A Guide To Traditional Weddings

A GUIDE TO TRADITIONAL WEDDINGS

Belynda Wong

“TRADITIONS ARE MEANT TO BE PRESERVED & ADORNED BECAUSE THERE IS ALWAYS SOMETHING REALLY SACRED & ALLURING ABOUT EACH RITUAL, ESPECIALLY WITH REGARDS TO WEDDINGS.”

bridestory.com

PREFACE Singapore is often depicted as a little red dot on the world map but don’t be fooled by its size. This country is brimming with a mixture of various ethnicities and cultures. Hence, with that many cultures comes an abundance of traditions.

Tradition is defined as a belief or behaviour of symbolic meaning that is passed down within a community. Traditions are important because they help pass down values and stories from the older generations to the younger ones. It’s important to preserve them because they help build the identity of a community which eventually shapes the identities of those individuals who are part of it. Not only are traditions expressions of a community’s worldview but they also help celebrate significant occasions.

One of the most important occasions in a person’s life is their wedding.

Cultural weddings consist of a plethora of customs and traditions. Even though in this day and age some of the older traditions have died down due

to the changes in society, majority of the younger generation still choose to include traditions as it reminds them of their roots while also celebrating their culture. Besides, carrying on these traditions would definitely appease the elders in the family. (Soh, 2012) With that said, this book is created to act as your guide through the various wedding customs, symbols and traditions practiced by Singapore’s main cultures— Chinese, Indian and Malay, on their special day. You’d be surprised at how even the smallest detail can signify certain things within the culture.

This guide not only gives you some insight to the rituals that each culture practices during their wedding but it also sheds some light on how colour, food, flowers and even jewellery play a part in tying the special day together.

Weddings alone are considered very important events so a traditional wedding is bound to be even more sacred as there are many customs and rituals within each culture that the couple has to abide by. In this book, I’ll only be covering a few of the traditions practiced.

“TO THE CHINESE, TRADITIONS SHOW RESPECT FOR THEIR ANCESTRY AND ARE THE CORNERSTONES OF THEIR CULTURE”

Hannah Chong, founder and creative director of Heaven’s Gift

KNOW YOUR

COLOURS Each colour, as straightforward as it looks, holds its own meaning.

For example, the colour pink is often associated with health, while the colour purple signifies royalty. Therefore, with Chinese culture is incredibly rich, there is no doubt that the Chinese would link colours to symbols within every ritual, ceremony and festival. In fact, Chinese culture’s take on colour symbolism is much more powerful as compared to that of the west. (Olesen, n.d.)

With the strong significance of colours in the culture, there’s bound to be a few that should be avoided. For instance, wearing too much black or white could symbolize bad luck to the couple as these colours symbolize mourning and death.

However,colours with warm tones like peach, pink or lavender represent a new life and also happiness in Chinese culture so wearing those colours not only shows support to the newlyweds but also wishes them good luck in their marriage and life.

KNOW YOUR COLOURS

RED

The colour red symbolizes a handful of things like luck, prosperity, happiness, vitality and joy.

It is a colour often worn by brides as it is considered to be a favourable colour for warding off evil. Red also represents energy, celebration and fertility. With this much significance, red is probably the most important and popular colour used in Chinese culture. However, do be mindful because despite the colour red being an auspicious colour in the Chinese culture, wearing it to a wedding could be considered impolite as the brides are the ones who usually wear red.

KNOW YOUR COLOURS

GREEN Green is often linked to health, prosperity & often represents anything organic.

The symbolism of the colour green is very much similar in both western and traditional Chinese culture as it represents harmony, wealth and growth. However, do be mindful as to how you use this colour because it is said that an individual wearing a green hat is thought to have an unfaithful spouse or partner. Thus, with this colour’s symbolism being on two different ends of the spectrum, it is good to be aware as to how to use it. (Olsen, n.d.)

KNOW YOUR COLOURS

GOLD Green is often linked to health, prosperity & often represents anything organic.

Traditionally, gold could only be used by emperors as it symbolises a higher, royal status. However, in this day and age, the colour gold is often used as it represents power, royalty, as well as, prosperity. People often combine red and gold as it gives off a strong sense of happiness and honour.

(Zhang, 2009)

KNOW YOUR

FLOWERS The Chinese culture has an abundance of flower symbolism that is prevalent in their cultural practices.

Due to their significance, choosing the right flower for the occasion is important.

Chinese wedding flowers are mostly used for decoration on the tables and bouquets of typically red and pink flowers are often given to the bride and groom as gifts.

When there is symbolism involved, there are bound to be taboos. Part of the Chinese word for chrysanthemum, ju hua, is similar to the word ju, which means to live/ reside and also to the word jiu which means a long time. Hence, the chrysanthemum represents a long life. However, despite it having such a wholesome symbolism, chrysanthemums are mostly used for funerals! Specifically, white and pale-yellow ones are used, and the bad luck is enhanced if the chrysanthemums are cut at the stem because cut flowers are a common gift to the deceased’s family.

KNOW YOUR

FLOWERS The Chinese culture has an abundance of flower symbolism that is prevalent in their cultural practices.

Due to their significance, choosing the right flower for the occasion is important. Chinese wedding flowers are mostly used for decoration on the tables and bouquets of typically red and pink flowers are often given to the bride and groom as gifts.

When there is symbolism involved, there are bound to be taboos. Part of the Chinese word for chrysanthemum, ju hua, is similar to the

居, which means to live/ reside and also to the word 久 which means a long time. (Mack, word

2019) Hence, the chrysanthemum represents a long life. However, despite it having such a wholesome symbolism, chrysanthemums are mostly used for funerals! Specifically, white and pale-yellow ones are used, and the bad luck is enhanced if the chrysanthemums are cut at the stem because cut flowers are a common gift to the deceased’s family.

KNOW YOUR FLOWERS

PEONIES The peony is a symbol of spring.

It also represents feminine beauty and reproduction. It also represents wealth, honour and a high social status. It is the appropriate flower for the 12th wedding anniversary of a couple. The vibrant reds and pinks of the peonies represent life and celebration, making it an appropriate flower for a wedding celebration.

KNOW YOUR FLOWERS

LILIES While white flowers represent innocence and purity in western culture, they represent the opposite in most Asian cultures and Chinese culture is no excuse.

While white flowers represent innocence and purity in western culture, they represent the opposite in most Asian cultures and Chinese culture is no excuse. White represents death and ghosts to the Chinese and are often found at funerals. However, this flower is an exception because the Chinese word for lily (bai he) sounds like part of the proverb, bai nian hao he, which means a happy union for one hundred years. It also represents the bringer of sons. (Mack, 2018)

KNOW YOUR FLOWERS

ORCHIDS Orchids are another popular flower seen at most weddings.

They symbolise love, nobility, integrity and also friendship.

They represent wealth and fortune as well. Orchids are linked to the ancient Chinese philosopher, Confucius, who equated the flower to an honourable man.

ALL ABOUT THE TEA CEREMONY Within a Chinese wedding there are a handful of rituals that are often practiced.

One of them being Guo Da Li (过大

礼), the betrothal, which is the formal engagement. This usually takes place a couple of weeks before the wedding where the groom’s family present the bride’s family with gifts to acknowledge their efforts in nurturing the bride.

However, out of all the traditions practiced, the tea ceremony is probably the most significant one. The ceremony includes formal introductions of both the bride and groom and it also acts as a time for the bride and groom to pay their respects to their parents and thank them for raising and nurturing them. (Micki, 2017)

THE HISTORY OF THE CEREMONY Over 1200 years ago, during the Tang Dynasty, the earliest record of tea ceremonies emerged.

Some Japanese monks travelled to China and brought the tradition back to Japan. Now, more influenced by the intricate Japanese culture, tea ceremonies are more formal and serious.

In the early practices of this ceremony, the bride would serve tea to her own family in private in the morning. The couple would only serve tea to the groom’s family after exchanging vows.

Nevertheless, this sequence of the tea ceremony is rarely practiced today, only being applied by very conservative families.

Today, many couples choose to pay their respects to both sides of the families by holding tea ceremonies for the both of them.

MEANING BEHIND THE CEREMONY In China, serving tea when you are entertaining guests is very traditional etiquette.

It acts as a way to show respect. In a wedding, as mentioned before, the tea ceremony serves as an act of showing respect and gratitude to the couple’s elders for their guidance throughout the years.

A tea ceremony is also a symbol of purity, stability, as well as, fertility. In fact, many aspects of the tea itself have a significance. The purity of tea stands for the pure and noble love that the couple share. The stability of tea represents faithful love and the fertility of it signifies that the couple would bear many children.

Sometimes the tea served would include lotus seeds and red dates for happiness and a good relationship with one’s in laws.

STEPS TO TAKE Modern tradition calls for the groom’s family to be served the tea first as it is deemed appropriate, followed by the family of the bride.

Usually the tea ceremony for the groom’s family would take place in the morning while the one for the bride would take place in the afternoon after the couple has completed the bride’s home visit. These days, couple prefer to hold a singular tea ceremony where they serve both sides together.

There are allocated positions during the ceremony; the groom is to stand on the right and the bride on the left.

Their parents should be seated on chairs awaiting the couple to kneel and serve the tea. When serving the tea, there is a specific order that the couple has to follow as it is crucial in showing how the couple respects their seniority.

The parents should be served first, followed by the grandparents, grand uncles and aunts, uncle and aunts, and lastly, their elder siblings.

In the past, couples were required to kneel before their elders yet in the present day, several traditions only require them to bow.

After the tea ceremony is through, the couple would then ask their younger siblings and cousins to line up and they would hand out red envelopes.

ALL ABOUT THE HAIR COMBING CEREMONY Another important tradition that is practiced is the hair combing ceremony.

This tradition dates back to ancient times and represents one’s transition into adulthood. This tradition would initially take place when a male reached his 20s and when a female was about 15 years old. After the ceremony, the young individual would be considered ready for marriage. Over the years, this coming of age tradition evolved into a pre-wedding ritual. (Micki, 2018)

WHEN & WHERE The ceremony is usually performed the night before the big day or in the early morning of the wedding day.

The specific time for the ceremony to commence varies based on the lucky time of the Chinese calendar. As for where it should be held, it is commonly performed at the respective homes of the bride and groom separately. (Micki, 2018)

WHO IS INVOLVED Apart from the bride and groom, the presence of a person of good fortune is needed to perform the ceremony.

You may wonder what qualifies one to be considered a person with good fortune. Well, a person is deemed to have good fortune if his or her parents and children are present and healthy. Both a man or a woman is eligible for the position of conducting the ceremony, but it is more common for women to perform it. Since this ceremony used to be considered a coming of age tradition, families were invited to attend as it was considered a big milestone for the individual. Now, since it is just a pre-wedding ritual, families are not required to attend. (Micki, 2018)

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ITEMS NEEDED For a bride 1. A pair of dragon & phoenix candles 2. A ruler 3. A mirror 4. A pair of scissors 5. A pair of round combs, 6. Red string 7. Red thread 8. A sewing kit

The items needed are similar for the groom’s hair combing ceremony except instead of a pair of round combs, they required a pair of pointed combs. Also, there is no need for the sewing kit.

HOW IS IT PERFORMED ?

The groom will perform the ceremony half an hour before the bride. Firstly, the bride and groom would take a bath in pomelo leaves infused water which is believed to ward off evil spirits (Micki, 2018). They would then change into a fresh set of nightwear, either red or pink in colour as these colours are deemed auspicious. Next, they will sit by a moonlit window and the items needed would be prepared. As a whole, the items required symbolize a fruitful marriage.

To begin the ceremony, the dragon phoenix candles will be lit. The bride and groom will then pray to the heavens and their ancestors.

After that, the hair will be combed four times by the assigned person while they recite these four lines:

一梳梳到尾 May you be together all your lives from beginning till the end.

二梳梳到白髮齊眉 May you have a harmonious intimate marriage till old age.

三梳梳到兒孫滿地 May you fill your home with your children, grandchildren, and great-grandchildren all over the place.

四梳梳到四條銀筍盡標齊 May you enjoy abundant wealth and an everlasting marriage.

After the combing is done, the groom will put Thuja leaves and red string in his pocket while the bride will tie them in her hair.

They would then eat glutinous rice balls (tangyuan), which symbolise a perfect and long-term marriage. Once the lit dragon phoenix candles burn out, the ceremony is completed, and the couple can go to bed.

SIGNIFICANT JEWELLERY When you first look at Chinese wedding jewellery, it may appear intimidating and sometimes gaudy due to how big and bright it may appear.

However, many pieces of wedding jewellery are laced with their own meaning and drenched in culture. Each piece whether handed down or gifted to one, holds the blessings of the giver. It carries the hopes and dreams that have been passed through the generations. The jewellery is traditionally gifted by the groom’s family as part of the bride’s dowry, this act welcomes the bride to the family who now views her as a treasured member. (Lee, 2017)

PEARLS PEARLS PEARLS PEARLS PEARLS

While in various other cultures, white pearls signify purity, innocence and faith, Chinese superstition believes that they signify tears and are thought to bring sadness. Brides are notably advised against wearing pearls on their wedding day since they’re thought to bring rears to the marriage.

Jades are believed to be living things that protect and heal the body and spirit of its owner from malicious forces. Many Chinese women believe that the jade bracelet protects from harm and will break upon the impact of a fall or injury. (Blue, 2015)

JADE JADE JADE JADE JADE

GOLD GOLD GOLD GOLD GOLD The gold jewellery that adorns the bride on her wedding day is ingrained in the rich Chinese culture as it symbolises both past traditions and her future with her spouse.

The gold jewellery would also compliment the bride’s red gown giving her a very vibrant and auspicious appearance. To add on, gold is a symbol of wealth and fortune. (Micki, 2018)

SIGNIFICANT FOOD ITEMS Most Chinese weddings nowadays have a wedding banquet with multiple courses and an array of dishes, all of which have their own special meaning.

For example, in some parts of china, a whole duck is served as it represents fidelity, peace and unity.

(Wan, 2019) However, other than the delicious dishes served, there are some of the little things that hold some significance too. From fruits to snacks to drinks, here are a few of the common food items found along with their significance.

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1. ORANGES The orange is a fruit that represents a prayer or wish for good fortune, making it the most popular food offering in Chinese culture. They are usually offered to the bride by her in laws after her wedding and she is to peel them and share them with her husband on the evening of their wedding. This fruit symbolize a wish that the couple share a harmonious and fulfilling life together. (Newman, 1996)

2. PEANUTS Peanuts are often present amongst other foods as they symbolise many things like health, longevity, prosperity, growth, stability, wealth and good fortune. (Ninchanese, 2013)

3. POMEGRANATES Pomegrantes have significance in weddings too. As a fruit full of seeds, it represents fertility. It is believed to be an appropriate marriage gift with the inscription “ 榴开百子 ” which means ‘the pomegranate brings forth a hundred seeds/sons’.

(Chinasage, 2018)

4. ALCOHOL In China, there is a saying that ‘a thousand cups of wine does not suffice when true friends meet together’, which indicates the happiness between two confidants. Drinking alcohol,

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specifically wine is essential in socialising.

“THE FRAMEWORK OF INDIAN CULTURE PLACES HUMAN BEINGS WITHIN A CONCEPTION OF THE UNIVERSE AS A DIVINE CREATION. IT CONSIDERS ALL ELEMENTS OF CREATION AS MANIFESTATIONS OF THE DIVINE.” Dr. Binod Bihari Satpathy

KNOW YOUR

COLOURS

Each colour, as straightforward as it looks, holds its own meaning. For example, the colour pink is often associated with health, while the colour purple signifies royalty.

Therefore, with Indian culture originating from a country with such a rich heritage, there is no doubt that the Indians would link colours to symbols within every ritual, ceremony and festival.

With the strong significance of colours in the culture, there’s bound to be a few that should be avoided. Similarly to the chinese culture, wearing too much or even any black or white could symbolize bad luck to the couple as these colours are usually worn at funerals and symbolize mourning and death. However, colours with warm, bright tones like peach, pink or lavender are highly encouraged as indian weddings are usually a joyous event with a riot of colours.

KNOW YOUR COLOURS

RED

The colour red symbolizes a handful of things like love, passion and prosperity.

In Indian culture it also represents sensuality and purity, as well as, fertility. This colour is symbolic of power, strength and valour as it is associated with the goddess Durga, the mother of the universe. Brides are commonly donned in outfits and accessories in this colour to symbolise all these qualities. The colour red is also that of a chilli, a common spice in Indian culture, Hence, the red colour also symbolizes sensuousness and passion.

This colour also represents balance and power in the significant other’s life.

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GREEN In Indian culture, green signifies a new beginning, peace and happiness.

They say getting married is similar to a new birth in the lives of the couple. Thus, a lot of indian brides wear green to represent this new beginning they’re starting with their significant other. The colour green is also symbolic of fertility so many brides decorate their hands and palms with mehendi which represents the bond of matrimony represents a prosperous future for the newly weds.

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GOLD The colour gold is very similar to that of saffron and yellow, all of which share similar meanings.

Gold symbolises prosperity and wealth. Saffron is the most sacred colour in Indian culture it closely resembles the color of fire, which conveys sanctity, purity, and sacrifice.

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FLOWERS Traditional Indian weddings are vibrant and extravagant so flowers are a key ingredient to the riot of colours present.

Due to their significance, choosing the right flower for the occasion is important.

Indian wedding flowers are mostly used for decoration on the tables or bouquets.

Sometimes the flowers are used as take home gifts or even tucked in the bride’s hair in replacement of a veil. (Christensen, 2017) Wedding flowers are thought to be originated in the earliest days of marriage. Early brides would carry stinking garlands of herbs and spices for the purpose of frightening off evil spirits. In Indian culture, this tradition is still practiced in which the brother of the groom sprinkles flower petals over the couple at the end of the wedding ceremony to ward off evil.

KNOW YOUR FLOWERS

CHRYSANTHEMUMS The chrysanthemum is a symbol of life.

In the aforementioned Chinese culture, chrysanthemums come with a very wholesome meaning of a long life but they are commonly used in funerals. In Indian culture, however, chrysanthemums are commonly used in bouquets and garlands as they symbolise a long life, joy and optimism.

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HYDRANGEAS Blue, purple or green hydrangeas are commonly seen in Indian weddings.

These flowers don’t have any special significance but they are massive and vibrant so many include them as centrepieces for their weddings as it helps spruce up the arrangements. This flower’s size and colour help make the wedding look extravagant.

KNOW YOUR FLOWERS

ORCHIDS Orchids are another popular flower seen at most weddings.

Orchids are somewhat considered rare, however, they are found in an array of colours. These flowers are a common sight as they symbolise beauty, wisdom, strength and luxury. Orchids also represent a sense of deep love and unending support between the couple.

THE JAIMALA CEREMONY Within an Indian wedding there are a handful of rituals that are often practiced.

One of the first rituals to take place is the Jaimala. Jaimala is a wedding ritual in which, the bride and groom put fresh flower garlands into each other’s necks, followed by exchange of gifts.

The ceremony not only represents the the meeting of two souls, but also symbolises a union of two families; the coexistence of traditions, values and customs that make the entire wedding complete. The Jaimala is an ancient ritual that has been followed and passed down from generation to generation since the beginning of Indian weddings.

WHAT HAPPENS DURING JAIMALA Regardless of region or state, the Jaimala ceremony is one that is common throughout.

It is what gives an Indian wedding its identity.

The Jaimala ritual is the oldest tradition and one of great significance to the Indian culture and tradition. It has been and is still practiced widely.

The ceremony takes place right after worship at the arrival of groom and his friends and relatives at the venue. The groom is then greeted and welcomed by the bride’s mother post which the ceremony is held. The bride would be standing on the stage awaiting the groom. When he arrives, the bride puts a graland around his neck signifying that she has accepted him as her spouse and the same procedure is done to the bride by the groom.

This ceremony takes place in the presence of a priets and the couple’s families.

The ritual isn’t just about the action of exchanging garlands, it also represents the affection shared between the couple.

ALL ABOUT THE

KANYADAAN RITUAL Another important tradition that is practiced is the Kanyadaan ritual.

After the Jaimala ceremony, the Kanyadaan ritual takes place.

Kanyadaan, meaning “giving away the bride” in Sanskrit, is a symbolic marriage ritual for the Bride’s parents and the couple.

WHAT HAPPENS DURING THE RITUAL The Father of the Bride take’s his daughters right hand and places it in the Groom’s right hand, requesting for him to accept his daughter as his equal.

This ritual is symbolic of both the acceptance of the groom from the Bride’s Father and his official approval to give his daughter away to her partner.

After joining the two hands, the Mother of the Bride pours sacred water on to the palm of her husband’s hands, allowing it to flow through the father’s fingers onto his daughters hand and ultimately to the groom’s hand as well. Rituals are chanted during this process and the curtain between the couple is lowered once Kanyadaan has been done.

After the Kanyadaan, the groom’s sister would tie the end of his scarf, to the bride’s sari with betel nuts, copper coins, and rice.

These symbolize unity, prosperity, and happiness for the couple.

The knot represents the eternal bond that comes with marriage.

THE HISTORY BEHIND KANYADAAN This ritual has a very symbolic history behind it as it represents the union of two “Gods”.

The Bride takes a form of the goddess Lakshmi, the Hindu goddess of wealth, fortune and prosperity. The groom would take a form of Lord Vishnu, one of the principal deities in Hinduism, the Supreme Being. The parents are assisting in the union of the two ‘Gods’ while everyone bares witness. This wedding ritual is performed as an act of the parents giving their approval to the marriage before the rest of the ceremony takes place. It is said that Father of the Bride has to give away his most precious possession, his daughter, in order for her to receive great prosperity and fortune for her future.

GIVING THE BRIDE THE MANGALASUTRA The Mangalsutra is a black and gold necklace with a gold pendant which symbolizes good luck, love, and friendship.

In Sanskirt, ‘mangala’ translates to sacred and ‘sutra’ to thread. During the ceremony called Mangalya Dharanam, the groom places the Mangalsutra around her neck and applies sindoor, to the parting of her hair. These two offerings signify the Groom’s devotion to his Bride and the Bride’s new status as a married woman. This ceremony is very significant as it is when the couple expresses their devotion to each other, According to tradition, there are strong superstitions surrounding the Mangalsutra. The destruction or loss of the necklace is deemed inauspicious and hence, holds great value; not only as a symbol of the marriage between the two, but a sacred protective token from the Gods.

SINDOOR Sindoor is a traditional red coloured powder worn by married women along the parting of their hair.

It is traditionally made of turmeric, mercury and lime and it represents power. The husband is to apply the Sindoor to the parting of his wife’s hair during their wedding ceremony.

According to Hindu mythology, the wife has to wear the Sindoor every day that her husband is alive.

It is believed that Goddess Parvati, who adorns Sindoor on her own parting, not only protects the husbands of all the married women who put sindoor, but also wards off any evil.

Thus, the Sindoor is inadvertently a divine blessing for one’s husband as it wishes him a long and healthy life.

SIGNIFICANT JEWELLERY It isn’t an Indian wedding without both the bride and groom, as well as, the guests being adorned in gold jewellery.

Many pieces of wedding jewellery are laced with their own meaning and drenched in culture. Each piece whether handed down or gifted to one, holds the blessings of the giver. It carries the hopes and dreams that have been passed through the generations. (Lee, 2017) Gold jewellery has great significance in this event as it represents the presence of Gods at the wedding.

GOLD GOLD GOLD GOLD GOLD

Over centuries, gold has become the most essential and inevitable part of Indian marriages. Gold is an auspicious precious metal It is highly believed to bring wealth and prosperity along with the blessings of goddess Lakshmi to the bride, her family and also her in-laws.

SIGNIFICANT FOOD ITEMS The food at a Indian wedding varies depending on which region it’s from.

Other than the huge array of delicious food that would be served, another common sighting at Indian weddings are the sweet treats and fruits.

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1. BANANAS Hinduism has a lot of ties to the banana plant as it represents eternal life. The entire plant is considered to be sacred and the fruits are often used as offerings to the Gods. It is common that bananas are offered to Lord Vishnu and the Goddess Lakshmi for a happy and healthy married life.

2. COCONUT The coconut is referred to as God’s fruit and is seen as sacred, health-giving, pure and clean. It is often linked with human ego so in Indian culture when they break a coconut, they’re humbling themselves before God. Coconuts are seen as a symbol for prosperity and is often used as a divine offering for a blessed marriage. (Amarujala, 2018)

3. SWEETS All the ingredients in these sweets; sugar, milk, and ghee are considered to be pure and can be eaten by everyone, even spiritual leaders and vegetarians. Due to their pure state, they can be offered to the Gods thus, it is used at Indian wedidngs.

4. MANGO LASSI Indian weddings are considered to be sacred events as there are offerings to Gods and blessings involved. Thus, there is no alcohol present at the event. In place of that, a common drink

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served is mango lassi, sometimes even tea.

“DESPITE MODERNISATION, MANY MALAY WEDDINGS CONTINUE TO BE DEEPLY ROOTED IN CULTURAL TRADITIONS & CELEBRATIONS VARY DEPENDING ON ONE’S HERITAGE AND ANCESTRY.” roots.sg

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COLOURS

The most symbolic colours of malay culture come from the Malay Tricolour, which is derived from the three important values of the culture— Islam, Malay leaders and Malay culture.

However, when it comes to Malay weddings, the colours are endless as there are no specific colours that should be avoided.

Many malay weddings use pastel, vibrant and bright colours as an overall theme, like lavender, pink, gold etc.

Malays don’t believe in inauspicious colours so you can wear bright red to a more chilled, toned down black and it would still be considered acceptable. (Nurjuwita, 2018)

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RED

The colour red is a traditional colour.

It is a colour that symbolises courage, bravery, heroism and loyalty. Red roses are a common sight in traditional malay weddings.

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GREEN Green is the colour of Islam, a faith essential to Malay culture as most malays identify as muslim.

In Islam, green is associated with paradise. It is a symbol for health, life and nature. Often associated with organic beings and things as well.

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GOLD Gold is a colour often associated with royalty and is linked to Malay sultans.

Traditionally, malays wear gold to allude allegiance to their sultans. Nowadays, especially in malay weddings, gold is used as accents in wedding themes to exude a sense of lavish and it makes the wedding extravagant.

KNOW YOUR COLOURS

PINK

Pink, even though it had no symbolic meaning, is a common favourite colour used for malay weddings.

The symbolism of the colour pink is that in most cultures or cases, pink is associated with passion, kindness, giving. It is a romantic colour and inspires optimisim, as well as, warm feelings

KNOW YOUR

FLOWERS

The Malay culture has an abundance of flower symbolism that is prevalent in their cultural practices.

Due to their significance, choosing the right flower for the occasion is important.

Malay wedding flowers are mostly used for decoration on the tables and bouquets of typically red and pink flowers are often given to the bride and groom as gifts.

KNOW YOUR FLOWERS

ROSES The rose is a symbol of balance.

It also represents promise, hope and a new beginning. The use of red roses conveys the deep emotion of love for one another. Various colours of roses are commonly used in the Sireh Junjung.

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SIREH Sireh, also known as, betel leaves are prominent in malay wedding culture.

Sireh is usually used as part of the bride’s dowry and also as part of the take home gifts given to the guests of the wedding.

The traditional betel leaves being arranged accompanied by beautiful flowers, better known as the ‘Sireh Junjung’ or ‘Sireh Dara’ in Malay is the main component of the dowry.

KNOW YOUR FLOWERS

ORCHIDS Orchids are another popular flower seen at most weddings.

They symbolise love, nobility, integrity and also friendship.

They represent wealth and fortune as well. There vibrant shades of purple, pink and white give the arrangements an extra pop of colour.

BERSANDING CEREMONY The highlight of the wedding is the bersanding.

It is when the bridal couple, in their wedding outfits, sit on thrones placed on the bridal couch in the front. They are treated as king and queen for the day.

During the ceremony, friends, relatives and guests offer their blessings and well wishes, and sprinkle yellow rice and flower petals, for nobility and fertility respectively, on the bridal couple.

Upon the arrival of the groom, he presents the bridel with a Sireh Lat Lat which is a small bouquet wrapped with sireh leaves. It is believed that if the groom accidentally dropped it, it is cosidered to be bad luck.

ALL ABOUT THE TEPUNG TAWAR CEREMONY

This ritual is not as widely practiced nowadays.

However, the Tepung Tawar Ceremony signifies the blessing of the marriage by the family members, protects the bride and groom from evilness. Corn kernels,white rice, yellow rice and rose water, is sprinkled on the couple’s hands.

Some also stain the couple’s hands with henna, which is then quickly wiped away so as to not ruin the henna design that is already on the bride’s hands.

WHAT IS USED 1. EGGS Eggs symbolise fertility,

2. YELLOW RICE Yellow rice represents nobility and determintation

3. PETALS Petals represent fertility as well.

6. ROSE WATER Rose water is for a harmonious family.

5. CORN KERNELS Kernels symbolise growth and wealth.

4. WHITE RICE This symbolises fertility.

SIGNIFICANT FOOD ITEMS This may be subjective but the best part malay weddings is the food.

Along with the wide array of food, from rendang to lontong, there is also a plethora of snacks and deserts present. malay culture calls for a lot of kueh kueh, giving the wedding spread a riot of colours.

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1. KUEH There is no specific significance to kueh kueh other than the fact that it is delicious. These bite sized snacks are perfect for the wedding spread.

2. DATES Dates are known as the fruits of paradise. In Islam, both dates and date palms are considered a symbol of power, triumph, abundance and faith.

3. BANDUNG Majority of Malays identify as muslims and consuming alcohol is considered haram in Islam. Thus, there is no alcohol present at the event. In place of that, a common drink served is bandung, sometimes even tea.

EPILOGUE Hello, you’ve reached the end of A Guide To Traditional Weddings!

Now you’re probably curious, confused or maybe even taken aback by the photos chosen to accompany the information in this unorthodox guide. Well, this brings me to the purpose of my project. This entire project was about addressing the different cultures in Singapore, and yes, sexual orientation is considered a culture. These photos aim to portray how it’d be like when our ethnicity can coexist with our sexual orientation. I understand that they may come off as controversial but that further proves my point. This project aims to start a culture of acceptance one person at a time, ultimately creating a society where old and new traditions and cultures and coexist.

With that, I hope you enjoyed reading this and if I got you asking questions then my job here is done. :-)

ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS A massive massive thank you to my lecturer, for his guidance and assurance. Thank you for letting me explore as creatively as I wanted. thank you to my parents for tolerating my late nights and helping me buy stuff. Thank you to my models and my friends for sacrificing your time in this busy period to help me out. Thank you to the internet for the relevant information.