Woman To Woman With Joanne The Magazine June 2016 Issue

Page 6 Nikie Lomax Page 12

Buying a Car? Page 14

Pamela Junior Page 16

Conference Gallery Pages 24-25

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Publisher & Editor Joanne Bell CEO Joanne Bell Account Executive Salmeilia Stewart Contributing Writers Carl Rogel (Guest Writer) Salmeilia Stewart Roikensha Craig Terica McKennis Cover Design by James E. Roach III Cover Photo by X-Pose’ Photography & Design Layout Design Latasha Willis Facebook: Woman to Woman with Joanne the Magazine Website: www.JoanneSBell.com Contact us at woman2woman.joanne@ yahoo.com 601-398-6733 P.O. Box 2031 Ridgeland, MS 39158 All rights reserved. No portion of Woman to Woman with Joanne may be reproduced without written permission from the publisher. The management of Woman to Woman with Joanne is not responsible for opinions expressed by its writers. Woman to Woman with Joanne maintains the unrestricted right to edit or refuse all submitted material. All advertisements are subject to approval by the publisher. The production of Woman to Woman is funded by advertising and sponsorship.

E

Joanne’s Desk

BY JOANNE BELL, FOUNDER

ver felt trapped inside a box or locked in a cage? What is the difference, you ask?

Inside the box, you can’t really see what’s going on outside - you just feel like there is more to life than what is on the inside of the box.

You don’t really know what you’re missing because the walls are so high and you can’t see over them or through them, but you know in your heart there is something more to life than what you see inside the box.

My experience has taught me that being trapped in a box for so long begins to feel safe and comfortable, and you start to fear the unknown - the outside of the box. In the box, you are surrounded by four walls, and inside those four walls, you are familiar with everything there. Everything is the same every day and nothing changes, no surprises. Also inside the box, you always have a voice or a person telling you why you shouldn’t try to go outside because of all the bad stuff that’s out there or what MIGHT happen. The fear of what might happen becomes so strong that you don’t even want to think about what’s outside the box.

You stop dreaming. Fear makes you afraid to dream.

Being locked inside of a cage

is totally different. You’ve been outside before, but something happened that made you withdraw and get locked inside the cage again. Maybe you tried something and failed. Whatever the case may be, you’re trapped again but you desperately want to get out.

Unlike being trapped in a box, in the cage, you can see out and you can see everything going on around you. You see how life could be, but the cage is locked and you feel you have no power to get out.

You’ve lost your confidence, you don’t trust anyone and your faith is weak. You feel helpless, like a victim. You start to dream and imagine what it would be like to be outside of the cage, but you’re trapped and can’t figure a way out.

You see other people doing the things you used to dream about doing. You long to have a different life where there are no chains and no boundaries.

What is your box? It could be that you are trapped inside of your imagination or a fantasy world that some people use as an escape from reality because it hurts too bad.

What is your cage? It could lead to jealousy, envy and all types of frustrations because you see people on the outside living the life you want to live, but you have locked

yourself away in a cage because of fear.

I have been in both of these situations and I tell you the truth, it’s not easy to get out once you find yourself trapped. It takes work and practice. Yes, practice. First, find scriptures that pertain to your specific situation. Next find a quiet place to go for prayer and meditation daily, then use praise and worship as your weapons. Praise God for what He has done and worship Him for what you expect Him to do. Pray daily, several times a day if you have to. Allow God to be a part of everything that you do. Not just your finances, not just your relationships, not just your job, but invite Him into every part of your life. You will still endure problems and situations, but it will be so much easier with God on your side.

So I say to you, never stop dreaming and never stop fighting to be free from the boxes and the cages that are trying to hold you bound. Dare to be bold! Dare to be confident! Dare to dream!

Love ya much!

Joanne

In This Issue

Melissa Banks: Dare to Dream ................................................................................................................................ 6-7 The Will to Win and Defying the Urge to Quit ...................................................................................................... 10 “Women in Law”: Nikie Lomax ........................................................................................................................... 12 Buying a Car in Today’s Marketplace .................................................................................................................. 14 Pamela D.C. Junior .................................................................................................................................................. 16 “What About My Dreams?” Said the Mom ........................................................................................................ 18 Fear Over Your Destiny ........................................................................................................................................... 20 Gallery: Woman to Woman with Joanne’s Second Annual Empowerment Conference ............................. 24-25

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Melissa Banks:

Dare to Dream

M

elissa Banks is a wedding and event planner, floral designer and decorator. Melissa has received training and attended conferences in Alabama, Tennessee, Texas, Georgia, Mississippi and the Caribbean. Melissa is known for her attention to details and her professionalism. She has the creative talent and passion for designing spectacular events and transforming your dreams into reality. Melissa has the natural talent of turning the ordinary into the extraordinary.

Melissa took her first course at the Career and Development Center in Jackson, Mississippi and received her certification in floral design. Later, she received her bridal consultant certification from Penn Foster University, which led to a membership with the Association of Bridal Consultants (ABC). Membership with ABC changed the game, and she was in the wedding industry and absolutely loved it.

During her first year in business, she completed three weddings and had the time of her life. Soon she was asked to participate in the Mississippi Bridal Association (MBA) Bridal Show in Jackson, Mississippi. After her first year of membership, she was asked to become the premier decorator for the show. This was quite an opportunity, and it grew bigger and bigger every year.

Melissa was invited to be a member of the board for MBA, and in that position, she was able to give input on the direction of the association. MBA launched a certification program for bridal consultants, and Melissa was asked to lead those programs. It was a six-week course, and she was thrilled to be able to help so many ladies launch or grow their wedding businesses.

In 2015, Melissa was part of Premier Bride of Mississippi where she participated in two shows and received the honor of being named The Best of Premier Bride. This was quite an honor! You see, Melissa left the life she loved and stayed gone from it for a little while. It’s been said that if God places a dream in you, it doesn’t leave you, even if you leave it. Melissa believes that God was preparing her for a blessing that He already had for her.

Today, Melissa and her team plan, design and decorate for weddings, vow renewals, anniversaries, birthday parties, banquets and so much more.

Here is a little of her story: How was it growing up in Jackson, Mississippi?

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I was born in Mississippi and have lived here my whole life. I graduated from Callaway High School.

Growing up in Jackson was hard, but my mom shielded us from a lot of things. My mom was a single parent and we had a lot of struggles, but we didn’t realize how much we struggled until we became adults because she protected us from a lot of things that were happening. My mom endured a lot of things racially that we didn’t know about until we became adults. She actually participated in the freedom walks when the Freedom Riders would come to town. I can remember when schools were segregated and when they told us we had to go to school with the white kids, and they didn’t really want us there.

How was it when you started going to the desegregated schools? Were you subjected to a lot of racism?

I was, but the thing is it was just as different for them as it was for us. They had been taught that they were better than us, their hair was better and they were better because their skin was lighter, so we did deal with a lot. I was in the fifth grade when the schools were desegregated, so the first year was really hard.

I remember one girl following me home every day because she wanted to fight me.

How would you describe Mississippi then and now in your words?

I don’t think Mississippi has gone as far as people think racially. I think that there is so much racism going on right now in our businesses. I know that when I participate in bridal shows, if there is a white business right next to me, black and white customers are going to go to the white business because they think the white business is better. So when we do shows, we are competing for the white customers as well as the black customers.

I do appreciate that we have a lot of black businesses doing such a great job with being professional because we are fighting a battle against both sides, and that is very unfortunate. I had a prospective client sitting in my chair, and they didn’t hire me because the groom said he wanted a white decorator because he thought they would be more professional. However, I have gotten so comfortable and so strong in my faith that I don’t worry because I know that my clients are handpicked by God, and they are for me. I am professional and I learn my skills, and I go out there and I do my part.

There was a time when you quit the event planning business. What made you leave the industry and what made you come back?

Often times when your faith is not in a place where you can trust God to do what you can’t, trying to do it yourself becomes overwhelming. In Mississippi, vendors are not helpful because we are all competing for the same dollar and they sometimes do deceitful things. I dealt with so much backstabbing to the point that another vendor was showing up at my events, taking pictures of my work and showing it as her own. Then I was trying to hire staff, and they were just coming in to learn the process and then leave and start their own businesses. On top of all that, there were financial issues. It all became so overwhelming that I decided the next wedding I did would be my last, and that’s exactly what happened.

For five years, I didn’t talk to anybody in the industry.

I didn’t watch any shows; I didn’t follow anybody. I

love David Tutera and Preston Bailey, [and] I have followed them forever, but I didn’t even follow them anymore because I was done. So, I took a full-time job.

So what brought you back?

One day, I was sick and I was sitting in my lounge chair when my friend sent me a text that said, “Guess who got engaged?” with a picture of her finger with the engagement ring. She said, “Melissa, you have to come out of retirement for my wedding,” and I said, “You know what? I am going to do your wedding as a friend, but I am not coming out of retirement.” At that moment, I just felt God say, “It’s time.” So, I started writing down some things, and I started looking and it just started happening. I just know that I wasn’t planning to get back in it, but God said, “Okay, you have learned what I needed you to learn while you were away. Now it’s time to come back.”

Since I’ve been back, God has moved in my life in so many ways. There are a lot of people that were in my space then that are not in my space now, and there’s a reason for that. I feel His presence every day in everything that I do, in every approach to design and in every person I work with. Now I can look at that person sitting in front of me and decide if we are a good fit based on our connection instead of just trying to take the job at any price because I need that check coming in. I’m trusting God to put the people there that I am supposed to work with. I tell my potential clients that if it’s not me that you connect with, you shouldn’t hire me. When it doesn’t feel right, God gives you those feelings for a reason and you shouldn’t ignore them.

How did you select the people who work with you?

I held a workshop and I trained the participants on how to plan a perfect day. We went through the process that I go through with the client. One of the things I offered was an internship following the completion of the workshop. From the ones that were interested in the internship, I interviewed them, and explained the process and how it works. They would work several events with me hands on, and if they were a good fit, we could offer them a position on the (Continued, page 8)

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ago would I be where I am now spiritually, I wouldn’t have understood the question because I thought I was spiritual. I’ve been in church my entire life and we get that mixed up. I could hear Brother Pittman talking [and] saying, “You’ve got to grow your faith,” so I know I am where I am supposed to be. My blessing is already prepared - I just have to go get it. That keeps me even when I have more bills than money. At one time, I would have been freaking out and taking on a wedding just because I needed the money today… and now my approach to my business and my life is not like that anymore. That girl that was afraid to speak for a long time is not that girl now, but she was necessary. All of that was necessary for me to be the person I am today.

(Continued from page 7) team, and if not, you have gotten some training in.

Finding help is a challenge because we work really hard, and I know no one is going to love it like I do, but I do want to work with people who have good energy and not bad energy. You can’t put in negative and get out positive, so I can’t have a lot of negative energy around me. That’s important to me, so I don’t just want to put the net out there and choose whoever falls in it.

I have one person who has been with me from the very beginning. She left town for a couple of years, but when she came back, she came right back to the team. She is awesome and she loves just being a part of the team, and that’s what I want. I don’t want us to just show up on the job - I want us to get to know each other, and be able to inspire and lift each other up, so that’s what I’ve been working to build. The team we have now came back when I came back, and we also have a couple of new ladies who started with us this year, so we now have seven ladies who work with us.

How do you handle working a full-time job and being a full-time business owner?

I work a lot of long days and fortunately, my job gives me some flexibility. On my lunch hour, I meet clients. I work in Pearl, but I come back to my office in Jackson to have a consultation with a client and I juggle it. I work tired a lot of days, but I think that when you are passionate about something, you make it work. I sit at my desk, and I make a list of what I need to achieve today for my job and for my business.

So, on my desk, you will see both lists because both things have to be accomplished. I have to do what is required of me at my job and I have to invest in my business every single day. There are no days that I don’t do something that pertains to my business, and fortunately, it has worked for me.

For the women who still work full time but want to start a business, and to women who feel it’s time to leave their full-time job but find themselves sinking in their business afterward, what advice would you give those women?

You have to love what you do! That is the first advice I would give to someone who wants to start a business.

You have to love it. You can’t like it and don’t look at the money because it can’t sustain you. You’ve got to love it, because if you don’t love it, you won’t have what it takes to stay there during the down days.

I love this business. If you look at my calendar you would probably ask, “Why is this girl going to work every day?” But God hasn’t placed it on my heart to leave my job, and it’s not going to be a decision that I make - it’s going to be a decision that He makes.

What happens to us is that we start booking stuff and we get excited, then we leave our jobs, and there is so much going on and this is what [we] love to do…

Then you get to the downtime, and whatever your why is has to sustain you. It has to be strong enough to help you push through November when wedding season is over. It has to be able to push you.

So, have a plan and determine your why, and put that why on your wall. In my office at home, I have a vision board, I have a goal poster, I have a monthly goal poster, and I need all of that stuff to keep me fo-

cused on my why. When you can focus on your why, it will push you through those days when the phone is not ringing. In this business, when your phone is quiet, you start to get a little nervous, but you have to stay focused on your why. I have scriptures that push me and motivate me. Before, I didn’t have that and I didn’t know that. I didn’t have anyone motivating me to do that, and that had not been revealed to me.

Once you get to that level, [and] when it’s time to transition, it will feel right and you will know.

How has your spiritual life kept you afloat? What do you do to help you during those down times? Is there a song or a favorite preacher or scripture that you turn to?

I feed my mind daily. When I get in my car I’m going to listen to Les Brown or Joel Osteen - somebody motivational. One while, it was Les Brown every day.

Right now, I’m listening to Joel Osteen because he is one of my favorites. I might go three weeks and listen to the same message over and over. Then in the mornings, I have my time where I pray and I have some affirmation scriptures that I say out loud every day. They push me and they motivate me. I talk to God every single day about my business and about the person I am today.

I grew up in a single-parent home, and I got married young. The marriage was not good. It was abusive, and I was told that I wasn’t going to be anything every day for a long time. So from that person who was too afraid to speak to anybody, to now being a person who can’t shut up, I am grateful. Through all of this, God has taught me so many lessons, and I spend some time daily being grateful and just praising Him. Then I spend some time asking for what I want because He said you have to ask, and I believe that.

At the beginning of the year, I told God this is your business do with it what you want. And that was the best decision of my life!

[At] the church I attend, our minister is so passionate about the work of God, and he teaches us how to “faith it,” and that has been better for me than anything that I have ever done, and I feel my faith growing stronger every day. I’ve heard people say, “I can feel the presence of the Lord,” and [some respond], “Yeah, you ain’t feeling nothing nobody else is feeling in here.” But that’s not true. I can feel the presence of God, and I can feel God’s hands on my life and the different situations that I face. Does that mean my life is cushy? No. I still have a lot of things that I have to deal with, but my approach to those things is so different. If you would have asked me three years

Who motivates you? Who was your encourager, the one person you knew you could turn to?

That would be my mother. I told her this the other day, and she wasn’t aware of it, but she has been my strength. Even though I made mistakes and I mess up, I can go to her, and she is going to lift me up and encourage me and be there for me regardless of what I do or say or how I feel. I speak to my mom every morning, and I cannot start my day without it.

She is my strength, and I thank God for her. She is 82 years old, and I know we are on bonus and I am [grateful] that she is still here because she is without a doubt the person who pushes me, and she doesn’t even have to do anything. Just her saying, “How are you doing today?” or “Who’s helping you?” or “Just keep praying,” those things that mommas say. She is definitely my strength.

What has been your favorite wedding or event since you’ve been back?

I recently worked with a couple, and it was just fun every step of the process. They were young, and one was about to graduate from medical school and trying to plan a wedding at the same time. There were a lot of elements and we were involved in every single aspect. I knew for about a year and a half that her dream had been to have an outside wedding. The day of the wedding, it didn’t just rain - it stormed with the wind blowing and everything. So when I delivered the news to her that she would not be able to get married outside, the hurt on her face broke my heart. She looked at me and said, “You are not just my planner - you are like my other mother through this process. What are we going to do?” And I wanted to say, let me fix this rain! Of course, I couldn’t fix the rain, but God did and it cleared up. By the time she walked down the aisle, the sun was shining, and it was so beautiful and an awesome experience. As she stood to say thank you to everyone, she stated that this was her dream wedding. That’s why I do it, and that’s my motto: Dare to Dream.

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The Will to Win

and Defying the Urge to Quit BY SALMEILIA JE' STEWART

D

About the Author: Salmeilia is the mother of an eight-year-old son named Jaden and currently resides in Jackson, MS. She is an actress, writer and comedienne.

She works for Phoenix Rising Entertainment.

When she is not working, she enjoys taking pictures and having a great cup of coffee. You may follow Salmeilia on Instagram @Salmeilia and Facebook @Salmeilia Je'.

ays are rapidly approaching until my 30th birthday, and I find myself relentlessly reflecting over my life.

Several questions come to mind like, "What have I learned? What areas of my life could I stand to improve? How would I like to be remembered?

What would I do differently if given the opportunity?" Like most people, I left several questions unanswered as there are many areas of my life I would love to improve. Where I am today is a direct result of my belief in either feeling powerless or powerful. I will admit I’ve always had a choice, even when it didn’t look like I did, and I’ve always had a desire to win, but I haven’t always been able to defy the urge to quit.

As I reflect over my life, I can remember a time when I adopted a loser mentality. During my childhood, I faced rejection, ridicule and abuse.

As a result, I found myself victimizing certain areas of my life by not taking responsibility for my actions. I simply allowed life to just happen. I was never truly an active participant in my own life. I kept waiting for a “one day” to come when I wouldn’t have to face any adversity or difficulty.

When problems would come my way, I would just crumble to pieces or passively suffer through them. This pattern of behavior is called learned helplessness. According to Wikipedia’s definition, learned helplessness is “behavior typical of an organism (human or animal) that has endured repeated painful or otherwise aversive stimuli which it was unable to escape or avoid. After such experience, the organism often fails to learn escape or avoidance in new situations where such behavior would be effective.”

I often wondered why my life wasn’t progressing as quickly as others and why I always seemed to be left behind, but one sure way to be left behind and not become a winner is to be a quitter. I habitually gave into the temptation of quitting. When things didn’t go the way I expected, or if they seemed too difficult, I would simply wave the white flag of surrender. As T.D. Jakes said, “There is a peace in quitting.” Oh, how in the moment I loved that peace. However, my lack of commitment forced me to repeatedly restart the same cycle over and over again. One day, I woke up and decided to finish whatever project I initially started. If I wanted to win in life, I had to first learn how to complete a task. I prayed and asked God to bless me with the spirit of completion. “Now finish the work, so that your eager willingness to do it may be matched by your completion of it, according to your means.”

(2 Corinthians 8:11) I can now say that I have found a personal satisfaction in completion. When

you complete the task at hand, it gives you insight and room to measure, and there is so much to be learned from your mistakes that will increase your chances of winning.

Another struggle I had was not attempting to try anything new or different. This was my way of avoiding disappointment. If I didn’t try, I didn’t have to feel hurt or pain. Consequently, I was hurting myself because my lack of trying automatically set me up for failure.

Over the past couple of years, I have slowly adopted the mindset of a winner. The will to win doesn’t begin at the end of the race or after you have accepted the award. The will to win first begins in the mind. A decision has to be made that no matter what, I will win. I have to tell myself before I make one step that I am already a winner.

I may not know how, when or where - I just know I will win. Instead of praying for my problems to go away, I started believing that I had already won.

I had to rid myself of any notion of an overnight success and realize that the road to becoming a winner can be very long, lonely and painful.

This realization and my ever growing desire to be triumphant has led to my love for football. In the words of Lewis Grizzard, “The game of life is a lot like football. You have to tackle your problems, block your fears and score your points when you get the opportunity.” These players know that football is a contact sport. They know the team’s success is not based on playing to not get hit, but playing to win.

How many of us play the game of life trying not to get hit? I know I have. But, I’ve had to reshift my focus, turning it from trying not to get hit into that I will do whatever it takes to win, including getting hit. People of this nature tend to walk in love due to their love of winning, because when they are pushed to the edge of quitting, they are reminded of their purpose and why they even began.

I know that in the past I have underestimated what it takes to be a winner. He didn’t say I wouldn’t have problems, but He did say that in time I will have the victory. “But thanks be to God! He gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ. Therefore, my dear brothers and sisters, stand firm. Let nothing move you. Always give yourself fully to the work of the Lord, because you know that your labor in the Lord is not in vain” (I Corinthians 15:57-58). As I approach 30, I’m asking myself daily, "What steps am I taking to become a winner? Are the thoughts I’m thinking leaning towards defeat or victory?" I’m learning to make a daily decision to win. It’s not an easy process, but I know it will be well worth it in the end.

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WOMEN IN LAW: M

s. Lomax is a native of Crystal Springs, Mississippi. She attended Crystal Springs High School, where she graduated with high honors. As a recipient of the Chancellor’s Leadership Class Scholarship and the Vice Chancellor’s Housing Scholarship, Ms. Lomax went on to pursue a Bachelor of Arts in English, with a minor in art from the University of Mississippi. After graduating from Ole Miss, Ms. Lomax received the Virgil Hawkins Law Fellowship to attend the University of Florida, Fredric G. Levin College of Law where she received her Juris Doctorate in 2001.

Ms. Lomax went into private practice in December 2002. Prior to going into the private sector, she was a senior attorney with the Department of Children and Families, Child Welfare Legal Services, working in the area of juvenile dependency. Ms. Lomax has extensive experience working with children and family services. Her primary areas of practice are marital and family law, wills and trusts, probate, guardianship and immigration law.

Ms. Lomax has taught legal methods at Florida A&M University College of Law and Business Law at Belhaven University. She enjoys using her experience as a practicing attorney to train the lawyers and scholars of the future.

She has also worked as a certified mediator in family law cases.

Ms. Lomax is active in the community and believes that to whom much is given, much is required. She has served as a pro bono teaching attorney and volunteer guardian ad litem with the Legal Aid Society of the Orange County Bar Association (OCBA). In addition to her volunteer work with the OCBA, Ms. Lomax served on the board of directors for the BETA Center, the Victim Service Center of Central Florida and for Redeeming Light Center Church. She is a current member of the Florida Bar Association and Delta Sigma Theta Sorority, Inc. In previous years, Ms. Lomax was a member of the United States District Court, Middle District of Florida; Orange County Bar Association; the Central Florida Association of Women

Nikie N. Lomax, Esq.

Lawyers and the Central Florida Family Law American Inn of Court. Her strong work ethic and a commitment to the community makes Ms. Lomax an excellent attorney and advocate.

Below, she shares a part of her story with us: My favorite quote is from Marianne Williamson: “Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, 'Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented and fabulous?' Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people will not feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine as children do.

We are born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It is not just in some of us - it is in all of us, and as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give others permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.” These words always speak to my spirit. They remind me that I am a brilliant, gorgeous, talented, intelligent, fabulous woman who cannot deprive the world of all the greatness that is within me. My journey to becoming an attorney was filled with challenges, losses and victories that helped mold and shape me into the compassionate, diligent and thoughtful attorney that I am today.

Every tear shed and every joyous moment was necessary to lead me to this place of faith and fulfillment.

Being raised by a single mother, I learned early on that discipline, dedication and perseverance were required to attain my goals.

Growing up dark skinned and skinny, with glasses to boot, was no small feat in rural Mississippi. There were many insecurities inhabiting my mind. Fortunately, I had many people who were cheering me on towards my dream of becoming an attorney. My grandfather, J.C., would always tell people that his granddaughter was going to be a lawyer. Mind

you, I was only eight when I first made that proclamation; but nonetheless, my grandfather spoke life into that dream on a regular basis. What I did not realize then was that he was speaking to the light inside of me. He was giving me permission to shine. He was liberating me from my insecurities so I could see that I had the power to realize my dreams.

So, what is the takeaway? What do I say to someone who wants to chase their dreams? I say be bold! Be brave! Be fierce in your pursuit!

Be relentless and tune out doubt! Everyone will not see the vision for your life or support you in your pursuit, and that is just fine. God gave the vision to you, so don’t let the naysayers discourage you. God will equip you with everything you need to accomplish your dreams.

He will place the right people in your path to support you and pour into your spirit.

Being spiritually grounded in my faith centers me and keeps me in peace when things around me are in turmoil. When I am off center, God sends a word, or He sends in those preordained people to speak into my life and help renew my faith. The greatest gift of my 15 years as an attorney is that this journey has truly taught me how to walk by faith and not by sight. There were many times when God placed a ram in the bush because I trusted him to provide. There were even more times that God allowed me to be a source of hope and light to those around me as I walked in my purpose. So I say to you - get out of your comfort zone! Walk in your purpose! Dream God-sized dreams and be the light!

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BY CARL ROGEL, OWNER OF ROGEL FORD

B

uying a car in today’s market can be both an exciting and nerve-wrecking experience. I’ve been in the automobile industry for 35 years now, and I can warn buyers about all of the ins and outs. Most Salesmen think that a woman shopper is an easy target, a chance to really make some money. The truth of the matter is that most of the professionals - the salespeople who really care about a customer’s wants and needs are gone from the business and have been replaced by a new generation that just wants your money.

My theory has always been different. I tell my staff not to try to sell anyone anything. Their job is to help you find the right vehicle. That’s called a vehicle consultant. If you think someone is trying to sell you something, buyer beware.

Don't get ripped off!

Before you sign on the dotted line, I recommend the following:

• • • •

Payments Insurance Gas Maintenance

1. Do your research, look at several models online and check how the There is a lot to consider. Buying a vehicles are rated.

2. Always test drive the vehicle. Like vehicle is the second biggest purchase most of us will ever make. a nice pair of shoes, they can be Do not buy a car without a warthe same size but fit differently. ranty. A warranty can save you from 3. Get everything in writing. Whatfinancial disaster. Check the fine print ever it is, unless it’s in writing, it and see what the warranty covers. If means nothing. you can't afford the payment with the 4. Never buy if it's your first time warranty, you can't afford the car. in the dealership. Get copies of Most importantly, take your time, everything and go home. This will give you a chance to compare on- ask questions, do research online and line and do some more research. It work with someone you can trust.

My dealership’s business model is will take the emotion out of your customer first, rare in today's world. financial decision.

5. Check the dealer's reviews. If they We would rather not have you buy a have bad reviews, either don’t buy car period than to buy the wrong one.

Good luck, and happy shopping! there or be very careful.

6. Most importantly, look at the overall cost: Empower yourself. You are the one to say yes or no. Refuse to be pressured.

- Carl Rogel

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16 • WOMAN TO WOMAN WITH JOANNE: THE MAGAZINE • June 2016

FEATURE:

Pamela D.C. Junior

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otivational speaker and historian Pamela D. C. Junior is the director of the Smith Robertson Museum and Cultural Center in Jackson, Mississippi.

The museum is housed in the former Smith Robertson School, the first public school built for African-Americans in Jackson. Pamela manages the preservation and conservation of an enormous collection of artifacts regarding the Mississippi African-American experience, both past and present. She stands on the shoulders of three women whose vision for the Smith Robertson Museum and Cultural Center lives on today: Dr. Jessie B. Mosley, founder and first director; Dr. Alferdteen Harrison, co-founder and historian; and Ruth A. B. Campbell, retired cultural deputy director, at the Department of Human and Cultural Services.

Pamela uses the museum as an educational tool for students. In her words, “If we teach children about the history of the AfricanAmerican — telling the story of the African’s pride, their strengths and fortitudes, their struggles, their barriers, and their survival in a new world — you will secure a twinkle in their eyes that will last forever.”

In January of 2014, Smith Robertson Museum and Cultural Center was included in CNN's list called "50 States, 50 Spots.” Pamela was named the 2014 Hometown Hero by the Jackson Convention and Visitors Bureau. In January of 2015, Pamela received the For My People Award for her artistic and academic commitment to the black community. Also,

in February 2015, she received a proclamation from the City of Jackson, Mississippi for her professionalism, diligence and dedication to service in making a positive impact in this community.

Pamela is a passionate advocate for women’s rights. She travels throughout Mississippi speaking, mentoring and uplifting physically and mentally abused women. This public speaking journey is called, “Empowering, Strengthening and Live!” She also has a new venture, PJ’s History Tours and Talks, where she takes groups on a tour of “Black Jackson.”

Pamela is a board member of the Greenwood Cemetery Association; advisory board member for the Mississippi Children’s Museum; advisory board member for the new Mississippi History Museum, task-force member for the Mississippi Civil Rights Museum, on the board of directors for the Mississippi Book Festival, and on the board of directors for the Mississippi Delta National Heritage Area.

Pamela is also co-founder of the Mississippi Black Theater Festival.

Pamela enjoys writing, reading and working with organizations of service. She believes that “the integrity of two people joined together to bring about an offspring stays in that lineage forever. If the head is wrong, the body, the flesh, the soul will be wronged forever. We must work on the head.”

Pamela earned a B.S. in therapeutic recreation, with a minor in special education from Jackson State University. She is the mother of two sons, Alfred and Jarrel.

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18 • WOMAN TO WOMAN WITH JOANNE: THE MAGAZINE • June 2016

THE

LIFE

"What about my dreams?" said the MOM

I

once read a quote that said, "You can be a good mother and still follow your dreams. You totally can, if you so desire."

After reading this, a million thoughts began to run through my mind. Promotions, achieving a Ph.D., public service and fulfilling my entrepreneurial goals are just a few things that society would have me believe are impossible to achieve because I am a mommy. Well, that is certainly not going to be my story! I have to believe in God's word that tells me, "I can do ALL things through Christ who strengthens me" (Philippians 3:14).

Day by day, month by month and year by year, I am chipping away at the above list of dreams I have plotted for my life. I am determined to achieve them. My mother once gave me a bookmark that read, "The will of God will never take you where the grace of God can’t keep you." OMG! What a golden nugget she gave me on that day. I can still remember thinking, "I could go anywhere in life," and, "I could do anything I set my mind to do." I also remember feeling how much she believed in me. I could feel that she really knew the inner me, at the core, and that she knew I had big dreams of taking the world by storm

and leaving an incredible impact on the lives of children and families. I knew then that she understood who I was to be in this life.

Those are the kind of moments I want to give McKenzie and Madison. I want them to know they can dream big, map out a plan to succeed and execute with the confidence that God has their back. I want them to not be afraid of hard work in order to achieve their dreams. I want them to run their race steadily and with stamina, and know that the will of God will not take them where the grace of God can’t keep them.

Whether you are a single mom or married, pursuing and achieving your dreams with little ones is challenging and demanding.

Making time to develop a realistic timeframe and plan of execution, and disciplined grind time is crucial. These are also the most difficult to secure when little ones are pulling the hem of your dress. On more than one occasion, I have had to remind myself that women have achieved awesome things while juggling little ones, work and family.

Surrounding yourself with other moms who share your go-getter outlook as well as seeking and securing resources to support

BY ROIKENSHA CRAIG

your journey is the next critical piece. I am always encouraged by one of my favorite scriptures, ""For I know the plans I have for you,' declares the Lord, 'plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future...'" Jeremiah 29:11 (NIV). I am very thankful for the support of my husband, sisters and family - especially my husband, for without his love, support and genius advice, this road would have even more bumps. My ultimate dream has always been to become a devoted mother and wife, and I am definitely living my ultimate dream. Being the wife of Keith and mother to McKenzie and Madison, if I do not accomplish anything else, my life is complete, as I am living my ultimate dream.

Whatever your dreams may be, know that they are achievable. Yes! Achieving our dreams involves work, discipline, self-determination, continuous education and development, and sheer passion. Develop your plan.

Commit to your plan. Execute your plan to achieve your dreams. It is possible! Do not delay - start today!

Until next time, love yourself!

About the Author: Roikensha lives in Washington, DC with her husband, Keith, and her two daughters, McKenzie Brook (2 years) and Madison Grace (11 months). She is discovering her roles as a career mom and wife, as she is the Exeutive Director of YMCA Head Start in Central Maryland in Baltimore City. You can follow Roikensha on Twitter @TheMLife1, Instagram – themlife2015, and through her website – www.themlife.org.

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20 • WOMAN TO WOMAN WITH JOANNE: THE MAGAZINE • June 2016

Fear Over Your Destiny BY TEE FITZ

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HAT ARE YOU AFRAID OF DOING THESE DAYS? Stepping out of your comfort zone into the realm of the unknown is where you meet your destiny face to face. Sometimes, it can be very challenging when you want to move forward because fear is ever present. The fear of failure will always come knocking on your door, but your calling will never stop calling. The more you seek Christ, the more you will press into your calling. Fear will attempt to paralyze you and keep you far from your destiny, but Jesus is coming back soon, and we really don’t have time to waste before it’s all said and done.

As believers of Christ, we have a charge to assist others. We must assist the brokenhearted and help others reach their destiny.

I am called to the ministry of helps, and I assist others with their health and fitness. I

understand that it is indeed a very serious platform, and I am willing to take this assignment. I started in the fitness industry for my own personal health. I struggled with losing weight, my nutrition and selfdiscipline, and I struggled with insecurities.

Looking back, I realized the reasons I struggled in these areas was that I was fearful of the unknown. I knew I needed to conquer these areas in my life because it was getting out of control. Fear held me in bondage for so long that I actually started believing all of the lies that were being fed to me.

THE MOMENT MY LIFE CHANGED When I began training and seeing results, little by little, I started coming out of my fearful shell. I saw that I could lose weight, and that I did not have to struggle with any of these areas in my life any more. Day by day, I am making strides and reaching my destiny.

One day, I hope to collide with my destiny and truly assist people in a way that the world is unfamiliar with. My goal is to teach and coach in such a way that for every client I minister to, their lives will never be the same.

Every morning that I wake up, my calling is more and more alive on the inside of me. My future and my destiny speaks to me every day. I wake up to joy and happiness because I know that the joy of the LORD is my strength, and in Him I am very strong!

So what drives you? Refuse to allow fear to have control of your destiny any longer.

A stronger you is waiting to come out. The new you desires to truly live. Live on purpose every day and refuse to cave in to fear.

Your future is worth fighting for. You can reach your destiny and live in harmony with everyone you come in contact with. Live long - live strong. xoxo

About the Author: Tee Fitz AKA Fitnezzgirl lives in Yuba City, California with her husband King Willie McKennis and her training camp (Talitha, 11 and Willie, Jr., 9). She is a personal trainer both online and in person at FitnezzGirl. She is a Youth Pastor with her husband, and Executive Assistant at Church Alive. She can be reached at Tee Fitz via Facebook, @iamfitnezzgirl via Instagram and at www.fitnezzgirl.wordpress.com.

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22 • WOMAN TO WOMAN WITH JOANNE: THE MAGAZINE • June 2016

WOMAN TO WOMAN WITH JOANNE: THE MAGAZINE • 23

Mr. D’s Food Palace 105 E. Georgetown St. Crystal Springs, MS 39059 601-892-8992 Monday – Friday 11am – 9pm Saturday – 7am – 10pm Breakfast Buffet

Darren Powell Owner

Sunday 11am – 3pm Lunch and Dinner

24 • WOMAN TO WOMAN WITH JOANNE: THE MAGAZINE • June 2016

SECOND ANNUAL EMPOWERMENT CONFERENCE MAY 6 - 7, 2016

Friday night...

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Saturday...

26 • WOMAN TO WOMAN WITH JOANNE: THE MAGAZINE • June 2016

Quatrisa Irving, Optometrist 1200 E. County Line Road (601) 957-6078 Northpark Mall (601) 957-6924 [fax] Ridgeland, MS 39157 irvingeyecare@yahoo.com

Hours of Operation: Monday - Saturday: 9:00am-6:00pm Sunday: 12:00pm-4:00pm

WOMAN TO WOMAN WITH JOANNE: THE MAGAZINE • 27

PK’s Styling Salon PRISCILLA KENDRICK Stylist & Owner

P.O. Box 708 119 E. Cunningham Ave. Terry, MS 39170 (601) 878-5121 Appointments and Walk-ins

Woman to Woman with Joanne: The Magazine is searching for three energetic and outgoing sales people.

Please contact 601-398-6733 or email woman2woman.joanne@yahoo.com for more information.