Valley Voice December 2017

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December 2017 . Issue 6.12

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Steamboat Springs Hayden Oak Creek Yampa

Happy Holidays Photo by Karen Vail

December 2017

Valley Voice

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Mon.- Fri. 9-6 Sat. 9-5 Sun. 11-3






In Central Park Plaza

Green River Basin





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Yampa River Basin




May You Have the Purr-fect Holiday Season


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Happy Holidays to you and your family from

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White River Basin




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GOALS AND MEASURABLE OUTCOMES FROM THE YAMPA-WHITE-GREEN (YWG) RIVER BASIN BASIN IMPLEMENTATION PLAN Protect the YWG Basin from the Colorado River Compact curtailment of existing decreed water uses and some increment of future uses.


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Valley Voice

December 2017


Contents 2017 Without Band-Aids or Therapists

Page 4

Is Steamboat a Special Snowflake?

Page 5

“Just One of The Boys”

Page 6

Holiday Budgeting Realities

Page 7

I Got Rhythm, You Got Rhythm

Page 8

By Matt Scharf

By Scott L. Ford

By Marianne Capra By Scott L. Ford By Karen Vail

Lost and Found: The Baby Blanket

Page 10

The Gift of Giving

Page 11

The Feel Good

Page 12

Calendar of Free Events

Page 17

First Friday Artwalk

Page 18

Give Where You Live

Page 19

Something for Posterity

Page 20

The Gift That Keeps on Giving

Page 21

By Aimee Kimmey

Publisher/Art Director: Matt Scharf Business Manager:

Scott Ford

Sales: Eric Kemper Event Calendar: Eric Kemper Valley Voice is published monthly and distributed on the last Wednesday of each month. Please address letters, questions, comments or concerns to: Valley Voice, LLC, P.O. Box 770743 or come by and see us at 1125 Lincoln Ave, Unit 2C, Steamboat Springs, CO 80477. Or contact Matt Scharf: 970-846-3801. Scott Ford: 970-819-9630. Website Subscription rate is $40 per year (12 issues). All content © 2017 Valley Voice, L.L.C. No portion of the contents of this publication may be reproduced in any manner without the written permission from the Valley Voive.

Official Fine Print

Advertisers assume full responsibility for the entire content and subject matter of their ads. In the event of error or omission in the advertisement, the publisher’s sole responsibility shall be to publish the advertisement at a later date. Advertisements and articles are accepted and published upon the representation that the author, agency and/or advertiser is authorized to publish the entire contents and subject matter thereof. The author, agency, and/ or advertiser will indemnify and save Valley Voice, LLC harmless from all claims and legal action resulting from the contents of the articles or advertisements including claims or suits resulting from libel, defamation, plagiarism, rights to privacy and copyright infringements.

By Dagny McKinley By Debora Black By Eric Kemper

By Wina Procyzyn By Dan Hughes

By Eric Kemper

By LA Bourgeois

Swept Clean Page 22

Darkness falling at 4 in the afternoon… The Broncos season that got away… Gropers… Christmas decorations that won’t stay inflated… Lack of professionalism, responsiveness & follow-through… At 9 miles per gallon, now what is it with a leak in the gas tank… Watching your blind cat walk right off the balcony onto the jagged rocks below… Laughing so hard, you shoot jello through your nose and over the gravy… Warm ski season starts…

Raves... Finishing all the winter prep chores and getting to the “bring it on” state of mind… The anticipation… Thanksgiving leftovers… Eggnog season… Installing lighting without an electrician… Landslide election victories… People who still love the Yampa River Queen… Affordable housing...

By Wandering Rose

The Balance of the Sexes? By Mr. Helpful M.D.

Page 23

Altitude Sickness Page 24 By Monica Yager

All Cattle, No Hat By Lorre Buss

Page 25

Yepelloscopes Page 26 By Chelsea Yepello


Page 27

Say What?... Bannon/Palpatine ’20? “I didn’t change, I just found myself?” “They say laughter is the best medicine. Not if you’re incontinent, it isn’t…?” “I hope I never go to jail because I haven’t memorized a phone number since 2001?” “5A passed?” “A dollar a day to ski is like a day in the 60s” “After the game, I got me some butter gut!”

The views and opinions expressed reflect the views and opinions of the authors and may not necessarily reflect the views and opinion of the editor, staff or advertisers in Steamboat’s Valley Voice. Direct all correspondence, articles, editorials or advertisements to the address below. The author’s signature and phone number must accompany letters to the editor. Names will be withheld upon request (at the discretion of the publisher). Submission is no guarantee of publication. Subscription rate is a donation of 40 measly dollars per year. However, if you wish to send more because you know we desperately need your money, don’t be shy, send us all you can!


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I think I’m a big kid at heart, so I get very excited about the holidays.—Bobby Moynihan


December 2017

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Steamboat Ski AlanCorp. Weisman

Library Author Series:

Snow Bowl

Monday, March 17 6:30 p.m. Good November 1, 2017 – December 15, 2017. Not valid w Library Hall An evening with Alan Weisman, awardwinning journalist and author of the international bestseller The World Without Us, discussing his new book,

Countdown: Our Last, Best Hope for a Future on Earth

Poof, there goes another year. It went quick. They say, the older you get, the faster time goes. It’s very true. It’s life’s cruelest joke, and sometimes life isn’t all that funny.

Plus watch for these other upcoming Library events! March 6 | Lunafest March 10 | Introducing the Bud Werner Seed Library March 12 | Yoga Film Series ~ Kumare

2017 has seemed to go without a hitch so far (knock on wood). At least there were no injuries this year to burden the work load. One endo over the bars on the KTM would have set me back at least three issues! Just a few bumps and bruises along the way, but nothing to go crying to anyone about. Very busy is usually a good problem for a person to have.

March 25 | Talking Predators

A talk with Foundation for Deep Ecology Senior Scientist George Wuerthner

March 26 | Inside Perry-Mansfield’s “No Hero� Artistic Residency March 31 | Wild Films: Condors Hunt filmStore screening &Twice� talk with “It’s NeverScavenger the Same Condor Field Biologist Jean Lawrence

April 1 | Climate Change: Serious. Simple. Solvable. A talk with CSU

Atmospheric Scientist Scott Denning & science writer John Calderazzo

All events in Library Hall. FREE. 970.879.0240 | More events & info at

I want to take this space to thank you all for another great year. I describe the Valley Voice as a collective soul of creativity. It is truly a local effort in Routt County. Many hours go into this publication and it shows. To all the wordsmiths who write every month - thank you. To the writers who submit here and there - thank you. To all the artists - a huge thank you.

Oh Schmiggity!



)FJ<I 1IFG?@<J Natural Light Images

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To all our advertisers; Thank you. Thank you for supporting the Valley Voice. We simply couldn’t do it without your business. We hope many more come into the fold of good, fun, local creativity.


Thank you all again and looking forward to a great 2018!

For those who live here and for those who wish they did.


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Special thanks to Eric Kemper and Scott Ford. These guys are important cogs here at the VV. Also, another shout#IFD 9<<I :8EJ KF KF@C<K J<8KJ out to the Valley Voice’s co-founder, Paulie Anderson. I hope4<VCC D8B< @K 8N<JFD< you are prospering in your new adventures.



365 hugs for Karen Vail, Cully Kistler, Aimee and Scott Kimmey, Ellen and Paul Bonnefield, Dagny McKinley, Crash Sterne, Michael David, Lyn Wheaton, Debora Black, $<K 6FLI #8EK8JP #FFK98CC FE LA Bourgeois, Lorre Buss, Monica Yager, Fred Robinson, Hayden Chelsea Yeppello, Scott Parker, Jeff Morehead, John WhitHeritage Center tum, Marian Tolles, Nancy Spillane, the late Dale Boberg Museum and anyone else who has contributed to the Voice this year. This magazine would not function without your creative input. "E>I8M@E>


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Valley Voice

December 2017

Economics Common Sense of Our Dollars and Cents


Oak Creek, Colorado

Is Steamboat Springs a Special Snowflake? By Scott L. Ford

Way too often those of us who live in Steamboat Springs consider this town a “special snowflake,” Essentially thinking that there is no other place like it. However, many of its social/economic fundamentals are not all that different from the towns/cities we seem to spend an inordinate amount of time trying to differentiate ourselves from, by saying we are not like – (fill in the blank). I believe there is great value in comparative data. For example, recently the Denver Broncos scored 16 points against the New England Patriots. Although the score is an interesting statistic, it is essentially meaningless without some basis for comparison. Without comparison, it is difficult to know whether 16 points is good or bad. Looking only at other games the Broncos have played this season, we can see that previously they have scored 16 points on two other occasions. Although again a fascinating statistic, it is meaningless because it lacks the context of who won the game. In the previous two 16 points incidents the Broncos beat Oakland 16 to 10 and lost to the Bills 26 to 16. Unfortunately, the 16 points scored by the Broncos recently was not enough to off-set the 41 points scored by the Patriots. This month I am going to spend some time with comparative data and what insights it can give us regarding the total employment and employment associated directly with tourism. See the table below. Having a clear definition of the data is the first step in the journey toward understanding. Start using these terms in everyday conversation you will start to sound like an economist. First, this data is from the US Census Bureau’s American Community Survey (ACS). The source data used in the ACS statistical modeling is from the IRS. This simply means that the data represents the residents of the area vs. those who work in the area and commute. This data reflects a five-year rolling average (2011-2015).

Workforce Participation Rate – Anyone over the age of 16 years who worked in the past 12 months is considered a part of the workforce. The total population of individuals over the age of 16 is considered the labor force. Workforce divided by Labor Force results in the Workforce Participation Rate. Direct Tourism Employment – In the economic data there is no specific industry identified as “tourism”. Although likely far from perfect, I use the following industry sectors grouped by Census as being Direct Tourism: Arts, entertainment, and recreation, and accommodation and food services. Without question there are some direct elements of tourism in Retail Trade, just as there are some elements of the local population in food services. In my analysis I assume that they off-set each other. Full-Time Employment – For Census reporting purposes, any one individual who is working between 50 and 52 weeks per year and over 35 hours per week is considered working full-time. Some of these folks working full time may have more than one job that is in the same industry sector. Median Annual Earnings – Earnings are a subset of income. Earnings include only that income coming from wage/salary and self-employment. Included in wage/salary would be any reported tips the employee received. Hourly Wage Equivalent Assuming a 40-hour week times 52 week per year results in 2,080 hours. Divide Median Annual Earnings by 2080 results in an hourly wage equivalent rate. Steamboat’s Ending Score Although we may feel like Steamboat is a “special snowflake” compared to its peer communities, it is, for the most part, in the middle. That is perhaps what makes Steamboat such a “special snowflake”.

Comparable Colorado Communities and Statewide Statewide Aspen


Crested Butte


Steamboat Telluride


Workforce Participation Rate









Direct Tourism Employment as a Percentage of Total Employment









Percentage of Total Employment that are Full-Time









Percentage of Direct Tourism Jobs that are Full-Time









Median Annual Earnings for Full-Time Direct Tourism Jobs



$27,054 $26,486





The percent of Full-Time Direct Tourism Median Earnings that are below Median Full-Time Earnings









Hourly Wage Equivalent of Direct Full-Time Tourism Employment









Photo by Kelly Koehler Feeling gratitude and not expressing it is like wrapping a present and not giving it.—William Arthur Ward


December 2017

Valley Voice

Bonnifield Files

“Just One of the Boys”: Musings from Marjorie Perry By Marianne Capra

This month the Bonnifield Files welcomes guest editor Marianne Capra from Perry Mansfield. Marianne is a historical impersonator who takes on the persona of a historical figure to tell the story. Marjorie Perry’s story is based on historical documents and told in her voice, as imagined by Marianne. Enjoy.

My dear mother Lottie did not have it easy. She was a sweet, understanding, soft “high society” lady who wanted to be a good mother. Pregnant with me, she choked and wheezed her way through all nine months in the industrial city of Chicago, Illinois. Then I picked a bitter cold, wickedly windy night to arrive in November 1882. My father was sorely disappointed—he wanted his firstborn to be a boy—so even though they named me Marjorie I grew up to be “just one of the boys.” That suited me fine. Behind her back, my pop, Sam Perry, took me on my first horseback ride at the tender age of three months—tucked under one arm, his other holding reins of a white steed. When we moved to Denver a few years later to get the “mountain cure” for my mother’s congested lungs, he made sure me and my siblings grew up with backyard horses to ride. And not any horses—he preferred the spirited ones, race track retirees. Maybe you know my Pop? He was an Oak Creek coal mine owner and friends with David Moffat who brought the train through Colorado, including Steamboat Springs.

later, after a name change, “We called it a camp because we and our students would live under primitive conditions and would swim and ride and explore the mountain country... Climbing far into the hills on horseback, we knew where to find wild raspberries, the first chokecherries, the best waterfalls, even where to expect mushrooms after a rain.” This is an excerpt from our 1921 camp plan: “Here life is free, simple, and sweet. For perfect expression in dancing, music or any creative art, freedom of the body, and of the spirit, is necessary. Life in the great silence of the stern white peaks is healthful. It recreates the body and the mind.” One of the campers I trained wrote words from my own heart in the Perry-Mansfield publication Pine Bark: “I am a wrangler, a cowboy of sorts. You say about me, ‘Why she’d be cute—if her face wasn’t so red (from riding), her hair so straggly (from the wind), her clothes so dusty (and stinking of horse); yes, she’d be darn cute. My only answer; What do you know about the rising sun, the grassblades bejeweled with dew, the soft squelch of horses’ feet in the marsh, and the touch of a warm furry body and a hungry nose? You cannot appreciate a scalding coffee

Horses brought me happiness for the rest of my life. A happiness I shared for years with hundreds of girls who stayed at my sister’s camp in the northwestern Colorado backcountry. While my sister Charlotte Perry taught theater, and her college friend Portia Mansfield instructed dance, I educated the campers on how to ride and care for horses (as well as themselves)—oftentimes on three or four day trips deep into the wilds of Routt County. This place was not just about barefoot girls twirling in gauzy Grecian dresses. It was about making them feel as tough as Tango, our ornery miner’s mule. I put the “camp” in what was originally known as the Rocky Mountain Dance Club. As my sister Charlotte wrote

For those who live here and for those who wish they did.

unless you have been up for two hours in the cold dawn (your hands frozen from riding.)” That’s what I call wisdom from the stables. It’s why I’m a wrangler—and you aren’t. But, perhaps you could be: I turned others into wranglers, mostly notably my life-long companion Eleanor Bliss. I raised all sorts of animals for food or as pets or just to keep creatures close to me: cattle, karakul sheep, goats, turkeys, dogs, cats, bear cubs (Perrywinkle!) and sometimes squirrels, but it was the horses that I adored. I named my favorites Gypsy—free-spirited wanderers. The Denver Post called me the best woman shot in the state; every year I hunted deer, elk, bear and lion with my father and brother Robin. I was heartbroken when certain horses died, so I skinned them, tanned them and kept them nearby—slung over beds, sofas and bare floors.

I realize that you may not understand me: I am a social outlaw and a renegade. I broke the unwritten rules of society and lived as few women did in my day. I’m not so sure I would fit in any better with you folks of today….

Valley Voice

It’s strange to be talking about myself. It’s not like I’ve lived my life on a stage or in front of an audience like Charlotte and Portia. Those two had an uncanny ability for attracting uncommonly talented people to the first ever modern dance camp in the United States. I made those city girls strong sitting in Western saddles, feeding them fresh milk, lamb chops and field greens from the giant garden I tended (and defended from sundry predators) on our Strawberry Park campus. Strawberry Park was Remington’s Ranch, growing large, late-season strawberries before we got our start there in 1914 after Mr. Metcalf sold us his homestead with the log cabin we called Cabeen. Those red juicy jewels were willing to hide our secrets. It was an isolated place, perfect for our purposes. In those days, Steamboat Springs was a ranching and agricultural mecca that specialized in small town thinking. During our first summer, some locals believed Satan’s minions had moved in and were dancing nearly-naked amidst the aspens; others refused to set foot onsite even to deliver the foodstuffs we ordered and prepaid. By the second summer, we offered local scholarships (tuition worked off as camp kitchen assistants or in the barn with me) and three families sent their girls— Marian Metcalf, Alma Baer and Dr. Kernaghan’s daughter Lilian. Those contented girls and their families coaxed friends and neighbors to attend the end-of-season production, a musical and dance performance that enchanted this Routt County cow town. That day we cracked open their whole world, and from then on the community embraced us. And I bear-hugged right back. Over time I stepped away from various camp duties and focused more on making friends and availing myself of adventures (I am a charter member of the Colorado Mountain Club). Late spring, I moved the camp animals from Denver to Steamboat Springs over the mountains on horseback with chickens tucked into my coat pockets. Unlike Charlotte and Portia, sometimes I wintered at camp, tramping through the snow to the hot springs and hitching rides on the train—jumping off with my skis on the mountain tops to pass the time when the engine inevitably got stuck in the deep snow. I guess it comes as no surprise that I was inducted as a female ski pioneer into the Colorado Ski Hall of Fame. It was on one of those train trips that I met a man who would add his legacy to this landscape. The train was stopped in Hot Sulphur Springs to re-fuel coal and swap passengers, when my friends insisted I go with them to see The Flying Norseman and his ski club friends from Denver. A cheering crowd stood at the base of the first Colorado Winter Carnival. I joined them and introduced myself to Carl Howelsen and invited him to Steamboat Springs. He took me up on my offer, arriving a month later in February and fell in love with the place. He bought a small ranch in Strawberry Park where he raised hogs and showed the children from town how to jump off the roof of his house. Then he took my advice and started a Winter Carnival here the next year.

December 2017


Go Figure!?

Holiday Budgeting Realities By Scott L. Ford

A majority of Americans say they set a budget limit for their holiday shopping; 56% have already set or plan to set a limit, while 41% say they don’t use a budget limit for holiday shopping. Women are more inclined than men to use a holiday budget. Fully 63% of women use a budget limit for holiday shopping, compared with 49% of men. Parents of minor age children (64%) are more likely than non-parents and those with adult age children to set a limit (51% each). Younger and middle-aged adults are about equally likely to report using a budget limit for holiday shopping; older adults (ages 65 and older) are less likely to do so. Regardless of whether folks use a budget, a majority report that it is usually easy or very easy to pay for their holiday shopping. About one in five (21%) adults say it is usually very easy to pay for their holiday shopping; 51% say it is easy and 24% say it is difficult or very difficult to do so. Not surprisingly, the less affluent are more likely to report difficulty paying the holiday bills. Fully 45% of those with incomes under $30,000 say it is difficult or very difficult to pay for holiday shopping; about half (48%) say it is easy or very easy to do so. By contrast, fewer than onein-ten (9%) of those with incomes of at least $100,000 report difficulty paying for holiday shopping; 89% say it is easy or very easy to do so.

Holiday Budgeting Realities

Who Budgets and Who Does Not Households that Set a Budget for Holiday 56% Men 49% Women 63% Ages 18-29 56% 30-49 62% 50-64 57% 65+ 39% Incomes > = 100K 53% > = $50K & <$100K 63% > = $30K & < $50K 60% < $30K 52% Children Households with Children Under 18 years 64% Households with Children over 18 years 51% No Children 51%

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After that I ski-raced in every one (except the year my mother died and I had a leg injury) until I passed on to those mythical mountains in the never-ending sky. Had I lived twice as long, I cannot imagine packing in more adventure.

“Is Ted’s open yet?” The way of the pioneer is always rough.—Harvey S. Firestone


December 2017

Valley Voice

‘Boat Almanac

I Got Rhythm, You Got Rhythm By Karen Vail

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Photo by Karen Vail

Yep, we all got rhythm!! All animals, plants, even fungi and certain bacteria, have an internal clock that revolves around an approximate 24-hour cycle. This inspired Franz Halberg in 1959 to coin the term “circadian”, from the Latin word “circa” (about) and “dies” (days). This circadian rhythm is driven by a biological circadian clock. There is a difference between a 24 hour cycle, such as that of the tides, and the internal, self-sustaining patterns of circadian rhythms. Circadian rhythms are biological processes with three criteria: 1) they must be an endogenous (built-in and self-sustaining) period running on an approximate 24 hour cycle and will even persist in constant conditions (such as constant darkness), 2) the rhythm can be reset by exposure to external stimuli such as heat and light, a process called entrainment (when we fly to Europe we are resetting our biological clock to bring it in sync with the local time), and 3) the rhythms maintain circadian tendencies over a wide range of temperatures.

are the only bacteria that can photosynthesize. Did they evolve a biological clock to take advantage of a dramatically changing Earth atmosphere during the Great Oxidation Event 2.3 billion years ago? (“Peroxiredoxins are conserved markers of circadian rhythms”. Nature. 485(7399): 459–464. (24 May 2012)). We are not really sure. As life evolved and grew more complex, the environmental cues varied and animals and plants gained more mobility, the biological rhythms adapted. The constant throughout this time seemed to be the response to light and often temperature. So it seems circadian rhythms are entrained (synchronization of biological clocks) by external stimulus and help organisms prepare for cycles of the outside world. They help organisms predict seasonal changes in weather, predator activity, food availability, as well as providing cues for

In 1729 Jean-Jacques Dortous de Mairan, a French astronomer, noted the closing and opening of the sensitive plant leaves (Mimosa). These plants close their leaves at night and open them in daylight. When de Mairan placed the plants in total darkness, the plants unexpectedly continued their open-close cycle, spawning a new field of scientific research. Over the years, research has shed light on the importance of circadian rhythms in everything from flowering times in plants and sleeping and feeding times in animals, to cellular functions. One question still remains somewhat enigmatic: why were circadian rhythms part of the evolutionary process in the first place? The simplest life forms exhibiting a circadian rhythm are cyanobacteria. Also called blue-green bacteria, these For those who live here and for those who wish they did.

Photo by Karen Vail

Valley Voice

December 2017


“Let us be lazy in everything, except in loving and drinking, except in being lazy.” Gotthold Ephraim Lessing

hibernation, migration and reproduction in animals and seasonal growth cues in plants. In animals (including us animals!) these rhythms are important in sleeping and feeding patterns, as well as varying core body temperatures, brain activity, hormone production, cell regeneration and other biological activities (Wikipedia article on Circadian rhythm). If you are a day active animal (diurnal activity), you sure don’t want to be caught far away from your protective home after sunset! You also want to greet the morning sun to get as many hours of foraging in as you can. And incredibly, according to Science News (“The Origin of Biological Clocks” July 15, 2015), circadian clocks tick in every cell in the body. These finely tuned clocks found in the liver, spleen, fatty tissue, etc. set sleep patterns and meal times by regulating hormones and how the body responds to biological processes. In plants, circadian rhythms signal when to flower, grow, germinate, and produce certain fragrances, as well as enzyme production, photosynthetic activity and exchanging gasses to name a few things. Just as in animals, plants entrain their clocks to synchronize with the light cycle of their surrounding environment. Plant rhythms are a finely tuned feedback loop involving certain light receptors and proteins. As light hits the photoreceptors, certain protein activators are turned on or off. There is a morning feedback loop that is the wake up timer and growth stimulator. The night feedback loop is involved in flowering activities. A plant grown in total darkness or total light looses track of its rhythm, becoming arrhythmic. Can animals thrive if they are exposed to total darkness or light? Well, the animals of the Arctic see 24 hour days of light and dark seasonally, and according to recent research (“Animal activity around the clock with no overt circadian rhythms: patterns, mechanisms and adaptive value” July 3, 2013, Proceeding of the Royal Society B) there is no real consistency through the species. Reindeer and ptarmigan varied by location (northern herds and groups have different rhythms than southern species). Bird species migrating to the far north were totally across the board according to a National Geographic article by Jane J. Lee (June 18, 2013 “For Some Arctic

Birds, Time of Day Is Irrelevant”):”Lapland longspurs (Calcarius lapponicus) exhibit a 24-hour cycle, while semipalmated sandpipers (Calidris pusilla) and pectoral sandpipers(Calidris melanotos) are active around the clock. Red phalaropes(Phalaropus fulicarius) shift from a roughly 21-hour cycle to a 29-hour cycle.” Simply put, things are more complicated than we thought! Last, but not least, we humans animals are totally messing up our circadian rhythms! Those of you getting in the last minutes of screen time before bed are telling your body’s internal clock that it is still mid day as the screen’s intense blue light stimulates certain receptors in your eyes suppressing the formation of melatonin, a natural hormone produced a couple of hours before bedtime that helps us relax. Harvard Health Letter suggested using red lights as night lights, using blue-blocking glasses if you are working on screens before bedtime, getting plenty of sunlight during the day, turning off screens two to three hours before bed, and incorporating warmer LED lighting with less blue wavelengths. Those of you varying your daily bedtime also throw off your rhythm. And those poor souls on night shifts or rotational shifts are basically in a constant state of jet lag. We might just shrug this off and feel lousy, but research is proving that ignoring our internal body clock affects memory formation in the short term, and in the long term increases the risk of diabetes, cancer, obesity and heart disease (BBC News website, October 2, 2017). We also have a microbiome in our body that is very tied to how and when we do things. One of the most important is when we eat. If we eat randomly throughout the day, our gut microbiomes quite cycling normally which leads to health problems. Christoph Thaiss from the Weizmann Institute of Science conducted studies on mice and found disrupting their rhythmic cycles (like intense jet-lag) made the mice gain weight and have erratic blood sugar levels.

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Keep your rhythm this holiday season! See you on the trails!

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Rhythm is God. I think, without rhythm, you can’t create – there is no art.—Alejandro Gonzalez Inarritu

December 2017

Valley Voice

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Merry Christmas from the Green Company!

I throw presents!

Tales from the Front Desk

Lost-n-Found: The Baby Blanket By Aimee Kimmey

Their flight home was an early one. The kids were asleep in the cab when they did the final sweep of room 104. No one noticed the blanket had slipped off the edge of the bed, into the gap by the wall. Since the room was empty for the night, the maid didn’t get there until the middle of the afternoon. She started on the beds like usual; ripping off the bedding and tossing it into the laundry hamper on her cart. As she tugged on the sheets of the second bed, a splash of color caught her eye.

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She kneeled down to investigate. Underneath the bed she found the forgotten blanket. She marveled as she held it up. The colors were faded by now, but the fabric swatches were clearly from a bygone era. The satin edges were fraying, and it had been stained and painstakingly cleaned many times. Still, it looked like it was as soft and warm as ever.

198 East Lincoln Ave. Hayden, Colorado 970-276-4250


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The story you are about to read is true... more or less. Monday. 2:30 pm. Room 104. In the summer of 1949, Great Grandma June sat down with the ladies of her church group and began to sew a blanket. Her daughter Lizzie, short for Elizabeth, was just about to have her first child. When Lizzie brought the baby girl home from the hospital, she was swaddled in Grandma’ June’s colorful creation. Each of the ladies from June’s church had donated bright fabric swatches from their own collection. They blessed each stitch and backed it with the softest fabric man could make. June had even broke into her savings to buy a yard of expensive satin to trim it. Lizzie’s child could not have been more content.

The maid knew this must be something special to someone. So she folded it delicately and set it out of harm’s way on her cart. When she finished turning the room over, the maid took the blanket down to the front desk. She and the front desk clerk marveled over the piece of work. This wasn’t something anyone could have ever bought. With a heavy heart, the clerk tucked the blanket into the lost-and-found box. This treasure must’ve meant a great deal to somebody. Two days later, the front desk clerk picked up the phone to hear a frantic young mother with a wailing child in the background. “Oh I hope you can help us, we stayed there last weekend and we may have left a baby blanket?”


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When Lizzie’s oldest daughter, Jenny, announced that she was pregnant, Lizzie dug out that old blanket. Jenny cried when she opened it; she couldn’t believe her mother wanted her to use such a precious heirloom. Each of her two children came home wrapped in the same blanket. When Jenny’s kids outgrew the blanket, she tucked it carefully into their keepsake box. Jenny’s oldest son, Bill, grew up and married Sadie, a fine woman that Jenny liked very much. At Sadie’s first baby shower, Jenny presented her with the blanket. Sadie was speechless. Like all the others, her children came home from the hospital wrapped in the blanket, even the twins. The youngest loved the blanket so much he wouldn’t leave the house without it. So when they went on vacation, the blanket came too.

For those who live here and for those who wish they did.

By the desperation in the mother’s voice, the front desk clerk knew immediately that she must be talking about the baby blanket from 104. “Is it a patchwork quilt with satin edges?” “Oh thank God! You’ve found it.” The front desk clerk could hear the tears of relief in Sadie’s voice. In the background she could hear Bill cooing to the crying child; the missing blanket was found! Without delay the front desk clerk bundled the blanket into a padded envelope. The maid ran it directly to the post office and paid for the shipping out of her own pocket. Great Grandma June’s blanket was home for the holidays.

Valley Voice

December 2017


Art in the ‘Boat

The Gift of Giving By Dagny McKinley

I don’t know about you, but it feels pretty darn good when someone gives you a present. It means someone was thinking about you. Not only that, it means that they made an effort to go out and do something that would brighten your day. Just as good as getting is giving. When you give, you are the one to put a smile on someone else’s face. You get to make them feel special and let them know they are cared for.

Giving is a great way to make a difference in someone’s life this holiday season. At the Steamboat Springs Arts Council (SSAC) there are so many ways you can make someone smile, can make a difference in someone’s life, and can change the way they see the world. 1. Donate. Every penny and every dollar you give to the SSAC touches the lives of artists and creatives. Money goes to making Steamboat a more vibrant Creative District, goes to art education, classes and camps for kids and adults, goes to programming like Cabaret and Art in the Park, and goes to giving artists opportunities to create and share their work with the world. There is no donation that is too small or too large to help. 2. Bring in unused or gently used art supplies. Create Space was imagined by the SSAC’s Executive Director, Kim Keith, to make sure that teachers and artists could have access to supplies they might not otherwise be able to afford. Paint, paper, yarn, beads, stickers, you name it and there is someone else who can find a creative use for it.

3. Volunteer. The Steamboat Springs Arts Council is a nonprofit with a small staff. We depend on volunteers to make each of our events successful, to help watch the gallery, and to help with projects. Even if you only have an hour or a couple of hours to spare each month, that time helps tremendously. 4. Teach. Each summer the SSAC puts on Young At Art Creativity Camps representing writing, crafts, performing arts, dance, music and more. The theme for 2018 is self-expression. Anyone interested in teaching should visit for more information. 5. Create. The Steamboat Springs Arts Council was created 45 years ago to support artists in the Yampa Valley. Our mission hasn’t changed. We want every artist and every creative to have a space to create, to have supplies with which they can create, and to have the freedom to find their voice through art. With your help, Steamboat’s Creative District and creatives will flourish. When you give this holiday season you can be confident that your donation - whether through money, time or creativity - will bring a smile to someone’s face. If you want to donate or get involved, visit www. or stop by the Steamboat Art Depot at 1001 13th Street in the old train depot.

Matt Scharf’s Studio/Prisma app - Comic Filter

God gave us the gift of life; it is up to us to give ourselves the gift of living well.—Voltaire


December 2017

Valley Voice

The Paw Print

The Feel Good By Debora Black

curl, following the momentum down and in, sweeping back up and around and down, and the rhythm continues soft and sweet until I cross the road, and dive into a steep, bowlshaped run. Wow. Snow high up my thighs! Barks and howls, the cries from the powder hounds, carry across the mountain while I rise and fall over giant mounds carved-out by everyone who beat me down the slope. Halfway through the run, I straighten out for speed. I pass several people as I cross the expanse of flat that will take me to my three lift options. Only two count. Storm Peak Express is where everyone wants to be. It’s a quad, carries four at a time at high speed to the top of this side of the ski area. The Storm line gets really long, fast. If you’re not in the first group of chairs, a whole lot of people can get to the runs ahead of you. My other option is Four Points. It seats three. It’s slower. It stops at mid-mountain. Dropping in at mid-mountain means sacrificing some primo terrain. But it will give me the advantage of getting ahead of everyone already in line at Storm. Being ahead puts me in the best position for return passes. My thighs are burning from riding my toe edge for so long, but shifting to my heel edge will slow me down. I crest the saddle and get a full view of the lifts. They’re just now boarding Storm. Big Line. No one at Four Points. I cut sharply across the field of snow and come to a sliding stop at the Four Points chair. The gondola car, packed full, makes a rough landing at the top of Heavenly, swinging from side to side from a onehanded grip on the thick cable, and bumping at intervals into the long length of dock before settling. There is a dramatic pause, waiting for the doors. I adjust my goggles as if I’m an X-Games contender. It’s a powder day in Steamboat, and I’m about to get my feel good. Smokey clouds are scattered across the sky. The ski mountain is washed in pale grey. But the atmosphere is anything but peaceful. It feels like shoulders and elbows at the start gate as skiers and riders step into bindings and launch into various ski runs. Everyone is competing for first tracks, and we all have a strategy. I ratchet down the last binding strap of my snowboard and push myself up to standing. I am bound-up in the collective energy around me. I hop to the edge of the slope and drop into the Fresh, the Pow, the Champagne. Over twelve inches of new! I am air. Smooth, controlled. I guide my board through the snow, moving from edge to edge through shifting pressures of toes and heels and rolling hips. I head right and pick up the untracked tree line. The snow is always deeper on this ridge, and since everyone is hurrying to the next lift, this area is forgotten. The snow is over my knees. It’s tricky to stay right, because the slope pulls you back-in to the left, so I ride it like you see a surfer on a wave, sweeping back to the top of the

*** I’m the only one on the mountain. All I hear is the sound of the cold, still air. If this sound were a color it would be as blue as wonder. This sound of blue wonder fills me. I take deep breaths of it and release. I look out beyond the ski area to the distant white range. It’s massive. I think of all of the wild animals inhabiting that expanse. Marvel at how they manage and how they love. The top of Cyclone is steep, but the snow is mid-thigh and has some weight to it. My turns are shallow, effortless. I glide through the soft grey sky, and the blue that is inside me, and the deep, sweeping undulations of white. Inside these colors and the crisp, thin air and the endless expanse of my surround, I know that I can do anything. White is the color of Lucy’s tennis dress. I can see her as she was, stretched upward to full extension in the middle of her serve. A slight frame that will fool you, an easy fiveseven, she is perched on the tips of her toes. The muscles of her legs are flexed taught and create a shadow that runs from behind her ankle bone to somewhere high up, under the hemline of her dress. Her back is arched, her breasts are compressed beneath the tight of that fabric. Her face is lifted to the sky. Her right arm is poised over her head and bent at the elbow with her racket dropped behind her back. She is intent on her purpose. She is complete focus. She is about to raise that forearm and snap

For those who live here and for those who wish they did.

her entire body up and into the ball with a power that will make my skin tingle in admiration and pride. Cyclone bottoms out, and I cross a flat area where slopes converge. I ride fast and straight across the flat to take the rise that leads to Vortex and Dropout. The rise and Dropout have been groomed. Otherwise I could not have made the ascent with my snowboard. I head into the un-groomed on Vortex and create small avalanches as I descend. Lucy is my one, true, human friend. She lives several states away. We talk almost every day about everything. She likes to hear about all of the things I do in Colorado. If Lucy saw me ski, if she saw me poised in mid-turn, she would see that I am in classic ski racer position, my inside knee, hip, and shoulder angulated so that a plumb line could drop through my center. This angulation is exaggerated, aggressive, balancing me on the edges of my skis, which are tipped so far over that the opposite edges are lifted out of the snow and parallel to the angle of the slope. There is a curve in my skis from the pressure of my turn, which has lifted the snow that is swirling around me. I am complete concentration. I feel the strength of my legs holding my edges. I feel the power of my speed. I feel every fear of every time I held back in my life. I feel the loss of the things that might have been. Lucy would like seeing my aggression as I power down the hill, my body crossing over the top of my skis and dropping into that angulation, crossing and dropping, crossing and dropping as I move from turn to turn. She would grin in that tight, practiced way of not fully showing herself. She would say, God damn, Deb! I would hear in her voice the thing that would make me grin back. I wouldn’t be able to help myself, because Lucy is always number one in her division, the number one female in the state. When she comes down on that ball, she will be hitting it with every disappointment of her life. And every ball that comes back to her, she will hit again, and return it with the power of her will, to say, Huh-uh, no way I’m going down. So if I can make her say God damn, Deb, I know that I am making it too. *** I am on Storm Peak Express. It feels good to sit. It is blue sky, now—and sun. Down below, I discover the prints of a snowshoe rabbit winding in and out of the trees. A small, black squirrel leaps fantastically through the bottomless white. I look over the ski runs and plan my next circuit. There is plenty of untracked snow. I ride Storm Face to Rainbow to Hurricane. I have first tracks all the way. I am lost in all those silky dancing turns, all the sticky fragrance of the pine trees, and my own deepest stirrings. I do more laps from Storm Peak Express, hitting Tornado and Twister and repeating the best of them all. Then I head up BC lift to Norther to the cutoff to Vagabond. I take the slow way down the mountain, meander through all that bright cold snow. I am filled with the expanse of the possibilities still in front of me. My legs will be mush by the time I get to the bottom. There will be no holding back.


3rd Street

Grant Ave.

Lincoln Ave

Wild Hogg Dr.

Valley Voice

December 2017


Happy Holidays from Twin Enviro! 2 2nd Street

District 1 Road & Bridge E.1st Street

1st Street

Meyers St. Community Center

RCR 27 Main Street

W. Main Street Post Office

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Colfax Street

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Bell Avenue

S. Arthur Ave.


W. Oak St.

d Ben low Wil

Ice Rink

Moffat Ave.

Town Hall

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Carbon Ave.

Senior Living

Sharp Ave.



SR Medical Center

Dodge Ave.


Rollestone St.

Rethink Recreate SOROCO High School Ma Repurpose in Str ee t Restore Your World Public Tennis Courts




Relax, we got it! 6

Highland St.





Tethune Ave.


RCR 14






Clifton Ave.

Roselawn Ave.

RCR 17


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RCR 25



Lowest Price Only Locally Owned Hauler Best Customer Service Locals Supporting Locals

Decker Park

W. William St.





5th Street South Routt Elementary School 4th Street

3rd Street

3rd Street


Maps Disclaimer

2nd Street

© 2017 Valley Voice, LLC. All rights reserved. NOT TO SCALE! No portion of this publication may be reproduced in any manner without the written permission of the publisher. The publisher does not guarantee the accuracy of this map.

9 1st Street

Maps under construction





Moffat Ave.

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Rich Ave.


8 Lincoln Street






RCR 6d






Happy Holidays from the Valley Voice! I can only control my own performance. If I do my best, then I can feel good at the end of the day.—Michael Phelps


December 2017 B A









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Buff Pass Fish Creek Res. Fish Creek Falls

Ski Time Square

Map under construction

Dry Lake

Spring Creek Fish Creek Falls Rd.

Steamboat Blvd.

Valley Voice, LLC 1125 Lincoln Ave. Unit 2C Steamboat Springs, CO 80487


Burgess Creek

Rollingstone Golf Club

Fish Creek

E. Maple Street


Map Disclaimer © 2017 Valley Voice, LLC. All rights reserved. NOT TO SCALE! No portion of this publication may be reproduced in any manner without the written permission of the publisher. The publisher does not guarantee the accuracy of this map.

Tamarack Drive

Amethyst Drive

Amethyst Drive

Hill Top Parkway


RCR 36

Anglers Drive


Memorial Park Fish Creek Falls Rd.

Strawberry Hot Springs

Old Town Hot Springs

Maple Street

Missouri Ave.


Lincoln Avenue


et l Stre Laure

Yam pa Av e

Oa kS t.

Pin eS t.

Ice Rink


Fun Zone

The Howler

10 11

Lin col nA ven ue


Emerald Mountain Yam pa Riv er

12 12

Steamboat Cemetery



Crawford Ave. CMC (College)



7 8


Emerald Park Botanic Gardens

The Boulevard

Merrit Street

Pahwintah St.


4 Asp en St.


Core Trail Weiss Park

Howelsen Hill BMX Track

Ski Jumps

13 Blackmere Drive

Fart Park


Depot Art Center

For those A who live hereBand for those who C wish they did. D







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December 2017 S

Mt. Werner

15 T

Rabbit Ears Pass Dumont Lake




Village Drive

Knowls Mt. Werner Circle Eagle Ridge Dr.

Tennis Bubble

Meadows Parking

Casey’s Pond

Walton Creek

Mt. Werner Road

Central Park Drive

Whistler Road


Pine Grove Road


oad eR v o r eG Pin

131 Haymaker Golf Core Trail

RCR 22

Yampa River

Fetcher Park

Stagecoach Res.

RCR 14

RCR 14f RCR 14


Steamboat Cemetery


Animal Shelter Copper Ridge

Elk River Road

129 Downhill Drive


Bob Adams Airport

Shield Drive

Yampa River

RCR 33

Steamboat Golf Club




Many knowing Q that it is not fish Rthey are after.—Henry David Thoreau N men go fishingOall of their lives without P S T


Schmac and Cheese

December 2017

Valley Voice

OPEN Monday - Saturday 4pm-2am

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rchestra adPhish O e D 7 /1 /1 Friday 12 ad/Phish Tribute De l fu te ra G tate Birds /17 - Yer S ck /2 2 1 y a es Ro Saturd untain Blu Rocky Mo Night 7 - Ladies /1 /7 2 1 y a Thursd Nicks Twins DJ Steezy arth Like E h it w d ydye /8/17 - Sk Friday 12 e Electronic Rock Progressiv alog Son /9/17 - An 2 1 y a rd u Sat an) erly Sumil rm Funk o (f id K achine /15/17 - M Friday 12 ock ! R cans Electronic nge Ameri ra t S 7 /1 /16 ay 122016 ll CPL Dec Saturd ck and Ro o R o d Colora Night 7 - Ladies /1 4 /1 2 1 y Make with some Christmas bullshit. Thursdait festive Nicks sents: DJ Steezy Valley Pre m o o B 1/17 DOS y 12/2with /$25liquors Same and beers and wines ADVthe Thursdatext $20all e s u o -H y r Golf Clap t e m inear Sym /22/17 - L Friday 12 nce Music a Organic D ADD: Freedom 7 - 40 Oz to /1 3 /2 2 1 Saturday bute ts: me Tri for all yourVaHoliday PresenSpirits Subliplace You om lley o B 7 /1 12/28 Thursday T.B.A. Boat issed The M 7 /1 9 /2 Friday 12 ss ra G y t r Pa - Tnertle 12/30/17 Funk Hop y a rd u t a S ce ronic Dan Live Elect ic Beans /17 - Mag s / Ameritronica 1 /3 2 1 y a Gras Sund k / Groove ast Space Fun s NYE champagne to e d $20 inclu 7 pm



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Tuesday Night Pool League Wednesday Night Dart League Thursday Night Open Pool Tournament

Happy Hour Specials 4 - 6 & 10 -12

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t ance Nigh D in t a L : Sunday 9pm raoke/ a K d n a B Live Mondayg: ity Jam ig Schm December 18 Starting pm sday 7 e u T p e t Two-S Tuesday: 9 pm e k o a r a K ay: Wednesd



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Open: Mon - Sat: 9am -11pm Sunday: 10:30am -7pm Located next to City Market in Central Park Plaza, Steamboat Springs.

Valley Voice

December 2017

RECURRING WEEKLY EVENTS: SUNDAYS Latin Dance Night 7PM @ Schmiggity’s (Free Salsa Lessons). FREE. www.schmiggitys. com MONDAYS Live Band Karaoke/ Schmiggity Jam (Starting 12/18) 9PM @ Schmiggity’s. FREE. www.schmiggitys. com TUESDAYS Ski with a Naturalist (Thursdays Also) (Starting 12/12) 1:30PM @ Mt. Werner (Meet where the “Why Not” trail starts) Lift ticket not included. Free program. No registration required. Sponsored by Steamboat Ski & Resort Corporation. Pool League 6PM @ The V Two-Step Tuesday 7PM @ Schmiggity’s (Free Country Dance Lessons). FREE. WEDNESDAYS

Open Pool Tournament 6PM @ The V Ladies Night with DJ Steezy Nicks (Through 12/14) 9PM @ Schmiggity’s. FREE FRIDAYS Uranium Mine Snowshoe Tour (Starting 12/15) 10AM @ Fish Creek Falls Parking lot ($5 parking fee) (Ages 12+) FREE, Registration required. info@yampatika. org or 970.871.9151 Sponsored by the US Forest Service Steamboat Theatrical Society (Every other Friday starting 12/1) Noon @ Arts Depot. FREE Contact for info. SATURDAYS Emerald Mountain (Starting 12/16) 10AM @Howelsen Hill (Ages 12+) $20, Includes Snowshoes, Registration required ( or 970.871.9151)

Weekend Warriors (Except 12/2 & 12/23) Noon-2PM @ Art Depot Drop-ins welcome, Karaoke Night $25 a class. 9PM @ Schmiggity’s. FREE DAILY THURSDAYS Boutique Gift Shop Steamboat Springs 11AM-5PM @ Art Depot Writers Group December 1-28 Noon @ Art Depot. FREE Dart League 6PM @ The V


Calendar of Free Events To submit your free events or calendar information e-mail: Events may be edited for length or content. Calendar entries must be received by the 15th of each month. FRIDAY DECEMBER 1 First Friday Art Walk 5PM @ Downtown Steamboat. Self-guided tour of local art galleries, Museums and alternative venues. FREE. Karaoke Night 9PM @ Circle R Bar, Oak Creek DeadPhishOrchestra 10PM @ Schmiggity’s. $10 SATURDAY DECEMBER 2 Members Appreciation Day @ Off The Beaten Path Holidays In The Rockies 9AM-3PM @ Strawberry Park Elementary

$10. TUESDAY DECEMBER 5 Colorado Gives Day All donations made or scheduled for Dec 5th (Colorado Gives Day) will be boosted by a $1M statewide incentive. History Happy Hour – “Murders & Kidnappings in Routt County” With Paul Bonnifield 5:30PM @ Butcherknife Brewery, 2875 Elk River Rd. FREE. WED. DECEMBER 6



Tread of Pioneers Winter Film Series at the Chief Theater: History Channel’s “Modern Marvels: Snow” 6PM @ the Chief Theater. FREE.

Wild Films: “Light on Earth” 6:30PM @ Library Hall. FREE

Wild Films: “Giraffes: Africa’s Gentle Giants” 6:30PM @ Library Hall. FREE events

Bud Werner Memorial Library’s Foreign Film Series at the Chief 7:00PM @ Chief Theater. FREE



“Perry-Mansfield Performing Arts School & Camp: A History of Art in Nature,” A conversation with author Dagny McKinley. 6:30PM @ Library Hall. FREE events

Boom Valley Presents: Golf Clap 10PM @ Schmiggity’s. $20

FRIDAY DECEMBER 15 Karaoke Night 9PM @ Circle R Bar, Oak Creek

Yer State Birds 10PM @ Schmiggity’s. FREE

Dr. Jon Kedrowski & John Fiedler Present their new books. 6:30PM @ Library Hall. FREE.



Ski Industry Panel Discussion with Chris Diamond, Rob Perlman & Andy Daly @ Off The Beaten Path

Bud Werner Memorial Library Community Yoga Practice BYO Mats & Props 10AM @ Library Hall. FREE

Skydyed with Earth Like Twins 10PM @ Schmiggity’s. FREE. www.schmiggitys. com

Machine Kid (formerly Sumilan) 10PM @ Schmiggity’s. FREE. www.schmiggitys. com



Moonlight Snowshoe Tour 4:30-6:30PM @ Emerald Mountain (Ages 18+) $20, Includes Snowshoes, Registration required ( or 970.871.9151)

Hayden Holiday Stroll 1PM @ Hayden Heritage Center & Wild Goose Coffee Free Family Event

Strange Americans 10PM @ Schmiggity’s. FREE. www.schmiggitys. com

Belinda Rossi 6PM @ Circle R Bar, Oak Creek


MONDAY DECEMBER 4 Bud Werner Memorial Library Presents: Mountainfilm for Students 4PM @ Boys & Girls Club Gym. FREE. Membership Not Required. Bud Werner Memorial Library Presents: Mountainfilm On Tour 6:30PM @ Library Hall.

Analog Son 10PM @ Schmiggity’s. $5 MONDAY DECEMBER 11 Free Film: “Ballerina” 6:30PM @ Library Hall. FREE

Bud Werner Memorial Library Community Yoga Practice 6:30PM @ Library Hall. FREE events Young Bloods Collective Meet Up Cocktails & CRIT(ique) 6:30PM @ Townies by Ohana 1744 Lincoln Ave


FRIDAY DECEMBER 22 Linear Symmetry 10PM @ Schmiggity’s. FREE. www.schmiggitys. com SAT. DECEMBER 23 40 Oz to Freedom 10PM @ Schmiggity’s. $10 MONDAY DECEMBER 25 Merry Christmas! Surprise someone with a subscription to the Valley Voice this year! THUR. DECEMBER 28 Boom Valley Presents: TBA 10PM @ Schmiggity’s. FRIDAY DECEMBER 29 Missed The Boat 10PM @ Schmiggity’s. $5 SAT. DECEMBER 30 Tnertle 10PM @ Schmiggity’s. $5 SUNDAY DECEMBER 31 Magic Beans 10PM @ Schmiggity’s. $20 Includes NYE Champagne Toast

You never know what events are going to transpire to get you home.—Og Mandino


December 2017

Valley Voice

HappyHours Last minute changes can and do occur - Mother Nature, illness, tour malfunction, whatever - the accuracy of this calendar is not guaranteed! 8th Street Steakhouse 4:30 - 6:00 p.m. & 9:00 p.m. Aurum Food & Wine 4:30 - 6:00 p.m. daily Azteca Taqueria 4:00 - 5:00 p.m. & 8:00 - 9:00 p.m. daily

McKnight’s Irish Pub 3:00 - 6:00 p.m. & 9:30 - 11:00 p.m. daily Off the Beaten Path After 4:00 p.m. daily Old Town Pub 3:00 to 6:00 p.m. daily

Back Door Grill 4:00 - 7:00 p.m. daily & All day on Sundays

O’Neil’s Tavern and Grill 4:00 p.m. - 6:00 p.m. & 10:00 p.m. - 12:00 p.m. daily

The BARley 4:00 - 6:00 p.m. daily

The Pit on 5th 2:00 - 6:00 p.m.

Big House Burgers 4:20 - 6 p.m., Mon-Sat. & 2 - 6 Sunday

Rex’s American Grill & Bar 4:20 - 6:00 daily

Cantina Mexican Restaurant 4:00 - 6:00 p.m. daily

The Rusted Porch 2:00 p.m.- 6:00p.m. daily

Carl’s Tavern 4:00 - 6:00 p.m. daily

Salt and Lime 3:30 p.m.- 5:30 p.m. & 10:00 p.m.- 11:00 p.m.

Circle R Bar 4 - 6 p.m. Thurs., Fri.,Sat.

Sake 2 U 3:30 - 5:30 p.m.

Colorado High 5 3:00 - 6:00 p.m. daily

Sambi Canton 5:00 - 6:00 pm Monday - Saturday

Cuginos Italian Restaurant and Pizzeria 3:00 - 6:00 p.m. & 9:00 - 11:00 p.m. daily Double ZZ BBQ 2:30 - 6:00 p.m. daily Dude & Dan’s Bar and Grill 3:00 - 6:00 p.m. daily Late Night Happy Hour: 10:00 - 12:00 p.m. daily E3 Ranch & Chophouse Restaurant 4:00 - 6:00 p.m. daily Harwigs & L’Apogee: 5:00 - 6:30 p.m. daily Laundry 4:30 - 6p.m. Tues.-Sat. Low Country 4:30 - 6 p.m. daily Mahogany Ridge 4:00 - 5:30 p.m. Late night happy hour: 9:00 to 10:00 p.m. daily Mambo Italiano 4:30 to 5:30 p.m. daily Mazzola’s Majestic Italian Diner 5:00 to 6:00 p.m. daily

Schmiggitys 7:00 - 9:00 p.m. daily Scratch 4:00 - 6:00 p.m. daily Slopeside Grill 10:00 p.m.-12:00 a.m. Steamboat Smokehouse 3:00 to 6:00 p.m. & 9:30 to 11:30 p.m. daily: Sunpies Cajun Bistro 3:00 to 6:00 p.m. daily Table 79 Foodbar 5:00 - 6:00 & 9:00 - 11:00 daily The Tap House Sports Grill 3:00 - 6:00 p.m. weekdays Truffle Pig 2:00 - 5:00 p.m. daily The V 4:00 - 6:00 p.m. & 10:00p.m. - 12:00 a.m. Vaqueros Mexican Restaurant & Taqueria 2:00 - 6:00 p.m. daily

First Friday Artwalk December 1, 2017 5 pm - 8 pm All over downtown

ART GALLERIES AND MUSEUMS CENTER FOR VISUAL ARTS 837 Lincoln Ave. | 970.846.8119 Celebrating the grand opening of a Linda Israel Signature Gallery, sharing space with the CVA. New originals never before seen of her iconic, colorful bears, elk, bison and more. Complimentary wine. GALLERY 89 1009 Lincoln Ave. | 970.439.8196 “A Face With Lunar Lips” featuring local artist Kathryn Fresques. We are a contemporary art space which troubles ordinary aesthetic boundaries. Uniting past and future, local and international with curated masterworks from Italy, Spain, Poland and the Boat’s best local talent. JACE ROMICK GALLERY 837 Lincoln Ave. | 970.846.8377 Jace Romick’s photography capturing the American West and its lifestyle, paired with handcrafted artisanal frames to compliment his engaging photos. Come see us at our NEW location MANGELSEN-IMAGES OF NATURE 730 Lincoln Ave. | 970.871.1822 Legendary nature photographer Tomas D. Mangelsen has traveled throughout the world for over 40 years photographing the Earth’s last great wild places. 30% OFF HOLIDAY DISCOUNT! PINE MOON FINE ART 117 9th St. | 970.879.2787 Featuring SMALL WORKS on paper and canvas, pencil, acrylic, monotype, oil - framed and unframed, as well as glass, bronze sculptures, fiber work and photography. STEAMBOAT ART MUSEUM 807 Lincoln Ave. | 970.870.1755 The Steamboat Art Museum Store will feature local artist Sherry Murphy and her beautifully, handmade, one of a kind, ceramic pieces. STEAMBOAT SPRINGS ARTS COUNCIL AT THE DEPOT 1001 13th St. | 970.879.9008 “GIFT” In celebration of the holiday, artist members feature small works of art. A boutique gift shop will fill the platform gallery with note card bundles, ornaments and other handmade gifts.

For those who live here and for those who wish they did.

W GALLERY 115 9th Street, Lincoln Ave. | 970.846.1783 W Gallery will feature “Stairway to Heaven” from acclaimed print studio – Oehme Graphics. Over 40 pieces from the series will be on display through January. WILD HORSE GALLERY 802 Lincoln Ave. | 970-819-2850 Wild Horse Gallery will feature artist Mark Thompson’s amazing egg tempera paintings and etchings. For more information, go to

ALTERNATIVE VENUES HARWIGS/LAPOGEE 911 Lincoln Ave. | 970.879.1919 Oil paintings by Dave Lambeth, spanning cultures and centuries, inspired by the majestic Rocky Mountains and myths of ancient Mexico. PHYSICAL ELEMENTS PERSONAL TRAINING STUDIO 
9th and Oak. | 970.846.0828 Andrew Ratekin mixes abstract and representational styles in his paintings. Stop by Fhysical Elements on 9th street to see.” LYON DRUG 840 Lincoln Ave. | 879-1114 Featuring the original work of Local Artists on greeting cards. Meet the artists and hear about their inspiration for these Yampa Valley images locally produced. THE SKI LOCKER 941 Lincoln Avenue, #100a. | 303.882.4927 Featuring Julia Dordoni, an impressionist who specializes in vibrant landscapes and active urban scenes. From Boulder biergartens to the Maroon Bells, Dordoni is a Colorado talent not to be missed. STEAMBOAT SMOKEHOUSE 912 Lincoln Ave. | 941.321.2809 YBC Gallery @Steamboat Smokehouse presents Miniature Wizardry by Sarah Valentino. This show will take your eyes on a adventure through a truly magical world. Up for the month of December! URBANE 703 Lincoln Ave. | 970.879.9169 Rob Clifton is a wandering artist from Alabama. His work explores the space between language and symbol to convey the transcendental property of multi-sensory perception.

Valley Voice

December 2017


Give it Up!

Give Where You Live By Dan Hughes

GIVE WHERE YOU LIVE – this is our mantra at Yampa Valley Gives. We are a regional champion of the statewide Colorado Gives program, which holds the annual Colorado Gives Day annually on the first Tuesday in December, benefitting hundreds of nonprofits throughout our state. Yampa Valley Gives was founded in 2014 by a group of people who were inspired by what Colorado Gives Day does each year, but asked “how do we help people give to the nonprofits they care about in their own community right here in the Yampa Valley?” Out of that question, Yampa Valley Gives was born. So how does YVG work? Our organization works throughout the year focused on that first Tuesday in December, which we have happily co-opted as Yampa Valley Gives Day – this year on 12.05.17. Our organization is made up of a completely volunteer board; we have no paid employees or staff. We work with over 50 nonprofits in both Routt and Moffat counties, and while we are a regional champion of the Colorado Gives program, we operate as a program of the Yampa Valley Community Foundation. We work with dozens of local businesses, asking for their support as our sponsors, to help get the message out about YVG Day. We raise money for marketing and advertising to raise awareness throughout the year, but especially as we approach December. And those sponsorship dollars go a long way…

in 2016, for every $1 raised in sponsorship, $58 was raised for our local nonprofits! So how much money is raised on YVG Day? In the first three years of YVG’s existence, we have helped the residents and visitors of the Yampa Valley raise over $1.6 Million for our local nonprofits, and THAT MONEY STAYS RIGHT HERE in Routt and Moffat counties. The growth in support from our community has been phenomenal in itself. In our first year, 2014, we raised $404,927 for local nonprofits. In 2015 we just crossed the $500,000 line, and last year the final number raised for local nonprofits on YVG Day totaled $766,777!! So why give on YVG Day? By donating to your favorite local nonprofit through YVG on the first Tuesday of December (12.05.17) your money is boosted by statewide incentive funds. Colorado Gives is a program of the Community First Foundation, which partners with 1st Bank to contribute $1,000,000 to this incentive fund. This $1,000,000 is distributed to nonprofits throughout the

state based on how much was raised on Gives Day. If your favorite nonprofit receives 1% of the total money raised on that day, they receive 1% of the $1,000,000 incentive fund. Every dollar you give on YVG Day is boosted! So how do I give? Go to and click on the “DONATE” button at the top. Find your favorite nonprofit and click “DONATE”. You can donate before YVG Day, just select “CO Gives Day” under “Donation Frequency” and your donation will be scheduled for YVG Day so your dollars are boosted by the $1,000,000 incentive fund. So how can I get involved? Email – there are always opportunities to help, whether it’s an hour of your time or something more. Watch for your favorite nonprofits out and about on YVG Day, honk & wave at them, and then please get to a computer and GIVE WHERE YOU LIVE!!

For it is in giving that we receive.—Francis of Assisi


December 2017

Valley Voice

Drink of the Month Located at Neste Auto Glass

Great Prices, Services & Parts

CO2 tanks filled

Something for Posterity By Eric Kemper

Beer, for all of its complexity and ubiquity, is such a simple beverage. It has only four ingredients, yet in every glass is contained a history of the world from which each beer originates. Water, malt, hops and yeast are all it takes to make this most popular of drinks worldwide. The type of grains, hops and yeast strains the brewer selects determines the characteristics in each glass, and what story that particular beer will tell.

meant to be enjoyed fresh in the moment, rather than aged. To find a good cellar beer, the rule of the Three S’s is a good place to start: 1)Strong—Beers with a higher alcohol content are naturally better candidates for aging, as the alcohol itself acts as a preservative. For example, Imperial Stouts can start out a bit “hot”, with a higher perceptible alcohol character, but given time, this heat can dissipate and the beer develops deeper fruit flavors . Belgian yeasts are also well suited to aging.

How long the story lasts is also a matter for the brewer in his role as storyteller. Most beers are made to drink fresh. Commercial macro lagers have a 90 to 120 day life to them, because if you keep them around past that, their flaws start to show. The adjunct grains start to take on a wet cardboard flavor and the hops begin to break down, giving the beer an increasingly skunky character.

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Craft IPA’s are another style that aren’t built to last. As I wrote about in a previous column (valleyvoicecolorado. com for our archives), the modern American IPA is a marvel of modern technology. Brewed to highlight the freshness of hops at their peak of pungency, kept cold from brewery to store shelf, the IPA is the perfect antithesis of a cellar beer. Drink them now ‘cause they won’t be good later.

2)Sour—In the case of sour beers, acidity takes the place of high alcohol when it comes to the beer’s inherent natural preservatives. Great sour styles like a lambic or a gueuze can clock in with an ABV of 5% or so and be perfect candidates for years of cellar aging. Sharp, acidic edges can soften, fruit flavors can develop, and live yeast cultures in the bottle help maintain the beer’s A vibrancy as it evolves. t w 3)Smoke – Smoke has long been one of the best o known and best loved ways u of preserving food. Meats, k p fish and cheese are all made even more delicious b

There are, however, many beers that do keep very well. Some of them are actually better after a few years of cellaring than they are fresh.


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Many people are surprised to learn that beer can be aged, cellared, increase in value and be traded just like wine can. Once you know what to look for and where to keep it, a well-stocked beer cellar can be one of the best things to keep you through the long, cold Rocky Mountain winters. Just like wine, your beer cellar needs to be in a cool, dry, dark part of your home. If you don’t have an actual cellar, the most interior closet you have, away from exterior walls and other potential heat sources, should work; apartment dwellers shouldn’t be excluded. The two things that destroy a beer the quickest are light and heat. If you can keep out all the natural light and try to maintain a consistent temperature of 50-55°F, conditions should be just right. The biggest difference between keeping wine and keeping beer is the storage. Wine is laid down on its side. This is a historical matter of practicality. Wine bottles are traditionally sealed with a cork, made from the porous bark of a tree. To keep the cork from drying out and exposing the contents of the bottle to the air, the wine is laid down to keep the cork hydrated and swollen. Beer is either capped with an airtight crown or with a champagne cork, designed to remain in place with contents under pressure. Therefore, beer should always be kept standing up. This also allows the residual yeast to settle to the bottom of the bottle, increasing clarity and reducing the potential for oxidation. So now that you have your cellar set up, what should stock it? What are the beers that will last and what might you just putting away to go bad? As stated above, light lagers and IPA’s aren’t suitable candidates. Seasonal beers, true to their name, are also

For those who live here and for those who wish they did.

by being smoked; why not beer? Phenols from the O smoke preserve the beer, “ e and though the smoke flavors fade over time, the L underlying cereal grain flavors remain, with a slightly increasing sweet- I ness to boot. Over time, the n most pungent rauchbier can mellow into something S more akin to a complex A Scotch Ale. a

These are not the exclusive characteristics of an ageable beer, but they represent a good place to start. With this F in mind, why not grab an extra bottle or two of something a special to start your cellar this year. A bottle for now, a ( bottle as a gift and a bottle for the cellar is often how I like t to do it. In a year or two, you’ll have a perfectly aged beer w a and a story to go with it. u Cheers!

Valley Voice

December 2017


Here Knitty-Knitty

The Gift That Keeps On Giving By LA Bourgeois

After years of working in a yarn shop, I am familiar with the sight of people – men AND women, but mostly men – wandering into the store to get something for the knitter or crocheter in their lives. They look a little lost. They pick up those things that rarely get touched – felted animal keychains, measuring tapes covered with a crocheted panda face, embroidery scissors, stitch markers with beads and balls and buttons and bows. Once, a lawyer showed up to get something for his wife. “What would YOU like?” He asked me with a gleam in his eyes. Lying was not an option. I led him directly to the gleaming sets of interchangeable needles with their leather cases.

If you still don’t know where to start, here are some ideas: Remember when you were little and you grabbed your mother’s scissors to use for your school project? The one where you cut pictures from magazines and pasted them to cardboard? And then she walked into the room and lost her mind because you used her fabric scissors to cut paper? Yes. Yes, those scissors. Those scissors are an excellent gift. Now, I’m talking the nice ones: the Ginghers. Each December, new ones show up with special patterns for the year. These are the scissors that you DO NOT USE ON ANYTHING BUT FABRIC, THREAD OR YARN. Seriously. Using these scissors will be punishable by death. And no fellow crafter would put her anywhere near a jail. For a gift which will be treasured forever, you can’t go wrong with the perfect pair of scissors. Another lovely option is a book. They come in all shapes and sizes: technique and pattern books, memoirs of other crafters, mysteries featuring sleuths who do the same craft as your loved one, collections of humorous essays. All of these things exist! For knitters, I recommend searching out Stephanie Pearl-McPhee, Franklin Habit and Clara Parkes. Those three writers make me laugh and cry and inspire me to knit even more than I already knit. Which is a lot. If you don’t want to lose your sweetie to a book, knitters and crocheters love gadgets! Yarn bowls that contain the yarn and keep it from running around her feet, little yarn

cake turntables with spikes in the middle which spear the ball of yarn so it spins while being knitted or crocheted, blocking boards, lace wires, knitting travel kits, ball winders, swifts. All of these are useful tools. But perhaps you are looking for beautiful jewels? Sparkly stitch markers and sets of fun but handy project bags will bring her delight. As she knits up her next project, those shiny trinkets will dance along her needles. And you’ll always know her favorite project when she pulls out the project bag you gave her. No jewel can compete with yarn, however! Seriously, any soft and lovely skein of yarn will send your knitter/ crocheter into orbit. With your budget in her mind, the salesperson will lead you over to the luxury fibers and you can get one (or more) precious skeins. Can you say baby alpaca? The easiest choice? A gift certificate. You may think it’s not personal enough, but your beloved will thank you as she spends hours going back and forth between the perfect ball of yarn and a tool of the trade, chatting with her favorite salesperson. The ultimate gift for your crafter, though, is the gift of uninterrupted time to play. Take the kids to the park, wash the dishes after dinner, grab the dog and head out for a walk. Give your knitter a little time to count her stitches or pick the perfect pattern on Ravelry. Give your crocheter a chance to start that tricky amigurumi or work out a stitch pattern without fear of being interrupted. Then, when you return, make tea or coffee (pick her poison) and pour two cups. Time to Knitflix and Chill! Happy Holidays, y’all. (I get to say that now that I live in the south.) (And because I was raised in the south.) I can almost guarantee that your gift will come back to you. -LA Bourgeois knits and writes around the web at

Routt County Gift Ideas

She thanked me on Boxing Day. Are you at a loss for a gift for your knitter or crocheter? I am here for you, too. First, asking isn’t out of the question. I mean, most people are willing to share. If you really want to surprise her (yes, men are knitters and crocheters too, but I’ll use the generic her for this essay. Know I mean her or him), watch her while she crafts. Note the type of yarn she uses, any points where she might struggle, whether or not she uses shiny sweet stitch markers or fun project bags.

A man doesn’t plant a tree for himself. He plants it for posterity.—Alexander Smith


December 2017

Valley Voice

The Wandering Rose

Swept Clean Gold glitter sparkled on top of Audrey Rose’s hot chocolate. She walked out the door of Off the Beaten Path bookstore on her way for a stroll under Main Street’s twinkling lights. She was blowing on the steaming beverage when Wind whooshed past in a hurry, knocking the cocoa out of her hand, splattering chocolate and gold across the snow. “Wind, where are you going in such a hurry?”

she asked. “If you want to know you’ll have to follow me,” said Wind, not bothering to wait for a response.

Audrey Rose had been so looking forward to sipping her hot chocolate as she wandered down Main Street looking at the winter window displays and filling herself with holiday cheer. However, Audrey Rose was never one to pass up an adventure. “Wait for me,” she called. Wind slowed for no one, so Audrey Rose found herself running faster than she had ever run in her life. The walls of the world blurred around her and everything she had known disappeared. The aspen trees were gone and so were the firs, the ski mountain dotted with winter enthusiasts, bright holiday clothes and the scattered lights of the Yampa Valley. Wind blew and blew and blew over mountains and through valleys until Wind suddenly stopped. Audrey Rose fell over gasping for air. Minutes passed before she could breathe normally again and take in the world around her. There was no snow or fir trees or aspens. There was only stone and sand, a landscape carved

by wind, rain and sun. There were no stores or lights, no chocolate or glitter, only the world as it had once been. Wind stopped to rest beside Audrey for a moment. “Why here?” asked Audrey. Wind sighed, causing sand to shift and flee. “There is wonder here when I leave,” said Wind. “Most places I leave only disaster.” Wind heaved itself up and began on its journey, leaving Audrey Rose in an unfamiliar world. She took a moment to really look around her. Red rock had been carved into waves she could walk over. Canyons spread out below her, and rocks standing like sentinels guarded the space. Audrey Rose got up and started climbing. On top she might be able to see where she was, to find her way home if she chose ever to go back home. She climbed to the top and as she did so, she realized without Wind there was no noise, save for the occasional flap of wings as a bird passed by. There were no cars or houses or rivers. Simply silence. As Audrey Rose climbed higher she came to a natural amphitheater carved into the stone. The rock was striped red, pink, yellow and gold. In the heart of the amphitheater there was a single dune of sand, and on top of the dune was a bright green audience of one, a thin stalk with three leaves sprouting from it. The stalk wavered in the cool of the morning, the golden light just beginning to rise from sleep. Audrey Rose danced with the stalk, sang a song of old before beginning to feel a deep thirst burning inside. She wandered in search of water, which seemed a hopeless task. She wondered what she would do when a chipmunk darted between her feet. Realizing Audrey Rose was not made of stone, the chipmunk skedaddled for shelter. Audrey Rose, thinking all animals need water to survive, thought the chipmunk would lead her where she needed to go. She followed him into the shade of two rocks that crashed together. In the dark, Audrey’s toe fell into something wet. Her eyes adjusted to the dark after a moment. A puddle. She got on her knees and scooped the water into her mouth. The cold, clear liquid filled her belly and refreshed her mind. She wanted to crawl into the water but the puddle was too small and the water too precious for her to take selfishly.

began with sparks of light flashing here and there as Sun stole into the dark. Down she went over boulders, through tunnels, following the scratchings Chipmunk left in the sand. Audrey’s toes curled into the sand, felt the roughness of rock until the world opened up once again this time into a huge cavern. Something about the place caused Audrey to sit down. She felt quiet inside. How long had it been since no thoughts had flowed through her mind, since she wasn’t worried about time or people or places? Here there was nothing other than what was. Audrey Rose lay on the cold sand. She watched the tendrils of Sun stretch down to meet her until a shaft of light illuminated the cavern, turning the world around her a fiery red. The light reached for her, drifted slowly over her body, her toes, her calves, her belly, her neck, resting light and warmth on her eyes, blinding her for a moment. Then as quickly as it had come, Sun was gone, too, and the light inside slowly faded. Chipmunk was gone, Sun and Wind were gone and Audrey Rose was on her own. The earth began to turn cold. Audrey Rose dug a bed in the sand, crawled in and rested her heart for a while. As she slept her dreams were white, pure. Moon woke Audrey Rose, whispered that Moon could lead her home. The shadows Moon cast were darker than sun’s light, softer somehow. Out of the brightness of day, Audrey Rose saw a world where shapes shifted around her, lines blurred and the stars above leaped and dove throughout the night. Crescent Moon beamed a path, the path that would take Audrey Rose home. Audrey Rose climbed out of the canyon, past the sentinels, over the rock carved wave, into bushes and trees and snow. When Moon sank low on the horizon, Audrey Rose could see the last lights of night twinkling in the Yampa Valley. She could feel the energy of the people, knew when she got home there would be people to see and places to go and sounds to hear and sights to see. Wind picked up making each step towards home harder. Sun would rise soon and the world would be too bright. Audrey Rose did not know how long she had been gone but she wasn’t ready to go home. She turned around, felt Wind at her back and headed towards a world swept clean.

Chipmunk peeked her head out and chattered at Audrey Rose, beckoning her to follow. Past the puddle a tunnel

Have a Safe Winter Season and Please Don’t Drink and Drive! For those who live here and for those who wish they did.

The average price of a DUI has gone up to $13,530 in Colorado Remember that serving to anyone under 21 (even in your home) is illegal according to the Social Host Ordinance.

Valley Voice

December 2017


Mister Helpful’s Dating Guide

The Balance of the Sexes

It’s all about your Happiness

By Mr. Helpful, M.D.

I love it when life overcomes its own stupid self and the world grows up out of a primitive mind set into the next evolution. The old, tired phrase thrown at us by “those in charge of saying it for hype” is the Battle of the Sexes. Have you ever witnessed a true partnership between a man and a woman? Balance, give and take, your turn my turn. Truly a beautiful thing. A challenging thing? Sure. Easy? Nope. One of the most perfect symbols created by mankind is that of the Yin Yang. A teardrop of white with a small circle of black in it, perfectly blended alongside its own opposite mirror image. The representation is that no one concept is completely black and white. There will always be a little bit of one spilled into the other; such is life. And now we can talk about Male and Female energetic balance and true partnership. Story Time: Karen (31 and not her real name of course) and I sat for a long time together and chatted about what was working and not working in her relationships. After sharing insights to what she liked and didn’t like about previous boyfriends, the bigger picture began to emerge. “This one guy called me Madam President because I have aspirations for running for office. He would call himself my General.” There it was – the dynamic of what worked for her in a relationship. She wants to be first and her partner to support her. There are some who would call her an In Charge Pushy Bitch. The people who call her that are called Insecure Assholes. Outmoded ways of thinking and acting are based in fear, insecurity and a childish notion that the jokes and references that our dads used to make are still funny and relevant. As we read and hear the headlines around the country these days, those jokes, attitudes and actions are rapidly on their way out. Good riddance.

Karen is a highly intelligent woman who is well on her way to understanding the mature woman she is becoming. Identifying her preferences in a partner is a valuable piece of the puzzle to anyone’s life. She wants a partner who not only “gets her” when it comes to private time together, but can respect her in front of the crowd when it’s time for her to step up and make a point that can swing an opportunity to her favor. “I want him to be comfortable when we go to a party and I have to schmooze with the big wigs. He’s not allowed to be a part of that conversation and can’t ruin the night for me by being jealous of me being in the spotlight.” THAT takes a special man, a nonjealous type of man. I used the term Beta Male and she hated it. Haha! However it’s mostly true and there are those who are the best Lieutenants anyone can have next to them. These are not the generals, nor the spotlight hogs. These great individuals are the support team and amazing partners for anyone. These men understand and live in balance with the women next to them. In public, she’s the arrow on fire yelling follow me. At home, she wants to cuddle up next to him while watching GoTs and loving the man who cuddles her. This is partly what Karen wants. What do you want? In the balance of your life – do you want to be the white part or the black part? Spotlight or shadow? But that’s a public thing, what about in the house? Behind closed doors? We all want to be on top sometimes and have someone on top of us other times. We all want to dominate and be dominated. It depends on the moment, our moods. From one minute to the next things change, we change, the positions of our partnership change and we adapt to it. This is true life, true balance, true love. I heard a fantastic concept recently. The premise was: what if we wanted a job that we would throw ourselves into understanding. We would study it every day. Constantly improve our knowledge of every aspect of that job until we mastered it. It would take years to grasp the subtleties, but we would never give up.

What if we took the capitalistic approach to earning money, gaining social status and climbing the corporate ladder – and instead did the same for our partner? What if we studied the men and women right next to us and made understanding them our daily task? To make them happy in a way that makes THEM happy and not just our guessing or faking it? What if we were to understand them so well, that we could kiss them in the manner they want to be kissed? To love them in not in the way WE want to prove our love to them, but to love them … exactly how they want to be loved… because we payed attention to them. The balance of the sexes is more about understanding what works and what doesn’t work for the other person. The American ideal of the individual as the greatest thing on earth is showing its rusty side. Without partnership, without family, without community – there is no future. The Yin Yang symbol is not a fixed object. It is a twisting, swirling event. If we start to understand, plan and live in balance for the greater good – there is a chance we could be happier than we were yesterday. Easy to say. Words are only skin deep, HA! The greater challenge is to put into action these words when the opportunity presents itself. To not do the thing we would regularly do in that case. To not say the stupid thing that is on the tip of our tongue. To be smarter than we were yesterday. Discover more about yourself by understanding … them. You can do it, I believe in you.

Find Mister Helpful’s Dating Guide on Facebook, hit the LIKE button and read the expanded versions of this column. Next month – Shaving body parts – How a fun and playful mood can go too far. Razor burns, cuts and how losing an eyebrow IS as bad as you think.

“I don’t care how much it costs to keep me alive, just get back out there and make everybody love me.” Drag me to the moon, to catch a star and seize its brilliance as I’m swept up in amorphous dust.—Bradley Chicho


December 2017

Valley Voice


Beer of the Month:

Thursday - Saturday: 10am - 11pm Sunday - Wednesday: 10am - 10pm Come on in this December, to see my old pal Bumbles’ identical second cousin. He’s only in town for a month, so make sure to visit him at Arctic Liquors.

Crazy Mountain Brewing

A Closer Look

Altitude Sickness By Monica Yager What do acupuncture, doTerra essential oils, intravenous vitamin infusions, and anti-oxidant supplements have in common? Besides all being non-science based practices and products, they are all promoted for treatment of altitude sickness. Is this in the best interests of health care consumers? Altitude sickness can be a very serious condition. Some people can be affected at an altitude of 5,000 feet, but the higher altitudes with the ski and hiking trails are 7,500 feet and higher and that is where altitude sickness can become an issue. There are three forms of altitude sickness; the most common one is also the mildest form, called acute mountain sickness or AMS. The higher the altitude, the less oxygen is inhaled, causing symptoms including headache, nausea, shortness of breath, light-headedness, irritability and fatigue and can affect anyone, including fit and healthy people and life-long residents. For most people, AMS resolves in a relatively short time, but anyone experiencing AMS can be at risk for the other two forms of altitude sickness: high altitude pulmonary edema (HAPE) and high altitude cerebral edema (HACE), both of which can be deadly within hours. Pulmonary edema, the build up fluid in the lungs, causes progressive shortness of breath, cough with pink foam and increased heart rate. Cerebral edema, the build up of fluid in the brain, causes severe headache, vomiting, lethargy, irrational or bizarre behavior, clumsiness, confusion, and coma. So what can non-science based practices and products do for altitude sickness?

Are you trying to figure out what to give your painful pet for the holidays?

How about discounted IPM (Integrative physical medicine) sessions.

What it is: An alternative side effect free pain treatment. We offer cold laser therapy and acupuncture. Cold laser increases blood flow and acupuncture enables chronic muscle tightness to be alleviated. We have the ability for dry needling and electrostimulation of acupuncture needles. In addition, we carry both western and eastern oral pain medications for additional pain control needs.

Acupuncture, the insertion of needles into the skin, has not been proven to do anything, for any condition. The points, or meridians, where the needles are placed have never been proven to exist, by science-based medicine or the alternative health world. Also, acupuncturists do not have the training or ability to diagnose or treat anything. DoTerra essential oils also have not been proven to do anything, for any condition. Further, promoting oils for altitude sickness reveals rather fanciful notions. For instance, frankincense oil is promoted as being able to increase oxygen, thereby alleviating altitude sickness, allegedly. How this is supposed to happen is not explained.

For the month of December we are offering $30.00 off our IPM package and $20.00 off our cold laser therapy package. Happy Holidays to all our wonderful clients and their fur friends. 102 Anglers Drive

970-879-5273 For those who live here and for those who wish they did.

But in the real world, oxygen levels are fairly consistent at 21 percent, regardless of altitude. What does change with altitude is atmospheric pressure, which pushes oxygen into the lungs, and becomes less dense the higher the altitude. So, even if frankincense oil could magically increase oxygen, it would be of no help. Also, oil sellers do not have the training or ability to diagnose or treat…anything. Intravenous vitamin infusions are medically used when there is a deficiency of a particular vitamin, but not for altitude sickness. Intravenous vitamin infusions in the alternative health world are used for every imaginable, self-limiting condition. However, there is no evidence that vitamin infusions are effective for any condition. Also, practitioners of storefront vitamin infusion practices do not have the training or ability to diagnose or treat… anything. Antioxidant supplements, in a recent review of studies, showed no benefit for altitude sickness. So, it appears the other thing these alternative practices and products have in common is that they are seriously lacking as health care and can cause great harm by misleading health care consumers. The best recommendation to prevent altitude sickness is not found in a specially placed needle, or magic oil, peculiar vitamin infusion, or random pills, and it doesn’t cost anything. Slow ascent is the recommendation of medical doctors and professional climbers to prevent altitude sickness. The Golden Rules 1. If you feel unwell, you have altitude sickness until proven otherwise 2. Do not ascend further if you have symptoms of altitude sickness 3. If you are getting worse then descend immediately *created by Dr David Shlim A Closer Look is the culmination of witnessing first-hand the wackiness of the alternative health world from the perspective of a former owner of a health food store. Everyone can and should take a closer look, especially when it comes to their health.

Valley Voice

December 2017


A Mystic’s Life

All Cattle, No Hat By Lorre Buss

I recently bought a whole chicken at the grocery store. Organic, though not pastured. I was going to make some stock with which to make soup. I’d never made stock before. Store bought was fine for me, until each and every brand contained some ingredient my body preferred to avoid. I don’t have time to hover over my stove for hours on end, so into my new crockpot the chicken went, along with some onions, carrots, celery, thyme and salt. The plan was to cook up the chicken as I would a roast, eat the meat, and re-use the skeleton to get a good broth. Everything went accordingly. I enjoyed the chicken and veggies for several meals and created a lovely brew, which patiently waited in my refrigerator until I had time to prepare creamy wild rice soup. I purchased the requisite ingredients: more carrots, celery, onion, some mushrooms, the rice, and milk. Before I fulfilled my culinary intentions, I attended a reception on Saturday evening. My friend Audrey is an artist and participated in a gallery show/sale; the reception was a fun social event she hosted after day one of the weekend affair. I savored one glass of wine (all I can typically handle) and some hors d’oeuvres. There were cheese plates, dried fruit, crackers and bread, onto which we spread the chicken pate with honey, which everyone agreed was phenomenal. It could have been the bread and crackers, or perhaps the sulfured apricots. Certainly the fact that I drank little water throughout the day was a factor. The next morning,

I awoke feeling sick. I declined a regular Sunday afternoon appointment for fun with friends and stayed home, doing all I could to recuperate. Fortunately, I had the chicken stock on hand. It was enormously helpful, and two full mugs healed my headache and the worst of my affliction. This is how my guidance has always worked: I think I’m doing something for a particular reason, and it turns out my fantasy was simply a diversionary tactic designed to get me somewhere I may otherwise not go. I moved to L.A. several years after college intending to make an easy living acting in national television commercials. Decent pay and not a lot of hours. (My fantasies are rife with ease.) Instead, I met a man with whom I wound up moving to San Francisco — a city to which I never would have moved by myself — and there meeting a gifted therapist who helped me break through the wall between where I was and where I needed to be. It was the platform from which I have launched everything that has happened in my life thus far, and an enormous blessing for which I’m forever grateful. I don’t recall what I thought I was going to do in Colorado when I left Fog City for the hills. Something grand, I’m sure. Whatever it was, it had no relation at all to midwifing a partner through his death process and burying his shrouded body in a simple grave dug by his friends. But that’s what happened, and it was a far more powerful experience than anything I could possibly have dreamed up. There’s a saying in Texas: “All hat, no cattle.” It refers to pretend ranchers who enjoy the land, a luxurious rural home, and maybe even some cows in the pasture. But they ain’t no cowboys. It’s all for show — or perhaps agricultural land tax breaks. We all like pizazz, the glitz and glitter of showy opulence and celebrity. Hollywood wouldn’t exist if we didn’t. But the truth is that, more often than not, the signs and spiritual direction we’re given on a day to day basis seem hohum indeed. I thought I was going to make soup. Instead, I was preparing a remedy for illness brought on by my own neglect of my body.

noon, I happened to reconnect with an old acquaintance, in a way that was unexpected, sudden and compelling. I have no idea what ultimate purpose this friendship serves, but so far I have been the fortunate recipient of my cohort’s potent healing energy. I have been under the gun for several months, during which I often feel I have reached my limit. On the verge of exhaustion, Gerald graciously infused me with energy from 1,000 miles away when I could not do so myself. Had I not been sick, I would have missed the opportunity to renew our relationship. Had I not prepared stock for soup, I would not have had on hand the remedy I needed to be well enough to participate in reconnecting. This is the story of being unattached to outcome, of going with the flow of instruction you are given at the time you receive it, and letting Life lead you where it will. If we knew what lay ahead for us, there would be no reason to live out the adventure. Sometimes we get glimpses, and sometimes we get a little bit of smoke and mirrors, just to push us onward. It matters not. What matters is that we pay attention to the still small voice, the nudge from within, and follow the divine exhortations we are given. Any city slicker can wear a hat, but without the cattle, you’ve got no ranch. It’s the ranch that holds the value.


Summer Storm By Marian Tolles Black clouds boil on the horizon ripped by swords of ragged lightning. Thunder like the roar of cannons follows closely on it’s heels. Fierce winds bring curtains of rain turning to bulles of hail, ricocheting from deck and cars. Willow trees lash the sky cracking, flinging down branches, daisies bend their foreheads to the ground. Then as suddenly as it began the wind stops, sunshine breaks through bathing aspens in golden light, turning raindrops to diamonds clinging to leaves. All is calm again.

And that’s not all. Because I was home sick Sunday after-

Real knowledge is to know the extent of one’s ignorance.—Confucius


December 2017

Valley Voice




Your Monthly Message By Chelsea Yepello Aries

March 21 - April 19

You will make your dreams come true when you buy that Cookie Monster costume and begin your quest to redeem his name. Go you, everyone is cheering for your success.


April 20 - May 20


May 20 - June 20


June 21 - July 22

True story... The Space Shuttle fixed the space station toilet out in the middle of the void. What? The last Space Shuttle flight in history was all about plumbing. Houston, we need a plunger. When you need that ego boost, try standing in the front row of a concert, then turning around and pretending that everyone is cheering for you. They love you, they really love you. If you think it should be easy, but instead find it exceedingly difficult, you may want to reassess the process in how it relates to life, the universe and everything. It isn’t easy, it isn’t hard, it’s just reality.


July 23 - August 23

You haven’t mentally changed... but you have been working out a lot... and taking more showers... and suddenly all of those nay-sayers are staring at you like you are the cheese to their wine. Well, take it as a compliment but keep them at arms-reach, you can never trust people who base their loyalty to you off of how you appeal to them.

RECREATIONAL SALES ONLY. Happy Hour is 7pm-10pm daily.


August 23 - September 22

Kudos to your new accomplishments and few mistakes along the way. The news of your success is traveling near and far, giving hope to the commoners and silly peasant folk. Aren’t you just the little living legend.

Not to be combined with any other discounts. Golden Leaf does not condone public consumption.


Recreational & Medical

1755 Lincoln Avenue Steamboat Springs, CO On the Free Bus Route

Hayden Branch

101 N. 6th Street



750 Hospital Loop Craig, Colorado 81625 Phone: 970-824-9411 e-mail:

For those who live here and for those who wish they did.


September 23 - October 23

It’s not really your problem unless you make it yours. Its like babysitting your friend’s snot nose brat of a kid. It’s only a problem when you forgot the duct tape and earplugs.


October 24 - November 21

You relish being single and living by yourself, yet sometimes you get lonely and yearn for someone to talk to in the middle of the night. But damn it, no one is drinking your milk and that makes all the difference.


November 22 - December 21

Although it’s strangely fascinating, it’s never a good idea to eat at a restaurant with pictures of the food on the menu unless you are a parent and ordering off of a kids menu for your small child... or you have a drunken slur, are seeing double, and maybe feeling a little sick. Same difference.


December 22 - January 19

You will be given the honor to drive a float in a local parade. Unfortunately, you forget the route and end up in a corn field somewhere in Idaho. Hmm...well at least you were hopeful and excited. Now you’re just kind of confused and in need of a stiff drink.


January 20 - February 18

It’s okay that you can’t figure out exactly what you are doing and where you are going; there really is no need to have it all together. You just need a vague idea, maybe a slight direction, all you need is just a little push to somewhere. Don’t worry about the rest of it.


February 19 - March 20

This fortnight you will have a romantic candlelit dinner with your special friend, only to have the night ended with the curtains being lit on fire and the broccoli being thrown out the window. Don’t worry, the story is much better than the dinner would have been anyway.

Valley Voice

December 2017

By Cully Kistler

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By Matt Scharf

Far From Home



December 2017

Illustration by

For those who live here and for those who wish they did.

Valley Voice

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