The WTCS Horseshoe - Winter 2022/23

Cover Art: Eliana Karanxha

Letter From the Editor

Kai Smolin

Welcome readers to the very first issue of our new school newspaper, the Western Tech Horseshoe! My name is Kai Smolin, I’m in grade 11, and I’m one of two editors-in-chief responsible for this paper. (Along with the other orange-haired kid: Theo Boyce) I’m here to talk about the founding of the newspaper team, the origin of the name, and hopefully, share a few cool facts along the way.

I was originally approached about helping start a school newspaper by my English teacher Ms Reeve around October, and just a few weeks later we were having our first meeting in the library lab 4 . Since then, an incredible team has been assembled, and they've worked exceedingly hard to write, edit, and produce this issue for you But let’s rewind a bit, and let me tell you how our newspaper received its name

I mentioned earlier that this is the very first issue of The Horseshoe, and it’s true, but it’s also true that Western had a previous newspaper: The Hidden Agenda The Hidden Agenda was a sparsely released newspaper published between 2007 and 2011, covering mostly politics and school events So that begs the question, why not just revive the old newspaper? There were two answers to this that ultimately led to our decision to start again rather than revive the old club

First, and most obviously: there is no longer a hidden agenda While we aren't sure what nefarious plots were at work at the time to merit such a name, the fact stands that today we are a community of writers, journalists, and creatives. Our purpose is only to express and inform, and although it was a cool name, the first time anyone heard it they would ask “well what is the hidden agenda?” Every. Single. Time.

Secondly, we felt that there was too much change since The Hidden Agenda. We’d changed, Western had changed, and most importantly the world had changed. When I said that The Hidden Agenda covered politics, I wasn’t kidding. The majority of each issue was taken up by students complaining about George Bush or some facet or other of American politics. We had different ideas, and a different vision for The Horseshoe.

That all led us to our second or third meeting in the library, voting on a new name People shouted out a name, and it was written on the board and voted on Options included: The Western Tech Rag (suggested by Mr Berube himself), a rag being a term for a low-quality newspaper and a group of colts, The Anti-Theo Club, and of course, the fateful Horseshoe And here we are, our team has worked tirelessly, through many hours (and many revisions, sorry Oliver), but here it is Please enjoy the very first issue of our school’s new newspaper, The Horseshoe

The Masthead Leadership Team

Editors-In-Chief

Kai Smolin

Theodore Boyce

Submissions Curator

Mae Lai

Deputy Editor

Ciel Nduka

Editorial Team

Arts & Culture Editors

Jakob Boelling

Bimpe Abayomi

News Editors

Aiden Hunter

Julia Story

Sports Editor

Quinn Oliver

Comics & Illustrations Editor

Benny Gyorke-Wong

Puzzles Editor

Joshua Mandel

Promotions Lead

Cody Davis

Brody Rapkowski

Design Team

Design Heads

Eliana Karanxha

Zophine Saitua-Rippell

Where Are All The Aliens?

Mae Lai

Where is everybody?

This was the question posed by Enrique Fermi in 1950, during a casual conversation about UFOs with a group of other physicists. Later, it came to be the root of the Fermi Paradox, which astrophysicist Michael Hart published a detailed examination of in 1975. The argument is this: there are billions of potentially habitable planets in the universe If only 1% of them developed life, and only 1% of those developed intelligent life, there would still be hundreds of billions of intelligent civilizations in the known universe Some of these would surely be millions of years older than humanity is So, given all these facts, why does the universe remain silent?

It’s possible that the vast intelligent civilizations we are searching for are just very rare. In a similar line of thinking, Robin Hanson proposed the Great Filter theory in 1996. It posits that somewhere between the creation of life and the emergence of an interstellar civilization, there is some ‘great filter’, a barrier that very few ever surpass.

so far undetected

This filter could be a biological one: the creation of life in the first place, the evolution of multicellular organisms, or the development of intelligent life. It could also be external: periodic natural disasters wiping out most civilizations. After all, Earth itself has had numerous mass extinction events, and plenty of close calls within human history If any of these are the case, we humans have already passed through the filter, one of the rare few to do so But a more ominous possibility is that the filter lies ahead of us still: a threat of our own creation, or a threat that is

Another possible solution to the paradox is that aliens are simply too alien It’s possible that we have underestimated how different they could be from us, and are therefore not looking for the right things It may be that civilizations quickly outgrow radio emissions in favor of better technology Perhaps we on Earth do not yet have the capability to properly communicate with them. Scientist Alan Stern put forth the idea that there may be many planets with subsurface oceans, where intelligent life could exist hidden from our view. The assumption that extraterrestrial life would think the same way we do should also be called into question. Maybe aliens don’t see the colonization of their galaxy as a goal, or maybe they live on starships rather than planets.

But the simplest answer to the Fermi Paradox is that we just haven’t looked far enough We may be incapable of looking far enough If the history of the univ ar, the ld exis st day

extraterrestrial life Alien civilizations could have come and gone, passing messages to a silent Earth, a million years too early Currently, we can detect signals from only a fraction of the Milky Way, and the Milky Way is only one of hundreds of billions of galaxies It’s like taking a bucket of water from the ocean and wondering why you didn't catch any fish.

"Alien civilizations could have come and gone, passing messages to a silent Earth"

The universe could be teeming with life, or it could be almost empty There could be another civilization millions of light years away, who also look up at the stars and wonder if anyone is out there. We can’t know unless someday, the stars finally respond.

"So, given all these facts, why does the universe remain silent?"

The National Radio Astronomy Observatory Karl G. Jansky Very Large Array

Shop Till Who Drops?

Allyssa Shaw

Recently as I was browsing a mall, window shopping for nothing in particular, I noticed something. A group of teenage girls like myself walked out of a clothing store, displaying many of the newest trends. There were signs plastered in every window of the store, promoting all their new designs This isn’t out of the ordinary at all, but the conversation I heard intrigued me

They talked about all the new things they bought, exclaiming how much money they had spent on clothes they “weren’t gonna use in two weeks time,” laughing These young girls are not the villains in this story, but rather a growing epidemic of fast fashion. Fast fashion is a design and manufacturing system of producing mass amounts of clothing with low quality material, at a rapid pace.

Fast fashion is widely regarded as the most affordable, quickest way to keep up with all the new trends across social media. This affordability isn't inherently negative. In fact, for many people it’s needed, especially with the cost of living and inflation rising at a rapid pace Who doesn’t want to be trendy for cheap? On top of that, it employs over 300 million people! Sounds fantastic, right? but when we break it down, it’s much more nuanced It’s important to consider the cost of fast fashion that goes beyond money

fast fashion 8% of all greenhouse gas emissions globally are a product of fast fashion. Its model is created to cater to new microtrends every week, promoting what? Insane amounts of overconsumption. Not to mention, with social media being integrated into many consumers’ daily lives, there are even more pressures to contribute to this. Especially all over places like TikTok, clothing hauls and outfit designing trends are everywhere. Not only does this promote harmful ideologies for our environment, but it can also cause mental health issues

These low prices also create a standard that does not allow for fair pay to the people who labored making these clothes There are so many factors like pricing of materials, designs, shipping, customs, taxes, photographers, models, labor, and working space which are all skimped out on Specifically and arguably the worst of all, working conditions and pay. This is when the true cost of our fashion and microtrends shine.

factories, the workers aren’t even paid wages but instead tiny sums of money per clothing item produced, like $2.02 per shirt. This pay system heavily encourages overworking, reinforcing these ridiculously long work weeks. These people don’t deserve such treatment, yet there is no out because this is their only means of survival despite the pay being barely livable. None of this is to say that lower income people are keeping these businesses afloat because that is simply not the case The individuals that are having a real impact are the ones buying huge hauls of up to $1,000, which could have easily been used on more sustainable options I personally have struggled with not being able to afford sustainable clothing in my lifetime Still, I have found alternatives that are significantly more sustainable such as thrifting. Buying second hand clothing is not for everybody and has been viewed as taboo in the past, but that doesn’t mean we have to keep it that way. It reduces the amount of clothes ending up in landfills, and promotes reusing and upcycling. We can remove the stigma by normalizing sustainable practices, and lessen our carbon footprints. And for those fortunate enough to be able to shop sustainably, should. If thrifting is not something you enjoy, you can still shop firsthand and when your clothes get worn down or go out of style, you can upcycle or donate them

It’s clear that a main repercussion of fast fashion is the environmental damage 11 3 million tonnes of clothes are thrown out each year in the U S alone, and a huge contributor to this incredibly high number is waste from

Shein is one of the major companies perpetuating fast fashion. Shein is notorious not only for jumping on microtrends and abusing them to their fullest potential, but also for its foul working conditions. These conditions are largely why the clothes can actually be

We need to do what we can to minimize the negative effects of fast fashion, and push for meaningful change within major industries The environment cannot save itself when we continue to push it to its limit The exploited workforce of these fast fashion brands do not have the means to fight for themselves, but we do. We can help make the world a better place not only for us, but for our future. Next time you’re facing an impulse to buy clothes you don't need, remember who’s dropping at the “low” cost of your shopping.

"These young girls are not the villains in this story, but rather a growing epidemic of fast fashion."

Discarded clothes in Chile's Atacama Desert

Catching Up with WARP7

Robin Lewis

Fresh off the heels of a chaotic 2022, Western Tech’s robotics team WARP7 returned to school this fall to begin preparing for our next season, which starts in early January. Offseason is a time where instead of building new robots, we focus on training new members, taking on team projects, and participating in community events. Offseason also helps older members get used to their new roles, something I’ve found myself grateful for as one of our co-captains this year

The offseason was formally kicked off at our introduction meeting in September, where many of our new members first joined the team With dozens of new members on the team and many of our leaders in new roles, we began to teach and train members throughout the team Another key part of the fall is attending offseason competitions. As a team, we try to attend one offseason competition each year to train new members, get experience, and enjoy the atmosphere of competition without the pressure of our district ranking being affected. At the end of October this year, we competed at the STEMley Cup in Hamilton. In the weeks leading up to STEMley, we began to focus on working on our 2022 robot: Avro, to ensure it was repaired and ready to compete But the day before the competition, our climber broke Despite the robot’s most competitive mechanism now being broken, the team wasn’t upset As soon as a minute after the climber broke, we were constantly cracking jokes and coming up with ways to decorate our now-broken climber In the end, we fitted two small Canadian flags to the portion of the climber that was still working, giving our robot the ability to show its patriotism by waving them. After packing up all of our equipment,

the team was still in good spirits and ready for the next day

And so, at 7:00 am, we all showed up to STEMley, the sky still dark despite us having driven an hour. You could instantly feel the atmosphere of the competition, with most teams competing for the first time since at least April. While we were all in high spirits, our qualification matches were rough. After dealing with numerous robot issues, we ended qualifications 20th out of 24 teams. However, our low ranking meant we were one of the last teams to be picked at alliance selection, and so we ended up on the second-seeded playoff alliance with teams 1114 “Simbotics” and 4476 “W A F F L E S” With a set alliance and drive team for playoffs, this was when our day started going really well That afternoon also brought a lot of joy for me, as it was one of the first times I truly felt myself getting used to my role as co-captain by helping lead the team and make sure everything was running smoothly. We didn’t exactly know what to expect from the playoffs at first, but as the afternoon went on, we kept winning matches and advancing further in the competition.

Suddenly, we found ourselves in the finals.

When we won the match that got us there, I was overjoyed. After breaking our he bot ed our ely car als alli

closer than we predicted, and we’d already gotten much more out of that day than we expected I left STEMley that evening with a little finalists’ trophy in my hand and a sense of pride in what we were able to accomplish.

After STEMley, our focus shifted back to training new members and taking on offseason projects. From building special drivetrains and a new robot cart, to running a LEGO robotics competition and a mock kickoff, and cleaning up our shop (...several times), WARP7 has kept busy during our offseason. Now in lateDecember, we’re making our final preparations for kickoff in January by streamlining how we run the team and wrapping up our projects Once the onseason begins, we’ll have just under two months to design, manufacture, and assemble our robot before bringing it to competition Our first two competitions, in Barrie and North Bay, are scheduled to take place in early and late March respectively

While we look forward to the season, the end of the fall gives us an opportunity to look back on the last few months. Our offseason wasn’t perfect, but as a team, we have a lot to be proud of. We finished several key projects, made it to finals at STEMley, and trained what’s likely our biggest group of new members since my grade 9 year. We have an amazing group of rookies and leaders alike, and I can’t wait to see what the 2023 season has in store for us. Now we can take the winter break to rest and charge up for the onseason grind

WARP7 team photo at the STEMley Cup in October, where we were finalists

Ringing

Kai Glaisek

ringing.

the roars of the unforgiving high brave do i, through your sibylline sneer such has it been since my first cry; but asking why only incites my tear.

to drown this would be keen, pulling you down and under; hoping for your clarity of scene; obscene may it be, desperate to be asunder.

silence eludes me, like grasping for smoke; despite all the hope, it will never succeed. pitiless, the sound splits me broke; you’ll only wish we could cede

heartless it feels to be put in this place, on chase by you, your everlasting game; i’ll never escape the beat of my bass; no matter the space, you remain the same

and remain we shall, you are my consistency; persistency your nature, default as it may.

so content i’ll live with this ringing; like so many leftover bombshells, singing, everlasting; never-ending, ringing.

Feminism remains a relevant topic in the 21st century. Throughout time, people have used trends, books, movies, and music as avenues to express their feminist ideas. A great example of this is Legally Blonde, an inspirational movie that not only breaks stereotypes, but also promotes the idea of self expression and how one shouldn’t be ashamed of themselves

Legally Blonde is a movie about Elle Woods, a stereotypical dumb blonde whose only apparent goal is for her boyfriend to propose to her Elle’s focus throughout her first year of college is fashion design and merchandising Unexpectedly, her boyfriend breaks up with her, and Elle is heartbroken The only reasoning he gives her is that he needs to focus on his education and career, and that she is only a distraction. Elle decides that her only option is to follow him, the man of her dreams, to Harvard where he’s studying. The movie tackles the themes of defying other’s opinions, learning about self expression, and following your dreams, even if they

are different from what you originally planned

I would highly recommend watching Legally Blonde. Even if you think Elle isn’t a relatable character at first, you’ll soon realize that she represents so many different types of people. Throughout the movie she constantly defies stereotypes, flourishes in every environment and shows that she can be very quick witted. Along the way, Elle not only learns to live for herself, but helps others find themselves. The realization that you don’t need someone to complete your life is a difficult idea to think about Being able to acknowledge this is an achievement in itself, but is absolutely necessary One of the things humanity is great at is putting people into groups, and the best part about Legally Blonde is that Elle shows how little the opinions of others matter because in the end, nothing really matters so you should just be the person you want to be

Final rating: 5/5 horseshoes

Why Legally Blonde is still relevant

Olivia Figueiredo

Elle and Bruiser in Legally Blonde

2022 - A Musical Year In Review

Owen Ois

2022 was an interesting year for music. No single album was definitive, but each one present on this list feels special. Here’s a look at 4 of the most notable albums released in 2022.

black midi

- Hellfire

Kicking off the four is black midi’s Hellfire. On their 3rd studio album, the British rock/jazz outfit are in prime form. According to an interview the group did with UNCUT, they pulled from influences like Tom Petty’s Live at the Fillmore as well as Charles Mingus and Neil Young’s collaboration with Crazy Horse, World Record. The product of this rich tapestry of influences is a jazzy prog-rock epic that moves violently from calm and composed to loud and unwieldy

Songs like Dangerous Liaisons begin the story of killing a man, set to a minimalist free-jazz As the story escalates, so does the production The song climaxes with the singer wailing over a thrashing instrumental that feels like it's throwing you against a wall The story of Eat Men Eat is hard to follow in the song, the music videos help paint a clear picture, telling the tale of a captain who poisons his crew Eat Men Eat follows the same format as Dangerous Liaisons, starting small and building to an earth-shattering climax

Hellfire is great and deserves more hype than it has received It is very worth a listen if you’re a fan of prog-rock, free jazz or just want to expand your musical horizons

Taylor Swift - Midnights

“I have this thing where I get older but never wiser” is the opening line to AntiHero on Taylor Swift’s Midnights, and it does a better job explaining this album than anyone ever could Despite

being Taylor Swift’s 10th album, 12th if you include the re-recordings, Midnights is her least interesting The more mature production present on her last two records is gone, replaced by minimalist production that feels more skeletal and incomplete than anything else. The lyrics have also taken a major step down. While early Swift albums could feel juvenile in their themes and lyrics, they at least shined in specificity and storytelling, and were more justified in them being written by a 16 year old. On Midnights, Swift explores nothing beyond the surface level, rendering the stories she tells as generic. A song like Lavender Haze is bursting with potential, telling the story of trying to get over and forget her past for the sake of her new relationship, though all this potential is squandered when Swift throws a bunch of stuff at the wall, expecting something to stick The titular “Lavender Haze” is never explained whatsoever On the 4th track, Snow On The Beach featuring Lana Del Ray, the lyrics get even worse It’s jam-packed with lines like “Snow on the beach, weird but f***in’ beautiful” which feel like they were written by a fak

old

tryi

stands out against others on the album Anti-Hero serves as proof that there were good ideas going into this, and by proxy just makes the rest of the album more disappointing. If you’re a huge fan of Taylor Swift, you will probably get something out of this album. Otherwise, it isn’t worth listening to.

Kendrick Lamar - Mr. Morale and the Big Steppers

You can’t talk about notable releases of 2022 without Mentioning Kendrick Lamar’s Mr. Morale And The Big Steppers. Above all else, MMATBS is frustrating. Gone are the radio-friendly pop rap affectations of DAMN, gone is the rewarding and straightforward concept of TPAB and in are the tracks of theatrical domestic disputes and homophobic slurs There were genuinely good intentions going into this project The track United In Grief sees Lamar reckoning with his coping mechanisms and taking a step back to see how harmful they are, with some very interesting and minimalistic piano lead production that transitions to a more standard hip-hop beat, that then brings the same piano back for the last minute. The aforementioned horny argument concerto makes the smart choice of giving the guest spot to actress Taylour Paige rather than another rapper, giving the track a heart and sense of

Kendrick Lamar preforming at the 2016 Grammys

showmanship that may not have been possible otherwise All that being said, the album is held back by a messy lack of cohesion and some poor execution

Spotify. In spite of that , Lac known in the mainstream. H changed with the release of h album and the Tiktok tidal wa generated

Auntie Diaries has become the album's most infamous example of that second phenomenon. The intention going in was to see Lamar slowly gain an understanding and respect for his transitioning loved one, but the perspective of this newer, more “woke” Lamar is never explored far enough to justify the negative one Another weird and flawed choice was Lamar's Inclusion of Kodak Black, a convicted abuser and overall bad guy Lamar justifies this feature on Savior, explaining that he sees himself in Kodak While that logic tracks in a way, it doesn’t justify giving him this completely undeserved spotlight

A once in a generation artist like Kendrick Lamar will never make a bad album. This isn’t his Lulu or his Rebirth, it’s his The King Of Limbs; frustrating, complex, fearlessly experimental, highly anticipated, and disappointing.

Steve Lacy - Gemini Rights

Last on this list is Steve Lacy’s Tiktok darling, Gemini Rights. After a career like his, starting out producing beats on his iPhone, transitioning to being a member of The Internet and then producing instrumentals for some of the most acclaimed works of the last decade, it was about time Lacey Got his proper big break Lacy has been very successful for a number of years His song Dark Red has nearly a billion streams on

Gemini Rights is an alterna album with a funky pop twist, m distinctive sonic cues of his o with those of Earth, Wind & Tame Impala The best sho these influences melding to Helmet, which sees Steve mediocre partner with a baseline that earns its strong p the mix, and some of his most i guitar playing yet One rarely m detail of the album as a who toxic it is, and that is by no critique The opener Static is r its dissection of who can assumed to be Steve’s ex. “Hope you find peace for you boyfriend ain’t gon’ fill the v delightfully destructive and p theme continues on tracks lik and Cody freestyle, the latt some standout lines.

The album's most popular t Habit is probably more worth d for the cultural impact and surrounding it than as independently. The Tiktok-ifi music, Steve Lacy lashing out ignorant to the rest of his di and even to the rest of the song, and the impact it may have on Steve’s career going forward are all notable cultural events that deserve their own article How is the song itself? Solid The lowfidelity female vocal transitioning to the actual song in the first couple seconds is a great production detail Bad Habit is a pretty good song that will in all likelihood be forgotten in a few months. Gemini Rights is a lean and constantly engaging listen. While its instinct to be as he rec un for

Steve Lacy may not be doing anything groundbreaking here, but it's good for what it is

2022 was weird Some of the most successful and culturally significant artists of all time dropped albums, and nothing stuck; nothing was monumental. 2022 didn’t have an Old Town Road or a Despacito, it didn’t have a Nevermind; it didn’t even have a Sour. What 2022 did have were some interesting albums, some short lived fads, and a lot of fun.

"Gone are the radiofriendly pop rap affectations of DAMN, gone is the rewarding and straight forward concept of TPAB and in are the tracks of theatrical domestic disputes and homophobic slurs."

Steve Lacy, photographed by Tom Kneller

The Banshees of Inisherin Reviewed

Oliver Principe-Beer

If I could describe the story of The Banshees of Inisherin in one word, it would be human Not a story about flying men in robot suits, or some sort of global mafioso conspiracy; these are two men coming to ruin for all too mortal reasons

Banshees follows old friends Patrick and Colm (played by Colin Farrell and Brendan Gleeson respectively) on Inisherin, an isle off the coast of Ireland. Early in the film, Colm decides that his life is running out and he can no longer afford to be friends with Patrick, who he now finds dull. Colm is a talented fiddler who wants to work on his compositions prior to his death. Since this is an island of fewer than five hundred people, Patrick is distraught. Who will he go to the pub with now?

The film is set during the Irish Civil War in 1923, a conflict flaring up in the background of the film in step with Patrick and Colm’s dispute The feud is fueled by what some would call Irish stoicism, others Irish stubbornness As Patrick continues to harrass Colm for companionship, an ultimatum is delivered: “Every time you talk to me, I’ll cut off one of my fingers and deliver it to your door ” The gruesome threat abruptly shifts the tone of their fight from a comedic spat between two old men to a heartbreaking spiral of rage and despair.

Everyone on screen shifts seamlessly into their roles to compose my personal favourite ensemble cast this year. Other films may have better direction or a smidge more cohesiveness, but I personally think that Banshees is definitely the best-acted film of the year. Gleeson and Farell steal the show, if there is anything less than an Oscar for Best Actor and Best Supporting Actor for the two of them, I will be distraught I doubt there is anyone more selfloathing than those on a remote island

The isolation, the irrelevance, and the sheer loneliness take a toll on any individual, as exemplified in the film The two protagonists are as opposed as can be, they bond through their selfloathing. This shines in the bittersweet moments of kindness between the estranged duo, which are all the more beautiful against the crippling solitude of Inisherin.

The film wraps up in a surreal sequence where the two men, who at this point have lost everything to each other’s efforts, stand on a beach and talk. I’ll say less to make sure that nothing is spoiled, the real nature of the story comes together at the last possible moment Every single piece of the story centres around the mundane core of two homely Irish men in the wake of a massive argument It’s a heartbreaking study of friendship that will leave even the most loyal questioning their relationships with those closest to them

I would rate this film 4.5 Horseshoes out of 5.

Me & Mr. Cigar Reviewed

Cody Davis

In my opinion, there is no connection between animal and human that is as strong as the bond between a boy and his dog We see it in many shows and books, from old ones such as Old Yeller and Where the Red Fern Grows to more modern media like Peanuts and Adventure Time. It's even referenced in the age-old phrase “man's best friend”. Me & Mr. Cigar by Gibby Haynes is one of many stories that revolve around this bond, intertwining it with the complexities of human relationships and the meaning of family.

The book follows a young man named Oscar and his clairvoyant dog, Mr Cigar Mr Cigar is a fantastical creature and an even better companion He uses his magical abilities to aid in Oscar’s misadventures and deliver him marijuana Oscar attempts to navigate his newly reached adulthood through rural Texas, delving into drugs, parties, and oyment at the mysterious IBC Corp: al company working to develop new innovative technology. One day, r receives a frantic call from his nged sister, Rachel. Rachel is a us artist who informs him that she’s g held hostage after failing to pay a sum of money. On the same day, ar learns that there are ‘nefarious

Colm and Patrick discuss their friendship

forces’ after his dog, leading the two and their friend Lytle on a trip from Texas to New York City to rescue Rachel Me & Mr Cigar is as funny as it is touching While the book is largely comedic, it manages to explore the complexities of human relationships, personal identity, and the bond between a boy and his dog. It uses dark humour as it's main attractor, telling the story of a wayward young adult and the unique characters around him.

Overall, it’s a fun read. It's not suitable for anyone that prides themselves on only reading works for intellectuals, or those who enjoy simple start-to-finish stories that are easy to understand. If you’re a fan of nonsensical fun with an overarching plot that’s still serious, then this is the book for you

Things to watch out for:

A general warning should be made that a large part of the book does revolve around drug abuse It's not the main plot of the book, but the main character is frequently under the influence There is also some violent content throughout the story, it's mildly graphic but nothing too extreme, unless you're squeamish. A couple of derogatory terms are used, but aren't glorified and in one instance are actually important to a character's development.

Babylon Reviewed

Theodore Boyce

Total Rating: I would rate Me & Mr. Cigar 4 horseshoes out of 5. The story itself is great, but it took me a little while to understand the plot

I saw Damien Chazelle’s latest film, Babylon, in a movie theatre Before the film began, I was twice assured via prerecorded video, once by Avatar mastermind and blockbuster royalty James Cameron and once by Chazelle himself, that this was where I should be: the theatre This was where they meant for their works to be seen Both also made a point of referencing the packed crowd I would be sitting with, a packed crowd that in reality only consisted of me, my dad, and an elderly couple. Babylon cost an estimated $80 million US to make. As of writing this it has grossed about $10 million. Taking into consideration the mammoth promotional spending, Babylon would have to gross $250 million just to break even. It is one of the worst studio flops of the century. Chazelle has one of the most bizarre careers of the last fifteen years. In 2013 he got studio money to make an 18minute long short about the destructive relationship between a jazz drummer and his instructor called Whiplash. A year later he turned Whiplash into a feature film. It cost $3.3m and ended up grossing over $50m worldwide. After Whiplash he made La La Land, a throwback musical about finding and losing love in Los Angeles. La La Land was a smash hit and grossed nearly half a billion dollars worldwide on a $30m budget In 2018 he put out a Neil Armstrong biopic titled First Man. It was produced on a $59m budget and made just over $100m, modest compared to La La Land, but not a flop by any means

He has become the epitome of a 21st century ‘blank check’ filmmaker (so he to ey wa ly, und en cro

win Oscars Up until Babylon, they had The film begins in 1920s Hollywood and follows three central characters: an up-and-coming actress played by Margot Robbie, a young producer and executive rising through the ranks of Hollywood played by Diego Calva, and an old guard silent film star played by Brad Pitt. It is notable that this is essentially Calva’s breakout role, and although there are technically three leads, he plays the definite protagonist.

Babylon’s first major scene is a party. Everybody is wearing barely any clothes, people are stuffing their faces full of narcotics, and the music can barely surface in an ocean of laughter and chatter It teems with spectacle The camera makes flashy movements as it flows from spectacle to spectacle which include but are not limited to: a loose elephant, a small man jumping on a large, suggestively shaped pogo stick, copious amounts of drug consumption and ecstatic dancing At one point the camera sails by a dance party that has morphed into a full on bacchanal Another important piece of information: Babylon is three hours long. Not “three hours” as in two and a half hours rounded up. It is over THREE hours long. One hundred and eighty nine minutes to be exact.

Front cover of Me & Mr. Cigar

Margot Robbie in Babylon

There are countless unmemorable, peripheral characters in Babylon. There are a lot of tropes, the most obvious of which is the cynical critic and embodiment of evil that every auteur filmmaker seems to think their movie needs. The critic is one of many ways Chazele shows insecurity Peppered throughout are long-winded speeches about how important cinema is, not a stone’s throw from the speech one might use when justifying their choice to make movies to their parents The film seems like it’s going to end seven times in its final half hour, because Chazelle keeps putting on more and more buttons to summarize and wrap up what he has been trying to say They get so obvious he might as well have just shot a five minute video of himself explaining his script’s themes and messaging. The strangest one of these buttons is a montage of film history like something you’d watch during the Oscars. Notable inclusions in this montage are TRON and Avatar, which feel extremely jarring to see after two and a half hours of immaculate period-accurate production design. The montage has a distinct unprofessionalism to it, like the intro of a shaggy video essay a film student uploads to YoutTube to prove their movie cred.

Whiplash, La La Land, and to an extent First Man, have all been criticized for their excessive use of style and an arguable lack of substance. A very clear insecurity with this criticism lies deep within Babylon, which attempts to justify itself purely through style. Its eccentric opening sequence sets the tone, and for most of the runtime it does more of the same It is mostly kept afloat by two things: Its gorgeous aesthetic value, and its stars’ gravitas Babylon’s budget shows up in every frame The costumes and sets are fantastic and beautifully lit The cinematography is vibrant, hazy, and stunning Babylon feels like an expensive movie

The second centerpiece is the performances, namely the star roles. Pitt and Robbie are movie stars. They steal every scene, even if they lack nuance, it's unimportant in the face of how captivating they are to watch Having them play movie-stars allows them to fully indulge in the hamfisted appeal of a classical Hollywood star, and it’s wonderful

Visuals and charming leads are firmly in the “style” half of the style/substance scale, but when watching a coked-out fever dream that barely constitutes a movie but a stream of consciousness, it doesn't matter. When Babylon stuffs substance and embraces style, it triumphs. This manic euphoria, however, is not sustained throughout the film. One of my biggest gripes is Chazelle’s nagging desire to make Babylon a Hollywood Movie with a traditional plot, something it should avoid by any means necessary.

to: a loose crocodile, murder with a spiked club, nude women cage-fighting, and a naked bodybuilder eating live rats. The slog of violence and pain is a clever perversion of the breakneck-paced party from earlier in the film It’s a standout scene and a return to form, but unfortunately just an echo of what a more daring movie could have been

Across its three hours Babylon almost precisely splits into three hour-long acts. Its structure is extremely standard and it suffers accordingly. Chazelle wants to present an insane frenzy of unimaginable excess but is distracted by mundane Hollywood formula. The closest it gets to the splendor of the opening party is the portrayal of another function twenty years later in the third act. James McKay (played by Toby Maguire) leads two of the protagonists into an underground lair he calls the “asshole of Los Angeles ” In the dark tunnel leading inside McKay rambles about how people don’t party like uts on ver bec ay occ d

Although Babylon definitely doesn't need to be as long as it is, in a way I think it should be The runtime builds the mythos of this obscene studio disaster Without it, Babylon would just be any movie Love it or hate it, it’s something special During the party-dungeon scene McKay tells the protagonists “it has to be seen to be believed”, and it’s true No matter how much I can put the film to page, nothing will capture the real thing Even if I think the film is messy and lacks thematic depth, I urge you to see it. Babylon is not a good movie, but it is certainly a great time at the movies. Find some willing friends, go to the busiest show you can find, let James Cameron tell you through his cold sleepless eyes that this is where you are meant to be, eat some popcorn, and see for yourself.

I abstain from giving a rating.

"It is mostly kept afloat by two things: Its gorgeous aesthetic value, and its stars’ gravitas."

"Chazelle wants to present an insane frenzy of unimaginable excess but is distracted by mundane Hollywood formula."

The Everlasting Constant

Julia Story

Alike the reset of morrow, The sizzling of fireworks

The shrill of alarms

Mark a thousand beginnings

The leviathan thought That time never waits

Comforts through the moons

As you anticipate the suns

Every day of repentance

Each rotation anew

Drapes a blanket of promise

Over weary eyes

There will always be something to stay for Happy New Year!

Fumbling Our Future

A few days ago I was listening to the news. The story was about concussions and Tua Tagovailoa, an NFL player who had just suffered two severe concussions. The injury sent him to the ER. This got me thinking about the people that I know who play football and whether or not high schools should have a football team.

For decades, football has been a very popular sport within high school communities At my high school, Western Tech, it has been ingrained into the school's culture Many people in my classes love to play, and have devoted large portions of their time to practicing and travelling to games; for many, it’s become part of our school's identity, but at what cost?

Football can give some young athletes opportunities Lessons about

determination and discipline can be learned through the sport, but those lessons don’t only come from football There are many other, far safer sports you can take part in at school. Some football athletes may earn scholarships or even the chance to play professionally. That being said, students have a much higher chance of succeeding academically than through sports. Only 6.5% of high school students play football in college and 1.2% of college-level athletes are drafted into the NFL. You have a 0.00075% chance of playing in the NFL, yet a 20% chance of suffering severe head trauma if you play football Why do schools encourage students to take this risk? Instead, they should focus their energy on safer and more productive activities "Why do schools encourage students to take this risk?"

Previously, we knew very little about the risks that come with playing football but now we have extensive knowledge Countless studies have demonstrated the high risk of head injuries and how dangerous it is for young players. According to the National Library of Medicine, 40.5% of school sports-related concussions in the United States resulted from participation in football. This clearly makes football the most concussion-prone sport.

Helmets do protect a player from certain injuries, such as skull fractures, however, repeated blows to the head can lead to Chronic Traumatic Encephalopathy (CTE) The symptoms of this untreatable degenerative brain disease range from memory loss to progressive dementia, depression and risk of suicide Researchers from Boston University and the Concussion Legacy Foundation have been autopsying the brains of people who have suffered rep es

With the risks of such a negative outcome being so high, how can this be justified? How can this contribute to a learning environment? It doesn't Football, an activity known to significantly impair cognitive function in so many participants, should not be sponsored by schools. Schools also shouldn't support, enable, or promote actions that directly conflict with their educational objectives. One-fourth of football players find that their ability to benefit from what occurs in the classroom is decreased by what occurs out on the field. It’s a great irony for schools to have a program that directly inhibits their students' ability to learn. My brother, currently in middle school, wants to play football when he gets to high school My parents are strongly opposed to it, and I agree with them I really care about him, and couldn’t bear to see him get injured He has a bright future and I don’t want to see that taken away from him, especially when it is something that the removal of these unsafe programs can easily prevent Regardless of how popular tackle football may be, there is no reason for exposing students to its inherent dangers. School administrators are largely responsible for harm to students caused by these risks, and it is up to them to remove these risks by ending the programs.

Zophine Saitua-Rippell

A football

Why I Play

Musa Kamara

Sports are truly one of the most special things that us as human beings have created. To me, playing sports has deeper meaning beyond being a way to have fun or to stay active. To play a sport is a contract, an obligation to give yourself to the game. To me, sports is almost like theatre; in which all the players are performers, and every game is a story being told through the players. The key difference is that neither the performers nor the audience know the script, you simply have to let the story unfold Like in any narrative, sports can write tales of heroic triumphs, just as it can exhibit crushing defeats

With no script, it’s only fair that both sides believe themselves to be the protagonists You and your teammates, all vital to the story, play roles of varying importance. Some change the flow of the story entirely, while others accept the fate drawn up by opponents. Like characters in any story, you develop over time, growing more nuanced and dynamic. Anyone can be the hero of their story, and anyone can be seen as the villain in someone else's. I play to be someone’s hero. You can read about it in as many books as you want or see it happen in any kind of movie, but nothing compares to the raw emotion that captures your soul when you realize your actions directly impacted the story and inspired real change In a split second, you can completely change the narrative and give your teammates hope To have that chance to give someone faith in the team, to make them believe in themselves and thus believe in you, it’s very much like the actions of a real-life super hero It's for those moments that leave lasting impressions on your teammates and change the attitude of the team, inspiring more heroes to step up, is why I play.

Q:

Dear Colton

Dear Colton. I just moved to this school and I don't know how to make friends! Do you have any advice?

A: Making new friends in an unknown place sounds like a very hard task but is relatively easy if you are willing to put yourself out there The biggest thing I would recommend is to talk to the people around you. I have made countless friends from just starting conversations with the people I sit next to in class. I would also recommend going to clubs and sports that you are interested in. This will let you meet new people who have the same interests as you.

Q:

Dear Colton. How do I explain to my dad that I'm trying my best, even if my grades don't show it?

A: I can relate to this, and I’d say the best choice of action is to just have a talk with him. It’s normal to feel pressure from parents, and it’s also normal to feel like you’re not good enough in their eyes. But it’s always important to communicate how you feel. Explain to your dad how you feel, and how you’re trying your best. I’m sure if he’s reasonable he’ll understand. And if it’s possible, try to also show him you’re doing your best? Your parents should always be there to support you, no matter how good your grades are

Q:

Dear Colton. I'm really struggling in math class and I find it so hard to focus or study.

A: One of the things that helps me focus or study is music. It really helps me to not get distracted by social media or video games. Another useful tool is time blocking. Set specific points in the day when you are only going to do your math - it can even be for as little time as 30 minutes - and then set aside a block of time for fun stuff. Once you start getting into the work, it gets pretty hard to stop.

Q:

Dear Colton. There's a girl in a some of my classes who I really like, but I don't want to ruin our friendship and I don't know how to tell her, what do I do?

A: If you think the time is right, just go for it. If she makes fun of you or thinks of you in any different way, I don’t think she was worth it in the first place. Try to be genuine with your feelings and not to respond or say yes, just let things go s any less of you, it wasn't meant to be.

Hot Takes! with Brody Rapkowski

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ART SUBMISSIONS

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