BUILDING HEALTHY RELATIONSHIPS WITH YOUR IN-LAWS

BY Aradhana Thakor

Does it feel like you are in a war zone or battlefield each time you are in the presence of your in-laws? You’re not alone! And It's about to change. That's right, get ready, for a change is coming in Jesus' name. Having stepped into an arranged marriage by faith and being happily married for a decade now, the Lord has unfolded His precious pearls along my way. And what a journey it has been! I've stumbled, fallen, wept, rebelled, whined, and questioned. Each time He embraced me with His healing touch upon my aching heart. There He refreshed me with His anointed dewdrops from heaven.

The most important lesson the Lord has taught me is this, “The battle is the Lord's. " King Solomon, one of the wisest men in history wrote, "Keep your heart with all diligence, For out of it spring the issues of life. ” (Proverbs 4:23 NKJV).

He definitely knew what he was talking about, for he had 700 wives and therefore we can assume 700 mother-inlaws! When Jesus reigns in your heart, worldly issues like hate, anger and resentment melt at His feet. Solomon asked God to give him wisdom and an understanding heart. You can ask God too. “And God gave Solomon wisdom and exceedingly great understanding, and largeness of heart like the sand on the seashore. ” (1 Kings 4:29 NKJV). I love how the Lord gave him largeness of heart. This heart makes you accommodating and willing to bear each other's faults. You become sensitive to the slightest nudge of The Holy Spirit.

You can receive His guidance and freely flow with His leading into any situation. We are simply to receive His abundance of grace to reign over every situation. “For if by the one man’s offense death reigned through the one, much more those who receive abundance of grace and of the gift of righteousness will reign in life through the One, Jesus Christ. " (Romans 5:17 NKJV).

Your posture should be,

" Lord, I depend and rely on your continuous supply of grace for this day. The battle is yours. " Sounds too simple, right? The Lord has made it easy for us, but we make it difficult. When you’re in the heat of the battle, you strive so hard to gather all your willpower and self control to not get angry even though you feel like you could punch someone. You try so hard to be poised when deep down you want to lash out. Just hand over the reins to Jesus and let Him fight for you. The first time I found the courage to hand over the reins to Jesus, I stepped onto the battlefield without my war paint on, so to speak, and guess what? The battle was no longer a battle. Everything went smoothly and the evening turned out to be a very pleasant affair.

Always remember, you have been made into the image of Christ. You are the righteousness of God in Christ. You are not a doormat to be walked upon. You are a vessel of honor for Christ. Christ lives in you. You have every right to defend your standing in Christ. At times, the nudge of the Holy Spirit will be so great, you can't help but defend or speak up when you’re wronged or mistreated. When you flow with His grace, He gives you the right words at the right time. At times, He may simply direct you to remain silent. Friend, anchor your heart in Jesus and He will carry you safely through the storms of life. Guard your heart with all diligence in Christ Jesus.

God in His infinite wisdom has great plans for you. Before you were even born, He planned well in advance who you would be surrounded with on this earth and who your friends and family would be. Your in-laws have been divinely appointed and placed in your life. They each serve a purpose in your life.

That person who constantly belittles or criticizes you or the one who thinks your not good enough for their son/daughter, have all been masterfully placed in your life by the infinite wisdom of God. I remember a time when I was verbally hurt by my inlaw, and I was deeply offended. It took quite a while for me to forget the event, but the Lord kept telling me to forgive. I rebelled in my heart as it felt so unfair. After much turmoil, the Lord helped me see things differently. He let my anger simmer down and helped me to pray sincerely for that person's well being and as a result, I was able to forgive. The peace that has followed since then is tremendous. There was no invisible wall as I started to feel a genuine warmth towards that person.

Over the years, the Lord has taught me valuable lessons through my in-laws. He keeps using them to produce the fruits of the Holy Spirit in my heart. I have learned to be patient with people who do not see eye to eye with me. The toughest of all, He has taught me to forgive and pray for those who hurt me. He has skillfully placed your in-laws in your life. They each serve a divine purpose. Let us lift them up in prayer so we may receive all the blessings the Lord graciously bestowed on us.

Prayers That Heal The Heart

Father in the name of Jesus. I thank You for the in-laws which You have given to me. I pray that our relationship would always be one which is led by You and based on Your word. Thank you for the strength and ability to have the right heart as a daughter in-law to them. In Jesus ' might name.

AMEN!

MAINTAIN THE RIGHT RELATIONSHIP WITH IN-LAWS