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We are starting our journey into another have them available, and we will have some year. Welcome to 2016! We would special card sign up events throughout the like to wish everyone a spring and summer. Watch Happy New Year from all for more information of us at TRMI. We ended in the magazine, up with a late fall, and a late start on the Thunder to winter, so Roads Magazine the 2016 riding of Iowa Facebook season is a short page, and on step away from thunderroadsiowa. reality. We com. have been getting out and about even in As we are staring on our 7th December on the bikes year of publishing Thunder when possible, maybe Roads Magazine of Iowa, we even more than ever before, but I am sure old would like to thank the readers and sponsors of the man winter will hit hard at some point and shut it down for magazine. We are always striving to be better, and with at least a few weeks. Until then, ride it, store it, build it, the help of readers and sponsors that has been a continual tune it, paint it, accessorize it, drool over it, and love it until process. Keep reading, keep sharing your ideas, articles, you can get it out on the roads again. photos and all things Iowa Biker related. Special thanks to the sponsors of the magazine, as they make sure this thing As we are now officially into another year, it is important keeps going month after month. About Iowa, For Iowa, for event organizers to get us the dates of your events for From Iowa is not just a tagline, but what we focus on daily 2016. If people don’t know what is going on and where it here at TRMI. Many thanks to all of you! is happening, they cannot attend your events. Email them to Vernon@thunderroadsiowa.com with event date, name of Get out and ride event, and starting location town. This will get your events on the FREE event listing in the back of the magazine and Vernon and Melanie on the website, as well as the weekly post on the TRMI Facebook page of upcoming events. If you want more than Quote of the Month: “I hope that in this year to come, you the simple FREE event listing, contact your favorite TRMI make mistakes. Because if you are making mistakes, then Staffer to purchase more space to promote your event to you are making new things, trying new things, learning, thousands and thousands of riders across Iowa. living, pushing yourself, changing yourself, changing your world. You’re doing things you’ve never done before, and With the start of a new year, we are rolling out an exciting more importantly, you’re Doing Something. So that’s new program. The Thunder Roads Magazine of Iowa Tall my wish for you, and all of us, and my wish for myself. Corn Run Ride Card Program is a ride and win deal that Make New Mistakes. Make glorious, amazing mistakes. cannot be beat. The Program is Proudly Sponsored by the Make mistakes nobody’s ever made before. Don’t freeze, folks at Leehey Olson Law P.C., IowaBikerLawyers.com. don’t stop, don’t worry that it isn’t good enough, or it isn’t Basically we will be signing up locations to be Check-In perfect, whatever it is: art, or love, or work or family or life. sites, and riders will get a FREE card with a number on it Whatever it is you’re scared of doing, Do it. Make your registered to their name. Riders go to the Check-In Spots mistakes, next year and forever.” ― Neil Gaiman from April until September and Check In no more than once per week. Each month, prizes will be drawn from Rider Check-Ins at each spot, and riders will get cool stuff just for stopping in. At the end of the year, there will be drawings for big prizes. To get your TCR Ride & Win Ride Card, certain spots across the state will be registration points, as well as we will be at swap meets and bike shows, staff will Welcome to 2016! This month we have Dory

On the Cover

Nielsen’s 2008 Fat Bob with the sexy Brittani. She had no problem getting dolled up and coming to Goozman’s Westside Bar & Grill in Harlan to do some photos. If you want to find the place, simply go to the town square, and find it on the west side of the street! Keith (aka Goozman) and Cindi have signed up to be a Check-In Spot on the Tall Corn Run, so we thought you should know where they are at! Also a heads up that they are hosting a 40th Year in Business Party at the Westside on May 7th right at the Bar. Join in the fun, and come experience a Harlan landmark that has been a biker bar for 40 years.

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CMA Notes

This was one of those “places to go, things to do” weekends, so Saturday morning found us in the Cedar Rapids area, watching with envy as bike after bike roared by on the highways. Everyone was bundled up like they were running the Iditarod, but they were RIDING! December in Iowa, with the temperature about 50 degrees around noon, a slight breeze from the south, and full sun. What an unexpected beauty of a day! Unfortunately, we were in the car instead of on the bikes. Even though I was pretty sure there was no opportunity for a ride in my near future, I still found myself running down a mental list of things that would have to be done before we could ride: Did Mark get the pad put back on my seat after he installed the back rest? Since he had been so busy during bow season, had he even grabbed a moment to plug the bikes into the trickle charger? Knowing how we’d been caught off guard by the beautiful day I only hoped the riders that were out had at least taken the time to check the air pressure in their tires before taking off – not exactly a full “T-CLOCK” check, but better than nothing.

done. Then, the religious leaders came along and added more stuff to the lists till the people were absolutely overwhelmed with rules. So it’s not surprising that Mark 12:28 records this question being asked of Jesus: “Of all the commandments, which is the most important?” It’s obvious that Jesus was fully aware that none of us quite get our dirty socks to the hamper because here’s how he distills books full of commandments down to something we can all remember: “The most important commandment is this: . .’You must love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul, all your mind, and all your strength.’ The second is equally important: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ No other commandment is greater than these.” Of course, the Bible does give more detail on how those play out in daily life such as when Jesus tells how to show your love for God: “If you love me, keep my commandments.” And how to show love for your neighbor: “Do to others whatever you would like them to do to you.” So for a bit of self-inspection, just remember that all the big things of life are divided into these two categories: “Love God” and “Love your neighbor”. If what you’re thinking or doing doesn’t fit under one of these headings, there’s going to be a problem. Get with God to make it right and you’ll avoid some major wrecks in life. Blessings to you – Karla

Mark and Karla Cornick are Area Reps with the Christian Most of us have heard about the major points on the Motorcyclists Association. Find out more about CMA and T-CLOCK checklist (Tires, Controls, Lights, Oil, Chassis, God’s plan for you at www.cmausa.org . Kickstand) that we’re supposed to inspect on our bikes before we ride. But have you ever wondered about where that came from? It started out with a group of guys who had seen some unbelievable bike wrecks caused by issues that would have been avoidable if they had been discovered prior to the ride. They decided that if the bikers knew the most important areas to inspect, it would cut back on accidents, so they made a list on a whiteboard of the top accident causes so the bikers could memorize them : “low air pressure, worn tread, object embedded in tire tread, broken hose, throttle sticking, loose cables” etc. Then one of their wives came in and saw the list. “We can’t even get you guys to remember to throw your dirty socks in the hamper, so what makes you think anyone will remember this?” The guys waited till the trouble-maker left before reluctantly admitting she was right. Then, one of them noticed that the first 3 items fell under Tire issues; then next 3 items under Controls issues; and so on. That prompted the reorganization of the list into categories under the easy-to-remember acronym T-CLOCK. Or at least, that’s how I heard the whole T-CLOCK thing came about. Believe it or not, we were in the same information-overload position spiritually speaking until Jesus came along. Because the Lord God cared about the well-being of his people, he had provided lists of what SHOULD be done, what should NOT be done, and what should be done if you had already done the thing that should NOT be 6 - TRMI JANUARY 2016

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The Biker Friendly Business Directory is a list of establishments throughout Iowa that sponsor the magazine. You can pick up your copy here every month. Let them know that you saw them in TRMI. If your business would like to advertise in Thunder Roads Iowa Biker Friendly Business Listing and become a part of the network, please email vernon@thunderroadsiowa. com

Brenny’s Motorcycle Clinic 4426 State Street Bettendorf, IA 52722 (563)359-7222 www.BRENNYS.com

Okoboji Harley-Davidson 1005 Eastview Avenue Okoboji IA, 51355 712-332-7700 www.erniesharley.com

Carroll Cycle Center 1327 Plaza Dr Carroll, Iowa 712-792-1610 www.carrollcycle.com

R/J Performance HWY 63 North Ottumwa, Iowa 52501 641.684.8400 www.rjperformance.com

Ernie’s Harley-Davidson 2613 Hwy 18 East Algona, IA 50511 515-295-7951 www.erniesharley.com

Uptown Motors Sales, Inc 310 Cleveland St Muscatine, IA 52761 563-263-2944 www.uptownmotorsales.com

CoolBikerStuff.com 1606 P Avenue Milford, Iowa 51351 877-816-2200 Follow us on Facebook!!

Fenders Cycle and Motorsport 1109 E Army Post Road Des Moines, Iowa 50315 515-256-9062 www.fenderscycle.com

Werner Cycle Works 14410 Frontier Road Exit 440 I-80 Omaha, NE 68138 402-894-3050 www.wernercycleworks.com

Crispy’s Biker Apparel Cedar Rapids, Iowa Find Us On Facebook 319-241-0916

Fenders Honda 100 South 16th Street Ames, Iowa 50010 info@fendershonda.com 515-233-4727

Whipp Sales and Service, Inc 701 S 8th Street Clarinda, Iowa 51632 1.800.477.0195 www.whippsalesandserv.com

Metro Harley-Davidson 2415 Westdale Drive SW Cedar Rapids, Iowa 52404 319-362-9496 www.metro-motorsports.com

Wiebler’s Harley-Davidson 5320 Corporate Park Drive Davenport, IA 52807 563-355-6437 www.wieblers.com

Dealers

McGrath Dubuque Harley-Davidson 145 N Crescent Rdg Dubuque, IA 52003 563-557-3735 www.dubuqueharley-davidson.com

Zylstra Harley-Davidson 1930 E 13th Street Ames, Iowa 50010 515-232-6223 zylstrahd.com

Baxter Cycle 311 4th Street Marne, Iowa 51552 712-781-2351 www.baxtercycle.com

Nishna Valley Cycle HONDA – YAMAHA – KTM Atlantic, Iowa 50022 1-888-577-6406 www.nishnavalleycycle.com

Biker Accessories

Churches Rebels In His Hands 600 16th Avenue Council Bluffs, Iowa Mark and Lora Schiller Pastors 712-329-9901

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Entertainment Book Em Dano’s 33 S Main Street Denison, Iowa 51442 712-263-9818Mon-Sat 4-2 Dancers Nightly 5-1:30 Celebrations DJ & Karaoke Services Newton, IA 641-521-8036 Any Occasion /Rally or Event EmCee Facebook/Ray Johansen(Celebrations) Specializing in Weddings & Receptions National Motorcycle Museum 102 Chamber Drive Anamosa, Iowa 52205 319-462-3925 Nationalmcmuseum.org Okoboji Classic Cars Museum and Restoration Shop 810 Jeppeson Road West Okoboji, Iowa 51351 712-332-802

Food and Drink Amigo’s 280 North 1st Street Fort Dodge, Iowa 50501 515-576-0142 Amigosfortdodge.com Barney’s 203 S Mill Street Wadena, Iowa 52169 563-774-2525 Barney’s Wadena on Facebook Baxa’s Sutliff Store & Tavern 5546 130th Street NE Lisbon 319-624-2204 Cold Beer, Delicious Food, Good Music & Great Times!

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Beach Pub Along Highway 22, Buffalo,IA Open Daily 10am-2am Join Us Weekly For HomeCooked Sunday Breakfast

Goozman’s Westside Bar & Grill Harlan, Iowa 712-755-2259 Goozman’s Westside on Facebook

Pearl Street Social Club 110 Pearl Street SW Shellsburg, Iowa 52332 319-436-7100 Find Us On Facebook!

Bikerz 313 Main Ave. ClearLake, IA 50428 641-440-4255 Noon-2am 7 days a week

Haverhill Social Club 202 1st Street Haverhill, Iowa 50120 641-475-3321 Mon-Sat 10-2, Sun 12-12

Pines Steakhouse Oinkers Lounge & Grill 1500 E 7th Street Atlantic, Iowa 50022 712-243-3606 M-F 11AM-, S-S 4PM-

Bootleggers of Millville Hawkeye Bar & Grill Awesome Stop, Great Staff, Fantastic Food 110 North 4th Street Tops in Scenic River Rides Mapleton, IA 51034 Check us on Facebook 712-882-1226 563-252-7775 Mon-Sat 10:30 a.m. ~ Sun 12:00 p.m. Buck Snort 113 4th Street Neola, Iowa 51559 712-485-9090 The Buck Snort on Facebook C&L Sandbar 103 North Noyes Street Mondamin, IA 51557 712-646-2300 or 712-216-0975 Hours Daily 11-close Catfish Charlie’s On the Mississippi River 1630 E. 16th Street Dubuque, IA 52001 (563)582-8600 www.CatfishCharliesDubuque.com Cindi Mae’s 101 Main Street Earling, Iowa 51530 712-747-6262 Cindi Mae’s on Facebook

Iron Saddle Saloon 39 S Main Street Dayton, Iowa 50530 515-547-3311 J.R. Willie’s Gateway to the Beautiful Hill Country Colesburg, IA 563-856-5095 Open Daily Mon-Sun 11AM Home of the Willie Whopper Just 1 More 515-570-4206 403 3rd Ave Under the Water Tower Jamaica, Iowa Knickers Saloon 2186 Central Avenue Dubuque, Iowa 52001 563-557-0887 365 Days a Year Knickers Saloon on Facebook

Pizza Ranch DENISON 510 HWY 39 North Denison, Iowa 712-393-3333 Check Us Out on Facebook Open 7 Days a Week Pizza Ranch HARLAN 613 Court Street Harlan, Iowa 51537 712-755-2262 Check Us Out on Facebook Open 7 Days a Week Red Oak Tap 419 E. Reed Red Oak, Iowa 51566 712-623-4788 Riverside Tavern 450 E Main St Lehigh, Iowa 50557 515-359-9998 Email:riversidetap@gmail.com Sambetti’s Bar and Grill 1430 2nd Avenue Des Moines, Iowa 50314 515-245-9780 Mon-Sat 11a-2a, Sun 11a-7p

Knuckleheads Cruisers Lounge Anamosa, IA 319-462-2724 411 Main Griswold Like on FB Knuckleheads Pub & 712-778-4111 Grub Screaming Eagle American Bar & Grill Mon-Thurs 3PM-Midnight Open M-F 11-2, S-S 10-2 228 East 4th Street Fri-Sat 3PM-2AM Sunday 11AMThe Knucklehead Burger “Git IT IN YA” Waterloo, Iowa 50703 Midnight 319-235-8865 Lampe’s Pub www.partyattheeagle.com Desperados 608 Iowa Avenue 105 E 5th Street Atlantic Dunlap, Iowa 51529 Scooters on Broadway 712-243-7087 712-643-5781 475 NE Broadway Home of Cold Beer, Open 7 days a week at 11 AM Des Moines, Iowa Good Times, Pizza & Wings 515-288-1053 Midway Tavern scootersonbroadway@hotmail.com Dolly’s Bar & Grill 206 1st Street 109 N. Pine Street Soldier, Iowa Shenanigans Pub-Dubuque Auburn, Iowa 51433 712-884-2230 3203 Jackson Street 712-688-2220 www.midwaytavernsoldier.com Dubuque, Iowa Come for the Food, Stay for the Scenery 563-513-4001 Minden Bowl Café & Lounge Open 364 - 3 pm - 2 am Durango Depot 209 Broadway Street 736 Burtons Furnace Road Minden, Iowa 51553 Sidetracked Open 3 to close 712-483-2937 206 West Union Street Best Scenic Road With the Best Food! Minden Bowl on Facebook Creston, Iowa 50801 563-552-2291 641-782-8534 Montgomery Street Pub Fro’s Pub ‘N Grub 207 East Montgomery Street Slaby’s Bar & Grill 309 Cedar St, Wilton Creston, Iowa 50801 Plainview, Iowa 563-732-3977 641-782-2165 563-843-3443 Fro’s Pub n Grub on Facebook Home of the Famous A Surprise Around Every Corner Papa Joe’s Jumbo Grilled Pork Tenderloin 117 South 6th Street Missouri Valley, Iowa 51555 712-642-9015

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Sparetime Bar & Grill 136 West Main Street Ute, Iowa 61060 712-885-2226 Sportsman Bar & Grill 103 1st Street Pisgah, Iowa 51564 712-456-2222 FOOD, FUEL, FUN Stumpy’s Bar & Grill 423 Main Street Duncombe, Iowa 50532 515-543-4222 Stumpy’s Bar & Grill on Facebook Suds –N- Jugs Bar & Grill 807 Iowa Avenue Onawa, Iowa 51040 712-433-4880 Nightly Food Specials The Back Forty 317 Main St. Macedonia, Iowa 51549 712-486-2687 facebook.com/thebackforty The Edge 3157 Joliet Avenue Missouri Valley, Iowa 51555 712-642-2229 The Edge on Facebook The Home Plate Diner 304 E. 30th Street Des Moines, Iowa 50317 515-262-7000 The Lounge 1005 Chatburn Ave Harlan, Iowa 51537 712-755-5050 The Lounge Harlan Iowa on Facebook The Roadhouse 105 Washington Marne, Iowa 51552 712-781-2272 Home of the Marne Burger The Sawmill Bar & Grill Now with a Full Menu 401 Main St New Market, IA 51646-3079 712-585-3601 Thirsty’s on 3rd 2202 W 3rd, Davenport (563)424-1123 Follow Us on Facebook Daily Thirst Quenching Deals Timerz Pub & Eatery 324 E 7th Street Logan, Iowa 51546 Timerz Pub & Eatery on FB Food & Fun Available 7 Days/Week T.J.’s Pourhouse 100 E. Washington Street Exira, Iowa 50076 712-268-2353 Open M-SAT.@11, SUN.@ NOON

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Tobey Jacks Mineola Steak House Mineola, Iowa 712-526-2078 Open 7 Days a Week Check Us Out on Facebook Uncle Harley’s Bar & Grill 202 W Mayne, Blue Grass (563)381-1717 Great Pizza & Food Bikers ALWAYS Welcome Vic’s Main Tap 304 Broadway Audubon, Iowa 50025 712-563-2122 Opens M-F 3, Sat 10, Sun 3 Vista Pub 7205 Vista Drive West Des Moines, Iowa 515-528-2186 Vista Pub on Facebook Whitetails Bar & Grill 101 N. Main St. Marble Rock IA,50653 641-397-9900 Mon.- Sat. 7am breakfast -2am Close www.whitetailsbarandgrill.com

I ns ura n ce Matt McCall Insurance Agency State Farm Insurance 102 East South St, Tipton 563-886-6120 www.mattmccall.net AMK Insurance Agency Motorcycle, Home, AUTO, Commercial, Life, Health Shane Baker 712-310-7475 Srbaker@walnutel.net

Hupy and Abraham sc, pc Lawyers for Bikers 800.800.5678 Hupy.com IowaBikerLawyers.com Leehey Olson Law, PC Riding & Defending Your Rights for Over 30 Years 877-209-9452

Photo and Art

Woody’s Roadside Tavern 100 West Jefferson Albion, Iowa 50005 (641) 488-2220 Woody’s Roadside Tavern on Facebook

Ullrich Photography PO Box 1842 Clinton, Iowa 52733 563-243-8715 www.natanic.com

Guns and Ammo

Services

2A Firearms Training Training to Protect Your 2nd Ammendment Rights 641-439-6660 Craig.2aft@gmail.com

A+ Affordable Heat, Air, Refrigeration & Geo Thermal 22274 Old Lincoln Hwy Crescent, Iowa 51526 712-329-9901

McCunn Specialty Firearms 74980 Richland Road Massena, Iowa 50853 www.mccunnguns.com 712-779-GUNS

BCS Computers 100 Industrial Road Guthrie Center, Iowa 50115 641-747-3344 www.brubakercomputer.com

Sandbothe Firestone 1106 Main Street Griswold, Iowa 51535 712-778-2223 Sandbothe Firestone on Facebook

Nelson Machine & Forge General Machining, Ornamental Iron, Weld/Fab 70 Washington Street Marne, Iowa 51552 712-781-2220

Southwest Iowa Sandblasting Mike Magers 65162 Oxford Rd Atlantic, Iowa 50022 712-249-3995

Shops & Fabricators Bent Wrench Cycles 911 7th Street Harlan, Iowa 51537 712-235-2453 Bent Wrench Cycles on Facebook Butterfield’s M.C. Parts 8025 Blondo Street Omaha, NE 68134 402-391-3768 Chuck’s Cycle Service and Repair S&S and Drag Specialties Dealer 714 East 7th Street Washington, Iowa52353 319-461-5278 Creative Concepts Collision 422 Market Street Harlan, Iowa 51537 712.755.2231 Cutthroat Cycles 221 Broadway, Polk City 563-265-4687 or 515-290-1393 Roadside Repair- CALL ME F#$K Yeah ‘Merica Dead Heads Engineering, Fab, Repairs & Sales 426 Railway Street Gillett Grove, Iowa 51341 deadheadsmceng@gmail.com 712-835-3353

CJ Now Plumbing Sewer & Water Specialists 309-786-2002 Serving the Quad Cities Area On Call 24-7

Shooter’s Outlet 114 Main Street Arcadia, Iowa 51430 712-689-2772 Tues,Wed,Fri 9-5, Thurs 9-7, Sat 8-12 www.shootersoutlet.net

Hoker Trucking NOW HIRING Dixon, Iowa Hokertucking.com 563-843-2763

SR Gunsmithing AGI Certified Gunsmith Scott Rule Council Bluffs, IA 402-850-5787 scottrule@q.com

Irwin Locker & Catering 502 Ann Street Irwin, Iowa 51446 712-782-3215 irwinlocker@gmail.com

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Motorcycle Medic 3176 Highway 30 Woodbine, Iowa 51579 712-647-2818 Open Tues-Sat Noon-6PM

Legal

Wilson’s Tap and Recreation 1008 Story Street Boone, Iowa 50036/ 515-433-1395

Locked and Loaded Outfitters 612 Market Street Harlan, Iowa 51537 712-235-4867 www.LockedandLoadedOutfitters.com

Peebles Plumbing & Heating Luxaire & Mitsu 613 Main Street Griswold, Iowa 51535 712-778-2417

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Pike Run Services 320 Main Nichols, Iowa 52766 Shop 319-723-4244 Cell 319-330-4541 SS Collision, CycleWorks & Graphics 2902 11th Ave SW Spencer, Iowa 51301 712-262-3959 www.sscollision.com Steffens Cycle Shop LLC 1311 E 7th Street Atlantic, Iowa 50022 712-243-3076M-F 9-5 Most Sat 9-12 Or Call Waderich’s Towing 420 S Main Street Denison, Iowa 51442 Phone 712-263-3687 Cell 712-263-9685

TATTOO Skin Mechanix INKorpar8ted 117 No. 16th Street Council Bluffs, Iowa 51501 712 256-2847 Check Us Out on Facebook

To buy ad space for your business or service in our directory, give us call at 712-249-5630 or email vernon@ thunderroadsiowa.com

F & J Racing 701 N 3rd Ave Marshalltown, Iowa 50158 641-752-8651 www.fandjracing.com HetzStudio.com (563)263-2803 Muscatine, IA Full Custom Paint, Pinstriping & Airbrush Main Street Bikes and Trikes 522 Main Street Granville, Iowa 51022 712.727.3515 www.shopmsbt.com

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99 Counties to tour on the bike, 99 counties to tour, take one down, drive on around, 32 counties to tour on the bike. A few years back, a summer riding goal was to ride through each one of the counties of Iowa, and what was found was a wealth of interest and beauty. Each month we will revisit each county as a featured article. We will tell you about new things to see, places to ride, and give you a little spark of touring curiosity for our state of Iowa. MONROE COUNTY Monroe County is located centrally in southern Iowa and 2 major highways run through the county. Highway 5 runs north and south and highway 34 is a major southern Iowa highway running west and east. There is a total population to of 7,970 people o in its 434 square miles, and the m county has c only 0.6 miles o attributed to a water. Albia w is the county sseat of Monroe County, and was C named for the n 5th President of 5 the United States, James Monroe. Besides the county seat, cities include Eddyville, Lovilia, Melrose, and Buxton. The county’s population temporarily increased during the boom in coal mining during the 1920’s to almost 26,000.

an absolute MUST see is the Welcome Home Soldier Monument. It is located on Highway 34 West near the city limits. It consists of 21 White Marble Crosses, 224 feet of Black Granite, with 1600 names engraved and honored. This was special as my pictures were taken December 7th on Pearl Harbor Remembrance Day. Albia is also home to 1 of only 2 major mining disasters in Iowa history… on February 14, 1893 a massive mine explosion occurred here after a “shot” (gunpowder charge used to bring down the coal) ignited creating a dust explosion. Eddyville is located northeast of Albia on Highway 137 (a beautiful scenic ride if you are on a motorcycle). An interesting fact about Eddyville is that the town was actually founded before Iowa had officially become a state. Eddyville has a large employer in the Iowa Biotech Center. This includes the Cargill Corn Milling Plant, Ajinomoto (a Japanese company), HeartlandLysine, and Wacher-Chemi (a German company). The town lies along the Des Moines River and suffered from life threatening floods during the 1940’s. There are several small businesses on Main Street. Grab a piece of Amish Crème pie at the Eddyville Market & Deli, you won’t be disappointed, it is excellent! There are a couple of additional establishments to visit if your hunger is accompanied by a thirst for some suds. The West side of town is now protected by a levee where you can sit and watch the river flow by or watch for eagles as they fly along the river.

Let’s start our tour with the county seat of Albia. Albia is the home to Kness Manufacturing (the world’s finest mouse trap), L & S Tools and Hawkeye Molding, and Superior Machine. One of the newer businesses is Relco Locomotives. They recondition old locomotives from all over the United States top to bottom. Albia also has a beautiful downtown square and boasts 92 buildings on the National Register of Historic places. Check out some of the special shops on the town square. For a cold drink you can stop in at Murph’s Sports Bar on the west side of the square, or at Poor Richard’s on the east side of the square. While in Albia, www.thunderroadsiowa.com 14 - TRMI JANUARY 2016

If driving into Monroe County from the North on Highway 5 you will pass through Lovilia. On the north end of town is the North End Tap owned by current owner Joanne for 34 years. On the South Thunder Roads Magazine of Iowa on Facebook


en of town (Highway-S) end is Lisa & Huckleberry’s South End Tap, where ice cold drinks and delicious food specials abound. If riding your motorcycle throughout M Monroe County or maybe you’re out hunting down that prize b buck, you have a c couple choices to ssatisfy your cravings. D Did I mention that th the world’s record b buck in the U.S. was h harvested by Tony L Lovstuen in Monroe C County?

a and, it slowly became a g ghost town. Today all that rremains of the historical town are a few parts of to ssome old buildings and th their foundations, and a ssmall sign telling about B Buxton, Iowa. L Like many Iowa counties, Monroe County has many unique places, things to do, and people to meet. If making a trip to Monroe County, you can contact the Albia Chamber of Commerce (641932-5108) for information on yearly, monthly activities. Next month is Montgomery County, home of the mighty Red Oak, see us there for some more southern Iowa points of interest.

T The West side of Monroe County has the small town of Melrose known as Iowa’s “Little Ireland”. This small town had the smallest school basketball team to win a state championship in 1937. The school’s enrollment was only 66 students. Their season was 33-0. In 2012 3 players and the coach were inducted into the Iowa High School Athletic Association Hall of Fame. If you get to Melrose be sure to check out Feehan’s Pub. Feehan’s serves up good food and the usual cold drinks if you find yourself travelling towards Rathbun Lake (off Highway – 34) in Melrose.

Bob Colbert thomasrcolbert@yahoo.com Sources available upon request

That just about sums up Monroe County as far as happening places to visit, except we are forgetting one pretty cool chunk of Monroe County history… The ghost town of Buxton. Buxton’s residents were comprised of Swedes and Australians to some extent, but the majority of Buxton’s population was made up of Black Americans from the south that had come to Iowa to work in the mines. Why is this of importance? Well, the men who moved to Iowa to work in the mine both inhabited AND independently governed the town of Buxton. This process alone made Buxton somewhat of an anomaly, as in 1914 it was the largest town in United States history to be populated and governed solely by black residents. Unfortunately, in 1916 the demand for coal decreased and the residents began to leave

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Eryka Driscoll 2005 Softail Deluxe Tipton

Marti Fleming 2015 Softail Slim Washington

Linda Bonham 2015 Goldwing Council Bluffs 16 - TRMI JANUARY 2016

We want you on our pages! If you are an Iowa Girl of Thunder, send us a quality image, your name, year and model of bike, and where you are from to: vernon@thunderroadsiowa.com

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History of Motorcycles an Explosion of Possibilities By the time America reached the decade of the World Wide Web we had seen the rise of Hip-Hop and the thawing of the Cold War. We would also have the misfortune of witnessing firsthand an increase in terroristic acts in our nation, with the World Trade Center and Oklahoma City bombings… not that I’m an expert on the subject, but maybe if our Fearless leader at the time would have been a tad more focused on his job duties and a little less enamored with a young intern named Lewinsky things could have evolved a little differently. Anyway, cigars and mass murderers aside, the motorcycle continued to forge ahead. As I mentioned before, during the 1990’s we saw the motorcycle industry turn its focus towards improving upon the two-wheeled beauties that we had grown to love so much. And these improvements helped to further entrench the motorcycle and the lifestyle surrounding it into mainstream America. The Japanese manufacturers were able to grow by leaps and bounds during the 90’s due in part to the growing interest in the racing scene. Honda continued to enchant riders both in search of technologically advanced bikes, as well as riders who just HAD to go fast.

on the bikes innovation. 1996 was a stellar year for the company when they released the original Star model, sporting a 1300 cc engine it was named the V-4 Royal Star. In the final 2 years of the decade Yamaha graced the American public with the YZ400F (It became the first mass produced 4 stroke motocross bike, and was to become the eventual downfall of the two-stroke 250’s.), the YZF-R1, and the YZF-R6. Motocross style bikes were becoming more main-stream by the minute at this point in history.

Suzuki was not to be outdone by its Japanese competitors, and also produced progenies faster than Octomom. 1990 brought us the 779 cc DRBIG which amounted to In 1990 Honda released the VFR750R (aka RC30) in the largest single cylinder America. This was a genuine race bike for the street, and sold at a staggering price that was twice the cost of a stock engine in living memory. Followed by the GSX-R750 Interceptor. In 1992, 200 units of the legendary NR were produced for sale in the U.S. This was a totally street legal in ’91 which switched from oil cooling to water cooling version of the ill-fated NR500 Grand Prix Racer, which and packed on a few pounds. 1995 was a better year for sold for a whopping $60,000. No, that’s not a typo….it the company, when the beloved Bandit 1200…a 16 valve was seriously 60 grand…at that’s 90’s bread, not today’s 1156 cc oil/water cooled model appeared on the motorcycle low-carb version of the dollar. The NR was loaded, and scene. But Suzuki didn’t stop there, in 1996 they released way beyond its time. It featured carbon fiber body work, the all new a digital dash, under GSX-R750 which seat exhaust, and fuel was coined the injection. In spite “turning point of its sumptuous use model” thanks of carbon and light to its twin – spar alloy, it weighed in frame instead of at nearly 500 pounds. the older double 1993 was another cradle frame. lucrative year for The engine was Honda with the release also redesigned of the CBR900RR and featured 3 (Fireblade). This piece crank cases, model combined the chrome plated cylinders, and a side-mount cam chain, as power of an open class motorcycle with the weight and well as the Suzuki Ram Air Direct (SRAD) system. The handling of a 600, and proceeded to stun the sport bike company’s first sport bike with a V-twin engine came in the world. Finally, Honda introduced the radical EXP-2 in 1995. This bike was a two-stroke 400 cc model that became form of the TL1000S in 1997, followed by the legendary “proof-of-concept” for company that a cleaner burning and SV650 “Hayabusa” in 1999. The Hayabusa sported an aluminum frame and a liquid cooled 90 degree V-twin more powerful two-stroke engine was attainable. DOHC 4 valve engine. Suzuki called this bike the “ultimate aerodynamic sport bike”…and they were right, as it soon Yamaha didn’t slow down during the 90’s either. 1991 became the favorite of land speed racers. brought about the release of the FJ1200A, it came standard with anti-lock brakes, and it set the standard for So it’s pretty clear that the Japanese were hard at work sports-touring bikes during the decade. In 1993, Yamaha during the 90’s, but what were our local boys up to at the introduced us to the striking GTS100…this machine featured electronic fuel injection and hub centered steering, time? While I have to admit, there was plenty to focus on at the time....Y2K was creeping in on us, and the Spice Girls but consumers scoffed about the price and failed to bite Thunder Roads Magazine of Iowa on Facebook www.thunderroadsiowa.com 18 - TRMI JANUARY 2016


were incessantly asking everyone to tell them “what you really really want”, but despite the staggering amount of diversions, Harley-Davidson managed to focus on the tasks at hand and had themselves one hell of a decade as well. To kick off the ‘90’s Harley introduced us to the FLSTF Fat Boy….as we all know; this bike almost instantly became a modern legend of motorcycle design. 1991 brought us the “Dyna” line of bikes, starting with the FXDB Dyna Glide Sturgis. It wasn’t until 1994 that Harley-Davidson would enter the world of Super bike racing, but it did so elegantly with the release of the VR1000 and its powerful dual overhead cam and liquid cooled engine. The same year brought us the classically styled FLHR Road King to the growing family of touring bikes Harley already had to offer. 1995 was yet another year for firsts in the H-D family, with the addition of the Ultra Classic Electra Glide. This bike would become the first in Harley history to be a production bike with sequential port electronic fuel injection. The next three years HarleyDavidson would spend expanding its ever evolving corporation by opening

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new factories in Milwaukee, Menomonee Falls, Kansas City, and even Mahaus, Brazil…which just happened to be the first operations to ever take place outside of the U.S. for the Harley-Davidson Motor Company. Harley rounded out the decade by sprucing up the “Dyna” and “Touring” motorcycle families by upgrading them to include the new twin cam 88 engines. Seems pretty cut and dry…except for a long lost friend in the industry…or maybe that’s long lost foe, seems to be attempting a bit of a comeback towards the close of the era. 1998 brings about the revival of brand exclusive production for a former competitor in the American motorcycle market. A merger of 9 companies ultimately formed the Indian Motorcycle Company of America (IMCA), and they opened a production facility in Gilroy, California starting with production of Scout, Chief, and Spirit models powered by engines acquired from S & S Cycle Inc. So where does this leave us now? Well to be honest it leaves me pretty exhausted. Between crossing my fingers that my student loans were going to disappear in a worldwide computer crash and wondering why anyone would voluntarily put a cigar…never mind, I digress. The ‘90’s brought us a lot of bigger, faster, and more loved twowheeled beauties than one could have imagined possible. Next time we will conclude the series on motorcycle history by looking at today, tomorrow, and just how far we have come since Roper’s crazy bicycle. Melanie Schwarte Melanie@thunderroadsiowa.com

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Happy New Year from all of us at TRMI! To kick off our year we have Dory Nielsen’s 2008 Fat Bob that Goozman let us take inside his 40 year running biker bar in Harlan. Brittani was gracious enough to model with the bike and show off her gorgeous smile. Goozman’s Westside is one of the Check-In spots for the 2016 Tall Corn Run Ride Card Program sponsored by IowaBikerLawyers.com


January could be my favorite month on the entire calendar. First off it brings much needed closure to all the family fun filled holiday drama. Secondly there will be no more surprise attacks of a holiday jingle penetrating and looping through my brain. Lastly and most importantly January kicks off the 2016 riding season and if it brings weather like last month, the season will be in high gear sooner than expected. With the unexpected riding days that popped up last month, I was easily distracted from my winter brain rebuilding plans. For the virgin TRMI readers, last month I vowed to rebuild my brain instead of the bike during the off season. I am burning through winter storage by getting educated so that I blacken the correct oval on Election Day. My progress is not moving nearly as fast as I can swing my leg over the scooter when the temperature hits 50 degrees this time of the year, but I have managed to successfully read 15 pieces of literature that was personally delivered to me by mail. I have watched 5 commercials on television and I watched the first 5 minutes of the presidential debate before narcolepsy saved me from another evening of pure boredom.

must have some high priced hookers in Washington because someone is getting screwed. Then there is the never ending topic of healthcare. Obama care, repeal it, build on it, throw it out and start all over again, whatever! I guarantee the first candidate with a plan for Veterans to get free healthcare coverage that is equivalent to the Presidential package will be getting my vote. There is one candidate bragging about finally bringing Social Security to an end, don’t get excited the plan doesn’t include reimbursement for any of the hard earned money that we have been forced to pay into the program. While another candidate preaches about Social Security cut backs because senior citizens are apparently living high on the hog with their $13,000 a year payouts. Blacken that oval if your retirement plans are to stay busy pinching pennies because there won’t be any money for riding.

And let’s not forget to put careful consideration into which candidate is going to protect our 2nd Amendment rights, the right to keep and bear arms. Now for a little history lesson, years ago a bunch of I have learned that many of the candidates are spouting politicians decided booze was a problem in the USA so off about climate change, building walls to keep out they passed the 18th Amendment which “prohibits the immigrants and improving education. In my sick mind manufacture and sale of alcohol in the United States”. climate change means a longer riding season so I’m Years later a new generation of politicians wanted to all for that. As for building walls, it doesn’t make sense go out partying so they wrote up the 21st Amendment that walls can keep criminals in but no one can figure which repealed the 18th so now everyone can legally out how to keep terrorists out. As for education, my enjoy alcohol again. How long do you think it will be vote is going to the first candidate that starts bragging before Prohibition repeats itself taking aim at the 2nd about improving motorcycle safety by educating stupid Amendment? Be warned there are several candidates cage drivers. with gun yielding body guards by their side as they spout off a number of theories about imposing gun Many of the candidates are trying to get our votes control and how they believe gun manufactures should based upon their beliefs of union labor, welfare and be held legally responsible for mass shootings. Piss entitlement programs. When I decide which oval to on that! I’m saving my vote for the candidate that blacken, I am awarding someone an annual salary thinks cell phone companies should be financially of $400,000 along with a $50,000 expense account, responsible for motorcycle accidents. a $100,000 tax free travel account, and $19,000 for entertainment expenses every year that they live rent Make your vote count. free in the big house. Upon retirement they are entitled to reimbursement for office rental, a lifetime pension, Shifty LaRue free healthcare and travel expenses until death do us part! The first candidate that offers to rethink that welfare and entitlement program is guaranteed to get my vote. Seriously 19K a year for entertainment, they

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a product better suited to neuter a rider. Look at how sharp the edges are in the relief cuts. It’s got harsher teeth than a hole saw, and it’s made of thicker metal too. And it’s firmly threaded into a steel tank, meaning there is virtually no chance it will yield to flesh and bone. I have no idea who designed this, who’s selling it, or who already has one on So the other day, their bike. It’s nothing I was opening personal; really, I’m my garage door. just trying to keep some (My garage riders safe, and with all door opener shot of their parts attached. craps so I’ve been pulling it As I have said before open with the in this column, just release handle because you can bolt lately). I ran a it on (or in this case, piece of nylon rope through a piece of pipe, and that has been screw it in), doesn’t my method of opening the door until I ponied up the bucks make it right. There are, to my knowledge, no product safety for a new opener. But the rope broke; right when I had my rules governing the motorcycle aftermarket industry’ and we heels dug in and was going for the maximum effort to get the don’t want any either. The last thing we need is a congress that door started. Down I went, as hard as I’ve ever fallen in my can’t get out of a paper bag with a blow torch telling us what life. Lucky for me, my motorcycle jack and my motorcycle we can and can’t buy for our bikes. We vote with our wallet broke my fall. That was supposed to be funny, and I guess until and we self-police our industry. Let’s keep it that way. If you you’ve fallen on a motorcycle and hoist you might not see the see a stupid product, don’t buy it. If you tell others, then it will humor in it. It’s entirely possible that even after such a fall you stay on the shelf where it belongs. If you see somebody with might not. But back to the fall, when I came to, I yelled for something dangerous on their bike, it’s a free country, but feel help and had to have my daughter come help me back up off free to tell him why you think he should be behind you and not the floor. I learned I don’t bounce like I used to, bruised ribs ahead. Have a safe off season, and remember whatever you and tailbone. A day later other body parts chimed in; sprained choose to put on your bike affects you and everyone around wrist I get, but left ear, never sprained one of those before. you, so make smart choices.

Just Don’tPart II

This event got me to thinking, because I’d actually bent the Mark Mullins, MAG President. passenger foot-peg mount on my chopper I fell on it so hard. I was thinking about all the stuff people bolt, weld and rivet on to bikes. I’ve seen Ninja throwing stars zip tied to fork legs, army bayonets, big old Rambo knives, brutally sharp pike nuts and all kinds of weapons of mass destruction stuck here, there and everywhere on bikes. And I realized, I was really glad I didn’t have the kind of bullet-sharp foot pegs I’d seen on other bikes, because that would have stuck in me like a Medieval sword. So I came to this conclusion about that stuff. It’s not just about the time you’re on the bike you have to live with that decision 24/7, and the bike too; as do the people riding with you. I’m not sure I want to be behind you when that WWII bayonet drops off your swing arm for example. It’s also about the time it’s sitting in the garage too, apparently. Which never occurred to me until that rope broke and I saw my motorcycle in a new light- roommate. Don’t have a roommate that can hurt you. It’s not limited to home-brewed stuff either. As an example, I included a photo of the “Crown” gas cap that’s making the scene these days. Take a close look at that thing and ask yourself if you’d slide down the stair rail if it was bolted at the end of the banister? If the answer is no, then why would you put it on your gas tank? In fact, I don’t actually care of you’re a lady rider or a man, your favorite body parts are going to have to get past that thing on your way over the handlebars in an accident. What might have been a moderate collision could end up leaving you with no happy parts at all, and that’s not funny. To put it mildly, that’s the dumbest motorcycle product I’ve ever seen. I can only assume that a personal injury lawsuit is imminent, because it’s only a matter of time until somebody gets emasculated by that gas cap. I’m not sure I could design 28 - TRMI JANUARY 2016

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Cutthroat Cycles Grand Opening What do you get when you put 2 gnarly looking biker dudes and 1 hot looking lady together? You get the custom shop Cutthroat Cycles. Jim & Titus met at Harley Davidson Technician School in Arizona. From day one, they became true biker brothers, and knew that they were bound to produce some wickedly creative machines together! Two and a half years later they found themselves looking for a new market area. They chose Iowa and initially a location in Davenport. After 5 months in a building that seemed to become increasingly smaller, and an increasing demand for their work, they relocated to Polk City. This is where Murph and I come into the picture. We arrived in Polk City with the sun shining brightly, and the yummy smell of grilled dogs and burgers wafting through the air. Approaching the building, that was previously a gas station, we saw 2 gnarly guys and a gal that looked as though she had walked straight off a modeling job. We introduced ourselves and Jim, Titus, and Lisa proceeded to go all out to make us comfortable. The tables with hot food and cold drinks seemed to empty just as fast as the staff could fill them. Good people, good food, and some pretty good looking bikes that were for sale out front! Some of the city council showed up to help cut a ribbon for their grand opening, and I couldn’t help but be just a little awed! These three had garnered the support of the administration of a small town. During the party a guy pulled up to ask if he could get a tire that had picked up a big, fat screw fixed. Jim and Titus jumped up and proceeded to fix his tire. Despite the fact that they weren’t officially opened yet, they didn’t hesitate. Now that’s customer service at its finest. Stop by Cutthroat Cycles for all your motorcycle needs! Murph and Annette

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“The first time I saw Ed he was 15 years old flying down a gravel road on his Penton. 15 minutes later I saw him pushing that bike back up the same gravel road because the accelerator got stuck and he had to pull the spark plug wire to get it to stop.” Words from the memories long entrenched in the mind of the wife of this month’s featured military rider, Ed Berry. Ed now resides in Ankeny with his wife Jo and their children, but that has not always been the case. Ed’s time in the military had him travelling on far more than just rural gravel roads. Ed served in the U.S. Navy from 1985 to 1993 as a Second Class Petty Officer. His dad was in the Coast Guard, and so it only seemed fitting that Ed would take to the water as well to serve his country. Ed spent his years with the Navy primarily serving as a Machinist Mate, stationed on the East Coast. While in the Navy he also went on numerous deployments, taking him to the Middle East, Africa, and Europe. In addition he has travelled through the Suez and Panama Canals, as well as Cuba and several of the U.S. Virgin Islands where he found some time for snorkeling.

Maco in his dad’s basement…Harleys, Hondas, Bultacos, Kawasakis, Suzukis, Indians, and the famed Penton that won him the heart of his spunky wife, but his newest two-wheeled cohort is a 2007 Street Glide that he bought at Big Barn in Des Moines. Ed chose the Street Glide because it had everything he was looking for in a bike. The Shovelhead still has a home with Ed and Jo, but is now able to “get some work done”, just like any other “maturing” woman would appreciate. Ed takes advantage of any opportunity to get out and ride; even winter in Iowa is fair game if the roads are clear. When the weather is nice, you’d be hard pressed to find him on more than two wheels. He is an ABATE member, and has many friends that join him in his love of two-wheels. Ed and Jo plan to attend The Freedom Rally in Algona, the BACA camp out, the Dough 4 Joe Rally in Fergus Falls, Minnesota, and of course the place where we first met the man called Ed…the Bedford Rally.

While taking a break from snapping pictures in Bedford, Ed sat down across from me at a picnic table. Now, Ed appeared to be a man of few words at first glance, maybe Ed has always been a biker even a little annoyed with at heart. He built his first all the noise and drunken bike at the impressive age of 13. The bike was a Maco shenanigans occurring when he had clearly just rolled in 500 that he assembled from boxes full of parts in his dad’s after who knows how long on the road. The look on his basement, and his love of riding hasn’t wavered since. Ed face was clearly intended to encourage people to leave him found himself competing in some time trial competitions the hell alone, but unbeknownst to Ed, it was just the type in high school, and even got a first place trophy after of look I found inviting. I proceeded to talk…and talk… competing with a flat tire. A FLAT TIRE?? What the hell, and talk to the poor guy, and before you knew it we were Ed? I knew you had a screw or two loose! Now obviously shooting the shit, and Vernon and I had found a new friend. there were times Ed was unable to have a bike at his side… Ed was the coolest guy we met the whole time at the rally. not much room to carry one along on deployment, let alone Over time we would grow to know not only Ed, but his wife find enough spare time to warrant keeping one in port. But Jo, their 2 daughters, and their grandsons. This is truly an true to his biker heart, Ed always returned to his love of two amazing family, tight knit, and giving. Ed spent a great wheels. portion of his life giving to each and every one of us by serving our country, ensuring that we have a place to call As with many bikers, Ed’s return to bikes came in the form home, a place to experience our freedoms. of a great deal that he just couldn’t pass up. That great deal was a Shovelhead…a 1980 FLT to be exact. Despite Ed, we thank you for your service in the Navy and for your Jo insisting that Ed was “too young” to own a Harley, the friendship! lovely lady earned a new home in the Berry household. Now, Ed has ridden many bikes since the days of the Melanie Schwarte 30 - TRMI JANUARY 2016

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Station can be found sitting in the northeast corner.

LD’s Filling Station 616 12th St. NE Mason City, IA 50401 (641) 494-2313 Open 7 days a week @ 5 a.m. - Serving Breakfast and dinner all day.

Fulfilling their longtime dream of opening a breakfast shop, Harold and Phyllis Edgar opened for business in 2001. It wasn’t long before they decided that the coffee shop wasn’t all that they were looking for and the neighborhood restaurant and bar were added. Harold and Phyllis wanted their place to be family oriented and decided to incorporate the names of their children, Lori and Danielle, thus creating the name LD’s. Since the whole family has a penchant for old cars and the “good ol’ days”, the Filling Station part just seemed to be a natural fit. LD’s Filling Station is situated in the northeast corner of town, kind of tucked back out of the way. It doesn’t have a huge fancy sign or a flashy exterior that will grab your attention as you drive down the road, but once you know it’s there, you’ll not want to miss stopping by for some great food and friendly service. Highway 65 is the north/south main thoroughfare in Mason City. There is a stoplight at the 12th Street North intersection where you’ll want to turn east. Follow 12th St. NE around the lazy S-curve, down the hill past the abandoned railroad underpass, and across the bridge over the Winnebago River. On the north side (left side) of the road you’ll find a large parking lot and LD’s Filling

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Stepping inside the front door, you’re immediately aware that you’re in “Car Guy” territory as there is a huge racing slick on the floor and the header panel of a Lincoln mounted to the wall. The rest of the place is adorned with hub caps, license plates, name badges, pictures, vintage car ads, gas station signage, gas pumps, etc. Booths line the walls and tables fill the room. Listen for the peanut shells crunching on the classic hardwood floor as you make your way to the barrel for your own basket full to munch on while you peruse the menu. Speaking of the menu... every single item on the menu, breakfast or dinner, is named after a vehicle of some sort. The MG Midget will get you a juicy hamburger and fries, while the Thunderbird (my personal favorite) is a tender chicken breast sandwich with marinara sauce for dipping and an order of fries. There are so many different options to choose from you’ll have a hard time deciding whether you should order your favorite classic car and try something new or if you should order something you know you want even though you never really liked that particular car. There are weekday specials which are either menu items at a special price or a special such as a hot beef sandwich or taco night. Saturday and Sunday mornings feature a breakfast buffet until 1 p.m. The biscuits and gravy really hits the spot! One very special thing you’ll find on the walls of LD’s is the evidence of their continuing support of many great causes. Benefit dinners, charity donations, and an undying devotion to the Make-A-Wish Foundation. Harold Edgar was an avid supporter of Make-AWish, every year striving to make the Annual Wish Ride bigger and better. His favorite part about working with MakeA-Wish was interacting with the family who benefited from Make-A-Wish, especially meeting the children that made the wish. His love for the event carried him through, despite his own terminal cancer. That love continues with his family and friends as they plan for the 2016 Wish Ride that will be held in July. Sitting in for Big Little, David and Heather McCoy Until next month, ride safe and eat hearty! Craig Little craig@thunderroadsiowa.com PS If you have someplace you think we should check out in your neck of the woods, shoot me an email.

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A farmer goes out and buys a new, young rooster. As soon as he brings him home, the young rooster rushes and screws all 150 of the farmers hens. The farmer is impressed. At lunchtime, the young rooster again screws all 150 hens. The farmer is not just impressed anymore, he is worried. Next morning, not only is the rooster screwing the hens but he is screwing the turkeys, ducks even the cow. Later farmer looks out into the barnyard and finds the rooster stretched out, limp as a rag, his eyes closed, dead and vultures circling ng ng overhead. The farmer runs out, looks down att the young roosters limp body and says: “You deserved it, you horny bastard!” And the young rooster opens one eye, points up at the vultures with his wing, and says, Shhhh!,they are about to land.” A man took his pregnant wife to the hospital. The doctor looked her over and told them it would be a rather difficult delivery. He offered to let the couple try an experimental procedure. The woman would be connected to a machine that would transfer part of the pain to the father of the baby, thus reducing her own. The man quickly agreed. The doctor warned him, though, that there was a slight bug in the machine that caused it to amplify the pain sent to the father by ten times, and if the pain became too much for to bear would he please let the doctor know. The doctor turned on the machine and watched the man. The man said he felt absolutely fine and he could take more. The doctor turned the dial up to 40, 60, 80, and finally 100% of the pain, times ten. The woman delivered the baby painlessly and the doctor stared at the man, astonished at how he could not even flinch with that much pain brought upon him. The couple took the new baby home. There, on the front step, the mailman lay dead.

A woman wom ma walks into her accountant’s office and m tells telllllss him that she needs to file her taxes. The accountant a says, “Before we begin, I’ll need to ask a few questions.” He gets her name, address, social security number, etc. and then asks, “What is your occupation?” The woman replies, “I’m a whore.” The accountant balks and says, “No, no, no. That will never work. That is much too crass. Let’s try to rephrase that.” The woman, “Ok, I’m a prostitute.” “No, that is sstill too crude. Try again.” They both think ffor a minute, then the woman states, “I’m a cch chicken farmer.” The accountant asks, “What ddoes chicken farming have to do with being a whore or a prostitute?” “Well, I raised over 5,000 cocks last year.” A guy walks into a sperm donor bank wearing a ski mask and holding a gun. He goes up to the nurse and demands her to open the sperm bank vault. She says, “But sir, its just a sperm bank!” “I don’t care, open it now!” he replies. So she opens the door to the vault and inside are all the sperm samples. The guy says, “Take one of those sperm samples and drink it!” she looks at him, “BUT, they are sperm samples?” “DO IT!” So the nurse sucks it back. “That one there, drink that one as well,” so the nurse drinks that one as well. Finally after 4 samples the man takes off his ski mask and says, “See honey its not that hard.”

A man decides to take the opportunity while his wife is away to paint the toilet seat. The wife comes home sooner than expected, sits, and gets the seat stuck to her rear. She is understandably distraught about this and asks her husband to drive her to the doctor. She puts on a large overcoat so as to cover the stuck seat, and they go. When they get to the doctor’s, the man lifts his wife’s coat to show their predicament. The man asks, “Doctor, have you ever A lady walks into a fancy jewelry store. She browses around, seen anything like this before?” “Well, yes,” the doctor spots a beautiful diamond bracelet and walks over to inspect replies, “but not framed like that.” it. As she bends over to look more closely she inadvertently breaks wind. Very embarrassed, she looks around nervously to see if anyone has noticed her little accident and prays that A man suffered a serious heart attack while shopping in a sales person doesn’t pop up right now. As she turns around, a store. The store clerk called 911 when they saw him her worst nightmare materializes in the form of a salesman collapse to the floor. The paramedics rushed the man to the standing right behind her. Cool as a cucumber and displaying nearest hospital where he had emergency open heart bypass complete professionalism, the salesman greets the lady surgery. He awakened from the surgery to find himself in with, “Good day, Madam How may we help you today?” the care of nuns at the Catholic Hospital. A nun was seated Very uncomfortably, but hoping that the salesman may not next to his bed holding a clipboard loaded with several have been there at the time of her little “accident!” she asks, forms, and a pen. She asked him how he was going to pay “Sir, what is the price of this lovely bracelet?” He answers, for his treatment. “Do you have health insurance?” she “Madam, if you farted just looking at it, you’re going to shit asked. He replied in a raspy voice, “No health insurance.” when I tell you the price.” The nun asked, “Do you have money in the bank?” He replied, “No money in the bank.” Do you have a relative who could help you with the payments?” asked the irritated A woman posts an ad in the newspaper that looks like this... nun. He said, “I only have a spinster sister, and she is a Looking for man with these qualifications: - won’t beat me nun.” The nun became agitated and announced loudly, up - won’t run away from - is great in bed. She got lots of “Nuns are not spinsters! Nuns are married to God.” The phone calls replying to her ad but met someone perfect at patient replied, “Perfect. Send the bill to my brother-inher door one day. The man she met said, “Hi, I’m Bob. I law.” have no arms so I won’t beat you up and no legs so I won’t run away.” So the lady says, “What makes you think you are great in bed?” Bob replies, “I rang the doorbell didn’t I?” 34 - TRMI JANUARY 2016

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As Iowans we have the “first in the nation” responsibility that comes with being first. Folks in many other states will never have the same opportunity to meet with and learn about the candidates. I like to think that Iowa has earned this status. Over the years Iowans have put in the time and vetted the candidates, we’ve heard what they had to say and overall we’ve done a pretty good job.

Caucus The Iowa Caucus is scheduled for Monday, February 1 2016. Voters from all of the 1,774 Iowa precincts meet to elect delegates to the county conventions. County convention (one for each of the 99 counties) delegates are elected to the state party convention. Eventually, the state party delegates elect representatives to attend the national party conventions where a presidential nominee is selected. The winners of the Iowa Caucuses will be the candidate who has the most delegates elected to the county convention which then leads to the state convention and so on.

Elections have outcomes and results have consequences. I’ve seen the government become an over-bloated and massive intrusion into my life. Chances are that the next president will be appointing several Supreme Court justices. Think about how long they last; appointed for life. Better make sure we know a little bit about the person we give that much power to, at least this time. Think of it as investing one evening to help make your kids and grandkids lives better. Find your precinct caucus and attend it. Bring your opinions to the town square and discuss it. Sounds like something the founding fathers would consider to be a duty of citizenship. Questions or Comments? peter@riderpromotions.com

Caucuses do not work like a primary. At a caucus voters discuss the candidates, then make their choice. The Iowa Caucuses are an example of grassroots democracy. It requires the candidate to be more involved than simply soliciting a vote. They need to convince folks to speak on their behalf. Voters who are not registered with one party or the other can register at the door, so participants need not be registered voters ahead of time.

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Jan 9 Retro Rewind Dubuque Jan 22-24 Rod and Custom Motorcycle and Car Show Rock Island, IL Jan 23 Brenny’s Customer Appreciation Party Davenport Jan 23 31st Annual Southern Iowa Swap Meet Ottumwa Jan 23 ABATE D3 Van Cruise Davenport Jan 30-31 Colorado Motorcycle Expo Denver, CO Jan 31 Parts Girl Promotions Swap Meet Rock Island IL Jan 31 36th Annual Wild Wades Swap Meet Des Moines Feb 5-7 IMS MINNEAPOLIS MOTORCYCLE SHOW Feb 11 ABATE of Iowa Lobby Day Des Moines Feb 13 ABATE D3 Ton-O-Slush Donahue Feb 12-14 IMS CHICAGO MOTORCYCLE SHOW Feb 19-21 30th Annual Lincoln Bike Show Lincoln, NE Feb 26-27 Omaha Chapter AMCA National Swap Meet Fremont NE Feb 27-28 47th O’Reilly Rod & Custom Bike/Car Show Monticello Mar 4-6 World of Wheel Chicago Mar 6 Parts Girl Promotions Swap Meet Cedar Rapids Mar 18-20 World of Wheels Omaha Mar 19 ABATE D3 Two Wheel Trauma Genesis Heart Inst Davenport Mar 19-20 36th Annual Motorcycle Expo Sioux Falls Apr 2-3 29th Annual Donnie Smith Bike Show St Paul, MN Apr 9-10 North Iowa Motorcycle Expo Mason City Apr 16 Rumble In The Sand Outlaw Drags Conesville Apr 23 ABATE D3 Blessing of the Bikes & Run Davenport Apr 29-30 Vintage Torque Fest Dubuque Apr 30 Sleeping Angels Fun Run Boone May 7 Goozman’s Westside 40th Anniversary Party Harlan May 21 ABATE D3 Ride for Awareness Bettendorf May 26-29 Redneck Revival Conesville

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Jun 4 Jun 11

2nd Suicide Awareness Benefit/Ride&Drive Waterloo 8th Annual Bell Tower Festival Poker Run & Cycle Show Jefferson Jun 17-18 Rumble In The Sand Outlaw Drags Conesville Jun 24-25 Conesville Two Rivers Music Festival Conesville Jun 30-Jul 2 ABATE of Iowa Freedom Rally Algona Jul 1 Buffalo Days Ride In Bike Show Buffalo Jul 9 ABATE D3 Taco Run for Children’s Therapy Center Wiebler’s HD Davenport Jul 29-31 Central Iowa Hawg Rally Norwalk Aug 4-6 9th Annual Across the Border Raid Bedford Aug 13 ABATE D3 Too Broke to Go to Sturgis Rodeo Donahue Aug 14 ABATE D3 Too Broke to Go to Sturgis Mex Memorial Fun Run Donahue Aug 26-28 Spydermania III Atlantic/Council Bluffs Aug 27 Jami Jam V: Ride For Mental Health Action & Awareness Terrill Sep 1-3 45th Davenport Fall International Meet Sep 1-4 Redneck Revival Conesville Sep 10 4th Annual Ride for U of IA Children’s Hospital Davenport Sep 16-17 Rumble In The Sand Outlaw Drags Conesville Sep 17 The Hunt of a Lifetime Buffalo Sep 17 ABATE D3 Leaf Run Davenport Oct 2 ABATE D3 32nd Annual Toy Run w/USMC Reserves Davenport Oct 15 Tall Corn Run End of Year Prize Drawing Okoboji HD Oct 15 Rumble In The Sand Outlaw Drags Conesville Oct 15 ABATE D3 Harvest Run Davenport Nov 11-12 ABATE of Iowa STEAM Marshalltown

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Thunder Roads Magazine of Iowa January 2016  

Iowa's Biker Magazine. About Iowa, For Iowa, From Iowa

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