Wairarapa’s locally owned community newspaper
WEDNESDAY, OCTOBER 23, 2019
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Suffering in silence The heartbreak of losing an unborn baby Hayley Gastmeier
Alix Cooper, of Masterton, holding her friend’s grandson, Harry Prior. PHOTO/SUPPLIED
Masterton’s Alix Cooper has experienced the indescribable heartache of miscarrying not once, but four times. It was at between eight and 12 weeks with each pregnancy that Alix lost her unborn babies and with each one, her hopes and dreams of becoming a mother slipped further from her reach. Having had a dysfunctional upbringing in which she never knew her father, starting her own family was all Alix wanted. She was happily married and in her midthirties when she first fell pregnant. “I knew for the longest time that I wanted to be a mother. I had so much love to give that I never got myself. “Finally, I could create this family I never had. “The day I found out I was pregnant I was just
I was completely and utterly devastated. It’s one of those things, if you haven’t been through it you can’t describe the pain you’re feeling. ecstatic – my dreams had come true. “Starting a family was profoundly important to me – I didn’t grow up with your typical cookiecutter childhood.” Alix’s father left before she was born, never to be seen or heard from again. Following this, her mother, pregnant with Alix, left England and sailed to New Zealand with her four-year-old son. Alix’s mother was battling mental illness and finding it hard to cope alone in a foreign country, so she sent Alix’s 12-year-old brother to live at Epuni Boys’ Home in Wellington. Aged eight at the time, Alix was “crushed at the separation” and
she and her brother, David Cohen, now an internationally published writer and journalist, haven't reunited. At an early age, Alix took to the streets and into her teenage years she faced other hardships. Like many women, Alix was keeping the news of her pregnancy quiet until the 12-week mark. Working as an interior decorator, she planned the baby’s nursery and bought clothing in anticipation for her new arrival. It didn’t take long to fall head over heels in love with the baby growing inside her, she said. “But then that dreaded day came.” Alix experienced bleeding and excruciating pain and a scan revealed she had miscarried. “I was completely and utterly devastated. “It’s one of those things, if you haven’t been through it you can’t Continued on page 4
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