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NWGA'S PREMIER FEATURE MAGAZINE OCTOBER 2013

HIT

AFTER

HIT

GIRL

Cartersville native turned A-list starlet

CHLĂ–E GRACE

MORETZ

lays the smack down in a noholds-barred Q&A WITH

NEAL HOWARD

Photo art from KICK-ASS 2 (Universal Pictures/Marv Films/Plan B Entertainment)

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V3MAG

OCT2013 OPINIONS 20 CENTS &

PAUL GRIFFIN » Historic Desoto Theatre Foundation president

SENSIBILITY

+See pg. 38, "UNSILENCE OF THE LAMS"+

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42 TOUCHING

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Twenty-one years ago, the world was blessed (or cursed, depending on your personal tastes) with the debut album from country singer Billy Ray Cyrus. Among its 10 tracks of hillbilly-crossover gold, Some Gave All delivered the hit single “Achy Breaky Heart”— which, if you were alive and breathing in 1992, you couldn’t help but recognize along with Cyrus’ ponytail mullet and the advent of modern line dancing. (Not exactly the South’s proudest moment. But hey, we all make mistakes.) My personal opinion of his work notwithstanding, Billy Ray struck it rich and went on to release 12 more studio albums and eight top-10 singles on the country charts, though I doubt many of us could name any one of them besides “Achy Breaky”. It wasn’t just a good year for Cyrus’ music, either. Billy Ray and his wife also brought Destiny Hope Cyrus, now Miley Cyrus, into the world on Nov.

Ian Griffin

MANAGING PARTNER+ HEAD OF ADVERTISING

WRITERS

23, 1992. And when Billy Ray’s 15 minutes were over, he healed his achybroken heart by cleverly molding young Miley into a Disney Channel superstar via her hit series, Hannah Montana, which later thrust himself back into the spotlight by playing her dad on the show. If you had a daughter between the ages of 5 and 12 during its fourseason, 98-episode run, Montana was all but unavoidable. Little girls across the country began to idolize Miley’s character. They wore her wigs, even sang her songs ad nauseam. Of course, Ms. Cyrus isn’t the first—nor will she be the last— Disney-kid star to shed the rosy image affiliated with the major children’s networks (a la Brittany Spears), but she has certainly been the fastest to twerk her way to parent infamy. Already saddled with a handful of racy performances and videos that are breaking records for most online views, little Miley is now making Lady Gaga look like Peter, Paul and Mary. You have to wonder: How many of those views have come from faithful Hannah Montana fans who’ve stayed

NOTE CREATIVE PARTNER+HEAD DESIGNER+ EDITOR-IN-CHIEF

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. . . By no means am I 'condemning' Miley for her career choices or behavior. She is a young adult and free to express herself in whatever way she chooses...which, for now, appears to be following in the footsteps of Madonna. The major difference...is that Madonna

internet and TV in the 21st century is a task that requires much more attention—particularly when the child stars of today are becoming the soft-porn stars of tomorrow. So I say the following to you, Billy Ray, from father to father: Despite how supersweet those Hannah Montana royalty checks must look when they arrive in the mail each month, I know watching your little girl twerk onstage has to re-break the old achy breaky over and over again. If you ever need a good laugh to choke back those tears, though, just YouTube the old video of your own breakout single sometime. It’s always good for a chuckle.

didn't play D.J. Tanner on Full House before stripping awkwardly on American TV screens. loyal to Miley since she left her bubblegum alter-ego behind? Bad girls have been a fixture of pop music since the 1980s, and by no means am I “condemning” Miley for her career choices or behavior. She is a young adult and free to express herself in whatever way she chooses, which, for now, appears to be following in the footsteps of Madonna. The major difference between the two is that Madonna didn’t play D.J. Tanner on Full House before stripping awkwardly on American TV screens. These days, it seems like every Disney or Nickelodeon star gets a recording contract

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to accompany his or her lead role in a popular series, and this trend will no doubt continue to place parents in a tough spot. Had I only known the road Miley would travel, my then-preadolescent daughter and I would’ve kept backpacking it with Dora the Explorer until we reached a land far, far away from premium cable. Miley’s latest video for “Wrecking Ball” is—ah-hem, cough, cough—let’s just leave it at wow. Being a parent in the age of visual media has never been easy, but controlling what your children watch on the

IAN GRIFFIN, MANAGING PARTNER


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md

You spent 36 years as a sideline broadcaster for the Georgia Bulldogs starting in the early 1970s, and you experienced a lot of great moments. But I would imagine the ultimate moment was being a part of the 1980 championship year. Do you mind sharing what that experience means to you? When you’re part of a championship—even if you’re not a coach or a player, but by extension you’re a part of the team—that’s really special. And I was able to write a book with Lewis Grizzard (Glory! Glory! Georgia’s 1980 Championship Season: The Inside Story) after it was all over with, which was a very wonderful and exciting thing, and an enriching experience. But what made it so great was that Herschel Walker—who had that sensational freshman year—was from my hometown of Wrightsville (Ga.). So, having Herschel be the centerpiece of that championship, then being able to do the broadcasts of his games, then being able to write about his games that freshman year—and the rest of team’s—that was just terrific. I was often kidded, until Herschel came along, when I’d say something about Wrightsville. The coaches would say, Y’all play football down there? After Herschel came along they, didn’t ask that question. They lit out for Wrightsville.

LS

md

The catchphrase, “Whaddaya got, Loran?” is a now a part of Georgia football lore. Anybody who knows Georgia football knows exactly what someone is talking about when they hear that. How did that whole thing come about? I think Larry Munson (legendary UGA radio broadcaster and playby-play commentator) just had to say something—and the equipment, I’m sure, had something to do with it. I had a headset and a microphone that was only live when it was turned on in the booth upstairs. The producer could hear me if I were to say I’ve got something, and I’d let them know when I was ready. Then they would flash Larry a card when it was time to go down to the field.

LS

md LS

What was Larry Munson like when he wasn’t sitting behind the microphone? That’s very interesting. Munson was a kinda off-the-wall fellow. You’d be sitting there talking and, all of a sudden, he’d say something out of left field. Then, when he got to be a doomsayer, he’d walk in and say either I think we’re gonna be pretty good

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this year or he’d know about our left tackle not being ineligible—or he’d know this, or he’d know that—and immediately start bemoaning, groaning and worrying about the season. He’d worry about our shortage of material or personnel. He’d worry about the schedule, the competition. He was always very much like the coaching staff. He didn’t think we had a chance. I used to joke during the preseason: Vince (Dooley) and Munson are very optimistic this year. They think we’re gonna win three. A lot of the time you md spent on the sidelines was during the Vince Dooley

W H A T DOESN’T L O R A N H A V E ?

era, and it’s well known that you guys are really great friends. You even wrote a very popular book with him, Dooley’s Dawgs, that is a must-read for anyone who claims to be a Dawgs fan. What did you take away from watching Dooley work in his heyday? Vince was a very thorough executive. He was always prepared. Vince also had a remarkable ability—if he had 10 seconds to say something, he could factor in all the things that were important to say in that short time, and he had a remarkable gift for analyzing things while being factual and interesting. But having coached and then been a Marine, his deal was organization. He never failed to sit down, plan and organize. Vince also had a great interest in the library. I remember finding out that his first year here, he went to the library and wrote a story about it, and the AP (Associated Press) picked it up and it circulated around the Southeast. Frank Howard, the old colorful coach at Clemson whom I knew, says, Tell Dooley that library’s gonna be a nice, cool place to hide when the alumni come after him.

Before retiring to a tear-soaked farewell from the Bulldog Nation in 2010, UGA Football’s favorite

LS

former sideline broadcaster and current host of the Georgia News Network’s Sports Conversations,

LORAN SMITH, spent nearly four

decades of his life trawling the turf at Sanford Stadium for an answer to the now-famous question,

“Whaddaya got, Loran?” I n t e r v i e w b y M A T T D A V I S So, Vince was different. He did go to the library. He did spend time reading books. He did read into historical information, plaques and museums when he traveled. If he went to Savannah, he’d go to Fort


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tHey grOw up FAst... but tHey Aren’t 21 yet tHey grOw up FAst... tHey Aren’t 21 yet DID YOUbut KNOW... 24% of 6th graders agree “it’s easy to get alcohol” DID YOU KNOW... 44% of 8ththgraders agree “it’ s easy to get alcohol”2 24% of 6 graders s easy 24% of 6th gradersagree agree“it’ “it’s easytotoget getalcohol” alcohol” th gradersagree “it’s easytotoget alcohol”22 graders s easy 44% ofalcohol 88th Youth who consume are 5agree times“it’ more likelyget to alcohol” become dependent on

abuse alcoholalcohol than those who wait 21 or older Youthorwho consume are 5 times moreuntil likelyage to become dependent Youth whoonconsume alcohol are 5 times more likely to become dependent on or abuse alcohol than those who wait until age 21 or older33 3

or abuse than those whowho waitconsumed until age 21 or older Amongalcohol high school students alcohol,

Among high school students who consumed alcohol4 82% did so at their home or someone else’s home4 82% at theirstudents home orwho someone else’s alcohol, home Among did highsoschool consumed 4 82%drinking did so at their home or someone else’s home Underage cost billioninin2010 2010 Underagedrinking costthe the citizens of Georgia $1.4 billion

Underage drinking cost the citizens of Georgia $1.4 billion in 2010

ALCOHOL is tHe mOst COmmOnLy used drug AmOng Our nAtiOn’s yOung peOpLe, surpAssing tObACCO And iLLiCit drugs!1 ALCOHOL is tHe mOst COmmOnLy used drug AmOng Our nAtiOn’s yOung peOpLe, surpAssing tObACCO And iLLiCit drugs!1

learn more at stopalcoholunder21.org learn more at stopalcoholunder21.org scan the QR code to learn more

National Institute on Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism, Spotlight on Underage Drinking, No. 22 scan the QR code to learn more 32010 Georgia Student Health Survey, Georgia Department of Education Hingson RW, Heeren T, Winter MR. Age at drinking onset and alcohol dependence: age at onset, duration, and severity. Pediatrics 2006;160:739-746 342009 Youth Risk Behavioral Surveillance Survey http://health.state.ga.us/epi/cdiee/studenthealth.asp 1Hingson RW, Heeren T, Winter MR. Age at drinking onset and alcohol dependence: age at onset, duration, and severity. Pediatrics 2006;160:739–746 National Institute on Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism, Spotlight on Underage Drinking, No. 22 4 2009 Youth Risk Behavioral SurveyDepartment http://health.state.ga.us/epi/cdiee/studenthealth.asp vici / v3 magazine 2vini 2010vidi Georgia Student HealthSurveillance Survey, Georgia of Education 11National Institute on Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism, Spotlight on Underage Drinking, No.22 22010 Georgia Student Health Survey, Georgia Department of Education 2

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Pulaski…and check out the historical sites. He was very interested in history. Since you’ve been around college md football, a lot about the sport has changed. What would you say are the

biggest changes to the college game you’ve seen over the course of your career? Obviously, the size and speed. And the ability to score from anywhere on the field. In Vince’s era, coming along in 1964, he had some 7-to-nothing games, some 10-7 games, a lot of 14-7— but that’s the first couple minutes of the game now. The ability to score from anywhere on the field and to score often is so different from what was taking place in those early years. Then, with the size and speed of everybody, particularly with the linemen— you see defensive ends now who can dominate a game. It used to be there weren’t many defensive players who could dominate a game, especially linemen. That’s not the case anymore. The ability of the athletes is very stunning now, when you think about it.

LS

. . . The focus of our conversation md so far has obviously been UGA Football, but you cover a lot of other

sports, too. I listen to your radio program, Sports Conversations, quite often in fact, and I always enjoy hearing from the sports icons and luminaries you’re able to get on the show. Who are some of your favorite people, thus far, that you’ve [had the chance to interview]? I’ve had a lot of fun doing that show. I’ve spent time with Arnold Palmer, Jack Nicklaus. Lee Trevino is perhaps the most interesting and entertaining interview

LS

you could possibly have. He is a gifted conversationalist. He could sit down with no notes and have a room of the top 30 CEOs in America at wrapped attention. Then he could walk into a caddy shack and do the same thing with a bunch of caddies. Then do the same with daylaborers. He just has a remarkable ability to communicate. I had breakfast with him a time or two in recent years in Dallas, just the two of us, and he always pokes fun at his own [Latino] heritage. He told me, You know, I was 21 years old before I realized that ‘manual labor’ wasn’t a Mexican name. That’s the kind of clever humor he has. He’s very bright, very insightful, and he could tell you some things that’ll just go right to the heart of the golf swing. I don’t know why he’s not used more on TV. Perhaps he doesn’t want to do it. Perhaps he doesn’t want to travel. I’ve never asked him. With football, I’ve had the opportunity to talk to a lot of names like Phil Simms, who’s now the CBS analyst for their Sunday games, and Jim Nance, who’s the play-by-play guy for CBS’ NFL games … Jim and John Harbaugh, who faced each other in the Super Bowl last year—I was able to interview the two of them in the last year. I’ve met T. Boone Pickens

a couple of times. I interviewed him in Dallas and we had a chance to talk about college football, but we also had a chance to talk about a lot of other things—about energy prices for the future, et cetera. It’s a really wonderful experience to sit down and talk to guys like that. Last year I was in Texas again, and I drove from San Antonio to Houston and stopped in a little place called Goliad. I spent the afternoon with Bum Phillips, the former Oilers coach. So yes, I’ve been able to get around to a lot of very interesting, very accomplished athletes and coaches. I’ve always loved baseball, so it’s great to sit down and talk to Bobby Cox or somebody like Don Sutton of the Braves broadcast team, who also had that great career with the Los Angeles Dodgers … I got to interview Ted Williams one time. I might’ve been the last person to interview Ty Cobb, at his home in Cornelia, Ga. I’m pretty sure, but it may have been a guy from the Atlanta Journal. Not only do I learn a lot from all of this, it’s just great fun to talk to people who, at some point in their career, you could say were the best of their time. VVV

Sports Conversations with Loran Smith airs Saturdays 6-7 p.m. on WRGA 1470AM

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B

But for the words “I should have,” I could be living in Hollywood this very instant, mega wealthy, carousing with starlets, and Billy Bob Thornton would have first dibs on all my scripts. It didn’t work out that way. What happened instead was this: Many years ago, Billy Bob was a little-known actor in a successful TV sitcom. I was writing a humor column that was popular in Middle Georgia, and I had gotten my work into a couple of national publications. I ran into a cousin who told me she’d recently—briefly—met the producers of Thornton’s sitcom at a social event. “I should have told them about you!” she said suddenly, clasping her hands over her cheeks. Point being, I missed my big chance because networking doesn’t always work. It’s still the smarter way to work—better, at least, than blindly sending out résumés. Certainly better than cold calling. This experience has brought me to wonder, how do people build networking skills? We’re not born with them. And how does modern-media networking, such as LinkedIn

and Facebook, really help shy people better engage? Or does it keep them at arm’s length? My opinion is that these media, if used professionally, are very helpful. Yet, they are no substitute for genuine face-to-face time. That still means getting out in the world. I’ve heard about “friends” on Facebook who need to let others know that they just fed the dog or did the laundry, or went to Walmart for more dog food and laundry detergent.

come from being “amongst them”— PTA when my children were little, church, striking up conversations at fairs or parties, calling on old contacts, joining clubs in which you have a true interest. Those face-to-face contacts will bring you better work than anything else. Social media are just extra wrenches in your toolbox, not a do-it-all tool. I’ve known quite a few people who are miserable in their jobs but stick with it for the benefits to come. They spend what could be incredibly productive hours counting the days until they can retire, and calculating how well they can live after they pop the cork on that bottle of Kroger champagne. That’s no way to live. I’m sure Billy Bob Thornton would tell you the same thing—if only my cousin had gotten his phone number.

There are far too many "friends" on Facebook who need to let others know they just fed the dog or did the laundry, or went to Wal-Mart for more dog food and laundry detergent. "Friend" a clue: Nobody cares.

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“Friend” a clue: Nobody cares. At least nobody who might land you some work. Being a writer means you spend a good bit of time alone, but for all these years I’ve found that being “out there amongst them,” the people, is the most fun and the most productive time you’ll spend. The worst job I ever had was when someone plucked my résumé off an Internet-jobs board and offered me work. The money was OK but I hated it. I quit after three months and found betterpaying work the very next day. The most satisfying work I’ve found has

S

BizBits Speaking of social media, Twitter is going public despite Facebook’s disastrous initial public offering (IPO) in May 2012. Safe to say this will be


Cents& Sensibility with J . Bryant Steele

the most tweeted-about IPO of all time. In local politics, Floyd County citizens will vote Nov. 5 whether to approve a $65 million, five-year special local option sales tax. A good bit of the SPLOST would go toward infrastructure, which we rarely pay any attention to until it fails us. The sexier portion of the tax would go toward the ballyhooed, long-projected Tennis Center of Georgia. Which, in theory, would be built on Berry College property. Proponents tout jobs and tax revenue from the TCOG. We’ll see—if voters approve the SPLOST, that is. Two-thousand miles west in Colorado, voters recalled two state senators who’d had the “audacity” to support gun-control measures in the wake of the Aurora theater shooting last year. (How dare they.) Still, you’re supposed to vote to recall politicians because of malfeasance or incompetence, not because you disagree with their politics. That’s what general elections are for. But this story is another demonstration of

Trick or Tweet: Networking is Still About Who You See— You Know, in Person the vast power of the gun lobby in America. The legislation didn’t propose taking away anyone’s guns, just common-sense things like limiting magazine clips to 15 rounds. Nevertheless, the gun nuts cried recall. Back here in Georgia, lawmakers from both parties do agree on one thing: The dredging of the Port of Savannah is the state’s top economic priority if it is to stay competitive. And now it’s even a big enough issue that Vice President Joe Biden came down to push for it. The port

deal supports jobs all over the state, from the people on the river channel to your neighbors in the grocery store, and the state now appears prepared to fund the project if federal funding isn’t forthcoming. Though I’d be willing to bet the federal dollars will come. The Atlanta Falcon—actually, Arthur Blank—got his way since you and I last spoke. Both churches standing in the path of a new downtown stadium voted to sell for more than $30 million combined.

Now church leaders are talking about all the good they can do with the money—after expenses, of course. And finally, some interesting survey results I heard on the radio the other day: When people were asked if they approve of Obamacare, only 12 percent said yes. When asked if they approve of the Affordable Care Act (the legislation’s proper name), approvals nearly tripled. God help us, folks. These people vote. VVV

J. Bryant Steele is an awardwinning business journalist based in Rome, Ga. vini vidi vici / v3 magazine

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SCARY GOOD H

aving firmly established herself an A-list starlet with critically hailed performances in Hugo, KickAss and Kick-Ass 2, 500 Days of Summer, Dark Shadows, Movie 43, et al, 16-year-old

CHLĂ–E G RACE MORETZ

is already being deified in Hollywood circles as the next big thing—better yet, Streep. Refreshingly, though, there is ample reason this whip-smart young actor with deep ties to Rome, who so memorably plays a boiledover Carrie in the horror classic's 2013 remake (opening Oct. 18), is...well... Oh, let's just call it what it is: kicking ass and taking names

*

I N T E R V I E W

b y

N E A L H O W A R D


Photo art from KICK-ASS 2 (Universal Pictures/Marv Films/Plan B Entertainment)

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I

IN THE HOWDY-DO WORLD OF SMALL-TOWN MAGAZINE MEDIA, OFTENTIMES ITS' A TRIP THE WAY A SUBSTANTIVE INTERVIEW/FEATURE FALLS INTO ONE'S LAP. IN THE CASE OF MY FAVORITE ONE-ON-ONE SITDOWN IN SEVEN YEARS PUBLISHING V3 MAGAZINE, A HALF-HOUR POWWOW WITH HOLLYWOOD'S MOST POTENTIAL-PACKED YOUNG ACTOR, CHLOË GRACE MORETZ, HINGED ON—OF ALL MUNDANE THINGS—AN OIL CHANGE. "WHAT'S SHE BEEN IN THAT I MIGHT'VE SEEN?" I ASKED RUSS GATES OF QUICK TUNE & LUBE, MORETZ'S UNCLE, SOMETIME IN THE SPRING OF 2012. WE HAD STUMBLED RANDOMLY, SERENDIPITOUSLY, ONTO THE SUBJECT AS I WAITED FOR MY AGING SUV TO EMERGE FROM ONE OF HIS MAINTENANCE BAYS. "OH MAN, LET'S SEE..." HE SAID, MULTI-TASKING HIS DESKTOP PC AND STAPLER WITH THE DEFTNESS OF A MODEL T LINE WORKER FASTENING HOT RIVETS. "SHE WAS IN HUGO. SHE'S IN THE NEW TIM BURTON MOVIE, DARK SHADOWS. HMMM..." HANDS NEVER IDLING, HE EYED THE CEILING 'TIL HE SURFACED ANOTHER. "500 DAYS OF SUMMER. SHE WAS IN KICK-A..." THE THIRD TITLE HAD PERKED MY EARS. "500 DAYS OF SUMMER, YEAH? I REALLY LIKED THAT ONE." (THERE WAS A YOUNG FEMALE ACTOR WHO'D STOLEN THE OPENING SCENE FOR ME.) "WHO'D SHE PLAY?"—FINGERS CROSSED—"TOM'S LITTLE SISTER? IF SO, THAT GIRL HAS A SERIOUS FUTURE." HUGO (Paramount/GK Films), opposite co-star Asa Butterfield ELEVEN MONTHS LATER IN APRIL 2013, AS A CASUALLY CHIC'D, LEATHER KNEEBOOTED MORETZ BOUNDED DOWN THE STAIRS OF RUSS AND PAM GATES' HOME OFF HORSELEG CREEK, I FOUND MYSELF JUGGLING AN ODD BEVVY OF EMOTIONS: 1) THE MILD ENDORPHIN WOOSHHH I FEEL BEFORE INTERVIEWING A PUBLIC FIGURE WHOSE WORK I RESPECT. 2) A PINCH OF INSECURITY THAT PERHAPS, AT THE AGE OF 33, I HAVEN'T ACCOMPLISHED NEARLY ENOUGH. AND 3) HOPEFULNESS, GIVEN THAT WISE EYES TEND TO PRELUDE FABULOUS INTERVIEWS. DARK SHADOWS (Warner Bros./Village Roadshow)

w/ Oscar winner Julianne Moore,

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CARRIE (MGM/Screen Gems)

MORETZ CERTAINLY HAS THEM— DEEPLY INTELLIGENT, COW-LASHED, CONVENTION-DICING EYES—AND NOT LONG AFTER SHE BEGINS TO FIELD QUESTIONS ON HER HERETO BRIEF BUT SMASHING CAREER, I FEEL A FOURTH EMOTION SILENTLY STIRRING: ANXIETY—AS IN, PLEASE DON'T LET FAME PILLOW-SMOTHER THIS PROVEN YOUNG ARTIST'S PROMISE OF AN ICONIC CAREER. WHY DID I HAVE SUCH A PERSONAL STAKE IN IT, YOU ASK? MAYBE IT'S BECAUSE MORETZ APPEARS TO BE THE REAL DEAL IN BOTH TALENT AND CLARITY OF PERSPECTIVE, AS YOU'LL FIND IN THE Q&A TO FOLLOW

*


"IT WASN'T ONE OF THOSE THINGS WHERE OVERNIGHT IT WAS JUST LIKE,

OH HEY, I'M HERE! IT'S BEEN PROJECT AFTER PROJECT AFTER PROJECT." NH So, I finally watched Hugo last night, and it reiterated to me something I had already noticed about your filmography up to this point in your career. You always seem to play characters who are intellectually steadfast and not to be toyed with. Often they’re the moral anchors of the story. Is this a coincidence, or is it somehow a reflection of who you are as a person that simply bleeds through in casting? CGM To be honest, basically the way I get into a project is my mom and my brother go through and read the scripts first; I tell them what I want to see and do next; then they bring them home to me and I read them.

I have to feel connected to the character in some kind of way. Usually, a lot of the characters that I’m attracted to are strong women who are smart, who know what they want and know what they’re doing. And they’re never really a damsel in distress— not that that’s a bad type of character; it’s just that I lean toward stronger female characters because I’m the youngest girl [in a family of four older brothers] where, you know, you learn to play football or you don’t play. That’s how I’ve grown up, so it just bleeds into what I choose for my roles. NH There have been a million child stars

w/ Blake Lively, HICK (Stone River Prod./Lighthouse Entertainment)

in American cinema, but few with the quality of résumé you carry at 16. How is it that you have been in so many good films? CGM It’s been 11 years so far, and I’ve worked really hard—really, really hard— to get where we are. It wasn’t one of those things where overnight it was just like, Oh hey, I’m here! It’s been project after project after project. Some of my projects have never even come out, but I’ve done them. It’s about learning. All of it is learning. No matter how long you’ve been in this business, you’re always learning. The minute you start saying I have nothing more to learn is the minute you should just stop. I’m very serious about what I choose and I try to look ahead of the movie and what I might do after it. I try to plan in advance. NH . . . Of your upcoming films, is there one you’re particularly excited about, maybe because your character has the same kind of mirth we were just discussing? CGM I think the one I am most excited about is (director Kimberly Pierce’s remake of) Carrie, because I think it shows a vini vidi vici / v3 magazine

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"ONE OF THE FIRST MOVIES I WATCHED AS A KID THAT REALLY DREW ME IN WAS

BREAKFAST AT TIFFANY'S

DIARY OF A WIMPY KID, alongside Robert Capron (Twentieth Century Fox)

different side of me that no one has ever seen before. It’s the least “me” of any character I’ve ever done. NH I’ve been curious about that one. Exactly what kind of twist is the new director putting on it? CGM Kimberly Pierce (Boys Don’t Cry, Stop-Loss, The L Word) was the wild card to choose for the studios, and I think MGM did an amazing job choosing her. Because when most people hear “the remake of Carrie” they’re thinking, oh, it’s some kind of crazy, gorytype movie. But no, it’s actually a really intellectual movie— which is what Kimberly Pierce does. She really breaks it all down. NH How does she intellectualize it? CGM She’s a brilliant, brilliant woman and she’s been through so much in her own life, so what she brings to it is this maternal aspect. It’s a very female script...based around Margaret and Carrie—and that is the heart of the story. You really see something in it, you know? It’s not even really spoken, it’s just the texture of it. NH . . . Do you feel like the original [Carrie] steered too much toward the horror and gore quotient? CGM It was a different time period and making a movie like that was incredibly racy at the time. [Original director Brian DePalma] did a movie that, at that time, people were saying, oh my god, this is crazy. Whereas now there aren’t so many gory films or slasher films ... We wanted to make this a really psychological thriller—which is terrifying. It can be a really 30

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... I WAS LIKE, I DON'T KNOW WHAT THIS IS, I DON'T KNOW WHAT THIS MEANS, BUT WHATEVER THIS IS I WANT TO MAKE PEOPLE FEEL THIS WAY." scary movie and really crazy, but at the same time, you’re getting this aspect of it where you’re terrified but you’re interested. And you don’t want to close your eyes. You want to keep your eyes open and see everything that’s happening. NH I saw an interview with Brian DePalma (Carrie (1976), Scarface, The Untouchables) a few years ago, and when talking about the chainsaw/shower scene in Scarface, he said something to the affect of, Look back at that scene. We don’t show anything. It’s just the suggestion of something so horrific that disturbs the audience. Which is more clever, I think. And scarier. Do you feel like there’s any of this kind of ‘illusion of horror’ going on in the new Carrie? CGM . . .There’s always the part when she’s tearing up the town and going crazy—there’s that “moment.” But it’s never like, Oh my god, that woman just got decapitated! NH You mean it doesn’t reduce itself to leaning on shock value?

MOVIE 43 (Relativity Media/Virgin/Greenestreet Films)


CGM (Emphatically) No! It keeps you psychologically interested. And also, with respect to the telekinetic area of it—where she isn’t killing with her hands, she’s using these powers and manipulating things around her—it’s interesting. NH . . . Moving on to your personal connection with Northwest Georgia: You lived in Cartersville until you were five, correct? CGM I think I had my fifth birthday there, then I went to New York because my brother Trevor wanted to pursue Broadway. Then he got accepted to the Professional Performing Arts High School there. My mom is the type of mom where whether you want to be a football star, basketball star, you want to do piano or you want to be an actor, she follows you and lets you do what it is you want. So she was like, You know what, you got into this school, so we’re going to move to New York. We don’t know anyone there, but I’m going to do it because you guys want to do it. So we moved there, and as a kid I would hear Trevor rehearsing all of his lines in the apartment and reciting these long monologues to everyone. Eventually, I would just start picking them up in my head and memorizing these long monologues and reciting them to everyone. No one told me to do this, I just started doing it. And eventually I was like, Mom, please let me do whatever this means. I didn’t even know what it meant, I just knew I wanted to do it. NH Was there any aspect of the craft in particular that drew you into it, like the challenge of perfecting an accent or the observing of certain qualities in people? CGM I think it was mainly just making people feel. I thought it was a beautiful thing. One of the first movies I watched as a kid that really drew me in was Breakfast at Tiffany’s, and I remember seeing how Audrey Hepburn made me feel so happy and feel so much that I wanted to cry. It was this beautiful kind of three-dimensional thing that she put out, and as a kid I was like, I don’t know what this is, I don’t know what this means, but whatever this is I want to make people feel this way. I want to make people happy. I want to make people cry. I want to make people feel. I want to make people escape. And that’s the beauty about cinema, that you can go for an hour and a half, two hours, three hours, and live in a completely different world. NH In Diary of Wimpy Kid, one of your

character’s first lines is “This place is an intellectual wasteland,” in reference to her middle school. Is Hollywood an intellectual wasteland or an intellectual beacon? CGM (Laughs) It depends, to be honest. I mean, there are a lot of aspects to Hollywood. There’s obviously the crazy side where everything is rehab and craziness and partying, but there’s always that aspect to any place—even a small town. You can find anything you want to find. Then again, you find the most beautiful, intellectual, sweet, amazing, brilliant people in Hollywood that I’ve ever met. Meeting people like Julianne Moore and Kim Pierce, they are beautiful people. And within all the madness that people imagine Hollywood to be, there are people who actually care about it and really care about the work—not the fame. NH . . . Who is one of the bigger-name actors you’ve worked with who’s super heady about the craft? Someone who works really hard and it struck you as ‘that’s why they’re a professional’? CGM I just worked with Julianne Moore (as Margaret) on Carrie, and working with someone like that who I’ve looked up to for years and always just thought she was a brilliant, brilliant actress—when you meet someone who isn’t just a brilliant actress but a beautiful person inside and out, it changes everything for you. I gave her a present at the end of [filming], a wrapped gift, and it was something very special with a card that said that it was very special to me to see someone that powerful and that amazing not abuse their power, one. And also to be able to have a family with children and a husband who loves you and you love them, and then to be able to keep who you are within all of it. She does projects that are some of the darkest movies I’ve ever seen, and she’s still the most fun. We were doing some really dark stuff on Carrie, and they’d say cut, and we’d just be playing and joking and having fun. Then we’d go again, and she’d be down on the ground and I’d be crying. NH Your role in Dark Shadows found you working with Tim Burton (Edward Scissorhands, Beetlejuice, Big Fish) and a killer cast. What’s it like working on a Tim Burton set? CGM It was amazing. Not even just working with Tim, it was working with Michelle Pfeiffer, Johnny Depp, Helena Bonham Carter—all the people working on the set along with Tim—that was such an amazing experience. Even if I had two lines in a movie, I would work with him

again and his whole cast because he is an amazing person. NH Is that why certain directors have casts that follow them from film to film more often nowadays? CGM Well it’s that, and once you find a good connection where you’re both on the same page, that’s a hard thing to find. NH Sort of like politics or business, where when you find good people you keep them close? CGM Exactly, once you find those people, you keep them close to you. I’ve had the same publicist and the same manager since I was a kid. Basically, I’ve had my same agency for years now and kept the good people around. What I did was start out with people who love me—my mom, my brother, my business manager was my other brother. It’s keeping people around you who are good. NH Is finding those people (outside of family) a product of good fortune, or is it more research and deduction? CGM It’s a lot of strategy. Always, with any business, whether it’s medicine or politics or acting or whatever it is, you’re going to calculate your decisions. But it’s about having meetings and not jumping in just because you think someone’s cool or they have a cool roster of good people. NH It’s about intuition, then? CGM Exactly. You have to meet them and get to know them. Figure them out. NH For your role in the first Kick-Ass, you trained with Jackie Chan for three months. That must’ve been a trip. CGM I trained with his stunt company, yes. First I went to 8711, then I worked with his stunt company…in L.A. and, later, London. They go wherever the projects are. NH And you did your own stunts? CGM Yeah, I did a lot of my own stunts. In the first movie I did about 90 percent of my own stunts, because it was gun combat and knife combat and it was more stylized. The second movie I did less of my own stunts because it was more hand to hand— which hand to hand is very easy for me, but we added a lot of really rad, pretty crazy things in there to where it was just a little too dangerous for me to do. NH Was that your first really physical role? CGM Yeah, I was only 11 years old … I’ve always been an athletic kid, but at 11 years old you’re not working out on a regular vini vidi vici / v3 magazine

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basis and stuff, so I had to get into a lot of conditioning. But going into the second one I was already—you know, I work out on a regular basis now, so I was already conditioned. It was really just going in there and fine tuning. NH What is your general research method before a project? CGM My brother Trevor is my acting coach and, like I said, they find the scripts that [mirror what I want to do] and say, Ok, cool, I’ll go find that. And they’ll go out

and find different scripts they like, bring them back to me, then I just start reading them and looking over them. Then we get in contact with the director, the director and I start talking, then we figure out if I need to do some sort of read with the director or I might get some kind of offer. We build that relationship; we get together. And I love the rehearsal process, so I go over the script with Trevor and he puts in all these fun little beats and stuff… NH He’s a really integral part of your

"I LOVE ROME. I'VE ALWAYS HAD A FUN TIME HERE ... LIVING WHERE I LIVE IS AMAZING AND EVERYTHING, FOR SURE.

operation, isn’t he? CGM (Emphatically) Oh yeah. But after that it switches over to the director and I, and it’s like a big painting where the director and I just finish it off. NH You have an aunt (Pam Gates) who lives in Rome and you sometimes come here when there’s a lull in your schedule. Do you like Rome, or is it just a safe respite from the crazy side of Hollywood? CGM I love Rome. I’ve always had a fun time here. My mom and her sister both grew up in East Rome and went to East Rome High School. I’ve seen all the cheerleading pictures and everything else, you know. And my grandma raised them here and she’s here still. Our roots are here … I mean, I lived in Cartersville for a little bit, but my roots are in Rome. I love going down to Broad Street and eating at Harvest Moon. Living where I live is amazing and everything, for sure. L.A., New York, London—all the places I’ve been, I love those cities. But it’s always good to come to your to home, where you’re able to decompress and just live. VVV

L.A., NEW YORK, LONDON— ALL THE PLACES I'VE BEEN, I LOVE THOSE CITIES. BUT IT'S ALWAYS GOOD TO COME TO YOUR HOME, WHERE YOU'RE ABLE TO DECOMPRESS AND JUST LIVE."

A toe-tappin’, cider-sippin’, fun-for-everyone arts festival.

49th Annual

October 26 & 27 • 10 AM - 5 PM • Ridge Ferry Park • Rome, GA • www.chiaha.org 32

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Fall 2013 203 east 8th street rome, ga 30161 706.295.4203 women’s specialty clothing, accessories gifts vini vidi vici / v3 magazine& 33


I

I know it’s strange to start a column this way, but I like pears—and pairs, hence this whole wedding-planner gig I’ve got going. But I really like pears, the fruit. I like their shape, their golden, green and red tones. I also really like that a good pear is both sweet and crisp, a quality I greatly respect in people, too. And so, I collect pears. I have ceramic pears, pear-shaped candles, a crystal pear, a mini hand-painted canvas given to me by a former student intern. I even have a silver pear. About a year ago, I walked into my office one day to find a beautiful print of two pears—a pair of pears, if you will—sitting on my desk chair with a simple bow tied around it. This square canvas had appeared from nowhere. No card, no name. I could only assume the gift had come from some astute observer who’d been to my office and seen my random collection, then taken it upon her or himself to procure this cool print and leave it for me. What a treat. So random, yet so thoughtfully placed. In the midst of a wild month, when things just aren’t going according to plan and I find myself second-guessing my agenda, my path and my choices, that pear print is a reminder of the small gestures that make the hard days a little easier. There’s a quote I once read on a greeting card—it must’ve been a ‘thinking of you’ card—that said something along the lines of It’s not the big things in life that will kill you, it’s the everyday grind that will wear you down. So, how do we combat the doldrums? What can we do to put a little happy speed bump in the day to make the rest of the afternoon look a bit brighter? I say it’s time for more frequent, more regular “random” acts of kindness. It’s time to leave more pears lying around. I know the whole point of a random act is to be unexpected, but you can be unexpected every day—or at least a little more often. The biggest benefit: it makes you feel as good as you are making someone else feel. If you have known me for more than a minute, you know I have a Friends—yes, the sitcom—issue. I can quote episodes to the last word, and I’ve been known to freely parallel any circumstance in my own life to any semi-relevant storyline from the show. (For instance, I can’t move any piece of furniture without saying “pivot.”) Anyhow,

Trends& Traditions

once there was an episode where Phoebe tried to prove to Joey that a person could do a good deed without at all benefiting from it themselves. She was ultimately proven wrong, given that she always felt good about it inside after doing something kind for someone else. The moral: There are no selfless good deeds. But wait, if doing something kind for someone else is going to make you feel better too, then why are we not doing this more often? During a real-life friend’s recent 50th birthday celebration, the guest of honor challenged her family and friends to do something kind for someone else. I’m not quite sure if Allison wanted her friends to do 50 things each, or if 50 of

with Holly Lynch Thanksgiving, and recommit to our season of kindness. Let’s choose to do at least five kind and unexpected things for people, whether you think they need/deserve it or not. Oh, and let’s not tell anyone what we’re doing, either. I think the anonymity of the pear print was a huge part of why it lifted my spirits so. Someone thought of me in a kind way, but genuinely wanted no thanks in return. That’s true kindness. I love the stealthy nature of this project, too. Fun, fun, fun. I’m already devising ways to help out a few friends in ways I hope they’ll never figure out. Perhaps they’ll read this column and consider ways to pay the gesture forward. My first boss used to treat me to lunch frequently when I was first working. She knew how little I made and how hard I was working to be ‘on my own’. So, when I would protest and try to repay her, she would refuse. “Someday you’ll have a young person working for you,” she’d tell me. ���Take care of her and you’ll have paid me back.” She taught me a very valuable lesson about how to treat others. Now, when my college-student workers are having a tough time, I try to help them out in honor of that first boss. I hope that as you are reading this, you’re already devising lots of fun options. Offer a new mom an hour’s peace by watching her child, or offer to wash a few loads of laundry for her. Bring a cold beverage out to your sweet husband after he rakes the leaves (again). Slip a $20 into an out-ofwork friend’s coat pocket. Drop off a bag of dog food to the shelter. Leave a pear on someone’s desk. Just be kind. VVV

Grow a Pear:

Running Amok with Random Acts of Kindness

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her friends participated. Nevertheless, it was a great challenge. She suggested big commitments, like adopting rescue dogs, and several smaller gestures, like buying coffee for the person in line behind you at Starbucks. Later, people wrote in to her special event page with all kinds of fun things they had done to make someone’s day. The best part: I could tell how thrilled they were to do something kind for someone unexpected. Why make this a one-day cause, guys? Let’s celebrate Allison’s birthday each and every day, starting with a personal challenge to you individually, dear readers: In V3’s February 2013 edition of Trends & Traditions, I encouraged you to write five love letters. So, so many of you stopped me on the street to tell me you had participated. Let’s now take that challenge to action instead of using words. Let’s take these next several weeks, from now to

Holly Lynch

is owner of and head planner for The Season Special Events Planning at 250 Broad Street in Rome


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THANK YOU! We would like to thank the Rome-Floyd County area for believing in us! We have been blessed with the best little students in town. We are now at capacity and we have the parents to thank! Thanks for sharing such an important part of your child’s life with us. We strive to continue to love, care & teach each child at each and every stage they grow through. We are also happy to have a waiting list for the upcoming school year. Those families that are on our waiting list have paid the registration fee and and will be awarded the next available slot for the appropriate age group.

If you are interested in being added to the waiting list, please call 706.291.9977 for more information and a tour

238 Broad St Rome, GA 30161 36

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770.234.9000


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1825 Martha Berry Blvd. Rome, GA 30161 harbiclinic.com vini vidi vici / v3 magazine

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E

Eighty-five years ago in Rome, a man by the name of O.C. Lam had a vision for a downtown movie palace―a vision he later brought to life in the form of the Desoto Theatre. With over 1,000 seats and a state-of-the-art sound system, the venue, designed to emulate New York City’s Roxy Theatre, showed movies from it’s opening in August 1929 until 1982. It wasn’t long after the Desoto’s closing, however, that a new tenant, the Rome Little Theatre (RLT), reopened the downtown staple and began hosting stage performances of all kinds, in addition to further allowing local actors a needed sanctuary to hone their craft. The crowd capacity was reduced by more than half, consequently seating only about 480, and, as time spun on, the building began to slowly dilapidate. Aided by the work of the 38

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TEXT BY IAN GRIFFIN & NEAL HOWARD

RLT, things were patched up here and there as the Desoto’s meager budget would allow. But if the venue were to ever fully return to its former glory, a full-scale renovation would be the order of the day. Sure, the Desoto may well have been altogether lost were it not for the RLT’s staunch commitment to its home stage. Yet, if the theatre were ever to have a shot at truly bursting back onto the Broad Street scene as a viable, profitable enterprise in the year 2013, it would need help in the form on new blood. Enter: the Historic Desoto Theatre Foundation, formed in 2008. Now fueled by a clearly devised mission, renovations at the Desoto began shortly thereafter. And, some five years later, fundraising efforts continue to range far beyond the sphere of RLT ticket sales.

PHOTOS BY DEREK BELL One such event will take place Nov. 8-9, in the form of the Greene’s Jewelers Music Festival, headlined by the Tams; to be followed by the HDTF’s First Annual Pub & Grub Crawl. With Friday night (Nov. 8) dedicated to the crawl, ticketholders will kick off the evening beneath the Desoto marquee, where each will receive an armband to serve as his or her pass to all participating “pubs”—e.g. the Vault at Marie’s Southern Eatery, the Brewhouse, Harvest Moon, Mellow Mushroom, Johnny’s New York Style Pizza, 400 Block Bar,


performance not only looks to groove concertgoers into a rediscovered affinity for the Desoto, but also to show the people of Rome and Northwest Georgia that—for lack of a better stolen movie line—“if you build it, they will come.” “It seems like everyone who grew up here has a story connected to the theatre,” Jackson says. “I grew up here performing with the Rome Little Theatre, like so many other kids, but going further back I hear stories of first dates taking in a movie here, or a day on the town with the family. There is something magical about these stories. We wanted to bring The Tams here to not

only provide a great evening of music, but to meld together the Desoto’s wonderful history with it’s very bright future.” With all proceeds from foundation events going toward the restoration of the theatre, this festival is to reveal a celebration on multiple fronts. Mere footsteps inside the front door, for instance, festival-goers will steal a first glimpse of the Desoto’s wholly revitalized concessions area, lounge and restrooms. And with the help of the Fox Theatre Institute’s Molly Fortune, who once served as the restoration director for the Fox itself, updated features—the paint and plaster restoration of the main vestibule, et

FOR THE (RE)VISIONARIES OF THE HISTORIC DESOTO THEATRE FOUNDATION, A WEEKEND LINEUP SUCH AS THE NOV. 8-9 GREENE'S

MUSIC FESTIVAL/PUB & GRUB CRAWL

IS BUT ONE IN A SERIES OF BABY STEPS TO HELP ROME'S MOST TREASURED PERFORMANCE VENUE WALK UPRIGHT FOR THE LONG HAUL

UNSILENCE

OF THE LAMS Jefferson’s Restaurant, and Schroeder’s New Deli. “The idea is to highlight what the Desoto and downtown Rome have to offer in the form of entertainment,” says HDTF president-elect, Chris Jackson. “Each establishment has a special deal associated with the crawl that includes food and drinks, as well as a live band. The idea is go from pub to pub, in order to complete your dinner while enjoying a wide variety of music on Broad Street.” For the festival’s second helping Nov. 9, Saturday happenings will include a live show from legendary R&B group, The Tams, perhaps best known for their 1968 beach-classic single, “Be Young, Be Foolish, Be Happy”. This throwback

cetera—are but lone components in a much greater, long-term initiative. “We were so fortunate to receive help from the wonderful people at the Fox Theatre,” says Michelle Picon, HDTF vice president of special events. “Molly Fortune said many memorable things when she was evaluating the situation here, but the one comment that has become the central part of our vision is that you want a trip to The Desoto to be a special occasion. And that’s what we are striving to create with our renovations.” But while HDTF-led events such as Greene’s Music Festival and Pub & Grub Crawl are hosted by the foundation itself, group reps stress that many project successes up to this stage have depended greatly on partnerships like the one they currently have with Seven Hills Fellowship Church, whose leaders signed a long-term lease with vini vidi vici / v3 magazine

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a long-term lease with the promise that the foundation would make certain repairs, and by upholding our promises, that money has allowed us to make progress on so many of our goals. Without our partners and our current president, Paul Griffin, none of this would have been possible.” From architect Mark Cochran to interior designer Tommy Lam, the grandson of

MICHELLE PICON HDTF VICE PRESIDENT ELECT

the Desoto to hold Sunday worship services there. According to Picon, this deal helped cement funds for the old concessions area to be reimagined as the impressive new lounge and gallery. “When we were first approached by Seven Hills,” Picon explains, “they had outgrown there current place of worship and simply needed more space. They signed

CHRIS JACKSON HDTF PRESIDENT ELECT

Desoto founder O.C. Lam, each member of the project’s behind-the-scenes team has a personal connection to the theatre. Current president Paul Griffin, however, is the glue that has held them all together, say his HDTF colleagues. “The Desoto Theatre is important to Rome for it’s historical significance,” says outgoing president Griffin, “as well as the cultural and economic impact it has brought, and continues to bring, to downtown Rome. This is the largest renovation to the theatre since the early ’80s, and with the added space, renovated space and new seating, the Desoto will be able to handle the larger crowds coming to RLT and HDTF events.” To which incoming president Jackson adds, “We want The Desoto to be a mustsee destination for visitors, as well as locals. We are on our way to bringing the ‘wow factor’ back through the renovations, and the quality of entertainment [we book to play the theatre] will certainly follow suit.” VVV

TICKETS TO THE GREENE'S MUSIC FESTIVAL ARE $20; TICKETS TO THE PUB & GRUB CRAWL ARE $10. BOTH ARE AVAILABLE FOR PURCHASE ONLINE AT DESOTOTHEATRE.COM

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Touching theLine

a

with Kent Howard

As a father, there is truly nothing like the experience of being present for the birth of your children. If you are like me, the more babies you have, the easier the process becomes. The day my beautiful daughter was born, I remember every detail, including my wife’s my water-breaking phone call to the sound of my baby’s first cry. I vividly remember every last conversation with the doctors and nurses over the course of those next few days in the hospital. It was very obvious to them that I was nervous about taking my precious bundle of joy home, into the great unknown. Ahh life, where every day is an adventure. For a first-time parent, this great unknown can be extremely scary, and in that rookie year you sing Journey’s “Don’t Stop Believing” to a screaming baby at three in the morning while asking yourself, “How in the heck do you raise this thing?” But now that I’m a confident father with 12 years experience in a high school classroom, I’m happy to bring you good news: Ladies, gentlemen, newlyweds, expecting parents

A Thin Line That Can— and Should—Be Defined Whether you're pro-spank or no-spank when it comes to the issue of corporal punishment for today's kids, the fact of the mattter is that this generation's nearcomplete lack of discipline desperately needs reigning in

and young people who should wait many, many years before having babies, I have decided to write a column that can put that baby to bed (apologies for the pun). Each year on the first day of school, I ask my students at Adairsville High School the following set of questions. Usually, their responses give me valuable insight into the 42

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type of school year I am about to have with them, for reasons that are made obvious via their answers. I preface the series of questions with the phrase, “Raise your hand if you have ever…”: 1) Had a spanking/“whooping”? 2) If yes, did it hurt?

3) Been told NO in your life? 4) Been scared to tell your parents about your grades? 5) Seen your parent/guardian’s face in your mind before making a decision? 6) Had to do chores around your house before you were allowed to play? 7) Had to do homework before watching TV? 8) Had a parent say to you, “I brought you into this world and I can take you out.” 9) Had a parent say to you, “I am not your friend, I am your parent.” 10) Had a parent say to you, “I love you, but I don’t like you very much right now.”


If the students’ responses to these questions give them an arm workout, generally it will be a great year in terms of disciplinary referrals. On the flipside, if responses get moderate to little arm action, generally the year will take a little getting used to with regard to expectations for individual discipline. Either way, students will generally conform to the classroom rules because they learn to respect you and your classroom. However, I can’t help but notice the lack of discipline among our young people these days. Don’t get me wrong, many of our young people have the potential to run for president. Unfortunately, those young people are few and far between due to a lack of discipline. But what is the healthiest way to establish, at the very least, a modicum of disciplinary authority in your home? According to a May 2010 journal article written for the American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP), research data implies that frequent corporal punishment (a.k.a. spanking) increases a child’s risk of exhibiting aggression later in life. As parents, guardians, or appropriate disciplinarians, we do need to make sure that the discipline is appropriate for the specific act. I am in favor of an occasional spanking for extreme behavior—i.e. the reinforcement that comes with feeling a little pain, which is sometimes worth far more than a thousand words. Simply put, sometimes talking just doesn’t solve the issue with the same resoluteness as a mild dose of fear. But in tandem with that fear, there should be clearly communicated rules and expectations that are mutually understood. One time, an old ball coach told me the day after I’d had a minor coaching temper tantrum on the sideline, “Kent, you can’t chew a kid’s butt off for something he has never been taught. Before you chew, make sure he knows what you expect.”

The line between acceptance and approval is a very thin one when instilling discipline in any young person. Young people are very emotional, and even the most mature of teens is still relatively immature compared to the average adult. But explaining your disappointment and disapproval in their actions, both verbally and physically, can be tough on some parents. My teacher colleagues and I witness a lot of parents who desire to be their child’s best friend, but not an authority figure. This scenario makes discipline and accountability very difficult for young people to understand. Because children are immature, they have a hard time understanding why the best friend parent would talk to them about “everything”, allow them to drink underage with their friends, or even, in a 2-year-old’s case, say the word no hundreds of times yet become upset when they are disrespectful at home or act inappropriately at school. Good parenting starts and ends with discipline—and discipline is not code for violence. Another one of my coaching friends likes to describe discipline as, “the most sincere form of love.” Without discipline at a young age, children develop a sense of entitlement. They don’t have boundaries and tend to speak and act however they feel without a full understanding of the consequences. As adults, we must learn to accept that our teens will want to talk about things such as sex, drugs, and rock-n-roll, or occasionally be late to work or school. Or, in babies, they will refuse to put their shoes on when asked or whine when they don’t get a new toy. However, we do not have to approve of these actions. For many generations, a stern warning, the word ‘no’ or a warranted spanking worked. Why fix something that ain’t broke? Why not say ‘no’ regularly, warn

children of the consequences occasionally, and spank your kids if they deserve it? Because kids are different these days? Perhaps kids are different these days, but only in the sense that they’ve never been disciplined with any semblance of consistency. The thin line between acceptance and approval when disciplining your child cannot be ignored or avoid. In an ever-changing society that says one thing and parents—not best friends—who say another, it is becoming increasingly difficult to raise disciplined children. However, if you do want to take greater charge of your children’s behavior, you can begin to attack the issue with the help of the four-step guide below. I call it the “Tomato Sandwich of Discipline”: 1) The Bottom Slice of Bread— Build a relationship with your child. Spend time with them and tell them how much you love and adore them. They will respect you and the discipline you dole out. 2) The Tomato (without it, you have no sandwich)— Tell them no; enforce restrictions on videogames, time with friends, etc.; spank only when all else has failed 3) The Mayonnaise— Discuss your feelings; explain that you accept that they made a mistake, but make it a point to explain why you disapprove of their actions and why you won't tolerate seeing it again. 4) The Top Slice of Bread— Again, tell them how much you love them and want to help them succeed in life. VVV

Kent Howard is an 11-year NWGA educator, basketball coach and inspirational speaker. To book him for public engagements, call 706.767.3226 or email bookkenthoward@gmail.com

vini vidi vici / v3 magazine

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Make it a meal worth remembering. Where to eat in Northwest Georgia. vini vidi vici / v3 magazine

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V3mag October 2013