The Weekly Bean - September 14, 2023 by yourwestcentral

NEW FALL STOCK Arriving Daily

Brain Cramps by Famous People

Comments made by famous people, without much thought:

“Smoking kills. If you’re killed, you’ve lost a very important part of your life.” - Brooke Shields, during an interview to become Spokesperson for federal anti-smoking campaign.

“Outside of the killings, Washington has one of the lowest crime rates in the country.” - Mayor Marion Barry, Washington, DC.

“I’m not going to have some reporters pawing through our papers. We are the president.” - Hillary Clinton commenting on the release of subpoenaed documents.

“It isn’t pollution that’s harming the environment. It’s the impurities in our air and water that are doing it.” - Al Gore, Vice President

“I love California. I practically grew up in Phoenix.” - Dan Quayle

“We’ve got to pause and ask ourselves: How much clean air do we need?”Lee Iacocca

“We don’t necessarily discriminate. We simply exclude certain types of people.” - Colonel Gerald Wellman, ROTC Instructor.

Story from a Kansas State Highway Patrol ofﬁcer:

I made a traﬃc stop on an elderly lady the other day for speeding just East of Sedan, KS.

I asked for her driver’s license, registration, and proof of insurance.

The lady took out the required information and handed it to me.

In with the cards I was somewhat surprised (due to her advanced age) to see she had a conceal carry permit. I looked at her and ask if she had a weapon in her possession at this time.

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She responded that she indeed had a .45 automatic in her glove box. Something ... body language, or the way she said it ... made me want to ask if she had any other ﬁrearms. She did admit to also having a 9mm Glock in her center console. Now I had to ask one more time if that was all.

She responded once again that she did have just one more, a .38 special in her purse. I then asked her what she is so afraid of.

She looked me right in the eye and said, “Not a darn thing!”

EATONIA

SUNDAY, SEPTEMBER 17

• 43rd annual Terry Fox Marathon of Hope. Registration begins at 12:30 PM at the Eatonia Arena. The run will start from the arena at 1:00 PM. Walk, run or ride! Snacks and door prizes to follow. Contact Pam 306-430-7173 for more info.

MONDAY, SEPTEMBER 18

• Monday BINGO starts at 1:30 PM at TJ’s Pub & Grub. Presented by St. Paul’s Church Senior’s Quilting Club. Cost is $5.00 for six games. 19+ welcome. For more info call 306460-8975.

SATURDAY, SEPTEMBER 23

• Paint Night at TJ’s Pub & Grub. Class starts at 7:00 PM sharp. Seating at 6:45. Call 306967-2227 for more information.

SATURDAY, OCTOBER 21

• Eatonia Library Board presents a dance with DJ after the Murder Mystery event (which has sold out!) 9:00 PM.

COLEVILLE

SUNDAY, SEPTEMBER 24

• Coleville Fowl Supper at the Coleville Community Hall. Doors open at 5:00 PM. All proceeds to support Coleville Playschool and the new development of Coleville Licensed Daycare. For any questions or if you would like to donate, please contact Teneal at 306-4301188 or Stacey at 306-430-7788.

ESTON

SATURDAY, SEPTEMBER 30

• Prairie West Historical Society (Eston Museum) is holding their annual “Pie Social” at the Holy Cross Anglican Church from 2:00-4:00 PM.

* Wheatland Centre Potluck Supper fourth Friday of each month 6:00 PM. $5.00. Bring your own utensils. Coffee & tea provided.

* Wheatland Centre Bingo - 1st & 3rd Thursday of the month 7:00 PM. Regular Bingo

plus Bonanza, 50/50 Draw. Must be 14 years of age. Call 306-962-7117 (ask for Linda) for more info.

HOOSIER

SUNDAY SERVICE

• Hoosier Community Church 10:30 am at the Community Hall. Contact Joel Hamm 306-4607056 or Curtis Kornelson 306-460-7327.

KERROBERT

WEDNESDAY, SEPTEMBER 20

• National Tree Day 2023. We need your help! The Town of Kerrobert is having a tree planting event. We will have the trees. Bring your gloves and help us green up Kerrobert! 1:00 PM at the Kerrobert Fairgrounds. Refreshments will be served.

SATURDAY, OCTOBER 7

• 2023 Harvest Festival Parade 10:00 AM. Businesses, organizations, families, etc. are welcome to enter a ﬂoat! Kids: decorate & ride your bike!

• Harvest Festival Hoedown 9:00 PM at the Prairieland Community Centre. $10 admission. Children under 12 free. Featuring Gypsy Renegades. Family friendly event. Designated drivers available.

* Storytime at the Kerrobert Library the ﬁrst and third Thursday of every month at 10:30 AM.

* Anne Nordstrom “Africa and Abstracts” A collection of acrylic paintings inﬂuenced by the colour and light of Africa 7:00 PM at the Kerrobert Courtroom Gallery. Exhibition runs until August 31.

KINDERSLEY

SUNDAY, SEPTEMBER 17

• Kindersley Terry Fox Walk 2023 starting at 1:00 PM at the Motherwell Beach & Recreation Area. Stop by between 12:30-1:00 to register in person.

THURSDAY, SEPTEMBER 21

• Day #1 of Kindersley’s Goose Festival Days!

FRIDAY, SEPTEMBER 22

• Day #2 of Kindersley’s Goose Festival Days!

• Music Trivia Night 7:00 PM. $10 at the door. Teams of 6 or less. Norman Ritchie Centre.

SATURDAY, SEPTEMBER 23

• Day #3 of Kindersley’s Goose Festival Days!

• Kinsmen & Kinette Club of Kindersley Duck Derby at 1:00 PM. Buy your tickets online at www.kindersleykinclub.ca

• PDRA Touring Series (Hobby, Street, Mod.), Legends Touring Series, Stock Truck at Flatlanders Speedway 3:00 PM. Admission $10.

SUNDAY, SEPTEMBER 24

• Day #4 of Kindersley’s Goose Festival Days!

• PDRA Touring Series (Hobby, Street, Mod.), Legends Touring Series, Stock Truck at Flatlanders Speedway 1:00 PM. Admission $10.

• Antique Threshing Club Demo at the Kindersley & District Plains Museum starting at 12:00 Noon. Food on site. 1903 Steam Engine will be featured as well as a 1920 Rumely Oil Pull Tractor.

WEDNESDAY, SEPTEMBER 27

• West Central Crisis Centre Annual General Meeting 7:00 PM at Morgotch Law Ofﬁce.

SATURDAY, OCTOBER 14

• Donations wanted for United Church Garage Sale. Open 9:00 to 4:00. No clothes please. Can bring items anytime over summer. Arrange drop-off with Church Ofﬁce or Mary. For more information: 306-463-6508 or 306-4607450.

* Parkinson’s Support Group Meetings are held the second Wednesday of the month 2:00 PM at the Kindersley Hospital. Everyone is welcome! For more info call Nancy at 306-4634514.

* Monday Night Jam Sessions at the Norman Ritchie Community Centre. Doors open at 6:30 to set-up, then the fun begins at 7-11 PM. Call Keith 306-460-8633.

* Interested in a support group for weight management? TOPS meetings; every Monday at 6:00 PM in the Kindersley Senior Centre OR contact Jill at 306-463-4210.

Celebrity Extra

Is the new “Equalizer” movie related in any way to the past and present TV series “The Equalizer”? Will Denzel Washington ever appear on the series? — K.S.

A:The original version of “The Equalizer,” a TV series starring Edward Woodward that ran from 19851989, is about a retired intelligence agent turned private detective who takes the law into his own hands. In 2021, CBS came up with a reboot featuring Queen Latifah as the headliner. Both characters have the last name McCall.

In 2014, the big-screen version of “The Equalizer” starring Denzel Washington premiered. He, too, plays a McCall, but reportedly none of these characters with the same surname are related. “The Equalizer 3,” starring Washington and Dakota Fanning, is currently in theaters.

Andrew Marlowe, creator of CBS’s current series “The Equalizer,” says that there are no plans for these two franchises to merge, even for a special episode. Marlowe told Distractify.com, “For us, it really is about building this show and identity around Robyn McCall and being very specific to a show where Queen is really embodying the heart of it.” ***

Will there be another season of “The Crown” anytime soon? I wonder if they plan to continue it through to the current day when Charles becomes king? — L.L.

A:Peter

Morgan, creator of the critically acclaimed Netflix series “The Crown,” previously stated that the show would end after five seasons. However, NetflixUK recently released a tweet confirming that the series will be back for one final season this fall, but the story is not expected to end at the present day when Prince Charles becomes king.

We do know that the storyline will make it to at least 2005, when Charles and Camilla Parker Bowles wed. It’s also been confirmed that it will touch on the tragic death of Princess Diana (played by Elizabeth Debicki), but there won’t be a scene featuring the actual impact of the crash that killed her. A Netflix source confirmed to IndieWire that the scenes

surrounding the princess’ death were filmed with “enormous sensitivity” and have been “delicately and thoughtfully” filmed.

According to Parade, Morgan does not plan to delve into the story of Prince Harry and Meghan Markle’s exodus from the royal family or the subsequent fallout from Harry’s memoir. He emphasized that featuring the two would “seem almost redundant since the couple are constantly in the press.” ***

Is it true that Woody Allen has another movie coming out? Are any of his past stars in it? — L.J.

A:Controversial

film director Woody Allen recently premiered his newest project “Coup de Chance” at the Venice Film Festival. His 50th film received a five-minute standing ovation by the audience at the festival, a positive response that is said to have shocked Allen.

The movie, a dramatic French language thriller, will be released in France on Sept. 27, but a U.S. premiere has yet to be announced.

Send me your questions at NewCelebrityExtra@gmail.com, or write me at KFWS, 628 Virginia Drive, Orlando, FL 32803.

Denzel Washington stars in “The Equalizer 3.”

Courtesy of Columbia Pictures

Photo Credit: Courtesy of Columbia Pictures

Photo Caption: Denzel Washington stars in

1. U.S. STATES: Which state is home to a giant sequoia tree named General Sherman?

2. ANIMAL KINGDOM: Is a rhinoceros an herbivore, omnivore or carnivore?

3. GEOGRAPHY: Which city in India is home to the Taj Mahal?

4. MOVIES: What is the title of the first James Bond movie?

5. TELEVISION: What was the product featured in the first TV advertisement?

6. GENERAL KNOWLEDGE: Which French fashion designer is credited with inventing the Little Black Dress?

7. FOOD & DRINK: What does it mean to julienne vegetables?

8. GOVERNMENT: What does the acronym GDP stand for in economic terms?

9. LITERATURE: What is the cat’s name in Shakespeare’s “Macbeth”?

10. SCIENCE: Who is considered the father of the atomic bomb?

Answers

1. California, Sequoia National Park.

2. An herbivore, a plant eater.

3. Agra.

4. “Dr. No.”

5. Bulova watch.

6. Coco Chanel.

7. Cut into short, thin strips.

8. Gross domestic product.

9. Grimalkin.

10. J. Robert Oppenheimer.

By Lucie Winborne

• In 2003, a community in New Jersey experienced an animal-related electrical outage. Such occurrences were certainly not rare, but this incident was notable for being the first time an osprey was known to be involved — or, rather, a fish: The bird had dropped its scaly prey on the power lines.

• Slovenia boasts a most impressive 28,000 wineries, amounting to one winery for every 75 persons in the country.

• Ever hear “things that go bump in the night” at your house? Before you call an exorcist, keep in mind that several cases of residential “paranormal activity” have actually turned out to be the result of carbon monoxide poisoning, which can cause hallucinations and feelings of dread.

• The Mamenchisaurus sinocanadorum dinosaur’s neck measured 50 feet — six times longer than that of a giraffe!

• When he was in his 50s, Steven Spielberg re-enrolled at California State, Long Beach to finish his B.A. degree three decades after dropping out. The school awarded him three course credits in paleontology for making “Jurassic Park.”

• Japan’s “gyoza cider” is a soda designed to taste like gyoza dumplings.

• In 2018, one of Stephen Hawking’s older wheelchairs was auctioned off for $387,000, with proceeds donated to his favorite charities.

• Basketball backboards were invented to keep overly enthusiastic fans from interfering with a game after some spectators, early in the sport’s history, leaned over railings in an effort to deflect or catch the ball.

• New York-Presbyterian Hospital has created a Spotify playlist called “Songs to do CPR to,” featuring hits by artists ranging from the Bee Gees to Justin

Thought for the Day: we should hear at least one little song, read one good poem, see one exquisite picture and, if possible, speak a few sensible words.” —

TARNES ELECTRIC

to work outside & climb ladders

- Able to work with others and independently

- Must hold a valid driver’s licence

Please apply to tarnes.electric@sasktel.net Attn: Kim or drop off a resume at 110 - 9th Ave. E., Kindersley

24 HR DISPATCH: 306-463-5898

OFFICE: 306-463-1454

EMAIL: operations@gpefluids.ca

1101 - 9th Ave. West, Kindersley, Sask.

“Small” enough to care, “Big” enough to supply

Brian Zinchuk: How

signiﬁcant

is Crescent Point’s attention turning from Saskatchewan to Alberta?

Twice last week, SaskEnergy set new daily natural gas usage records, and we can thank Alberta for most of our supply

BY BRIAN ZINCHUK brian.zinchuk@pipelineonline.ca

Earlier this week, I posted a signiﬁcant story entitled, “Once Saskatchewan’s largest oil company, Crescent Point plans to spend 70% of its capex in Alberta.” One person online wondered about its signiﬁcance. And indeed, he had a point. After all, what has Crescent Point meant to Saskatchewan?

Not only was Saskatchewan setting electrical consumption records during the cold snap of last week of December, we also set two consecutive natural gas consumption records, too.

It turns out, a lot. So let me lay out some context for the average Saskatchewan resident:

According to SaskEnergy in a Dec. 31 release, “Extreme cold weather across Saskatchewan this week resulted in record-breaking natural gas demand in the province. On December 28 and 29, natural gas consumption surpassed the previous daily record of 1.57 petajoules (PJ) which was set in February 2021.

• The “Bakken Boom” of 2008-2014, which included over a billion dollars of land sales in 2008, was largely driven by Crescent Point. Most of that billion dollars in land sales that year, the year Saskatchewan paid oﬀ a huge chunk of debt, was directly from Crescent Point. Remember when the provincial government had that huge surplus in 2008? Crescent Point was a huge factor in that.

“A new daily record of 1.62 PJ was set on December 28 and broken again on December 29 with total system delivery of 1.64 PJ. Delivery numbers for December 30 and 31 are not yet finalized, but are also expected to exceed 1.6 PJ.”

The natural gas records coincided with record power consumption. On Dec. 29, SaskPower set another record in power consumption for Saskatchewan. At 5:27 p.m. on Dec. 29, 2021, Saskatchewan homes and businesses reached 3,868 megawatts (MW) in power use, according to the Crown corporation. The previous record of 3,792 MW was reached four years ago to the day, on Dec. 29, 2017.

Saskatchewan’s power production has increasingly shifted from coal to natural gas as a fuel source. In December, Boundary Dam Unit 4, a coal-fired generating unit, was retired, reducing the Boundary Dam Power Station to 672 megawatts capacity. On the natural gas side, Saskatchewan has seen the construction of several new natural gas-fired power plants. They include the baseload North Battleford Power Station (289 megawatts), Yellowhead Power Station peaking plant (also at North Battleford, 135 megawatts), the baseload Chinook Power Station at Swift Current (353 megawatts) and peaking plant Spy Hill Power Station (89 megawatts). Another 353 megawatt baseload

• Their prodigious activity drove thousands of high paying jobs in Estevan, Weyburn, Carlyle, Carnduff, Midale, Stoughton, Torquay, Lampman, Benson, Arcola, Redvers, Gainsborough, Oungre, Shaunavon, Kindersley and more, literally spending billions per year, mostly with oilfield service companies, who in turn paid wages. See, in Saskatchewan, the oilpatch isn’t really about the oil companies, but the hundreds of oilfield services companies who employ thousands of people that work for those oil companies. And those people then bought trucks, quads, boats, RVs, houses, Riders tickets, restaurant meals and more.

• Millions of people across Canada, through mutual funds or direct stock ownership, or pension plans or other institutional investors, made billions oﬀ Crescent Point.

• This happened because this was the era of the junior oil producer. Many of the

24 HR DISPATCH: 306-460-8684

plant, very similar to Chinook, is under construction at Moose Jaw.

oil majors once had a signiﬁcant presence in Saskatchewan. Mobil was around Gull Lake. Shell was at Midale. Imperial Oil was northeast of Estevan. But over time, they all left. And junior oil producers rose up in their place.

All of this added natural gas-fired power generation has, in turn, driven higher usage of natural gas during times of high electrical consumption.

The Crown noted that increased demand from SaskEnergy’s industrial customers, including natural gas use for power production, was the main driver of this week’s record-setting consumption.

• The junior producer model worked like this – start a company, build up some land and production, often to around 1,000-1,500 barrels per day. Sell it to a larger company, and start over. And over. And over. Some management teams did this four times, or more. And who was the buyer in many of those cases? Crescent Point.

SaskEnergy said it measures daily natural gas consumption for the 24-hour period from 9:00 a.m. to 9:00 a.m. A PJ is a unit of measurement equivalent to one million gigajoules (GJ) of natural gas. An average Saskatchewan home consumes about 100 GJ of natural gas each year.

“SaskEnergy’s natural gas system design can accommodate additional capacity to manage increased consumption even on peak days,” SaskEnergy president and CEO Ken From said in a release. “Throughout the year, SaskEnergy employees inspect, maintain and enhance the system to support safe and reliable natural gas delivery in all weather conditions. In addition, employees monitor the system 24 hours a day to ensure sufficient system capacity to meet customer demand across the province.”

This province is now largely dependent on neighbouring Alberta to fulfill roughly two-thirds of our natural gas needs.

• At one point, Crescent Point accounted for roughly one out of every four barrels of oil produced in Saskatchewan. And at that time, oil royalties were paying up to 20 per cent of the provincial budget’s revenues, while health care was consuming about 39 per cent of the budget’s expenses. That meant that oil was paying for roughly every single doctor, nurse, hospital, old folks home, Xray, MRI and more south of Lumsden – including Regina –and Crescent Point was paying for roughly one quarter of that half.

When natural gas prices took a tumble roughly 14 years ago, Saskatchewan’s domestic gas production fell off a cliff. Targeted gas drilling went essentially extinct, with next to no gas-specific wells being drilled in this province for most of the past decade. Our domestic gas production is now largely based on associated gas production that comes with oil production. As a result, Saskatchewan went from being a net gas exporter for the period of 1988 to 2009 to a net importer that year.

• On health care – it was Crescent Point that got the ball over the line in leading the fundraising to get STARS air ambulance ﬁnally going in Saskatchewan. While Potash Corp eventually donated a lot more money, Crescent Point was the key leader in that endeavor. If they hadn’t done that, it might have been several more years before getting a helicopter air ambulance here. If we had STARS in 1997 when my grandfather had a stroke, maybe he wouldn’t have been stricken so badly, eventually dying a slow death as a shadow of what he once was. STARS also responded the night my sister died. It matters. And because of STARS, fewer families have gone through

HR DISPATCH: 306-460-4054 OFFICE: 306-463-6337

EMAIL: carthurs@gtgt.ca

1101 - 9th Ave. West, Kindersley, Sask.

“Small” enough to care, “Big” enough to supply

LR RANGER HOLDINGS LTD.

what we did, because corporate citizens like Crescent Point stepped up.

• Before they started selling oﬀ land in 2018, Crescent Point controlled huge swaths of land across southeast and southwest Saskatchewan. Over the course of something like 30 acquisitions, almost every one of those made the sellers rich, and those sellers often went on and reinvested a large portion of that money back into Saskatchewan (see above).

• They were really hard on oilfield service providers to cut costs when the 7-year downturn hit around Christmas of 2014. But when nearly all other oil companies pulled their horns in and stopped spending money, Crescent Point did not. They kept going, even if they were paying less. That kept a huge portion of the industry afloat for several years, even if those service companies weren’t exactly happy about the situation. For several of those years, Crescent Point often employed more drilling rigs in Canada then the No. 2 and No. 3 oil companies combined. They may have been lean times, but lean was better than starvation, which is what most of the rest of the oil business was doing. In February, 2018, Crescent Point employed 29 drilling rigs, 27 of which were in Saskatchewan. They kept the industry afloat when no one else was.

• Despite being based in Calgary, Crescent Point, along with Husky, were Saskatchewan’s oil industry corporate champions – Crescent Point for a decade, Husky for decades.

And now, Crescent Point’s activity and• involvement in Saskatchewan is a shadow of its former self. While Whitecap Resources has in a small way picked up where Crescent Point seems to have left

oﬀ, at this point it’s nowhere close. And as a result, all those towns listed above, and the province as a whole, are feeling the diﬀerence.

• While Crescent Point is still very much present in Saskatchewan, and still one of the top oil producers, it is abundantly clear that its attention has turned to greener pastures in Alberta. Their budget announcement on Sept. 11 said, “The remaining capital budget will be allocated to the company’s long-cycle assets in Saskatchewan. This area provides Crescent Point with a combination of high-return locations and low-decline production that generates signiﬁcant excess cash ﬂow.” In other words, it’s a cash cow to be milked.

• On Tuesday, I drove through Crescent Point’s Torquay ﬁeld. I saw one frac spread and two service rigs there, but no drilling rigs. At one point, they had nine drilling rigs working in an area not much larger than a township, service rigs everywhere, and a few frac spreads to boot. The quiet, today, is deafening in comparison.

• Love them or hate them, without Crescent Point from 2008-2018, almost everyone in Saskatchewan, and Saskatchewan itself, would have been poorer as a result.

So is Crescent Point’s attention turning from Saskatchewan to Alberta signiﬁcant? You bet it is. This has happened before, and will likely happen again. But in the meantime, we in the industry wonder who will be the next driver in southern Saskatchewan’s oilpatch? Time will tell.

Brian Zinchuk is editor and owner of Pipeline Online. He can be reached at brian.zinchuk@pipelineonline.ca.

1-306-460-7011 chingconstruction@hotmail.com Kindersley, SK

KINDERSLEY

1. The Equalizer 3 (R) Denzel Washington, Dakota Fanning

2. Barbie (PG-13) Margot Robbie, Ryan Gosling

3. Blue Beetle (PG-13) Xolo Maridueña, Bruna Marquezine

4. Gran Turismo (PG-13) David Harbour, Orlando Bloom

5. Oppenheimer (R) Cillian Murphy, Emily Blunt

6. Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Mutant Mayhem (PG) Micah Abbey, Shamon Brown Jr.

7. Bottoms (R) Rachel Sennott, Ayo Edebiri

8. Meg 2: The Trench (PG-13) Jason Statham, Jing Wu

9. Strays (R) Will Ferrell, Jamie Foxx

10. Talk to Me (R) Ari McCarthy, Hamish Phillips

TAX TIPS

CHANGES IN YOUR FAMILY CIRCUMSTANCES?

Inform the Canada Revenue Agency (CRA) if there are any changes in your family circumstances which could affect your GST/HST credit. Examples include a change in marital status or a change in the number of children in yur care. The change will be reflected in your next quarterly GST/HST payment.

H&R BLOCK

CENTRE

Kindersley & District CO-OP

Kid’s Korner

KID’S CLUB BIRTHDAYS FOR SEPTEMBER 17-23, 2023

Barrett Adamson

Elodie Becker

Stanislaw Furmaga

Cooper Gerein

Johnny Hunter

Michael Tom Kleinsasser

James Kleinsasser

Izack Kleinsasser

James Kleinsasser

Sarah Kleinsasser

Vincent Larocque

Koen Lehman

Kaeson Rayner

Jade Somerville

Sierra Wagner

Johnny Wurz

Posting Date September 11, 2023

LIBRA (September 23 to October 22) People have always relied on your integrity not only to get a job done, but to get it done right. So don’t be pressured by anyone into cutting corners to save time.

ARIES (March 21 to April 19)

With your Arian charm quotient at an almost all-time high this week, plus all the facts you have to back you up, you just might win over the last doubters of your proposal.

306-463-2432

TAURUS (April 20 to May 20) You might be in line for that job change you applied for. But be advised that you could be called on to defend your qualifications against supporters of other applicants.

Legislative

Legislative Assembly of Saskatchewan

Ken Francis, MLA Kindersley Constituency

SCORPIO (October 23 to November 21) While others might get rattled over unexpected changes, your ability to adapt calmly and competently helps you make a positive impression during a crucial period.

SAGITTARIUS (November 22 to December 21) A changing environment might be daunting for some, but the adventurous Sagittarian takes it all in stride. A friend from the past could awaken some meaningful memories.

Constituency Office

Ken Francis, MLA

Kindersley Constituency

Unit 5, 1001 Main St. PO Box 2620 Kindersley, SK S0L 1S0

Phone: 306-463-4446 kfrancismla@gmail.com

GEMINI (May 21 to June 20) Creating a new approach to an old idea is one way to get beyond that workplace impasse. There’s no such problems in your personal life, though, as things continue to flow smoothly.

Constituency Office

Unit 5, 1001 Main St. PO Box 2620

Kindersley, SK S0L 1S0

Phone: 306-463-4446 kfrancismla@gmail.com

CANCER (June 21 to July 22) Be more forthcoming about your feelings concerning a proposed change either in your workplace or in your personal life. Your opinions are valuable. Don’t keep them hidden.

LEO (July 23 to August 22) A changing situation in your life needs more patience than you appear to be willing to offer. Allowing it to develop at its own pace is the wisest course you can take at this time.

well-being and a renewed sense of purpose. 213 Main St., Kindersley 306-463-1033 Book online at www.tranquilwaterspa.ca

VIRGO (August 23 to September 22) With more stability in your life — both on personal and professional levels — this could be a good time to strengthen relationships with both friends and colleagues.

CAPRICORN (December 22 to January 19) With your self-assurance rising to full strength, the bold Goat should feel confident about opening up to new ventures as well as new relationships.

AQUARIUS (January 20 to February 18) Reaching out to someone who has been unkind to you might not be easy. But in the long run, it will prove to have been the right thing to do. A friend offers moral support.

PISCES (February 19 to March 20) Your keen insight once again helps you work through a seemingly insoluble problem in your workplace. The weekend offers a good chance to develop new relationships.

When Grandma Goes To Court... Look Out!

Lawyers should never ask a Grandma a question if they aren’t prepared for the answer.

In a trial in Mississippi, a Southern small-town prosecuting attorney called his ﬁrst witness to the stand ... a grandmotherly, elderly woman. He approached her and asked, “Mrs. Jones, do you know me?”

She responded, “Why, yes, I do know you, Mr. Williams. I’ve known you since you were a boy, and frankly you’ve been a big disappointment to me. You lie, you cheat on your wife, and you manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs. You think you’re a big shot, when you haven’t got the brains to realize you’ll never amount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I know you.”

The lawyer was stunned. Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across the room and asked,

“Mrs. Jones, do you know the defense attorney?”

She again replied, “Why yes, I do. I’ve known Mr. Bradley since he was a youngster, too. He’s lazy, bigoted, and he has a drinking problem. He can’t build a normal relationship with anyone, and his law practice is one of the worst in the entire state... not to mention, he cheated on his wife with three diﬀerent women. One of them was your wife. Yes, I know him.”

The defense attorney nearly died on the spot.

The judge asked both counselors to approach the bench and, in a very quiet voice, said... “If either of you idiots asks her if she knows me, I’ll send you both to the electric chair.”

THE SILENT TREATMENT

A man and his wife were having some problems at home and were giving each other the silent treatment.

Suddenly, the man realized that the next day, he would need his wife to wake him at 5:00 AM for an early morning business ﬂight.

Not wanting to be the ﬁrst to break the silence (and LOSE), he wrote o n a piece of paper, “Please wake me at 5:00 AM.” He left it where he knew she would ﬁnd it.

The next morning, the man woke up, only to discover it was 9:00 AM and he had missed his ﬂight. Furious, he was about to go and see why his wife hadn’t wakened him, when he noticed a piece of paper by the bed.

The paper said, “It is 5:00 AM. Wake up.”

Men are not equipped for these kinds of contests.