Moxie Magazine - March 2022

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| FROM THE PUBLISHER |

March is finally here and as most of us begin dreaming of spring, it feels like this spring is going to give us a much-anticipated return to normal (well, as normal as possible) life. This edition of Moxie Magazine is packed full of content to help you enjoy this marvelous March. The food content in this edition is AMAZING! We crack open the Moxie recipe box and share some of our favorite St. Patrick’s Day recipes. Our very own Elizabeth Precopio visits the newest dining sensation in downtown Plainwell, Dog & the Bank. To round the food section out, the Kalamazoo Foodie, Rachel Kirtley takes us on a culinary adventure to Kalamazoo’s Brick & Brine.

In addition to all of the great food content this month, we are also happy to feature all of the great content you have come to expect from Moxie. While we will miss seeing you all the first weekend of March, we are very excited to announce that our 12TH ANNUAL WOMEN’S LIFESTYLE EXPO will return to the Kalamazoo County Expo Center in just a few months on Friday, May 6 and Saturday, May 7. I can’t wait to see you there! Lots of love,

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contents

MAINTENANCE CHECKLIST 16HOME

LIFE 8 Marlita Walker Reviews: They Called Us Girls

10 Nutrition & Your Mental Health 12 Pest Pros: Can Squirrels Be Pests?

16 Home Maintenance Checklist 18 Strategies for Professionalism . 18 Eight Dates 22 One Woman’s Opinion: Can Our

AN OUR 22 CCHILDREN FIX THIS?

Children Fix This?

FOOD . .

6 Dog & the Bank 14 Brick & Brine 24 St. Patrick’s Day Recipes

24ST.DAYPATRICK’S RECIPES

PUBLISHER: Heather Dombos hdombos@moxiemediagroup.net LAYOUT & DESIGN: Alicia Pauwels apauwels@moxiemediagroup.net

& 14BRICK BRINE

THE PEOPLE WHO MAKE IT HAPPEN

CONTRIBUTING WRITERS: Kim Carson Ashley Carter Youngblood Kelly Duggan Rachel Kirtley Heidi McCrary Elizabeth Precopio Hannah Reuter Marlita Walker

BY EMAIL: info@moxiemediagroup.net editor@moxiemediagroup.net sales@moxiemediagroup.net

WEBSITE: moxiemediagroup.com FOR SALES INFO: 269-870-7321

BY MAIL: Moxie Media Group, LLC P. O. Box 2284 Portage, MI 49081-2284

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|

RESTAURANT REVIEW

|

200 E Bridge Street, Plainwell, MI • (269) 225-1033 TUES – THURS: 11am–9pm • FRI: 11am-10pm • SAT: 10am-10pm • SUN: 10am-8pm In the fall of 2021, a new restaurant, DOG & THE BANK, opened in downtown Plainwell, and I have been dying to get there ever since. Luckily for me, some friends wanted to meet for brunch, and when one of them suggested Dog & the Bank, I jumped at the chance. The interior of Dog & the Bank is adorable. Even though everything has been remodeled, and all of the furnishings are new, it still suits the original building and looks like it has always occupied that space. The eclectic atmosphere focuses on the large, beautiful bar, but since it was a sunny day and it seemed like a fun experience, we opted to reserve one of Dog & the Bank’s outdoor igloos. We were led to the heated Igloo, which was decorated with lights and had such a warm and cozy atmosphere. Brunch is available on the weekends, which meant a menu with a variety of breakfast and lunch options.

The flavors were delicious together. It was an elevated egg benedict. I was delighted with my choice and finished my whole plate.

We started with an order of their DOUBLE CUT SHOESTRING FRIES to share for the table, along with mimosas and bloody marys. The fries were delicious! They were crispy and warm with just enough salt and a little parsley.

Our service was incredible. We had a great server who checked on us regularly. The igloos are reserved for an hour and a half a time, so he was kind in reminding us how much time we had left towards the end of our meal and offered one last refill on our drinks before we left.

One of my friends went with the SWEETWATER DONUT BREAKFAST SANDWICH, which came with sausage, American cheese, and an egg served in a cut glazed donut. She opted for the DUCK FAT FINGERLING POTATOES for her side. She was hesitant to order this because it was a little different from a traditional breakfast sandwich, but I encouraged her to try it for

March 2022

My other friend went with their MONTE CRISTO. It had smoked ham and smoked turkey served on challah bread which is then fried, dusted with powdered sugar, and served with some raspberry preserves. Need I say more? It had been a while since she had a Monte Cristo but mentioned that it was the best one she had ever had. Lastly, I went with the CRAB BENEDICT because my weakness on any brunch menu is any sort of egg benedict. My plate came with two English muffins, each with a crab cake, poached egg, baby spinach, Romanesco, and Hollandaise. On the very top was a slight drizzle of sauce that had a little heat.

My BLOODY MARY was honestly the best one I’ve had in a long time. Don’t sleep on their cocktails! They know what they are doing behind the bar.

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that very reason, and she was happy she did! She loved her sandwich! The yolk broke open at her first bite, and she was hooked. The mix of salty and sweet won her over for sure.

I would absolutely return to Dog & the Bank again. The food is very well done both in taste and presentation. The atmosphere is relaxed yet trendy, and the service was excellent! What a great addition to Downtown Plainwell. E.B. Precopio Elizabeth is a hairstylist by day and 24/7 food enthusiast. She visits restaurants in the Kalamazoo area and blogs about her experience at feedmekzoo.com

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|

BOOK REVIEW |

Marlita Walker Reviews

THEY CALLED US GIRLS By Kathleen C. Stone

“ At the end of World War II, more American women worked outside the home than ever before. Yet the culture, from politicians to corporations to television shows, portrayed the ideal woman as a housewife. Many women happily assumed that role, but a small segment bucked the tide–women who wanted to use their talents differently, especially in jobs that had always been reserved for men.” CYNREN PRESS After my most recent night of binge-watching interesting films of my choice, I was captivated with “On the Basis of Sex,” a fascinating look at the early years of Ruth Bader Ginsberg. She was driven to pursue a “man’s career” as an attorney at Harvard in 1955, where she did, in fact, encounter a very male-dominated hostile environment with only eight females in her class of 500. Ginsberg personally faced gender equality setbacks in countless job searches, which motivated her to eventually argue six landmark cases on gender equality before the Supreme Court for the ACLU. Having just finished “They Called Us Girls,” I was struck by the resemblances in Ginsberg’s life to the seven remarkable women that Stone featured in her book: all born before 1935, all chose professional careers, all attended respected universities in America, all faced discrimination - sometimes due to gender, sometimes due to race. The author was interested in discovering why some women willingly took on the opposition in their attainment of a career that was not worth the agony of pursuit for many others. She questions, “ How did they find the ambition, confidence, sense of self – whatever it was – to have a professional career when the culture said not to, and most of their contemporaries

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agreed? To find out, I would need to talk to women themselves.” And so, she did. A Lithuanian-Jewish freespirited artist named Dahlov Ipcar who lived on a Maine farm and created heartwarming children’s books. She was asked to host her first exhibition at the Portland Museum of Art when she was 84. A Trinidadian physician named Muriel Petioni refused to let the color line defeat her even though hospitals were segregated when she began her internship in 1937. A violinplaying Eastern European physicist named Mildred Dresselhaus was invited to the White House multiple times, meeting presidential families from the Roosevelts to the Obamas. Born in the Dominican Republic, Frieda Garcia fought to have her dual US citizenship reinstated (for voting in a Dominican election on a family trip back to the island); and then chased her dream to become a non-profit leader and activist here. German-born Rya Zobel finished law school only to discover that she could not land a job with a law firm. “Law firms were not hiring girls,” she said. “And we were not women. We were ‘girls.’ ” Zobel became a federal judge! These inspiring stories reminded me of my homemaker mother, who was born in 1923. She had none of the similarities that Stone

discovered among her seven characters, but I believe the author omitted one: Grit. My mother’s grit propelled her into the Navy Waves in 1943 when the program was just beginning, playing on the first Wave softball team at Cecil Field, FL. For 70 years, she believed that she had not contributed much to the war effort because she served stateside. However, at the age of 90, while conversing with young military women at the World War II exhibit in Washington DC, she was repeatedly thanked for her historic contribution to servicewomen... because she “paved the way” for their careers. Kudos to the women who have gone before us and paved the way! March is Women’s History Month, and Stone’s book is an excellent reading choice to strengthen our understanding of how the past can significantly impact the future for our daughters and granddaughters. Marlita Walker Marlita is a native Michigander, who returned back to the area after 18 years spent in IL and PA. When she is not on cruising adventures with her hubby in their vintage Roadtrek camper van; she relaxes by re-arranging her home decor, walking with friends, and connecting with her 10 grands who live in TN and CA. Read more book reviews at litaslines.blogspot.com.

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Nutrition & Your Mental Health INTRODUCING AMINO ACIDS BY ASHLEY CARTER YOUNGBLOOD

FOOD IS NO LONGER ENOUGH

Due to the depletion of The Earth’s soil health, sources like The American Society for Horticultural Science and the Journal of American College of Nutrition report a reduction in the percentage of nutrition in our food by a median of 5-40%. Even the Journal of the American Medical Association determined in 2002 that diet alone can no longer supply adequate amounts of nutrition. This change in nutrient density means that someone would have to eat eight oranges to equal the same amount of vitamins that our grandparents would have gotten from just one orange. And, to consume that amount of fruit as “one serving” would cause another whole set of problems with caloric excess during our current obesity epidemic. As a country, we may be overfed. But, we (including our brains!) remain undernourished. This means that, separate from any trendy “diet” that touts itself as the “perfect” way of eating, even if we ate the “perfect human diet” (whatever that is!) every day, we simply cannot get as many nutrients to the brain that are needed to prevent mental health symptoms. So, while food is no longer enough, there is a straightforward and powerful option to help provide your brain with the nutrition it needs to be happy and stable: amino acids!

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Introducing

AMINO ACIDS Amino acids are commonly known as “the building blocks of life” as we need them to survive and for our bodies to function well. Where do these magic molecules come from? Dietary protein. (Which reminds me: are you SURE you are getting enough protein? Without regular and substantial protein, our bodies cannot make enough amino acids to keep our brains well despite our other efforts toward our well-being!) Where can you find these lovely little helpers? Over the counter! The best part of this powerful intervention is that it is not rocket science. You do not even need a doctor to prescribe them for you (although you should always consult with your healthcare provider before any lifestyle change as there are some contraindications for certain amino acids related to certain health conditions or symptoms). There is even a general blend by Genesa called “Total Amino Solution” that is recommended by the leaders who are using this intervention successfully in mental health and addiction treatment, such as Julia Ross, the author of The Mood Cure and The Craving Cure, and Dr. Joan Matthews Larson, the author of Seven Weeks to Sobriety: The Proven Program to Fight Alcoholism through Nutrition.

WHAT THEY CAN DO

While you can get amino acid support for your mental health through even things like protein powder, therapeutic doses are needed to affect significant changes in mental health. And while a general amino acids solution like the above can be supportive, the ideal way to use amino acids to address mental health symptoms is to use “targeted” treatment. This means that you work with a practitioner well-versed in amino acid therapy to explore your symptoms and how you can use amino acids within five categories of brain health to improve stability.

AMINO ACIDS CATEGORIES SEROTONIN – When this

chemical in the brain is affected, Depression is the result. To address this chemical imbalance, the amino acids of 5-HTP and L-Tryptophan can be used to offer a more positive outlook, improved confidence, a greater sense of humor, and emotional flexibility. Melatonin (although not an amino acid but related to the above two amino acids) can also be used in this category to assist with sleep issues.

LOW BLOOD SUGAR – When we do not eat often

enough or eat the wrong foods that are spiking our blood glucose (and, therefore, insulin) too high or too frequently, hypoglycemia’s crash in blood sugar is the result. With this comes irritability, confusion, and even physical symptoms of shakiness, dizziness, and nausea. The amino acid L-Glutamine can help provide our brain with the fuel it needs to get through challenging moments until we can get appropriate nutrition to the organ (i.e., the brain) responsible for our mental health. Because of its natural blood sugar-stabilizing effects, this amino acid can also be used to eliminate cravings for things like sweets/sugar or even substances like alcohol.

ENDORPHINS – Low endorphins cause us to

have trouble receiving pleasure and joy from things. Low endorphins can also correlate to those dealing with chronic pain. Luckily, two amino acids - DL-Phenylalanine (DLPA) and D-Phenylalanine (DPA) - can help those looking to regain emotional pleasure & pain relief.

GABA (GAMMA-AMINOBUTYRIC ACID) – GABA is

both an amino acid and a neurotransmitter. Its central function is to help manage anxiety and stress by promoting calmness and relaxation. L-Theanine, another amino acid in this category, can also be used for the same purposes if GABA

itself is not quite right for the person. Think of them as nature’s “natural Xanax.”

CATECHOLAMINES – When our brain is low on Catecholamines, our body looks for that next “hit” of energy, whether it is sugar, coffee, or chocolate. For this issue, we can use L-Tyrosine and L-Phenylalanine to offer a natural boost of energy, alertness, and focus that can combat even the most stubborn issues with focus,v especially in the morning.

NEXT STEPS

As with anything, the arrangement of amino acid therapy for mental health-related to dosing, timing, and frequency is unique to each individual. And, be smart about it: take this educational information and talk with your provider to see how such supplementation could be just the holistic solution you have been looking for related to your mental health. Just know that hope is out there. Change is possible. For a lot of people, medication may not be necessary… IF you give the brain the fuel it needs. After all, mental health symptoms are not due to an antidepressant deficiency or because you are not taking enough anti-anxiety medication. They are an imbalance in the brain that can be helped by replacing those same brain chemicals in a therapeutic & targeted way! Ashley Carter Youngblood LMSW, LMFT, CMHIMP Ashley is the owner and psychotherapist at her growing practice located in Kalamazoo, Inner Peace Counseling, PLC. She and her colleagues offer telehealth services to those in Kalamazoo & other parts of MI. More info at www.kalamazoo-counseling.com.

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|

PEST PROS |

CAN SQUIRRELS REALLY BE PESTS? BY JOSH BOONE OF PEST PROS

You probably had one of two thoughts when you read the title. Either you thought, “but squirrels are just cute little critters who live outside. How could they bother anyone?” or you thought, “Ugh, don’t remind me…” Anyone who first thought has never had a squirrel try to make a nest in their home. All the traits that make squirrels delightful to watch when they’re outside--their pep, their industriousness, their relentlessness-- often make them a nightmare when they’re inside. Here are problems squirrels can cause when they’re allowed to get inside your home and how to prevent them. Reading this probably won’t make you stop loving the little guys, but you might look at them a little differently.

THEY SNEAK IN

As you’ve no doubt observed countless times, squirrels are expert acrobats. Climbing sheer surfaces, shimmying across beams and cables, even fearlessly leaping amazing distances-they do it all. Unfortunately, these gymnastic inclinations serve them all too well when they’re BREAKING AND ENTERING. Squirrels seeking food, water, shelter, or warmth often see houses as excellent opportunities. If they can find the tiniest opening up high (and occasionally down low), they’ll use their unmatched dexterity to reach it. Usually, squirrels enter your home through damaged vent screens, uncapped chimneys, natural building junctions, peeling shingles, siding discrepancies, or occasionally just make their own hole. They can also leap from nearby power lines, tree branches, or high plant life. If the opening they find isn’t big enough, they’ll make it big enough--damaging your home in the process.

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The hole your robber squirrel makes getting in could even become a passage for all kinds of other pests, too. If the squirrel has pests like fleas, other pests might follow it in fast. Then, the squirrel will have made their problem YOUR problem--which really isn’t fair.

THEY BUILD NESTS INSIDE HOUSES

Ok, so you can see why squirrels might be annoying while they’re trying to get into your home. But are they that big a deal once they get inside? This is the part where people who have had squirrel problems before stare into the distance and shake their heads solemnly. When many pests get inside your home, they’re too small to do much damage fast. Not squirrels. When squirrels build winter nests, they’re relentless. They’ll grab chunks of whatever they can grab, smashing, munching, and crashing through everything else in the process. Squirrels often slash up insulation, paper products, linens, fabrics, and even structures to scavenge nest materials. Their nests grow while often the rest of your attic gets ripped to shreds. The damage squirrels inflict on attics can lead to all kinds of other problems too. Damaged insulation can lead to drafts, mold, severe heat and cooling loss, and even safety concerns. They’re turning your nest.. into their nest!

THEY GNAW ON ELECTRICAL CABLES:

Squirrels are rodents, and just like many other rodents, their teeth never stop growing. To keep their growing teeth healthy and sharp, they’re gnawing on something all day, EVERY day. The problem is, if they get into your home, they may end up gnawing on something they really shouldn’t bite, like wires or cables. Soft, plastic-

wrapped electrical wires are an ideal squirrel teething target. They’re brightly colored, nice, soft, and easily accessible. If squirrels chew on electrical wires enough, however, they--and you--are in for a nasty surprise. Squirrels can easily chew on wires until they break through the wrapping and expose the wiring. Depending on where the wire is, it is always possible to spark and start hazardous and damaging electrical fires. Even if the wire doesn’t spark, squirrels could cause other disruptive or annoying electrical damage. And all because they can’t stop munching.. it’s an addiction.

THEY CAN INFLICT STRUCTURAL DAMAGE

The damage they can inflict on a property isn’t purely cosmetic, either. If you store anything in your attic--boxes of old photos, scrapbooks, etc.--it could end up nesting material for your unwelcome house guest. Forget about old clothes or other fabric products--there’s no way soft targets like those could escape their attention. Drafts and holes in insulation created by burrowing squirrels could drive up your heating bill and much more. In rare circumstances, these pests could even damage the structural integrity of part of the building itself! Everybody likes squirrels. They’re cute, they’re funny, and they’re always up to something rascally. When that “something rascally” has to do with inconveniencing you in your own home, however, they’ve gotta go. Anytime you need some help with a rowdy rodential resident in your home, give us a call. We can safely and effectively remove your squirrel and ensure they can’t get in again.

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|

THE KALAMAZOO FOODIE |

100 WEST MICHIGAN AVENUE, KALAMAZOO, MI | 269. 343.4444 Tuesday – Thursday 4 PM – 10 PM Friday – Saturday 4 PM – 11 PM

Downtown Kalamazoo has transformed so much in the last two years. We have lost some favorite local restaurants, but we have gained quite a few new restaurants, and some have gone under some major construction. Two of our favorite restaurants decided to join forces into an existing space, and it’s absolutely wonderful. Kalamazoo’s beloved Zazio’s & Webster’s, located in the Radisson hotel downtown Kalamazoo, has transformed both concepts into a MAGNIFICENT new restaurant, Brick & Brine. AS ALWAYS, WE WERE SPOILED WITH EXCELLENT FOOD, GREAT SERVICE, AND DELICIOUS DRINKS! HERE’S THE RUNDOWN OF WHAT WE TRIED!

The bread and

the BRICK-FIRED

butter is still

MEATBALLS.

Zazio’s “breads and spreads” or bread with salted truffle oil, it’s just

BEGINNINGS

CHARRED OYSTERS My most frequently asked question where can I find oysters in Kalamazoo? Half-dozen chefselected oysters charred with scallion-garlic ash butter, grana, and lemon. Now traditionally, we love raw oysters and wouldn’t have opted for the charred oysters at first. All I can say is WOW! I will forever be a fan of charred oysters after trying these. The flavors were incredible together, and it reminded me a little of escargot (another favorite dish of mine.) *You can also order them raw with mignonette, house hot sauce, lemon.

as wonderful.

Anything served in a mini castiron skillet has my name all over it! I love the presentation of

If you loved

fabulous and now served as an adorable mini loaf of focaccia. Next, we tried the

BEEF TARTARE, which featured beef tenderloin with roasted garlic aioli, crispy capers, pickled shallots, garlic chips, and truffle oil served with toasted baguettes. OMG! This appetizer makes my mouth water just typing it. It’s the truffle oil and garlic aioli for me, but all of the flavors absolutely melt in your mouth, and I couldn’t put it down.

These house-made beef and pork meatballs were covered with tomato brodo, fontina, and herbs then served in a mini cast-iron skillet with grilled focaccia.

COCKTAILS Unique in its smokey flavor and presentation, the

FIRE HOUSE NO 4

is named after one of Kalamazoo’s oldest fire stations. It is a high-end oldfashioned featuring Four Roses small batch bourbon, luxardo syrup, orange + ango bitters, and smoked cherry wood.

WWW.BRICKANDBRINEKZ.COM 14

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THE LAST WALTZ is a gin martini with a beautiful presentation unique to Brick & Brine. I haven’t seen anything like it in Kalamazoo. It is so much fun to pop the bubble nd experience the magic of this cocktail. If you love cosmos, THE AMELIA is the drink for you. Arbor Spring Gin is combined with Long Road raspberry liqueur, lemon & St Germain and is garnished with a beautiful, edible flower. If you know me, you know my favorite cocktail is a dirty martini. Brick & Brine’s version is called the B&B DIRTY, featuring Grainger’s organic vodka, olive juice, house-smoked vermouth, and blue cheese stuffed olives. I typically opt out of vermouth but damn, if this isn’t my new favorite dirty martini! I love the unique flavor of the smoked vermouth. Now that cocktails and appetizers are covered, let’s get right into the main entrees! If you follow me or know us, then you know we love a good steak and seafood.

FROM THE FIRE THE CUT FOR TWO is a 32-ounce Tomahawk ribeye that is dry brined, perfectly cooked, sliced, and set atop arugula, marinated tomato, crispy fingerling potatoes, and onion rings. This is definitely big enough to share or if you are up to the challenge, try it alone.

Our next entrée was THE 48-HOUR SHORT RIB. These short ribs are sous vide for 48 hours and topped with a house-made salsa verde. These were SO tender, and the sauce was a wonderful compliment.

THE BONE-IN PORK CHOP was so juicy and flavorful! A Heritage Tomahawk Pork Chop, brined and topped with the most fantastic bourbon maple dijon. I highly recommend trying this dish.

FISH + FOWL

We decided to try THE SCALLOPS,

and they did not disappoint. Available as an appetizer or entrée, these perfectly cooked scallops are served over parsnip puree, roasted squash, broccolini, prosciutto, and fried sage, finished with a balsamic drizzle.

DESSERT We typically don’t go for desserts, but anything with fruit just calls to us, so we tried THE

BERRY CITRUS TART

Berry Citrus Tart - Elderflower Infused Strawberries, Raspberry Gelee, Lemon Lime Tart, Sweet Cream. Light and refreshing, this tart was the perfect ending to our meal! I cannot wait to try their GUINNESS CARAMEL ICE CREAM Bar on our next visit. The dessert menu also includes; BLOOD ORANGE SORBET, COOKIES & CONFECTIONS, APPLE PIE A LA MODE, and

MACKINAC ISLAND FUDGE CAKE.

A HUGE THANK YOU to everyone at Brick & Brine. It was great to see familiar faces and get to know the new ones. The new space gives big-city metro vibes and is classy, chic, and inviting. VISIT THEM ON

FACEBOOK OR INSTAGRAM, AND WWW. BRICKANDBRINEKZ.COM

PASTA

We decided to try THE BOLOGNESE for the pasta course, and it was incredibly impressive. The house-made Tagliatelle pasta is tossed with Bolognese Ragu, garlic crumb, and house lemon ricotta. I love that the pasta is made fresh in-house. Bolognese is one of my absolute favorite pasta dishes, and I love the addition of the garlic crumb for crunch and the house-made ricotta for creaminess!

Rachel Kirtley Rachel has worked in all levels of the food industry for over a decade. She is currently a Social Media Influencer, Content Creator and Restaurant Reviewer. You can visit her at thekalamazoofoodie.com.

March 2022

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HOME MAINTENANCE CHECKLIST

SPRING CLEANUP

BY ETHEL WILKEY DOWNS

CHECK YOUR BATTERIES

CHECK YOUR PLUMBING

Between 2007 and 2011, almost two-thirds of home fire deaths were in homes without working smoke detectors, according to the National Fire Protection Association. Change batteries in your smoke and carbon monoxide detectors once a year. The switch to daylight savings time is a good day to choose for the job.

Give your pipes a good once-over, checking under sinks to make sure there are no signs of leaks. Look up at your ceilings for telltale water stains – a sign of a leak in the wall.

Check faucets for drips and the flapper in the tank of your toilet to make sure it has not worn out (once the flapper starts to go, expect your toilet to run more frequently.)

Start outside, raking up any remaining leaves that survived the winter, and laying down mulch in your flower beds and beneath the hedges. A thin layer of mulch will protect plants from drought and keep weeds at bay. Turn your outside faucets back on, checking for damage. If you plan on hiring a lawn care service to maintain your property and mow your lawn, now is the time to renew your annual contract.

Ascension Medical Group Parkway Plastic Surgery Steven M. Nitsch, MD, Comprehensive Plastic Surgical Care Member of the American Society of Plastic Surgeons Liz Serbenski, Esthetician, Skin Care Specialist Offering: • Cosmetic and reconstructive breast surgery • Botox and injectable fillers • Cosmetic facial improvements • Body contouring • Micro-needling, chemical peels and custom facials • CoolSculpting — FDA approved and certified practice • Skin care To schedule an appointment, please call 269-343-5750. We look forward to caring for you.

Ascension Michigan © Ascension 2021. All rights reserved.

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IT’S A SELLER’S WORLD.

THINKING ABOUT SELLING? NOW MAY BE THE PERFECT TIME. IN TODAY'S HIGHLY COMPETITIVE MARKET, YOU’LL NEED STRONG, PROFESSIONAL GUIDANCE TO LEAD THE WAY.

From coaching you through my Home Readiness Program to ensure the highest market returns, to being diligent in my every move to get your offer accepted, no one works harder to help you achieve all your real estate goals. I LOOK FORWARD TO GUIDING YOU HOME. Ethel Wilkey-Downs, REALTOR® Berkshire Hathaway HomeServices - Michigan Real Estate

269.267.0515 ethelwilkey@bhhsmi.com fb.com/ethelwilkeyrealtor ethelwilkey.bhhsmichiganrealestate.com

March 2022

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STRATEGIES FOR

Professionalism BY KELLY DUGGAN

The way you behave when interacting with others leaves an indelible impact on your image. Most people wish to be seen as confident, knowledgeable, and noteworthy.

CREDIBILITY SABOTAGE

One way you can quickly sabotage that impression is by using self-deprecating phrases such as I’m sorry, I just..., I only..., I’ll try, I can’t, is that OK, It’s only me..., This might be a stupid question, and is it OK..., just to name a few. Phrases like these that undermine your value are damaging and unhealthy. If you know you are guilty, the first thing to do is acknowledge the behavior and become aware when you do it. Then, decide to practice the opposite behavior. Little by little, you will experience the difference positive and assertive phrases will make on how others treat you and how you feel about yourself.

RESPONDING TO CRITICISM

Everyone receives criticism at some point, and absolutely nobody enjoys the experience. However, those who respond positively demonstrate that not only are they willing to improve, it also shows they have the ego strength to do so - both are qualities of leaders.

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THE POWER OF A THANK YOU NOTE

We all love to be thanked, and a thankyou can go a long way toward boosting your career, helping you get a job offer, or cementing a positive relationship with a new contact. Few people expect to receive a thank you note, and so when one is received, it’s bound to make a big impression.

EMAIL PROFESSIONALISM

Writing a professional email is an important skill, even if you are not working in a professional capacity. We are all bombarded with so many emails these days that it’s all too easy for them to be overlooked or trashed without a second thought. Your open and reply rate will increase if you employ the following practices. -Add a precise subject line

-Start with a professional greeting -Keep it short and to the point -Close professionally -Proofread it twice

HANDWRITING

Do you know the study of handwriting is called Graphology, and it stems back as far as 1575? It’s amazing how much an individual’s handwriting can reveal about their personality traits, level of self-esteem, and other behaviors.

Large Letters

Indicate that the writer is outgoing, sociable, and may like being the center of attention.

Small Letters

Those with small writing are more likely to be shy and timid. Small writing is also an indicator of meticulousness and intense focus. Kelly Duggan Kelly is an Image Consultant specializing in executive and personal image development, etiquette & communication skills. She is a certified member of the Association of Image Consultants International. Contact Kelly at: www.kellyduggan.com.

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NOW ACCEPTING

new patients Empowering you to step fully into the life you want to live. Counseling is not only my profession, it is my passion and my calling. I am honored to walk with you through some of life’s most difficult seasons, to support and guide you into a healthier chapter. Learning to share thoughts, feelings, and concerns in a healthy way with yourself and others; counseling may be an extremely helpful resource for you to utilize.

Kim Powers

Licensed Professional Counselor in Kalamazoo, MI 510.827.1305 kimpowers@counselorkimpowers.com heartsoulmindstrengthllc.com

March 2022

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KIM CARSON’S INTERVIEW WITH DR. JULIE GOTTMAN, CO-AUTHOR OF

s e t a D t Eigh

IONS T A S R E V N O C L IA T ESSEN F LO V E O E IM T E IF L A R O F

KIM CARSON: Today, my conversation is with Dr. Julie Gottman. She is the co-author of

EIGHT DATES: Essential Conversations for a Lifetime of Love. Thank you so much for

talking with me.

DR. GOTTMAN: Thanks, Kim. Thanks for the opportunity.

KC: Well, you and your husband are pretty

much relationship experts, and you say that you can predict with a 90% accuracy if a couple will get a divorce. So, are we really that predictable?

Dr. G: We really are. We looked in our lab

at over 3,000 couples having conversations, and by the end of 20 years, it took a long time, we could figure out exactly what they needed to do to have a successful relationship, and that’s part of why we wrote this book.

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KC: What dooms a relationship? Dr. G: Well, what dooms a relationship are

what we call The Big Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse. Criticism, defensiveness, contempt (which is criticism from a place on high), and what we call stonewalling–or getting so physiologically flooded because you feel attacked that you shut down completely. This book helps avoid that and enables you to connect in a way that’s deeper, more fulfilling, and more satisfying for you.

KC: Yes, and you say that a happy relationship isn’t necessarily the result of even having a lot of things in common

Dr. G: That’s right. As a matter of fact, we’ve seen that opposites can attract. That’s one of those myths that’s really true. So, you don’t have to have everything in common. You don’t have to have the same values,

needs, and feelings about issues; you can be very different and still have a wonderful relationship. Good news.

KC: Yes, great news. So, Dr. Julie, are some people just not made for marriage?

Dr. G: There are very few people; I think, Kim,

most people want a deep connection. The Eight Dates book helps couples who may be talking only 35 minutes a week about a to-do list, “Did you call the plumber?” to instead having conversations on deeper, more fulfilling dates. We give you specific things to talk about and to ask your partner that doesn’t get into, “Let’s have a fight.” This book is to help you understand who your partner is at a much deeper level.

KC: Yes, you have, DATE ONE: Lean On Me,

that’s about trust and commitment, or DATE TWO: Agree to Disagree, DATE THREE: Let’s Get it On. The Cost of Love. I thought

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that was interesting because there you talk about work and money, and it’s not really about the money; it’s about what the money means. These little things that I’ve never even thought of before.

Dr. G: Yes, that’s exactly right. As a matter of

fact, when we were going through all of our research on couples and then sitting down, “What were they saying about money,” we came up with a list of 100 meanings of money, and we could have kept going. So, in this chapter, for example, when you go on a date, you’re asking your partner, “So, how did money get spent in your family? What did it mean to have money in your family? Did your family just exist happily in the nice working middle class, or did your family strive to get rich? Why did they want to get rich? What did money mean, and what does it mean to you? What do you want it to look like between the two of us?” It’s questions like that that we’re addressing in the book.

KC: Yes. It’s probably doubtful that everyone has those conversations. So, can Eight Dates help you know if the person you’re

dating is the right one?

Dr. G: It really can; that’s what’s so exciting.

It’s not so much, “Do we have everything in common?” That’s not what you’re looking for. What you’re looking for is, “Can we have these conversations? Do I feel listened to when I’m talking about my point of view

on this issue? Is my partner curious about who I am?” That’s a good thing. That tells you your partner wants to know you and maybe wants to spend a lifetime with you.

KC: Before my dad passed, my parents were

married for almost 75 years, and people always asked them, “What’s the secret?” It is one of those questions, “So what is the secret to a meaningful relationship Dr. Gottman?”

Dr. G: I think the secret is to realize that

nobody is perfect, and that’s actually really good news. This great study was done on couples called very neurotic, who were diagnosed neurotic, could they have good relationships. It turns out they could have great relationships, which thrills me to no end, right? I was very happy about that. So, the reality is that all of us long for deeper connections. We all have that hollow place inside that needs another human being to connect with, love, and be loved by, and most of us need that. So, if we can have conversations like these that will change over the decades because we change over the decades, you are destined to have a beautiful relationship.

KC: Do you believe in soulmates? Dr. G: Soulmates is, I think, a little idealized.

I don’t believe in soulmates simply because soulmates are typically people you think are just like you, and the problem with finding soulmates is do you want to be married to your mirror image. I don’t think so. I think you’d get bored silly after about a year. So, we want somebody different, and this research shows that we are attracted to different people. Those are the ones that pull us in, and that’s fine; that can make for a much richer relationship.

KC: So, for all of the research you’ve done, what do you think is the most interesting thing you’ve discovered through your work, and how did it even lead you to write Eight Dates?

Dr. G: What we found is that every single

person, no matter their education, no matter their IQ, their EQ, any other Q, is a philosopher. If you go down deep, every person has a set of values and a set of dreams that they long for, and that they believe in, that they want to live. The book, Eight Dates helps each couple talk about those deeper levels of values, what you need, what you feel, what your history is, and how that influences you here and now. The great thing is that you don’t have to think of the questions to ask your partner to learn those things. We give those to you in an entertaining way that helps you have those deeper connections for a lifetime.

KC: I love this quote from Eight Dates, “The

foundation for any relationship is trust and understanding, and the way to build this trust is to learn the skills of attuning to one another through non-defensive listening.” This is such an excellent read. It’s timely for anyone interested in learning about having those tough conversations, about those tough topics sometimes, and doing it without getting into a fight. It’s all about the deeper connection. Where can people reach out to you, Dr. Julie?

Dr. G: They can reach out to us at

www. gottman.com, and the book is online and in local bookstores across the country. It’s everywhere. Thank you.

KC: The book’s name: EIGHT DATES: Essential Conversations for a Lifetime of Love. Thank you so much for talking with me today. I enjoyed it.

Dr. G: I liked it, too. It was fun. Thank you, Kim.

Kim Carson Kim is an Author/Podcast/TV/ Internet personality. Watch and listen for her on WGVU TV’s Kalamazoo Lively Arts and J. Schwanke’s Life In Bloom. Learn more at kimcarson.online and fb.com/kimcarson

March 2022

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|

RECIPES |

March Recipes Celebrate St. Patty’s Day by trying these twists on classic Irish fare!

Irish Beer Cheese Soup 1 packet of your favorite white hot chocolate mix 4 bread bowls (for soup) 1 large onion, peeled and chopped 2 cloves garlic, minced 1 tablespoon butter 2 (12-ounce) bottles Harp Irish Style Lager 1 32-ounces chicken stock 14 ounces Irish Cheddar, shredded 14 ounces cream cheese, cut into cubes 2 tablespoons cornstarch 2 tablespoons Dijon mustard GARNISHES: crumbled bacon, chives Set a large sauce pot over medium heat. Add butter, onions, and garlic, and sauté for 5 minutes. Scoop the cooked onions into the food processor (or blender) and add one cup chicken stock. Puree

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March 2022

the onions and stock until completely smooth. Pour the onion mixture back into the sauce pot and add the remaining stock and both bottles of beer.

NOTE: The beer broth will foam up quite a bit when boiling. Make sure to use a large pot so it doesn’t boil over.

Bring to a boil over medium-high heat, then lower the heat to medium-low.

Toss the shredded Irish cheese with cornstarch. Add the shredded cheese, cream cheese, and Dijon mustard to the broth. Whisk to melt the cheese and break up the cream cheese cubes. Whisk until the soup is completely smooth and slightly thickened, about 10 minutes. Taste, then salt and pepper as needed. Serve in prepared bread bowls and garnish with bacon and chives if desired.

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Air Fryer Reuben Egg Rolls 12 egg roll wrappers 2 tbsp oil, for cooking 18 ounces corned beef, approximately 10 slices ½ cup Swiss cheese, approximately 5 slices ½ cup sauerkraut Thousand Island dressing, for serving Dice the corned beef into bite sized pieces.

Dice the Swiss cheese or mozzarella cheese into bite sized pieces or shred.

corners to the center and then tightly roll. Repeat with remaining egg roll wrappers.

In a medium sized bowl combine the corned beef, cheese and sauerkraut. Mix until combined.

Brush both sides of the egg rolls with oil and Air Fry at 400°F for 5-10 minutes or until golden brown.

Add 1 – 2 tablespoons of the filling to the center of each egg roll wrapper.

Allow the egg rolls to cool for 2-3 minutes before serving, the filling will be very hot.

Dip your finger in water and wet the edges of the egg roll wrapper. Fold in two opposite

Serve with Thousand Island dressing to dip and enjoy!

Irish Cream Chocolate Cake 1 box chocolate cake mix FILLING 1 (14 ounce) can sweetened condensed milk 1/3 cup heavy cream 1/3 cup cocoa powder ¼ cup Bailey’s Irish Cream Liquor FROSTING 1 cup butter, room temperature 5 cups powdered sugar ½ cup Bailey’s Irish Cream Liquor ¼ cup cocoa powder 1 teaspoon vanilla extract ½ teaspoon salt Preheat oven to 350°F. Spray 13 x 9 baking pan with non-stick spray.

Prepare chocolate cake mix, according to package directions. Pour the batter into the prepared pan. Bake for 25 minutes. Let cool to room temperature and poke holes all over the top of the cake.

butter, powdered sugar, Bailey’s, cocoa powder, vanilla and salt. Mix until smooth and fluffy. Spread frosting over cooled cake and ENJOY!

In a medium bowl, add the sweetened condensed milk, heavy cream, cocoa powder, and Bailey’s. With a whisk, mix to combine. Pour Bailey’s filling over cake and spread evenly. Refrigerate 1 to 2 hours. In the large bowl of a stand mixer add

March 2022

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|

ONE WOMAN’S OPINION |

Can our Children Fix This? BY HEIDI MCCRARY

“We’re screwed,” my husband said, watching the evening news featuring yet another fire overtaking a suburb on the West Coast. “There’s no coming back from this. We’ve really screwed up the earth this time.” “No,” I replied, adhering to the number one rule in our house. Only one person is allowed to wallow in self-pity or outright terror at the thought of the world having a finite end date. This rule allows us to voice our fears without falling into a hole of despair. By voicing a counterpoint, we can maintain a hope that the world will go on and our place in it, intact, however simplistic or fictitious it may be. It allows us to sleep at night. “Our children will fix this,” I continued. “I have the utmost faith in them.” Our children, what exactly have we handed them? A world that seems to be eternally on fire, where snowstorms are blasting areas known for housing palm trees, and ongoing heat waves continue to overtake the Midwest in December. It’s scary, unnatural, and inevitable that we are not heading in a positive direction for world sustainability. But I have faith… If the current Pandemic has taught us anything, it’s this… We are more resilient than we give ourselves credit for. One friend of mine recently wrote on social media that going forward, our new normal will be a world less convenient. Gone are the days when we could travel without care, stores were open at all hours, carrying an endless supply of groceries and products, and garbage wasn’t piling up at a dangerous speed.

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March 2022

But first, we must recognize how we got to this point. How did we allow ourselves to become so complacent that waiting a second day on our Amazon delivery causes us a headache? How did we get to a place where showering with a simple bar of soap turned into pumping liquid soap from yet another plastic container? Where wiping down the kitchen counter with a sponge morphed into detoxing the kitchen with chemically-induced wipes? Where having our dinner shipped to us in a multitude of boxes with all the necessary parts is now commonplace for families? What have we done? And more importantly, is it too late to change? Author Jonathan Safran Foer sounded the alarms in his recently published book, “We Are the Weather.” In it, he simultaneously warns us to start the process of healing the earth and changing our ways while also letting us know that we’re too late to the party to change the trajectory of our carelessness. It’s a painful read and paints a picture of doomsday. Putting down the book, I didn’t know whether to change my ways FAST or simply start on my bucket list, knowing that our days are numbered. Looking at these two doors, I’ve decided to go the way of action and optimism.

We can and must live with less. Less convenience, less plastic, less stuff. When you’ve reached the point where you need more containers to hold all your belongings, you have too much stuff. We don’t need more containers; we simply need to stop buying things we don’t need. While my generation may not hear the warning bells, our children are hearing them loud and clear. That is perhaps why the up-andcoming generation isn’t interested in fast cars that drink endless gallons of gasoline and why they aren’t buying massive houses equipped with a plethora of bathrooms and lawn sprinkler systems that spray unending streams of water. I choose to believe the earth will bounce back, but only if we stop this carefree cycle of indulgence. I have faith in us and our children. In the words of a politician, I am cautiously optimistic. We can do better. And let’s hope our children learn from our mistakes. Heidi McCrary Heidi is a writer and a regular contributor to Moxie Magazine. Her novel, “Chasing North Star” is available at Kazoo Books, This is a Bookstore, and online wherever books are sold. Follow Heidi at heidimccrary.net and fb.com/HeidiMcCraryAuthor

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269.779.2900 269.779.2900 AdvancingLives.myASEAlive.com AdvancingLives.myASEAlive.com Jacque@AdvancingLives.biz Jacque@AdvancingLives.biz I N D E P E N D E N T A S S O C I AT E

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