to address it with the tools and resources you have. In such cases, it is imperative to seek help, even if it incurs some costs or feels uncomfortable. Even if it feels somewhat awkward (though it really shouldn’t). Even if you don’t know exactly what kind of support you need. It is your home after all. The place where you should be able to relax and recharge after a hard day. In peace and tranquility.

Similarly, in your marriage and other relationships, there may come a time when you need outside support. Sometimes, the problems can be too complicated or deeply ingrained to address on your own. It's crucial to recognize when professional help is necessary. Your relationship is worth it.

DON'TGIVEUP. EVENIFITTAKES ALOTOFEFFORT.

LESSONS FROM PESACH CLEANING

DON'T GIVE UP. EVEN IF IT TAKES A LOT OF EFFORT.

You’ve put in the effort to organize and get rid of things that don’t serve you well. From hereon, be selective about what you bring into your life. Choose wisely. Don’t let your clean home become a mess again.

Shop in quality places that reflect the vibe you want for your home. Try things out in your home and if they don’t fit the vibe, send them back.

Similarly, in your marriage and relationships, be selective in the words and mindsets you bring into your life. You can try them out; if they work well then keep them, and if they don’t bring happiness to all, get rid of them.

LESSONS FROM PESACH CLEANING

EVERYONE HASAMESSY DRAWER SOMEWHERE.

EVERYONE HAS A MESSY DRAWER SOMEWHERE.

Don’t compare your home/life to anyone else’s. Everyone has at least a small messy drawer somewhere. But you may not see it and they probably are not going to share about it publicly. Similarly, in your marriage and relationships, comparing yourself to others can be a recipe for frustration and disappointment. Instead, focus on your own goals and progress, and take pride in the efforts you are making to create a clean and organized home and life.

SOMETIMESITGETS MESSIERBEFOREIT GETSCLEANER.

LESSONS FROM PESACH CLEANING

SOMETIMES

IT GETS MESSIER BEFORE IT GETS CLEANER.

Don’t look until it’s done. Sometimes, the mess gets worse before it gets tidier. Don’t let that discourage you.

Sometimes, you have to take things apart as you choose what should stay, what should be moved or what should be changed.

Only when you move things out of the corners, can you address the dirt and dust in the nooks and crannies. You need to move the chairs to wash the floor under the table.

In the end, everything useful is put back, everything is neater and tidier than it was before. It’s a beautiful transformation.

Similarly, in your marriage and other relationships, working on the relationship can be challenging, and it may get uncomfortable as you have difficult conversations and increase your self-awareness. Just like in cleaning up a messy home, it may get messier before it gets better. You may have to take things apart and examine them closely to determine what needs to be changed or improved. But, as you address the issues and work through the challenges, you can create a beautiful transformation that brings you closer together and strengthens your bond. It's worth persevering through the discomfort to create a happier, healthier relationship in the end.

AFAMILYTHAT WORKSTOGETHER, STAYSTOGETHER.

LESSONS FROM PESACH CLEANING

A FAMILY THAT WORKS TOGETHER, STAYS TOGETHER.

An important key to blissful cleanliness boils down to communication: what, when, and how household tasks need to be carried out.

Couples who have a clear and respectful understanding of their roles in household chores spend less time negotiating and arguing over trivial matters. It is essential to define each task in detail to avoid misunderstandings and unfulfilled expectations.

Work together as a team and appreciate each other's efforts in maintaining a clean and organized home. Use this time to bond and strengthen your family relationships.

Similarly, in your marriage and other relationships, it is important to acknowledge and appreciate each other's contributions toward the success of the relationship. Just like in household chores, it is crucial to have a clear understanding of each other's expectations and roles in the relationship. Communication plays a vital role in avoiding misunderstandings and conflicts. By acknowledging and appreciating each other's efforts, you can strengthen your bond and build a happier and more fulfilling relationship. Remember, it takes the effort of both parties to make a relationship work.

THEMESSWON'TGO AWAYUNLESSYOUDO SOMETHINGABOUTIT.

LESSONS FROM PESACH CLEANING

THE MESS WON'T GO AWAY UNLESS YOU DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT.

Ignoring the mess doesn’t make it less of a mess. Neither does denial. Neither does wishing it away or hoping that someone else will take care of it. It doesn’t just get clean by itself. (‘Just point and junk disappears’ is just a marketing ploy from a junk removal company.) It may seem overwhelming. But just about any mess can be tackled and eventually it can be cleaned up.

It all starts with the desire to make that change. and then getting going. Slow steady progress.

Similarly, problems in marriage and relationships won't go away unless you actively address them and take steps toward resolution, as ignoring or denying them will only make them worse over time and lead to further damage. It may seem daunting, but with the desire for change and steady progress, any issue can be tackled and eventually resolved.

STOPANDCELEBRATE SMALLWINS.

LESSONS FROM PESACH CLEANING

STOP AND CELEBRATE SMALL WINS.

Don't forget to celebrate small wins along the way. The small win is an accomplishment that you weren't entirely confident you could achieve, like cleaning out a closet or clearing out some clutter.

Each small victory you achieve adds up to significant progress. Step by step, you're making a difference in your home and your life.

Take the time to acknowledge your progress and celebrate your successes. Reflect on how far you've come and feel proud of yourself for all your hard work. Reward yourself for your efforts, but don't get complacent. Keep pushing forward toward your goals.

Sharing your successes with others can make them even more rewarding. Talk about your accomplishments with friends and family, and maybe you'll even inspire them to tackle their own challenges.

Similarly, in a marriage or relationship, celebrating small wins (such as working through a disagreement or accomplishing a shared goal) can lead to significant positive change and provide encouragement to continue moving forward.

LESSONS FROM PESACH CLEANING

USETHEBESTTOOLS FORTHEJOB.

USE THE BEST TOOLS FOR THE JOB.

There are so many tools and methods for cleaning. Using the right tools can make the job so much easier and more effective. The right sponge, scrubber or spray cleaner. Don’t just ‘make do’ with whatever tools you have at hand. It is worth investing in getting the best tool for the task.

And once you figure out which is the best tool for the task, maintain that tool. Sharpen it as necessary, keep it out of the elements. Check out the tool from time to time; is it at its optimal, or is it wearing down? It might be time to replace it.

Just because you’ve been doing something one way for years doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t try a new tool or technique that might make your work easier or give you better results with less effort. Always listen out for better ways to do things.

Similarly, in a marriage or relationship, using the right communication tools and methods can make problem-solving and conflict resolution easier and more effective, so invest in learning and practicing these skills, and be open to trying new approaches to improve your relationship.

DON'TWAITFORA MESSTOCLEANUP. KEEPITCLEAN.

LESSONS FROM PESACH CLEANING

DON'T WAIT FOR A MESS TO CLEAN UP. KEEP IT CLEAN.

Being in a clean and neat environment just is better. It is harder to relax in a mess. And there is the wasted time and energy expended to navigate around a mess and to look for whatever it is you need.

Constant care and maintenance extend the life and quality of your home. As an example, dust and dirt particles can mar and dull the finish on your floor, so it is best to sweep often.

Consistent maintenance means there won’t be that nagging thought: “I need to get that done” in the back of your mind all the time. It clears your head to be present in the moment.

And most importantly, your children learn habits from you. If you want your kids to have good habits, show them.

Similarly, in marriage and relationships, it is important to consistently maintain and care for the partnership to avoid messes and ensure a healthy and long-lasting relationship. This means taking the time to communicate, showing appreciation, and addressing issues as they arise, rather than waiting for them to escalate into larger problems.

ONCETHEREISAMESS, ITCANGROWQUICKLY. DON'TLETIT.

LESSONS FROM PESACH CLEANING

ONCE THERE IS A MESS, IT CAN GROW QUICKLY. DON'T LET IT.

The way clutter works: If there is already a pile of miscellaneous clutter, it will ‘invite’ us to leave more things on the pile. Why bother putting it away if the room is a mess anyway; one more piece won’t even be noticed. We’re creating a norm of allowing ourselves and others to not bother.

And the mess grows bigger.

Don’t let that happen. Deal with the papers and stuff right away. While it is easily manageable. Don’t let it build up.

Address issues when they are small and easily manageable. Don’t let them build up.

Similarly, in marriage and relationships, it is important to address issues and conflicts when they are small and manageable, rather than letting them accumulate and grow into larger, more difficult problems.

LESSONS FROM PESACH CLEANING

DON'TLETTHEMESS EVENGETSTARTED.

DON’T LET THE MESS EVEN GET STARTED.

It is far easier to KEEP your home clean than to have to try cleaning a messy house once it gets to the paralyzing mess stage.

If your house is generally clean and then you have a kid’s birthday party and the house gets messy – that kind of mess is fairly easy to clean. But the other kind of mess – the piles and clutter and accumulated junk – is much harder to tackle. Ideally, you wouldn’t let that kind of mess happen at all.

Adopt good organizing and cleaning habits. Address those piles when they are small; put papers away right away (read: address issues when they are small). Set up cleaning schedules to maintain order (read: date nights).

Similarly, in your marriage and relationships, it is easier to maintain a healthy relationship by adopting good habits early on and addressing issues as they arise, to prevent bigger problems from developing later on. Set up date nights to keep your marriage in top shape and make sure to communicate regularly with your partner. Don't let small problems fester and turn into larger issues that are more difficult to resolve. Prevention is always easier than cure.

CREATESYSTEMSTO MAINTAINSTRUCTURE.

LESSONS FROM PESACH CLEANING

CREATE SYSTEMS TO MAINTAIN STRUCTURE.

“A place for everything, everything in its place” keeps things organized. Walk through your home and find a place and system for everything. Make sure it is manageable for everyone in the home.

You may find it worthwhile to develop the systems as a team. You’ll get more buy-in from all. And you never know what kind of great ideas you’ll get from your family. And then communicate it to all. It is important that everyone knows the ‘where and how’ of the systems.

Be accepting and forgiving as everyone learns the new systems.

Lastly, review the systems periodically to see that they really make sense for the way your family lives. Adjust accordingly.

Similarly, successful marriage and relationship require the creation of mutually agreed-upon systems to maintain structure, clear communication and periodic adjustments to ensure they make sense for both partners. Remember to be accepting and forgiving as everyone adapts to the changes.

THROWOUTWHAT DOESN'TSERVE APURPOSEINYOURLIFE.

LESSONS FROM PESACH CLEANING

THROW OUT WHAT DOESN’T SERVE A PURPOSE IN YOUR LIFE.

Take inventory of the stuff in your home. Reflect: Does it bring you joy? Does it make your life better? When you brought it into your life, it may have served a purpose. But if it doesn’t anymore, get rid of it.

Over the years, you may have picked up defense mechanisms, habits, attitudes, or beliefs to help you plow through life. Every so often, it is worthwhile to do an inventory of your life and reflect on the usefulness of certain behaviors and attitudes.

Do you stress over small things? Do you deflect responsibility? Do you criticize?

Dump, dump, dump. And replace them with better habits that bring joy to you and those around you.

Similarly, in marriage and relationships, it is important to periodically take inventory of your habits, attitudes, and behaviors and let go of those that no longer serve a purpose or bring joy to you and your partner, replacing them with healthier and more positive alternatives.

YOUDON'TJUSTGET ANEWHOUSEJUST BECAUSEITIS AMESSNOW.

LESSONS FROM PESACH CLEANING

YOU DON’T GET A NEW HOUSE JUST BECAUSE IT IS A MESS NOW.

It may seem overwhelming and paralyzing to tackle the mess. It is just too big.

But the truth is moving and starting all over again is hard too. And if you don’t change your cleaning habits, you’ll have a mess in the new place too.

It is usually worth trying to reclaim your current home. You may need help and support to tackle it all. But it can be done. And you may even find some treasures that you thought were long lost.

Similarly, reclaim your marriage before it gets into a paralyzing mess. Don't give up on your marriage just because it's going through a rough patch. You may find that by putting in the effort to reclaim your marriage, you can rediscover the love and joy that brought you together in the first place.

TAKECAREOFTHAT WHICHISIMPORTANT TOYOU.

LESSONS FROM PESACH CLEANING

TAKE CARE OF THAT WHICH IS IMPORTANT TO YOU.

To ensure that what is important to you stays in good condition, take proper care of it. Neglecting it can result in it falling into disarray or ruin, which can be more costly and time-consuming to fix than preventing deterioration in the first place.

Don’t just leave it to chance or the elements. Protect it. Maintain it. Safeguard it.

By regularly maintaining your home, you will become more familiar with it and feel more secure and safe living in it. You'll know that everything is working efficiently and any quirks are being addressed. This will reduce the things you need to worry about, allowing you to better enjoy your home.

Similarly, in marriage and relationships, it is important to take care of the important aspects of your partnership, regularly maintaining and safeguarding them to prevent deterioration and to promote a sense of security and well-being within the relationship.

STARTWITH SOMETHINGSMALL SOYOUSEESOME SUCCESSQUICKLY.

LESSONS FROM PESACH CLEANING

START WITH SOMETHING SMALL SO

YOU SEE SOME SUCCESS QUICKLY.

To avoid feeling overwhelmed and demotivated, it's important to start with something small and manageable when tackling a big task like preparing for Pesach. Choose one corner, closet, or drawer to clean and organize, and focus on seeing quick results.

These early successes will give you the energy and motivation to continue tackling larger areas.

Small successes and improvements can accumulate over time, leading to big successes.

Similarly, in your marriage and other relationships… Small acts of kindness, thoughtful gestures and positive interactions can accumulate and strengthen a relationship over time. Don't underestimate the power of small successes in building and maintaining strong relationships.

PROGRESS. NOTPERFECTION.

LESSONS FROM PESACH CLEANING

PROGRESS, NOT PERFECTION.

Sometimes the project is so big, we don’t know what steps to take to get us there. The goal can seem overwhelming; we may feel we don’t have the know-how, time or the resources. Or we don’t see what steps we can take to get ourselves there.

Oftentimes, this is because we set unrealistic expectations or we take on too much at one time. And we believe that if don’t complete it to perfection, we’re a failure.

Perfection should never be the goal because the outcome will always be failure.

Focus on progress, not perfection. On the process, on the now, not the outcome. On the small steps along the way. The small changes. One at a time. And celebrate the small gains.

It can be empowering to look at the progress you’ve made in spite of challenges you’ve faced. This can help to propel you forward. Keep making progress. Keep moving forward.

Similarly, in your marriage and other relationships… keep making progress … keep moving forward.

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