Tickles - Whakatane Parents Centre - December 2019 / January 2020 by WhkPC

TICKLES WHAKATÄ&#x20AC;NE PARENTS CENTRE MAGAZINE

FINAL ISSUE - December 2019 / January 2020

INSIDE THIS ISSUE... SUMMER EVENTS BANISH CHRISTMAS STRESS HELPING A FRIEND WITH POSTNATAL DEPRESSION

O A STLAND S

SCH O L PSRpaE O ce to play

a n d learn

“Building a sense of self worth and optimism”

Quality care for children aged 2 to 5

20 hours ECE for 3 to 5 year olds

Visit any time, any day

Whakatane’s most spacious preschool

9 Fishermans Drive, Coastlands • 07 3089302 www.coastlandspreschool.co.nz admin@coastlandspreschool.co.nz

FROM THE EDITOR CONTENTS CHILDBIRTH EDUCATION CLASSES............4 WHAT’S ON................................................5 WHAT’S ONLINE........................................ 7 LIFE OUT OF BALANCE? PUT YOURSELF BACK ON THE LIST .................................... 8 HELPING A FRIEND WITH POSTNATAL DEPRESSION ............................................12 A FEW FAVOURITES ................................14 BANISH CHRISTMAS STRESS - DO IT YOUR WAY .........................................................16 HOLIDAY SURVIVAL GUIDE .....................18 MEMBER OFFERS.....................................24 COMMUNITY DIRECTORY........................26 HIRE EQUIPMENT....................................27

The news, views and articles published in this newsletter are not necessarily those of Whakatāne Parents Centre or Parents Centre New Zealand. The information is for you to agree to disagree with, we leave you to draw your own conclusions. We do not endorse any particular product or service in this newsletter, over any other.

FINAL ISSUE Yes you read that right - this will be the final issue of Tickles. The committee has decided to focus more on social media - so make sure you like us on Facebook as we will be regularly sharing articles, events and all the goodness you have found within Tickles up to now. I hope you’ve found some useful tips in Tickles. Remember you can always contact us for tips and support - via Facebook or email are your best beats. I’d also like to offer a massive thank you to Kim and Rachel at Whakatane Libraries who have been fantastic at providing great suggestions in the library section. Please continue to support our local library. They are fantastic! Another thing - as at the time of publication no ads for the Baby Factory had been supplied. So please keep an eye on your inbox to grab some bargains. Hope you have a restful summer. KIM Temporary Editor - Whakatāne Parents Centre

Thanks to...

027 977 9951 whakatāne@parentscentre.org.nz parentscentre.org.nz/Whakatāne

CHILDBIRTH EDUCATION CLASSES

FREE CBE CLASSES - GET A HEAD START! Childbirth education (aka antenatal) classes are not just for first time parents. They are a great way to meet other expectant parents and prepare for the big day. The classes are suitable for couples and singles alike, with support people welcome. We have friendly, qualified childbirth educators to take you through all the things you need. Did you know? Childbirth education classes are

COURSE 8 - 2019 Dues dates until end of Jan 2020 Tuesday and Thursday evenings 5, 7, 12, 14, 19 November

the number one way to set up a coffee group. There might not always be coffee involved, but there will be a support network of parents who you can laugh, cry and share the ups and downs with. Some coffee groups around here are celebrating their kidsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; 21st birthdays together. Friends for life can start with a course! CBE Classes are free. To enroll please contact our CBE Coordinator, Leah Murphy on 027 828 0996 or email her at whakatÄ ne@parentscentre.org.nz.

COURSE 1 - 2020 Dues dates until end of mid April 2020. Saturday 11th January & Saturday 18th January

COURSE 9 - 2019

COURSE 2 - 2020

Dues dates until end of Feb 2020.

Dues dates until mid June 2020.

Saturday 7th December & Saturday 14th December.

Saturday 4th April & Saturday 11th April

WHATâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S ON OPOTIKI LANTERN FESTIVAL Princess St Reserve, Opotiki Sat 18 January 2020 - 3pm to 9pm $10 adult, $5 kids, free for under 5

SUMMER CROSS 2019 Sat 28 Dec 7am to Sun 29 Dec 5pm Awakaponga Entry Fees: Day 1 Family $25 / Adult $10 / Kids $7 Day 2 - Family $35 / Adult $20 / Kids $10

KAWERAU CHRISTMAS IN THE PARK Sat 14 Dec 11am Prideaux Park

1XX & ROTARY CHRISTMAS PARADE Sat 14 December - 10am Check online for parade route

WHAKATANE TOUCH ASSOCIATION CHARITABLE TRUST ANNUAL TOUCH TOURNAMENT 2020 Free - Rex Morpeth Park Fri 10 and Sat 11 Jan

WHATâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S ONLINE

the motherhood project nz

ABOUT THE MOTHERHOOD PROJECT NZ The Motherhood Project NZ is the brainchild of Gemma Douglas who has pulled together a collection of health professionals (psychology, nutrition etc) along with other mothers to create a supportive community to empower the modern mother. Check it out for resources to help you on this journey.

www.facebook.com/motherhoodproject @themotherhoodprojectnz www.themotherhoodproject.co.nz

LIFE OUT OF BALANCE?

PUT YOURSELF BACK ON THE LIST “I know one thing for sure. It is impossible to find one’s own balance from the outside in. I now know beyond a doubt that finding—and maintaining—our balance is an inside job.” – Lu Hanessian When you’re at home with your family, you have a running list. Change the baby, feed the toddler, teach the preschooler to pick up her toys, get the elementary schooler to do his homework, help the tween braid her hair, negotiate with the teen, make dinner, fold laundry, pay the bills, email your boss, connect with your partner... the list never stops. But have you fallen off your own list? The only way to keep your cup full in the constant vortex of parenting is to tend to yourself even while you tend to your child. Throughout your day, can you make it a priority to check in with yourself? Often, we’re surprised to realize that we deny our desires automatically, without even noticing it. Maybe we’d love a cup of tea while we help our child with that project but “it’s too much trouble.” Maybe we really need a hug or

a good cry. Maybe we’re tempted to pick up a crayon and enjoy expressing our creativity while our child is coloring, but we’d feel silly. Or maybe we simply need a quick visit to the bathroom, but we routinely wait until we absolutely can’t delay any longer. Starting today, put what you need on the list and do it as soon as you can. Yes, it is possible. Here’s how. 1. TODAY, AT THE SAME TIME THAT YOU’RE TAKING CARE OF YOUR CHILD, CHECK IN WITH YOURSELF. Notice what you need. Is there anything you can give yourself right now that would help you stay in balance? Sure, you need to tend to your child. But tend to yourself at the same time, or as soon as possible. At each moment there is some small thing that would nurture you physically, emotionally, mentally or spiritually. Find it and give it to yourself. If there’s something important that you really need but you aren’t getting, like sleep, make a plan. Let’s say your infant wakes up all night and you have a toddler to tend to during the

day. It’s not doing your toddler any good for you to drag yourself through your life feeling resentful. You don’t need to be a martyr. Figure out a way to get the help you need, even just a step in the right direction. That will give you the momentum to take another step. 2. MAKE IT A HABIT TO TUNE INTO YOURSELF AS OFTEN AS POSSIBLE THROUGHOUT YOUR DAY. When we’re distracted, children act out to get us to come back into the moment to connect with them. When we’re more present, they respond by wanting to “follow” us.

rain, the curve of your child’s cheek, the lilt of her laugh. Then, make it a habit. Breathing and noticing beauty are two reliable doorways to presence. 3. BEFORE YOU PICK UP YOUR CHILD AT DAYCARE, OR WALK INTO THE HOUSE, STOP. Take a deep breath and ask yourself “What do you need right now, My Love?” Listen to whatever answer pops up. Make a deal with yourself about when you can meet that need, and how you will do it. For instance, if the answer you hear is “Comfort” you’ll want to

What one thing can you do right now to give yourself more support? Simply being present with yourself is an essential form of “attention” that we all need. If you work outside the home, this is usually easier to do in the course of the day, but most of us don’t do it. We get hooked on the adrenaline of rushing. But you’ll be better at your job if you get into the habit of being more present. And if you’re home with children, it’s essential. How to become more present? Just take a deep breath and let it flood your body with well-being. Breathe in calm, breathe out stress. Shift out of your thinking and into your senses: Notice the light on the leaves, the smell of the

find a way to work some snuggle time with your child and/or your spouse into your evening. If the answer is “A break!” you may want to order pizza for dinner and put everyone to bed early so you can take a long bath. Of course, if you get the same answer every day, you may need to make some structural changes in your life. 4. SLOW DOWN AND SHOW UP. Often we’re so focused on the list that we forget to really live. But this is the only chance you get in this body, and your child really will be grown in the blink of an eye. If you’re too

busy to revel in your child’s natural joy, you’re turning up your nose at the fuel that keeps you going as a parent. What happened to that joyful, exuberant person inside you? He or she is your antidote to burnout. Yes, your family and household will demand every moment you have. But many of those moments are full of joy, if you choose to simply enjoy them, and let the pressure go for a bit. Your life doesn’t have to be perfect for you to soak in every moment of goodness you can.

5. PARENT YOURSELF. Whose job is it to nurture you? Yours. Spouses, partners, friends and families are companions on the journey, but we can only take in from them what we’re able to give to ourselves. If you weren’t nurtured enough as a little one, this may take some learning. Start by talking to yourself like someone you love. Nurture yourself through the hard times. Acknowledge just how hard it all is, and how hard you try. You don’t need to be perfect. You are more than enough, exactly as you are. You deserve all the tenderness you would shower on a newborn baby. Giving that love to ourselves transforms our parenting--and our lives. Ok, so when the baby’s crying and you yourself need a good cry, it’s true that the baby comes first. But tuning into yourself and embracing yourself with love at the same time--and crying, if you need to-will make you both feel better. For today, just notice your internal barometer as you put yourself back on your list. 1 is depleted, 10 is a full cup. How are you doing? What one thing can you do right now to give yourself more support? www.ahaparenting.com

Parents & Babies Mainly for first time

Space for you and your baby is offered around New Zealand. New parents and their babies meet weekly giving them the opportunity to make real connections during their babyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s first year. Parents consider different perspectives about parenting and child development, explore music, rhymes, books and a variety of play experiences in a safe, facilitated environment Topics discussed may include:

Sleeping

Becoming a parent Establishing attachment The beauty of the brain Expressing myself Treasure ba skets and heuristic play

Contact EBOP Playcentres (Whakatane region) (07) 576 5403 or bop.programmes@playcentre.org.nz Visit www.space.org.nz to find out about Space for you and your baby near you!

connect

explore

contribute

belong 11

for you and your baby

HELPING A FRIEND WITH POSTNATAL DEPRESSION IMOGEN SAYS, “I HAVE A CLOSE FRIEND WITH POSTNATAL DEPRESSION. HER NEW BABY IS ONLY 7 WEEKS OLD AND SHE HAS A TODDLER TOO. I WANT TO HELP BUT SHE DOESN’T SEEM TO WANT ANY CONTACT, SHE KEEPS PUSHING ME AWAY. I KNOW SHE DOESN’T HAVE ANY FAMILY SUPPORT, HOW CAN I HELP HER? Postnatal depression is a debilitating illness that devastates families and disrupts friendships right when you most need a network of support. Symptoms include: mood swings, anxiety or panic; sleep disturbances unrelated to the baby’s needs (this seems like a cruel joke – baby is sleeping soundly and you are wide awake), changes in appetite, chronic exhaustion or hyperactivity (ironing at 3 a.m?); crying – feeling sad and crying for no apparent reason or feeling like you want to cry but can’t; irritability (your partner can’t get anything right, no matter how hard he or she tries); negative, obsessive thoughts; fear of being alone or withdrawing from family and friends; loss of memory or concentration, unrealistic feelings of inadequacy or guilt, loss

of confidence and self-esteem. Often the mood swings, anxiety and irrational thoughts that can accompany this ‘invisible’ illness make it very difficult to accept help. Leila, a mum who suffered with depression after her first baby says, “I didn’t want anyone around because I felt embarrassed about how I looked and how the house looked. As selfish as it sounds now, having meals dropped off and people trying to do everything for me just made me feel worse. It was as if I couldn’t even take care of my family, so I became consumed with guilt and anger that other people were pitying me.” Danielle says, “ I was suffering from severe anxiety. Offers of help seemed to fuel my anxiety – (in my mind) there were lots of ‘what ifs’ and catastrophic thoughts. On one hand, the thought of anyone popping in unannounced made me feel worse but if they planned ahead, I would often become so anxious that I would cancel a visit or an outing.” The experience of PND and what would be helpful is as unique as the individual woman

herself. Although there can be a sense of embarrassment or shame about ‘not coping’ for some women, others are much more willing to accept practical help. Tara says, “what helped me the most was knowing that when I really needed help, somebody was there. Daily tasks were a battle – one of my biggest challenges was wandering around the house not knowing where to start so it was great having someone to share them with. I had some great friends who would drop everything and come over when I wasn’t coping at all and just needed somebody to be with me. They would watch my baby while I had a shower and make me a cuppa or they would mind her while I slept. Sometimes I didn’t feel like talking at all but having them there was comfort enough.” While it is awful watching a friend suffer with depression, especially if she seems to be pushing you away, there are ways to show your support. Here are some suggestions from mums who have been there. Consider which steps you can take, start small and please don’t take it personally if your efforts don’t seem appreciated right now. Remember, Postnatal Depression is an illness that your friend has no control over, she will get better (as long as she has appropriate treatment) and she will remember that you were there for her, even if you can only do seemingly small things to help. REACHING OUT: Listen: Don’t offer advice and don’t compare your own experience to your friend’s. She may feel worse if you start saying, “when I had my baby……” Tread gently, and be comfortable with silence if she doesn’t want to talk –she will find it difficult enough to make sense of her thoughts, without feeling judged.

personally if she doesn’t text you back. She will when she is ready. Remember, Depression is so debilitating, that just getting out of bed can be a huge effort some days. Drop off food: Drop off a meal, a favourite cake or some muffins and perhaps a lunchbox and an activity (stickers) for her toddler, if this isn’t her first baby. You can leave food in an eski on her doorstep and text when you drop it or ask her partner to pick up on his way home. If you drop a meal inside, don’t stay unless she is ok with that and don’t race around her home doing things – hang out a load of washing, offer to take her children outside and play with them or watch them while she has a sleep. Take her child(ren): Offer to take her older child to an activity class/playgroup/ your place/a playground so she can have a break and the little one has some fun. Take her out: Sunshine and a change of scenery can be great for lifting moods but make it simple, perhaps a short walk together, a visit to a nearby park or coffee at a local café. Offer a short outing that isn’t overwhelming or exhausting. Again, don’t take it personally if your friend opts out at the last minute. Her anxiety may have surfaced so let her know it’s ok if she can’t manage this time. Be there: Don’t disappear, don’t give up on your friend and don’t feel offended if she gets angry with you. Depression is a cruel illness and recovery will take months and longer, but with treatment and support your friend will recover. And when she gets better, your friendship will be even stronger, because you have been there all along. www.pinkymckay.com

Text: She may not feel like a visit, but a text will show her you are thinking of her. Don’t take it

A FEW

FAVOURITES

Tis the beginning of the season when publishers and reviewers put out their best of the year book lists. We thought we just list a few of our favourite things and hope you get a chance to enjoy them too. GARY BY LEILA RUDGE.

anything this is the book for you. Without detracting from the importance of specialists in our world, this title beautifully illustrates how important generalists are. And even better, that they will likely be the people that make the big world changing discoveries of the future.

Gary is a pigeon, a pigeon with a cute pompom hat. He lives in a loft with racing pigeons and loves hearing about adventures. Gary is a bird with a dream. This is a brilliant story all about finding unique ways to do things.

This is an excellent summer read, likeable protagonists, bit of drama, on the money humour and just enough intrigue.

OI PLATYPUS BY KES GRAY AND JIM FIELD.

THIS IS GUS BY CHRIS CHATTERTON

Brilliant illustrations, the best rhyming story and a little bit of dry humour to keep the grown-ups on task. The author illustrator team have done a whole series of oi books, I for one am very grateful.

Has all the elements of a great picture book. Awesome illustrations, humour, and a main character that makes you smile and shake your head because you really know somebody just like that â&#x20AC;Ś

RANGE: HOW GENERALISTS TRIUMPH IN A SPECIALIST WORLD BY DAVID EPSTEIN. If you are one of those people who is prepared to give most things a go but donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t feel like an expert in

QUEEN OF HEARTS BY KIMMERY MARTIN

HOME BASED CHILD CARE AVAILABLE • • • • • •

Quality, affordable childcare available in your area 20 ECE FREE hours for 3-4 year olds WINZ subsidies available for those who qualify FREE toy, equipment & resource library Registered ECE Teachers supporting your childs learning & development Your child will receive one on one care & attention

For more information or any other questions please phone us today!

0800 543 996 info@akidzworld.co.nz www.akidzworld.co.nz

BABY & YOU Are you a new parent?

‘Baby & You’ explores the first three months of your baby’s life and gives practical information about stimulation for babies, age-appropriate toys and the key milestones of your baby’s growth. Contact us about doing a one off class. You get freebies from Huggies and Johnsons and some valuable information. To book phone 027 977 9951 and leave a message, email whakatāne@parentscentre.org.nz or find us on Facebook.

Banish Christmas Stress DO IT YOUR WAY

Presents to buy, parties to plan (and attend), decorations and food to organise, standing in queues with excited children who want to meet the big man in the red suit (then shriek with fear when they get up close) and, if you are expecting holiday visitors, you will also have to clean and cook and prepare the spare room. It is all too easy to feel overwhelmed by pressure to make this time special for everybody around you, often at the expense of your own well-being. After all, just because it’s ‘that time of year’, you don’t have any more hours in each day. The ‘silly season’ can be enough to try the patience of the most wellintentioned

super-mummy and instead of feeling the joy, Christmas can see you becoming a ‘Mummy Grinch’ and spoiling everybody’s fun. If you feel your stress levels rising at the mere thought of hitting the shops or choosing gifts, let alone spending Christmas day with relatives that you try and avoid all year, slow down. Take a deep breath and centre yourself then consider, what is really important here? How do I really want my little ones to remember Christmas? How can I ‘downsize’ while still making Christmas meaningful? DITCH THE PRESSURE If you love doing the tree, making cards or driving around looking at houses all lit up, enjoy it. If everything feels too overwhelming, keep things simple: you don’t have to make an elaborate gingerbread house or hand made cards to make Christmas meaningful. In fact, if sending cards feels like an extra ‘to do’ let it go and please ditch the guilt, along with the pressure. You can call old Aunty Madge and pop the kids on the phone for a chat. Or see if she knows how to Skype on her iPad (you could be surprised). She will enjoy this more than a card anyway. SET YOUR INNER CONTROL FREAK FREE. If your kids are old enough to make decorations, let them; if they are old enough to wrap gifts, hand them the sticky tape; if they want to decorate the tree, set it up and step back or gently guide if things are looking a bit ‘bottom heavy’ (because they can’t reach the higher

branches). If you can calm your control freak urges, it could be loads of fun to allow the kids to paint a Christmas window (think, a quaint, stick figure nativity). No, your house won’t look like the glossy homemaker magazines but you will be inspiring creativity and sharing happy memories. This is meaningful. DELEGATE: If you are hosting the family dinner, write a list of the basic food you need and let each person contribute a dish or two. Consider whether family members can manage cooking or how their budget might stretch and if it would be better to request nibbles or drinks. KEEP GIFT GIVING SIMPLE Ask yourself again, how do I really want my little ones to remember Christmas? Chances are, toddlers will have as much fun playing with empty boxes and wrapping paper as they do with new toys. Whatever their ages, kids don’t need their parents to be stressed out for months because you have blown the plastic trying to give them amazing gifts. Consider, can you give an experience they can anticipate with excitement and gift them with happy memories, instead of more ‘stuff’? There is a lovely saying, ‘something you want, something you need, something to wear and something to read.’ This can be helpful as a guide to simplify gift giving. And for extended family, why not try a Secret Santa? Each person just buys for one other person and setting a price limit keeps things fair for everyone.

PLAN SUPPORT FOR ‘THE BIG DAY.’ If you are panicking about Christmas day itself because it will involve spending a whole day with family members who may be critical of your parenting style (“in our day….”) or intolerant of your little ones’ behaviour (from over-tired toddlers to a grizzly baby who is likely to become more fractious if you are tense about breastfeeding in front of Uncle Tom so this affects your ‘let down’ and your baby pulls off and exposes more of your nipple!), talk to your partner beforehand about how you can be prepared and what specific support you will need. If you are feeling vulnerable but have a supportive family member such as a sister, ask her to be your buddy for the day and help you with your children or deflect criticism that comes your way. DO IT YOUR WAY There are as many ways to celebrate Christmas as there are individual families, so it is impossible to please everybody or to live up to high ideals of the perfect Christmas. Remember, you are more likely to create happy memories for your children if you are relaxed, so please give yourself the gift of kindness – be as realistic about your expectations of yourself as you are with your children, stop to smell the pine needles and do the things YOU enjoy. This way, you will feel the joy and be able to share it with your little ones. www.pinkymckay.com Holiday Survival Guide

Holiday

SURVIVAL GUIDE

Disrupted schedules, traveling with little ones, the crash and burn from all the excitement -Holidays can easily be a recipe for tears and tantrums. Here’s how to manage life during the holidays to minimize the tears and maximize the joy. 1. THE MOST IMPORTANT TIP, AS ALWAYS IN PARENTING, IS TO MANAGE YOURSELF SO YOU CAN STAY CALM. Remember that the holidays are actually stressful for children. Your child depends on you not only to regulate their environment, but also to help them regulate their moods. If you’re anxious about everything you have to get done, your children will almost certainly begin to act out. Every day, find ways to keep your own cup full. If you’re running on empty, you won’t be able to help your kids stay on an even keel. 2. GIVE KIDS PLENTY OF WARNING ABOUT TRAVEL AND UPCOMING EVENTS. At the beginning of the holidays, you might use a calendar to show your child what will happen each day. (“Then the day before Christmas we leave for Grandma’s, where you’ll get to play with all the cousins.”) Many kids love to make a little book in advance, where each page represents a new day and they draw a

picture of what will be happening. Sit down for a snuggle every morning and describe the day ahead. 3. COACH YOUR KIDS ABOUT THE SOCIAL BEHAVIOR YOU EXPECT. Role play with them in the car before you arrive, or make a game of it before you go. “What do you say when Aunt Susie gives you a present?” “What if you don’t like the present?” “What do you when Uncle Norman wants to hug you hello?” “What if you don’t like the dinner that’s served?” “When you want to leave the table, how do you ask?” “What will you do if the cousins start arguing?” 4. PLAN NO MORE THAN ONE EVENT PER DAY. If you’re visiting your in-laws, don’t plan the morning with the cousins and the afternoon at Aunt Betty’s. Kids need downtime, just to chill out, snuggle, and do whatever relaxes them. If they don’t get it, they’ll melt down or get oppositional when the over-stimulation gets to them.

5. HAVE AGE-APPROPRIATE EXPECTATIONS. If you’re doing a lot of visiting with adults, be sure the kids have something to occupy them. If they can read, buy them a new book for the occasion, one they can’t wait to get into. If they’re too young to stay absorbed in a book, bring a favorite movie. Be sure your schedule includes visits to the playground or other opportunities for the kids to get some fresh air and physical activity. 6. WATCH YOUR KIDS’ FOOD INTAKE IN THE MIDST OF TOO MANY TREATS AND BUSY SCHEDULES. Many tantrums originate from hunger. And all parents recognize the sugar high that sends kids bouncing off walls and then crashing into tears. If necessary, speak with your relatives in advance about limiting treats. And carry small protein-rich snacks with you so your child doesn’t have a melt-down while the adults are negotiating where to go to dinner.

7. IF YOU GO ON VACATION, BE SURE IT RECHARGES AND RECONNECTS YOUR FAMILY. Some of us look forward to the kids’ school vacations as a chance to leave town in search of warm weather or winter sports. That can give you plenty of chances for family connection, especially if you forgo organized evenings in favor of family board games. What you want to avoid, of course, is racing around before you leave, getting stressed out by a busy trip, and returning home in need of a vacation. Kids tend to get cranky and stressed with travel and schedule changes, so plan accordingly. 8. IF YOU’RE FLYING WITH KIDS ...be sure to arrive early enough that they get to “run” a bit in the airport hallway after sitting still in the car and before sitting still on the plane. If there are two adults, send one to pre-board and grab an overhead bin, while the

other one waits to board with your child, to minimize the time he has to sit in his seat. Make sure to change diapers and use the bathroom just before boarding. If you use overnight diapers (more absorbent), you might get lucky and avoid diaper changes on the flight. Special secret for painless flights: Bring small wrapped “presents” – books, treats, chapstick,

for kids, so many children do better if you impose a little routine during the vacation. It can be very simple, just a plan for the day so that no one is surprised by all the transitions. Don’t forget to include outdoor time and physical activity, which all children need to stay regulated.

STOP! Hug your children and regroup.... congratulate yourself on a job well done puzzles, simple crafts – for each child. Kids can look forward to getting one as soon as they’ve buckled their seat belts, and several more whenever you need a distraction mid-flight. Blue painter’s tape always comes in handy, too -- you can make a tic-tac-toe board on the tray table, use it for crafts, tape up blankets to make a cozy fort, and even make a hopscotch board in the airport while you’re waiting. If your little one is not nursing, be sure to bring bottles, sugar-free lollipops or something else to suck on during take-off and landing to minimize ear pain in those little ear drums. 9. KEEP CHILDREN ON THEIR REGULAR SCHEDULE AS MUCH AS POSSIBLE. When children are off school, the lack of structure can be liberating -- for them and for you. But unpredictability can also be stressful

10. DO LESS, CONNECT MORE. There are so many wonderful opportunities during the holidays that we often find ourselves taking on too much and getting into a bad mood. If you notice this happening, pare back your schedule to do only the essentials. Your kids don’t need a magazine-spread holiday. They need you, in a good mood, living the spirit of the season and spreading love and good cheer. The minute your mood veers from loving to frenzied, STOP. Hug your children and regroup. And at New Years, pat yourself on the back and congratulate yourself on a job well done, not just in December, but every day, all year long. You’re a hero, just because you get up every morning and try to do right by your child. Appreciate yourself, so you can keep being heroic! www.ahaparenting.com

WHAKATĀNE CAR SEAT CLINIC ON THE SECOND TUESDAY OF EACH MONTH 10AM-1PM

Did you know? It’s 70% safer to rearward face. Plunket recommend rear-facing until at least 2 years of age. Come along and let us check that your car seat is correctly fitted and work safely. Appointments not necessary. Donations to help cover our time are appreciated.

10 Victoria Avenue, Whakatāne

MEMBER OFFERS

5% OFF

The normal retail price of all non sale items when you show your valid Parents Centre membership card.

COST PLUS 10% Only available at WhakatÄ ne Noel Leeming (exclusions apply). Valid Parents Centre card must be presented.

10% OFF $5 OFF ANY NEW YEARLY MEMBERSHIP. VALID PARENTS CENTRE CARD MUST BE PRESENTED.

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Parents Centre members receive discounts on Heating, Cooling, Water Filters and more from HRV. Contact HRV to book in for your no obligation Home Assessment to see how HRV can help improve your home! Mention Parents Centre and present a valid Parents Centre card to receive the discount. www.hrv.co.nz or 0800 HRV 123

DO YOU KNOW OF A LOCAL BUSINESS THAT WOULD LIKE TO BE PART OF OUR MEMBER OFFER PROGRAM? GET IN TOUCH VIA OUR FACEBOOK PAGE.

COMMUNITY DIRECTORY Whakatāne Parents Centre Plunketline Plunket Clinic

027 977 9951 0800 933 922 (07) 308 8454

National Poisons Centre Healthline IRD Child Support

0800 764 766 0800 611 116 0800 221 221

SUPPORT SERVICES

GROUPS & ACTIVITIES

LA LECHE LEAGUE Breastfeeding Café, for advice, support and to meet other mums. Phone Bronwyn ph. 307 7440

MUSIC AND MOVEMENT , WHAKATĀNE Salvation Army Hall, corner King St and Goulstone Rd, Wednesdays at 10am. $1-$2.

WHAKATĀNE COMMUNITY TOY LIBRARY Located at James Street School. Open Tuesdays 10.30-11.30am, Wednesdays and Thursdays 3-4pm and Saturdays 10-11am. Discount for Parents Centre members on new memberships.

MAINLY MUSIC, WHAKATĀNE Baptist Centre, Keepa Rd, Coastlands. Thursdays at 9.30am. $4.

GYMTOTS At EBOP Gymnastics Club, 11 Lovelock St. Phone 07 308 0122 or 022 326 7496 (022 ebopgym)

ST NICHOLAS MUSIC, ŌHOPE St Nicholas Church, by the Four Square in Ōhope. Fridays at 9.30am. Gold coin entry.

SPACE - SUPPORTING PARENTS ALONGSIDE CHILDREN’S EDUCATION Ph 07 308 0273 and leave a message or email ebopspace@gmail.com

BOTTLE FED BABIES (BFBS) Information on sterilisation, feeding and support for parents email bottlefedbabies@hotmail.com. GASTRIC REFLUX ASSOCIATION For the Support of Parents (GRASP) www.cryingoverspiltmilk.co.nz or 0800 380 517 (leave a message with your contact details). STILLBIRTH AND NEONATAL DEATH SUPPORT GROUP (SANDS) A local group supporting families who have experienced stillbirth or the death of a baby. Message their Facebook page. MISCARRIAGE SUPPORT Information for families who need support following a miscarriage. Ph (09) 378 4060. JIGSAW (FORMERLY CHILD ABUSE PREVENTION SERVICES) Helping families put together what’s best for their children. Phone 0800 228 737 or see www.jigsaw.org.nz. MATERNAL MENTAL HEALTH Maternal and Infant Mental Health support. Self-referrals accepted. Ph 306 0470. POST-NATAL DEPLETION GROUP Local support for Post Natal Depression and Anxiety. Search Whakatāne Post Natal Depletion Support Group on Facebook to join.

MAINLY MUSIC, ŌPŌTIKI St Johns Church, St John St, Ōpōtiki Thursdays at 10am. $2. DANCE FFUN STUDIO, WHAKATĀNE Pre-school dance and ballet for 3 to 5 yrs. Call Helen on 021 210 5119. Caledonian Hall, 60 King St. WHAKATĀNE COMMUNITY PLAYGROUP Learning fun for children under 5 at Eastbay REAP Monday to Thursday 9am-1pm. MULTIPLE BIRTH PLAYGROUP For families with twins, triplets and more. Meets first and third Wednesday of the month at St Nicholas Church, Ōhope. For more information call Jules on 308 2586 BOOKABOO STORIES AND SONGS At Whakatāne Library and Exhibition Centre. Tuesdays at 10am. Free. EDUBASE PLAYGROUP Fridays from 9:30-11:30am, Plunket Rooms. Suitable for ages 0-5.

PARENT INC. TOOLBOX Six week courses run for parents. A choice of courses available: 0-6 years, 6-12 years and teenagers. Courses run for 2 hours per week usually in the evenings. Phone Pam 312 4444. HIYOKO JAPANESE PLAYGROUP Tuesdays as a regular session at Mananui Playcentre. WHAKATĀNE BABYWEARERS Hire of slings/carriers available. Contact us on Facebook. PLAYCENTRE BABES Awakeri Playcentre on Mondays from 12.30-3pm. For children Under 2. A supportive place to bring your baby. Contact: awakeri@playcentre. org.nz, Sian on 0274 083 083 or find us on Facebook EDGECUMBE PLAYGROUP Each Thursday during term time 12:30pm - 2:30pm. 51 College Rd, Edgecumbe (next to the church). FREE! Contact Lisa 022 023 9526

HIRE EQUIPMENT TO HIRE THESE ITEMS, CONTACT WHAKATÄ&#x20AC;NE PARENTS CENTRE ON 027 977 9951

MEDELA SYMPHONY HOSPITAL GRADE BREAST PUMPS Top of the line, hospital grade electric breast pump for home and personal use. Ideal for boosting supply, assisting with feeding a sick or premature baby, for long-term pumping, separation situations (sick or working mum) and other scenarios. BOND $50. MEMBERS PRICE $30 PER MONTH* DOUBLE PUMP KIT $10. *Only available to Parents Centre members

MEDELA LACTINA BREAST PUMPS Hospital grade electric breast pumps ideal for long term, regular use. Can be used for long-term pumping, boosting supply, assisting with feeding a sick or premature baby, separation situations (sick or working mum) and other scenarios. BOND $30. MEMBERS PRICE $20 PER MONTH. NON MEMBERS $50 PER MONTH. DOUBLE PUMP KIT $10.

AVENT ISIS BREAST PUMP AND STERILISER KITS Our Avent kit includes an Isis manual breast pump with storage bottles and a microwave steriliser. Simple to use and very cost effective. Great for occasional use. BOND $25. MEMBERS $10 PER MONTH. NON MEMBERS $20 PER MONTH.

JOIN PARENTS CENTRE DO YOU KNOW SOMEONE THAT WOULD LIKE TO JOIN WHAKATĀNE PARENTS CENTRE? We offer… Quality childbirth education classes • Taught by qualified educators with skills in adult teaching Comprehensive parent education courses • Basic First Aid • Baby and You • Toilet Training • Moving and Munching Networks for parents to support and learn • Friendship and support through coffee groups, playgroups • Social events

Services • Library - parenting and children’s books • Local newsletter “Tickles’ and national magazine, KiwiParent, every two months • Breast pumps for hire at very competitive rates Discounts • Local retail discounts • Members discount or free entry to Centre courses and activities • Members discounts on hire equipment

BECOME A PARENTS CENTRE MEMBER TODAY! Join now for only $60 per year or $90 for 2 years (Valid Community Services Card holder = $20/yr). Contact us on 027 977 9951 or email whakatāne@parentscentre.org.nz

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